#i’m about to go through a major life event but i kinda have some time to write letters in english and gallifreyan

[doccywhomst]

the actual literal meaning of TARDIS (Time and Relative Dimension[s] in Space) is so funny cause it’s just…. a very succinct description of what the vehicle travels through? “hello i’m a human and this is my CAR (Concrete and Roads)” uh yeah i sure hope it do

[honeybleed]

— ★ TRYNA THREEWAY WITH HIS ROOMIE // JEAN KIRSTEIN & CONNIE SPRINGER

content & warnings: fem!reader, reader is kinda ditzy bimbo x sunshine, modern au, reader, jean and connie are all in their mid twenties, jean and connie are roommates, reader is in an established relationship with jean but connie has a crush on her, porn no plot, smut mdni (breastplay, groping, oral. f & m receiving, piv protected sex — backshots from connie lawl, cum swallowing, degradation — connie n jean both kinda mean calling reader a whore n slut but not overboard, they both compete during it) look at them 😵‍💫

author’s note: fine, i’ll do it myself cos some of yall forgot jean and connie are best friends! also this is just kinda smutty so not my best work 🚶🏽‍♂️ also dis was inspired by a tiktok edit of connie n jean to paper soldier by brent faiyaz but i lost it 😔😔

word count: 2.4k

“Oi, oi, where are you going?” Jean asked, lips swollen and smeared in lipgloss as Connie got up from the couch.

“I’m tapping out for the night bro. I promise you I got better things to do than watch you eat your girl’s face off.” Connie replied in a wry tone.

Saturday nights were always movie nights for Jean and Connie. Well, it was originally Jean, Connie and Sasha but Sasha moved in with her boyfriend.

Ever since you and Jean began to date, they were always cut short since Jean just could not for the life of him keep his hands to himself if you were in the same vicinity as him.

Connie thought you were a good match for Jean.

Jean had a stick up his ass the majority of the time, but when you swooped in the perpetual scowl etched into his features gradually faded away.

And there was no denying you were sexy.

He had pangs of guilt when he bumped into you in the kitchen Sunday mornings, Jean fast asleep and you were at the coffee machine.

It was out of his control, the way his mouth went dry and his cock twitched at your ass and hard nipples peeking through one of Jean’s baggy shirts that draped to your knees, but managed to settle just above the curve of your backside.

It was just difficult not to stare. He settled on trying to be cold and distant but when you said as a passing comment to Jean you thought Connie didn’t like you, he nearly kicked his ass.

“You make my girl upset and I’ll break your jaw.” Jean hissed.

“Jeez, I got it!” Connie grumbled, rolling his eyes as his thumbs whirled over the joysticks of the controller. He knew Jean could do that but he never took him seriously.

“I’m being serious, Con. She was real torn up about it.” Jean said sternly.

Connie was getting sick of Jean. He let out a sigh as he paused the game to turn to face his best friend.

“Hypothetically speaking, why is it such a big deal if I didn’t like her? Huh?”

Jean groaned.

“She’s a little sensitive. But that’s just how I like her alright? How’d you feel if I was being a dick to your girl?” Jean responded, scowling.

Connie pursed his lips together. Jean did have a point.

Back to current events, he eyed you as you were perched on Jean’s thigh.

“You jealous, Connie?~” You teased in a sing-song as you ruffled Jean’s sandy brown tresses.

“He got a pretty girl and don’t know how to act no more.” He chuckled to himself. “Try n keep the noise down.”

“I’d let her fuck you, y’know.” Jean said with a smirk.

Connie’s jaw went slack, disbelieving what he had just heard right now.

“…Huh?”

“Well, yeah.” Jean shrugged. “My baby thinks you’re cute, and I’d let her do anything she wants. Right, honey?” Jean said airily, as he leaned in to bite your neck, causing you to jolt and giggle in his lap.

“Jean..!” You whined, sensitive to the graze of his sharp teeth.

“You’ve gotta be messing with me right now.” Connie said, struggling to keep composure as all his prior fantasies of you hit him like a truck.

“No, Con..”

Why do you say his name like that? Connie internally cried to himself. It wasn’t helping douse the flame of his attraction to you whatsoever.

“I think you’re a cutie pie. I wanna have some fun too, I think you’d both do a good job of spoiling me, huh?” You beamed, your hand on the nape of Jean’s neck as you raked your fingers through the ends of his mullet.

Jean dug the heel of his palm into your clothed core, eliciting a moan from you.

“See how sexy she sounds, Con?” Jean grinned wolfishly as he continued to apply pressure, making you squirm and involuntarily buck your hips into his hand, seeking more. “You wanna make her moan too?”

Connie was in a state of complete and utter disbelief. Regardless, his eyes glazed over as he nodded.

“That’s my guy.” Jean said triumphantly, within an instant, he threw you into the air and caught you bridal style, laughter overtaking your body as you draped your arms around Jean’s neck.

The dim light of the bedside table in Jean’s bedroom illuminated both of the men’s eyes.

You were just so damn gorgeous, they stood side by side as you looked at them coquettishly through your lashes.

You began to pull down the straps of your romper, sliding it off until it was around your waist.

Connie felt as if he died and gone to heaven when he gaped at your bare chest.

“Which one of you wanna start..?” You questioned, a smile tugging at the corner of your lips, thrilled at the idea of both of them about to treat you.

Jean patted Connie’s back.

“Go on. Make my princess moan, hm?” He chuckled, as he began to tug his navy blue shirt over his head and tossed it across the room, revealing his lithe and toned figure.

Connie’s tongue dragged over his lips as he fully took in your appearance.

It wasn’t as if Connie was some inexperienced virgin with no play. It was just an uncanny situation.

Jean and you were so eager to do this, he felt as if there had to be some sort of catch.

“Hi handsome…” You cooed as Connie got on his knees on the carpet of the bedroom, between your legs, you gently smoothed his head and rested your hand on the nape of his neck. “Strip for me?”

He nodded, instantly discarding his shirt and shrugging out of his shorts until he was in his boxers.

“Ah, so there is a bit of muscle here?” You smiled as your palm slid down Connie’s broad chest. You raked your nails across his skin, earning a soft grunt from him.

“Not as good as mine though, huh babe?” Jean chuckled.

“Shut. Up.” Connie said through gritted teeth, then turned his attention back to you.

Testing the waters, Connie settled his hands on the bare skin of your hips, it wasn’t some sort of wet dream. This was reality, so he gripped your flesh, as his brown eyes took you in.

You were gazing at him so fondly, his heart was racing and the tips of his ears went red.

“Just do what comes naturally, okay?” You reassured him as you stroked the back of his neck again.

“…Okay, Y/N.”

Connie fluttered his eyes shut as he began to gently peck upwards along your soft stomach.

You let out a content sigh.

“Con…” You breathed out, revelling in his soft touch. It spurred him on, and Connie felt accomplished that something small already made you so reactive.

Jean grinned as he leaned in, standing next to the bed to press his lips against your neck, his hand wandering down your body to cup your breast, rolling your nipples between his fingers.

“Keep goin’ Con, she’s liking it.” Jean chuckled as you mewled and scrunched your eyes shut.

Connie nodded and latched his mouth onto the other breast, flicking your nipple with the tip of his tongue as his hands still gripped your hips.

He felt more bold now, and he yanked the romper off completely.

“No panties?” Connie chuckled darkly, as he licked his lips at the sight of your pussy, slightly slimy from your arousal from both of their ministrations. “Who knew your girl was so dirty?”

“Why do you think I’m all over her?” Jean responded as he wrapped his large hand around your throat, his thumb and forefinger gripping your jaw. “You’re such a little slut, aren’t you honey?”

You nodded, mind dazed from the pleasure and dirty words.

“Mhm, yes…I’m a slut.” You mustered out.

Connie felt a bit more eased in, his apprehension and frigidness fading away.

He looked up at you with a grin, big brown eyes sparkling with excitement as he spread your legs apart, giving your inner thighs a gentle lick and kissing them.

“Please…” You whimpered.

Jean grinned against your neck.

“Please, what, baby? You want us to keep going?" He took one of your earlobes between his teeth and tugged gently. “Tell us what you want."

“Want you both…make me feel good.” You breathed out shakily.

“You heard her, Jean.” Connie grinned.

Connie was in his element. He loved going down on a girl. He was smiling from ear to ear as he was given a front view of your slick folds.

His breath fanned over your wet heat, and your eyebrows furrowed together in impatience.

“Stop teasin’!” You whined.

“Jean, is she always this impatient?” Connie snorted, amused by how desperate you were.

“It’s cute..” Jean shook his head laughing. “But yeah, my princess is pretty spoilt.”

Connie delved in between your legs, his tongue flicking over your clit eagerly, weaving expertly within the crevices of your wet flesh.

Your moans only spurred him on even more, he latched on and sucked harshly. Connie grinned deviously at the sound of your desperate pleas.

He teased you more before leaning down to lavishly kiss and lick between your thighs.

Jean still palming and kneading your breasts, sliding his large hands along your sides pinching your nipples as he worked to fulfil you.

Connie’s tongue played along your folds, circling your clit a few times, he was overjoyed with the way your body reacted to his every touch and tease.

“Don’t forget about me, baby.” Jean murmured as he tilted your head up to meet your lips hungrily, moving against you as he sucked your lower lip.

Pleasure circulated through your veins as the two men were consumed with satisfying you.

“Con…” You groaned as you felt your high approach you. “S’close.”

Connie grinned and quickened his movements, licking and sucking on your clit, sending waves of ecstasy throughout your body.

"Just let go, princess," He whispered against you, his tongue and lips still working away. "We've got you."

Your voice was hoarse as you sobbed, and your hips bucked violently. Body shuddering as a stream of clear liquid gushed into Connie’s mouth.

“That’s it, there we go…” Jean grinned triumphantly as he felt your body go limp in his arms.

He continued to lick and suck at your sensitive spots, drawing out every last drop of your orgasm.

“Let it all out for me." Connie murmured encouragingly.

“Alright, alright. Get to the back.” Jean chuckled. “How sweet does she taste?”

Connie stood up from his knees, savoring your essence.

“Nothing like it.” He chuckled as he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.

You and Jean shared a look, and you immediately despite being shaky from the intense orgasm, got on all fours on the mattress.

Jean crouched to cup the side of your face as he pecked your lips.

“Eyes on me, baby. Remember who you belong to.”

“I know, Jean…” You mumbled.

“Good girl..” He smiled as he kissed you once more. “You’re doin’ so well. Isn’t she, Con?”

Connie nodded, as he fumbled for a condom and rolled it over his length throbbing.

“The best.”

Connie trailed kisses down your back, stopping at the small of your back causing you to shiver.

Pulling down his boxers, his hardening cock springing free Jean stroked himself a few times.

“You ready for us, angel?” Jean whispered huskily.

“Yes, I want you both.”

“Course you do, you little whore.” Connie cackled as he smacked your ass, biting his lip at the recoil.

Your eyes met Jean’s as you fisted his girthy cock, your thumb rubbing and giving kitten licks to the sensitive skin earning a guttural groan right from his chest.

You almost paused as from behind, you felt Connie teasingly rub his latex-covered length along your slit.

“F-fuck! CONNIE!” You gasped out, pussy still sensitive from his mouth earlier.

“Shit, Con..” Jean chuckled, voice strained as he felt your breath on his slit. “You’re behind and she’s still calling your name.”

“Guess I’m her fave.” Connie smirked as he finally slid into your warm, wet walls.

“Y-you wish.” You mustered out, but you couldn’t deny Connie had surprised you.

You took Jean into your mouth and his fingers tangled in your hair.

“Shit, princess…” Jean heaved out as your tongue swirled around, making his cock slick with your saliva.

Connie began to move, his hips thrusting hard and fast, you were reduced to incoherent babbling.

“You like that, baby?" Connie growled hotly against your ear, wanting to one-up Jean. "You want more?"

“S’much more..!”

“You're so fucking sexy." He panted out between thrusts.

Jean moaned softly as you sucked him off, his fingers tangling violently in your hair.

Connie grunted as he continued to thrust into you, his hands leaving bruises on your hips.

"Fuck, angel," Jean growled through gritted teeth. "You're so damn good at this. That mouth of yours."

Jean’s fingers gripped with each bob of your head. His eyes were dark with desire and he watched you hungrily as Connie fucked you relentlessly.

“Let me finish in that mouth, honey.” Jean stuttered, feeling his high approach him.

"I'm gonna cum. Swallow it, baby. Take it all." Jean’s teeth sinking into his lower lip as he reached his climax, his warm seed spilling into your waiting mouth.

He panted and stroked your cheek gently as he came down from his orgasm, his softening length sliding out of your mouth with a wet pop.

Without hesitation, you swallowed his cum. Jean gave a greasy smile as his thumb slipped past your lips, prying your jaw open.

“All gone, huh?” Jean grinned, admiring your tongue. “Such a dirty girl.”

You screwed your eyes shut as Connie drove deeper inside of you, your walls pulsating around him.

Your fists bunched up the sheets as Connie groaned.

The both of your moans blending simultaneously reached the peak of their pleasure, Connie spilling into the latex.

He gasped as Jean pulled you towards him, the loss of warmth making you whimper as Jean pulled you close onto him.

Your arms draped over Jean’s shoulders as you felt overwhelmed in a good way.

Jean began to kiss your temple and rubbed small circles into your back.

“Feel good, princess…?” Jean smiled as he stroked your cheek. “Did you enjoy yourself?”

You nodded, then turned to Connie with a lazy grin.

“But he was my fave.” You giggled, Jean pinching your hip.

“Hey!”

author’s note: showed connie a bit more love in this since i barely write for his ass & we have enough horse cock in this blog. if u reached this far tysm for reading, reblogs & interactions r always appreciated

[cinnbar-bun]

Unrefined

Pairing: P5 Protag x GN!Reader (Ren Amamiya is used as his name)

Summary: Ren is happy to see you again after being separated from you for many years since you two were children. However, he knows he's not exactly the best choice for a boyfriend. In order to look cool, he tries to approach you as Joker.

Of course, reality isn't always that easy and he learns that looking cool isn't the most important thing when it comes to love and friendships.

Rating: G

A/n: Ahhhh I'm loving P5R and I'm loving Ren very much!

Ren was many things growing up. He was rather lackadaisical, unsure of himself, and oftentimes, just plain messy. He was caring and sweet, but his airheadedness had, on multiple occasions, led to some awkward encounters with other people. It was mostly through growing up together that you had understood what he really meant, but not everyone was willing to make the time. 

You two had been inseparable as kids, always doing everything with one another. You had seen each other at your most awkward and weirdest- like when you got braces or when he broke his arm trying to do cool moves on the jungle gym. You dressed up in matching costumes and outfits for all sorts of events. He even took you to the middle school dance when no one else bothered with you two. You shared your dreams, worst nightmares, struggles- everything. 

Yet, that connection had to be strained when your parents were relocated to Tokyo for work. 

His home just wasn’t the same without you. So you two tried to keep contact with each other every day. Texting, calling, sending emails or doing video calls together was such a normal part of his routine. 

He told you about how your old home was doing, anything new that was going (there was rarely anything new, though) so a majority of it was spent discussing Tokyo. 

“You’d never believe all the lights! It’s crazy bright over here.” 

“Yeah, I don’t think I can. Sounds like a hassle, though. Aren’t all those people and lights annoying?” 

You only laughed at his response- of course shy and withdrawn Ren would never love a city like this. 

Years passed and you two did your best to continue talking, but slowly every day became every other day, to maybe once a week, to sporadically whenever. There was just a lot to deal with, and life at Shujin Academy was anything but easy. He just had to settle for brief text messages and possible calls and gifts for things like birthdays and holidays. 

He was stressed after his hearing, so he broke his personal rule of trying to leave you some space to send a message. 

Hey it’s kinda urgent do you have time to call? 

“Hey, Ren, what’s u-,” you gasped. You looked at him like he was an alien from outer space, and he figured it must be because of how awful he looked right now. 

“Something wrong? You just stopped talking,” he commented. 

“Yeah, I’m fine. Sorry. What’s up? You said it was urgent. Are you doing okay?” You sent a barrage of questions his way and Ren slid a hand through his hair. 

“Want the good news or bad news first?” He responded, ignoring your questions. 

“Um…” you rose an eyebrow at what he could have possibly done to warrant this question. “Bad first?” 

“I’m on probation.” 

“WHAT?” You screamed, yet Ren didn’t flinch. “What do you mean probation? What the hell did you do?” 

“Some asshole framed me for assault when I was protecting a woman,” he casually answered, as if it was just a normal occurrence for him. 

“Seriously? And you still got in trouble?” 

“Yeah. It sucks, honestly,” he sighed. 

“Jeez I’m…” You looked crestfallen at his explanation and he felt bad he made you feel so glum. “I’m sorry.” 

“Not your fault. Besides, there’s some good news.” 

“What’s the good news? Please don’t give me another heart attack.” 

“I’m moving to Tokyo. Some guy my parents are friends with is taking me in while I’m on probation. And I’m going to that Sunshine Academy you go to.” 

“It’s Shujin, for one thing,” you corrected him. “But you’re really coming to Tokyo? Oh my gosh, it’s gonna be like the old times again! I have so many places to show you and take you! You’re gonna love it, I promise.”

“Eh, I dunno. I’m just gonna try and avoid those places. Sorry, I know you probably wanted it to be super fun and all, but I don’t wanna go to jail. It’s a miracle they even left me with only probation. I’m even donning a disguise.” 

“A disguise? What do you mean?” 

He pulled up a pair of black, thick-framed glasses. 

You pinched the bridge of your nose and shook your head. 

“That’s not a disguise. Come on, Ren, you can’t be serious.” 

“I am. Look,” he put the glasses on and you stared at him deeply. You looked deep in thought and he wondered what was crossing your mind. “See? No one would punch a guy with glasses.” 

“You’re hopeless,” you chuckled at his antics. 

“But you still love me, right?” He whined, pouting like a child. 

“Of course,” you said, the words slipping right out of you. A warm smile crept on your lips as you gazed at him. “So… when you come to Tokyo, I’ll make sure you have the best probation ever. You can even visit my house. It’s got a nice view of the city and we have a great diner nearby.” 

He smiled for what felt like the first time in a while since this miserable incident. 

“Thanks, (Y/n), I know I can always count on you.” 

A few more pleasantries were exchanged and you two logged off, leaving him staring alone at his own reflection from his computer. He looked down at himself and frowned. 

Great, he was going to see his best friend (and crush) for the first time in years, and it’s because he was accused of committing a crime. In some ways, though, he felt safe with you and could put his probation aside. 

He hoped you would continue to be his friend in Tokyo. It was probably going to be a long year there, and he wasn’t looking forward to all the judgmental people. So much for being a guy you could depend on. Just like always, you were the one who would have to help him and accept him. He wished he was not this lame dude who couldn’t even handle a few rumors, but this isolation was killing him.

----

Ren always knew he wasn’t the most attractive guy ever. Or the smartest. Or the most courageous or confident. Barely had any talents or future aspirations beyond “just make it to the weekend”. He was pretty below-average, all things considered. And he was honest about that, like he was with pretty much everything else. He didn’t like beating around the bush or lying to others. 

Sadly, his big mouth got him into this probation (he still didn’t regret it) but man, it was exhausting to try and bite his tongue back at every opportunity. 

He couldn’t fight back or argue when the people made audacious claims about him. Couldn’t say a thing when people purposefully riled him up to get him to act out. Ren couldn’t even properly ask out the best friend he had loved since they were kids. Nor could he defend them whenever someone tried to spread rumors about them because of their association with him. 

But, that was Ren. 

Joker, however, was a completely different story. Joker was cool, suave, elegant- everything the clumsy second-year wasn’t. He could flirt with monsters and defeat evil while looking completely badass doing it. 

But it’s not like he could be Joker all the time, not with the Phantom Thieves working in the shadows and him still being under the watchful eye of almost everyone in society. He had to keep it quiet. 

Joker was Ren’s safe space to act out and be the man he wished to be. No one knew who he was, no one held any expectations for him- they just knew he was there to get the job done. And he did it, flawlessly, every time. 

Which is why it was frustrating Ren would get so tongue-tied the minute he wished to talk to you. 

The years were kind to you- very kind to you, actually- and he marveled at how you grew to be more confident and proud than when you were younger. You had a steady head on your shoulders, leading you to be the secretary of the student council and great in your club activities. 

He wished he could spill everything to you, everything about the Phantom Thieves, the Metaverse, personas- it would be so much easier if you knew. But he knew that if he bothered, you would simply laugh and say he probably was pounding too many energy drinks. None of it was believable, even to his own self. 

He hated lying to you, he despised it so much, but you were too understanding to call him out on his bullshit. You knew he was lying through his teeth about being ‘busy’, and he knew you were lying when you would smile and say you were ‘fine’ when he would miss out on another outing. 

He didn’t know how to make it up to you or truly admit he was the Phantom Thief that had grown so popular. 

He had brought this question up to his team members, and frankly, all of them were sending mixed signals. 

“Do not reveal your identity to them! They could be a traitor and rat us all out! Or worse, they could try and use you!” Makoto would say. 

“You should totally reveal it! And you love them a lot, right? Maybe you can make it up to them by taking them to an all-you-can-eat buffet with extra dessert!” Ann squealed. 

“No, make it meat! They gotta love that, right?” Ryuji would add. 

“I would say a buffet is not classy enough. You wish to showcase your heart’s true intentions to them, no? You should whisk them away to a beautiful resort and craft a gorgeous jewel that they can wear to remind them of you and-” 

“Yusuke… you do recognize Ren is a poor high school kid, right?” Futaba raised an eyebrow. “I don’t think he even has a dollar to his name, right now.” 

“I have twenty dollars to my name, thank you very much,” Ren corrected. “Wait- no- that’s not the point.” 

And then he was back to square one. Sure, he read Reckless Casanova and The Art of Charm, and it did help as Joker, but he was helpless when it came to you. 

There’s no way you’d like whimpering, pathetic Ren, especially when compared to the city boys of Tokyo, who were way flashier, energetic, and could treat you right. Unlike him, who couldn’t even say a word when people smeared your name. 

That’s when a thought came to mind- he should confess to you as Joker! Joker was everything Ren was not, and you’d surely fall for him, right? All he’d have to do is play it cool as Joker, and you’d be swooning for him in no time!

He imagined the scenario in his head.

You were there, sitting in your dark room with your balcony window open. He would jump through the buildings and smoothly glide to your balcony. You would be breathless at the sight of this handsome phantom thief, who looked so similar to someone you knew, but unlike him, this man was cooler. Better. Smarter. He was the entire package. 

You would be crying over that lame good-for-nothing boy who gave you nothing but trouble, and Joker would wipe your tears away. 

Perhaps he’d say a really nice line in French to really hammer in the ‘phantom thief’ act. You’d embrace him and he’d confess your undying love to him, and you would accept it in a heartbeat. 

Yeah, this plan had zero chance of failing. 

----

Ren, donning his disguise and mask, descended upon your rooftop. He made sure to be as quiet as possible, hoping to fulfill the dream movie scenario he had planned up. It was foolproof, he’d smugly thought. 

As he was preparing to jump down to your balcony, he noticed something shuffling near him. 

Was it someone watching him? He turned back to see a group of rats in the darkness, watching him. 

“Shoo! Go away!” He swatted at them. Some went scrambling and he thought he was in the clear. That was until he heard their chittering and squeaking. The group had ran back to him and were hissing at him, and he brought out his dagger. “Shit-!” 

The rats lunged at him and he quickly jumped down on your balcony to avoid getting bitten by one of them. He crashed onto the floor and groaned in pain, cursing the rats and the concrete of the balcony. 

He heard some shuffling and the balcony door swung open, revealing a very angry you with your cellphone at your side. 

“Wonder what-” you screamed as you locked eyes with him, and slammed the door shut. “Who the hell are you?! Get the hell out of here or I’m calling the police!” 

You typed something on your phone and Ren was panicking. Shit, he couldn’t mess up or get caught by the police. That would ruin his life and everyone else in the Phantom Thieves’s life. 

“W-wait! S’il vous plait!” He screeched one of the few phrases of French he knew. He slapped himself internally at the fact he even used French when you were trying to call the cops. 

Great job, brainiac. 

You seemed taken aback by him until you put your phone down and raised a knowing eyebrow at him. 

“Ren? What are you doing?” You asked.

Now he was in deep shit. He quickly stood up and posed by the balcony, as if he was just casually strolling by. 

“I don’t know who-” Crap, I can’t use my voice. He cleared his throat and tried to make it deeper. “Uh, I mean, I don’t know who this ‘Ren’ person is.” 

You looked unimpressed, and he knew his cover was blown. 

“Ren, what’s with the get up and trying to break into my house?” 

“I assure you, (Y/n), I was not trying to break into your house!” He answered in his fake, deep voice. 

You strode over to him, and he leaned back into the balcony ledge, trying to avoid touching you. 

Too close! Too fast! Shit! Abort! Abort! Abort mission! We’ll get them next time!

“So, mysterious stranger who is not Ren,” you sarcastically began, “what are you doing here?” 

You stepped closer and he leaned closer against the edge. He peered down and saw how far below the sidewalk was and gulped. 

“I-I am- gah!” He felt his body slip over the ledge after he tried to lean against it. He yelped and quickly brought out his grappling hook and shot it to your balcony, before slinging himself back up. 

He sat on the ledge, crossing his leg over the other and running a hand through his hair as if he wasn’t about to fall to his death just seconds before. 

“I couldn’t help but um, couldn’t help but be taken aback with your beauty, mon amour!” He dramatically stated, winking at you and handing you a (crumpled) rose he had picked out earlier for this very moment. 

Unlike in the dream sequence he conjured up, you were not breathless or swooning- instead, you were laughing. 

“Oh my gosh, Ren, what the hell is all this?” You said in between bouts of laughter. 

Normally, he loved your laugh, but in this situation, he felt his pride crumble to dust. 

“I… I, uh…” Not even Joker could save him. He could practically hear Arsene in the back of his head howling in laughter at the way he messed up. 

Ren sighed and took off the mask. 

“Yeah, okay, you figured it out, it’s me,” he said, defeated and exhausted. You wiped the tears out of your eyes and examined him. 

“Wait, no way! You’re part of the Phantom Thieves-” you loudly exclaimed, and Ren shushed you quickly. 

“You can’t reveal it out loud! I’m not even supposed to be here!” 

“Sorry,” you complied, whispering to him. “You’re part of the Phantom Thieves?” 

He nodded. 

“Yes, you’re looking at the leader of them.” 

“No way…” You stared, gobsmacked. 

“Listen, I get it, it’s hard to believe and you may think I’m crazy but-” 

“Huh? This explains everything!” You grinned. “I just… I just thought you were avoiding me and didn’t wanna see me again. You avoided me for so long and always hung out with the others, I assumed you got tired of me! But really, you were a part of the Ph-” 

“Shhhh! Not so loud!” He whisper-shouted. 

You fanned yourself and he noticed your eyes were becoming wet with tears. Your face was turning red and you were straining yourself to not cry.

“Crap, I didn’t mean to make you cry,” he apologized. “This wasn’t how I wanted this to go…” 

“Well, you idiot, of course you make me cry. We were best friends and this whole time I thought you hated me. Why didn’t you just tell me sooner? Why didn’t you trust me? Did you think I would have told on you? And now you’re coming here randomly at night and pretending you’re not even you! Don’t you know how that looks to me?” 

“I know, I know I…” he shamefully looked at the ground. “I know. I messed up. I messed up really bad but that’s why I came. I didn’t know who to trust, and I didn’t want you to get hurt because of me. And I see that I was the fool for not believing in you to begin with. You were always too good for me, (Y/n). So I wanted to be upfront with you and give you this.” 

Ren extended his hand to show the broken rose again as he rubbed the back of his neck. 

“I’m not perfect. I’m not as handsome, or as rich, or as cool as the other guys and I am a huge coward. I run at every opportunity. But I wanted to have you see me as… you know… someone better than me. Someone who could treat you right, defend you, and not have you always try to care for them. I know I’ve been an asshole, and I wanted to fix it. I wanted to just be someone you could rely on for a moment. Because you mean the world to me. Always have.” 

You gasped and he looked at you to see your reaction. A few tears had fallen down your cheek and you covered your mouth in shock. 

“Sorry, I know you’re probably upset so I’ll leave-” he began, putting a leg over the ledge to jump down when you grabbed him. 

“D-don’t walk away, idiot! You didn’t even let me respond!” You shouted tearfully. He settled back onto the balcony and you threw your arms around him. “You’re really dense. You’re not a bother to me and I don’t want anyone but you. I don’t want this Joker guy, or those other people in our school. I just want you, Ren. Did you really think I would continue hoping for you to see me more if I didn’t care for you? Did you really think I would wait around for just about anybody?” 

Now he felt his face heat up. 

“Wait, you mean it? You like me too?” His gray eyes sparkled under the moonlight and his smile was wide. He must have looked so stupid, but he didn’t care at this moment. He was just happy you didn’t hate him and actually liked him!

“Yes, but if you wanna make it up to me, you have to promise something.” You pushed yourself off of him for a brief moment and had a serious look on your face. 

“Anything.” 

“No more lying to me like that. Please don’t hide things from me.” 

“I promise.” 

“Good. Don’t underestimate the both of us together. I rely on you just as much as you rely on me, silly. You don’t have to be anything other than you. I like how dorky and lame you are sometimes.” 

Ren let out an offended gasp. 

“I’m not dorky!” You smirked and pulled him down by the collar. He felt his heart race a mile a minute and he was curious what you were going to do next. 

“Shut up and kiss me already, Ren,” you laughed, and he felt himself melt at the sound of your voice. 

“Of course, my treasure,” he grinned as he tried to go through every tip those romantic books wrote in his head. 

He pressed his lips against yours gently, almost unsure if he should even go through with it. You kissed him back and he felt himself slowly let go of his insecurities and enjoy your presence like this. 

The need for air arose so he (unfortunately) separated himself from you. You laughed quietly as you stared into his eyes, and he wanted to memorize every detail about you. 

“You kiss a bit too well, Ren, don’t tell me you practiced with someone else?” You teased. 

“N-no I just… read a lot of books.” You snorted at his response and pressed a kiss to his nose. 

“Gosh, you’re the best. Don’t tell me you also learned your terrible French from those books too?” 

“Maybe…” 

Sure he wasn’t perfect, but in this moment. There was nobody he’d rather be than himself in all his imperfect glory.

[latenightbreezeinheaven]

Predicting my 2023 solar return chart because I couldn’t sleep😴

2023 solar return chart is looking too much scary and crazy for me. My birthday is in June and it’s 2 months ahead but I think the effects have already started to show up in some areas of my life at this moment.

•Scorpio rising at 18 degrees (Virgo deg)

-I think this year, I would be mainly focused on transformations for myself, emotionally and physically.

-I went through a very intense and messy breakup and I found myself reflecting these circumstances a lot lately.

-I’ve been watching videos about self-concept, psychology and manifestation on youtube because I actually want to transform myself and I have a feeling I would succeed.

-I want to transform myself into someone who’s powerful with a lil bit of mysterious aura.🤭

-I started to take interest in occult and metaphysical topics and witchy stuff.

-I bought my first tarot deck about two weeks ago just because my gut told me to do it.

-I started to rely a lot on my intuition and most of them are on point.

-I had some prophetic dreams which came true in real life. (thanks to my natal Neptune and Uranus in 8th house too) IT’S KINDA CRAZY. THAT DREAM HAPPENED EXACTLY IN MY REALITY.🤯

-I notice that I also tend to become more private on social media and I back away from people, even from my best friend who I used to talk with everyday because I feel so drained for literally no reason. (but maybe this solar eclipse and mercury retrograde are the hidden answer😏)

-I’ve been getting lots of compliments too. One of my guy friends told me that I look like a maneater in these days. (I just had leo rising in 2022 SR chart and my attention-seeking ass is enjoying this too much hehe🙊)

-The MAIN reason why I’m scared of scorpio rising in SR chart is because I was bullied at school, got slapped by my mom, sexually harassed and these all happened for the very first time in my life and also my biggest secret got exposed (which was kinda like receiving karma for what I had done) in the year I had scorpio rising.😃

-The rising degree was at 29 degrees and I was slut-shamed publicly. (❗️Tip: if you have 29 degrees on planets or points in your solar return chart, that might indicate the end of a chapter and a new beginning, for better or worse depends on what you have done and the planet shows in which area you’ll encounter these endings).

-All students knew my name but in a notorious way like “oh that girl? Ummm🙄 *shrugs*”. -These events brought major changes into my life. It changed my whole personality.

-I was scared and in the dark for the whole year. But to face my foes, I had to put on that “I’m fucking strong bitches don’t you dare touch me” mask the whole year. No one was on my side. But these events helped me become a girl who I am right now. I used to be a fun, outgoing, optimistic, free, flirty and giggling little girl but right now, I’m not that kind of girl anymore. I’ve become a brave and strong girl who had gone through a lot but still didn’t give up. However, I have never shown my vulnerable side to anyone up to this day since that year. That year is the year that I’ll NEVER forget. And that’s why I’m feeling a bit nervous to go through another year with scorpio rising.😰

-I might receive karma for what I had done. Good or bad.

-I might also attract a lot of unwanted attention from others since I also have Venus conjunct mars and Lilith conjunct MC this year. Main theme is transformation and shocking things might also happen. My secrets could be leaked maybe. Just don’t wanna assume things before anything happens.🥱

•Sun in Gemini in 8th house at 24 degrees (Pisces deg)

-This year is literally screaming “TIME TO TRANSFORM YOU BITCH” at my face lol😂. -My main focus is gonna be healing ofc and transformation I guess.

-I might have to face my shadow side and I think the universe will push me to deal with it to achieve my higher self.

-I also kinda observe things deeply a lot nowadays and it could go on for the whole year.

-I feel like I might go through my ego death or as I said, an old chapter could end and new beginnings would come.

-I’m a bit worried about me and my family’s health. I’ve been feeling ill for quite some time now due to low blood pressure. I’m also worried about my parents especially my dad because idk I just feel something weird but let’s not think about it because I don’t wanna manifest anything bad to him.🥺

-I’m not going to predict further about this because I’ve said enough above as this is quite similar to scorpio rising. My main focus is 8th house and scorpio themed.🖤

•Sun conjunct Juno

-People say this is like “meeting your soulmate” aspect of the year. I hope I would meet someone too whether it’s platonic or romantic because it’s fun to interact with new people.😺

•Sun square Neptune

-My creation skills could be kinda blocked. It’s happening even right now. In the past, when I started to write about something, the words just naturally flew out of my head but right now, I’m a bit stuck and delayed. My thoughts are delayed. I even forget how to structure sentences creatively.

•Moon in Taurus in 7th house at 21 degrees (Sag deg)

-My emotions could be mainly invested in relationships and partnerships.

-I could be thinking a lot about how to get better in relationships and any-ships.

-I just hope I won’t be lost in love again but I’m pretty sure I definitely won’t too.🤡

-Btw, I love having moon at sagittarius degree because it might mean I would feel optimistic and free like a little girl version of me before 2019!

•Moon conjunct Uranus

-Mood swings. URGH. I don’t even need to predict this because they’re already happening. I have daily mood swings but I notice that since about the start of April, I’ve become so much unstable and inconsistent in my emotions. One minute I’m on instagram and another minute, I’m on google. Another minute I’m on tumblr and I just keep jumping from one tab to another A LOT.

-I also feel quite chaotic and confused about some of my relationships. I love my best friend one minute and another minute, I kinda reconsider if she’s really good for me or not. And I just feel exhausted just by existing.😮‍💨

•Mercury in Gemini in 7th house at 6 degrees (Virgo deg)

-Idk how to interpret this. Please HELP kindly if you can. Thank you! Maybe share your experiences?❤️

•Venus in Leo in 9th house at 8 degrees (Scorpio deg)

-I love having Venus in 9th house when it comes to SR charts. I had this placement in 2022 and man, I had 3 trips in one year and all of those were amazing times for me. It’s pleasant and I felt so excited by those adventures.

-Needless to say, I also met my ex in college (actually the first time we ever met was in 2019, at a language school but we met again in college🙄) and somehow most of my relationships were based in college and they’re going to go more for another 7 years so you can say they’re quite significant.

-So, I think I might also get a boyfriend or boyfriendS from college this year. Or else it could be through traveling, education and religious places.

-I might find aesthetics in learning about spirituality and might be focused and might have fixated opinions on my belief system related to religion (as it is in leo).

-I started to become more religious in these days and I also started to stand firm in what I believe instead of being a people-pleaser and saying “oh I also believe that” to every opinion existing.👏🏻

•Venus conjunct mars

-Yayyy people say this is the year I’m getting most attention from both genders. I mean I don’t like attention that much because it’s draining but who doesn’t love being put in a spotlight if it’s for good? (at this point my natal sun in 12th house being indecisive if he likes attention or not)🤦🏻‍♀️

-I love receiving love from people so this is a great placement for me.

-And also, my sexual energy can be highly increased this year.😶

-I might have several options for romantic partners and might come out more charming and alluring than usual.

•Venus opposite Pluto

-Kinda scared again because my SR chart ruler is in hard aspect with SR Venus which is in 9th house.

-I hope communication between peers would go well and relationships won’t be destroyed because of misunderstandings in communication.

-Idk why but I have this gut feeling that I’m going to attract someone or be attracted to someone who’s manipulative, toxic and jealous. Or I might be the one who would be obsessed with someone having all of those plutonic qualities. My relationships could be pluto-themed and transformative I guess.

-Some people say that this is also an indicator of glow-up in SR chart and I find this pretty accurate because I’m going to the gym for the first time in July!🤩

•Venus conjunct vertex

-Fated love? Fated relationships? Can be through 9th house related places and the other person may have leo or taurus qualities. Or the meeting could be leo-themed I guess?

•Mars in Leo in 9th house at 14 degrees (Taurus deg)

-This can mean I would put a lot of effort into college and it can be true because I have my final exams in June and I have to sweat my ass off for that.😵

-I might be rethinking about my belief system and replanning about my education too.

-As I have my natal mars in natal 9th house, I kinda like this placement because it’s friendly to me.

-I might seek for freedom and would cancel anyone who’s blocking me from becoming confident and free.

-I might go under a sexual encounter which may be brief but transformative. Or maybe one-night stand LMAO (jk I don’t like one-night stands personally).

-I’m a virgin so I’m even a bit curious if I’m going to lose my virginity this year because I have a very strong gut feeling about having first sex with someone who’s important for me.😭👀

•Mars conjunct vertex

-Fated sexual encounter maybe. Maybe fated accidents? Lol I’m sorry I don’t wanna manifest accidents for myself haha😂 But personal planets in conjunction with vertex can also mean fated people might be brought to our life to teach us something, both karmic and non-karmic ones, eg like a teacher or a mentor.

•Mars conjunct Lilith

-I have a very strong gut feeling that I’m gonna gain lots of sexual attention or might attract aggressive partners who want to tame me (sorry guys but my Lilith in 1st house won’t let it happen🤗).

-I might become comfortable and have courage enough to express my sexuality.

-May have power struggles with authority figures.

-I notice that I’ve been feeling like “who are you to judge me bastards” towards controlling authority figures.🌝

•Mars conjunct MC

-I might work hard to reach my goals.

-I might also appear assertive, daring and competitive in public.

-This is also special because my natal MC ruler is mars and it is now highlighted in my SR chart.

-I’m going to the gym for the first time in July too so maybe people would see me athletic and confident this year.

•Jupiter in Taurus in 6th house at 6 degrees (Virgo deg)

-Jupiter is about expansion and luck so, I might gain luck and blessings through my health, my routines, my colleagues (but for me, friends).

-I just wish I won’t gain weight because Jupiter sometimes indicates weight gains and 6th house is health and physical house thank god I’m going to the gym.

-My health could become better BUT since both Venus and mars square Jupiter, love and sex might deteriorate my health in some way - idk how to interpret this.🧘🏻‍♀️

•Pluto in Capricorn in 3rd house at 29 degrees (Leo deg)

-Transformations could arise around siblings, neighborhood, education, short trips, knowledge and communication.

-I also have my natal chart ruler in my natal 3rd house so this energy is quite familiar for me but let’s see how Pluto energy would go this year. (i had Pluto in 6th house last year and I had eating disorder LMAO🤧)

•North node in Taurus in 6th house at 3 degrees (Gemini deg)

-My purpose might be to take care of myself- my health mainly as I said that my health is not so good in these days.

-Also it could be showing that I need to reconstruct my daily routines and abandon every bad habit that is no longer serving me. Maybe I might need to balance my studies and my relaxation time.

•Uranus-moon conjunction conjuncts descendant

-There could be unexpected and sudden changes, events occurring in my relationships. -I feel like I might go into a romantic relationship but that won’t be committed or at least, it would be weird and unusual. Not traditional and maybe shocking too. I might be the one who’s not willing to commit because right now, I have zero desire to start another relationship. Tbh, my ex is still in a part of me and I need to cut him off first. I might attract unconventional people too.

•Lilith conjunct MC

-I started to feel a bit outcasted since my breakup and it became worse. My ex has a new girlfriend now but she and her friends are gossiping about me. I heard it through one of my mutual friends and it’s so Lilith-themed in my opinion. They wanna slut-shame me for no reason. I don’t know why but when other girls kiss their boyfriends, they seem pretty normal. When I kiss my boyfriend, I suddenly become like a slut. I also kinda have to put on “Wtf you bitches, seriously!? Sorry but I’m unbothered” mask in college just to defend myself. As a result, I could be seen as someone who’s unapologetic, daring and untamed. Or maybe I might represent Lilith traits unconsciously in this year.🔫

•Part of fortune in libra 11th house at 15 degrees (Gemini deg)

-I might gain luck through friendships, connections with people, humanitarian work, beauty, social media.

•SR ascendant falls into natal 4th house (3 degrees away from 5th house cusp)

-Mainly focused areas - family, past lessons, roots and childhood. Could also be - romance, fun, flings, dates, creativity, children.

•Fixed dominant

-My mind can be fixated and I might stick to one decision only.

•Earth dominant

-I might be a bit stable but Idk how I feel about this one because I also have moon-Uranus conjunction haha

•Taurus stellium

-Love and beauty could be mainly focused? But I love having taurus stellium because I love taurus energy. They look so calm. In my opinion. At least.🌸

•7th house stellium

-Might be “Love is in the air” year for me but I’m closing my nose till my prince charming comes and commits to me fully and gives me princess treatment. Plus, I don’t wanna kiss froggos anymore. Yuck.💀

Anyways, this was a long ass post and I’m so freaking excited for the upcoming year. Afraid, nervous but at the same time, so curious about what might happen because placements in this year’s chart are a bit crazy and intense in my opinion. Also please bear with my grammar mistakes as I’m an ESL student. You can also share your experiences with me if you have had any of these placements in your previous years’ solar return charts. Thank you!❤️

[ridox]

Questions about Xavier & Theories Following Chapter 8 —

I need anyone’s input/theory/thoughts regarding this matter because I haven’t gone through much of Xavier’s Secret Times and Tender Moments yet, and I’ve only unlocked 3/9 of Shooting Stars

Discussion under the cut for potential spoilers

Anyway, I just finished going through Chapter 8 of the Main Story and based from this conversation with Jeremiah. Does this mean Xavier has direct/or indirect influence over what happened to Josephine and Caleb on Chapter 4?

I’m assuming the Nonintervention Principle is for the Lightseekers who venture through space, calling for them to basically NOT ALTER anything in the timeline they’re hopping onto as a preventative measure to creating a butterfly effect (?)

I remember some people saying that Xavier caused the explosion but now that I think about it I don’t think he inherently has anything to do with it. Rather, I think his presence, Jeremiah’s, alongside all the other backtrackers or whatever you call them, is what caused Josephine and Caleb’s death (?)

I have to gather my thoughts for a more concrete theory about this but in essence, the fact that some of the residents of Philos never returned to their own home and their correct timeline… caused a major butterfly effect that essentially kickstarted the catastrophic events that’s happening in MC’s life as of the moment

I feel like Xavier knew what was going to happen to MC’s grandmother and PERHAPS he even knows if Caleb really died or not but he’s bound by this rule to not intervene and to just let it pan out the way it’s supposed to be

Which kinda creates a loophole because his existence itself in this timeline is what caused it to happen in the first place (?) if that specific theory is right

ANYWAY MOVING ON TO MY ACTUAL QUESTIONS —

I remember reading a theory or perhaps an actual explanation that - in an attempt to try and save Queen MC - Xavier created a Möbius Strip that essentially catapults him back in time creating this unending loophole in the Philos timeline

MY QUESTION IS… IS THERE A POSSIBILITY THAT THE MÖBIUS STRIP IN QUESTION IS WHAT RESULTED IN THE DEEPSPACE TUNNEL? OR THE DEEPSPACE TUNNEL ITSELF IS THE MÖBIUS STRIP?

I haven’t done enough research to support this theory because it’s 12 AM and I just finished the chapter and want to document these thoughts but I’m theorizing that Xavier’s effort to save his MC in his own timeline resulted in a time rift in the form of the Deepspace Tunnel.

The same tunnel that was the main reason why MC’s heart got implanted with the Aether Core in the first place. What if the Wanderers that ravaged Linkon City those many years ago were actually Philos citizens (backtrackers, lightseekers) that died during the creation of the tunnel and emerged on the other side as just that… Wanderers?

What if the Wanderer that stabbed current MC through the heart is an alternate timeline/Philos timeline MC who recognized herself and essentially transplanted her heart to hers?

LIKE MY MIND IS GOING MILES AN HOUR THINKING ABOUT THIS BUT I KNOW EVERYTHING’S MESSY AND UNORGANIZED SO LIKE MAYBE I’LL WRITE THIS UP MORE IN THE FUTURE WITH SUPPORTING FACTS AND STUFF

But yeah! To summarize it all —

- Xavier and the rest of the backtrackers/lightseekers in Linkon City are Space and Time anomalies

- Their existence in itself is wrong and is what resulted in the catastrophic event many years ago

- Possibly the Wanderer that pierced current MC’s heart is her from a Philos timeline

- Also Xavier may have been indirectly involve to the death of MC’s grandmother and Caleb

- BUT ALSO I think Xavier knows whether Caleb is truly dead or alive

- Bonus: I feel like Caleb found out that an alternate timeline exists and he had to fake his own death for the sake of MC’s safety

- Just by the end of Chapter 8, everyone was talking about the recent discovery of Philos and imo I feel like this happened prior to Caleb coming home in the first place

- I feel like since Ever pretty much runs everything in Linkon, they tried to sway Caleb into turning MC in for the sake of “research” or something after they found out she’s probably the only living person who fused well with an Aether Core

ANYWAY SORRY FOR THE RAMBLE I WOULD LIKE TO HERE ANYBODY’S THOUGHTS ABOUT THIS PLS I’M SO NECK DEEP INSIDE L&DS LORE

[the-heart-of-a-monster]

HOPPING ON HERE AGAIN FOR ANOTHER SUPER LONG THEORY POST BOYSSSSS

Hello THOAM people! How are you all doing today? Good? Great? Did you just have one of the best days in your entire life and you are certain that nothing could possibly ruin it for you now??

WELL YOU ARE WRONG. /j I AM HERE TO RUIN IT ALL.

that is very much a joke I’m sorry I’m very high on adrenaline right now becAUSE THE NEW COVERS FOR ISSUE 9 JUST DROPPED AS I’M WRITING THIS OUT AND I AM SO EXCITED TO SEE WHAT HAPPENS NEXT AND I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS. So why don’t I just cut the dilly-dallying and get right on with it?

———

So, first thing I wanna mention is Sonic’s current state and his relationship status. (You may take that as out of context as you want lol) Sonic is currently in an internal state of panic mixed in with exhaustion. MAJOR exhaustion! Bro had to rush to Omega’s aid right after fighting Shadow in a cave full of ice. If that’s not draining as heck then I have no idea what isn’t. And on top of all that, he not only almost killed Omega, but he also knows now that his friends have known what was going on with him for a while! Probably ever since the scene where him, Tails, and Knuckles went out for breakfast and he passed out at the table. (I can’t remember which issue that was atm. I think issue 3…?) In short, Sonic is experiencing a whole rollercoaster of emotions right now, and he isn’t even awake yet! As soon as he wakes up I theorize he’s gonna be asking everyone a lot of questions, and will then ask for elaborations on top of all the answers he receives! I also don’t think he will be as trusting of others anymore, since his friends all knew of his biggest kept secret for a long while now and nobody said or did anything about it!

Now combine that with the guilt he must feel for Omega… The last thing Sonic witnessed before passing out was him going on a rampage and almost killing the robot. He must not feel great about that…! 🫢 And his relationship with Team Dark will be relatively strained as well. I mean, aside from Rouge probably. She loves Omega, but knows the context behind the situation and doesn’t blame Sonic much for what happened, so I think she won’t change much around the Blue Blur. Though his relationship with Shadow was already strained before all that, so… Yeah.

ALRIGHT TIME TO TALK ABOUT CHIP WOOHOOOOOOOO

We all know now that Chip has finally experienced what I’m calling, “✨God Puberty✨”

(Imagine there are pretty pink sparkles floating around the name. Kinda like the classic “You’re watching Disney Channel” thing)

This ✨God Puberty✨ has essentially opened Chip’s eyes, and changes the game completely! Now we not only have a god on our side but also a god who has context! I believe Chip will try and guide Dark Gaia back to its sleeping state to restore balance like they usually do, as explained in the comic, but the attempt will backfire seeing as Dark Gaia was awoken prematurely by Dr. Eggman. (More on him in a second) Chip will keep trying, because they’re a big floofy funny god that just wants food and just went through ✨God Puberty✨ so they’ll naturally wanna keep this going at a peaceful rate. Because despite all of his power, Chip is still Chip. Just a smol bitty guy who wants ice cream. With the addition of being a god. Sonic will then of course have to step in, leading to him getting his Gaia energy taken away and him being free of this curse, and then the events of the game finale play out as normal. Probably. It’s getting late now and I’m getting tired so my brain energy is wavering so idk exactly if that’s what will happen but it’s some food for thought I suppose.

NOW WE CAN FINALLY TALK ABOUT EGGMAN OH MY GOSH YES LET’S TALK ABOUT THE PATHETIC EGG-SHAPED SCIENTIST THAT WE CALL A MAN MADE OUT OF EGGS

To keep this short and simple, I’ll discuss Eggman within the context we have based solely on the new covers alone. Meaning the only speculation I’ll be doing is based off of those and the last few times we’ve seen the guy in the comic. Which actually was… A long time ago, actually. If I’m remembering correctly, that is. I could be wrong. ANYWHIZZLE LEMME STOP JABBERING AND LET’S GET ON WITH THE THEORIZING-

So the first cover shows a new, most likely final form of Sonic’s, encasing Eggman in a cracked eggshell while using his claws. Or more specifically, there is Eggman, acting as an egg yolk, sitting in a puddle of egg whites with the shell on each side of him, while Sonic’s Gaia claws slowly close in on him in the back. Sonic is staring at him menacingly, his anger and frustration reaching a boiling point due to all the stress he’s most likely experiencing combined with the Dark Gaia energy within him. This cover makes me assume that this issue is gonna act as the final battle against Eggman, a final “Screw you!” To the fat man in red. Obviously, Eggy ain’t going down without a fight, as shown in the next cover, but we’ll get to that in a minute.

The first cover suggests that Eggman is gonna be the main role of the issue, and that he’s gonna get his ass kicked. Sonic is gonna confront him, fully transform into his final Werehog form due to anger and stress, and we’ll then move onto the next issue probably. Again, I’m getting tired so this theory is getting pretty sloppy.

Now onto cover numero dos! I love this cover honestly, and it’s literally only because Knuckles and Tails are seen defending a transforming Sonic from Eggman. They are literally using themselves as like. A meat shield. Normally I’d be like “Oh no what happened????” But right now all I can think is “Omg ✨Brothers✨ 🤩”

———

AGAIN IM GETTING VERY TIRED NOW SO I WILL UNFORTUNATELY END THIS HERE AND WILL NOW GO BRUSH MY TEETH BUT HOPEFULLY I WILL REMEMBER TO COME BACK AND ELABORATE TOMORROW IF I HAVE THE TIME. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING, IT MEANS A TON THAT YOU TOOK THE TIME OUT OF THE DAY TO DO THAT.

oki ima go sleeb now thank you bai

The art for the covers was great btw I just wanted to let you know it’s absolutely wonderful I could look at it all day

you're gonna love what's gonna happent his issue, i can tell!!!!!!

only um. i think you were wayyy too tired so you confused sonic with metal sonic. either that ur ur just very polite to metals insistance that he is the real sonic.

[iamstartraveller776]

Feel free to ignore, but you mentioned that the fandom landscape has changed drastically from twenty years ago, and I’m curious what that means for you. I’ve seen lots of posts on the topic, but am interested in your experience if you want to share.

I absolutely can share!

Twenty years ago, I found fandom through bulletin boards or message boards (depending on what you called them). Trekbbs was my first one, and it's still standing. High speed internet was relatively new, and it was easy to keep up with "threads." Whenever you logged in, it would take you to where you left off with any given thread so you could catch up. (Discord does this...kinda, but Discord moves at warp speed where BBS's moved at impulse power.) It was easier to stay connected, to get to know people. Also, the boards were (and are) heavily moderated. Trolls were banned, and folks who got too heated under the collar were usually temporarily banned until tempers cooled. So it was generally a safe environment.

Oh, and I forgot to mention that the vast majority of the boards were grown-up only. That's not to say that minors didn't sneak through, but they were on their best behavior lest they get found out and kicked off the board.

And from the boards, we learned where to find fanfic. Back then, even though FFN existed, fic was primarily archived on private sites. There were no such thing as likes and kudos back then. It was fandom etiquette (at least for my corner of the Trek fandom) to leave a comment/review if you read a fic (and be nice about it!). It was the era of Kink Tomato (your kink is not my kink and that's okay) and don't like don't read and simply fun. We had challenges, did round robins—where someone would write a chapter of a fic, then another author would write the next, and so forth.

Even when I made the switch to posting more on FFN, it was pretty normal to send a message to someone to thank them for favorite-ing your story even if they didn't comment. And often they would message back, telling you what they enjoyed. I have some friendships born from this! It was normal. Writers weren't called "needy" and "self-absorbed" for hoping for more interaction with their readers. We were all in this together.

I also did yahoo groups for a time, and had a fantastic time with my friends in an email chain.

LiveJournal was kind of the peak of fandom, IMO. I think it was the first "public" website, rather than something privately owned, where we could build communities (private or public) as well as have our own pages (private or public). Some of the best fandom events happened on that site. But LiveJournal ended up imploding. (Cyber attacks then the new owners started wiping out entire communities without warning for violating the new terms of service. It was horrible.)

So we all moved to Tumblr. (And we were slowly moving to AO3. Some also moved to the site formerly called Twitter.)

Tumblr was pretty awesome back then. Because fandom people took the same community with them when they came. We didn't have replies back then, but dagnabit we screenshot tags or reblogged comments and posted them with replies. It was easier to follow tags and even some fandoms created blogs that were archives for fics. (Myself included.) The downside was, and continues to be, lack of moderation. Not that I think fandom should be gatekept, but it isn't as easy-going when you do have to worry about putting up with trolls as a rule rather than the exception.

Alas, life happened and I had to step away for a few years. When I came back...it's so much quieter. Significantly less interaction. Less comments on fics. There's just...less connection in general. People tend to flit in and out of fandom more often. And on top of that, there is the odd movement that fanworks shouldn't contain anything that would make a reader/viewer uncomfortable or is unrelatable to the general masses. As a fanworks creator, there have been times I felt more like a monkey dancing for a demanding audience rather than a squee-ing fan sharing things with fellow sqee-ing fans. I seriously questioned for a long time whether I would bother anymore.

(This also doesn't mention how streaming and binge-watching series rather than weekly releases have affected fandom. It's different when you get one episode a week for an entire season of 20-24 episodes than when a streamer releases the entire 8-10 episode series at once.)

A part of this is me, too. I don't have nearly as much time to invest in fandom as I used to. I can't be too critical of the changes in fandom, but it is different.

And so I hang onto a few of the friends I've found (like you!) and continue to find here and there. I write whatever I want and delete rude comments. I always reply to the others. And I keep plugging on!

Thank you for asking! And thank you for being part of what I love about being on Tumblr even after all these changes! (Sorry I got a bit verbose!)

[teacuptoast]

Hollow Spectators

Relation: Young Justice x platonic! gn! reader

Warnings: Kinda angsty Idk how to describe this, character injury(ok yeah it's angsty), language

Words: 1.0k

Summary: "Everyone wishes they had superpowers but I’d give anything for them to leave me alone.”

A part 2 loosely based off of Dead or Alive or Neither

A/N: I DID IT!!!! I POSTED!!!!! Anyway, I'm really happy about how this turned out! I've even got an idea for a part 3 if anyone is interested. I hope you all enjoy and please consider leaving me some feedback once you're done with the story!

Navigation:

The worst part was that they would follow him around like lost puppies. Always by his side or a short distance away, like they were afraid they would lose him. Tragically, they were already lost.

The Graysons were a rowdy bunch. It made sense that they’d been a part of the circus, always trying to brush hands with death. Unfortunately I never got to see the family business, though Dicks showed me a few photos here and there. The smile that would paint his face when he talked about his childhood only got brighter as he got older.

He still missed them; can’t imagine he wouldn’t. Though despite his youthful tragedy, he’d grown into quite the gentleman. I wanted him to keep growing. That’s why I couldn’t let them talk to him.

“Please, please, let us talk to our son,” She weeped, drifting closer to my seat at the counter. 

It was just Dick and I in the watchtower. Being on watch duty was never a particularly exciting event, but he made it bearable. He’d mostly spend his time cooking or looking through files while I tried to ignore his overbearing parents.

Despite what they think we’ve never been anything more than friends, I’d even go as far to him my brother. He needed an older sibling and I gladly took up the position. We’ve spent a majority of our teen years together, celebrating together, and grieving together. I’d even stayed in the manor a few times. He was the little sunshine I needed in my rather gloomy life.

“You're selfish and shallow. Let us talk to our son,” as Dick passed me a glass of water I thanked him softly, not bothering to look at the hollow spectators. Nodding back he leaned against the counter and we slipped into our usual conversation.

Talking about everything from the weather to his new job with Will. I didn’t even flinch at the hateful comment thrown towards me. It wasn’t anything I hadn’t heard before. I soon started to talk about myself and my pursuit of my master's degree. Through the conversation I watched Dick start to bite the inside of his cheek.

That that was a nervous tick of his, one that only happened when he was about to drop a bomb on me.

“You're a monster. You don’t deserve to have the meta gene. You're no hero.`

My concentration on our conversation quickly broke. I knew they were trying to piss me off, and they sure were doing a good job at it. Trying to casually glance at them my eyes hardened. They were standing where Dick was, next to the open cabinet of glassware. “You don’t deserve this, you don’t deserve to know our son-”

“I’m going to propose to Barba.”

Almost as if I forgot there where there I turned back too look at him.My face widening to a grin, as he nodding back excitedly like a little kid. He was going to marry the love of his life. He was going to be so happy-

Before I could finish my thought, I felt a dense pain consume the side of my face. Following the impact on my head, the shards broke into smaller pieces, respectively knocking me off the stool. Hitting the floor I was too shocked to brace myself for impact, meeting the glass shards that had fallen down just seconds before. A large ground left my mouth.

As soon as my eyes carefully reopened I looked towards the culprit, “You pasty son of a bitch.” I didn’t get another chance to look at them before Dick covered my view. He cradled my neck in his hands and spoke words that I could bother hearing. I was more concerned with the looming desire to sleep, or how the hell his mom was able to throw a vase at me.

***

“We swept the entire building. Every camera, every sensor, even every air vent. We would have seen them if they had come into the Watchtower.”

Groaning awake I found myself surrounded by familiar heroes dressed in black. Dick, or well now, Nightwing, sat on the chair beside me while Batman stood at the foot of my bed. Next to him were Robin and Spoiler as Barbra entered through the door. They continued to theorize about my attacker for the next few minutes while I patiently listened.

After hearing the most obscure of theories I decided to sit up in bed. It was anything but comfortable; I just wanted to look at least a little presentable. Placing a hand on my wrapped forehead I looked to the man himself.

“Did you know who it was who attacked you?” He asked me. 

‘Yes. Yes I did. It was Dicks parents who refused to move on while they had the chance and have now grown bitter. Apparently bitter enough to throw a vase at my head. I have no clue how they did that by the way. Did I mention she is snickering behind you Bruce? She is enjoying the hell out of this. Wait sorry, you don’t know yet do you, I CAN SEE DEAD PEOPLE! AND I'M LOSING MY MIND OVER HERE BECAUSE I CAN’T GO ANYWHERE WITHOUT HAVING SOME NOSEY, SELFISH, ANNOYING SON OF A BITCH FOLLOWING ME AROUND-’

“Did you?”

“Batman, can I have a word with you? Alone?”

Their family turned from me to Batman, curiously awaiting his answer. It didn’t take long though before he started pushing them out the medbay door. I let my gaze drop into my lap, not knowing if I was ready to tell him or not, though he beat me to the chase.

“Your meta genes have activated. Haven’t they?” His eyes were cold as he questioned me. To him I was now an unpredictable variable and Bruce doesn't like things he can’t control.

“They’ve always been activated,” I started, “Though they’ve never been useful. Everyone wishes they had superpowers but I’d give anything for them to leave me alone.”

“Who’s them?”

“They’re everywhere. A few of them are in the watchtower as we speak. Though the worst ones always follow my friends around. They’re dead and angry and won’t leave me alone…I just want them to leave me alone.”

A/N: How was the story? Got some feedback? Let me know in the comments. Thanks for reading and I'll see you soon!

[wolfnanaki]

2023 Retrospective

It’s hard to describe what happened this year. So much of it doesn’t seem real, and if it weren’t for me living through it and writing it down, I’d have assumed I dreamed it. Sometimes, you don’t realize the full scope of “life comes at you fast” until you’re living through it. And I don’t want to discuss major world events because fuck, there’s no way I could say anything meaningful about them.

If I were to give the short version, I’d call this a “silver lining” year for me. Lots of bad things happened, but good things came out of some of them, or at the very least, I had reason to keep going. I lost my job, my dog died, I got doxed, just to name a few. But I’ve also been using the time off work to improve my physical and mental health. I’ve made several new friends, some surprising friendships that I didn’t see coming. I’ve been privately chugging away at some writing projects that I can’t wait to show you all soon, once it’s time.

And if you were to tell me three years ago after the PS5 reveal stream that my entire online presence in 2023 would be swallowed up by Goodbye Volcano High, I’d find that hard to believe. But that’s kinda what happened. It’s a beautiful game that stole my heart and gave me new inspiration for stories and analysis. To all of the KO_OP staff, I'm so glad you didn't buckle against all the adversity you faced and gave us this heartfelt, unique, memorable game. I wish you all nothing but further success and accolades on your future projects, I can't wait to see what you've got coming up.

I want this new year to be one of positive change and growth. I’ve been applying to so many jobs and rebuilding my resume, and I’ve had some interviews lately that I hope to lead somewhere good. Plus there are aforementioned writing projects I’m hoping to share soon! And this April will mark my third year of being on HRT, which is kinda wild to think about. Being openly trans online can be scary, but I'm proud to be who I am.

I shouldn’t drag this on for longer than it needs to be, so I think I’ll call it here.

Thank you so much to all of my amazing friends, old and new, for making this year memorable, for keeping me going when shit got rough, for everything, really. I hope all of you reading this have an amazing new year filled with love, accomplishment, and good health.

Love, Nanaki

[creation-help]

Hello! How are you doing? Hope you’re doing well! I’m not entirely sure if you have gotten the same ask before but: I need help on writing character development. I’m not sure where to start and how to start. It’s something that’s been bugging me for a bit as I write lol.

Thank you so much! =]

What a wonderfully polite ask! Haven't had this asked from me yet so it'll be interesting. I had to think for a bit but this is how I'd go about doing it :]

Firstly: Figure out your character. What kinda character is it, and what's their personality? What part do they play in the story? To make a vague example, if your character is extremely self confident and oblivious to their flaws, to the point that it actively sabotages their life, an interesting character development would be to shake up, or shatter that image. See how it would impact the character. What would make this happen? What would need to happen for them to start questioning their capability in themself? And what kind of experience would get them to realize that, no, they're not as infallible as they think? Again, each character to their own but I used that example for the possible thought processes you could go through. The point is to just figure, and map out, where this character would be interesting to take, and what are your options, realistically. For this part it's important to consider the themes of your story, aka, ideas and concepts that show up often in the story, and/or something you want to tell with your story. Like, what's your story about but not literally. This can greatly help in deciding, for example, whether you should develop a villain for redemption, or towards defeat.

Remember, character development doesn't always need to be about said character becoming a better person! Character development just means that the character undergoes a gradual change through the events of the story, and by the end, you can compare the two versions and see how they're the same person who's just been changed by their experiences. Personally I think it's really important to keep the core soul of your character the same, so it's not them basically just transforming into another person. It's about the interest of putting a character in a situation, that would be so major that it makes them reconsider things or have feelings about something so much that they change. And most importantly, how this particular character would react to the situation in their own way! Whether they themself caused the situation that incites this change, or if it's caused by another character, is also something to consider! If the character themself causes their own character developing incidents, it'll be good to get some self reflection from said character. If it's caused by another character, this can help in exploring their opinion perhaps changing about this other character. Or being questioned.

Another big tip I'd have is to remember the pace and subtlety. Obviously there can be one major event that causes a character to undergo change, but it can also be multiple different occurrences that each have an impact on the character over time. Try not to make the change too sudden (unless your point is to show how dramatically this Thing changed your character. Still, I recommend approaching it with a certain layer of finesse). Obviously pacing is important in any aspect of a story, so remember to space out the character development appropriately to what you want to show. Give them some time. Change can take time, and that's okay.

To recap so far: You need to know your character well, so you can know 1. Where you want to take them, and 2. What would cause them to start developing into one direction or the other. Got it? Good! Now..

How??? - Obviously this varies depending on alot, but. Start with having a certain amount of time establishing who your character already is, before their development. If you want to portray them growing (or corrupting) over the course of the story, it's important to know where we started. Helps to really feel the change and difference ykno? Once you feel that your character has been established, and the real adventure starts to pick up (whatever that may mean for your story/character), you can start to chip away at them. Here's some generic examples of how your character might start changing:

They see/experience something that contradicts with something they never thought to question, or they are angered by something so much that it inspires them to do something, or they are traumatized and shocked by something, or they set out to do something but it doesn't go quite as expected, or they meet someone new who really gives them something to think about, or they learn something new about an already familiar person that gives them something to think about, or they find some interesting place or item, or they have relationship conflicts, or something strange happens that starts changing them (physically) so their self perception is challenged. And so on.

Once you've started with what first shakes the foundations of your character, give it a bit of time to simmer. It can be a long time if your character is stubborn and slow to change, or it can be short if the opposite is true. Explore the possible thoughts and feelings, and conflicts this change may cause in your character. You might have intense denial, or confusion. You might have missteps where the character thinks "What am I even doing?". You can have relapses, a sort of "No no, this is how things have always been, it doesn't change anything!" thingy. You can have revelations and realizations. Learning. Trying and failing. Lots of thoughtfulness. Doubt. Baby steps or attempts at doing something differently. Rewarding experiences for doing something differently. Punishing experiences for doing something differently.

Remember to keep feeding new experiences to your character at a consistent pace to help fuel their development. This may be because the character itself now seeks more of whatever might be causing their development, or because they're just thrown into it. For example if a character is spiraling into a corruption where they just get progressively worse, you need to have events that justify this for the character. If you think a certain experience would have the character react in a way that doesn't make sense for the development you're going for, change the approach. I know it can be hard to figure out more specifically for your particular character but I hope any of this helps to start thinking about it.

It's kinda like mixing paint. You start with one color and think what color you need to add, to make it a different colour. It heavily depends on what color you start out with, and you need to know what color you want to end up with. Then just, add accordingly.

Remember to use other characters for help! They can assist in reflection, talking about things, having their change affirmed or denied and how that impacts the characters, and so on. Other characters, props, places, supernatural aspects occurrences, conflicts, relationships..

Additionally, on the How? part. If you want the development to be gradual and nuanced, take your time with it and little by little, show your character taking different actions, or thinking something new, or whatever else to signify their change. Little by little. Maybe for now, they'll try something new but the next time they feel safer leaning on their old self. Perhaps they try too many new things at once, get overwhelmed (or worse) and retreat to reconsider. Maybe this changes what kind of character they end up developing into, if they had different ideas about that. Any number of ways can do, just remember to have something to show for how your character might be changing. Use it to make the story more interesting!

If it's a sudden, dramatic change, still, remember finesse. Mostly I mean try not to get corny or cliche with it, even sudden changes have their own connotations and consequences. For example, show how your character feels about this sudden thing, and just as if not more importantly, how other characters feel about it. How does this change their perception? Does it cause relationship conflict? Dive into it. How does it psychologically affect your character to change so suddenly like this? Does it cause missteps, doubt, or maybe inspire newfound confidence and strength? Remember to have them also think about their previous state of being, if the development is sudden. Have them reflect why and how they ended up here. Compare. You can use the suddenness of the change for some shock, or angst, or to really drive a point home about something. You can use it for positive things too, depending on what the development is and what environment fostered it. Just remember to show how this change happened, what it causes, and how the character could compare now.

Final recap: 1. Who are you developing into what? 2. What causes this development? 3. Show how the development happens 4. Show effects of development

I also hope you're doing well! You're welcome :]

[washipink]

Rain by Jocelyn Samara D Year 1: 2010-2011

erSo I recently found out that 1 year ago, a comic that was INCREDIBLY important to me as a trans middle schooler who went to catholic school had wrapped up. This year, I’ve decided I’m going to read through and review Rain by Jocelyn Samara, 1 year of the comic’s run at a time. First up: Year 1, which covers Chapter 1 (The New Girl) through Chapter 6 (Fallen Angel). I’ll be summarizing the story and characters for those unfamiliar, so feel free to follow along.

There’s a LONG-ASS post under that read more. If you have any experience with the comic or enjoy the post, please talk about it with me. It’ll be a good time.

Year 1 Summary

The star of the show is Rain, a transgender 17 year old girl who moved in with her Aunt Fara after her mother’s death. It starts on the first day of her senior year of high school, the first time she’s ever tried to pass as female in front of... anyone???

Based on some of the language used in the character bios, I should be very clear that this comic is from 2010 and written by a trans woman who is most likely older than most of my followers. There may be language used that you personally don’t agree with. I’m not a fan of being called transsexual myself, but there’s nothing wrong with saying it.

Anyway, the basic gist is that Rain passes EXCELLENTLY and attracts a lot of attention from her male classmates, much to her dismay.

But the men aren’t the only people with their eyes on Rain. Lesbian classmate, Maria and her fake boyfriend, Gavin make a bet of 5 United States Dollars out of who can talk to Rain first.

Here’s the rub: During Role, Gavin seems to recognize Rain’s last name. It’s the same as his childhood best friend, Ryan. Gavin and Maria then banter a little bit, jokingly saying “what if that IS Ryan? could ya believe that?”

Little do they know...

One thing about Rain is that its cast of characters is by no means infallible. Even characters that I came to love, like Maria, are kind of insensitive. Just about no one in this cast has ever MET a trans person in their lives prior to Rain. It’s very true to life in that way. You meet a lot of people that are ignorant or accidentally insensitive. And sometimes, they learn to stick up for you.

The realistic portrayal of how trans teens can be treated by other teens is one of my FAVORITE things about Rain.

Anyway, Gavin brings up Ryan Falherty to Rain, which causes her to panic and run away.

And Crash Directly into the fifth member of our main cast, RUDY!!!!

A rather gossipy gay boy that sees up Rain’s skirt and thinks she’s just a REALLY brave gay dude. He tells Gavin and Maria pretty much right away and Gavin does not take it well. The majority of Year 1 is spent on Gavin and Rain repairing their strained friendship after years apart from one another. That begins here, with Gavin confronting Rain about her identity.

Gavin’s super upset about the whole deal, but Maria and Rudy are some of Rain’s biggest shooters going forward. Even if they can ask a LOT of invasive questions.

If I’m being completely honest, there’s no MAJOR developments in Chapter 2. Fara gets a call from Rain’s older Sister about how their older Brother hasn’t talked to either of them in forever. This lays a few seeds for later events, but it is PRETTY unimportant for a while. There’s some really good emotional dialogue in it though.

In Chapter 3, Rudy’s meddling directly causes Rain and Gavin to reconcile. They have a discussion about how the reason she never told him was just that she was scared to lose her only friend.

MEANWHILE, in an attempt to make some actual friends, Fara reaches out to her neighbors and meets Ky(lie) and Heather Coven, a Gender Ambiguous Teen who goes to a different high school and her less approving older sister.

Kylie, also known as Ky, swaps gender presentations incredibly frequently, not really showing any bias for one or the other. So do not expect me to be consistent with their pronouns. Their gender is kinda messy. Almost like he’s some kind of... real person with a real life gender. Crazy.

Anyway, Fara invites them over and she and Heather get drunk, which means she can’t pick up Rain from the mall. Rain needs a place to sleep that night and Gavin invites her to stay with him.

This begins Chapter 4, in which Gavin and Rain realize that things may be different from when they were kids... but there’s a lot that hasn’t changed. Gavin remarks about how much more feminine Rain is than when she was a kid and how that’s WEIRD for him... but they end up playing a game from their childhood pretty much all night. It reminds them of all the good times and ignites within them the hope that they can have MORE good times going forward.

As an adult with friends I’ve had on-and-off relationships to, this speaks to me way more powerfully than ever before. The more things change, the more they stay the same.

The next day, during her hangover, Fara sees Rain’s older brother on an ad for a dating website with his new fiance.

And on the way back to her apartment, Rain meets Ky for the first time. Neither one of them is aware that the other one has ANY kind of Gender going on and they won’t be for quite some time.

The chapter ends with Aunt Fara telling Rain about what happened with Aiken.

Chapter 5 is a simple one, Popular prep girl, Emily is giving out invitations to a Halloween party for her “perfect senior year”

Everyone but Rudy gets one, which causes Maria to give Emily a talking to. She assures Maria that he wasn’t intentionally excluded and it definitely wasn’t because he’s the only openly gay student in the whole school.

Oh, also a dude beats Rudy up for that exact reason, earning Maria’s fury later on. Rain invites Ky to come with the rest of them to the party.

Like I said, pretty simple chapter.

The last chapter of year 1 is Chapter 6: Fallen Angel.

Everyone is showing off their Halloween costumes before they leave for the party. Rudy’s reads as a bit insensitive to rain, as he goes as.... a high school girl.

We’ve all heard this one, right? young queer person that wants to toy with their gender expression uses a Halloween costume as an excuse? It can hit different watching your friend do this when you’re a stealth trans person and especially when you’re one as self-conscious as Rain.

When they reach the address for the party, they find out that Emily... has an older Boyfriend. Like, a WAY older boyfriend. Who lets all these literal teenaged children drink at a party in HIS HOUSE.

also he’s dressed as the devil in case you needed any more signals he was BAD NEWS.

This sounds like a good time for an aside: Fara is on a date with someone she met online. He works at a manga translator and offers to get Rain a meeting with her favorite mangaka.

Meanwhile, at the party, Chase seems to recognize Rain from somewhere. What could this mean?

Anyway, remember how I mentioned the underage drinking? Yeah, Rudy is HELLA drunk. And the results are not pretty.

The whole school sees this and is... BAFFLED. Because of course, Rudy is gay. how could he kiss a girl? Did he do it because he was dressed as a girl? Was it the alcohol? was RAIN Gay? Who knows?

The chapter ends on Rain riding home in tears.

Thus ends the first year of Rain.

Art

Ok, let’s talk about the elephant in the room. This art is... not too impressive. Every character looks like they jumped out of a How to Draw Manga book and Rain’s design is VERY 2010. Backgrounds are infrequent and many panels feature just 2 characters next to each other against a flat color.

But I think that’s okay. While the visual design of Rain is not immaculate, it’s certainly passable. Samara had a story to tell and she didn’t let her art hold her back. She just took pen to paper and let it go. As the comic goes along, you can tell she’s trying different things and experimenting with drawing a variety of poses. That said, the art style never really changes at all during the comic’s run.

Pure Unfiltered Story Opinions

Rain was one of the first real queer stories I’d gotten a chance to read. At the ripe, young age of 12, every word of it was unreal to me. A girl like me made REAL friends in spite of it all and got to be who she was. And now, reading it again, it really holds up.

Rain has a depiction of queer friendships that’s very true to a lot of peoples’ lived experience. Not everyone GETS each other, but they try. Sometimes, they ask a stupid-ass question. Sometimes, you get into fights. 

Also, sometimes people in your high school get prayed upon by creepy weirdos in their late 20s who think they can get easy tail from CHILDREN. (Trust, people. This gets addressed. This is NOT a fucking glorification and if anyone in the notes says it is, they’re blocked.)

I look forward to seeing where the comic goes from here and I hope you’re ready to take that journey with me.

[unitchiefs-blackbirdphoenix]

unpopular opinion: haley was too good for hotch

strongly agree | agree | neutral | disagree | strongly disagree

Ooh alrighty! Damn, this might be a hot take that I agree with. I’m not super invested in Hotch’s character, but I will say this as observation and my response. I think there was at one point where they were in love with each other (they were high school sweethearts, I think?), and I believe they do love each other even beyond Haley’s death and their divorce.

The problem is how things change with Hotch’s work schedule, which became much busier for him.

Here are some things to consider. Because she was busy taking care of their son, she doesn’t have a lot of “me time”, and doesn’t have much time with her husband whenever he is home. Haley’s role is a lot like Will’s, except the major difference (other than gender) is that Will understands what JJ does as a law enforcement officer himself. However, Haley and Will both ask their partners to spend more time with them and their families. We have seen both frustrated with their partners’ schedules. Another major difference is the amount of effort Hotch and JJ put into their home life. While I do understand the objectivity that Hotch puts on at work to keep himself emotionally distant (which is important to have) and his love for Jack, just around seasons 2-3 when he’s at home, his main focus is the job and eventually chooses it over his family. He forgets about Jack’s birthday (or another event, I think?) and distances himself from Haley, who is asking for her husband and father of her son back.

He starts putting more responsibility on himself when they divorce and Haley dies, and he has to look after Jack. In later seasons, you could see how Hotch learns more about Jack’s interests and tries to be there for him, but my issue is that before, he relied on Haley constantly in the past because she was the only one at home, and she wants to have a little time away from everything. When he’s home, he wishes that there was something at work that needs him there, even when his marriage and family are falling apart.

Idk, something about Hotch early seasons (specifically in s2-5) is probably I’m not too fond of. Later on, he’s alright and started growing on me a little. I think when he and Haley had Jack, he was more in love with the concept of having a family to go home to every time he came home, and took that for granted whether he knew it or not. I think he put his job a lot of the time in front of his family’s needs, knowing that he’s pushing them aside. I think it also affected the way he saw the other member’s personal lives with their own family. He had to learn the hard way from his own mistakes and doesn’t want the rest of the team to go through the same thing. I just kinda dislike how much of an absentee parent and husband he became in the first few seasons.

[thedemigodoracle]

Please read:

Ok, so as I jokingly said before “I’m back.” - I’m not joking, I am back.

Not entirely yet but here are some things to wait for in the near future.

Before I list it I need to browse fast through the real life stuff first so bear with:

- one of the reasons I did go missing from art and fandoms in general wasn’t just the ammount of books but also family situations, depression, relationships and in the last few years I lost grandma, grandpa and even my mother to a disease they don’t have it diagnosed yet because it was so rare.

Obvsly took a major hit to my mental health and the ability to write and just have energy kinda left me. I’m handling it I’m in therapy. This is all we need to talk about it.

- it’s been over ten years since some of your fave fics have been updated and while both Clichesbullet on ff.net and thatu on DA will be there and won’t be deleted HERE are what’s to expect:

1. My endgame here is reading the books back and forth again, as well as other source

Material for other fandoms I will

Be publishing for.

-updating the old fan mixes and uploading it to Spotify so it’s more accessible and going back (when possible to art).

- I will use AO3 some new aesthetics and user name (though probably just thatu) and edit a lot more to fit what I believe is better not because the world changed in general but because so

Did I.

Some of the racism and homophobia will still be there are these are the characters having flaws whose arcs weren’t complete but lots of it will also be changed because I’m 34 now I also the world is changed and some stuff just wouldn’t fly and I kinda hate it (but the old material is still there available on the old

Accounts).

- I’m not sure technology will be adapted but some references will here and there and I can clearly deliver something better now that I’ve taught English for over half of my life and am taking a masters degree on translation studies.

- real life will get me too busy sometimes so please I hope you’re excited but I know lots

Of you also have jobs or even families. So leave reviews and keep

Me company but also understand I was bad at updating before even with better time

Management this is will be a ride.

- I’m doing this to prove myself I can do and make good things.

- This site as well as the thatu blog will be updated.

- if you were a follower and have deleted your tumblr or changed usernames please leave a reply with who we were because I’ve had an eventful few years. I remember most of you, but I may need a nudge.

- both my writing and art style have developed and so did my world views - stuff will look different but hopefully still bring you comfort. And laughter.

And tears…?

- there will be some one shots posted focusing on stuff like grown up characters and new knowledge

We now have though the characterization will still follow the book ones as that’s how I kinda got used to it.

- I’m back but I’ll be getting back slowly and posting updates here. Tell ur friends who haven’t been here in a while but used to be part of our group of

Weirdos.

- I missed being a fandom person and hopefully now I can find solace in you guys back again.

- some new fandoms will pop up, as will

Some

Ships (see what I did there? Find solace? Will some ships? Hehe).

-Some extra texts will be added to whatever adaptations I make especially regarding transphobia and HP though I do intend to finish my Hannah/Neville story.

- maybe I’ll write original

Stuff too who knows?

Also, I missed you, spread the word. There’s a brand new old me in town. New ships, new views, new one shots, edits, a very different music taste (actually no I just added more stuff) and a lot of improved knowledge of vocabs and world geography.

Please spread this to whoever you think might be interested. It’s not popularity or anything, I’m trying to get back some pieces of me I lost along the way and writing and drawing used to be FUN and help me make FRIENDS.

I’ll keep u posted once everything is at least remotely ready to go.

And omg you’ll finally know what Silena had on clarisse.

Oh and I’m still not for writing smut but there will be more Adult/Mature like material as some ships require it and I am older. No minors having descriptive s*x

Of course but u know it’d feel weird to talk about these huge ass long relationships and not bring it up naturally.

Anyway, reply to this with whatever. Leave a like or something too but mostly leave a reply so we can start this journey together -

New younger fans are also welcome I’ll make my best to keep this space as safe as possible!! I teach kids and teens and I’d kill for u to have a place to be you safely.

Also there will now be additions on author notes for whether a ship is canon or fanon what I adapted and new fandoms new ships and trigger warnings before sensitive chapters that deal with stuff that before I wouldn’t.

Love, I’ve missed this,

thatu.

[idololivine]

this event (and his latest ssr rooms) really establishes olivine’s route to self-acceptance and the importance of having someone who will be there to also accept him. thankfully, it’s not the edgelord corruption arc that some people are pushing. this one just resonates with me more 😭

the thing is, some people are trying hard to be good but will sometimes fall short because of reasons. when people are expecting you to always be good, you will sometimes feel the desire to break out of those expectations because you just want to exist as you are—, flaws and all. but that doesn’t mean that you stopped “being good” per se. it’s just that you want to stop catering to their perceived notions of you that you feel like you have to fulfill.

i’m sorry, i am rambling but this event hits too close to home 😭 kinda cringe but i really am an olivine kinnie. his character just validates my faith and my desires and everything i’ve been through so far in life (minus becoming a priest lol)

Yeah!! I mean, I get that a corruption arc would appeal to some people, but I also suspect that it would be appealing in the kink way. Not that I'm kinkshaming, but honestly, it's borderline insulting to me when people criticize his writing when what they really mean is that it doesn't appeal to their corruption kink. Sometimes, Actually Compelling Character Writing is more important than kink. But I digress.

I get that a lot of people like cruel and fucked up characters; there's a comfort to knowing that you can be really fucked up and still deserve kindness, and also there's a persistent fantasy among certain demographics of being able to fix your asshole boyfriend (or not having to fix your asshole boyfriend because he's inhuman.) But that just isn't me. I like it when traumatized characters choose kindness; I like the reassurance that just because I had a cruel upbringing it does not mean I have no choice but to be cruel myself. I love Olivine because at every opportunity, he chooses kindness, and I love that this event is digging into the times where he feels like he no longer has that choice. Even a worm will turn; what happens when you push a fundamentally kind person past their breaking point?

It's a character arc I personally find compelling, especially because the answer in the end isn't "he was actually evil all along" but rather "anyone would go nuts under that kind of pressure" and also "when everyone expects you to be perfect, even the slightest misstep will feel catastrophic - so why not go all the way and destroy everything?" He's not a bad person, just someone who was in a bad situation. So was I. So are many of us. Our worst days do not define us.

The sex isn't the only part of Olivine's struggles, but it is a major part. We see him go from sexually submissive in his first scenes (where he isn't fully responsible for wanting sex, because Eiden's ultimately the one in control) to sexually dominant in his most recent rooms (where he's finally allowing himself to embrace his hunger and take what he wants). It's such a distinctive angle on an arc about self-acceptance, and it's one that couldn't have been told in a fully SFW story. It's erotica as character exploration. I suspect in the future he'll maintain a good push-pull with Eiden where they can trade off who's dominant and who's submissive in scenes, where he's finally shaken off all his shackles and it's all about what feels good in the moment.

[mizumech]

Day 7: Blade/Ocean/Death

Hi! It’s mizumech. I know I’ve been late on Day 5 and 6, but Day 5 is spiralling out of control in length. Well, here’s Day 7, inspired by the Magnus Archives, coming in at 2451 words named ‘Gone Fission’.

(Subtext: I have never interacted with the original Magnus Archives)

All rights reserved.

TW: Death, Altered state of consciousness, Bloodlust

Enjoy!

-

[Click]

[MARTYN]

Statement of Ren “The Dog” Lycan, regarding an…incident of violence and potential altered state of consciousness during a LARP session. Recorded direct from subject today, 17th September, 2023—

[REN]

…do we need to be so formal, my dude?

[MARTYN]

It’s mainly for the sake of archival and whoever the next archivist is, my liege.

[REN]

…

[MARTYN]

You—you know what? Tell you what, I’m going to…re-record this. Or something. If that’s okay with you. God, I should not have taken that coffee from Grian this morning…

[REN]

Yeah, I’m okay with anything at this point—wait...Grian works here?

[MARTYN]

Yeah, surprising, right? I always thought he would be in architecture or something else that has to do with eyes.

[Click]

[Click]

[MARTYN]

Statement of Ren “The Dog” Lycan, regarding an incident of violence and potential altered state of consciousness during a LARP session. Recorded direct from the subject today, 17th September, 2023. Statement begins. 

[REN]

So, backstory first. Death’s been a big thing for me all my life. I love acting and storytelling, and Death is always a big theme. I die a lot, actually. 

[MARTYN]

…what? You never told me about this?

[REN]

Yeah, I’ll come back to that later. Anways, I first died when I was…uh…when was that? I think I was like…ten? I drowned on a beach trip, and everything was white. I think I might’ve even met Death herself! Death’s not as strange as it seems. It’s like drifting away with the sound of your family accompanying you. It’s also moist. She waved to me, and I waved back, but then I got pulled back to the living world where Ma and Pa Dog were lookin’ down worriedly at me. They later told me that they had done CPR and mouth-to-mouth on me and that had saved me life.

I don’t think that’s true. CPR in fact fails most of the time, did you know that?

Well, as a ten year old, I didn’t know that. 

I jumped off the roof of my house back then at night and I think I broke my neck or something,

Now, neck breakage doesn’t always kill you. I’ve actually heard that immediate medical attention regarding injuries like that can save lives.

Well, I didn’t have that. It was nighttime and I hadn’t told anyone that I was planning to jump.

I just kinda laid there for a while.

When I finally died, Death and I met again. She offered me a seat, and I think we chatted a bit. We might’ve talked about Transformers.

[MARTYN]

Sorry to interrupt, but you met Death and you talked about Transformers?

[REN]

Heck yeah! We talked about Optimus Prime and Bumblebee before I came back. This proved that I could die and come back, which my ten-year-old-self did not think to take advantage of.

I love kitter-me to death, heh, but he’s not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

Well, I got through life rather smoothly until my sixteenth birthday. I participated in a group-outing-friendly-championship with some friends; Falsie, H Mama, and Fruity were on my team. This time, the game was some sort of tag with darts and normal other rules.

So. You know by now. I somehow died. Something about the darts. I broke off from the group and got ambushed by Sapnap. I don’t even think anyone noticed. The recovery period this time was so short that I didn’t even get to wave to Death before I got pulled back. 

We won that game, for the record.

There weren’t really any major events like that other than a different tournament where I might have died. For that one, I’m not sure. It felt more like I had gotten on a train, fallen asleep, and missed my station.

That was a strange dream, I tell you. I dreamt Zed was with me, and there was a melancholy guy called Wilbur. There was also a guy called Schlatt.

[MARTYN]

The name Zedaph sounds familiar. Has he made a statement here before?

[REN]

I don’t know. He does seem like the sort of person to do that, though.

When I got off ‘the train’, people patted me on the back with nicknames like “Grimdog”, and “The Reaper”, which is kinda strange, if you ask me.

I know for a fact almost no one knows I can die.

Okay, maybe Falsie knows. She looked at me like she’d seen a ghost when I came back from that whole deal with Sapnap, and she’d already made quite a few death related jokes in front of me when we first became friends. That’s not even her normal humour!

Well, so do you.

[MARTYN]

...excuse me?

[REN]

I even died one of the first times we met.

Remember?

Grian organised a LARP thing with his friend groups, which included you and me. He called it a social experiment. Well, to him and Mumbo, everything is a social experiment, I guess.

Did I tell you about the time Mumbo put a button near our office pantry that dispensed chocolate coins? It had lights to indicate when it had last been pressed and the number of chocolate coins dispensed depended on how long we waited to press it. If no one pressed it for too long it would supposedly explode. He even found a way to make the timing pressed correspond with a different coloured sweet wrapper!

Hilarious, I tell you! Workplace drama for days!

Oop. I think I’m off topic at this point.

Anyhoozle, you and I were allied. All of this game was merely meant to be a game, if you don’t remember. I was the king of a fictional place called Dogwarts and we were against Grian and Scar’s faction. I lost my ‘green life’ to an explosive trap, and my ‘yellow life’ to you.

That was a real life.

Remember?

That axe I gave you, it was supposed to be foam. I knew it was foam. Grian wouldn’t have allowed the circulation of weapons made of anything other than foam.

You know what happens next, I get you to behead me, right?

Funny story: that was inspired by a thick epic that appeared in my mail one time. I think the inside was stamped “Library of Joe Hills”?

Well, I see the axe come down. Mumbo’s behind the camera, and he’s recording this.

And then the axe glints.

I see that axe glint in the moonlight, and deep down I know that’s not plastic, or foam. That’s metal and it’s coming for my head.

One moment, I’m sprawled out on Blackheart Altar, and one moment, I’m facing Death.

I think I even got some pickup lines in there.

(a laugh)

Does that make me a more successful Thanos? Ladies get in line! Ladies, gentlemen, anyone can get in the line!

[MARTYN]

Ren…

[REN]

When I came back, I was not the same. There was something in my head, and it was telling me to kill. It was urging me to snatch the axe to lop off your head, actually!

But I have to resist, right? No killing of the bros.

Besides, only I get the private landline to Death herself!

Back to the story.

I think there were voices in my head. All of a sudden, it felt like I was the character I had been illustrating. I wholly believed that we hated Grian and we hated Scar and we all hated each other. 

I don’t know why this death was so different.

I wholly believed that you were my Hand, and that Scar was nothing but—nothing but scum!

It’s a horrible thing, to think of your friends that way, and it’s so terrible to actually consider killing them.

I didn’t even know you well back then, but I would’ve trusted you with my life.

But in that moment, when I was staring at the pool of my own blood, those voices wanted more blood.

It wasn’t just a game anymore. I wanted them to die. Those voices were pushing against each other, overlapping and reaching at fantasies of revenge.

Kill. Kill. Kill.

When I was still vaguely sane I knew my plan was to gift you that axe. But when I knew that was a real weapon, my hindbrain could not take not having it for myself.

I needed their blood dripping down my hands. It was going to be me and Scar to the death, my Hand.

That axe…

I think the thing that should have really rattled me was when I ‘killed’ Joel.

We were chasing him and his ‘wolf army’ and we chased him into the woods. Now, normal me would not have had the stamina to do that. I would’ve been panting and on my knees at that point if I was normal, pre-death Ren. 

But I wasn’t. This wasn’t a roleplay anymore to me. 

I was the Red King, protector of my country; and my vision was tinging with red. Literally. I had a doctor check it out a week later. Nothing.

It was an animalistic sort of desire. At the speed I was going, I wasn’t even feeling tired. I knew I could freakin’ eat him whole if I wanted to, but I was just nipping at his heels and taking big swings at him with a foam blade.

Thank God I wasn’t holding the real axe. I don’t think you realised the danger of that axe at the time, to be honest.

I would’ve killed him. I would’ve.

Eventually, I caught up. In Joel’s eyes was some sort of fake bravado. 

I don’t even know how I could tell. Normal me would not have been able to do that.

I think the Red King could smell the fear rolling off Joel, because I was suddenly in his space; punching him and snarling like one of his wolves.

I didn’t stop. I wanted to tear him to pieces. I wanted him dead. I needed him dead. I didn’t stop until Mumbo started frantically gesturing at me to stop and you were pulling me away.

In that moment, I had never felt more…alive.

It’s a strange euphoria. It’s strange to feel so good to beat someone up.

Now that I look back on it, that’s a terrifying sensation; the electric tingle I had after I did what I did. 

Joel was just lying there; trembling. 

He looked so…small to me. 

I think he might’ve been hyperventilating.

We never spoke much after that, in any of the later LARP sessions. 

I still couldn’t get the idea that this was a game to stick to my brain. It was all so real to me.

Even after I lost my ‘red life’—my last one, I couldn’t get the bloodlust out of my brain.

I watched you die in vain; trying to protect Dogwarts, and it took me all my self control not to stand right back up and stab Scar.

I watched your axe fall.

It had turned back to foam.

When I got back to the car, I realised I couldn’t remember how to drive. I had to get you to drive me home.

I couldn’t figure out how any of my technology worked, in fact.

It was only halfway home when my ears kinda popped.

My heart was racing because I didn’t know you.

All the voices seemed to shut up all at once.

I didn’t know who you were.

I knew how to drive. I knew how to use a comm. I knew that I had been invited to LARP.

But I didn’t know you.

You were talking about how believable my improv was and I was just sitting there in the passenger seat with adrenline coursing through me like a drug. 

Something had shifted.

At that moment, I don’t think I recognised you. I don’t think you recognised me either. 

Just a moment before that, we had been as thick as thieves. Then, it felt like I was looking at you through a periscope across the ocean. 

Your eyes…they were blue. I don’t know why that shocked me. Blue is one of the colours I see best. But it did. I could’ve sworn they were a more purplish-grey.

It was weird.

I eventually got to know you normally, and we have a great friendship now.

Well, I don’t think I’ve died since.

I don’t think I’ve tried to kill anyone since.

(a laugh)

Or at least I don’t think so.

End of statement?

[MARTYN]

Thanks for coming in, man. I really appreciate it.

[REN]

Love ya face. See you sometime soon!

[MARTYN]

You too, my lord!

(audible sigh)

[Click]

[Click]

[MARTYN]

For the sake of archival and the benefit of the next archivist, I want to contribute my side of the story to the tape. 

So. Ren. He’s a funny guy, has a big heart. He’s a good friend.

What he’s just said all really did happen. While I can’t verify whether Death is a woman or whether dying is moist, I do admit he wasn’t really the same after he turned red.

Context here. Grian’s social experiment gave all LARPers three lives each. On your green life, you just had to survive. On your yellow life, you were supposed to be more anxious and cautious.

On your red life, you were supposed to be aggressive, and you were allowed to ‘kill’ people.

I say ‘kill’ with big air-quotes because no, you were not supposed to actually kill people.

When I pretended to behead him—

(clears throat)

Beheaded him. Actually beheaded him, I guess.

I did note a change in his behaviour. 

I chalked this up to something else. After all, that was part of his character. 

He had asked me to behead him so he could be permitted to kill his enemies, and after I killed him, he said that “Red Winter is Coming!”

Pardon the accent. I can’t do it the same as Ren. 

Speaking of which. He had some sort of accent on his last life. He never tripped over it. Some sort of inflection I’ve never understood.

Well, when I cut his head off, it actually came off.

I didn’t really think about it at first. I don’t know why. There was actually blood all over, but I had thought it was just some movie magic I didn’t understand.

I know this seems unlikely, but being Ren’s Hand? That was of my own accord. I don’t think I was brainwashed into it. 

I think I would’ve known if I had been brainwashed.

Right?

Well, my character was so…devoted to Ren’s. 

Even now, I do cherish our friendship. It’s a deep one. Love hanging out with him.

Well, him and me forever.

I hope he’s doing well.

[Click]

[stergeon]

for the writer ask

💭🚦💛 💌

💭 What inspires you and your writing?

this is a real marketing major-ass answer (from your local marketing major), but i love sharing knowledge and telling stories. writing’s one of those things that’s a bit of a compulsion for me—i’m always writing something. i took a five-year break from fiction writing before i stumbled ass-first into fanfic last year, but even in those years when i was focusing on my career, i was writing guides and trainings and a ton of other stuff—just not anything fun, lol.

writing is also so cathartic. sometimes i set out to tell a specific story, but at other times, a particular emotion gets me in a vice grip and i have to put it to words before it’ll go away. my stories tend to wind up as emotional dumping grounds as a result.

i don’t write things pulled directly from my own life, but there are bits and pieces of myself and things that have happened to me scattered throughout stuff i’ve written, and usually when i’m about 75% of the way through a piece, i’ll realize it’s absolutely related to something i’m currently going through. funny how art works that way, even when you don’t intend for it to.

and occasionally i just have a fire lit under my ass about an issue and i get so hot about it that i gotta compile my thoughts. looking at you, silver snow

🚦 What sort of endings do you prefer to write: ambiguous, bad, happily ever after, etc.?

look, i would love nothing more for them girls (pick whichever girls you please) to have a happy ending where they kiss and are stupid in love for the rest of forever. i love reading those kinds of stories. but in my heart of hearts, i love an ambiguous ending. i like when there are still questions after the story ends. i like thinking about where things could go or how the characters will go on after the events of the story. like, shared space could be read as having a happy ending, but i don’t really think it is. and with the victors; the vestiges, well. you’ll see :0)

come to think of it, i’m not sure i’ve ever written a happily-ever-after, but i don’t think i’ve ever written a 100% bad ending, either. i read too many bury-your-gays stories and watched too many sad european queer coming-of-age films in my youth to ever be happy putting that kinda thing out into the world. i want to write about love with all its ugliness, but not despair or hopelessness. i think what most appeals to me about an ambiguous ending is that lingering feeling of hope. it’s not the same as the kind you get from a happily-ever-after, and something about it speaks to me.

💛 What is the most impactful lesson you’ve learned about writing?

honestly? how to take criticism. i took a creative writing class in high school where we had to read our work out loud and then receive feedback on it from the other writers in the class, and that did a lot for me. going into that class, i’d already been writing for forever and had won some little local writing contests and such, so i was a wee bit of a pretentious douche. but i’d never gotten real critique before beyond, essentially, spelling and grammar checks. it humbled me lol. it made me grow so much as a writer, and i could see where i needed to improve or where my head was wedged way too far up my own ass for others to follow. it also helped me recognize strengths i didn’t know i had, and that was huge. it’s easy to get into a self-doubt spiral when making creative work, and good, constructive criticism can do so much to help avoid that.

to this day i love critique. i like knowing what worked or didn’t work so that i can continue to improve as a writer and do better next time. did my themes land? did something really work, but another part fall flat? i’d love to know!! i try to treat everything i write as practice for the next thing, and frankly that’s helped take some of the pressure off so i don’t go into total Perfectionist Mode.

i know critique is kind of a sensitive topic in fan spaces, but i think that’s because a lot of people have gotten unsolicited criticism that is purely critical and isn’t constructive. but getting good, constructive criticism will do so much to help a person grow as a writer. it’s scary, and sometimes it hurts! writing is very personal for most people, and it stings when things aren’t received the way you think they will be. but i know i’ve grown more from having my failures pointed out (and, very importantly, having the good things about those efforts acknowledged) than anything else.

💌 Is there a favorite trope you like to write?

actually Just answered this in another ask!