#i'm sorry people keep trying to convince me that finn was a good guy and i just don't see it

[casspurrjoybell-27]

Claimed by the Beast - Chapter 10b

*Warning Adult Content*

Feed the Demons - Part 2

- Knox -

Knox leaves before he says the wrong thing again and Everett convinces him to stay.

Long forgotten memories with Scar bubble toward the surface of Knox's mind as he marches to the main room.

The guy was a good fuck, very nice to look at and had a wicked sense of humor but if what Finn said is true, then none of that gives him a pass for crossing the line with Everett.

Knox doesn't have the patience or time for petty games from past fuck buddies with a jealousy trait and if Scar has a problem with that, then he can consider this his last visit to the clubhouse.

"Come with me."

Knox makes eye contact with Finn and Scar after entering the main room.

They follow him without asking questions and Knox stops in a deserted hallway nearby.

"From each of you, I want to hear what happened."

"What happened with what?" Scar asks, leaning back against the wall and looking bored.

Finn nudges him hard in the side, glaring at him.

"Oh. You mean what happened with the baby earlier? I don't fucking know. One minute he was fine, then the next he wasn't. For the record, I didn't do shit."

"Liar. Everything was cool until you showed up," Finn mutters, retelling the whole story from start to finish. "And then he started shaking and crying and shit. I didn't know what to do, so I held him until you eventually showed up."

"Maybe the kid doesn't do well when in confrontational situations," Scar adds.

"He didn't start freaking out until after Finn got in my face. As if I wouldn't snap his ass in two."

Scar rolls his eyes when Finn whispers something threatening under his breath.

"If anything, it's Finn's fault, not mine."

Knox was tempted to slap sense into them both but he maintains his composure instead, just barely.

"From now on, you're to act like Everett doesn't exist," Knox says, looking directly at Scar. "What you and I had is in the past. Everett is mine now. I claimed him. Therefore, his problems are now my problems and you already know how I feel about having to stop and deal with stupid shit like this, so kill the fucking games. I won't warn you a second time."

Scar smiles at the threat, stepping forward to place his palms on Knox's bare chest.

He licks his lips before whispering in a sensual tone.

"I'm sorry, big daddy. I didn't mean to upset your new pet."

He lowers one hand down Knox's body, daring to taunt the angry giant.

"I'll do anything to earn your forgiveness..."

"Did you not hear a word I just said?" Knox snaps, gripping Scar by the neck and slamming him hard against the wall.

"Keep testing me, Lucas. Keep fucking trying me and I swear to God..."

"Hey, man. If you're gonna kill him, maybe uh... do it someplace other than the hallway where anyone can see?" Finn cautiously intervenes and it's then that Knox notices Scar's face is now blue. "Come on, bro. What if your boy walks by and sees this?"

Knox releases Scar, taking several steps back.

"Get the fuck out of here."

The man scurries off without another smart remark, coughing and gasping for air.

Knox redirects his attention back to Finn, making him stand tall despite the immense amount of fear glowing in his eyes.

"You need to be more careful around Everett," Knox says in a lighter tone. "I still don't know which of you set him off but you starting fights with people in front of him isn't helping shit either. The last time he saw you like that, he ended up covered in blood and holding Shaun's dead body. See where I'm going with this?"

Finn nods, looking apologetic.

"Is he doing any better?"

"He's fine now."

"So, uh, are you officially off the market now?"

Knox makes a face.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?"

"I'm just saying..." Finn shrugs, smirking mischievously. "You took everyone by surprise when you claimed the kid and now you almost killed Scar for potentially triggering him into a panic attack. Seems like you two have gotten pretty close..."I wish you fuckers would stop saying that and learn to mind your own damn business for once."

Knox stomps off, ignoring Finn's fading laughter.

When he makes it back to his bedroom, he finds Everett nestled underneath the covers watching a movie.

He glances at the screen where a couple is holding hands and walking through a park, an upbeat pop song playing in the background.

Knox immediately laughs.

"Is this...?"

"Yes, it's a romcom."

Everett rolls his eyes.

He turns the covers down on the bed and pats the empty spot beside him.

"Get in and keep quiet."

Knox kicks off his jeans and happily obliges.

"Is this what we're doing for the rest of the night? Sitting through hours of cringe and cliche fairy-tales?"

"Shutting your brain off and watching a feel-good movie where you pretend to be the main character sounds like a great time to me, Mr. Debbie Downer," Everett says, keeping his eyes on the screen. "Do you have something better to do?"

Knox smirks, stealing a peek at Everett's beautiful profile.

Even if he did have something better to do, Knox wouldn't choose it over the moment that's happening now.

"I'm all yours, kitten," Knox says, getting comfortable. "Now, what's this sappy ass movie about?" 

[ponyregrets]

i wish you would write a fic where... bellamy is a serious dater and clarke is only into random hookups when they meet, like he's a romantic and she's basically a stereotypical frat boy

AO3!

"You know what the problem is with casual sex?" Clarke asks, flopping down on the couch next to Bellamy with a sigh.

"Having to google people from the bathroom at the bar before you take them home to make sure they won't murder you?" he offers without hesitation. "Hell, having to find people at bars to hook up with?"

"You pick up people at bars too," she points out. When they first started living together, Clarke had thought their wildly divergent takes on relationships might be a source of friction. She doesn't care what other people do in their personal lives, but people who are really into dating and monogamy can get pretty judgey about people who favor casual sex, and Bellamy gave off pretty generally judgmental vibes.

Luckily, it turned out he didn't have anything against sleeping around, he'd just gotten it out of his system in college, when Clarke was convinced she was going to marry first Finn and then Lexa. Once both those relationships blew up in her face, she figured she might as well take a step back from trying to find a long-term relationship and just have fun.

Five years later, she's still having fun. At least, most of the time.

"Yeah, but not as often, if I'm lucky. Besides," he adds, with a teasing grin, "I figured if I said lack of emotional connection and empty orgasms, you'd get mad at me."

"No, that's closer," she admits, ignoring his teasing for the moment. "Not the emptiness, but the orgasms. Or lack thereof."

He snorts. "I told you that guy looked like a douchebag."

"I wish everyone who looked like a douchebag was bad in bed, but you really can't tell. Sometimes they're smug because they're really, really good. Like you, I hope."

"Thanks for giving me the benefit of the doubt."

"Any time you want to prove it, feel free."

He shakes his head, still smiling. She can never tell if he thinks she's joking or not, but all he ever has to do is ask. Bellamy's hot, and she would absolutely fuck him in about half a second, if he wanted to. "I don't want to ruin you for other men. That would really reduce your dating pool."

"Very considerate of you."

"You could try fucking someone other more than once, then you could have good sex regularly."

"I still get plenty of good sex regularly. And a relationship isn't a guarantee of good sex."

"No, but at least you can have a conversation about it. Or you should be able to. I know the last time you dated someone long-term was college, but when you're an adult, you can just tell your partners that they're bad at oral."

"Really?" she asks, unable to keep a dubious note out of her voice. "How's that gone for you?"

"Okay, you don't say exactly that. But I've dated some people who don't give head how I like, and they've taken feedback. And then they get better. With just one night, you don't see a lot of improvement, even if you bring it up."

"I don't know if anyone takes you've never given a girl an orgasm well, as feedback."

"Yeah, I've never tried that one."

"Weird."

"Sorry the douche didn't get you off. And sorry I'm better at judging whether or not guys are good at sex on sight than you are."

She snorts. "I don't think we can say that."

He shrugs. "I'm just saying, I took one look at that guy and knew he was going to suck in bed."

"Yeah, brag about it." She lets out a long sigh. "You sure you don't want to fuck me?"

"Not tonight, sorry."

"Then I'm going to go fuck myself and go to bed."

It's the kind of thing that should be weird, but Bellamy just gestures over his shoulder, half wave and half salute. "Enjoy."

If she's thinking about him and not any of the attractive strangers she's fucked lately when she gets herself off, that's her business. No one else has to know.

*

"I wouldn't fuck that guy," Bellamy says, three weeks later, while the guy Clarke has been flirting with is in the bathroom.

"I don't think he'd fuck you either, he seems straight."

He ignores her. "I bet you five bucks he doesn't make you come if you go home with him."

"Huh." She thinks it over. "I don't know if I'm going home with him yet. And that's a shitty deal for me."

"How so?"

"Not only do I not get off, but I lose five bucks?"

He snorts. "Sorry, did you want to put your money on your date being bad in bed? I figured you were betting on them by default."

It's a valid point. "Fine, if I go home with him and he doesn't get me off, I'll give you five bucks."

He offers his hand and the two of them shake on it, and by the time the guy gets back, Bellamy's melted into the crowd. It's something he learned to do early in their friendship, and Clarke's grateful; even the densest potential hookups manage to pick up on how much more she likes her roommate than them.

She lets the guy take her home, and she gets a cab back from his place after. Bellamy's on the couch playing video games, as he always is. The first few times, he made excuses, but once they got to know each other better, he admitted it was a nervous thing. He grew up taking care of his baby sister, and he couldn't ever sleep while she was out. He has to wait until everyone is home and the door is bolted before he can go to sleep, so Clarke never stays out too late.

She hands him a five dollar bill without a word, and he puts his arm around her and gives her a squeeze. "Sorry I was right."

"If you were really sorry, you'd five me back the five bucks."

He smirks and pockets the money. "Guess I'm not really that sorry."

*

"What about him?" Clarke asks, pointing to a guy with dirty blonde hair and a nice smile. Bellamy has won three bets in a row, so she's pretty sure she has some kind of gift.

"I'm starting to think you just have really shitty taste in guys," he says, cocking his head. "That guy?"

"I'm not going to marry him."

"You're also not going to get off with him."

Raven looks between the two of them with raised eyebrows. "Did I miss something?"

"Bellamy's got an eye," says Clarke.

"I've got two eyes," he says. "I'm getting another round, you two want one?"

They both agree, and Raven fixes Clarke with a hard look once he's gone. "Are you guys getting weirder?"

"Probably."

"You should just fuck him."

"I keep trying, but he keeps saying no."

"Okay, yeah, you should tell him you want to marry him."

"If he won't fuck me, why would he marry me?"

Raven groans. "You're going to give me gray hair. What's he got an eye for?"

"Guys who can give me an orgasm."

Her head hits the booth with a light thunk. "Seriously, Clarke."

"He's good at it! I don't want to waste my time."

"You say that, but you've been in love with your roommate for like six months and haven't done anything about it."

Clarke feels her entire body stiffen, her blood running cold and then hot. "I'm not in love with him."

"No?"

"No."

Raven regards her with her too-shrewd eyes.  "I know the Finn thing did a number on you. On both of us. And the Lexa thing right after…" She sighs. "I'm not saying I don't get it. But you've got yourself convinced that because he won't sleep with you, he doesn't want you, and it's fucking stupid. How many times does he have to tell you he's done with casual sex before you figure out what you need to ask is if he wants to date you, not if he wants to sleep with you?"

Clarke opens and closes her mouth. "We live together," she finally says.

"A lot of people who are dating do, yeah."

Bellamy comes back with drinks before Clarke has to say anything to that, and after that she spots a girl with a nose ring and a pan flag pin on her bag ordering a drink at the bar, so that's her evening sorted out.

No need to think more about Bellamy at all.

*

Clarke isn't opposed to being in love, not really. She still thinks she wants to be, someday, but it's a vague, unformed someday, the same way it always has been. She's not even thirty yet, she doesn't need to settle down. Bellamy is allowed to be ready for that, but that doesn't mean he wants to do it with her. He's never given any indication he did.

But he's been single for a while now, and he's not exactly wanting for interested partners. Maybe no one's been appealing, but maybe Raven's right, and if she asked him, he'd say yes.

Just the thought of it fills her head with cotton and static, turns her stomach to butterflies and bile. 

It's too much to think about, so she doesn't.

*

Clarke's feelings on marriage aren't universal, nor does she expect them to be. But it's still a little weird that people she knows, people her age, not only want to get married but are getting married. No matter how often she asks Monty how he knew he was ready, he hasn't come up with an answer that really makes sense to her. He just fell in love and asked Bellamy's friend Miller to marry him, and Clarke is grateful for it, because Bellamy needed a roommate and that's how she met him.

Still, Monty and Miller's actual wedding is a lot to process. It's not the first wedding she's gone to of a peer, but the others have been acquaintances, not friends. This feels like the start of a new era in her life, the one with spouses and kids and mortgages, and it's no wonder that Clarke decides she needs to get very drunk. Especially since Bellamy is the best man, so not only is he looking stupidly hot in his tuxedo, but he seems to be everywhere, organizing everything, and Clarke's always been kind of into competence. Even if she misses having him to hang out with.

He finally finds her during the reception, sinking into Harper's empty seat with an audible sigh of relief. "Holy fuck, weddings are a pain."

She doesn't want to perk up when she sees him, but it's inevitable. "Hi!"

He squints at her, then he grins. "Open bar, huh?"

"You're behind," she says, sliding her drink to him. "I know you don't want to think about what this means either."

He accepts the glass and takes a long swig. "What what means, exactly?"

"Our friends are getting married."

"God forbid I think about our friends being happy, yeah."

"You want to get married," she says, trying not to make it sound like an accusation and not really succeeding.

He smiles. "In general, yeah. Is that a problem now?"

"It's just weird. It's going to happen more and more. Your sister's going to do it, and Raven, and…I need another drink."

"Wait until I finish this one," he says. "I finally get to hang out with you, don't just leave."

It's hard to argue with that. "You did a good job. Very best manly."

"Thanks, that was the goal." He's watching the dance floor. "As long as all the weddings are like this, I'll be happy."

"What do you mean?"

He takes another long drink. "The first wedding I ever went to was my mom's. When she married my sister's dad. I was five and I already knew it wasn't going to last. They didn't even like each other that much. Maybe Miller and Monty won't last forever either, but they're starting from a good place. It's nice. I'll go to as many weddings as our friends want, as long as they look at each other like that."

"You're such a romantic," she says, all fondness, and he finishes off her drink.

"That's me. Let's get another round."

It takes two more drinks before it feels like a good idea to ask him to dance, and he doesn't say anything for a long, horrible moment that feels like a thousand years. 

But then he smiles and stands. "Yeah, we can dance."

His hand is big and warm as he helps her up, and his eyes are deep and dark, impossible to look away from. It really sucks, how pretty his eyes are, because brown eyes are so common, but no one else's can compare. It used to just be that she couldn't hook up with guys with black hair, but brown eyes are out now too. Pretty soon it's just going to be all guys, period, and then probably girls with black hair and brown eyes, an endless slippery slope. It's inevitable.

They haven't even had sex, and he's still ruining other guys for him.

She slides her arms around his neck and relaxes into him, and he leans his head on her hair. It's the high-school prom kind of dancing, slowly turning in place to music, nostalgic in the best way. 

"You going to fall asleep on me?" Bellamy asks, his voice a pleasant rumble against her chest.

"Probably not. But I know you'll bring me home if I do."

A faster song comes on next, and that wakes her up. Monty and Miller come over too, then some of their other friends, Raven and her new girl, Bellamy's sister and her giant boyfriend, and it becomes a real party again, everyone laughing and jumping around and drinking even more.

The night gets hazy from there, but never so hazy that she loses track of what's happening. She knows that she keeps dancing slow dances with Bellamy, and that she's looking at his mouth a lot, and that he's stuck to her side like glue. She knows the whole night feels alive with possibility, and she knows, as she follows him into the cab home, that she's going to kiss him when they get back.

She's not drunk, she's not out of control; she knows she pulls him down and kisses him in the kitchen, and she knows he kisses back. He takes control, after a second, pushing her against the door, kissing her hot and wet, open-mouthed and greedy, and she's pulling him as close as she can, greedy for it, sliding her hands under his shirt, trying to get more and more and--

"Fuck," he says, pulling back, his breathing heavy, his hair a mess. "Yeah," she agrees, trying to pull him in again, but he steps away, taking himself out of her space.

"Clarke, we can't."

"Why not?"

"We live together. It would be awkward."

"It doesn't have to be."

He smiles with half his mouth. "It would be. Sorry, I don't fuck roommates."

"But you want to." 

She hates how needy it comes out, hates even more the way Bellamy's face twists, how his facade of good humor cracks, showing something ugly underneath. "Jesus, is that what you want to hear? That I want you? Fuck, Clarke, of course I want you. Every fucking time, I want you. I want to give you the best sex of your life and wake up with you and--" He cuts himself off, looking away. "And I'm drunk and I'm going to bed. Sorry," he finishes, a sort of general statement without a clear antecedent, and leaves before she's collected herself enough to say anything.

She's still against the door, so it's easy to let her head drop back, the pain of the impact barely even registering. "Fuck."

*

His door is closed when she gets up in the morning, and it's still closed once she's had her coffee and some cereal. She showers, and when she gets out, the door is still closed.

For all she knows, he's not even in there. He usually gets up before her, he might have gone somewhere to avoid her. Miller is headed for his honeymoon, but Octavia would let him come over and mope on her couch, if that's what he needs. 

But he never closes his door during the day. Even when he's gone, the door is open. It's impossible not to read into that. And if she doesn't talk to him soon, she's going to crawl out of her skin.

She gives him until ten-thirty, and then she pushes the door open without bothering to knock. He's on his bed in his usual sleepwear, just a pair of flannel pajama pants, and he has a book open on his face. He looks like a cartoon character, albeit a miserable one.

He has no visible reaction to her coming in, but somehow, she's sure he's awake. If she knows him, and she's pretty sure she does, he was trying to read, but he couldn't stop thinking about how he screwed up last night, and now he's obsessing over what he could have done differently, how he could have done better.

Just like that, the knot of tension in her stomach undoes itself. She climbs into bed next to him, settling with her arms around his neck, her head on his shoulder.

"You really didn't need to apologize. I should have. I'm the one who jumped you."

"You did," he agrees. "You want to apologize?"

The book is still on his face; he's her favorite person in the world. "Not for kissing you. But I was wrong."

"About what?"

She closes her eyes, breathing him in. He didn't shower last night or this morning, and he hasn't brushed his teeth yet. He smells a little stale, if she's honest, but she's not going to let that stop her. "I thought if you didn't want to have sex with me, it meant you didn't want me at all. I figured if you were interested, you'd fuck me. But it was the other way around, right?"

"I don't fuck roommates," he says, a pointed non-answer, and Clarke's whole heart bursts.

"Okay, but do you live with girlfriends?"

He finally moves the book to look at her. "Clarke."

"What?" He doesn't actually seem to have a follow up, so she props herself up on his chest. "I stopped hooking up with guys with black hair. Then brown eyes. Glasses are out too. Every time I compare someone to you, they come up short. And I thought if we had sex, maybe you'd like it and want to do it more."

He slides his hand into her hair, gentle, his smile mostly fond and only a little exasperated. "You don't date. I'm not going to be the asshole who pressures someone into a relationship they don't want."

"I get it." Her eyes flick down to his lips. "I want it," she says, and that's all he needs. The hand in her hair tugs her down, back to him, and they're kissing again, less desperate than last night, sweet and warm and slow until she ruins it laughing against his neck.

"What?" he asks, nuzzling her temple.

"You need to brush your teeth, sorry."

He laughs too. "Wow. Romantic."

"I love you," she tells him. "And I'm going to be here when you get back. But seriously, brush your teeth, Bellamy."

His grin is the brightest she's ever seen. "Well," he says, pushing her off him gently so he can get up. "If you love me."

*

"See, that's the nice thing about a relationship," Bellamy says, kissing her hair as she curls around him. As promised, he's very, very good at orgasms, and managed to live up to her expectations for not only his dick, but his hands and his mouth too. Exceeded expectations, even.

"Cuddling after?"

"That too. But you couldn't have told a random one-night stand to brush his teeth first."

She blames the endorphins for the giggles that overtake her. "I probably would have been too drunk to notice during a one-night stand."

"Is that supposed to be an argument in your favor? Because that's not wowing me."

"It's not in my favor, I'm not really on team one-night stand anymore."

"Yeah?" he asks, his voice a little too casual. "You're really good with that?"

She kisses his shoulder. "It's not like it was a religion. I had fun. I don't want to get married tomorrow or anything. But I'm pretty excited to try being in love again. It's pretty great, so far."

He tugs her closer. "Yeah. I think we're going to like it."

[zathuraroy5]

So I finally finished @striving-artist / @caitymschmidt first book, Hunters, just in time for the second one, and here are my screaming/chaotic thoughts on it. I literally just wrote what went through my brain while I was reading, so. Here it is, with no context to my brain vomit but with definite spoilers.

SPOILERS

(I can't find the way to do a keep reading on mobile)

(p.s. re-reading this for typos was WILD, once you know the story you just shake your head at your innocent self)

Chap 1-3

It's painful because Jac has experienced what we all at one point wanted to experience, us dreamers and writers and artists. She went to this magical world and became a hero, but then she had to come back to what is a subjectively shitty place. Earth and humanity has some good in it, but right now we're seeing the dark places and people in positions of power, and it's scary and we feel useless. She had power, but was told it wasn't real, and has to deal with feeling so weak compared to what she thinks (knows) she can be. The chant of "not real not real not real" just hits too close to home sometimes. Just the next cup of coffee for the next shitty day. (For those who never experienced depression, that's one way of living it)

Also more on the details, I really hate mister doctor Finn, not only is he an ass but there's something more going on that I can't pin point but I know will be a catalyst for something later on. I also have a feeling he's the one talking to her at the end of the prologue and idk how I feel about that.

Mom and brother are trying their best, poor them.

Chap 4-5

Omg I didn't even see the difference between them because I was reading so fast. Doctor guy is still an ass, but I'm more and more convinced that he either has been himself in another world and is being a dick so that she'll break and then she'll believe him, or that he knows it's real and is trying to undo 10 years of suppression, but for that he thinks he needs to be an ass or she won't believe him.

This can't be fun for her, I don't want to be her brain right now.

Chap 6

Trying to write as I read.

Ouch that talk with her mom. Sometimes, there's no "getting better". There's just living with what you were given.

He's SUCH an ass, omg. What the FUCK is he playing at.

Chap 7

Jac darling you'll be fine.

No no, it was real, damn it Jac.

So opened doors can let her feel magic?

Ooo after three weeks she's finally going?? Aaaaa omg omg

Chap 8

I FUCKING KNEW IT

he's still an asshole

GO JAC KICK HIS ASS

Goddamit I knew there was more to him. He still didn't have to be an ass about it tho.

At least she won't be alone, I was kinda scared of that

Well that was a trip

Chap 9

I'M SORRY ARE WE ON FINN POV NOW????

Dick

I like how he still hasn't put together that she actually didn't believe what happened to her was real and thinks she was lying to him about being a wonderer. Like bitch, you can tell she doesn't know anything, and you're still treating her like shit.

I have a bad feeling Braora will be scorched.... If three months was three years ish, idk what will have happened in ten years... Won't be home anymore

Poor her, she can't even trust that it's real.

Chap 10

Chapter 10 is fun, I love world hoping. He's still an ass. I don't think he fully realizes what he did to her. At least she's finally living again.

Ooo he's starting to see he's getting her bad side. Cause you're an ass, idiot.

Nothing short of something immediately life threatening where they save each other will make them at least respect the other. They're too stuck in their first impression of the other. (Present me talking, I love how fucking on the ball I was with my theories)

Oooo dragon talk, love a good dragon talk. I could talk about dragons all day.

But why the hell did nobody teach her anything? Was Braora so backwater that they didn't know about Wandering? Cause I feel she would have overheard conversations about it. And I don't think Jolen would put her in harms way like that.

So confusing

I don't know what to feel about the Kal guy. I'm scared something changed and they're gonna be in trouble.

Chap 11

Oooo Finn is starting to lose it a bit. Not caring about one person, uh? Ya sure.

What the hell did you do to make them mad at you. One second you're glad for their influence, the other you're ready to throw it all away.

Follow your instincts Jac, I don't trust Kal.

so it's been almost a week now and i haven't been able to keep reading because i know Strife and i know her writing and i know a bomb will be dropped on the characters soon and i can't right now lol

So two weeks later, two days before book 2 launch, I'm back at it.

Oh Finn darling, I'm not excited to see your face when you learn that your friend is bad now.

Oh god shit hit the fan real fast.

Oh she's gonna be so mad when she learns he can open gates

Chap 12

Ahhh, tales of friendship born of hardship. Can't wait for them to individually realize the other isn't that bad, then catching that thought and denying it like there's no tomorrow.

He may be an asshole, but at least she didn't let him die. Will he at least thank her? Only the future knows.

"needed to keep his assets close to hand" omG Finn, trying so hard to not care about her

All an all, good character growth chap

Chap 13

I'm surprised they hadn't bumped into Hunters before this, holy shit

"it wasn't fondness growing, it was practicality" jAC

HOBBITS

LOL they both thought the other wasn't ready for violence yet. Wow guys

Chap 14

Nice little break chap, memories and talking.

Still boggles me how much he underestimates her while at the same time judging her for not knowing enough or not piecing together information THAT SHE JUST DOESN'T HAVE. Like you can't treat her like an incompetent while at the same time expecting her to know the same things you do while have proof multiple times that she did not have the same education.

And her stubborness can't let her see past her old education into realizing that she isn't the best shit around and is missing major pieces. (I'm glad that later she realizes why Finn kept calling her a child)

No asking questions, and no information given between the two that isn't pulled throught their teeth. They WILL die if this keeps going. COMMUNICATE DAMN IT.

Chap 15

Well Peregrins were useful. What the hell did he do?

Oh Finn darling if you don't deal with the crap soon you're gonna get both of you killed

Chap 16

Finn really needs to stop overestimating his influence.

Ah, I had a feeling it was the gates. Nothing else was the same otherwise.

Mmmmm as nice as it is I'm not sure I trust Fasavi? What is she buttering her up for? (She wasn't that bad tho, except for the end now I'm scared)

Man what the hell happened? Whatever Finn did, I don't think it's actually as bad as what is now being circulated.

Chap 17

I really don't think Finn realizes what kind of mess he's in.

Ah, a little typical there Finn, thinking you know what's better for someone than the person themselves. All she has lived with you for now has been chase and fight and run, and I don't think you realize that you can't go back either. They aren't gonna get over it in a few months. Your old happy place is gone too.

Ooooo shiiit JAAAQQ.

Something had to give I guess, holy shit.

Chap 18

Ah well, I guess she couldn't remember the beginning of her first trip because her brain blocked it out. Well fuck.

Also Finn doesn't think she left him on purpose and I'm????? Ouch

Oh shit poisoned

Chap 19

Oooohhhh she has the time piece. (Or did Finn fry it???)

Smart girl. Go save him and get some answers.

Chap 20

I KNEW IT. FUCKING KAL

IT'S WORSE THAN I THOUGHT

I had a feeling he was the leader but to seep magic out of mages??

Chap 21

Well that's risky

Oh God oh god they keep promising her Braora and she has such dreams but I'm just .. I'm sure it's scorched... And I have a feeling that's were the mage daggers are from???

Well Sir lieutenant general is a prick.

OK NOW I KNOW I SAID HE'S AN ASSHOLE BUT COME ON

I will say tho I think it's pretty funny that she thinks he isn't betraying anybody while in his mind he would do anything to stop the pain.

I KNEW IT I KNEW IT THE BLADE CAME FROM BRAORA OMGGG

Chap 22

What the FUCK are Maerans

HE WAS ON CORELLAR THIS WHOLE TIME

Omg please don't kill Thor?

Chap 23

SHE CALLED HIM A FRIEND I'm so proud

Fucking Order

SHE DID IT SHE DID IT

Oh no she didn't tell him??? That's gonna be a bitch when he finds out.

WHY A FLASHBACK NOW

Oh god when she died :(((

Chap 24

Uh oh

Fun battle

Chap 25

Omg HIDING WOUNDS FROM HER, jesus

HOW THE FUCK DID SHE GET HIS BOOK!!!

WTF HAPPENED TO BRAORA

WTF IS THAT ENDING??????? NOOOOO

fucking Kal

Why am I hoping Finn's not dead now what

What the HELL, either everything changed after the war, or it was somehow already like that and it was an illusion? How the hell did she not feel the sickness? SO MANY QUESTIONS.

So here you go darling.

[sometimesrosy]

Good morning, Rosy! I would like you to sum up your opinion on Finn Collins. You mentioned you liked Flakrke at first, but then changed your mind. Why? I saw Finn as a kind of tragical hero - he was the only one who tried to draw some lessons from the nuclear holocaust and search for non-violent solution of Grounder-Skycrew conflict. He was forced to kill a Reaper in selfdefence. Not shoot him, but smash his skull with stone.

From the moment when he was frantically trying to wash blood from his hands started his trauma. Than he was kidnapped with Clarke, Anya sent him to be killed, he helped with the defence of dropship, ran into fight to save Bellamy, survived ring of fire, was captured by Tristan and saw his friends slaughtered… And then Clarke and others vanished! He had every reason to think they were taken by Grounders So he went on quest to save them. And under all this pressure he cracked and in a moment of panic murdered 18 unarmed people… I read a comment by army vet that this is how it is in real war - people crack under stress and commit war crime. And then Finn gave himself up to torture by Grounders to save his friends who were ready to fight and die for him. He died with a kiss from girl he loved and by her hand. “Thank you, princess”. And the thing with Raven? He did not “cheat” on her, he met some [i left off the last ask, because i have to limit it to 3 or it’s too much for me.]

I am not mad at Finn for falling in love with Clarke when he was with Raven. But I’m gonna argue with you about that cheating thing, because he pursued Clarke in the dropship, when he was SUPPOSED to be having a visit WITH Raven. She knew something was wrong because her visit with him was cancelled, because they’d sent the dropship down. Therefore those events happened at the same time. You don’t hit on another girl when you’re supposed to be on a date with your girlfriend. Yes they didn’t have sex until he thought Raven was lost to him, but everything that developed their relationship and made Clarke fall in love with him was when he was still together with Raven in his head, and certainly in hers. This is not in itself enough to make me not like Finn. And even then, when I first watched it, I was like, “oh how sad. This is a terrible situation they’re all in, to fall in love with someone new while you are still with someone else.”

My mistrust of Finn’s character came in retrospect, when I started to look at his behavior through what happens next. (AND NO I DON’T MEAN THE MASSACRE. I UNDERSTAND TRAUMA.)  Finn’s treatment of everyone at the dropship was rather sinister. He presented himself as Clarke’s hero again and again, to the point that he would try to remove her own agency so that he could be her savior. He also tried to undermine both Bellamy AND Clarke, so that he could, again, be the hero.

 He also showed a distinct lack of concern for everyone at the drop ship, except Clarke. He was sneaky. He refused to share the bunker stash with the rest of the dropship, and in a world where people don’t have clothes, blankets, supplies of any kind or anything to help them survive, that can be the difference between life and death. This is not a “nothing.” He wanted to keep the advantage for HIMSELF, and not incidentally, keep Clarke beholden to him for his gifts, and treating her as more special than the others. Making her complicit in his secret. Because she’s not like the others. 

Holy Crap. That’s the same thing that Lxa did at TonDC. Saved Clarke while leaving the rest of her people to their own fate, and making Clarke complicit in it, but at a much lower level. Honestly, that’s how you go down dark roads. You take the small steps that don’t seem so bad, it’s just a little bit of clothing, some pencils, a bunker, tech supplies…it’s not EVIL to keep it to yourself. But it’s the same instinct that saves “the special one” and leaves the others to die, when taken to the extreme. It started the path of gray morality. But Clarke doesn’t keep the secret of the bunker for long, maybe because she discovers that Finn was not quite as honorable as he seemed. Clarke seems to see behind the facade with him. His sweet behavior, motivated by selfishness. This is in contrast to Bellamy’s bad behavior, motivated by selflessness. Finn and Bellamy are definitely foils to each other in season 1. As we begin to understand the real motivation of each character, our understanding of them switches.

And as Clarke starts to value Bellamy more, Finn goes behind Clarke and Bellamy’s back to force her hand on those peace talks. And I don’t believe that he would have done that at all, if Clarke hadn’t put her trust in Bellamy. He needed to undermine Bellamy so Clarke would turn back to him. And he already knew of her high ideals. He wanted to keep Bellamy as the villain so he could be the hero, instead of realizing that they were all on the same side, and working with them all to figure out a better solution. 

People always misunderstand the reasons why I don’t like Finn. It’s not the cheating. It’s not the massacre when he was losing it. It’s the way he tried to manipulate Clarke, the way he sold out the other delinquents on a regular basis. The way he tried to keep the delinquents divided, so Clarke would be on HIS side. When he sacrificed himself to the grounders, that was actually him REDEEMING himself for wanting to leave Mel and Jasper to die, and withholding from the delinquents.

His quest was not at all about the missing 100. It was only about Clarke. Because as I interpret it, he had fixated on her as being his princess. And that made HIM the hero. He had a hero complex. He needed to save the girl he loved, and he needed to keep her dependent on him, and to do that, he needed to keep her weak and undercut her confidence in herself. Questioning her decisions and judgement on a pretty regular basis. Watch his treatment of Clarke. He isn’t sweet. Or he is, but most of his sweetness is to make her feel as if she owes him something. As if HE is the only one who can give her things or rescue her. As if HE should be the most important person in her life, screw everyone else. Because look what he would do for HER.

And if you think about it, this is the same relationship he had with Raven, who was a neglected and abused kid and he was the knight in shining armor coming to save her, support her, create her, literally feed her, save her life. 

Two women. Two hero complexes. Two women who are better, stronger, and smarter than him. Two women he tried to make dependent on him. One of whom he succeeded with, and then dumped, when he found his next focus. But Clarke wasn’t needy. No matter how he tried to make her need him. She never did. 

[clairen45]

Hey, fantastic job with your metas! I don't know if you've already posted a thorough article on what you expect or think IX will be, but I'd love to read what you have to say about the probable storyline you think is going to happen; personally, I'm having a hard time believing the Reylo arc can be completed in just another movie, let alone the arcs of the three trilogies; what would be left for the next trilogy they're already working on? What do you think? Tks again!

Dear Anon,

thank you for being so encouraging, it is always nice to hear! And thanks for the ask. It took me a little while to answer you (sorry about that) because I was wondering what I could really tell you. I usually try to avoid speculations because, well, I would not say it is my forte, I am not the best at making bets… And, honestly, there is a lot of stuff that could go whatever… BUT…. There are some things I think we can count on, and some things we may expect. And some others (not necessarily groundbreaking) that we could also see them explore or hint at, when looking at the material they have given us so far. Again, I will not bet on anything…Disclaimer, guys!

What we can count on:

Ben’s redemption (yep), last Skywalker standing, guys…. This is my final world, and I have no doubt about that. 

More Force bonds. Because they are awesome!

Reylo as endgame. So…Reylo kiss/ Reylo sex (don’t expect porn, you guys, a lot of great fanfic readers are very kindly providing that)… Probably off screen then (but a girl can dream on something tactful and romantic, the kids will be watching so obviously…)

TFA was Kylo and Rey fighting each other… TLJ is them fighting together. Episode IX should be them fighting for each other… You can’t convince me otherwise.

The MF… It has been key in the ST… Home… Bringing Ben home, or Rey and Ben leaving together at the end. Or Ben piloting the Falcon to do something important…

New saber for Rey… duh

A coup by Hux. Obviously. Rabid cur anyone? Division among the First Order.

Brace yourself: death of our heroes. One or the two of them. Litteral death of one of them, but the other resurrects it through love and use of the Force. Or symbolic death of one or the two of them, through imagery or suspense (we think they are dead but they are not). This is classic myth/fairy tale. It has to happen for them to complete their growth and journey. There is no other way around it. But it can happen many different ways… Don’t fret. I am expecting them to be alive and well at the end.

Balance of the Force… see the quotation from Journal of the Whills: grey Jedi.

Overarching theme for the saga and ST: “you win by saving what you love, not killing what you hate”/ Fairy tale morale/ Dante’s Divine Comedy… Need I say more?

What we can logically expect (as a continuation, or because they have hinted at it, or because that is what they do)

Porgs!!!! Anything with eggs, nesting… too many aviary and bird references in the ST movies and novelizations to overlook

Maz Kenata.. playing some part… or just a cameo. Or finally delivering some answer or advice…

Battles… with ships… in space. And on land… LOL

Leia’s death and/or funeral… Except if they recast her, but oh well… Han’s funeral was in the novelization for TLJ. We need a funeral anyways in the last installment. Padmé in the PT, Vader in the OT… We are bound to get a funeral in the ST. Leia seems like the logical choice. Multiple possibilities: fairly early on, and then you have Kylo trying to show up or sharing with Rey after it and it can play a part in bringing them together. Or at the end, and it is the funeral that brings the galaxy together and it helps everyone mourn their lost and loved ones. Padmé’s was the funeral that marked the end of unity, Leia’s could be the one that brings everyone together. With Rey and Kylo together behind the coffin, or putting a torch to the pyre, hand in hand, as chief mourners.

Division in the Resistance? As a parallel to the First Order’s inner divisions? Would seem logical. I could see Poe struggle as a leader. Or Rey not being comfortable with everything about the Resistance, especially when it comes to Kylo. Rey still needs to figure out where she belongs… She belongs with Kylo. So, she might have issues finding her place in the Resistance. Just as he will not be happy with the First Order as seen by Hux.

Stormtrooper rising. They have focused more on the extra material about the human face of the Empire. See Claudia Gray’s Lost Stars, and the Junior novelization of TFA. Deleted scene of TLJ. Yes, Finn might not just be a bug in the system, it may be the first sign of more to come. Along with the division within the First Order, there may be stormtroopers rebelling and deciding between Kylo and Hux. Plus it gives Finn the chance to shine bright as the one who reaches out to dissident stormtroopers.

Use of the Jedi texts: they can’t have been stolen for no reason.

More FinnRose.

Kylo as good leader/benevolent emperor.

A Force ghost. I wonder if we will get a ROTJ type of ending with all our ghosts gently beaming… Or if they will just pop in to comment Rey and/or Kylo’s actions. We had them in the OT obviously. Not so much in the PT where Qui-Gon could have made an appearance/apparition… It is actually weird he didn’t but maybe Liam Neeson was not interested, who knows?

The ending should be on a lush planet. To symbolize rebirth, renewal, fertility, and the return to Paradise. And as a counterpoint to the ending of PT on Mustafar/Hell.

We might have the return of other known systems, Naboo or Mustafar, but I would really love to see Chandrila featured. It has been heavily featured in the extra material for the ST: in Last Shot, Leia Princess of Alderaan, and Aftermath series. We have seen Jakku, Rey’s birthplace, it would be logical and expected to see Chandrila, birthplace of Kylo. Also, don’t you think it eerily looks like Earth?

A nod to Padmé is overdue. Poor Padmé. Her part was already butchered in the PT. She is vaguely alluded to in the OT… It would be nice to see her somewhere in the ST. Extra material has been alluding and hinting at her…

Someone finding about Rey and Kylo’s force bond and special relationship and being shocked. I am imagining Rose or Finn. Either they keep her secret but call her out on it. Or they betray her secret, for her own good as they see it, and that prompts Rey to dramatically choose to defend Kylo. I have a head canon on BB8 playing a part in all that (catching them during a meeting and playing the holo of their tryst, for example… LOL)

Something that I desperately want to see but am unsure of… the overdue “I’ll come back for you sweetheart, I promise”, that is SO overdue and that is so important in the novelization of the movies, especially in the TLJ Junior version. I think I will pass out from excitement if I finally hear Kylo utter that line (which I deeply believe in).

THAT scene from Rey’s Force vision in TFA. Because, WTF, JJ, you started that now you finish it!

So possibly the elusive Knights of Ren?

Ok, I am sure I am forgetting some stuff. But, this is my piece for now. I hope that answers your questions. Please let me know your thoughts… Sorry it took so long! As for your question about completing it in one movie, well… @taule was telling me that she had heard people speculating they might make more… I would love it, of course, but they did say that ix was supposed to wrap up and tie in the whole Skywalker saga… Do not worry anyways,  because you can count on books, novels, comics, and animation to keep Kylo, Rey, and all their buddies alive and well for quite a while. I am predicting LOTS, TONS OF Kylo’s stuff once they are done with ix and can finally stop pretending about the redemption and survival of their character.

@raven-maiden, @toawaterfowl, @lightaroundthecorner My elves accepted to finally open one letter and get their act together to answer an anon that has been nice all year! LOL

[sometimesrosy]

I'm thinking that as our love for Bellamy grew and expanded into a ferocious thing as a fandom, our likewise inversely proportional dislike for Finn grew too because he had a higher and higher bar to reach he could never reach as each episode went by. It's easiest to see in fanfic. The ones rated earliest often give Finn the most benefit of the doubt. Now if he's around in a story, he's almost always sleazy.

I do think that people are looking for an antagonist when they write fic. I personally have used Finn as an antagonist more than once. But it’s not because of the contrast to Bellamy. I could write about L, but believe it or not, I’m not a masochist and not looking to get more hate. Besides, I find her canon story to be too intense for me to turn into a fic. Because I don’t want to write a story that hurts me, and that story connects too intimately to my own. So I step back and find the romantic heart break that was not quite as personal for me.

I can’t speak for other people. 

But as for my NARRATIVE dislike of Finn in canon? It wasn’t because I started liking Bellamy, it was because as I saw the whole of his story play out, I began to recognize that his behavior that “seemed” romantic in early season1, was really kind of manipulative and controlling, and was more like a man trying to win a princess than it was a man who truly respected her as a person. He took care of her and gave her presents and protected her and put himself between her and danger (as he did for Raven up on the Ark) but at the same time, he tried to isolate her and control who she associated with, he treated her as if her opinions and goals were not important and HE knew what was best for her. Even starting with something simple and cute, like pulling her into the river. 

Finn LOOKS like the love interest. Charming. Exciting. Dashing. And it’s so flattering because he LIKES Clarke and goes after her. But his behavior towards other people is dismissive, careless, uncaring, selfish and inhumane. 

He pulls Monty and Jasper into their trek so he can go woo Clarke, but when Jasper is hurt, he discards him, not once out of fear, but THREE times. He left him behind after the spear attack, he refused to go in search of him (until bellamy was put into play and he didn’t want bellamy near clarke because he was jealous) and then when they had Jasper and they thought he was dying.  

This is his character. He showed it when he didn’t care that those first two deaths were because they followed his example. He showed it when he found a bunker with supplies, shelter and clothes, and kept it to himself to use as a personal romantic hideaway and a source of gifts to– do what now? oh yeah– woo Clarke Griffin. And he showed it again when he wanted to leave Mel to die on the cliff. 

Oh, and don’t forget how he went behind Clarke and Bellamy’s back to set up a very dangerous meeting with their enemy, because apparently his judgment on the issue was better than hers. Was it a bad plan? No, not really, was it right to do it without talking to Clarke before hand? No. That was controlling, deceitful, disrespectful and diminishing. Clarke has a mission and a goal. Finn decides she’s wrong, her mission is not important, she is trusting the wrong person and really she should be paying attention to him. 

Listen. I really would not write metas on why I think Finn is not a hero and is in fact kind of a badguy if people didn’t keep trying to tell me Finn was such a good guy and I should like him. I don’t like him. And it’s not because I’m biased in Bellamy’s favor. I started this show as a Flarker. I thought Finn was the mmc. I thought Bellamy was the bad guy. I was wrong, as was Clarke. And it wasn’t because of season 2. It was because of season 1.

Frankly I think Finn is a much more realistic bad guy than any of the others, and the type that women are far more likely to meet in real life. The great seeming guy who, once he has you, turns into a controlling, selfish dick. Because he put you on a pedestal and wanted to win you, but really didn’t want you to be an actual, independent human being. Looks real romantic and real sweet, because that’s what he wants you to see until he has you. Then it turns out, he’s not so sweet. And in the long run, having someone obsessed with having you is awful, once you get over being flattered.

I think the growing dislike for Finn as the show went on was because his romantic story and his romantic character revealed itself to be controlling and dickish. Finn is the “nice guy” who isn’t nice. 

But if you guys want to keep loving Finn, go ahead. I don’t. And every time someone tries to say I shouldn’t dislike him in my inbox, I’m going to explain why I do. I’ve had so many people try to convince me that really Finn is just a sweet, heroic character, and I’m always going to be, like, then why did he deny kids without any clothes a source of new clothing? He kept the bunker to himself because he was inherently selfish and only ever let in Clarke and Raven, who he wanted to have worship him. Raven did. Turns out that wasn’t good enough and he moved on to a Princess. I think he had a bit of a Hero Complex. He wanted to be their hero. And he would undercut them and sabotage them to do it.

Sorry. I’ve thought about this a lot. The arguments for Finn being a hero and a good person do not hold water for me.