#i'm sorry i just had to

[iwasbored777]

This made me laugh so hard stop 😭😭😭

She said that in the most normal way possible

[unhinged-nymph]

🔔 Just Married 💍

[asexual-pancakes]

'Murica

[deepdonutkid]

I discovered people in the fandom complaining about how unrealistic Haffie is. Well, yeah, I kinda agree with that. The canon book characters don't go that well together, but I can imagine two scenarios, where I could picture them together:

Fuckbuddies- duuuuuh, Haymitch is so unfitting for a relationship in almost every aspect, but he still has some game. Everytime he is in the Capitol for some business or Effie is in D12 they spend some time together, mainly because they are bored. But it would be interesting, to get some one sided jealosy in the mix.

And this is a bit of a far strech but hang in there...An AU where Effie tries to stay in D12 permanently after Katniss, Peeta and Haymitch come back home, because she feels like she isn't welcomed in the Capitol anymore. She was part of the Games, most of the escorts, beauty teams and stylists have been killed, and now she is one of the few people left. Effie notices strange looks from every corner and decides she can't take it anymore. So, she goes to the people who she thinks, actually liked her for herself. After her arrival, she knocks at Haymitch's door and asks him, if she could stay a while. A few days later, Haymitch asks her, when she will go back again, she declines and explains why. Haymitch says: "Well, it won't be easy making a life here" and Effie says: "Teach me then" and after that it's basically like a 2000 feel-good teen movie, where the rich posh girl is moved to the country side and at first she hates every second of it, but while the romance progresses, she admits to herself, she likes it in a way she never expected. And the main concept of this story would be comedy, sweet simple slice of life comedy with just a pinch of romance, because we don't wanna overdo it. Write at 2am for about three hours and we are good to go... E Voilá a mouth-watering Haffie story!

Just imagine Effie trying to help Haymitch with his geese, while Peeta and Katniss are watching from their kitchen window and decide: "Well, that's definitely not our problem."

Or there is no hot water yet and Effie demanding a bath after a long day of work. So Haymitch and her keep filling up his tub with warm water from the stove. Once it's done, Effie undresses herself and gets in the tub. She is finally relaxing and... Haymitch comes in, wearing just a towel and wants to join in, just to prank her.

"Well, sweetheart, what did you thought... I would put in all this work just for you?", he asked her, rubbing his stubbly chin with dirt-covered fingers. She- still wrapped in her arms for protection from his keen looks- retorted: "Actually... yes." But she couldn't interpret his reaction. Haymitch was shaking his head as the smile on his lips turned into a grin and then into a big laughter. "You expect me to", he started and had to pause right then, because he couldn't contain himself. "You expect me to bath in your cold water." His voice was much colder now, since he stopped laughing. It was almost unsettingly calm now. Effie didn't know where to look. She gulped just thinking about him standing there half naked. Usually, she liked being seen. That's why she joined the Games as an escort. In a family of six, with four sisters, she was rarely noticed. Overlooked, most of the time. And while she was there on stage in her meticulously composed outfits, she was adore and admired by the masses. But that didn't last. Now, every pair of eyes set on her, was one pair too much. Especially his. His grey eyes pierced her soul and shattered her like she was glass. She blinked and looked up to him. "I thought, you were being nice. I really tried my best today and I already had such a hard time setting in." "A lots of Is in there... I thought, I tried, I had. Don't you think you're being a bit self-centered here? Since you came to me and asked me for help, I assumed you changed. Guess I was wrong about that." He was already at the doorstep, when Effie called for him. "Wait, Haymitch... I'm sorry. Please come back, I'm sure we find a way to share this tub." With a grin he turned around, rolling his eyes. "For a second, I believed you left me hanging." The towel flew down from his hips. A whince left Effie's mouth. She didn't know where to look, but only realized she kept staring, when Haymitch scoffed: "My eyes are up here, darling."

[peterlorres21stcentury]

I am sorry but I cannot contain myself, I must comment on this one thing and one thing only and then I will stop

This essay. Again from my former foe, whom I tease with impunity now only because she has, purposefully or not, deleted all her media in an apparent attempt to slink away into the ether. But oh, this is why I donate to the Internet Archive each year.

This essay is short and feels entirely unfinished, and it bothers me. It equates Peter's beauty with thinness; a thinness that was a forced product of Hollywood standards and wasn't wholly natural to him. It seems to disparage his perfectly normal human appetite. It screams "tell me you have an eating disorder without saying you have an eating disorder." It contains this howler of a statement:

Food, like prescription narcotics and cigarettes, was a needful part of the ecosystem that made Peter Lorre happen.

Oh really, you don't say. Surely food isn't a core necessity for all life on Earth, you absolute noodle. Not only that but food, and I mean good food, a genuine enjoyment of food as a celebration of life, is central to much of Jewish culture too. Which tells me you know nothing of that, either.

Such enjoyment is certainly central to ME, also a secular Jew like Peter, at any rate. If taking pleasure in food makes one a "fresser" (glutton) then I am one too (and I know full well than I am, and I don't apologize for it).

[taonpest]

[canisalbus]

The forbidden smooth Machete.

A lot of his head is just fluff, without it he's even more noodly than usual.

[cha-melodius]

Gray Catbird by Kristy Brig, ML609429271

[egophiliac]

roll out the red carpet guys we're going to the SHAFTLANDS

[nouverx]

Pov the cannibal overlords are judging your outfit (or discussing how they're going to cook you tonight, your choice 👀)

Based on very cool outfits for them I saw on twitter! Here's Alastor and here's Rosie

[not-so-rosyyy]

they keep baiting her but she said:

[itsthislake]

“Icarus.”

it's all about freedom really

Credit goes to An Sifakah for the poem. Enjoy!

Support me on Ko-fi maybe?

[crystallizedtwilight]

Do lock shock and barrel ever do that thing where after you go clothes shopping you do a little fashion show to your friends to show off the new clothes? Also would shocks girlfriend join?

No fashion shows but we have noticed we've been looking...cooler lately 😎

[blakbonnet]

and it's strange all the things that I've run from, are the things that completeness could come from

[canisalbus]

✦ Barbenheimer ✦