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russellsppttemplates · 5 months

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Straight from the heart (Lando Norris)

It takes a bad race for Lando to notice how much he has neglected your relationship, and he can only hope he can fix it

Note: english is not my first language. I was fighting the other piece I was writing so I jumped to this one and I did something a little bit different (* cough cough * longer) and see how it goes! I'm not sure how good this is (or how much you will want to kill me), but I promise this has a happy ending!! 🥹🫶

Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated 🤍 and I'm taking requests so if you have any ideas or concepts you want to share, feel free to do so as I'll try to get to them the best I can!

my masterlist

Tw: relationship struggles, curse words

Tag list: @myloverjk-blog @hiireadstuff @c-losur3

The result on the screen was not the one you hoped. Lando had a wonderful race, but a mixture of bad strategy calls, dark rain clouds appearing on the sky with only a couple of laps left to finish the race and the wrong tire compound made him lose a good number of places, cars overtaking him in the last seven laps.

"Is the race over?", you mother asked as she stepped inside the living room, carrying the curtains she had left out to dry and proceeding to hang them back in their place.

"Yes, just now", your father said as he adjusted the volume on the TV, "let me help you, darling", he offered, getting up and standing beside your mum in case she got out of balance.

"Are you going to call Lando?", your mother asked once her squinty eyes read the position he had finished in. Even though the prescription glasses were on the table, she insisted she didn't want any mishaps after she accidentally dropped her last pair while she was gardening and one of your younger cousins found a rusty frame a couple of months later when he was over.

"I'm not, I don't think - he's flying back tonight and the timezone is so different, I don't want to bother him", you blurted defensively, making up excuses as you went along with your answer, "he's doing the interviews, and I'm sure the debrief will be long and torturous - he will need his rest to fly back", you stated as you got up, "I have to check on the project I handed in on Friday, the professor said he would post the grades around this time and if we want to appel, we have to do it right away - I'll be in my bedroom".

The subject was an open wound that stung everytime you so much heard a mention of it, let one having to seem completely okay with it when it ripped through your heart.

The calendar on your wall is full of stickers, both with notes, urgent matters and things you couldn't forget. It's the last stretch, you tell yourself, one more week and then it's done and you'll have a well deserved break.

A knock on your door catches your attention as you reply with the allowance to let whoever is on the other side in, "is something wrong?", you asked. Lately, the negative side of your mind was the first one to speak.

"That's what I want to ask you - that conversation we just had downstairs was not your usual self", she sighed as she pointed to the living room, "I've noticed you haven't mentioned him much, but I don't want to intrude or offer my help because I know you don't like meddling", your mother looked for your eyes before you could fully focus on the wooden floor.

"Things have been rough between us lately", you sighed, "Lando is keeping me at a distance, and I don't know the reason why, mum", you shrugged, "I don't know if it's because I've known him all my life and the comparison is so profound, but it seems he only cares about racing and his friends, and I'm nowhere in the mix. We rarely call eachother, no texting - I know the triple headers are intense, but all I got from him were reactions to my stories and a little video from Max where he's in it and said something to me", you recalled, "I can't be the only one making an effort, can I? Either he realised where this is going and we catch it while we can, or I don't know where this is going, I don't know where we're going".

Your mother's heart broke as she saw you allow the tears you had held on to fall freely, your sleeves bunched up on your hands to wipe them, "and have you talked about this? A long, grown-up and serious conversation?", she mused.

"We have barely been with eachother, mum!", you whispered shakily as more tears got caught on your throat.

"Couples go through phases, darling - do you think me and your father was all smooth sailing?", she tried to get you to smile as she brushed your hair while she hugged you, "you need to talk to eachother, seriously and let it all out, nothing is off limits because that's how you'll get to where you need to".

You kept your head on your mother's chest, accepting her comforting hold despite being an adult. A mother's hold was truly the best.

You hoped she was right and this was something that would pass. A rough patch that you and Lando would work through a look back on with a sense of accomplishment.

This wasn't how you and Lando end, is it?

Max and Lando headed for the plane as soon as they left the race track, having made prior arrangements to had their luggage there waiting for them once they arrived. Max was the first to sit down and get himself comfortable on the seat, texting his girlfriend to let her know they were leaving.

"Y/N hasn't called or even texted me, nothing", Lando mumbled, "didn't she watch the race? Doesn't she know that I need her?".

Max weighed in the good and the bad that his next few words could do. He could either be honest and encourage his best friend to finally come to his senses, or keep covering the lie and perpetuate the suffering and miscommunications.

"This is not how I wanted to do this - truth be told, I never wanted to have to do it", Max rambled off.

Lando was quick to notice that there was more to it than just this instance, "you know something - she's my girlfriend, Max, if something is happening, I deserve to know", he said in an antsy tone.

"Are you really so blind to it? Have you not noticed it yet? Damn it, Lando, I've been on your side, trying to clean it up and now I'm questioning it", Max declared as Lando only grew more confused.

"What am I missing Max?", Lando snapped, even catching his own self off guard at the reaction he had.

"Mate, think about the last couple of months and whether or not you have been a good boyfriend, or even the boyfriend Y/N deserves", Max offered.

Lando wasn't expecting that answer or point of view.

The last couple of months roll through his memory as if he's watching a movie and when he tries to select the moments he spent with you, he finds himself struggling to gather any at all. He can't remember any of the times you spent together, and considering his memory isn't that bad, it could only mean those moments didn't even happen. Thinking about it, he can remember the last time he held you in his arms, just the two of you.

"Fuck!", Lando shouted, punching the arm rest.

"Glad you figured that one out almost all on your own", Max tsked, "do you really think you deserve any interaction from Y/N? Thought so", Max muttered. He didn't like the situation his friends found themselves in, and he certainly didn't feel any joy in the words he told Lando, but the truth wasn't always easy to hear.

"Seems Y/N doesn't think so either", Lando mumbled, "do you know anything? Has she told you anything?".

He wasn't sure he deserved to know, but he needed to.

"The last time I spoke to her she didn't say anything - you know how Y/N doesn't want to bother anyone with her things and getting information from her is harder than solving the world's problems -, but P and her talk here and there", Max reasoned, "she obviously won't tell me all the details but from what I can tell, Y/N has really taken a toll because of this, P is always quite upset whenever it comes up", Max offered. Quite upset wouldn't cover it, so much so that, unbeknownst to Lando, the last couple of time Max's girlfriend couldn't join them for their plans was an orchestrated excuse from her to avoid being in the same room as the McLaren driver.

"Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!", Lando groaned into his hands, "how could I not realise this was happening?".

"You want the honest, blunt truth?", Max asked and Lando nodded, "I know it's your job, but lately, it's all been about racing, and I think you've neglected Y/N ", Max offered.

McLaren had a one hundred and eighty degree turn lately. From struggling to get their cars in the points, the team had managed to turn things around to the point where P5 and P8 was considered a bad weekend for them.

With the new signings, Quadrant had grown exponentially and it had naturally drawn him to spend more time on it, and it seemed to have alienated everyone in his life that wasn't directly a part of those.

It wasn't intentional, but it didn't mean that it didn't hurt. And by the looks of it, the person Lando loved and cared about most was also the one he hurt the most.

They both sat in silence as the British drive thought about all of it. Things got so good that he didn't look back, he worked his hardest and gave every piece of himself to the cause and the new territory he was paving. Being on the podium was a common feature for him, and the race win was there, up for grabs and he wanted it. Yet, he had been dazzled by it and had let himself fly higher, his characteristic "both head and feet on the ground" posture no longer present and resulting in a degree of neglection for the things and people thay mattered to him.have always been important to me.

"How did I push away the most important person in my life and I'm just now realizing this?", Lando asked, not really expecting an answer, but rather to let out all the frustration that boiled inside him, anger soon following at his late realisation, "what's worse is that I've only come to realise this because you had to tell me - stupid, stupid, stupid".

"I don't know what you want me to tell you, mate, and frankly there isn't much I can, but look on the bright side: now you have a chance to fix it", Max tries to comfort Lando.

"What if it's too late? What if Y/N doesn't want to be with me anymore?", Lando voicesd his deepest fear. What if the anger had finally got to you and you wanted to call it quits?

"Wouldn't you be able to understand that? I don't think that is the case - I've never seen two people who love eachtoher more than you two, it's as disgusting as it it lovely most times. And even though she might feel angry or hurt, I believe she has it in her to forgive you", Max states.

"I hope you're right", Lando sighed as he tapped his phone, his finger hovering over your contact.

"I wouldn't do that", Max chirped, "you should rest before diving into anything about that topic, and today has had too many emotions as it is. Tomorrow is a new day for you to think about it", he advised.

With his head on the headrest, Lando went over everything that occupied his mind, allowing the heavy sinking feeling to settle in. To a degree, he deserved the discomfort he felt. Shame, guilt, frustration, remorse, embarrassment, overwhelm, sadness.

What if he had destroyed the thing that made him the happiest? If I managed to single out the person who loved him for him?

Lan 🧡

Hello. You were probably expecting a text or a call, but the last few days haven't been easy and I needed to ground myself a little. We really need to talk, Y/N. Do you think we can grab lunch today?

It irritated you how quick your heart was beating the minute you saw who sent you the text after you submitted all the projects that you had left. Battling an inner fight of whether or not you should answer it, you decided to so it. Rip the band-aid off, Y/N.

To Lan 🧡

Hello... We do urgently need to talk. I'm on my own today - where do you want to go?

Your tone was cold and unusual when you compared it to the older messages, filled with hearts and the pet names you had for eachother.

We can go to that café by the marina, the one with the paninis you really like.

Yes, we'll meet here at one pm.

Do you want me to pick you up?

No, I'll walk.

Your sunglasses are good enough to hide the nervous gloom on them as you walked to the marina. There is no script or guideline to go about this lunch other than honesty and finally admitting everything you were feeling. It could go either way and, truth be told, you believed it would go down the way it was supposed to.

Stepping on the wooden path to the small café's outside area, you looked for the boy whose arms were where you used to feel safe.

Lando chose a table that overlooked the water, the warm sun shinning and bringing out the blue of it. It would be a big conversation, and while the café wasn't crowded, he never knew how things could pan out so he went for the most demure spot.

When you take a proper look at him, it surprises you. His eyes are not shiny like they usually are - there's a dark hue surrounding them along with sadness.

"Hey", you utter out to grab his attention.

The moment he faces you, you feel naked despite the summery dress you have on. All vulnerabilities exposed for the person who knows you best and who can read you like the back of his hand.

"Hello, hi", Lando cleared his throat, "how have you been?".

Setting your bag on the chair, you shrugged, not ready to engage in casual chit chat.

"Do you already know what you are having?", he wondered.

"The italian panini and iced tea", you mumbled after looking at the menu he handed you, "have you ordered yet?", you mused before calling the waiter to do so.

The silence between you after the waiter left the table was painful and hard to digest. You avoided looking at his colourful eyes - once you did it, breaking down would be in an instant.

"We really need to talk, Y/N", Lando says.

"Do you want to go first? Or shall I?", you asked bitterly, accepting his silence.

The waiter comes back with your orders. The café doesn't have a big menu and it's mostly empty, so the service was quick, "I hope you enjoy it - Bon appétit!", he interrupted the tension filled moment.

"I recognise I need to apologize to you for all the things I did without realizing it an-", Lando was cut off by you.

"Let me stop you there before this derails", you stated, "I'm here to have a serious, grown up conversation, so I'm not going to sit here and listen to dusty and beaten up childish excuses".

If the ground could sink him into it, Lando would've accepted it gladly.

"It's a start that you have realised that something was wrong, but you can't excuse yourself like that, Lando. Not when this situation has taken proportions that you can't fanthom - you can't get away with being sorry for not noticing what you were causing", you argued.

Lando gave you a nod, "I'm still not sure about all the things that led us to this point and what it entails, and that's why I wanted you here. I don't want to be blind to it anymore - I want to get all of it so all the pieces make sense in my head. You probably won't believe it, Y/N, but I'm so lost in this. I feel like I've lived a parallel universe for the past couple of months", Lando added all in one go.

"When did your feet come back to the ground?", you mused, "when did you feel like maybe things weren't the way they should be?". The curiosity was killing you, and the answer could very well do the last stab.

"When I lost all of those places in the race", Lando gulped, "I expected you to call and to hear your comforting words, and they never came. Max was the one to bring my mind to the matter", he admitted and you could see he was the opposite of proud of his own actions, "How I've been the worst boyfriend in the world and how I deserved that you didn't call - hell, I'm not even sure if I deserve that you're here today and willing to listen to what I have to say".

It's difficult to maintain a tough appearance and pretend that his words don't affect you, but alas, you keep your armour on.

"That afternoon was a struggle for me, Lando. I wanted nothing more than to call you and hear your voice, silence your cornerns and negative thoughts, let you know that you're the best driver out there and that a bad race doesn't define you. That it wasn't your fault and that you shouldn't beat yourself up because of it, that I was still so proud of you and how you handled things and that nothing could keep me from shouting to the rooftops. But you didn't deserve it, my dignity has been punched by your actions day in day out for the past couple of months and I couldn't take it anymore".

"I need you to hear things from your side, I need to know your perspective so I can understand what I did wrong and if I'm able to fix it still", Lando asks desperately.

"We should start from the beggining then", you laced your hands on top of the table after taking a bite of your panini, "I think it was at the end of the last season - at the time it didn't seem like it, but looking at it now, it was the start. I even took some time off and travelled with you so we could enjoy your break, then I came back for university. It's never easy, I know, but up until then we never had any issues with it - even if it was a bloody run, we made time for eachother. Then, you barely texted, let alone call - but all relationships hit rough patches and I thought that it was ours. Then Christmas came around and we finally felt like us again, there were no work or uni commitments, and it was bliss. After that, life happened again and I couldn't find a way to spend time with you - there was always a Quadrant video to film or a meeting or some event. You, Max and Martin went to Bali, and despite the fact that I didn't have any exams and could easily do university stuff remotely - like I do everytime - you didn't even think to ask me if I wanted to go or if I had planned something for us in the first place. I just took it for granted that you would spend it with me, but when P showed me the photos I looked like a fool and an ungrateful friend and girlfriend because I stayed back, Lando. I never felt so humiliated. Max had his girlfriend and you didn't, you ignored me as if I didn't matter to you", you breathed out. Ruminating was one thing, talking about it out loud was another. The latter angered you less and hurt more.

"I'm sorry", Lando murmured and you were quick to shoot it down.

"I don't need you to apologize now, Lando. What I needed was for you to make a decision then, one that considered me and what I wanted", you sighed, wiping a stubborn tear that got out, "after that, I just watched you pull further and further away, and I tried to get closer, work things out, but you wouldn't let me in. You floated and floated and I stayed here, both feet glued to the ground as I watched you go higher and higher. You were never like this, letting things get to your head wasn't something you ever did, but it happened. You alienated me in such a way that for this triple header, I didn't hear your voice once unless it was from the TV or the McLaren social media. You only wanted to call when you needed comfort, and it hurts that it took Max to help you see things the way they are", you state as tears fell uncontrollably down your cheeks.

Apart from your earlier bite, both wooden serving boards look full and no one made a move to go further.

"You told me time and time again that you would always be there for me, but when I was the one needing a cuddle and reassuring words, I was all alone in my bedroom, crying because of you. When you said you'd be there for me, I guess you failed to account for the fact that you can't protect me from yourself.. Because what hurt me these past couple of months was you", you declared, sniffling and, finally, looking into Lando's swollen and tear-filled eyes.

The tears Lando has been holding back fell. He was angry with himself, at how he had done the one thing he promise not to do to you. He made you hurt, he was the reason you were in pain and he couldn't keep you from feeling it.

"I wish I could tell you there was a reason behind it and that it all has some justification, but there isn't and I can't lie to you. I was propelled from the results and the promise that this could be our year - my year - and everything else faded away. I know it's not any help, but I'm not proud of what I did, and definitely not proud of the way I made you hurt - I wish I could turn back time and do it differently", Lando confessed.

"I needed you, Lando", she bit back.

Lando couldn't find any words after that and once you began eating the now cold panini, he followed your movements, granting you the quietest meal you ever shared with him. Lando was playful, loud, cheery and giggly on any other day. As much as it nagged you that your words were the ones to dim that light, you had to put yourself first. Someone had to.

"Can we walk along the marina?", Lando asked once you finished eating, earning your nod to his surprise.

You both get up, Lando paying for your meal at the front before you left the establishment. You walked along, looking at the luxurious boats and yachts before you found a part of the wall that you was comfortable enough to sit on, remaining in silence as you watched a couple of people unlock their yachts and sailing away.

Lando wanted to say something, to prove to you that he was sorry and that he still loves you more than anything, but the fear of saying the wrong thing and hurting you even deeper was not something he wanted to risk.

"You're going to break up with me, aren't you?", Lando voiced the biggest worry on his mind since he left his apartment.

"I walked here, so I had time to think about all of this, and all I could think was that I was going to meet you there, be reminded of all the pain you made me feel, and then we wouldn't see a solution to this. And on my way here, it got harder because I passed by the shop where we always go for croissants, and then that park where I tripped and you carried me home because of my bruised knee even though I could walk just fine, the bench where that lady asked if Mila was our daughter when your brother visited. And when I arrived at the café and saw you, I knew there was no way I could do it", you half smiled.

"I struggled to see what was happening, and I didn't see what was clearly in front of me, and I know I can't undo all of the crap that I've made", Lando pointed out, "but I can say that I love you, Y/N. I love you even more than when I asked you to be my girlfriend, which I never thought was possible, but everyday I love you a little bit more. I know I won't be able to love anyone the way I love you and, honestly, I'm not sure who I am without you, because I've turned into a person I don't recognise anymore and I'm afraid that if I don't have you around, this is the real me, and I don't like it. You make me a better person - since day one! I'll love you forever, but I also understand that you don't need this pressure in your life and that you want us to be over. I deserve that", Lando mumbled.

As much as the idea of not being with you hurt him, he knew it didn't equate to the pain he caused you hence why he deserved it if you dumped him.

"You're making it so hard", your groaned rubbing your temples, "It would have been so much easier if you had told me that you didn't care about this, that you didn't care about me anymore".

"That's never going to happen, Y/N", Lando assured you.

"It would be so much easier if I told you to fuck yourself off, wouldn't it?", you chuckled and Lando got to see a small glimpse of the world's best smile, "but I can't do it - I do think, though, that we need to take some time, for both of us to work on our own things", you suggested.

"I get it, you can have all the time and space you need, Y/N", Lando nodded, "would it be too much to ask if I asked you for another shot?", he wondered as you quirked an eyebrow, "I know you just asked me for some time, and I'll give it to you, but I'm not going to let you entertain the thought that I don't care about you or that I don't love you any longer. I'm still the same person you met all those years ago and I want to remind you why you fell in love with me in the first place - if that's even the case", he blurted, "please".

"Slow steps, okay?", you mused with a small small.

"Is it still the case?", Lando picked up where he left off, "are you still in love with me?".

"If I wasn't in love with you and if I didn't love you, trust me, I wouldn't be here", you smiled, squeezing his hand in yours on top of the warm stone.

Over the last couple of days, you felt lighter. University was finally over for the semester and you could rest, and the whole situation with Lando was better. Even though it hurt to tell him all of those things and see his reaction, and even if Lando still had a lot to make up for, you had to admit you didn't expect to feel like this right away. The right path was being trailed and you couldn't feel more at peace with it.

So far, he kept his respectful distance, which didn't mean that you didn't know he was there. Two days after you met him in the marina, Lando sent you a bunch of flowers to your doorstep, your mother being the one to bring them up to your bedroom since she was arriving from work as the delivery man was about to knock on the door, smirking when she saw who it was from.

You were getting ready to go out for a picnic with Lando. The sunny day invited you to go out and Lando seemed to think the same, sending you a quick text with the location and plan ideas.

"Where are you off to?", your mother asked as she noticed you looking for your hat, "you look very nice, dear".

"Lando invited me for a picnic", you offered her a smile despite the butterfly feeling on your tummy.

"I'm glad you're working things out, Y/N - I know how much you care about him. And even if he hurt you, he's doing the work to get you back - a lot of men would just give up, but not Lando", your mother nudged. She always liked him despite her initial concerns when he moved up the racing ladder and the toll it would take on you. For a brief moment, she was upset that she had been right, but she never lost the hope that the young man dating her daughter would fight for them and for her. For you.

"I'm not sure how long I'll be out, but if I'm not home for dinner, don't worry too much", you added, waving at her before closing the door.

You drove yourself to the park, politely declining Lando's offer to pick you up. As you followed the directions, you spotted Lando under one of the trees, seemingly battling with the corner of the picnic blanket.

"Hey, need help with that?", you called as you approached him, noticing his flustered face at getting caught.

"Hey! It's fine, it's fine", he dusted off his shorts, "I didn't fold the corner properly, never mind iron this", he grumbled.

"We're going to sit on it, I don't think we needed it ironed", you smiled, setting your small backpack on the blanket and occupying the space that wasn't covered with glass containers and pape bags, noticing the logo of your favourite bakery and the sweets shop near Lando's apartment.

"So, I baked these - who knew my oven works, hm?", he joked as he pulled out some granola bars that smelled delicious, "Jon did give me the recipe, but I made them! He says they don't have any harmful raw ingredients in them so there's no danger if they're not cooked properly".

"You could've told me to bring something too", you sighed, "you had all this trouble and I'm just going to sit here and eat it", you reasoned.

"I think we've gathered that I deserve all this trouble, even though I didn't mind doing it - I think I finally get it when people say they find baking relaxing, even if I just threw some oats and syrup on a bowl with nuts and chocolate", Lando shrugged.

You smiled at his antics, "this looks lovely, Lan - thank you", before you grabbed a paper napkin to grab the food.

Lando's heart did a little backflip at the pet name - when he thought about it, he can't remember the last time you called him anything other than his name.

He wiped the thought away as he noticed you get one of the paper bags, "It was no trouble, but I did have to make sure the lady at the pastry shop knew I was the next in line because there was this lady, you should've seen her, she was, like, eighty? I don't know, maybe more than that, and she was very posh and very proper and she was trying to cut in line! Then she started saying something in French and I was like 'no can do, madam! I need to get these croissants for my girlfri- for Y/N because they're her favourites' - I bet she wanted to get them first but I did!", he dramatised the scene, earning your loud laugh. How much he missed that sound.

"Seems like it was a little troublesome, though", you teased. Inside your chest, your heart beat fast at his efforts.

"You're worth it", he smiled before taking a bite of the granola bar, "not to toot my own horn, but for someone who eats pre-prepared meals, this is amazing! Try these!", he offered, forming a shell with his hand before he brought it up to your mouth.

For anyone else, this would be just another set of cute behaviours, but for you, it carried a sense of intimacy you hadn't felt in a while. Taking a bite of it and chewing, you had to admit the balance of the nutty taste and the chocolate was on point, "it is good, Lan! You should make granola bars more often - might even make a side business out of it!", you smiled.

"Charles has some ice-cream, there's alcohol from the other guys too - me? Granola bars", he smiled, eating the rest of it and looking at you. He would never be stupid again. He would never take you for granted. Never ever.

The conversation flowed once you started eating, mainly pointing out the new swings in the park or the pretty blooms that were showing up, and even though you weren't acting like you would had it not happened, it was comfortable and Lando had definitely put some effort into this.

"Thank you for this, Lando", you smiled after you helped him clean up the supplies, making sure he wouldn't have any spills and trouble taking the rest home.

"It's alright, really", Lando mumbled as blood rushed to his cheeks, "it wasn't much, but I wanted to make sure you remembered I'm still in and that I love you more than anything", he smiled, closing the basket and getting up with it to walk back to the car, "which actually brings me to an invite I want to make you", he went back to mumbling again.

The invite was a risk, he knew it. After all, it was the reason that got your relationship here in the first place. Yet, he wanted you there and he thought it would be good. Adding to it, it would be the way that he could make sure he was able to see you as it would be a busy day.

"What is it?", you asked as you walked with him.

"The day after tomorrow, we're going karting - Max and P are coming over for a few days, they arrive tomorrow - and I was wondering if you wanted to join us", he invited, "I know it's not the best environment to be in given al-", he started rambling.

"I'd love to go, Lando", you assured, touching his arm confortingly, "I might need a ride though, if you don't mind doing the detour", you pointed out.

"It's fine, of course we'll pick you up!", he smiled, happy and excited at your answer.

"That's me", you nodded to your mother's car, unlocking it with the key, "thank you so much for this, Lan, I appreciate it a lot", you smiled, raising your stance so you could kiss his cheek, "will you text me the details when you know, please?".

"Yes! Absolutely!", he gave you a big smile again, "until then, Y/N!", he waved.

As Lando walked back to his car, there was an extra spring up on his step, a new found energy and a smile that insisted on not disappearing from his lips.

Little by little, he was slowly getting you back.

"Why are we going this way?", Max asked as Lando took the first exit on the roundabout, "isn't the track that way?".

Lando couldn't contain his smile, "we're going to pick Y/N up first".

Max and Pietra exchanged a look before rhe blonde woman spoke up, "you finally came to your senses?".

"P!", Max scolded.

"It's alright, Max - she's not wrong", Lando added, "but yes, I have, and I'm working on it, respecting her but making sure she knows how much I regret it, how sorry and how bad I feel that it happened and how I'm trying my hardest to make sure it does happen again", Lando turned around once he stopped at the red light, "Thank you for looking after her when I didn't, P. I know you have been a good friend to her, so thank you for that", he added.

"She didn't deserve what you did to her, but I'm happy you figured it out and that you're working on it - I don't say it too often, but if you two ever broke up, I would consider that true love isn't a thing, what you two have is something else entirely", she smiled.

"Excuse me?!", Max dramatised, "what did you just say?".

"Did I lie, Max? Who was it that came home in a nervous fit without any fingernails because they bit all of them off after Lando realised what happened? The same person who couldn't even sleep because of it? Who was it, hm?", she quesioned her boyfriend.

Lando chuckled at his friends, thinking that they really had been made for one another, "you two make me look like the sanest person inside this car", he shook his head, pressing the pedal and turning into your street.

There you were, the person he was sure was made for him too. Your outfit was simple, consisting of black jeans, black trainers, a shirt sleeve polo and a cardigan on your arm.

"Hi guys!", you greeted, getting inside the car and kissing Pietra's cheek before putting your seatbelt on.

"Why don't I get a kiss?", Max pouted.

"Because you stink, that's why", Lando chirped in, "all ready to go back there?", he mused, sending you a wink from the rear view mirror.

Blushing, you nodded before looking at Pietra again, accepting her hand in yours as she gave it a squeeze. For the whole drive to the track, you engaged light conversation, mainly listening to the plans they had for the clips they were filming before they raced eachother since you and P would happily drive around in the karts just to pass the time.

For the first segment, you stayed on the stands, watching the team get the equipment ready.

"How have you been, Y/N?", Pietra asked as she handed you a bottle of water she had gone to her and taking a sip of her own.

"I've been well - university is finally done with and I can actually have a thought that doesn't involve it", you giggled, "and Lando is home", you offered.

"Now, I wasn't going to be so blunt, but that is the subject I wanted to get at", she raised her eyebrows playfully.

"He's... Goodness, he's Lando again, my Lando", you sighed happily, "surely, it still stings a little and we need to work through our issues, but we're trailing our way through them. Learning our ways together - it's a bit like falling in love again and it's such a good feeling", you blushed at your admission, "it's doing us well and we're going with it, and not out of it", you smiled.

"Y/N", Pietra cooed, "you have no idea how make that makes me! It's so good to see you so happy and hopeful", she squeezed your arm, "I was ready to avenge you on him, by the way, Max did us both a favour in telling him, because I was sure what I wanted to do to Lando was considered a crime and I'm a good person", she raised her hands defensively.

Once the boys were done, Max waved at you to come down and meet them, giving them the time to get your equipment ready.

"Come here, I need to make sure you don't fly out of your kart this time", Max called his girlfriend after she was fully equipped to go on the single seater.

You finished the makeshift hairstyle before you looked for the helmet, finding it in Lando's hands, "come here, big head, I'll help you put it on", he smiled.

As you approached him, you could see his sudden nervousness at having you so close to him, hands setting the helmet on top of your head and then pulling in on, "Look who's talking", you mumbled quickly before it was all the way in, his fingers gingerly touching your neck as he did the strap buckle.

"All good for our speed daredevils?", Max joked, getting an instant slap from Pietra before he got up.

"Does it feel safe, Y/N?", Lando checked with you, making you wiggle a little to make sure you were strapped tightly enough, making you flash his two thumbs up.

"Ready, set, go!", Max yelled before you and Pietra went off, happily driving on the track despite not extracting the full potential out of the kart.

"You and Y/N seem well", Max offered as him and Lando took a break before they joined you back at the track.

"I don't think I'll ever stop feeling this guilt on my chest, it's like a weird weight that sits here and gets heavy every now and again", Lando explained, "but I think we're going in the right direction, and I'm going to spend every day of our lives making sure it never happens again. Y/N will never doubt my love or affection for her. I just want to make her happy now that she knows I know how much I screwed us up".

"I'm proud of you, man", Max tapped his back.

"You're what?", Lando asked, a little flustered at his bestfriends words.

"I'm proud of you, Lando - you're dealing with this in such a good way! I'm not saying I doubted you would, but seeing you actually do it and make it happen in such a grown up, loving and accountability filled way makes me proud of who you became. As much as I joke about it, what P said in the car was true - you and Y/N are it. Whenever I think about what endgame is, you two are the first thing that comes to mind", he admitted.

"Thanks, mate", Lando replied earnestly.

After a couple of laps from you, you saw the boys joining you in the track, making you assure that whenever they lapped you, you made a Mario Kart like noise, always managing to get a smile and a headshake from Lando and Max.

Once you were done, Max and Pietra volunteered to take all of the supplies back to the storage room.

"Did you enjoy your day, Y/N?", Lando asked as he approached you.

Surprising him, you nodded before you hugged him, "I haven't been this happy in a long time", you cuddled him, letting your head rest on his chest and letting yourself feel enveloped by his arms after the initial shock wore off.

"I'm glad", Lando uttered out before he composed himself, "I just want you to know that I could fulfill all your dreams and that there I'll never do anything to hurt you again. I'm well aware of all shit I've done and put you through, and how accountable I am for it. I just want to make you happy", he chuckled, "I don't want anything else in this world other than to make you happy, to show you how much I love you and that I want make this work, I want to make us work", he let out in such a serious and intense tone that you could feel a knot forming your throat, "you were my first love and I want you to be my last, Y/N".

"Lan...", you gasped softly, "I know it hasn't been good for you, but I just need a little bit more time to put it behind me, once for all", you added.

"I know, and that's alright", he mumbled against the top of your head, "I just wanted you to know that it is coming straight from my heart - everything I do, I do it for you", plucking up the courage to press a kiss there.

You closed your eyes and basked in the feeling, "two Bryan Adams references in the same sentence from the guy who used to DJ? You impress me, Lando Norris", you giggled and teased him playfully, feeling the rubble from his own laugh on his chest.

"I'll make sure to impress you everyday that we're alive, Y/N Y/L/N", he promised.

And he intended to keep it.

Lando invited you to his apartment for a cosy night in, thinking the plans over and over while he waited for you to arrive.

The delivery service was faster than he expected so he wrapped the takeout boxes in all of the kitchen towells he had so they would help retain the heat while you weren't there yet.

The whole apartment was tidy, he had your favourite blanket on the sofa and the TV had your favourite shows ready to stream in the background as you hopefully shared a comforting meal.

Your acceptance to come to his place made Lando feel very pleased with the way you were trailing in your relationship. He had been able to correct his mistakes and make you happy again. Even though there had been moments where he seemed to forget, he now knew that you had always been and will always be a priority in his life. He had never been in love with anyone else, and he was sure he would always be in love with you until his last breath.

A knock on his door pulled him out of his thoughts, heading up to the door to open it, "Hello hello! Come in", he gestured as you stepped inside, pecking his lips on the way - a few days prior, you had kissed him out of nowhere when you went to the bookshop and you swore he looked like a cartoon, all wide eyes and blushy cheeks.

Lando assured you you wouldn't leave the house and it would be just the two of you, so you hadn't bothered to put together a proper outfit, opting to wear a pair of leggings and an old Quadrant hoodie.

"I wasn't sure if I should bring anything, so I stopped by the sweets shop to get some of these hard candies, apparently they're very trendy now", you giggled sweetly as you set the bag on his hands so you could take your trainers off.

"You didn't have to, but thanks! We'll do a taste test after dinner - which is here by the way", he guided you to the living room.

Unravelling the mountain of kitchen towells, he had you sit down before he opened the containers, handing you a plate after you chose a bit of each of the dishes he ordered, "thank you, Lan", you smiled, sitting criss-cross on the sofa and waiting for him to do the same before you started eating.

"These are really good, have you tried them? They're new on their menu and when the guy explained it to me, I thought you'd like it", he pointed to one of the bite sized pieces.

"They are! They're not too heavy on the seasoning and they're really nice when you dip them in this sauce - try it!", you offered him the small cup.

"Is this going to be like the time you made me dip my spring rolls in that other sauce you claimed was the best thing in the world?", he asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Just try it, Lan!", you insisted, getting one from your plate, dipping it in the sauce and taking it up to Lando's mouth, your hand under the chopsticks in case some of it fell on his clothes.

Lando chewed it before nodding and humming in satisfaction, "is it good", he admitted with a smile after he wiped his lips.

Once you finished eating, you helped Lando bring everything back to the kitchen, saving the leftovers on his fridge, washing the plates and putting them away.

"You didn't have to help, I could've done it myself", Lando nudged before he laced your hand in his and pulled you back to the living room, "do you want to watch something?", he asked.

"There's this new Disney movie I haven't watched if you're up for it - or any of the shows we usually watch, I'm not picky", you answered quickly.

"Disney it is", he smiled sitting down and resting his arm on the back of the sofa, hoping you'd sit next to him and cuddle him.

You shuffled around before grabbing the fluffy blanket, pulling it over your legs and tentatively closing the distance between you, taking the plunge and taking a spot on his chest.

Once the movie was playing, Lando's arm dropped to wrap around you, lulling you closer to him and rubbing your arm.

"I can hear you thinking, and I'm sure you're not thinking about that little goat", you nodded to the screen.

"I'm watching the movie, I swear - and he's quite funny actually! He's also Mila's favourite character, at least he was last week", Lando chuckled, "but I was also thinking about us", he admitted.

"You were?", you turned to look up at him, wanting to know more.

"You do know I will apologize for what I did until the end of our lives, don't you?", Lando reflected out loud.

"Lando, stop it, it's forgiven and forgotten", you offered.

"Is it really?", he asked, a small smile breaking his way into his lips.

"It is, it's behind us now", you kissed his clothed chest.

"I will never forget it, though. It doesn't matter how many times you tell me to forget it or that you've forgiven me", he let out a shaky sigh, "I don't think I will, I hate myself for what did to you, the hurt that I caused you".

"Lando, let's not talk about it right now - not now, not ever. It's a part of our story, yes, and we learned from it, but I don't want to to remember every day. We are good now, and I don't want you to torture yourself with something that is out of your reach and that you can't change", you told him sternly, now sitting back against the sofa so you can face your boyfriend, "Promise me we won't mention this again, Lando".

"You're right", Lando agrees, "Okay, you're right, I promise, Y/N", he stated with a smile.

Your delicate lips peck his quickly before you go in for a second kiss, longer and more intense this time, and you both got lost in eachother.

You couldn't change what happened, but you could learn from it and work everyday to make sure it never happened again.

Lando was crazy about you, about who he was when was with you and how you made him feel, and you felt the same way about him.

"I love you, Lando", you smiled after you pulled away, resting your forehead in his.

"I love you forever, Y/N", he whispered, sealing his promise with a peck and bracing himself, "I'm never taking you for granted, and maybe this is a big gesture and I'm not sure how much this fits our new way - new patch? It's not a patch if we want it to last forever, right? - anyway, I would like to ask you to move in with me", Lando stated, "it doesn't have to be tomorrow or right away, we'll do it when you're ready! I just- I spend so much time of the year away as it is, and I don't want to cut the short time even shorter when it comes to you, so this way we'll be together for a bit longer - even if it's just at nightime and we can intertwine our legs or I can warm up the bed for you", he rambled on and you were sure he wouldn't stop anytime soon.

"Hey, hey! Lando, baby", you cupped his face with your hands, "look at me", you smiled as you straddled his lap, your thighs on each side of his and keeping you from fully sitting on him, "good now?".

"Well, since you're already there - sit, please", Lando added before he allowed himself to stress about your answer.

"I don't want to squash you", you mumbled.

Laying his hands in your thighs, he pulled you down, "I said sit down", he spoke sternly despite the playful glint on his eyes, "it's my home after all, I get to make the rules".

"Oh, I thought it was our home, but maybe I misread th-", your playfulness was cut short as your boyfriend flipped you around, your back hitting the soft sofa cushion with a yelp.

"You're moving in? For real?", he asked.

"Yes, baby, I'm moving in", you cupped his cheek, pulling him for a kiss, "I love you".

"My love, I'm going to spend everyday reminding you how beautiful, how strong", he started kissing your face with every word, "how kind, how amazing, how sexy, how hot, how smart, how kind, how incredible you are", he stopped just above your lips, "how all mine you are - I love you Y/N, forever", before he kissed your lips.

#lando norris imagine #lando norris fanfic #lando norris x reader #lando norris fic #lando norris x you #lando norris fluff #lando norris angst #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #f1 fic #f1 fanfic #f1 fluff #f1 angst #ln4 x reader

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ruruvxz · 14 days

Note

Or any Hanni fic would be great. Like domestic hanni would be extremely cute too.

“Anniversary”

Girlfriend!Hanni Pham x Fem!Reader

↳synopsis: Taking a well needed rest was everyone’s dream after a long week of slaving away on your desk, filling out spreadsheets and whatnot. And you were no expectation to that rule! But even if you yearned for that break, you couldn’t get it because of a house party you were invited to; that just so happened to be the same day as your anniversary you forgot about. Your poor girlfriend couldn’t take it any longer!

↳cw: swearing, neglectful reader, mentions of alcohol, jealous Hanni, fluff

↳wc: 2.6k

a/n: genuinely this has been marinating in my drafts for so long, I keep forgetting what I want to write. sorry it took quite a while to get back to this request but we’re all good! anyways hope you enjoyed!!

You felt awfully sluggish today, maybe it was the copious amount of tasks your awful boss assigned to you, or perhaps it was the looming fact that you agreed to party at some old high school friend's apartment. Not to mention the fact that you'd only have a few hours of rest at your apartment before having to get up again, you really could've just declined the offer but your friend needed you to be there, and you didn't want to be a flaker!

As you dragged yourself to your shared apartment with your girlfriend, you inserted the key into the door and snapped it open, letting out a loud grunt as you pushed yourself through it. Immediately coming inside you scent the pungent aroma wafting in the air, the trace getting more noticeable as you walk past the kitchen. Popping your head inside you see your girlfriend, Hanni, trying to cook up something. It was surprising since she usually wasn't the one to cook, nor come home before you.

From the look of her messily thrown-together bun, staying intact by a flimsy claw clip, she returned not too long away. Hanni looked a bit too fixated on what she was cooking that she didn't even notice you coming in, letting out an exasperated sigh you walked over to her. Rubbing her back while leaning over her shoulder, Hanni was a bit surprised her body jolted at your touch.

"Oh, your home!" She squealed, turning her gaze towards yours, her glasses almost falling from the bridge of her nose. "I'm making us dinner!" She smiled, looking back at the pan that was slowly grilling a few vegetables. You took the time to inspect all the work she put into constructing the perfect meal, and honestly, you were looking forward to her cooking.

"Thank you so much, Hanni, I needed this." You expressed your gratitude before she lifted a piece of broccoli to your lips, giving a little chuckle as you ate the broccoli without hesitation.

Sadly, as you munched on the green vegetable, you felt your phone vibrating in your back pocket, your ringtone filling both your and Hanni's ears. It wasn't all that uncommon for anyone to call you after you clocked off, but from the contact number it most definitely wasn't an innocently confused junior coworker, it was your friend. "Shit" you mumbled as you checked the time.

"I'm so sorry baby, I just realized I have something to do... I can't eat dinner with you tonight." You sullenly spoke, putting the phone back in your pocket, Hanni just gave you a distraught look. "I just remember I'm meeting up with Belle, she's having a get-together." Mumbling as you continued. You felt so awful but you already promised Belle— Hye-Won that you'd meet up with her, but your poor girlfriend was slaving away to make you both a delicious meal.

"Oh uhm! It's okay Y/N don't worry about it—, we can always have dinner another time" Hanni reassured, clamping her palm on top of yours; it felt so heart-crushing seeing your girlfriend reacting this way, but you already made a promise to a friend. "M' sorry baby, I promise we'll have dinner together next time... it's just I don't wanna let Hye-Won down."

"Don't worry about it Y/N! There's always next time." Hanni laughed weakly as she pulled her hands away from yours, breaking any contact she had with you to flimsily play with her food. Being the pushover she was, she couldn't get herself to protest against you, even if today was special, not only to her but also to you, to both of you. Today had marked your 2nd anniversary, a day which would've and should've been celebrated together in each other's arms, but that completely flew over your head. Technically it wasn't your "lovers anniversary" as per se, it was more like the day the both of you first met. It was a tad bit silly, you both met in the university entry week and kindled your friendship turned relationship from there.

But the story of how you met wasn't even the focal point, what was more important was the fact that unbeknownst to you, you had been subconsciously ignoring her the whole day. Whether that be this morning when you mistakenly abandoned her when you hastily got ready for work, greeting her with an empty apartment when she woke up. Or when you unknowingly lost your phone the entire day just to be greeted with multiple missed calls and messages from your girlfriend.

It was all too much, and Hanni felt as if she was losing you, what was she even to do? She can't confront you about it for fear of scaring you away even further, but if she continues to ignore the issue who knows what will happen? All she could do was cook you one of your favorite meals in the hopes that you'd fall back into her arms. And by the stare you were in, it didn't look like it was quite working; maybe it was doing the opposite.

Overwhelmed by the thought of you leaving her, her face scrunched into an unpleasant one, overthinking every minuscule detail, plotting different ways she could get you back. Even if you were dense, you weren't an idiot and could see the discomfort written all over her sweet pout. "You know... you can come with me if you want baby." You offered reaching your hand out to pinch her cheek, shaking it around a bit to tease her.

Hanni's eyes instantly lit up at the idea, maybe this could get her the perfect opportunity to get through to you, and maybe you'd leave your little meeting with your friends to have a proper date to celebrate your anniversary. "Really? I can?" She asked pushing her hair out her face as she looked up at you, practically jumping at the opportunity to spend a little bit of time with you. "Of course bun, I'd probably be bored out of my mind anyways." You laughed taking your hand off her cheeks to ruffle a bit of her hair. "C'mon' let's get going bunny— promise you'll like it, baby."

"Okay!"

This was a mistake. Everything about this "get-together" was a mistake. Hanni was under the presumption that this was a small little hangout with a bunch of close friends, but it could be farther from the truth. In all reality she was stuffed like a pack of sardines with a bunch of people she had never met, you told her it was a high school reunion but she didn't know half of your graduate grade would come. All of which you apparently "knew" somewhat, whether it was from mutual connections or you genuinely liked hanging out with them.

Whatever it was, you ditched her to go hang out with a bunch of pals you hadn't seen in a while, leaving her to sit on a crowded couch and socialize with three other girls she'd never met. Hanni's bubbly personality was only able to get her so far before eventually getting more and more drained as the girls got to talking more. Maybe it was because they kept talking about mindless topics or maybe it was because her eyes kept lingering back to yours. Your carefree attitude when you gave your devoted attention to the girl who was talking to you infuriated her more and more.

The girl had soft curly locks that reached to her waist, she was undoubtedly taller than Hanni and was a lot more different from her. Just the way she presented herself struck a cord within Hanni, especially when she was all so bold whenever she touched the hems of your shirt. The curly-haired girl's personality was oddly touchy, getting more and more bold as she rubbed your back and your arms with a soft giggle. The fact she was getting away with this and the fact you were so dense about this made your girlfriend bubble up with rage even more.

In your defense, you got more and more uncomfortable by the touch but were far too intoxicated to convey your message. Resorting to backing away slowly whenever she got too close, it was the least you could do as you knew your girlfriend could be here any time. As the curly-haired girl continued your conversation it took Hanni far more constraint, not to have had to pry the curly-haired woman's hand away from you. Although she was left on the couch watching from afar not saying a single peep to not stir conflict with someone she did not know about.

This didn't negate the fact that Hanni was still aggravated, to the point that she hadn't noticed she tightened her grip on the plastic cup, that it started to leave soft dents. Oh how she wished she could just chuck her drink at the girl next to you and drag you away, but she was better than that.

It wasn't until the curly-haired girl got a bit too handsy when she was checking out your necklace that Hanni got you for your birthday that she finally got Hanni to reach her tipping point. She threw the pillow that was resting on her lap back on the couch and excused herself from the conversation she was having with the other girls. Strutting over towards the both of you and wrapping her arms around your waist tightly. Making sure to dig her head in the crook of your neck with a pouting face. "What are you guys talking about..." Hanni whined playfully as her gaze burned into the woman's in front of her.

"Huh? Hey baby, she was talking about how much she liked the necklace you got me." You replied honestly, a bit oblivious to the girls glaring at one another.

"You must be the lucky girl, Hanni was it? I'm Aaliyah." The taller girl replied, tucking a strand of her curly hair behind her ear with a soft laugh. She took one glance at Hanni, before pulling her attention back at you, completely ignoring her presence before talking once more. Almost as if Hanni was just some close friend, then an actual partner for you; the conversation lasted for a bit before your girlfriend cut her off once more.

Her grip slid away from your waist and swung around your neck as she talked, grasping onto you tightly when she spoke. “So how about you? Has anyone been lucky in your life?” Hanni asked bluntly, a bit of a rude question from your point of view, but what were you to say about that? “No, not anyone I can think of right now,” Aaliyah replied irritated by her question using her free hand to fix your puka shell necklace, before Hanni used her arm to swat her away. The tension grew thicker as your slightly drunken state was standing right in the middle of the two girls.

It came to a point where both girls were having a sarcastic and bitter conversation about relationships, as you stood there, Hanni’s arms around your neck while another girl was flirting with your face. You were beyond embarrassed and just wanted to run back to the car and hide, but the way the conversation was going it didn’t seem like it. “That’s a shame you can’t find a good match, maybe avoid going for other people who are taken? I don’t know just a hunch.” She bit back, taking a jab at how out of all the people in this party she was flirting with her Y/N.

“You’re so right, sorry I didn’t see a leash on them.” She laughed and looked back at you and back to Hanni, the way Hanni wrapped her arms tighter after that comment struck a nerve with her. “Oh dear, why would anyone need to do that, maybe if people respected others there would be no need for that.” She scoffed, before releasing her grip off of you and giving her full attention to the snarky woman in front of her.

“Oh don’t be THAT insecure—“

“Don’t be like that Aly.” You finally spoke up, defending your girlfriend while your head pounded at the situation and the fact the music was oddly getting louder. “C’mon bun, let’s go.”

“Awh Y/N, we were only playing around!” Aaliyah responded rubbing her nape before looking at Hanni’s scorned expression, it intimidated her nonetheless. “You play too much Aly…” You responded looking back at Hanni, stroking her head before resting a sweet kiss on her flushed cheeks, explaining to her how Aliyah was just a friend who likes to tease other people’s partners for some sick reason.

“She’s an… oddball, that’s for sure, she’s just messing with you.” You laugh lowly, continuing to run your fingers through your girlfriend’s hair as she wraps her arms around your waist. It didn’t take long before you soon forced Aaliyah to apologize to your girlfriend before you left, it was a bit awkward, but they were both able to set the record straight. Finally making it back to the car and hurling yourself in the passenger seat to let Hanni drive back home, being the most sober one between the both of you.

The drive back was silent, but she still resented you for the fact you forgot your anniversary, once you both made it back to the apartment she quickly changed and headed to bed. You found it odd that she went straight to the bedroom without a mindless conversation or a sweet treat, so you quickly ran to her aid. Maybe something was wrong! (There most definitely was, she was on the verge of tears as she laid her head down on the pillow, hoping that maybe by some miracle you’d realize how much today meant to her. And how quickly you forgot her anniversary for the whole day.)

“Hanni, is everything okay? Why do you look so down?” You asked kneeling in front of her as she rested her head on the pillow with her eyes squeezed shut. She didn’t reply, as she just turned her head away from yours, looking to the other side to get some rest. “Don’t be like that, what’s wrong hun?” You asked standing up and stroking her arm over the covers, to give her some comfort, from the discomfort you didn’t know you caused.

“Anniversary.”

“What?”

“Today was our anniversary.” She cried as she rolled back over toward you, tears welling up in her eyes. You felt awful as you continued to rub her shoulders, you really didn’t know it was your anniversary today, and when you looked at your phone to clear your suspicions everything clicked.

“Hanni…”

“What.” She barked as she hid herself over the covers once more, hiding her crying face. “Our anniversary is tomorrow, not today.” You laughed as you pulled the covers away from her body to show her your phone with the date plastered on top of the time. Hanni’s cheeks burned red as she sat back up, apologizing profusely for the way she acted, as you laughed at the whole situation. Once she finally stopped apologizing you grabbed her and pulled her into your chest as you ran your fingers through the back of her hair. Spending the rest of the night in each other's arms before the clock finally struck midnight.

“Would you look at that?” You looked up at the clock, displaying a perfect midnight. “Technically it’s our anniversary today.” Laughing you nudged Hanni before she pushed you off playfully as she stared at the clock.

“Happy anniversary Y/N.”

“Happy anniversary Hanni.”

#idol x female reader #idol x reader #female reader #gxg #newjeans imagines #newjeans x reader #girl group imagines #Hanni x reader #Hanni Pham x reader #hanni x you #Hanni x female reader #Hanni Pham #Hanni imagines

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megalony · 3 months

Text

A Family Gathering- Prequel

After a lot of amazing requests and messages about this little series, I've come up with a prequel, as requested. I hope you will all like this Eddie Diaz imagine.

I had so much fun writing this one and would love to do more like this if anyone is interested/ has any suggestions. Let me know what you think.

Taglist: @justagirlthatlovedtoread @musicistheway @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @luula @missdreamofendless @bradleybeachbabe @woderfulkawaii @amberpanda99 @daggersquadphantom @marvel-and-chicago-fan @angryknightstatesmantrash @minjix @lyjen @kmc1989 @itsmytimetoodream @noonenuts @hiireadstuff @ashie-babie @classyunknownlover @jayyeahthatsme @sp1ritssz @dumb-fawkin-bitch @oliverstarksbae @gimatida @heart-35 @supernaturalstilinski @stefansalvatoresgf @kyky9103 @wutheringhearts2275 @gay4hotmilfs @itshamleth @chaoticnosleepinfluencer @gs29 @wh0reforsmutstuff @mel-vaz @natashamea18 @chrisevansdaughter @alexandra8484 @deena-beena-weena @targaryenluvs @shelbygeek @kpoplover-19 @marvelmenarebeautiful @gillybear17

@zoeybennett @mrspeacem1nusone @zephyrmonkey @estella-novella @eleventhdoctorsangel @kniselle @senjoritanana

@shauna-carsley @dottierose @cfdhouse51 @darkfemme1 @rainechase45 @ml572 @jessie-lynn28 @lolalolsstuff @jupiter1700 @ashdoctor @an-aliens-ghost @lunaroserites @houseoftwistedspirits @itshamleth

Part 1

Part 2

Eddie Diaz Masterlist

Summary: (Y/n) and Eddie are just getting over a recent loss, and agree to a family meal when the Buckley parents come to town. But when her parents speak out of line, Eddie loses his temper.

Enjoy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"You know we can just go home, right?" Eddie's words tickled the shell of (Y/n)'s ear and they were so enticing.

It was so tempting to turn around and go home.

The idea of walking into her brother's flat and enduring this stupid dinner was curdling (Y/n)'s blood like spoilt milk. She wanted to go home already. She wanted to grab Eddie's hand and spin them around and guide him back to the car before either of them had to go through any interogation tonight.

But she couldn't. They were already here now, and she had made a pact. (Y/n) promised her twin and their big sister that they would all be here tonight because their parents had come into town. They all had to be here together and support each other through this, they couldn't leave the others to fend for themselves around their parents.

Eddie was now included in this pact, he couldn't go and leave his fiancee or his best friend to deal with their parents alone.

"Buck would just come and pick us up." Defeat laced through (Y/n)'s words but she found herself slowing down as they approached the front door.

Three feet away from the door, (Y/n) turned to the left and latched her hands around Eddie's shoulders. She took him by surprise, slowly nudging him back until his shoulders hit the wall and his eyes blew wide in their sockets. His hands paused at his sides, unsure where to put them when he didn't know what she was doing.

He held his breath, waiting until (Y/n) flopped forward against his chest and buried her face in his neck before he dared move. His hand cradled the back of her head and his other arm bound around her waist, feathering his fingers up and down her lower back. He felt her shallow breaths tickling the side of his neck and he could practically feel the unease radiating off of her.

"Okay?" He wasn't sure whether this was the start of a panic attack or if this was (Y/n)'s way of post-poning the inevitable meal with her family.

"Just need a minute."

He hummed against her hair, tilting his head down enough to be able to plant wet kisses against her temple while he braced himself a bit better against the wall.

She couldn't go inside until she willed herself to do this, until she put up a mental wall that her parents wouldn't be able to break through. She had to let their comments wash over her head, she had to pretend their words didn't cut her like knives and let them favour the eldest Buckley sibling and treat the twins like they were disposable.

Fighting with them never worked because their parents didn't think they were doing anything wrong. They thought they were giving constructive advice or little tips or making plain comments rather than putting their children down and cutting them deep enough to give them scars.

"Baby, is this gonna be one of those dinners Buck was telling me about?"

Up to now, Eddie hadn't been to a family meal with the Buckley parents. He and (Y/n) had been together for three years and over that time, Eddie had met her parents, briefly spoken to them when they came down for Maddie's birthday and when they stopped by around the twin's birthday. But he didn't have a sit down meal with them.

The most Eddie had spoken to them was at his and (Y/n)'s engagement party and that hadn't been a fun conversation. He knew her parents well enough to know they weren't the paternal type, they weren't caring or loving or supportive and they didn't approve of most things in Buck and (Y/n)'s lives.

He had a gut feeling this meal wasn't going to go well and Eddie had already been warned by the twins that he needed to let their parent's comments wash over his head.

But he didn't think he would be able to do that.

"Probably… let's get this over with. If I say I feel sick, that's our cue to leave." (Y/n) tilted her head back so she could look up at Eddie who broke out into a soft smile and nodded.

He would gladly take her home now if she said those words and meant them. If she said she didn't want to do this they could just go home, but he knew she wouldn't. He knew she was doing this for Maddie and Buck as much as for herself to try and make bridges with her parents.

She and Eddie were getting married in a few weeks and she wanted to be on good terms with her parents so the wedding went smoothly.

Eddie's hand moved round from her neck to cup her chin, bringing her close so he could claim her lips and steal her breath away. He kept the kiss light and trailed his lips over the corner of her mouth, making a trail down her neck until (Y/n) groaned and gave his shoulder a nudge.

She felt better when they headed towards the door and Eddie curved his arms around her waist. His lips attached to the back of her head, his lips pressed against hers and his chest moulded down around her like a protective layer trying to shield her from what awaited them inside.

His hands feathered up and down her waist until (Y/n) reached down to cup his wrists, squeezing tightly to try and get rid of her panic and adrenaline.

"Here we go." Eddie murmured into her hair when he knocked on the door.

(Y/n) dragged her eyes up and down her frame, suddenly self-conscious at the prospect of her mother seeing what she was wearing.

Whenever she had dinner with her parents, (Y/n) tried to make an effort because it wasn't worth her mother telling her she could try harder or wear more appealing clothes that suited her. There was always some little jibe her mother made.

But (Y/n) hadn't been bothered about her clothes today. She wanted to feel comfortable and that meant wearing Eddie's clothes. She chose one of his thin cotton jumpers, it was a plain leaf green colour and smelled of Eddie and his cologne which was a natural calmer for (Y/n). It hung off her frame and made her feel concealed and protected and she loved to pull the cuffs down over her hands whenever she got nervous.

The jumper looked good on her, she didn't look like she was lounging about the house or scruffy or unwell since it was two sizes too big for her. It almost looked fashionable, but (Y/n) knew what her mother was like.

"Hey, there you are. Come in." Buck's raised brow and locked jaw told them he wasn't coping very well and it made (Y/n) wonder how long their parents had been here.

They were staying in a hotel, they never stayed over with any of them. Buck only had one bedroom which counted him out, Maddie and Chimney's spare room was a study with no bed or sofa bed, so that put them out. And (Y/n) and Eddie's spare room was a nursery, something they wouldn't be using for a while. And their parents wouldn't stay with them on their sofa bed because they knew (Y/n) was still not herself and it would be too imposing to stay.

For that reason, it wasn't (Y/n) or Eddie hosting dinner tonight. Neither of them were in the right frame of mind to host her parents and they all knew if it went wrong, they would end up having to kick her parents out which wouldn't do them any good.

Buck had offered to host because his twin couldn't and Maddie hosted their parents last time they were in town, so it was his turn. And he could busy himself with cooking and leave Maddie to entertain them.

"Want something to drink?"

They followed Buck into the apartment and straight into the kitchen. (Y/n) pressed her hands down on the counter and leaned across to see what her brother was cooking.

Carbonara. She would take a guess that Bobby had either showed him how to make this or sent him the recipe to follow. Either way, it smelt good and (Y/n) was starving.

"Something non-alcoholic, I'm driving and I'm on shift tomorrow." Eddie looped his arm around the front of (Y/n)'s chest and neck and smothered his lips against the back of her head. He wanted a drink, God, he wanted a few of them to get him through tonight. He had been halfway drunk at the engagement party and that hadn't been enough to get him through the conversations with his soon to be in-laws.

But if he wanted to drive home tonight, he couldn't drink and Eddie knew they would be needing a quick getaway at some point tonight.

"Sure." Buck found a non-alcoholic beer in the fridge and handed it over before he looked at his twin with a raised brow. His lips quirked into a wide grin when she noticed the bottle of red wine Maddie had brought over. Chimney had dropped Maddie off earlier on his way to work so she didn't have to drive and could have a drink or five.

Chimney was lucky, he was on shift and couldn't get out of it. He didn't have to suffer through this meal tonight and he kept saying that since he and Maddie were only dating and weren't engaged that he didn't count as family.

Reaching out, (Y/n) grabbed the bottle and handed it over to her brother, she could have a drink and she was going to drink as much as she needed to get herself through tonight.

Once a large wine glass was in her hand, (Y/n) took a few sips to brave herself up before she turned round and tried to mentally prepare herself to head over to the dining table. Hiding away in the kitchen felt like a good idea, but her parents would only come in here to see them if they didn't go in there soon.

Her free hand reached behind her to lace her fingers with Eddie, keeping him pressed up against her side as if she thought she might lose him or he might try and hang back out the way. She needed back up.

"Oh, there you two are."

(Y/n) set her drink down on the table and took a deep breath when her parents walked over. She forced a smile onto her face and let her mum reel her in for a hug and felt her dad's arm loop around her shoulders so he could kiss her temple.

"How are you both?" Margaret gave (Y/n)'s shoulders a squeeze and smiled at her before she leaned back to look (Y/n) up and down, clearly taking note of what she was wearing.

"We're good." She nodded, reaching behind her for Eddie's hand again while her dad leaned round to pat Eddie's shoulder and mutter a quiet but encouraging 'how are you' to him.

She wasn't technically lying, her and Eddie were doing much better than they had been two months ago. They seemed to be getting back on track and finding a new sense of normality together with Chris, but (Y/n) knew being around her parents was going to shift that balance.

Her mother would pry and be insensitive and her father would either dismiss everything, not take an interest or just plough through and expect everything to be fine.

Being here tonight wasn't something (Y/n) was extremely happy about, but she was here. Their parents had made the trip down to see all three of them and the least (Y/n) could do was be here in support of her siblings, if for no other reason.

"You look… nice."

(Y/n) could feel her smile dampening already and she noted the way Eddie slipped his hand from hers so his arm could deadlock around her waist instead. He pulled her back against his chest and kissed the back of her head while (Y/n) looked down at her jumper- or rather, Eddie's jumper. It didn't look bad on her, sure it looked a little baggy, but that was what (Y/n) wanted. She didn't want anything tight or uncomfortable, she wanted to hide away in Eddie's clothes and he had no objections.

She forced a smile onto her face while she reached across the table and picked up her glass, downing half the wine that left a tang in the back of her throat.

She was somewhat glad when her mum's attention turned on Maddie who sat down at the end of the table near the balcony doors. (Y/n) could feel her teeth clanking against the rim of her glass that she was hovering between her lips, but her lips curled and something sparked in her stomach when she looked at her mum and sister.

Why was her mum so sincere when she told Maddie she looked lovely, but all she could fathom to say about (Y/n) was she looked nice? Why was it so hard to compliment both daughters rather than favour one for the other?

What had (Y/n) done to make her parents so disappointed in her? Why could she never be in their favour, even for a day?

Her free hand moved down to clamp around Eddie's wrist and she tilted her head back, downing the last of her drink. That bottle Maddie brought was going to be finished before the night was out. If (Y/n) and Buck were going to endure being left out, then the pair of them would be getting drunk.

She slowly uncurled from Eddie's hold, suddenly feeling like she was stepping out of her armour, leaving herself bare and unprotected against an attack.

And three steps towards the kitchen where Buck was adding the finishing touches, (Y/n) could sense that attack looming over her.

"Slow down honey, there's no rush."

A chill tore down (Y/n)'s spine and her steps faltered, but she didn't turn around. She knew all the different tones her mother would use and that was a condescending tone with a hint of false worry. She would be more embarrassed than worried if (Y/n) got drunk too quickly.

When their parents had friends over for a party once, the twins had taken two bottles of wine from the kitchen and got themselves into a right state. They had only been sixteen at the time and they truly showed their parents up, especially when both of them turned up hungover at school the next day and had to get seen by the nurse.

"Why, I'm not driving." She didn't look over her shoulder as she spoke, her eyes remained firmly on her brother she was aiming for.

'I'm not pregnant anymore.'

Those were the words (Y/n) could feel on the tip of her tongue, but something held her back. Self-depravating jokes wouldn't do her any favours and it would only start the waterworks. (Y/n) didn't want her parents referring or talking about the miscarriage because she knew they wouldn't be fair or considerate.

She headed into the kitchen and poured herself another glass before she moved over to Buck's side and helped him start to plate up.

"You good?" Buck nudged their elbows together and snook a quick glance down at his twin. He noticed the way her hands were shaking as she scattered the plates around the counter. And he could feel how close she was standing beside him, like she wanted shelter and protection.

"I hope you have more wine in the fridge."

Buck nodded and a small smile played on his lips as the pair of them turned and headed out to put the plates on the table. He had stocked up on wine for both his sisters, a load of beer for him and their dad, and non-alcoholic for Eddie. Because Buck knew Eddie would be driving. There was no way they would get a taxi here because if things went south tonight, the couple wanted and would need a quick getaway.

A timid smile graced (Y/n)'s lips when she walked over to the table with the last plates. Eddie knew her well.

Since both parents were sat together on one side of the table, Eddie had taken the opportunity to sit opposite Margaret. That meant (Y/n) could sit on Eddie's right and be opposite her dad. Being close to her mum wasn't something (Y/n) wanted to do tonight and this way, she would have Buck on her right at the end of the table and Maddie was already seated at the other end of the table next to Eddie and Margaret.

Her head fell on Eddie's shoulder and her hand moved beneath the table to grip his thigh. All the energy (Y/n) had tried to stock up for tonight had depleted. She was empty and they hadn't even been here an hour yet.

But the feeling of Eddie's arm looping around the back of her shoulders and his lips against the top of her head made (Y/n) relax. And her twin was on her other side, steering and striking up the conversation. Buck was a master at conversation topics, he had a whole load of random facts that were enough to strike up conversations and steer them in the right direction. He knew what subjects to avoid when talking to their parents.

Most of the conversation went in one ear and out the other with Eddie. He wasn't all that keen on engaging (Y/n)'s parents in conversation when they had hardly said one nice thing to her so far.

He wasn't stupid. He knew why they were here; one of the Buckley siblings had called them. He would guess that Maddie or Buck had said something because their parents hadn't called (Y/n) once to check in with her after the miscarriage.

Eddie didn't want to be here talking to people who didn't have the decency to look out for their own daughter.

Eddie's parents had been in touch every day after the miscarriage. They came down to stay with them for a week, they brought (Y/n) back out of her shell and made sure the couple were okay before they went back to Texas. Eddie didn't see (Y/n)'s parents making that kind of effort, he didn't see them sending her a text or giving one call to see how she was.

If they couldn't be bothered to put in the effort with her, then Eddie wasn't going to put that effort in with them.

He kept his arm looped around the back of (Y/n)'s shoulders, feathering his fingers up and down her arm and across her shoulder while he ate.

It was a relief to see (Y/n) actually hungry for once. Eddie was no chef in the kitchen and he wouldn't have known what to do if Buck, Maddie and Bobby hadn't come round bringing homemade goods with them. They had al perked (Y/n) back up and got her eating and made sure she didn't become sick after what happened.

And since cooking was something Buck took a lot of pride in, (Y/n) always felt that pride radiating off of him. She would never turn down her twin's food unless she felt sick to her stomach.

When he was done, Eddie leaned back and slouched in his chair and let his head flop to the right until his cheek was resting on top of (Y/n)'s head.

Every now and then he glanced across at his soon to be in-laws, but he only saw them genuinely smile when they were looking or talking to Maddie. It infuriated him, but Eddie couldn't say anything. What was he supposed to say? He settled for smiling down at (Y/n) or nodding when Buck went on one of his tangents about one of his favoured topics.

A grin spread across Eddie's lips when he looked across at Buck who changed, yet again, to a new topic.

"Don't worry about the bachelor party, I've got it all covered."

Eddie tilted his head back, closing his eyes as he couldn't fight off the smile that broke out on his lips. He wasn't opposed to a bachelor party, mainly because when he got married to Shannon, Eddie didn't have one. Their wedding had been rushed and sorted out by Eddie's mum and his friends back in Texas weren't as keen on partying as the guys over here.

It would be a fun night, Eddie always enjoyed a night out with the team and if Buck was organising then it was going to be scheduled fun. They usually left Buck in charge of organising the station parties and the Christmas meal they always went out on. He was regimented and liked to stick to black and white plans, but it was still always a good night when Buck was in charge.

"Do not plan that the night before the wedding, I mean it." (Y/n) nudged her brother's foot under the table.

She knew what he and Eddie were like when they got drunk and if Hen and Chimney were going to be at the party too, then all Hell would break loose. They would all be hungover in the morning and the wedding was at lunchtime, not late in the afternoon. There wouldn't be enough time for them all to sober up in time for the ceremony.

"I won't, don't worry. I'll plan the hen night too-"

"Um, excuse me, that's what I'm planning." Maddie rose a brow from the other end of the table, her lips curling into a frown before she took a large swig of her drink.

She was the big sister, she was the one who would be planning a party for (Y/n) while Buck planned one for Eddie. That was the way this was supposed to go.

"Well don't plan it the same night as the bachelor's party."

"Why?" Eddie's nose crinkled and he let out a chuckle. Wouldn't it be better to have both parties on the same night? Get them both over and done with at the same time? Then (Y/n) wouldn't be stuck home while Eddie was out getting drink, and likewise, Eddie wouldn't be moping around at home while (Y/n) was out.

"How can I be in two places at once?" The smart retort came with Buck holding his hands out at his sides and shaking his head in a mocking manner. But he looked towards their parents when their dad huffed and gave him a certain look.

"I think hen nights are typically for the girls, Evan." He patted Buck's shoulder like he was a teenager being told how the real world works.

"But I'm the twin, I need to be there, right?" He batted his hand against (Y/n)'s shoulder and beamed triumphantly when she nodded, murmuring a soft 'of course'.

(Y/n) wanted her twin there. She knew it wasn't strictly traditional, but this was her wedding and it was about what she and Eddie wanted. (Y/n) couldn't have a proper night out and enjoy herself if her brother wasn't there. She wanted both siblings to be there on her night out and only a few close friends, not a large group of people she rarely knew or distant friends getting drunk and ruining the night.

She wanted her twin there so she could celebrate and dance and drink and enjoy herself. She would let Maddie organise the night because that was what her big sister wanted to do, and Buck was already organising the party for Eddie. But Buck would be there with her, no doubt about it.

"Just think, one more month and you won't be a Buckley anymore."

A soft pout formed on Maddie's lips as she looked across at her little sister who grinned around her wine glass.

That was true. (Y/n) has already been thinking about how her name would look and how she was going to have to change her signature and officially change her name at work. She was no longer going to be one of the Buckley siblings by name, or 'the Buckley twins'. She was going to be a Diaz soon.

She felt Eddie murmur "You'll be Mrs Diaz," against the side of her head and it made a spark of adrenaline flood through her stomach. The low, gritty tone of Eddie's voice made shivers crawl up and down (Y/n)'s spine and she grinned, turning her head to the side to peck his cheek.

"Well, there's no rush, is there?" Margaret's words caught them all by surprise and each of them turned to face her, unsure what she was implying by that. "I mean, now there's no baby to speed things up."

"Are you fucking kidding me?"

Dread took the place of adrenaline and love in (Y/n)'s stomach and she cowered down into Eddie's side when she felt him begin to tremor.

His arm retracted from around her shoulders and made (Y/n) suddenly feel cold and uneasy and she chased after his touch. Her shoulder bumped into his side and she inched closer until she was almost sat on Eddie's chair. But Eddie sat forward. His elbows dug down into the table almost harsh enough to leave indents in the wood and his hands curled into fists.

(Y/n) dared to reach her hands out and she curled them around Eddie's bicep that seemed to expand and bulge like he was gearing up for a fight. Maybe he was.

Were they really going to be this petty, inconsiderate and vile? Were they going to upset (Y/n) like this when they should be supporting and trying to look out for her? What kind of parent said something like that? If Margaret met Eddie's mother, she would be in for a shock because Eddie's mother would never allow her to say something like that to (Y/n), not after all (Y/n) had been through.

"Oh my God, mum. Eddie proposed before (Y/n) got pregnant and you know it. They're getting married in four weeks whether you approve or not so quit probing for once, please?"

Buck clasped his hands together beneath his chin that was becoming taut and tense. His upper lip curled like he was going to snarl and his eyes, although full of anger and resentment, pleaded with his parents. He was pleading for them to stop. They couldn't do this now, not tonight. They couldn't upset (Y/n) when she didn't need or deserve it. She had been through enough without them making it worse.

Eddie had proposed before (Y/n) found out she was pregnant and even if she hadn't ever got pregnant, they would still be getting married next month. It had all been planned out and the plans had changed twice already.

First, they had prepared for (Y/n) to be seven months pregnant when they got married. Then after losing the baby, Eddie tried to postpone the wedding but (Y/n) wouldn't have that. She wasn't having anything else in her life go wrong, she was marrying Eddie if it was the last thing she did. So, plans changed again and (Y/n)'s dress had been altered twice.

"Is that why you're here, to try and talk us into putting off the wedding?" Pain and exhaustion flooded (Y/n)'s voice as she leaned her cheek onto Eddie's hunched shoulder.

She had been sceptical when her parents said they were coming down and wanted to see all three of them. She wondered what the occasion was, because they always had a reason or occasion for coming down. They never visited on a whim. Had they come down with the intention of asking (Y/n) and Eddie to postpone or cancel the wedding?

"Maddie told us you were coping a little better now and thought we should all support you."

"You asked them to come down?" (Y/n) couldn't help the hurt that crept into her voice and she tried to keep it at bay, but she couldn't.

Why? Why had Maddie asked them to come down? She knew (Y/n) would rather talk to them over the phone than in person. She knew they never helped (Y/n) or made her feel better, they only put her down and caused arguments.

Maddie had clearly told them to come down and support their daughter and the fact that they had to be asked to come down here made (Y/n) feel worse. Was she that much of a burden that her parents had to be forced into visiting? They had to be told to show her comfort and support, and they couldn't even do that.

"You say that like you don't want to see us."

"Why would I want you to come down and berrate me? You never make us feel better, you just make things worse."

(Y/n) swung her right hand out in their direction before she pressed her face back into Eddie's shoulder. She felt his hand move to cup the back of her neck and he smothered his lips against her temple, breathing so harshly (Y/n) wondered if his lungs were going to pop.

"Will you even be at the wedding?"

Say no. Say no. Say no!

She didn't want them there. Eddie didn't want them there. Even Buck wasn't sure he wanted their parents at the wedding if they were going to cause nothing but misery and resentment. Staying away might be the best option for everyone involved.

"Of course we're going to be there." Margaret looked hurt for the first time, as if she had been nothing but flowers and roses and (Y/n) was the one berrating and belittling her, not the other way around.

"Why, you never came to Maddie's wedding." Buck spoke around the rim of his beer bottle with one brow arched up. He had never forgiven their parents for that.

He and (Y/n) both had big doubts about Doug when they first met him. They didn't like him. They saw how his temper flared and how Maddie would never be her usual self around him, she seemed to deflate and give in and never stand up around him. But they still went to the wedding. They were there for their big sister, they attended and put on brave faces and smiled. Their parents didn't even bother to make the effort.

"Evan, don't start that again. We want to be there, I may not have walked Maddie down the aisle but-"

"No, you didn't, and you won't be walking me down the aisle either. I want Buck to walk with me." (Y/n) unravelled herself from Eddie's arm and twisted to sit up taller in her seat. She looked towards her twin, waiting to try and gauge his reaction.

This was something she had talked about with Eddie and Maddie, but hadn't had the chance to ask Buck yet.

She didn't want their dad walking her down the aisle. (Y/n) didn't want that honour going to someone who didn't truly understand her or make the effort to love and connect with her. Buck was always there for her. He understood her, he loved and looked after her and he would do anything for her. (Y/n) wanted her brother walking down the aisle with her, be damned what anyone else had to say.

Eddie could feel himself calming down just a little when he glanced to the right and saw the proud, beaming smile that lit up Buck's face.

He sat straighter in his chair and tears welled in his eyes as he reached across to take his sister's hand, nodding silently. He couldn't help how proud it made him feel and the tinge of pride that swelled in his chest when he saw his father's disgruntled expression. He wasn't happy about being pushed out, and something about that made Buck happier. Like the twins were finally getting their own back for the years of mistreatment they had experienced.

"You two always have done things your own way." Margaret looked down at her hands with pursed lips and a crinkled nose that gave away how displeased she was. This wasn't proper. This wasn't traditional and this wasn't what she or Phillip wanted, but they didn't have a choice.

For such a brief, fleeting moment, the Buckley siblings- and Eddie- thought that was the end to the arguing tonight.

Maddie pushed up from the table, taking the empty plates into the kitchen while Buck grabbed the empty beer bottles and (Y/n)'s glass, going for refills. They could all use some liquid courage to get them through the rest of this night and refuel after the rough battle they'd just endured.

(Y/n) leaned her head back on Eddie's shoulder, taking a moment to pepper a few wet, open-mouthed kisses up and down his neck. She felt his hand slide under the table to squeeze her thigh while her dad got up from the table and stood between the table and the kitchen.

She heard her mother mutter 'well,' under her breath which was always a sign that something else was coming. Her head turned in her mother's direction, watching as she pushed up from the table and cradled her untouched glass of wine in her hands.

"At least you'll look better in your wedding photos now, without the bump or the baby weight."

She'd been stabbed.

It felt like a knife to the heart. (Y/n) could feel her dinner crawling up her throat and her heart was suddenly thumping and pounding against her ribs with such force that she doubled forward.

She didn't realise she was crying until she felt Eddie's thumb swiping over her cheek, catching at least three tears that fell. And when Eddie noticed (Y/n) had her arms bound around her stomach, his upper lip curled and his body set alight.

"Why would you even say something like that? What the Hell is wrong with you?!"

Whatever calming composure Eddie came here with tonight, it had well and truly burned to cinders. He wasn't sitting here listening to this anymore. He wasn't staying here if she was going to be so rude and uncaring towards (Y/n) like that. Who did she think she was? How on Earth did she believe saying something like that was in any way okay or justified.

It wasn't like (Y/n) had lost the baby months and months ago. It had barely been two months since the miscarriage. She was still recovering and trying her best to move forward after something so traumatic like that. Margaret was out of line and Eddie wouldn't let this continue.

They hadn't come here for (Y/n) to be victimised and attacked by her own mother. They were here for a family meal and for support and understanding, but the Buckley parents were never going to give that. They were never going to understand or feign love and compassion.

And Eddie was through with them.

"Oh fuck." Buck sank his teeth down into his lower lip, setting the bottle of wine down with a clink before he made a beeline for his parents.

He heard that last comment and he wasn't best pleased with his mother, but he knew Eddie like the back of his hand. He knew Eddie was about to flip and he wasn't the kind to back down or hold his tongue.

He could feel Maddie hot on his heels and the pair of them skidded into the dining area just as Eddie rounded the side of the table.

For a split second, Buck thought Eddie was going to throw a punch at his mother and he wasn't sure how to think about that. He wouldn't want his family throwing punches, but he didn't want his mother to get away with what she had just said that had his twin in tears.

He watched with panicked eyes as Eddie stood one foot away from Margaret, both hands clenched into fists at his sides. His height made him look down on her and Buck could see the artery throbbing in Eddie's neck like it was about to burst. His shoulders were quaking, his chest was heaving and straining against his shirt and the one thing holding him back was (Y/n).

She had one arm around her waist like she was trying to hug herself, and her other hand was gripping Eddie's bicep, but she couldn't bring herself to stand out of his shadow. She stayed behind him, hidden by his frame with her temple pressing into his back.

She wanted to pull him away but she didn't have the energy or the nerve. She wanted them both to back down, but she couldn't voice it. She wanted to go home, but she was rooted to the spot. Eddie was sticking up for her. No one other than Maddie or Buck had ever stood up to their parents in (Y/n)'s defence.

"I don't usually hit women, but if you say one more spiteful word to (Y/n), I might just rethink my morals."

Another bout of dread crept up in (Y/n)'s stomach and she moulded herself against Eddie's back, silently willing him not to. It would only cause more problems. She had never heard his voice become so low and gritty before like there was a raw, cut edge to his throat that sliced through his words.

Maddie clutched Buck's arm, both to gather some strength and to stop him from trying to interfere just yet. Someone was standing up to their parents, Eddie was fighting this alone and he didn't need their help.

They both watched Margaret straighten her shoulders but when she looked up at Eddie, she looked unusually meek and small.

"Don't raise your voice with me-"

"If you didn't disrespect your daughter like that then I wouldn't have to. Don't stand there and preach at me, lady, when you don't know the first thing about respect."

If the situation were any different, Buck would have given Eddie a thumbs up or a round of applause for that. His words were true. Margaret hadn't shown (Y/n) one ounce of respect tonight, all she had done was make her uncomfortable and had now reduced her to tears.

It seemed they had come to a stalemate, neither Eddie nor Margaret moving, twitching or even blinking. She had nothing to retort to that but she didn't want to back down and lose the little ounce of pride she had left.

(Y/n) finally shifted from standing behind Eddie to stand at his side, but still somehow tucked into his side like he was her armour. Her arms wrapped around his bicep that she pinned to her chest and she glanced her eyes over her parents before she looked at her siblings.

She wanted to go, but at the same time she didn't want to have to leave. They hadn't started this argument. Their parents had done this, they should be the ones to leave the apartment and let the siblings all cool off together. But she knew their parents weren't going to go unless Buck kicked them out. They would want to stay and talk to him and Maddie, to try and win them round and make Maddie play referee like she always did when they were younger.

"Are you done?" There was so much more (Y/n) wanted to say to them.

Are you done belittling me? Are you finished making a mockery of my pain? Will you stop proving that I was never the favourite daughter? Can you stop hurting me, for once, please?

She almost found it strange that her father hadn't said anything to Eddie to stand up for Margaret, he would never let (Y/n) or Buck argue with their mother the way Eddie just did. He always told them off. Maybe he was put off by the idea that Eddie was ready to throw punches. Maybe he knew defending her wasn't right. Perhaps he knew Eddie was right even if he was being rude about it, and Phillip didn't want to risk a fight with someone stronger and more capable than him.

She watched her mother turn to face Maddie who wouldn't even look at her parents. But Phillip turned in (Y/n)'s direction, shaking his head and holding his hands out at his sides like he didn't understand what was going on.

"Are you really going to follow your sister's footsteps and marry a wrong-un? A brute?"

His words should have insulted Eddie, but all he could do was toss his head back and cackle. His laugh was almost evil and it made (Y/n) shake at his side.

"That's funny. You had no problem with one daughter marrying an abusive bastard, but you have an issue with me because… what? I respect your daughter more than you do? Because I love her and you don't? God knows how the three of them put up with either of you."

Eddie's arm that was pinned against (Y/n)'s chest moved just a little so he could curl his hand around her hip, trying to give her some kind of comfort and understanding.

With a deep breath, she tugged on Eddie's arm, about to walk past her parents and aim for the door, but she stopped when Phillip leaned in their path. His eyes swept over her before they settled on Eddie who waited, unabashed, for the snide remark he was clearly about to get because Phillip wanted the last word here.

And if they had been any other words, Eddie would have let him have this moment. He would of stood down and let Phillip have his way, if the choice words he spoke hadn't been so damning and intrusive.

"You know, we had a feeling this shotgun wedding was because she was pregnant. That's your style though, isn't it? Evan told us you married your first wife because you got her pregnant. I guess this time you didn't count on (Y/n) losing it."

A strangled sound left (Y/n)'s lips when Eddie moved. She tripped, twisting to the left so her chest meshed up against Eddie's and both her hands let go of his arm to clutch his shirt in her fists so tightly she started to tear the material. Her forehead pushed into his chest, her face meshing in his shirt as her feet tangled with his when he tried to move. But he couldn't get far with (Y/n) stood in front of him, clinging to him like a protective bullet-proof vest.

His fist had been less than an inch away from Phillip before (Y/n) was in front of him.

Both fists grabbed Phillip by the shoulders, shaking so hard that the older man was shuddering back and forth on the spot. Eddie wanted to yank him close enough to either throw him down or throw a punch, but (Y/n) was in the way. She was pinning herself to his chest, knowing he couldn't start a fight with her there. If she were behind him, Eddie could easily lay into his father in law, but like this, he couldn't do anything without hurting (Y/n) in the process.

"Eddie no." (Y/n) tilted her head up enough to look at him through tears, shrinking closer when she felt her dad's hands on her shoulders to try and steady himself in Eddie's grip.

With a rough shove, Eddie all but threw Phillip back causing him to stumble and lose his footing, barely regaining his balance by leaning into the kitchen counter.

"Go fuck yourself." The words spat like venom on his tongue before he looked down at the girl clinging to his chest.

His trembling hands moved, one hand cupping the back of her neck while the other bound around her waist. He tilted his head down and smothered his lips into her hair, breathing so harsh and heavy that he felt like he was going to pass out. He felt Buck's hands on his shoulders, pulling him back while Maddie stood to one side, hand covering her mouth, tears falling down her face.

Both Buck's hands dug into Eddie's shoulders for a few moments before he moved his hand down to his sister's arm, giving a light squeeze. When his eyes darted over to his parents who had taken a few steps back, all he could see was red.

"Get out. You've done enough damage tonight, you shouldn't have come down after all."

Twisting to the side, Buck curved himself around (Y/n)'s back so neither of them were looking at their parents. He and Maddie were wrong to talk to them and see if they would try and show some kindness and concern towards (Y/n). They should have left things how they were and let their parents keep the distance and make mistakes.

(Y/n) shuddered when she felt Eddie's chest rumble as he growled "What are you waiting for?" and she was sure he added "Fuck off." at the end while he pointed towards the door.

She didn't open her eyes or attempt to move until the apartment echoed with the sound of the front door slamming shut. Her hands stayed deadlocked in Eddie's shirt and she tilted her head up just enough to look into his enraged eyes.

"Are you okay?"

She couldn't find her voice, all she managed to do was nod, although she wasn't sure if she was being truthful or not. She wanted to sit down. She wanted to curl up on the sofa and pretend tonight had never happened.

The tears finally stopped falling as she felt Eddie's hand glide up the back of her neck to cradle her head and he peppered wet kisses against her temple, his breathing finally starting to mellow out. And she could feel her brother stood at her side, still gripping her shoulder while Maddie advanced over and squeezed her arm.

(Y/n) knew one thing for certain. If Eddie hadn't been here tonight to stand up for her, that would have gone a whole lot worse.

#911 imagine #imagine #eddie diaz x reader #evan buckley #eddie diaz imagine #eddie x reader #eddie diaz #maddie buckley #eddie diaz family

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piastree · 9 months

Text

Take a Chance with Me | OP81

oscar piastri x reader (fc: huh yunjin)

— Part 1

Next Part

Summary : Y/n's mistakenly takes someone's drink at a party. Despite the initial embarrassment, they engage in light chit-chat and discover a sense of familiarity. Oscar introduces himself, and they exchange greetings, marking the beginning of a new chapter in their story.

Notes: hiii! this is my first writing, if there are any grammatical errors or some other mistakes i wanna apologize in advance. I hope you like it and have fun while reading this<3 lemme know if you like it thankyouuuu

Y/n chuckled when she remembered how embrassed it was when she took the wrong glass and sipped it like nothing was wrong. But she could feel the confused look from someone beside her. "I'm thinking you might have grabbed mine by mistake." She glanced to her side, wondering if the words she had just heard were indeed meant for her.

"Huh?" She finally turned to fully face that man. He chuckled at her puzzled expression, but eventually, with a raised eyebrow, he pointed to the glass she was holding. "Oh my goodness! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to take your drink." Her eyes widened in shock, and her heart raced as embarrassment flooded over her. He held back his laughter. "No worries. I can take another one," as he said, he cracked a grin like a friendly cat. His eyes squinted playfully, giving off a vibe that was both laid-back and amused. "Let me grab you another one." "No need for that, I-" Ignoring him, she sauntered away to fetch a new drink, intending to replace the one she had mistakenly taken from him earlier. It didn't take long for y/n to return. Once she returned, they engaged in light chit-chat, chatting about who invited them to the party. It wasn't until later that she realized the guy she'd been talking to looked kind of familiar. "So, which friend brought you here tonight?" she asked. "Oh, just through some mates, racing circles and all. What about you?" "Just here with a friend. By the way, you seem oddly familiar. Have we met before?" "I get that a lot. Maybe you've seen me on the street or something."

She just laughed, shrugged it off, and took another sip of her drink. At the same time, he shot her a cheeky smile, sneaking a few glances while she checked out the scene around her. After a bit, he decided to break the ice, "I'm Oscar, by the way."

"I'm y/n. Nice to meet you, Oscar."

With a cheerful smile, they exchanged a warm handshake. It marked the beginning of a new chapter in their story.

oscarpiastri

liked by yourusername, landonorris, mclaren and 365,288 others

oscarpiastri Wowee… that was a cool weekend 🧡

view all 3,637 comments

user just calm down bro, it's your first season💀

user our starboy!! so proud🧡🧡

user what an incredible talent boyyy!

yourusername such a fake rookie

oscarpiastri i like to keep things low-key🤭

yourusername can't wait for another surprise then

user lmaooo

user your pace and overtakes are 1000/10 🔥👏🏻

yourusername

liked by oscarpiastri, yourbff and 1,288 others

yourusername camera crumbs

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yourbff MYY GIRLLLL<3

user cutiesssss

oscarpiastri those flowers have nothing compared to u

yourusername lol you're making the flowers jealous, i'll let the garden know it needs an upgrade😂

user what oscar is doing here????

user did i miss something??

user OSCAR?!!?????? FLIRTING TO A GIRL???

yourusername chill guys he likes to joke around😂😂

user new wag alert!!

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bring it home, boy!

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user wow??? what is this now??

landonorris where is the cheer for me??? i thought we were friends yourusername lol we are! yourusername goodluck lando! i'd love to see both of you on the podium<3

yourusername

tagged: oscarpiastri, landonorris

liked by oscarpiastri, landonorris, yourbff and 14,555 others

yourusername P2 and P3, boys!! Enjoy your moments. What a day to remember 🧡

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user CUTEE OUTFIT Y/N!!

user and now lando also here? who's she

user wow oscar put earmuffs on her??

user at this point i won't believe if they're just friends

landonorris oh now i'm your friend?? cool thanks

oscarpiastri stop overacting💀

yourusername should i post a whole photo dedication for you?😉

landonorris i'm not looking for trouble

user what is that mean landooo?? bcoz someone must be jealous?😂

user look at how oscar defending her lol

oscarpiastri you owe me a drawing of a four-leaf clover on my helmet

yourusername stay tuned for some top-notch artistry<3

user oscar indirectly said that y/n was his lucky charm!!

"Can't you stay for one more night?" Oscar asked. He walks over to y/n who is arranging her luggage a little hurriedly.

Y/n smiled before saying, "work can't wait. But I promise I'll come another day."

"Okay, i'll counting the days until you return."

She laughs, then stands up and pulls Oscar into her arms. "You're doing a good job. Keep going!"

"I'll miss you." He hugs her tighter, as if he's not willing to let her go.

"Me too."

They fall into a moment of silence, soaking in each other's warmth before having to go back to being apart for a period of time they don't know how long.

She never expect the party that night to lead her into a complicated situation, where she has to love someone who is out of her reach. Remembering how stupid she was that night for not recognizing Oscar right away when his face looked so familiar, and how Oscar didn't say anything until she finally realized.

"Oh! I have something for you."

She opens her bag and takes something out. A bracelet with a four-leaf clover. "I don't have the skill to draw, and I wouldn't risk making your helmet look ugly."

Oscar takes the bracelet and immediately puts it on. "I can't agree more. But it's more than enough," he replies mischievously while laughing. He is so happy to see the bracelet now neatly wrapped around his wrist. "Thank you."

"Your lucky charm when I'm not around."

yourusername

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri, yourbff and 16,581 others

yourusername life lately😴

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user syntax error babe my brain stopped working when i saw u

user i just can’t get enough of this hair omg

user me too! so gorgeous😭

yourbff red y/n is too legendary

comment liked by oscarpiastri

yourusername is this genuinely a compliment or a subtle jab?

yourbff lmaoo babe😭

oscarpiastri wish u were here

yourusername me too</3

user oh you are not with oscar rn :(

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oscarpiastri

liked by yourusername, lewishamilton, charles_leclerc and 221,681 others

oscarpiastri A second reason to smile 😁🏆

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mclaren what a weekend!

user this man’s gonna be world champion one day🙌

comment liked by yourusername

user i refuse to believe you’re a rookie man

yourusername me too

user y/n camping on oscar's comment section

yourusername my driver of the day!❤️

oscarpiastri ❤️

user what's with the red heart???

user is it the soft launch? OMGGG

yourusername also congrats to lando!! proud of both of you🔥👏

landonorris thankyou, y/n! btw come to the race, someone is missing you

user man is so wHIPPED

yourusername p.s hope oscar recovered well after lying on the floor

comment liked by oscarpiastri

yourusername added a story

someone is smiling ear to ear @/oscarpiastri

yourbff lmaooo he looks so happy yourbff he's completely in love with you yourusername grateful is an understatement<3

landonorris his eyes speak love lol yourusername shut upp lando landonorris glad both of you finally opened up about your feelings yourusername thankyou 2 u❤️

user his emotions are written all over his face

oscarpiastri

liked by yourusername, logansargent, landonorris and 540,188 others

oscarpiastri thanks for mistakenly grabbing my drink. Grateful for every twist of fate that brought you into my life🍻❤️

view all 5555 comments

user spill the tea we want to know more about the storyy!!

user my oscar and yn cutie<3

user hope for your happiness, oscar and y/n!❤️

landonorris how long did it take you, mate?

yourusername felt like forever

oscarpiastri you have no idea

yourusername but it was worth the wait

user awww y/n🥺

oscarpiastri ❤️

yourusername thankyou for never telling me you are oscar piastri the mclaren driver of formula 1😒

user NOOOO SHE MUST BE SO CLUELESS

logansargent he is the worst

oscarpiastri u know i didn't mean to keep it a secret, babe

user THEY ARE SO CUTEEEE

yourusername

liked by oscarpiastri, charles_leclerc, georgerussell63 and 85,128 others

yourusername love you always, Oz! May the four-leaf clovers always on us🍀❤️

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oscarpiastri love you too, always🍀❤️

comment liked by yourusername

thankyou for reading! don't hesitate to give me a feedback❤️

#oscar piastri #oscar piastri imagine #oscar piastri x reader #oscar piastri fanfic #oscar piastri au #f1 fic #f1 fluff #f1 fanfic #oscar piastri x you #oscar piastri fluff #f1 smau #f1 imagine #f1 x reader

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03jyh23 · 4 months

Text

— 2 soon || kim hongjoong part 1

goes to waste the series based on my favourite keshi songs

(listen here)

idol!hongjoong x non-idol!reader

synopsis: years after choosing his career over you, hongjoong still finds himself haunted by the memories of you. your relationship is a constant dance of on and off, and you cannot stay away from him.

genre: lovers to strangers to ?, angst, smut

trigger warnings: cussing/mature language, break-ups, toxic relationships, possessiveness, toxic jealousy, sex as a coping mechanism, excessive alcohol usage, emotional manipulation, obsession, verbal aggression, emotional distress, mentions of clubbing, career-related stress, explicit sexual content: making out, protected sex (condom), mentions of using birth control, pet names baby, princess, handjob, blowjob, hair pulling, neck kisses, dirty talk, nipple play (?), missionary

words: 12.8 k

reminder: what you’re about to read is purely fiction, so let’s keep it separate from reality.

!minors do not interact!

— hi there! after several intense days of work, it's finally here! the first part of the goes to waste series! while writing 2 soon, i had many negative thoughts and was very self-critical. im still not sure if i did a good job - especially when it comes to smut. smut is the genre where i probably will never feel good enough, but believe me, im really trying. the second part is already in the process of being written. im handing this over to you; thank you very much for such a warm reception of this series, and i hope you'll enjoy it. and please let me know if i missed any trigger warnings for the sexual content!

love, monika. ♡

if you enjoyed this post, i’d be so grateful for a little love – a like, reblog or comment would truly make my day!

taglist: @skittyneos @kyeos4ng @vcutparis

one

There you were, unexpectedly positioned in a scenario you never once imagined you would find yourself in. It was the middle of the night, the hour when all was quiet and still. Your ordinarily vibrant living room was dimmed, with only a single floor lamp in the corner casting long, dramatic shadows across the room. You were nestled into the corner of the worn-out comfortable sofa, hugging a pillow close as if it were your only lifeline. The only sounds filling the silence were the words from your boyfriend, each one hanging heavy in the cold air. You were painfully aware of what was coming, a gut-wrenching feeling of imminent heartbreak washing over you. The reality of the situation was that there was no escaping this conversation, no possibility of emerging unscathed. The knowledge that Hongjoong was about to shatter your heart into pieces was a bitter pill to swallow. This moment was the beginning of an end you had never anticipated. And it was happening tonight.

"The company believes that you will become a distraction," Hongjoong said, his voice laced with an undercurrent of tension.

"I don't give a damn about your stupid company," you retorted, your hand trembling and your eyes welling up with tears that threatened to spill over at any moment. "I wasn't a distraction all these years when you were a trainee, so why am I suddenly one now?" Hongjoong paced nervously across the room, his movements betraying his inner turmoil. He was torn between the company and you, and he didn't know how to navigate this minefield.

"Y/N..." he sighed heavily, his hand running through his hair in a nervous gesture. "Now that Ateez is gaining more attention after our first prize win and the new album coming soon, the company..." he trailed off, unable to finish his sentence. "They believe I need to remain more focused."

"I don't fucking care about what they think, Hongjoong!" you shouted, your voice cracking with the weight of your emotions. "You think I give a damn about their opinion?" you continued, your voice rising with each word. "They don't know us, they don't know what we've been through. All they see is some stupid company policy, but they don't see the love that we share." Tears welled up in your eyes as you spoke, the pain of the situation threatening to consume you whole. You had never felt so helpless, so powerless.

"Please, try to calm down. You're not making this any easier," Hongjoong pleaded, his voice barely above a whisper.

''I don’t fucking believe that after almost three years they decided I will become a problem...'' Your voice cracked, tears finally spilling down your cheeks. Hongjoong looked at you, his eyes filled with sorrow and regret. It was clear that this conversation was tearing him apart just as much as it was you. "Hongjoong, do you believe what they're saying?" you asked, your voice filled with a mixture of fear and desperation. "Do you think they're right?"

He paused, his back still turned towards you. "I... I don't know, Y/N," he confessed, his voice barely audible. "What if they are right?" The question hung in the air, a haunting doubt that only added to the heartache. Your heart pounded in your chest, the words echoing in your mind.

"You already believed them…'' you asserted, your voice tinged with a hint of defiance. ''I can't believe that you see me as a distraction now." With a frustrated cry, you grabbed the pillow and hurled it across the room, the action serving as a physical release for the pent-up anger and despair that threatened to consume you. "Fuck it, Hongjoong," you choked out, tears streaming down your cheeks. "I need you to choose me. I need you to fight for us, for our love. Because if you don't, then what's the point of any of this?"

There was a long silence before he finally spoke. "I...I need to do what's best for my career," he answered softly, sounding utterly defeated. "And if that means that we..." his voice trailed off and he didn't finish the sentence. You felt a lump in your throat and fought back the tears.

''So, you’re going to leave me?'' Hongjoong turned to face you, his eyes filled with a mixture of sorrow and resignation.

"What else am I supposed to do?" Hongjoong's eyes flickered with pain as he met your gaze, his own turmoil reflected in the depths of his gaze. "I can't lose my career, Y/N! It's everything I've worked for.'' His words cut through you like a knife, searing through your heart. You had always known that his career was important to him, but you had never imagined that he would be willing to sacrifice your relationship for it. ''I’m sorry, Y/N,'' he managed to say, his voice filled with regret. ''I have to do this.''

"Just say it already..." Your voice was shaky, the tension in the room was palpable, and the silence that followed was deafening.

"I want to break up," Hongjoong finally said, his voice barely audible but clear enough for you to hear.

Your voice broke as you responded, "If this is your decision, then I'm not going to fight it. I won't beg you to stay, Hongjoong." The room was filled with a painful silence after your words. The reality of what was happening hit you both, but you stood your ground. "No, I won't beg," you affirmed, your voice steady despite the tears streaming down your face. "If this is what you've chosen, then I have no right to stop you. But remember this, Hongjoong, love is not a distraction. It's what keeps us human." He looked at you, his eyes welling up with unshed tears.

"I'm sorry, Y/N," he whispered, the regret in his voice tangible.

"I need you to leave," you said, your voice barely above a whisper. The room fell silent again. With a heavy sigh, Hongjoong cast a long, lingering glance in your direction, his eyes filled with a sadness he had never felt before. You couldn't meet his gaze, your own eyes fixated on the worn-out fabric of the couch, your hands clenched tightly in your lap.

"I'm so sorry, Y/N," he repeated, his voice just as quiet as yours. He hovered for a moment, as if waiting for you to say something else, offering him a way out of this situation. But there was nothing more to be said. The decision had been made.

"I'm sorry too, Hongjoong," you whispered into the silence, your voice trembling. The words echoed in the quiet room, a bitter acknowledgment of the pain that both of you were feeling. Slowly, Hongjoong headed towards the door, his steps heavy and uncertain. Each footstep felt like a punch to your heart, amplifying the emptiness that was beginning to set in. As the front door opened, a shiver went down your spine. With one last look, Hongjoong closed the door behind him, leaving you alone in the quiet apartment. The silence was deafening, the absence of his presence felt like a void. You sat there, motionless, the harsh reality of what had just happened slowly sinking in. Eventually, you rose from the couch, your legs feeling like jelly. You switched off the lamp, plunging the room into darkness. You could still feel the remnants of Hongjoong's presence, the memories of your time together felt almost tangible. But, he was gone. And you were left to pick up the pieces of your shattered heart, alone. Your small apartment never felt lonelier.

two

The room was dimly lit by a single lamp, casting shadows everywhere. Hongjoong sat on the hotel floor, his heart ached like a heavy stone in his chest, echoing the raw, jagged pain of an all-too-fresh wound. Next to him sat a half-empty bottle of whiskey, its strong liquor failing to dull the hollow gnawing pain that gripped him. For the past few months, Hongjoong had been busier than he'd ever been. Recording sessions that kept him up all night, followed by grueling dance practices to perfect choreography. Once ATEEZ’s first studio album was finally out, there was an endless string of fan sign events and meetings. Then, his dreams came true — they announced a world tour. Hongjoong was so busy that eating and sleeping felt like a luxury. He was happy, but not completely. Something was always missing. You were missing. Hongjoong'd become a master at hiding his pain from the world. So good, in fact, that he'd even managed to hide it from himself. But even as busy as Hongjoong was with his career, there were moments when he couldn't help but constantly think about you. And in those small moments every song that he wrote, every dance he choreographed, every performance he gave, you were always on his mind. Hongjoong was haunted by your memories, by the love he had lost. And even if he was being so good at hiding his emotions, his bandmates could see the change in him. They saw the sadness in his eyes, the heaviness in his steps, the emptiness in his laughter. But they said nothing, respecting his silence, knowing that this was a battle he had to fight on his own. Now, it’s been over six months since he broke up with you. Since he had chosen his career over your love, ambition over affection. He believed it was the right decision, but it did not lessen the pain of his heartbreak.

Hongjoong's eyes fell on his phone, lying innocently on the carpet. He had been contemplating it for hours, his heart pounding with apprehension. He longed to reach out to you, to hear your voice again and beg for forgiveness. Everything seemed so pointless without you. His dreams and ambitions felt hollow and meaningless. The fame, the success, the love from fans all over the world — none of it mattered. Because without you by his side, sharing in his joy and success, it all felt empty. All he could think of was the sweet sound of your laughter, the warmth of your touch, the comfort of your presence. And the longer he was without you, the more he realized how much he had lost. Taking a shaky breath, Hongjoong gathered the courage to pick the phone up, dialed your number with unsteady fingers, and pressed the call button. Eight rings echoed in his ears, each one a chance to hang up, to retreat, to save himself from the impending heartache. But he didn't. He couldn't.

"Hello?"

"H-hey," His voice wavered, barely more than a whisper, "How... how you been? How you doing?" His heart pounded against his ribs. The room felt smaller with every passing second as if the walls were closing in on him. Hongjoong gripped the phone tighter, his knuckles turning white as if holding onto it was the only thing keeping him grounded at that moment.

"I've been... okay," your voice was guarded, a stark contrast to the warmth it used to hold when you spoke to him. "Just... keeping busy, you know." Your heart was pounding loudly, so loud you were scared Hongjoong was going to hear it on the other side of the phone. You tried to steady your breathing, focusing on each exhale and inhale. There was silence on the other end. You could almost picture Hongjoong there, sitting in the dimly lit room, phone in hand, as he grappled with your words. The silence stretched on and for a moment.

"I've... I've been drinking," he confessed, a bitter laughter escaping his lips. "Thought I'd be over you by now... but I'm not. I can't be." His voice cracked, raw emotion spilling out. There was a pause again, a silence that seemed to last forever.

"Hongjoong..." you murmured, your voice filled with a detached understanding that was almost more painful than the silence before. "You... You shouldn't be drinking, Hongjoong," you said softly, concern seeping into your voice despite your best efforts to keep it neutral.

"I miss you," he whispered, his voice barely audible. "I... I know I caused you pain. I know I can't turn back time. But I... I can't imagine a life without you." The line went silent once again, except for his ragged breath and the deafening beat of his heart. Hongjoong held his breath, waiting, knowing that your next words could either set him free or push him further into his torment. Despite the distance, despite the coldness in your voice, he thought he detected a hint of lingering affection for him. It was subtle, nearly imperceptible, but it was there. A slight hesitation in your voice before you spoke, a soft sigh he barely caught. It gave him a glimmer of hope, but also a sea of despair. Because he knew that even though you might still harbor feelings for him, his choices had wounded you.

"I miss you too," you said, your voice so quiet that he almost missed the words. And in that moment, he knew that you felt the pain just as sharply as he did. Despite the remnants of love between you, you were both trapped in this cycle of regret and longing, both victims of his ambition. He longed to tell you that he loved you, that he was ready to give up everything to be with you. But the words wouldn't come. Because he knew he couldn't. He couldn't let go of his career, but he couldn't let go of you either. And so, he found himself stuck in this self-destructive cycle, driven by his own choices and his inability to let go of the past. The burden of his decisions hung heavy in the silence. His heart ached with unspoken words and the bitter sting of regret.

"I want to see you..." Hongjoong whispered into the phone, as he took another swig of the whiskey, the bitter liquid burning his throat, a fitting punishment for his mistakes. He closed his eyes, the image of your face clear in his mind, the memory of your laughter echoing in his ears. He missed you. He missed you more than he could put into words, more than he could bear. But all he had were his dreams and ambitions, the things he chose over you. ''I don’t know what I’m expecting'' All Hongjoong knew was that he missed you and that no amount of fame or success could fill the void you left in his heart.

"I... I want to see you too," you responded, soft and hesitant, yet filled with a longing that mirrored his own. Since the day Hongjoong left, your world had changed drastically, nothing felt the same. You tried to move on, to heal and rebuild your life without him. But it seemed like every time you made a little progress, something related to ATEEZ would unexpectedly appear, pulling you back into the memories of him. It was as if the universe was conspiring to ensure Hongjoong remained an inescapable part of your life, refusing to let you forget him.

"I don't know if this is a good idea...but, can we meet?" Hongjoong held his breath, waiting for your response, the silence between you two stretching out into a deafening void.

"Okay," you finally whispered back, the single word carrying a world of hope and fear, a promise of a reunion fraught with uncertainties and unspoken feelings. A wave of relief washed over Hongjoong, followed by a pang of anxiety. He had so many things he wanted to say to you, so many apologies to make, so many feelings to confess. But he feared that it might be too late, that the damage he had caused was irreparable. He swallowed hard, the lump in his throat making it difficult for him to speak.

"Thank you," he managed to whisper, his voice barely audible. "I'll be back home in a few weeks, I’ll see you then?"

"Yeah...yeah, I'll see you then," you replied softly, your voice tinged with a mixture of anticipation and apprehension. "Take care of yourself, Hongjoong.''

The call ended, leaving Hongjoong alone in the dimly lit room once again. He sat there, staring at his phone, his heart heavy with a mix of relief, fear, and longing. He didn't know if this was the beginning of a new chapter or the closure of an old one. All he knew was that he needed to see you. He needed to say the things he had been unable to say for the past six months. And most importantly, he needed to apologize.

three

The interminable weeks you anxiously awaited for Hongjoong's return seemed to mercilessly drag on, transforming into a seemingly endless expanse of time. In truth, the past few months without him felt like an eternity, every moment punctuated by his absence. After the initial shock of your breakup, which shook you to your core, you managed to shake off the immobilizing numbness that it brought. Once the initial shock was dealt with, you allowed yourself to fall into a routine, an everyday pattern of activities that became your lifeline in these challenging times. This routine, mundane as it might have been, was the only thing that kept you going, the only thing that kept you sane amidst the tumult of emotions that threatened to consume you. It was your anchor in a sea of chaos, providing a sense of normalcy in a world that, without Hongjoong, felt anything but normal. So, when you saw the news that ATEEZ had returned from their tour, it took you by surprise. You thought Hongjoong would call you straight away, that he would want to see you as much as you wanted to see him. You were holding on to the thought of seeing the man you loved again, of finding closure, or perhaps a new beginning. But the call didn't come, and with each passing day, your hope dwindled a little more. The silence was deafening, filling you with a sense of dread and disappointment. But despite everything, you continued to wait, clinging on to the hope of hearing from him. Days turned into weeks, and the silence from Hongjoong was deafening. You tried to keep yourself busy, to distract your mind from the painful thoughts that threatened to consume you. You began to question his intentions, wondering whether he really meant what he said during the phone call. Did he truly miss you, or was it just a moment of weakness? Did he genuinely want to see you, or was he simply trying to ease his guilt? Your mind was a whirlpool of questions, doubts, and insecurities. You felt like you were trapped in a never-ending cycle of hope and despair. Despite the emotional turmoil, you couldn't bring yourself to reach out to him first. You weren't ready to face the possibility of rejection, the fear of him telling you that he had moved on and that the phone call was a mistake. So, you waited, hoping against hope that he would contact you.

One evening, while you were trying to drown your sorrows in a sad movie and a tub of ice cream, the doorbell rang, startling you out of your thoughts. Your heart pounded in your chest as you got up to answer it. As you swung the door open, there he was. Hongjoong stood on your doorstep, looking just as nervous and scared as you felt. You were taken aback, not having expected him to show up at your doorstep. You felt a mix of emotions - surprise, fear, anxiety, but also a strange relief. Despite the emotional turmoil swirling within you, you couldn't help but feel a rush of warmth at the sight of him. He was as handsome as always, his dark blue hair tousled slightly, his eyes filled with a mixture of apprehension and longing. For a moment, you found yourself lost in the depths of his gaze, the familiar warmth of his presence washing over you like a comforting embrace. It was surreal to see him standing there, on your doorstep, after so many weeks of silence and uncertainty. Your heart pounded in your chest, each beat echoing the tumult of emotions that raged within you.

"H-Hey," he stuttered out, his eyes avoiding yours. "I hope I'm not... I hope this isn't too soon."

"No, it's... it's okay. Come in," you said, stepping aside to let him in. He hesitated for a moment, then walked inside. You closed the door behind him, it felt strangely normal to have him there, in your apartment, as if the last few months had been nothing but a bad dream. But the tension in the air was palpable, a reminder that things weren't the same anymore. You led him to the living room, he took a deep breath, his gaze wandering around the room, taking in the familiar surroundings.

"It's been a while," he said, his voice barely above a whisper.

"Yes, it has," you replied, trying to keep your voice steady. The silence that followed was deafening, both of you lost in your own thoughts. Finally, Hongjoong broke the silence.

"I... I wanted to apologize," he began, his voice shaky. "I know I hurt you, and I'm... I'm really sorry." He looked at you, his eyes filled with regret. "I made a mistake... a big one. And I... I want to make it right." You were silent for a moment, processing his words. It was what you had been waiting to hear, but now that he had said it, you didn't know how to respond. You looked at him, studying his face, searching for sincerity in his eyes. Despite the hurt and confusion swirling within you, you couldn't deny the flicker of hope that ignited at his words. His apology felt genuine, raw with emotion. As you wrestled with your thoughts, a part of you longed to forgive him, to embrace the possibility of reconciliation. Yet another part remained guarded, wary of opening yourself up to further pain. You took a deep breath, trying to steady your racing heart. "I've missed you so much," he confessed. Suddenly, Hongjoong reached out, pulling you into an embrace. The sudden movement startled both of you, but neither of you pulled away. On the contrary, you nestled deeper into his arms, burying your face into the crook of his neck. The familiar scent of his cologne instantly calmed your racing heart, making you feel like you were home again. In his arms, the pain and heartache of the past few months seemed to melt away. As you held each other in a tight embrace, the weight of the past few months began to lift, replaced by a sense of comfort and familiarity. Despite the pain and uncertainty that had plagued your relationship, being in his arms felt right, as if you were finally where you were meant to be.

"I've missed you too," you whispered, your voice barely above a breath. The words were a confession, a raw admission of the emptiness that had consumed you in his absence. The warmth of his embrace melted away the walls you had built around your heart. Despite the doubts and uncertainties that lingered in the back of your mind, you couldn't deny the overwhelming rush of emotions that surged through you. Without thinking, you lifted your head from the crook of his neck, meeting Hongjoong’s gaze with tear-filled eyes. At that moment, all the words you had been longing to say seemed to vanish from your mind, replaced by a desperate need to express the depth of your feelings for him. Leaning forward, you closed the distance between you, capturing his lips in a tender, passionate kiss. For a fleeting moment, it felt as though time stood still, the world around you fading into oblivion as you lost yourself in the intoxicating warmth of his embrace. In that moment, all the pain and heartache of the past seemed insignificant, overshadowed by the overwhelming rush of love and longing that coursed through your veins. As you pulled away, breathless and trembling, you found yourself staring into his eyes, searching for some sign of understanding, of reciprocation. Hongjoong smiled and giggled quietly,

''I did not expect this…'' Your heart fluttered at the sound of his soft laughter, a gentle melody that filled the room. Despite the gravity of the situation, his laughter was like a balm to your wounded soul, easing some of the tension that had been building within you. Hongjoong’s hand found its way to your flushed cheek, it was a comforting presence, his touch sending shivers down your spine as you leaned into his touch, relishing the warmth of his palm against your skin.

"I know," you replied softly, a smile tugging at the corners of your lips.

''Can we do it again?'' A soft chuckle escaped your lips at his bashful demeanor, finding it endearing how he could still manage to blush after all this time.

"Of course," you replied, a playful glint in your eye as you leaned in closer to him. The warmth of Hongjoong’s breath against your skin sent a thrill coursing through you, reigniting the spark of desire that had never truly faded between you. Closing the distance between you, you pressed your lips to his once more, savoring his familiar taste and feel. It was as if no time had passed at all, as if you were picking up right where you had left off, lost in the intensity of your love for each other. As you pulled away breathlessly, the intensity of the moment lingering between you, Hongjoong placed his forehead against yours, his hand pulling you closer by your waist. His touch sent shivers down your spine, igniting a fire within you that had been dormant for far too long. The kiss deepened, growing more passionate and needy. Your bodies pressed together, the heat between you rising. Hongjoong's voice was husky when he pulled back, his breath hot against your ear as he said,

"I'm not gonna stop myself if we keep on." You could feel his arousal pressing against you, a stark reminder of the intimacy you hadn't shared in so long. A shiver ran through your body as you processed his words, your heart pounding in your chest. You had missed this closeness, the intoxicating intimacy that only Hongjoong could provide. Despite the uncertainties that still lingered, your body yearned for his. You met his gaze, your eyes reflecting the desire that was undoubtedly mirrored in his.

"Then don't stop," you murmured, your voice barely a whisper. There was no hesitation in his actions then. His lips found yours again, his hands exploring your body, reigniting the flame that had never fully extinguished. Hongjoong's grip on your hips tightened, his touch electrifying, igniting a spark within you. He pulled your hair just the way you liked it, gentle yet firm, exposing your neck to his gaze. He began to leave a trail of wet kisses along your sensitive skin, his warm breath causing shivers to run down your spine. The anticipation was unbearable. You knew that after all this time, after all the longing and desire that had built up between you, you wouldn’t last long. Every fiber of your being was desperate to feel his body against yours, to experience the intimate connection that only he could provide. And as if he could read your thoughts, Hongjoong returned to kissing you, his lips capturing yours in a passionate embrace. He was devouring you with an intensity that took your breath away, his every touch and kiss stoking the fire within you. You felt his hands tugging at the hem of your hoodie, his fingers deftly pulling it over your head in one swift, practiced motion. As the fabric lifted away, the cool air of the room hit your skin, causing a shiver to course through your body. To Hongjoong's surprise, you were not wearing a bra underneath. His eyes, dark with desire, roamed over your exposed chest, taking in the sight of your bare skin. There was a moment of silence as he savored the sight, his breath hitching in his throat. Your head was spinning, a whirlwind of emotions and sensations taking over, and you could feel yourself getting wetter with each passing second. Hongjoong placed his palm on your breast, cupping it gently but firmly. His touch was warm against your skin, a stark contrast to the cool air surrounding you. His fingers, tender and explorative, began to play with your nipple, tracing delicate patterns that sent waves of pleasure coursing through your body. You moaned softly. Each touch ignited a spark within you, a flame of desire that seemed to grow with every passing second.

As your hands began to wander, you found yourself drawn to his jeans. Your fingers deftly unclasped his belt, the metallic clink echoing in the room. Heart pounding with anticipation, you slid the zipper down, the sound seeming to reverberate through the room. Hongjoong quickly removed his own shirt, revealing his toned chest. Your hands instinctively reached out to him, your fingers tracing the lines of his muscles. In response, he wrapped his arms around you, lifting you off the ground with ease. Hongjoong carried you towards the bedroom, and a sense of anticipation filled the air. As he gently put you down, your eyes locked with his, the intensity of his gaze sending shivers down your spine. His lips found yours again in a deep, passionate kiss while his hands roamed over your body, further stoking the flame of desire within you. You found yourself lost in his touch, each stroke of his fingers sending waves of pleasure coursing through your body. As he slowly moved down, peppering soft kisses along your neck and collarbone, you could hardly contain the moan that escaped your lips. Hongjoong pulled your shorts down, kissing your stomach and hip bones. His touch was electrifying, setting your skin ablaze with a hunger that only he could satisfy. You reached for his pants, finally tugging both them and his boxers down and revealing his throbbing erection. Hongjoong groaned as you wrapped your fingers around his thick dick, you spread pre-cum on his length and stroked him gently yet firmly, eliciting a moan from him. Hongjoong was so hard, so ready for you, and the thought only made you wetter. With a mischievous glint in your eyes, you knelt in front of him and placed a kiss on the tip of his throbbing length. Sensing his anticipation, you started licking him from the base all the way to the tip, savoring the taste of him. His body shivered in response to your actions, his breath hitching as he watched you with a mixture of desire and disbelief.

"I missed the way your cock tastes in my mouth,” you said just before you slowly took him all into your mouth, your lips wrapping around his length as you began to bob your head up and down. The sensation elicited a groan from Hongjoong, his hands instinctively reaching for your hair to guide your movements.

"F-fuck," Hongjoong moaned out, his grip on your hair tightening as you continued to pleasure him with your mouth, your tongue swirling around his length in a way that had him seeing stars. His body was tense, filled with an anticipation that was only heightened by the rhythm of your movements. The room was filled with the sound of his ragged breathing and the wet noises of your mouth on him. His hand tugged at your hair, guiding you, setting the pace. His other hand found its way to your shoulder, his fingers digging into your skin as he struggled to keep control. "I... I need to be inside you," he gasped, the words barely more than a whisper. You looked up at him, your eyes locking with his. There was a raw intensity in his gaze that sent a thrill coursing through you. You nodded, releasing him from your mouth with a final lick, a smirk playing on your lips as you watched him shudder at the sensation. You crawled back up his body, your fingers tracing the lines of his muscles, the sensation eliciting a soft moan from him. Hongjoong's hands found their way to your hips, guiding you to the bed. He positioned himself on top of you, his hands gently spreading your legs. His fingers slowly explored your folds,

"You are so wet, so ready for me" he murmured in awe, his fingers brushing over your slick folds. The sensation caused you to gasp. With a sudden surge of impatience, you pulled him closer by his neck, kissing him aggressively.

"Hongjoong, I need you now," you demanded, your voice thick with desire. He positioned himself, ready to give you what you so desperately wanted. But then, he stopped, pulling back slightly and looking into your eyes with a serious expression.

‘’Are you on the pill?" he asked, his voice filled with concern.

"No, not anymore," you admitted, biting your lower lip anxiously.

"Condoms?" he asked, hoping that you had some.

"I don't think I have any," you confessed, your heart pounding in your chest.

"Shit, I think I have some in my wallet," he moved off you and rushed to search his wallet, which was carelessly thrown to the side earlier. After a moment, Hongjoong let out a sigh of relief as he pulled out a condom. Returning to the bed, he positioned himself above you again, his dark eyes filled with desire. You took the condom from him, your hands slightly shaking as you carefully unrolled it down his throbbing length. You guided him to your entrance, the anticipation making you shudder with pleasure. As he slowly entered you, you couldn't help but gasp at the overwhelming sensation, the feeling of him inside you sending waves of pleasure coursing through your body. As Hongjoong began to move, each thrust sending sparks of pleasure shooting through you, your hands found purchase on his shoulders, clinging onto him as if your life depended on it. The rhythm of his movements, slow and deliberate at first, gradually picked up pace, each powerful thrust hitting that sweet spot inside you and drawing moans of pleasure from your lips.

"Hongjoong whatever you do just don't stop now," you moaned, your toes curling in pleasure. His name fell from your lips again in a breathless whisper, the sound of it spurring him on. The room filled with the sounds of your passion, the rhythmic creaking of the bed, and your shared moans and gasps of pleasure.

"You feel so good, baby” he moaned. You felt his dick throbbing inside you, which made you clench around him, making him moan again. As your climax approached, your body tensed, your grip on him tightening. Hongjoong could sense it, and his thrusts became more powerful. "Are you going to cum for me, princess?" he asked, his voice husky with desire. Your body responded to his words before your mind could, a rush of pleasure coursing through your veins. You could do nothing but nod, your body taut with anticipation. Hongjoong’s movements became more deliberate, his rhythm matching your own as the tension built.

"Yes," you breathed out, the word barely escaping your lips before a wave of pleasure washed over you. Your body convulsed, your grip on him tightening as you rode the waves of your orgasm. His name fell from your lips in a breathless moan as you rode out your orgasm, each wave of pleasure more intense than the last. With a final, powerful thrust, Hongjoong groaned, his body tensing as he reached his own peak. Feeling him still buried deep inside you, you could sense the warm sensation of his cum filling the condom. Hongjoong’s head fell to the crook of your neck, his hot breath against your skin as he rode out the waves of his climax. The room fell silent, save for the sound of your labored breaths. He collapsed next to you, took the condom off, and threw it away. Hongjoong pulled you into his arms, and his fingers traced lazy circles on your bare skin, the sensation sending tingles down your spine. You turned to face him, your eyes meeting his. There was a softness in his gaze, a tenderness that you hadn't seen for a long time. It warmed your heart, bringing a gentle smile to your face.

"I was going crazy without you," Hongjoong whispered his words a fervent declaration of the depth of his longing. "I missed you every single day," he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper as you gazed into his eyes, losing yourself in the depths of his gaze.

"You wouldn't let me forget about you," you smiled sadly, "ATEEZ were everywhere." You chuckled, the sound tinged with a hint of melancholy. "Every time I started to get a bit better, you would show up on a TV or the internet."

Hongjoong gave a bitter-sweet laugh, "I guess we're inescapable, huh?" His hand moved from your waist to cradle your face.

"I was so proud of you, Hongjoong," you confessed, your voice choked with emotion. "It just hurt that you needed to leave me to do all these amazing things."

His gaze softened at your words, his thumb gently brushing away the tears welling up in your eyes. "I didn't want to," he admitted quietly, his voice hauntingly sincere.

"Will you stay for tonight?" you asked him, your voice quiet and hopeful. A silence hung in the air between you, heavy with the weight of unspoken words and raw emotions. Hongjoong looked at you, his gaze soft and contemplative. It felt like an eternity before he finally responded.

"I wish I could," he murmured, his voice heavy with regret. "But I have to go back. There are things I need to take care of." A pang of disappointment shot through you at his words, but you understood. His world was unforgiving, with schedules and commitments that left little room for personal desires. You knew that asking him to stay was selfish, but some of you couldn't help but wish for a little more time together.

"I understand," you replied, your voice tinged with sadness. "But promise me this won't be the last time we see each other. Promise me you'll come back."

"I promise," he whispered, his voice filled with sincerity. "I'll come back as soon as I can." You nodded, a small smile tugging at the corners of your lips despite the tears that threatened to fall. Hongjoong planted one last kiss on your lips, before gently untangling himself from your embrace. He rose from the bed, his eyes scanning the room for his scattered clothing. You pulled a comforter from the bed around your naked body as you got up from the bed, and you walked up behind him, wrapping your arms around his torso.

"Stay over," you tried convincing him again. "I don't want to be alone." Your lips found the back of his neck, peppering soft kisses there. Each kiss was a silent plea, a yearning for him to stay. He shivered under your touch, goosebumps erupting on his skin. You knew he loved it when you kissed his neck like that. His eyes closed and a soft sigh escaped his lips, a clear sign that he was fighting the urge to stay with you. With one hand, you pulled him in closer, his back pressed against your chest. Your other hand traveled down his torso, exploring his body. You slid your hand lower, until you grabbed his cock, causing Hongjoong to let out a whimper at the sudden contact. The sound was music to your ears, a testament to the effect you had on him. This moment felt right, a perfect blend of desire and intimacy that only you two could share. As you started to pump him slowly, his cock hardened again. Kissing all over his neck, Hongjoong trembled under your touch. Your touch was gentle, yet firm, as you slowly worked him back to full erection. His reactions were immediate and intense, his body trembling under your hands. Hongjoong’s breath hitched in his throat, a soft gasp escaping his lips as you trailed kisses up and down his neck. Every touch, every kiss, seemed to set his nerves on fire, his body humming with pent-up desire.

"Feeling your dick get hard in my hand is so hot," you whispered into his ear. Hongjoong’s breath hitched at your words, he was completely at your mercy, his eyes fluttering closed as he lost himself in the sensations you were coaxing from him. His hands reached for you, his fingers digging into your arm as a silent plea for more. His breaths came in short, ragged gasps, each one a testament to the pleasure you were bringing him. The room was filled with the sound of your soft murmurs and his gasps, the air heavy with desire. You took your time, savoring each reaction, each tremor that ran through him.

"I'm going to make you come so hard," you breathed against his neck, your voice filled with a promise of the pleasure to come. A shiver ran through his body at your words, anticipation causing his breath to hitch in his throat. The kisses you trailed along his neck grew more passionate, more desperate, each one a promise of the pleasure to come. He was trembling beneath your touch, his body writhing with anticipation, ready for the climax that was sure to come.

"Need... need to feel your mouth on me. Please, please," he moaned as you sped up your movements on his length. You could feel his desperation in every word, the primal need making his voice tremble. You turned his body to face you, without missing a beat, you moved down his body, trailing kisses along the way. You took him in your mouth, your movements slow and deliberate at first, earning a guttural moan from him. His hand found its way to your hair, fingers tangling in the locks as he guided your movements. With every moan, every gasp for breath, you could feel him lose himself in the pleasure you were giving him. It only spurred you on further, your movements becoming more confident, more insistent. Hongjoong was a moaning mess, his body tensing as he felt the precipice of his release approaching.

"God... F-fuck," he stuttered, the words tumbling out amidst irregular breaths. He looked at you, his eyes dark with desire and pleading. "Baby, I love you... Can I... Can I cum in your mouth?" your eyes met his, a soft nod of consent given as you continued your movements. The quiet room was filled with only the sounds of his heavy breaths and soft curses. Your name fell from his lips like a prayer, his hands gripping your hair tightly. "I love you... I love you so much," he gasped out, his body trembling as he reached his climax. His cum filled your mouth, the taste of him intoxicating and familiar. You swallowed it all, a sense of pride swelling within you. As his release washed over him, you could see the love and adoration in his eyes. He was open, vulnerable, and completely yours at that moment. Post-orgasmic bliss took over him, his body going limp as he tried to regain his breath. You crawled up, placing soft kisses along his chest, his jaw, his lips. Hongjoong pulled you closer, his arms wrapping around you tightly.

"I love you too, Hongjoong," you whispered, your head resting on his chest. His heart was still racing, the rhythm syncing with your own. You could feel his fingers tracing patterns on your back, a content sigh escaping his lips. He didn't say anything, but he didn't need to. The look in his eyes said it all. He was in love, and so were you. Despite the challenges and the heartache, you belonged together. And in that moment, everything felt right. For a moment, he allowed himself to enjoy your embrace, his mind lost in the warmth of your touch.

"So, did that earn me your stay?" you asked playfully, a hint of mischief in your eyes as you looked up at him. Hongjoong kissed your forehead, before gently pulling away from your embrace, his fingers brushing against your cheek as he looked at you with regret-filled eyes.

"Baby I really wish I could stay, but I can't," he murmured, his voice heavy with regret. "I have early rehearsals tomorrow. I promise I'll come back soon." He gently extricated himself from your grasp and began to get dressed.

"Don't go," you pleaded softly, your voice barely a whisper. But despite the plea in your eyes, he knew he couldn't stay. No matter how much he wanted to remain by your side, his responsibilities were calling him back.

"I don't want to leave you," Hongjoong murmured in a tone that was barely a whisper, his eyes filled with regret. "But I have to. I have responsibilities that I need to attend to." Despite the warmth of your bodies pressed together and the lingering taste of you on his lips, he knew he couldn't stay. He gave you one last look, his heart aching at the sight of your disheveled hair and the love in your eyes. The silence in the room was heavy, filled with unspoken words and lingering emotions. Once fully dressed, he turned back to you, his gaze soft. He walked over and pulled you into a gentle hug, his hand stroking your hair in a comforting gesture.

"I'll see you soon, I promise," he whispered into your ear before pulling away. Hongjoong gave you one last lingering look, his eyes filled with longing before he opened the door and stepped out of your apartment, leaving you alone with your thoughts.

However, Hongjoong did not keep his promise.

four

Once again, days turned into weeks, and Hongjoong was nowhere to be found. You started to believe that your meeting was only a dream, a figment of your imagination borne out of desperation and longing. Each passing day without any word from him further reinforced this belief. The emptiness that you had once managed to keep at bay was slowly creeping back in, consuming you bit by bit. The silence was deafening, a harsh reminder of the reality you were trying to escape from. It felt as if you were trapped in a never-ending cycle of hope and despair, each passing day a test of your resilience and strength. With each passing day, a seed of doubt began to grow within you. Was it possible that Hongjoong regretted what had happened? Could it be that the promises whispered in the heat of the moment, the tender kisses and reassuring words, were nothing more than a mistake? The thought gnawed at you, casting a dark shadow over the glimmer of hope you had been clinging on to. You found yourself questioning everything, your mind a whirlpool of confusion and despair. Your days were filled with uncertainty and your nights were haunted by dreams of him. You longed for the comfort of his presence, aching for the familiarity of his touch. Yet, all you were left with was the deafening silence, a cruel reminder of the distance that had grown between you.

Three weeks had passed since you last laid eyes on Hongjoong, and the absence was fucking with your head. Questions spun around in your head like a whirlwind, each one piercing deeper than the last. Was it only the sex that he missed? You were haunted by the warmth of his touch and the intoxicating way he used to look at you. The ghost of his touch still lingered on your skin, a cruel reminder of the intimacy that once existed. The silence of your phone was deafening, the man who once couldn't go a day without hearing your voice, who used to fill your inbox with loving messages, had now been reduced to radio silence. Your mind was a battlefield, memories of him clashing violently with the present reality. This was not the Hongjoong you loved and cherished, the one who held you through the darkest nights and lit up your world with his smile. This was a stranger, a phantom wearing Hongjoong's face and carrying his memories, a cruel mockery of the man you once knew.

five

On a sunny afternoon, you came back from grocery shopping and approached your apartment complex. Upon reaching your floor, you found Hongjoong leaning against your door. The sight of him waiting there, a look of nervous anticipation on his face, sent a jolt of surprise through you. The sound of grocery bags dropping onto the floor startled Hongjoong, his head snapping up to see you standing there, a look of shock and anger on your face. He quickly jogged over to help you pick up the scattered items, but you recoiled, pulling the bags away from him.

"Why are you here, Hongjoong?" You spat out his name like it was poison. "I don't want to see you," you quickly got up as you finished picking up what was left from your shopping.

"We both know you don’t mean it…" Hongjoong blurts out, a look of guilt crossing his face.

"My manager found out I came to see you," Hongjoong admitted, avoiding your gaze. "The company... they're not happy. They made me sign a contract." His voice was barely a whisper, but the words hit you with the force of a freight train. "I'm... I'm banned from dating now." His words hung heavily in the air, the final blow to the fairytale you had tried so hard to keep alive. The revelation left you speechless, your heart aching at the harsh reality of his words. You felt a cold wave of disappointment wash over you, the realization of Hongjoong's predicament hitting you like a punch to the gut.

"Banned from dating?" you echoed, the words sounding foreign on your tongue. As the weight of Hongjoong's confession settled over you, you couldn't help but feel a sense of betrayal. It wasn't just the fact that he was banned from dating that stung, but the realization that he had chosen to prioritize his career over your relationship once again. "How could you?" you whispered, your voice barely audible above the pounding of your heart. "After what happened that night, you still chose them over me?" The hurt and anger bubbled up inside you, threatening to spill over at any moment. You felt like a fool for ever believing that things could be different, for allowing yourself to hope for a future that was never meant to be.

Hongjoong reached out to you, his hand hovering in the air as if unsure whether to touch you. "I didn't have a choice, Y/N," he pleaded, his voice filled with desperation. "You have to believe me. I didn't want this to happen." But his words fell on deaf ears.

"You always have a choice, Hongjoong," you retorted, your voice laced with bitterness. "You chose to sign that contract!" The tears welled up in your eyes, threatening to spill over at any moment. "You promised you would be back to see me, Hongjoong! You said you missed me and you wanted to make this right. And now this?" you exclaimed, your voice shaking with the intensity of your emotions. The betrayal cut deep, his broken promises like salt in the wound.

"You can't just show up here after weeks of silence and expect me to be okay with this," you continued, your voice raw with emotion. "You've made your choice, Hongjoong. Now, I'm making mine. I can't do this anymore."

Your words hung heavily in the air, the finality of them echoing in the silence that enveloped the two of you. Hongjoong was left standing there, a stunned expression on his face as he processed your words. The man who was once your world, who held your heart in his hands, was now a stranger standing before you.

"I... I didn't mean to hurt you," he whispered, his voice barely audible. His eyes were brimming with regret, the weight of his actions visibly weighing on him.

"But you did, Hongjoong," you replied, your voice steady despite the tears that threatened to spill. "You hurt me... and the worst part is, you chose to. You chose them over me... again."

The silence that followed was deafening, the tension palpable. Hongjoong looked as if he wanted to say something, to defend himself or perhaps apologize, but no words came out. It was as if he finally realized the gravity of his actions, the damage that he had caused.

You turned your back on him, the sight of him too painful to bear. The man you loved was no more, replaced by a stranger who wore his face and held his memories. As you walked away, you could feel his gaze on you, heavy with regret and longing. But it was too late. The damage had been done, and there was no turning back.

You walked into your apartment, closing the door behind you. The finality of the sound echoing in the silent hallway. As you leaned against the door, your knees gave out, sending you sliding down to the floor. Sobs racked your body, the tears flowing freely now. Suddenly, there was a knock on the door. You froze, your heart pounding in your chest.

"Y/N, please," Hongjoong's voice filtered through the door, his tone desperate. "I love you, please let me in." But you couldn't bring yourself to open the door, to face him again. His words, once so comforting, now felt like a cruel mockery of what you once shared. You wrapped your arms around yourself as if to ward off the chill that had seeped into your bones.

"I can't, Hongjoong," you whispered, your voice barely audible. The silence that ensued was deafening, only broken by the occasional sob that escaped your lips. You could hear Hongjoong's muffled pleas on the other side of the door,

"Baby, I need you to understand," he began, his voice steady despite the emotions that threatened to overwhelm him. "I love you. In this world, it's always been you. Without you, I feel so alone. I need you to really hear me when I say that I love you." he murmured, his voice filled with so much pain that it made your heart ache.

Your cry spasmed through your body, causing you to shiver uncontrollably. Between gasps for air, you managed to sob out, "I love you too." Hongjoong’s voice fell silent on the other side of the door, and you clung to the silence, hoping, praying that he had left. But then you heard it, a low, heartbreaking sob from the other side.

"I'm so sorry, Y/N," Hongjoong's voice was barely more than a whisper, choked with emotion. "I'm sorry for everything." You clung to the cold, hard floor, your body wracked with sobs. The apartment felt emptier than ever, the silence echoing through the space, a stark reminder of your loneliness.

"Please let me in," he tried begging again, his voice echoing through the silence. But you couldn't. You were too hurt, too betrayed. You curled up tighter on the cold floor, your heart aching as his pleas continued to echo through the small apartment.

"I...I need to go," Hongjoong finally whispered, his voice heavy with sorrow. You heard his footsteps recede and the faint sound of the hallway door closing. You were finally alone, the silence in the apartment a stark reminder of the void he had left behind. In the silence of your apartment, you allowed yourself to break down completely. Your sobs echoed through the empty space, your heartache manifesting in the tears that streamed down your face. You felt the loss of him deeply like a part of you had been ripped away.

six

You had lost track of how much time had passed since you last saw Hongjoong. The days blurred into weeks, and the weeks blurred into months. Morning turned into night, and night turned back into morning, but the ache in your heart remained constant. Hongjoong’s absence was like a gaping wound that refused to heal. You found yourself going through the motions of life, putting on a brave face during the day while falling apart in the solitude of the night. Every little thing reminded you of him - a certain song on the radio, the scent of his favorite cologne lingering in the air, the way the morning sunlight streamed through the window just the way he liked it. You knew it was wrong, that you needed to move on, but it was easier said than done. The memories of him were etched deep within your heart, a part of you that you couldn’t just erase. You missed his laughter, his touch, the way he used to look at you. You missed him, and it hurt more than you ever thought possible. Try as you might, you were coping really badly without him. His absence had left a void in your life that you didn't know how to fill. You felt lost, adrift in a sea of loneliness. You yearned for his presence, for the comfort and familiarity that he brought into your life. Despite the heartache and the pain, you were holding on. Holding on to the hope that, maybe, with time, the pain would lessen. Holding on to the memories that brought you joy in your darkest moments. Holding on to the love that, despite everything, still lingered within your heart.

You started to go clubbing, drinking more alcohol than you should, each shot you took was a desperate attempt to erase him from your mind, to numb the pain that was threatening to consume you. You tried to lose yourself in the rhythm, in the mindless chatter and laughter around you, but all you could think about was Hongjoong. Alcohol, which was supposed to help you forget, ironically made him even more present. His name was etched on every bottle, his memory swirled in every glass, his phantom touch felt in every drunken stupor. Each night was a replay of all the moments you shared, every word exchanged, every secret whispered, every promise made.

The club was packed, the music pounding in time with your heartbeat. The smell of alcohol and sweat filled the air, mingling with the intoxicating scent of perfume. Lost in the crowd, you tried to drown out the loneliness that gnawed at your insides. Suddenly, you felt a presence beside you. Turning, you found yourself face to face with a stranger. He was handsome, with a warm smile and dark, inviting eyes. He offered to buy you a drink, his voice barely audible over the loud music. You nodded, accepting the drink he handed you. The alcohol burned your throat, but it was a welcome distraction from the emptiness you felt. As the night progressed, the stranger became more comfortable. He leaned in closer, his hand brushing against yours. His touch sent a jolt through your body, a feeling of excitement... and something else. Something that felt like a betrayal. The stranger leaned in for a kiss, his lips barely inches from yours. You wanted to respond, to surrender to the desire that was churning within you. But as his lips meet yours, a flash of Hongjoong's face appears in your mind. It was as if a bucket of cold water had been dumped on you. Suddenly, the stranger's touch felt wrong, his presence a stark reminder of what you were missing. With a gasp, you pulled away, pushing the stranger off you. You stumbled back, your heart pounding in your chest. You turned and ran, pushing through the crowd, desperate to escape. The stranger called after you, but his voice was drowned out by the thumping music. Once outside, you leaned against the wall, gasping for breath. Tears welled up in your eyes as you realized the truth. Despite the desire to move on, to forget Hongjoong, your body seemed to have a mind of its own. You still craved his touch, his presence. It felt like your body was still his, refusing to let go, refusing to be with anyone else. It was a painful realization, a glaring reminder of the void that Hongjoong had left in your life. Staggering back to your apartment, you felt more alone than ever.

After what felt like forever, you reached your apartment complex. Stumbling through the doorway, you barely had the strength to close the door behind you. Your thoughts were a blur, the world spinning around you as the effects of the alcohol finally started to take a toll. You leaned against the wall for support, the cold surface offering a stark contrast to the warmth that was spreading through your body. A bitter laugh escaped your lips as you slid down the wall, your body finally giving in to the exhaustion. You sat there, alone in the darkness, the silence of your apartment echoing the emptiness you felt inside. You pulled out your phone, your fingers hovering over Hongjoong's name. Without any hesitation, feeling like you had already waited too long, you pressed the call button. The phone rang, but there was no answer. A pang of disappointment hit you, though it was an outcome you weren't entirely surprised by. You sighed, waiting for the beep before leaving a voicemail.

"Hongjoong, it's me," you began, your voice slightly shaky. "I was out clubbing, and there was this guy… We kissed and… and he wanted to take me home. But I couldn't... I couldn't because it felt like I would be cheating on you. And that just... it made me feel sick." There was a pause as you braced yourself, gathering your thoughts. "The worst thing is," you continued, your voice slightly choked, "that I would still welcome you with open arms. I miss our life together, Hongjoong. I miss you." There was another pause, a heavy silence filling the line. "I'm so sorry," you said, your voice barely a whisper. "I'm so sorry for making you feel bad about choosing your career. I know how much you wanted what you have now. And I... I shouldn't have held you back." You took a deep breath, your heart pounding in your chest as you grappled with the words you knew you had to say. "And Hongjoong," you added, your voice filled with a quiet intensity, "I will never not love you." With that, you ended the call, the silence that followed echoing with the weight of your words.

In a haze, you managed to make your way to your bed, your body sinking into the familiar comfort of the mattress. The silence in the room felt overwhelming, and your mind filled with thoughts of Hongjoong. You missed him terribly, the uncertainty of his whereabouts gnawing at you. Pulling out your phone, you started to text him, your fingers clumsily typing out the words.

"Hongjoong... I miss you. I don't know where you are... and it's driving me crazy," you typed, the words blurring on the screen as tears welled up in your eyes. You hit send, the message disappears into the ether. Tears trickled down your cheeks, the emptiness of the room amplifying the loneliness you felt. You cried a deep, aching sob that echoed in the silence of the room, your body shaking with the intensity of your feelings. The room was dark, the only light coming from the screen of your phone, you picked it up and started typing another message.

"Hongjoong, I miss you."

"I need you, Hongjoong."

As you sent the message, a wave of regret washed over you. You knew you shouldn't have sent it, but the alcohol in your system and the loneliness in your heart had made you reckless.

"I still love you."

"I love you so much it hurts."

"I wish I wasn’t hurting this bad."

You dropped your phone on the bed, the screen illuminating the darkness as your messages were sent into the void, unanswered.

"I wish things were different."

The truth of your words hit you like a sledgehammer, and you broke down again, sobs shaking your body as you curled up on your bed. You cried until you fell asleep, your dreams filled with memories of Hongjoong.

seven

The crowd roared with applause as Hongjoong left the stage, his heart pounding in his chest. The energy from the audience was infectious, their cheers and screams echoing in his ears long after the music had stopped. The final show of the tour had been a resounding success, each seat filled, each ticket sold. As he walked off the stage, the reality of their success began to sink in. The bright lights, the screaming fans, the sold-out venues - it was more than he had ever dreamed of. Despite the fatigue that was beginning to set in, he couldn't help but bask in the afterglow of their performance. The excitement, the adrenaline, the sheer joy of performing - it was a feeling like no other. After all was said and done, he found himself walking through the corridors, personally thanking each member of the crew. Their faces lit up at his words of gratitude, their hard work acknowledged by their leader. The atmosphere was filled with camaraderie and mutual respect, a testament to the bond they shared. Once he had made his rounds, he finally reached his sanctuary - his dressing room. The room was dimly lit, the quiet hum of the air conditioning the only sound breaking the silence. Rows of neatly hung suits, shirts, and accessories greeted him, a stark contrast to the chaos that had ensued earlier. Exhaustion washed over him like a tidal wave, the adrenaline that had been fueling him all day finally starting to wane. His body felt heavy, his mind cloudy from the day's events. He moved towards the plush leather couch sitting in the corner of the room, his legs giving way as he sank into the soft cushions. The quietness of the room enveloped him, a soothing balm to his frayed nerves. He let out a sigh of relief, his body sinking further into the couch as he allowed the exhaustion to take over. The day had been long and arduous, but he had made it through, and for that, he was grateful. Hongjoong reached out and picked up his phone from the bedside table. The bright screen lit up, and his heart skipped a beat as he saw your name at the top of his notifications. Hongjoong's heart pounded in his chest as he played the voice message. Your voice, which he hadn’t heard in so long, laced with alcohol and desperation, echoed in his brain. His breath hitched at your confession, the image of another man touching you burning in his mind. It was a torment he hadn't prepared for, a reality he refused to accept. His grip on his phone tightened, his knuckles turning white as your words washed over him. Each syllable was like a dagger to his heart, the pain raw and unbearable. As the full weight of your words sunk in, he was left reeling, the reality of your pain and longing hitting him like a punch to the gut. He had never felt more helpless, more desperate. After hearing the voice message, he quickly clicked on the text notifications. His fingers trembled slightly as he read the messages:

my love: "Hongjoong... I misssss youuuu. Don't knoowww whereeee u r... it's drivin' me craaaazy."

my love: "Honjoong, I missss youuuu.”

my love: "I neeedd yoooo, Hongjoongg.”

my love: "I stiilll lovvee yooouu.”

my love: "I wishhh thinggs werre differrrent.”

my love: "I luvv yu sooo muchh it hurttss."

my love: "I wishh I wasn't hurtin' thiss badd."

In a heartbeat, Hongjoong got up from the sofa, the quick motion caused his head to spin. Shaking off the disorientation, he lunged for his bag, hastily gathering his belongings in a flurry of swift movements. All his thoughts were consumed by one singular goal - he needed to see you. Not bothering with changing out of his stage attire into something more casual, he embraced the urgency of the moment, allowing it to fuel his actions. He shrugged on his jacket, barely noticing the lingering sweat on his skin or the way his stage clothes clung to his body. Hongjoong’s heart pounded in his chest, as he sprinted out of the dressing room. His eyes darted around the bustling backstage area, scanning the familiar faces and chaotic scenery in search of one person. His manager. Every second was critical, each fleeting moment amplifying the urgency of his need to see you. The world around him seemed to blur into a whirlwind of colours and sounds as he navigated through the backstage chaos, his mind solely focused on his mission.

"Hongjoong, are you alright?" Minah, the stylist, asked as she approached him cautiously. She had been observing him from a distance, noting the far-off look in his eyes. It was unlike him to be this distracted, especially when they were on a tight schedule. Hongjoong didn't even notice her until she was right next to him, her voice cutting through the fog of his thoughts. He blinked, turning to look at her with a slightly startled expression.

"Where is my manager?" he asked, his voice tense. It wasn't like him to be so curt, and Minah knew instantly that something was off. She glanced warily at him, biting her lower lip anxiously.

"He stepped out for a moment, he should be back soon," she replied, trying to keep her voice steady. She had been working with Hongjoong for a while now and she had never seen him this agitated before. Hongjoong nodded, his gaze wandering off again as he started scanning the room left and right. He looked like a man on edge, his eyes darting around the room as if searching for an escape route. His hands were clenched tightly in his lap, his knuckles turning white from the pressure. Minah watched him with growing concern, her mind racing as she tried to think of a way to help. She had seen him tired, stressed, even overwhelmed at times, but she had never seen him like this. He looked like he was at his breaking point, like he was about to shatter into a million pieces. She knew better than to press him for answers, knowing that he would open up when he was ready. But as the minutes ticked by and his anxiety seemed to mount, she couldn't help but worry. Something was clearly wrong, and she felt helpless as she watched him struggle.

"Fuck it," he cursed under his breath, his thoughts racing as he rushed towards the back doors that led to the underground parking lot. Hongjoong made his way through, heading straight for the exit. At that moment, the possible consequences of his actions didn't matter to him. Just as he was about to pry open the alarmed doors, causing the alarm to ring out, he heard someone calling his name.

"Hongjoong, what do you think you're doing?" It was his manager, jogging over to him.

"I'm going back home," Hongjoong declared, his voice ringing with a determination that startled his manager. The manager, taken aback by the sudden change in his typically professional demeanor, quickly tried to regain control of the situation. He grabbed Hongjoong by the shoulder, attempting to steer him back towards the conference room where a team of publicists and stylists awaited their return.

"You aren't going anywhere, Hongjoong," his manager sternly replied, his grip tightening on Hongjoong's shoulder. "We're flying back in two days after the interviews. You know the schedule." Typically, Hongjoong was a stickler for professionalism. He understood the importance of maintaining a certain image, of fulfilling his responsibilities and keeping to the schedule. But this was not a typical situation. His mind was filled with thoughts of you, your voice in that message echoing in his ears. The sound of your soft sobs, the barely concealed panic in your voice - they haunted him. He needed to be with you, to hold you, to reassure you that everything was going to be okay.

With a firm shake of his shoulder, he freed himself from his manager's grasp, his movements abrupt and filled with a newfound, desperate energy.

"Seonghwa will take the leader role when I'm gone," he declared, his voice louder than it had been all night. "You will figure something out," he continued, his voice echoing with a resolve that hadn't been there before. Hongjoong gaze was intense, almost desperate, as he looked at his manager, it was a look they had never seen before, a look that spoke of desperation and determination that was both terrifying and heartbreaking. "Give me the keys to the car," Hongjoong demanded, his voice icily calm in contrast to the furious glint in his eyes. But his manager defied him, refusing to hand over the keys. Hongjoong was on a rampage, his usual composed demeanor replaced with a fiery rage that was starting to consume him. His vision blurred, the edges tinged with red as his frustration escalated."I NEED to go!" Hongjoong shouted, his voice filled with an urgency that cut through the tense silence.

"You're not thinking straight, Hongjoong," his manager retorted, his tone laced with frustration and concern. "You can't just abandon everything and run off. Think about the consequences!"

"I don't care about the consequences!" Hongjoong snapped, his patience wearing thin. "This is more important!"

"Oh, is it?" his manager sneered, a manipulative glint in his eyes. "Remember, Hongjoong, I can ruin you. I can leak your little secret to the press. Imagine the scandal, the headlines... ''ATEEZ's leader, Kim Hongjoong, abandons tour to chase after ex-girlfriend.'' How do you think the fans will react?" Hongjoong knew it was a threat, a blatant attempt to control him, but the reality of the situation was that his manager held the power to destroy his career.

Hongjoong's heart pounded in his chest, his blood running cold at his manager's words. He gritted his teeth as he cut off his manager's words.

"How do you know it's about her?" he demanded, his voice harsh. A cold dread washed over him as he considered the implications. How was it even possible for his manager to know you had contacted him? After all these months of radio silence, how could he possibly know? His manager shrugged, an unreadable expression on his face.

"I have my ways," he said cryptically. "Besides, it's not like I don't know what she still means to you." The words stung, a harsh reminder of the heartache Hongjoong had been trying to bury. "Don't tell me I didn't warn you," his manager said smugly, dangling the car keys in front of him. With a sigh, Hongjoong snatched the keys from his hand, his determination unwavering. He would face the consequences of his actions, whatever they may be, as long as it meant he could be there for you.

For the first time in his life, Hongjoong didn't care about professionalism or the implications of his actions. He didn't care about the shocked expressions of his manager and the other staff members. He didn't care about the potential backlash or the consequences he might face. This time, all he cared about was you.

#ateez x reader #ateez angst #ateez au #ateez fanfic #hongjoong x reader #hongjoong angst #hongjoong smut #ateez x y/n #hongjoong x y/n #hongjoong x you

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mypoisonedvine · 1 year

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emmet or bearded cillian who is dads best friend but is also a mechanic or something and he fixes your car and u thought it would be free but he wants a specific form of payment IF U CATCH MY DRIFT and everything is dirty and grimmy and maybe against the side of the car or inside whatever you like

i love your writing so so much im yelling any time you post something new, have a good day <3

THIS IS SO EMMETT CODED OMFG IT'S PERFECT

length: 1.7k

warnings: SMUT (18+ only!!), unspecified age gap (but everybody is an adult), semi-public sex, oral f receiving, creampie

"Well, I think she'll live," he announced with a laugh as he stood up, wiping oil-covered hands on a rag. "Just needs a new spark plug and probably a patch on the fluid exchange."

You chewed your lip as you pretended not to be a total idiot about cars. "How much is that gonna put me out for?"

He waved his hand dismissively. "Don't worry about that too much, honey. Your dad's a good friend, we'll just call it even."

"No, Em," you sighed, stepping closer to him-- having to walk carefully so you wouldn't trip on any toolboxes left out on the garage floor. "Come on, let me at least pay for the parts or something."

He shook his head, giving you one of those smiles that melted your heart just a bit. "You've been too good to me already, sweetheart. Don't worry about me."

You felt a little awkward, realizing he was referring to how you'd helped him after his ex-wife moved out. There wasn't much you could do, of course, but you'd tried to show your support-- first by bringing some food over, first a casserole and then allegedly 'extra' cookies, even though you were a little worried he'd be offended by the possible suggestion that he couldn't cook for himself. Then, you'd given him advice on how to keep the zinnias out front alive, since their normal caretaker was too busy running away to California with her hairdresser to water them. He seemed to appreciate that, and your heart might have skipped a beat when your hands brushed against his while you were gardening together.

(Um, it was a male hairdresser, by the way. Not that it matters a whole lot...)

Maybe you would let him give you free work on your car, if you didn't happen to know that the auto shop was struggling at the moment. Sure, you figured he'd give you a deal, because that was just who he was, but you never expected to take his time and spare parts for nothing in return. "Em, please," you frowned, leaning against the hood of your car just after he'd shut it. "Let me make it up to you-- you're working so hard for me."

As his eyes fell on you, you suddenly noticed a new darkness in them; he was looking you up and down, making you shudder slightly as he leaned closer. "Jus' tryin' to take care of you, honey," he said, a little softer, and you fought the urge to bite your lip. "Can't let you drive around town in somethin' that might break down any minute."

"Well, I can't let you eat TV dinners every night," you smiled in reply. "How about I pay you back in meals, hm? You liked the chicken casserole, right?"

"Yeah, you're a good cook," he relented, "I guess I can't turn down an offer like that, can I?"

"Good," you grinned, "then I'll bring something over tonight."

"But what if I'm hungry for somethin' else?"

You got a little shaky all of a sudden, and tried not to get your hopes up-- you were probably imagining the sultry tone to his voice...

"Somethin' a little sweeter than casserole," he added, closing the space between you and lifting your chin so you would look up at him.

"...cookies?" you wondered with a weak voice, and he laughed softly.

"Don't get me wrong," he replied, "your cookies are great. But I think you know that's not what I'm talkin' about."

You didn't know how to respond to that... you weren't even sure if you supposed to respond. Apparently, he got whatever he needed just from looking into your eyes.

"Sit on the hood, honey."

He knelt in front of you as you did what you were told; he kept his eyes locked with yours as long as he could, until he started to spread your legs slowly and his gaze had to dart down under your dress.

"Oh, sweetheart," he sighed heavily, making you struggle not to press your thighs together to satisfy your sudden desire for friction. "Look at those cute little panties-- can I take 'em off for you?"

"Y-yes, please," you nodded, and he gave you a little smile as he reached up under your dress to slowly-- so painfully slowly-- pull them down your thighs.

You opened your legs perhaps a bit too eagerly once he'd slipped the panties off around your shoes and stuffed them into his pocket-- yes, you'd noticed that-- and he bit his lip at the sight, pushing your dress up just enough to get a good view. "Baby," he growled, "you're just too perfect."

You thought maybe he'd ask again, like he had before he took off your panties-- maybe just because he knew you'd say yes. But he didn't: he just dove right in all of a sudden, making you gasp and moan as his tongue and lips explored all over you.

He devoured you with every lap, humming and moaning between those beautifully filthy, wet noises the whole ordeal created.

"P-please," you gasped, running your fingers through his long, wavy hair.

"Oh, honey," he groaned proudly, pulling back slightly to look up at you before delivering a gentle peck to your swollen clit. "You sound too cute when you're beggin'."

Going back in again, he sucked harder on your clit until your thighs instinctively clamped down on his head-- which didn't deter him at all, anyway. "E-Emmett, fuck, just like that--" you choked out, holding tighter to his hair, "oh fuck!"

Groaning encouragingly, he slid his tongue inside you and shut his eyes tight as you started to rock your hips on his face.

He found a pattern pretty quickly, holding you steady by your thighs so he could force every sensation on you; he teased your opening with his tongue, but focused mostly on your clit until you were shaking all over. You kept trying to tell him you were going to come, but it was obvious by how hard you struggled to put a sentence together. When you did come on his tongue, it was quieter than you expected-- a silent scream, which broke into a long, low moan when you were actually able to breathe again.

His tongue on your clit became too much all of a sudden, and your hand in his hair started to push him away. Thankfully, he did stop, and you started to slowly come back to reality.

He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand as he stood up to face you again, starting to open his jeans quickly.

"Fuck, Em," you panted as you tried to catch your breath, blinking the blur out of your eyes to get a better view of his proud, tilted grin. "What'd you do that for?"

"Just needed to hear you scream, princess," he winked, reaching into his boxers. "And I figured I won't last long when I'm inside ya, anyway-- s'been a while..."

He pulled his cock out of his pants, instantly pressing the tip up to you and lining himself with your opening.

"And I like the idea of still being able to smell your pussy in my beard tomorrow," he added, just before he slid inside your waiting channel.

He grunted as he filled you, head falling back with a heavy sigh through his nose. "O-oh," you choked out, grabbing one of his shoulders to stay stable as he started to move.

"God, baby," he purred, "I was right-- fuck, I won't last. Sorry, but I've been waitin' too damn long..."

You wanted to tell him that you didn't care-- that you actually thought it was insanely sexy how affected he was by all this-- but when you opened your mouth, you could only moan desperately. Your previous orgasm had left your insides all sticky and sensitive, every thrust overwhelming you with tension and friction. And thank god for how wet it had made you, too, or you might have had more trouble fitting his generous girth inside you...

"Knew you'd be so good for me," he grunted, "such a good girl-- wanted you for so long, honey."

You whimpered behind a bitten lip, blinking up at him expectantly. "How long?"

He smirked a little, before leaning in to kiss your neck playfully-- teasing your pulse with the very tip of his tongue. "I shouldn't say," he mumbled.

"Please," you gasped, "god, Em-- I gotta know..."

"Before the divorce," was all he'd say, but that was enough to make you quiver inside-- you'd always wondered, hoped, that he shared your interest, but you had spent most of your time pretending you didn't have a crush on him since he was closer to your dad's age and, you know, married. At the time. "She used to get mad at me when she caught me lookin' at you," he admitted with a low chuckle that made chills run up your spine in delight. "She was jealous of how fuckin' pretty you are... how sweet you are... how good you are..."

"Emmett," you whimpered, clinging to him tighter, "Em, please, I'm so close--"

"Fuck, baby, g'na come again?" he taunted with a grin, one of his hands tightening its grip on your waist. "Go ahead, honey, give my cock a nice li'l squeeze, huh?"

"Yes, fuck, yes," you gasped. "Fuck!"

"Not too loud, sweetheart," he warned, "got another mechanic in the other garage-- don't want him hearin' you... don't want anyone hearin' those pretty sounds but me, okay, princess?"

But he found a much more reliable way to shut you up: he kissed you, hard and desperate, and you moaned against his lips as you tasted yourself on his tongue. Your whimpers of his name were almost unintelligible as he kissed you, but he clearly understood them: he fucked you harder, faster, deeper, grunting promises to come inside you and leave you dripping with his come for the rest of the night. You encouraged him as best you could while being totally speechless-- and with a whine, you came around him just before he filled you with a gruff purr of his own.

Sighing, he dropped his head onto your shoulder, running his fingers down your back through your dress to make you shiver in his arms one more time. "Beautiful," he praised under his breath, kissing softly beside your ear. "So beautiful, honey..."

You smiled softly, wrapping your arms around him in a lazy embrace. "You're the one that's too good to me, Em," you whispered. "When did you figure out I had a crush on you?"

"Sometime after you brought me the casserole, but before you came on my face."

#emmett a quiet place x reader #emmett a quiet place smut #cillian murphy x reader #cillian murphy smut

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roosterforme · 11 months

Text

How You Play the Game Part 4 | Rooster x Reader

Summary: Bradley is torn between hoping for more nights with you and calling it quits now. But he feels too good when he's around you. When he takes you on a late night date after the game, he's convinced you have the same mixed up feelings he does. But neither of you can seem to explain it.

Warnings: Swearing, fluff, angst, and smut (18+)

Length: 4700 words

Pairing: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x female reader

Check out my masterlist for more! How You Play the Game masterlist. Banner by @thedroneranger

When Bradley left your hotel room at five in the morning, you were still sound asleep. It took every bit of his willpower to carefully extract himself from the warmth of the bed and your body. The room was dark, but he could still see the outline of your profile as you stirred slightly, and he ran his mustache along your cheek.

The sentiments that flooded his brain and almost escaped his lips were startling, and he rolled slowly away from you, his heart beating a little erratically. He needed to get on the road before the Los Angeles rush hour traffic picked up, but he found himself moving without hurry as he located his keys and wallet.

Why was he doing this? He had two more mornings like this, maybe more if he was lucky. But he should have been doing a better job of keeping his feelings in check. He told himself not to do it, but it was like he had no control at this point, so Bradley walked around the bed and kissed your forehead. "See ya, Ace."

He listened to the sports radio show he normally enjoyed on his drive, but he wasn't really absorbing any of it. Your article and insights were better than this. And when he made it to work, he read your game three article on the New York Times app several times when he had breaks and while he ate lunch. It was no wonder every media outlet wanted to have you writing for them. Your style and like no other, and everyone seemed to see that. Bradley wished your boss acknowledged what an asset you are instead of screaming at you for literally nothing.

Ace: You made it to work on time? Miss you.

"Fuck," he gasped, feeling like someone had hit him in the gut as he stood to throw his trash away after lunch. If he believed this was one sided, it wouldn't have been so bad. If he wasn't getting messages like Miss you as soon as he wasn't with you, he would have probably been dealing with this better.

He knew there were sixteen condoms left. He knew you were as keen to take things to bed as he was. Miss you. But that just didn't seem like all there was, and he already knew there wouldn't be enough time to find out for sure.

Yeah, I made it on time. I miss you too. I'll be back up as soon as I get out of work.

This was going to hurt pretty soon. He should be planning to head back to Anaheim tonight to end things with you. But keeping this entanglement going for the duration of the World Series had been his idea to begin with, and the thought of ending up anywhere except with you when he was falling asleep made him feel uncomfortable.

Ace: My room smells like you again. And I can practically still feel your arm wrapped around me.

And now Bradley was looking at tickets for the game even though it started at five. He would miss the first few innings, but at least he'd be able to get his arm around you again.

--------------------------

Your skin was tingling with anticipation, and no matter what you did, you couldn't distract yourself. Bradley was on his way up from San Diego again. He was fighting through traffic to get to you like you were living in some sort of fairy tale with an expiration date. Like he was the handsome prince and the press box was your tower. You snorted as you sat down with your computer and your stat sheet.

It had barely been half a day since he was tangled up in your hotel room bed with you, keeping you warm and secure with his body pressed to the back of yours. It was so easy to slip into a daydream about him, but just as easily you remembered you'd be leaving for Boston and then probably seven more cities before you made your way back to your apartment in New York for a day off.

You just missed a pitch. Bradley wasn't even here yet and you were having a hard time focusing on the game. Everyone else around you was writing and typing away, but you found yourself missing him too much. Then your phone started to vibrate, and a smile spread across your face.

"Hi Bradley," you whispered when you answered between pitches.

"Ace, Baby." He sounded out of breath as if he was trying to get to you as quickly as he could. Butterflies lifted off in your tummy as he said, "I just bought a ticket from a scalper in the parking lot for a hundred bucks since it's already the fourth inning. But now the security guards are looking at me like I'm highly suspicious."

You had to stifle your laughter as you stood. "Where are you?"

"Almost to the green door. Almost to you."

Without another word, you ended the call and grabbed your lanyard. And when you opened the heavy door and saw him walking so fast he was practically running, your laughter bubbled over.

"Ace," he called out breathlessly. "I had to park so far away." Before you could even respond, he had you in his arms, lifting you off the ground. "Worth it," he murmured as his lips met yours.

You wanted to tell him how much you missed him. You wanted him to know how happy you were that he came all the way back up here to you. He kissed you so well, you wanted to tell him you wouldn't stop thinking about him for a minute. But instead you said, "Let's get you inside before you get kicked out of here."

As he carried you into the press box, you could feel the thudding of his heart beneath your palm. You kissed his cheek a dozen times before he set you down. "You better get to work, Ace. The best articles around aren't going to write themselves."

"I'll have an easier time of it with you here," you told him as he grabbed one of the folding chairs and settled in.

"Really? How so?"

"I'll have someone to fetch me food and tell me I look pretty."

"I mean, you do look pretty. You hungry?" he asked as you tried to decipher how many outs you had missed.

"No," you replied, immediately putting your hand on his thigh to keep him in his seat. You didn't want him going anywhere at the moment.

"Alright," he rasped next to your ear. "I'll just be your cheerleader then. You're doing great, Baby. Keep going. Your article is going to be perfect."

You were smiling as he let his arm settle across your back, and the occasional words of encouragement kept a smile on your face. You laughed when he said something completely ridiculous like, "All the old, fat dudes are so jealous of you," as he gestured to Quincy who was sitting across the aisle glaring at you.

"Maybe he thinks you're pretty," you whispered.

Bradley just scoffed. "Not my type. He doesn't have any blue feathers at all."

And when the Padres scored a run, you could tell he wanted to cheer as he bit his knuckle. "Do you absolutely hate that nobody cheers in the press box?" you asked him with a laugh as you recorded the run.

"I think I'm actually getting used to it now. But I'm annoyed as hell that the Padres are winning. If the Angels can even out the series to 2-2, I'll get to spend more time with you."

You looked at him with what you just knew was a giddy grin. "You're annoyed that your favorite team is winning?" you asked as you ran your fingers along his Padres shirt.

"Yeah. Kind of. I'd rather spend time with you than anything else."

You kissed him softly and then whispered, "Stop being sweet. I'm trying to work here."

"You're not trying very hard."

Then you nipped at his lip before settling back against his arm. You wrote a quick paragraph about the Padres' relief pitcher throwing a temper tantrum while Bradley proofread it for you. And then you started to add your stats into the article during the seventh inning stretch when Bradley went to get you a water bottle. He kissed the back of your neck as he eased himself back down into his folding chair.

"I have an idea," he whispered. "Might be silly."

"What is it?" you murmured as you scrawled down a note for later.

He was quiet for a beat, and when he spoke, he sounded much less self assured than he usually did. "What if we stay here after the game ends and you finish your article early? Then I can take you on a date?"

His fingers had stilled on your back as you processed his words. "I've kind of been tricking myself into thinking all the baseball games and nights back at my hotel were dates," you said softly, unable to look at him. It was really easy to get lonely in your line of work, and if you let yourself dwell on it too long, you started to feel like it would swallow you whole. You couldn't have a pet or even any houseplants, much less a relationship. There was no time leftover for dates or falling in love.

But Bradley was making you feel two very different things at the same time. He made you wish you had time for these feelings that were creeping in. And he also made you certain that you'd never feel them again after you left for Boston, so what was the point? You shouldn't be encouraging this. But then you looked at his face.

"Yes. Those absolutely were dates," he confirmed. "And this is one right now. But we could go the traditional route for a few hours? Mini golf and a diner?"

If you were supposed to say no right now, you weren't sure how to manage it. "Okay."

And then he settled back with a satisfied grin, and his fingers started drawing those delicious shapes on your back once again. You couldn't remember the last time you'd been on an actual date, but you were sure after tonight, this one would be the benchmark.

--------------------------

"You're a sports writer. Golf is a sport. How are you this bad at it?"

"This is mini golf!" you argued. "It's not real golf! And I'm only doing so poorly because you keep touching me."

Bradley was wrapping his arms around you from behind again, trying to help you line up your shot on the seventh hole, but it was such a lost cause. "Just like that. Don't hit it too hard." As soon as he released you, he could tell it was going to be another awful shot. He watched your neon blue ball soar over to the eighth hole. "You know what? Fine, I'll stop touching you, Ace. You go ahead and show me how good you are," he told you as he went to retrieve your ball for probably the tenth time.

When he carried it back over to you, Bradley grinned at your laughter. The two of you were on a rooftop halfway between Anaheim and Los Angeles, and the night air was just starting to cool things off. After the game ended with an Angels victory, you scooted over to sit on Bradley's lap and he watched you work, offering help as you went. You'd finished your article around 9:30 and submitted it to be published, and then you and he had raced out to his Bronco.

You lined up your shot to try again without Bradley's help, and you hit it too hard again, sending it right back to the eighth hole again. "Okay, fine! I'm bad at mini golf!"

He planted his hands on his hips and turned to get the ball again. "You may as well just let me touch you then, yeah?"

"Yes," you replied, bending to set up your shot one more time. "Just touch me. I like it better when you do."

This time Bradley wrapped your hands around the club and covered them with his. "I like it better, too." He kissed your cheek and helped you check your swing with a long fluid motion, and you both watched the ball roll straight as an arrow until it sank into the cup.

"Hole in one!" you said, jumping up and down and thrusting your club up in the air. "I got a hole in one!"

"It was at least half me," Bradley grumbled as he set his red ball down and sank another one. "See? I'm the hole in one master."

"Sure, Bradley," you said sweetly, and he spent a minute kissing the smirk off your face before someone in the group behind you started to clear their throat.

"We're holding people up," he murmured, and then you tucked your fingers into his jeans pocket and led him to collect both balls.

"Help me get another hole in one, and I'll let you get lucky later," you told him as he dipped down to grab the golf balls. You laughed when he promptly dropped both of them and had to recollect them.

Bradley chased you to the next hole and wrapped his arms around you again, chanting, "Come on, come on, I wanna get lucky." When the shot narrowly missed going into the hole, Bradley kissed your neck and whispered, "It's okay. I'm already getting lucky."

By the last hole, you and he had managed to get three more hole in one shots, and you had your arms around his neck and your lips on his. The city skyline was lit up in the background, and the sounds of traffic even this late were permeating the air around you. But Bradley was absorbed in your body pressed to his and your hips beneath his hands.

"I had fun," you said between heated kisses. "You're going to get so lucky."

Bradley laughed as his hands moved to your ass, and he pushed the apprehension from his mind. Why couldn't he find a girl like this in San Diego? Why couldn't you live in San Diego? You were perfect.

"Didn't you mention a diner that's open all night?" you whispered.

"Let's go."

------------------------

"Apparently it's built out of an old train car," Bradley was saying about the diner as he laced his fingers with yours on the drive there. "Supposed to be good."

You didn't care where he was taking you, because you were having the best night you could remember having in so long. You almost forgot you were on assignment. It was hard for you to acknowledge that you were lonely, but now that you had, you weren't sure how to make it better. Everything was temporary. But that didn't dispute the fact that you and Bradley were in the middle of something, and that this was not anything you normally did. You never, ever told anyone else that your favorite team is the Blue Jays. You never allowed anyone to look at your articles before they were published, let alone help you add notes and proofread them. And that wasn't even touching on the physical aspect of things.

"I think that's it," he said, removing his hand from yours to make the turn into the parking lot. You missed his warmth immediately, but your phone was ringing in your pocket anyway.

Bradley glanced at you as you looked at the screen. "It's Greg. My boss. Should be quick," you assured him. When you answered, you didn't have to say more than his name before he started unloading.

"If this thing goes to seven games, we are likely to lose the exclusives in Boston!" he ranted loudly. "I want you on a flight as soon as you can get out of California."

"Understood, Greg," you said, giving Bradley an apologetic look. But his eyes were wide, and the look he was giving you had your insides in knots. He didn't like when Greg yelled. But he just kept on going.

"I'm just trying to head off a disaster, because if one of these fully online platforms snatches up our exclusive, it will be a fucking nightmare! I'm weighing my options here. I may send Winston out to replace you for the remainder of the World Series so you can start heading east sooner."

"No!" you replied quickly before he could expand on that idea. You were looking at Bradley, heart pounding as you asked Greg, "Aren't my articles doing well? You know my baseball related content always does well."

"Your articles are doing great! They always do great! That's why I need you in fucking Boston!"

You pressed your lips together as Bradley let his hand rest on your knee. "Do not send Winston. I'll see this to the end and then head out."

"First flight you can get! And you better hope this only goes six games, because after Boston, you're going international for a few weeks."

Your stomach lurched as he ended the call. "Why does he have to scream at you?" Bradley asked, looking distraught. He was reaching for you and pulling you onto his lap. "Your work is immaculate."

For a split second, you could picture all of the recruitment emails in your inbox. More piled in every day. "It's just how he works. He's this way with everyone."

"I don't like it at all," he whispered as you came to rest on his lap in his vintage Bronco. Bradley made you feel warm and safe. His mustache brushed along your cheek as he added, "If he thinks you're the best person on his roster to go to Boston for another exclusive and then out of the country, then he should be treating you with respect."

"You heard what he said?" you asked, suddenly clinging to his shirt like he was about to be taken away from you.

"Yeah, Ace. He was screaming at you, Baby. I could hear the whole thing."

You wanted to just curl up right here and go to sleep for the night in this dark parking lot with Bradley's body heat and the steady rhythm of his heart against your palm. Because as soon as he left you at your hotel in a few hours and went back to San Diego so he could go to work tomorrow, you knew you'd miss him terribly.

You forced yourself to say, "I'm hungry." You needed to get out of his car and away from his embrace before you started to cry.

"I'm starving," he said with a soft laugh as he popped his door open and let you climb down. As you and he headed across the parking lot, he reached for your hand and said, "Just know that I think you're better than having to deal with a boss who yells like an asshole for no reason."

You swallowed hard as the two of you were led to a cute booth inside the retro diner. Somehow you just knew this place suited Bradley, and now this aesthetic was going to remind you of him forever. When you slid down into the booth, he went to release your hand, presumably to sit across from you. But you shook your head and pulled him in next to you instead.

When the two of you were left alone with some menus, he wrapped his arm around you. "I always thought people who sat next to each other in a booth looked like idiots," you told him with a grin. "But for some reason I just wanted you over here."

He didn't respond verbally, he just kissed your forehead. And then you listened to him ask the waitress which menu items were the best, and he ordered them all. "I'm hungry. You're hungry. We'll try everything," he whispered.

And then you just settled in. He didn't pull his arm away from you as you told him all about your favorite writing assignments in your surprisingly illustrious career for how young you are. And you learned more about him, too. He waited until a plethora of food was delivered to the table around midnight to carefully slip his arm away from you.

"I really like this," you said softly, unsure if he heard you at first. You were only a little embarrassed by the way your voice shook.

"Me too, Ace."

---------------------------

It was one in the morning. Bradley's belly was filled with one of the most delicious meals he'd ever had as he walked you back to your hotel room with his arm draped across your shoulders. When you got to your door, he watched you open up your bag to locate your room key, and his eyes caught on something blue.

"Did you steal the golf ball?" he asked softly, and you looked up at him right away. "Gonna use it to practice in your hotel room?"

But your eyes weren't teasing as you shook your head slightly. "It's my souvenir. From this trip. Something I can take back to New York."

And now Bradley wasn't teasing either. "I wish you could take me back."

You pressed your lips together, and your eyes fluttered close. "Don't, okay? Please."

He took a deep breath and swallowed hard. "Okay."

Without another word, you unlocked the door and walked over to the desk chair and set your bag down. Bradley let the door close behind him as you turned on the lamp. Your skin looked pretty in the soft, orange light as you started to unbutton your blouse. His lips parted as you bared yourself to him, letting your top fall to the floor along with your bra.

He started to stir as he took a step in your direction. You were feeling the same way he was. You didn't want this to end either. You had that golf ball, and Bradley already had his ticket from game one taped up on his mirror. When you met his eyes, he found himself ready to bare his feelings to you.

"Let's fuck," you announced, your fingers on the fly of your jeans. "You wanna?"

He didn't know what to say as he watched you shimmy out of your pants and approach him in just your underwear. "Ace."

You took him by the hand and started to lead him to bed. Then you were yanking his shirt off and working on his pants, but you didn't meet his eyes. And your usual smile was missing. "Let's do this."

"Ace," he repeated, a little softer this time as he gently wrapped his hands around your wrists and stilled your movements. "I don't want to just fuck. I want to do what we've been doing."

You finally met his eyes. "That is what we've been doing. Just fucking."

"No," Bradley replied, pulling your hands away from his body. "That's not it. There's... more."

He watched you cross your arms over your chest, and your voice broke when you said, "No, Bradley, there's not more. Because there can't be more."

You turned your back to him. He waited a beat and then ran his right hand up your arm to your shoulder. When you shivered for him, he whispered, "You react to me. And I react to you. I miss you when I'm at work. I think about you all day long. Maybe you won't acknowledge it out loud, but please, don't say it's just fucking."

You spun around and buried your face against his neck and chest, and he held you tight. "It's not just fucking," you agreed, taking a deep breath. "I'm sorry I said that."

Bradley kissed the top of your head. "You're not the only one who wishes things could be different." He coaxed your chin up with his fingers so you were looking at him. "You're not the only one, Ace."

And then you kissed him, and this time when you tugged Bradley closer to the bed, he went with you. Even if you wouldn't say anything else to him, you were showing him with everything you did. Your hands were soft on his face, and your fingers wound slowly through his hair. Your lips were on his cheeks and his ears and his forehead. And Bradley knew he only had a few more of these perfect minutes with you, but he didn't want the desperation to cloud the sweetness. Not tonight.

"Come here, Baby," he murmured, his hands on your hips as you leaned back against the pillows. But you pulled him closer for more sweet kisses, his hands returning to your face.

"No, you come here," you coaxed, and that pretty smile that he missed was back on your face now.

"Here I am," he replied with a grin as you wrapped your leg around his and tried to push his jeans down with your foot. When you giggled he peppered kisses all over your face. "You want a hand with that?" he asked as you continued to struggle with his pants.

"No, I got it," you whispered, reaching down to push them down, and then he pulled them all the way off. Your hands trailed back up along his body, and now Bradley was the one shivering. "I got it," you repeated, looking up at him.

You stole the golf ball. And you let Bradley help with your articles. And he knew your secrets. His thumb trailed along your cheek, and he couldn't stop grinning. "I'm going to call in sick tomorrow."

"Bradley," you whined as his thumb trailed along your neck. "You said the planes wouldn't fly themselves."

He shrugged and kissed your skin where his thumb had been. "I'll let somebody else worry about it tomorrow. I'd rather spend the day with you. If you'll let me."

"Yes," you agreed immediately. "Stay with me."

He sighed against your skin. That's all he wanted to hear right now. "I will. Do you want me to get one of the sixteen condoms, Baby?" he asked softly.

You just moaned his name and ran your fingers along his abs, and eventually Bradley extracted himself from your hands and went to dig around in your suitcase just like last night. When he stepped out of his underwear, he watched you pull yours off as well. Then you sat up and looked at him, the soft light catching on your features as you curled your legs to the side. And it was so much more than just fucking. And maybe part of Bradley wished it wasn't, because it was going to be too hard to face later.

But when you smiled at him, he crawled across the bed and into your arms. And it was a long time before he put the condom on, focusing on his lips on your body and your words in his ears. Then he went slowly, rocking into you at a tempo he hoped conveyed just how fucking much he cared for you.

Your back was arched, chest pressed to him as he held your hands over your head. You laced your fingers with his, squeezing them as you repeated his name over and over. Bradley's body covered yours as he moved in time with you, and he watched you come undone as you came for him.

"It's so much more, Ace," he rasped, his voice broken as you squeezed him. You nodded as you whined his name louder, and Bradley came, too.

Neither of you moved for a long time as he let his cheek rest on your shoulder while you played with his hair. Not many words were exchanged, but the two of you barely went more than a minute without touching each other in some way. When you returned from the bathroom in his Padres jersey, Bradley wrapped you up in his arms, and you let him.

"You're really staying?" you asked quietly.

He kissed you as you settled in bed next to him. "Yeah, I'm staying. I'm yours all day tomorrow."

"Good."

Neither of you set an alarm, and neither of you said anything else. But once again, Bradley fell into the most comfortable sleep with his arms around you and his lips on the back of your neck.

-------------------------

I don't want them to hurt. I want them to have fun together while they can. Thanks to @mak-32 and @beyondthesefourwalls

PART 5

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lecsainz · 1 year

Note

hiii could i please request an paul aron x reader where he is not so happy with a race Result and the reader cheers him up.

BAD RACE

parings: paul aron x girlfriend!reader

authors note: I loved writing this one! PS: I tried to look at thousands of pictures of him but couldn't come to the conclusion if his eye is blue or brown, so I went with blue 🤷‍♀️

✩. . . masterlist !

Paul Aron had just crossed the finish line of yet another race, and the result was far from what he had hoped for. His frustration was palpable, and he couldn't shake off the disappointment that clouded his features.

Y/N, his ever-supportive partner, knew all too well how he reacted when races didn't go his way. Paul could be moody and grumpy, dwelling on his performance for days on end. But she also knew just how to cheer him up.

As Paul and his teammate Dino made their way back to the Prema garage, Y/N was waiting for him. She was surrounded by a few mechanics who offered her friendly smiles, aware of her role in boosting Paul's spirits after a tough race.

Paul walked alongside Dino, his head hanging low, lost in thought. Y/N watched them approach, her heart aching for her boyfriend's obvious disappointment.

"Hey, champ," she greeted him with a warm smile as he finally reached her.

Paul managed a weak smile in return, but the disappointment still lingered in his eyes. "Hey," he replied, his voice heavy with the weight of his performance.

Y/N didn't waste any time. She stepped closer to him and wrapped her arms around his waist, pulling him into a tight embrace. "I know it wasn't the race you wanted, but you'll bounce back," she reassured him, her voice filled with unwavering confidence in him.

He sighed and buried his face in her hair, inhaling her comforting scent. "I just messed up, Y/N. I had a shot, and I blew it."

Y/N leaned back slightly, cupping his face in her hands so that their eyes met. "You're not defined by one race, Paul. Remember all the victories you've had. This is just a bump in the road. You'll come back stronger."

Paul's blue eyes searched hers for a moment, and he found solace in her unwavering support. He leaned in and kissed her, a silent thank you for always being there for him. Paul's lips met Y/N's in a heartfelt kiss, their connection speaking volumes even without words. It was a kiss filled with gratitude, love, and a promise that they'd tackle whatever challenges came their way together.

Breaking the kiss, Y/N flashed him a mischievous smile, her eyes sparkling with mischief. "You know, Paul, I've been thinking."

He raised an eyebrow, his interest piqued. "About what?"

She shrugged playfully, her fingers tracing a pattern on his chest. "Well, I hear that some racers have lucky charms or rituals they do before a race to ensure good luck."

Paul's lips curled into a grin as he caught on to her idea. "Are you suggesting I need a lucky charm, Y/N?"

She leaned in, her lips brushing against his ear as she whispered, "I'm suggesting I could be your lucky charm."

His heart raced at her words, her suggestion making him forget about the disappointment of the race. "I like the sound of that," he admitted, his voice husky with desire.

Y/N chuckled softly, a teasing glint in her eyes. "Great. Now, we just need to figure out what kind of good luck charm activities we should engage in."

Paul's hands found their way to her waist, pulling her even closer. "I think I have a few ideas."

Their playful banter was interrupted by the cheerful voice of one of the mechanics. "Hey, Paul! Don't forget, we have a team dinner tonight."

Paul sighed dramatically, his forehead resting against Y/N's. "Team dinners after a tough race are the worst."

Y/N laughed and pecked his lips. "Come on, champ. It'll be fun. And maybe they can give you some tips on how to make me your official lucky charm."

Paul grinned, his mood significantly brighter. "You're right, as always. Let's go at a dinner with the team."

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scorpioriesling · 1 month

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Too Hot to Handle - Episode 5

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Characters featured: Reader, Feyre, Morrigan, Gwyn, Elain, Emerie, Amren, Cassian, Lucien, Eris, Tarquin, Rhysand, Helion, Azriel, & Tamlin

Warning(s): …none hehe

SR’s Note: Guys — I’m SO SORRY for the delay! I had a Fourth Wing event last weekend that I was traveling for, and truly wasn’t on my phone let alone had any time to write anything. It doesn’t help that I worked every day since I’ve been back and I’m leaving for a Bachelorette trip this weekend — nonetheless, I hope you’ll enjoy this next part! Tags: @velarisdusk @lilah-asteria @starlightazriel @panther-girl-124 @cynthiesjmxazrielslover @paintedbyshadows

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$180,000.

That was how much was left in the prize fund.

Well... that's how much was left before the rule break from last night.

"Seeing as we are over halfway through the retreat," Lana drawls. "I see it fitting that those who are in etsablished couples should be allowed to go on a date tonight."

The room erupts in cheers, many of the couples in their beds hugging and whooping in delight. Lucien's warm hands pull you close, so close that you're nearly topping him, and hugs you tight around your waist. You glance to the bed across the room, noticing those beautiful, pink lips in a pout, a usually slender nose scrunched on her contorted face.

You wrap your arms around Lucien's neck, carding your fingers through his soft hair when her eyes meet yours from her rather empty bed.

Serves her right.

"However -- we have not discussed the topic of rule breaking yet." The room quiets as everyone frantically looks to one another.

"Shit, man! Who has something they want to fess up to this time?" Cassian's voice bellows. His eyes scan from bed to bed, until he lands on Feyre and Rhys. "Was it you guys this time?"

Feyre blushes, touching her fingers to her lips.

"No," Rhysand yawns, pressing a light kiss to Feyre's head. "Not us this time."

Before he can continue his reprimanding, Lana lights up again.

"There were a total of three rule breaks last night," she continues, earning a few gasps from the group. "And for that, you've lost an additional $20,000 -- leaving the prize fund at only $160,000." Cassian throws his head back onto the pillows, and Amren shakes her head from beside him.

"Who did it guys? Seriously? Three of you?" He rubs his eyes with his fingers. Lucien glances sidelong at you, but you continue looking toward Lana. Three rule breaks? That's two other groups besides you and Lucien. You didn't see anything... or hear anything... other than the one break you had done yourself.

Was Lucien being truthful about him and Elain's interaction?

You sure hoped you wouldn't have to find out the hard way.

"No need to guess, Cassian, I'm more than happy to tell you -- one rule break happened between Elain..." You glanced to her, that proud smug smile on her face. Your heart dropped. Please don't say Lucien, anyone but Lucien...

"...and Eris."

You let out a sigh of relief, noticing Eris stretching his arm out behind his head, his cunning expression earning him a few eyerolls. You glance to Lucien, but see him scowling at the bed a few diagonal from you.

"Looks like your girl was holding her breath on that one," Elain says drily. You glare in her direction, barely noticing Lucien's fingers faltering from you slightly.

"You sure didn't help that," you bit out. She opened her mouth to continue, but Lana cut in.

"The second rule break was between Y/N and Lucien." She proclaims. Amren's black bob sways with annoyance, and Lucien only shrugs. No witty comeback or attempt of making light of the situation. He surely noticed how easy it was for Elain to get under your skin, rile you up like that -- and now you only hoped his feelings weren't hurt.

"Finally, the last rule broken was between Azriel," Your gaze met his as he sheepishly ran a hand throurgh his hair. The redhead he'd chosen to share a bed with looked down at their comforter, her embarassment evident on her pale cheeks. Surely he hadn't literally taken her to bed on the first night?

"...and yet again, Elain."

The room is silent, save for a few hushed gasps and murmurs between bedmates. Azriel looks around frantically, as if trying to find the words to explain.

"I didn't... I, uh... I was just deciding who to share a bed with," he rushes out. The pink on Gwyn's cheeks deepens at the statement, and she continues to keep her eyes lowered. "I swear it wasn't... I wasn't trying to cost us money-"

"Every thing we do here costs us money," Cassian grits out. "You all need to be on a damn leash the way you're at it -- especially you." He looks to Elain, who only proudly smirks once more.

"Cassian, you're just mad you haven't gotten any yet," Elain winks. Cassian grumbles, laying back in his bed and running a hand over his face. You turn to Lucien again, who seems zoned out.

"She's a real piece of work, huh?" You say jokingly. He doesn't break from his trance, and you silently bite your lip at the lack of response. What could he possibly be thinking about right now?

"For these rule breaks -- I am offerring a deal to one group," Lana continues on.

"Y/N and Lucien," he perks up at the mention of his name.

"I am granting you a chance to win back the $5,000 your kiss cost the group tonight, by sending you on a rather exciting evening," Mor meets your eye, wiggling her brows at you.

"The two of you will go on your date, much like the others -- however, for your date, you'll be taken to a private villa where you'll spend the night together, alone. No rule breaks allowed." You raise your eyebrows. This would be impossible! Alone all night, with Lucien? You weren't sure if you could contain yourself. Though, it looked like Lucien could -- he wouldn't even meet your gaze.

"As the others will rejoin the group from their dates tonight -- I have two guests that seem like they're here for the wrong reasons." Your eyes flick to Elain, who is now brushing out her long, honey-blonde hair.

"For that, one will be sent home this morning." Everyone looks around wide-eyed. Elain was surely one contender -- but whom else?

"Elain, and Eris." Eris's brows rise slightly.

"One of you will be leaving the villa, effective immediately. The other needs to show improvement, or else they will be resigned to end their retreat early as well." Elain sighs boredly.

"Elain..." She perks up.

"Mhm, Lana?"

"Seeing as you've participated in many rule breaks, bed-hopping, and created more drama than forming real bonds with others," Lana says. Elain only rolls her eyes.

"You will be the guest leaving my retreat. Effective immediately."

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“Honestly, I’m just happy we don’t have to deal with her anymore,” Helion murmurs to Tamlin in line in front of you. “She cost us so much money.” You’re all in the kitchen, gathering plates for lunch this afternoon and it seems though she’s departed, Elain is still the topic of every conversation.

“She didn’t quite seem to be here for the right reasons anyway,” Tamlin answers, spooning chunks of papaya onto his plate.

You couldn’t agree more.

Reguardless, Lucien has seemed rather guarded since her departure this morning, giving more of a silent treatment than the rejoicing reaction you’d been hoping for. First, he went to the gym (per usual). Then, he couldn’t join you in the pool because he needed to shower. Now, apparently he was at the beach. What was going on with him?

“Ayo, Y/N,” Tarquin called from across the buffet. Your eyes met his icy blue ones. “Where’s ya boy?”

You only shrug. “Maybe down by the beach?” You answer. You notice Tamlin’s lingering stare from the corner of your eye.

“I’ll walk you down there, if you want?”

You smile, Tarquin has been nothing but kind to everyone since the group’s arrival.

“Sure thing, uh… thank you.”

You pad along the white sand, small tendrils of it brushing your calves from Tarquin’s treading beside you. He held your elbow, helping you along as you decided to bring two plates with you — one for you, and one for Lucien of course. A rather good idea on your behalf, as you spotted his dark red mane blowing wildly with every twist and turn he made on his surfboard. He’d surely be hungry.

As you approached, you watched as Emerie joined the coastline as well, smiling broadly at Tarquin as she approached. Lucien rode his last wave in, jogging up the beach and running a hand through his hair. Water fell in tiny rivlets across the expanse of muscle on his chest…

Your mouth practically watered at the sight.

“You… got it from here, yeah?” You nod to your friend, still holding your elbow. Lucien is only a few feet before you, his jaw muscle flickering as his eyes move from you, to Tarquin, to the hand he is now removing from your arm.

“‘Sup, man,” Tarquin nods.

“Yeah. ‘Sup.” Lucien says, his eyes roaming over your face. Your cheeks heat as you try so desperately to not allow your gaze to travel lower…

“I… uh, brought you this.” You thrust out one of the paper plates, and Lucien lays his board flat atop the sand.

“Thanks,” he says, sitting atop his surfboard and patting the spot next to him. You giddily take it, crossing your legs and readjusting the crochet coverup you donned. You didn’t see it, but Lucien’s eyes roved hungrily over you.

“How’d you know I liked star fruit?” He asks. You smile, happy with your choice of what to load up his plate with.

“Lucky guess,” you answered. You watched as he popped a yellow piece into his mouth, the way his lips moved. Gods, how you wished you could kiss him again. The passion, the fire from last night-

“So… I think we should address the elephant in the room,” he says, swallowing his bite. You glance to him, watching as he bites another.

“The… elephant?” You ask, feigning ignorance.

He swallows. “Elain.”

Gods, you didn’t even like hearing her name on his lips.

“Oh.”

He swallows again, bracing his for arms on his knees. “I saw you, this morning. How the mere sight of her was getting under your skin.” His fingertips delicately tuck a strand of hair behind your ear, and you roll your eyes.

“She doesn’t get-“

“Y/N, I at least know you well enough by now that I can see what makes you anxious,” he says. You sigh. He was right, and you knew you shouldn’t be playing around with something as sensitive as this.

“Well…”

“What about her gets you so… riled up? You said you trusted me when I explained nothing happened.” Lucien questions gently. You bite the inside of your cheek, gazing out at the crashing waves.

“I… do, trust you. I just…” you huff. “I don’t know, Luc. I just get maybe… nervous.” You glance to him, and he raises a brow.

“Nervous.” He repeats.

You shake your head. “It’s just… I haven’t had, this,” you gesture between the two of you. “In a long time, ok? You’re confident, and smart, and… handsome… I just get worried.” You look down at your lap. He chuckles beside you.

“You think I’m handsome?” He says. You swat his shoulder, and he catches your hand, pulling you closer to him.

“Nothing. No one. Is going to take me from you.” He says, his lips mere inches from yours. You suck in a breath — every freckle on his tanned skin, every hue in his irises — it’s all so beautiful.

“Lucien…”

He leans in, pressing a kiss to your cheek. When he pulls back, you scoot even closer, snuggling into the arm he’s draped around you.

“No one could take me from you either…. and yes I find you handsome, isn’t it obvious?”

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By 6 pm, all of the couples have gathered with the rest of the group beneath the cabana. Of course, Lana has called a meeting right before you’re supposed to go on your dates — well, in your case, you’re headed toward a night of immense restraint.

“I want to applaud the remaining individuals for not breaking my rules today,” she starts. Feyre shifts beside you, her glimmering black gown sparkling in the moonlight. She looks truly ethereal, like a queen of the night. “…and I’m happy to see you’re all ready for your dates.”

You glance up at Lucien as he wraps his arm tighter around you.

“However,” she begins, and the group groans in sync. “I do want to let the group know that there will be a new arrival to the villa, and this certain someone will be joining one of you on a date tonight.”

A few shared eyebrow raises and Lucien is pulling you even closer to him.

“This arrival may choose an individual that is either in a relationship or single this time,” she continues. “Unlike before where only given the options of those in couples.”

Eris whoops from the end of the couch, earning a few giggles from the single girls. Your eyes wander to Azriel, who seems rather attached to the redhead from his bed last night. Perhaps she’s forgiven him for his tryst with Elain.

Ugh. Elain. Gods.

“However, this arrival will be joining someone after the couples dates,” Lana explains. “So, with that, please head to your designated date locations. Y/N and Lucien, please make your way to the private villa.”

Lucien’s fingers slide down your arm, grasping yours as he makes way for the private villa.

“You excited?” He whispers huskily. You laugh nervously.

“Ugh… to not touch you all night? Thrilled.” He chuckles, his hand sliding to hold around your waist.

“Well, I’m excited.” You approach the front door, his hand not-so-subtly tracing over your bum. You suck your lip between your teeth. “Even if all I can touch is your sticky fingers.”

He winks at you, and you sigh, swinging the door open.

Oh. My.

“Fuck,” Lucien breathes. You can only stare — the enormous bed, laden with rose petals.

The chains, tools, leather paraphernalia lining the walls.

The bathtub, steaming with warm water and bubbles.

The champagne flutes.

This was so much worse than you thought. It was practically a room for a sex-crazed being, all the ready to practically film a porno.

All for you and Lucien… to not indulge in. All. Night.

What if the new arrival chose to come here with him after you?

“….fuck.” You echo.

This was going to be a long night.

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