#i'm also writing two other projects

[iamthecomet]

Someday I will figure out how to balance fan fiction and original fiction so that I can write both without stressing out about either. Today is not that day.

[drewsaturday]

it is always kind of funny, albeit frustrating, to spend years of my life rotating particular characters and ships in my head and still worry that i'm exploring them in ooc ways. lol.

[seagullcharmer]

save me npc character design..........

[ghostoffuturespast]

Being a writer is weird.

[burning-academia-if]

You have other visual novels (or IFs)???? On my knees respectfully begging for the name(s) 🙏 if you're comfortable sharing that is

I do! I'm planning on just putting Burning Academia on my main itch.io page because making a separate account sounds tedious lol so I don't mind sharing the link.

I only have 2 finished games and a demo for a tentative project as far as VNs go + a novella and short story collection on there. But to anon and anyone else reading this, I'm going to need you to promise me to keep one thing in mind, ok?

Memory Ghosts was my first attempt at making a VN in 2020 and if you play it, it's not reflective of any of my current skills lmfaO

Anyway here's my itch.io page.

Also some quick guidelines, although I'm sure it's probably obvious:

This blog is just for BA. I won't answer anything related to my other projects on here.

Less a point and more an add on to 1; Despite me ultimately deciding to put BA on my main itch.io page I do want to keep this separate from everything else for personal reasons. This means the opposite is true. If you're also interested in Everything Else and follow my ""main""" tumblr I won't answer questions there in regards to BA. In fact, you'll likely never find mention of it there.

[thats-a-lot-of-cortisol]

Aspect of Order: Primordial & Present-Day

One of the first deities, part of what is known as the Primordial Triad. It created the planes alongside the Aspects of Chaos and the In-Between and held dominion over the Material Plane. It embodied order in the way nature has order: the life cycle, gravity, the tides, the surety that the seasons will change, the patterns that appear in flora and fauna alike, the symmetry of pinecones and butterflies. It was associated with the night as a time of quiet preparation where the world rests, and when one can see the remains of creation in the darkened sky. It is said that the two moons of the Material Plane are its eyes, watching over its creations.

All three members of the Primordial Triad are referred to with "it", so ancient and unfathomable that applying a mortal, transient concept of gender to them seemed almost blasphemous.

Almost.

The modern-day conception of Order is quite different. Though she still reigns over the night and natural laws, her followers have placed her at the forefront of the creation process, reducing the In-Between's role and rejecting Chaos altogether. Though most present-day cultures think of her in this way, many of them do not emphasize her: she is an invisible Over-God, keeping the other deities and forces in line and maintaining cosmic balance from behind the scenes. In places where she is worshipped heavily, however, she is placed at the forefront of the pantheon. In those cases, worship of deities with overlapping domains is either illegal (ex local gods of justice) or considered secondary to her (ex the god of the Wilds). The worship of smaller, local deities is usually discouraged or suppressed over-all in these areas in order to encourage a more structured, uniform religious practice. While both aspects of Order championed paladins, Primordial Order also championed druids and rangers while Modern Order champions clerics.

Ancient theologians debated whether or not Order and Chaos were two aspects of the same being (ironically, there was no question that the In-Between was its own separate force). However, following the iconoclasm that effectively forced Chaos out of the pantheon and created the modern conception of Order, such lines of thought were considered heretical, and then blasphemous.

The iconoclasm did have an unintended consequence, however. Crying motifs appeared in some art of Primordial Order around that time, particularly in the areas that resisted the iconoclasts more intensely. Some scholars believe that it may have been a direct reaction to the event: Order mourning the loss of its counterpart. Others have argued, however, that the lack of such motifs (or equivalents) in depictions of the In-Between prove this wrong. After all, why would it not also be grieving?

[sentient-magpie]

where's that post about being autistic and being told to not lie and then finding out so much of our working lives is telling little mistruths????

[tragicclownwrites]

🤡

[starsandthorn]

really was feeling soo bad about not being able to write shit these past few days then bam. 2000 words of doomed yuri

[you-will-return]

---

[17yearcicada]

i am going to sleep i've decided. goodnight

[coffeeandcalligraphy]

that lyric in athena by greyson chance where he goes "I don’t want to be the man I was / I want to jump into the innocence of your touch / fall into your ocean hands / pick me like a cherry blossom in Japan" is lonancore btw

[mymarifae]

writing and what's a little kiss between bros? has been fun though because like. well for one i didn't realize i had a knack for romantic comedy - but i do. it's a fun genre to play around in, turns out. and just the fact that it's been received so well and so excitedly like OH YEAH i'm good at writing and i am 100% capable of crafting a story that balances the serious with the funny with the sweet with the... whatever. and i'm just happy i could make some people smile with what i wrote :) because writing it made Me smile and while like, yeah, make art for yourself first and foremost, it's like. gratifying to show it and be met with so many smiles and happy faces. i like knowing i can make the world a brighter place for someone else, even just for a few moments :') i'm excited about chapter 7 - it'll be quite long, but i want to say a very fond farewell to this little thing that i've made. and then... we'll just have to see what's next! lalalala

[polaris-australis]

WIP Update - Replace Their Bones with Doll Parts

I've decided to try to write a more coherent post on some of the recent progress on the novel. For those who read my intro post, I did change the pronoun in the title (I can't decide on if I should use "he" or "they" solely because, well, Cyril's not really a he by the end of the novel).

I did make some changes to a chapter I talked about in an earlier post (Anatomy Practice), but for this update, I'm going to focus on some overarching stuff + a later chapter that I worked on recently.

I will, though, reiterate this paragraph because I'm obsessed with it:

I'll talk about it another time, because of FUCK does this need a longer separate post (I call it the I guess thematic thesis of the novel in a way?? in how it establishes a LOT of Cyril's mental state throughout the novel and gives us the starting point from which he somehow manages to keep going downhill).

Immaculate Perpetuation

The chapter title comes from two terms relating to the Virgin Mary (or versions of the Virgin): immaculate conception, and Our Lady of Perpetual Health. Except, a big thing in this book is continuing cycles of generational abuse as well as toxic dynamics, so I sort of mashed things together into this.

To make it clear again in this post, Cyril's mixed: his father is a rich white guy, his mother is Latinx (Central American specifically, the country isn't specified for reasons so I won't say it but for reference my parents are Salvadoran). Cyril looks like his mother a LOT. She also had significant issues physically and mentally during and after pregnancy. All of this has led to them having an extremely strained relationship where they hardly interact.

Anyways. Cyril imagines whether or not she wanted to drown him during baptism (TW for imagined infanticide I guess??)

To be very clear, this didn't happen. He's spiraling.

The first sentence references a (still not quite edited) part about her ignoring him when he cried as a baby, as told to him by his older half-brother.

At the end of this chapter, he has a dream about drowning in a womb.

(Fun fact: I started editing this section during @coffeeandcalligraphy's livestream the other day. I asked for permission before tagging. If you read this Rachel, I deeply apologize but figure you may appreciate the disaster main character content lmao.)

Lines that I'd like to also mention:

His skin raisins, his insides burning.

Trying to play with verbs more? This isn't my best, just one I appreciate.

He is a body and he is a wound.

I was going to post that whole paragraph, but I'm not super happy with it yet.

Also, this isn't part of this chapter, but it's got a similar theme.

He's my babygirl.

I'm going to wait since this post is long enough, but other excerpts I definitely want to share include the vampire dream (it's relevant I swear) and possibly some of the more religious imagery, in which I cannot figure out if Cyril is comparing himself to Jesus, Judas, or the snake. Or all three. Genuinely would love to make a uquiz out of this.

[maddy-ferguson]

euphoria should just get cancelled i am not sorry but i hate levinson.

i really enjoy being a known sam levinson hater everywhere i go this blog with always be sfslh (safe for sam levinson haters). but actually can you imagine being an actor on that show they didn't know euphoria would last years and years people are always talking about the cast of riverdale being prisoners or whatever but what about the cast of euphoria

this is so random lol

[loving-jack-kelly]

i have 5 final projects due in the next two weeks and three of them are due on the same day lmao. lmao. lmao.