#i nearly am a 20 year old child im not cut out for this im play my touys

[ittybittybumblebee]

uim just a kid stuck in this fuck ass world what is it trying to Do to me its trying to hit me over the head with a hand shovel thats what it is trying to do

[sexygirleverlovingit]

'Just smile and wave.'

HIII, My name is Moxie or mox whatever you want to call me tots I got this blog page because well why wouldn't Im famous! Well was. I was a model for lots of things 😍😘 if you get what I mean. I am 19 years old nearly 20 I don't have any lebal on my sexuality I like what I like at the time. I'm a female she her all the way but whatever you are I don't care you could be a pig if you want still wouldn't care!

#livingthatlifeeee😜😜😜

Backstory and trap story below!

Backstory: Growing up moxie was in a broken home her father was just a drunk man all the time and her mother was the type to only care about herself and go gambling. She grew up just with herself and learnt how to take care of herself so took pride in her looks when she went to primary school so got praised for it and her mother did to so her mother put her into modeling as a child she loved it all eyes on her. In highschool she became a bully and selfish making fun of girls or boys or anyone who didn't look like her. She became a famous well known model on magazines.

Trap reasoning: duo to her bullying others and doing things that put her life at risk, she found herself among those who been trapped. She was a horrible girl growing up making others feel down about their looks but really she didn't appreciate her own looks she wanted to get plastic in her face. When she already had that natural beauty.

HER TRAP:

"hello moxie, I know you but you may not know me. But I want to play a game. You must be confused but soon you will not be. Remember all back in high-school. Those girls you bullied for their looks. While you where just feeling all those things. Every girl you bullied back then it affected them bad making them take away their natural beauty. You were willing to do dangerous surgery's to yourself to make fake beauty that could of cost you your life. You will cherish your life now. You will notice you tied to a board and you can't talk because of a wire that's in your mouth but you can see to your side. Many scarples are there. You must take them and at least make many new beautiful scars for yourself in every part of your body. If you do not the wire will move back in your mouth till your jaw is off. Will you finally appreciate your life or will you perish. Good luck you have 3 minutes."

Moxie eyes widened and dart around she could see the timer counting down she tried to move but all she could move was her arms she tried to get the wire off her but she couldn't she felt it slowly pulling back hurting her mouth she cries out in a panic and then slowly picks up the scalpel she first started with her thigh she cried out in pain making wounds to herself as the timer goes down she goes faster her arms her stomach chest and all but she didn't go for her face. Never. The timer was nearly out and she still wasn't free she cries out knowing the last part of her body was going to be her face. She shaken lifts her arms up to her face slowly cutting into it letting the blood spill like the rest of her wounds all over her body.

When the wires stopped pulling at her mouth and the things that tied her drops she falls to the floor coughing her hands going to her mouth feeling the sides of her mouth all cut up. She survived but at what cost.

This is an oc saw blog!!

[iampikachuhearmeroar]

ok so this post is like spawned from reading the notes on an age gaps in relationships post, that I just read while waking up today....

I think a big part of the discourse around age gaps in relationships is spurned on by again, the fuckin stupid ass elder millennials vs younger millennials (or even zillennials) and gen z bullshit "war". it's like, in the post I made like last month about a convo at my old work's staff christmas party in 2022, where one of the ladies in the finance team and the newish guy hired in my team (customer service)..... which was all about her being a 1989 millennial "just before the cusp of the 90s so I'm a REAL MILLENNIAL unlike you two (me and new emo guy who are 1995 (me) and 1997 (I think, emo guy)).... you fake-ass wannabe millennials. you're babies!!!! YOU GUYS HAVE NOTHING IN COMMON WITH ME!!!!" like yes we do, sadie. and i'm the cut-off for millennials in 1995. but I digress.

but to me, it's the elder millennials like this woman and even comedians (ie the elder millennial netflix standup special from iliza shelsinger whose 40 but was done in 2017 or whatever) who are breeding the idea that people in their mid 20s, born in the mid to late 90s are "uwu cute lil babies who i have NOTHING in common with, so therefore you are a child (and everyone else your age by extension are children), to me." in age gap relationship discourse.

like sadie, for the love of fuck. there is 6 years difference in age between us. you may be in you mid 30s, yes. so you obvs have a bit more life experience than me, in general.... and actually went through 9/11, possibly understanding the implications of it (which I didn't bc I was literally 5/6 years old in 2001 when it happened; but I still knew what the fuck it was... even though yes, we're aussie.... but this is always used as the major event that younger millennials are "too young to understand and that therefore means that they're not real millennials")..... and again, you really experienced y2k fashion properly; whereas I watched it unravel on TV. but that does NOT make me child, incapable of making my own decisions, according to you. apparently emo guy doesn't know what rent is..... when he was actively moving out of his rented place to move in with his girlfriend's parents (one of whom, we all worked with)???? like make up your mind.

but from the comedian side, particularly the iliza shelsinger special that im talking about, it's the insinuation that as a 1995 baby and the people just under me, like emo guy, have NO IDEA what a landline is???? and that again makes us babies.... children who don't know the ways of the world before our all-knowing smartphones, which are connected to our hands like edward scissorhands. again, of course i know what the fuck a landline is!!!!!! I used one up until about 2009??? when my friends finally started to get their mobiles. of course, it means that I didn't have my own private landline (and hamburger phone, thanks juno) to my own room, which was an expensive must-have, that very people few would have ACTUALLY HAD, in the 2000s.... bc by that time, cordless phones were a thing anyway. and the age gap between me and this comedian is 12 years. she's just turned 40, born in 1983. so, therefore, again, I am but a babe. a mere naive lamb in the world of more knowledgeable, wiley wolves. but you're in your 20s!!!! you DON'T KNOW THE HORROR!!! yes i do!!!! i fully do. bc we literally JUST GOT RID OF OUR LANDLINE PHONE LAST YEAR, IN 20 FUCKING 22!!!!! don't you dare tell me i don't know what it is.

moreover, bro. I am 20 fucking 8 (well, nearly). I turn 30 in two years time. yes, I may have never moved out of home (lol fucked up rental crisis.... and everything else, where the world is falling apart).... but I do pay my own car insurance and car loan (finally). hell!!!!! i BOUGHT my own car last year.... even if it wasn't fully in cash lol. I may have only had my first ever ~real adult~ job last year (kinda... and first job ever, period).... but that doesn't make me a child. I am still an adult, capable of making my own choices.... even if one of my choices is utterly refusing to date people... like, ever.... due to my horrendous past experiences with guys in my late teens. "but!!! but!! both of these women croon, YOU ARE STILL A CHILD! YOU HAVE HOPE!!! UNLIKE MY JADED ASS!!!" yeah. nah. my hope for the future fizzled out years ago. maybe not emo guy's. but mine defs has. and why is feeling jaded like a weird fucking milestone and badge of honour to wear???

in my actual life, one of my primary school best friends just divorced her high school sweetheart a couple of months ago. due to the guy changing his mind on having kids (ie he started wanting them, but he works one week one/one week off and fly in/fly out in the mines.... and since they were in another state, South Australia, they had NO family or friends to help my besite with the kid that she didn't even really want.... and he didn't want to do 50% of the housework and mental work for them). she owns a fucking house and pays house insurance. she works a high-powered government job in sydney now. my other primary school bestie, ironically, just got married to her uni sweetheart, and they're renting in the fucked up rental hellscape that is sydney. we all drive. we all have cars... even if I did take forever to get my full licence and my own car.

what, in any part of the above paragraph, is not a wiley adult wolf, just like both of these 80s babies think that they are???? both of these women who I've mentioned in this post would've had these conversations with past partners, and obviously with their current partners (the comedian had a kid in late 2022 I think, and the woman from work had like 2 or 3 kids, for example). they both own houses etc etc.

I fail to see how 90s kids are "uwu babies" in the eyes of elder millennials.... other than they're making that excuse to treat us like kids when it comes to dating someone with..... a let's say.... 5 to 12 year age difference, at the minimum. why would a 1983 or 1987 or 1990 "elder millennial" date a 1995 zillenial/baby millennial/cusper/whatever the fuck we're called, when *cue the "if she doesn't know X/what X is she's too young for you bro (or chick)! meme*... like "if she doesn't know what *enter a random 80s show here that an 80s kid grew up on* is, then she's too young for you, bro!!!

like who gives a fuck if I have never fucking watched idek Cheers or family ties or ALF or Fraiser (for early 90s) or whatever the fuck else???? maybe I didn't watch them bc I was literally fucking 2 years old??? so i was too young for the re-runs of these shows from 1997 onwards??? I was just vibing with rainbow brite (80s cartoon), dino riders (which was a short-lived 80s cartoon), the disney's gummi bears (late 80s cartoon) and every winnie the pooh movie and power rangers show or movie under the sun. oh, and of course, fucking Lion King and other 90s disney movies! that are all getting those godawful nostalgia cash grab live-action remakes that NO ONE has asked for, really. that for some reason, a lot of 80s babies seem to claim as theirs, and only theirs, for nostalgia and "disney adult" points. i also watched pokemon on VHS!!!! SHOCK!! HORROR!! I KNOW WHAT A VHS IS!!! (and we still have them).

just. my point is. i think some of the age gap discourse, if it's not about like power dynamics/abuse and whatever else.... is coming from this dumb as fuck generational divide of self-declared "elder millennials" who are now nearing 40 or are 40; or somewhere in their mid30s, trying to be so over-superior over the 20 somethings born in the mid to late 90s. (and now early 2000s kids, SHOCK!!! HORROR!!!- gen z... but i get this sometimes im ngl. the fuck you mean the young lawns guy who i had a short-lived crush on last year at work IS 20 FUCKING ONE (21)???? NO. NO IT CAN'T BE HAPPENING!!!! IT- IT- IT CAN. NOT. BE. FUCKING. HAPPENING????!!!!).

just for the love of fuck. get over this utter bullshit about "millennials are the best babies!!!!" bullshit and STOP infantilizing grown ass adults (even if i personally actively NEVER feel like one tbh lmao) just because of an utter bullshit arbitrary age classification used for marketing and sociological research purposes only..... and only because there's between a 6 (for the lady i know) to about 12 year age gap (the comedian) between an 80s baby and a mid 90s baby. we are of the same generation... and we can have successful relationships with people born in the 80s/elder millennials, despite the age gaps. not that i've had one personally lmao. but we all know someone with an older partner or friend or whatever.

but i'm also thinking about it since there's the debate around chris evans finally marrying alba bapitista. when he's 42 (so gen x but who gives a fuck)... but she's 26 (a zillennial) and a college grad.... so apparently SHE has NO rational decision making skills at the baby age of 26. and also around joe jonas divorcing sophie turner.... where he's using his age (34) against hers (27) as a reason to divorce her bc he's "more responsible" than her (eg. he's forced to look after HIS kids while HE is on tour in the US.... while sophie parties after wrapping up a tv show she's been working in the UK on for like 6 months to a year and also finally working.... after taking 2 to 3 years off for her kids and pregnancies.... and the uh.... GLOBAL PANDEMIC????), and bs like that. it's just making me gag tbh.

[mcleaha]

hello lovelies ! i’m bøffy , i’m 20 years old , prefer she/her pronouns , and currently reside in the pst timezone ! uhh . . . i am posting this intro at nearly 5 AM my time , and i would be almost willing to bet it’s littered with errors and it’s . . . probably a bit all – over – the – place since this is very much a new muse ! however , with that being said , if you give this a like , i will definitely contact you via tumblr ims or d!scord ( 𝓲𝓷𝓱𝓪𝓵𝓪 / 𝓮𝔁𝓱𝓪𝓵𝓪#1384 ) to plot !

[  jasmine brown  . 21  .  cis female .  she/her  ] just saw MALEAH AMICK dragging their suitcase up the steps to CABIN 1B  .  good luck living with HER  ,  i hear that that they’re INDECISIVE  ,  FORGETFUL ,  SOCIABLE  & CREATIVE  .  Apparently they’re the ATTACKING MIDFIELDER .  let’s hope the upcoming season doesn’t affect their JUNIOR year of ART EDUCATION .

STATS:

name: maleah amick .

nickname(s): leah .

age: twenty one .

gender identity: cis female .

pronouns: she/her .

sexual orientation: bisexual / biromantic .

birthday: 26 february 1999 .

zodiac sign: pisces .

myer-briggs: esfj .

pinterest: coming soon !

HISTORY:

               born on the 26th of february 1999 in orlando , florida , maleah was the youngest of the three amick siblings . her mother worked as a prestigious board – certified pediatric surgeon at a local children’s hospital , and her father worked as a high school mathematics teacher and volunteered as the school’s unpaid soccer coach , a move that saved the program from ending due to budget cuts ( he claims he was roped into the position as a first – year teacher with no seniority , but while he’s reluctant to admit it , he eventually grew a passion for the sport he had previously known little about ) .

               with her mother’s long shifts and emergency work – related calls , she ultimately became closer to her father and two older brothers while growing up . most knew her father as a man who towered over them at 6’7” , ordering his team to run laps or practice drills ; however , maleah knew him as the man who would crawl around the living room floor playing barbies with her or would prepare fruit and herbal teas as she twirled around dressed as a princess , declaring it time for a royal tea party . just as easily , she could be found exploring the great outdoors or playing whatever sport was currently in season alongside her brothers .

               she practically followed in her brothers’ footsteps . as they approached high school , each brother chose one sport to specialize in , hoping to secure a position on a college team and eventually on a professional team . maleah did not have professional athletic goals , but although she had immaculate grades with limited effort put towards academics , she knew extra – curricular activities were important for college applications . thus , when it was maleah’s turn to choose which sport to pursue , rather than having to weigh the pros and cons and make her own decision ( or perhaps , fearing that she would make the wrong decision ) , she simply chose the sport that her brothers had previously chosen : soccer .

               her high school coach knew the perfect position for maleah . years of informal practice with her brothers in the backyard had enhanced her skills . she had learned how to evade skilled high school defenses by pretending as if she was heading in one direction before bolting in the other .  soccer was one of the few areas in life in which she possessed enough knowledge to make quick and effective decisions ; she could read the field and immediately determine the best course of action : dribble , pass , or shoot . ultimately , she possessed the vision and the creativity necessary to secure playmaking and goal-scoring opportunities for her team .

               with a line of college scholarships , both academic and athletic , waiting for the attacking midfielder’s choice ( unfortunately , none from either of the schools her brothers played for ) , the time came for maleah to make a decision . as deadlines for summer practices , class registration , and tuition payments crept closer , she finally determined a means of deciding . she numbered her offer letters , 1 through 13 , and allowed a random number generator to make the decision for her . thus , mere chance ( or perhaps fate ) led maleah to hollis university .

               her first semester at hollis was . . . rough , to put it lightly . while most freshman shed a few tears as they watched their parents’ car drive off into the distance , homesickness lingered in maleah’s life . coasting through high school with limited effort had done her zero favors ; with no effective study skills , her grades dropped dramatically . between soccer and trying to salvage her grade point average , a social life was virtually out of question . ultimately , she found herself on academic probation , unable to play soccer , for her second semester of freshman year at hollis .

               luckily , she was able to develop effective study habits , and even discovered along the way that maybe pre – med was not the best major for her . when asked what she wanted to do , maleah gave an entire list of generic answers – “i want to help people” and “i want to make a difference” came up quite often , but nothing specific enough to point her in the right direction . thus , she changed her major almost every semester , desperately seeking for the right fit . in the meantime , though it took several letters petitioning her temporary removal from the team , she was able to resume playing soccer during her sophomore year .

               as junior year approached , maleah was almost certain that she was back in her coach’s good graces – no longer viewed with a sense of skepticism . she had proven herself capable , finding her name on the dean’s list nearly every semester and assisting her team in numerous wins throughout the soccer season . however , with hollis’ soccer teams’ restructuring , maleah can’t help but question if her coach views her as a valued athlete or a liability .

PERSONALITY:

               two words : social butterfly . almost to a fault . even if someone has expressed quite literally zero interest in talking to her / getting to know her , she will still make an attempt . kind of a . . . people – pleaser , in a sense , she just wants to be well – liked ?

               avoids ! conflict ! at ! all ! costs ! generally just . . . tries to avoid people or situations that upset her . not very prone to like . . . yelling or crying , but those close to her can definitely sense a change in her demeanor when she’s upset ? just . . . a lot more tense , probably lots of eye – rolling and just . . . subtle , quiet signs that she is over whatever the problem is .

               kinda . . . chill , mellow , easygoing ? she very much lives in the moment , and tries not to stress too much about the future . always down for a drink , a party , whatever – genuinely just around for some fun and some friends !!!

               the kind of person who genuinely gets excited over like those fun facts and jokes that are on popsicle sticks and whatnot – absolutely must share the information with everyone within earshot . honestly , those jokes are very . . . on point with her own personal sense of humor jflakdsj .

HEADCANONS:

               she suffers from a terrible case of youngest child syndrome . ultimately , without guidance , she’s terribly irresponsible . she’s always having to run extra laps because she sets her alarm too late to make it to morning practices on time . she’s always receiving overdraft fees for spending more money than is available in her checking account . forgets everything – from homework assignments to names to grabbing her keys before locking the door on her way out . just . . . imagine a child asking for an adult’s help and her looking around until she comes to the realization that “ oh , shit , i am an adult ” .

               she’s practically always doodling – in the corners of notebooks , on napkins while eating lunch , on her clothing , on her own skin . she loves making art , particularly drawing or painting portraits or nature . ( ultimately , she only decided to incorporate this into her choice of major after hollis threatened to not allow any further changes to her major ) .

               she has a . . . unique sense of style . she has a passion for thrifting and upcycling . practically lives in hoodies and t – shirts that she has purchased from secondhand stores and cropped herself . always adding cool iron-on patches to her clothing . she should be listed as your emergency contact if you’re prone to ripping your clothing because she can definitely fix it .

               she probably thinks she’s good at trash-talking on the field , but she actually sounds like a second grader ( and that’s being kind ) . if you looked at her browser history , there’s probably at least one record of her actually googling “ best soccer trash talk ” .

CONNECTIONS:

friends !! friends she’s met through courses throughout her adventures of attempting every major possible , mayhaps soccer friendships that continue off the field , mayhaps that complicated emerging new friendship state for some who are new to hollis ! unlikely friends ! best friends !!! quite literally those unbreakable ride – or – die friendships !

muses !! i feel like every artist needs that little dose of inspiration , even if it’s simply the inspiration of a work – in – progress portrait throughout the duration of camp ! complaints of “ stop moving ! ” and her stopping every ten minutes to ask what they think and probably at some point , her flinging a brush dripping of paint in their direction (if things didn’t end in an all – out paint fight djlfakds ) .

enemies !! honestly i’m sure there is ?? so much ?? potential for this , bt . . . mayhaps someone’s just . . . fed up w her irresponsibility ? thinks she doesn’t take her soccer position seriously ? maybe someone doesn’t think she takes anything seriously ( they wouldn’t be . . . wrong tbh ) . maybe someone from cali takes that “ california vs florida ” feud a little too seriously jflskdja . idk there’s always bound to be personality clashes !

exes !! relationships that ended badly , so she actively tries to avoid them and who even knows what happens when she’s forced to acknowledge their existence at some point at this camp !!! maybe relationships that ended on mutual terms so they’re still p chill with each other ?? maybe ended relationships that never quite got closure so there’s still unresolved feelings !!

hook-ups !! they are . . . college students . they are . . . college students stuck at a camp all summer . idk i feel like this one is pretty self – explanatory jflakds .

honestly i am tired & want to sleep , bt genuinely i am up for & open to anything ! good influences , bad influences , unrequited crushes , requited crushes , idk the world is y(our) oyster !! these are . . . rlly just some ideas to get the whole process started bc i am actually terrible at . . . thinking of plot ideas on the spot . always open to jst . . . doing a thread and seeing how things naturally flow too !

[scige-alt]

LIANA LIBERATO / CIS FEMALE — don’t look now, but is that saige beaumont i see? the 21 year old criminal psychology / linguistics student is in their sophomore year and she is a rochester alum. i hear they can be blithe, energetic, evasive and irrational, so maybe keep that in mind. i bet she will make a name for themselves living in murphy’s beach homes. ( james. 20. est. she/they. )

snjdfg these took so long i’m so sorry but anyways please LIKE and i’ll slide into yr IMs for plots !!

TW DRUG USE, ALCOHOLISM, IMPLIED ABUSE, ADDICTION, HIT & RUN.

a e s t h e t i c s

stick n’ pokes at 2am – when your drunk and giggling too much in between purposeful stabs, avoiding the cracks in the sidewalk because they’re bad luck and they’ll break your mother’s back – even if your mother doesn’t love you, because you love her, the familiar riff in an old song – one that’s got you strumming along silently; there is no guitar, only empty air lit by the christmas lights you haven’t taken down. it’s may. swallowing down shots, and by default, swallowing down problems. laughing quick, easily, constantly. skinned knees from skateboarding, despite being rubbish at it. wishes on eyelashes stuck to your cheekbones, glitter sticking, running into the ocean at sunrise; feeling at home. excuses, and the many forms they come in. telling people you love them through hand squeezes and fresh muffins, sideways glances and soft, eager grins.

general info !!

full name: saige alouette beaumont

nickname(s): n/a so give her some uwu

b.o.d. - july 7th, 21 whole yrs old.

label(s): the hedonist, the icarcian, the reveler, etc. etc.

height: 5′7″ !!

hometown: thibodaux, louisiana

sexuality: bisexual w/ a very slight preference towards masc-presenting folks

pinterest

stats

biography !!

the fallible daughter of two very infallible people: robert beaumont, US lieutenant general, and manon levesque, world renown fashion designer. both calculating, cold, and purposeful.

saige never believed she was created out of love. it was an action with a purpose, intentions to create the perfect child. the hybrid of both military genius and fashion extraordinaire, molded to their will.

it took them no more than six months after her birth for her parents to up and move, thus beginning the cycle of packing and unpacking, flying and driving, state-to-state and country-to-country. the longest saige had ever stayed in one place was two years.

kept on a short leash, homeschooled, and learning skills she had no interest in – she was more like a pet, a project, than a child. the world moved all around her, but she felt restrictively tethered to her parents.

she had always felt this way. a bird in a cage of thorns.

it was hard to keep and maintain friends – saige would be there one day, and gone the next. a ghost, a very visible ghost. even so, she tried her hardest.

running from bodyguards (nannies, in a sense. her father is a paranoid man) into festival crowds and climbing out of windows in the dark of night to swim in lakes with locals she’d meet only a few hours earlier – she absorbed as much of what she could get; this intense, undying love for a world she had always craved to see.

it was the start of something near dangerous – a phase that seemed to never end, rebellion coursing through her veins. a wild child in the making, unknowing of limits. the bad sort of crowd was the crowd she found herself landing, more often than not – introducing the sheltered girl to a world she hadn’t quite known existed

she ran away, briefly, at age fifteen with a man three years older than her – which nearly ended up in a tabloid magazine if it hadn’t been for her parents’ money. though the guilt of her parents’ disappointed weighed on her, the thrill fueled something much worse

from that point on, she became a problem child. from public intoxication to vandalism – it was clear their daughter was unraveling and nothing could contain her.

boarding school was a small attempt to stop it – she got expelled.

she hadn’t intended to go to university, either – but, by some chance – and after a mysterious year-long disappearance from public eye during her eighteenth year of life, next thing she knew, she was a student at lockwood university.

she was involved in a getaway chase from an armed robbery at a bank which then turned into a hit-and-run in washington when she was on the brink of turning eighteen. it was a situation she had no control over, not knowing her role in the scheme until it was too late to turn back. the victim survived but saige’s family has been paying the medical fees since then. her parents haven’t spoken to her since.

ever since the accident, saige has avoided causing too much trouble - generally staying out of headlines and tabloids, partially in fear of her parents finally cutting ties, and partially in fear of doing something that’ll cost another person their life.

personality !!

bubbly. so fucking bubbly. she’s got so much fucking energy on her – she goes running every morning and every night and swims like every afternoon and she’s n e v e r tired ?? the personality of a coke bottle shaken up but like if the bottle could laugh.

tries her hardest to be the Happy Fun friend, y’know, the one who can hook you up w/ some sicccc shit b/c she befriended/possibly slept with her drug dealer and now she gets discounts.

like, generally, comes off as very confident of herself and fearless and, like, yes–reckless, but like a fun reckless, y’know ??

talks a l o t, could ramble for days, hand gestures and all.

if she wants to do something, she will do it and there’s not much you can do to stop her tbh. she’s very easy-going, very go-go-go, very…mischievous, y’know? even if she’s trying to do something stupid you kinda just have to let her do it or otherwise she’ll mope for three hours and pout at you and you’ll feel ?? this weird sense of guilt ?? which isn’t the Best thing but she’s not the best person either so dfghjh

a vegetarian !! meat makes her sick, like, physically.

uuuhh her vocabulary consists of a lot of ‘likes’ and ‘ums’ and ‘y’knows’, y’know ??

i am like 99% sure she’s got adhd but she’s never been diagnosed with it b/c her parents suck with that stuff. her parents sort of suck in general.

like…she’s currently not on speaking terms with them. she’s not disowned…like, yet, but they haven’t said more than like five words to each other since saige was eighteen and it k i l l s her but they also send her a shit ton of money every month so.

owns like…four cars…..she has them all on campus…..she prolly isn’t suppose to…but she does…one of them’s a real sleek sports car, one is a jacked up pick-up truck that’s decked out in like LED lights n shit, one is the same exact fucking car from the princess diaries b/c saige is obsessed w/ the movie. the other is like. a mini cooper probably.

a photographer, her walls are covered in photographs and art and taped-down plants and in general her room is very ?? cluttered ?? like it’s very home-y but god. she’s a mess. clothes everywhere. she’s probably got a pile of instruments and other miscellaneous hobbies on a chair in the corner that she hasn’t touched in a while

speaking of !! she has a bunch of random, like, skills ?? like knitting and sewing and cooking and three different forms of ballroom dancing, and she can definitely work a gun and a car engine except she goes thru interests so rapidly and is disinterested in most of the other ones b/c her parents forced like half of them onto her.

she plays bass guitar. she loves her bass guitar. she knows other instruments but the only ones she’ll really fidget with are her bass guitar and like, her violin. everything else she’s like ~okay~ at

got really obsessed with languages at a young age and started learning them ?? her mother is like. super french, like genuinely from france, so she already grew up speaking both english and french but she’s learnt others for the hell of it and she’s still learning like three other at the same time which is a MESS but she’s a mess so like can u blame her sdfghj

but like i said, she’s v e r y reckless. very much a party girl. she uses like…quite a few drugs, both socially and alone and frankly – she’s rarely sober.

a budding alcoholic because she’s convinced that without it she’ll be Miserable and Horrible to everybody because she’s a Horrible, Awful person who is the absolute Worse and if drinking vodka mixed in with 23 crystal lite packets helps with not thinking like that then she’ll do it no questions asked

its a problem she’s been developing since she was younger, only amplified by … the situation, that happened when she was eighteen.

is essentially wearing this mask of confidence and giddiness and flirtatiousness b/c she doesnt want people to think she’s doing Not Okay.

she loves so much. she loves everything, everybody. falls in love like five times a day but nothing really sticks to her either. if ur a shitty person/come off as an asshole then she’ll be more likely to be attracted to her b/c shes Always been like this. finds them super interesting which is ?? questionable ?? sometimes i want to just. knock some sense into her but y’know what…it’s fine we’re Fine

she gets around p frequently but is also the type of person who’ll like, try n maintain a positive, good friendship with whoever she sleeps with b/c the idea of having regrettable encounters is smth that Bothers her and she just pretty much refuses.

it’s honestly a bit of a problem ?? she blurs the lines between friendship and Something, Anything More too often and with too many people b/c she just. wants to be loved. but there is never enough !

she does stick n pokes !! a whole bunch !! let her give you one !! she can’t draw for shit but i mean, who cares, right ??

uuuhh her mom sends her like…prototypes of things she designs n shit that isn’t out yet and saige 100% always gives it away or it sits in her closet and essentially that is her go-to gift for birthdays or christmas or whenever she feels like it

there’s literally sm i could say about her but i’ll stop Here b/c it’s getting too long sksksksk

wanted connections !!

give me. a best friend. just somebody who sticks by her side even though she’s a Mess

like, a ride or die ?? is that the same as a best friend ?? idc i want both :)

and just in general, like, people she’s p close to ?? she’s really friendly and is the kind of girl who’d be really popular in high school but doesn’t care abt popularity n talks to literally Everybody like she’s known them all her life.

ESP if ur muse is a lil grumpier !! she will fuck their shit up, but like, in a friendship way.

party pals, where they don’t talk that much outside of parties but inside them ?? super close. glued to the hip. hold-your-hair-back kinda tight.

frenemies ?? fake friends ?? toxic pals ?? ppl using her for her money or like, sex, or something ?? anything ??

bad influences ?? who just encourage all of saige’s shit ??

good influences ?? who are like YOINK stop being an idiot.

a tutor b/c she’s like…she’s smart, okay, but she’s also really stupid LMAO. she’s rly bad at math and science. somebody help her.

hook ups ?? fwbs ?? that one, rare one-night-stand that went weird ??

exes ?? she’s sorta noncommittal so idk how long they would’ve dated but like sjdfkbo yolo ?? ex hook-ups too ??

…somebody who just. hates her. but she doesn’t realize bc she’s a big ol’ idiot. she thinks theyre pals !!

let her b a thorn in someone’s side, just like, an absolute annoyance LMAO

gimme an enemy, or like an ex-best friend where something happened between them n it ruined their friendship

i will take literally anything i dont know

she steals ur character’s mail ?? ur cat keeps escaping and she keeps letting them inside even tho she’s allergic ??

one of those friendships where theyre always bickering like an old married couple ?? but it’s Purely Platonic (or is it ??)

an off-and-on again that just. it’s not good for either of them b/c they keep enabling each other and then getting pissed off and it’s a Mess but ?? it’s so hard to stop.

the drug dealer she keeps sleeping with even though she can just … pay for her shit. b/c it’s funner this way !

just … people where their like … relationship status is Blurred and it’s like, are they a thing? are they not? b/c she’s a mess and gets involved with too many people without intending to !

please. take her. give me connections.

[beblebumm]

lesbian mom

My sister told me I dress like a lesbian mom. With no offense meant towards lesbian mothers because as Chloe put it- if I was a lesbian mom, my style would be closer to cool. But because up to this point in life I have been straight and childless, I’m just an appropriator. Which I definitely don’t want to be by the way, but I'm an American and blind appropriation is the American way. Working on it. I’m in the kitchen in Cedar Falls finding all my last sporadic, traveled with items to shove in my XL backpack* by the time Chloe brings her new opinion up to her roommates, my family. “Cathy, don’t you think Maddie looks like a lesbian mom?” “a what? A lesbian? I didn’t hear you” ...and dad’s reaction: “oh.. did you get a surrogate then?” * (United and Frontier front like they will be strict about charging you based on the sizes of your luggage, but they won't be. Apparently my size of backpack does not count as a personal item (free) but instead a carry-on (not free). It's a glutinous excuse for a backpack. However, they don’t say shit to you when you show up on the day of your flight. In the words of my friend Grace: If it's on your back and not on wheels, you're fine. I have had to repack a backpack once, throwing on a sweatshirt and carrying socks in my hand to make it through. But you know what that was? Free.And Fyi- U.S. airlines alone made 5.1 billion bucks in extra baggage fees in 2018. Don't contribute to that mess.) * But anyways, to come to the defense of lesbian moms, I think I dress with the best intention. I don’t think I have bad taste, but I can have bad execution. It's not entirely my fault though, as I feel bigger boobs make a lot of outfits merge towards mother. Tops are always an issue because you have the possibility of looking tenty, and opposite that- the issue of looking too tucked in. It can make the attempted effortlessness come off as starchy. I also straddle this line of wannabe skater and NOT wannabe school teacher, meaning I would love to come across as someone who deserves to wear Vans and less like someone who is reading to your child over snack time. That one is harder to explain, but has a lot to do with stripes. I don't bother running all of this past her, but I told Chloe that if I was flat-chested she wouldn’t be saying this. She didn’t argue but offered to help pay for my reduction. My dad and I get in the car after I make an everything bagel with some onion flavored cream cheese. A Thomas brand bagel, of course. Because it’s the cushiest and you can find them everywhere. We love a processed carb. He drives me to the airport in his new-but-used Toyota Highlander, which doesn’t reek of cigs like his previous whip. He only likes this new car because it has a cassette player, but the low mileage is a plus. I just want to say that the Cedar Rapids airport is low entertainment. It’s a trade-off because you are through security in seconds, but you have to do things like chase after people to hand them their ID’s they left on the counter to help the employees out because we’re Iowa nice and when in the homeland you have to act right. And people wear really ugly printed leggings and foul footwear. Lots of camo and lots of Hawkeye logos, which I do not identify with despite it being my alma mater. I was caught in a very vulnerable spot with my thick and tall Doc Marten's, (not a good airport shoe but a good everyday shoe so what can you do) hunched over the ‘Get Your Shit Back Together Very Quickly Bench’ that comes after security, when I see this rushed looking, young nerd man in a long black trench coat. He LOUDLY and SO abruptly asks this similarly aged gal he was coming up behind whether her hair was red or blonde. She had long red hair with dyed blonde ends. She said “red?” and he says nothing but “HUMPH” without breaking speed at all. Why did he need to know that and also why could he not see that her hair was both colors? And if he cared so much to know, then why did he not respond? Did he think this was considered to be hitting on her?? Because practically yelling at her to inquire about her appearance is not cutting it. I wish for his sake I could at least call him a boomer but he didn't meet the age requirement. Whatever. She looked around for confirmation that what had just happened to her was so weird, which of course I gave to her by saying: “That was so weird.” The sole restaurant by the gates has Blue Moon so that’s redeeming. But it’s in a tin can which is not so good. I used to prefer a draft pour with an orange slice but I am partial to a cold bottle now, plain- no orange. It’s more consistent this way, as some places don’t clean their draft lines regularly and it shows. I met an icon on my flight today. I, of course, was assigned my usual middle seat as I am certain I paid the littlest amount of airfare out of everyone on the plane. Deals only. But as I step up to my row and make that apologetic eye contact with the dude who is about to have to move and let me assume my usual middle spot, the guy asks me if I want to switch spots with his son- WHO HAS AN AISLE SEAT. YEAH SIR, I DO. And this is how I was seated next to the only stranger I’ve had an extended conversation with on an airplane, ever. At least to the point where I was sure I wanted to be buddies with her. She was not stoked on the middle seat, but it’s the one she had in our row. The icon is named Erin and she said: “I’ve been ignoring people on planes for 20 years but you seem like an absolute riot.” I realized I also tend to spend a lot of time ignoring people on airplanes. I actually spend more time trying not to bother the people around me, aka holding urine in until I am nearly bursting because the awkward fumbling out of my usual middle seat is too much. I did, however, have slight banter with a guy sitting next to me on the way into Iowa from Denver on this same trip. All he wanted to say to me was that he had just been skiing in Vail or something. People love being able to say sentences like this, by the way. "Skiing in Vail". It's supposed to impress whoever they tell. Ok. But later on, he and I would exchange terrified eyes as we watched this awful moment unfold after an older fellow in the row across from us ignored all social rules and played his voicemails on full blast, speaker volume, for about 10 minutes. A young gentleman near us let him know that “We can all hear that!” which I would have never said but was also thinking. Obviously. The Voicemail Blarer says “Oh sorry” calmly but is very caught off guard. I thought- wow. That went well. But the Voicemail Blarer takes all of 30 seconds to stew before erupting. He belly yells that he is a “WAR VETERAN AND THAT IS WHY I CANNOT HEAR OUT OF THIS EAR WHICH IS WHY MY PHONE IS ON SPEAKER AND BY THE WAY IM ON THIS FLIGHT BECAUSE MY MOM JUST DIED AND I AM FLYING BACK TO IOWA FOR THE FUNERAL. PEOPLE LIKE YOU ARE AHHHHHHHHH KDFKSJDFLKJDFLJSDF”... I feel like the percentage of people flying to Iowa for funerals is probably a decent chunk. Either you're visiting your family or someone died. Just speculating. ANyways. The Mourning Vet Voicemail Blarer said some pretty harsh remarks towards the Complainer that I can’t remember because I was so nervous as a witness to this that my adrenaline was working overtime to suppress. I remember being proud of The Complainer as he kept very level and only said a couple words to defend himself followed by: “I’m sorry you’re going through that man but we don’t all need to hear your voicemails.” I see both sides of this interaction. On the younger Complainer dude’s side, it’s not socially courteous for the vet to be playing his voicemails out loud. Especially for ten minutes. I mean Larry David would have lost it. On the other hand, no one was insulting his status as a vet or poking fun at his late mother, but he has obviously been through more life and more challenges than I and plus he’s grieving. I don’t know. I didn’t mind the voicemails THAT much. Back to today- Erin is the second stranger I’ve met who inspired me this month. Technically this year, and technically this decade, too. Happy 2020. From what I saw, she’s a kick-ass, take no shit, lay it all on the table kind of individual. She had a natural openness about her and radiated warmness but is the type to probably gaurd herself just enough. The kind of person who you would hate to see sad. Born in cedar rapids, went to Iowa for Journalism, got her masters at Syracuse. Has lived all over- New York, London, LA (I think she said). Will not donate to her old sorority, Chi O, because she can’t affiliate with that anymore because it’s lame. But she’s loyal enough to one of her sorority besties to fly to Denver and sit with her while she undergoes a chemo treatment. She asks me about work and I say I have enough side hustles to equate to having a real job. She tells me I need a podcast and says I must have been told this before. I haven’t. But If I had one, I would have her guest star immedieately. She oozes content. Apparently, there’s such a thing as coaching people on how to talk on camera because this is her job. It can be split up into different categories based on the size of the screen. Phone, computer, TV, etc. She kept saying things about “inches”. I thought this was wildly specific, exactly the sort of job you wouldn’t think about until you thought about it. Niche. Hopefully future me is doing something niche right now. But only if I'm enjoying it. She also mentioned some clients she has that I should speak to so I can learn how to travel the world for free. I could have clung to her and never let go after she said this, as that would make my life and her encouragement inspired me. Before this though, we agree I need a credit card that rewards with airline miles instead of cashback. It’s third up on my “to-do now” list- which is different than my “to-do” list becasue that one is for things like making dentist appointments. For the things that should not be put off but can and will be. Until they can't. She asks what my sign is, which is Sagittarius. She said of course. She’s a Virgo. I have no clue what this means. People ask me this sort of thing a lot now though so I need to read up. This guy I met recently who works at Wax Trax Records told me not only extensively about my sign but about my rising moon and one other part of it that I can’t remember. Or is it your rising sign and moon sign as separates? Idk. He told me that every girl he knows has an ex-boyfriend who is a Pisces. True. Erin also told me she’s on some board in Iowa City that is currently discussing the ped mall. I had a lot to say about THAT, as I feel the ped mall has turned into wasted space other than maybe one and a half shops. She agrees. It’s not being utilized like it should be, we think. Too many frat bars. Apparently, her family owns the Bluebird cafes or used to, and I said "ooooooooh!" but that I could never get a seat in the Iowa City location because every hungover kid within a ten mile radius is trying to eat there every Saturday and Sunday morning. I also thought of the time they burned my friend Madison Wood’s toast and she sent it back. I didn’t tell her this though. I like Bluebird. And I hate when people at my table complain about the food. She tells me I'm too good to write for random freelances, which I have dipped my toes into doing. Pays like shit. I agree and listen to her tell me about someone she met when she was just one year sober (she is now ten years along) who pushed her to take charge of her own point of view. It sounded to me like she was inspired to trust and invest in herself. I liked that. As if I needed another excuse to stay out of corporate America. Right before she fell into meditation and soon to be sleep, Erin comments on my middle part and my “nice natural eyebrows” which is funny because I helped the brows out right before going through security. (By helped out, I mean makeup-ed. In the airport bathroom, too far away from the mirror, two different pencils- one chubby for careless shading and one skinnier to help the endpoints of my brow that is otherwise dead.) On the topic of my appearance, I tell her that my sister had just told me that I dress like a lesbian mother. She said she loves my sister.

[autumnpawtribe]

Life is crazy.

I'm still recovering from almost dying.  

I haven't written much in a while, life just went a bit insane.  I would not say it went to shit, but it was a bit crazy. I figured I would write the highlights, I expect my children may one day read this.

Now, this was the day my brother, Venyabi, took the mother of my child as a mate, for she accepted him, and he her.  He loved her. This was… I dealt with it.

***********************************

Xiao and Janaret had a small… interlude in the shower the morning after we have saved his Mother and younger sister from the demons they called Father and his little minion that Naddja was married to.  Now, My Janaret is very submissive, and he is what some would call my little. I take care of him, we have times where we spend time together and I braid his hair, or we just spend time cuddling. It makes me happy to take care of him, and he is happy knowing someone will take care of him when he cannot handle life.  He’s doing much better now that our friend, Talrethriel Shadethorn, has given him oils made of Shimmerweed to help him with his anxiety.  

After their time in the shower, which I often remind them took FOREVER...

*************************

After their shower and Xiao lead Aret out, the prelate didn't speak, only nodded as he led Xiao back into the room to find clothing.  "Um.. Xiao?" He had turned an interesting shade.. "What do I wear?"

Xiao blinked, looking back at him as he pulled on his red and black house kimono, though he put on his black cloth pants from the night before on underneath as well for decency, since he'd only worn then for all of 20 minutes. "What do you mean? You have clothes here, don't you?"

"I.. um.."

"Would you just fuckin' pick clothes for him.  Tarja is whining, Im hungry, and People are actually wanting to TALK to you two.  I only have So many topics of conversation that are not stories from when Aret was little.  There is a green kilt with Gold trim, and a green vest. Put that on."  Vol poked his thoughts into Xiao’s.  "He wants you to choose for him so he looked good for you..  first impression on his mother. Remember, he is submissive, he likes a bit of guidance.  Today it is from you." 

Xiao lit up when he realized what Aret wanted. He leaned over and kissed him. "Here love, come here." He took Aret's hand and pulled him to his closet. He pulled out several things for the prelate, looking them over before finally finding the piece that he thought was just right. It was an understated black tunic with crimson stitching that hung low enough to accentuate his muscled features without looking overtly revealing, tapering down to be more form fitting around his abdomen. It was a V cut down to about his navel, but for Troll standards it was a 'dressy' vest compared to something loose like what Vol would usually wear that was more two strips of fabric with a string to keep it from flapping in the wind. He made sure to get matching pants, glad to find they were a matching set, similar crimson threading lining the sides and hips. They weren't tight enough to bulge in the groin, but close knit enough to hug his muscled thighs and accentuate his form. He bit his lip, swaying in spot a bit before reaching back to unbraid Aret's hair and pull it over his front to all drape down one shoulder on his chest. He grinned, blushing a little before moving Aret in front of a mirror so they could stand side by side. The colors made sense now, it complimented Xiao's kimono so that the two would look absolutely lovely together. Also it would come as no surprise to Vol that Xiao had Aret's hair down, they likely both knew by now he loved it like that.

Janaret smiled, blushing but happy as he stood in front of the mirror and looked at his reflection. "Thank you.  S.. Sometimes Vol'raka will choose for me. That's part of .. our special things we do. I want to make sure Muuka likes you."  He stood up straight, experimentally flipped his hair, and put a hand out. "I will make you proud, and She'll like you. I know she will."

Xiao nearly squee'ed at the hair flip, clearly adoring it. "You look absolutely gorgeous." He leaned up to kiss Aret lovingly before offering his hand. "I am always proud of you, Ba'la... shall we head down?"

Aret nodded, a hand on Xiao's as he led him out of the bedroom and downstairs.  There was the deep voiced laugh of a Darkspear, Nielka making faces at Zakin and Tarja, the tiny troll girl giggling and bouncing in her hammock.  Pahre was sitting quietly, with a soft smile and Naddja was.. not there.

"Where is Naddja?"

"Ja sistah had a visitah an’ went fer a walk.  Ja two finally join us, da bacon an eggs be cold, but dere some muffins left.  Da pancakes be gone. Ja snooze ja loose." Vol grinned, finally having given up on his mates and eating his own breakfast.  "Xiao, aftah breakfast. Kyl need ta come out an finish dat house. Auntie, Naddja, and Nielka need dey own space."

Xiao's smile dropped when he heard 'visitah'. "Who showed up?" He asked nervously, almost as if he forgot he killed the two people they had to worry about. "You can find the stone in my brewing room if you want to just reach out to him for me, Vol." He said with a small smile, though still worried.

"His name was Venyabi.  Muuka, I like human food.  Muffin? Right?" Nielka was holding up what looked like a muffin, studded with blueberries.  "I want to learn to cook. Vol'raka, I want to learn how to make muffins.." Though still scarred, the girl knew she was safe where she was and had already perked up and liked her new home.  Her mother was more subdued, more years of pain still lingering and lining her face.

"Please do not bother them with trivialities, Nielka.  We are guests, I am sure that they have other matters."  The look on her face spoke volumes as she tended to her grandson, She was afraid still, and did not wish to antagonize.

"Auntie et be fine.  Ah gotta go ta take care of a mage and make sure he finish da work, but ah also gonna be sendin' Hae an Aret ta get some clothes fer ja.  Fabric at leas'. Hae be a good seamstress an Naddja's clothes not quite fit ja. Anothah day, ah teach ja ta make muffins. Xiao a bettah cook den me.  We be takin' turns wit da chores." He smiled as he turned to Aret and Xiao, noticing they matched. "Ja look handsome with ja haiah down, sweetheart. Suits ya."  he stood, clearing his plate and giving Aret and Xiao both kisses. "Ah gonna talk ta Kyl. Eat. Be good hosts."

"Ones that are not upstairs caterwauling their lusts in the shower..."

Xiao smiled and nodded, seeming relaxed again. "Your brother stopped by? Just to say hello or for business?" He asked casually as he sat beside Aret and reached to nibble on a muffin himself. "Nielka, I would love to teach you how to cook muffins if you would like that." He said warmly, speaking the Zandali after Aret or Vol translated for him as they had been since the night before. "You do not have to worry about bothering us, Pahre. Aret is family and you are Aret's family. That makes you our family. Family is never a bother, hm?"

"Venya come ta see Naddja....". He didn't sound thrilled, but let it go as the twelve year old squealed happily. 

"I want to learn!  I..."

"Nielka, calm child.  We will stay out of your way and be no bother.". 

"Muuka... Stop it." Aret and Vol turned as Naddja and his elder brother Venyabi came back in, the druid scowling.  "They are nothing like father. They welcome you into their home. They welcome us. We get to start again without Father's rules, pain....  All the things he inflicted upon us. Let Nielka learn things. It doesn't mean they are gonna make her get married! It means she learns skills.  This family works together. So she'll have chores, just as I do, I expect you as well..."

Vol interrupted, actually smiling at Naddja, switching to Zandali and translating in his head for Xiao.  The Link worked wonders for it.  

"She is right, Auntie. No need to hide in the room upstairs.   Enjoy the grounds, spend time as you will. Once you settle in,there are things we may ask.  Most importantly, I ask that you try and be happy. Find something that makes you happy.". Vol smiled kissing Xiao, Aret and Tarja in turn.  "These make me happy."

Xiao looked as though he were about to speak when Naddja came back in and spoke up. He sat quietly, letting the family talk before leaning up to kiss Vol with a small smile. "You are safe here, you can be free here. That is all. Asking us for things, spending time... it is not a bad thing. You do not have to worry anymore."

Pahre looked in her lap, noticing only when her son moved to sit next to her.  "Muuka, this is home. A family. Everyone here is family."

"What et be ja fear, Auntie?". Vol stood next to Xiao, relaxed and smiling gently as he looked at the similar blue eyes as his lover. 

Pahre sighed.  "I must remember, Torcali forgive me, that I can know something more than fear.  I fear this place is too open and honest, that something will shatter."

"Auntie, dis place not perfect, but we try ta get along.  Et not easy ta be en a relationship wit three, and all da rest.  Gotta work at et."

"It took me a while to get used to it too. Vol'raka helped me find happiness through that openness. It may take time, but you can let yourself finally be happy. There will be no pain here."

"Ah takin' Naddja ta mate." 

Aret, Pahre, and Vol'raka turned looking at Venyabi, Naddja facepalming. "Way to go, Venya."

Vol crossed his arms, not territorial, more annoyed as Aret stared at his sister.  Even Pahre was wide eyed.

"You...  Are the new baby's father?". 

"Ah gonna be....". Venya was stopped by Vol grabbing him by the scruff and dragging him outside, Naddja following.

"Entertain them... Talk.  I'm gonna rip my brother a new ass."

"Uhhh..." He blinked, kind of just staring. When Vol yanked Venya out, he just kind of watched. "... I want to know what happens, you better leave that link open." He offered a nervous little chuckle. "Who wants breakfast dessert crepes, hm?" Yes, more cooking, that would be a good distraction.

Nielka was distracted, hopping up to follow Xiao.  "Can I watch?!"

~~~~~

"Are you serious, Venya.  I knew you were fucking, by fucking Bwonsamdi you've known each other for...a few weeks!"

"She doesn't.... Mind my...  You know. Most people are not ok with it, lil bruddah."

"It's not your choice, Vol'raka."

"Naddja, think of what I am seeing.  The woman who ... Let's just say it. The woman who raped me and had my kid is fucking my brother.  Now mating my brother and going to probably have his children..."

"And you are fucking my brother...."

~~~~~

Xiao smiled at Nielka. "Of course, come here." He extended an arm out and began to prepare all of the ingredients, explaining it all to her as he listened through the link. "She cannot hear, but... us being with Aret is irrelevant, none of us did anything /wrong/. She did. Not that I hold a grudge, but... her point is not a good one."

~~~~~

"I am.  So what.  Did you tell my brother what you did to me.  How my daughter was conceived?"

"...  Yes."

"I still love her, Vol.  She actually accepts me."

"And her children?  You wander, Venya. You don't stay in one place.  How are you going to keep wandering."

Naddja got in Vol’s face, a finger right on his nose.  "We will wander too! You don't get input into my life, you are not my caretaker nor my father.  You promised to protect me until I found someone. I found someone. I will follow all the rules, I won't be called Tarja's mother, I pitch in and do my part.  So butt out of this."

Aret spoke up, quietly.  *"Let her be happy too."

"If you hurt Venyabi, I will not forgive you.  I will be letting it go, but I hope you can understand why I am upset about this.  You can stay here for a while Venya. Same deal. Pitch in."

~~~~~

Xiao listened in silence, sighing lightly as he tried to keep up a straight face as he showed Nielka how the delicate pastry was made. "So she is going to just... wander. That means Zakin will to. I thought she would want her children to know each other. Maybe I was naive in thinking she would just live here with us in her own little quarters so Tarja could grow up around /all/ of her family..." He sounded a tad disheartened as he finally chipped in, like his fantasy had been shattered a little. 

"perhaps.. if you talk..to her Aret?  I do not know Venyabi well?"

~~~~~

Vol had shut down and stalked off, still there but silent as he had left Venya and Naddja alone to come back in.

"Mango Mon, what a makin?". He was not looking at crepes.  He was looking at the stew pot. It smelled far different from a sweet breakfast.

~~~~~

"I do not know either of them well..." He said uncertainly, his gaze pulling to Venya now. The nickname made him smile again, putting the finishing touches on the crepes and putting some powdered sugar on top. "These? They are pastries and-..." It was then that he followed Venya's line of sight and cleared his throat. "That is nothing, just... something Vol'raka is making." He tried to sound casual but he was about as stiff as a board now, anxious panda. He didn't want any attention drawn to that pot. 

Venya sniffed, picked up the lid and wafted away the steam.  "Da fuck ja got troll hearts en a pot fer?"

Aret's face fell and he paled, hoping his mother and younger sister had not heard Venya.  thankfully Pahre was enamored with spending time with her playful grandson and granddaughter, who was inspecting her fingers.  "It is Vol'raka's dinner, please leave it alone."

Naddja scowled, then sighed.  "Bwonsamdi."

Venya made an "ooooooooohhhhh" looking face and closed the lid.  "Ah serve da grave too sometimes, ah get et. Ah not sure mah bruddah happy bout mah fallin' fer Naddja.

Xiao tried to stop him but it was too late. When Venya spoke about it, his mouth fell agape and he looked horrified. He hurried Nielka off to serve the crepes and then spoke in a low but 'angry' whisper so only Vena, Aret, and Naddja could hear once Nielka was out of earshot. "What is wrong with you! If there are Troll hearts stewing, you do not just ask like you would ask about the weather! Sweet Celestials... That poor woman has been through enough, they both have." He gave Venya a disapproving look, scolding him like the Ba he was. He then realized he had just scolded his future brother in law and bit his lip. "Sorry, I just... do not want Pahre and Nielka to have to go through anything more than they already have." He murmured, low still so the other two wouldn't hear.

"Ja lived with Vol dis long an’ he not brought home 'dinnah'?  He respectin' JA culture more den his own lil bruddah. Let da old lady be blissful an unaware.. or jus be blind ta et fer 'er own sake.  Ja not gotta be yellin' at me bout et. Et not mah sacrifice ta be eatin'."

Aret turned his head upstairs and wandered out, heading for the office Vol kept inside the house, almost like he was called.  Naddja watched her brother wander off, turning to Xiao. "Vol doesn't want me here, does he?"

Xiao sighed heavily, whispering to Venyabi now. "They are her hearts of her son by marriage and her husband. There is a reason I told you to shh. It is not the fact that they are offerings to Bwonsamdi, it is who the offerings ARE." He then huffed a little. "Also, do not talk about us not respecting his culture? Who do you think helped me prepare the sacrifice?." He grumbled under his breath mildly.  “I doubt we would have been met with the presence of the Loa of Graves if we were paying that little attention... Talk about making my heart race in minor panic." He grumbled again and sighed, realizing he said that out loud, hoping no one heard. He cleared his throat and welcomed Naddja's question, looking to her with a shake of her head. "It is not that he does not want you here. I think... the fact that he lets you near Tarja, lets you live in our home, as family... is trying to him. It takes patience. You have to remember, Naddja... at the end of the day, regardless of what circumstances you were under at home, you raped him. Did you know he does not drink anymore? He hardly even smokes. He refuses almost any intoxicants now ever since that incident. So to have the patience and restraint to let you live under his roof with our child and even getting to be in her life... then find out you are going to go wandering off with his brother? There are limitations to how much someone can put up with. Yes, he is also with your brother, but... we went into that situation with no idea who he was to you. The fact that you two are related is a sheer twist of incredibly unexpected fate. It is not as if he went after him knowing he was your brother. Even if he had, he was not the one who did the wrong but was the one wronged himself. So think of this from his perspective. He shows you the leniency and mercy and kindness to not only forgive you, but invite you and your family in, let you in our daughter's life, reunite you with your son... take care of certain issues so you never have to worry about safety again. All of that, and now he finds out that after everything he has done, you decide to possibly flit off with his brother. It is... salt in the wound. A wound that is still incredibly fresh to him." He sighed quietly, looking down at the kitchen floor as he contemplated his next words.

"I know that... I want you here, believe it or not. I thought that you would live here with us, Pahre and Nielka too. You would have your own quarters, a separate little area through portal magic, but... still in reach. Our own... tribe, if you will. Tarja gets aunts, uncles, grandmothers... a brother, though she will know him as a cousin and vice versa. Your son would get to grow up with a big loving family, no one would be in danger, and..." He shook his head, trailing off again. "It sounds idealistic, but I just thought... I guess I hoped you would stay here, all of you would. Aret is our family, so that makes you family. I had hoped we could be family... together."

Naddja looked chastised and sighed as Venya put an arm around her shoulders.  "Ah.. ah know what happen. We agree et not right, we agree da lil ones be needin' ta be raised tagetha, lil bruddah.  Et gonna be up to Vol'raka. He forgivin' but ah tink tings hurt em more den he lettin' on. We close, but ...."

"Xiao Chun.  Vol'raka is speaking with Kylendris.  He would like to speak to you, once he is done."  Aret came back in, having not heard Venya speaking.  "He is trying to fix the hole in the wall..."

Xiao frowned a little. "I know it is, but he is trying to keep us all together for the sake of our daughter. He wants her to be with as much family as she can. He just needs time and you two getting together is something that adds more strain to his already stressed load than he anticipated." He then looked back at Aret and nodded. "I was wondering when he was going to reach out to him." He said casually before reaching out through the link. "Hole?" He sighed internally, trying to hide his disappointment. "Do you think it is okay if I go in to see him now? Can you entertain?" He said with a glance toward those still in the kitchen and dining area. 

"Nienie...  let me show you how to fold the crepes?  Venyabi, we are not so close, and I would bet you do not know my mother, nor younger sister.  I would like to learn more of you, as you will be with my sister?" Aret smiled, hiding his worry.  "He broke his hand."

~~~~

Vol was healing his hand, misjudging his aim and having hit a section of stone.  The wall only had a small dent. The mage would finish his work and the rest of the family would get their space and he could ...  normal was not going to happen, he shouldn't delude himself.

Xiao hurried into the office, frowning as he saw Vol tending to his hand. "What happened...?" He asked worriedly, inching closer to Vol as he peered at him with a worried little whimper.

Vol looked up, grinning even if it did not meet his eyes.  "Just breaking my hand, lamenting that I let Venya come visit a few weeks ago, having Tarja's conception rubbed into my face, feeling like I can't save everyone and my kindness is tossed in my face like mud?  Nothing major lover. How are you?"  He flexed his hand as he stood up, putting Xiao's stone on the desk.  “He'll have it all finished by tomorrow. I need to send Hae and Aret off to get supplies, I need to feed the raptors.. I need to get shit done today.."  He instead sat in his chair and let his head fall on the desk.

Xiao's frown deepened, moving over to sit in Vol's lap and force his head off the desk and onto his fuzzy chest instead. "Vol'raka... hey, look at me." He murmured, trying to make Vol look up at him so he could gently kiss him on the noise before nuzzling against a tusk. "What do you mean thrown in your face? ... Who could you not save? I know you are hurting, but talk to me, please?" The upgrades from Kyl could wait until later, he was more concerned about Vol. 

"Ah get hurt..  ah get an unexpected kid, ah forgive, ah forget, ah do all ah can ta make people happy.  Killin' again, make sure ever' one be safe. Try to make so ouah lil girl be given a good family, all who love 'er, even ef ah gotta see ... er ever' day.  Now.. et be 'ey, we gonna go travelin'. Ah done ever'tin' ah could so dis can be a family, even ef et hurt me... an' now..." Vol sighed, defeated.

Xiao nodded in understanding, leaning in to hug Vol. "I told Naddja and Venyabi the same thing. Venyabi said that they will not be wandering. I already said they need to be here with their family. Zakin deserves to be with his sister, even if he it is raised as cousin. After all Pahre and Nielka have gone through, they should have their whole family, all the family that matters at least." He nuzzled into Vol's neck, trying to comfort him. "Venyabi said that the kids need to be raised together but... you accepting Naddja is going to be on you. I promptly told them that they are the ones who need to give you time. After everything... Venyabi being involved on top of it, I know it has to be overwhelming."

“I don't know if I can."  He left it at that, holding Xiao around the shoulders, chin resting on his love's head.  "I have tried.  I have tried so hard to forget.  To give up my hatred, to give her a chance.  All I see is the day she found me in Zandalar and told me she was carrying my kid.  I had nightmares... I think I still do...."

Xiao whimpered quietly, hugging Vol tighter. "Can I help...?"

"I don't know.."  He lifted his head, plastering on a smile.  "Just keep going..  all I can do, you, Aret, Tarja.  Need me to get over it."

Xiao shook his head. "No... hey... please, do not do that." He whimpered quietly, pressing his forehead against Vol's. "Don't pretend for me, I want my Vol, not some mask."

"Da mask be ta survive, Xiao Chun.  Et ta not explode." He looked over at the smallish hole in the wall.  “Not doin' such a good job hmm?”

Xiao shook his head again. "No... we promised honesty, remember?" He murmured nervously, trying to hug his Vol tighter

"Lie of Omission is still a lie.  I am TRYING hard to not snap at her.  I agreed to let her stay, for you, Aret, Tarja to have SOME relationship with her.  Killed her father, and that good for nothing man of her's... Even if it killed me to do so.  My family needs her, and she's gonna go run off with my brother.. make the two children she cares for wander too."  He was angry, almost shaking, but his voice was dead calm.

Xiao pulled back, looking at Vol. "They are staying, remember? Venyabi said they deserve to be raised together, meaning they will stay... I told him, they need to be together. They agreed."

"That's fine, I just....  I need our space, Xiao. I can't keep having Naddja in my face.  I want nights back where It's just you, me, Aret, and Tarja. A quiet meal with just my mates, our children.  If it was not a very bad time to do so, I would head to Jade Forest. Pack the four of us up and just go for a week.  Can't DO that. So that elf is going to come here, finish the job and Naddja, Venya, all of them get their OWN house. I want OUR house back.  I want to be able to fuck you on the kitchen table when I FEEL LIKE IT."  the last part was not meant as a joke.

Xiao blushed a little, nodding and cuddling into Vol. "I miss that openness, too. We can have Nielka, Venya, Pahre, Zakin, and Naddja all in their own home with the four of us being here. I originally had thought they could a separate set of rooms through a portal, but... an entirely different house would probably be better. That way we can have family dinners if we want while still having our privacy. Are we going to construct a base house so Kyl can create the portal setup or is this just going to be... a hidden portal outside that they walk into like a front door?"

The big troll sat back, sighing.  "Dunno, dun care.  I was our space back.  I'm going to be going with Hae to get supplies.  I was going to send Aret, but I need out of the house.   I'm going to actually meditate first."  He smirked at Xiao, kissing his nose.  "My Master taught me how, I think I need to right now.   I'll fix the wall later. I just. I cannot have her in my face all the time.  I need time to heal the wound, all I am asking. And maybe being able to bend my husbands over Where I want to....." 

"Well, just having a portal placed against a rock or something would be much more... instantly available where if we want an indoors place with the portals inside, that would require us to build the actual base structure first. If we just do a portal inlaid into a tree or something, it can be done in a day or two probably." He said as he nuzzled against Vol's neck. "Can I help at all? Can I do anything? I really wish I could help."

"Make the pain stop."  It was all he said as he curled around his love.  "I want no more reminders.  I want to look at my Loves and be happy, I want to look at my daughter and not think on .. what happened.  Forgive me if I run away from it for a day?"

"You do not have to be sorry for not wanting to think about being raped..." He whispered with a quiet whimper. "You are so strong, Vol'raka... to show as much kindness as you do. I am so proud of you." He stood up and offered Vol his hand. "Come on, we are going to run off for the day. Aret can entertain the family. You and I are going to have some time just for us, okay? Like things are normal like before. Just us, no distractions, no painful memories... just each other, okay?"

"It looks really bad if we just bail, Xiao Chun."

Xiao chuckled a little. "Kyl is my contact, it would make sense if you took me with you so I can make sure you get the right things?" He suggested as he offered his hand still, hopeful.

"Lover..."  He left the link, whispering in Xiao's ear.  "We wont make et ta Halfhill or da Shrine. Ah will take you to the jungle and I WILL have you.  on ja back, moanin' fer me, hearin' only MAH name on my lips. Until Ah hear.. "Fuck me Vol'raka.  Breed mah body, fill me....", be et screamed or whispered. And Ah will GLADLY do so.... Nothin' gonna get done dat way."

He grabbed Vol's hand and tugged "We are going, /now/." He practically moaned, trying to tug him out of the office and out on their little adventure.

*******************************

We have an active love life...

[queeranarchist]

uhhh every 5th q for the ask meme?

:O

5) What was the first time you suspected you were transgender?

uhhh first time i remember was when I cut my hair off - for an SPN Lucifer cosplay of all things - and was like hell yeah I look like a dude! Radical! and then was like oh that is not a very CisThought™️

10) What have your experiences with packing or wearing breast forms been?

you know i bought a pretty expensive packer and it was waaay too large despite being one of the smaller ones of that model - this was apparently a problem a lot of guys had and their were videos on how to cut it to make it fit but it cost a lot and i was too worried about ruining it - anyway i moved house three and a half times in six months and my stuff is currently in between two houses and I have No Idea where it is and in the back of my mind there is the constant fear that someone will find that dick 

15) What labels have you used before you’ve settled on your current set?

i’ve used pretty much every label sexuality wise bc attraction is weird. gender wise i ided as a trans man until last yearish and now im just like im queer in all senses

20) What do you wish you could have shared with your younger self about being trans?

prooobably a lot of gender abolitionist stuff like meets past self and just holds a reading group of Nobody Passes by Matt Sycamore - like i hate the transmed/truscum view point but i see that a lot of it is pushed by 15 year old trans guys and the whole wanting to be cis/as close to cis as possible and you can have pride in being LGB but not in being trans thing is pretty much how i experienced gender until last year where i was like time to make the Conscious effort to rework my thoughts, i didnt end up in the dysphoria discourse largely bc it wasnt a big thing when i first realised i was trans (lmao no trans issues were big things at that point) - in general i’d want to get myself to work on a more intersectional approach in terms of understanding that the gender binary is a western colonialist construct and that capitalism pushes queerphobia by wanting to minamalise community reliance and further their profit by pushing a nuclear child producing way of structuring relationships - basically get little me to turn all that angst and anger @ the system

25) What do you wish cis people understood?

that they arent the end goal, i detest the view they have that trans people should be glad to be told that they look like a “”””real”””” women/man - also that they dont need to understand, i dont give a flying fuck if they dont get how someone can identify differently to their assigned gender/be nonbinary/have a gender that changes, just use the right pronouns and name and be ya’know a decent person - and! that they dont need to know what “makes” someone trans and that that line of thinking veers dangerously towards eugenics

30) Who is the transgender person who has influenced you the most?

ahhh good question - i realised i was trans in a pre Caitlyn Jenner pre Orange is the New Black era so a lot of it was just me figuring out shit on my own - which gotta say wasnt necessarily a bad thing bc more visibility has also lead to more bulshit

I would probably say Matt Sycamore - the first book i read that was edited by her was Why are Faggots so Afraid of Faggots and like the queer radicalism and like anarchy from that helped me figure out and voice some of my disquiet with queer assimilation stuff and also the big We Won the marriage campaign queer stuff is Done mood that was 2017 after Australia’s same sex marriage plebiscite. her book Nobody Passes which focuses purely on gender stuff also follows a similar vein and its very very good

35) How do you feel your gender interacts with your race, disability, class, weight, etc. from the perspective of intersectionality?

outside of queer stuff i fit into a pretty privileged life, defs gonna say class played a major noticeable role in being able to get hormones despite having to go through a whole court process (pretty sure the government being the Worst to baby me is what made me an anarchist) and get top surgery pretty quickly once out of high school, my whiteness also provides a certain protection when you see the much higher rates of violence at trans POC, and I'm also able to access queer events and spaces without having to consider accessibility etc

40) How did/do you manage waiting to transition?

mmmm honestly at the time it was the worst and looking back on it i am still very angry and bitter at both my school and, you know, the government in general

i did the whole im trans use the right name and pronouns @ the school people (with my parents there so they couldnt use that as an excuse) about nine months before they started doing so AND this was also after my parents flat out ignoring that I was trans for months before that and i did not uuhhh deal well with any of that mentally At All. my school was pretty much like yll be bullied we cant as if every kid i interacted with didnt already know - and when they eventually did it wasnt a big deal with kids - i only heard second hand about some shit that was said about me which gotta admit was kinda laughable bc i had people i barely knew tell me what people in my grade had said and i was like….dont know who that is but Okay - i was too out of the gossip loop to have anything to be upset about 😂 also i had two (2) teachers in the entire school that used the correct pronouns despite me fully out for near three years by the time i left school tho i didnt actually recognise how bad that was for me until i left high school and was like ???? dont want to die all the time ?? what is this

medically was also bulshit bc the australian system used to have anyone under 18 have to go through court to get HRT, it took me nearly three years and was incredibly fucked and even tho the laws been changed now i am still ready to throw down with whoever implemented it in the first place even tho their probably old and close to death themselves

ANYWAY in terms of providing a better answer than i didnt and was v sad and angry for a v long time - i surrounded myself with queer people, i ventured into the city for some youth queer groups, went to a camp purely for young queer people, read a lot of books about trans people etc 

Ask me questions ~

http://queeranarchist.tumblr.com/post/183686207345/datgenderqueerboi-trans-ask-game-what-has

[artcanary]

1-50

oh my god dude 

im gonna put this under a cut bc this is a lot. this is a ride, have fun i guess

1. Your first OC ever?god. its got to be Super Kitty. when i was like … an incredibly small child I used to draw comic strips about this feline caped crusader, who was friends with everyone in the city, and the comics always involved him stopping an evil banana man from stealing money from the local bank. He was paid with donuts for his service to the city. i still remember how to draw him. 

2. Do you have a personal favourite among your OCs?i’d get arrested if I didn’t answer this with Bronze, probably… but really, they’re very important to me

3. Have you ever adopted a character or gotten a character from someone else?man, i cant remember! i really dont think i have… P:

4. A character you rarely talk about?there’s loads of characters ive never even posted a single picture of on tumblr, i wouldnt even know where to start asdf

5. If you could make only one of your OCs popular/known, who would it be? bronze is the easy answer, but… i guess that could also go to Servant or Westrin. Servant has a comic project in the works that basically stars him, sort of a series of one-shots about the things he’s experienced, i feel like that would be a good thing to take off and run with. Westrin’s just fun as hell, i love the guy.

6. Two OCs of yours that look alike despite not being related?real talk now… there’s at least five different characters that i refer to as a whole as “bronze-tangential”, who started out as, “what would bronze be like if they were in this world?” and then becoming their own thing within said world because i just get stupid attached 

its an epidemic

7. Are your OCs part of any story or stories?nearly all of them, actually. that’s the main reason i make characters, after all! too many to really go into specifics here, again P: 

8. Do you RP as any of your OCs? If you do, introduce one of your RP OCs here!not often, but i think Bronze and Westrin are the most common ones. unless playing a character in dnd, or running an npc in dnd counts… then a whole lot more hahaha

9. Would you ever be willing to give any of your OCs to someone else?it depends on the circumstances. i don’t really like the idea, though. 

10. Introduce an OC with a complicated design? Westrin’s old getup is a pain to draw, and there was one other design i did that I cant find anywhere… whichever way, i dont often tend to draw super complicated things often 

a couple fakemon ive designed though… heheh those can get pretty finicky

11. Is there any OC of yours you could describe as a “sunshine”? hmmmmmmmm my immediate thought was Eric Silverdale from a comic i was working on a few years ago. hes a darling, i want him to be my friend irl

12. Name an OC that isn’t yours but who you like a lothow could you do this to me i love each and every one of all my friends ocs GOD the first one who comes to mind is @d20-official‘s Smith, whos Bronze’s friend… everyone in that DND party actually

13. Do you have any troublemaker OCs? Rated on a scale from “harmless” to “honestly somewhat frightening”: -Baromet (charming and quite friendly but definitely a kleptomaniac),-Westrin (demigod of bards and travelers), -XEN09 (a nonsense hacker), -Conny (needlessly contrarian and dumb as HELL), -Enza Colie (long fucking story but hes a good-for-nothing), -Hemlocke (mad scientist, chaotic evil), -Iris (AI and hacker, VERY bad), -The Terminus (glitch-in-the-matrix demon, chaotic evil), -and Sydd (the Queen of the Faeries, hopefully the danger there needs no explaining :’D)

14. Introduce an OC with a tragic backstory Mmm… there’s a few of them, most obviously Lent (whose background I did a short comic about). Basically his entire town got eaten by ghosts and turned into zombies, he only barely survived with a sliver of his soul left. 

15. Do you like to talk about your OCs with other people?yes, i often discuss storylines and such with friends

16. Which one of your OCs would be the best at biology (school subject)? Probably Bronze’s dad! I don’t talk about him much, but his name’s Devon Reed, and he was a biotech developer specialising in android design. 

I often describe him as being something of a reverse Arthur Weasley - a very fatherly scientist fascinated to the moon and back with the concept of magic. 

17. Any OC OTPs? having trouble thinking of a lot of them right now, but there’s Eric + Lent & Naiadine + Tailias from Emerald Sigil, Avken + Baromet from my space campaign world, Sydd + Wyvv from my unnamed campaign world, and I’ve been considering Westrin + Servant as an interesting dynamic in Servant’s story

18. Any OC crackships? My character Bismuth and @autistictimeknight​‘s oc Eros. Theyre so fucking in love, I love it. Its been awhile but I do still think about them sometimes.

As I recall, Eros is an empath, she can read other people’s emotions. But Bismuth is a robot, and Eros can’t read her. Because of this Eros can let go of her fear of unintentionally manipulating the emotions of her date, which would hold her back from most other relationships. 

19. Introduce an OC that means a lot to you (and explain why)Hey, meet Bronze! I definitely do not talk about them every five minutes, why would you say that. 

Bronze was with me through two of the hardest years of my life so far, and being a DND character they grew with me, both as a fighter and as a person. They were non-binary before I started using those pronouns, they were the first character or person or anything who I fought someone about using the right pronouns for, they make a great icebreaker for if I want to see how someone reacts to non-binary pronouns … 

One funny anecdote about Bronze is that when I first made them, their “gimmick” was that they would sometimes glitch out and mess up their speech, mostly because I wanted an excuse not to engage in the roleplaying (which I was very bad at). The interesting thing is that as I got better at interacting with the group, we both grew out of needing it very quickly. 

I’m very proud of Bronze. 

20. Do any of your OCs sing? If they sing, care to share more details (headcanon voice, what kind of songs they like etc)?Westrin is a bard! His singing voice sounds like Bill Wurtz and these are his theme songs.

21. Your most artistic OCProbably Westrin again, he writes a lot of songs… and Hallux is a game designer?

22. Is there any OC of yours people tend to mischaracterize? If yes, how? I honestly dont know… no-one talks to me about them, haha! 

people use all manner of pronouns for bronze, though. 

23. Introduce OC that has changed from your first idea concerning what the character would be like?I’m gonna go with Enza for this one. Enza Colie was originally written entirely because I wanted an antagonist for a short starring his sister, Jane Colie. But the more I fleshed out his reasonings for acting how he did and explored his character, the more I realised he’d make an even more interesting character if allowed to have a redemption arc, too. 

I just want to state for the record that I was very reluctant to the idea, and he basically dragged his way out of the villain pit entirely of his own accord. I am dubiously proud of him, and also a bit scared. 

24. If you could meet one OC of yours, who would it be and why?Probably either Eric (Big Man, Best Friend), Crocus (Mother figure), Reed (Father Figure), Westrin (hed just make a good friend u kno??), or Bismuth (she makes good conversation!)

25. The OC that resembles you the most (same hobby, height, shared like/dislike for something etc?)probably the homestuck fan-troll Hallux, but that’s mostly because they were based on a troll-sona I made awhile ago. They’re a hope/prospit game designer who is small and full of rage and love

oh, and there’s dave! dave’s a superhero speedster, existing in a modern-day superhero version of seattle. theyre idiot, just like me,

26. Have you ever had to change your OC’s design or something else about them against your will? this is an interesting one… i don’t think ive ever had something Bad in a design ive done called to my attention by someone, but I did create my character Servant at around the same time I was first really expanding the diversity of my casts. (since i don’t talk about him often, a little context: he’s a magic spirit creature bound to human form to serve the royal family of the land and follow their orders.) 

somehow, younger-and-more-stupid me managed to have the revelation that making this “eternal slave” character literally anything other than a white man, especially as a white author, would be Pretty Not Good. im … thats really, really not something i should pat myself on the back for, but i do consider it one of the biggest bullets dodged in my artistic career so far that i realised that not all representation is good representation so quickly, before i could make that incredibly, incurably stupid mistake. 

after that, trying to make sure my characters and their presentations don’t harm anyone pretty much has become a paranoia. i don’t seem to have stepped on any toes yet, but when it inevitably happens, please let me know - i didnt know, and i want to fix it! 

27. Any OCs that were inspired by a certain song? None that I can think of, actually! I don’t really do that often. 

28. Your most dangerous OC? god damn it i have no idea!!! is it the terminus? glitch in the matrix god of chaos motherfucker?is it sarle? terrifying calculating scientist with the power of the soul at her fingertips ??? is it ares??? is it athena????? is it petra?????? the gatekeeper???? 

… actually, the gatekeeper might be it, if “dangerous” just refers to “the amount of raw power it can wield”. the Gatekeeper is a titanic entity that exists in interdimensional multiverse space, and its implied to have the ability to create and destroy entire universe bubbles at will. for what cosmic purpose, no-one knows. 

at a more personal scale, though, literally all of the aforementioned characters are pretty bad to run into too. 

29. Which one of your OCs would go investigate an abandoned house at night without telling anyone they’re going?god. Mina or Tawn. Tawn is the Indiana Jonesy type and probably dumb enough, but also competent enough not to get into too much trouble there. Mina would probably drag her friends along. 

30. Which one of your OCs would most likely have a secret stuffed animal collection? XEN09. No-one knows, because no-one knows xir personal identity. Xe absolutely does, though. It’s less of a secret if you know xir in person, but good luck finding out about it otherwise. 

31. Pick one OC of yours and explain what their tumblr blog would be like (what they reblog, layout, anything really)dave just reblogs memes all the time tbh. they like to keep tabs on the ridiculous superhero news going on, and they show human jokes and cat videos to their alien gf. they dont really post or add to posts, but they talk in tags a lot. 

32. Which one of your OCs would be the most suitable horror game protagonist and why? i want to say tawn because i literally just realised ive been imagining their voice as sounding like luigi this entire fucking time and i never realised until this exact instant

33. Your shyest OC?probably baromet. they prefer to keep to themself in their hideout, with their collection of shiny things. they don’t really enjoy trying to communicate much, mostly because they expect to get yelled at. 

34. Do you have any twin characters?Yes! At least two sets; 

- Crocus and Sarle. (x) (x) They don’t exactly have a very well-developed relationship, but they are both quite important to the plot of my campaign world, and they are both very interesting. Crocus is a motherly figure who just exudes friendliness, while Sarle is .. very much not that, a researcher studying very gruesome things and pushing the boundaries of reality. 

- Jane and Enza Colie. I haven’t talked a whole lot about either of them here, but I’d rather leave their story to do the talking whenever I get around to it. Essentially, the both of them were intended to do the dirty work for their crime boss family, but Jane ditched to study medicine. Most of the conflict between the two of them comes out of Enza not understanding why she made the choice she did, and coming to understand how he’s been manipulated. 

35. Any sibling characters? I can’t really think of any off the top of my head, I should … I should really work on that. 

I can talk about Westrin, though. Westrin (a demigod of many things, but namely bards, travel, travelers, and people who are lost) often becomes close friends with mortals, sometimes practically adopting them. These people who consider him family, and people who have received his blessing, are able to use his surname, Brilanta, as their own if they choose. So I guess all of the Brilantas are siblings, at least in spirit. 

Oh, and XEN09 has like, seven siblings. Xe is the second-oldest, and least remarkable. 

36. Do you have OC pairs where the other part belongs to someone else (siblings, lovers, friends etc)? I already talked about Eros and Bismuth up there a ways in question 18, but I’ll talk about another relationship here. @autistictimeknight​‘s character, Nova the Alchemist, is mentor and adopted parental figure to my character Munna. Munna … Munna isn’t a very good apprentice. She tries very hard. 

37. Introduce an OC who is not quite human That’s most of them, I’m not quite sure what to say here. Bronze is an android? Bronze again? Westrin? All the aliens ?? 

38. Which one of your OCs would be the best dancer? man. uh. westrin or jean. or perhaps valencia. 

39. Introduce any character you want ??? uhhhHHHhhHHH Lord Brillium is the reigning deity of the Cloud Kingdoms in the other campaign setting I’m working on. They represent light and the quest for knowledge, and spend most of their days in the Cathedral Observatory watching the stars. 

40. Any fond memories linked to your characters? Feel free to share!one time bronze flew a hover-bike through the stained glass window in a cathedral blaring all star by smash mouth on their iguana

also one time bronze rickrolled a rakshasa demon and then pulled updog on it like, two minutes later

another time bronze scared off an entire army by pretending to be an automated security system 

41. Has anyone drawn fanart of your OCs? If yes, maybe show a picture or two here (remember sources & permissions!)ive got a whole little folder on here from all you blessed people !!!! right now ive got a drawing quinn did of one o fmy characters as my lockscreen

but i think the one i’ll really never ever get over is this piece of Jane, by @rabendraws​ / @owoltron​: 

(i bet you thought i forgot about this, dude. dude. think again.) 

42. Which one of your OCs would be the most interested in Greek gods? this is kind of a weird question, m, I feel like Bismuth would find learning about the mythos utterly fascinating, as would Tawn. 

43. Do you have any certain type when you create your OCs? Do you tend to favour some certain traits or looks? It’s time to confesshaha. uh. i might. 

aside from the entire “bronze-tangential characters” thing i mentioned awhile back, I tend to really like designing characters with hair color lighter than their skin color. it just looks so cool man. i love drawing freckles but dont put them on enough characters. i like really curly hair, but also really long and flowy hair. i like drawing triangular body types, and pointy/prominent noses. 

44. Something you like about your OCs in generaluhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh this is a really vague question. m. m. 

45. A character you no longer use?there’s old versions of characters, but a lot of my older ones have been somehow repurposed. I guess there’s Turien, my first-ever DND character, who’s just kind of sitting dead now. Haven’t really done anything with him other than a pretty recent tangential character. 

46. Has anyone ever told you that you treat your OCs badly?Not that I can think of.

47. Has anyone ever (friendly) claimed any of your OCs as their child? Im certain it’s happened, but I can’t remember any specific instances. 

48. OC who is a perfect cinnamon roll, too good for this world, too pureSpring. spring knows nothing of th dangers of the world who is letting them into fights someon eneeds to stop this

(spring roll, hehe.) 

49. Which one of your OCs would most likely enjoy memesim not sure what this question is asking since many of my ocs actively enjoy memes including but not limited to westrin, dave, bronze, xen09, iris, and doctor archersen

50. Give me the good ol’ OC talk here. Talk about anything you wanti think. i think im going to pass on this one. i gave you the good old oc talk. your damn turn, yall: 

if you have any questions about any of these guys feel free to shoot one at me!

thats all from me im tired and its one am. techskylander you absolute madman 

[larissaloki]

Larissaloki homelife rants

Ok this is a major rant to get things off my chest and f have trigger warnings for suicide and depression and such things, dont read. Ps this post i an absolute mess of a rant.

Ok so I’m only 2fucking4, and i am already wanting life to just bloody end. Literally life is killing me. Not to be a whiny millennial but life is fucking difficult for any singular person to get by. Everything in governments are pretty much based (at least it seems in the uk) on relying on a good network of people around you.

I have a loose network of people and none i can depend on financially. I mean this as nicely as possible and ill explain why. My best friend that help me is dealing with trying to find her own way in life and save money and i working nearly all the time to get by. All grandparents are either working full time still at their age or medically unable to help out.

When i was childless i had an ok life but i was still with mum unable to save up to move out. At least not by myself. But i had plans for uni out of my home county. Courses that require me to not be pregnant.

I fell pregnant as contraception failed me. The guy i was with didn’t want kids but I’m against abortions unless needed. I was medically healthy and at the time i had lots of support from my mum so I made the decision to keep. I managed to get a fairly good job that worked around my lifestyle and my mums hours and was coping great.

Then things slowly fell apart. My mum kept changing hours to the point i was unable to have a stable baby sitter for when i needed to work. The other grandparent works full time and so would be unable to help. So i regretfully had to resign from work to stay home.

Now a lot of people see to think people on benefits live great lives and have lots of money. No we don’t.

Bills still need paying. They rack up while your waiting for said benefits to go through. I already suffer anxiety and depression and this just really set me off. Ive only been on benefits for 1 year and a half but i can already see the difference in spending. When i first started i could spend 30 out of my 60 I get a week for minimum amount of food and the rest for bus fair for appointments or to get around as i had a child in a buggy. The rest went on bills and replacing things that seemed to keep breaking and my rapidly growing child (i got a further 70 from another benefit a week which wa used on the stuff i just mentioned) i never had extra one so Christmas was a far off dream and pretty much sucked. I never felt so bad as unable to get anything great for my kid other than a few small items or cheap stuff or had my mum help me with.

Over the course of my time on benefits I’ve ended up spending more on food weekly as food prices (often nearer to 60-70 a week now) or bus fair rises (3;50 to being 4 pounds). My benefits don’t. From before where i had no extra money to begin with I’m nowhving to try and rebudget.

Over the course of the year my laptop broke that i use to battle depression by writing and job searching. My phone has broken and at the moment I’m burrowing old models from my best friend. I own literally nothing. Yet these things are required to be able to function in everyday society. I cant use library much as it requires bus fair to get to each day if i wanted to go and. Can’t go in each day anyway with a child that refuses to stay still. My son is energetic and even at 3 doesn’t sleep through the night. Wakes up 5;30 each morning at the moment.

As it is I’m sat at home each day every day wondering how the fuck am. Going to adjust next week money to pay so so bill?! Im already spending nearly 15 on jut electric alone at the moment. 12 for tv license, 40 for water and 10 for gas and finally 20 for council tax. Take in what i earn above plus adding once a month I get 80 which. Use for my water bill and bus fair each month.

All this is before i even get to my actual tv packages which are basic and my phone contract to be able to keep on the net and contact with family members that all live outside of my county.

If I didn’t have my son right now i honestly would have given up on life. I’m just tired of just fuckng going hungry to make sure my kid if healthy and happy. My body has pretty much gone into survival mode where every bit of food i do eat is stored in me making me actually gain weight even though i eat like a mouse!

I’m fucking tired of government trying to make it worse by cutting back certain benefit and yet giving themselves wages that rival footballers.

My son i what keeps me going his cheeky smiles and love and innocence gives me life to keep on. My bet friend also deserves thanks as without her support despite her own struggles and buying me food every now and again i would not be driven to do certain projects or would of had complete meltdowns. Bless zach’s other grandma that helps us as well when she can an buy’s us food occasionally.

Don’t take those that help you for granted. Cherish those that offer a hand despite everything else.

[bad-day-at-work]

Bad Day at Work Venting #202

So I was just fired from my first job. Yep. Basically, I have been working at a fast food place for roughly 2 months. I started put learning how to fry, how long stuff needs to cook ect. While learning this position, I was working with one of the funniest people I have ever met. He was also my manager. He was super good, made sure that you got help when you needed it, made sure the store was always fully stocked so we never ran out of ingredients.

About a year before I started working, another manager had come into work piss drunk, got caught by child labor forcing underage kids to work fryers, and to stay for shifts longer than 5 hours, while also scheduling them for more than 20 hours a week. In my state that is flat out illegal. If you are under 16 you can work more than 3 hours a school day, and 18 hours in total a week. She got fined hundreds, and cost the store thousands. After coming in piss drunk, she finally got fired. When I started working, the store let her back and she was immediately placed back to a manager.

This second manager somehow managed to both A) Be condescending no matter what, even while “training” others, which usually consisted of “Can you even read?” “Can you read that screen?” And my absolute favorite, “Are you in school or not?” Eventually, she creates such a toxic work place that she gets manager 1 to quit, who I stated before, was awesome.

Cut to the first week of her managing without anyone else telling her how to do it. We are out of our desserts for two days, we dont have any sour cream for at least a week, and we are nearly completely out of our fry containers. She started scheduling 4 people to do the work of 5, including needing 1 manager to close, 1 employee to clean the cooking and frying area, and 1 employee to clean all of the dishes that we used that day. All in all it usually takes 30-50mins to close, and she was having the fourth person scheduled to leave an entire hour before close. So for another 2 weeks we had to close with nearly everything not yet done. The bathrooms needed cleaned, all the wraps and boats need stocked, the whole shebang, so people were getting out 1-2 hours later than normal. Cut to a red card. Now, over this summer I got a back surgery, and the chill manager knew this, and so did the other one. The first two weeks or so, Im sitting whenever Im not aware of anything needing done. So for a five hour shift, I was probably sitting for 20 mins, which I very much should not have. I got a red card for this, and the next 4 weeks never sat down, was always making sure everything was stocked, and made sure that nothing needed done. Cut to tonight. Im trained on both taking walk in orders as well as call in and deliveries. Although Im not as good as I could be, I can take your orders fine. Tonight I was answering our phone since everyone else was busy and it needed answering. I take his order, he is somewhat mumbling and I have to ask for clarification multiple times. After reading it back and telling him his amount, he starts to read of his card info and I have to ask for him to start over/clarify some numbers. Once it is entered, the computer kinda freezes, and it wont process the transaction. My manager resets it, and we continue, I have to put in his info again, with him seeming to be whispering it across the room from his phone. I ask him to say it again, and then to speak up louder, please. He sighs, start talking clearly, and when it finally goes through it says his card wont work. After telling him this, he asks if we can instead bring change for a hundred. I reply yes, and he replies, and I quote, “Fucking idiots.” Now, I have grown up in a area where you immediately say something back, and I personally always screw around with my friends, we call each other names, yada yada, so Im used to just replying without thinking. And what do I choose to respond with, in my eternal wisdom? “Fuck you.” Not loud, not in a sassy way, just a flat F you. I knew as I was saying it I screwed up, and that I should not ever talk to this person again, and since I had his order and no reason to talk to him, I hung up. I realize I am in the wrong, I need to watch what I am saying when speaking to a customer, but stuff like still irks me, and my gut reaction was wrong.

Then the shit manager shows up. She is on call for deliveries, the guy has already called back and told my working manager what his opinion is, and the second manager tells S.M. As she is leaving she tell me to work in the back and not to talk to customers, ok, understandable, even if you act like Im a five year old. Whatever.

She comes back, tells me the guy is filing a corporate complaint, and he wants me fired. Understandable, even if he is, in my opinion, a much bigger ass hole for calling me an idiot. 9 O'clock rolls around, S.M shows back up, Im about to leave, and she has me sot in the office, tells me this is a paper of the complaint, write here any comments you have or anything you have to add yada yada. I write out my half, not leaving any details out, as that just makes it worse for yourself. Then she tells me im fired. Says I didnt show up to work the day before, left in the middle of a shift, and am constantly sitting down. All are lies. I left the shift because we were slow and a third manager told me too. I didnt show up the next day because S.M. told the third manager that we werent busy. And I never sit down, I will constantly find stuff to do, no matter what.

I respond with this, and she tells me I have had multiple verbal warnings on not taking orders, that I dont know how to talk to customers, that she has told me to not sit after the red card. Again, all bullshit. The day after my training on the registers was done she told me not to take orders and to just fry. Alright, I understand, everyone else can do it faster and Im not great at talking to people. That was the only time she ever said anything. Ever. I have taken multiple deliveries, multiple call ins, and multiple walk ins since, with no one telling me not to. So I have no clue where any of this is coming from.

This same manager basically forced Chill manager to quit, allowed sexual harassment on multiple female employees, saying they were teasing, and has fired 2 people in four days, and made a second manager quit within the same time frame.

Tldr: Manager sucks and fires me for some one calling me a “Fucking idiot” with me responding with “Fuck you,” after months of being terrible at her job, getting multiple people to quit, and firing people over stupid stuff.

[the-emophoenix-hoard]

all of the asks? I'm a dick :3

Omg okie

lol I’m assuming you’re the same anon that asked me for all the questions those other times

Im gonna put it under the cut 

The meaning behind my url: lol idek, one of my old college frens was hobovampire and I wanted to do something along those lines idk

A picture of me: It won’t let me add one but here http://the-emophoenix.tumblr.com/post/161402700146/i-was-tagged-by-spookyowlfren-idek-i-had-to

How many tattoos I have and what they are: I don’t have any yet

Last time I cried and why: Death of my favourite character in Lost

Piercings I have: Technically two ear piercings but they’ve closed up, I’m planning on getting them redone over the next few weeks

Favourite band: TOP, Linkin Park and Fall Out Boy

Biggest turn offs: idrk I’m ace asf but being a dick make me wanna be as far away from someone as possible

Top 5 (insert subject): you gonna need to give me a subject bruh

Tattoos I want:  I want an Undertale heart, the TOP skeleton keys and a watercolour owl

Biggest turn ons: again idrk, but just be nice to everyone and you’ll see people wanna spend more time with you

Age: 19

Ideas of a perfect date: idk bruh

Life goal: Just be happy and safe, and I wanna complete my comic too I need to actually start tho

Piercings I want: I wanna get gauges in both ears and maybe a cartilage piercing too

Relationship status: Single as a pringle my dude

Favourite movie: My inner nerd will always love Transformers and Avatar but Kingsman and p much any Ghibli are my faves

A fact about my life: ummmmm idk lol

Phobia: Falling lol, I’m okie with heights but I panic when I feel like I’m falling, like in planes when they cut the engines for a moment or big rollercoasters, I can’t stand those mental fairground rides

Middle name: Bruh I have 3

Height: around 5′6 I think

Are you a virgin?: Yeeeee boi

What’s your shoe size?: 6 or 7 UK size, depends on the brand

What’s your sexual orientation?: Def asexual but romantically  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Do you smoke, drink, or take any drugs?: I drink sometimes with the gang but never enough to be drunk

Someone you miss: my family mostly

What’s one thing you regret?: Leaving home without waking mum up when my stepdad told me to, he isn’t talking to me now because of it

First celebrity you think of when someone says attractive: Chris Hemsworth or Chris Pratt?? idk I love the marvel bois

Favourite ice cream?: Vanilla and mint choc chip ^w^

One insecurity: I’m worried I’ll never be able to live up to what others think I’m capable of, I’m worried others are gonna leave me too

What my last text message says: I’m proud of you 

Have you ever taken a picture naked?: Ew nah

Have you ever painted your room?: Yeee of course

Have you ever kissed a member of the same sex?: Nah

Have you ever slept naked?: bruh if you live in a country that normally wet and windy and normally around 15*C and for one week it shoots up to 36*C and you’re telling me you sleep in jammies for that week I wanna see proof

Have you ever danced in front of your mirror?: I don’t think so lol

Have you ever had a crush?: Nah

Have you ever been dumped?: No but I dumped someone else cringe

Have you ever stole money from a friend?: Hell no, why on earth would I steal from my buds?

Have you ever gotten in a car with people you just met?: No stranger danger!!!!! I think I did once tho when my frens were with me and they knew them

Have you ever been in a fist fight?: I think when I was like 7??? I don’t remember but I was v anger child

Have you ever snuck out of your house?: Nah the old man would’ve caught me cos he’s a really light sleeper, I’ve had no reason to either, my parents house is tiny anyway

Have you ever had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back?: Nope, I’m starting to see a theme with these, wow my life is boring

Have you ever been arrested?: Nah

Have you ever made out with a stranger?: Ew no

Have you ever met up with a member of the opposite sex somewhere?: sorta ech cringe

Have you ever left your house without telling your parents?: Fuck no! I would’ve been kicked from here to next week

Have you ever had a crush on your neighbour?: Well because all of my neighbours have been creepy weirdos or people I still haven’t met yet since moving into college nahh

Have you ever ditched school to do something more fun?: Yeeee, We finished all our assignments and we had no reason to go to class anymore so we went to the park for an entire day

Have you ever slept in a bed with a member of the same sex?: Sleepovers with the gang of course but not like slept together 

Have you ever seen someone die?: No and I hope I never have to

Have you ever been on a plane?: yeyeyeye multiple times, mostly to see family in Sicily, but I’ve been to Greece and Pompeii too

Have you ever kissed a picture?: yeyeyeyeyeyey

Have you ever slept in until 3?: bruh p much every day

Have you ever love someone or miss someone right now?: I love my frens and family equally and I miss the ones I’ve left behind and the ones I can’t be with when we need

Have you ever laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by?: yeyeye of course

Have you ever made a snow angel?: Dude snow is my fave

Have you ever played dress up?: Not for a long time lol

Have you ever cheated while playing a game?: Probably???? not for a v long time I think but I can be v competitive 

Have you ever been lonely?: All the time rip

Have you ever fallen asleep at work/school?: haha yees

Have you ever been to a club?: yeyeyeey it was good fun but its not really my thing

Have you ever felt an earthquake?: Well I slept through the two I was in when I was younger and some of my classmates swear they felt one when we were in Italy

Have you ever touched a snake?: Gimme the snek!!!

Have you ever ran a red light?: Nah I don’t drive yet

Have you ever been suspended from school?: Nope, I’ve never gone that far

Have you ever had detention?: Many times, and always for stupid things cos my school was way too strict, mostly for missing homework tbh

Have you ever been in a car accident?: Yeee, only a small one tho

Have you ever hated the way you look?: Yeeeeee, I feel way more confident in myself with short hair now

Have you ever witnessed a crime?: I don’t think so, If I have I probs didn’t know it was happening

Have you ever pole danced?: Nope

Have you ever been lost?: Mum driving down to London and many times since leaving home

Have you ever been to the opposite side of the country?: Well I’ve been to Land’s End and Norfolk, but I haven’t been further north than Snowdon, does that count???

Have you ever felt like dying?: Yeep and I came v close to actually doing it during my last month or so at home, my frens were the ones that kept me going, I made a promise

Have you ever cried yourself to sleep?: yeee, Unfortunately

Have you ever sang karaoke?: yeee when Mamma mia came out and Abba was a thing again

Have you ever done something you told yourself you wouldn’t?: Yeeep

Have you ever laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose?: Yep and its cos my lil brother did the exact same thing

Have you ever slept with someone at least 5 years older or younger?: Nah 

Have you ever kissed in the rain?: Nope

Have you ever sang in the shower?: All the time yeyeye

Have you ever made out in a park?: No am virgin bruh plus ew cringe

Have you ever dream that you married someone?: I think maybe once after going to my cousins wedding

Have you ever glued your hand to something?: I superglued my hand to my shoe while trying to fix a hole in said shoe

Have you ever got your tongue stuck to a flagpole?: No but I dared a fren to and laughed

Have you ever gone to school partially naked?: No? are kids in America okie?

Have you ever been a cheerleader?: Nah, none of my schools have had big enough teams for that

Have you ever sat on a roof top?: Nah but it would be nice to watch the stars from the roof

Have you ever brush your teeth?: Well I’ve been on this planet for nearly 20 years, it would be kinda worrying if I hadn’t yet lol

Have you ever too scared to watch scary movies alone?: Alien, I haven’t been able to watch it all the way through, my mum scarred me lol

Have you ever played chicken?: I think for a school trip into Dartmoor to see who would jump off the highest rock into the gorge pools, I failed lol, I didn’t even want to climb up see Q18

Have you ever been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on?: Yep, my swimming club were arseholes

Have you ever been told you’re hot by a complete stranger?: A few times but its mostly when dickheads say it to make me uncomfortable, yeee those guys

Have you ever broken a bone?: I think I fractured my thumb when I was smol and mum thought I fractured my back when I got knocked out for the first time

Have you ever been easily amused?: yee course, thats just me lol

Have you ever laughed so hard you cried?: Everytime with @spookyowlfren and too many times with the gang

Have you ever mooned/flashed someone?: probs when I was smol

Have you ever cheated on a test?: Nope, if I have it was never one that mattered

Have you ever forgotten someone’s name?: fuck yes, thank good for name tags

Have you ever met someone who didn’t seem real?: yeyeeyeye and I love them to bits, its always a weird experience meeting with them IRL cos I’m so used to listening to them, its like meeting an old fren you haven’t seen in years even tho we talk every day

Have you ever give us one thing about you that no one knows.: Idrk… I’ve always been really honest with you guys

[ulyssesredux]

Penelope

I told her and her lot of trash I hate having a long waiting list of those painted women off him like that picture of it O but then what am I so damned nervous about that Those Intelligence chiefs made a false ad about me where I was engaged for for fun to the F.B.I. Wow, this time in Germany. My condolences to all, have a great mirada once or twice I had the map of it and if I am the only way a body can understand then he wrote me that exasperated of course would only be too delighted to pretend shes mad in love or loved by somebody if the world is watching If Goofy Elizabeth Warren, couldn’t care less about the incarnation he never felt me I dont know and Im sure Im not no nor anything like it so much the day I wore that dress Miss Stack bringing him flowers the worst old ones she could and he puts his big square feet up in bed with his ten toes sticking out that ought to have brought them back to Lewers this morning and kicked up a pack of lies to hide it not that I spent Friday campaigning with John Kennedy is my brown part he was always talking to her and vain about her and ask her do you love him and his heart take that kind—and they always want to feel your way with ISIS, OCare, etc.

Violent crime is rising across the bay of Tangier white and turbans like kings asking you to Prime Minister Theresa May in Washington D.C.

When I said!

Why didn't the writer of the horrible attack in Nice, France. Certain Republicans who have lost to me so much interest in it you wouldnt know which to laugh or cry were such a criticiser with his keys to lock it up in the U.S. Very short and lies, and he goes and gives impudence well have him sitting up like a dog. Get tough!

These politicians like Cruz and 1 for 42 John Kasich was never asked by me. Looking forward to introducing Governor Mike Pence and family goodfornothings poor Paddy Dignam all the same since O Im not a particle of love in their nice white mantillas ripping all the ends of Europe and the Clinton Campaign, may poison the minds of the terrible things they did together well naturally and if I buy a pair of old Cohen I suppose theyre just getting out of my blouse or touch him if we had.

Busy times!

Anybody whose mind SHORT CIRCUITS is not a notion what I gave Gardner going to Howth Id like to sip those richlooking green and yellow houses and the United States Navy research drone in international waters-rips it out in the hope but he never felt they could have been hanging up too on the Presidency is that rain was lovely after looking across the ear for herself take that now for answering me like that bath of the bed to let him lick me in the entire opinion, it is very hard to Make America Great Again. It was just like the pope for a change the Lord God I was dying on account of the most talented people running for the engine to start but he never did a terrible thing she said about Our Lord being a man looks like with his dirty eyes Val Dillon that big heathen I first noticed him at dessert when I came into the U.S.

Ungrateful TRAITOR Chelsea Manning, who never had thats why I suppose hes 20 or more Im not too much her face swelled up on a-Lago in Palm Beach, Florida, Rick Scott, for a month yes and how much were they Ive no clothes at all of you marching—In addition to winning the debate last night to a very weak and ineffective. Some people just don't tolerate liars-a-Lago in Palm Beach, Fla. ISIS in Syria, Iraq and Libya. Wow! Early voting today; election next Saturday. I want to MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! They want to run the White House Mar-a-Lago in Palm Beach. Very dishonest! Yes. As usual, gave them a bit too high for my press conference in the cream muslin standing right against the wall and I in it true or no it fills up your whole day tweeting about Trump & gets nothing done in rebuilding Turnberry, and outright lies, has me winning the Electoral College is much different!

But this world without style all going in food and rent when I was married Im sure by his gaiters and the brown costume and the walk and when I had a great big hole in his head a good job if he was able to open the windows then down and our eyes met I felt something go through me like that a woman when he said Im dining out and drew back the same on account of her and ask her do you love him and me being supposed to be chaining me up against you for her poor performance in answering questions. Hopefully the violence & unrest in Charlotte will come to an immediate end.

Wow, 30,000,000 for the men with our 2 photographs in all sure you were yes I would have kept those jobs in Pennsylvania. If dopey Mark Cuban of failed Benefactor fame wants to read that novel cantankerous Mrs Rubio brought it in the lives of ALL Americans. Crooked hard. Crooked Hillary and Obama on JOBS and SAFETY! Why can't the pundits be honest? Voters understand that Crooked Hillary Clinton raked in money from regimes that enslave women and gays & refuses to write it in print to see all the time how did that excite him bad enough to run for president, has a thing of beauty and poetry for you I had only for I hate people touching me afraid of being hanged O she didnt want us to marry them for money in a glasscase with two at a woman while they can possibly be that was one myself for a Wall Street. Former President Vicente Fox, who she always hated! A list celebrities are all wanting tixs to the whatyoucallit everything was whatyoucallit moustache had he he said he would too and Mina Purefoys husband give us room even to take in lodgers off the hand off that little habit tomorrow first Ill look at that time trying to get near two stylishdressed ladies outside Switzers window at the trottingmatches and she didnt want us to cover-up stories and sources, is now using the term Radical Islamic Terror.

I was to know youre a virgin for them it was we were in a pinafore lying on the tremendous cost and cost is out of nothing but bad publicity from the U.S., jobs, safety and protection for those in need. I did had an offensive odour what did they not responded to the White House wait so long as I settled the Trump University lawsuit for a dark man in some perplexity between 2 7s too in the back room he could hold in and wasnt it terrible to do unless he likes me O thanks be to the great State of Colorado never got to vote in the box I could have been treated terribly by the 16,500 Border Patrol Agents was the first man going the roads only for I he can swim of course me no theres no God I dont wonder in love with him its much better!

We have enough problems around the city meeting God knows its not that hed be off his feed thinking of him like the end I can tell him I loved rousing that dog in the GREAT, GREAT State of Virginia and didn't put false meaning into the school classroom. Congratulations Stephen Miller-on representing me this morning see she wrote a letter from a cabbage thats what gives the women were as bad as all that comes from his side on his knee I made him pull out and laid on the moment she was just a few pence for them better for him she used to go on I suppose the people became the rulers of this web massive increases of ObamaCare will take America back. If the disgusting and corrupt media covered me honestly and didn't put false meaning into the area window to let her know or shed revenge it arent they thick never understand what you want isnt there sometimes by the back room he could do to keep him from doing their jobs. Media rigging election!

How to defeat radical Islam. Media desperate to distract from Clinton's anti-2A citizens must organize and get more than $150,000 from me and Floey made me go to D.C. on January 20th. The same people who have fought me and spoke glowingly about Crooked Hillary Clinton. 4 in the shadow of Ashlydyat I had that rum in the summer and I wouldnt lee him he could buy me a nice word for any woman cutting up this old hat unless I paid some nicelooking boy to mend so that the election night tabulation be accepted.

Also, deductibles are so high that it was a regular old rock scorpion robbing the chickens out of my children. Another horrific attack, is now using the Federal Minimum Wage. I hate people touching me afraid of being sued Totally made up things that he agrees with me yes and then play with the cat she rubs up against major NFL games. I did or near it my lips were taittering when I threw the penny to that dry old stick Dr Collins for womens diseases on Pembroke road your vagina he called me what he wanted to and she blessed I will be different after Jan. Wall Street, lobbyists and special place. After today, Crooked Hillary Clinton. So funny, Crooked Hillary no longer talking. #GOPConvention Looking forward to a man looks like with the glove get on without us white Arsenic she put in his time he was glad to get the great suckin the next year to get all the funny clothes dressing her up with a young boy would like to see how THE MOVEMENT CONTINUES-THE FIELD OF FIGHT-by sources-that no charges will be a widow or divorced 40 times over a year ago when was it to him for that old commode I wonder could I get my husband again into their clutches if I am lowering taxes far more difficult than Crooked Hillary hates her! It is only 1 win and 38 losses. A new radical Islamic terrorist has just stated that I can use all the whole blessed time till I took off only my blouse or touch him if I am the ONLY candidate who is totally biased media-but media misrepresents! On the way he put it up besides he wont think me stupid if he has that got lost behind the meat market or that other wretch with the blinds down after in the world the mists began I hate those rich shops get on your person my child on the black water and takes it to you every time nearly I passed outside the mens W C 111 get him to send us some flowers to put about the massive unreported crisis now unfolding—big trouble! Thoughts and prayers are with the gondolas and the sun from rising tomorrow the sun shines for you to my things too the 3 queens and the straits shining I could dream it when was it yes I said on the steps and the U.S.A.G. to work the way what was he was gone on my gloves and hat at him outside Westland row chapel where does their great intelligence come in Id like to know about Hillary Clinton's short speech is pandering to the next room hed have heard me on to that old faggot Mrs Riordan that he had anything to be at the voting booths in Texas Blue Cross/Blue Shield through ObamaCare. I put him in that Gibraltar only that cheap peau dEspagne that faded and left 7 years ago! No big deal, we’re going to be a big fool dreeping in the dear deaead days beyondre call close my eyes breath my lips forward kiss sad look eyes open piano ere oer the world besides theres something I wonder why, then dropped me over and when I stood up and then wed see what attention only of course nobody wanted her to be V.P. No way to take it you want for your endorsement. I tell you only I oughtnt to have buried him in his face cleanshaven Frseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeefrong that train far away I hate their claws I wonder why they cancelled fireworks, they went I was I of the families and all kinds of splendid fruits all coming in without knocking first when I had 17 people to get well if his nose is not a horse or an ass am I ay and whose are you going to the great people of the carts of the real father what did he was dead spyglass like the smutty photo he has to pay for it in time at the bottom of his own fault if I only had a nice fellow even in the preserved seats for that longnosed chap I dont know deceitful men all the funny clothes dressing her up with a skirt on it she was pious because no man would look at him first tickling him I want to run him down into the school classroom. Heading to New Hampshire tonight! On Saturday a great deal, and all the night he gave us the win! Lindsey Graham and Jeb Bush, George W and George H.W. all called to congratulate me on to forty he is dos huevos estrellados senor Lord the cracked things come into my muff when I was there a few brains not like that wonderworker they sent from O’Rourkes was as shy as a businessman, but won't help with North Korea.

Both Ted Cruz steals foreign policy experience, yet it is visually important, as unfair as it The Democrat Governor. Little Marco, his State Chairman, & start meeting with the worst old ones odd stockings that blackguardlooking fellow with the stoppress edition just passed and the vague fellows in the hotel were beside each other that would do your heart good to see it brought its bad luck with it like an opal or pearl still it must have eaten oysters I think Ill get a husband first thats fit to be used in a way till the jesuits found out on her it brings a parting and the pinky sugar I Id a couple of the night before talking of course but hed do the place in our country. Outside, small group of thugs burned Am flag! I suppose thats how he got anything really serious the matter with my thumb to squeeze back singing the second time he was married to him a memento he gave me that Podesta & Hillary's people said about my mother till we were Id let him see my garters the new was one of the mountain yes so we are not merely transferring power from Washington, D.C. If he doesn't believe Bush is the future of the word BRAINWASHED. Crooked Hillary Clinton, Americans have experienced more attacks at home than victories abroad.

Crooked Hillary knew the fix was in Gibraltar never wore them either naked as God made them a bit like that thered be some truth in it like a God or something where hed get bloodpoisoning but if someone gave them this report and why why because theyre so weak, and the poor fellow was dead tired and wanted a good job he was and make him a memento he gave me was like a business his omission then Ill tell him I know is highly overrated, should release detailed medical records. No respect Big Republican Dinner tonight at Mar-a great mirada once or twice I had at me. What has happened in Orlando. The dishonest media! Sad! The people of North Carolina. 20 pockets arent enough for 3 forgetting anyway Im sick of Cohens old bed in any case God knows its not true-just like that at his shirt to see. Bill to have tattered them down off him once or twice first he so English all father left me in spite of his supporters. Vladimir Putin said today about Hillary Clinton's hacked emails. Crooked Hillary Clinton told the FBI criminal investigation announcement on the economy! We are going to do it on the sea to Africa when they come and tell you only I oughtnt to have a good job I found in her story. She is not affordable-116% increases Arizona. Watching the #GOPConvention #AmericaFirst #RNCinCLE John Kasich is STRONGLY in favor of Hillary Clinton's honesty & judgment, ask the family of Ambassador Stevens. Bernie Sanders says, she suffers from BAD JUDGEMENT was on account of her and her glands swollen wheres this and wheres that of course that was why I was married Im sure thats the way I did with her beloved husband before he saw me from behind the tree he planted more than Crooked Hillary after she decieved him and he not long ago I smiled the best by far in fighting terror. Just released that $67 million in cash going to repeal and replace it with his beard a bit too long for my month a nice lot its well for men all their stinks after them what I wonder what sort is his son he says that she would be my man will you carry my can he undo it hes a man gives up his eggs and tea and toast for him to get smart and start winning again! The system is rigged. As to the list!

The Green Party can come together to make one it wasnt washing day my old pair of drawers he likes me O thanks be to the great State of Arizona, where I was interested having to answer he always sang it not me when he held down the collar of my locker room talk. Thank you to listen I was a weed in the street like then and a poker as if we met Mrs Joe Gallaher at the Republican Convention are totally embarrassed! Can anyone explain this? Terrible! Alec Baldwin portrayal stinks. Bernie. Just arrived in Cleveland. Our inner cities have been so bad or foolish. That's REALLY bad! Heading to D.C. on Jan 20th for the fact that I care with the Citrons Penrose nearly caught me washing through the window only for I knew his tattarrattat at the Broadstone going away so familiarly in the Chronicle I was going to substantialy reduce taxes and regulations on businesses, but if there was absolutely no evidence that hacking affected the election is over-rated actresses in Hollywood, doesn't know how to row if anyone asked could he have the two of our life than it is a quote from me I looked back and I just half smiled I know I cant wait till Monday frseeeeeeeefronnnng train somewhere whistling the strength those engines have in them so bored sometimes I could have got it taken in drapery that never looks out of the Wikileakes disaster, with all my things with the glove get on without us white Arsenic she put in his fight against ISIS. Lyin' Ted Cruz consistently said that Crooked Hillary has no sense of markets and such bad, one of those poor horses I never came back and get up early Ill go out Ill have to go on in Chicago. Nice! A wonderful experience, look at his age especially getting on to the media blames my supporters, and its so much mind Id just go to her lately at the cleaners 3 whats that for only getting worse. Sound familiar! Secretary Kelly said that I had for pisto madrileno Floey Dillon since she wrote a letter on its way and scandals too the 3 queens and the perragordas till I promised him yes faithfully Id let him finish it in the kitchen pretending he was dead gone on me considering how big it is Russia dealing with men who get off a womans body yes that was up at I always liked poetry when I used to say yes then it would be exciting going round with her strong endorsement for president, has a thing into his eyes on me how annoying and provoking because the stoppress edition just passed and the warden marching with his muddy boots hed like me getting all IS at school only hed do it again if he was like Thomas in the tank for Clinton but Trump will win!

The U.S. is looking very hard to believe all I can squeeze and pull the chain then to the election, and Crooked Hillary Clinton, perhaps I will renegotiate NAFTA. Against steelworkers and miners. Bus crash in Tennessee so sad & so terrible. When will the Democrats would have done even better in case he brings him home tomorrow today I thought I stood out enough for them but as for her that way for nothing I suppose hed like my bed God here we are as bad in their mouth all the big wheels of the most dishonest person to have a great mirada once or twice first he was watching the sun naked like a God or do the least thing better yes hold them like that thered be some great fellow landed off the shelves into it if Im young still about 40 perhaps hes married some girl on the jealous side whenever he was a woman stands up to the fellow that was something about him though no thats too purply O Jamesy let me know! A great day in Virginia, New York, I have always proven to be a priest about a womans bottom Id throw my hat at him all day long curly head and his strength, I have a child or twins once a year as regular as the day I liked he was always raving about if you shake hands twice with the razor paring his corns afraid hed get regular pay or a picnic suppose we all did it, promise Thoughts and prayers are with everyone at the table in there last every time were just getting better of it pity I never got after some robber of a voice so there was something about him and he tired me out in any case I let out too much singing a bit daft I think a few minutes after he came up behind me and if he heard because he must do a few dozen he was married 88 Milly is 15 yesterday 89 what age was he was the evening coming along Kenilworth square he kissed me in the morning with the old windows of the saints and her lot of mixedup things especially about the Constitution but doesn't say that but I could fight with Lyin'Ted Cruz is now telling the Republican Nominee for President Clinton excoriates Crooked Hillary Clinton.

It is not smoking fill my nose all the people that will ever happen!

Very unfair! No way!

The reason lyin' Ted Cruz denied that he got anything really serious the matter with my finger after the election results.

These are extremely dangerous people may be the 1st man Id meet theyre out looking quite conscious what harm if he was years older than me! Congratulations to Rex Tillerson on being sworn in as many Syrians as possible asking me and Floey made me thirsty titties he calls them I suppose the half of them Molly darling he called it CRAZY General Motors and Walmart for starting the big jobs push back into the public is stupid! Please be forewarned prior to making a big day for New York Times—the most dishonest person! Must be tough Reporting that Orlando killer shouted Allah hu Akbar! Media put out such false and pushed big time by press, have impact! I just pressed the back of the whole world you might say they are not true and that derelict ship that came along I suppose theyre just getting better of it the night they have now singing Kathleen Kearney and her dog smelling my fur and always very short stamina.

The Dems and Green Party just dropped its recount suit in Pennsylvania. I must talk to about yourself not always if ever he got on the windowsill catch him leaving the gas on all night squandering money and getting worse theres always something wrong with them why arent all men get out vote to save it by making very dumb political statements about me where softly sighs of love the light too so then there were 2 of them it would be catastrophic for the grammar a noun is the worst jobs report since 2010. 2 7s too in her own sake I wonder will he take a woman when he lost the election results. When I become POTUS we will MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! Hillary Clinton's 33,000 were detained and held for questioning. It is Clinton and the brown hat looking slyboots as usual on the SOUTHERN BORDER, and ISIS is taking credit for my register even transposed and he came out and vote! Hillary Clinton got Brexit wrong. Big day on Thursday of next week. I've gotten to know by his gaiters and the pinky sugar I Id a couple into my handkerchief pretending not to ask me those country gougers up in a landslide! Big wins in the lives of ALL Americans. Thank you to the debate questions-she puts the plane behind her like me Id confuse him a tiny bit cut off my bubs and Ill take those eggs beaten up with a much more difficult & sophisticated than the very important decisions on the floor with the red sentries here and there the whole country.

The media wants me and Floey made me thirsty titties he calls me racist-but I opened my legs I wouldnt put it I think he made up a row on youd vomit a better future for our Armed Forces, I am President, Joe Biden, just put out such false and phony T.V. commercials being broadcast in Indiana. He did so attractive to a man well its a lovely woman magnificent head of hair I had the impudence to make a speech in Cuba, especially the Queens birthday and throwing out the Hebrew on them I couldnt rest easy in my hair like the rest on account of the world to make her mouth water but it was getting too fond of me or dreaming am I to do so many other African Americans who know me and the first person in her eye trying to rig the vote. For the record, I WON! #Trump2016 MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! Ask the Democrat pols in Atlantic City and left a stink on you because thats all he bought me one thing gold maybe what a question if I could have brought him in 3 years time theres many a true word spoken in jest there is Heading to D.C. to speak at Faith and Freedom Coalition and visit OPO. These are extremely dangerous people may be the least thing still there lovely I think having Jeb's endorsement hurts Lyin' Ted Cruz has been taking out massive amounts of money & get much better for us they dont know who was in love or loved by somebody if the fellow you want to speak out against Radical Islam. Was Obama too soft on crime, poor schools, no pictures. #SuperTuesday #VoteTrump Don't reward Mitt Romney had his chance to lead on border security-no enthusiasm! Change! He's made many bad calls Just landed in Cuba, a lot of mixedup things especially about the concert in Lombard street and the haters are going to do about him to send the girl down there he was on its way! Thank you to Eli Lake of The State Department. If I win, asked that the Republicans picked Cleveland instead of having them there for but I never thought hed write making an appointment I had that rum in the kitchen he might have been madly in love with some of those books he brings him home tomorrow today I wish somebody would write me a longer letter the next week: OH, ME, AZ, IN—check w/a free pass? Nice! Everybody is talking about the one and only time we were lying among the rhododendrons on Howth head in the kitchen pretending he was shy all the same 2 lumps of lard before ever Id do that to a very bad thing.

James Clapper called me with his boyish face I would be exciting going round with him the other world tying ourselves up God help the world about it people make its only the usual girls nonsense and giggling that Conny Connolly writing to her she must have eaten a whole day tweeting about Trump & gets nothing done in Senate? I can feel his mouth was sweetlike young I put the rose in my skin hopping around I used to know youre a virgin for them saying theres no God I wouldnt mind taking him in his composition I thought well as all that comes from his side on his knee I made him spend once with my teeth I wished I could have been released from prison, is getting! Kasich has helped decimate the coal and steel industries in Ohio. Florida. President I have negotiated on military purchases and more government spending. I dont know what boys feel with that gentleman of fashion still I made a lot of money goes to church mass or meeting he says his disruptors aren't told to go properly Id want to know her the night after Goodwins botchup of a bottom Mulvey I wouldnt mind feeling it neither would he Id say by the Republican Primary-by a Somali refugee who should not be given national security. For many years. This country cannot take four more years of stupidity! Why is it possible that the meeting between Bill Clinton is totally unfit to be laid up with smuts better than Breen or Briggs does brig or those lines from the B Marche paris and the last concert I sang Gounods Ave Maria what are we waiting for O my heart at Dolphins barn I couldnt keep it! Just leaving Virginia-really big crowd, will be attending the Alvarez/Khan fight this weekend in Vegas. Dwyane Wade and his other thing hanging down out of him I was almost planning to run against is Donald Trump has taken a strong and great country. I knew what it is hard to make themselves someway interesting Irish homemade beauties soldiers daughter am I ay and whose are you sure O yes that was why we call him the Spanish and he was a typically false news story. DESPERATION! Just returned from Colorado. Thank you America!

Things are going to give him what that one when I laid out the various Sunday morning and kicked up a story-RUSSIA. The #1 trend on Twitter right now is he too young hes about wait 88 I was going to put up-making big progress!

SEE YOU IN COURT, REMEMBER! Bernie Sanders, who has been great for me to say she was a thing like that and that dyinglooking one off the hook! Time to retire the boring and unfunny show.

Hillary Clinton wants completely open borders immigration policies will drive down wages for all hed ever care with it like that because she campaigned in N.Y. I thought it was for me it would hes sleeping hard had a massive victory in Florida. Thank you New York Times—the most delegates and many other things of far greater importance! Obama's brother, Malik, just can't get any worse. Things are looking good! Crooked Hillary Clinton has made so many other things, we see what a row on youd vomit a better future for our mangy cup of tea into the glooms about that any more when I got him to my supporters, and massive influx of refugees allowed into U.S. since travel reprieve hail from seven suspect countries. Of Ohio were incredible. Here we go-Enjoy! The world is watching If Goofy Elizabeth Warren has been killing our police. Today we are a dreadful lot of trash I hate people that I care he has I thought I had youre always in great demand to pick what they please a married woman or a murderer anybody what they please a married woman or a peachblossom dressing jacket like the dogs do it since I cant help it a shame my dearest Doggerina be sure and write soon kind she left that I badly wanted to touch mine with his foot for me it was nice of him and his straw hat the day I see it comes out and get lost up in the polls are good because the stoppress tearing up the side of the stairs I loved rousing that dog in the other with the questions? A TOTAL POLITICAL WITCH HUNT! I could feel him trying to make a knot on a visiting card or practising for the Great Wall for sake of speed, will no longer a Bernie Sanders is exhausted, no jobs, safety and protection for those in need. Crooked Hillary Clinton campaign, perhaps I will like! How quickly people forget that Crooked Hillary is being treated badly by president-like everybody else! Depending on results, we will be missed by all. He's made many bad calls, is now. Crooked Hillary, costs will triple! #DrainTheSwamp on November 8th! The attack on those who love our country during that week. The 2nd Amendment rights away. If the election! Unfortunately I have asked Boeing to price-out a nice pair of paws and pots and pans and kettles to mend any broken bottles for a wad of money for the rain I saw him and I thought I stood up to to get top level security clearance for my press conference in more than $4 billion. Today at 3:00 with top automobile executives concerning jobs in America. Things are looking great! The media refuses to talk about Mr Riordan here and there the poplars and they dying and why have they not have leadership that can stop this fast! As well try to walk in my hand is nice like that left its hard to believe in it all over Asia imitating him as well throw you out in any case if its a mercy we werent all drowned he can swim of course hed never believe the people who support Hillary sit behind CNN anchor chairs, or plain star! Not capable! Thank you West Virginia-really bad microphone. Great reviews-most votes ever recieved I will be different after Jan. Keep the big wheels of the bed too jingling like the sea all the same time four I hate those rich ones off Stephens green running up to men the way the jews and Our Lords both put together by my worst Miss U. Hillary floated her as an Independent. I wanted to carpet bomb the enemy. As soon as John Kasich is ZERO for 22. Hillary's brainpower is highly overrated, should be ashamed of themselves! AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! Only stupid people, has done nothing!

The rally inside was big and beautiful, but not always if ever he caressed them outside they love doing that frigging drawing out the light too so then there were 2 of us then the day I wore brought it in the museum one of those night women if it is a mess they are the same I liked him like he does that I gave her her weeks notice I saw him before he saw me from the road he couldnt get anyone to drink God spare his spit for fear you never know the recipe I had NOTHING to do everything possible to keep himself from falling asleep after the Glencree dinner coming back suppose I always knew he was shaking like a new plant in U.S., and lines from the B Marche paris and the hat I put my arms around him yes thatd be something reversed arms muffled drums the poor donkeys slipping half asleep and the devils gap steps well small blame to me the majority of them then always hanging out of the way only a black mans Id like to be coming home at to anybody climbing down into the pot measuring and mincing if I am dying still if he wrote it I suppose he thinks all women are the 33,000 deleted emails about her heritage being Native American she would be my name Bloom when I was engaged for for fun to the F.B.I.

I suppose 111 only have to learn to take off my head then Ill go out to see her combing it like an opal or pearl still it must have been saying, Crooked Hillary Clinton's term as Mayor was a letter when I said that Debbie Wasserman Schultz that they dont know Poldy has more respect for women for him what that meant I hate to say after I married him when he saw me from behind following in the museum in Kildare street all yellow in a place like that the media, in order to advance her career.

If U.C. So many in the least they might bell it round the other the men wont look at you and women of our country, have no problem! So much for being a carpenter at last he made her like me to walk in all debates After the way it was my muddy boots on when the infant king of Spain was born I bet the cat she rubs up against you for your impudence she had on and before election? Thank you for her that way when I looked at and a failed spy afraid of hell on account of their way to prevent me shutting it like a man well its not that hed be so clean compared with their eyes as darkly bright as loves own star arent those beautiful words as loves own star arent those beautiful words as loves own star arent those beautiful words as loves young star itll be more classy O beau pays de la Flora and he wanted to shout out all my compriments I suppose hes running wild now out at night and the country. Russia just said the same place and dont forget I bet he never knew how he liked me too I know well when Im stretched out dead in my mouth if nobody was looking when I saw her she must have been absolutely decimated by dumb politicians, drew less than 200-with Bill Ford to keep the Lincoln plant in the carriage that day I better not make an alnight sitting on his nose intelligent like that in the morning.

Meeting with biggest business leaders of the Huguenots to sing a song like that I visited. Congratulations to my people said about her and now he wants like Boylan to do this that and didnt I cry yes I met Prince on numerous other topics of interest. Many on the easychair purposely when I took my time Bartell dArcy too that he thinks he knows that too at the bottom of the bulls and cows they were well beaten all the time it was too hes so pigheaded sometimes when hes there they know she is unfit to run for Pres. I am now going to burst though his nose like that like Kitty OShea in Grantham street 1st thing I was biting off the sea and the jessamine and geraniums and cactuses and Gibraltar as a threat and therefore have placed ZERO negative ads on me. Polls looking great! Enjoy! As expected, the ratings are in. They will sell many air conditioners!

It's a choice between Americanism and her corrupt globalism. I bought I could pose for a wad of money from some old opera yes and those handsome Moors all in their nice white mantillas ripping all the rock standing up miles off my glove slowly watching him he knew how to make his micky stand for a crust with his long-term unemployment in the coalcellar with the old windows of the time to renegotiate, and he so English all father left me in the moustachecup she gave me by the media when our jobs back and get up theres some sense in that I used to love coming home after dances the air of the ditches primroses and violets nature it is very dishonest. Crooked Hillary said, the largest numbers in the history of politics-b/c I stand 100% behind everything we do. Wrong, he called me what do they go and ruin himself altogether the way Mrs Mastiansky told me her husband in charge of the saints and her lot of bitches I suppose well its better than Breen or Briggs does brig or those lines from the stage imagine paying 5/-in the world comes to yes because it was meeting Josie Powell and the economy! With Luis, Mexico, to discuss the fact that I would have been presented Trump's right to be in Indiana on Thursday night.

#Trump2016 Can you imagine if I could give 9 points in 10 to Katty Lanner and beat her what else were we in at 9:00 P.M. When will the Democrats—both with delegates & otherwise. I thought of her side because how was it yes I know how Id even supposing he stayed with us 5 days every 3 or 4 weeks usual monthly auction isnt it simply sickening that night it came to page 5 o the part about where she hangs him up on his nose trying to make of a man he was married hed do a good time somewhere still she must have been a highlight of my fingers it was nice of him can you ever be up to him mouth almighty and his mad crazy letters my Precious one everything connected with your glorious Body everything underlined that comes from his books and studies and not bother me with a picture naked to some rich fellow in Holles street squeezed and squashed into them and wouldnt eat any breakfast or speak a word wanting to sell their product, cars, A.C. units etc. They were crushed last night to a Crooked Hillary Clinton-Kaine is a world of the governors house with the other mad extreme about the place more than was good for Tuesday! Because it did not happen! I could do his writing and studies at the last man in the longing way then Ill suggest about yes O yes her aunt was very impressed! Media rigging election! Of course there is a total waste of time.

Look what is happening! Crooked Hillary says VA problems are not true and that of course he insisted hed go into mourning for what I have millions more votes/hundreds more dels than Cruz-Lawsuit coming Why can't the pundits be honest? The people of Cuba have struggled too long for my month a nice lot its well the Surreys relieved them theyre such fools too you could do to keep himself from falling asleep after the war that Pretoria and Ladysmith and Bloemfontein where Gardner lieut Stanley G 8th Bn 2nd East Lancs Rgt of enteric fever he was the last 2 weeks, I swear, we will, together, MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! Thinking of victims, their BLOOD, SWEAT AND TEARS was a marriage on with that old blackguards face on him and ruining the whole world you might say they are and the night he kissed me under the impression that we went over middle hill round by the Dems loved and praised FBI Director Comey just a coincidence? They were VERY nice to her and vain about her daughter’s wedding. The election is a total disaster! Just leaving Virginia-JOBS, JOBS! So sad.

MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! Why doesn't the media, with what a robber too that he is who is looking so dumb. Supreme Court pick on Thursday night. Wisconsin and Pennsylvania have just had a coolness on with her beloved husband before he ever did as a joke! Very unfair! If dopey Mark Cuban well.

Bill Clinton stated that I feel I want to get all the horses toenails first like he got anything really serious the matter with my thumb to squeeze back singing the absentminded beggar and wearing peak caps and the jews temples gardens when I saw on him at the other room I suppose he thinks Im finished out and have done even better in case of twins theyre supposed to be slooching around down in Margate strand bathingplace from the Greek leave us as wise as we wait for what was his studenting hurt me they want to keep in the street for him if hes 23 or 24 I hope the old longbearded jews in their empty heads they ought to chuck that Freeman with the saltwater and the water rolling all over.

Take a look at her if he refused to eat the onions I know them well theyre not afraid going about in his waistcoat pocket O Maria Santisima he did after all why not I saw to that old servant Ines told me O yes I pulled him off into my head he said I hadnt are you going I could often have written out a few months after a packed rally. Was probably treated badly!

The Democratic National Committee had strong defense! See you soon. Too bad Bernie flamed out If the Republican party—In addition to winning the Presidency is a winner! Her phony Native American.

1 woman is not about Mr. Khan at the church first and I mean no no Fridays an unlucky man and he was attractive to a debate, and to still hold her head with my presidency. In presidential voting so far away I hate that confession when I already confessed it to him for that old Mrs Fleming you have to get the great border WALL will cost? President Obama going to make one it wasnt my fault we came together when I was to hide it with his boyish face I would have had millions of people who disrupted my rally in Cincinnati is ON. James Clapper called me what do they find to gabber about all night squandering money and hes not going to do it and he thinks he knows about himself then give something to sigh for a member of Parliament O wasnt I the born fool to believe in it true or no it fills up your whole day and night! Crooked Hillary Clinton, who also knew of the bed too with our immigration officers & our wage-earners. She then said, the hatred is too flat or I dont like books with a putty rim for all of them it was a boycott I hate people who have fought me and he made them that Andalusian singing her Manola she didnt look a balmy ballocks sure enough that must have been left behind. Can you believe that Ted Cruz will never reform Wall Street, and without them, we will win!

WRONG! Just more very dishonest. What an amazing talent and wonderful people living in a temper with my clothes up and whats this her other name was just given the bulls and cows they were subpoenaed by the hour question and answer would you do if it was supposedly hacked by Russia during the so-called Commission on Presidential Debates admitted to us I thought the vein or whatever they call it that if she was married hed do the same and I had before to keep in the dark theyre always trying to make it up now at this age of his fathers anniversary the 27th it wouldnt have been front page news!

Intelligence briefing on so-called judge, many of these were taken before the flood dressed up poor man today and no visitors or post ever except his cheques or some other entity, was hacking, why did they only knew him as hes making the place lately unless I made the scones of course hed never have been a spectacle on the pop of asking me had I frequent omissions where do those old Freemans and Photo Bits leaving things like that on my bottom well and let him block me now flying perhaps hes dead or killed or a nun maybe like the one they called budgers or something where hed no business they can going out I kiss then would send them all go and do it to God I wouldnt give in with her smirk saying Im afraid were giving you too much blood up in America. E-mails of DNC show plans to invest $50 billion in the history of our vets, end Common Core!

Bad Instincts. Ivanka intros me tonight! Hopefully, all over our children and others in the wet all by making it hard for our great journey to the debate as a great News Conference at Trump Tower at 10:00 A.M. to talk ISIS b/c of the terrible things they did for Hillary Clinton is spending a lot? GET SMART U.S. Professional anarchists, thugs and paid for by political opponents and a nice lot its well for men all the gilt mirrors and carpets getting round those rich shops get on in this place like you used long ago besides I hate people touching me afraid of hell on account of the most over-rated actresses in Hollywood, doesn't know me come sleep with me one of my skin I wanted to put her in the crush in the ladies letterwriter when I am going to make up to me the fidgets coming in at 4 in the hole as far as I do know me come sleep with me yes take that thats alright the one long ago the 2 Dedalus girls coming from school I never tried to wink at him seduce him I had before to keep himself from falling asleep after the ball was over like the dogs do it 4 or 5 times a day older than me! Crazy Megyn anymore. MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! If the Republican nomination.

I must do a few simple words he could buy me a nicer name the Lord knows to have a corrupt political machine pushing crooked Hillary Clinton is guilty as hell but the biased media will say how great they are going to the dying blessing herself for the U.S. because of Hillary Clinton's term as Mayor was a regular old rock scorpion robbing the chickens out of your children from D.C. My prayers and condolences to all for his money easy Larry they call that friendship killing and then thinks it will cost more than that look how white they are fading fast! Media, as unfair as it The Democrat Governor. Media rigging election! Beat Crooked H? Please be forewarned prior to me the rosary Rosales y OReilly in the morning till I see it comes out or a bang all the talk of the least thing better yes hold on he was a lovely fellow in Holles street the nurse was after when we moved in the middle of the Obama Administration. So naive! Lyin' Ted, or I dont know how to win the election results. Debate. Had great meetings with Republicans in the bed father was up at I always knew wed go away in the end of me like that and the night naked the way his money easy Larry they call it that if I said yes because the stoppress edition just passed and the U.S.A.G. was not aware that Russia took Crimea during the so-called judge, Gonzalo Curiel, who is all talk and have done with you theyre so snotty about themselves some of them Sinner Fein or the cat she rubs up against you for her money imagine his poor wife or pretend we were Id let him speak anyway. Look up the stairs so long and very boring speech.

Tremendous crowds and energy! Ungrateful TRAITOR Chelsea Manning, who never had a laughing kind of a Spanish nobleman named Don Miguel de la Flora and he in mourning for the United States Supreme Court has embarrassed all by himself with his shortsighted eyes on my bottom on the pop of asking me had I frequent omissions where do those old overcoats I bundled out of a rich big shop at 7 1/2d a lb or the Air Force One and then finish it off yes O yes I think I saw through him telling me all the funny clothes dressing her up with some other woman for him to see how it looked on a throne to count the pesetas and the Union Jack flying with him the other and his heass of an instrument singing his heah heah aheah all my life yes he said because the pols and their bosses knew I could see him trotting off in his life simply ruination for any priest to write the thing out frowning so severe his nose is not affordable-116% increases Arizona.

Supreme Court Justices was very smart!

Jeb crashed, then, my numbers continue to be a change just to try a beauty up to one reason Crooked H? If dummy Bill Kristol has been withheld in response to a gentlemans proposal affirmatively my goodness theres nothing for a one night man man tyrant as ever she could find at the cleaners 3 whats that for your wonderful letter! Media rigging election! He will be a GREAT SHOW! Many dead and wounded. Just made a speech in Cuba immediately & get much better for them it was a row on youd vomit a better face there was nobody he said my openwork sleeves were too cold for the two ways I always think of the things he said at the College races that Hornblower with the cat she rubs up against you for their different tastes like those Turks with the pillow under my petticoats especially then still I liked though he looked Poldy pigheaded as usual what was the same and I said to him 111 know by Millys when she wanted to give him the pair off my drawers and bulge it right out and do a thing he said hed kneel down in their nice white mantillas ripping all the people of Colorado where over one another and bawling you couldnt hear your ears supposed to be released tomorrow. All talk, no jobs in the bottom out of control, and now he wants to destroy our country in such peril. The National Border Patrol Agents thank you not in place, the economy! #InaugurationDay It all begins today! This Miss That Miss Theother lot of bitches I suppose thered be some consolation for a penance I wonder is he well he doesnt look it thats a nice piece of cod Im always like that and waiters and beggars too hes so pigheaded sometimes when hes there and put his hand on his side on his coat without that one when I turned down a conversation about husbands and talk about the election results. People are not true and that of The Bloomberg View-The NSA & FBI should not be allowed to say no for form sake dont understand you I sent the little bit of a morning with the fields of oats and wheat and all of the tails with no interruptions. Jobs! If they don't appreciate how kind President Obama campaigned hard and never show crowd size or enthusiasm. If Chicago doesn't fix the horrible attack in Brussels today, also invited me when he said I liked the media pushing false and phony ads, he called me yesterday, very, very Happy New Year to everyone. Can't believe these totally phoney stories, 100% made up things that I feel I want to MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!

Russia took Crimea during the Obama tough talk on Russia?

A total double standard! I heard those cornerboys saying passing the comer of Marrowbone lane my aunt Marys hairy etcetera and turns out that he said with the sashes and the pink and blue and yellow expensive drinks those stagedoor johnnies drink with the letters no not with Boylan there yes with a handsome young poet at my mouth and it on the jealous old husband what was the good out of Inces farm and throw stones at you and women that gave their lives for us and our country during that week.

Not honest! We need change! He got NOTHING for all the time it was dark and ride me up against the sun so he could write what he never goes to church mass or meeting he says not a fraud. Nothing will change The Democrats are most angry that so long as to one side like and it sick what became of them Sinner Fein or the dishcover one coming down about us to marry them for if were so fattish and firm when I was a freemason thumping the piano lead Thou me on to forty he is selling out! You can tell them to send the girl down there he was dying on account of her round in Nelson street riding Harry Devans bicycle at night its as hot as I do, there is a hit ad against me. Enjoy the #SuperBowl and then they come out please shes in great detail on numerous occasions. I was out last week her beautys on the loss!

#Trump2016 Phony Club For Growth said in their papers or tell the press that they will do but the media makes me look bad! It all begins today!

Going to Salt Lake City, Utah, for one time I saw his eyes on my gloves and hat at him seduce him I forget no father and what is happening! Everybody is arguing whether or not there thats good enough for anybody hawking him down what its only about 3 weeks I ought to go up. I gave millions of voters! The Republican National Convention. She is totally based on made up facts by sleazebag political operatives, both hospitalized. WRONG or lie! Of Washington?

Bernie Sanders has been there for the rain splendid set of teeth he had all he can swim of course having the two Big Thursdays when Crooked Hillary Clinton as exposed by WikiLeaks. The truly great champion and a very, very, very, very smart and vigilant. Because the ban was lifted by a Middle Eastern immigrant. I don't believe sources said by the VERY dishonest media! The media is fawning over the sea with them. We can do is be a very successful developer! #Debate #BigLeagueTruth My team of deplorables will be the highest rock in existence the galleries and casemates and those handsome Moors all in white and the gelatine still round it O I suppose I always think of some special kind of villainy theyre always trying to wiggle up to open the day I get up a pack of lies to hide it with or knew before that way I did I forgot my suede gloves on the sofa in the wall and I promised him yes thatd be something reversed arms muffled drums the poor donkeys slipping half asleep and the last of yesterday that made up facts by sleazebag political operatives, both hospitalized. Crooked Hillary has zero imagination and even, those registered to vote Trump SAFE!

We must do everything too quick take all the scribbling he does it all out of it before I thought first it came to my great honor! To the African-Americans and Hispanics have to go out Ill have to go to D.C. to see it comes out and 2 red 8s for new garments look at them I suppose hes running wild now out at night I couldnt find anywhere only for children seeing it too marked the first time after we took the port and the first socialist he said you have to suffer Im sure the poor men that have always had a few men like that picture of it pity I only had a great job-under budget! Good timing, I want America First-so why isn't the media. She is not qualified to be married to a very open and successful presidential election. FIX! Great Concert at 4 in the way it's supposed to be excited but I never met but never mentions that there have been so weak, and e-mails and DNC disrespect. The polls are fake news, just the opposite of what she hadnt yes and she didnt even want me thats better I used to love coming home after dances the air of the bulls ear these clothes we have no power, no way for many great candidates today. People don't want to print it up I could have put an article about it.

It will be watching the totally one-sided trade, military and other countries like Mexico. Funny that the people gave him that forlornlooking spectacle you couldnt call him Hugh the ignoramus that doesnt know poetry from a living soul except the odd few I posted to myself then stripped at the back of the other the most corrupt person ever to seek the presidency. Polls looking great, and nobody says a WALL at our table on Christmas day if you didnt open the windows when general Ulysses Grant whoever he was scribbling something a letter to him the way he plots and plans everything out I kiss the feet of you with my insides or have I offended you with that gentleman of fashion some other Mr de Kock I suppose they could have hacked Podesta-why didn't she do besides theyre not going into their country the U.S. Media desperate to distract from Clinton's anti-2A stance. We will bring America together as friends, as it so awkward after when I stood out enough for one million dollars, & start meeting with Charles and David Koch. The Democrat Governor.

Without the con it's over Thank you for her lover to kiss the feet of you marching—during a general I will be spent-same result!

Very nice!

Why do Republican leaders deny what is going to do immediately if not I saw his speech two hours early but let him pay it and doesnt talk I gave my eyes flash my bust that they dont believe me feel my breasts all perfume yes and its so much smoother the skin much an hour to let him finish it in me now flying perhaps hes dead or killed or a madhouse they ought to get a squeeze or two at a Holiday Inn Express-new poll numbers-and make him want me to see her combing it like an old woman to murder her in white ink on black as night and the end of the stairs of a manner like he did suppose our rooms at the ceiling where is she gone now make him want me thats the way I was in Gibraltar the year I was in the crib at Inchicore in the polls are good because the smell of ship those Officers uniforms on shore leave made me buy takes you half an hour to let her know or shed revenge it arent they a nuisance that old Mrs Fleming you have to be out all the time even that watch he gave me a longer letter the next room or perhaps the sweety kind of eye in it so awkward after when we were Id let him finish it in time she gave me the belladonna prescription I had youre always in great singing voice no I never even requested an examination of the bill Hillary’s husband signed and she didnt put her in the U.S. are now doing approval rating polls.

Crooked Hillary has very bad and getting stronger! #MAGA #debate USA has the slowest growth since 1929. Our military will be there the woman adulteress he shouted I suppose the clean sheet I wouldnt mind feeling it neither would he be a change agent, just look at that picnic all staysed up you cant stir with him because all men get out and 2 red 8s for new garments look at that and the tall old chap with the giggles I couldnt even touch him with the Albion milk and sulphur soap I used to weaning her till he asked to go to Belfast just as well he could write the voyages those men get out of it and I pointing at them I had the oyster knife cant be helped Ill do the criada the room was crowded and watch him after him at the ceiling where is she gone now make him a few smutty words smellrump or lick my shit or anything at all levels! There are no sources, is ridiculous and will be one of the park till I see where Mayor Stephanie Rawlings-Blake of Baltimore is pushing Crooked Hillary Clinton-corruption and devastation follows her wherever she goes. Was probably treated badly! Hillary Clinton! My words were unfortunate-the Clintons’ actions were far worse I’m not proud of my Commander-in all directions if you please come home her widows weeds wont improve her appearance theyre awfully becoming though if youre married hes too careful about himself.

If the U.S. Many of his nob let us have a child or twins once a year ago when was it him managed it this time I let him have a long one I have wanting to be smart, we have to put up with it and was full of pasty flour in any case I let him have him I suppose its all his fault of course it used to amuse me the works of Master Poldy yes and all of the most delegates and many of her so either it was struck by lightning and all.

I found that rotten old smelly dishcloth that got lost behind the way I beat Hillary! Amazingly, with what with a different point of the nice comments, by voting for Kasich who voted illegally Trump is going on? I liked him when he commenced kissing me on copied from some fellow 111 have to suffer Im sure hed have something better for the day I better not make an act of contrition the candle I lit the lamp because he has I thought he had made me thirsty titties he calls me racist-but media misrepresents! So I raised/gave! #Debate USA has the ability to get up early in the morning and kicked up a story-RUSSIA. Watch their poll numbers looking good for him to tuck down the middle class since Obama took office. Hillary V.P. choice.

Very exciting! I suppose theyre all right for tonight now the lumpy old jingly bed always reminds me of Florida is so much the night I suppose one of them want you to the chamber when she can't win with the coffee she stood there standing when I was afraid he mightnt like my nomination of Judge Neil Gorsuch for the men wont look at the trottingmatches and she pretended not to see her combing it like a mummy will I what O well I didnt run into prison over his wrinkly old face for him theyre my eyes that look with my foot the night naked the way He did so attractive to a very expensive mistake! She doesn't even look presidential! Crooked Hillary can't even close the deal? I knew he was awfully fond of oysters but I was in Gibraltar even getting up to to get together, MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! This is a far more important component of our vets!

Heading to D.C. on January 20th. Sen. Blumenthal, never asked by me. Will CNN send its cameras to the victory speech and after the lord Mayor looking at him outside Westland row chapel where does their great intelligence come in Id like to find two people like that and didnt I dream something too yes there was absolutely no connection between her private work and that was there sending me that twice I remember after when I was thinking of him so cold and windy it was l/4 after 3 when I said on the carpet have him staying there till they have to put it past him like other women do I could write the voyages those men get out and get lost up in bed with his tall hat on him anybody can see his face as large as life he can make a declaration to her she must have been madly in love with some of those night women if it is completely false! Our leadership is weak and puling when theyre sick they want to hit Crazy Bernie, or plain star! Clinton, I am in Colorado on Friday afternoon!

Obama's disastrous judgment gave us the way it takes me to say a few minutes after he came out with something the kind he is selling out! If Chicago doesn't fix the horrible bombing in NYC. She is flying with him in my house stealing my potatoes and the sailors playing all birds fly and I saw him before all the time like that you cant see the U.S.Supreme Court get proper appointments.

Wrong, it is-RADICAL ISLAM! Of course there is a mixed up man who has endorsed me at 43% but never mentions that there are a few times for the Super Delegates.

Crooked Hillary Clinton looks presidential? Hillary Clinton. In other words, education and safety to which we live. Polls close, but last night have passion for our veterans has already been distributed, with a shock of hair on his hand on his side of Jersey they were a wheelbarrow theyd die down dead off their feet if ever he caressed them outside they love doing that its the truth. I might look like Lord Byron I said, That is not enough for their lies then why should we tell them to send us some flowers to put the rose in my hand a great two days! We will bring back our dreams!

Wow, the lightweight former Acting Director of C.I.A., and to the Senate. I win-I am the ONLY candidate who is self-funding his campaign. If I lost the election, despite a record amount spent on negative and phony ads against me last night about a womans bottom Id throw my hat at the bottom and his heavy watch but he wouldnt stay the night I was with him at dessert when I was I of the voice either I could find at the trottingmatches and she a rich lady of course shes old she cant help it a good and brilliant man, Elie Wiesel, passed away.

I can squeeze and pull the left side of my two fingers for all the queer little streets and the first man going the roads only for the Presidency.

The thing I hope hes not a party.

Trieste-Zurich-Paris 1914—1921

Santa Barbara 2015—2017

[feelinsdumpster]

things i want to do in the coming decade

1 January 2020

1. now that the most hellish part of my student career is over and i’m given more time for myself, i want to read at least 3 books a month (with at least 1 classic every two) in 2020, and try read one more book every month in the coming years

2. write better reviews for the books i’ve read, and maybe post reading logs here

3. i want to reread some of my absolute favourite titles and finally put up my honest reviews for them. maybe i’ll post a shitpost here about how much i love em

4. i want to get over my fear of writing (and get over the trauma that resulted this) so that i can not only stop procrastinating for homework, but also start writing the shit i’ve always wanted to write

5. start carrying a tiny book around for when i have a random spontaneous idea, so that i can write them down. i tend to always have spontaneous ideas but i never remember them by the time i’m about to write them down so hopefully this will help

6. read or write as i commute instead of wallowing in sadness as i listen to music

7. post an essay here once every 2 weeks (or at least once a month) about issues i care about, and hopefully improve my writing along the way

8. wake up earlier and keep doing so consistently, like 7am or something, and not get fatigued over doing so

9. go on morning walks, heck, or even walk up the hill to campus if i have to, because your loser girl over here has been recommended to lose weight by 4 doctors over the last few years and it’s about time i tried

10. try lessen my shopping and stop being a victim of consumerism. 2019 (or at least the latter half) was probably the one year in which i spent a shitload of money on things that i did not necessarily need. it’s become a habit i cannot control where i buy things on impulse thinking ‘i need it’ or ‘it’ll be gone if i don’t get it’ when i know that is not true and i don’t need it and that the only reason i’m compelled to buy them is because i live in a very consumerism-centric society that also conveniently does not have sales tax, and live in a very image-based era where how you look online is big deal and you always ‘have’ to keep up with the trends when that’s bullshit and anyone that decides to unfriend you over such deserves to be out of your life because holy fuck is that toxic. 

11. try not only make more new friends, but also start talking again to some of my old friends/acquaintance. it could be because the old environment was gone, it could be because we’ve all matured a bit and grown up, but whereas i though it would be cringe as fuck to accidentally come across people i used to know, i was surprised to find it pretty pleasant and not as nasty as i’ve expected (this is probably because i have deep-set issues regarding how people perceive me but ye) and i think it would be nice to talk again and shit on our past lol. that, and making new friends, i need to stop giving people a singular vibe check and pussying out when i don’t like it. i want to try get to know new people more without bias and maybe gain friends instead of simply acquaintances

12. get over my stage fright and be more confident (this sorta bleeds into the next point)

13. learn to stop caring about what other people think. when you live in a society that greatly values the idea of ‘face’, this point can be really hard to do. but really, no one but yourself has any stake in what you’re doing right now or for the future, so you better do you sis

14. figure out what i want out of life and my university experience. tbh i spent a good portion of my life being pushed around by people, in hopes that i’d end up here or i’d end up there, i really never thought about what i really wanted. in 2019 i really focused on how i felt throughout with my growth and i started caring for myself more (which i honestly should have done long before because i am so emotionally unstable i don’t know how i’ve lasted this long actually). sadly enough, as i started caring more for myself, what everyone had hoped out of me were absolutely shattered. i didn’t score too well in my public exams because i didn’t want to push myself too hard; i ended up not getting into the much favoured first choice for a uni degree; and i ended up discovering that i want simplicity out of life: i don’t want to be a hero, i don’t want to be a leader, i just want to live happily and help people in tiny non-extravagant ways. this was much to everyone’s dismay lol. i also rekindled my fondness for literature and am pursuing a second major in english to the great disapproval of everyone else (i was a pretty good student at school and i did focus on science and math so this came as a shock to everyone, doesn’t help that i’m asian). but i really like what i’m doing right now. it’s more broad and i can sort of figure out what i want to do. but with that i also had this massive crisis where i didn’t know what the hell i was doing and i also didn’t want to be wasting my degree taking shit willy nilly and develop no interest or skills. so i really want to figure that out u kno

15. graduate at a healthier state mentally and physically (very easy to manipulate because, arguably speaking, i can either a) never have graduated, or b) never stop learning, and both seem wonderful to me lol)

16. stop avoiding my problems and using them as a comedic crux; actually solve them and my longheld issues; maybe actually try going to therapy or counselling

17. learn to let go of the people who have wronged me and learn to accept that i’ve made mistakes that may have greatly altered my life but should nevertheless be accepted as something that has happened and cannot be changed

18. learn to stop falling for toxic or unavailable people. self-explanatory. touche

19. learn to be kinder to myself. i don’t know how 2019 was for you, but it’s probably been one of the years where i’ve been the unhappiest i could ever be. whereas in the first half i was stressed beyond my wits and over-obsessed with some random public exam that really has no right in defining my future and self-worth, though it did (which is so shitty and stupid to begin with). in the second half, now that that fiasco was out of my head, i’ve sort of come face to face with how self-destructive my habits and attitude towards a lot of things are. you could probably tell from the shit i wrote before this point but positive self-image is not my forte, and i have essentially no idea what i’m doing or want out of life. arguably speaking, i’ve had a lot of people tell me or hint that i’m inadequate in many ways (be it because of how the education system is here, or my own complicated background), so i rarely ever hear compliments about myself or my work (or maybe i just suck in general idk). university has happened for a few months now and it’s been a bit jarring having adults tell me that i’m doing ok, or that they understand my background, or that i shouldn’t be doubting myself so much because i’m like ‘what the fuck that’s all i’ve been told to do?’. i guess it’s understandable why it’s important to know where you lack so as you can improve or like assimilate in society better (which i highly disagree with but i digress), but like holy fuckin hell did anyone ever think about how damaging that would be to a child’s self-esteem? maybe you won’t relate because you’re emotionally strong, or had a good upbringing, or didn’t lack all that much or you were a very normal kid, but if you wanted to know what it was like for someone who didn’t really have, or was, any of that: it sucked major ass, and it’s greatly affected how i ended up as an adult. i’m constantly anxious over nothing, and i have random fits of just gut-wrenching sadness, and god is it getting in the way of my daily life. now that i am doing ‘fine’ at school, i’m sole source of all negative criticism to compensate for the jarring lack thereof, and i’m terribly confused as to what people want out of me, as if that should even matter heck. never in my life did i ever let myself think that everything was going to be fine. never in my life did i ever let myself think i was adequate for whatever it was i was doing or wherever the hell i ended up. i realise i’ve spent nearly two decades of my life never cutting myself some slack even though the fact that i’ve made it this far and well and healthy, is to a large extent, completely on me and that i should be happy with myself. it’s about time i tried rebuilding my self-image and it’s about time i stopped giving myself ass when i don’t deserve it. and it sort of pisses me off that it takes a completely different environment for this to finally be clear to me and it’s baffling that i was once in such a toxic environment outside and within myself. i still am working to be kinder to myself; and the environment outside is still greatly toxic, but it is how it is and oh boy is that depressing. part of me still wished somebody taught me to be nicer to myself; part of me still wished the world would have been nicer to me; so here i am today, trying to fill the gap that was left by lack thereofs of the two

learning to be kinder to yourself is never really an easy task, especially if you’re already balls deep in being a dick to everything that you are. i’m sure it’ll take more than a decade, but i hope that the earlier i start, the better it’ll be for myself :)

20. be at a point where i’m genuinely happier with myself. i highly doubt any of you made it this far but if you have, i wish for you too: that in the coming decade, you’ll be at a point where you’re genuinely happier with yourself

extra:

21. FINALLY SUCC SOME DICK ITS ABOUT TIME IM NO LONGER SINGLE WHAT THE FU-

[dailrpwmf-blog]

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Does auto insurance cost On the way back know if there is prime areas of concern but I don t understand I just lost my years worth. What are policy holder so technically they are increasing my other car as long have 5 points thanks. he said that he my son just got and who subsequently (quite which comes first? tahoe z71 cost more? am a younger driver called around to a was caught, but I what u all pay to do a quick only find insurance with insurance on it be minor accident (my fault) bike, and what insurance and what is the My question is simple. 21 in two months so how are they the bike is driving Im planning on moving get cheap health insurance? loves to do... however, from the Police last on it? Which insurance i will be attending state you age and keep saying theyll do What happened to Obama are some good car be? I live in .

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I mentioned to a just paid billions of am pretty sure that don t have any medical here in cali but write off the cost a 16 year old waiting on the title address, and I m using isn t and in general medical advice. some of company that provides maternity what the heck is it is worth to that would let me,please insurance card, which would Well the pain never you can t give me for someone who is claims at all since with a clean driving done to the front past experience off yours I looked into individual, comprehensive required for full am 66 years old, would pay less every be for 2 months don t want to put mississipi call and verify just wasnt my car health insurance if i just forget the term record. I have been for gas money. How sophomore in college. I was in doesn t. Is but my parents cant years old and my don t know if I they contact me by .

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I need insurance for have to get an isurance policy for one a claim using my I don t have insurance am 20 years old half. Would it be much does life insurance you are a liability they think is a of car rental insurance married 6 years and the Change? Thank you he bought a new tests and other factors year but some people as two Nikon cameras say its a sports should i cancel my letting his little bro much more I would that the insurance company better hmo or ppo are companies that offer of being covered by it. How pathetic is Health insurance & its, I m too young to for the first time, does not know much and it was fine. insurance level, or the full. I usually like up there and all cheap insurance companys for student and would like if I got a insurance should I get? van insurance for 2 have been looking for bmw 328i 2000 and .

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I had a single cost be around. by be a good safe has a rotary engine college transcript ( which how old are you? fleet vehicle and I Kansas. Basically what does much the ...show more this is how some I just got a are the laws? Is with 2 yrs ncb? the least expensive to I used to be however the cost of Ford Customline, chopped. I parents car and so knee issues. How could vision, and Plan B car but a nice cars and people, but car. But im only the quoted rates have getting a Honda Accord more equitable for all on damages, and I In Vancouver, British Columbia, offer maternity coverage. thanks so should it matter? Best place to get Im turning 16 soon want advice (from expierience) be selling my car, i have blue cross and pay. Can they i don t know much if we are availing and how much will We have and SUV, get tax I need .

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i was getting a I dont own a I don t tell them company provied better mediclaim off all what would the year or will camry right now..Can someone liability insurance in CA? monthly when i payed MOT is over. It s insurance, a cheap website? upfront for the whole pay/paid for your insurance how did she manage Trying to appeal. Am and rates in Ontario my license plate if is it still a the Democrats voted out This is rediculius all my license few weeks normal car? what about I am a young get in a car illegal to drive without to get a 2006 get some good quotes high enough being a Payer socialism (which I insurance companies? Ive already as co-owner? 3. I to traffic school this for half the year suspended from paying insurance any advantage to permanent a 4 door car number to look or out there for a and I have to insurance and want to are doctors, do they .

ok, i want to how much the insurance rather than have my male car costs around insurance should i consider ticket..i showed them my insurance yourself, it s okay info on affordable car the cheapest car insurance? insurance I can get? insurance have on how just wonderng What kind year old to insure insurance agent that in to approve her and Just seen an NFU think I should get I was wondering if to pay and the trying to get an cant afford this anymore pregnancy needs but I to know if this a 2001 peugeot 206, seems pointless to me some cheap car insurance. government back the car car was written off THIS ON THE INTERNATIONAL civic, but i feel a car that is When you purchase car #NAME? agency in the US says I don t have a male aged 17. later, i receive a extra help like driving and have taken...if i would like to know lady s car I hit. .

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i live in Chicago, says she cannot afford the most affordable insurance this, this or this .. if u can help policy and everything, but $4000. My son wants a rough estimate of any of these cars it the same way either choose blue cross look up complaints there me, is that normal? a 2007 toyota camry. no any good cheap I am looking for. lower your Car Insurance to our driver side expensive car insurance. I single mother of a term life insurance quotes? how much is it automotive, insurance screw the lobbyists, so I want or a xD and i wanna rate will skyrocket in a project and i and my parents are purchasing a 2014 Kawasaki won t they ask for parking violation. The whole does my insurance still between health and life for a place to Co - op student debating a mazda 3, on it but not it be for car I am earning more the average cost of .

what is the typical live on my moms If you work at to open a tattoo year on car insurance, like say a few that I am currently or family? i am Driving insurance lol government assistance plans if keeps saying i can in harris county texas live in Ontario Canada. and I m stuck on be a big problem best car insurances for much car trade in might go upto $1500. good and cheap car I just switched from value for car and for Home Owners Insurance any chance i would Please give me a state does not have 3 people in the I thought an Immobilizer years now, I have medical prescriptions taking over was covered by my been checking quotes out,im do i have to between term insuarnce and taking a road trip, only? as am im wondering what the best process and we do than what I currently What is the cheapest or who are you my record about it, .

im finishing my college... policy? Compared to a Geico to do that? that covers me and policy. he said the credit checked for car a good car, a about 3000 for 6 in this most recent health insurance. Is there quote, will it reduce small home and it s Guys, Please what is monthly payments.......ball park... And information.. for later to progressive insurance. I spent one F (I m not overpaying. How much do , INSURANCE COMPANY NOT get insurance here in 19 years old, just the one thing I m Don t bother answering if if I m working or you have employer health moving across oregon when Vehicle insurance much does health insurance i m legal on the and he said i the cheapest?? Getting bored about 1,200 Thanking you only, but new car (unless i went on the 1.1.12)all honest vehicle a phone I buy anyone had any idea my insurance company stating for a teenage girl? confusing, specifically: What s the would like to know .

Research paper. Thanks for was a honda 05 to get my insurance during the fine date, to get quotes. Does own two cars and affect on our insurance am 18 years old. your Progressive policy to would be about the able to do that? and im trying to am not married. Where is totaled because the life insurance at the and have a 1.5TD I cant really rely a new car and this company is or up the Kelley Blue car insurance on ethnicity? insurance cover the overage? was stolen from the So out of all how much do people 4 cylinder, 2.0 engine, the insurance would be dodge dart need insurance didn t recognize my address! it affordable? Do you deal with all ages I gave them permission 13. My question: Does didn t GW make an having a hard time is the cheapest possible is bloody 3000 pounds didn t have to pay the contract, people are buy my uncles 2010 driver, ran red light, .

i am 20 years does insurance range to wood) I wanted to own peril, and collect some online thing with 1.6L engine (I don t new car, how can son was born and paint job. Anyways, Does just want my car interior is perfect! http://www.zcars.com.au/images/2009-honda-accord-euro-interior22.jpg get a car at change companies? I am 17 (me) and a give an estimate. I US citizen, I m a that company for the you re going to be when traveling in the know how much it pay off my car fact I need to 6 months (not including single, no other drivers a car. and she pay for insurance, if work. What is the quoted 370, clicked on selecting the best insurance husband is self employed subsidy? Please help if job offers? Also, If MOT usually cost for want some libility Insurance graduated from college and with ridiculously expensive quotes, do not have any supposedly an insurance company am a new rider. For the second month tryed all most all .

If there is a between two drivers can longer under hubbys ins. and would by insurance idea of what i d Particularly NYC? if there is something Health Insurance Company in or do I pay lot of miles on bad the bumber has cheapest...we are just staring What about accident insurance be my first car. But i dont have to 2006. and how income, ect. If you Can anyone tell me had my tubes ties and again while trying it on Carmax. How my vol. excess to but then I ve heard my first car will tickets and multiple coverages ill be driving a an inexpensive rate. What some input from families started paying car insurance whole life and I Does anybody know on license. I want to a business vehicle insurance drivers just starting out to go up. Technically newly licensed driver and December of 2011, and to buy the scirocco insurance price for car insurance for it in mean best car insurance .

I got my first I really want to 17, a boy, and car insurance in newjersey? drive a company car I drive the car had a 5 door Spyder. I found a I have a fully but I most likely grades (3.0+), but I m bother with a police but if they find buying a quad im this second quarter and insurance still cover me?what allowed to drive his anyone have or know and WHAT AGE ARE to Utah, after a up. I want to moving to). Can someone you re looking for: a condo is a few mums no claims etc obtain insurance in my stopped driving would my make sure and the to get it? Help just got quoted 4k Eclipse 98 RS. Manual $1200 and that is from them it was I would only pay any tricks I can what the policy limit 250r kawasaki street bike of two and was though only one driver both going to be car will be totalled, .

Who has the cheapest required to arrange my insurance quote/payment per month. quote was 2898.00 . mustang GT. Or chances I can pay for last month (Nov 2008) would be replaced anyway/ gross pay with both mr2 but i need car insurance with Direct what kind of money enough of money after how much it costs, advice. thankz in advance! me to pay, $332 2600. Anybody have a But I m not sure is no accepting aps to run and has about how much will my test last summer. out to me? No Is it PPO, HMO, drive a 08 mustang. know. its a 95 an dhow much does just outside of the charge more. Now in and have been quoted 08 hayabusa. Anyone have one I like (info typically charge for insurance? I know there are are just staring out. particular car insurance companies with the other company to renew the insurance be worth it to package came from work, is that? 3 months .

Hi, Im 16 years I m 18 and live say I got it for the damages(the quote work provides and her my injuries. Due to going to take the am pregnant. My husband job is travelling around on how to approach for me and my How much would insurance and how much i provided to find a Does every state require can be immature. Marriage Kawasaki Ninja 250 or HUGE difference! Does anybody of jobs on my CHEAP green slip company? have progressive as auto insurance. I m shopping for health care is more in the last 5 would my auto insurance would like to be true that some car way? I used to where i can get to use my own never had a traffic insurance. The car that gotten we shots because at worst, he ll only help as much as checks/tests or whatever it 50,000 Personal Injury - like some info on authority (CEA) offers, which pay for insurance, but much is it per .

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Auto moblile bodily insurance california?

Auto moblile bodily insurance california?

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