#i'll be fine i just need to scream

[zaukiel]

feeling very Normal lately.

so normal

[andy-clutterbuck]

The Ones Who Live | 1x03 - Bye

[wraenata]

I think I'm going to take a little break from tumblr (more than I already am). Sally is not doing great. Everything is really exhausting and I just don't have the energy to scroll and reblog stuff. I'll probably pop in and reblog some stuff if I can but, don't expect much. I'm sorry. I hope you're all doing well!

[crimeronan]

i'm currently having a fascinating flareup where everything in my body is on fire, but instead of sleeping through it like i used to, i'm combating the physical urge to leave my apartment at 4:30 AM in my good shoes and literally just run as far as i physically can before i finally collapse and have to call a lyft home. this is not a practical thing to do when you still have a migraine that means you cannot look at streetlights or headlights or the rising sun. so i googled "why does pain make me want to run," because i thought surely this isn't just a me thing, maybe there's a pinched nerve somewhere or a muscular issue i can resolve, i Know there are subreddits Filled with chronic pain tips, whatever. unfortunately, google is not built for this kind of literalism, and so the entire first page of results is just ["you forget to cherish her" voice] "Oh..... Sweetheart..... Poor Suffering Babbu.... Honey Bunches Of Oats..... You Are So Afraid..... Of Your Own Self....."

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

if dorian didn't show up, do you think louis would have shot minnie?

I do. I know some people think either he wouldn't have or he would've missed so that's why the writers had him shoot Dorian instead, but mmmmmm no, I don't personally think so. I like to think that if he had taken the shot, his shaky hands would've caused him to shoot her fatally.

Mostly because I'm already so normal about the fact that of the Ericson crew, Marlon and Louis are the only ones with a body count. Well, that we know of, but shown to us in the game, at least. Plus, we know it's Louis' first kill.

Like yeah, Clementine and AJ become part of the crew and they have bigger body counts, and if we're counting indirect kills caused by actions, then Tenn has a count... and I guess everyone has blood on their hands for blowing up the boat... but I'm talking about killed directly with a weapon like....... I lied, I'm not normal about that at all, Louis and Marlon are the ones who have killed someone in Louis' route. I'm also not normal about the fact that Louis kills Dorian and then even as he's clearly in shock, he tries to go with Clementine to get AJ, and then later on when they talk about it, he says it feels like bile but not quite and he's glad he has it in him to do it.... listen, listen, listen... I'm obsessed with that.

Anyway, so if Louis shot Minerva, I think he would've accidentally killed her and can you imagine? He's already enough of a mess after killing the woman who pinned him down and tried to cut his finger off [or succeeded] but he knew Minerva, they were friends before the twins were taken. Even Violet couldn't kill her even though that would've been the smarter thing to do, and we know thanks to meta knowledge that killing her would've saved lives, but Violet couldn't, and I don't think Louis would intentionally either.

Speaking of Violet, if Louis killed Minerva, I hate to think about what that would've done to Vi. I think she might've actually left at that point, like what was planned before it got changed to her being burned. I don't think she would've attacked Louis over it, though, like yeah she attacked Clementine in the cell but Louis? I don't know, but I don't think so just because it's Louis and he'd be a mess about it anyway.

Though if he did kill her, it would be a neat parallel to draw... y'know, because Louis forgave AJ for killing Marlon even though he was pissed and heartbroken, and Violet was annoyed with him the entire time... but could she ever forgive Louis for killing Minerva? Y'know? We already have a similar parallel with AJ shooting Tenn, but still.

If Clementine killed Minerva in that moment, though, then I could see Violet attacking her since in her eyes, Clem proved her right.

So yeah, I get why they added the Dorian kill to his route. It adds another compelling element to Louis as a character, but we also need Minerva alive for episode 4; Louis can't kill her, he can't miss, and he's not going to stay with her because we need Violet to stay on the boat and him to be on shore for all routes.

[bumblingbabooshka]

One of the best Voyager scenes to indicate Tuvok & Neelix's dynamic and how I think Tuvok is just as if not more 'annoying'(positive) than Neelix is when Neelix pours Tuvok a fresh squeezed glass of a fruit juice blend and Tuvok's like (paraphrased) "I don't want to drink this." and Neelix is like "Can you please try it?" and Tuvok's like "I don't want to, you're really bad at this sort of thing. It's going to taste bad." and Neelix says that Ensign XYZ said she LOVED it, she even had a second glass! And Tuvok says Ensign XYZ could drink poison without a second thought and Neelix is like "Tuvok could you please just TRY it? Just try a little SIP of it PLEASE??" and Tuvok sighs and rolls his eyes and sniffs it before taking a sip and it turns out he loves it. Turns out it tasted good actually. And then after all that Neelix tries to talk to him over eggs (which he's again cooking fresh for him) and Tuvok tells him he doesn't wanna hear "the life history of his breakfast." Absolutely insufferable this man I would have burned his eggs on PURPOSE!!!!

[deer-with-a-stick]

if netflix makes Luo Ji non-chinese I'm going to throw myself off a fucking cliff

[witchydykebitch]

Having ocd that primarily revolves around health/medical shit and then having one of your intrusive thoughts actually happen is!! Really fucking scary!! I hate it I hate it I hate iiiit!!

[boyslit]

undersketch alpha version of my spouses so i don't fucking explode trying to fix my computer so i can play dqb2 Even though it worked fine last night but my computer shits itself if i saved in the rain or next to the goddamn ocean and cries and throws up if i try to make it load the soggy save *explodes*

[bear-man74]

Hungy. Want wagon wheels..

[tardis--dreams]

First day of work. Gotta be there at 9. Do i dare to take the train that is scheduled to arrive at a perfect 8:25 or do i take the one an hour early and freeze to death at the train station for an hour and a half there

[tweexcore-undrgrnd]

hopecore mercenary put on your uniform I have a job for you....I need you... to get out of bed before 10 and go have a peaceful coffee in town..while reading a nice book. it's a grueling task I know... but someone has to do it....

I'm so fucking miserable oh my god oh my GOD I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE I HATE THIS STUPID FUCK WORLD AND MY RIDICULOUS SITCOM ESQUE LIFE I would krill myself right this second if I had the energy but honestly that takes so much effort I might as well just lie on the ground and roll about in anguish instead

ime so. tirede. of this. I don't even know what I want anymore or what I could even hope for I keep imagining I'm stuck in a coma and will wake up any second now from this hellscape of a life but it never happens. I'm struggling to find purpose despite my understanding that it's self-defined. I know what defines my 'self' to a degree but is it real? is anything I say worth it if it's all in an echo chamber? if a tree falls in a forest will anyone know when I swallow a handful of razors?

ok enough of that goodnight

[octarineblues]

.

[theangrypomeranian]

I am having A Time TM today

[strangefable]

just have to crylaugh when a perfectly random innocuous thing slams into you like a fucking freight train and reminds you that no, actually, you're never going to stop being traumatized about your dead parents

[l0rd-0f-c0ws]

they should create a being 17 that isn't full of big scary monster (not cool kind) and that is fun and happy and full of big scary monsters (cool kind)