#i should be taking a nap before work but i got insane again

[hyperblue]

obsessing over a thought of tim completely breaking down while having to explain to kon the whole "i accidentally cloned us a baby and that's so fucked up and wrong but i don't even have a decency to regret it now because i love them more than anything in the world" situation

how do you even explain that the worst thing you've ever done in your life is also simultaneously the best thing that ever happened to you

how do you even convey that if you got to go back in time and change everything, you'd still choose to do the very same objectively awful and fucked up thing

that even if given a chance, you wouldn't choose to redeem yourself because being a better person would also mean not having jack/wendy

[roosterforme]

Aim for the Sky Part 17 | Rooster x Reader

Summary: Bradley loved settling in to a new routine with Rose at home. Taking care of you and the baby felt natural. If the most stressful thing he has to deal with was her godfather, then he counted it as a win.

Warnings: Fluff, angst, adult language, lactation kink, swearing, DILF Roo

Length: 3800 words

Pairing: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x Female Reader

Aim for the Sky masterlist. This was written to accompany my series Is It Working For You? along with a bunch of my one-shots and other series, but it can be read on its own! Check my masterlist for the reading order.

"Here are your books," Bradley said softly as he carried his daughter around her nursery to her bookshelf. "And here is your crib." She blinked up at him and yawned, and he broke out into a smile. "And here's the chair from your grandparents where Mommy is going to feed you so you can take a nap."

You were standing in the doorway with both hands on Tramp's collar while he whimpered nonstop. "He's not going to rest until he gets to sniff her again," you said, fighting to hang onto him. "And lick her, and roll around on the floor next to her."

"Fine," Bradley said with a sigh. Tramp just spent twenty minutes losing his mind over the baby, but apparently that wasn't enough. Bradley sank down onto the floor with Rose in his arms, and she stretched her fists up toward his face and gave a soft cry. She looked adorable in the outfit your parents bought for her, and his heart clenched like always when he imagined how his own mom and dad would have reacted to being grandparents.

"Here he comes," you said, releasing the collar, and Tramp bounded the rest of the way into the nursery, whimpering and shaking with excitement. He licked the top of Rose's head, making her cry in the process before he started sniffing her hands.

"For fuck's sake," Bradley grunted, trying to coax Tramp to sit down while Rose curled up against his chest. "He's more excited about the baby than I am."

Carefully you sat next to him on the soft rug that looked like a cloud in the airplane nursery, kissing his cheek before you said, "Don't swear in front of the child."

He rolled his eyes. "She can't understand it yet."

You gave him a pointed look. "Don't make me take away your privileges."

Bradley opened his mouth to ask what you meant, but he was immediately silenced as you pulled your shirt over your head and got ready to feed Rose. "Shit," he muttered, wondering how the fuck he was going to last six weeks with your tits in his face and zero chance at intercourse. "I'll behave."

"While Rose eats, I think we should talk about a few things," you whispered, taking her into your arms with a smile and kissing her cheek before getting her situated.

Bradley pulled Tramp onto his lap, doing his best to keep him from loudly sniffing his human sister and making her cry again. Bradley watched you fidget with your leggings around your waist. "What's wrong? Are you uncomfortable?" he asked while you fed Rose.

"No," you muttered, not looking at him. "My body is like a deflated balloon."

"Baby Girl," he whispered, leaning in to kiss your ear softly. "You're only a few days postpartum. You birthed an entire person. And you look beautiful. You always will."

He gave up his quest to keep Tramp at bay and let the dog lick the baby's foot as you started crying. "I think my hormones are going insane again," you sobbed, and he wrapped one arm around your shoulders and helped you hold Rose with the other. "And I'm really tired."

"I know," he whispered, peppering your face with kisses. "That's why I'm sending you and the Nugget both for nap time as soon as she's done. Now let's talk about what you want to talk about."

"Right," you said with a sob, like you had forgotten all about it. "My parents aren't going to stop bugging until I tell them when they can come visit."

Now that the attic was available, Bradley didn't mind having them in the house all that much. "Since I'm taking the next week off, why don't you tell them to come out the week after that? So you can have some help when I'm on base?"

"That's a good idea," you said as you carefully maneuvered Rose to your other breast. "We also need to give Rose a godfather." Bradley closed his eyes and pictured literally anybody but Jake. "And I was thinking Jake."

He heaved a weary sigh. "Of course you were," he grouched as Tramp finally calmed down and curled up on the floor. You looked at Bradley without saying a word, and he rubbed his eyes with his fingers. Hard. Jake was a fucking pain in the ass. He always has been, and he always will be. But... he took care of you when Josh tried to assault you while Bradley was deployed. And Jake was the one he turned to when he had a panic attack about getting himself killed before he got to meet his daughter. Jake even graciously promised he would look after you and Rosie and finish building the playset if something happened to him. And he never gave Bradley a hard time for any of it.

"Fuck. How the fuck is this my life?" Bradley groaned, sprawling out on the floor with Tramp and staring at the ceiling.

"What did I say about all the swearing, Roo?" you scolded, but when Bradley focused his gaze on your face, you were smiling. "Does that mean you're okay with Jake?"

Bradley looked at Rose and then back at you. "Yeah," he rasped while wincing.

"Perfect. We can tell him when he stops over tomorrow."

"He's coming over tomorrow?"

"Yes. With Cat and Jeremiah," you said, wiping Rose's lips with a burp cloth as Bradley sat up again.

"Let me hold my Nugget to help ease my pain and suffering."

"You're so dramatic. It's not like you'll suddenly be related to Jake," you said with a laugh, literally flaunting your tits as you stood up. "I'm going to call my parents and then take a little nap as long as you've got her?"

Bradley looked at his daughter as she curled up in his arms. "Yeah. I've got her," he promised, and you kissed him before you left the nursery. 

"We're going to take a little walk," he whispered, picking up the burp cloth that you left on the chair. Bradley carried Rose through the house, marveling once again at how tiny she was in his hands as he tried to burp her. Then he slipped out the sliding glass door to the backyard as he said, "This Jake thing wasn't my idea. You heard your mother. She's got some weird ideas sometimes, but I love her too much to tell her no. So let's set some rules. Under no circumstances are you ever allowed to think your godfather is funnier than your old man, okay?"

Rose simply yawned as Bradley sat down on one of the swings, cradling her.

"Exactly. He's a snoozefest. I totally get the yawning." He pressed his lips to her cheek. "And when you're old enough to talk, I need you to tell him that your godmother is way cooler than your godfather. If you agree, then don't say a word."

Bradley moved the swing slowly as she snuggled against him and silently closed her eyes. "That's my girl," he whispered, keeping her warm against his body in the early spring sunlight.

------------------------------

When you woke up, your body was sore, and your stomach was growling. You didn't know what time it was, but your breasts hurt enough that you thought perhaps it was time to feed Rose again. You climbed out of bed and froze as you reached for your glasses. Something smelled good. Familiar. Your stomach rumbled loudly as you whispered, "Surely not."

Rose's door was closed when you walked down the hallway, and you found your husband in the kitchen, working in front of the stove.

"You're cooking Marry Me Rooster!"

He looked up at you with a bewildered expression on his face, like a deer caught in headlights. "I am," he replied, voice hoarse. "I've been training over facetime with your mom for months, but this is my first time actually trying it."

Your heart swelled with love as you took a step closer to him and your grandmother's recipe sheet, but he held up a hand and shook his head.

"I think it's best if I give this my full attention," he said, eyes wild as he turned back to the stove. "But maybe you should have the fire extinguisher handy just in case."

You backed slowly away from him, hand covering your mouth to try to keep your laughter in. Excitement bubbled inside you knowing you'd get to eat one of your favorite dinners tonight. Bradley was pretty good at cooking now. He could pull it off. Probably.

Your daughter's cries started ramping up in her nursery, and you had a visceral reaction to it. "I'm coming," you called out, already pulling your shirt over your head as you walked inside. The fact that she even looked adorable when her face was all scrunched up in tears was concerning to you; Bradley would be unstoppable with spoiling her.

As soon as you scooped her up into your arms, she quieted down. Her weight against your body was calming as you rocked her in the chair while you fed her, and you weren't surprised at all that Tramp was sitting at your feet with his eyes glued on the baby.

"Just wait until she can walk," you told him. "The two of you will be besties, terrorizing everyone else."

You heard some loud noises in the kitchen followed by Bradley's voice. "It's fine! It's all fine!"

"I'm kind of concerned," you whispered to Rose, running your fingers along her little bit of fuzzy hair. "But Daddy learned how to cook just for you and me. We are already spoiled."

To your surprise, dinner was mostly good. The kitchen was completely trashed, and Bradley looked like he just ran a marathon, but the food was edible. It even tasted good, if not a little bit on the salty side.

"I am so impressed, Roo," you said with a smile. He was holding Rose to his chest with one hand and inhaling the pasta and chicken.

"I wanted you to have something special. It's nowhere near as good as yours though," he mumbled with a shrug around some bites. "But it's okay. I'm kind of hoping Cat will bring food with them when they stop by tomorrow. She knows how to cook like you do. Jake and I would have probably starved to death by now."

He set his fork down to run his knuckle along Rose's cheek as you started to clean up the dishes. "I thought it was wonderful," you whispered. "Nobody else ever cooked just for me before."

That made him smile. 

----------------------------------

Bradley intended to write in the Nugget notebook while the events from the hospital were still fresh in his mind, but he passed out in bed as soon as you did. Rose cried three times overnight when she was hungry, and he realized he was actually quite useless when it came to that scenario. All he could really do to help was burp her. By the time he was making breakfast, you looked absolutely exhausted.

"That was kind of a rough night," he said while trying so hard not to burn the toast.

"I think that's just how nights are going to be for a while," you replied with a yawn as you carried the baby around.

Bradley spread some of the avocado concoction he whipped up onto the perfectly toasted slice of overpriced bread that you liked, and he took Rose from you so you could have a break.

"Thanks," you muttered before biting into your breakfast. "It's still so strange that you're the one cooking now."

"Oh shit," he said in delight as he kissed his daughter. "I almost forgot."

"Stop swearing!" you called as he walked outside to the garage where that fancy baby carrier thing was. 

He'd been using it to lift weights, training for this very occasion. He snatched it up and took it back in the house where he set Rose down on the couch to fasten the straps around himself. "Look at this!" he said, slipping the baby in against his chest. You were shaking your head and finishing your toast as he paraded around wearing Rose.

"You're so adorable, Roo."

"It's not me. It's the baby." He looked down at her cute face where her cheek was squished against his chest. "Can't get enough."

You wrapped your arms carefully around him, turning Rose into a sandwich as you ran your fingers through the hair along his temples. "You are such a DILF, Bradley. Gray hairs and heart eyes for your daughter."

"Stop," he groaned, turning to kiss your wrist. "Do you have any idea how hard it's going to be for me to not fuck you right now?" Someone knocked on the front door and he gave you a look. "What time did you tell Jake and Cat to stop by?"

"Tonight," you replied, heading across the living room. "It couldn't be them."

Bradley was relieved to see Maverick when you opened the door. "I'm not staying," he said as you invited him inside with bags in his hands. "I just wanted to see this little one for myself and drop some things off." He shook Bradley's hand and then just stood there with his hands on his hips, watching Rose slowly fall asleep in her carrier. "My god," he whispered, eyes shining with tears. "A brand new Bradshaw."

"Do you want to hold her?" you asked him, already reaching for the carrier. But Maverick shook his head.

"No, let her sleep. I'll come back one day with Penny and Amelia. We'll bring pizza. Just let us know which night is good." He looked up at Bradley, cuffing him on the shoulder as he said, "I wanted to be one of the first to say congratulations. Your mom and dad would have been overjoyed."

"Thanks, Mav," Bradley whispered, tears in his own eyes now. "I'm kind of obsessed with her, so I know my mom would have been as well."

Maverick shook his head, still giving Bradley's bicep a squeeze. "Your dad would have never shut up about having a granddaughter. That's a fact."

Bradley pulled his godfather in for a hug before he left with the promise to return later in the week when he was invited. Then he kissed the top of Rose's head as you rummaged around in the bags that had been left behind.

"Penny seems to have gone a bit overboard with groceries," you muttered, pulling lunch meat, bread and some chicken breasts from one of the bags. "Oh! A bottle of pink champagne!"

"Put it in the fridge," Bradley said. "I'm going to need a drink after you tell Jake he'll be the Nugget's godfather."

You rolled your eyes and dug around in a gift bag that was overflowing with tissue paper, and you gasped as you pulled out two stuffed animals. They simply looked like birds, but when Bradley took a step closer, he laughed. 

"Mav really bought Rosie a plush goose and a plush rooster."

You had a bright smile on your beautiful face as you examined them. "He's quite the joker, but these are so cute. I'm going to put them in her nursery."

"After that, you should go take a nap," Bradley said, swaying slowly from side to side with his hand resting on the back of his daughter's head while she napped. "This little girl is sound asleep, and I can do a few chores with her in the carrier."

You gave him a look that would usually mean he was getting lucky later, but that was off the table right now. When you walked past, you kissed Rose's hand and then his cheek before you said, "Make sure you chill the champagne. We can have fun later."

-------------------------------

Jake, Cat and Jeremiah arrived with balloons, boxes of diapers, meals in tupperware containers, and a lot of excitement. 

"You didn't have to bring all of this," you said as Jake stacked things up inside the front door.

"Yes, they did," Bradley muttered, taking a peek in the food containers. "There's a casserole and a lasagna."

"You literally just ate dinner," you told him, handing Rose over to Cat who was practically vibrating with excitement. But Bradley wasn't listening as he followed the very inquisitive two year old boy around the living, making sure he didn't get hurt chasing Tramp.

"Why do babies smell so good?" Cat asked as Rose squirmed a bit in her arms. "So fresh and clean."

You didn't even get to respond before Jake squeezed you tight and said, "Congratulations, Angel. You mated with Bradshaw, and somehow the baby turned out cute."

"I would say something," Bradley retorted from next to the couch, "but I'm not allowed to swear in front of children."

Jake snorted. "I'm just messing around."

"Hey, I'm going to take him outside to play on the swings for a bit," Bradley said, scooping Jeremiah up before he could yank on Tramp's tail.

You gave him a pointed look and nodded toward Jake. "Don't we have something we'd like to ask him first?"

Bradley's smile turned into a bit of a frown. "No. I don't think we do."

"Bradley!" you scolded, and he tipped his head back with a groan.

"Fine. But I'm not saying it."

You pinched the bridge of your nose as you turned toward Jake. "Bradley and I would very much like for you to be Rose's godfather. If you're interested."

The words were barely out of your mouth before Jake had you flush against him in a bone crushing hug. "Wooo, boy. Godfather to a Bradshaw? We do live in some wild times, don't we, Rooster?"

Bradley muttered something incoherent while you asked, "Does that mean you're interested?"

He released you and turned toward Cat. "Please pass the godchild to the godfather. I'm about to make this baby an offer she can't refuse."

"She's a burrito! Not a cannoli!" Bradley called out from the sliding glass door before heading outside with Jeremiah.

"Is Phoenix her godmother?" Jake asked softly while holding Rose and supporting her head.

"Yes," you replied, in awe over how careful he was being.

"You realize that spells complete disaster, right?"

"Sure," you agreed. But you'd never seen anyone hold someone else's baby with quite as much respect as Nat and Jake held Rose.

------------------------------

Bradley played with Rose on the couch with an episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey on in the background. "You see what happens when you marry for money?" he asked his daughter as she wrapped her fingers around his pinky. "Sure, you get a Lamborghini out of the deal, but you also get arrested for tax fraud and embezzlement." He kissed her forehead. "Don't do that, okay?"

She cooed softly, and he took that as a sound of agreement.

"I'm ready."

Bradley glanced up to see you fresh out of the shower wearing the robe that Nat gave you. "I'll bring her right in," he replied.

"Grab the champagne, too."

He did exactly as he was told and handed the baby to you where you sat in the glider chair in the nursery before he carefully opened the bottle. The sound startled Rose, and she started crying hysterically. Bradley was on his knees in front of the chair instantly, kissing the top of her head. "I'm sorry, Nugget. That was way too loud."

"I think she's getting hangry, too," you mused, loosening the sash of your robe so you could feed her. And once again, Bradley was just captivated by all of it and so in love. He took a long sip of the pink champagne before offering you the bottle. "I can only have a little bit."

"I know Sweetheart, but it's your favorite." You had milk beading on your nipple while you fed Rose, and Bradley watched you lick your lips before handing the bottle back to him. He groaned softly, dizzy from all of it. 

"This is so fascinating," he whispered, taking another sip before setting the bottle down. When he reached out to touch your breast, you let him. You felt warm and heavy, and he took your milk onto his thumb and licked it clean.

"You know..." you whispered, switching Rose to your other side. "After having alcohol, it's probably a good idea to pump some of my milk to make sure she doesn't get any of it."

Bradley sat up a little straighter, willing to get you anything you needed. "Want me to set up the pump?"

"Nah," you replied, shaking your head. "I haven't gotten the hang of it yet, but I'm sure there's another way you can help me." Your graceful fingers stroked Rose's cheek as the milk drunk baby started slowing down. "When she's finished, it's your turn."

Bradley jumped to his feet as soon as Rose started to drift to sleep. "I'll get cleaned up and meet you in bed," you whispered as he took the baby from your arms. He deftly changed her diaper and got her zipped back into her sleeper before setting her in her crib.

"How about you sleep more tonight?" he asked. "Give me a chance to play with Mommy before she's too tired? I like her tits, too."

He could hear you laughing down the hallway. "I can hear you through the baby monitor!" you called out, but Bradley had no shame. He kissed his daughter one last time before turning on the night light and the ceiling fan, and then he was on his way to you.

When he stood in the doorway, you were sitting in bed with your robe open. Soft light from your lamp was making every curve of your body look irresistible to him, and now that he had you alone, he knew he was going to struggle.

He made a desperate sound as he ran his hand over his face. "Baby Girl," he whined. "I want you so bad."

"Come here," you coaxed, rubbing the spot on the bed next to you. He was there in an instant, sitting with his back against the headboard as you crawled into his lap. As soon as you nudged his shorts with your knee, he swallowed hard, saliva pooling on his tongue at the sight of your milk dripping from you and onto his shirt.

"Oh, shit," he whispered, letting you get yourself comfortable before he wrapped his arms around you. "It's my turn?"

You ran your fingers along his scarred cheek and back through his hair. "Your turn," you whispered, lips ghosting against his as he throbbed for you.

Bradley took your breasts gently in his hands, ran his thumbs along your nipples and rubbed his nose between your tits. Then he let himself taste you to his heart's content.

-------------------------------

Roo is living his very best life, other than potentially seeing Jake more frequently. Hopefully Nat will balance that out for him. Grandparents are coming to visit soon! Thanks @beyondthesefourwalls

PART 18

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[renku]

Up and Under

TWICE Chou Tzuyu x Male Reader

Sitting and staring nowhere in the middle of the park, holding a cup of coffee that went cold from that old vending machine nearby, and the freezing evening wind has no effect at all in your current state—high on adrenaline and it looks like it’d take an hour or two before it subsides in your system.

“This must remain just between us. Got it?”

Each word kept playing again and again in your head, like the same lyrics from the song five years ago that’s still not leaving your playlist. Not to mention how Chou Tzuyu—yes, the idol—whispered those words with her sexy yet cute voice along with a warm breath inducing goosebumps; from the back of your neck spreading down to your legs. You even started to question your reality. Did that really happen?

Everything that happened today was messed up, or to be exact, fucked up. But wait, how did you even get to this situation by the way?

It was about noon, and the usual routine at work is to take a break empty space upstairs before Inkigayo broadcast starts. Landing a job at a place like this isn’t something you thought of but there’s no much options on your hand, so here you are. The spot is usually silent since most are out to get their lunch. Lately, you prefer taking a nap up there since a bench is available. It’s crucial for you to have that time alone for yourself. One hour of freedom to collect your shit again is enough to get through to the rest of the shift. Work itself is already draining, but dealing with people is another.

The pace of your steps is increasing yet you still try not to make a sound. I should hurry before surviving another four hours of work, you thought. Getting closer to your so-called sanctuary, this is when things started to take a turn—a complete hundred and eighty turn.

It made you stop, and carefully listen again to make sure it’s not your head playing games at you.

“Yes— Hmm... Ah~”

You’re not definitely hearing things. It’s definitely a moan. A woman’s moan on top of that. She’s really into it; given how she lets out all those moans like no one will hear her and not giving a single damn.

Forget the nap, going back should be the immediate course action in this kind of situation. But, being a man and curiosity got the best of you.

“I shouldn’t be doing this, shit,” you whispered.

Taking extremely careful steps—almost tiptoeing, making that one, tempting peek. Lifted black skirt, fingerless-gloved right hand holding onto the handle for support, and probably her other hand doing the job. It’s quite difficult to recognize who she is since her loose, black hair covered the side of her face and a tent is already forming inside your pants. Each second that passes corresponds to the moans getting shorter and shorter, hinting that she’s close to that release.

“UGH! OH- YES, YES, OH FUCKKK!”

She threw head back, exposing the side of her face.

“Is that... Tzuyu?!” For a moment, you couldn’t move a muscle. Chou Tzuyu, who is known to be pure, kind, lovely, and innocent idol for years. Yet here she is, masturbating and made herself cum.

Your feet went cold stunned by what you just witnessed. Tzuyu then turned her head to where you are like she knew you were there all along, and not showing any sign of surprise at all when both of your eyes met. She's insanely fucking beautiful.

After fixing herself up and the mess she made, Tzuyu went right away to you. “This must remain just between us. Got it? Everything.” she whispered, then grabbed your hard member; fingers making random movements, playing with your already leaking rod making you jolt before adding, “Why don't you come here again next time? Same place, same time then maybe we can do some interesting things, don't you think?”

Does she even hear herself? How could she willingly say those words to someone she never knew her whole life. You can only nod to whatever she'll say, truth be told. The fact that a goddess like her is standing next to you is unreal.

“I got to go now, bye!” she said, winking and waving as she went on her way.

Back at the present—after reminiscing everything that happened all you could think of was, “I need to find a new job immediately.”

A/N: Hi. Ren (new name, can’t remember my old one) here. Plotless fic and not stuffed with much details to make it “smutty” enough, I just want to get the gist of writing again after not being able to make a stable progress after leaving the platform for about a year. So yeah, not much but I hope it will spark my enjoyment of writing again.

[bloodiedrogue]

MY LOVE IS MINE, ALL MINE (15)

SUMMARY: Astarion insists that you rest.

PAIRING: Astarion & Female Reader

WORD COUNT: 2,987

WARNINGS: Brief mentions of death and dissociation, a whole lot of fluff and comfort as an apology for all the angsty chapters. :^)

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Ha-ha, hey do people still care about this fic? (Sorry I went MIA, my brain got bad)

CHAPTER LIST / MASTERLIST

-

It feels odd having Astarion around.

For days, his hands are almost always attached to you in some way. Gripping tightly onto your arm as he guides you out of the bed, drawing patterns into your back each night he quietly lays next to you —anything to make you feel like he’s some sort of extension of you. As if he’s another set of limbs there to help you heal. 

It’s nice, at first. Comforting. And for a while, as you exhaustively lay amongst the sheets and pillows, tucked against the side of his torso, it helps you forget about the world around you. How just beyond this realm of soft looks and tender touches, there’s a war raging on, developing day by day as you tirelessly drift from bed to bath and back again, trying your best not to get too restless.

Which is easier some days than others. 

For example, the first few felt like a breeze. Nothing more than a collection of hours that quickly whizzed by before you could even blink. With Astarion there to distract you, time seemed to slip from your grasp entirely. Exiting your mind in the form of lengthy naps spent latched onto your partner’s frame. 

It was blissful. A much needed break from all the chaos but it was obvious it wouldn’t last. Nothing more than a blip in an otherwise more momentous event, you could feel the restlessness of the future seeping in. Taking hold of your mind, ripping through the cavernous well of missing information that occurred during your death. You couldn’t help but wonder what had happened. How the group managed without you —how Astarion managed.

Based on the lack of space given during the healing process, you assume badly. Considering he’s never touched you like this —like you’re the most fragile thing he’s ever placed his hands on as if at any moment one wrongful slip of his fingers might shatter you all over again— it’s apparent something within him changed. Shifting in a way that, even now, nearly a week later his presence is still stagnant.  

And for the most part, it is nice. A welcomed change amongst all the bullshit. Having him there with you —seeing the lengths he’s willing to go to make sure that you’re safe is unparalleled to anything you’ve ever felt. A dream within a plague of nightmares lulling you to sleep each night he holds you close, telling you that everything’s fine. At least, until it isn’t. Then it feels like suffocation. Like his once-loving hands are now wrapped around your throat, reminding you of what little time you have left. Forcing you to realize that, instead of lying around living in ignorance of the task at hand, you should be helping —working alongside the rest of the party to complete your common goal. 

“I need to move, Astarion,” you tell him. Almost angrily, you press your hands to either side of his face, narrowing your eyes, watching the way he rolls his own and frowns.

“Zamrie said—“

“Oh, my Gods, forget what Zamrie said!” Before he can even protest you’re on your feet and moving towards the door, ignoring the way he huffs in response. Blocking out the sounds of his angered protests as you begin to pull on your boots. “I swear, if I don’t get out of this room I’m going to go insane!”

Surprisingly, he doesn’t do anything other than try to talk you out of it. Relaying each point of criticism with facts to back up his claims, watching the way your face twists in annoyance the longer you realize he’s right. 

Because despite mentally feeling alright aside from the lack of stimulus, you’re still exhausted. A feeling you hadn’t anticipated to take so long to recover from. Assuming you were under the hindrance of any other common illness, you figured you’d be back to normal in a few days tops. No longer feeling numb or shaky. But then again, you were dead. And for a while too, so unfortunately it makes sense as to why as you finish tying your first boot you’re already out of breath. Heavily panting against the warm air of the inn’s top floor as you glance to see Astarion’s smug look. 

“You know I’m right,” he says, and all you do is awkwardly walk back to the bed with your boot still on, collapsing face-first into the mattress with a groan. 

“I’m so bored.”

“And what do you want me to do about it?” 

In response, you merely grumble, feeling him roll you over so that he can untie the laces of your shoe, kneeling at the edge of the bed for better access as you let out a huff, unsure what to say.

Because really, there aren’t very many options left. Already you’ve read every book your party has and then some thanks to Gale and his lengthy trip to Sorcerer’s Sundries, as well as exhausted all your conversation topics. At this point, there’s nothing left but card games and sleeping and Astarion frequently cheats which leaves you with the most boring option. The one you’d rather suffer through the pain of activity than submit to, prompting you to look at Astarion with pleading eyes, praying that just this once he’ll give in. 

“Don’t look at me like that.” 

You narrow your eyes and wiggle your foot as he eventually discards your boot, quickly moving to kick his face in annoyance only to have him catch it before you make contact.

“If you don’t stop I’ll cast hold person on you,” he threatens then, moving to grip your knee and pull you towards the edge of the bed. Smirking at the sound of you squealing in amusement at the sudden shift in position. 

“You’d like that wouldn’t you?” you tease, but all he does is slowly maneuver himself above you, slotting his hips between your already spread legs. Ignoring the way your face contorts to showcase the sudden nerves that erupt. 

“I would because then you’d actually rest.” 

“But I am resting.” 

“Hm, are you?”

“I’m laying down aren’t I?”

“That’s different than resting, my love.” 

“Is it?”

Somehow he’s managed to distract you with conversation long enough for you not to notice he’s looming above you. Pressing his palms against the spaces next to your head —shifting the lower half of his body to lightly press against your own. 

Upon noticing this, you swallow hard and try not to smile. Forcing down the anxiety of Astarion’s mischievous gaze exploring your features —taking in the obvious temptation that’s begun to surface. 

“You don’t seem very tired,” he tells you. Teasing you in a way that has you rolling your eyes, allowing it to happen because, while you’ve exhausted a lot of options to entertain yourself, sex isn’t one of them. Considering the two of you have been too busy reuniting and making sure everything about your resurrection continued to go smoothly, the thought really hadn’t occurred to either of you. 

Far too lost in the simple touches of each other’s company, up until now it felt more important just to coexist. To relax and monitor rather than jump into something that could only result in complications. 

Which is a thought that sits at the back of your mind. Even as he leans down, nudging your nose with his —saying something flirtatious that you completely miss due to the passing thoughts that stroll through your head— you can’t help but wonder if it’s a good idea.

“Are you sure we—“

He cuts you off with a gentle kiss. One that lingers for a couple of seconds before it’s over and he’s grinning above you, moving to glide his thumb along your cheek. “We don’t have to if you don’t want to.“

“No, I just —is it right?” 

He scrunches up his face, looking at you in confusion. Making you realize how offensive your words probably sound. “Sorry, I don’t mean it like that.”

“Then how did you mean it?”

You take a minute to put together your thoughts, ignoring the way he longs for your answer. Feeling him shift slightly backwards in anticipation of your inevitable rejection. 

“Is this the right time to be doing this?”

He raises his brow and sort of laughs. “Do you mean that morally or?”

“Kind of?”

“Kind of?”

All you do is scoff in embarrassment, moving your hands to cover your face. “I just mean that… should we be having sex while the others are doing all the work?” 

Astarion really laughs at that, his voice practically rising a full octave as he swats away your hands, watching your annoyance only increase at his actions. “Seriously? That’s what you’re concerned about?”

“I feel like it’s a valid concern.” 

“Well, it’s not.” 

“Okay but I think—” 

He steals another kiss, ignoring the groan of protest that hits his lips. Opting to instead grab your cheek again, gliding his fingers against your skin. Feeling the way you almost immediately settle into his touch the moment he pulls away. 

“Darling, you and I both know the other’s don’t give a shit what we do. So long as it’s somewhat legal and doesn’t disturb their sleep.” 

Moving your hands to his torso, you practically sigh in defeat, pinching his hips with frustrated fingers as you lean up and kiss his chin. “I don’t know. I think Gale might be jealous if he comes back and sees us.”

As you fall back down he chases you instantly, enveloping your mouth in his a third time, knowing then that you’re surrendering. That instead of fighting the urge to make excuses, you’re allowing yourself to enjoy what he’s offering. To experience that connection without the added baggage of not knowing whether or not there’s feelings involved. 

Because now that you’ve admitted it —now that both of you have said those three little words, it feels completely different. After travelling and talking and experiencing that unfortunate blip of separation there’s a whole other dynamic that takes place.

For example, somehow his touch is gentler. And not because of your current physical setbacks. No, there’s something tender about it. As if the care he has for you has extended from his heart to his palms, guiding them in ways that make your chest tighten with newfound anticipation. Against your flesh, his fingers are delicately placed, slipping to grip the back of your neck, sprawling out to cover as much surface area as possible. 

Sighing into him, your thoughts wander to different positions. Imagining all of the ways the two of you might end up, you can feel your stomach twist with excitement. Your mouth curling up into an empty-minded smile, unaware of the joy that radiates between you. Too distracted by the happy sound he makes when you grip the waistline of his pants. 

“Does this serve as a good enough distraction for your boredom?” 

You hum and kiss him, eventually pulling back to nod. “Only if it’s okay.” 

For a moment he pauses, his expression turning from playful to serious. His eyes softening at the weight of your words, realizing that you mean it. That for once in his life he’s in control of his own pleasure. 

“I promise you, I wouldn’t offer if it wasn’t,” he eventually tells you, and all you do is beam. Moving your hands to his face, you look at him with affectionate pride, running your thumbs along the highpoint of his cheeks —pressing down as you pull him back to rest his forehead against yours.

“I love you so much,” you say, closing your eyes, hearing him softly hum in a way that rips the air right out of your lungs. Feeling the way he stiffens before he ultimately melts beneath your touch, allowing the full weight of his body to press against yours. 

“You mean the world to me,” he responds, moving to kiss your cheek before moving to the other before you open your eyes again to see him hovering above. “When I lost you I—“

You don’t interrupt him. Instead, you just press your lips together and offer a nod, watching his mind work through the blockage. 

“Losing you felt like losing hope. Like I was being shoved back into that blasted mausoleum all over again.” He pauses to swallow, watching you stare into his eyes, refusing to break the contact even though it’s obvious he wants to. “I don’t want to feel like that ever again. I can’t —I won’t.” 

Your hands move towards his shoulders, slowly weaving their way around his neck to pull him close. To let him feel the pounding heart inside your chest and how its pace quickens because of him.

“I know it may seem like I’m ungrateful a lot of the time —that I’m brash or unkind but don’t think for a second I take for granted what you feel for me.” His lips press against yours for a second before they’re separate again. “I love you and I won’t let anything more happen to you.”

As soon as he finishes you can’t help but pull him against your chest, placing a kiss to the crown of his head before resting your chin on top of it. “Mm, you really have a way with words don’t you?”

All he does is chuckle. “I would hope so after all the mindless chatter I’ve done over the last two centuries.”

“I’m sure you’ve swept your fair share of feet with that beautiful voice of yours.” 

He cranes his neck to look up at you. “My voice is pretty beautiful, isn’t it?”

“It’s like music to my ears, darling,” you tell him, partially mocking him as he scoffs in response and reaches for the nearest pillow to smother your already giggling face.

 “Don’t mock me.” 

Awkwardly moving to shove the pillow aside, you feel him shift against you as he sits up, grabbing both of your wrists and pinning them above your head. “Actually, you know what, I take back what I said —I actually hate you.”

“No you don’t.” 

You scrunch up your face in fake annoyance as he leans down again, giving you a chastising look. “I do. So much so that I don’t want to have sex with you anymore.”

“Oh, really?”

While nodding your head, you try your best to get him to release your wrists but to no avail, eventually sighing in response. “Yeah, I’d rather take a bath instead, I think. Get you to wash my hair or something.”

Without even protesting he just kisses your nose and rises from the bed, readying the bath. Taking it upon himself to focus on the task at hand rather than your lingering eyes staring at his dishevelled hair and the way his clothes have shifted out of place thanks to your roaming hands. Something that shouldn’t annoy you but does as you crave his attention. Finding yourself wanting desperately to keep him connected any way you can. 

Because despite knowing he’s here with you, sometimes he isn’t. Instead, sometimes he’s lost in far-off lands, travelling by himself in fear, trying desperately to get back. Behind his eyes, you can always tell when he’s absent because his eyes sort of shift out of focus, dismissing whatever’s directly in front of him in favour of relieving whatever awful memory’s been triggered. 

It breaks your heart. Ultimately spurring you to stand and move behind, wrapping your arms around him as he finishes up the bath. 

“C’mon, get it before it gets cold.” 

Despite wanting to playfully protest, you listen. Taking a reluctant step back while releasing his frame, you slowly begin to peel off your clothes, feeling his fingertips reach for your stomach as you throw your tunic over your head.

“Can I help you?” 

Looking down at his hand, you see his fingers draw patterns into your flesh. How they practically dance their way down to your waist before his other hand slips to the buttons of your trousers. 

“Other way around.”

You look at him, confused, prompting him to laugh. 

“Figured you could use a hand with these.” He tugs the button through the hole with one quick swipe, causing you to bite back a smirk and roll your eyes, allowing him to slowly drag the fabric down your legs. Watching as he moves to his knees along with it. 

Once there, he motions for you to step out of each pant leg, discarding the fabric entirely. Grinning up at you once you’re left only in your underwear. 

“Gods, you’re…” He doesn’t finish. Instead, he just kisses the inner portion of your thigh as he plays with the edge of the fabric, looking up at you with pleading eyes. The kind that you merely nod at, suddenly feeling nervous.

Because it’s been a while since he’s seen you like this. And even so, it continues to feel different. More intimate somehow as he moves at a leisurely pace, kissing your skin while exposing your sex. As it happens, you have to look away and take a breath, feeling everything shift past your thighs and knees, eventually moving to your calves and feet before there’s nothing against you. No fabric or hands or lips —only the suffocating air of the inn hitting your bare skin, forcing you to uncomfortably squirm as you look down. 

“Beautiful,” he mutters, and suddenly it feels like your heart is bursting against your chest, watching as he leans forward to pepper a few kisses along your upper legs, reaching for the scars that line your stomach —ignoring the way they twitch beneath his fingertips as he traces over them. “How about we get you into the tub before the water gets cold, hm?”

Almost nervously you nod, feeling him grip your hips for support as he moves to stand before guiding you into the tub without another word. 

-

TAGLIST:

@poohxlove @gaiasmight @sassy-stupid @novarex @v-gremlin @sapphiccloud @lipstickghoulie @kuroitsukyo @jjfchk @idiotsatan @bluestuesday @bloopthebat @art-by-greenie @heneralmoon @sukunababe @dreamingaboutyousworld @ranfithegood @haniscrying @liadamerondjarin @the-lake-is-calling @marina-and-the-memes @rookieoftheyear @zraloci-cpr @kaetmo @snickerdoodle-daydream @wowowwild @d1anna @raswiet @conniesbbymama @venus-wrts @demonicthorns @kihten @sanscas @spammypasta @leighsartworks216 @rose-gold-blue @p1ssmagg0t @hellish-writes @ghostinvenus @otayz @sexysquatch @sleepyeclair @colorful-anxieties @alina-exe @lillifer @girlwiththepapatattoo @acelin-ginsberg @pinkuranium @catrad0rable @scarletrosesposts @qwnamidala @itsrosebabe @bunnyperi @queenofcarrotflowers-s @tatumadams20 @spkyxszn @chlort @f3v3rs @awkwardwookie @joy-the-reader @warm-milk-with-honey-blog @vertigocrime @iyis @wildpiper @pebblethestone @tillywasneverhere @bex-03 @revemiya @staticspouse @itzagothamcitysiren

(taglist continued in reblogs)

[acediaedeus]

I just know coming off of the battle high after a spar with Ichigo makes Grimmjow a little bit dumb, and he’s suddenly all loose, and relaxed. a cat readying for a nap after eating a mouse it caught for lunch.

so obviously this state of his leads to some interesting revelations. because the first time Ichigo witnesses this abrupt relaxation he immediately goes into panic mode, and hurries over to check on Grimmjow. but all Ichigo gets when he grasps his forearm to pull the fucker up and get him into the healing spring, is a half-lidded look full of reverence and satisfaction, which hits him like a freight train, and makes him go dumb too. because, sure, he’s witnessed his fair share of Grimmjow’s satisfied looks. but all of them were marred by blood splattered across Grimmjow’s everything, coating his sword, his hands, a lot of the times his teeth (asshole loves taking a bite out of him), they were pure battle and blood thirstiness. this? this is wholly uncharted territory. it’s soft, and contented, and all around nothing like what Grimmjow is. and then it hits Ichigo that maybe he doesn’t know what Grimmjow is like at all. and then, for the first time in his life, he finds himself jealous, of all things. because there definitely someone that does know this side of his favourite Arrancar (there isn’t).

also, let it not be forgotten, that Ichigo’s kind of an idiot, at least when it comes to things that aren’t beating up thugs and gods, or Shakespearean tragedies and dramas. so it should be no surprise that this also happens to him. that just like Grimmjow, he too, becomes just a tiny but dumber. but instead of a cat that got the mouse, he’s more akin to a lizard basking on a sun-warmed rock.

revelations come from this too. and although at the start of their arrangement Grimmjow isn’t even close to being so nice as to help the asshole up, and make sure he’s fine, that doesn’t stop Ichigo from propping himself up on his elbows and beaming an absolutely blinding smile at Grimmjow, before passing the fuck out. and because Grimmjow is still unsure of what’s to happen now, and also not at all accustomed or prepared for human interaction, he thinks the bastard’s good will ran out already, and this is some pathetic last resort attack on his senses. but Kurosaki’s not moving, very obviously sleeping (and isn’t that an insane power move? “hey look, I’m so sure you’re not anywhere near my level, that I’m going to sleep right in front of you, my enemy.” downright mocking, how dare he). he opens a Garganta, and ditches as fast as his sonído will allow, before his brain even starts trying to find any other explanations as to what THAT was. he tries not to think about it, and swears to, from now on, leave before Kurosaki attempts any bullshit.

but the next time it happens some stupid curiosity wins out, and he stays, and he watches as the Shinigami does the whole routine all over again, and… Grimmjow suddenly can’t breathe, can’t take his wide (surely from fear) eyes off of Kurosaki’s prone figure, his face bursts into flames, his mouth runs dry, and that useless dead heart in his chest beats out of rhythm. whatever he’s doing, whatever that attack is, it’s working, and Grimmjow better get away fast.

later, much later, Grimmjow will realise that the reaction he, at first, classified as a symptom of poisoning, was him falling in love with the way Kurosaki’s permanently scowling face stretches out in an expression of pure joy just for him to see.

[thefiery-phoenix]

COMING HOME INJURED

You had some hero work to do and you had to take care of some villains. You got yourself injured pretty bad and you have no idea what's in store after you come home. Jump RIGHT in to see how your yanderes would react to you getting injured

Bakugou: Blood poured from your lip and dribbled down your chin and you felt like you had broken a dew ribs. You pushed open the front door, almost ready to faint inside when you suddenly heard an angry voice thundering at you from the kitchen

''Y/N, where the HELL have you been?'' yelled Bakugou angrily. You didn't bother answering him at first since you kind of felt dizzy and you had to sit on the sofa to regain a bit of your consciousness, but you thought that a little nap wouldn't hurt either 

Katsuki looked how badly you were beat up, body littered in bruises, blood gushing from different parts of your body as you struggled to keep your eyes open, you looked like you were dead on your feet

His teeth grinded as he struggled to caress your cheek as tenderly as possible. Hot, fiery rage lit up the pit of his stomach, almost travelling to his hands before he stopped himself from exploding just next to your face

He was beyond PISSED, he was LIVID and FURIOUS at YOU for getting into this mess at the man who thought he could live after doing such a thing. And angry at himself for never trusting his gut and locking you away for good to keep you safe and protect you 

"I'll kill whoever did this to you! I swear, even if it takes me my life'' 

Becomes REALLY clingy to you after this incident and soon kidnaps you (no surprises there)

Shoto: He could only watch horrified and looking shell shocked, like a fish out of water as you stumbled in with a black eye and limped with an almost fractured leg

Went INSANE with worry as soon as he saw you in this state

After five minutes of him checking every inch of your body for more damage, he finally leaves and returns with a cup of steaming something

He looks like Satan spawn as he asks you, ''Who. did . THIS!?'' 

''No worries, the pros have already arrested him'' you replied calmly slightly wincing at the pain

This precious bby makes sure to massage you and makes you feel comfy and safe. He tries to make your pain go away 

"Okay. Fine. I'll let it go. But please be more careful next time."

That night, he glares at the ceiling, unable to sleep thinking about that no good scumbag who hurt the love of his life (aka YOU)

With his amount of money and fame, he quickly made a small visit to the place where the villain was detained. He bribed the people there and threatened them not to say anything as he murdered the villain who hurt you and threw his remains over a bridge into a gushing river. When he finally returned home, you didn't even stir once as he showered off the scumbag's touch and returned to his place in your arms with dripping hair

 "Shh, go back to sleep, YN." And you did, ever so safe with Todoroki at your side Because with him, nobody would dare to hurt you again

Deku: The second you walk through the door, Deku's at your side, ushering you into the bathroom. With a washcloth, he wipes the dirt from your face and neck, stopping every few seconds to stare at the finger-shaped bruises on the skin

"I should have been there, YN." His teeth grit in frustration and his hands ball up into fists. "I should have kept you safe." 

Starts mumbling how useless he is and how its all his fault for not protecting you and what a failure of a hero he is (aww... poor baby)

You assure him that it isn't HIS fault and tell him everything will be all right. "You're wrong, YN. I should have been there. It's my responsibility to keep you safe."

After he finishes treating your wounds, he makes your favorite food and he cuddles you to sleep, slowly stroking your hair as he whispers praises in your ear for being so brave, but part of him inclined him to kidnap you so you won't have to get hurt like this ever again

Soon, like Todoroki, he quickly got rid of that villain who hurt you so badly and started making preparations of your new lives together as he watched you sleep in bliss, humming peacefully.....

[nicorobinmywife]

Hii, it's me again cuz i love your writing, hope youre doing well and taking care of yourself

Would you write law x male reader in which reader teases law a lot but never actually kisses him then distances himself a little just to see what laws gonna do, so law gets all flustered cuz he wants attention but doesnt know how to ask for it. Bonus for reader pulling law to his lap to give him a kiss and law pulling his hat down to hide his face

Hope it's not too much 😭

when your grumpy captain wants a Kiss. | Law x Male Reader.

Trafalgar was spending another night up working in his office, with just a cup of coffee by his side to keep him going, the noise of the door opening caught the tattooed man's attention and he glances at the intruder who dares to interrupt his peace, you.

you had just taken a shower and only a towel covered your wet body, Law would probably curse you out for wetting his office floor, however he was busy, with his eyes scanning your attractive body and trying to keep his cheeks from turning red, your teasing smile just made him want to run away, Trafalgar hates the effect you have on him.

- you should get some rest, captain. - you mutter leaning your back against the wall, crossing your arms making the volume in your chest increase, Law couldn't help but look.

- get out of my office. - Trafalgar grumbles in his signature grumpy tone and tries to refocus on the papers on his desk, making you chuckle lightly and walk over to him.

- hey, you're being rude. - you quickly spun his chair around making your captain face you, making Law gasp with his face close so to yours. - maybe a kiss can lift your mood, what do you think, Law? - you rest your strong arms on Law's chair, leaving the poor captain with no way out, your face getting closer and closer to his.

Trafalgar could feel that he was about to fall into insanity, their eyes were trembling along with his lips, cold sweat was running down the skin of his face, Law could feel a glimpse of your lips touching his, he wanted so much to taste you, to feel your tongue running through his mouth, Law never felt that for anyone before.

before Law could completely surrender to you, surrender to the desire to feel your kiss, you pulled your face away, distancing your lips and laughing lightly at his reaction.

- this time you I almost got you, you should see the look on your face. - you laugh as Law tries to compose himself with his face completely red, preferring to bury himself in a hole than look at you again, no matter how much Law tries to fight the urge to surrender to you, he always fails, not even the battles he experienced previously were as difficult as this one.

for a moment you felt bad for playing with your captain like that, it was obvious that he wanted to kiss you, however Law still has difficulties when it comes to feelings or physical attraction, he wanted so badly to surrender to you and receive your attention, your touch, your kiss, everything, and the fact that you always teased him was almost a form of torture for Law, he wanted to hate you but he couldn't.

- you know what? i'm tired, get out of my office, I want to take a nap and you're in my way, don't make me ask twice. - Law orders with an authoritative tone, dropping all the papers on his desk, not even having the patience to work, the captain was so frustrated he just wanted to sleep and try to forget about everything...forget about whatever he feels for you.

- I was hoping that you would ask me to kiss you someday, but at this point I realized that will never happen. - you let out a sigh, watching Law walking towards the bed next to his desk, still avoiding eye contact with you, a mischievous smile appears on your lips, walking towards Law, you pull him suddenly, sitting on the bed with the captain in your lap.

Trafalgar was so shocked he hardly knew how to react, just wide-eyed and gritting his teeth, and the fact that you're still only in a towel makes him even more nervous, your arms go around his waist bringing him closer to you, making Trafalgar feel a shiver run down his spine.

- so i'll kiss you anyway. - you pull Trafalgar's face, placing your lips on his and ending this silly game, with Law finally letting go of his pride and allowing you to explore his mouth with your tongue, law couldn't believe this was really happening, he could even feel butterflies in his stomach from the sweet taste of your lips, even though he was too old to feel something like that.

Law changes his position, still on your lap, intertwining his legs around your waist, not wanting to stop the kiss, even if you and he die without breath, a muffled laugh escapes your lips, seeing how desperate he was, you imagined that Law must have waited weeks or months for an intimate moment like this with you.

eventually the kiss ended, with you and Law with your foreheads touching each other, trying to catch your breath, you wanted to say something but you preferred to wait to hear what Trafalgar had to say, you smiled seeing Law blushing and covering his face with his hat, finding it adorable.

- If you don't put some damn clothes on, you're going to be in trouble. - Law threatens with his authoritative captain tone, you raise an eyebrow and a new mischievous smile appears on your face.

- I agree, otherwise we will do much more than just a kiss. - Law blushed again, covering his face with his hat and burying his face in the corner of your neck to avoid eye contact, while you chuckled, loving the effect you have on your grumpy captain.

[storiesbyjes2g]

3.54 Flames...literally

Though I didn't own much, downsizing my life turned out to be much harder than I anticipated. I could only take a few pictures and had to decide what items from my desk and dresser I could part with and leave behind. How many skin care products and colognes did one man need? In the grand scheme of things, the decision was like splitting hairs but still quite difficult to make. I had a routine, and those things were part of that routine. Living somewhere else was one thing, but upsetting the routine was a different flavor of cow's milk. But I eventually made my selections and arrived back home before Sophia. Unfortunately, I didn't make it back in time to implement my secret plan, and she walked in on me scrambling.

Even in her work uniform, she took my breath away, though she looked kind of tired. She sniffed the air and said something smelled good. Since the cat was out of the bag, I went ahead and explained.

"Hi! Uhh...So like, I know it's super early, and no one has dinner at 3:00, but I wanted to do something special and have a meal ready for you."

She flashed that beautiful smile that always tore me into pieces and sat at the table.

"Awwwww! That's so sweet! I'm so tired I can only dream of eating right now," she said. "I'm sorry. Does that ruin your plan?"

"Not at all! I just got started like ten minutes ago, so that's perfect. Get some rest. I'll be done by the time you wake up."

Her kiss on my forehead left a tender warmth on my skin as she disappeared into the bedroom to nap. I resumed preparing our dinner and couldn't help but feel a surge of joy coursing through me. The thought of being able to see her beautiful face every day, to support her in any way possible, filled my soul with an overwhelming sense of happiness, so much so I almost forgot why exactly I feared this for so long. Almost. A few concerns still lingered in the back of my mind. Moving in happened so randomly and haphazardly. I wouldn't blame anyone for questioning my judgment because the whole situation was absolutely insane. But through it all, I took solace in the fact that I was not alone. Sophia and I were in this together, ready to tackle the challenges that lay ahead.

I expected her nap to last longer, but she woke up and I was still not finished with dinner. Her shower bought me a few more minutes, and by the time she came out and sat with me, I was in the home stretch. When I inquired about her day, she described it as exhausting. Apparently, the change in season always caused an influx of patients, and they were short staffed, so she had to do three times the work.

I don't know if I was too into her story or what, but I definitely was not paying attention to my task. Suddenly, a huge flame shot up from the pan, and I ducked.

I thought about Maira and how quickly that situation escalated. My face was still pretty hot as I shielded myself, and I was afraid I had lost my eyebrows.

Sophia dashed to me.

"Luca! Are you okay? What happened?"

"Are my eyebrows okay??"

She covered her mouth to stifle a giggle.

"Your eyebrows are intact, babe."

"Thank Watcher."

I turned back to the stove to continue cooking—more carefully that time.

"You know," she began,"...when you said I could get meal service, I thought that meant you could actually cook."

"My hand slipped!! I added a splash too much sauce. It's fine. You'll see."

"Mmm hmm."

She teased me about my cooking skills and fearing for her safety. We laughed and joked our way through completion, and it felt so good. It felt right, and I filed that moment away for when the doubt and fear reared its ugly head again.

As I placed the food on the table, I noticed I instinctively made a vegetarian meal. That's when it occurred to me I never asked if she had any dietary restrictions or concerns.

"I should have asked sooner, but is there anything you don't eat?"

"Oh, yeah," she said. "Thanks for asking. I'm lactose intolerant."

Great. I went from one restricted household to an equally restricted household. At least she ate meat. But no milk? That would be tricky.

The food had disappeared from our plates a while ago, but we were still sitting at the table, talking and laughing. I loved how we could discuss literally everything. True, there were still things we didn't know about each other, but we were past that initial getting to know you phase where every hang out turned into a game of Twenty Questions.

"I was just thinking about how you used to complain about your mom waking you up to cook breakfast," she said. "Look at you now!"

I think I blushed. I could only imagine what she must have thought of me in the early days of my young adult life.

"You remember that? You must have thought I was a spoiled brat or something."

"I may have rolled my eyes."

"I'm so glad I ran into you that day."

"Me too."

[evilrat-sabre]

Welsknight Season 7, EP 1 and 2 a Rat's report

So I started watching Wels season 7 again for reasons™ and decided I should take notes, not only of what he does, but about things I observe around the server, so here is my trying to understand my own notes and sharing with y'all. Idk if I will do it again, but I had fun doing this.

Note: I did it again! NEXT

INSANE "Starter" House! | Hermitcraft 7 - Ep. 1

27:04 length, posted 23 may 2020. Watched 30 January 2023.

Wels starts the video referring to it as Season 6, he says that he just had a nap, and he is ready to go work in "projects"

He finds it weird that no one is online Cub enters the world and gets weirded out with Wels being on the word Wels talks with Cub in the nether hub -Wels calls Cub a vex and this makes me unreasonable happy -Wels refers to season 7 as "the future" He goes through a suspicious diamond portal and ends in Hermitcraft season 7

At season 7 Cub gives him some of Scar's crystals, He grabs two:

"Courage of the lion" and a "A gift of love", because I quote -Love is all you need-

Some time observation notes:

Grass and mycelium mix in the Shopping District, this is before the war.

I see a Mumbo for mayor map, I am still not sure what point in the mayoral election this is.

It's before the nether update: The button is alive.

I probably should mention he builds his starter base, it has a lovely colour pallet.

This is where my episode one notes ends, but I went a little bonkers with episode two notes,

Mines & Landscapes | Hermitcraft 7 - Ep. 2

26:15 length, posted 27 may 2020. Watched 30 January 2023.

He starts mining and talking about the burnout he was going through, apparently he took a 8 months break of minecraft, started streaming and swapped to a more general gaming content creation.

Personal note: This reminded me why I started watching Wels to begin with; the man was receiving awful comments, because of his lack of minecraft posting. I was new to the fandom and hadn't ever watched him before, when I got here he was already going with his now very familiar cycle of posting minecraft and vanishing for some time, maybe posting another game and maybe posting nothing for months. I will not lie, I started watching him of pure spite to the awful people that felt like it was a acceptable comportment to go to this guy's comment section and talk shit about how if he wasn't going to post he should get kicked out Hermitcraft. I said it at that time and I will always repeat: You are aren't entitled NOTHING, Wels and honestly any other youtuber, by default owns you nothing, and being a little hater will only ostracize you from other people from this community. aNYWAY; I got hooked in his Binding of Isaac series, and to today he is my favorite youtuber, and his videos -Minecraft or not- bring me great joy. Okay back to my report.

*Spams clicks his bed when the sun starts to go downs* "Bdubs isn't online, someone gotta fill up" Sir, just admit you have a sleeping problem /j

*Insert epic wither skeleton killing montage here*

The button is dead. Wels comment at seeing it dead: "The Gift machine is broken, good thing I didn't spend a long time camping, I could be hurt"

Wels starts going through the mayoral candidates and starts reasoning why he wouldn't vote to some of them

Mumbo: "I can't in good conscious support Mumbo, because I don't need a spoon" (Personal note: I was so amused I anoted the time stamp 07:15) Scar: Scar offered cats for everyone if he wins and I quote Wels "I don't even like cats" (Personal note: Even your favs can do wrong; sometimes living in denial and turning a blind eye for things is a good thing to do /hj) Doc: "I don't know, where I will even begin" (Personal note: "this green man was occupied having a child", Its a good start of a explanation and "He is a menace and a threat to society" is also a very reasonable one. Joe: "He isn't running for mayor" (Personal note: Yeah, he was running for something even better, the whole Dog catcher thing, may be one of the best things I ever saw in minecraft. "Create a problem that only you can solve, so now you hold political power over your fellow friends and coworkers") So this leaves Wels with two good option False and Stress, he can't really decide so he leaves his concrete vote in both of them. (Rat's reaction : Yesss, vote in our queens, oh brave knight!)

10/10 he would book again

Why is he killing the wither with a axe?? (I know why, but let me fins him weird)

He is doing his starter base interior; I am having House flipper flashbacks, at least it isn't grey.

No one sells feathers, Wels commits murder of the poultry category.

He send letters to his close neighbors, it starts with "Hidey-ho neighbor-" and I am smiling wide and losing my marbles.

Every neighbor receives two blue flowers, with exception of Jevin who receives two yellow ones (Persona note: I find this funny, because Jevin is the only one I am aware that blue is his favorite color)

Some time and world observation notes:

Barge was updated from Ep 1 to 2, Wels complimented it.

I just saw Grumbot- Oh god the shopping district was so ugly. (My actual live reaction)

This is the end of my report for now. God I am nostalgic, Season 7 was the season I got into Hermitcraft, and it fills me with joy seeing if from the pov of my favorite youtuber.

[sofiiel]

There & Back Again : xreader addition (fem/afab)

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐄𝐄: 8000+ words: (CW: angst. hurt/comfort. fluff. strained family dynamic & emotional abuse. depictions of bullying)

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So many things ran through your mind as you stood looking up at the flag pole. 

"So the word around is Lexion hoards women and children, they say they got people across the world snatching them up in shadows of trafficking rings, Cartels, Cults...the missing they aren't victims in the way you think...."

Amy's words from the night before echoed in your mind.

The thought made you shiver as you hugged herself.

"I don't want to believe her." you thought, "and yet..."

you could remember the seriousness in Amy's eyes as she spoke, she didn't look away or flinch.

There was no lie in Amy's eyes. 

"They're holding them, they're stock, like cattle the only thing is, no one knows why. The rumor is, some of them are transferred somewhere here in Hawkins. I know they took my sister, and I know one of them also helped her get out."

You kept replaying the conversation from the night before. It was driving you mad.

You'd even managed to piss off your mother, too busy replaying Amy's words in your head to respond when you had been spoken to.

your hands wrapped around your stomach as it burned softly, sent to bed without dinner and sent out to school without breakfast.

"Mother's usual lite punishment" you sighed, "it's better than the others, I'll take it. She can't be mad all day."

From the corner of your eyes, you could spot Robin heading for the front door of the school.

She watched you cautiously, clearly unsure of what to do.

"I overreacted." you thought, "I should fix it....but how do I? It'll take me days just to get up enough gumption to walk up to her again." 

With a sigh, you shook your head, "Robin, Patrick, and Chelsea. Today's going to be a long day." you murmured, heading into school as the warning bell sounded off.

Eddie guzzled down the remaining orange juice in the jug, while waiting on his pop tarts to spring from the toaster.

"So you've heard of Mr. McKinney, right?" He called to his Uncle, who was quite probably destroying the bathroom. 

The bathroom faucet stopped running and Wayne exited, drying his hands on a hand towel.

"Yeah, why?" He asked groggily, he'd only been home a little under two hours with a quick hour nap.

"No real reason," Eddie said folding his arms.

He leaned against the counter, eyes glued to the toaster.  Eddie teetered his head from side to side.

"It's just," He stalled walking his hand along the edge of the countertop with his fingers, "there might kinda be this girl," Eddie admitted.

His uncle Wayne covered his face, "if it's another one of those, all I ask is you be done before I'm home." he droned. 

Eddie's head snapped up as the pop tarts ejected.

"It's not like that," Eddie said quickly.

"I mean...I dunno she might take something but...she shows up in these, old dresses every day and hasn't ever stayed out all night," Eddie explained, his eyes searching the floor as he searched his thoughts.

Hands flying about as he talked, "She could be lying." He pondered out loud.

"But I doubt it." Eddie said.

Wayne was hardly sure the boy was even talking to him anymore, rather caught up in a debate with himself, and took the chance to pour himself a cup of cold coffee.

"No, no. She's not the type, not this one....this one is...." Eddie trailed off, turning, he grabbed his pop tarts and quietly munched on a corner without filling.

"I mean, she's so '59 it's kind of insane, it somehow works. It takes a whole year to get her to say anything on her mind but, it's like some kind of game...I guess? And she's outrageously...." Eddie turned to face his uncle to find a smug look on his face as he sipped his coffee.

Eddie looked around carefully, "why are you looking at me with that face." He asked.

Wayne simply shrugged and took a loud sip. "No reason. But you're in over your head Eddie." said Wayne making his way into the living room.

"In over my head, w-why exactly?" Eddie asked quickly, nervously chopping at his pop tart as he followed his Uncle.

"Gregory McKinney is a tight ass and if he runs his family like the Plant operations, You'd do better dealing with a father in the KGB." said Wayne.

Eddie nearly choked, "that bad, huh?" he asked slowly.

Wayne glanced up at him, Eddie watched his uncle with eyebrows raised high.

"What the hell, nobody likes me anyway." Eddie said, optimism ringing in his voice.

He grabbed his backpack and headed out the door.

"You forgot to brush your teeth this morning, Romeo!" Wayne called out dryly.

Eddie swung open the door, peeking his head back inside,

"That....would be helpful." He nearly squeaked, rushing back in and to the bathroom.

"Jesus fuckin christ! Use spray! Use spray!" Eddie shouted, fleeing the bathroom with his toothbrush and paste, opting to brush over the kitchen sink instead.

You'd been avoiding Robin all day, you knew it was a little too obvious.

"But I don't know what I should do..." you thought, watching the documentary being projected onto the wall.

Various students whispered to each other and giggled, hardly paying attention to the information being given. While the teacher himself sat perched on his desk reading a book.

The door quietly creaked open as Eddie popped his head through the door, carefully scanning the room.

Mr. Conn seemed to be distracted.

"Maybe he won't notice I'm late." Eddie thought.

His eyes soon fell on you, your focus not on the documentary, but rather through the documentary. your face faintly contorted in worry.

A small tilted smile came to Eddie's face as he spotted an empty seat beside you. 

Opening the door a bit more, Eddie slid into class, quietly making his way through the rows of desks. 

"You're late Mr.Munson" Mr. Conn called, never lifting his head away from his book.

Eddie rolled his eyes. "Oh no. stop.help.murder." he muttered under his breath dryly.

"Maybe if I buy her an ice cream? Robin likes ice cream." your mind still ran a mile a minute.

Eddie plopped down in the seat next to you, his eyes looking around the room before leaning over toward you.

"So nobody's concerned that Mr. Conn's face deep in a Mercer Mayer book?" Eddie asked you.

You jumped in a fluster, "Eddie?" you asked bewildered.

Your eyes wandered over to Mr.Conn and the thin paperback in his hands, sporting a little brown critter in green overalls standing before a yellow bathtub full of mice, frogs, and bugs.

"What?" you whispered, squinting as if your eyes had tricked you. 

"Wait...how long have you been in this class?" you asked Eddie. 

"All year?" Eddie asked back.

You wanted nothing more than to slide to the floor and inch out of the classroom like a worm.

You watched him with wide eyes for a moment and slowly turned your head back to the documentary.

"I...I knew that." you stammered.

Eddie chuckled, "relax, I usually sit in the back and admittedly sleep through Biology. I can be easy to miss." He murmured, leaning back in his seat.

"A whole person for a whole year...." you breathed.

"And to be completely fair to you, you're always out there somewhere in your head," Eddie added, rolling his neck so that he might look up at you.

"Your mind is a racehorse," Eddie said.

"You aren't wrong." you whispered with a frown.

"Anyway, I figured since we're speaking now, aren't we? Might as well stop hiding." Eddie added.

Glancing up at the documentary, he scrunched up his nose.

"Help me out?" He asked, with a subtle wave of his hand, "what is this?" 

"In Our Water, it is about a family whose water was tainted by a landfill.... Mr. Conn's been on a real eco-warrior tripp the last couple of months." you whispered.

Eddie couldn't hold back his smile as you leaned in to whisper.

Even in the dimly lit room, you were close enough for him to get a good look at your eyes, the color seemed unusually vivid.

Eddie's own eyes almost crossed as he focused on a small patch in your left eye that was an icy blue.

You could feel your cheeks warm up a little and a nervous flutter in your lungs.

"I can't have something on my face." you thought, trying your best not to reach up and feel around your face.

"I washed it this morning, and I haven't eaten yet." you told yourself.

"Would it be rude to just...look away or....." your mind now had a new problem to deal with.

"Now that's pretty damn cool," Eddie said, tapping the corner of his eye. 

You exhaled, "oh the speck..." you thought.

Your face felt as if it were mid-summer, as now you felt supremely silly.

"Um...thank you..." you said leaning away and settling back in your seat.

Eddie chuckled and did the same, focusing on the movie, "wish my eyes were half a pretty." He said.

You could feel Your mind screaming.

"Pretty? You think....I mean." You quickly shut up.

Silence lingered between you two, and Eddie tried to cover his mouth with the back of his hand as he watched you from the corner of his eyes.

He could tell your mind was about to burst as you struggled to hold in a comment. Until finally...

"Your eyes are pretty too," you murmured barely above a whisper.

Eddie laughed inwardly, but instead opted to save you any anxiety and pretend he didn't hear you.

Lunch rolled around and you had yet to reach out to Robin.

"Gee, she gets around a lot for a girl who claims not to have many friends." you thought, closing up your locker.

Your stomach squelched lightly.

"I wonder do I even bother going to the lunchroom or?" you thought.

As per your punishment, you would go without lunch too. As you weren't permitted to eat school lunches and were forbidden from making your own today.

You sighed.

"I should go to at least find Robin, however, if I do.... she'll wonder why I'm not eating and blow it up into a bigger problem and I won't be able to tell her the real reason and...."

Thinking this you pushed the air out of your lungs yet again in a long exhale, "it's actually endless." you thought.

"Maybe I can find something to do with myself." Your murmur, turning the corner into the main hall.

However, you were met with an unfriendly face.

"McKinney" Chelsea sneered.

You shrunk back slightly, slowly creating distance between the small pack of girls.

"Hello Chelsea," You spoke stiffly, keenly aware of how empty the hallway had become.

Steps sounded behind you as a smile spread across Chelsea's face.

"Steve told the whole team I'm a bitch." She growled.

You side glanced, "did he lie?" you thought, standing stone still.

"I'm sorry that's... I don't have any control over that," you said, finding yourself pinned in as the girls closed in around you.

"You had to play the helpless little dork." Chelsea hissed, giving your shoulder a shove.

Still sore from the events at the Fords, you bit your lip to stop a yelp while the bruise throbbed in protest.

"Honest, Chelsea... Nancy was the one who ran over to help. It's not my fault." you try to reason, but Chelsea clearly wasn't in the mood.

"You should have been watching where you were going instead of constantly looking off into space." She snapped. 

You lowered your head and gripped the sides of your jeans, "y-you're right, I'm sorry." you murmured.

"Maybe it's better to just give her what she wants. She'll go away faster then, right?" you asked yourself.

The girl behind you giggled, "oh so, so pathetic, no wonder your brother doesn't want to be seen with you. He might catch your Lame." She said.

You stayed silent and side glanced, "tell me something my mother hasn't already." you sighed mentally.

"Can I...go now? Please?" you asked, voice strained.

Chelsea tilted her head, "well let's see.... I'm feeling kind today, you know, if in the spirit of being nice." she hummed.

You lifted your head in shock.

"So, we can be civil," said Chelsea, but there was a sharp glint in her eyes, like a cat before it bites, and your stomach sank.

"Since you embarrassed me in front of Steve, we get to embarrass you... in front of the whole basketball team," Chelsea said with a grin.

"B-but...that'll take too long to settle they don't practice until next week, it-it's Friday." you stammered.

"True, but -" Chelsea paused and held her finger in the air as the bell rang, "you hear that, lunch is over which means gym starts soon, it's a free day." she said smirking.

"Everybody meets in the gym..." you murmured.

"Exactly." Chelsea sang. 

"What do you want from me, then?" you asked defeated. 

Chelsea smirked, "do you like strawberries..." she said cheekily.

You stood in the locker room before a mirror over one of the many sinks, biting your lip as you looked at your reflection, stuck inside the giant strawberry costume.

"At least the long sleeves and legs still cover up the bruising." you thought, the silver linings in the situation were very small.

Eddie was sitting with Scott and Gareth on the bleachers when he noticed a particular group of girls, known for being notoriously mean, overly excited as they chatted.

"So Marcy will start the tape over the speakers, and then McKinney knows to come out for her grand debut." Chelsea giggled.

"Strawberry Fields Forever, not only will she look dumb, everyone will think she's sky-high." another girl laughed.

"And both Nancy and Steve will regret associating themselves with her." Chelsea snickered.

"Don't you think this is a little much...." One girl muttered.

"This is why no one likes you, Jenna." another said flatly.

Eddie sat back and straightened up.

"Shit...shit.. Shit," He said, looking around the gym.

He wouldn't be able to turn the sound off.

"but..." he thought.

"I bet I can be louder than it." he murmured.

Turning to Gareth and Scott, he leaned in between them, "guys, I need help, our Lady Tinúviel is in trouble." He said.

"What?" asked Gareth.

"How?" Scott echoed.

"Wargs," Eddie muttered.

"Anyway, Gareth I need you to go piss off those girls over there for a while, Scott you help. I need to go find Jeff and...probably get suspended." Eddie said, hopping up from his seat.

"Wait what?" Scott called out.

"Just be ready to play, 23 - remember the radio contest!" Eddie called behind him as he ran out of the Gym, ignoring the P.E teacher's protests.

You rested on the bench in the girls' locker room, waiting for the dreaded moment you would hear the music playing from the Gym.

You swung your legs.

"If there is a god, he hates me." you muttered.

"Either that or I've done something terribly wrong and completely forgot about it, and now I'm forever cursed." you thought with a heavy sigh.

"What's taking so long?" you wondered.

"JEEEEFFFF!"

"Jeff, Jeff, Jeff!" Eddie shouted, sliding to a stop.

He threw his hands onto Jeff's shoulders.

"W-what wrong?" Jeff sputted eyes wide open.

Eddie panted and pointed up the hall.

"We need to break into the music room closet, three guitars," said Eddie drawing in a breath of air.

"And the piano." he puffed.

"The piano? Are you crazy, we just roll that up the hallway and to where?" Jeff asked, eyes large with wonder.

"The gym! Look, I can explain while we're doing it - let's go!" Eddie urged lightly pushing Jeff in the right direction.

"You've finally lost your mind, man!" Jeff gasped.

"No, no, it's always been gone - move faster!" called Eddie.

Back in the Gym, Gareth and Scott struggled with their task.

"So, um....what it's like being a girl?" Gareth asked Chelsea as she watched he and Scott with a disturbed look on her face.

"Why would that matter to you?" she asked.

"We just...wanted to know if the fragrance in shampoo makes your hair better than ours or...." Scott went on.

He and Gareth share uncomfortable glances. They weren't doing well and they knew it.

Meanwhile, bursting out of the music storage room came flying a grand piano on wheels, made out of light oak, it zoomed through the hall, guitars stacked on top of it.

"You need to slow down, we can't control this thing!" Jeff called.

"No, no left, we're going outside and around the back! They can't see us come in!" Eddie called.

"You'd better be planning to ask this girl out, or I'm going to want restitution for this, man!" Jeff called. 

"And...like...so do bra's help with back suppor-" Scott's eyes wandered over to the back door of the Gym, he could see Eddie and Jeff quietly getting the Piano inside, albeit not without a mild struggle.

"Um...you don't really care, we'll just be...going." he said, lightly pushing Gareth ahead of him.

Chelsea turned to her friends in confusion.

"Ew." she said simply.

"Ugh, he wasted time, Jules, go tell Marcy to press play." Chelsea said with a grin.

"I wish I had a camera...this would be great for the yearbook." she sighed.

From the girl's locker room you could hear the melody of the Beatles over the loudspeakers, biting your lip you got to your feet and trudged towards the door and out.

As they do, the door closed loudly, drawing everyone in the gym's attention.

Some students gawked, and others broke out into laughter instantly.

"Oh my god." Nancy breathed covering her mouth, she looked around frantically.

"She's not doing this on her own." she thought.

From a distance, Nancy spotted Chelsea and her eyes narrowed.

"Her again?" she asked.

"Her who again?" Steve asked, returning to Nancy from his teammates.

"One, two, three, four"

The song started to play and, as requested by Chelsea, you danced.

No matter how intricate and elegant Ballet may seem on a stage, the fact remains it looks less beautiful when done as a giant fruit.

"And nothing to get hung about, Strawberry fields forever"

You tried your best to block out the laughter, and even the P.E teachers were left speechless, unsure of what to do, one even laughing herself no matter how hard she tried not to.

"What the hell is wrong with your sister?" Jason asked Patrick who simply shook his head.

"Mom and Dad found her in the street....maybe whoever had her before threw her out on her head..." Patrick muttered, eyes seething.

"No nono, no, guys! We need to hurry it up!" Eddie sang in panic, slipping the electric guitar over his body. 

Scott flicked on the amps from the gymnasium stage, and the reverb vibrated the air.

"I'm not sure how well I remember this song," Gareth confessed behind the Piano.

"Doesn't matter, let's go!" Eddie said.

Not missing a beat, Gareth put his fingers to the keys, The whole room became confused  as they could hear the first few notes, of 'Strawberry Letter 23' 

"Where is that coming from?" Steve asked, watching as the P.E instructor went to investigate.

The soft piano intro mixed unevenly with the Beatles' song blaring over the loudspeakers like circus music.

You stopped dancing in your confusion.

"Nobody told you to stop!" Chelsea barked,

With a sigh you continued when the room was struck by the full-powered intro of the second song. Played via three guitars, and the electric sang the loudest as it covered the Piano key with chords.

The Gym teacher scowled as he pulled away the curtains hiding the stage behind the bleachers.

"MUNSON!" He shouted.

Eddie gave him a nervous smile but kept playing.

"It's a good deed, I swear!" Eddie said quickly, his eyes falling on you as you spun about.

In your turn, you got a glimpse of the stage, the sight of Eddie and his band causing you to fall off the tip of your toe and forward.

Catching yourself, you stood there gawking.

"Eddie?" you thought.

"They're ruining everything!" Chelsea shouted, giving Jenna a shove.

"Go tell Marcy to make the music louder!" she raged.

Jenna gave a nod and ran off.

It wasn't Metal, and it certainly wasn't his image. But Eddie tried his best to channel the same motivation he had in middle school to perform the song for the three hundred dollar prize radio contest.

"It's not three hundred...." he thought, his eyes falling back down to you, who Chelsea was shouting at. "But worth it..."

"Hello my love, I heard a kiss from you." 

He sang, and it was nothing like the original, but you can't teach a headbanger to sing Soul in the course of a few frantic minutes, so Eddie tried his best to create a version all his own.

Jeff rolled his eyes, "he's gonna owe me for the rest of his life." he thought as he drew in a breath.

"Red magic satin playing near, too - All through the morning rain I gaze, the sun doesn't shine"

Jeff sang carrying him.

Eddie glanced back at Jeff and grinned thankfully. 

"Rainbows and waterfalls run through my mind..."

"What is the freak doing?" Steve asked brows furrowed.

Nancy grinned, "trying to help...come on!" She called.

Taking Steve by the hand, Nancy led him out towards you.

mortified and dazed you look towards nancy who offered awarm smile before starting to dance to the music.

"Come on, Steve." Nancy hinted.

"I can't get down to this...what even is this?" Steve asked.

"1977 and I am sure you did once in your life when you were little. Just do it." said Nancy.

Steve shrugged, "ok, ok." he said, joining in as best he could.

"Sweet, Dance party?" another student called, taking the hand of his girlfriend, he rushed out to the middle of the gym.

"He's butchering it but...come on Roman, let's go," called Wilma, the senior cheerleader, reaching a well-manicured hand out to her boyfriend.

"My dad taught me how to dance to this song when I was little." Roman laughed, following her out.

Patrick hid his face in his hands, "my sister the giant strawberry started a dance?" He groaned.

Hoping that when he removed his hands, it would all go away.

"Seems like it...and with the freak too." Jason snickered.

"Come on, Jason, I want to dance. The rest of the cheer squad is out there." Chrissy said, lightly resting a hand on Jason's arm.

Patrick looked at his teammate and friend baffled as he led Chrissy to the floor.

"You aren't serious?" Patrick asked.

"I don't like it, but if she wants to dance, I'm not going to say no." Jason shrugged.

You quietly started to back away towards the lockers as the floor filled up with dancing students. However, you could see all three P.E instructors zeroing in on the boys playing on the stage. 

The main doors to the gym opened up, revealing the Vice Principal and several teachers, with a pack of nosey students behind them. Some even pushing past to join the party in the gym.

"Oh no." you whispered.

"Oh well...how much worse can it get?" you thought, making a run for the stage.

"You boys get down right this minute or-"

The P.E teacher was cut off as you dashed past him and to the front of the stage.

"W-Welcome student body and personnel of Hawkins High!" you called out, voice cracking as your nerves skyrocketed.

The inside of your head rang like fifty fire alarms.

"We uh...we hope you enjoy the surprise Teacher Appreciation bash! W-would the teachers and Vice Principal kindly join us on the floor!" you called.

You weren't used to having to be this peppy. 

"Appreciation?" the P.E teacher asked, looking towards the boys,

"Yes!" Jeff said quickly.

"Yes, totally, Mr. Burns." Eddie said quickly.

"W-we all planned it in fact, Chelsea was the one who um...started the music yes... the strawberry theme as an...ugh... homage to the drama club." Eddie said slowly stitching together a story.

"Yeah, we just...got confused, didn't get the memo that she was no longer going with Strawberry Letter and wanted Strawberry Fields instead." Gareth jumped in.

"A simple mistake really...but we are sorry about that." said Jeff.

 You walked up to the P.E teacher and tried your best to smile.

"Why else would I be in this silly thing.... surprise!" you called, throwing your hands in the air.

Mr. Burns finally broke out into laughter,

"This might be just what we needed after the loss of our student last year." He said with an approving grin, before going to join the other staff.

Exhaling you look at the boys.

"Sweet mother of Mystra that was close" Gareth sighed.

Scott laughed, "and the princess is saved, from the maw of the wargs." Scott cheered high-fiving Gareth.

You followed behind the boys as they left through the back of the stage.

"I can't believe that actually worked, and we're not in deep shit because of it," Jeff said.

Eddie threw his arm around your shoulders, startling you enough to draw a yelp and a flinch.

"Could you suspect such a little angel face?" Eddie said, taking on the tone most people use for babies as he grinned down at you.

Your face flared up with heat again, you could feel that uncomfortable warmth creep down your neck and drop down into your gut in the form of butterflies.

Not only was he way too close, but you were keenly made aware that you were still... in fact, a giant strawberry.

But once you realized you were back in front of the locker rooms, tears welled into your eyes,

Without thinking your arms reached out around Eddie, then past him flagging down the boys. 

While they joined in the group hug, you were unable to find words.

The boys lingered in your group hug, quietly, unsure of what to do or say at first.

"We're gonna go return the instruments," Jeff said, giving Scott and Gareth and nudge as he wiggled his way out of the group.

"Ah...yes, we should come on, let's go." Scott said, hinting,

"But I want to go back and watch the teachers try and dance." Gareth protested following behind them.

Eddie shook his head towards the sky "morons" he thought fondly.

You gasped and shot away from Eddie.

"S-sorry that was...probably very odd." you murmured.

"I won't reject a hug now or any day," Eddie said.

You looked down at your feet, pondering inwardly if you were doomed to embarrass yourself all day long.

"I overheard Cruella's plans. Couldn't let it happen. I kinda gotta live with myself." Eddie said.

"And she kinda deserved it. Now she'll have to deal with gushing teachers all day...that is, until they find out what really happened." he added.

You sniffled as the tears came back and rubbed at your eyes hopelessly as it was all pulling you under.

The relief, the humiliation, and the happiness rapidly taking over.

"Aw come on." Eddie sighed, leaning forward he tried his best to help you with your tears using the hem of his shirt. 

You swatted away his hand.

"No don't!" you gasped, covering your nose and mouth with your hands.

"What?" Eddie asked confused, shirt-wrapped finger hovering in the air.

You looked up at him with mortified, apologetic eyes.

"There is snot." you peeped.

Eddie laughed loudly, "yeah, I know, kinda hard to miss, isn't it?"

"You think I'm gonna let you walk around as a snotty strawberry?" Eddie asked.

"It's gross," you muttered.

"Gross is the green paste Gareth shoots out of his nose when you make him laugh in the middle of drinking milk." Eddie said.

"You've got like...cute little elf goo coming out your nose." He added.

You could feel your heart jitter around in your chest and your lungs clench as they wanted to scream.

Eddie giggled quietly, and the small joyful sound made your heart flutter more.

"Go on in and change and clean up. There's a whole day of school left, I'm sure I'll see you around." He said, turning to walk away.

"You can thank me profusely then!" he called back.

At the end of the school day, you perched yourself atop the hood of your car, knees drawn to your chest.

"I can't believe you hugged them," you thought to yourself, "or that you balled all over him."

You hide your face in your arms.

"Or that you cried so hard your nose ran, god he must think you're gross," you murmured.

You lifted your head to look at the sky.

"I wonder if Robin needs a ride home. I still never faced her today." you thought.

Then again, maybe it was for the best, after all - you couldn't take Robin with you to check on Amy. That would also be a hard one to explain.

"Oh, and how do you two know each other? Oh, well you know survived a horrible sex party together, ran back into each other and I hid her from the police....you know as it goes." you thought to yourself, instantly sucked into your frantic thoughts.

Eddie leaned on the hood of your car, resting his head in his hands as he looked up at you, calmly waiting for you to notice him there.

Sure, he could call out to you, "but what's the fun in that?" He asked himself.

Eventually, you would see him, and you would get that look, it was a little like startling a puppy.

Eddie smiled to himself, "I wanna be right where you look when you least expect to find someone." He hummed in his head. "I want to be your surprise."

As if his mind had spoken to you, you finally looked down, slipping a little from the hood of the car.

Eddie chuckled, "what was your horse racing against this time?" He asked you.

You slipped off the hood altogether and twisted the ends of your shirt between two fingers.

"Umm....nothing really just, friend problems I guess." you murmured.

"Well, do you want to talk about it?" Eddie asked, hooking his thumbs into his pants pockets.

You peered down at the ground still fiddling with your shirt.

"Or you know....not, that's fine too." Eddie said, "sometimes it helps to see from an outside perspective. I mean, think of how much easier it would have been for Frodo Baggins if he could have asked the readers if they thought Smeagol was two-faced." He said.

You glanced up at him and couldn't help but smile.

The tiny smile on your face made Eddie's heartbeat quicken as he grinned down at you.

"Or if someone could have warned Bilbo to carry some bug spray." He added.

He wanted that smile to stay, he wanted it to turn into a giggle, and -

"I'm going to drive myself crazy-er, trying to keep that smile there." he thought.

Eddie had fully realized he was probably overshooting his shot, but he had grand designs on getting a date, summer was coming up fast and if he was going to have time to get closer, He needed you to want him around after the school hours ended.

"I'll probably screw up one way or another, hit the BFF blanket, and fly right over the boyfriend material or some shit." Eddie thought to himself.

"And then there's the shock and horror of good ol' dad trying to run me out of town with my reputation." He mentally sighed.

"And she probably wouldn't want the freak." He thought his head tilting as he watched your face.

"Look at her, fantasy nerd or not she probably dreams of some...pretty stud who could lift her over his head on the field of the winning game." Eddie's thoughts started to create a nervous knot in his stomach and without realizing it he began to twirl his hair.

You watched as Eddie seemed to be staring right through you, you glanced behind yourself but saw nothing.

"Um" you hummed, daring to take a step closer, peering up at him, you waved your hand before his face.

"Eddie?" you asked.

With a small twitch of his body, Eddie snapped free of his thoughts.

"Huh? Sorry... I swear I meant to listen...." He said with a sheepish smile.

You matched his smile.

"It seems I'm not the only one who's got race horses up in there, huh?" you asked.

"It would seem so," Eddie said, he gestured his hand out to you.

"But...It lost its race. I'm serious if you need someone to talk to. I'm all ears." He said.

You exhaled, "there's no way I can tell him all the details. I can be vague, though. Maybe it'll be enough?" you thought.

"Well.... Robin kind of hurt my feelings...she didn't mean to, I just... overreacted, it hit some.....sensitivities? I guess. And I don't know how to go up and say I'm sorry. I can't build up the courage and I haven't seen her all day, which is odd, so I think she's avoiding me." you confessed.

Once the words got going, they wouldn't stop.

"She's the only friend I have here, and she means a lot to me. I can't afford to mess up," you murmured.

"I'm told I'm hard to put up with." those words came quietly.

"If you're hard to put up with, people are a lot more squishy than I thought they were," Eddie said.

You looked back down at your hands.

"Anyway...you're talking about Buckley...that, kind of spaztic girl in the marching band?" Eddie asked.

You giggled, "that's Robin." 

"People overreact from time to time, it happens. It's not a critical hit for a friendship. If anything," Eddie sighed, offering you a reassuring smile.

"She was giving you time to cool down. I'm sure she's probably just as freaked out. If you talk to her, it'll be fine again." He said.

"You think?" you asked timidly, Eddie winked.

"I'm positive, you're a magnet McKinney, you pull people in." he said.

Eddie's eyes spotted Chelsea sulking amongst her friends as they headed to a pink convertible.

"Even if it's the wrong kinds of people for the wrong kinds of reasons." he murmured.

You glanced over you r shoulder to see Chelsea and her crew drive off. Spotting you, one of the girls kindly gave you the finger.

In an instant, both of Eddie's hands flew up in response.

"Back at you!" He shouted out, a long disapproving scowl on his face.

"Eddie!" you gasped.

"You weren't gonna do it, and someone had to." He reasoned.

"It's not nice to flip off a girl." you said.

Eddie squinted his eyes, "Oh right, because that's a girl?" He asked with a hard roll of his eyes.

"I'll have you know what you just faced today was a whole...well" Eddie leaned forward and whispered, "have you ever seen The Deadly Spawn?" He asked.

You burst into laughter, covering your mouth with both hands.

"That's mean!" you shouted between giggles.

"Yeah, well, she's mean. So it's perfectly fair, isn't it?" He hummed.

You shook your head.

"I've got to go... I'll see you on Monday." you said, walking past him to the driver's side of your car.

"Summer vacation starts next Tuesday you know, you think about coming to our show?" Eddie asked, holding your car door open for you.

You bit your lip, "I'd like to go" you thought to yourself.

"But.... Dad's probably got a schedule already planned out for me" you sighed mentally, already feeling drained from the thought of it.

As you looked up at him in silence, Eddie tilted his head back.

"Riiight, just tell me this," he said glancing about before lowering his voice.

"It's because of your old man right? And not because I sounded like a dying animal on stage today right?" he asked, voice fading from serious to playful as his eyes crinkled into a smile.

"Huh, no, no of course not you and the guys were great up there...." you said quickly from the seat of your car.

Eddie beamed, but it faltered as a worried glimmer filled your eyes and you looked away.

"But yes Dads...a little....wait -" You sent a concerned glance towards Eddie.

"How do you?" you asked voice trailing off.

"My Uncle works under your Dad, says most people aren't fond of him because he's a bit of a tight ass." Eddie said with a shrug.

"And between that and him not answering his own daughter's phone call in the middle of the night - past the middle of the night. It's not hard to piece up that the guy is a bit of an asshole...no offense." Eddie confessed.

"N-none taken." you stammered, sighing heavily as you started the car.

"It's not because of you or the band," you admitted quietly, turning to look at him.

You gave an apologetic smile, "all I can say is I'll try, and I want to go. But I can't promise anything, unfortunately."

"I'll take it," Eddie offered a smile and started backing away from your car, turning he could see his friends waiting for him near his Van across the parking lot.

 

You sat in your seat watching him go, heart pounding in your chest.

"You should thank him again....he saved you from at least total humiliation." you thought.

You shut your eyes tight, gripping the steering wheel so tightly your knuckles hurt.

"Just do it and regret it later," you told herself.

"Eddie?" you called out.

Eddie stopped, turning back around he looked at you with a question on his face, a giant smile quickly forming as you waved him over.

"You change your mind?" He asked, leaning down to the level of the window. 

You looked at him baffled, you planned on it being a quick thank you but he'd just ruined it.

"um...n-no, I just...." breahting became a struggle for you as you leaned around to the side of his face.

Eddie's eyes grew wide, and his heart skipped a beat.

It hardly felt as if your lips had touched him at all, but they left a lingering warmth on his right cheek.

"You're grinning like a fucking idiot, Munson." He told himself, but try as he might, he couldn't stop.

"Thank you again for the save today," you said, your words nearly rushing together as your eyes tried to look everywhere but at him.

Backing away from the window, Eddie gave a playful bow.

"Milady Tinúviel," He said, only causing your breath to lockup again.

"Whenever you need me." Eddie added dramatically, placing his right fist to his left shoulder, "If I can, I will." He said.

You cleared your throat and gave a nervous giggle

"You're a lot, Eddie." you said, shaking your head.

"I get that," he said, waving, "have a good weekend, McKinney." He called, finally heading back to his friends.

You rolled up your window and briefly covered your face, mentally screaming.

"You just did that." you thought to yourself, leaning back on the headrest. 

You tried to catch your breath before backing out of the parking lot.

Eddie tried to walk calmly back to his van, but once he'd seen you leave up the street, he nearly pranced over to his friends on the balls of his feet.

"Did you see that!" he cheered, nearly dancing in place, his hand held to his cheek. 

Gareth shook his head, "I can't believe your luck sometimes." He said, to which Eddie smirked.

Before heading home, you stopped at the old Creel Mansion. Going around back and slipping into the hidden entrance. Your eyes were wide as you looked around, while the place was no less dusty, it was certainly made more of a resting place.

A tent made of blankets and pillows had been stacked into a fort of sorts in one corner, a small fold-out table held a battery-powered radio, and the floor was littered with snack bags and pried open cans of food.

Amy sat in her fort, munching on Sardines. She watched you look around amazed, your eyes stuck on the flashlight hanging from the ceiling.

"Pretty neat, huh?" Amy said with pride.

"You're certainly...an old hat at this." you said quietly.

"And here I was worried." you exhaled, looking down at Amy.

Amy grinned and held out a bag of cheese puffs, "want some?" she asked.

You shook her head and knelt down on the ground.

"I can't" you mummbled.

Amy made a face, "What? Don't tell me you're allergic to cheese...that would be a sad affair." she said, tossing a puff into the air and catching it in her mouth.

You smiled faintly, "No, um..." you paused, you could tell Amy right? After all, who would she tell?

"I pissed my mom off last night, wasn't listening to one of her near-constant rants on how much of a disappointment I am and how amazing she used to be...." you sighed.

"So I'm not allowed to eat today until She deems I have learned my lesson." and with that, it was out there, the first person you'd ever told even a hint to.

Amy leaned her head back and scowled.

"Bullshit!" she called shoving the bag towards you.

"Go on, scarf it!" she said, "that bitch can't tell if you've eaten shit!" she raged.

You carefully handed her back the snack bag.

"Actually...you'd be surprised..." you sighed.

Amy snorted and laughed, "what? Does she smell your breath? Check your teeth for residue?" she joked.

You wanted to crawl into a hole at how ridiculous it all did sound.

"And my toothbrush bristles, backpack, and car for crumbs, wrappers, or condiment spills..." you explained.

Amy's mouth tumbled open as she leaned forward.

"Shit," she whispered.

"Shit! You're not kidding!" she gasped.

You shook your head and your stomach growled loudly.

"No, trust me, I'd kill that whole bag if I could." you sighed, getting to your feet.

"I came to check in on you, I should head back home, I'll try to come back tomorrow," you said, heading back to the window.

"Try not to get into too much trouble in your searching." you warned, before climbing out.

Back home, You trudged into your house. Entering the kitchen, where you found your mother waiting, clad in one of her beautifully made dress suits.

You could remember the days when you wanted to be just like her. 

Eleven years old and trying to fit into her high hills and jewelry. Often getting playfully chased around the house so that she might get her earrings back before it was time to leave for work.

The memory of that smile back then made the sneer on your mother's face now soul-crushing.

"I'm home," you spoke quietly, setting your backpack on the counter you slid it over to your Mother. With a skeptical glance, she started to rummage through the bag.

You bit your lip and watched. There shouldn't be anything in there, but the 'What if' was always nauseating. A crumb, a candy paper, a whiff of anything edible would mean another day to learn.

"It's clear, come here." your mother demanded, before you could move forward, her long fingers reached out and snatched your wrist, drawing a yelp from you as lunged forward.

"I w-was coming!" you shrieked.

"Don't talk back to me!" she growled, giving you a shake. 

Falling silent, you shut your eyes tightly, you didn't mean to speak out, it just flew from you.

The back of your mother's hand swatted your jaw, "open up," she demanded.

You opened your mouth wide, chin becoming pinched in your mother's grasp. You let her tilt your head around, looking at the back of your teeth.

Pushed away roughly by your face, you took frantic steps away from her.

"I didn't touch anything all day," you said quickly.

"It seems that way, I will be checking your car, later. For now, no dinner." your mother said.

You deflated but gave a nod.

"Yes Ma'am." you murmured, collecting your backpack and heading for the stairs.

On your way up you spotted Patrick coming down the stairs, He gave you a hard glare.

"W-what's wrong?" you asked.

"You are, why'd you embarrass me like that today?" He asked.

"I-" the air left your lungs.

"I didn't...that wasn't me, Chelsea made me - she's evil, Pat." you reasoned.

"Right, because you couldn't just not show up to the stupid thing? Or at least reject the dumb costume?" Patrick raged.

You blinked a few times, "he thinks it was a school event...." you thought.

"Pat it wasn't a real event! Nobody volunteered," you said, shaking your head. "Chelsea was getting revenge for-" 

You watched as Patrick shoved by you.

"I don't even care, I tried to tell dad, but big surprise! He didn't care. The McKinney princess just got praise for being so active in school...could hear him gushing about his 'sweet little girl' to his co-workers in the background." Patrick grumbled, continuing down the stairs.

With a huff of air, you looked about the stairwell baffled, frustrated tears started to well up. Taking a deep breath, you continued to your room.

You wanted to slam the door, to shout, but that would end badly. So, closing it as softly as you could, You dropped your bag and collapsed onto the bed.

Face down into the pillow, you hugged it, and let your mind scream for you.

The lights of your room flickered softly.

You could feel the spider's legs as they crawled onto your arms, and up your shaking shoulders. A startling amount that would prompt anyone to call and report an infestation.

But you don't fear the things that are gentle with you.

You shut your eyes

"So water?"

Eddie's voice echoed in your memory.

You opened your eyes,

"coming right up."

You heard.

Rolling carefully onto your back, you held the pillow to your chest, feeling the spiders crawl to safer places.

"Here you go."

His voice echoed.

You didn't know why that part of the memory was stuck in your head. But closing your eyes again you felt your rushing thoughts and heart rate slow.

A calm slowly seeped over you and before you knew it, sleep had taken its hold.

"____!"

Mr. McKinney's voice boomed from downstairs.

You jolted awake and hopped out of bed, quickly running down the hall and stairs, into the living room.

You stood straight with your eyes fixed on your father. Compared to your rigid posture he was completely relaxed, looking through a daily planner in his hands.

You clasped your hands behind your back. "Yes, Sir?" 

"Patrick told me about your show of school spirit today well done," He said, voice pleased while you inwardly cringed.

"School spirit? Try a personal hell." you thought.

"It went over well with the CEO, He's impressed that I could raise such a selfless young lady who would go as far as wearing a humiliating costume to show respect to those who've taken time out of their lives to help further her in life." He said with a smirk.

"Even if both you and I know, that's not entirely what happened, is it?" He snickered.

You remained silent. 

"Anyway, I have your schedule planned for the weekend." He started clearing his throat.

"Mr. Ford would like to see you again, and to...apologize for the behavior of his other dinner guest." He said.

You could feel the blood rush away from your limbs and face.

"Dinner guest?" you thought bitterly.

"Yes Sir...what time?" you asked.

"Sunday, night around ten pm." He answered, "Your dress is in the cleaners, you'll need to pick that up tomorrow as early as you can." 

You gave a nod, "yes sir." you droned.

"Tomorrow you will also be meeting with Pastor Alvin to discuss, helping with VBS this summer," said Mr. McKinney.

Your teeth sunk into your bottom lip.

"B-but...you said last year was my last year." you stammered, voice breaking. 

Mr. McKinney glanced up at you with eyes void of emotion as he slowly set down his planner.

"Now, now you owe Pastor Alvin a great deal. If not for him, we'd have never been pushed through your adoption process as fast as we were." He said.

"And He helped us prepare a space for you in our home, he baptized you, remember?" your father asked.

Bitter tears welled into your eyes.

"How could I forget." you whispered, your insides hurt just at the memory.

Swallowing hard, you tried to hold back your tears. 

"We have a lot to be grateful for, one more year won't kill you." He chuckled.

You looked down at your feet.

"Won't it?" you thought.

"The meeting won't be long, from there I need you to go out to and inspect Lover's lake for me for the next couple of days." He said.

"Lovers lake?" you questioned.

"Why yes, I was tasked to look over the area and find where would be a good place for a new project the plant wants to have built, a cooling system. However, I've not the time to handle it personally." He said.

"I don't know what makes a good place for-"

"I have a list prepared that will tell you what you are looking for." Mr. McKinney stated. 

You gave a feeble nod, "right...yes Sir." you sighed.

Your father reached for a plain gift bag sitting beside him.

"For handling the situation at the dinner as well as you did, Ford suggested I go out and get you a gift." your father sang.

Your eyes fell on the bag being held out before you with a hollow stare. Your fingers reluctantly reached out and took the handles from his hands. 

"Well, open it." He said, offering a conceited smile.

With soft rustling, you drew out a long silk and lace dress, held up by dainty straps, and floated on white soft tulle below.

What hurt more than anything was that it was the very same dress you had been looking at longingly earlier that year when Prom had come around.

You could remember standing before the dress store, daydreaming. you could see yourself in that dress as some faceless prince took to the dance floor with you.

And now the dream was horribly tainted. 

You tried to control your breathing as you clutched the dress.

It was hard to fight the tears this time.

"Don't worry, your arms and legs should be healed by the time you find a use for it." He said, causing your head to snap up in surprise.

"I've gotten you a longer dresses for your meetings." He said.

Before you could react, the front door slammed, the furious footsteps of your mother rushing in.

"You honestly thought I wouldn't find this?" She shrieked.

Startled, you turned around, wide eyes stuck on the empty bag of cookies in your mother's hands in confusion.

"What?" you asked.

"Don't act stupid, this came from your car!" your mother shouted.

you shook your head.

"No, it didn't - I don't even eat those things." you said, voice coming out in a whine as you backed away.

Your father watched the two of you with disinterest on his face.

"Yeah, well, you just bought yourself another four days." your mother mused with a snarling smile, tossing the wrapper onto the floor.

"I...I have dinner with Mr. Ford." you said, glancing back at your father for help.

"Oh...well, you'll have to kindly explain you've got a terrible stomach bug." She sang.

"Until you learn how to respect your mother, you will learn how to live like a child without one. Starved." She hissed.

You slipped your dress back into the bag.

"Yes Ma'am" you said, retreating into herself.

"Good, pick up the wrapper and to bed with you." your mother said.

You did as instructed quickly.

Watching you head up the stairs, Ms. McKinney turned a sharp eye to her husband.

"You see the things you push me to do?" she barked.

"Dear, it's not my fault you're a jealous old shrew, if you wanted a dress of your own you simply could ask." He muttered, collecting his things.

"It's not about the dress, Gregory!" She snapped, watching him walk off into the kitchen.

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[buckysgrace]

Thirty One

CW: Slight mention of self harm

“You’re up early,” Rosemary observed as she walked inside the living room, “What are you doing?” She looked at him curiously. Billy peered down towards her as he balanced on a step ladder. He wondered how she always looked so ready for the day this early. 

“Decorating,” Billy said simply, “They had these out at the store and I thought we could use them.” He replied as he continued to string up the orange lights around the curtain rod. He wasn’t used to decorating like this, but he figured that it was never too late to start. 

“I don’t think I’ve ever decorated the inside of the house before for Halloween,” She mused softly as she poured herself a cup of coffee, “It looks nice.” She brought the cup up towards her lips as she observed him. 

“You think so?” He asked as he climbed down the step ladder. He looked up at it, resting his hands on his hips as he fell into a deep thought. He had been unable to sleep again, taking a short nap of only two hours. He was sure that he had destroyed every single dust bunny within this house. He still felt like he needed to find something else to clean, to fix. It was driving him insane, so he worked on decorating instead. 

“Yeah,” Rosemary grinned, “You should hang this up in our closet when Sam is gone. I bet it’ll give him the heebie jeebies.” She laughed as she looked at one of the skeletons that had an eyeball that popped in and out of the socket. Billy thought about it for a moment as he joined her in the kitchen. 

“Is he a wimp like Kim?” He asked curiously, wondering if Kim had unknowingly gained another habit of Sam’s. Rosemary thought about it for a moment as she passed Billy a mug of coffee. He looked down at the liquid, suddenly thinking about the early mornings he’d had with Neil. They weren’t always terrible, at least he didn’t think so. 

Not quite that bad,” Rosemary said with a laugh, “I still feel bad about scaring her.” She replied as she pulled a carton of eggs from the fridge. Billy felt his nose curl as he watched her crack two of them into a pan before she put the carton back. 

“I think Max traumatized her,” Billy chuckled softly as he thought about the many times Max had jumped out and scared Kim,  “She loves that shit.” He nodded his head, thinking about how Max had stolen his previous Halloween mask last Halloween. 

“You know,” She told him as she flipped the egg effortlessly in the pan, “My parents thought that Halloween was for devil worshippers.” She said, her tone of humor as she spoke. Billy thought about it for a moment. He thought that he had heard of people thinking that way but had never really understood why. 

“Really?” Billy asked in interest, “Why?” He asked, trying to gain more insight into her parents. He couldn’t ever remember her speaking of them before, not even when he was little. All he could remember was his grandma Edith. 

“Oh lots of reasons,” Rosemary said as she grinned at him, “I just think they are crazy.” She wrinkled her nose as she spoke but looked fully serious at the same time. Billy tilted his head softly at her choice of words. 

“I thought your parents were dead.” He admitted a second later. He wasn’t sure why she would refuse to speak about them if they weren’t dead. Then again, she refused to tell Russell about Neil and Neil was very much still alive. 

“I don’t know if they are or not. I guess I don’t care to find out either,” She admitted as she buttered his toast for him, “They disowned me once they found out I was pregnant with you.” When she was finished she passed him a plate with the toast as she began to eat her egg. He picked a piece of the toast up as he considered her words.  

“They didn’t like dad?” He asked her softly, feeling like that had to be the answer to the question. He wondered how bad Neil was when he first got together with Rosemary. He wondered if that’s why Neil was so hard on him sometimes, because he reminded Neil of the woman he hated. It seemed probable at this point. 

“No, they didn’t mind him,” She said softly, “They didn’t like that we weren’t married. They were very self-righteous.” She shook her head as she continued to eat, looking like she was far away suddenly. He felt bad, sort of feeling like it was his fault. 

“Have you thought about talking to them before?” He asked as he finished his first piece of toast. He stared at the second one, but really didn’t feel like eating it. His appetite felt smaller than usual, but he figured it had to do with the lack of sleep. 

“Yeah, but not recently,” She replied wistfully, “After Russell was born, I thought that they might help me get you back. They just acted like they didn’t know me.” She laughed humorlessly, but he could clearly see the hurt that was hidden away in her blue eyes. He felt a wave of sadness crashing over himself suddenly as he felt more vulnerable than he had in a long time. 

“I’m sorry.” He told her seriously, still feeling like part of this was his fault. He wondered where she’d be in life if he was never born. He wondered if she would’ve stayed with Neil at all, or if she would’ve eventually found Sam and been happy with him. 

“I’m not,” She told him truthfully, “Even if they’re breathing, I buried them a long time ago.” She swatted her hand in the air, looking unbothered as she began to pick up her plate and the empty coffee cup. Billy took another sip of his, although he was beginning to feel like he didn’t need the extra caffeine.

“I think it would be hard to do that.” He admitted, feeling slightly like a hypocrite as he spoke. He knew that he had wished her dead a long time ago, thinking it would be easier to have her gone and out of his life. He wasn’t sure if he still wanted that anymore. She seemed to be genuine, no matter how hard he tried to deny that.  

“Perhaps,” She told him as she began to braid her hair back, “I guess it depends on the situation.” She said as she looked ahead, like she was trying to figure out what the situation was. He was suddenly curious for more information about her past, about what she’d done. 

“I never wanted to forgive you,” He told her a second later, “I don’t know if I really have. I’m just saying that maybe there’s still a chance for you guys.” He shrugged his shoulders, wondering if parents got better as they aged with time. He almost had to believe that it was true. 

“Maybe,” Rosemary smiled sweetly as she leaned forward to kiss his forehead, surprising him completely, “I’m glad that you’re giving us another chance.” She said quietly as a look of remorse crossed over her features again. Billy stared at her for a moment, his mind suddenly quiet from all thoughts. 

Billy didn’t have a chance to fully respond before Kim was dragging herself down the hallway. He felt his body straighten, his face brighten as he peered at her. She wore a simple white shirt that ended at her elbows and a bright blue skirt that brushed just above her knees. He admired her for a moment too long before he turned away, hoping that Rosemary hadn’t noticed. 

“Billy decorated,” Rosemary pointed out as she pulled another smile onto her lips, “Doesn’t it look nice?” She asked excitedly as she clasped her hands together. Kim blinked, looking like she had missed it completely as she turned to face the living room. 

“Oh wow,” Kim breathed out softly as her eyes scanned the decorations. Billy observed her, thinking that the orange lights created a nice glow in her eyes, “It looks incredible. You did a good job.” She smiled sweetly as she turned to face him. He felt his heart beating roughly inside of his chest, beating so hard that it might explode. 

“Thanks.” Billy responded as gripped a hold of the table, trying to keep himself anchored so he didn’t rush forward to kiss her. He had a sudden desire to make her feign being sick so she could stay with him. 

“I’m going to grab my purse and then we can go, alright?” Rosemary asked her as she glanced up towards Kim. Kim nodded her head, her eyes following as Rosemary left the room before she approached Billy. 

“What are you doing today?” Kim asked, glancing around before she leaned forward to kiss his lips. He grinned against the motions, suddenly forgetting what he had been thinking about. His mind had felt so full and vast this morning, his thoughts racing so badly that he had been unable to sleep. He felt another fresh surge of energy despite all the heavy lifting he’d done yesterday. 

“I thought about going for a jog, then maybe lift some weights,” Billy replied as he pushed his hair out of his face, “Do you think I should get a haircut?” He asked suddenly as he tilted his head. She looked at him taken aback. 

“What?” She searched for clarity as she looked over his features, like she couldn’t understand why he’d think that. He didn’t necessarily want to cut it, but he felt like a change in something would be nice. 

“Like cut it shorter?” He asked her again, wanting to know what she thought first. He didn’t want to cut it if she didn’t like it shorter. 

“No,” She told him truthfully as she ran her fingers through it, “I like the mullet.” She looked at him gently as her lips curled into a smile. The motions of her smile felt like it dug right through his flesh and landed directly in his chest. 

“Are you ready, Kim?” Rosemary asked, snapping Billy out of his thoughts again as he turned to look at Rosemary. She was smiling, looking anything but suspicious as Kim dropped her hand from his hair. 

“Yeah,” Kim squeaked out softly, “See you later.” She replied to Billy, looking like she wanted to say more before she turned on her heels and headed out with Rosemary. Rosemary wrapped an arm around her waist, giving her a soft squeeze before she was guiding Kim out and leaving Billy to himself.

He paused for a moment, his leg bouncing against the stool as he thought of where to begin next. He needed to do something to keep his mind occupied before everyone else woke up a few hours later. 

He started with refolding all of Rosemary’s quilts, before he inevitably decided it would just be good for him to start on his work out. His muscles still slightly burned from yesterday and moving all of the heavy furniture, but by the time he was done with his weights he was sure that he would be unbearably stiff tomorrow.

He worked next on organizing the garage, which didn’t take too long. They didn’t have a lot placed into the garage. Most of it was tubs of old items and lots of pictures that he assumed had to be Rosemary’s. He discovered she had a full photobook reserved for him when they’d visit the beach, but he neglected to look into it.

He found himself in the kitchen a little later, feeling like he could start on breakfast or something for them as they usually started to get up around this time. He felt like he was too jittery, full and alive and he had nothing to do with all this energy and motivation. It was like it was bubbling underneath his skin, still threatening to burst free. 

He could feel the pressure building in his skin, feeling so tight like it might explode. He felt like something was wiggling down deep beneath his skin, something that he was unable to see. He gripped the knife in his free hand, his thoughts on the edge of turning darker as he began to wonder if he could slice the jittery feelings free. 

“What are you making?” Max asked as she walked into the kitchen. Billy quickly dropped the knife, shaking his thoughts away. He turned to face her, noticing the inquisitive look on her features. 

“I don’t know yet,” He admitted as he turned from the knives, “What do you want?” He asked her, feeling a little excited that he was needed for something. She stretched out for a moment, her short hair wild and unruly from the sleep she’d just woken from. 

“An egg sandwich is fine with me,” Max said curiously as she sat down at the counter. He wrinkled his nose but did as she said, “Did you do all of this?” She asked as she jerked her hand towards the living room. He nodded his head, still feeling proud of what he’d done. “Yeah,” Billy grinned as he began to crack some eggs into the still hot pan, “I got a few masks for you too. I figured you’d want to go as something weird.” He told her honestly. He half expected her to go as Michael Myers again, but then decided it would be cool if she had something different to wear. 

“Thanks,” She said softly as she leaned over the counter to watch him, “Have you been feeling okay?” She asked casually, her blue eyes turning inquisitive. He felt a fresh wave of anger hit him suddenly, punching him so hard that he was speaking before he realized it. 

“Yes,” He snapped back before he inhaled deeply. Billy closed his eyes for a moment, growing a little frustrated with everyone that kept asking him that question, “I’m fine. Do you want it sunny side up?” He asked a little softer, feeling bad that he had snapped so quickly. It was like his emotions were running unchecked. 

“Uh sure,” Max nodded her head a second later, “That sounds fine with me.” She shrugged her shoulders as she tilted her head, still looking at him confused. The kitchen was suddenly loud as Russell raced his way inside, catching himself as he leaned up against the counter. Billy served Max her plate before he began to make one for Russell as well. 

“Can we work on Kim’s car again?” Russell asked eagerly, already bouncing up and down with energy. Billy wondered if Russell felt like this all the time. He looked at him, noticing how the bruise around his eye was darker. His lip looked better, however. 

“Maybe,” Billy responded quickly, “I wonder if she’d just like to get a new one.” He said quietly, more so to himself than anyone else. He had enough money to get her a car, but couldn’t think straight enough to really understand if she’d want that or not. 

“What?” Russell looked at him confused, “But dad just bought that one.” He tilted his head, still looking like he couldn’t understand Billy’s thoughts. Billy shrugged as he pushed a sandwich towards him. 

“It was just a thought,” Billy sighed, “Are you guys getting ready to go?” Max simply shrugged her shoulders again as she looked down at her plate. Billy didn’t know why he even bothered assembling a sandwich when she was currently working on taking it all apart and eating it one by one. 

“Almost,” Russell grinned as he walked around in the living room and pulled forth a large display, “Did you see my volcano I’m working on?” He asked, pointing it out dramatically so Billy couldn’t miss it. He nodded his head, sending Russell a little impressed look. 

“Neat,” Billy responded as he looked at the mess that was scattered along the display, “Do you get to blow it up?” He asked him curiously as he leaned against the counter. He wasn’t sure why he felt so social suddenly, but he had an urge to talk about all of the science projects he’d done over the years as well. 

“Not yet,” Russell peeped up nervously, “I get to at my science fair in a few weeks. Will you come?” He asked hopefully, his blue eyes wide as he rocked back and forth on his feet. Billy glanced at him then at the volcano again. 

“When is it?” He asked softly as he remembered all the times he’d hopefully asked Neil to join him at sports games, only to get shut down every time. He wasn’t sure that Russell had ever experienced that before, but Billy felt like he couldn’t be the one to start it. 

“After Halloween, before Thanksgiving,” Russell shrugged his shoulders as he set it down, “I’ll have to check the date again.” He said slowly, like he thought the answer might suddenly appear to him. 

“Sure,” Billy nodded his head, “I think I can go.” He told him casually as he began to scrub the hot pan clean. He glanced over his shoulder, examining the smile that grew ear to ear on Russell’s face. 

“Are you kids ready?” Sam asked as he walked from the hallway. Billy didn’t quite understand how Sam worked so much, but then maybe he did. He figured he’d also work all the time if all he could think about was drinking. 

“Yeah,” Max responded as she leaned backwards to give Sam a tight hug, “Are we doing anything after?” She asked him curiously as she looked up towards him. Sam smiled as he brought his hand down on her messy hair. 

“Rosemary said something about going shopping if you want to,” Sam offered gently, “Otherwise I suppose we could do something else. Like go skating for a bit?” He suggested, looking quite happy as a smile broke onto Max’s lips. 

“I’d like that,” She said honestly as she stood up quickly, “Let’s get this over with then.” She said eagerly as she yanked on Sam’s hand, trying to pull him further and further towards the door. He laughed as he sent Billy a small wave, signaling their farewell.

“Can I get my own skateboard?” Russell began to ask Sam curiously as they headed out the front door. Billy paused for a moment as the silence in the house kicked in, almost swallowing him completely. 

He began to scrub at the dishes that had been used, but that still wasn’t enough to keep his jittery feelings at bay. His mind was racing again and he knew there was no point in staying here. He decided he’d go for a run, perhaps burn off all the extra energy that was lingering deep inside of him. 

He pushed his hair up into a blue scrunchie, not really caring who saw him with it in his hair at this point. He set off quickly, but also tried to keep himself in place so he didn’t look like a mad man. He enjoyed the feeling of the sun hitting down against his body, like the rays were gently kissing his skin. 

“Stupid motherfucker,” A girl cursed, roughly dragging her bike to the side of her as she pushed it up the hill, “Piece of shit.” She continued to curse as Billy jogged past her. He paused for a moment before he turned towards her, watching the way she blew a messy strand out from her forehead. 

“Need help?” Billy asked as he began to jog backwards, “What happened?” He asked curiously, listening to the odd sound her bike was making as she continued to push it up the hill. She looked up at him irritated, her dark eyes flashing. She was clearly overdressed, apparently not expecting the morning to be so hot. 

She straightened out a little bit, her skin was a soft brown that nearly looked golden in the sun. Her outfit was darker, slightly too baggy for her slim frame. She raised her eyebrows, looking like she didn’t know why he was still there. 

“My stupid tire is jacked up,” She huffed out as she continued to push it up the hill, “I’ll figure it out.” She brushed him off, sending him another odd look as she continued to heave it up the hill. Billy stopped his movements, not caring to see her struggle with it anymore. 

“I can fix it,” He told her eagerly, “I don’t live far away either.” He told her honestly as he gestured down to the edge of the street. She watched where he gestured, still looking quite uncertain.

“Do you live there alone?” She looked at him inquisitively, like she was trying to figure out what he wanted. He had no plans on doing anything wrong, he just thought that it would be good to help. 

“No, I live with my mom and her husband,” He told her honestly, “And my sister and brother.” He mumbled underneath his breath, feeling like it was best to keep Kim in her own separate category. He took the bike from her easily, lifting it up with one hand as he turned back towards the house. 

“Okay,” She spoke in confusion as she jogged to keep up with him, “You’re not trying to steal my bike?” She asked him, sounding a little worried at that thought. He glanced down at her bike, noticing that the red paint was chipped and slowly fading away. 

“I have a car, why would I need this old thing?” He pointed out happily, motioning towards the blue beauty that was growing closer and closer. He wondered if he should was his car later. That would probably buy him some time. 

“Thanks,” She muttered underneath her breath, “I appreciate it.” She continued to struggle to keep up for a moment before she finally fell in line with him. She stood at his eye level, basically the same height as him as he began to walk up towards the garage. 

He punched in the code to it before he waited for it to slowly open. Once it was up high enough he ducked his head down and made his way inside, searching for the tool box that he had moved earlier. He hummed to himself, before realizing that it was oddly quiet within the garage. 

“What are you doing?” He questioned her, tilting his head as he peered at how far away she was standing. Her dark eyes glazed over him, narrowing like she was trying to see if he was hiding something. 

“Trying to figure out if you’re trying to kill me.” She admitted slowly, speaking softly like she’d realized she shouldn’t have shared that information. Billy felt his eyebrow raise as he began to position her bike in the correct way. 

“If I was going to kill you would I take you to my house?” He asked her as he tried to keep a snort at bay. He couldn’t really see what was odd about this situation. He was just trying to be friendly, to be polite. 

“I don’t know,” She said slowly, “You’re very odd.” She moved a little closer, one slow step at a time like she was trying to test the waters. Billy innocently held up a wrench, waving it so she could see it clearly before he began to mess with the chain on her bike. 

“Thanks,” Billy responded dryly, “Just sit down while I fix your damn bike.” He told her seriously, rolling his eyes this time as he started to work on it. His mind was still buzzing despite his actions and his skin was beginning to feel tighter and tighter. He inhaled deeply, trying to keep his emotions at bay for a few minutes longer. 

“You’ve done this before?” She asked him curiously as she joined him on the floor. She crossed her legs as she began to push her messy curls from her forehead again. He nodded his head slowly before he answered. 

“My sister is reckless with her bike,” Billy answered truthfully, thinking about the many times he had fixed Max’s, “This won’t take long. Where are you heading?” He pondered for a moment. She paused, looking like she was unsure if she should tell him the truth or not. 

“I was trying to head to work.” She admitted a second later, clearly looking a little more relaxed. Billy nodded his head, unsure of why he was so desperate for some sort of conversation. He never minded being alone before, but something about today felt different. 

“What do you do?” He asked as he finished adjusting the chain. He spun the front wheel for a minute, checking to see if there were any visible holes or tears within the rubber. “I’m a tattoo artist, well, almost.” She said quickly, looking a little excited as she held her elbows over her knees. Billy stopped for a second, wondering if her art was any better than Dakota’s. 

“Do you know Dakota?” Billy paused as he tried to remember what her last name was, “I think Barnes is her last name.” He said slowly, hoping that he was getting it right. She was sort of hard to miss. Loud and brash and a little too overbearing. She was always in Billy’s space, but he didn’t think she meant anything bad by it. She just seemed oblivious, or so he hoped. 

“You act like this is a small town,” She laughed before she nodded her head in agreement, “I do know her though, I think. We have art realism together.” She moved her hands this time, clasping them together over her knees. 

“She’s not too bad.” Billy said a second later, although he barely knew her. Tommy seemed fairly interested in her, but Billy had a feeling that she had something going on with Chet. 

“She’s not a bad person,” She said quickly, “I would not let her tattoo me.” She said a little softer, smiling sheepishly like she was saying something bad. Billy nodded his head in agreement before he began to air her tire up.

“She’s pretty awful,” Billy replied with a laugh, “What’s your name? I’m Billy.” He introduced himself before he looked at her curiously, realizing that he hadn’t even bothered to ask. She shifted on the ground. “Alma,” She said as she sent him a wave, “How do I repay you?” She asked him, tilting her head as she peered at her bike as he set it back into its normal position. 

“I have a girlfriend so nothing like that.” He muttered underneath his breath, suddenly hoping that he hadn’t given her the wrong idea. She gaped, drawing his attention back towards her. 

“Jesus,” Alma’s features scrunched up, “I didn’t mean it like that.” She snapped at him, shaking her head like she couldn’t believe he’d said that. He smiled sheepishly, not bothering to mention that he had been offered that before. 

“You said you do tattoos?” Billy asked, “Can you get me in today? I can pay.” He told her eagerly, feeling like there was suddenly a hole burning in his pocket. He could clearly picture what he wanted. 

“I’m still an apprentice,” Alma warned him, “But I guess if that’s what you want.” She shrugged her shoulders, like she couldn’t see why it was such a bad idea. He felt a large grin forming on his lips as excitement bubbled inside of him. 

“I do,” Billy responded eagerly, “I can give you a ride there.” He promised her, thinking of how surprised Kim would be when she saw it. 

///////////////////////

“Hey,” Kim grinned as she walked into his room. She paused before she slowly rested against his right side, her fingertips narrowly avoiding his new tattoo, “What did you do today, handsome?” She teased him as she leaned forward to kiss his cheek. He breathed in her scent for a moment, thinking that she smelt extra sweet today. Perhaps, it had to do with the icing on her tongue. 

He started to speak, trying to explain his story of what happened today but then realized he was speaking too fast. Kim’s eyes widened as they danced over his features, her eyebrows knitted in confusion as she tried to keep up. He paused, giving himself a second to sort out the story within his mind as it kept racing through his head, “I fixed this girl's bike and I got a tattoo.” He summarized it as best as he could.

His skin no longer felt like it was threatening to pop and burst everywhere. He supposed he should’ve clarified that he’d gotten two tattoos, but the one on his right side against his ribs. The tattoo on his left hand was smaller, just a geometric shape that traced from his thumb up to his index finger. 

“You got a tattoo?” She looked at him surprised before a smile grew on her lips. He admired the curve of her mouth for a split second, feeling like he was so lucky to be able to kiss her lips and have her all to his own. 

“Do you want to see it?” He asked excitedly, feeling like he was bouncing with excitement as bad as Russell would. She nodded her head and Billy didn’t wait any longer before he was pulling his shirt up over his head. He gestured towards it, unable to fully reach it on his own without looking in a mirror. 

“Sure,” Kim grinned, looking excited as she slowly peeled the tape back to expose the ink, “Billy. Oh my God. What is this?” She was stunned, her voice nearly sounding horrified as she stared at the ink again. He felt a little panicked, wondering if Alma had messed up on something that he’d missed. 

“You don’t like it?” He turned in concern, looking in the mirror as he faced away from Kim. He couldn’t see what was wrong with it. The drawing of a girl was sitting with her knees together, her longs dangling as she rested her cheek up against her shoulder. Her hair was thick and long, a deep red. He thought it looked nice. 

“Is that supposed to be me?” She squeaked out softly, her cheeks beginning to turn pink as Billy turned to face her again. He paused for a moment, unsure of how he was supposed to answer her question when she was reacting this way. 

“Is it a bad thing if I say yes?” He asked her seriously, trying to keep his shoulders from slumping as he pushed the bandage back over his skin. He jolted a bit, wincing softly at the sore area he’d pressed on. 

“No,” She responded quickly as her face turned scarlet, “But what will your mom say?” She asked him softly as she stepped forward to gently rub the tape down against his skin again. He grinned as he looked towards her. 

“She won’t see it,” Billy reassured Kim, “Or maybe she’ll think it’s some other hot redhead.” He teased her as he leaned forward to gently press his lips against hers. She moved her lips against his softly, her cheeks feeling warm from how red they were. 

“Oh my God,” Kim squeaked out as she traced her fingertips along the tape again, “What has gotten into you?” She smiled softly as she looked up at him, suddenly looking a little pleased with herself. 

“I’m just happy,” Billy grinned as she leaned forward to peck her lips repeatedly, “So happy.” He mumbled against her lips, leaning forward to deepen the kiss a little bit. He slid his tongue against her mouth, desperate to feel more of her against him suddenly. 

“Mhm,” Kim grinned against his mouth, “They did a good job on it.” She told him shyly, looking like she wasn’t sure how to compliment the design. He chuckled softly as he pushed a strand of her hair behind her ear. 

“Yeah?” Billy grinned at her, “Maybe I need to get another one.” He said teasingly as he held his hand out towards her. Her eyes widened as she looked at it. She gently wrapped her nimble fingers around his palm as she observed the area for a second, like she was trying to build the confidence to look at it. 

“God,” Kim breathed in deeply as she slowly pulled the wrapper back. She sighed in relief a second later, making Billy laugh. He had considered getting her eyes on his body much too late into his session. He wished he would’ve brought a picture of her, “I thought it might be my boobs or something.” She teased him.

“I could do that,” He encouraged her with a bright smile, “I should pin up your nude photos.” He said a second later, figuring that this was his room and he could do what he wanted. Neil never said anything about having pictures of models up in bikinis, but he somehow figured that Sam wouldn’t be too happy about it. 

“No,” She replied before he was finished speaking, her cheeks burning brightly, “That still sounds like a terrible idea.” She shook her head, like she could somehow shake the thoughts from his mind. 

“I can’t help that I'm crazy about you.” He told her truthfully, feeling like she was on his mind all the time. She felt similar to his favorite album, the one he couldn’t stop playing. He could think about her constantly and never grow bored. 

“Maybe you’re just crazy,” She teased as she leaned forward to press her lips against his nose, “Come on. They were asking about you.” She urged him softly, giving his fingertips a slight squeeze before she slowly backed out of the room. She grinned at him, her face lighting up brightly before she slipped out the door. 

Billy chewed on his bottom lip, hiding his own grin as he slipped his shirt on over his head and followed her back down the hall. He peered around curiously, noticing that Max and Russell were lounged out on the couch, passing his controller back and forth for whatever game he was playing.

Billy peeked out the glass doors, trying not to roll his eyes as he noticed Sam and Rosemary sitting near his little garden. He wasn’t sure how they could be so passionate about gardening of all things. 

“Max,” Kim grumbled as she pulled her notebook out, “What did you do? Don’t mess with my homework.” She told her quickly, looking a little horrified as she scanned the pages. 

“Why would I mess with your homework?” Max asked in irritation, snapping her head around quickly before she turned her attention back towards the TV. Billy leaned against one of the chairs as he watched Kim shake her head in dismay. 

“It was me,” Billy said a second later, “I thought I would help out.” He added slowly, unsure if he had really helped now by the look on Kim’s features. She was clearly surprised as she held her notebook tightly in her hands. 

“You did my math homework?” Kim questioned as she walked towards him. She looked up from her notebook curiously, tilting her head like she couldn’t understand why he’d done it. He shrugged his shoulders, knowing that he had spent much of the night desperate to get his mind off of things. 

“Yeah, why not?” He asked as he tugged softly on the tablecloth, “I didn’t have anything else to do. Is it wrong?” He questioned her in worry, feeling like he’d ruined his chance at helping her. She shook her head rapidly, looking a little alarmed at his brash tone. 

“No, it’s right,” She reassured him quickly, “Your handwriting just looks different.” She mumbled, more to herself before she closed the notebook quickly. She examined it for a while before she looked back up at him, her features still knitted together in confusion. She sent him a soft, reassuring smile that quickly calmed the way his chest was beginning to race in panic. 

“What did you get?” Max asked, holding her hand out lazily as Billy began to walk by. He stopped, letting her roughly pry the tape back as she examined the black ink, “That’s cool.” She shrugged her shoulders quickly before she dropped his hand again.

“I like it,” Russell spoke up a second later, averting his eyes from Max as he inspected the design on Billy’s hand, “It’s really awesome.” He added to Max’s sentence, looking a little proud of himself.

“Thanks.” Billy drew out softly as he plopped himself down next to Kim. She smiled softly, although her eyes were a little wide as she placed some distance between the two of them. He tried to keep from grumbling as he watched her, sure that she was beginning to act weird. 

He inspected her, trying to figure out if he’d done something wrong or if she was really uncomfortable with the tattoo he’d gotten of her. He thought that was a silly thought though. Alma had just drawn a pinup girl that was similar to Kim’s looks, it was nothing that was done based off of a picture. 

“Jesus,” Billy couldn’t take it anymore as he placed his hand on top of Russell’s to stop the annoying movements, “Can you stop that, please?” He questioned him, snapping a little harsher than he’d realized. The room was suddenly quiet. 

“Sorry,” Russell flushed suddenly, “It’s just a habit.” He squeaked out, his blue eyes wide like he hadn’t expected Billy to react in that way. Max shot Billy a look of disbelief, but Billy couldn’t function because of the irritation that had grown inside of him. 

“It’s fine,” Kim leaned over Billy to give Russell’s hand a soft squeeze, “Did you tell Billy about the odd couple that came in today?” She questioned, looking up at Billy amused as she continued to lay over his lap for a brief second. 

He observed her features for a second, noticing the confusion that was lingering in the crevices of her eyebrows as he slowly relaxed. He leaned back in the seat, unsure of why he’d suddenly grown so angry. He felt better as a soft relief filled him while Russell began to fill Billy in on the bakery drama. 

/////////////////////

“You know what we should do,” Billy said suddenly as he glanced towards Kim, laying on the side of her bed as the night sky grew darker and darker, “Get married.” He told her seriously, keeping his eyes peeled to her features so he could tell what she thought about his grand idea. 

“What?” Her hazel eyes were wide in disbelief as a stunned expression grew over her features. She opened her mouth, then shut it again like she still couldn’t believe what she had said. 

“Why not?” He asked her quickly, “We love each other.” He stated, feeling like this would be the proper thing to do. He thought that things would be a lot better if they were married. She slowly relaxed as she moved a little closer to him. 

“Your mom doesn’t know first of all,” Kim laughed as she held onto his hands, “And where would we get married at?” She questioned him, looking just as serious as she asked the question. He ponder about it for a moment. 

“The courthouse.” He said simply, wondering if they could sneak down there tonight and get it over with. He supposed that it was probably too late and that they would have to wait for the morning sun to rise before they could do it. 

“What would I wear?” She asked him, her question full of humor as she held onto his eye contact. He tucked her hair behind her ear, gently stroking her cheek as he admired her features. He thought that she could wear anything and be pretty in it. 

“What’s wrong with what you’re wearing now?” He asked her seriously as he took in her polka dotted nightgown. Kim slightly pouted her lip out, shaking her head in a playful disbelief. 

“I want a wedding dress,” She said at last, “One that’s got the puffy shoulders and is big and white. I want to look like a princess.” She told him eagerly, her eyes flashing like she’d thought about this for a long time. He paused, realizing that she probably had spent a long time planning it out. He wasn’t surprised at her wanting to look like a princess, not one bit. 

“You always do,” He grinned as he pulled her into his lap, “Let’s just go buy one and then we can go to the courthouse.” He rubbed her hips softly, watching the way her nightgown crept up higher and higher along her smooth thighs. He tried to bury the image of his head between them, but could feel his cock stirring at the thought. 

“With what money?” She asked him playfully, still laughing like he was suggesting something ridiculous. She played with his hair gently, while he turned towards her seriously. 

“I can use my check.” He stated as he nodded his head. She observed him for a long second, like she just realized that he was being completely serious. He didn’t think there was anything funny about what he’d just suggested to her. 

“Can we like-,” She paused for a second, “Think this out first?” She gestured with her hands as she sat back on his lap, suddenly looking a little panicked like she had approached this whole situation wrong. 

“What’s there to think about?” He asked her seriously, “It’s a great idea.” He pulled her a little closer, wishing that there was a way to share his thoughts with her. He struggled with words, but he knew that this was a good idea.

She rubbed her hands up and down his bicep gently, looking like she was trying to figure out the best way to approach this subject. She was quiet as she held onto his skin, chewing on her bottom lip as she turned to look at him again. 

“I want to marry you,” She replied gently as she pressed her fingertips against his, “But I think we need to figure out other things first. Like how to tell your mom. What if they don’t want us to live with them once we’re married? What if she won’t let us be together?” She explained gently, drawing out her words slowly so he could better understand what she meant. He felt a frown forming on his lips, feeling like she may be acting a little ridiculous. 

“She has no authority over anything I do.” He told Kim sternly as he thought about Rosemary. He didn’t care if she had issues with them or not. He was happy and he knew Kim was happy. That’s all that mattered in his mind. 

“I know, I know,” Kim whispered softly, trying to bring his tone down, “I’m just saying we don’t have to rush it.” She scooted forward a bit to grip his face lightly. She squished his face in her hands, grinning softly like she was trying to make him feel better. 

“Is it because I haven’t bought you a ring? Because I can buy one right now.” He told her seriously. He furrowed his eyebrows together, wondering if he should’ve grabbed a ring instead of a bracelet the other day. 

“I think-,” Kim paused again, looking like she was searching for the right thing to say, “That maybe you’re not thinking straight.” She breathed out slowly, looking a little worried as she rubbed her thumbs into his skin. He felt himself sinking back against the bed in confusion. 

“I’ve never thought better than what I have right now,” He told her in defense of himself, knowing that his mind wasn’t jumbled, “My thoughts are free and I’m free.” He said quickly as he gestured towards himself. 

“Are you okay?” She observed him curiously, her hazel eyes flashing as she watched him intensely. She looked worried, like there really was something wrong. He suddenly felt on edge, not enjoying the way she seemed to be analyzing him. He leaned back again, not understanding what could be so wrong about his behavior.  

“Yeah,” Billy looked at her confused, “Why do you ask?” He tilted his head, trying to understand what the problem was. Kim hesitated, looking like she was torn to bring the subject up for a moment. He nudged her thighs softly with his fingers, wanting to draw the words from her lips. 

“You seem like you’re on edge,” Kim said finally as she observed his features, “Did you take more mushrooms?” She asked him softly, curiously like she was worried about what the answer would be. He shook his head, thinking that she was too paranoid. 

“No,” He laughed, “You said not to take anymore, remember?” He teased her as he rubbed his fingertips across her skin. In all honesty, he hadn’t taken any drugs since that night. He was just being more of himself, which he didn’t think was wrong. 

“I do,” She nodded her head, “You just seem different.” She looked worried as she spoke up again, still looking like she was afraid of how he’d react. He tried to hide his offense, because he knew this was who he really was. She hadn’t seen this part of him enough. 

“I’m happy,” Billy replied briskly, “Is that a crime?” He asked her quickly as he dropped his hands from her sides. Her eyes widened as she shook her head quickly, like she was trying to do damage control. 

“I didn’t mean that,” She reassured him quickly, “I just wanted to make sure you’re okay and that there's nothing else going on.” She said urgently as she brought his hands back up towards his lips. He relaxed a second later, grinning as he squeezed at her flesh again. 

“I am,” He told her seriously as he leaned forward to kiss her lips slowly, “I am very okay.” He mumbled against her lips, sighing deeply at the scent of her that lingered in the air. He gave her lips another soft peck before he pulled away. 

“Alright,” She grinned as she rubbed her fingertips across his cheeks, “I’m glad you’re okay.” She nodded her head softly as she began to trace her fingers across his skin. He leaned into her touch, enjoying how she felt against his skin. 

He leaned forward, breathing in the sweet taste of her mouth before he brought his lips upon hers again. He kissed her feverishly, like he’d never kiss her again. His mind raced at the thought of losing her, his heart aching as he pressed his lips even harder to her mouth. She moaned softly in response, her back pressing up against the wall as she struggled to keep up with his actions.  

She pulled away first, breathing hard as she rested her forehead against his. He sighed softly, leaning forward again to lick at her glossed lips. The desire to feel her grew deeper and deeper as he traced his fingers down her soft sides. She was sweeter than candy, more addictive than the cigarettes he smoked. 

“Do you want to go to mass with me?” He asked suddenly, speaking the idea out loud as soon as the thought popped into his head. Kim looked at him curiously, her cheeks still pink from how roughly they’d been kissing. 

“Mass?” She paused as she rolled off of his lap, “Like church?” She asked, sounding a little unsure as she watched him. He nodded his head a second later, thinking about how she’d never been before. 

“Yeah,” He grinned, “I figured you could try it and see how you like it.” He reasoned with her as he brought her fingertips up to his mouth and began to pepper kisses along them. She smiled softly for a second before she pulled away. 

“I don’t know,” She looked away from him, “I guess if you want to go.” She shrugged her shoulders softly. Billy paused for a moment, clearly able to tell that she wasn’t that comfortable with the idea. 

“I’m asking if you want to go.” He clarified for her as he shifted on the bed so he could face her better. She tilted her head back and forth as she ran the thought through her mind again. 

“Next Sunday is the day after the Halloween party,” She reminded him, “Are you going to be able to wake up?” She teased him softly as she moved in a little closer. He grinned as he kissed her soft nose. 

“Of course,” He grinned as he pulled away from her, “The real question is if you’ll be able to wake up.” He told her seriously, thinking about how she liked to sleep in. Then again, her sleeping schedule still seemed to be fucked. Just not as nearly bad as what his sleeping habits currently were. 

“Is that what you were doing this morning? Praying?” She asked him as she tilted her head in confusion. He thought about it for a moment, nearly forgetting that it had happened before he nodded his head. He realized she must’ve been up far earlier than he had thought, as he had done that in his room. 

“Yeah, you know I was thinking about those dreams that you have,” He rambled for a moment as he tried to get his thoughts concise and clear, “Do you think they’re demons?” He tilted his head in wonder, suddenly feeling uneasy as he brought his feet up from off the floor. 

“Demons?” Kim looked at him baffled, like she wasn’t understanding what he was saying. He thought for a moment, trying to think of the best way to explain his own thoughts. 

“Like because you never really went to church and because of what we do,” He said a second later, “Do you think we’re being punished for it?” He asked her seriously, suddenly feeling worried. He’d never felt shame about their relationship before, but the thought of God watching them suddenly made him nervous. 

“No,” She shook her head quickly, “I never thought of it that way, but I’m sure that’s not what it is.” She said softly, looking like she was a little fearful over the thought. Billy paused as he rocked himself back and forth. 

“Why not?” He questioned her seriously. He didn’t mean to push the issue, but he really was curious to know what her thoughts were. He was fairly certain that if she repented, if they both did, that these issues would go away. 

“Because there’s worse people that haven’t been punished.” She said at last, looking at him seriously. He held his hands together as the words washed over him. He nodded his head in agreement, realizing that she was right. Not that he would really argue with her, she looked fairly stern in her answer. He had a feeling she had no desire to discuss the issue any further.

“That’s true,” He agreed a second later, suddenly feeling reassured, “I forgot about that.” He admitted softly as he scratched at his chin. He felt a sense of relief, but feared that he’d lose it if he lost focus of her. 

“Billy,” She leaned forward a little bit as she held her palms against her knees, “I want to ask you something but I don’t want you to get upset.” She admitted at last, taking him a bit by surprise. He nodded his head, not wanting her to hide her thoughts from him out of fear of him growing angry. 

“Okay,” He said slowly as he watched her curiously, “What is it?” He asked softly as he pulled her hands over to his lap. He played with her fingers softly, rubbing his nails gently against her palms. She lowered her voice as she leaned towards him. 

“Are you taking something?” She whispered cautiously, “I know we didn’t discuss it much before but if you’re having problems with drugs, I can help.” She linked their fingers together, squeezing softly as she looked at him. He moved his head back a soft, feeling a little offended that she would suggest a thing. 

“I’m not taking any drugs,” He said roughly, snapping harder than what he should've. He didn't think it was lying at the moment, because he really hadn't taken any drugs. She wasn't asking for specifics and that was fine with him, “I’m fine. I feel relaxed and free. I’ve never been this happy before.” He told her quickly, still wishing there was an easier way to explain this to her. She sighed deeply as she nodded her head, looking a little relieved as she brought his hand up to her lips this time. 

“It just changed so fast,” She smiled slowly, “I just want to make sure you’re okay.” She repeated the words from earlier as she softly nuzzled her head against his hand, careful to avoid the area that was sore. 

“Do I look like something is wrong?” He teased her softly, smiling brightly as he could assure her that he was fine. She bit her lip softly as she leaned even closer to him. 

“You’re just not acting yourself,” She mumbled as she cupped his face gently in her hands, “And I want to make sure you know you can talk to me.” She said a second later before she delivered a kiss to his nose. He wrinkled it softly as he nodded his head. He felt slightly guilty as he knew he had been lying to her. He supposed this could be considered a fresh start. 

“You can talk to me too,” He pointed out a little harsher, “You came home drunk the other night after being with your friends.” He told her truthfully as he thought about it. Her eyes widened and her face flushed, like she hadn’t expected him to know. He didn’t mind, nor was he mad about it. But she had clearly tried to keep it a secret.

“I had a few drinks,” She admitted, “Is that wrong?” She asked him honestly, looking like she truly didn’t know the answer to that question. He suddenly felt bad for confronting her about the situation. 

“No,” He told her quickly, “But you act like it’s a bad thing.” He told her truthfully. She paused as she thought about it, looking like she didn’t know how to handle his statement. 

“You saw how my dad got,” She mumbled as she played with the hem of her night gown, “I just don’t want to ruin things for him.” She revealed the truth to him. Billy brushed his shoulder against hers, giving a soft smile as he tried to gain her attention again. 

“It’s alright,” He told her truthfully, not thinking that there was anything wrong with her wanting to drink occasionally, “Can you wear the lingerie?” He asked quickly. He supposed he should’ve clarified, but he wouldn’t mind seeing her in it right now. 

“I can’t,” She laughed, “I’m on my period.” She told him softly as she rested against him. He grinned as he pulled her a little closer, feeling like she was silly for using that excuse. 

“I don’t mind,” He told her quickly as he peppered his lips across her face, “We can sneak into the bathroom if you want.” He pressed the issue softly as he rubbed his hands down her slender curves. He enjoyed the way she felt in his hands and craved to feel more of it. 

“Would you have to confess that to your priest too?” She questioned in a sultry tone as she playfully ran her fingers through his hair. He enjoyed the sensation as he lightly closed his eyes, enjoying how soft her fingers were. 

“Yes,” He answered honestly, “We would. I don’t think it’s any worse than being with your sister.” He said a second later. He laughed to himself, wondering how the priest would react to that revelation. 

“Stepsister,” She corrected him shyly, “I’d prefer to be called your girlfriend though.” She told him quickly, looking like she was insecure suddenly. He frowned at the thought, hoping that he hadn’t offended her. 

“I don’t care about the label,” He admitted to her slowly, “I don’t care who you’re related to or what you do. I just want you.” He cupped her face, giving her soft cheeks a slight squeeze as he peered down at her. 

“Okay,” She mumbled softly as she began to brush her fingertips against the hem of his pajama pants, “I can help you out?” She suggested softly as she began to tug the waistband of his pants down. He grinned as he slowly moved away. 

“How?” He asked her as he held her back, holding her softly. Her hazel eyes flashed, looking at him full of lust. He drank in the image, watching the way her teeth lightly dragged against her plump bottom lip. 

“I’ll make you feel good.” She said slyly as she slowly rolled her wrist around in his palm, like she was ready to grab a hold of him. He pretended to ponder the thought. 

“By doing what?” He teased her softly, needing to hear her say it outloud. He turned his gaze towards her, his eyelids feeling heavy as he peered down at her. 

“Sucking your cock.” She replied shyly, her cheeks beginning to turn pink as she slowly moved to her knees in front of him. She leaned forward, her boobs pressing against his knees as she watched him. He felt his cock beginning to stir, quickly filling out as he thought about how badly he wanted her. 

“You’re not even going to ask?” He continued to tease her, “Just going to do it like a little whore.” She whimpered softly at his words, her cheeks burning darker as she leaned even closer to him. He had a sudden urge to strip her nightgown from her pale skin. 

“Can I suck your cock?” She asked sweetly, her tone sultry as she peered up at him innocently. She fluttered her eyelashes as she traced her fingertips up and down his thighs. He felt goosebumps beginning to form from her touch. 

“Hm.” He mocked being bored, beginning to really enjoy the strain in his pants. He breathed out slowly, watching the way she straddled one of his ankles. He smirked to himself, clearly noticing how her excuse of being on her period was slowly disappearing. 

“I want to suck my big brother’s cock,” She whispered as she slowly palmed him, “Please.” She pouted her lips out and he was unable to hold himself back any longer. He nodded his head in agreement, watching the way she slowly pulled his pants down. He lifted his hips softly, assisting her as his cock popped free from its restraints.

“Wow,” She giggled softly, looking gleeful like this was the first time she’d seen it. She wrapped her slender fingers around his cock slowly, giving him a soft squeeze as she watched the precum drip from his tip. He sighed deeply, jerking his hips forward as he enjoyed the sensation, “So pretty.” She teased him softly. 

“I think you’re a slut,” He admitted honestly, breathing out deeply as she slowly wrapped her lips around his tip. He fluttered his eyes shut, his mind falling empty as she began to bob her head up and down the length of his cock, “Jesus.”

She fluttered her eyelashes for a moment before she peered up at him again, her eyebrows softly wrinkling together as she began to slowly move his cock inside of her mouth. The pad of her tongue brushed along his veins, pressing into them softly. He knitted his fingers through her hair, feeling a bit desperate to have her move faster.

She slowly took more of him, teasing him as she didn’t press her lips further than the middle of his cock. He groaned as her fingers moved to cup his balls, squeezing them softly as she sucked on the head of his cock again. She dragged her tongue across his slit, licking at it playfully before she slid his cock deeper inside of her mouth again. 

He pressed his hips up deeper in her mouth, tugging on her hair a little harder as he took control of her movements. He breathed out harshly, suddenly feeling a strong wave of pleasure crashing over him. He grunted loudly, the sound of her gags sounding like music in his ears. 

He played with her hair, holding onto it tighter as he freely bobbed her head along his cock. He liked how easily she gave into him, how he let her control her for his own pleasure. He could feel his cock twitch in her mouth as she hollowed her cheeks out. 

He looked down at her, watching the way her features knitted together in concentration as the tip of his cock hit the back of her throat. He sighed blissfully as she began to hum around his girth, sending a wave of vibrations up the length of his cock.

“Fuck,” He whined, sounding a little pathetic as he jerked his hips forward rapidly. He moved off the bed, feeling like he’d have better control standing as he moved her mouth faster along his cock. He was sure he’d never felt this good before, “You’re such a good baby sister.”

She moaned softly around his cock, looked up at him with knitted eyebrows as her eyes filled further with lust. He smirked to himself, dragging his tongue across his teeth at the realization of how easily he affected her. 

Kim gripped his thighs tightly, squeezing as he continued to roughly pull jerk her mouth along his cock. He grunted a little louder, his mind blazing with want as he pressed his balls against her pouty lips. She gagged loudly, spit falling from her lips as she stared up at him.

He admired the way her face was getting darker, how her gags came out higher pitched as he roughly pressed into her mouth. He couldn’t focus on anything other than the pleasure that he was feeling suddenly.

Her moans became muffled from his cock as his tip repeatedly slammed into the back of her throat. He groaned at how wet and warm her mouth felt, how heavy his cock felt against her tongue. He wished he could fit all of his cock inside of her mouth, to feel the sensation of her mouth everywhere. 

“Fuck, fuck,” He cursed, cumming harshly down her throat far too early. She gagged, coughing a little as she pulled away. She squeezed her eyes shut as she roughly gulped his spunk down. He groaned as he fell back onto the bed, feeling exhausted suddenly, “Shit, was that too much?” He questioned her, suddenly realizing how forward his motions were.

“No,” She giggled as she crawled up the bed to join him, her lips swollen as she looked at him with wide eyes, “I like when you treat me like that.” She admitted, making his lips curl into a smirk as he pulled her onto the bed. He wiped at the corner of her lips, admiring the way the drool was beginning to slide from her mouth. 

He curled up behind her, pulling her close to his chest as he breathed in her sweet scent. He listened to her deep breaths before it slowly fell soft. He peered around her shoulder, surprised at how quickly she’d fallen asleep. 

He held her closer, wishing he could join her. His thoughts felt loud again, running wild as he did his best to rest against her. He just wasn’t tired. He was sure it would hit him eventually. 

It had been so long since Billy had felt this happy and joyful that he was suddenly afraid. He was afraid that it would all come crashing down like it always did. He didn’t want to go back to being bitter and confused. He wanted to stay just like this.

He could afford coke but it was expensive, and it never lasted enough for him to feel high like this all the time. He wanted something to keep his mind away, to keep his heart fluttering and to keep the smile on his lips.

[wonderlandleighleigh]

THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I WAS ON ABOUT!!! Should I say fuck you for breaking my heart or thank you for the fic I will never know. On that note, you can’t just leave it like that! I need, WE all need a continuation of this!

(Thank you I literally thought about it all day to figure out how to write it so I'm glad you like it!)

She has mild withdrawal symptoms.

Aches and headaches. Fatigue. Her appetite comes back a little.

The hardest part, really, is fending off Midge's family and friends. Joel is a fucking nightmare, demanding information when Lenny told him he'd have to hang onto the kids a little longer because Midge is sick.

"Sick? Midge never gets sick. And what the fuck are you doing there? Didn't you run the fuck away?"

Lenny squeezes his eyes shut. "Hold onto the kids. Midge will be in touch." he hangs up after that, thankful to be done with the man, at least for the moment.

Susie is equally difficult. She comes over, demanding face time, and Lenny leaves them to it, making a sandwich for Susie and some toast for Midge.

When he taps on the bedroom door, he gets Susie's usual charming greeting.

"Fuck off, Lenny!"

"Stop that," Midge scolds. "It's okay, Lenny."

He steps in, holding up the plates. "Just some lunch."

"I don't like that he's here," Susie says to Midge as she takes the sandwich. "He's just going to leave again, and you'll be right back where you were."

Lenny takes a breath as Midge takes the toast. He knows she's been thinking about that; that once she's back on her feet, he'll disappear again, and she isn't entirely wrong. He still can't really work here in New York, and Kitty's still out in LA with his mother.

But now that he's back here, all he can think about is being with Midge. Not just to make sure she's okay, but to be with her; be happy with her.

He's missed her.

"It's okay, Susie," Midge says softly. "Really, it's enough that Lenny is here at all to help."

It's not enough.

He knows it's not enough. It'll never be enough.

*****

Midge naps in the afternoon, and he lays down with her, watching her as she dozes.

"You're staring," she mutters with her eyes still closed.

Lenny chuckles softly. "I might be. What of it?"

"Just saying."

"You're hard not to stare at," he tells her. "And I miss staring at you."

"Even when I'm disgusting and exhausted from using insane pills?"

"Even then," he tells her.

Her eyes open and she gazes at him softly. "When do you have to go back to LA?"

"Whenever," he shrugs. "I can write anywhere. I'm not performing much...and Ma's got Kitty."

Midge nods, averting her eyes.

"I don't want to leave," Lenny tells her. "I missed you too much, Midge. It was really fucking stupid to hide from you like that."

She says nothing, rolling over, away from him.

"Midge..."

"You're only saying that because you feel bad for me," she says quietly. "You didn't want my pity, I don't want yours, Lenny."

"This isn't pity," he says, sitting up. "This is honesty. I'm better when I'm with you. Happier. More stable. Less of a fuck-up. And as an added bonus, you're happier when we're together, too."

Again, he doesn't get a response.

"Please, Midge," he says softly. "I know I fucked up. I know leaving you was a terrible thing to do, and you've had so much shit happen to you over the last few years that you couldn't fucking take it anymore, and I know I am undeserving of a second chance-"

She sits up quickly, wide-eyed. "I never said that."

"You didn't have to, I know what I am," Lenny shakes his head. "But fuck do I want one."

She stares at him for a long, silent moment before speaking slowly. "If you don't mean that, I need you to leave."

He gazes into her eyes, tired and teary. Her face is pale and she still looks a little ill. It'll take a couple more days for her to really start feeling better, he knows.

"I mean it," he confesses. "I do. I don't want to leave again. I'm never going to get over you, Midge. Never. And I'm selfish enough to risk ruining your life if it means being in it."

Midge watches him carefully, before slowly wrapping her arms around him, holding him tightly. "Then that second chance is yours," she says against his shoulder.

Lenny holds her tightly, laying back down with her in his arms.

[sleepyblr-heart]

hi its time for me to go insane again <3 this one is extra long so if you care about what's happening on @original-character-championship click the read more for my silly words!!

ok so. picking up from last time. Yellow tells Present he accidentally made her a demi-god. they have a mini training montage. (she does not learn much. he is the god of stupidity so this is to be expected). after that. he drops her off. on T island. not at home. where she was before. but T island

Pres does NOT want to be here, and realizes "hey. i can get revived at blood moon films. the place i got revived at last time. hm."and decides being dead for a bit is better than being back on this fucking island (but Alone this time). Before she's revived she stays at her limbo for a bit (i will prolly show off what it looks like later).

soon, she gets revived by Depressed Glass (they/them), who is Snowglobe's childhood friend and a body snatcher! They take Present to Red Circle (they/them), one of Baton's friends and the person that helped revive her last time. Red circle says that Baton is safe, at their house, and misses her so very very much. They decide to go visit Baton and Black Square (he/him) (red circle's boyfriend) during RC's break.

Present decides to drop that she's kind of god and the world is ending in like the worst way possible (this will be an important tool that'll help us later!). Also Baton maybe gets a lil bit cursed on accident by her adopted kid that kidnapped him (Hattish (any pronouns)). But it's finneee.

Anyways, Present gets taken to the 4th Wall for a bit because of God Shenanigans, and before she goes back Present and one of the gods, Purple, have a nice chat! They even start teaching her how to do (minor) shapeshifting! All she can do at the moment is change her ribbon color, but she gets better at it eventually!

She goes back to RC and BS's house, and everything is swell for a bit. She misses Snowglobe, and is a bit worried for her and Baton, but other than that everything is fine!

After a few days, Present is taking a nice nap on the couch, Baton just sitting on the floor in front of a very nice bookshelf, just waking up from her own nap. And oh ok. The Bookshelf fell on top of her. Dear god.

Luckily, her plastic is strong enough that she Doesn't die, but she is bleeding a lot, he cant move, and Present is freaking out so much, especially since BS and RC are at work at the time. Luckily, two gods (Red and Yellow) decide to help get Baton to the hospital. Yellow helps with the surgery (Because he is Definitely a surgeon and did not fake any documents). And oh hey, look who's in the same hospital room! It's depressed glass! wonder why they're here.

anyways! Thanks to more God Shenanigans Snowglobe is brought to the 4th wall, along with Present so they can meet. Present catches her up on everything and they both realize. Hey. These god guys. Kinda Suck. They haven't told her much of anything, not about her powers or what she needs to do to save the world. She has a bit of a breakdown about the whole situation, since she doesn't. Want any of this, and Snowglobe tries to help comfort her.

They are brought back to the hospital room and Snowglobe and Depressed Glass have a chat about how they Definitely tried to avenge her death by murdering Red Circle and also took over two innocent people's bodies. Luckily, DG Realized that "hey, this is a bad idea. and totally not what she would want. also she's alive again so. maybe. i should give up on this." Plus, they already had their shit rocked by one of the people they possessed (oh hey that's why they're in the hospital!) so everyone decides that was stupid, and as long as they work to be better. and try to apologize to the people they hurt. they're fine.

anyways! more god shenanigans. this time they accidentally swapped a few peoples bodies. Luckily, we only need to worry about a few! Present and Snowglobe swapped bodies, and Baton and Red Circle also swapped. And oh hey. the God Shenanigans are now Everyone shenanigans. Turns out, the gods really hate this One Really Old Man named Angelsea(he/him). And they want everyone in this room to help murder him (besides red because they were. not in the plan.)

The first part of the plan is to get this random guy no one here besides Depressed Glass could know, Toothbrush (he/they). They're here because they work security at Blood Moon Films, and he could deal with the security cameras in the hospital!

They do not want to help with a murder plan. But they really need the help, so... Red convinces Present, in snowglobes body, to take over Toothbrushes body. She really only agrees to do it cause... Why should she not? She's supposed to help them, and maybe helping them kill this man she doesn't know will help save the world! (plus, she doesn't want to disappoint them)

So, Present takes over Toothbrush's body, and the murder plan goes. About as well as you would expect. Present and Toothbrush do their part well, at least. And once Angelsea is dead, Present separates from Toothbrush, killing them both (for now)

Present is revived by Baton (in red circle's body). Baton had visited Red circle in their body and they told her about the... whole murder plan thing. And is... A bit disappointed. Not for the murder (well i mean. yes the murder but that's not it), but the fact she just... Went along with what the god had asked of her. It's not like SHE wanted to do it, in the first place. Baton talks to her a bit, and tell her that she shouldn't do things just because these LOSERS told her to. And that maybe. She should quit.

She says she'll talk to the gods about it (she never does) and they head back to RC's home. Present realizes Snowglobe went missing after the murder plan, and no matter where she and baton look they can't find her. It's probably fine.

anyways present and snow globe got kidnapped by the older gods (Plants and Bookmark (they/them for both)) to fix the fact they were body swapped. Unfortunately bookmark is a lil stupid and fucked up present's wrapping paper so they replaced it themselves.

anyways the older gods dropped them off in an alleyway. but at least they were in the correct bodies (🎉🎉🎉)

anyways. remember how present told baton that she was a demi-god? yeah uh. She Wasn't supposed to do that. Purple and Red told the two that. Because Purple accidentally told baton their Real names when trying to help return her to the correct body, and present told him about the god thing, Yellow decided that he knew Too Much and her memories had to be erased.

Yellow, however, is still god of stupidity. He meant to just get rid of any memories related to the gods, but instead got rid of any memories related to magic at all. Luckily, any memories not directly related to gods were not Completely removed, they were so blurry that is was difficult to remember any details about it. Oh btw she had been surrounded by magic for the 6 years that this story had taken place over.

Purple and red help them back to RC's house, where baton is (no, she was Not properly released from the hospital but. it's fineee) and they all have a nice reunion where baton almost immediately thinks she cheated on her girlfriend with Red Circle because of a fake news article that she had read.

Anyways, some less important things happen. snowglobe gets fed a person thinking it's koolaid. that person might've been a potion. that potion might've been a love amplification potion. you know. normal things.

anyways snowglobe decides to tell present and baton that she developed feelings for them both (being small crushes amplified by the "koolaid"). turns out, present and baton also had feelings (ones they had talked about together before hand) for snowglobe. so they say "fuck it. lets date." and bam. bitches acquired.

and that's the end for. todays insanity. ill see you next time. because there's still more to cover. (there's. so much to cover. i might save some for next round if she wins. so vote for her if you wanna hear more of her story!)

[tcmuses]

“With great power comes great need to take a nap. Wake me up later.”

Kate’s entire body was slick with sweat, blonde strands of hair stuck to her forehead and what little was left of her lip gloss. Although she couldn’t stand the feeling of it, she didn’t have the strength to move just yet. Her thighs were still shaking ever so slightly, chest heaving as she tried to catch her breath. She didn’t have it in her yet to look over at Josiah, instead, she simply laid there with her eyes closed. When she’d finally relaxed enough, she brought a shaking, clammy hand to her face to brush her hair away. Josiah had a way of exhausting her, not stopping even when she begged him to. Not that she really wanted him to stop anyway. On days like this, she stopped counting her orgasms after a certain point, simply stuck in a state of bliss and overstimulation.

The humor of it all was that she’d come to his room with the intent of taking care of him. Quin had said he’d been up all night, working on some project that neither of them were smart enough to understand. Knowing Josiah, he’d probably been up for a couple of days at least. Often she worried about him, the long term effects the lack of sleep would eventually have on his health— especially now that he was going to the gym with her in the mornings. Usually they had to resort to tricking him into sleep, the easiest method of course being exhausting him with sex. Quin had been doing it for years, and as of late she’d started doing it too. She’d planned to keep him in bed for a couple of hours, hoping he’d fall asleep a couple of orgasms later but he’d had a different idea in mind. After his first he’d flipped her over and got to eating like a man starved.

Finally having caught her breath, Kate couldn’t help but think about how quiet Josiah had fallen. He wasn’t a talker after sex, not in the way that Quin or Syd were, but he wasn’t typically silent either. Lazily, she turned over to her side to face him. She opened her eyes, only to discover he’d seemingly dozed off. Her brows furrowed together in confusion, lips twisting into a smile. “Josiah?” She questioned. Sleep had been the goal, after all, but surely THIS hadn’t put him to sleep, right? He stirred, blonde lashes fluttering just slightly before his sleepy eyes locked on to hers. He didn’t say much, just mumbled something softly as he tried to understand what it was that she needed. “Did you fall asleep?” She asked, still in disbelief. “‘M tired,” he replied, voice a little louder as he closed his eyes once more. “No the fuck you’re not,” Kate mused, a slight laugh in her voice. This time it was his turn to furrow his brows, though his seemed to be more in frustration than confusion, “and why not?”

“Well, because…” she trailed off “you only came once— I’m the one that should be tired. You hardly did anything— well not anything, you did things…” She couldn’t help but stumble over her words, afraid of making him feel unappreciated. “I mean really it’s actually insane what you’re capable of,” she finally settled on. With a heavy sigh, he moved closer, wrapping both of his arms around her body and pulling her flush against him. “With great power comes great need to take a nap. Wake me up later”. And with that, he was back to dozing off.

Kate snuggled up closer to him, although the heat and sweat had made their bodies uncomfortably sticky. She noted that the two of them would need to take a shower when he woke, and that she should try this method again the next time he needed sleep.

[livingwithlosingyou]

Living with Losing You - 10/15/2022

I WON!!! 

How!? I don’t even know. I am so competitive. 

Okay, so today was insane. I was non stop. I can’t wait to go to bed, but I really wanted to type this all out. 

I woke up to the blaring sound of my alarm at around 7:47am. I had to be at the race technically by 8:30am, but really just before 9am. So I quickly got dressed and packed some stuff to bring to the race. I really was note sure what I was going to do today, or how I was going to approach it since I hadn’t been training. I always tell myself I can just “run it for fun” but I ALWAYS end up pushing myself and get too competitive. 

I grabbed the address from the email that I got and it took me to a weird entrance where the gate was locked. Luckily your aunt was working the event (it’s also why I did it in the first place) so I called her and she walked me through where I should go. Unfortunately by this point it was already 8:45am and I didn’t want to miss the race, so I parked on the other side of the fence, hopped said fence, and ran almost a mile to get to where the actual race was. On the way I ran into your aunt and we asked the chief of police and another office if it was okay, and they said since it was on the property I could park there. More on that later. 

I run up with a couple of minutes to spare and start doing some dynamic stretching that was being led by one of the vendors. Then, the played the national anthem, and it was go time! 

I started near the front, and basically stayed there. I was definitely in the top 10, but I am not sure of the exact results. I can’t find them on the website. I was the #1 girl though! I averaged about 7:10-7:20 pacing for most of it, which I was impressed with all things considered (I didn’t really train and I was up and out super late last night). The run itself was so pretty though. It helped distract me from the pain. In those moments that I felt like really slowing down. I imagined you cheering me on. Also, the fact that your aunt invited me I felt like I needed dot make her proud. She was pretty excited that I was the first female. I mean, I was especially excited when I found out there were little cash prizes for the top finishers overall for men and women, and then the top finisher for certain age groups. I also got a participation medal (love that for me), a nice shirt, a tumblr, and a bunch of other fun swag. They announced me and I had to go onstage since I was the top emailed finisher. I will say, it felt good. I felt like a bad bitch, and I also love that for me. It’s the little things. 

 I ended up staying back a little but to help your aunt clean up, pass out the prizes, etc. I was funny because those two policemen I referenced earlier approached us and your aunt was like “you cant tow her now cause she won” and then the chief said, “isn’t there a fence between where you parked and here?” To which I replied, “Maybe”. He asked me if I jumped it, and I said “Allegedly”, which was one of your most utilized words. It was a funny interaction. He said he likely got it on video, and I told him he would want to watch that back. I had to top it again to get back to my car too. It was all super funny. 

Right after the race I realized how hungry I was, so naturally I went to the GF bakery since it’s my last day to (sad face). I ordered a few things and gave a nice tip. Then, I came back to Beth’s, watched the finale of She-Hulk, and just sat and relaxed for a little bit. I wanted to nap, but I knew I wouldn’t have time. 

I then showered and quickly got ready yo go to the studio. I had to pack some stuff because I was going to Mark’s for dinner right after. Like I said, SUPER busy, I am super tired. 

Today our focus in the studio was a song called “Make you Mine”. This is the song that I first wrote to James / about James to try and tell him how I was feeling. It’s a very cute song. He would be sop happy with it, and I am sure so proud of me too. Just as we did yesterday, it was hours in the booth doing take after take. I do enjoy it, but it can be tiring on the voice and just overall. Some of you may be thinking, “Wow, she ran a 5K then sang isn't that bad?” For me, I believe it helps me. It opens up my airways more. I really can’t wait to hear how this song comes together, but also how the James song is coming along too. It has been helpful to work on music. 

I was supposed to have a hard stop at 5:30pm, but I ended up leaving a little later due to some difficulties with figuring out the beats, notes, etc. Once we finished what we needed to I ran to my car and went right to Mark’s house. There, I was greeted by his sweet elderly neighbors and a couple of friends I have met before. Mark cooked AMAZING wagyu steak / pork ribs. On top of that he made twice backed potatoes. The neighbors brought over homemade unsweetened iced tea. It was a beautiful night, so we all sat on the deck and watched the UK game. Once it reached about 8:50pm, I headed back to your mom’s.

I was definitely supposed to run a few errands / get some laundry done today, but they did not happen. I washed my face make up on my eyes with my shampoo because I feel like besides the wipes, it’s the only things that works when comparing to a soap bar. I had no time to do laundry. I got home after 9am and your mom was already sleeping, so I figure I can do these tomorrow. 

Anyway, unfortunately I got it in my eyes to the point I turned on and jumped in the shower to make it easier to get out. Honestly my eyes still kind of burn. I put some drops in, by likely I just need to go to bed, which I will do here very soon. 

I still can’t believe that I won that race. It feels good. 

Only a couple more days here, and they’re filling up fast. I have gotten so used to being out here that it’s going to be strange to be back in SD. I am curious to see how that goes. 

I went into the room today where you took your life. It’s taken a few times for me to not feel completely uncomfortable. I have gone up there a grabbed items here and there that I needed (sweaters, etc.) I like wearing your clothing. I mean, I’d wear it before this all happened as well. 

I should be getting brunch with your dad and then heading to a fair with Finley. I am going to record Sunday evening. At least that’s the plan for now. 

SO bittersweet. I am excited to see my animals though. 

I love you more than I can ever put into words, James. 

Rest in Peace, James Burton Nichols

10/1/1993 - 7/16/2022

[scuttling]

Stay at Home DILF

Fandom: Criminal Minds Pairings: Aaron Hotchner/Female Reader Word Count: 5,863 Tags: 18+, NSFW, Dad Bod Hotch, Insecure Hotch, Oral sex, Fingering, Unprotected sex, A little angsty by accident Summary: Aaron retires from the BAU when the new baby is born, but a year later the lack of structure, sleep, and time for himself means changes to his body he's not very proud of. When the thought of having another child is brought up, how will he and his wife work through his insecurities to make the perfectly imperfect, happy family? *Requested by anon Link to A03 or read below! “Honey, I have to get going—do you need me to drop Jack off at school, or are you good?” Professor Hotchner slides her foot into a flesh-toned pump, leaning against the kitchen table for support and stealing a grape from Jack’s fruit salad. He narrows his eyes, then sticks out his tongue, and she does the same. “Do you want me to starve, Jackrabbit?”

“You won’t starve. Get your own grapes.” So full of sass, that one. Seven is such a fun age. She decides to blame the mixture of Aaron’s genes and Haley’s, and she pulls out her phone to send Haley a quick text.

Your son is a menace in the morning.

Haley: Gets that from his dad.

Aaron enters the kitchen, holding their one year old daughter Mia, and he sticks her in her highchair, puts her breakfast in front of her, and leans toward his wife.

“I’m good, I’ll take him,” he says, and kisses her lips. “Mia and I will take big brother Jack to school, won’t we?” Mia is obsessed with Jack—her first word was Jack, or rather, Ack, which was super cute—so she giggles happily, and her mother can’t help but smile. Their little family is absolutely perfect.

She leans in for another kiss from Aaron, and then another, and then maybe one more...

“You’re getting distracted,” Jack says, and she looks over at him with a raised eyebrow, then back to Aaron. He shrugs.

“It was on one of his vocabulary sheets.” Figures.

“Well, maybe I find my boys distracting. Let me give you kisses and we’ll find out!” She launches herself at him, kissing his head and his cheeks, and he laughs, and she knows she’s going to be late for work, but she can’t pass up moments like these, she just can’t.

She gives him a hug and tells him to have a good day, then she kisses Mia, and then she puts her arms around Aaron’s neck and kisses him goodbye. Before she pulls away, something comes over her—the warmth of this perfect morning, the overwhelming love for both of their sassy, silly kids, or maybe the fact that they’ve been too busy for sex lately and she’s constantly horny for him—and she looks up at him and whispers, “we should have another baby.”

Aaron grins immediately.

“Yeah we should.” They kiss a few more times, quickly, smiling against each other's lips, and he pats her hip because he knows she has to go. “We’ll talk more later, but yes. I want to. I love you.” He takes her face in his hands and kisses her deeply, and she sighs, grabs her bags, and heads out the door. Work is work; as the youngest professor in the English department, her schedule is jam packed with classes, lectures, morning office hours, but despite all that, it seems that Aaron is having the more difficult day.

They both love that he was able to retire from the BAU early to be a stay at home dad when Mia was born—he does consult for them occasionally, but has no official title, doesn’t have to travel—and he’s amazing at it, but she knows her baby can be a handful even on a good day. The texts she’s been getting all morning only solidify that knowledge.

Aaron: FYI - Mia hates bananas this week.

Aaron: What do they put in this applesauce, crack? She’s tearing around here like a bat out of hell.

Aaron: Okay, she’s your child, I officially renounce her. I put on The White Album and she started crying.

Maybe she prefers Abbey Road?

Aaron: No. Unlike her mother, she has taste.

You wound me, Hotchner.

She works through lunch, grading papers on The Call of the Wild, but when Aaron’s name lights up the display on her phone, she puts her pen down and smiles, puts it on speaker.

She’s sorry she did, because Mia is wailing in the background, and it’s very clearly her, I’m exhausted, asshole, leave me alone, cry, which makes her wonder why she’s not taking a nap. She knows she resists Aaron sometimes, doesn’t want him to leave her alone in her room, which is so sweet and also so, so annoying.

“Hi, sweetheart. Are you having a little trouble over there?” He takes a deep breath and sighs.

“She won’t go down, baby, even if I sit in the rocking chair beside her. It’s been twenty minutes.” Wow. He put up with it longer than she would have.

“Put her in her crib with Stuffy Bear and just let her cry; I know you hate that, but she’ll give up eventually.” He groans softly.

“I can’t; I feel so bad.”

She smiles. Her warm-hearted man.

“She does this because she knows you’ll give in and do whatever she wants. I promise you, she’ll be happier for it; she sounds miserable.”

“I don’t know…” he says, and she can tell he’s not going to do it. She picks up her pen and skims the paper she abandoned.

“Are you tired?” She doesn't wait for an answer, because she knows he is: Jack had a bad dream last night and woke them both up, and Aaron went to lay with him until he fell asleep because he knew she had an early morning. It was almost time for her alarm when he made it back to bed. “If you want to try to nap, she’s going to have to nap. Do it for her, yourself, me, a combination of the three of us. She won’t be mad at you; she won’t even remember.”

“What if I give her abandonment issues?” he presses, and she closes her eyes for a moment.

“Aaron, I love you so much. You’re such a great dad, and our kids are lucky to have you. But you have to loosen the reins just a little, especially if… if we are going to have another baby.” The thought makes her smile, and she can tell he’s smiling down the line, too.

“Right. Loosen the reins. Just put her in her crib,” she can hear that he does that, “and give her Stuffy Bear, and let her cry.” He blows out a breath, and she can hear the door click shut behind him as he leaves her room. She’s proud of him, but she also knows he’s going to sit in front of the video monitor and watch to make sure she falls asleep, and that he’ll probably work on laundry after that and not actually take a nap of his own.

He insists he’s doing fine when she brings it up, but the way he sacks out like a corpse when they get into bed doesn’t exactly have her convinced.

“I love you, and miss you,” he says when it’s slightly quieter, though she can faintly hear the cries through the monitor. “It made me really happy this morning when you said we should have another baby. We make perfect babies, have you noticed?” She hides her grin behind her hand, because if anyone walked by her office they’d think she’s insane with how widely she’s smiling.

“I have noticed, but since we only have the one and I can’t take any credit for Jack, I figured we should probably make another. Maybe the same way we made Mia…” They’re both convinced it was a weekend when Jack was at Haley’s and the two of them went to town on each other, true marathon sex where they only stopped for food and water and she coaxed him to hardness so many times she felt like a damn sex goddess.

“Hmm. I remember that with fondness, and would love to do that again. You know Haley said she’d take Mia on one of Jack’s weekends if we ever needed her to.”

Her life is pretty damn perfect, with her gorgeous, caring husband, and her two awesome kiddos, and a job she loves, but the most unexpectedly sweet part is that Haley is so comfortable with her, and that she and Aaron were able to get past the ugliness of their divorce to eventually become friends again. It’s not something they take for granted.

“Maybe we should take her up on it this weekend,” she says, trying to sound a little sultry. “We’ve both been so busy; it’s been a while since you pet my kitty.” For some reason, this particular phrase makes Aaron blush and get insanely horny, and she’s hoping to tease him so much the rest of the week that their weekend is one neither of them ever forget, so she’s pulling out the big guns.

“It’s been far too long, and I’m sorry. I can’t wait, baby. I’ll call her here in a few; I know you have to get to your next lecture.” She looks down at her watch, and it is about time to clean up and head over. She sighs happily down the line.

“Okay, I love and miss you; try to take a power nap. I promise, she’ll be fine.”

“I will.” He won’t. “Talk to you soon.” When she gets home, Aaron has dinner ready; she told him to hold off, that she’d help when she got there, but he has always been an overachiever.

Mia is already in her high-chair, waiting patiently for once in her little life; she kisses her forehead, breathes in her sweet baby smell, and then makes her way to her husband.

“Looks good, honey,” she says as he sets the table, and she leans up for a kiss, but when she presses her hand to his stomach like she always does, he pulls back a little. “Is everything okay? Did you have a bad afternoon?”

“No, it wasn’t bad after the nap fiasco,” he responds, but he sounds distracted. Maybe he was asked to look at a case, or something, and that’s still on his mind? She leans against his shoulder, puts a hand on his back and attempts to push up his t-shirt, to skim her hand up along his spine, which always comforts him, but again, he shifts away from her touch. She sighs and steps back.

“You're going to give me a complex, Aaron. If I did something to upset you, please tell me so I can apologize and try to make it better.” He turns to look at her face, and his formerly tense jaw softens a little; he presses his lips to hers, just a peck.

“No, you didn’t do anything. I’m just a little tired, that’s all.” He smiles softly, and she’s sure he is tired, but this seems like something more.

“You’d tell me if something else was bothering you, right? You know I’m here for you.”

“Of course I would, and of course I do. I love you,” he breathes against her mouth, and then he goes in for a longer kiss and she gets, as Jack said earlier, a little distracted. When the kiss breaks, she sighs happily.

“I love you. Missed those lips,” she murmurs, and then she runs a hand over his hair. “If the kids wake up again tonight, I’ll get them. You need to rest.” He shakes his head.

“You have another full day tomorrow,” he counters, and it’s so sweet that he keeps up with the schedule she has posted on the fridge, but still. She puts her hand on her hip.

“And you don’t? It’s my turn. Let me help.” He looks like he wants to argue, but she gives him the glare he knows means she will talk about this all night if he doesn’t agree; she’s not the sponsor of the university’s debate team for nothing, and even his prosecutorial ways have nothing on her.

“Okay,” he sighs, and she smiles and kisses him and then goes to get Jack and make sure he’s cleaned up for dinner.

That night when the two of them are getting ready for bed, she’s surprised as hell when he stops her from pulling one of his t-shirts—her typical sleepwear—over her head. She sets it down, arches her brow, and he guides her back onto the bed with a grin and puts his hands on her hips.

“What’s happening right now?” she asks, because before Mia, sure, Aaron would treat her to all manner of orgasm-inducing behavior at random, and she would do the same, but since Mia—especially in the last six months or so—their sexual encounters have been few and far between. It’s no one’s fault, and they’re both very clearly still attracted to each other; it’s just one of those things that falls by the wayside when you have a new baby and a hectic life and you don’t get enough sleep.

Needless to say, she is a little confused by this turn of events.

“I’m attempting to worship my gorgeous fucking wife,” he murmurs, and he leans up and kisses her stomach, licks a long line up from her belly button. Her breath hitches. “Gonna put another little baby in here—but it’s always beautiful.” He slowly moves his lips higher, over her ribcage, and holds her there. “You’re perfect, you know?”

“Aaron.” Her fingers come up to sweep through his hair; her heart aches with love and tenderness. He moves up, presses open-mouthed kisses to each of her breasts, then covers them with his hands and squeezes. She’s a panting, dripping mess, and more than anything she wants to strip him naked, pull him closer, get him inside her.

“I love you just as you are; I want you just as you are. Always have, always will.” He smooths his hands up over her throat, and brings her mouth to his for a deep, soulful kiss. She hadn’t even realized she’s been feeling repressed, but his touch tonight makes her feel so beautiful and special… It's incredible how close she is from only that.

“Make love to me,” she whispers, and he kisses her again, but then he slides back down her body.

“Want to taste you,” he says instead, and he gets his hands on her hips again and his mouth on her pussy, looks up at her while he licks and sucks like he’s gone without for ages—which he has, she figures, but it’s blowing her mind, her fingers scratching at the sheets, her neck arched. He massages her hips as his tongue works, as he grinds against the bed, and she comes with a whimper, because her body is so overwhelmed by how good she feels that she can’t even properly vocalize it.

Aaron comes up, just a little, rests his head on her stomach, and she smooths her hands over his hair and his shoulders, since that’s all she can reach.

“Come up and let me touch you—or you can come inside me.” She will happily take either option, but he just kisses her belly and shakes his head.

“No, I’m good. Just really tired.” She frowns, can’t recall a time in her life when they didn’t both get off during sex; he catches her expression and runs his hands up her body. “Really, I’m okay. I just wanted to do that before I passed out.” He smiles, and she doesn’t like it, but he climbs off of her and goes to the bathroom, and she pulls on the t-shirt and crawls into bed. Two days later, she’s sitting in her office grading tests when she hears a knock at the door. She looks up, and it’s Aaron, of course, looking so gorgeous in a black polo and jeans.

“Hey, what are you doing here? Where’s Mia?” she asks with a smile. He leans against the doorframe with his arms crossed.

“She’s with her Aunt Penelope for a few hours.”

“Why? Is everything okay?” Penelope is at work, she knows, because she texted her earlier about something unrelated and she’d mentioned that she and Spencer were having coffee and that he said hello.

“Everything‘s fine,” he assures her, and he enters the room fully, closes the door behind him… and locks it. “Can’t your husband come visit you during your super secret not-really-office-hours?” She raises an eyebrow, both at his question and the fact that he locked the door. What exactly is he planning to do, she wonders?

“You can, but you don’t. I guess I’m just surprised.”

“Well today I decided to. I missed you so much.” He walks around her desk and leans over her for a couple of kisses. “Have you missed me?” She rolls her eyes, smiles.

“Of course I missed you. I miss you every second I’m away from you.” She reaches out, wants to hug him, pull him closer, but he takes a step back and crooks his finger, encouraging her to follow him.

He’s being really weird, but he’s also being really hot. She decides to play along.

She stands, walks over to him, and he carefully clears a spot on her desk, knows she has a system and doesn’t like a mess; when she’s within reach, he puts his hands on her waist and lifts her up onto it, her ass where a stack of tests had just been. Fuck.

“I want to get this dress off of you,” he says, voice low, and he takes her face in his hands and kisses her, rough and deep. “Can I take it off, baby? Can I make you come?”

Everything is happening so fast her head is spinning—it’s not like him to just show up at her office, to try to have sex with her there, especially when their dry spell has been, up until recently, like the damn Sahara.

He must sense her confusion, her apprehension, because he kisses slowly along the side of her throat, down the v-neck of her dress, making her eyelids flutter.

“The door’s locked, and no one even knows we’re in here. Can I take it off?” She pants, thinks about this for a second, but then he slides a hand over her thigh, pushing her skirt up, and she gets a little distracted. She nods, and he kisses her hard and unties the sash of her wrap dress, pushes it off her shoulders. She’s glad she wore a matching set of bra and panties, because this is like prime fantasy material and she wants to try to remember every detail.

He kisses her mouth, soft and sweet, then tugs the straps of her bra down her shoulders, pulls the cups down so her breasts fall out of them. She moans, a little startled, and he dips his head to mouth at her nipples, rests one hand on her lower back and one on her stomach—probably because she looks like she’s about to slide off the desk and onto the floor like a blob of jelly. She knows that’s how she feels.

When he’s gotten her thoroughly worked up, almost trembling with the need for more, he pushes her panties aside and presses a finger into her, and she whimpers, wraps her hand around his neck for support when he starts to pump it deeply inside.

“What has gotten into you?” she breathes, and her hips chase the pleasure he brings; the hand on her back moves to her ass, squeezes it.

“I love you and I want you. I want to make you happy, I want you to feel good.”

“Me—me too,” she gasps as he moves faster, staring right into his eyes. “I love you, want you. Want to make you happy, feel good.” She cards her fingers through his hair and stretches for a desperate, eager kiss. “I want you so badly, baby, please.”

“I’m right here. You have me,” he murmurs, but that’s not what she means and he has to know it. Just in case he doesn’t, though, she makes herself loud and clear; relationships are all about communication, after all.

“I want you to put your cock in my pussy, I want you to come in me. I want you to fucking ruin me, Aaron, I want you to shove your dick in me and keep shoving.” She sounds unhinged, but she can’t stop.

He adds a second finger—not what she wants—and roughly gropes her breast—it feels so good, but it’s not what she wants. Why won’t he give her what she wants?

“Shh, just come on my hand, it’s okay. I’ll fuck you later, in our bed, baby,” he promises. “Just come now, okay? Right here, right now for me.”

She does, because even if he’s being unnecessarily aggravating, it’s still Aaron. She’s desperate for him, always has been, always will be. She comes loud and high and she clutches him tightly and he kisses her and coos words of love and affection into her ear. She gets cleaned up, and they go for lunch, and they can’t take their eyes off each other.

Something’s very wrong, and she can’t quite put her finger on it.

That evening when she gets home, Aaron is feeling guilty. She’s not sure why, but he’s executing all of his patented guilty trademark behaviors: he offers her a glass of wine, runs her a bath, rubs her feet, even though he’s been the one home with the baby all day. She’s tempted to ask if he’s cheating on her, as a joke, but that’s never funny, especially when she knows he’s being shifty and weird about something.

When they’re laying in bed, he sets down his book and looks over at her.

“I meant to tell you, Haley isn’t able to take Mia tomorrow. Maybe the weekend after, we can have our special alone time.” She won’t say she’s not disappointed, but she doesn’t want to inconvenience Haley, when she’s already being so great. She smiles softly, covers his hand with hers.

“That’s okay. It was short notice, anyway. I’ll still enjoy my weekend, with you and Mia.” He smiles too, but it doesn’t quite touch his eyes.

The kids sleep through the night, but she doesn’t. On Friday, she picks Jack up from school and takes him to Haley’s, who sends him to wash up so she can make him a snack. When he’s gone, she smiles warmly and invites her into the kitchen for coffee; she takes a cup, and they make pleasant small talk like they always do.

“Are you sure you don’t want to bring Mia over?” Haley asks after a few minutes. It sounds like she’s double checking. “It’s really no trouble.” She frowns, sets her cup down.

“I thought you weren’t able to watch Mia this weekend. I thought… I thought that’s what Aaron said. I must have misunderstood him.” That’s the only logical conclusion, because Aaron wouldn’t lie to her. He wouldn’t.

“He was being a little weird on the phone the other day. He asked me if I would watch her, and I said yes. He told me about your plans,” she says with raised eyebrows, “and then I told him, you know. That he better treat you right, because you just had a baby not that long ago and you might be a little self-conscious about jumping back into the sack like that; not that you should be, because you look amazing.” She racks her brain for the first time he started acting strangely, pulling away from her, and it would have been after his conversation with Haley. She asks, just to confirm.

“Is that when he got weird?”

“Actually yeah. He changed his mind, said you might not need me to watch her after all, but I told him the offer stood. He was pretty quick to get off the phone after that.” She would sip her coffee, but she’s pretty sure her hands are shaking. Why would he lie about that?

“You know, I should go. I’m sure Aaron’s pulling his hair out with her, she’s been a devil today. Tell Jack I love him and I’ll talk to him tonight, will you?”

“Of course. If you change your mind about Mia, just let me know,” Haley says, and she gets into her car with tears stinging her eyes.

When she gets home, Aaron is playing with Mia on the living room floor. He looks up at her with a smile that abruptly falls when he takes in her facial expression.

“What’s wrong?” She composes herself, takes a deep breath. They vowed a long time ago not to argue in front of Jack or Mia. She tries to sound conversational.

“You lied to me. You said Haley couldn’t take Mia this weekend.” He swallows and looks properly guilty. She’s not sure how he was able to lie to her in the first place; he’s never been any good at it.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have. I just didn’t know how to say it.” She looks up, shakes her head, wills her eyes not to water while she’s trying to have this conversation.

“You didn’t know how to say what? What is it that’s made you distance yourself from me?” She recalls him physically pulling away, then doing a complete 180 and initiating sex, but never penetrative sex, never letting her touch him or return the favor in any way. “Haley told me about your conversation. So do you think I’m unhappy with my body, or are you unhappy with my body?” He has the nerve to look confused, gets Mia set up with some toys she can play with safely on her own and stands up, comes close to her. She’s not sure she even wants his touch right now, which is saying something; when she’s unhappy, that’s usually all she wants.

“Neither of those things. I swear to god. I love you and I love your body; you’re so beautiful. Too beautiful for me, you always have been.” He’s looking down at her so seriously, and she wants so badly to believe him, but how could she, when faced with the evidence?

“Okay. If it’s neither of those things…” Her voice is small when she says the one option that hurts her most. “Did you change your mind? Do you not want to have another baby with me?” He sighs, deflates, and she takes a deep, shuddering breath.

“No, listen to me. It’s not that I don’t want that; I want that more than anything, but it will… further complicate, things...” He trails off, and she tries to follow what he’s saying. “The problem isn’t you in any way. It’s me.” She huffs, squeezes her eyes briefly shut.

“You? How can it be you, when you’ve been the only man to catch my eye for years? From the moment you set foot on my campus looking for your bad guy, I’ve been attracted to you, aroused by you, wrapped around your finger. You’re so perfect for me: perfect husband, perfect dad, perfect lover. My best friend. Never a day has gone by where I haven’t wanted you.” He wets his lips, sighs.

“Surely you’ve noticed that since I quit my job and started staying home with Mia, I… I don’t look the same. I’ve… let myself go.” His brows are deeply furrowed, and he’s clearly struggling with this; she reaches for him, no longer angry—at least for the time being—puts a hand on his arm.

“I’ve noticed that you don’t quite look the same. Doesn’t mean you’ve ‘let yourself go,’ or that I’m not still attracted to you; you just have a dad bod now instead of an ‘FBI guy who punches people for a living’ bod.” Her other hand hovers, then comes to rest on his stomach, and she smiles. “I’m actually really into the way you look now. I’ve been fantasizing about it for ages. I wish I’d known you were feeling self-conscious.”

“I’m not used to feeling… self-conscious, vulnerable,” he breathes, but he presses into her touch, so she considers that a good thing. “I didn’t know how to handle it.”

“I get that baby, I do, but this is me. I would have done anything I could to make you feel better. You didn’t have to hide it from me. You didn’t have to lie. We could have talked about it.” She moves the hand on his arm to his face, guides him down for a loving kiss. “We’re equally to blame, because I know you haven’t been getting good sleep, and I know you barely have time for yourself, and I didn’t step in; but you never let me help. If roles were reversed, and it was me staying home with Mia, you would never expect me to do all the cooking and cleaning and homework and bath time without your help. So you need to let me help, Aaron, please.” She looks up at him, eyes warm and sincere, and he nods, bends to press a kiss to her lips.

“I’m sorry. I still don’t feel great about… myself, but maybe I could. If I let you help. If I took some time for me.” She nods and wraps her arms around him—finally—for a hug.

“I love you so much. Just like this. Big, cuddly papa bear, taking care of our babies, making our home a safe and happy place for them. How could I not love the body that brings me so much happiness? That makes me excited to get in my car and come home at the end of every day?”

They kiss some more, deep, healing kisses and soft, sweet kisses, but she doesn’t get distracted by them. She’s very focused, caresses him and brushes loving fingertips over his chest and arms and sides. But speaking of distractions…

“Were you doing all those sexy things to try to distract me from wanting you to get all up on me?” she asks, pulling back, and at least he has the decency to flush.

“Kind of? I figured if it was sex you wanted, you’d be happy to get off however it happened; it was great for me too, don’t get me wrong, I just didn’t really want to be touched, feeling the way I felt.” She frowns, rests her head against his chest and holds him tighter.

“That makes me sad. What I wanted was an intimate moment with my husband, and while yes, what you did for me was great, because you’re super hot and very capable,” she says, leaning back in his embrace with a soft smile, “it’s not what I’ve been wanting. I want you all naked and sweaty and heavy on top of me, going to pound town.” He presses his lips together and raises his eyebrows.

“Pound town? What are you, twelve?” She grins, shoves his chest, and he laughs.

“I’m surrounded by college kids all day, please forgive me. I think it got my message across though.” She touches his cheek, looks up into his eyes, and sighs. “Can we take Mia over to Haley’s and give it a shot? I’ll do anything to make you feel happy and comfortable, any position that makes you feel better—though what I’d really like most, if you’ll trust me, is to suck your dick, and then hop on your dick, and then later when we’re ready to go again, we do the pound town thing and make another goddamn baby.”

She’s so serious, and he looks so serious, and then he kisses her and says yes and they pack up their kid and take her to his ex-wife’s so they can get it on, which sounds so much crazier than it actually is. She gets him out of his clothes, doesn’t move slow or spend lots of time focusing on what he thinks are flaws; instead, she proves how desirable he is by practically tearing his pants off and pushing him against the bed and swallowing around his dick just so she can hear all those delicious moans she’s been missing.

After that, she rides him hard, kisses him harder, plants her hands on his chest and stomach and moans and groans against his mouth. “So fucking hot, seriously so fucking hot, Aaron—if I saw you across the room today I wouldn’t change a goddamn thing, I would still pursue you, I’d make you blush like I did back then. I’d be so forward because I wouldn’t be able to stop thinking about how good this would feel.”

She’s rocking his world, no doubt about that; it’s written all over his face, in the hardness of his hands on her hips as she grinds down on his cock, in the way his chest is heaving despite not actually doing any of the work at all. He comes first, and then rubs her clit while she continues to fuck him until she finds her own orgasm; she scratches her nails down his stomach, and he leans up and grabs her face for a rough, perfect kiss.

They take a break, cuddling and kissing and enjoying the feel of bare skin, comfy bed, soft lips. Aaron touches her cheek, tells her how much he loves and appreciates her.

“I’m so sorry I’ve been keeping this inside, and not being truthful. It’s hard, when you’re as perfect as the day I met you, and I’m…” She presses a finger to his lips, shushes him, kisses him.

“You’re as perfect as the day I met you, too. More perfect, even, because every day since then you’ve chosen me, and our family. I could not ask for a better man. Simply could not, Aaron. And if you want me to come home early so you can go to the park to run, or to the gym, then that’s what I'll do, but if you look like you do right now, forever, I’ll be happy with that too. Whatever makes you happy.”

They snuggle and kiss and talk and laugh, and then laughing becomes sex in that way everything becomes sex when you’re genuinely obsessed with the person in your bed.

He gets her on her back, kisses all over, teases her—“mmm, rubbing your kitty, baby, how does it feel?”—and then puts her legs over his shoulders, plants his hands, and fucks, taking every ounce of his pent-up frustration out on her, and it’s incredible.

“Yes, Aaron, yes, baby, oh, god.” Her head is thrown back, and she’s torn between laughing, because she’s been wanting this for months and it’s exactly as awesome as she’d dreamed it would be, and crying, because she fucking loves him, so much it puts a lump in her throat.

“Fuck, baby,” he groans, speeds up, sweaty and gorgeous and smiling. “You’re going to come with me—not just for me, but with me, so my come gets deep inside, so it works and we get another perfect baby who never lets us fucking sleep.” She nods frantically, presses her hips against his, and it’s not simultaneous, but it’s a near damn thing, when they both come groaning each other’s names. A little less than a year later, they have Mason. Aaron is at home in his dad bod, Mia doesn’t cry at naptime, Jack is still a menace in the mornings, and their perfect little family got a little more perfect. Taglist ❤️: @arsonhotchner @mrsh0tchner @ssahotchie @sleepyreaderreads @mintphoenix @meghannnnnn @disgruntledchowchow @azenpal @g-l-pierce @my-rosegold-soul