#id put it under a read more but im on mobile ! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

eiinsamkeit-archive · 2 years

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if the last year has proven anything is that this will all just get worse. soso many times of me thinking it has to get better now right? its time for just a tiny bit of luck, please. just to be met with more the next day, and the next week, on and on without end. i don't know how a mentally healthy person would be able to manage it nonetheless someone like me, with no one to help, no support system or anything.

#rain rambles.#like shit i knew i was lonely but all of this just really proved me right in every way #idk anyone else who has NO ONE to call when they feel bad or ask for help when they need it #except for me #i dont have anyone #and the older i get the more i realise it will always stay that way #its just so hard to accept bc i know im not meant to be alone #i crave community & family & love #id put this under a read more but my laptop has gone to the afterlife #& we all know u cant do that shit on mobile

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commander-damneron · 2 years

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I get that it's just kinda how life goes, but I'm honestly kinda mad that I've been relegated to being the 5th wheel of my d&d group. Like, it's not their fault, they obviously don't have to consider me in their relationship stuff, but when the table consists of two people who are somewhere between exes and qpps, and two people who aren't technically dating yet because they've not actually gone on a date together but are functionally sort of already a couple, it's just... it's kind of a bummer. And it's totally irrational because it genuinely hasn't affected anything gamewise, but I keep worrying it will, and beyond that I know I have baggage about being considered the "extra" friend, the one that people let hang around them because otherwise they'd be sad and pathetic and alone but no one really likes them or likes having them around, and I know this group get that because we've spoken before about how a lot of us have issues around that, but I'm just really scared that they'll be too wrapped up in couple stuff to notice or care and just. On top of all of it I'm terrified that it's going to lead to me being kind of off, either in person or in game, and then I'm the one dragging everyone down and I'm just kind of dumping all of this on tumblr because the people I usually complain to about this stuff and are cool about it because they're also mostly some flavour of ace and/or aro are the people I'm talking about and I don't want to be the guy who's like "how dare you be in a happy relationship when I am not", but just. It is just kind of a bummer

#I'm just gonna leave this as it is bc I could probably vent about this in circles for a long ass time #id have put this under a read more except i never actually figured out how to on mobile and i don't have the energy to learn rn #and i get that this is all kinda hypocritical bc i do like someone in my other d&d group #but im just so scared its going to end up as #'the dm and their partner plus the dm's best friend and his gf and also the guy we keep around to pad out the numbers'#and i logically know it wont and im just traumaing all over this #but it doesnt help that the last time i got caught in a catastrophising spiral i turned out to be right

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vidoe-gaem · 2 years

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Idk where else to vent so I guess I'll do it here sorry yall

TW: weight loss, illness, medical stuff, etc.

I need surgery but they still haven't called me to schedule it. Both times I've been to the ER I'm told it sucks but it's not an emergency despite me being at a weight I haven't seen since I genuinely don't know when. I'm getting too weak to even walk places. It took 2 visits and arguing for them to even do the test where they found a cyst in me. Everything hurts and I can't stop crying. I feel like I'm just gonna waste away in my apartment waiting for it to get better. I don't know what to do. This is happening right after my car broke down, my job cut my hours. It feels like the world is just crashing in on me lol.

#im sorry #id put this under a read more if i knew how to on mobile #posting this on tumblr will solve nothing but it feels nice to yell into the void #they didnt even want surgery at first they were like we typically monitor these for 6 weeks #it took me breaking down in front of the dr and sobbing that i wanted to eat again for her to consider it #im just tired of having to argue to be taken care of #tw #tw weight #tw weightloss #tw surgery #tw medicine #idk how else to tag this sorry #not very video game of me

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espytalks · 2 years

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Gonna complain about a dumb mug i have real quick

Ok so like. I got this as a gift maybe a year or so ago, and right off the bat i didnt like it much.

Its a perfectly useable mug, its a good size, typical handle shape, and keeps warm about as well as any other cup. Borderline average on useability. Its also minimal in design, basic, boring, but inoffensive.

Except for the fact its a "correcting your grammar" joke.

Like, we see it all the time on the internet. People make one dumb mistake in grammer, possibly due to auto correct or being not as fluent in english, and some entitled douchebag has to make the entire argument about how smart they are cause they know the difference between "your" and "you're".

I used to be that kinda person, actually, pre-internet. When i was a young kid who was very booksmart and had little actual social knowledge. Fortunately i wasnt a nuisance cause i never actually talked to anyone to be annoying about it, but i remember a time in my life when i woulda felt accomplished by correcting a grammer mistake.

Young me would blow a gasket knowing how many typos i made making this post. I corrected them as i saw em, and i proofread, but still. I used to care a lot more about it.

This mug i think is supposed to be a quick joke. "Someone who is a bit smart and knows when someone else is making a mistake". I think its supposwd to be a compliment. A shallow, surface level joke.

But because i have obsessive fuckin compulsive disorder i gotta overthink the meaning of this shit.

Cause, like, it looks at first glance like im correcting someone else. Im pretty sure thats the intended joke. But then you think about who's holding it (me, presumably) and it turns itself around.

Now, assuming its something that i am saying to you, its like you're correcting me. In this scenario, im judging you, but im also making the exact mistakes im accusing you of. A pot calling the kettle black situation. Which would be funny, actually! Ironic humor! I get the joke!

But if that is the intent, i really dont fancy the implication im a pretentious douche. I really think I've changed, so this cup feels like an insult, actually.

Its not, though! I know who gave it to me, someone who knows im a kind and thoughtful person! Who also would be inclined to buy a nice mug for her tea-drinking daughter cause she giggled at a cheap joke.

It loops back around to find a third meaning, which i haven't quite figured out words for yet. A cheep joke owned by someone whos bad at sarcasm, but smart enough to know as stupid at it makes me feel, its really not a big deal.

Noone else would think this about this mug. Noone else will get the irony i see past the surface level humor.

Im making a mountain outta a molehill, just like a person correcting a small grammatical mistake.

#espy talks #im on mobile otherwise id put it under a read more

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deedala · 1 year

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🌱Macy's Tag Game Twosday🌿 (x2 actually because i have some other tag games i need to catch up on and im mashing them all togther in one post) so thank you for tagging me to play one or more of these following tag games!! @celestialmickey @crossmydna @mmmichyyy @creepkinginc @lingy910y @energievie @suzy-queued @metalheadmickey @mickeysgaymom @ardent-fox @m4ndysk4nkovich @rereadanon @mikhailoisbaby @tanktopgallavich @scurvgirl 💖💖💖 name: deanna🌱

your birthday: Nov 17

where in the world are you? O Hi O 🌽

when did you join tumblr? 2011

do you have any sideblogs? yeah not very active though

mobile or desktop? both both both

your perfect sleeping conditions: 70 degrees, flannel comforter, face mask and bonnet, cozy sweatshirt and socks. Yes i sleep in fuzzy socks dont at me.

a movie you think everyone should see at least once: hmmm... The Fall (2006)

what shoes do you wear the most often? slip on sneakers

describe your keys to me: key to my house with a pink cover, key to my parents house with no cover, my car key, my husbands spare car key, a loop wrist strap made from a piece of a limited run woven baby wrap design that was dedicated to the FB babywearing group i helped found like 8 million years ago, and my red wallet attached by TWO carabiners because listen you just never know when you'll need a second carabiner. Also i have a picture of my kids in the little wallet window where you're supposed to put your ID (ig?) 😊

find the book closest to you. turn to page 7. what’s the 7th word? "was"

what’s your favorite snack? popcorn

one of your aspirations: inner peace

and finally, tell me a random fact about yourself: ive been white water rafting a few times. as a youth...i dont think i'd ever go again though lol

rest of the tag games under the cut!

next up this picrew

(i need a fucking hair cut)

Favorites Collage: (as always my favorites change based on mood and day but these are pretty common favorites!!)

animal: house finch movie: The Fall (2006) season: autumn character: today right now its Mickey color: mint hobby: vidja gams book: The Masked Empire by Patrick Weekes song: The Boxer by Simon and Garfunkel drink: lemonade

and finally... this or that? ABO or Soulmates // fake dating or secret dating // fix-it or post-canon // mutual pining or friends-to-lovers // slow burn or angst // smut or romance // Reality TV au or Porn au //Enemies to lovers or Enemies to friends to lovers // Domestic Fluff or Hurt/Comfort // Coffee Shop au or College au // one-shot or multi-chapter // Crossover or canon compliant // mpreg or adoption // online romance or workplace romance // single parent au or sports au // neighbours or roommates // sci-fi au or magic au i was thinking of picking fix-it..but i think the fix-it type things i usually end up reading fall more under AU canon divergent rather than what is probably simply fix-it. also excuse me but smut IS romantic imo lolol. also also slow burn tends to be angsty so i felt like i could secretly pick both of those by picking slow burn haha.

and okay time to tag some nuggets to do any or all of these games!! 😆 Everyone up top + @harrowhark-a-vagrant @michellemisfit @too-schoolforcool @juliakayyy @heymrspatel @gallawitchxx @callivich @thepupperino @transmickey @grumble-fish @gardenerian @imikhailo @jrooc @milkmaidovich @grossmickey @sleepyfacetoughguy @themarchg1rl @sickness-health-all-that-shit @babygirlmickey @sweetbee78 @xninetiestrendx @vintagelacerosette @purplemagpie @squidyyy23 @sirrudo @alihendrjx + anyone else seeing this and wanting to play a thing 😋

#tag game tuesday #tag game #picrew

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tank-and-tiny · 1 year

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Heya! Nice to be here and meet folks. Been told by a couple'a people that this is a good place for supernaturals to get to know each other.

Name's Rory Walsh and here in my picture is my lovely itty bitty named Stella!

((OOC info under the cut, pinned post))

another blog by me, bunny, the person who came out of nowhere swinging SEMI-LUKEWARM

rory will randomly blip out of existence with my motivation and energy levels!

i tag the following:

blood // gif needles anatomical hearts bats deep ocean

since mobile is a fuck, heres the ooc page info put here

my name is bunny, im 25+, i do not want to be addressed

im also over on crow, honey, the beast, who else do i have uhhh null? and julia’s blogs

id like to avoid the tumblr chat “function” as much as possible, especially ic, i do not receive any kind of notification that i have a new message and it will not update with new messages unless i manually refresh the page. it leads to miscommunication and me missing things frequently and i dont like that.

additionally, i am no longer given activity notifications, so communicating through replies on a post is a good way to have me not see it! please reblog whenever possible if you want to have a conversation

if you talk regularly with honey or null and we are mutuals you can talk to me ooc/ask for my discord,, if i draw you things i am trying to be friends, but i am not very good at being friends and do not have much to offer

im not Extremely picky with who i follow, but i have people whos judgement i trust and will block freely and without hesitation. im here to curate my ideal experience, not save the feelings of a stranger.

while i understand that ic=/=ooc if your character spews blatant bigotry of any kind please dont interact, actually

this page does not accept magic anons

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Rory Walsh was born in Ireland and moved to Texas at the age of 13

he is 37 years old, 6'2”, approx 265 lbs

he is a werewolf and i will not read pretty much anything about wod garou actually, you cannot make me read, that being said osmosis works and so does polite conversation

age 13 rory moves to america age 20 rory meets saffron juniper age 22 rory and sj start dating age 32 rory and sj get married age 33 sj becomes pregante/stella is born age 34 sj is diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer age 35 sj passes away

rory is a football coach for tykes and teaches PE at an elementary school

stella is 4 years old and does not speak! she will make sounds, like barking and awoooing, but she does speak very well with American and Irish sign language which rory is also fluent in

her favourite bedtime story is goodnight moon

will add more if i can think of anything

#family album #((#artsy shit

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lilmaymayy · 9 months

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hey friends! this is just a quick intro post in case you want to know a bit more about me/the blog🤭

** DISCLAIMER**

PLEASE BE KIND in this blog i will not entertain ANY hate/aggressive/mean interactions THEY WILL BE DELETED OR IGNORED, in the past where i did respond, it never left my mind and i never knew how to react, leaving me to be negatively affected by someones fleeting thoughts. so to avoid anyones displeasure please be respectful and conscious of your actions and words!! if not- 👉🚪we dont need that energy here

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*im also on mobile so apologies for any bad formatting😭😭

hello! my nicknames may and i use she/her pronouns. when sending any msgs id appreciate a quick hello but as long as your being polite i will gladly respond. feel free to address me as may or any other (kind) phrase (e.g queen/baddie?? anythings fine as long as youre being nice)

do u see the theme😘

i like to keep my age off of here simply for privacy but i can assure you i am not a minor, but if you are, you are welcome on my page any time just be aware i do swear and the content that i reblog can be nsfw, but ultimately you are responsible for the media you decide to consume.

i do not write fics(i always reblog them tho😉/also beta! so if youre a writer in need just lmk) idk if i ever will(write)but i dont realistically see that happening😭.

in the search bar for my page you can see all these hashtags, i typically tag “give it a read💋” for any fics ive betad and “she speaks🗣️” for any post thats just me yappin💀

and any character names (like finnick odair, peter parker etc.) are the bulk of fics that i reblog and you can find works for that character under those tags!

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im a full time student based in sunny california😍, my favorite things have to be fruits(tops gotta be strawberrys, cherrys anddd green grapes), fics, and folklore (3 fav f’s💋) (and yes i am a swiftie). last time i took the personality test i got ISTJ, but i swearr im still an infp. every single test i took told me i was a hufflepuff (were not lame i swear), and even though i swear up n down that im a laurie.. i might be an amy😔( i want to be great or nothing😫) and a song that i just feel for is probably a three way tie between teenage dream by olivia rodrigo, this is me trying by taylor swift and dreamer by laufey(not someone i typically listen to but whenever spotify puts her song i always love it)

favorite artistss gotta be the big three taylor, lana and ariana (nothing offish theyre just my most listened) and drake.. and bad bunny.. and olivia.. and sza.. and beyonce.. and the weekend.. and rihanna

- if you want a grasp of my music this is a LINK to my most played playlist

- this is a LINK to my more lovey/ sweet songs, its all in the description💋

*if u give em a listen and u wanna put me on.. msg me!! id love to hear your recs

my hobbies include playing music, i play guitar(kinda goodish) and i wanted to pick up piano too (idk if ill ever get to this😭) i also found that i love to do puzzles, and i wanted to start scrapbooking (looks fun af lowk). a few other things i love is definitely just jamming out to my tunes, sleeping😫😫, watching movies, playing w legos😭, PLAYING WITH MY DOGGIESSS (i have two, rocky and lily both are maltese poodles💋💋), baking (hate the clean up tho) i also love selfcare, its always good to prioritize urself but i mean the cassie method of everything showers, lotions, body oils, body mists/ perfumes, face masks, skin care (allllllll the goodies) just to finish the day off with a fic (its deadass my nightly routine to shower, get ready for bed/unwind, tumblr)

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now onto.. CELEBRITY CRUSHES!!

-CELEBRITY not character, but if i missed any lmk😝

-this is a long one so bearrrrr with me

my top 5 currently is🥁🥁🥁

1. sam claflin (been obsessed, still obsessed, i dont see this changing *unless timothee wanna quit playin🙄)

2. tom blyth (tbosbas was life changing.. hes so💋💋)

3. andrew garfield (im considering moving my man up to 2 bc hes an og for this list likee hes been on my brain since he was fan casted as our remus lupin and will stay there😌)

4. jacob elordi (newest addition, saltburn edits is the sole reason why hes here plus hes so fucking tall like i deserve that height difference *for reference im 5 ft😈)

5. timothee chalamet (i love him so much BUT HES DOWN HERE BC OF KYLIE😭*he would be 1 otherwise🥲)

for other hotties ..

OSCAR ISAAC🥵🥵😫-i need this man in bed rn

charlie brushnell😘-new addition but again he is taking over just like pjo is

tom holland- zenny baby he is all yours but that man shirtless? YUMMYYY

tom hiddleston- only rzn to watch the thor series

theo james - YOU THE ONE FOUR ME hes so fine i watched divergent (still a great series) for him n i was not dissapointed

aaron t— johnson- i do not want to mention his 🤐 but he is so fine his calvin klein ads?? KICKASS??

ben barnes- shadow n bone.. YUMMY YUMMY🤭🤭also sirius? likeee runaway to my house?

cillian murphy- ik he lowk looks like he got a bad case of botox.. BUT CMONNN PEAKY BLINDERS???

callum turner- i knew i was hooked since that harry potter movie he has like 10 minutes in🥰🥰

dylan o’brien-ima be honest im not DIE HARD in love but this man was fine since maze runner and teen wolf n will be till hes in the graveee

henry cavill- enola mf holmes.. INTRODUCE ME TO YOUR BROTOHER LIKE😍😍😍 i need this man to investigate all my internal organs

hugh laughton scott- hes just so pretty i just😘

harrison dickinson- love at first sight of darkest minds😍😍( its a discontinued movie (supposed to be) series) i need him in more shit

joao felix- my bestie pmo fifa AND HE DOES NOT DISSAPOINTT

josh hutcherson- i could not make this list without pookie

matthew gray gubler- i need him to read me to sleep, sing me to sleep, talk about anything so i can sleep, he brings me so much joy with that smile and hes so sweetie pie i could go on forever

robert pattinson- TEAM EDWARD FOR LIFEEEEEEEE

drew starkey?- idk his name but hes the hottie who plays rafe cameron IVE NEVER WATCHED THE SHOW (or anything hes in) but holy shit that man is tall and pulls off ANY hair cut

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well if youve made it this far thank you for taking the time to read this! if you want to know some more about me msg me in any way and ill respond, maybe ill add that info here. thanks again for your attention! love you all😘

#she speaks🗣️#introduction #whole explanation for what happens here #lmk if smt needs more elaboration ig?#but thanks for clicking!!!

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judicator · 1 year

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I mourn these turn of events...

- | ⚖️ judicator ⚖️ | private . sem-selective. low activity -|Neuvillette rp blog | - - | Sideblog to ruinlost | -

- |Oc,multimuse,& crossover friendly!| -

-|Carrd (wip)|-

Blogroll: @fortecircuit wuwa multi

- |Rules Doc|About doc | -

Guidelines for mobile!:

>Selectivity

I'm not too selective about who I follow and interact with ,though I still usually try to stick to staying to interact with mutuals only!

>triggers

I do my best to tag things properly!,but Please, let me know if I need to tag anything,This blog may contain semi-dark themes,violence and language.!I'm forgetful so I sometimes forget to tag certain things!,as for myself I dont have many triggers all I ask for is trypohobia & images or roaches to be tagged!

>Dni if

Racist or are anti lgbtqa+,that behavior is not welcomed here ,

>Extra info

Please trim your posts if they get too long or if you can!, it gets cluttered,I understand the struggle of it if you are on mobile but please try to do so!

If we are mutuals and you wanna talk more outside of rp please dont hesitate to ask for my discord!

Personal blogs are free to follow. I dont really mind,just PLEASE do not reblog my posts or try to rp with one-if so you will be soft or hard blocked ;;/!

This blog will most likely contain spoilers to ongoing story quests & events in genshin ,they will however be tagged as well as put under a read more,so please keep this in mind!

>Crossovers & Au’s & oc’s

I love crossovers and au’s so much, please if you ever have an idea for and au dont be afraid to reach out!,or wanna chuck another muse from elsewhere at me please feel free!

As for oc’s I love them hence why this blog is here so please Id love to learn & interact with yours!,!

>Godmodding

No Godmodding,,unless we have planned something ahead of time regarding something happening to my muse,please control your own muse ;;/!

>Replies

In regards to replies I'm really fine with and length !,I myself usually end up leaning towards shorter paragraphs ,so please dont feel like you have to ever match my writing length!

>Mun ≠ Muse

I do not condone my muse’s actions,anything they say or do is not something I would usually say or do myself!

>Misc

I have ADD so I tend to get distracted and forget things pretty fast as well as Irl things,so please know if I haven't replied to a thread or I'm not ignoring you. I most likely forgot,don't hesitate to poke me if I take too long responding!

This goes the same for rp replies my activity is somewhat sporadic at times;;/

Hiya!,im velvet or panda whichever you prefer,I am 24 and vibing im nonbinary & any pronouns are fine by me !,Ive been rping for a few years here on tumblr now,i'm pretty quiet and chill most times!//

#[pinned;do not rb please!]

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hijohshiki-roc · 5 years

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Mom passed away a couple of hours ago and after crying my eyes out I feel relieved. She was a fighter till the last day and passed away peacefully in her sleep surrounded by family. After 7 years of fighting cancer she finally gets to rest now. That’s all she wanted in the end after all a peaceful death and to be known as a fighter. Thank you anybody that read this I just needed to write it somewhere.

#death mention #id put it under a read more but im on mobile

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thebeardedladyofthelake · 3 years

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My friend @cant-even-throw-straight asked me to Spamton-ify the Navy SEAL Copypasta. Never one to back down from a challenge I did just that.

(text boxes generated here:

https://www.demirramon.com/generators/undertale_text_box_generator )

#deltarune #spamton #spamton g. spamton #navy seal copypasta #ill tack on a text version later #but i want to put it under a read more because this is long enough #and im on mobile #this took longer than id like to admit #so you guys better appreciate it #my memes

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mushroom-winners-proof · 3 years

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honestly sora is so valid for reacting the way he did to seeing riku for the first time in KH2

like imagine being 14 and already having to deal with the drama of KH in general, but then your best friend just slowly starts to become more warped and vile- him even starting to show resentment towards you seemingly out of nowhere until he just gets straight-up possessed and for all you know he’s completely gone at that point

but then you get a glimmer of hope that he is back to himself, that he doesn’t actually hate you as much as you mught’ve thought he did- only for him to be shut behind a door that you personally have to close and lock and that’s the last thing you want reopened to ensure the safety of Literally Everyone

and good for sora that he doesnt remember anything from castle oblivion because can you imagine running into your friend after thinking he could be lost to the darkness for good only for him to act the exact same, nasty way you thought he conquered? And his words bite more somehow: he tells you you never cared about him, insisting that you’re such a pest for trying to “worm into” his heart, acting as though you’re the worst thing to ever happen to him after all you’ve been through. If that isnt it then seeing his brain get fucked with twice right in front of you only to find out that it wasn’t even actually him the whole time and your real best friend is still lost to the darkness

but disregardig the C.O. events on account of not remembering them, just imagine running into your best friend after stressing and panicking and searching everywhere for him only to mistake him for the guy you thought you killed a year ago- the guy who possessed your friend and caused so much hell. Even more, he doesnt even try to reunite with you: it takes your other friend to call out to him and literally drag him back for you to realize its him: he had intentions on just leaving you to wonder what happened to him after all this time without a word of clarity. What do you think: did ansem/xehanort actually come back? Did he ultimately take over riku’s body in the end- but if so then why help him and kairi? Imagine not getting the answers to those and while this guy’s running around you’re left stuck wondering if you’ll ever see your friend again

like my god sora is so valid to breakdown after seeing riku in KH2

#long post #i would like to formally apologize for not being able to put this under a read more im on mobile and i dont believe in drafts #snap chats #hey :)#i have so many thoughts #like so many my brain is FRIED #i love CoM can i just say #it sucks that sora doesnt remember what happens but its definitely for the better #still i want my angst- i mean i get it in repliku and riku Period #also everything that happened in 358/2 was a result of that and yall that game broke me #my thoughts are all jambled but what im saying is sora’s reaction makes total sense #like with kairi he knew she was going to be alright- he knew where she was #with riku it was only optimism that gave him reason to think hed see him again #AND THEN WHEN HE SEES HIM ITS NOT EVEN HIM ITS ANSEM/XEHANORT #and listen the final boss/es of KH1 made me violent id cry too if i saw my best friend embody him #all in all KH is wack but it hurts me and i adore it so #i wanna write something for CoM so bad but i dont know how to execute it #i have had so many thoughts for a while about KH in general so lets see if i spam posts in the coming days #anyways im about to sleep sorry for voming my rambling onto all ye

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kai-the-mad · 3 years

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My lower back and legs hurt so bad that standing, walking, or even sitting for any length of time is absolutely excruciating and results in me spending the rest of the day in bed because it's the only place where I don't hurt as bad

I broke down sobbing today because I feel like my mom, who also has a bad back, prioritizes her back pain to the point where I can't even talk to her without it turning into some sort of competition or ignores the fact that I am struggling in the first place

#kai shush #usually id hide this under a read more but it's nearly 5am im hurting im exhausted and i don't give a shit #i have shitty body syndrome and the only cure is to take me behind the shed and put me down like a lame horse #and it hurts me because the one person i thought I could talk to doesn't seem to listen when it isnt convenient for her #i... i think i should look into mobility aides #im very tired #im very sad #im in pain #i wish this was all a bad dream

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essercipertuttienonperse · 3 years

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you don’t have to answer this if it’s too invasive and personal but how did you know you were ace, what was you personal journey figuring it out? i’ve been wondering if i’m ace or not and whenever i try to really self reflect and research stuff on the internet i just end up more confused and sad. do you have any word of advice? ty have a safe drive!!

hi! don't worry it's not too invasive and I'm honored that you asked me!!

it wasn't easy for me either! I think I only put it in my bio like a little more than a year ago bc I was definitely not sure about it for the longest time! personally I kinda always just felt like I was feeling a bit different about the whole thing than the rest of my friends/people around me. when ppl around me started talking about sex more often I was always like umhhh *slowly walks away* shdjjd and I never liked watching sex scenes in movies (im always either uncomfortable or indifferent) . for a long time I just thought that I'd grow to like it eventually and maybe I was just taking a bit longer but I never did. for a period I also tried to force myself into that stuff even if I didn't like it because I wanted to be "normal" and also because I thought oh you never know until you try! looking back that is not an approach I'd recommend, at least not in the way I did it. I'd basically just go clubbing with my friends and get drunk enough to be able to do that stuff and I remember just being angry at myself because I couldn't even get myself to like making out with people! but to me it really just felt like... idk not bad bad but also not good at all and I was very like detached from the whole thing. eventually the whole getting drunk in clubs with drunk guys thing made me end up in a bad situation as it often does and that was kind of my wake-up call to stop doing that and stop trying to force myself to like those things and from there on it was a journey to try and accept myself as I am! around a year later I found this fandom and personally that helped me a lot because I didn't even know there was a name for this feeling and that there were actual people out there feeling like me! and I also started to read more about it and to try to understand it better (I think youtube videos with actual ace people were really helpful at least for me!). at first I think fear held me back a lot bc I was scared it would mean I'll never be happy/loved/normal and for some reason I also felt like what I was feeling wasn't "enough" to "earn" that label and the acceptance/love/pride from the lgbt community (which is not really how it works but my mind wasn't really aware of that zjjz) and I think it helps when you understand that it's really not a death sentence! you can absolutely be happy and have a nice life just like everyone else can (well we're all trying at least lol) and also it's not as final as it may seem at first because I think it's a spectrum and things can change over time and that's ok! in my opinion just because you find comfort and belonging in a community/label right now it doesn't mean you have to stay there forever (and it also doesn't mean that you're "faking" it now if you do end up changing!). also there isn't just one way of being ace and you don't have to like fulfill a list of things to be ace or stuff like that! it took me a while to understand all this and also to be ok with it! and I'm still working on it tbh like I have never said it to anyone irl yet so that tells you a lot sjsj but yeah I'm just trying my best<3 and I think that there's no rush you know? i think the biggest lesson I took from it all is to do what feels comfortable to you and at the speed in which it feels comfortable to you! and that , no matter how much everything and everyone around you seems to say it, sex is really not that crucial to the human experience! and this is important to say imo not only for ace people but in general because lots of people choose not to have sex/can't and their lives are definitely not over or worthless because of that! anyways I'm rambling now but yeah dkjdk I hope you can find something in this answer that helps you!!! I'm sending you lots of love 💞💞💞💞💞💞 and I know that questioning something that feels so fundamental to society and even sending asks like this takes courage so you should be proud of yourself!! congrats!! ily💘

#ask #anon #ace #long post #id put it under a read more but im on mobile !#alcohol mention

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