#i'm cooked dawg

[skurlly]

kuromi Ingo and my melody Emmet

hi I like talking to my friends 🫵(grabs you and shakes you around like a mii) about lolita dresses, fashion and everything cute. This mixes in with my off brand vampire au.

[bird-in-a-fish-cage]

LET ME COOK 💥💥💥

RAAAAHHHHH

[aivy-saur]

Can my profs just give me an excuse to draw Leona for my outputs I swear I will cook that shit faster than any output I've ever made in my LIFE

[orangeocelotmartyn]

Martyn raids Ren after revealing he’d accidentally not replied to him and Ren is Dramatic about it.

I cut out a lot of dead air (read: all of the moments of Ren waiting for his sounds to end) to trim this down, and the transcription is under the cut:

Martyn: We should go um, raid, uhm...actually, my boy Ren-Diggity-Dawg's on. Let's go raid Ren. Ren-Diggity-Dawg. Actually I got a message the other day from Ren that I still need to reply to, I just, I saw it before I went live...today, and I was like, ''oop, don't know how that one slipped past me." Is it RenDogTV? It is, right, sweet! Uh, right, enjoy Ren's stream--

Ren: Welcome to all the Marteens, that have arrived in the chat. Martyn, bro. You and--listen. You and me need to have words, Martyn. (three seconds of silence) You know what, cut the music. Cut the music, this is-this is getting serious business now. Zoom in a little bit for dramatic effect. (five seconds of silence)

Ren: Martyn. Bro. (two seconds of silence) I-Why you do me dirty, bro? Eh? What's up? Why you do me dirty like this, bro? (deep inhale) Dear viewers, let me tell you a story. A few days ago. Approximately--you know what, give me one moment, Imma figure out exactly how many days ago. I'm gonna rub the salt in this wound. Mm-mm-mm.

Ren: We're gonna-we're gonna cook this one. Let's see, the twentieth. That's four days ago. Approximately four days ago, I sent a message to Mister Marteen. An important message. A message from the heart. What do I get in return, from Mister Marteen? Crickets. Crickets.

Ren: Give me one second, I need to find a cricket noise. I-I'm not as professional as Martyn, you see. Martyn's got instant access to sound effects because he's a professional. And uh, broadcasting genius. I am uh, you know. A little bit more amateur. Give me one second, guys, I gotta log into Epidemic Sound and everything. It's gonna take a while. Can't remember my password. (keyboard clicking, deep inhale, laughs) Okay, here we go. (keyboard clicking)

(soft cricket noises that sound almost like a fire alarm in the distance play for ten seconds, uninterrupted. In the actual video, this sound plays for twenty-one seconds)

Ren: This is quite a long sample guys, it's two minutes long. Sorry about that. (cricket noises for thirteen seconds. In the actual stream this clip was thirty-five seconds long, and he turned the sound of the crickets up to be louder)

Ren: It's only halfway, guys, you still-still got a while to go. (cricket noises for twelve seconds. In the actual stream this clip was twenty-three seconds long. He then pauses the crickets for four seconds, zooms in on his cubito)

Ren: Pause for dramatic effect. (he starts the crickets again for thirty-five seconds [the full time here and in-stream] before pausing it again)

Ren: That is all I have to say about this matter. Thanks for the raid, Martyn. W-welcome everybody. You joined us right at the start of a trial chamber run. (four seconds of silence, then a fond laugh) And as an update, t-to Marteen-gate. I have received a reply! Hold on, I gotta find another sound effect real quick, one second. One second guys, uh, (keyboard clicking, then the sound of scattered applause and indistinct voices for thirteen seconds)

Ren: I have received a reply from Marteen! (the clip is still going, just indistinct voices) This-this sample is not working for me. (a clip of a motorcycle revving begins to play instead) (flustered laughing) That's n-that sample is not working for me either. Wait, I've got a sample on the stream deck! (applause begins, including happy yelling) I received a reply! (the sample continues to play) (Ren singing) Joy to the world / Marteen has replied! / He has finally / Replied! (deeper voice) After four days. (laughter, normal voice) Thank you for the reply, Marteen. I am very excited. We shall, uh, continue our correspondence, digitally. Upon another platform (laughing under his breath)

Ren: --X-Fandom is here with a gifted sub to Marteen! Ya weren't even subbed?! (silence for four seconds, then decisive keyboard clicking. Then the sound of a cat yowling, which is swiftly replaced by a baby crying for seven seconds, uninterrupted. In the actual stream it is twenty seconds long.) It's quite a long sample, too. Sorry guys. (In the actual clip, the baby continues crying for ten seconds uninterrupted, before Ren laughs over the baby crying, and then pauses it, while this video has only one second pause between baby crying and Ren's laughter) Oh, goodness gracious, I'm having too much fun.

[pisstintedglasses]

Enhypen as fuck buddies !!!

(Only the legal line will be inculded)

─=≡Σ((( つ•̀ω•́)つ─=≡Σ((( つ•̀ω•́)つლ(◉‿◉ ლ)

Heeseung (이희승)

I'm fully convinced Heeseung is a loser but can flirt if he sets his mind to it. Like bro looks like he can't pull bitches but he actually can. At first, he'd be completely tense around you, but after you set your boundaries and he set his, he goes all out. After care as his gf, absolutely wonderful. As just his fuck buddy tho? Man gives you a tissue and that's it.

More under cut

Jay (박종성)

Would totally take you out to eat first before doing the deed. Listen, he fucks you to relieve some stress but that doesn't mean that your pleasure isn't a priority. Bro absolutely spoils you. He totes wouldn't mind dating his fuck buddy. He wears condoms js cuz he's afraid of the consequences, but if you allowed him, he'd def choose to go raw all the time. Aftercare is immaculate too. Need water? He got you. Too tired to get up? He'll clean you up. Hungry after? He'll cook for you or get door dash in advance.

Jake (심재윤)

Ngl... as much as I love Ikeu, if you were just a fuck buddy I feel like he'd be too absorbed in his own pleasure to actually notice yours. Yeah you get off cuz he got a big dick matched with a brutal libido, but still. Would fall in love with his fuck buddy and eventually ask you on a date. Aftercare? Nah dawg its you doing it. Bro clocks out after busting 5 nuts inside of you.

Sunghoon (박성훈)

Very private and very careful. Condoms are always a must. If you're his fuck buddy, he is staying that way. No strings (save for saliva) attached. The moment you give any hint that you want a romantic relationship with him, he's gone. 💨💨. Aftercare is decent. Not as caring as Kay but not as bad as Hee or Jake. He makes up for it for making you feel over the moon every time he uses those hands on you though.

Sunoo (김선우)

GIGGLES. Like literally I feel like Sunoo wouldn't be into fuck buddy tropes. Or maybe yes? The thought of having a secret relationship w someone excited him. (All the other members know about the relationship). Most of the time, he bottoms, but he has these rare urges to top, and you really appreciate it. Yall would be besties before yall decided to venture in a sexual relationship.

Jungwon (양정원)

Gets horny in the riskiest places and cannot keep his hands to himself. Bro would hit you up in the middle of the day and ask if you wanna do it. "Quickie? 🥺🥺🥺" Bro wouldn't mind if you stayed after doing it. He'd be chill with watching a movie or eating take out with you at hjs or your house after sex.

[chosocutegf]

O'Hara with a chubby wife? Like dawg i wanna see him appreciate that chubbiness 😫 plus points she's always soft and kind to him which makes him fall even more

I'm so in love

I LOVE CHUBBY READER ESPECIALLY WHEN IT COMES TO MIGUEL ໒꒰ྀི ∩ ⸝⸝ ∩ ꒱ྀིა

It makes me think about Miguel fawning over you, looking at you from afar because he can’t help but keep his gaze on your plump curves. I think about him sitting on the sofa, while you’re in the kitchen, cooking or something, and he can’t stay focused on whatever he was looking at the tv.

When you turn around and catch him staring, he doesn’t look away. He is not embarrassed that you saw him gawking at you, because he wants you to know that he is obsessed with you. “Ven aquí, mi amor,” (come here, my love) he calls you, a soft smile when he sees you walking towards him with a raised brow.

When you stand before him, he looks up at you with pure love in his eyes, before resting his hands over your full hips and gently tugging you closer, guiding you between his legs. He rests his head on your soft tummy, and nuzzles his face there, sliding his hands under your shirt and pawning gently at your plump waist. He hums when you thread your fingers through his dark locks and closes his eyes as he relaxes against you. “What are you doing?,” you ask softly, laugh in your voice.

He lets out a soft playful groan, burying his face in your tummy before tugging you impossibly closer, almost making you fall if it wasn’t for you placing your hands over his shoulders. You chuckle softly when he mumbles against your shirt, “nothing, mamí, just appreciating you”.

A gasp leaves your lips when he quickly wraps his arms around your legs and moves you to the couch, pushing you to lay down before laying on top of you. You huff softly at his weight, squirming slightly to adjust yourself under him. Miguel groans against youand buries his face between your full breasts, a little smile on his lips at the plumpness of his new makeshift pillow.

“Comfortable?,” you asks teasingly, glancing down at him before wrapping your arms around his broad back and holding him close. He nods slightly against you, nuzzling even closer, “mucho”. (very much) You let out a soft hum before sliding your hand under his baggy shirt, scratching his skin gently.

You feel his grip tighten around you, squishing you under him as he relaxes even more under your touch. Soon after, you feel his breath getting slower and when you glance down, he is asleep. There is a smile on your lips when you reach for the tv control and switch it off.

can you hear me cry? ｡°(°.◜ᯅ◝°)°｡

(m.list)

[mx-anthropy]

People on the Battletech forum are arguing about Clan eugenics programs.

"The Clan eugenics programs make sense if you accept [the rest of the Clans' political ideology"

Yeah dawg, because the rest of their ideology is fucking cooked.

If you accept my assertions that the engine in your car actually has gnomes in it that make your car work, and that they run on itunes vouchers, then giving me a bunch of itunes vouchers to "install in your engine" would make sense too.

I don't know why I'm complaining about this on tumblr but I guess I am just constantly surprised by how completely lacking in critical thinking skills people are.

[monobmp]

Ok I need my Sonic fans to come back because I might be cooking.

So I was listening to Dreams of an Absolution (2014 Remix) and was thinking about how I didn't make a Silver gijinka yet right.

And thinking about his clothes, I figured I should make it winter and the neurons in my brain connected. Sonic could be in summer clothes, Shadow could be in fall/spring... I need to finalize his design tomorrow. Also I tried making his hair work dawg, it's just not feasible, it can't be saved I'm sorry Silver

Also I never got a conclusion to the Sonic design but I might go 2nd just because it fits a little more to the summer theme, though I do wanna keep his car racer look...

[houpss]

Dawg I’m actually begging crying on my knees for you to do a reverse version where like reader dies protecting skz 😭😭😭 ofc obvi no pressure, like only if you’d like to 🙏🏻🩷 you write so well im like obsessed

ububububu.....I'm very pleased to hear this! thanks for the idea, love 🩷🫂

I'm eating strawberries and crying, I literally feel bad about this job 😭😭😭

SKZ's reaction to your death ver. hyung line

maknae line

It pains me to write this work, my heart breaks and I begin to believe in this nonsense... BUT REMEMBER THAT ONLY PERSONALITIES ARE TAKEN FROM THE REAL SKZ, EVERYTHING REST IS FICTION!

Bang Chan

It happened...suddenly.

Chan returned home before you, he wanted to cook you dinner and then turn on a new movie that he recently found.

He knew that you were stuck at work, so he wasn’t too worried.

An hour has passed... you're gone, but you should be back by now. Two hours have passed, Chan is nervous.

He called you, you didn’t pick up, he called you so many times, but you didn’t hear.

At two o'clock in the morning he receives a call on his phone. He jumps out of bed, hoping it's you calling, but it's just an unfamiliar number.

He picks up the phone, he just hopes you're okay.

"Are you Bang Christopher Chan? I'm sorry..Y/N Bang died."

Chan thought it was a joke, a very unfunny joke.

He can only come to consciousness when he sees your body. Road accident, you didn't survive.

He will ask Changbin, Jisung and Hyunjin to come out quite aggressively, because they came with him.

He ran his fingers over your pale face, tears forming in his eyes. Impossible.

He strokes your hair, strokes your hands, stopping at your fingers...he squeezes your hand tightly. Why did you leave him?

Tears fall on your lifeless body, you would be very upset if you saw Chan crying.

They can only drag him out of your room in the morning, he didn’t want to let go of your body until the end, it was like he was possessed.

"No, don't take me...I have to stay with her! I don't want to be taken away from her"

"she’s probably so cold and scared... she’s alone there, she’s already lifeless.”

He blamed himself, he could have taken you away from work, but why didn’t you ask?

The exit from the hospital is filled with reporters and paparazzi, the shocking news shocked many: “Model and Actress, Bang Chan’s wife Y/N Bang died in a car accident.”

Thanks to the members, they protected Chan from reporters and endless paparazzi. Chan did not walk behind as usual, but in the middle, and a ring was created around the participant.

Chan doesn’t remember anything, he just cried, he cries so much and loudly.

The members refused to leave him, although he asked so. They went to the dorm.

A day has passed... two days have passed... a week has passed. Funeral.

He remembers everything very vaguely, he was the last one to kiss your forehead before the coffin lid was closed.

Now he is completely alone.

He eats very little and hardly leaves the room. Minho literally force feeds him.

Your photos are open on his phone, you are on his wallpaper.

He doesn’t want to live without you, he wants you so much.

His tears never dry, he cries constantly. There are no emotions inside him, he is dead.

He looked through your correspondence... his heart ached madly.

He just loves you so much, he loves only you.

He apologized profusely to your family, it was his fault.

In the end he won't cope and he will leave for you. Chan was found hanged in his room. There was a note on the table with the words: “I can’t live without her, I’m nothing without her... forgive me.”

Lee Minho

People come and go. The simple meaning of life

But you couldn't leave him...not you

If you loved, then you would not have left...WHY DID YOU LEAVE HIM?

Overdose of antidepressants.

He found you in your apartment, you were lying on the bed, wrapped in a blanket... you seemed to be sleeping, but your heart was not beating.

What if he had found you earlier?

He would have stopped you.

He found a letter next to you... your last will and love for him

"𝐈'𝐦 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐰𝐞𝐚𝐤...𝐈 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰"

"𝐈 𝐜𝐚𝐧'𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞, 𝐇𝐨"

"𝐈'𝐦 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐈 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐦𝐚𝐝𝐥𝐲. 𝐈𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐛𝐞 𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐦𝐞."

IT'S NOT EASIER WITHOUT YOU

He has been crying for several days in a row. Even the members can't pull it out.

He became so aggressive and closed.

His heart rotted and broke without you

He falls asleep with your sweatshirt on, with your perfume on it.

The company releases a statement that Minho is taking an indefinite hiatus from activities.

He wants to close his eyes, open his eyes and have you next to him.

He went through many treatments with you and visited many psychiatrists.

You smiled at him so much, so what happened?

Minho cried for the first time in front of the members, everyone was broken with your death.

After your death, he smoked for the first time.

The cigarette smoke calmed him down at least a little. And in your dreams you came to him, you talked to him a lot.

He became very closed off to himself, even Jisung couldn’t get him to talk.

Everything and everywhere reminded him of you

Your bottle of perfume...your drawings, your rings, your elastic bands, your sweaters

You would curse if you saw him like this.

Only a month later, after your funeral, he dared to pick up your phone.

To mom, dad and sister: “I’m sorry that I’m so weak.. I would like a better life for you, I wanted to live better and happier. I’m a bad daughter.”

To SKZ:"Sorry...be strong, you are world stars and become even more popular..."

To Minho:"I repent of you, I hate myself for what I did. I have about ten minutes left...And in these ten minutes I will continue to love you, Lee Minho. Maybe we will meet in the next life?"

The emotions he had been holding back burst out.

He screamed, his scream deafening the silence.

Physical pain in his heart pierced him. how the bitch it hurts.

Now he's wearing your big jacket.

“Please protect me, Y/N.”

SEO CHANGBIN

"Police lieutenant Seo Y/N was shot..she died while intercepting a drug gang. The ambulance did not have time to arrive"

What did he just hear? Why are they saying your name?

Is this a mistake? Maybe they got it wrong?

He refused to believe it until he was asked to come to the morgue to identify the body.

Yes, you were lying there...a bullet in the forehead.

Changbin turned away, he couldn’t look at you. He's scared.

Probably then he realized all the pain, he stopped living.

Felix and Seungmin forcibly dragged him away from the morgue.

He was never against your work, he was just proud of you. Of course, his wife is a police lieutenant.

He knew it was dangerous, but could anything bad happen to you?

"Changbin, she died a hero, please...be the same hero for her."

There were so many people at your funeral, why did they all come?

Changbin felt lost, Chan was holding his hand. Changbin couldn't navigate the space.

Time doesn't heal anything, remember.

He lost the desire to exist

He hated your job after your death, it's all your damn job.

Will you protect Changbin? Are you his guardian angel?

From time to time he hears your voice.

He will come to your parents and ask for forgiveness.

Really, forgive him.

He will take your dog with him, it seems... the dog really misses you, where is his owner?

Changbin doesn't like music anymore, he stopped working out, he stopped eating.

"Y/N would be upset if she knew that you wanted to leave the group."

"She told you to create for the sake of people's happiness."

"WITHOUT HER THERE IS NO FUCKING THIS HAPPINESS..."

You would like him to continue writing and working.

He will stay for your sake... and for the sake of the members, these three months they kept him afloat, he literally clung to them.

Your dog now has 8 caring men

Changbin brings red Lilies, your favorite flowers, to your grave every week.

Hwang Hyunjin

You have been married for five years, recently celebrated your anniversary.

You were the happiest couple! STAY blessed couple , the participants were incredibly happy about your couple.

You found out that you are pregnant.

Hyunjin was incredibly happy! Members will become uncles to your baby.

Felix took the place of godfather.

Chan and Minho were responsible for choosing the name.

And Changbin, Jisung, Seungmin and Jeongin made rooms for your baby!

But...you had a back injury, which made it dangerous to give birth.

You didn't care, you were going to have the baby.

Difficulties began immediately during contractions, Hyunjin was with you all the time.

He was forced to leave the room in the middle of labor.

The members who were waiting in the corridor were very worried.

Sudden silence.

The doctor came out of the maternity room and said: “Congratulations, you have a daughter... please accept my condolences, your wife has died.”

What?

It sounded so absurd.

Hyunjin walked into your room, you looked so tired...so sad. sad aphrodite.

Hyunjin kissed your forehead, one hand on your neck, the other holding your hand.

"Thank you for daughter...and forgive me, I love you very much"

Tears rolled down Hyunjin's cheeks, the tears were like pearls.

Hyunjin went home with the members.. The workers left your daughter in the hospital for several days.

Hyunjin seemed to understand nothing, he understood absolutely nothing.

"The baby will grow up in love, Hyunjin"

"We will all take care of her..she is an extension of Y/N" These words from Chan hurt Hyunjin's heart...He will protect and love his daughter.

Hyunjin is always crying, his eyes are red, his face is swollen from crying.

It hurt even more when Seungmin brought your favorite coffee.

In three days we could pick up our daughter.

All eight participants went to the maternity hospital.

They brought out a small package for you, what a tiny little thing.

Hyunjin looked at the little baby as if he were the eighth wonder of the world, the girl was sleeping. Hyunjin could have sworn that she would look like you.

"We'll call her Viyoung" Why is this in tune with Vendetta?

The guy nodded approvingly, tears flowing down his cheeks again.

The members took turns holding the bundle with the baby in their hands.

"I will love you so much, Viyoung...just like your mother loved you."

“Your uncles will take care of you...you will grow up with complete love.”

They went home, everything will be fine. Your memory will never fade away. Hyunjin will raise a beautiful daughter. She's a copy of you, but with Hyunjin's eyes.

[astrobuggy]

!! Tsams/Tlaes headcannons !!

Bc I'm bored 😃👍

○ The Astrals don't bleed

● If the Astrals ever blush, they glow brighter

○ The Astrals can regenerate their body parts if they ever get cut off

● Earth and Pollux have played dress up (with tea, snacks, makeup, and nail polish) once, and Castor walked in (yes, he was dragged to join in the little function, he lost a bit of dignity that day)

○ He may not seem like it, but Castor has developed a sweet tooth while his time on Earth (the planet), so has Pollux, but she's vocal about it

● The astrals don't have a reflection it's just light, flash bang 💥 (Lunar saw this with Gemini, and he couldn't see for a while)

○ Pollux has hello kitty heelys (I got this from someone else btw)

● Lunar is Castors first ever friend (They both got too attached)

○ Castor has abandonment issues (or detattachment issues, idk how to spell it🤷‍♀️)

● Solar drinks black coffee (the strong taste wakes him up)

○ Earth smells like lavender

● Earth and Lunar have a gift exchange every time something terrible happens (which is every single day 😭)

○ Lunars' love language is physical touch, gift giving, and words of affirmation (He has given gifts to Earth, Sun, Moon, Castor, Pollux, and Monty)

● The Astrals can express emotions they just don't know the word of said feelings, so they don't know how it feels and what word links to said emotion (so they think of themselves as expressionless beings)

○ Moon likes Earth cooking and baked treats (he can't get enough dawg 😭🙏)

● Nexus is going through his emo phase

○ Gemini (Castor and Pollux obv) are touch starved (they are a space being who hasn't gotten a hug for the years they've been alive for and are being revealed to touch the first time in their life and once they do they don't know what they're feeling or what it is, btw Lunar was the first one who hugged them)

● Lunar makes it his mission to spend more time with Pollux and Castor

○ Sun smelled like mangos and cherries at the beginning, but that started to fade now he smells like mangos, cleaning supplies, and cats

● Sun had a favorite kid in the daycare (after July 16th, they never showed up again. Wonder where they went!)

○ Dazzles real name was Delilah

● Whenever Jack sees someone eat pumpkin pie he holds himself

○ Castor has heard Lunar say his lovey dovey comments about Gemini, Pollux, and himself, now it's a daily occurrence to him (he glows a bit brighter every time this happens)

● Lunar has written love letters to Gemini, Pollux, and Castor. They're separated, and he writes what he likes about each and every one of them and his favorite moments with them. He doesn't give these to them he hides them away in the closet (Castor knows about them)

○Earth has a plushie collection (she takes care of them like as if they were her kids)

● Earth ice skates and is pretty damn good at it 👌

○ The Gemini twins like to look at Lunars eyes; Pollux is more vocal about while Castor just watches on the side lines, taking a peak once in a while

This was way too damn long 😒 Most of these were the Astrals or Lumini 😭😭 Sorry! I just have more of a preference 😪

[melodic-haze]

Jinhsi is glowing in the game..i for real thought it was a bug or something and then i open twitter and people be saying the same things..how can she looks so goddamn beautiful..Like she can go from all softie to a literal badass woman..i want her so bad.

Imagine we as her lover omg i can't. Jinhsi is a type of lover who caress your face in the morning and put our safety first GAHGH WANT HER SO BAD

☆ — DEMO TRACK: Jinhsi x Reader

☆ — TYPE: SFW

☆ — CONTENT WARNINGS: None :3

☆ — NOTES: I AM SO SORRY??? THIS WAS FROM FUCKING MAY OH MY GOD. I have another ask after that'll tie into this (more specifically, NSFW hcs for her 😊) saur yeah. Anyway GUYS LOOK A SFW DEMO....WOW I swear I'm multifaceted

☆ — PARTS: Part 1 (you are here), Part 2

She is like. Green flags all over idc idc I NEED HER man she's so sweet my baby 😩😩😩 I need her dawg just having this woman as your lover must be like. So nice as long as you accept that she's working with an extremely busy schedule

Even then though I DO think she'd make time for you. She's a very balanced girlie who's learnt how to balance between working and resting, preferrably with you :3

She makes a point to always ALWAYS wake up next to you. I'd say that she's an early riser as well so she probably just lays there on her side, brushing her hand on your face and your body as she waits for you to wake up. Could she just get up and carry on with work? Yes, and perhaps you've even offered that she could bc you KNOW being a magistrate means you're never NOT busy.. but she's always declined, saying that the first thing she wants to see in the morning isn't work but rather the joy on people's faces as a result of her hard work with keeping the peace.......and that is especially the case with seeing you alive and satisfied in her embrace 🥰🥰🥰🥰

The first thing you feel when you wake is a soft kiss on your bare shoulder, the contact warm and tender yet brief.. but then it comes back as quick as it went and you can't help but sigh in contentment as your eyes fluttered open.

The first thing you see is not Jinzhou's magistrate but rather a woman of pure elegance, her seemingly luminescent white hair flowing freely and expectedly unkept after a lovely night (and you could never tell if it was due to her connection with Jué or if it were a natural reflection of the light). Though to you, she was still nothing short of perfect, with the way the morning light had bathed her pale skin with such an ethereal glow.

"Good morning, dearest."

The first thing you hear is the sound of her soft voice, a groggy rasp to its undertone as a result of a good night's sleep with you.

"Mmm.. morning."

That was the only form of verbal exchange the two of you had for a while as you both laid on the bed without any intention of hastily diving back into the real world. You simply turned around to snuggle closer to your gentle lover, your limbs tangled together before you leaned in at the same time.

There it was, the first thing you taste and the first thing you smell being her, all five senses filled with nothing but her. And considering how busy her life is, you wouldn't have your mornings any other way.

You don't actually know how long you've spent there in silence, cradling each other and exchanging tender kisses without a need for words. You don't really care, and neither does your beloved girlfriend despite the responsibilities she has. But of course, you know better than to question her.

You could have stayed there until the end of time but alas, duty does call.. and so do your stomachs for a good meal.

The both of you sit up at the same time, as if attuned to each other, and give each other one more peck before parting.

"I can make something for breakfast," you offered, "though if you need to leave now, then that's fine too."

Jinhsi shook her head, "I have a counter-offer; let me do the cooking this time."

"You sure? You know you don't have to do that."

"Shh," she places a finger on your lips for a moment before dropping her hand, "I want to. You deserve to be treated every once in a while, so let me?"

"..You always convince me, even though it feels like you're wasting your time for me."

"I wouldn't, as you say, 'waste my time' in doing so if I didn't love you."

WIFE MATERIAL WIFE MATERIAL WIFE MATERIAL I LOVE YOU JINHSI

Throughout your day to day basis I feel like she likes to keep tabs on you to make sure you're okay. She isn't oppressive with it, doesn't have anyone directly guarding you and looming over you or stalking you at every direction, bc she knows you can handle yourself and function independently and she doesn't want you thinking she doesn't trust you!!! But she often asks people if they've seen you around and how you're faring. I think at some point, people end up doing it on their own bc they can tell (with much amusement, ESPECIALLY for Changli) how much she cares about you. Even Sanhua makes it a point to report to her if she sees you somewhere HAHAHA

Speaking of Sanhua, considering how you two are tied together then she's also technically your bodyguard by proxy 🫶 so expect to see her a lot. She'd have a soft spot for you as well, starting off bc you make Jinhsi happy but then over timr you'd probably bond anyway (and Jinhsi's cheery ab having her two precious people get along :3)

She also sends you gifts if she can't see you for the day or a certain period of time. A random courier delivers it to you personally with a knowing smile on their face and you're usually surprised with how it's either something you've wanted for a while now, something you thought about today as you passed by a certain store, or just something that she says in a note reminded her of you 🫠🫠🫠UGH I'M SO LONELY

Ofc being in a relationship with Jinzhou's magistrate also means suffering the downsides aka being basically the prime target for anything that may source as a way to get to Jinhsi with more.. hostile means. Doesn't necessarily happen much bc she takes safety SERIOUSLY but ofc it does happen. Not to mention in general as well, with all the tacet fields popping up left and right

She wants to be able to protect you 24/7 but she does know constant protection would suffocate anyone, with the way she's able to essentially assign the fiercest most intimidating people to basically surround you. But she does try, if not by having others to do so then by herself

Watching Jinhsi fight felt like nothing short of an ongoing art piece painted onto a canvas.

She was unfazed, unbothered and ever so graceful—her sword cuts through the Tacet Discords so cleanly as she executed each one without so much as breaking a sweat. Despite the chaotic conflict, however, it felt as if she were simply dancing through each Discord with their shrieks and screams as her very own orchestrated accompaniment.

..What a morbid thought, though your lover still seems to make it seem like a beautiful visage anyway.

The two of you had only wanted to venture beyond Jinzhou's city walls for a nice picnic, but of course the risk of encountering random dangers had caught up to you, hence the situation.

You knew you wouldn't have to wait for long though—and you say that with such jarring nonchalance because a situation like this is more than some random nuisance, except you have the Sentinel's blessed willingly protecting you—because Jinshi's making short work on the Discords like they're nothing. As expected, of course, though there was that valid twinge of fear mixing within your excitement and awe at her power and her fighting prowess.

A blink, and the final Discord falls to her sword, the metal of her blade echoing out a metallic, reasonating sound that announces the battle's finality. And with it, the Echoes of the last Discord she had felled is stood there, sparkling a glittering gold.

She looks back at you with a concentrated glare, the horns on her head and the aura surrounding her signifying the final fragments of her silent aggression, before she blinks out of her state and reverts back to the seemingly docile woman that you spend your days with.

The white-haired woman licked her lips before speaking, her gaze darting from you to the still Echo, "A see-through visage of you would make for a nice anniversary gift, no?"

You snorted, walking over to her now that the field's been cleared, "Are you implying that you'll kill me so that I end up like the Echo there?"

"Goodness, no! The Echo's presence simply sparked an idea within me." She laughs despite the fight she had just gone through, and the sound couldn't be more musical to your ears, "I simply want to immortalise your memory, perhaps with my presence as a cameo?"

"Even though you're arguably the more important public figure out of the two of us? Why not just have us together, on equal standing?"

"..Why, that possibility had slipped my mind. Perhaps I'm not thinking straight."

"Really?"

"Mhm."

"You must be winded, then... How about we find a spot to sit for our picnic, and then you can rest all you like? I did promise Sanhua that I'll have you back relaxed, unhurt and in one piece."

She raised an eyebrow mirthfully, "I still think she should have been more worried about you. I can take care of myself, as you've seen."

"Yeah, well-- ..wait, do you think she'd chew me out for having you fight for me?"

Jinhsi simply gives you a cheeky grin as she walks off, the playful expression a rare view on the Magistrate.. but extremely beautiful nonetheless. And you are left to chase after her, the both of you giggling as you stride through the now-peaceful plains.

And the whole thing has you thinking, that perhaps there is a more.. convenient way of immortalising your bond together, without a need for artificial Echoes or transparent tributes.

All you'd need is a ring.

And maybe better accompaniment instead of the screams of her enemies.

Idk how I ended up with a proposal teaser I'm ngl tk you what the fuck LMAOOO this is what happens when I don't plan anything. Contrary to popular belief I think marriage is a scam but this isn't about me 🫶

Dating Jinshi's obvs not gonna be sunshine and flowers with the risk and how busy she is bc she's leading an entire region, but surprisingly it's pretty close :3

[harmoniouseclipse]

Woe fankids be upon ye

Doing a little series where I took some ship requests on my instagram to make them fankids, this one is for me tho (jeanlisa to kick it off whoo 🙌🏻) The lineup so far is Cytham, Kavetham, Lionfish (aka Freminet x Gaming aged up probably idk how old they are canonically), Cynonari, Jealuc, and Beiguang, and feel free to send me some other pairings you wanna see (as long as they are legal pls otherwise I will ignore it 👎)

I'm gonna ramble about some headcanons and lore for them under the cut, continue with caution bc I'm insane

These two are my brainrot rn, don't even joke lad. And I wanna tell yall their name meanings too bc I like them a lot 🥹 Zephra's means "west wind" derived from Greek, and it's the feminine version of Zephyr. Tyrian was a type of purple dye used by the Ancient Phoenicians, huge huge HUGE thanks to my pookie bear @miothefish for helping me out with his name!!! Also he has Lisa's butterfly earring and you can't see bc of the angle but Zephra has the rose that went in her hair holding her ponytail <3

I'm also making a massive family tree for the characters as a go along, and just the jeanlisa tree is taking up half of the canvas bc of the KoF and Sumeru characters since Cyno is their uncle and the rest of the gang are their honorary uncles 😭 I'll be posting that once the series is done/all the requests are finished/I run out of ships and otps I enjoy

Here's an alternative version with some more info on most of the characters I wanted to briefly mention in their relation to them; Tyrian likes calling Eula his aunt too even though she was never really considered one for them so it's kind of like her unofficial title she pretends to dislike but she loves it and dotes on Tyrian 🤭 She and Diluc also helped train Zephra with a claymore and Diluc kind of became a parental figure to her in her teen years after Lisa's passing 🥺 She also feels like she's outshined by Jean and that she's not smart or powerful enough to follow in Lisa's footsteps (something that Lisa wouldn't want anyways bc it led her to her death 😔) rip zephra she's just like me fr

And yeah some Kaeya angst bc he's still going thru it I fear, and Jean is single mombossing but she's worried for zephra which me too dawg, im afraid to say she might be cooked 😦 Zephra is also kind of like a weird mix of Lisa when she was her age and Jean, where overall she's well-mannered and kind but she can be competitive and feel the need to push herself too much and pull a few strings to get what she wants from time to time. Tyrian is a ray of sunshine tho, he has not yet witnessed the horrors 💔 I do think that Jean is also a lot easier on him than her mom was with her so that also helps. He's very shy tho and wants to stick with Zephra or Razor most of the time, and they both have some nasty tan lines from going out with Razor and Klee and Fischl a lot 😔 Cyno also freaking loves them and dotes on them and Tyrian is getting a TCG addiction because of it smh, Cyno is also one of Zephra's favorite people and when she's in Sumeru she stays with him and Alhaitham (bc in my universe they are married ough I love cytham)

And (I think?) Klee physically and mentally ages slower than humans so I think she'd be technically 9 or 10, and Zephra is left with babysitting duty most of the time if she's home on break or smth 😭 Klee really looks up to her tho

Also, I wrote Tyrian's last bullet point like he was super young when Lisa died, but I think he was around 7 so he actually remembers Lisa better than I intended it to sound, he was just younger than Zephra (who was 11 at the time) and just didn't have as much time with her as Zeph did, but his most fond memory of Lisa was reading with her and she probably taught them some potion-making skills too.

I think there will be some abyss angst in here too at some point, since I hc Lisa to be probably an Abyss Lector/Harold (I forget which is which) um so thinking that Zeph and Tyrian experiencing some not normal things happening and Jean doesn't know what to do since Lisa also didn't really know what that dog in her was until it was too late 😔 That's what Kaeya's for tho since he's like the heir of the abyss???? Go off king. Also some touchy ragbros angst bc Kaeya is scared for Zeph knowing how close she is with Luc and he doesn't want him to push her away because of her being from the abyss or smth (they mostly made up but it's still a fear in Kaeya's mind both for him and Jean's kids)

I think that's all I wanted to touch on for now?? Mainly just thinking about domestic fluff and angst all the time now 🥺 Zeph not being able to be open with Jean bc she feels like a disappointment but Jean would literally actually die for her and shes proud of her no matter what ough im going to lose my freak dawg guess who my favorite fankid is it's super hard ik

Send me asks or dms or whatever for more ship requests!!! I'm having so much fun with this dawg 🫶🏻

[das-a-kirby-blog]

alright, this goes out to you guys. just gonna build off of this post

(THIS IS ALL JUST MY OPINION, NOT FACT!)

soooo I think the reason there are so many contrasting headcanons is not only because of the open interpretations the games leave, but because of what kinds of kirby media people are introduced to at first. you got the main games, the anime, the mangas, the light novels, etc. which. wow that's a lot of material you can build on. AND CONSIDERING THE AMOUT OF LORE EACH OF THESE TOPICS ARE COOKING???? DAWG WH

and I GUESS I can understand why some hcs are so bizarre in other people's eyes. but the way this fandom handles those different headcanons is...a lil bad.

YES I KNOW THIS ISN'T SPECIFIC TO THE KIRBY FANDOM, but the whole reason why I'm making this is to at least understand why people take it so close to heart.

and. not calling anyone out. but I do see quite a lot of posts with people (critiquing? complaining?) about how popular headcanons "ruin" the fandom (and this goes with ships too, but I'll get into that later) and all I gotta ask is

does it really??? does it really ruin the fandom?

I'm just gonna say. no. it doesn't.

you are focusing on a small percentage out of...oh idk...AN ENTIRE FANBASE? at LEAST open up a little and find a new circle if it is bothering you that much. or better yet. BLOCK! filter out tags!

with the amout of differing kirby medias, please understand that there will be headcanons that will oppose yours and that's okay! just don't be a jerk about it!

--

NOW. with the ships. specifically metadede. gonna try to put my overwhelming bias aside for this one I promise.

though metadede is the most popular ship in the fandom, it still comes with it's critics. and some are. actually valid! such as their relationship doesn't immediately have to be romantic. it can be seen as platonic! and I can understand why people feel that way.

but things get sour when people immediately try to crap on it because in their eyes, and correct me if I'm wrong here, metadede overshadows every other ship in the fandom. you hardly get to hear about their rarepair because of how metadede is everywhere.

if you take a step back and really look. there is a reason it is so popular. because of the LARGE amounts of media they have together. in the games. in the mangas. in smash. in official art. I mean if you wanna count the anime go ahead.

what I'm trying to say here is that compared to any other character interactions, meta knight and dedede are definitely up there for the most interaction in the franchise. and I'm not trying to downplay any rarepairs or other ships with a smaller fanbase.

BUT DON'T BLAME THE SHIPPERS! they are only doing the same as anyone else, they are going off of what they are given by canon and simply building off of that.

though, because I am a metadede shipper myself, you can take this segment with a grain of salt.

---

in conclusion...people can have their different takes. and that's okay! having different opinions is what builds this fandom and draws the attention of so many. but please! do not take any of these takes personal!

If there is a point in here you would like to argue against or build on, feel free to do so. I'm open to any other views.

[heymrspatel]

✨✨weekly tag wednesday✨✨

i was tagged by @deedala @lingy910y @mybrainismelted @creepkinginc and @energievie 💙💙💙

name: julissa 🧚🏻‍♀️

age: a fresh 34

astrological sign: ♉🐂

upon which continent do you reside: north america

tell us how you're feeling right now using 3-5 emojis:🥱💻😧🍅💙

whats your favorite flavor of gum? i'm more of a peppermint altoids girl! but a basic spearmint would be my go to!

whats the last movie you watched? uuuh i think it was "the idea of you" (milk carton hug my beloved)

what was your worst subject in high school? chemistry 🙄

whats the job you stayed at for the shortest period of time? i worked at a fancy luggage store for like a month. it was terrible. do not recommend.

whats your favorite thing to do at an amusement park? rollercoasters! hhhhweeee!!!!

what condiments go on top of the perfect hot dog (meat or plant-based)? oh a ny style haht dawg with the works!

cincinnati chili, thoughts? i didn't even know this was a thing asldkfj sorry deanna!

do you sleep with a plushie? i do! i have three bears lol 🐻

how do you feel about thunderstorms? love them unless they feel super close, you know what i mean? big fan of the far away rumblings and light show. just stay over there.

what's the last animal you touched? my nephew, moon 🌙

grab the nearest item with words on it that ISNT a book and tell me the final word: "pollinators" - it's a packet of wildflower seeds lol

have you ever forgotten to do an assignment until the night before its due? yuuuupppp but i always whipped them up and cooked them good! 👩🏻‍🍳

i'll tag @whatthebodygraspsnot @metalheadmickey @whatwouldmickeydo @gallawitchxx @gardenerian @crossmydna @mmmichyyy @vintagelacerosette @sleepyheadgallavich @sleepyfacetoughguy @iansw0rld @darlingian @sgtmickeyslaughter @jrooc @blue-disco-lights @spookygingerr @mickeysgaymom @michellemisfit @jademickian @ardent-fox @sickness-health-all-that-shit @too-schoolforcool if you would like to play! if not, this is just me giving you a little leaf 🍃

[idyllicbarb]

not impressed

SUMMARY: in your eyes, nothing is special about the lsu quarterback.

WARNINGS: cussing, drinking, smoking, fuckboy!joe, fratboy!joe, cocky!joe, euphoria inspired

- - - -

You're new to LSU, transferring from a small community college back in Georgia. It's only been a few months here in Louisiana for you but things have been good so far. Joining the majorette team and becoming popular around campus. Men want you but you don't want them, too caught up in enjoying your new college life.

You adjust your bra top, gaining looks from a few college boys that were standing around you. Rolling your eyes, you check your phone for any new messages. Somebody at LSU decided to throw a party for the football team, typical. Your majorette teammate, Naomi, had dragged you out the house so you could find yourself a man just for the evening.

But all the dudes at the party right now were either weird or sluts, huge whore bags. That's how a lot of men on campus are, especially the football team. You never understood how girls would just flock to them, only seeing dick and a potential to become a NFL wife. Shit like that never amused you, you have big dreams too, who wants to be cooped up in a house all day with three to four kids plus having to cook and clean? Yeah no.

Naomi walks back in the living room from using the bathroom, re-joining you on the couch, "You okay?" She asks. Before you can answer her, a loud group of men enter the house and you just know it's the football team.

You roll your eyes before sending a knowing look Naomi's way, she laughs silently before scooting closer to you. "I'm fine, this party is about to give me a headache though," You mutter and Naomi hums in response, "Well, we can always go back to the dorm."

"No, no, I never go out and I want to. It's college, we're supposed to be having a good time." You say in response. Justin and Ja'Marr walk in the living room, giving daps to people they know before heading over to you and Naomi.

You may have not cared for the football team but you've grown fond of Justin and Ja'Marr. They're like two bad ass twins. Ja'Marr shoves your forehead making you slap his wrist in response, "You asshole!"

"We ain't know y'all was coming. Especially you, Y/N, you an old lady, you probably got old people teeth in ya mouth right now." Justin teases gaining a laugh from out of Ja'Marr.

"Don't push it, I'll flick your little ass." You push Justin back slightly with your foot. He fakes a hiss before laughing again, "Stop playing before I get my boy, Joseph on yo ass."

"Ooh! See me personally, Y/N, I would never go for that." Ja'Marr shrugs his shoulders.

"You go for that and then some, Ja'Marr," Naomi rebuttals making you laugh. He sucks his teeth before tapping Justin on the shoulder, they both walk off weirdly.

"Losers," You mumble under your breath and Naomi giggles at your comment. A few seconds they return with the hottest topic on campus, Joe Burrow.

"Keep messing with us and our dawg Joey B gon Mickey Mouse two-piece y'all ass," Justin says and you look over at Naomi before the both of y'all bust out in laughter.

"Y'all weak, I can beat y'all up, easily, light weight." You reply standing up but only to get softly pushed back on the couch by Joe.

"You haven't even seen me fight."

"Well first off, I wasn't speaking to you, but since you opened your mouth, I don't need to see you fight. You look like you'd get beat up." You tell Joe, gaining attention from a few of his friends and teammates.

"Joe you gon' let her talk to you like that?" You hear somebody ask from the kitchen. You stand up getting in Joe's face, "He sure is, because "Joe" isn't going to do a got damn thing to me."

Joe turns his attention over at you as Justin and Ja'Marr slowly back away from the scene. "It'd be best if you watch your mouth."

"Is that suppose to be a threat?" You question while about to to take off your shoes. Naomi stands up and grabs your hand, leading you upstairs into a random empty bedroom.

"Girl! You can't be talking to Joe like that." Naomi blurts out and you turn your head at her. "Y'all scared of him or something? He doesn't faze me."

"Nobody disrespects him-

"How was I disrespecting him by telling him the truth? Do you seriously think he'd win a fight?" You tilt your head meeting Naomi's eyes, she looks away attempting not to answer.

"Exactly, just because he's known doesn't mean anything to me. You should know this by now."

Fixing your hair in your pocket mirror, you catch Naomi staring at you. "What?"

"You know he's going to be on your ass now, right?"

You look at Naomi, "No, no, I don't know, enlighten me."

"He's just like the big guy around here and everyone just respects him. You might be the only person who treated Joe like he's a regular human being," Naomi stated.

"He is a regular human being!"

- - - -

You're currently sitting on top of the kitchen counter drinking some jungle juice. After you and Naomi's conversation, you both decided to rejoin the party. You gained a few looks from people who are believed to be close friends of Joe. You don't care though, you weren't going to treat Joe as if he's superior because in your eyes, he's not.

Joe walks in the kitchen with a woman on his arm, she stumbles over her feet before putting her head down when a few people snicker. You shake your head, turning your attention back to your phone.

"You look lonely," The three words make you snap your head at a man who looks drunk out his mind.

"I look completely fine, do you?"

Joe moves past the two of you, mumbling, "Shouldn't you be anywhere but here?" under his breath. You laugh quietly before focusing your attention back on the dude in front of you.

Before the dude can even reply to your question, Joe taps him on the shoulder and the two of them walk off somewhere. You roll your eyes, waiting on Naomi to get done flirting with whatever man she can have for the night.

This party is lame, and you're two seconds away from beating thee infamous Joe Burrow up. Such a prick! Getting mad at you for not playing with him. Such a dweeb in your eyes.

Justin and Ja'Marr slide next to you, "Yo!"

You laugh before sitting up straight, "I haven't seen you two all night. Must've been getting pussy."

Ja'Marr shrugs playfully before looking away, letting you know that he indeed, got pussy during this party. "That ain't the topic, what needs to be talked about is you and our boy, Joe."

"What about him?"

Justin scoffs, "What about him? You can't be talking to him like that! He big dawg. We was tryin' put y'all on with each other, but you damn near punked him in front of his folks!"

"Justin's right. He coulda had you drooling for him at any moment." Ja'Marr adds in his two cents making you squint your eyes at the both of them.

"Ain't he a fuckboy? He's a blunt, passed around!" You loudly say making people snap their head in your direction.

"Nah! Nah! Don't be saying that." Justin puts a hand over your mouth when Joe appears back in the kitchen.

"Who a fuckboy?" He asks, the whole time he's staring directly at you. Joe knows you said it, he just wants to hear the words come from you. But you can't because Ja'Marr is currently trying to make up some kind of lie.

"See, you gon' get yourself caught up, Y/N. Real shit, Joe don't play them games." Justin tells you before mushing you back softly.

"Fuck yo' teammate who is also your friend, respectfully."

- - - - -

"Wanna take a swim?" A frat boy asks you, you nod your head slowly stripping off your clothes and placing them near Naomi's belongings.

You grab the dudes hand and walk towards the pool, people staring at the both of you murmuring words under their breath.

Joe and his teammates are smoking cigars when he sees you stepping into the pool, "Just what the fuck are you doing?"

You snap your eyes over at him, "You see I'm in the pool, cunt." People start oohing and Joe's face turns red. Never has a woman disrespected him constantly.

His teammate, Tyler, taps Joe on his shoulder, "You gon' have to handle that." Joe's friends murmur words in agreement. He peers his over at you again, watching you attract people with the way you're moving your body.

"Yeah, you right. I can't take the disrespect for too long."

"If I didn't know any better, I'd say you like the girl, Joseph." A child-hood friend of Joe's, Derrick, says. Joe hears a few people agree with his friend, sucking his teeth, Joe flicks Derrick off.

- - - - -

The party is slowly coming to an end and you're grabbing all of your belongings when suddenly Joe walks up to you. "You know, it's very disrespectful to call somebody a cunt.

"Hm, am I suppose to care?"

"No.. but I-

"Exactly, I knew you weren't slow! Have a good night.. Mr. Burrow." You give Joe a fake smile, walking off to your car with Naomi trailing behind you. Joe can't help to grin, his first time ever being told off by a woman. He's impressed but you're not.

"I think he's definitely into you," Naomi mumbles once you two reach your car. You hum, not really thinking too much into the thought. Maybe, maybe, Joe might have a crush on you. But who cares, certainly not you,  right?

[buggitino]

more headcanons about sebastian solace from the hit game pressure roblox

back on my bullshit and i promise i only talk about The Situation a little bit

☆ his third arm is more sensitive than the other two (i'm thinking that either the USHD doctors fucked something up during the operation OR it grew in wrong, nerve endings closer to the epidermis and whatnot, something like that)

☆ just hates being touched in general, he’d rather initiate that contact (need an update where he gently —> not very gently shakes expendables off (depending on whether and how much they’ve annoyed/flashbanged him) when they climb him) ☆☆ part of this is due to trauma, he cant trust anyone to touch him without hurting him ☆☆ the other part is that he’s got that fucking dawg in him (i’ll get to this in a second)

☆ unlike what his new voice lines are starting to suggest about his character (i’m not gonna talk about zerum again because i think everyone knows what's happening at this point and ive already thrown in my two cents) he does NOT hate the expendables. literally his first line upon meeting him in his shop has him calling himself your friend (as strained of a connection as it may be, he could very easily not offer items, not share documentation/info, and just take the expendables data and hoard anything he picks up to make it harder for them to get to the crystal) (like yes, it's a mutually beneficial relationship but if sebastian didn't care about or sympathize with the expendables to some extent, it wouldn't be). i really do think he just has a short fuse (i'm not going to bring up trauma again, however-) and says things he doesn't mean (e.g. “they deserved it. and frankly so do the rest of you.” (im coping with the mischaracterization of these new lines leave me alone)) as a means of protecting himself and pushing the expendables further away (both physically and emotionally)

☆ he’ll act like a brat once they’re done, but he lets younger expendables sleep in his shop (he cares about them but would never in a million years let them know that) ☆☆ if a younger one comes in with a bunch of adult expendables, he’ll treat them all the same but will secretly slip the younger one some extra batteries, gauze, something unnoticeable (he feels especially responsible for the younger male expendables cause they remind him of his little brother)

☆ sometimes he thinks he can hear his family's voices on the radio, just under all the static, calling out for him like a search party would. he used to cry over this but he almost got caught once by an expendable coming into the shop so he does his best to tune it out. it’s hard. guilt pulls at his stomach every time he hears a clip of his family, begging for him to come home, to respond, something, anything, and he ignores it.

☆ autism (cause i said so) - i'm including this one for the sole reason that he does the dinosaur thing with his third arm and generally keeps his hands clasped together in the secret dinosaur position (he just like me fr) ☆☆ hates bright lights (the only light he uses/allows in his shop is the one he emits) (its a very soft/warm hue as opposed to the bright fluorescents throughout the rest of the facility) (not to bring up the flash beacon, obviously nobody likes getting flashbanged and he's got angler eyes but sTILL)

☆ he used to hate eating fish (pre-op) and now he’s pissed cause it’s all he has available and the DNA changes made it so fish is the yummiest tastiest thing in the world (i like imagining him actively fighting the urge to eat whatever fish he’s cooked in one bite cause he refuses to acknowledge that he's changed on a level that isn't physical/appearance-based)

☆ calls grown adults “kiddo” (even the ones that are older than him) ☆☆ he gets a certain kind of joy from seeing the 40/50/60 year old expendables try to figure out just how old he is after they get called “kiddo”. it’s extra fun for him when they’ve clearly already heard the rumors and/or gotten a glimpse of his file

☆ the ring is just an accessory, a bracelet on the floor or in a locker he found and liked. assumed nobody was gonna claim it and kept it (shoutout to @/lotus.eaterr on tik tok for this one!!!!)