#i’m trying to think of a fun and silly new year’s resolution (inspired by the Pasta Quest post) and i would appreciate some ideas!

[worm-on-a-blog]

woahh 2024! cheers!

happy new year. worms are rooting for you to have your best year yet.

[churchkey]

2020 Writing Wrapped

I was tagged by the lovely and talented @anthrobrat and one of my resolutions is to do the stuff people tag me for (and also, Laura is just wonderful and I’m lucky that she’s my friend) so I’ll give this a twirl. 

Rules: It’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 8(ish) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome work.

I don’t know if I can make it to eight but we’ll see. Here’s a fun story - I used to be in this fandom back when we just shared stuff in a super-secret private community on LJ because many of the IRL guys were still alive and we were horrified of people finding out about us. But that was like 15 years ago and a lot has changed so here I am back on my bullshit and really so grateful that this fandom is still around because my love for this series and the very beautiful actors responsible for the fictionalized versions of the IRL guys and their crazy passionate ships who live rent-free in my soul has not dimmed a bit. So THANK YOU for being here and reading my stories inspiring me with YOUR stories and headcannons and being my friends. 

So here we go. All of these are Winnix, btw. Someday I’ll learn to write for another ship. 

Total (posted) Word Count: 119,294

1. A Spell of Riot (E) This is hands-down, no question, the fic I am most proud of having finished, not just this year but in all of my fandom career. I got the idea to write it from a kiss prompt last summer, just a light little thing about Dick saying goodbye to Lew as he drops him off for alcohol treatment. I never dreamed it would turn into 62k of something into which I ended up pouring three months of love and stress and tears and fairly painstaking research. The feedback I’ve gotten from you about this has been so incredibly humbling and I truly believe I’ve become a more compassionate person from this experience. You just never know what invisible battles people are fighting. I feel lucky to have had this opportunity to tell this part of their story.

2. It Is My Heart That’s Late (E) This was the first thing I ever wrote for the LLSS prompt meme, so it was kind of the first step I took toward actually being a part of the community rather than just going about my work in silence and isolation (which, tbh, I still do... I’m just that kind of writer, but I’m trying to get better about connecting with other creators). For this one I got to flex my description muscles, which was probably the biggest challenge of this story. I wanted to make readers feel immersed in the whole sensual world of Iowa in the summertime, as well as the inner nostalgic world of lovers coming back together after five years. It was also the first time I wrote an OC and had a lot of fun channeling what I think my mom/aunts would have been like at that age (as the whole thing was based on what she’s told me about growing up in that place at that time... Dick as the hired man is based on her family’s hired man, Tommy, who lived in a little cottage on their back 40. Sorry that’s probably more than you want to know.) ANYWAY. I was really happy with the subtlety (I think) I was able to bring out in the way their love has changed over the time they’ve been apart. And I got Dick’s ass to Chicago, finally!

3. Roger Wilco (E) I like this one because I think it’s the ultimate Porn with Feelings, even though when I started I tried to just make it straight-up porn. But I’m a sucker for them being completely smitten with each other, and those feelings sort of bleeding into everything they do/say/think/feel. I also think it’s pretty hot, if I do say so myself. Describing Dick pleasuring himself is like... maybe my favorite thing to write about with him, sex-wise. 

4. Things He Cannot Lose (T) The very first story I posted when I came back to the BoB fandom was Long Ago and Far Away, but that was a collection of ficlets I’d written many years ago. This one was the first new thing I’d written in many many years and it felt so freaking good to be writing again, and being in these guys’ heads again, and trying to do justice to the pining and brooding and angsting and loving. It was also the first peek of erection-probs Lew, which you all know by now is a thing I love to work in whenever I can. Sweet, drunk, lovelorn mess that he is, bless his soul. 

5. Free Kittens (T) It’s so silly but I’m proud of this one because I feel like I can’t write fluff and, aside from some of Dick’s decidedly non-fluffy attitudes toward the barn kittens, I think I managed to make it pure, uncomplicated domestic fluff. I hope so, anyway. I also freed myself of my narrative structure of staying in one character’s POV for an entire scene, trying instead to do a little more free indirect discourse and float back and forth between them. So even though it’s silly AF, this one has poked its sharp little claws into my heart. 

And I’m awful at the tagging thing and feel like I'm just annoying people by tagging them and also that they’ve already been tagged a million times but here we go @speirtongirl and @rillalala

[norcumii]

Feral!Kenobi plunnie

I’ve a ridiculous partial plunnie, and no idea what to do with it.

So here it is for the internets, hopefully someone wants to play with it because beyond pretty visuals and some silliness I got nothing. Also, much mock grumpy gesticulating must be made towards @dharmaavocado  because I’m sure I was inspired by her talk of Amnesia AUs (and her recent Leverage AU snippet was inadvertently what kicked things off, so thbbbbbt). Also thanks to @dogmatix because she helped plot SHENANIGANS.

*****

SO! AU time! It’s been like, at least 2 years of this damned war, and Rex is now in a stage of P I N I N G for a certain General Kenobi. He’s professional enough to not ever say a thing, and Kenobi seems ignorant. That’s good enough, right?

Then Kenobi faffs off somewhere, as he is wont to do, and disappears for about a week. The 212th has been left to handle themselves like the ADULTS THEY ARE, while Skywalker, Ahsoka, and Rex sail off to rescue someone’s moronic ass. They follow his trail (no I have no idea what that’s a trail of, which is yet another reason I’m not writing this for reals) to some obscure planet and a weird Sithy type temple thing that looks ominous and feels even creepier in the Force. There’s not much to this temple thing, and the main chamber’s roof has caved in.

That looks recent. As a matter of fact, a bunch of the rocks have been cleared away, like someone was underneath them at the time they came down. There’s a decent amount of blood, too –  

Along with the crushed remains of a familiar lightsaber. Also something the Jedi can tentatively identify as some kind of Sith artifact, though according to Ahsoka (she geeked out about some old relics in the Archives for a project several years ago), no one knows what they might have done.

Fuck. So good news, Obi-Wan is probably alive – the rocks look like they were moved from underneath, not from the outside. Bad news, his lightsaber is toast and there was a mysterious Sith artifact involved. There’s no hint of which was cause and which effect: a lightsaber can be rigged to cause an explosion; the roof could’ve trashed it and the artifact when it came down; the artifact could’ve caused who knows what kind of damage.

They spread out to search the area a bit more closely. Rex is prepared for trouble, but something still gets the drop on him. One minute he’s prowling around checking the bushes, the next something is tackling him. If he weren’t a well-trained soldier and a clone genetically tweaked to keep up with Jedi, he’d be dead. As it is, there’s a scruffy cloaked figure trying to kill him with a set of fancy ritual knives that had to have come from the temple. They tussle for a bit, Rex JUST managing to keep them at bay while getting in a few good hits. The Jedi finally charge in to the rescue, Force shoving the figure into a wall.

The hood of his cloak finally falls, and Obi-Wan Kenobi is looking at them like he has no idea who they are.

*****

There’s possibly a bit more fighting before the trio’s certainty that it’s someone they know and care about sinks in enough to convince Kenobi to back down and listen. See, he has no idea who he is, or who they are, or a lot of things, really. His memories overall are just gone – no hints, no remnants, no suspicious feelings. His skills are all there, including the Force, though he doesn’t always know he’s using things. He just does stuff. General knowledge is fuzzy – he knows about the Republic, but while for instance he knows there’s a chancellor fuckall if he knows who it is.

The other three are Very Concerned, and take him back to the Twilight, then/or the Resolute. Anakin has investigating to do, Ahsoka can research from the ship, and Rex is trying to grapple with the knowledge that after the fact, in retrospect, Feral!Kenobi almost killing him was disturbingly HOT (oh help what do?). Jedi don’t fight like that, this is not normal, and Rex is very, very confused.

*****

“Feral” is accurate. Kenobi doesn’t seem to give many shits about societal niceties (he can observe them, he just doesn’t have much reason to care), and he keeps his shiny knives and just prowls around the place. He’s sparred with a number of the ARCs on board, and kicked ass in ways that The General would not do – also hot, though the general consensus is that the contrast between this new Kenobi and the old one is just too jarring and weird to overcome chain of command and propriety. He doesn’t have the serenity or the tendency of the General to sink into the background: it’s not that he’s arrogant, it’s just that this is a man who has no memories of why he might be uncertain about himself or his place in the world.

*****

This weird little dance goes on for at least another week. It’s late evening, and Rex is almost at his cabin, almost able to faceplant in his bunk and contemplate how these new circumstances are beyond weird and just fucked up. Then Kenobi stalks up to Rex in the empty corridor, and from the way he rakes a look over the Captain, he can tell the aggressive thing is a turn on. He doesn’t waste any time before speaking. “I’ve been feeling you pining halfway across the ship, and it is a very large ship. Did we used to fuck?”

The floor doesn’t open and swallow Rex whole, unfortunately. He tries to stammer out a few things, which is interesting because he has no idea what he might possibly say. Kenobi steps closer, and Rex backs right up to his door. “That’s a no, then. Might be fun to.” He plants a hand on Rex’s breastplate, pushing enough for the pressure to be felt but not enough to actually trap him. “Interested?”

“General–!”

“No.” It’s like all the intensity just cuts off, for all that Kenobi doesn’t pull back, doesn’t move an inch. “Not anymore. I don’t remember being him, for all we know I won’t ever remember being him. I’ll use the name, but not the title. That’s not who I am now.”

“But you might be.” The notion’s plagued him a bit, helped keep a bit of reserve in the face of this man stalking through the halls, utterly certain of himself. “Isn’t that how it goes in the holos? Second crack on the head, forget everything between that and the first one?”

“That’s not how head injuries work,” Kenobi says, dry as he used to be, even as his posture and attitude are still sex on wheels. “There’s no decent explanation for this, several possible causes, and that’s a problem for the other me if he ever comes back. Would it make life difficult for you, if we fucked?”

Little gods, he wishes Kenobi would stop saying it like that, and the bastard can probably tell, and it doesn’t help that the aggressive thing and the attitude are intriguing. “Probably,” he admits with more honesty than he really intends.

Like that Kenobi is several paces back, hands to himself though the posture is still predatory. “Then it’s all your call, Captain. If you’re interested, I’m sure you can find me if you come looking.” He turns, takes two steps, then pauses and glances back. That is sultry in the way the rest was all matter of fact, direct. “Hm. We might have to try that.”

Try what? Rex’s brain manages to ask, before ‘come looking’ sinks in and he just goes red. Fucking asshole of not-really-a-general has already disappeared by then, of course.

*****

So that all builds to some aggressive smutty fun times, because Feral!Kenobi loves pushing (and making Rex blush) and once he’s over the initial reactions Rex enjoys pushing back. For reasons unknown I don’t think Obi-Wan ever gets his memories back, but he’s FAR less likely to fall for persuasive bullshit and political idiocy than in canon.

No idea where or how that goes, though. Just pretty mental images of Feral!Kenobi who thinks fighting is right next door to fucking in terms of a good time, and Rex who is flailing along realizing this hits a LOT of kinks he did not know he had.

~end

[go-events]

GO Rom Com Spotlight: @micky-r-c

The compelling @micky-r-c (also MickyRC on AO3) has claimed The Princess Bride to adapt for Good Omens in the Good Omens Rom Com Event.

For reference, here’s a little background about the source material!

About The Princess Bride: A kindly grandfather sits down with his ill grandson and reads him a story. The story is one that has been passed down from father to son for generations. As the grandfather reads the story, the action comes alive. The story is a classic tale of love and adventure as the beautiful Buttercup, engaged to the odious Prince Humperdinck, is kidnapped and held against her will in order to start a war, It is up to Westley (her childhood beau, now returned as the Dread Pirate Roberts) to save her. On the way he meets a thief and his hired helpers, an accomplished swordsman and a huge, super strong giant, both of whom become Westley's companions in his quest.

We spent some time chatting about how the adaptation is coming so far, as well as future plans for it! Now, get to know @micky-r-c a little better!

* * *

goromcom: You know how if you open a Tumblr chat with someone you haven't chatted to before, Tumblr tells you two things they post about? I wanted to tell you that yours reports that you post "about #good omens fanart and #holiday fic". Do especially enjoy holiday-themed fics?

micky-r-c: Wow, no I would not have expected that. I mean I love a good huddling for warmth or holiday decorating fic, but I don't go out of my way for them.  But I did get really settled into writing Good Omens fic right around the end of November, and I thought, for some reason, that it would be a good idea to do not one, but two advent calendar series.  Didn't finish either of them, but there was a solid two weeks in there where I had two posts a day tagged holiday fic, so I guess that's where that came from.

goromcom: Hey, anything that gets the creativity moving, right? So it’s great that the advent projects inspired you to put out that much content! But let’s look forward to some new content: your rom com! You chose to adapt The Princess Bride. Has this movie been a favorite of yours, or is there some other reason you chose it? 

micky-r-c: Full disclosure here, I'm not a big romcom watcher.  Romcom fic reader, absolutely, but I didn't know most of the movies on the list.  So when I saw Princess Bride on there it was kind of a combination of "Oh!  I know one!" and "Gasp, I could write a sword fight." And now here we are.

goromcom: What's your favorite moment of the movie, and are you looking forward to presenting it in your adaptation? Any loose plans for that scene that you can share?

micky-r-c: There most definitely is.  I bounced between a few concepts for this adaptation, but the scene right at the beginning of Princess Bride when Buttercup realizes the meaning of "as you wish" has me by the heartstrings, and I am very excited to write my Good Omens version (spoiler alert: it happens in 1967).

goromcom: 1967 is such a gift for the GO fandom, how amazing of Neil to give that to us as new content for the mini-series. :) Other than adapting the “as you wish” realization, do you plan to stick very closely to the beats of the original story, or make bigger changes?

micky-r-c: Yeah, pretty close.  I'm not doing an AU, so in weaving the two plots together I'm trying really hard not to lose too much of The Princess Bride, especially since it's such a classic.  I want it to have that specific silly-yet-heartfelt feeling the movie has, which, to be fair, Good Omens lines up with pretty nicely.

goromcom: This movie definitely has a unique feel to it, and I can absolutely see not wanting to poke an alchemy like that too strongly! Given your resolution to preserve that silly/heartfelt tone of the movie, I’m sure you’ve had to make a lot of careful decisions thus far. Perhaps there’s a particularly interesting decision you've made in your planning so far--a notable casting decision, a changing of venue, that you can share with us?

micky-r-c: So I've actually changed the timeline maybe... 6 times so far?  Yeah. It's been everywhere.  But I finally landed on just overlapping with canon in the immediate lead up to the apocadon't, which I'm super happy with.  It means I can have some serious fun with how things could have gone differently.  Plus, I'll be honest, I am very excited to write the Princess Bride version of the wall slam. That one's gonna be A Lot.

goromcom: You can’t see me, but I’m gleefully rubbing my hands together thinking about it. However, I feel like we’re verging on giving too much away, so let’s move on to the wrap-up. I am blatantly stealing this last question from The Good Place: The Podcast, but here goes: Tell me something "good". It can be something big or small. It can be a charity you think is doing good work, or you can talk about how great your pet is.

micky-r-c: Ya know, every time I've seen a spotlight I've thought to myself, wow, I should really start thinking about my answer to that.  Plot twist, I forgot to.  But anyway, one thing that's been really unbelievably good for me recently has been the community I've found through Good Omens.  I've been hanging around the edges of fandom for years, but within maybe a month of posting my first Good Omens fic I was talking to people, getting to beta read things, working up the nerve to leave long rambly comments on ao3... all the stuff I'd always wanted to be doing but never had the community support to build on.  So that's been a literal dream come true, and things like this event have all been a big part of it, so thank you for running it and giving us all this wonderful gift!!!

goromcom: Aww, well, I agree about the GO fandom being amazing. It’s been so much fun so far and I hope we keep on with it for a long time to come. :)

And while we’re all basking in the amazingness that is the Good Omens fandom, don’t forget to keep an eye out for the GO adaptation of The Princess Bride, coming soon!

[scrumptiousalpacadeer]

Erm….hello. Dweller on the Threshold

“I’m a Dweller on the Threshold. I don’t want to wait no more...’ Van Morrison

OK, here goes, I’m going in. I’m starting a blog. I’ve been a dweller on the threshold of blog fun and I ain’t waiting no more. I’m crossing over. Whoooosh. This is big; very big. Huge. It might not be for you, dear reader, wherever and whoever you may be, but I’m a resolute technophobe; my natural inclination is for the good old ink pen and foolscap....but the thing is, its time for a change. Its time to loosen up a little - throw caution to the wind. Screw it. The poisonous clogged bowels of Covid lockdown are beginning to loosen, and we can’t stop what’s coming. There’s no going back; the old world has died and it’s time to ring in the new one...whatever form that takes.

This feels weird - but then writing always does I suppose...I’m writing and I don’t know where this will go, who will read it, if anyone will read it, where it will land...but then, isn’t this time just like that?....the worlds cogs are creaking again, the wheel is turning, and I don’t know if its just me, but each day now feels a little like a jump in the dark. Will my friend want to hug me? Do I ask for a hug or just jump in, risking acute humiliation? Was this all just a weird dream? Have I become agoraphobic? Have I become claustrophobic? Have I forgotten how to drive on A roads? Will I ever trust my fellow man fully again? WHEN can I go to live gig?!! 

QUICK STORY: BEGINNING the other day I met my massage therapist outside our local store (I realise I have deliberately said ‘my massage therapist’ there to try and impress you, dear reader, so that you think I’m a sort of really well established lady of a certain ilk, well heeled, monied, established, so I can say things like ‘my massage therapist’ as if I own a long line of therapists that are at my beck and call. TRUTH ALERT: I am none of the above. I am usually extremely scruffy; often wear pyjamas till 3pm; haven’t brushed my hair for five years and...ok I might as well get this out the way now...I was born and raised in a shitty concrete offshoot of Luton - get the picture?.... To continue, this amazing woman (I shall call her Geraldine) gives me the most astonishing massage once a month. She has done this for two years pretty much, since my dear sister in law got me a massage gift voucher. She does therapeutic massage and her hands are made of magic - after her massages I generally sleep for 10 hours solid -...So I’ve been REALLY missing her massages, my poor body is so tense and lopsided after three months sans massage, I swear I’ve got a gait like the hunchback of Notredame; - anyway, anyway. 

So I meet Geraldine outside the Store and after a lovely chat I jump in... ‘so, erm’ are you up for a hug?’....’Erm, no’ she said. I felt a bit silly, but then she said, ‘you’re going to make me cry now, because that's the thing I miss most’. The thing is, she explained, she has to be careful because her daughter-in-law is very vulnerable...so no hugging was cool. And it kind of felt like a hug because in our hearts we wanted to. She’s really astonishing, is Geraldine. MY massage therapist daaaaarling. I can’t wait for her to get her gorgeous hands on me again - only two weeks to go before she lays me out and corrects my messed up hypermobile stretchy little forty five year old body. END OF QUICK STORY. 

I’m starting a blog and my intention is to fill it, when I can, as inspiration comes in, with stories, observations, monologues, maybe the odd poem - who knows; whatever comes in... for your delight, pleasure, annoyance at times, and I would hope, occasional astonishment and revelation. There will be many references to music and film no doubt...I would like to make the following Blog pledges: I promise to always be truthful. I promise to write from the heart, as much as I can; I promise to love and respect my readers as best I can (assuming I have any)…  

I don’t know how long a Blog post is meant to be - but I think I’ll sign off now. To my fellow Dwellers on the Threshold of the new world...thank you so much for listening. I think tomorrow I will tell you about the story behind the background picture (The Virgin Mary with the Owl on her head and the significance of this image and how I came to buy this picture) and also my Avatar image Hawkgirl and how I believe she wreaked havoc on my landladies. 

Love and Punk Skylark blessings From Christine xxx 

[precuredaily]

Precure Day 162

Episode: Yes! Precure 5 14 - “Karen, The Troubled Student Council President” Date watched: 3 December 2019 Original air date: 6 May 2007 Screenshots: https://imgur.com/a/ZVrof8Y Project info and master list of posts: http://tinyurl.com/PCDabout

Karen has a big think

It’s Karen’s turn to hold the character development conch. This time, we get to see how she handles pressure from all directions! We also find out a little secret about Otaka-san and the school’s leadership. Good stuff, so let’s dive in!

The Plot

Various clubs approach Karen, aggressively requesting budget increases. The futsal club can’t afford new balls, the drama club can’t afford costumes, the judo club can’t afford new weights, the list goes on. Karen is taken aback and tries to explain the complexities of the situation to the students, but they are insistent. After trying to come up with a solution, she approaches the Vice Principal and explains her situation, requesting a budget increase for all the clubs. He is reluctant to change the budget that’s already been agreed upon for the year, but because he respects her decision to approach him, he will take it up with the principal. The VP goes to the Principal, revealed (to the audience) to actually be Otaka-san the lunch lady, but she insists that she doesn’t believe they need a budget increase, and there are still solutions the clubs haven’t yet come up with to resolve their budget woes. Komachi talks with Karen, commending her willingness to work hard for the clubs where before she probably would have simply said that the budget was already decided and they had to make do with what they had. The influence of their determined young friends is rubbing off on them.

Coincidentally, Nightmare is also having budget issues of a sort. Although they aren’t in a pinch, Kawarino is scolding Bunbee for blowing a lot of money without producing any results, and implies that his subordinates are useless and the whole department could get restructured. Bunbee decides to go fight the girls himself to get some results.

Back at school, Karen is still being hounded by the clubs, and her attempts at de-escalation aren’t working, so Otaka almost steps in, but Komachi is actually the one to put her foot down, startling everyone. She reminds the club leaders that they agreed to their annual budgets before the proposal was sent to the school administration, and that Karen alone cannot solve everything. With help from Nozomi, she gets them all to line up and explain their problems, to see if they can work together and figure out alternative solutions within their existing budgets.

The biggest offender is the drama club, which is going way over budget because they’ve picked a play with lots of extravagant costumes. However, Komachi gets them to work with the sewing club, who were looking for a platform to display their work, and the two split costs in this mutually beneficial agreement. The Judo club couldn’t afford to buy new weights AND new uniforms, but they also got the sewing club to patch up their uniforms so they could buy heavier weights, and donated their older ones to the futsal club. Now that she doesn’t need to buy weights, Rin can afford new balls, and donates the old ones to the art club, who find their shape and texture very inspirational.

I’d like to point out that the dumbbell Nozomi is struggling to lift is only 5 KG, that’s about 11 lbs.

With everyone’s issues resolved, the girls enjoy a moment of peace as Rin takes her new dumbbells to her club space, but on the way, Bunbee shows up to cause trouble. He turns the dumbbells into a Kowaina and taunts the girls about his own superiority. They transform and fight back, but he is pretty strong. When Mint shields one of the monster’s attacks, he launches a missile that breaks the shield, and he easily dodges when Rouge and Aqua try to fight him in the air. Dream and Lemonade have no luck fighting the Kowaina and they’re all left on the ground, defeated. Bunbee boasts about how much easier it is to do everything himself, and Aqua scoffs. She says she used to feel that way, but now she knows they’d never win if they did that, and the team springs into action. Bunbee tries to missile them again, and again Mint uses her shield, but this time Aqua also blocks it with Aqua Stream and this weakens it enough to bounce off the shield. Dream and Rouge restrain the Kowaina while Lemonade attacks it with Lemonade Flash, then the two throw it and perform their finishers. The Kowaina is destroyed and Bunbee retreats, self-justifying the day by saying you have to spend money to make money.

Back at the lunch table, Nozomi observes that Komachi might actually be stronger than Karen, which gives them all pause. Otaka comes over with a basket full of yakisoba bread, claiming the principal told her how they avoided a budget crisis, and suddenly people from all the other clubs appear, all vying for some of the free bread. Nozomi cries because the crowd beat her to the stuff she really wanted, and that’s the ending card.

The Analysis

What a fun episode. Karen’s commitment to the students is really earnest and inspiring. You can see why she’s the president, and even how much progress she’s made since the start of the show. Old Karen just cared about order, new Karen has the best interests of the students in mind and wants to meet them where they’re at. She fields the ire of the various clubs like a champ, trying not to get overwhelmed, and explaining the delicate balance that is adjusting budgets: since the budget has already been agreed upon, for her to allocate more to one group than previously agreed means the money has to come out of somewhere else, and that could put the other party in a pinch. Important financial lesson for the kids in the audience, too. And when her advice isn’t sufficient for them, she goes to bat for them by requesting assistance from the VP. My only criticism is that she probably should have asked why they needed more money first to see where their funds were tied up at, but honestly I would probably do the same thing, jumping straight to “let me get them what they say they need” and not “let me look into the situation more”.

When they get to the drama club and find out the reason they’re so over budget is because they decided to produce an expensive-ass play, I about died. LOOK AT THIS OUTFIT.

gosh I wonder why

There’s a lesson in here somewhere about working within your limitations. Urara suggests they do a simpler show like Kintarou, which would have costumes and props they could reuse in other shows, but from the club president’s response I get the impression they’ve done far too many shows like that and are sick of it. Also can’t fault them for doing something different. I remember in my junior year (11th grade), my school put on a production of “High School Musical” (this was when that was still a pretty fresh and hot property) and it sold like crazy, so the next year they were able to perform “Little Shop of Horrors”, renting the Audrey II puppets from somewhere. It’s okay to dream big, but you gotta make sure you can afford it. (inb4 ok boomer) However, working with the sewing club was a very good compromise. They get a platform to showcase their work, the drama club gets good costumes for cheaper, and they split the costs. Some of the other deals are a bit more one-sided but as long as everyone’s happy, it works.

By the way, Komachi’s restraint when the club president goes “oh yeah we spent all our budget on that one outfit and we need a bunch more” is remarkable. (I looked it up and I see similarities to Les Miserables: it’s a famous story that takes place over multiple generations and features LOTS of recurring characters) Komachi is, thankfully, very good at keeping herself in check, but if you manage to set her off, she is downright scary. That’s a common attribute for shield-based Cures, and it started here.

For reasons that aren’t entirely clear, since they only have a few of the costumes done, the drama club president is only ever seen in-costume, looking like a prince with a pencil mustache drawn onto her face. If we take the bold assumption that this all occurs in one day, even one lunch period, then this makes sense enough, but it’s still kind of silly.

The first half of this episode is so good, and tells a pretty complete story, that both times I watched it I forgot what kind of show it was because I was so absorbed in the antics of the clubs, so I thought the resolution was just going to be sorting out their budgets, when that was actually only the halfway point. The fight with Bunbee in the second half, while good, feels incomplete. I’m not sure if something got lost in translation for the subtitles, because he seems to indicate he spent money on a better Kowaina mask but the subs don’t reflect him saying this, only the girls’ response that it looks the same as normal. I do like them switching up their fighting style, and it comes with one of the strangest calls to action I’ve ever seen:

previously unsaid sentences in human history

The context is that, earlier in the episode, Nozomi and Urara traded lunch items, and now Karen is reminding them all to trade opponents and work together to beat the monster. Hilariously, even though Nozomi was the one who wanted to trade in the first place, she’s the last one to get this coded message, after Rin explains it to her.

She is special.

The elephant in the room here is that Otaka-san, the humble lunch lady who always adds a million onto every order, who appears a little disheveled, is in fact the school’s principal. Books and covers, ya know. I don’t recall if the girls every learn her secret, but it’s revealed to the audience here. I assume she serves as the lunch lady in order to get close to the students and understand what’s going on without calling attention to her position of authority. That’s the thing about power, even if you act relatable, if someone knows you’re way above them on the totem pole, they’re going to act differently, so she has put herself on the level of students. It’s like Undercover Boss except she never reveals the ruse. And honestly, it’s a very good ruse. She is approachable to the students and they all love her, so she can listen to their problems and make sure that the school is running well from the ground level. Also, as the lunch lady, she wears plain clothes, an apron, and flat shoes. Her only accessory is her trademark silver brooch. As the principal, she wears a suit, her hair is more tamed, she wears lipstick and earrings. She even speaks differently between her roles, sounding more raspy in her disguise, while she adopts a more formal and stern tone while acting as the principal. It’s impressive. I know she appears in this role at least one more time in the show, so I look forward to seeing that.

As usual there were some great moments of comedy, wonderful facial expressions, and you can see those chronicled in the gallery.

Next time, in Precure Daily, Nozomi’s mom is sick, so she has to do the housework! How badly will this end?

Pink Precure Catchphrase Count: 0 kettei!

[gffa]

Scattered Star Wars thoughts: - I am a third of the way through Dooku: Jedi Lost for the purpose of capping things to collate all the info we have about the Jedi Order and I’m already at like 75 of them, and OKAY sure a lot of them will go into a single post (like, “So, what kind of classes do the Jedi have?”) but that’s still KIND OF A LOT.  I am so looking forward to getting to be a super nerd about all of the info.  :D - I finished Alphabet Squadron by finally giving up on the last 10% (I was really dragging through the final air battle because I’m not big on space fighter action scenes) and switching over to the audiobook.  I think that was a smart move and I wish I’d done it sooner--the narrator is very good and the sound effects added a lot to the action scenes. The book ended as it always was--an exhausting read, but in a really good way, where it was heartbreaking and definitely there weren’t a lot of bright spots to be found, this is not a happy, peppy group, but it was full of complicated, messy people trying to figure themselves and their place in the galaxy out. It’s a book that I kept thinking about how there’s often a call for more morally gray characters and, if you want that, this book delivers like hell.  While all of them have it to some degree or other (except maybe Wyl), Yrica Quell is the heart of the story and she is messy and not always nice and doesn’t always do the right thing and is really complicated.  Which worked really well for a street-level character like this, I think she’s one of the best new additions to the franchise over the last year! Also, there’s nods to a lot of established stuff--Chass’ thoughts about Jyn Erso got me RIGHT in the feelings place, Hera had some amazing cameos--and I’m very much looking forward to the second book!  DEFINITELY RECOMMENDED. - I finished Spark of the Resistance and I’ll give the caveat that my affection for it probably got a boost from having a Saga characters-focused novel again (as much as I love novel originated characters, there were a lot of them lately and not a lot of Saga characters appearing in books), but I genuinely think it was a fantastic read.  It’s very light-hearted but doesn’t sacrifice the emotional warmth for that, there are a few moments of genuine character heartache and introspection, but mostly it’s a straightforward adventure with a ton of absolutely adorable character moments woven into it. Rey, Poe, and Rose might seem like a bit of an odd combination to throw together, since they’ve had very little interaction in the movies (with a bit more in the comics and novels), but it worked like an absolute charm here.  They have great chemistry together, lots of moments of each of them being cute or hilarious, making it one of those books that was just sheer joy and fun to read.  It’s the kind of book that just really sparkled the whole way through, perfect if you’re looking for something lighter and bouncier to read.  It’s not frivolous or silly, but instead cute and uplifting and hopeful.  Which is really, really nice to see something uplifting coming to the Resistance after all the crap they’ve been through.  ABSOLUTELY RECOMMENDED. - I also finished Way of the Apprentice, which is pretty much in line with all my feelings on Watson’s writing--there are things don’t really work for me (usually worldbuilding stuff, because they were written before Revenge of the Sith came out, much less The Clone Wars) but when Watson writes a killer line, her lines are killer.  There were at least three different sections on Anakin that really had me pausing to think about what they revealed about his character (which is pretty good for a book that’s only about 160 pages) and, of course, I’m crying over Obi-Wan Kenobi as I always do, which is about all I can ask out of a book. I don’t know that I would recommend it, but that’s more to do with the ratio of quotable/meta-inspiring amount of stuff versus the action plot that took up the majority of the story.  Which, you know, a book needs a plot, but sometimes I do feel like I really only had a snack re: characterization, rather than a full meal.  Which, in fairness, is probably a lot due to the nature of the audience these books are for, rather than me reading them as an adult!  I loved what I got out of it, but it was a lot of pages to read for those glimpses of the good stuff. But, ultimately, I’m very glad I read it and it’s softened me up a lot towards Watson’s series here, which maybe has a lot to do with that I (so far) really like her Anakin.  I was wary of him because I kind of hated the way she wrote Dooku in Legacy of the Jedi, I feared she’d write Anakin as the same sort of destined-to-be-evil-from-birth rather than a good person who made bad choices, but so far he’s got so much good in him but also all these issues that he’s refusing to let go of, and I really enjoyed him here.  MY PRECIOUS ASSHOLE CAT SON I LOVE HIM is basically the reaction I wan to have with any Anakin book and this one provided! Scattered Star Wars Thoughts/2019 Resolutions Update: - Alphabet Squadron - Allegiance #1 - The Star Wars Show 2019.10.09 -  Jedi Quest: The Way of the Apprentice - Spark of the Resistance Current total:  319/520

[sapphic-story]

When the End Arrives

New Years’ writing inspired by @alexprompts with When the End Arrives! 1k kind of silly thing feat. two characters from a new WIP that I’m still trying to get a feel on personality wise.

It only took a few minutes for Juniper to find Rylan in all the chaos.

It would have been a greater testament of their bond if it wasn’t so obvious. Slipping away from all the colorful flashing lights, apart from the festive popping and cheering masses and terrible, terrible catchy dance tunes, to have a private audience with the near midnight sky and the roaring sea?

Yes, that sounded like her Rylan.

Sure enough, she found them out on the terrace, silhouetted by the house’s glow behind them. They sat on the side railing silently, back to the party roaring behind the two. The floor rumbled in unison with the distant speaker’s boosted bass as Juniper called out.

“You know, if you fall off that thing, I’m not going to dive for you.”

Rylan didn’t reply for a few moments, as Juniper expected. They didn’t turn their attention from the ocean as they called back. Quieter, softer, but still cutting through the air.

“I have a little more balance than do something like that.”

(Contrary to popular belief, Juniper would dive for them if they fell. Always. After all, she’s always falling for Rylan. Only fair, right?)

The stars seem to wrap themselves in surrounding dark clouds as they hid from mortal view, the moon shining a brilliant white in their place. A bit disappointing for what was supposed to be one of the most important days of the year, decade even, but it didn’t look like Rylan minded much. Juniper edged over to the terrace railings and carefully hiked her legs over to join them. 

“Did you even join the party at all?” Juniper asked, a bit taunting in her voice.

“Mmmmm...I think I went down around ten for some punch and talked to a couple people for a few minutes. Then I found a dog and we hung out for a while before coming up here.”

“Ah, of course.”

Rylan silently passed her a small stick, almost offhandedly, which Juniper took with a bit of a confused chuckle. She held it up above her head to observe in the party lights.

“Huh, where’d you get sparklers from?” She pulled it back in front of her, squinting at it in the dark. “I mean, I guess it’s appropriate to ring in the new year with, eh?”

“Found them while looking for last minute gifts.” They shrugged, holding up an identical stick in her other hand. “Thought you might think it’s fun.”

Juniper closed her eyes and muttered a couple igniting words over the stick, then snapped her fingers. The sparkler came to life, first in fire, then quickly giving away to a mini explosion of color, excited sparks cackling and fluttering off somewhere into the dark below. 

“Hey! There we go!” Juniper cheered as she held the stick at arms length to admire the colored flames, then tipped it towards Rylan’s own stick to light it as well.

“If stuff like that was on the exam, I would have passed with...flying colors.”

She elbowed Rylan with a couple “eh? Eh?”s, to which she only received rolled eyes.

“How did your exam go, by the way?” Rylan asked, once Juniper had settled.

“How did your conversation with your dad go?” Juniper shot back.

They let out a little huff, the closest to a laugh Juniper was going to get. A little sardonic smile played on their lips as they replied, “Fair.” 

Juniper opened her arms out to the forests and beaches below them, gaze set to the skyline.

“Isn’t it just insane to imagine that a whole decade is ending today?” She lowered her arms a little as she looked toward Rylan, who watched her with an intense gaze. “We’re going into completely new territory in just a few minutes.”

“The new decade doesn’t really start until 2021. It’s 2011 to 2020.” They commented in return. Juniper sticked an accusing finger at them.

“Hey, don’t try to ruin my fun with your logic! A decade can be nine years if I say it is.” Rylan let out another amused huff as they rolled their eyes and turned back to the ever rolling sea waves.

The wind picked up suddenly, sending Juniper into involuntary shivers. She knew Rylan had to be frigid by now, simply clad in their usual button up and dress pants and no jacket in sight, but they show no signs of effect from the cold. She already knew from past experience that any attempts to give Rylan her jacket would be quickly and stubbornly rebuffed.

“Got any New Year’s resolutions?” She ventured instead. 

Rylan shook their head. “You?”

“You know I’m always trying to do better in school. Maybe this year’ll finally be the year I get an A in one of my classes. Or a B. Or anything above just barely passing.”

“I know you will. You do anything you put your mind to, really.”

The two sat quietly for a bit, simply watching the sparklers work their way down the stick. Juniper stole a couple looks at Rylan, though she was sure they weren’t as subtle as she was trying to make them. She nearly missed Rylan’s words as they spoke again.

“I don’t need much, this upcoming year.” They murmured. “The same as usual. A more successful year with my father, another good year at work.”

They turned eyes to Juniper, with a hint of a smile. A genuine smile. “Another year with you.”

Distantly, she could hear chanting in the background. Numbers, she’s sure, counting down into the new year. All she was aware of was just how close they were and how much brighter Rylan’s eyes seemed in the dying sparkler’s light. “I want another year with you too.”

Rylan cups her face, gently, looking straight into her eyes. She wasn’t sure who leaned in first, only how time seemed to stand still for just a second as she closed her eyes.

The fireworks went off a little early behind them--must have hit one a little faster than expected--but it was all mere background as they finally met in the middle for a gentle kiss.

When she pulls back, Rylan’s smiling, a real, full smile, and they do the same little huffs as they thumb over Juniper’s cheek. She can’t see herself, but she’s laughing and grinning so hard in giddy excitement that she could make a pretty good guess that she looks pretty happy in return.

For just a moment, everything that’s ending and everything new that’s beginning, all the stuff that will happen after the party and going back to uni and work--all doesn’t matter. All that’s left is the now, with the excitement and returned feelings of the railings of the terrace.

[alexteltevskiy]

Why I take photos

Hey everyone, how’s it going?

I’m back. Been taking a break from social media this past year. Recently moved to SoCal from Chicago and was busy settling in. Also, I took this time to step back and look at where I’ve been and where I want to go with my photography, as well as how I present it online.

I’ve got a lot of fun new content planned and will slowly start rolling it out. Meanwhile, to make up for my lack of updates, this post is chock-full of awesome photos and interesting thoughts on photography. Climb aboard and enjoy the ride!

Throughout this past year I continued taking photos, but I left social media entirely, feeling that it was becoming a bit too much. Too much of a time investment and mental drain, researching & following, using all those silly hash tags… Too much attention being eaten up by a constant bombardment with a never-ending flow of imagery. Too much bots, too much spam & too much noise. Too much “for the likes”. Too much stuff I couldn’t care to care about anymore. Instant gratification and desensitization were the new norm. Even the quality stuff didn’t matter anymore. I knew it was time to jump ship.

But I did miss the things that were actually good about it. There weren’t that many, but still… I knew that it was only a matter of time before I plugged back in again. And… here I am. Meanwhile, my sabbatical allowed me the luxury to think about my photography from the ground up, and think I did. In this post I’d like to share with you some of the fruits of all that thinking: I’d like to share with you the 10 reasons why I take photos.

1. Exploration & adventure

Photography allows me to explore new, unfamiliar places, as well as see the old and familiar places in new light, over and over again. Back in the olden days I used to call it a “Passport to adventure” (pardon the cheese). And I still feel that way.

Nothing else gets me out the door as quickly as a camera and a fresh new roll of film, and not much enriches a life more than travel.

2. Meeting people

Meeting new people is always fun. It’s a life-enriching experience and helps one feel connected to the greater world. It’s not always easy to connect with strangers on the street, but a camera usually helps break the ice in more ways than one.

Since many of my interests lie in old mechanical objects, having a vintage camera with me actually sparks a lot of conversations to happen entirely by themselves. And at the end of the day, 9 out of 10 people actually feel honored to be able to tell their story and have their picture taken.

3. Family and friends

I don’t need 691 snapshots of what we ate for breakfast every year. I need just a few quality photos that are engineered to stand the test of time and will always bring back the fondest of memories spent with my family and friends.

Quality photography, where I put in the time and effort to make each shot count (ahem, film, not pointing fingers, ahem). It’s rewarding and it makes my relationships feel that much more special (sorry for the sentimental cheese).

4. Recording milestones

Speaking of family and friends, the moments that we cherish most are the ones that deserve their own dedicated photo shoot. Being a photographer transcends into being a historian and keeper of family history and even tradition.

“Production values” are high, trips are planned, adventures are had and lasting memories are made. Photos serve as testament to us and the big advancements in our lives - a big move, getting married, having children…

5. Fueling curiosity

To be curious is to be human. It’s what defines us as a race that’s able to advance and grow. There would be no fire, no wheel, no semiconductor and no landing on the moon and (gasp) no Instagram.

Taking photos for me is a continuation of that fine tradition of discovery. I see, I like, I take a photo. I obsess over the photo and object that lies herein. I learn more about it, wiki-ing about the design decisions on that olive green ’67 Cutlass or the impact of that historic Main St. movie theater on the town or how surfboards are shaped. Or why the moon is sometimes red. Or why Dingbats have such a funny name.

Photography helps me learn more about my world. Always a nice thing.

6. Imagination exercise

Every once in a while I’d take a photo and it would entertain my mind in many not-so-obvious ways. Could happen with a picture perfect landscape or a failed Holga long exposure. It would mysteriously linger in memory for a while, prompting repeat viewing. Often times the effect would be immediately after seeing the photo, other times it would surface years after the fact.

I would be drawn to the photo, get lost in it, imagine myself in it. All sorts of metaphorical thought would crawl into the picture, all sorts of things would form in the shadows and bubble up. Sometimes nostalgia would paint the skies a dull yellow and I’d feel warmth in my toes that I haven’t felt since 17. Sometimes at night, the skyline of Port of LA turns into Port Town from F-Zero and at midday, the sand dunes on the beach turn into a romanticized version of early 20th-century Arabia.

Humans are visual creatures, and photos have the power to play all sorts of tricks on the interplay between imagination, memory and all the 5 senses. Photos help me tie my mindscape together.

7. Giving back

It’s only natural to want to share with the world something that you truly, honestly love!

Photography is a craft that has lots to do with understanding fundamentals, repetition and learning from your mistakes. It also has lots to do with many other things that are not so immediately obvious due to the exceedingly esoteric nature of what makes or breaks a good photo. Not to mention that there’s a very complicated technical side to photography as well, film or digital...

The answers to all of these come with time and experience, and as always, with a little help from our friends. As such, it’s always a humbling and enjoyable experience when I can offer my friends a little help of my own, based on my personal experience and observations.

8. Experimentation and happenstance

Photography has always been about experimenting - seeing what works and what doesn’t. Every time I try something new I am faced with fresh and, dare I say, invigorating challenges.

Sometimes I learn something cool that I’d like to continue doing (redscale or Pen-o-ramas). Other times I find a format that completely changes the kinds of shots I’d do for long stretches of time (half frame or a 6x9). Or I would find a camera so unpredictable that I wouldn’t know how the shot will turn out at all (pinholes, Holgas, solarcams, old soviet cameras, etc).

In the world of film photography, there is absolutely no shortage of film, formats, cameras and techniques to try out. We have, after all, more than a hundred years of photographic legacy to fall back on and tinker with. It keeps things interesting and the perspective - fresh.

9. Getting lost in the moment

This is a big one, especially with film photography. A craft so diverse and expansive that condenses down to a singular moment when the shutter goes off. There’s so much to love, so many details to enjoy.

Starting with the obvious - not having to chimp or preview the photos and being limited by a scarce, diminishing resource (film) allows more time to bask in the surroundings and bond with the moment rather than just keep popping off the camera like a machine gun. Waiting for the moment (or setting up the shot), anticipating the scene, watching it all come together. It’s meditation.

The gear, so varied and spanning such a breadth of generations, each with its own intricacies, procedures and character. The mechanical, tangible nature of control manipulations. It’s all very tactile and ASMR-ish. Come on, all you Leica fans out there - tell me you don’t go through an elation every time that cloth goes sssssshwick, haha )

10. Feeling the passing of time

Photos are like a quality wine - they get better with age (I actually don’t know if that’s true, but that’s how the saying goes). A lot of photos we admire today were received completely different when they were first presented to the world. We look back at the photos from the 60’s, 70’s and go through a portal to that time. How people lived their lives, where they lived, what they drove, how they had fun. It’s all put through the context of history. Same goes for movies, music - any cultural item.

It’s important to understand that your photos, if you choose to keep them around for that long, will be viewed many decades down the line and will offer a glimpse into those times. Viewers from the future will look at the cars and marvel at how people got around in these dead-dinosaur-powered vehicles, or how everyone on the street was stuck staring down at tiny glass screens, or even the fact that the very photo they’re looking at is static, isn’t an immersive 3D experience and has limited resolution.

Things get especially interesting when the photographer himself is the subject of the photos...

11. Cars

Wait, didn’t I say it was 10 reasons? Well, there’s always room for cars! Awesome, timeless automotive examples, each with its own personality and style. As they say, there’s always room for cars...

Conclusion

Sorry if that was too wordy! A lot of reasons, huh? And everybody will have their own… That’s the beauty of this thing called photography - everyone makes it their own. Hopefully this post presented you with some interesting food for thought, or maybe inspiration for your next photo project. Thanks for reading, everyone.

Stay awesome!

[fox-household]

Special Chapter 1: Resolutions of the New Year Variety.

Alright here it is, the one I’ve been talking about and goodness me, it’s massive, it might be the longest chapter I’ve written so far except for Act 1, Ch 2. Anyway I actually had ideas to do this since back in early September or maybe late August? Either way listening to a certain song or two with a picture in my mind allowed me to create this as an idea and because of this inspiration, I chose to do this instead of other things like a proper Christmas chapter, so hope it’s worth it? Now just enjoy them being pretty chill I guess. Happy New Year everyone, hope you all have a good one. 

The blue sweater wearing skeleton gave an exasperated sigh, ‘’Why can’t you just stop being so difficult? It’s going to be lots of fun, trust me’’. The spider watched Sci’s pleading smile with a look of pure annoyance and doubt, ‘’No, I sincerely wish no part of this silly farce that you call a celebration, who gives a damn if it’s a new year, it doesn’t mean anything. There is way, way more important things that can be done this night instead of what you plan.’’ She took an aggressive step towards Sci while crossing her arms, ‘’From what I can tell your plan includes, filthy dirt, cold biting wind and the only pay off will be some stupid explosives being chucked at the sky in a pointless fashion to give some dumb amusement when the money wasted on it could be well invested in something much more beneficial… you got any good reason in that skull that I should come along with this group of ours?’’ Sci furrowed his non-existent brow, ‘’Well when you put it like that, then it’s going to be quite tough… hmmm food will be there, as well as good company?’’ Unsurprisingly she looked unimpressed, ‘’All things I can get without going outside and that’s my final verdict.’’ Sci scratched the back of his head with a slight smile, a slight hint of amusment in his expression, ‘’Your final verdict? There’s no way you would change your mind? Anything I can do?’’ ‘’Give it up right now friend, stop wasting your time and leave if that’s all you’re here for.’’ Muffet shot a web from her wrist at the door handle behind Sci and with a twist and pull, the door opened, signalling the exit. Trying to ignore the questionable physics of the action, Sci started to head out the door, ‘’Well that’s a real shame, guess we’ll have to go without you, well I sincerely hope you have a good night’’ The last thing that the skeleton heard as he closed the door behind him was, ‘’Whatever, you too I guess’’. Sci let out a deep breath and headed into the next room with a mischievous grin on his face, rubbing his hands together, he sense of purpose as he went on his way. Leaning on a wall in the adjacent hall was Clover, as he approached she stopped scrolling on her phone, putting it in her right pocket as she stood up.  The way she had full attention on him made it obvious that had been waiting there for him, but Sci already knew that. ‘’How did it go Mr Minister, was it a success?’’ The monster sighed and shook his head, putting both of his arms behind his back in a dramatic fashion. ‘’No Private, unfortunately this operation will be marked down as an extreme failure, no recovery was possible for anyone, you know what this means right?’’ Clover stifled a laugh and failed to hide her own grin, her voice also betraying her as it was filled with amusement despite the mock horror she was attempting to do. ‘’My god, no, you can’t actually be talking about… using that can you?’’ Sci pulled down the brim of an imaginary cliché military general’s hat. ‘’I’m afraid so Private, it appears we have no choice but to use our weapon of mass destruction, to think we would be brought to use such desperate measures, I’ll feel sorry for our enemy once it’s over, nobody deserves to come face to face with such an almighty force’’.

‘’Hey Miss? Am I allowed to come in?’’, Asgore opened the door slightly and poked his head in. Muffet found some minor relief in that it was a fluffy head showing and not a skull coming through, ‘’Yes you can come in, but close the door behind you’’. The goat child didn’t really need to be told that, the drill was always the same. With a smile he walked in and did as he was told, walking through the sunless room over to Muffet, she was now just sitting at her mirror doing some sort of make up with a powder, things that he imagined would forever elude him. Knowing that the spider was waiting for him to explain his visit, he didn’t waste time before speaking, ‘’So ummm, I heard you weren’t coming with us for our New Year’s celebration, why’s that?’’ There was a groan, of course it was about that, why couldn’t these guys just leave her alone with this type of thing. ‘’Because it’s a waste of time, I mean if you want to celebrate, you can just do it in the comfort of your own abode.’’ ‘’But doesn’t it get boring staying at home all the time?’’ ‘’You should never complain about comfort dearie, you never know when it could be taken away from you’’. Asgore started to give a little bit of an annoyed pout as he walked over and sat on her bed, watching Muffet finish her make up and stand up, turning to now have all her eyes on the goat. ‘’Isn’t it good to have some form of variety… and fresh air?’’ ‘’Then I’ll open a window, might be nice to get a light breeze through. Variety is good when you’re bored, but child, I have yet to get bored.’’ ‘���We’ll bring some alcohol, you like that stuff.’’ The spider let out a loud, irritated groan, ‘’Stop listing things that I can do here, you’re trying my patience… if you don’t have anything else, leave or my children will come for you tonight’’. Asgore took a deep breath, a determined expression becoming dominant, despite her threats he wasn’t going to back down, she hated it when he got like that, why couldn’t just submit like a normal person. ‘’Well fine then. But we both know that I can promise you it’s going to be a good time, an even better time when you’re around’’. ‘’You bloody well can’t, don’t try that poppycock with me’’, her sneer towards him increased, but as expected it had no effect. ‘’We’ve been through this a bunch of times Muffet, every single time I’ve pulled through. You’ve always admitted to me that you’re glad you came to whatever event we ended up planning, it’s a song and dance that happens every time and ends the same… and uh well, it just feels like there’s a big part missing when you aren’t there, like we’re nowhere near complete without you, I really like it when you come’’. Muffet remained silent, still watching the boy’s face, an honest smile that didn’t appear to be holding any sort of deceit, the way his eyes went big as he talked about what he was feeling, it made her… ‘’Please, please, please? C’mon, please Muffet, just for tonight?’’ ‘’….Fine’’ ‘’Pardon?’’ The spider sounded like he had to force her words out with a groan, ‘’Fine, I’ll go alright? Just don’t make a big deal about it… and don’t hug me or I take it back’’. Asgore grinned excitedly, ‘’Yay, thank you so much, it’ll be the best, I promise. Also, don’t worry, I know the drill. Would you like me to let you get ready?’’ ‘’Yes please, I would like a little alone time before our outdoor venture’’. With a positive spring in his step he jumped off the bed and left the room quickly, although being extra careful not to slam the door behind him in case of invoking her wrath.

Alphys put down very cliché looking picnic basket and folded up chequered rug onto the grass, looking out over the view given to them by a green, grassy hill that was on the outskirts of the town which could still be seen in the distance. She took in one deep breath and let it out with a newfound feeling of relaxation, a feeling she wish she was more familiar with. ‘’S-so uh, wh-where d-did you guys find th-this place? Seems quite um o-out there?’’ Clover had been following just behind Alphys, being the guide of the duo, she started to unroll the rug. ‘’A school camp we went on around here, had some free time so a small group of us just decided to uh… wander off a little bit and we found this over the town look out thing. Remembered it Boxing Day and figured it ain’t to bad of a viewing spot for the show’’. She decided to ignore the blatant irresponsibility of the start of that statement and focus on the positives, ‘’And y-you’re sure th-that we’re g-going to be able t-to see the f-fireworks from h-here?’’ ‘’Don’t you stress, I assure you that we’ll have a perfect view, they fire off around this side of town. Don’t you trust us Al?’’ ‘’N-no, I t-trust y-you, I j-just wanted to ch-check that’s all. I b-believe you’ve done w-well… any i-idea how l-long the o-others are g-going to be?’’ Clover shrugged, ‘’Dunno, possibly another twenty minutes, Sci and Asgore just had to do something back home and then they planned on buying some other stuff possibly, I’m assuming they’ll be done soon.’’ Alphys nodded and smiled, sitting down on the rug that Clover had finished setting up, ‘’I w-was r-really surprised th-that this was y-your idea, Asgore or Sci would be understandable, b-but you? Is th-there a r-reason why?’’ Clover crossed her arms with a mildly annoyed look, ‘’What do ya mean why? Can’t I contribute or something? What’s the issue?’’ The lizard monster shook her head in a slight panic at the accusing tone the human was giving, ‘’N-n-no there’s n-no issue, j-just you’ve n-never really g-given s-suggestions l-like this… didn’t th-think it was your th-thing y-you know? Y-you don’t h-have tell me o-or anything l-like that’’. The cowgirl let out an almost inaudible laugh and uncrossed her arms, giving a smile that wasn’t exactly happy, some hesitance showing up in her voice, ‘’It’s fine Al, just… this was something I used to do on New Years Eve, before Mt Ebott, back when I was with…’’, she sighed and pulled the brim her hat up, looking at the cloudy sky, the yellows and oranges of dusk starting to take form although it would still be a while before night actually fell. ‘’… back then we just used to hang out and stay up until midnight out on the grass like this and we’d eat food, talk to each other and just… I-I guess just umm enjoy the night air, to celebrate another year alive and well, I just wanted to…’’, she stopped and appeared to be trying to form her thoughts and perhaps just regain her composure, Alphys could swear she looked down to hide her eyes for the moments of silence. ‘’It just means a lot to me and before I’ve always done it all by myself and well umm… I just really uh… I really wanted to share this with you all, I guess.’’ The monster could tell the difficulty of every word at the end, honestly it surprised her that she was telling her any of this in the first place. The amount of effort put into that answer couldn’t put anything other than a kind, heart warmed smile. ‘’Clover… I know th-that we all a-appreciate you sharing th-that, I think i-it’s a good idea.’’ While Clover started looking a little embarrassed, yet she still allowed herself hopeful smile, ‘’You really think so? Cause I mean, I’m sure you ain’t don’t any of that emotional crap for a simple celebration, don’t worry ‘bout it.’’ Alphys shook her head, ‘’No, I th-think it’s w-wonderful y-you know? I th-think it's g-great that y-you have something sp-special like that… I j-just hope we d-don’t disappoint y-you or r-ruin your e-expectations’’. The human walked over to the monster and sat down next to her, the both of them watching the town in the distance and all the nature in between them, taking in the calm and relaxing atmosphere, ‘’Don’t worry about a thing, I’m sure everything will be good, you guys don’t disappoint’’.

It was an uneventful hour later before the other three arrived, arriving with another bag of supplies and Muffet who was carrying one bottle of liquor in each hand, it wasn’t certain how much she was planning on sharing. It wasn’t very long of waiting and setting up some of the biscuits and dip out before the kids got restless and started fighting a little bit further down the hill, some flashes of yellow and sounds of metal could be heard as bullets went flying and a trident kept trying to make contact. ‘’S-so uh Muffet, why d-did you decide t-to come down here in th-the end? I r-remember you saying that y-you weren’t going to b-be here.’’ The sudden question made Muffet look over with an expression of dismissal, ‘’I just chose of my very own accord that I shall be present at this event, does there need to be any other reason?’’ Sci gave Alphys a wink, ‘’Oh ho ho, I think I know the reason’’, his gaze turned to Muffet, his familiar mischievous grin returning to him, ‘’I reckon someone else convinced her’’. The spider growled, returning the skeleton’s gaze with her very own glare, ‘’You think you’re so damn clever don’t you? But I’ll have you know, he doesn’t have anything to do with it, I assure you, he never has and never will, every action I take is from my own free will’’. ‘’Oh, you don’t think so? You wouldn’t be lying would you?’’ Despite all the hints and suggestions Sci was making and the blunder Muffet had made, Alphys just looked confused, ‘’W-wait whose him? Y-you d-don’t have a g-guy in y-your life n-now d-do you?’’ ‘’What?! NO!’’ The female scientist seemed be slowly losing herself in her imagination, a dreamy smile appearing on her face to match her state. ‘’A g-guy who h-has made it h-his quest to b-break through y-your barriers and th-then while you’ll hate him at f-first, s-soon you’ll realise you’re falling f-for this idealistic man, s-someone who can sh-show you th-the light in y-your p-pessimistic w-world view’’. ‘’I swear to fucking god Alphys, if you don’t get those shipping ideas out of your head right now, I’m going to end your miserable existence!’’ Fury was written all over her eyes and face as she stared at Alphys with burning rage, which in response elicited a slightly nervous and possibly frightened laugh. ‘’Ummm Ch-charles?’’ ‘’If you’re seriously thinking that the me and Charles are together, then I think that you won’t be seeing next year… you want this to be your final resting place?’’ ‘’Oh g-osh, n-n-no, no, no, no, n-no p-please d-don’t…’’, her panic rose in a large jolt as slowly she could seen a small shine of a sharp, well-polished metal sliding out of the countess’ sleeve and into view, even Sci was starting to adopt a nervous smile as he watched the conversation unfold. ‘’… I j-just m-meant th-that maybe h-he was th-the one th-that convinced you, th-that’s all I swear… j-just d-don’t d-do anything please.’’ Muffet’s unfiltered rage was apparent as she looked over Alphys’ expression as she panicked about, looking for any sign the she may be lying, any shred of deceit in her movements and any excuse to cut her down, but the only thing she could comprehend was the face of a scared, foolish but honest girl. With a slight move of her arm, the blade slid back into her sleeve for no perceivable, physical reason. Instead now picking up a bottle of wine and opening it. ‘’I’m already regretting my decision to come here, you fools aren’t allowed this bottle anymore’’. She said right before taking a large gulp from the bottle itself. Alphys was now just trying to calm herself down, feeling as if though she had just barely survived that conversation with her life, struggling to slow down her breathing. After about another half a minute of waiting, she spoke up. ‘’Uh b-but Sci, w-were you t-trying to s-suggest something b-before wh-why did sh-‘’. ‘’I think it’s best if we leave it at that alright Al?’’, Sci shook his head, both giving a glance to Muffet who was shooting razor sharp daggers with her eyes. ‘’Y-yeah, I guess y-you might b-be right.’’

Three streaks of yellow flew past the goat’s head as he sidestepped to the right, watching the barrel of the opponent’s gun to determine where to dodge. Bringing his trident back behind him, wasted no time after the dodge to close the distance on Clover, swiping with it left and then right, although only managing to tug at her clothes as she nimbly dodged his attacks, his trident only finding air to his immense annoyance. With a large grin, Asgore brought the trident above his head, feeling its weight before preparing to bring it down. Unfortunately for him, Clover found an opening, punishing him for his greedy extra attack, she quickly lifted the gun up to his face, sticking the barrel right on his nose and Asgore’s expression faltered as he could only watch as the gun quickly glowed yellow. The last thing the goat saw was the human’s own cocky grin and then suddenly his world flashed yellow along with the feeling of getting hit by a car. It took a good extra ten seconds before Asgore managed to feel like he could even move, the sky filling in the yellow sheet that had been his eyesight only moments previous. He tried to sit up but suddenly found a large weight on his chest, looking up to find Clover with one boot on him to pin him, watching her familiar victorious smile as she spun her gun around her finger. ‘’You alright there pardner? Couldn’t help but notice that you’ve seemed to have been caught in an accident of some kind’’, the gloating in her tone was clear as usual, always having to rub it in just a little bit, even if it was all fun and games. She lifted her foot off the goat and offered him help. The prince let out a sigh and then a chuckle as he took her hand, letting her assist him as he got off the ground, ‘’Yeah, I wonder how that happened, you wouldn’t happen to know anything about that would you?’’ ‘’I mean, I have heard my great humour, general charm and excellent wit has blown people away before, but I never realised my personality was so good it could do it to people literally’’ In his eyes, there was only one correct response to Clover’s rubbish more than the eye roll he’d given her. ‘’Ugh just shut up’’. ‘’Well that’s just mighty rude to be towards someone who helped you from a fall, maybe next time I’ll just have to leave you in the dust… like I do with everything else we compete on… Ow, you little shit.’’ Clover rubbed her arm after taking a whack from a trident, Asgore shrugged, ‘’Sorry, I couldn’t help myself, sometimes I feel like the only way to get some sense into you is to smack it in’’. The human grumbled a little as she gave a, admittedly weaker, punch to the other’s arm. ‘’Whatever, I’ll leave you in your denial’’ He found temptation to hit her again, but decided that was enough for now, plus he wanted to ask her a different question, ‘’So uh how’re you feeling?’’ ‘’Pretty good honestly, the swift winds of victory-‘’ ‘’No not that, about today and this whole thing?’’ Her smile fell a little, ‘’Oh, that… fine I think, it’s going to be good… I um told Alphys about the reason and all that, that was interesting I guess’’. Asgore smiled, noticing a form of uncertainty in her that he felt was his duty to dismantle. ‘’Well I think that’s good, nothing wrong with opening up to others a little more. Honestly I think it’s been quite brave of you to not only suggest this but also tell Al all that.’’ Clover shrugged and shook her head, ‘’Don’t give me all that complimenting crap, we both know this what you wanted, your suggestion and all that, maybe I should ask if this is what you wanted’’. He crossed his arms, his smile not leaving him despite the accusation, a small laugh leaving his lips that showed the only thing on his mind was positivity, ‘’I didn’t make this happen, I just thought that maybe it would be a fun time for the group and you’d maybe get to relive some of those memories you had back in the day. Sure, I gave you a slight push, but you wouldn’t have done it if you didn’t want it.’’ ‘’I mean, I guess you’re right, though still, stop calling me brave like you’re an adult talking to a kid or whatever, it’s fucking weird man.’’ ‘’Awww, but my Clover is just growing up so fast’’. Asgore managed to get a giggle out before he went wide eyed as around 10+ yellow bullets started floating up above Clover, barely a moment passed before they were pelted at him painfully, all of them disappearing in a small puff as they made contact. ‘’Aggh… heh ok yeah I guess I deserved that one’’ The Cowgirl’s annoyed expression turned to an amused one once her barrage was over, ‘’Really, what tipped you off?’’ ‘’Heh sorry… how about we head back to the others, I’m sure they’re just dying to see us’’. The goat turned to start doing just as he said when a small call out of his name made him turn his head to look back at Clover. ‘’Hey Asgore… thanks… for helping.’’, her words were quiet and soft as she watched him, her eyes only being barely visible beneath her hat. He responded with a shrug, ‘’Don’t mention it, what are friends for?’’ He waved his arm in a beckoning motion, ‘’Well come on, how about focus on some more positive stuff.’’ The five were sat down together having just eaten food, some candles were lit as night had fallen and midnight was approaching. After several discussions there fell a silence among the group and a certain kid decided that it was the perfect time to but in with his own proposition. ‘’Hey, have you all thought about what your new years resolutions are going to be? Got any planned changes you want to make for the coming year?’’ The silence and uncertainty among them put a slight dent in Asgore’s confidence, ‘’Really, none of you have?’’ ‘’Heh what about you kid? Can’t have bone to pick with us if you haven’t done anything yourself’’. ‘’Oh well of course I have, I simply have a resolution to keep on moving forwards and taking on every challenge that comes my way… guys what’s the matter? Why the look?’’ The other four had an almost scary synchronised look that conveyed their unimpressed feelings, Asgore could almost feel some cold sweat dropping down his head from just looking at them all. ‘’Uh A-Asgore, I’m n-not sure how to p-put this but umm… well…’’ ‘’It’s not a resolution at all dearie’’ Muffet’s pleasant tone with obvious venomous intent struck the goat with a confused tilt of the head, ‘’You really don’t think so? What’s the problem?’’ Clover sighed, ‘’To put it in a more kind way, what you just said isn’t a resolution because that’s just you anyway, that’s just normal passive Asgore, you need to give us some way you can change… also what you said was super damn vague, how the hell are we meant to measure that as a success or failure?’’ Sci watched the sky for a few moments as he pondered the different thoughts spinning around his head, soon enough he looked at Asgore, a small smile lighting up his skeletal features, ‘’I think maybe we should all just share a small thing we’re going to do differently, an actual goal, like for example me…’’, he paused as he brought his hand to his mouth in what appeared to be a thinking position, trying to think quickly of what he would do. ‘’I guess a part of me would probably think that… cutting down on work hours just a little bit could do me good, also leave the house just a bit outside of work, maybe something like one of those camping trips you keep talking about Asgore, I think I just probably need to get away from technology and society for a bit… my resolution will be to try and dedicate less of my life to work and more to just living I guess, is that ok?’’ The other scientist of the group nodded, returning a smile to the skeleton, ‘’I-I think th-that’s perfect Sci… th-though I d-doubt I could c-come up with anything l-like yours though.’’ ‘’Phew, was a little worried it was going to fall flat, but none of you have to come up with anything like that, just something small will suffice, who wants to go next? I’m sure someone has something’’. He couldn’t help but feel surprise at hearing someone step up so readily as he did expect at least a few moments of silence, but the spider’s throat clearing noise brought everyone to attention. ‘’Well I’m going to go now just to avoid the nagging and get this painful ordeal over and done with.’’ Muffet took a big gulp of her glass of wine that had been brought before explaining, ‘’Under the assumption that I’ll be attacked for saying something like maximising my profit margins or whatever other lingo I come up with, I suppose I’ll do something you call more… reasonable… like being more sociable? Is that what you want?’’ Clover quickly darted in with the questions, ‘’How do you plan on doing that? What actions do you plan to take?’’ A slight groan came before her next words, ‘’Well dearie, if you really must know, I’ll just join a Chess Club or something, that way I’ll get to talk to new people while at the same time I won’t have to team up with anyone, I can spend my attention on utterly destroying my enemies… does that please your inquiry little cowgirl?’’ The spite in her words and the condescending tone made the human really want to the throttle the spider, shooting her own glare at the other’s eyes, ‘’Yeah I guess that’ll do just fine, pompous lit-‘’ ‘’Uh h-how about w-we move on now?’’, a nervous small voice was the surprising factor that suddenly ended the fight for the time being, Alphys now looking uncertain as all gazes turned to her. ‘’Oh umm, I-I guess it’s m-my turn ummm… let me th-think.’’ The others watched the lizard mumble to herself as she tried to consider what she could do, but nothing she felt was super meaningful came to her head, just minor things, guess that’ll have to do. ‘’Umm w-well, it’s a little cliché and it’s probably uh not that s-significant to you guys, but uh maybe I c-could go to the gym or s-something? Since I sit d-down all the d-day and don’t r-really do anything at home and at w-work so I’m umm… I… guess I c-could probably lose a l-little weight maybe? Even if not th-that, it’s healthy to g-get exercise so starting once a w-week, I’ll go to the g-gym, maybe go for a walk o-or jog on o-other days too.’’ The first response she heard (which made her worry that she wasn’t being taken all that seriously) was loud laugh from Asgore who had the biggest grin on his face, ‘’Oh my goodness, that’s an amazing idea, I mean won’t it be like training those anime protagonists do for some great battle?’’ Some form of relief washed over her face and all worry was replaced with a nervous smile, closing her eyes as she scratched the back of her head, ‘’I m-mean, I guess th-that’s true… th-though I want to sign to the gym, not a g-great battle’’. ‘’Heh, well I think I might join you on some of those runs and stuff, I always feel doing something with someone else helps you stay on track, plus it makes things much less boring. Oh uh only if you want to of course, if you don’t want me to just let me know.’’ ‘’O-oh no, no, no, th-that’s perfectly fine Asgore, I um th-think I would g-greatly appreciate that, th-thank you.’’ Alphys’ expression became much calmer as she offered the kid her hand, him shaking it without any sort of hesitation. ‘’Alright now, I’m going next and you ain’t saying shit about it.’’ Clover crossed her arms, ‘’My resolution will be to start getting some cash.’’ ‘’Don’t give us that bullshit, I’m not allowed to say money how come you can’’. ‘’Because my dear spider, it’s all about fucking context, something I thought you’d be able to see with all those eyes of yours’’ Sci decided now was probably the time to bring in the voice of reason, ‘’Alright now, how about you tell us your plan.’’ The human let out a deep breath and went on to her explanation, ‘’Well since I’m getting to that sort of age, I figure that maybe I could get a job and start saving for some important stuff, like something to do after school and on weekends. A simple but effective resolution, will that suffice for my part of all this?’’ ‘’Yeah kid, I think that’s fine’’. The attention of the group now turned to Asgore, the prince was now thinking as he looked at the ground, as he tried to figure where he stood in this situation. ‘’All of you came up with positive changes you could make, but… I’m not exactly sure what I want to change, at least not right now.’’ He felt worry as nothing just popped into his head that he could tell the others. That was until his face changed to one that expressed realisation and a small smile appeared. ‘’Well I think, even if it isn’t necessarily something that’ll help me or change me, but I think that I want to get involved in some outside of school activities, maybe like charity work or something? Hey Muffet, you think Mary would like some help with the stuff she does?’’ Muffet rolled her eyes before giving the goat a confirming nod, ‘’Yes I’m sure she would love your help, especially from you, she’d probably adopt you kids on the spot if she could… she thinks you’re that cute… bloody weird honestly’’. Asgore played with some of the fur on his ear, ‘’Well with great fluff like this, it’s no wonder I charm everyone around me… but anyways, I think my New Years Resolution will be to help others, if I’ve yet to think of someway to improve myself, I’ll just improve everybody else’s day just a bit more, so I’ll help with charity work on weekends and stuff and generally when I’m available, I’m going to make that my new vow. Will you all allow me to use that as my resolution?’’ The rest of them thought for a few small moments before nodding or smiling, different signs of acceptance that gave the kid a little spark of hope that he’d needed to repair his hurt confidence. Muffet allowed herself a small smile as she took another sip of her drink, ‘’Well I personally think that’s… reasonable.’’ ‘’Y-yeah th-that sounds g-good. That’s e-everyone r-right? We all h-happy with th-that?’’, the nervous voice softly squeaked as the smaller scientist looked around at everyone. The skeleton let out a small chuckle to go along with his calm, lazy grin, ‘’Yeah I think that does it, sharing time is over I guess. Went a little better than expected honestly’’. Then finally, as if to complete the set, Clover piped in with a large sigh of relief, ‘’Oh thank god, can we please move on from this touchy feely stuff, I feel like I’ve hit my limit with it all, how about we move onto the cool, exciting stuff.’’

‘’Alrighty pardners, 20 seconds left, we’ve almost survived, just a little longer!’’, Clover yelled out as she held a phone out in front of her, watching the time tick down. ‘’It’s g-going to b-be coming from o-over there isn’t it? We’re going to b-be able to see it?’’ Alphys’ worry came through her voice as she looked around at the others who were gazing around the sky in the direction of the distant town downhill. ‘’Have no fear, I swear it on my honour that we’re going to be in the perfect position, have a little faith, ‘’Asgore exclaimed loudly! ‘’The kids won’t let us down, it’ll be fine’’. Sci calmly spoke. ‘10’ ‘9’ ‘8’ ‘7’ ‘6’ ‘’Ain’t no better way to end it but with a bang’’ ‘3’ ‘2’ ‘1’ ‘’HAPPY NEW YEAR’’ Finally with that yell, the sky was suddenly filled with bangs and colour as the fireworks in the distance were set off. An unbelievable amount of colours were used, starting off with Red and Green to then Blue and Yellow, mixing them all up in different patterns at a fast pace, one exploding after another to make sure your eyes didn’t find a lull in the light show. Purple and Orange were added to the list along with different shades of the previous colours to just add that bit more variety. The sky was the canvas and it was being painted on with brilliant lights and patterns, the fireworks bright enough to light up the around the observers in all the different colours. As it came near the end, Pink and White were added to the mix and the fireworks were starting to go off incredibly fast, a machine gun of these flammable rockets as if somebody had told them that it was ending and that they needed to fire off every single one they had right at this moment. One and then another, right with another one, Pink, Green, Red, Blue, Purple, Orange and then White before finally the sky returned fully to a Dark Blue and the sounds of the night returned to silence. ‘’I say that we toast for another great year for us all, one that will allow us to have plenty of opportunities to be the people we want to be’’. Asgore cheered out as he raised his cup. ‘’Puhuhuh~ I suppose that’s something I can raise a glass too’’, Muffet smiled as she raised her glass up. ‘’Heh not bad kid, I reckon we can make this the best year we’ve had if we try.’’ Sci looked at his empty glass and considered filling it before deciding not to both and raising it up. ‘’Yeah alright, ain’t that bad, just want to make sure this year doesn’t get boring, let’s make this the most interesting of years’’. Clover chuckled and grinned before finally joining the others with her cup. ‘’W-well, I h-have no idea wh-what I exactly w-want from the New Year, but I’m s-sure there’ll be ch-challenges and t-times where it’s tough, but I-I th-think that together, n-no matter what, we’ll be able t-to get through it… so h-here’s to being able to s-stick together for the good and th-the bad of the New Year.’’ After having spent the last little bit tapping her glass nervously, she finally raised it up. ‘’Well that wraps it all up, Happy New Year everyone, to having the best year ever.’’ Finally, with that they all drank whatever was left in their cup, unless you were Sci who just awkwardly looked at his own empty container, all of them finding solace in the night and company of the others.

‘’O-oh, Grillby’s sent a m-message for us all…’’, Alphys looked down at her phone as she walked, the group heading back to the cars with everything that they brought. ‘’So, what does it say?’’, the goat child questioned instantly. ‘’I-it says… ‘Happy New Year everyone, may all your dreams come true’… so I texted back, ‘Happy New Year, may your good times and happiness be plentiful’… s-sorry, I was j-just trying to m-match his uh positive tone’’ ‘’No Al that’s perfect, sounds real good’’ ‘’Oh dear, it appears I have messages on my side too’’, Muffet sighed as she looked over her phone with the purple, spider phone case, ‘’one from Charles saying, ‘wish you Madam an excellent and profitable New Year, also send best wishes to your associates over there’ and one from… Mary, ‘’Awww another great year darls, hope you’re all having the greatest night, wish you all the best and hope you all have a fabulous year. From Aunt Mary’… then she puts down an incredibly disgusting amount of heart emojis and peace signs.’’ Asgore couldn’t help but giggle loudly, ‘’Well make sure to send Aunt Mary something back’’. ‘’Huff… Ok fine, but only because you asked so nicely…, ‘’Thanks, hope you had a pretty good night yourself, hopefully maybe even your year won’t be to far from good yourself’’… I’ll send something similar to Charles’’. ‘’Hey, my bro has something to share…’’, Sci chuckled before reading it out, ‘’TO ALL YOU MONSTERS AND HUMAN OUT THERE, THE GREAT PAPYRUS HAS DECIDED THAT YOU ALL RIGHTLY DESERVE JUST THE COOLEST NEW YEARS FROM ME, BUT NOT ONLY THAT BUT YOU GUYS TRULY DESERVE HAVING ONE ABSOLUTELY AWESOME YEAR. SORRY YOU COULDN’T IMPROVE YOUR TIME WITH MY NEW YEARS SPAHGETTI, BUT MAYBE NEXT TIME. HAVE THE GREATEST TIME AND BEST WISHES FROM THE OTHER SKELEBRO’,… wow, isn’t he just the best?’’ The skeleton didn’t need anything said to already get on his response. ‘’Thanks bro, definitely the coolest best wishes we’ve received so far. Everyone wishes you to have coolest year right back at you…. Also everyone is very upset they couldn’t have your spaghetti’’. It was only seconds that Paps sent a picture of his spaghetti and a apologetic message sounding legitimately bad for them. ‘’Oh hey I actually got one, it’s from the kids, ‘Hey Gorey Fluffybuns we hope you’re having a good night out there and staying safe, better not be getting up to much trouble. Anyway all of us here wish you and Clover and whoever else in is around a great New Years and hope that over the course of the next year we’re all going to have more great times and memories to share. Well see you soon, lots of love…’, oh and they sent a selfie of the six of them, though they’re crowded around a sleeping Paps, guess the poor guy finally crashed.’’ ‘’Heh, maybe. Wonder how long the little guy lasted for, probably just had to hit midnight and then collapsed.’’, Clover looked over his shoulder and examined the picture. ‘’True, I imagine they had to avoid giving him any sort of candy, otherwise they probably would’ve been to busy dealing with a little monster to message us. I better write a message back… ‘Hey guys, looks like Paps was having a ball. Hope you’re all good and having a great night, wish you the best New Years, looking forward to spending another year with you all. See you soon, love you all.’… There we go. Think we’re all good now.’’   ‘’Yeah, the only thing left is to head home, getting real fucking exhausted’’, Clover yawned as she went on ahead.

Alphys found herself sitting up at the kitchen bench with only the dim light of an outside light source and the brightness of her phone. She looked up with suspicious look from her device when she heard approaching footsteps from the darkness, though relief washing over her instantly as she watched a Pyjama clad Asgore, tiredly rubbing his eyes, emerge from the shadows. ‘’Asgore? Wh-what are y-you doing up? E-everyone else h-has gone to b-bed.’’ ‘’Oh well I just wanted some water… why are you up though? I think you should try getting some sleep too.’’, he walked over to a top cupboard and grabbed a small cup and started filling it under the tap. ‘’Oh uh y-yeah, you know m-me, sleeping isn’t e-exactly my s-strong suit… plus I g-got a couple of New Year t-texts as well…’’ ‘’Oh yeah, Clover got one from Dalv and Flowey, apparently Dalv didn’t realise it was New Years and Flowey had to like convince him and he can’t exactly use a phone himself… a little funny, but they send New Year’s wishes to you guys as well… who did you get stuff for?’’ Oh th-that’s nice of them, thanks. Oh um Red’s uh… k-kinda drunk r-right now… s-sent me this p-pretty much.’’ Alphys showed the prince her phone where it showed texts from Red that started with 'JJAPPY MEW YERRS' to different incarnations of 'DNT MEAM TO' 'SHIT' and then finally '<<<3 LOL'. ‘’Huh, guess he’s definitely having fun… wonder if he’ll have any party stories to tell.’’ The lizard monster got a small grin, ‘’I w-wouldn’t count on it, m-maybe when y-you’re older… h-heard it can p-pretty wild out there.’’ Asgore would’ve given a stubborn pout if he just wasn’t to tired, ‘’Well that’s no fun… did you get one from someone else as well?’’ ‘’O-oh! Y-yeah Gaster s-sent a one liner, i-it means Happy New Year.’’ She switched which messages she was viewing on her phone and as she saw the message Gaster sent, she let out a small laugh of amusement, like it was some form of joke. She pointed the phone at the kid and all he saw was ‘w+ℓnLN | = ℓn | ap(2)H+ℓ(ar)  | +ℓnlyl’ and his face just went blank. ‘’I uh don’t really get it, is it a code?’’ ‘’S-sort of, just science stuff, g-gave Sci a r-real chuckle to, but he’s b-basically saying h-happy n-new year to you in his own unique way… j-just wish I could’ve sent something like that back though, but I’m not exactly in the r-r-right mind currently, just sent him a ‘Happy New Years Gaster, hope you have a really good one, maybe actually try to get some sleep this year’’. ‘’Oh nice, but maybe you shouldn’t be so hypocritical, after I leave can you please at least try to go to sleep?’’ Asgore’s pleading made Alphys give a sigh, ‘’Y-yeah ok, I-I’ll got to b-bed in a m-minute, I promise…’’ ‘’Well with my job done, I can finally sleep in peace, goodnight Al.’’ ‘’S-sweet dreams, s-see you t-tomorrow’’. As the goat child left, another notification appeared on her phone, one that appeared to be from Red. Reopening her messages she found a video which she quickly started while waiting a few seconds for buffering. When the video played all she really could see was this wobbly view of what was probably a party and Red in the background talking, ‘’ I ANT GOING TO TURN ON TEXT TO WHATEVER HAH NO IM DRUNK DUDE PARTY HARD LIVE- OH SHIT ITS RECORDING- HAPPY NEW YEAR’’ before the video cut off after a crashing sound and some laughter. She could only shake her head and laugh, the silly guy is going to hurt himself. Finally she texted back, ‘Happy New Year Red, hope you’re having fun out there, try to make at least mediocre decisions if not good ones. Stay safe out there, better not give me any reason to worry. Heheh but no seriously, have a good time… thanks for everything. See you later’. Finally with that out of the way she turned her phone off and wandered over to her bedroom, opening it and finding extreme comfort as she collapsed on soft sheets of her bed. Alphys turned over on her back and watched the roof and gave it a tired smile. ‘’Happy New Year everyone, let’s make this year a good one’’.

[paene-umbra]

i accidentally deleted the anon for this and i have no idea how to get it back BUT somebody asked me to answer all the questions on the ask meme

END OF THE YEAR ASKS FOR 2018:

(disclaimer: this is going to be so sappy and emotional because I did so many amazing things this past year that I am so incredibly proud of and there will definitely be too much information shared but I don’t care! I can do what I want!)

1. what is one thing you’re very proud of having done this year?

- in 2018 I am proud of cutting my father mostly out of my life. he was the source of so much pain and anxiety and trauma and cutting him out has lifted a huge weight off my shoulders and kickstarted my healing.

2. what is one thing you feel you could have done better?

- I could have done better dealing with friendships. I was so incredibly stressed out for a long time and I let my frustration bleed into my relationship to the point where being around friends and groups was too emotionally draining. I dropped a lot of friends that deserved better and in 2019 I plan on rekindling relationships and giving my friends as much love as they deserve.

3. what do you hope to do better next year?

- since it is already 2019 (whoops) I have a lot of resolutions that I am planning on implementing this year. I am going to put in more effort towards maintaining my mental health while also balancing my classes, work, and friends. I want to get close again to the people I used to be close to.

4. what was something scary you faced and overcame this year?

- in 2018 I started to address a lot of the problems that were contributing to my poor mental health. I began really looking into why I was so afraid of real emotional connection with other people and trying to understand the blockages that were holding me back from being the best version of myself. for the very first time I was able to confront the fact that I have forcing myself to suffer in silence for the sake of my appearance and reputation. for the longest time, I could not stand the possibility of anyone knowing that I was hurting so much because that would have meant admitting that I was being hurt by people who loved me, so I prioritized the way that they felt instead of myself. I tried so hard to pretend that I was stable and well-adjusted because it was easier than confronting the way I let people treat me and all of the hard work that I would have to do to try to heal from my pain. I always thought I had to hide the bad parts of me to be the perfect daughter but hiding something like mental illness doesn’t make the pain magically go away. I’m not a lesser person for being mentally ill. I deserve to be happy and to get the help that I need, and it is not my job anymore to coddle the feelings of the people who hurt me. it was terrifying to admit that I was completely broken for so many years, but I am endlessly proud of finally being able to acknowledge that and start putting myself back together.

5. what did you think would be scary and then was not?

- I thought that speaking in front of crowds was terrifying in theory but after actually having to do it several times for my job, I realized that I have important things to educate people about and that speaking in large groups is the best way to teach them, so being afraid does not help my cause.

6. do you feel like you grew in some way this year? why?

- hell yeah I grew in 2018. I grew enough to be able to put myself before others, to not be afraid of rejection, to push for better treatment, to drop those who hold me back or don’t deserve me, etc…

7. are there people you credit with this growth? who?

- yes, I think that some people helped me to grow. first, I think all the people who hurt me are deserving of the credit towards me developing the strength I needed to drop their negative asses. I also need to give SO MUCH CREDIT to my wonderful boyfriend for showing me what a real man is like and forcing me to deal with everything head-on instead of letting life steamroll me. he is miles ahead of me when it comes to self care but he supports the little steps that I am able to take and he is responsible for so much because of how he lifts me up and encourages me to put in the work. he believes in me and knows that I can and will be better and he has been willing to stay with me as I deal with my issues.

8. what is one piece of advice you’d give other people?

- I think I would tell people that giving up doesn’t fix anything. nothing is solved by letting life overtake you. pushing through when you’re barely keeping your head above water is the hardest thing that you can do. it does not always pay off immediately and sometimes it feels so pointless to keep swimming when it looks like there is water for miles and miles and miles but there is always eventually going to be land. you just have to find it, and I know you can.

9. what was the nicest thing someone did for you?

- his one is hard because my memory is not the best. I can’t think of anything specific but I’m sure that lots of people did lots of nice things for me.

10. who inspires you? why?

- my little inspires me. from the moment she joined my sorority I knew she was special, and as I got to know her and fall in love with her personality, I got so impressed with her and where she is in life in spite of all that has happened to her.

11. what are your main sources of inspiration? why?

- my inspiration mostly comes from people and hearing about the incredible things that some humans have done. hearing about the strength of other people makes me want to be strong.

12. what inspires you more: words, pictures, or music?

- music, for sure. there are so many amazing songs that spark my interest and provoke my thoughts.

13. what scares you, creatively?

- I am not really very creative at all. I think what stopped me from being creative is my fear of rejection. I was so terrified that people would hate me for what I wrote or drew or said that I kept it all to myself and let my creativity die out. maybe someday I will work on rekindling the creative ability, but it is not at the top of my list.

14. what did you enjoy working on most this year?

- my fish! owning bettas gave me something to look forward to doing and gave me an outlet to direct my focus and frustration through. any time I was having a hard day I knew I could look at my lil fishy boys and put my restlessness into caring for them and making sure that they were doing really well.

15. what did you have the most fun doing?

- the most fun I had in 2018 year probably came from being able to live with my roommate/soulmate again this semester. we have had our ups and downs but I love her so much and she is my other half, definitely. she brings out a whole new side of me that lets me be silly and goofy and myself around her.

16. what did you have the least fun doing?

- the least amount of fun in 2018 most likely came from the introspection that I had to do to contribute to my self-care. I did not enjoy the work it took, but I am pleased with the outcome of recognizing what needs to be changed and actually getting to make myself better and happier.

17. what is the best compliment you’ve gotten? why?

- I was recently told “your confidence, happiness, and strength has always inspired me! you’re an incredible human and I’m so thankful to be able to know you” and that was so incredible to hear because I don’t often think about the impact that I have on other people. I never thought I was important enough to influence another person’s life, let alone contribute to making it better in any way. I think it is really nice to know that even when I am struggling, I have the ability to positively impact others.

18. what is the best compliment anyone could ever give you?

- the best compliment would probably be something about how they have seen me grow throughout my years and continuously improve. I am not the best at keeping friends for more than a couple years at a time, so I don’t know if I will ever hear that one.

19. what do you wish people commented on more?

- about me??? I don’t know. I don’t really like other people talking about me lmao but I guess I like hearing people’s first impressions of me and how they differ from how I actually am. those are always fun to learn about.

20. what do you feel is the most underrated thing you have done? why?

- during my high school years, I played therapist A LOT to so many people. I put so much emotional labor into listening to other people and helping them figure out problems or just giving them a shoulder to cry on. rarely was this ever returned by those people, so I felt really used a lot of the time but honestly if I had to do it all over again I wouldn’t change a thing because I want to help people feel better.

21. name (and reblog) at least three things you’ve made this year that you’re proudest of.

- sorry, this one isn’t applicable to me. I don’t really make things or post them to tumblr.

22. what are your goals for next year?

- I plan to stop telling people things that aren’t any of their business. I spent a lot of time keeping everything to myself and when I finally started getting friends I felt like I had to tell them everything about me and my life to keep them interested, but that isn’t true. I need to learn how to keep some things private when they need to be.

I want to rekindle a lot of friendships that I messed up in 2018. I let a lot of people fade out of my life when I should not have.

I want to go to THERAPY!! I want to talk to professionals who can help me structure my path of healing!!!

I want to get more comfortable with the body I’m in. that means wearing less makeup, using fewer snapchat filters and other photo editing techniques, and judging myself less when I wear clothes that maybe aren’t the most flattering. it is okay to be ugly and I am not worth less for not being attractive. I want to stretch more and maybe get into a routine of exercising every now and then to feel better instead of to lose weight. I want to eat healthier and drink more water for my health instead of for the purpose of becoming skinny.

I want to make an effort to be more outgoing and get more involved in my sorority and with my Greek life.

23. name three things you like about yourself – and name one think you like about the person you reblogged this from.

I like my irises! my brown eyes are beautiful and unique no matter what anyone says. My eyes have rings like trees and uneven colors throughout. they are beautiful! I like how soft my hair is and I also like the shape of my lips.

something I like about the person I reblogged this ask from, @makingoutisgreat, is how strong and confident she seems. she is beautiful and she knows it and is not afraid to show it off. it is very inspiring.

[doingeverything]

it’s been an awfully long time since I logged into this website

but I’m feeling inspired.

Day 0 - 28/02/21. What is this?

It’s me guilt tripping myself. I imagine the only person to ever read this will be myself, unless I go slightly loopy at some point and decide to let somebody I know in on my embarrassing inner world, or if some poor tumblr dweller (do they still exist?) happens to stumble upon this. I’m really only putting this here due to the fact that I don’t want to have to carry around a diary for the next hundred or so days, and so I thought I’d use an online diary/blog. And then I realised I couldn’t be bothered learning a new platform given that only I will ever see this, and so I’ve subjected myself to the hellscape website that I lived on in my teens.

100 days. That’s the goal. I’ll start tomorrow. 

I have so many ideas and projects and dreams, and they shift round and round my head aimlessly, and I’ve decided, lockdown and pandemic be damned - or in fact, because of all that - I need to start taking action towards achieving them. Silly and small or grandiose and unachievable as they may seem, I want to do something. I’ve been making excuses for a lot of this for years. And don’t get me wrong, they were excellent excuses - I just finished a Masters in Electronic Engineering, and then at a similar time we were thrown into a literal pandemic, and I moved house to a city in which I know nobody and cannot meet anybody. So given the circumstances, it’s all okay. But I’m bored of okay. Let’s do some dreams. Let’s do everything.

My brain is cluttered and confused.

I’ll save this post as a draft and come back tomorrow to list all the things I want to do and that have been in my brain for god knows how long, and then here’s the plan: every day, I have to record everything I’ve done to work towards them. Preferably in a manner that’ll be interesting enough for me to come back and read them again. I must admit to being inspired (by a few things), lately.

Today, I finished Yes Man by Danny Wallace - he says Yes to everything, recorded it in a diary, and then wrote up the six months in the most brilliantly amusing way. I am feeling extremely inspired by it all.

The other week, one of my work colleagues (A, our data analyst) was talking to me about New Year’s Resolutions. He mentioned how he had decided to no longer do new year’s resolutions, but rather seasonal “Themes”. He linked me this video by CGP Grey and when I finally got round to watching it, I also found it very exciting. I decided to take on a theme - a theme of doing, or creating. And a season? Let’s say Spring. Or, since it’ll be easier to hold myself to it (I hope) - 100 days.

This video by Big Joel talking about T.S. Eliot’s “The Wasteland” and finding meaning in life. ) “Datta, dayadhvam, damyata” (Give, sympathise, control)

Yesterday I spent £299 on a Japanese Gothic Lolita dress on a bit of a whim, which is not really the kind of money I can afford to spend on a bit of whim, but it’s going to arrive at my London flat before I do, so I better make some use of it. More on that tomorrow.

Enough waffle, I need to sleep. I’ll write the list in the morning.

Day 1 - 01/03/21. White Rabbits!

Hello again. It’s nearly midnight, as I’ve spent most of the evening feeling inspired and thus writing chapter one of my new book, and thus not writing on this blog, but that’s good! But it also means I better move quickly, lest this bode ominously for my future punctuality.

Here’s that list I promised:

Get really good at work: start to bloody own my job.

Make sure that my family and friends know how much they mean to me.

Make new, London-based friends!

Finish a novel (I think this time it will be a children’s book, a spin on a cosy type murder mystery where  {spoiler redacted}! More on that in the future I expect, but I have spent quite a lot of time plotting and writing today, and I’m now 2.83k into a first draft!

Play at Instagram - see if I can get some kind of fame! (This sounds so vapid, but I think it will be incredibly fun. The plan is to utilise my niche fashion interests to grow an account by learning how to get good at the algorithm, and also using other communities e.g. those on Facebook and other sites. I really want to give it a go.) (Also, it would help to make me feel less bad about my clothes spending).

On a similar note, I’m kind of interested in starting a youtube channel -- something simple and fun, e.g. Gogglebox-style reactions to popular teen-y shows like Buffy or Gossip Girl. 

Put in the effort to practice my German.

Learn Japanese.

I would also love to teach ESL! I want to apply to do a little bit of tutoring on italki. Partly because I’d like the extra bit of money, but mostly because... well, it just seems really fun. And a cool way to meet new people!

I want to get fit - eat healthily, and try loads of different types of workouts. My job pay for me to use the app “Gympass”, which gives me access to loads of posh fancy classes, and I think would be super fun to use when London starts to open up again.

Similarly future-facing, and possibly beyond the scope of this initial 100 days, but: live my dream life in London. Go out dancing with friends, learn all the best bars and cafes and restaurants, go to the theatre, go for walks, take in every possible opportunity to become a hot, young, fashionable professional. Here are some vibes for free.

The white rabbits thing, by the way, is something Gdad said I should say on the first of March. I think it’s any month, actually, but I suppose it’s seasonally appropriate for March. I also couldn’t think of any other title, and it’s 23:54, so we’re rolling with it.

I’ll be back tomorrow!

[michaelandy101-blog]

Accessible Machine Learning for SEOs — Whiteboard Friday

New Post has been published on https://tiptopreview.com/accessible-machine-learning-for-seos-whiteboard-friday/

Accessible Machine Learning for SEOs — Whiteboard Friday

Machine learning — a branch of artificial intelligence that studies the automatic improvement of computer algorithms — might seem far outside the scope of your SEO work. MozCon speaker (and all-around SEO genius) Britney Muller is here with a special edition of Whiteboard Friday to tell you why that’s not true, and to go through a few steps to get you started. You can access the Colab notebook discussed in the video here. 

To see more on machine learning from Britney and our other MozCon 2020 presentations, check out this year’s video bundle. 

Get my MozCon 2020 video bundle

Click on the whiteboard image above to open a high resolution version in a new tab!

Video Transcription

Hey, Moz fans. Welcome to this special edition of Whiteboard Friday. Today we are taking a sneak peek at what I spoke about at MozCon 2020, where I made machine learning accessible to SEOs everywhere.

This is so, so exciting because it is readily at your fingertips today, and I’m going to show you exactly how to get started. 

So to kick things off, I learned about this weird concept called brood parasites this summer, and it’s fascinating. It’s basically where one animal tricks another animal of the same species to raise its young.

It’s fascinating, and the more I learned about it, the more I realized: oh my gosh, I’m sort of like a brood parasite when it comes to programming and machine learning! I latch on and find these great models that do all the work — all of the raising — and I put in my data and my ideas, and it does things for me.

So we are going to use this concept to our advantage. In fact, I have been able to teach my dad most of these models that, again, are readily available to you today within a tool called Colab. Let me just walk you through what that looks like. 

Models to get you started

So to get started, if you want to start warming up right now, just start practicing by holding down “Shift” and then press “Enter”.

Just start practicing that right now. It’s half the battle. You’re about to fire up some really cool models. 



All right. What are some examples of that? What does that look like? So some of the models you can play with today are things like DeOldify, which is where you repair and colorize old photos. It’s really, really fun. 

Another one is a text generator. I created one with GTP-2 — super silly, it’s this excuse generator. You can manipulate it and make it do different things for you. 

There’s also a really, really great forecasting model, where you basically put in a chunk of time series data and it predicts what the future might have in store. It’s really, really powerful and fun.

You can summarize text, which is really valuable. Think about meta descriptions, all that good stuff. 

You can also automate keyword research grouping, which I’ll show you here in a second. 

You can do really powerful internal link analysis, have a notebook for that.

Perhaps one of the most powerful things is you can extract entities and categories as Google perceives them. It’s one of my favorite APIs. It’s through Google’s NLP API. I pull it into a notebook, and you basically put the URLs you want to extract this information from and you can compare how your URL compares to competitors.

It’s really valuable, fun stuff. 

Most importantly, you cannot break any of this! 

Do not be intimidated by any of the code whatsoever. Lots of seasoned developers don’t know what’s happening in some of those code blocks. It’s okay.

Using Colab

We get to play in this environment. It’s hosted in Google Drive, and so there’s no fear of this breaking anything on your computer or with your data or anything. So let’s dive in. As I said, this is through a free tool called Colab. 

You know how Google took Excel and made Google Sheets?

They did the same thing with what’s known as Jupyter Notebooks. Jupyter is installed locally on your computer. It’s one of the most popular notebook environments. But it requires some setup, and can be somewhat clunky. It gets confused with different versions and yada, yada. Google put that into the cloud (zero setup required) and is now calling it Colab Notebooks. It’s unbelievably powerful.

So, again, it’s free. It’s available to you right now if you want to open it up in a new tab. There is zero setup. Google also gives you access to free GPU and TPU computing, which is great. It has a 12-hour runtime. 

Some cons is that you can hit limits. So I hit the limits, and now I’m paying $9.99 a month for the Pro version and I’ve had no problems.

Again, I’m not affiliated with this whatsoever. I’m just super passionate about it, and the fact that they offer you a free version is so exciting. I’ve already seen a lot of people get started in this. It’s also something to note that it’s probably not as secure or robust as Google’s Enterprise solution. So if you’re doing this for a large company or you’re getting really serious about this, you should probably check out some other options. But if you’re just kind of dabbling and want to explore and have fun, let’s keep this party going. 

Using pandas

All right. So again, this is a cloud-hosted notebook environment. So one thing that I want to really focus on here, because I think it’s the most valuable for SEOs, is this library known as “pandas“.

Pandas is a data analysis library built on top of python. After running just two lines of code, you can upload a CSV file from your local computer. This silly example is one that I really did run with Google Search Console data.

So you run this in a notebook (Shift + Return). Again, I’m sharing this entire notebook with you today. So just click into the first text cell and start running Shift + Click to bring you down through the notebook. It’s not as intimidating as it looks.

Once you run the above code, upload your CSV. Then once you upload it, you are going to name your data frame. 

After uploading your CSV, you will see the output that states your CSV name. Copy that exactly how it’s been uploaded and paste it into the next (above cell) to name it.

In this case, mine was just “gsc-example.csv”. Again, once you upload your CSV, you will see the name in the output beneath the “from. google.colab import files” code cell. 

Now, let’s run some simple lines of code to make sure that your data is in there properly.

A common first check people do is “df.head()”. This shows you the first five rows of your data frame. You can also do “df.tail()”, and it shows you the last five rows of your data frame.

You can even put in a number in the parentheses (ex. df.head(30)) to see the first 30 rows. It’s that easy! 

Now comes the really fun stuff, and this is just tip of the iceberg.

So you can run this really, really cool code cell here to create a filterable table. 

What’s powerful about this, especially with your Google Search Console data, is you can easily extract and explore keywords that have a high click-through rate and a poor rank in search. It’s one of my favorite ways to explore keyword opportunities for clients, and it couldn’t be easier.

So, play around with the filterable view.

If you’re doing keyword research, you’re trying to bucket keywords, you’re trying to organize topics, etc. but you can more easily organize your keywords with Pandas.

Here’s how to create a new column that states whether or not a keyword is ‘Branded’. 

So to walk you through this, “df[“Branded”]” creates a new column called “Branded”. 

Then “df.Query.str.contains(“moz|rand|ose”)” uses regex that labels any query with those keywords as Branded = True. 

So now that makes filtering and exploring that so much faster! You can even do this in ways where you can create an entirely different data frame table (examples of that are also in this notebook). 

You can use that and export your keywords into buckets like that, and there’s no stall time. Things don’t freeze up like Excel. You can account for misspellings and all sorts of good stuff more easily with regular expressions. It’s super cool.

Conclusion

Again, this is just tip of the iceberg, my friends. I am most excited to plant this seed within all of you so that you guys can come back and teach me what you’ve been able to accomplish. I think we have so much more to explore in this space. It is going to be so much fun! If you get a kick out of this and you want to continue exploring different models, different programs within Colab, I highly suggest you download the Colab Chrome extension.

It just makes opening up the notebook so much easier. 

You can save copys of notebooks you discover to your drive and play with it all you want. It’s so much fun. I hope this sparked some inspiration in you, and I am so excited to hear what all of you think and create. -Really appreciate you watching.

So thank you so much. I will see you all next time. Bye.

Video transcription by Speechpad.com

Ready for more?

You’ll uncover even more SEO goodness in the MozCon 2020 video bundle. At this year’s special low price of $129, this is invaluable content you can access again and again throughout the year to inspire and ignite your SEO strategy:

21 full-length videos from some of the brightest minds in digital marketing

Instant downloads and streaming to your computer, tablet, or mobile device

Downloadable slide decks for presentations

Get my MozCon 2020 video bundle

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[peterjonesparker]

have a soulmate au in the form of headcanons because i am too lazy and unmotivated for fic right now. this is slightly inspired by the song whole wide world by cage the elephant, which is a jam and peter parker would totally listen to it, our little mainstream indie music lover. also there is a soulmate au fic with ~soulmate words~ that is phenomenal and everyone should read it. you can find it here. (seriously it’s so good please read it i’m in love) (also, i’ve taken spanish for a long time and yet am still so bad at it so if you speak spanish and i’ve managed to fuck up the one sentence i needed to craft, please let me know and i’ll fix it. rip me and my sad spanish education)

part two now here.

peter is like...the most excited to see what his words will be

he’s thirteen and his still haven’t shown up

some of his friends already have theirs. (hell he met one person who’d already met their soulmate.) other are waiting just like him

and like...of course there’s a part of peter that’s worries he’ll never develop words and never have a soulmate

may tells him that of all the people in the world, he’s going to find love no matter what

which is comforting for a bit but he’s still worried

no one really understands the timeline of soul mark development. some people are born with their words, some get their words when they develop speech, some get their words when they enter puberty, others get their words on a random wednesday while they’re slurping the last bits of applesauce from their cup in the dining hall

everyone is different, but it’s still a special moment. and usually soulmates will develop their words around the same time

and then one day may is doing the laundry and asks peter for the filthy shirt he’s wearing (he tried to play football with the other kids in his class and it went very, very poorly for him. read: he was pushed into the muddy puddle from this morning’s rain) and then she gasps and drops the laundry basket

“peter, your words!” and peter’s eyes widen and he gasps and runs to the mirror to see the words scribbled across his right pec

and: “they’re in spanish?”

may scrunches her eyes and read the words more closely. “oh yeah. that’s exciting! maybe your soulmate lives in a different country.” she hugs him tightly. “i knew you’d get your words. we’ll have a special dinner tonight. i’ll tell ben” she picks the laundry basket off the floor and grabs the shirt peter’d dropped in his rush to get to the mirror. “i’d ask mr. delmar what your words say.”

peter spends the next hour until dinner researching statistics. he finds out spanish is the second most popular language in the us and there are twenty two spanish speaking countries. so, in all honesty, his search for his soulmate isn’t any narrower

some people’s words give them hints. words like “wow, don’t you just love central park at sunset?” or “i always used to hate new year’s eve, but this party is actually a lot of fun.”

part of peter wishes his words would tell him something about where or when he’d find his soulmate. but all he knows is that his soulmate speaks spanish and has lost their dog

so naturally, peter starts taking spanish classes. because he wants to be able to communicate with his soulmate and he doesn’t know if his soulmate will be able to speak english. so spanish class it is

and he actually really likes the language and he practices with mr. delmar and ned’s taking it too

and peter starts researching everything about spanish speaking countries and dreams up plans to visit them. he’ll visit the major cities in each country and also visit cities in the us with a large spanish speaking population. he figures those will increase his odds of finding his soulmate

so peter’s soulmate becomes his main concern

but then he gets bitten by a radioactive spider and he develops superpowers and becomes spiderman

and then ben dies. and it fucking sucks

and his soulmate seems less important for a while

honestly, he almost forgets about his soulmate. he still takes spanish because he figures it’s important to learn, soulmate aside. but he stops doing research and he stops talking through his trip plans with may

he focuses on grieving with may and protecting the little guy

and it’s nice

it works for a while

he and may are incredibly close and he feels like he’s actually helping people

and then at the beginning of his sophomore year as he’s sitting in his intermediate spanish class and barely paying attention, he hears his words

“hola. ¿me puedes ayudar a buscar mi perro?”

and peter’s eyes widen and he turns toward the voice that just spoke to him and said his words

it’s michelle jones. she’s on the decathlon team. they’ve obviously never spoken. but they’ve exchanged head nods as they passed each other in the hall. and he spent so long planning all these wonderful trips to different countries and mapped out dog parks in each city and it was all so he could be sitting in a classroom in new york city in high school

so

“you’ve got to be kidding me.”

and he watches as michelle’s eyes widen and then narrow, her mouth falls into a scowl, she grabs her book bag, spits out a hasty “fuck you”, and storms out of the classroom

fuck

peter parker is an idiot

100% the dumbest person he knows

so he grabs his bag and runs after michelle, calling her name and ignoring the teacher’s protests and demands that they stay in the classroom

he runs to the library, which is the place he’s seen her most often, and finds her hidden away in the book stacks toward the back

she’s got her head stuffed in a book, like she usually does, but her eyes are slightly puffy and red

he walks slowly, as if he’s afraid she’ll run off again. but if she notices him, she doesn’t do anything to show it. she just continues to read her book, looking resolutely forward and not at all toward him as he puts his hand against the bookshelf to lower himself down beside her

he opens his mouth to say something but she speaks first

“you know, this whole soulmate business is a load of bullshit. i hope you know that.”

and. it stings. he realizes he’s just pissed her off immensely and she probably wants nothing to do with him. but his heart swelled a bit when he heard her say his words. and he was glad. and also just...surprised

but then she continues, voice slightly broken and her eyes watery: “what did i do? how were you already disappointed?” then, slightly more indignant: “i’m fucking awesome, just so you know. you’d be so lucky.” she whispers the last part, going back to her book. she sounds incredibly vulnerable and peter feels like an unmitigated ass

“i’m not disappointed it’s you.” he glances over at her, but she’s still got her eyes trained on the book. “it’s actually kind of funny.” he chuckles and michelle sends him a death glare and he pales a bit. “it’s just, you spoke to me in spanish! i thought my soulmate was going to be in another country or maybe only spoke spanish or something. i thought i was going to have to sit in dog parks waiting around for someone to ask me for help. i didn’t think it’d be in spanish class.”

and even to him the excuse sounds silly and doesn’t at all justify the fact that michelle had to look at her words, worrying that her soulmate was already disappointed and he feels so badly and wishes he had more social graces and would have said something nicer and more suave

but he’s peter parker and he’s awkward and he never says the right thing. and michelle might not want anything to do with him ever. which, would hurt. he wants to fall in love with his soulmate. he wants to be friends with her and study with her and get coffee with her and plan their lives

but some soulmates don’t stay together. for whatever reason, sometimes it doesn’t work out. and maybe peter’s just someone who won’t have this soulmate bond. maybe he’s just going to live his life and remember how he ruined everything with the first words he said to his soulmate

but then michelle is scoffing. she grabs a pen from her bag and then his hand and is writing down ten digits on his palm

“you’re lucky you have a cute butt.” and with that she stands and walks away

peter looks after her, confused and slightly in shock and also blushing because she said he had a cute butt

and michelle says quickly, right before she leaves their little alcove, “text me and try not to fuck it up this time, loser.”

and then she’s really gone and peter’s staring at his hand and this is her phone number

he’s a little thrilled. and then he thinks about all his plans to travel to mexico and panama and ecuador and argentina and spain and all the other spanish speaking countries

and he thinks that it’ll likely be more fun to travel with his soulmate anyway

[bloggerjoedoe]

Posted by BritneyMuller

Machine learning — a branch of artificial intelligence that studies the automatic improvement of computer algorithms — might seem far outside the scope of your SEO work. MozCon speaker (and all-around SEO genius) Britney Muller is here with a special edition of Whiteboard Friday to tell you why that's not true, and to go through a few steps to get you started. 

To see more on machine learning from Britney and our other MozCon 2020 speakers, check out this year's video bundle. 

Get my MozCon 2020 video bundle

Click on the whiteboard image above to open a high resolution version in a new tab!

Video Transcription

Hey, Moz fans. Welcome to this special edition of Whiteboard Friday. Today we are taking a sneak peek at what I spoke about at MozCon 2020, where I made machine learning accessible to SEOs everywhere.

This is so, so exciting because it is readily at your fingertips today, and I'm going to show you exactly how to get started. 

So to kick things off, I learned about this weird concept called brood parasites this summer, and it's fascinating. It's basically where one animal tricks another animal of the same species to raise its young.

It's fascinating, and the more I learned about it, the more I realized: oh my gosh, I'm sort of like a brood parasite when it comes to programming and machine learning! I latch on and find these great models that do all the work — all of the raising — and I put in my data and my ideas, and it does things for me.

So we are going to use this concept to our advantage. In fact, I have been able to teach my dad most of these models that, again, are readily available to you today within a tool called Colab. Let me just walk you through what that looks like. 

Models to get you started

So to get started, if you want to start warming up right now, just start practicing clicking "Shift" and then click "Enter".

Just start practicing that right now. It's half the battle. You're about to be firing up some really cool models. 



All right. What are some examples of that? What does that look like? So some of the models you can play with today are things like DeOldify, which is where you repair and colorize old photos. It's really, really fun. 

Another one is a text generator. I created one with GTP-2 — super silly, it's this excuse generator. You can manipulate it and make it do different things for you. 

There's also a really, really great forecasting model, where you basically put in a chunk of time series data and it predicts what the future might have in store. It's really, really powerful and fun.

You can summarize text, which is really valuable. Think about meta descriptions, all that good stuff. 

You can also automate keyword research grouping, which I'll show you here in a second. 

You can do really powerful internal link analysis, set up a notebook for that.

Perhaps one of the most powerful things is you can extract entities and categories as Google perceives them. It's one of my favorite APIs. It's through Google's NLP API. I pull it into a notebook, and you basically put the URLs you want to extract this information from and you can compare how your URL compares to competitors.

It's really, really valuable, fun stuff. So most importantly, you cannot break any of this. Do not be intimidated by any of the code whatsoever. Lots of seasoned developers don't know what's happening in some of those code blocks. It's okay.

Using Colab

We get to play in this environment. It's hosted in Google Drive, and so there's no fear of this breaking anything on your computer or with your data or anything. So just get ready to dive in with me. Please, it's going to be so much fun. Okay, so like I said, this is through a free tool called Colab. So you know how Google basically took Excel and made Google Sheets?

They did the same thing with what's known as Jupyter Notebooks. So these were locally on computers. It's one of the most popular notebook environments. But it requires some setup, and it can be somewhat clunky. It gets confused with different versions and yada, yada. Google put that into the cloud and is now calling it Colab. It's unbelievably powerful.

So, again, it's free. It's available to you right now if you want to open it up in a new tab. There is zero setup. Google also gives you access to free GPU and TPU computing, which is great. It has a 12-hour runtime. 

Some cons is that you can hit limits. So I hit the limits, and now I'm paying $9.99 a month for the Pro version and I've had no problems.

Again, I'm not affiliated with this whatsoever. I'm just super passionate about it, and the fact that they offer you a free version is so exciting. I've already seen a lot of people get started in this. It's also something to note that it's probably not as secure or robust as Google's Enterprise solution. So if you're doing this for a large company or you're getting really serious about this, you should probably check out some other options. But if you're just kind of dabbling and want to explore and have fun, let's keep this party going. 

Using pandas

All right. So again, this is basically a cloud hosted notebook environment. So one thing that I want to really focus on here, because I think it's the most valuable for SEOs, is this library known as "pandas".

Pandas is a data frame library, where you basically run one — or two — lines of code. You can choose your file from your local computer, so I usually just upload CSVs. This silly example is one that I really did run with Google Search Console data.

So you run this in a notebook. Again, I'm sharing this entire notebook with you today. So if you just go to it and you do this, it brings you through the cells. It's not as intimidating as it looks. So if you just click into that first cell, even if it's just that text cell, "Shift + Enter", it will bring you through the notebook. 

So once you get past and once you fire up this chunk of code right here, upload your CSV. Then once you upload it, you are going to name your data frame. 

So these are the only two cells you need to really change or do anything with if you want. Well, you need to. 

So we are uploading your file, and then we are grabbing that file name. In this case, mine was just "gsc-example.csv". Again, once you upload it, you will see the name in that output here. So you just put that within this code block, run this, and then you can do some really easy lines of code to check to make sure that your data is in there.

So one of the first ones that most people do is "df". This is your data frame that you named with your file right here. So you just do "df.head()". This shows you the first five rows of your data frame. You can also do "df.tail()", and it shows you the last five rows of your data frame.

You can even put in a number in here to modify how many rows you want to explore. So maybe you do "df.head(30)", and then you see the first 30 rows. It's that easy just to get it in there and to see it. Now comes the really fun stuff, and this is just tip of the iceberg.

So you can run this really, really cool code cell here to create a filterable table. What's powerful about this, especially with your Google Search Console data, is you can easily extract and explore keywords that have high click-through rate and a low ranking in search. It's one of my favorite ways to explore keyword opportunities for clients, and it couldn't be easier.

So check that out. This is kind of the money part right here. 

If you're doing keyword research, which can take a lot, right, you're trying to bucket keywords, you're trying to organize topics and all that good stuff, you can instantly create a new column with pandas with branded keyword terms.

So just to walk you through this, we're going "df["Branded"]". This is the name of the new column we're going to create. We have this query string "contains," and this is just regex, ("moz|rand|ose"). So any keywords that contain one of those words gets in the "Branded" column a "True".

So now that makes filtering and exploring that so much faster. You can even do this in ways where you can create an entirely different data frame table. So sometimes if you have lots and lots of data, you can use the other cell in that example. All of these examples will be in the notebook.

You can use that and export your keywords into buckets like that, and there's no stall time. Things don't freeze up like Excel. You can account for misspellings and all sorts of good stuff so, so easily with regular expressions. So super, super cool.

Conclusion

Again, this is just tip of the iceberg, my friends. I am most excited to sort of plant this seed within all of you so that you guys can come back and teach me what you've been able to accomplish. I think we have so much more to explore in this space. It is going to be so much fun. If you get a kick out of this and you want to continue exploring different models, different programs within Colab, I highly suggest you download the Colab Chrome extension.

It just makes opening up the notebook so much easier. You can save a copy to your drive and play with it all you want. It's so much fun. I hope this kind of sparked some inspiration in some of you, and I am so excited to hear what all of you think and create. I really appreciate you watching.

So thank you so much. I will see you all next time. Bye.

Video transcription by Speechpad.com

Ready for more?

You'll uncover even more SEO goodness in the MozCon 2020 video bundle. At this year's special low price of $129, this is invaluable content you can access again and again throughout the year to inspire and ignite your SEO strategy:

21 full-length videos from some of the brightest minds in digital marketing

Instant downloads and streaming to your computer, tablet, or mobile device

Downloadable slide decks for presentations

Get my MozCon 2020 video bundle

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Source: Moz Blog