#i've just been feeling so isolated from fandom lately

[dhampir72]

Please don't be discouraged about your writing, or the frequency of it! We adore your work, and will stick around for however long it takes <3

Thank you, anon! I really appreciate the kind words <3

[4lph4kidz]

i feel like i've been really negative at times, if not mean, and i don't really know how much of that fear is reflected in reality at all but fwiw i am sorry, that's not the kind of prescence i want to maintain here

[fuedalreesespieces]

Inuyasha & Demisexuality

i think halfway into writing this i thought about just cramming all my thoughts into a semi-coherent rant due to a combination of a.) lack of access to decent translations of the manga and b.) paranoia about over-analyzing scenes and coming off as delusional (i think by now it's probably too late to thwart that claim) buuut this headcanon in particular is near and dear to me so i want to try and get as in depth as possible.

what is demisexuality?

in simple terms, demisexuality is when an individual doesn't experience primary attraction - that is, the sort of attraction based on immediate observable (often physical) characteristics - and instead only experiences secondary attraction first: the type of attraction that forms after the development of a deep emotional bond.

inuyasha and kikyo

this aforementioned term perfectly describes inuyasha and his relationships with the only women he's ever loved romantically. you could make the claim that his inability to feel primary attraction first stems from his trust issues and not inherent sexual orientation. and to that, i would disagree - he and kikyo develop an emotional bond despite an unspoken lack of trust, which may have improved had naraku not meddled in their lives. still, both find solace in each other's similarities, loneliness, and "outlier" status (though the similarities are in isolation only, if i'm being completely honest) and establish a connection that persists post-revival.

inuyasha eventually did start to feel primary attraction to kikyo during their time together - in the second chapter of the manga, when he compares kagome to her, he states that kikyo "looked pretty."

[source - viz. i haven't been in this fandom long, but what i've gathered is that there are a lot of mis-translations of this manga, even from viz. since i have yet to buy physical copies of the manga and don't have an account for the site, i'm going to be using fan-scans for the rest of these, which hopefully won't really affect what i'm trying to convey since i'll be looking at character expressions rather than dialogue for most of them.]

i'd also note the order in which he lists those traits: kikyo looked intelligent and pretty. her intelligent appearance is the first part of her he remembers, which i think underscores his priorities in this regard. he values things like intelligence and companionship - facets that come to light when developing secondary attraction towards someone - more than aspects of primary attraction.

inuyasha and kagome

as mentioned before, demisexuals don't feel physical attraction before establishing a tight emotional bond. the most blatant examples i could think of this were any instances in which inuyasha sees kagome nude and his difference in reaction - in particular, during the yura of the hair and togenkyo arcs, which are roughly seventy-three chapters apart. there are two new moons in that time, and from that we can say at least two months have passed.

chapter six: yura of the hair

kagome's bathing below him, and i'm sorry, but this expression literally screams "zero fucks given." he does not care in the slightest. not a blush. not a spot of red on his cheeks. not a sweatdrop. not a tee-hee. if i were to describe what he's feeling in this moment i would say "extreme ire." when she uses the sit command on him, it's on the assumption that he's "peeking," but kaede understands that it's actually because inuyasha is trying to steal a shard of the shikon jewel.

"huh?" - he sounds genuinely confused that she reached that conclusion, even though he was quite literally peering over the cliff's edge in what obviously has very perverse connotations. it's almost like he doesn't understand why kagome would think his actions come from a place of sexual attraction because that sort of thing just isn't on his mind at all, and he doesn't get why it would be in the first place.

another extremely blatant example can be see in miroku's introductory chapter: chapter 51, the delinquent priest:

do i even have to say anything. this scene also further emphasizes my previous point - before, the only reason he was there was to try and steal kagome's jewel shard. if his true intentions had been driven by primary attraction, this would have been an opportune moment to "peep." in his words, however, he just isn't interested. note that he could have said something along the lines of "i wouldn't do something like that" (which, if he was attracted to her in that way from the start, wouldn't have done anyway) but specifically i'm not interested. the primary attraction is not there in the slightest. at least, not until:

chapter eighty two: fateful night in togenkyo

the scene i'm talking about needs no introduction, but for context: kagome's half-freaking out after having woken up in a sake bath. inuyasha breaks down the door to come and rescue her, accidentally seeing her naked in the process. well, i'm sure his reaction won't be that dif-

...it's only one panel-

okay, two-

i think at this point it's fairly obvious that primary attraction has developed. besides the fact that he's spent three panels trying not to look like he's having a quasi allergic reaction, it's been approximately two months since they've met, and by now they've definitely formed the deep emotional bond required for him to begin feeling any primary attraction at all. in fact, the chapter where he tells kagome "there's no replacement for you" - that chapter, where he's vulnerable and honest and opening up to her, strengthening their bond further, (ch. 78, a tender smell) is directly before the togenkyo arc begins, and, thus, just before these scenes occur. these chapters have all been building up secondary attraction, and now that primary attraction is just starting to show up.

several chapters later we have this iconic panel from 173:

this is such a look of awe, as though he's gazing up at a goddess. jaw dropped, eyes-wide, words trailing off awe. he's entranced. fully head-over-heels in love, feeling both primary and secondary attraction in regards to kagome, and this trend only continues throughout the entirety of the manga.

conclusion + extra thoughts

my belief in this headcanon comes from not just the evidence depicted above, but because i just related a ton reading those scenes. i found myself just nodding along (as someone who's demisexual themselves!) plus, since ace-spectrum representation is so rare, it's nice to see it reflected in a character whose story and relationships i love dearly.

tags: @nightshade-lullaby

[sir-adamus]

this isn't directed at anyone specifically, as this is a sentiment i've seen a lot, but i think some people were expecting some kind of catharsis in regards to Neo being punished or just straight up dying in the volume 9 finale because they don't personally like and are therefore dismissive of the character; and then making claims that it was bad writing that she didn't get the shit kicked out of her and was then killed, but instead getting to bow out gracefully and taking the first step to improve on herself and find herself again (which, i have to say, is not a redemption, the claims of 'bad writing' always paint it as such which is weird to me - it's like, the start, at best)

and i've been seeing this sentiment for months and, from the perspective of someone who never really had an issue with the character and liked the way she was handled, every time i've always had the same question of like, is it bad? or do you just not like it? cos let's be real that's been a major, major problem in this fandom for years, and even the people who complain about it coming from the loud vocal minority are often guilty of similar behaviour, just in more 'acceptable' ways

there was this really good post i reblogged the other day, which i'll link here, which basically covers my general feelings on this in regards to media in general, but in specific regard to the show;

a) the main characters' priorities have never been on personal payback, and neither has the show's (which it makes a point with several times, with Yang and Blake giving Adam multiple opportunities to stop and just leave as just an example, which he doesn't take), so there's no reason for them to go after Neo when she's no longer a threat

b) by the time WBY would've had the opportunity to 'punish' Neo for everything she did, Neo was possessed, and in the aftermath of that, was no longer hostile to them because of the events leading up to her getting possessed in the first place

RWB/Y is a show with lots of thematic resonance, we see parallels and layers and one of the major themes in the show is grief, and how you handle it; in the Ever After, Neo serves as a microcosm of Salem - she lost the one positive (though ultimately co-dependent and not particularly healthy) relationship she had after a horrible childhood of isolation and instead of coming to terms with her grief, she dedicates herself to revenge (which was her characterisation click moment when she returned in volume 6, as that return actually gave her motivations and a goal, versus how she was in volumes 2 and 3, where she was just kinda there and didn't have all that much to her) and it consumes her, so when she actually does get that revenge she wanted, instead of there being any kind of catharsis, she's just left hollow and empty because she has nothing left, which leaves her open to getting possessed by the Cat

but after being freed from possession, Neo has no reason to keep fighting because of that prior realisation, and comes to the conclusion that she needs to move on, with the best opportunity to do so being letting the Tree help her. and this is what loops back to the post i linked; Neo is given the option to stop and change and she takes it

does it come too late? sure - but by the same note, better late than never. besides, the Ever After is a fairytale world where the normal rules don't apply, so 'late' isn't as damning as it would've been

[emkini]

heyy I read towards the sun the other day bc I saw you mention it and it fucked. so ty!!!! if you feel like it, do you have other atla recs? 👀

Ohohoh do I

Notes:

I tend to be primarily a zuko-centric gen fic enjoyer in the atla fandom so that's what most of these are gonna be!

Pretty much every author on this list has a bunch of stellar works and I'd recommend checking out all of their ao3 profiles, but these are just some of my personal favorites!

I've been having a Rough Time™ lately, so most of my faves fall on the soft and squishy side– if you're looking for heavy angst I do not have much of it 😔

-----------

Salvage (complete) by @muffinlance is by the same author as Towards The Sun and a fandom classic at this point; I cannot recommend it enough. Summary: Mid-Season-One Zuko is held for ransom by Chief Hakoda. Ozai's replies to the Water Tribe's demands are A+ Parenting. Hakoda is… deeply concerned, for this son that isn't his, and who might be safer among enemies than with his own father.

The Fire Nation Yacht Club series (reads as complete) by @sword-and-stars gives me all the emotions. Summary: Sokka knows three (3) things: 1. The caldera is on fire. 2. Ozai’s really, really dead (and so is his daughter). 3. The only one having a worse day is probably Zuko. / Everyone has their breaking point. This is what happens after you’ve broken. In which healing is a process and also it kind of sucks.

For Hearth and Home (complete) is another classic fic by the same author (honestly just check out all of their work, it's all stellar) that I absolutely adore. Summary: There’s a child underneath Fire Lord Zuko’s desk. He doesn’t realize this until he sits down and tiny hands wrap themselves around his ankles, and Fire Lord Zuko definitely does not shriek and backpedal away at the unexpected touch. He definitely does do that but Gou, the single guard he’s agreed to let shadow him, is kind enough not to mention it.

Mountains and Badgermolehills (complete) by Glass_Onion is an incredibly fun and well-written romp of a read. Summary: After the Blue Spirit frees the Avatar from the Pohuai Stronghold, Admiral Zhao captures Prince Zuko under suspicion of treason. Isolated from his Uncle and his crew, Zuko has only one ally: the chatty prisoner one cell over.

The Art of Burning (incomplete, ongoing) by @hella1975 is superb- lots of angst, lots of emotions, and lots of memes. Summary (excerpt): In a warring land, the Water Tribe forgave the enemy in an act of defiance. For this, he was torn from them, and this time, his wounds won't heal so easily.

Embers (complete) by Vathara is another fandom classic– one I have not yet been able to finish because dear god is it long. like holy shit. Very dense and plot-heavy and an incredible read if you're a lover of worldbuilding and fantasy politics. Summary: Dragon's fire is not so easily extinguished; when Zuko rediscovers a lost firebending technique, shifting flames can shift the world...

where the stars do not take sides (complete) by WitchofEndor is a very sweet and interesting canon divergence fic, and of course as always I am a SUCKER for the fire siblings being close. Such a sucker. Summary: When Azula is nine, she becomes an only child. She hears the Fire Lord call for Zuko's life, and in the morning, her mother and brother are gone. Azula may be young, but she isn't naive. She knows what happened to them. Which makes it all the more surprising when Azula tracks the Avatar down and fights his group of peasant friends, only to find herself staring into an eerily familiar face.

Honor & Vengeance on the High Seas (complete) by @paramouradrift is a very fun read– I haven't finished it yet but if you love boats, pirate Zuko, and angry teenagers being gay and doing crime, I guarantee you'll have a good time. Summary: Zuko was banished, but instead of devoting his life to finding the Avatar to regain his honor he gave in to his spite and became a pirate against Ozai.

And the world, still so wild, called to me (I was lost, I’d been kept on my knees) (complete) by delightfullydiscordant– An Aang-centric fic that hurts my HEART Summary (excerpt): A study in grief and loss, in anger and hate.

a viper-lizard's tales (incomplete, ongoing) by Yumi_Take is really sweet and very fun; it has a simple but unique and interesting prose style that I really like. Summary: The desert sun burns and Zuko probably shouldn't touch the moving cloth, but he does anyway.

[sapphire-weapon]

So. I gotta say some shit.

I think we all have a tendency to be more gracious to Ada's character than she rightfully deserves. I'm guilty of this, too. We all want to give her the benefit of the doubt and insist that her character serves a purpose and is worth talking about because she's A. such a huge part of Leon's character and B. the only non-white member of the cast, but like.

There's nothing there.

I noticed this when I rewatched Separate Ways recently (because fuck ever playing that shit again holy fuck Separate Ways sucks to play).

After RE2, Ada isn't a character anymore. She has absolutely no arc; her character never develops or goes anywhere. She's not tied to anyone or anything in the plot in a way that matters -- even her relationship with Wesker doesn't fucking matter, because there's no fallout or consequence as a result of anything she does to/with/for him, whether it's beneficial to him or against him. She has only one facet to her personality: snarky and mysterious. We never see her emote or speak in a context removed from either of those two qualifiers. Ever.

She has some softer moments here and there, but they last for like a single line of dialogue or two and then the scene just completely moves on without them -- so, those softer moments never actually matter anyway.

She doesn't enhance or enrich Leon's character in any way; the only thing her character serves to do is isolate him from the main cast, which gives his character nowhere else to go other than horrible, spiraling depression because every action he takes in his life turns out to be completely meaningless -- because it's not allowed to mean anything, because he's become so far divorced from the central plot of the series.

The only functional purpose that Ada Wong actually has is as a plot contrivance to explain how a bad guy did a thing. Other than that, she exists solely as a pair of legs and tits for Leon to chase after.

We all hold out hope that Remake is going to change this and turn her into a real person with autonomous motivations and goals, and there might be some merit to that, but like

She's not there yet. She's just not. There is no there there, when we talk about Ada's character.

And this tiptoeing around that we all do to try to make it seem like we're supportive of her character just

strikes me as silly a lot of the time, man.

I understand wanting to give credit where it's due, but it's not due for Ada's character. And I understand the desire to not be seen as misogynistically bashing her, but I feel like supporting her character as it currently exists is what's actually misogynistic. Because her portrayal in canon is misogynistic.

And I also understand the desire to not be seen as being a ship war fuckhead, but like. It's not about the ships, man. It's about Ada. Specifically Ada. She just sucks, dude.

And this is coming from the person who has probably written more meta about Ada Wong in an attempt to justify her character than basically anyone else in the fucking fandom.

idk I've just been thinking about this lately while perusing EagleOne fics. It feels like everyone in this ship feels obligated to address The Ada Problem before they can start to justify a relationship between Leon and Ashley, and it's like

No, you don't. Especially in Remake canon, you absolutely do not have to bring up Ada at all. Because Remake seems very self-aware of the fact that the problem with Leon's character has always been Ada, which is why they seem to be actively writing her out of his overall arc.

Like. Let's just call it for what it is. Ada is the worst part of Leon's character. The relationship is poorly written and poorly executed and doesn't make any fucking sense for who both characters are actually meant to be. They actively hold each other back -- not as people, but as characters who are meant to meaningfully contribute to the storyline.

And idk I'm just tired. I'm just tired of always having to do the hand-wringy "oh no no, Ada's really cool and great and I'm not trying to diss on her, and her relationship with Leon actually matters" shit, man.

Because she's not cool or great and her relationship with Leon doesn't actually matter -- and if it does matter at all, it's due to the negative impact that her presence brings -- not just to him, but to the entire fucking plot of the series.

She's the worst recurring element in the entire series, and there's not even a close second.

[mythicalartistx]

Lately I've been appreciating Vanitas more...

Honestly I just really like his character cause it's kinda sad...

Okay liking a character because it's sad isn't a good thing but—

Hear me out.

I really like the idea of him being forced out of Ven and basically kinda in a similar situation as Repliku.

Just a sad silly little guy who deserves so much more than what he has to deal with.

Then here are the Unversed.

The Unversed are little enemies that are like heartless except they come from Vanitas and he can control them and whatnot. Then each time someone slaughters one of the Unversed with the keyblade, Vanitas himself gets hurt and it's just sad.

And honestly I want a pet (flood) Unversed. They seem so cute just like heartless (shadows).

Fandom kinda weird about Vanitas...Makes me uncomfy

The hardest part about him is that the fandom and people who like him make him out to be this twisted, messed up character that does uncomfy nonconsensual things.

And it's so annoying because he such a great character and when I look up random art or just things about him, I don't want to see that.

I can look up fan things of Sora, Riku, and like 90% of the other characters and find decent cool things, but with him it's really hard to.

Wayfinders and Darkness

He does bad things to the Wayfinder Trio because he's darkness and everyone always says darkness is bad.

Until Riku came along

You're told darkness is bad and is dealt with doing not so good things you'd probably become a morally grey character/ not so good person to others.

He probably feels isolated.

Then there's Xehanort trying to get Vanitas to do things for him as well as using the Wayfinders to manipulate them to darkness.

Then he's told to reconnect with his other half to forge some kind of ancient χ-blade for the purpose of creating Kingdom Hearts

Vanitas does bad things and uses the darkness for evil but you also weren't showing why doing good things is better.

Since you can use darkness for good and evil, while also using the light the same way. All those masters were told use darkness is bad and didn't do a thing about the stuff happening Eraqus, Odin, and

Yen Sid (he's probably one of the better ones but still had both Sora and Riku take that exam when it was obvious something was going to happen)

Sora offers a 2nd Chance

Then in KH3 Vanitas along some others wants to find Ven and realizes this through encountering Sora.

It isn't until the final battle where Sora offers him a chance.

He tells him, You can be who you want to be. Basically kinda like Sora in COM telling Repliku, you are your own person too.

Then Vanitas tells Sora but I am Darkness and that is who I choose to be.

Sora realizes Vanitas wants to be darkness and decides that.

Vanitas chooses to fade away and the others understand his choice.

HC + Future installments

They gave him a chance, well Sora mainly and I think with that he could come back in the future a be a morally grey/ decent character who's neither good or bad.

Kinda like Riku but a little bit different.

Like he will probably use darkness but he might help them some as well.

He's done some bad but he could also do good.

That is why the fan trio — The Lost Trio would be so fun to have more of.

I think them interacting would be so interesting to see since they all are really similar. Plus it could just be like this wholesome thing

And another thing that makes them so great is because it's like the reversed Destiny Trio

[esther-dot]

I'm the 2011/2013 Tumblr anon, and this is kind of embarrassing to admit but I'm also the original Dune anon, if that gives you any idea of my fandom background. (*/ω＼*) I've been in fandom since I was probably eleven or twelve, so fandom is basically home to me lol. I was always more of a sci-fi fan than a fantasy fan growing up, and so it wasn't until GOT I heard of the books; I'd never been a fan of the show, and I was impartial at best to the books. (At school, I knew classmates were reading them--- but for full context, I was a nerd disliked by other nerds for being too weird, so I wanted nothing to do with Tolkien/GRRM lol). I still have a bone to pick with GRRM (and this is partly what limits my participation) and in the case of my regular fandom, I'm very much used to isolation lol. (It's alt-right trolls who have a problem with me... sigh. Imagine a ship like Jonsa which redeems the books' thematic ideas and that's my situation).

I actually was familiar with the Sansa/Sandor ship long before I was interested in either media, because of the shipping circles I run in. Going from that lack of context to the context revealed in the actual books was very weird, because they seem like extremely disparate concepts. If you take Sansa/Sandor scenes and rearrange things, including the numbers in Sansa's age, it does feel like a powerfully violent BatB rendering with a dash of medieval pseudorealism; he's no prince and the romance is impossible, but perhaps he could be her knight or guardian in an unconsummated chaste romance or secret affair etc. It made me really rethink some of the ships I was interested in, and why, and where my tastes diverged from people I usually trusted. I am much less interested in ship archetypes by themselves than how those are enshrined in the narrative/themes at stake. It's also just interesting to me that Jonsa is an arguably truer, redeeming rendering of BatB, or a revisitation of that theme--- which GRRM is interested in, Sansa/Sandor fans are correct about that, but I think it's foreshadowing a future arc for her. Surely all the BatB exploration is being set up for something big?

So how did I find Jonsa.... well, it was a consequence of reading the books lol, though I imagine many people would say the show was illuminating (which is no condemnation that antis think it is). My interest in the books was primarily piqued through the show's ending--- I came to things rather late, but I'm thankful for that, considering that it seems like some of the best fandom discourse has taken place since then. I was mostly interested in it for the purposes of comparison of adaptation, which I find very interesting, and because I find predicting endgames in general very fun albeit painful. I watch a lot of things just to see what my instinctual feeling is because I like practising my narrative divination. I like engaging with storytelling! But I do have a mechanical fascination with it as well. I think this motivated my sending an ask about Dune to both you and transdimensional-void, mostly because the thing that often leads me in the right direction is getting a 'feeling' for the tone of something--- sometimes even beyond pure narrative reasoning. Lol

You'd ordinarily think the show would be offputting to a Jonsa theory (and this is a major spanner in the works, although I do kind of only semi-ironically believe they paired Jon with D/aenerys because E/milia Clarke is shorter than Kit H/arrington, where S/ophie is too tall, which they couldn't have predicted before being informed about a potential Jonsa resolution--- when in doubt, assume stupidity) but Jonsa is also deliciously ironic and tragic even if redeemed through an actual marriage (and we have so many weddings, over and over, that a symbolic redemption of Rhaegar/Lyanna's wound is basically being begged for--- Lyanna is realised in many ways in the story, through both Arya and Sansa... but it makes sense they'd redeem two sides to Lyanna, the wild wolfgirl and the girl married to a dragon. The wound inflicted through Rhaegar's absconding with Lyanna has to be redeemed, whether that is positively or shirking the possibility of a Lyanna/Rhaegar union altogether, so the door is open for tragic Jonsa in my eyes. These types of narrative questions are what I look out for when predicting narrative resolutions and is what led to me to seriously consider Jonsa). I was meditating on this recently because people were asking whether Cat and Ned would approve, and the marriage is only possible because they're dead. A Jon/Sansa arrangement is only possible because they have lost the people they loved most, and perhaps--- like I've seen suggested!--- it might even drive Arya away. As a writer, that, to me, is how you make Ned and Catelyn's deaths in the story echo in a bittersweet way. It's good storytelling. It goes beyond 'and we re-enact the lessons of parents' which is the normal way you'd realise parental remembrance and legacy. And something tells me GRRM isn't interested in predictability. Unless you've read Gothic literature.

So, beyond Jonsa I'm very interested in the reasoning underpinning the show's derivations, and in my case I'm much more interested in Jonsa in the books than the show (that wasn't really what did it), though in the case of the show, I'm interested in where you can potentially see reflections of a book dynamic. But so much of the adaptation is muddied that it's hard to parse, and I'm really not sure how much of GRRM's suggestions they truly had versus what they stuck to. If they knew they needed 'a Jon romance', in the same way as they needed Robb to break his wedding pact with the Freys, but supplemented Talisa, what was motivating their decisionmaking? D/aenerys was the selling star of the show and basically the face of it, and the face of the merchandise and the cultural conversation etc. (which is why they made her death punishing--- the storytelling is so spiteful, and normally I'm a villain apologist through and through, but this case was particularly egregious) and it would seem silly not to give her a romance, because how can you write important female characters without romance? Now, I'm a perennial romance apologist, but the thinking here, to me, seems rather suspicious. So, I think what's special about ASOIAF right now is we've got a theoretical ending through the show, but where does that translate to the books? And where does the fandom get it wrong, and where do they get it right? The historic ubiquity of Sansa/Sandor, and many other fandom trends (e.g. D/aenerys is the rightful ruler, or tragic heroine, and so on) is kind of like honey to me, because all of those theories were completely blown out of the water by the show, but critically--- critically--- there's still room for expansion in the book for other directions. I was put off by simplistic interpretations of the books that floated around and when I read them the fandom characterisation, crossplatform, was actually shocking to me.

Since you asked--- and I'm terribly sorry--- I have a lot of feelings about when TWOW may or may not come out, not just because of anticipation, but because GRRM's authorial struggle is hard to watch through the eyes of fandom. The condemnation of his procrastination, his apparent carelessness--- that he 'took the money and ran'--- the hopelessness--- it's very hard to watch, and what I wonder is how he feels as a writer. Releasing TWOW will lead him into the final endgame, and he'll have to say goodbye to his magnum opus. That is very hard, beyond the show sailing ahead, and beyond anything else. It also gets to me in a personal way (which no one else can help!) because I am a writer trying to finish a long work, and I'm literally at the equivalent point GRRM is, and--- although he's a celebrated published author, and I'm writing for the sole joy of it--- I think that there is probably something fundamentally similar there, which is that holy fuck it's hard. It doesn't matter how much you know what you need to do, doing it is hard, and writing itself is actually an extremely difficult task. And by writing that means formulating ideas, as well as actual finger to DOS machine.

Writing sometimes is kind of like trying to paint a person, except you've never seen a human being before.

But I think that if GRRM is really committed to his bittersweet romanticism, he can pull off a goodbye, lol. And as much as I quibble with his narrative ethos and sometimes he makes me tear my hair out, I want to see him complete his work, because I think every single author deserves that. And because I think that at a minimum, for something like ASOIAF, the legacy of its ending ought to be his final say. I can't speak to his actual psyche but I do fully believe if he can publish TWOW, he can do ADOS. My observation is that TWOW is structurally much more difficult than ADOS, and I think that's one of many reasons he's been dragging his heels, long before the show caught up. Once he gets to the victory lap of ADOS, he will probably have both a professionally and emotionally easier time in terms of having to finish it. TWOW merges the split threads of AFFC and ADWD, whereas ADOS will only have to follow through (touch wood) on the one book, where many perspectives and their storylines will have converged--- at some point, we may have Sansa, Jon, and Brienne all unified! Which resolves character goals as well as being more economic with POV distribution. This is the angle I find very interesting because I think the way he uses character chapters to establish context and meaning beyond pure character is actually genius and rarely done so well in genre fiction, and I'm completely envious of it. (This is also why Jon/Sansa makes so much sense).

This is a terribly long ask so please don't feel the need to respond line by line, lol. I think I got a little excited! Having a positive fandom interaction is so nice. It's really weird that fandom has become such a polarised place (I mean, we had ship wars, but people kept to themselves more), and you're lucky Jonsa is your first fandom--- well, outside of the anti-Jonsas--- because I think it's a lovely place.

This goes for any Jonsa reading it: thank you all for literally keeping me sane. 🥰🥰🥰🥰 If I may ask, Esther, I think you've said that you came to Jonsa through the show then the books--- what drew you to Tumblr fandom? I'm always interested in how people find fandom!

Dune, anon! I'll tag @transdimensional-void because your convo about it did make me finally watch Dune (although I still don't think I'll read the book, sorry!), but the film was gorgeous. I didn't realize the director was Villeneuve. He always has very interesting projects and arresting visuals. Arrival was such a surprising take on an alien movie and it has really stayed with me. I think he has exquisite pacing, too.

Well now I’m even more concerned about the attempted doxing! Horrifying. The internet can be a wonderful thing, but I swear, it brings out the absolute worst in people.

I totally get what you mean about S*nsan seemingly being a BatB thing, but I’ve suggested before that it’s more in line with one of the old monster movies or even King Kong which love to pair something terrifying with a beautiful woman or little girl. It doesn’t mean romance, it’s the juxtaposition of extremes, raw power being stopped by beauty, violence being calmed by gentleness. There’s that line at the end of King Kong, “It was beauty killed the beast.” IMO, the beast and beauty idea is certainly there for the Hound and Sansa, I just don't think it's Disney's Beauty and the Beast. It's a highly romanticized idea, but not a romance in the way we use the term now.

My parents are both huge readers, not really into novels. My dad liked The Hobbit and LOTR tho, and got really into doing dramatic readings of those at bedtime for us kids. I remember The Hobbit the best because he’d make up tunes for all the songs and sing them. They’re very nostalgic for me, that love extends to the LOTR movies, but made it impossible for me to sit through the Hobbit adaptation. Anyway, I read a few sci fi and fantasy books, but I never really got into it. My little sister on the other hand luuuuurrrvs fantasy and she was the one who got me to watch GoT (I’d heard of the books, hadn’t read them) together, but then we ended up living in different states and she decided that it should be our thing to avoid spoilers and only watch the show when we got together. So, we were always running behind from that point on, but we made it through s5 that way. Eventually we just didn’t have the time to do that, and she was so disgusted with s5 she was happy to drop it completely--never watched another episode. I was too invested to stop, so I watched s6-7 myself and was simply appalled by the characterization of Jon. It made me get online for GoT content for the first time. This was in 2018. I saw that Martin gave interviews saying the show’s ending would be his ending, so I a) sped read the books, b) started listening to some of his interviews, c) saw the term “Jonsa” for the first time in the comments of one.

It took nothing to get me onboard because Jon and Sansa were my favorites, I really loved their scenes together, I hated everything after they separated in s7, and I read a lot of 19th century lit as a teenager, so cousin marriage didn't even strike me as weird in the historical context. I can't remember which meta it was I read first, one of Fedon's or blindestspot's prediction of a Jonsa reunion and marriage from 2013, but I got on tumblr and was totally sucked into the fandom.

“I do kind of only semi-ironically believe they paired Jon with D/aenerys because E/milia Clarke is shorter than Kit H/arrington, where S/ophie is too tall”  — I’m screaming. D&D @ Kit: "Sorry buddy, if you didn’t want your character to fall in love with a mass murdering tyrant you should have kept growing." lmaooooo.

“Jonsa is also deliciously ironic and tragic even if redeemed through an actual marriage (and we have so many weddings, over and over, that a symbolic redemption of Rhaegar/Lyanna's wound is basically being begged for--- Lyanna is realised in many ways in the story, through both Arya and Sansa... but it makes sense they'd redeem two sides to Lyanna, the wild wolfgirl and the girl married to a dragon. The wound inflicted through Rhaegar's absconding with Lyanna has to be redeemed, whether that is positively or shirking the possibility of a Lyanna/Rhaegar union altogether, so the door is open for tragic Jonsa in my eyes.” --You put this so beautifully. I wish you'd get a side blog and post that in the Jonsa tag, I love it!

One of the major puzzles to me is how the fandom all know just how much the text talks to itself, it's notably self-referential, so the way they dismiss the idea of Rhaegar's son and a Stark girl romance...I have a really hard time believing they don't see the logic there, how it would bring things full circle. The way they treat S*nsan as "practically canon" while calling Jonsa a crack ship when we have that hanging over our heads is a little incomprehensible.

“I was meditating on this recently because people were asking whether Cat and Ned would approve, and the marriage is only possible because they're dead. A Jon/Sansa arrangement is only possible because they have lost the people they loved most, and perhaps--- like I've seen suggested!--- it might even drive Arya away.” --I agree with this too. I am very struck by how NedCat, some of the best people and one of the best relationships Martin offers, has this pain and tragedy written into their love. That's a big reason why I can't quite get on board with an easy resolution to Jonsa, because Martin is just drawn to conflict which is why his characters and story is so compelling, but also makes me think, there will be layers to Jonsa, some real pain there.

“And something tells me GRRM isn't interested in predictability. Unless you've read Gothic literature.” — I once posted a list of gothic lit tropes and he’s included all of them. But Gothic heavily influenced horror, and ASOIAF has horror elements, so that isn't totally surprising when you think about it. It still amuses me though!

It’s definitely a real struggle to see the sense behind D&D’s choices but when I was reading an interview looking for a specific quote, I did see that even in 2011 Martin was saying he knew the endgames, which is a) comforting for Sansa ending up safely in Winterfell purposes, b) reassuring for Dark Dany believers, c) hilarious when you think about how many people are still pissed about Arya and Bran’s fates. And Jon? Well, I’ve made my peace with a tragic ending (although I’ve mocked it a great deal too because I can't see how it works), but we all know they fucked him over the most in s7-8, so I could also see D&D trashing what his ending was meant to be in favor of catering to Targ fans. Apparently Emilia has recently reiterated her frustration that Jon “got away” with killing Dany, so like…imagine the rage if he’d killed Dany and then got a HEA in Winterfell. 

My feeling is that Martin told them Jon would kill Dany and they chose to do "the romance" (which imo, they didn't like because the way they wrote and filmed it and permitted Kit to act it just...sabotaged it in every way imaginable) to make it more palatable to her fans who ate it up. They actually are comforted that Jon "loved" Dany and after s8 dropped pics/gifs of him cradling her dead body into our tag bragging that he loved her. Like, D&D made really crappy choices, but I think it was about manhandling their audience while hitting Martin's plot points they knew the Targ fans would hate, not a result of them throwing out the endgames.

“ The condemnation of his procrastination, his apparent carelessness--- that he 'took the money and ran' --I’m not a Martin defender, I have real reservations with some of his choices, but I have family his age and do try to think of him as a person. I find a lot of how people speak of him...well, I have no issue with people being frustrated we don't have TWOW considering how long ago he said he'd finish it (like, back in 2016) and how often since then he's indicated getting close to the end only for it to then sound like he's quite a ways away. As long as people don't harass him, I don't think it's an issue to talk about this in fandom spaces. However, they often sound ignorant of what it takes to write something like ASOIAF, with all the levels he's trying to work on. Also, his writing style sounds like a total nightmare? The idea of tearing things up to fix them seems hopeless to me, and he’s talked about doing this repeatedly—it would be so hard to finish a chapter or several and then realize, nope, gotta rework all of it.

“because I am a writer trying to finish a long work, and I'm literally at the equivalent point GRRM is, and--- although he's a celebrated published author, and I'm writing for the sole joy of it--- I think that there is probably something fundamentally similar there, which is that holy fuck it's hard.” --Oh ho ho! Well, you know that’s gonna make me have all sorts of questions, so if you want to tell me about your work (genre, tome or series, influences, themes etc) I am all ears, but I also know some writers have to keep all that to themselves until they’re done so I won’t pry. Although, because of our exchanges, I would be interested in how you use romance in your own writing.

“writing itself is actually an extremely difficult task” // “Writing sometimes is kind of like trying to paint a person, except you've never seen a human being before.” —dead! I think the issue is, many people don’t distinguish between types of writing? So someone doesn’t distinguish between the goal and what say, a modern romance is attempting to accomplish versus a Jane Austen novel. They might end the evaluation at "like or didn't" and not grasp what all goes into different types of novels, their individual successes or failures, and why some novelists can complete multiple novels in a year, another might spend a few years on one. I think about this a lot when I see people suggest Martin get some ghost writers, and like, this man isn’t churning out genre fiction (which I love, I was a snob as a teen and cured myself, but it is an entirely different kind of writing!), so it's just...a lot of fans totally misjudge the effort required and how easily replicated the work would be.

“I think that at a minimum, for something like ASOIAF, the legacy of its ending ought to be his final say” --I find it incredibly sad every year that goes by and the chance of him completing his series dwindles. People forget that what holds sway over a culture doesn’t always have staying power and a) I think his work is doomed to being forever misinterpreted unless he finishes and b) I don’t think he’ll have accomplished what he wanted to regarding elevating fantasy / getting it the respect he believes it deserves unless he gets to that ending. It's a shame.

I enjoyed reading all your thoughts on Jonsa, the ideas it touches on and how GoT/ASOIAF might differ. Thank you!

[ethaneldritch]

Starting to think my LoK ideas are veering too far from the source.

I have a tendency for lightheartedness in my storytelling that hasn't been sitting well with me as of late. Maybe I've just had too much Land of the Lustrous influence leak into the mix, but I almost feel guilty for headcanoning as much wholesome stuff as I do.

LoK is a gothic tragedy, steeped in grey morality and predestination with the faintest tinge of hope on the horizon. I feel like my work, both written and visual, can't do that atmosphere justice anymore.

It was funny in the beginning: "Hey look, the big scary vampire is being silly!" But that's become almost all I contribute. I'm straight-up awful at writing angst, and yet I feel like a fraud constantly putting a positive spin on something so dark. It just feels...unrealistic. Unnatural.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I can't seem to remedy my own headcanons with what I think I "should" be headcanoning. There's no right or wrong in fandom, but because LoK's is so close-knit I fear I might "ruin" something if I stray too far from canon.

I see headcanons I disagree with all the time, and yet I somehow can't allow myself the same grace to freely play with ideas. I'm always prefacing my thoughts with phrases like "I imagine" or "I like to think", because I'm constantly wary of writing something "wrong". It's confusing, isolating, and maddening.

[tokiro07]

Was talking to a customer today about media consumption, specifically about the benefits and risks of binging

I've talked about this concept a number of times lately it feels like, but this particular conversation helped me realize a nice framework to look at it with: while binging is quick and to an extent feels good (i.e. "I finished this series in X amount of time!"), it greatly reduces the amount of anchor points that one can form to become attached to the media in question

For example, when I was reading Dungeon Meshi, I ended up reading all 90+ chapters in the span of three days; Dungeon Meshi is made up of a lot of small arcs, each lasting only a few chapters, and I ended up reading all of them in the same context (sitting on my couch at around the same time of day) with minimal exposure to outside factors (other readers, sharing what I was doing with my family or friends, etc.)

Aside from key moments, like those that were particularly funny ("an exact duplicate...?") or particularly emotionally impactful (the ancient magic, Senshi's youth, post-Dungeon Rabbits, etc.), I feel like I couldn't really relay the events of the story to someone else without missing a lot of the best bits because, again, by binging them I ended up mashing all of the events together in my mind. I didn't even end up reading it at a particularly noteworthy time in my own life, so reading it so quickly meant that it didn't end up connecting to my personal life either

Compare to say, One Piece, which I hadn't actually read in its entirety until Gear 4th was revealed; I realized that the significance of this moment may have been lost on me, so I decided that this would be a good time for me to fill in any of the gaps in my knowledge (i.e. Davy Back, Skypiea, Water 7, etc.) and read the full-color version

At just shy of 800 chapters at the time, this process took me approximately three weeks; some chapters I read lying on my bed, some I read sitting in a chair, some I read during breaks in college. Some I read while listening to Three Days Grace, some while listening to 10 Years, some while listening to Rise Against

Even though I was binging One Piece, the sheer amount of time it took me to actually do so ended up giving me a ton of opportunities to create anchors; I remember different contexts, outside conversations, and most importantly, the impacts that they had on me

Rereading Punk Hazard at the time was definitely the highlight, as it altered not only my reading experience but my involvement in the fandom and just generally how I lived my life. Because I was reminded of Monet, I started looking into the theories surrounding her, which led to me looking into other theories and finding forums like Oro Jackson. Monet herself became the ultimate anchor point for me, as she retroactively became the frame of reference that I have for my entire One Piece experience

Reading One Piece took so long that it ended up being a defining segment of my life in and of itself, whereas the time spent reading Dungeon Meshi was so small that it barely registers as a single event, despite the fact that I think it's extremely high quality and a story I highly recommend

It's like when you're studying for an exam - you can't just cram the night before, you'll wear your brain out and only really remember the first and last things you read particularly clearly; but if you space it out and give yourself time to rest, you'll have multiple beginnings and endings that you'll remember a lot better than you would have otherwise, both because they're each their own isolated incident that you can think back to while also giving yourself enough time to recover

So when you're consuming a new piece of media that you've really wanted to get into but you were too late for the live updates, please consider regulating your experience. Limit yourself to 10 chapters a day, or one arc per day, or whatever's the most conducive to that particular medium. Just resist the temptation of "just one more, it's so good and I've got time for it"

You may have the time for it, but like eating a bag of candy, you're going to end up overdoing it and regretting it because A) you don't feel as good as you would have otherwise and B) now you don't have it when you want it later

[neonswitchhouse]

Hey, I love your posts on Pop culture paganism, it's been helping me a lot. I just wanted to ask, how do you deal/cope with the insecurities that come with working with the "villains" from sources?

I find myself drawn to villains moreso than heroes, and I feel more at home with them. However, I get so insecure about it, especially when interacting with other pop culture practitioners. I would love any advice you might have about this, and if you already posted about this, my apologies - Clementine

Hey there! I briefly went over villain work and some of the drawbacks in a previous post, but to get a bit more in-depth (and since that post is a bit older nowadays) I'll try to give some tips.

So I've always been a villain-worker since I started on this path from jail breaking dogmen, ghostly mobsters, mutated fishmen, and lately a brief foray into eldritch horrors, obsessive lovers, and streamers that would get banned from the Home Depot for the inappropriate use of hardware tools. And what I can say is in a sense that it sadly "comes with the territory" or is the "nature of the beast" per se.

A majority of villains either may prefer isolation due to their "nefarious" schemes and plots or nature of their work and need to keep a low profile, while others just might not be used to being out-there due to a number of reasons including being ostracized or "othered" in their sources. From my observations, this may oftentimes also happen for those who are fans of the character as well in the "othering" sense in that they might not feel as at-home as say, protagonists fans, or even being accused of condoning a characters actions or behaviors just because they're a fan of theirs in let's say some more toxic fandom spaces as of late.

So the best advice I would have is to simply embrace it. Be open about it and develop your confidence and brazenness. Those who understand and feel the same way will flock to you naturally and form a small community of sorts. And those who don't well, as long as they mind their business they can go on their merry way; no one's forcing them to go down the same path or be involved with the same characters. Share your experiences working with them to help others feel comfortable and be more open as well (that's what we try to do ourselves anyway ^^;;)!

The isolation or the "othering" is part of the reason I would only recommend villain work to maybe intermediate or at least somewhat experienced practitioners, but it can also be a deeply rewarding and intense path to those who feel drawn to it. Embrace working with your beloathed beloveds; be open about your experiences good or bad.

Besides, not every villain is 100% "evil" and not every hero is 100% "good". Plus there's that whole rejection of "black vs. white" "high vibe vs. low vibe" thinking that should hopefully be in most folk's approach to witchcraft and paganism as a whole. It's all gray and subjective, baybay.

As always

Stay safe, have fun, stay spooky <3

[fereldanwench]

Questions for Writers

I was tagged by @corpocyborg! Thank you, bb!! ���

Last book I read: I still haven't finished There's No Such Thing as an Easy Job Kikuko Tsumura I started back in January, lmao. Not for any reason other than I just haven't been in the right headspace to sit down and read for the past few months--What I have read of it is great, so hopefully, I can make the time to pick it up again.

Greatest literary inspirations: I like the female protags in Karin Slaughter novels, and I love Tanya Huff's Torin Kerr from her Confederation series--I'm sure they've inspired me on some level. Oh, and Phedre from Jacqueline Carey's Kushiel books, too, although it's been ages since I read those. But I think most of my inspiration actually comes from other forms of media. I love the action babes of the late 90s/early 00s: Lara Croft is the number one inspo here, and pretty much all of Michael Turner's comic girls but especially Sara from Witchblade. And I think Better Call Saul is easily one of the best-written shows ever made--That's one I always go back to when I feel like I need to refill the inspo well.

Things in my current fandoms I want to read but I don't want to write: I have a confession: I usually only read a ton of fic when I first get into a fandom and I can't get enough and I just want to soak it all up, but after a certain point, I just don't have a lot of headspace for other people's stories. 😬 I feel bad about it sometimes, and it's not like I never read anything after that point, but 90% of the time, what I wanna write is what I wanna read. It's kind of a closed loop, I guess.

Things in my current fandoms I want to write but I think nobody would be interested in them but me: Well, I'm not at all deterred by being the only person interested in something I write, haha. One of my favorite one-shots I've ever written is between my Cousland and Hawke meeting briefly at Ostagar, and it's probably my least popular fic on AO3 by a big margin. But I do like deep-diving into my own OCs, and it generally is harder to get an audience for fic that doesn't have canon characters. Ain't gonna stop me, though!

You can recognize my writing by: Lots of pining and banter; obvious thesaurus abuse

My most controversial take (current fandom): Yeah, no, not gonna be sharing my actual most controversial takes, lmao.

But I do also love the Devil ending! I don't think there's one objectively "best" ending--What's good for one V isn't necessarily good for another--But for my Valerie, it suited her story the best. I love the poetry of her going back to Arasaka after getting fired by them, I love storming Arasaka Tower with Goro, I love the conflict with Johnny, I love making Goro confront how fucked up the Arasakas are, I love the possibilities of Mikoshi--The only way it would have been better for me is if this nixed idea had actually been put into action.

And I wish we could roleplay a V that is actually more "pro"-corpo in the game, especially if we had the corpo lifepath. Sticking it to the man is sexy and all, but I just love delving into characters that align themselves with shitty institutions and exploring different motivations (I personally like cynical pragmatism/self-preservation and delusional idealism) that lead a person there.

Top three favorite tropes: 1) Rivals to friends to lovers 2) Mutual pining 3) Forced proximity

What’s your current writing mood (10 – super motivated and churning out words like crazy, 0 – in a complete rut): Like, 0.5, lmao. I've been rereading and organizing my WIPS, so there's some effort being put in there, but I'm very much in one of my "ummmm, how do I even write fiction?" phases.

Share a random frustration: I have ZERO discipline when it comes to writing. I need to be in a fully feral, totally isolated from distractions place or I just can't get shit done. When I'm in the zone, I'm in the fuckin' zone, but I get like 3 months of that every 5 years, lmao.

Tagging (with no pressure, as always) @ur-friendly-nbhd-cardassian, @dread-red-queen, @vorchagirl, and @aceghosts <333

[furubatsu]

As some of you may have seen with my timeline, I've been getting a little frustrated with both the fandom and Larian's treatment of Wyll Ravengard.

So I ended up posting a feedback form to them and I guess I wanted to share it here too because I was stewing on getting some of my thoughts and feelings out about Wyll for a little bit now and the XBOX animation kinda gave me the kick up the arse to do it. Might elaborate further when it's not Half-Past Midnight and I got up at 6am.

Wyll Ravengard's character suffers from being rewritten so late into production and it sadly shows with him, from his romance route being notably lacking in both significant moments that other routes get, to simple dialogue options or changes all the way to his own personal quest that has much less significance or presence in the main story than Lae'zel, Shadowheart or Astarion. The last minute rewrite also makes some moments with him feel disjointed, such as the treatment of his relationship with Mizora, in Early Access it was implied, if not outright stated that he was in a relationship with her while in the released game he clearly despises her for the abuse she's given him over the years, yet the narrative treats it like it's not a big deal, even allowing the player to sleep with her (I'm not suggesting you remove that option, after all, it's up to the player's choice) but the inability to remove her from the camp leaves an odd and uncomfortable feeling for a lot of female players (if for example, Wyll and Mizora's genders were swapped and it was a male abuser just hanging around his female victim and trying to seduce her lover/friend, it would be a very different vibe), even the XBOX announcement animation, protrays Wyll as being into Mizora. Best I can suggest is, either decide just what Wyll's conflict with Mizora is, whether he accepts that the power she gave him has made him the man he is today, for better or worse, or an abuser he needs to be rescued from. Heck, you could even recycle his romance scene from Early Access where she gets in the way of an intimate scene because of his scrying eye to show how she isolates him! Wyll isn't the only one who suffers from this, it's clear that Halsin hasn't got much to do after the Shadowfell/Moonrise Tower Questline, not even a conversation with the Refugees or that one Druid in the city trying to revive a tree, but it stands out the most with Wyll and it's such a shame that a character that had so much promise has been handicapped by time constraints. Hopinng this leads to at least something, and thanks for this game.

Edit 1: Where you can leave feedback if you wanna say something too

[gamblegun]

just wanted to pop in and say that i appreciate your blog, it has given me so much comfort, but i will totally understand and respect you if you delete it. im sorry for all of the hate you've gotten and had to see.

i've been really struggling with how trans men are treated currently and our historical erasure/non-inclusion lately. if i can be completely candid i feel like i no longer belong under the label "trans" and it honestly causes me discomfort. but i'm not cis either. i won't ever go off of T or be a woman or anything like that. i love my body but i don't love being in this community. i honestly can't even connect with the flag anymore. i tried but this recent outpouring of hate has made me realize how forced i felt.

i don't belong and at this point i dont want to mold myself into someone who does. i don't want to be the kind of person that antitransmasc trans people begrudgingly tolerate. i desperately wish i had some kind of third word or third space outside of all of this where i could just exist as a man. i don't care what i am "technically". i just want to be a man and to be left alone about it, not "cis or trans" but Just Some Guy.

reading your thoughts has made me feel less alone as I struggle with this mentality. i haven't found an answer and i doubt anyone will propose or make anything like what i want. but i just wanted to sincerely say. thank you. i would unironically send you $10 if I could (all the spare change I have right now.)

i may privately save some of your posts to re-read when i feel isolated and unheard. if that's not alright please feel free to enforce that boundary and i will respect it.

Hey, first of all I'm sorry you're going through that. I'm glad that my blog has brought some comfort to you, and I hope that wherever you end up and however you decide to conceptualize your identity, you find it fulfilling and peaceful. It's tough rn, I have trouble walking away from this discussion, especially since it tends to jump scare me when I'm engaging with fandom stuff, but a couple months break made me feel better, so I'd suggest setting it down and doing something you enjoy instead if you can. However, I know it isn't really all that simple since a lot of this pertains to irl problems, even just general transmasc isolation, so no judging if you struggle with disengaging. I haven't officially decided to delete this blog, it was mostly a vent post tbh, but feel free to save posts. I have long accepted that whatever I'm sending out into the internet will exist somewhere forevermore lol.

I currently haven't set up anything that I feel like is anonymous enough for my Inflammatory Opinions Blog, and even though I am very open to receiving money lol, I wouldn't want to take your last ten bucks. I'd rather you get a treat for yourself. Personally, I got myself a slice of tres leches cake after work today, it was delicious.

[crush3dmary]

20 questions writer meme

I stole this. Feel free to steal it too if you want.

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

37

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

364,141

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Yugioh DM and Tales of! Mostly Symphonia and formerly Crestoria (rip).

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Darling Lagomorph (crestoria) at 155 Weltschmerz (symphonia) at 133 Philosophy of a Knife (ygodm) at 94 Fear's Ascent (crestoria) at 83 Have You Seen Me? (crestoria) at 78

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I really struggle with this to be honest, if I get a really long comment or someone saying the fic was really impactful I try to respond but honestly I usually just leave it and reply elsewhere if I know the author unless someone is actually asking something/wants more info about something. This is basically just because I'm busy but also in part due to my old dA fame (bleh) getting me in the bad habit of never replying to anything.

6. What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Probably In the arms of the heretic (ygodm) that fic really means a lot to me though and I think because of the premise it worked.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I'd have to say Absurdities and Echoes (symphonia) poor Zelos deserves it after everything else I put him through in that series. Sorry about your ring finger.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I've gotten a couple rude comments but it's basically been curbed ever since I turned off guest comments on my works. You can say it with accountability or not at all. Most recently I got a moralizing comment from someone about Ryou being 16 in Philosophy because of the smut that kind of had implications I didn't like but that's about it.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I used to write a lot of crestoria smut on my alt account (IYKYK) but I will sometimes include it as a framing device to develop character relationships. There's quite a bit of smut in Philosophy for example because loneliness and isolation are such big themes for Ryou and Bakura, but generally if I post something with smut to my main account it's because it's relevant to the story or develops the character relationships.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I have a proper Symphonia/Crestoria crossover in the works that's a continuation of TOC game canon, but I've been at a standstill with my Tales works lately so it's pretty far off from being posted unfortunately. But I hope you guys give a chance once it's up, because the lore is SUPER cool.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

A certain someone who knows who they are has either plagiarized or bastardized lines from some of my popular crestoria works but other than that no.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not yet but it would be cool!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes! Charles and I did a collab PITY // PIETY earlier this year and it absolutely slaps! Luisa and I are also working on an art/fic collab right now that I hoe to have posted by the end of the year but we'll see... sometimes life has other plans.

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

Zelloyd's gotta take the cake for this one sorry fam. When it's been your otp for 15 years nothing can ever top it. But for yugioh it's a tie between thief/tender/angst I like any combo of those three.

15. What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

I try to finish everything I start, but I've got a couple Tales WIPs that I'm having trouble finding the spark for. It's not that I don't think they'll ever be finished, but it might be a while until they see the light of day.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I think I really succeed when it comes to imagery and descriptive prose, plus getting inside characters' heads. I want to make people feel things with my work. I think the reason Philosophy and Darling Lagomorph are some of my best and most popular is because they're an opportunity for me to show off those strengths where I excel most.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

World building. I hate doing infodumps but I really struggle to include lore in ways that don't come off that way. This is a big reason I've never made the dive into original fiction (for now, I'm in the planning stages for my first novel. Stay tuned.)

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

The only time I've ever done it is when writing Yuna from Crestoria because she includes random french in canon too. I also did a french title for the latest chapter of Philosophy which was kind of fun. I think it's something you can swing if you're prepared to do your research but if not, avoid avoid avoid.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Tales of Symphonia. The things I put Zelos through, man. If you think I'm bad now you should have seen me at 14.

20. Favorite fic you've written?

If I had to choose just one probably Philosophy of a Knife, because like I said earlier, I get to combine all of my strengths into something I feel really proud of. I think I picked the perfect time in my "writing career", so to speak, to work on it because I feel like the writing style is very cohesive and it seems to have resonated with a lot of people so far, which makes me very happy. I hope you guys continue to enjoy my work going forward!

[leng-m]

Hey folks, there might be some noticeable changes on my blog soon. TL;DR this will no longer be just a writeblr for me, but a place where I post all kinds of things.

The context is that I've been really struggling with social media lately, and Tumblr being my primary platform, I feel like a lot of it has something to do with this website. I don't know what it is; the vibes are different, or maybe I'm just looking for a different way to engage online. I even ended up making accounts on Dreamwidth and BlueSky, but I don't want to abandon the community I found here, so I'm trying to find a way to make Tumblr work for me again.

I'm going to discontinue my @sugarcoats-and-heartbeats blog. A lot of the things I reblog there are related to fandom and books and art, things that I feel actually reveal a lot about my tastes and inspirations as a writer. I feel like the @leng-m blog is much too constrained to Filipino culture and my original works, which at one point was what helped me focus, but now it feels like it's too boxed in. Being a Filipino isn't the only part of my identity. I even reblogged other people's writeblr content on sugarcoats, which isolated my blog even further from the writeblr community. So really, I was just making things tough for myself.

So to make things easier, I'll just have one blog that will contain all my works, reblogs of fandom-related stuff, and reblogs of art and other people's writing. I can understand if some of the things I post will not be your cup of tea; it's completely fine if you feel the need to unfollow. I'm hoping this will streamline my experience a little to make social media feel more engaging and less of a chore.