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#if I left for only week and wouldn't check the notifications I would be flooded with bots by the time I look at tumblr again
silver-horse · 1 year
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daily number of bot followers are increasing again 🙄
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unreliablesnake · 2 years
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Failing (Phillip Graves x reader)
Summary: You find spyware on your devices when you’re already depressed following another failed IVF cycle. Turns out Phillip is just worried…
Note: Fluff. A real emotional rollercoaster for the reader. / If you find any mistakes… they’re on me. Sorry. / If you want to know when I post new stuff, follow @unreliablesnakefics and hit the get notifications button. I don't have a taglist.
Warnings: afab!reader, mentions of possible infertility
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Being Phillip Graves' wife was a dream. That's what he would say, probably. In a way, it was true. He was a loving husband. He gave you everything you needed, showered you with gifts and romantic getaways whenever he had the time, flew in your family for the holidays every single time because he knew you missed them, and always noticed if something was off about you.
In reality he used his fucking techno-wizardry skills to spy on you. He had security cameras around the house, you already knew that, but after a while he let a few comments slip that made you suspicious he knew about your private conversations.
So one day when he was somewhere far away on a mission, you went to the Shadow Company HQ to visit an employee you had a good relationship with. You played dumb. You told him you just read some article about spywares and realized that maybe that's why some of your messages are shown as seen, even though you never opened them. And of course you knew that Phillip would never take a look at them.
The poor guy believed you, and he offered to check your devices for anything that could be worrying, especially on the device that belonged to the wife of the head of a private military company. And look at that, he found spyware on your phone and laptop as well.
“I'll delete them for you, okay?” he said with a smile. “Come back in–”
“It's okay, you don't have to,” you interrupted him with a sweet smile. “I know you're good at your job, but I wouldn't trust any of these after this anyway. I'll just throw them out and buy new ones.” He let out a weird laugh as he nodded. “Oh, and please, don't tell Phil about this. I don't want him to blame me for clicking on a wrong link or something.”
Nodding, he handed you back the laptop and the phone. “You can trust me.”
You thanked him and left the building as quickly as you could, heading straight to a store to buy another phone with a brand new number. You didn't want to ditch the old one. Oh, no. You just used this new one to create new accounts on social media and message some of your friends to divide your conversations from now on.
Sensitive topics could only be discussed on this new account and phone, while basic, everyday conversations with your friends, co-workers and family would be done on the old one.
Phillip noticed the sudden decline in the number of messages you exchanged on a daily basis. In the past your inbox was flooded with new notifications, but now it was surprisingly quiet. He wasn't home at the moment, and you always told him everything was okay with a sweet smile on your gorgeous lips whenever you talked.
He could feel that something was wrong. Based on the footage of the security cameras around the house, your behavior didn't change much, but it didn't prove anything. It could be high-functioning depression for all he knew, and that could be a sneaky thing. You barely communicated with others online or over the phone. This was a fact.
Another two weeks passed before he could finally go home to you. Everything seemed to be okay, but he knew what question to ask you, about a topic he had carefully avoided until then. “Was it negative again?” he asked you as he put his hand on your cheek, rubbing the skin with his thumb.
You gulped, let out a sigh, then curtly nodded. “I don't know how long I can do this, Phil. It's getting too much,” you told him, tears already forming in your eyes. It wasn't the first, second, or even third goddamn IVF cycle, and once again you failed. It was hard not to blame yourself, after all you were the one who just simply couldn't get pregnant.
“I know, sugar, it fucks up your hormones,” he whispered as he pulled you into his chest, having no idea how you truly felt.
But you weren't about to explain to him that you were blaming yourself. You didn't need him to feel sorry for you, or to act like he cared about becoming a father. He was only doing this because he knew you were lonely whenever he left for work, and he thought having a baby could help you with that.
The doctor at the clinic had suggested you see a therapist after the second failed cycle, believing there might be psychological reasons for the unsuccessful attempts, but you weren't ready, and your husband wasn't fond of the idea either. But recently something changed in you, and you just had your second session yesterday.
The therapist had said you should bring Phillip with you one time so you could try to get to the bottom of your issues. Was it you? Was it him? Or were the both of you defected? “I want to go to therapy. With you,” you clarified, just to be sure.
Your husband let out a tired sigh as he let go of you and buried his face into his palms. “Don’t do this. Don’t fucking do this,” he muttered. “I told you I don’t want therapy. Even I have to go through a psychological evaluation every year, and I’m fine.”
“I'm sure your fucking daddy issues have something to do with you not wanting a kid,” you noted bitterly.
Something obviously snapped in him because he gave you a death glare with those bright blue eyes of his. “I don't have daddy issues, and it’s not that I don’t want a child, I just don't want my kid to grow up without a father!” he told you angrily.
This took you by surprise. “Why would they grow up without you?”
“Come on, you know what I do for a living. I can die on a mission, it's in the cards for me.” Seeing the absolute horror on your face, Phillip took a deep breath, and walked over to pull you into a tight hug again, your face tucked into the nape of his neck. “I’m sorry, baby, but you knew that when you married me. But I’m not planning on dying anytime soon, I want to keep coming home to you.”
“You’d better,” you mumbled against his skin.
You could be so damn mad at him sometimes, but despite all this, you loved him deeply. And he loved you too, you knew that. He had been supportive ever since you started this baby project four years ago, always talking about how he couldn’t wait to see you with your baby. Until now you assumed he was just pretending, saying these nice things to make you feel better, but after today it was obvious he was just scared of the two of you being left alone.
What he said was true. You knew what he did was dangerous, but you didn’t want to think about it, so instead you just pushed this thought into the back of your mind. Phillip was good at his job, he would survive anything. He knew how to protect himself, and he had an entire team protecting him.
“I can guess who told you that bullshit about me not wanting to be a father,” he suddenly noted. “You should stop listening to her. And what’s with her usual ‘why don’t you divorce him’ question? It’s not normal.”
You suddenly froze in his arms. You had never told him about that, and you knew she was sneaky enough not to say it around Phillip either. Then you remembered –spyware. “How do you know about that?” you asked once you peeled him off of yourself.
He gave you a surprised look. “You mentioned it once.”
“I’m sure I didn’t.” He tried to laugh it off, but his expression turned serious once he realized you weren’t kidding. “I know about the fucking spy softwares on my devices,” you decided to inform him with your arms folded over your chest.
You could hear him mutter ‘fuck’ under his breath while he avoided your gaze, probably a thousand different excuses going through his handsome blond head at the time. “You’ve been acting weird lately, but whenever I asked what was wrong, you just brushed it off and said everything was okay,” he said eventually. “What the hell was I supposed to do?”
As much as you hated to admit it, he was right. You always said you were okay. But it wasn’t that easy. “Ask me when you’re here, not when you’re risking your life god-knows-where.”
“All right. Fine,” he said, putting his hands on your shoulders to make you look at him. “You’re here. I’m here. What’s wrong with you?”
“You know what’s wrong.” Phillip raised an eyebrow at this. He didn’t know, it was crystal clear, so you took a deep breath and said, “I’m tired of this. I’m tired of always failing everyone. All I want is a child, yet I just can’t get pregnant.”
“Baby, you can’t blame yourself for this,” your husband immediately told you as he placed a soft kiss on your forehead. “Look, if you think therapy might help, I’ll go with you, okay?” You nodded between sobs. “All right, get us an appointment. My assistant will clear my calendar for that time.”
The way he could make you feel–angry one second, then completely smitten the next–made you upset, but you couldn’t deny that you loved him. He was always there when you needed him, and apparently this time wasn’t any different.
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stansethandpaul · 3 years
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Jealousy Jealousy (rewrite)
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Angst -> Fluff: Embry Call x GN!reader
Summary: Embry gives y/n a slap in the face about reality after they constantly sulk about Bella.
A/N: I'm much more content with this one and I actually might end up deleting the other one, sorry about that. I actually took a lot more time editing this and didn't write this when I was burnt out compared to the other one! I'm just overall way happier with the other one because I knew that the other one wasn't my true capability.
warnings: angst (that's all I could really think of tell me if you see anything else!)
Masterlist
Ding!
Ding!
Ding!
Constant notifications vibrated Jacob's phone as we sat on his couch together watching the movie on the screen. I shot him a look of annoyance, signaling him to check his phone which he did swiftly. His eyes shot open in surprise before he shot up from the couch and throwing on a shirt and shoes, hopping out the door as he attempted to put the last shoe on.
"Sorry y/n! Bella just told me she was free, you know what it's been like for her!" He hastily shouted out before sprinting down the gravel driveway.
"Bye!" I shouted back, trying to hide my disappointment.
I grimaced at the situation. On one hand, I knew how the sudden disappearance of the Cullens devastated her, especially Edward's sudden abandonment but this happened way too many times. But on the other, Jacob was like her puppy dog now, it was like I wasn't even his friend anymore, it was like our friendship meant nothing.
Knowing that Jacob wouldn't be back anytime soon, I got my stuff and locked the door behind me before driving over to Emily's place to surround myself in the livelier company.
"Sup y/n! Missed me didn't ya!" Jared boomed as I opened the door to which I replied with a "you wish". I chuckled at his dramatic pain as he pretended to hold his heart, eyes shut and face contorting.
"Know where Embry is?" Questioning the dramatic boy as I peered around the room to see if I could find any trace of the lanky boy, no luck.
"Finding your loverboy huh? With the deepest of regrets, I must inform you that he was put on patrol today." He said, mocking my curiosity over Embry's whereabouts. I stuck my tongue out at him to tease him before flipping him off and leaving to the porch to await Embry.
"Knock it off Paul, it's not what you think"
"yeah sure, and if it wasn't what I HEARD THROUGH THE MINDLINK then I don't know what else it could have been"
Their voices permeated through the thick fog as their silhouettes came into view, Paul's muscly tall physique was seen locking an arm around Embry's tall lanky but lean body.
"Aw buzz off Paul," Embry said as he struggled to get Paul's arm off of his neck. He laughed at his struggle before letting go as he noticed me, shooting Embry a smirk to which a slight blush came onto his face, only noticeable as they got closer. Odd.
"Sup Paul," I smirked at him before turning my attention over to Embry.
"And hello to you too wolf boy," teasing him to which he shot a glare at me before attempting to stifle his laughs.
Paul said a prompt bye before jogging into the house to fill up his appetite whilst Embry sat down next to me, his body warmth radiating. The cold air nipped at my skin, pushing me to get closer to the much warmer boy as I swung my legs into his lap and resting my head on his shoulder.
"Jacob left again?"
A sigh left my mouth at his obvious question.
Closing my eyes promptly, I answered with a short nod. A response that showed my true feelings after all these times of being blown off by Jacob.
We sat in silence, my eyes closed as I felt his shoulders move up and down in a rhythmic motion, lulling me to sleep almost. The deafening quiet seemed to almost suffocate us before I decided to talk.
"I don't know what to do anymore Embry, I'm always there for him when he needs me but, he runs to her at the drop of a hat or more like a single text message," I grumbled, reminiscing about the times Jacob's left me in the dust for Bella, excuses sprouting up.
"Why does everyone in this town seem to be so infatuated with her," expecting no response I kept going.
"Is it because she's Charlie's daughter? Hell if I was his child Jacob would be all over me too right? I'd be the hot topic of town too, people staring at me wherever I go, being suddenly accepted by the Cullen family and Jacob. I'd really have the best of both worlds wouldn't I?" Scowling at my own questions, I turned to Embry for answers.
"Am I not right?"
Silence.
"Helloooooooo, Earth to Embry?" I said, poking his cheeks with my finger. His brows seemed to be furrowed together, eyes lost in thought, his attention elsewhere.
There seemed to be no response from him to which I huffed and turned back to stare at the fog rolling in.
Closing my eyes to embrace the serenity once more, his lulling voice startled me.
“I don’t think it’s true.”
I turned my head towards him, curiosity piqued by his response.
“Let’s be real Embry, I’d have the best time of my life if I was Bella fucking Swan. Every guy would love me, all the attention would be on me and I wouldn’t be a second option again. Hell, I’d even be able to actually confess to my crush without fearing rejection.” Bitterness laced the last sentence as I satirically spoke my mind. Looking at Embry’s hands and wishing they were embracing mine, the sudden gesture of his fist clenching as his knuckles turned white shocked me, he was mad.
“God y/n, why the hell do you always need to compare yourself to Bella? She hasn’t even done anything to you. It’s always Bella this Bella that if I was her blah blah blah. Get over yourself, you’re not her and you won’t ever be. Learn how to appreciate yourself and live YOUR life and stop moping around. So what Jacob runs to Bella each time, you have Jared, Emily, Paul, and everyone else.”
A long silence suspended in the air.
“You have me and you come running, you never see the other people around you cause you’re too busy complaining. You can’t even see how much I love you cause you’re so stuck up about being Bella and being Jacob’s priority aren’t you?” Finishing his sentence, he proceeded to get up before walking away. Stopping before reaching the woods, his back faced to me, he spoke simply.
“Find me when you can learn to be y/n and not Bella.”
His form morphed before running into the woods on all fours, leaving me stunned. After a brief moment, tears flooded my eyes. I never got to tell him that I do like him, I never got to tell him that I just want his attention, I just wanted him.
Thoughts spiraled in my head, I was jealous of Bella for sure but I was jealous because of the attention she was given. I just wanted Embry to treat me like she was treated, I wanted to be special to him.
I ran home, I ran because I was scared. I was scared I wouldn't be able to look at him properly.
Weeks passed as we ceased to talk, and I ceased to exist in the small town of Forks. Or so I thought.
I groaned as heavy knocks assaulted my front door, I picked up the phone looking at the time. Who the hell shows up at someone's house at 4am?
Throwing on a sweater and sweats, I dragged myself to the front door, the cold hardwood floor seemingly repelling me from ever making any progress. I swung the door open, grumbling as my eyes were half open wondering who it was.
Jacob Black.
Mentally sighing, I invited him inside from the pouring rain, he seemed devastated.
He sat down after he changed as I made him some hot chocolate to comfort him.
"She chose him y/n, he came back and she chose him over me. She drove to Italy for that stupid bloodsucker." His cracking voice was more than enough for me to grasp his frustration and devastation.
"I dropped everything for her, I did everything for her y/n. And she still chose the guy that skipped town huh?" Laughing bitterly at the situation, I stared at his cup before handing it to him.
"Maybe if I was better than Edward I would've won this stupid fucking battle," his words escaping his clenched teeth. He was like me, we were jealous of someone, someone that seemed to win everything, someone that we were not. The words spoken to me by Embry were words I carried with me even as I was moping over the whole situation.
"Stop comparing yourself to him, Jacob. You're not Edward and you won't ever be him. You're so insistent on being better than Edward or being Edward that you can't even see what's in front of you. I was always here for you Jake, I was always here but you treated me like I was a second option. You left me in a heartbeat for her but you never had time to spend with me, not even five minutes, when you were with her," I too chuckled bitterly at the ironic situation, me and Jacob were similar in many ways.
"Learn to live your life, don't live it for her or because of her, learn how to live it like you want." Those words seemed to resonate deep within both of us. After finally speaking those words, I realized that I was ready to live my life as y/n, a citizen of the small city of Forks, and not vying to be Bella, the new girl to forks.
I stood up, putting on shoes hastily before grabbing the handle. I could sense Jacob's attempt to stop me and apologize for his treatment but I knew better.
"It's ok, I know you're gonna apologize. I'm not going to accept, I want the Jake that will care and treat everyone with the same importance that you had for Bella. Come to me when you're ready, but until then I hope you grow and learn how to live your life."
I paused again, one foot out of the door.
"I have someone important to apologize to, someone that didn't leave me in the blink of an eye."
I hurriedly shut the door behind me before running to the woods, my lungs burning and legs aching as I forced myself to my limit. I ran and ran, visions of the houses slowly turned to trees, the crunching leaves under my feet reminded me of the days we would all run through the woods.
My breathing became labored as I was reaching my breaking point but it was close, our place was close. Then, in my distant vision, I could see it. That one pine tree, seemingly normal to many, but to me, it held our memories. The initials only reassured my assumption as I knew that he would be here waiting. As I got closer to the tree, my legs gave out under me, sending me tumbling to the ground whilst tree branches scratched my arms and ripped a hole in my pants.
"EMBRY! EMBRY I'M HERE PLEASE!" I shouted into the dark forest, eyes tearing up once more as I pleaded.
"I LOVE YOU EMBRY CALL AND I'M SORRY I WAS TOO BLIND TO REALIZE IT!" I shouted once more before crumpling closer to the ground, my tears now fully flowing and hitting the dead leaves below.
Maybe I took too long, maybe he moved on, maybe I was too jealous of someone to even realize his love.
As sobs continued throughout my body, the hope of him ever coming was diminishing.
I was too late.
Suddenly, I felt a pair of strong but warm arms wrap around my waist and pulling me up.
"Shhh, it's ok I'm here now."
That voice, I looked up to see Embry's face which held a dorky grin. I threw my arms around him as sobs still left my body, the emotional rollercoaster was far too much for me to handle.
"I-i'm s-s-so sorry Embry, I was too focused on trying to be Bella that I-"
"I know, I know, I heard it all," shushing me as he rubbed circles on my back consoling me. After what felt like hours in his embrace, I finally calmed down and only tear stains remained.
I finally lifted my head to meet his eyes properly this time, he stared back with tender eyes.
"You finally learned how to live for you huh?" He asked, not expecting an answer to which I was oblivious.
Before I could respond, he pressed his lips to mine. I didn't try and fight it and melted into it instead.
I was blind to be jealous of Bella when I already had something that she fought to keep.
Smiling mentally, I wrapped my arms around his neck to deepen the kiss.
Taglist: @krispypotato @therandomficwriter @crackheadenergy101 @cole22ann @uraveragegorewhore @xxx-wounded-angel-xxx @theonlyabby02 @lendeluxe @sassybadqueen @myflicker @junitorials13 @leahishotclearwater @pillowjj @mangobubblet3a @fuzzy-panda @beautiful-1nsanity @asprinkleoffaithandtrust @remembered-license @gutflorizt @sassybadqueen @britty443 @tsukkiswifeey @uraveragegorewhore @blackqueens01 @asprinkleoffaithandtrust @remembered-license @alwayshave-faith @nichia88-blog
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farfromsugafanfic · 3 years
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Sutures - Chapter Nine: Lost In Japan
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Genre: Soulmates AU, Idiots to Lovers, slight Enemies to Lovers
Pairing: Yoongi/Named Reader
Warnings (chapter specific): chest pain, health problems, getting lost
Synopsis: “A person often meets his destiny on the road he took to avoid it.” –Jean de la Fontaine
There was only one thing you and Min Yoongi had in common that night. You were both brokenhearted. You only intended to be together for one night, but when you both end up in the hospital the next day you discover that you are soulmates. It could kill you to be apart. As you and Yoongi attempt to sever the bond between you, will another be formed?
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When you landed in Japan, your phone was already blowing up with notifications. 
"Jang Sumi Seen With Min Yoongi's Bodyguard"
"Jang Sumi Joining BTS In Japan For Promotions"
The cameras already waited when you stepped into the airport. You were in the middle of the members, and instead of stopping for pictures like normal, bodyguards flanked in between the eight of you and the cameras. 
You felt as Yoongi reached down and softly took your hand. You looked back at him with a confused look and he just shrugged. 
"They all have their assumptions anyway," he said. "Just keep going. They'll try to get in our way, but just keep going. They won't bother you if you're with me."
You moved through the crowd with Yoongi's hand as your anchor. You heard the various fans gasping and screaming and the paparazzi asking questions and trying to provoke you and the members into a response, but before you knew it, you were in the back of a van and fastening your seatbelt. The satisfying click making you smile. You made it.
Yoongi was beside you. He still held your hand and you wondered if he noticed. His thumb rubbed lightly over your knuckles in a quick, sweeping motion. You didn't necessarily mind him holding your hand, it was just that there was no use for it now.
The van door shut as Jimin got in and plopped down beside you. A few seconds later, the van was moving.
"My phone blew up when we landed," you said. "Apparently, the bodyguard who helped me through the airport was your bodyguard?"
"Oh, yeah," he said, shrugging his shoulders. 
"What did you do then?" 
"Eh, we had plenty of bodyguards," he said. "Since we were in a group, it was unnecessary to have mine." 
"But, Yoongi, I know things have happened to you in airports before. You're an idol. You're a bigger risk." 
"Sumi, I lent him to you and something still happened," Yoongi said, his thumb brushing over your knuckles again, but slower this time.
"You really don't have to worry about us, Sumi," Jimin said. His eyes were closed and you'd honestly thought he was asleep. "We have enough bodyguards and we have Jungkook." Jimin kicked the back of the youngest's seat, who sat in front of him. 
You laughed and dropped the subject and instead gazed out the window at Tokyo. You'd only truly been to the city once when you were a kid, although you'd had many layovers in the Tokyo airport on your flight to and from the US. 
---  
"There's a problem with the hotel," Se-jin said, coming back out to the van. Most of the members were barely awake due to their busy schedules and how they'd gotten used to sleeping on most forms of transportation. "A fire sprinkler in Sumi's room burst and it flooded the whole room. The flooding is contained in her room due to the staff. Are you okay sharing a room, Sumi?"
You nodded. "Yeah," you said. "That's fine." 
"All right, does anyone--"
"I will!" All of the members shouted at once. You were amazed that despite their perceived states of sleep, they all appeared to be awake and fully listening. You laughed.
"She'll stay with me," Yoongi said. 
You turned to look at him surprised. "But, what about the rumors?"
"They know we're soulmates at this point. And, if you got caught staying with one of the other members, what do you think they would think?" 
Your brow furrowed. They already thought you had cheated on Minki with Yoongi, but if the media began circulating that you were cheating on Yoongi, you could only imagine the backlash you would receive. 
"Yeah, okay," you said. "I'll stay with Yoongi." Se-jin nodded and closed the van door as he went back into the hotel to finish checking in. 
"We've rented out the whole floor, so there should be no way anyone will find out," Yoongi said, giving you a small smile. 
"Then, why couldn't I stay with one of the other boys?" you asked, your lips curving into a smirk. 
Yoongi's ears turned red and he looked between you and the other members who watched in loving amusement.
"Just in case."
---
By the time you all got checked in and everything unloaded, the sun was beginning to set. You saw no point in unpacking your suitcase completely when you were only staying for four days. However, you unpacked your toiletries and headed to the bathroom. 
"Do you need to shower--?" you ask, but the words are left in the air as you notice Yoongi dropping the extra pillows and blankets from the closet onto the couch. "What are you doing?"
"Setting up my bed." He smoothed out the blankets and placed the pillow on one end of the couch. 
"You don't have to sleep on the couch. I trust you. It's not like we haven't shared a bed before."
"It's not that," Yoongi said. "I don't trust the urges. We've only had one, but I'm afraid if we lay together in bed. It would just trigger something." 
You nodded. "You're right. But, I'll sleep on the couch. This is your room." 
Yoongi shrugged and shook his head before falling back onto the couch and crossing his hands over his stomach. "Go take your shower." 
You sighed and went into the bathroom and took the shower you'd been long awaiting. Despite the coffee having been spilled on you hours before and changing into Yoongi's shirt, you could still feel the sticky cream-filled coffee on your skin. You undressed and folded Yoongi's shirt and placed it on the counter so that it wouldn't get wet and continued to undress. Only when you had finished did you realize that you'd forgotten to bring your pajamas with you. 
---
"Yoongi?" you asked, peeking your head out the bathroom. "Are you awake?"
Yoongi chose not to respond as you emerged from the bathroom in one of the hotel's white bathrobes. He didn't respond because he wanted you to strip in front of him, but rather, he was hoping to be asleep within a few minutes anyway.
As he heard you shuffle back towards the bed, he heard a small scuffle and you curse under your breath. He opened his eyes to see you standing by the bed as nothing happened. You unfastened the robe and allowed it to fall. 
Yoongi only caught a glance of your bare back before he shut his eyes again, although he felt a stirring in his stomach. He could only curse in his head as he attempted to focus on anything else. He didn't catch a glimpse of anything super sexual, but it didn't matter. Yoongi hoped this wouldn't lead to another urge. While he wanted nothing more than to pull you into him and kiss you up and down your body, he knew he couldn't for the sake of severing the soulmate bond. 
There were a few seconds of silence. He figured you'd finished getting dressed, but the light was still on and he hadn't heard you climb into the bed. He opened his eyes only to be met with a pillow to the face. 
"I knew you weren't asleep!" you said, holding the pillow above your head to bring back down upon him. Yoongi acted quickly and sat up and grabbed the pillow and tossed it to the side. 
You were dumbfounded for a second until you heard Yoongi laugh. "What was your plan exactly?"
You shrugged. "I don't know. I just wanted to prove you were being a creep." You wiggled your eyebrows as a smirk came over your face. 
"Hey! I didn't see anything. I kept my eyes closed."
"Mmm," you said. "I don't believe you." 
Before Yoongi could respond, a silence came over the two of you as you both simultaneously realized that you were straddling his lap and you could feel him pressing into you. 
"Sorry," he whispered as you climbed off of him. 
You shook your head. "No, it's okay. You didn't mean to. Let's, uh, let's go to bed."
"Wait, Sumi, what are your plans for tomorrow?"
"I just plan on going out and exploring a bit. I've never got to explore the city. Probably do some shopping, visit temples." Your eyes narrowed in curiosity. "Why?"
"I'll be working," he said. "Just make sure to get back here before me so we don't risk anything. I'm supposed to be done with the fan sign at five." 
You nodded. "You don't think being away from each other in general will cause anything?" 
It was only then that Yoongi realized that you hadn't been away from each other for nearly two weeks. While you might not be physically together, you were always within the same building or space. "I think it's been enough time." 
You nodded as you climbed under the covers of the bed and reached over to turn off the bedside lamp. Even in the dark, Yoongi could make out as you pulled the covers up to your chin and turned on your side. It made him smile. 
"Goodnight, Yoongi."
"Goodnight."
---
Your knees ached by midday, but your day alone in the city had been one of the best you'd had in years. You hadn't been truly alone for what felt like months. Sure, you slept alone and you could easily duck in the bathroom for five minutes of peace, but this was freedom you didn't think you'd have after the whole soulmate thing happened.
Yoongi was gone when you'd woke up that morning, the blanket tossed to one side of the couch. Not neat, but not exactly messy. It was odd, not feeling the aching in his chest when he was gone. You knew there were exceptions for when you were obligated to be apart, but since Yoongi worked so much, maybe it wouldn't be so horrible.
Your mind had still wandered to Yoongi throughout the day. Occasionally, you'd see a BTS ad campaign or someone wearing merch, but what really caught your attention was a small Kumamon figure. It was clearly meant to act as a paperweight or just to decorate a desk. You'd noticed that Yoongi seemed to like the character and after a quick Google search, it was confirmed. You bought the figure and tossed it into your purse.
With shopping bags in your hands and your camera in your hand, you managed to use your one free hand to pull out enough money to buy a taiyaki. You thanked the woman who handed it to you in your best rudimental Japanese. 
You were a few blocks away and halfway through your taiyaki when you thought to check the time. You nearly dropped the sweet bun when you realized it was 4:50 pm. Yoongi was due to be done in ten minutes and you were at least a half hour walk from the hotel--if not more. 
You rush out to the side of the road and attempt to hail a taxi. The first few passed you, but eventually one stopped and you frantically told the driver the name of the hotel. 
Within five minutes, the driver only managed to get a few blocks because of rush hour traffic. With nowhere to go, you were stranded. You'd gone the whole day without making a scene or being recognized (although maybe because you wore a baseball cap and mask), despite your face on the cover of magazine articles everywhere. And, you were afraid that you were going to have to end up on more of them to get out of this. 
You waited another five minutes before handing the driver a wad of cash that was definitely too much and apologizing as you got out of the cab. Carrying your bags and purse on your arm, you ran across the stopped lanes of traffic and tried to ignore the car horns and confused shouts. You checked the time. 5:01 pm. You ran and pulled up the GPS on your phone and entered the hotel address. 
Your vision blurred and you felt a small pull in your chest. It was warning you.
---
Something felt off as the van pulled up to the back door of the hotel. His palms begin to sweat and his heart beat against his chest as if he were sprinting. The door to the van opened and Yoongi didn't even remember it stopping or the rest of the members climbing out. 
"Yoongi?" one of the members called. 
Yoongi managed to his feet and out of the van but nearly collapsed against Jin, who grabbed him by the shoulder to stabilize him. He doesn't get far before he collapses against the wall of the hotel, his neck lulling back. 
"Yoongi, what's wrong?"
"Sumi...she must not be back yet..." 
Yoongi hears some talking and shuffling, but barely understands anything as two of the boys lift him up and inside the hotel. 
"They're going to look for her, Yoongi. It will be okay."
---
You'd made it a few more blocks, although you could barely tell. You were running, even though your vision was so blurred you could barely see. You used the buildings on the side as your guide and hoped you wouldn't bump into anyone. 
Your heart was beating out of your chest and you honestly couldn't tell if it was because of the running or that Yoongi was back at the hotel. You felt lightheaded and even with your headphones in you could barely hear the directions your GPS was telling you.
The edges of your vision begin going black and you feel your knees hit the pavement. This was it. You hoped a passerby would stop and at least call an ambulance. 
"Sumi!" someone a short distance away shouted.
You couldn't make out their faces, but you could see figures running through the crowd towards you. As you slumped against the nearest wall, you felt yourself being scooped up. 
"Sumi, Sumi, it's okay. We're not too far away. Come on, stay awake." 
You recognized Jungkook's face and allowed your face to fall against his T-shirt. It felt warm, but as you neared the hotel, your senses clearing a tiny bit, you realized it was a little too warm. You remembered back to the day before when you'd accidentally burned Tae's hand. 
"I-I'm sorry," you said. "It doesn't hurt does it?"
"It was just the T-shirt. Don't worry about it, Sumi."
His voice is soft and you can barely hear him over the commotion you're approaching. You can already hear the slew of photographers who are inside the lobby of the hotel and outside on the sidewalk. They haven't seemed to notice you yet, as their camera flashes and yells are aimed elsewhere.
"Jungkook! Jimin!" Se-jin called from the alleyway where he held open a service door normally only used for employees. While your vision had cleared, you still felt out of breath and your heart still convulsed in your chest. 
Jungkook ran towards the door and immediately into a service elevator. He didn't drop you back on your feet like you had expected him to. His arms were slung under your knees and around your shoulders. You wondered why you weren't burning his arms. Maybe because he wasn't touching your skin? Maybe the soulmate curse somehow recognized that he was helping you get closer to Yoongi? Whatever it was, you were thankful that beyond burning a small black hole in his T-shirt, you hadn't hurt him. 
The elevator dinged and Jungkook rushed you into your hotel room. Yoongi was already on the bed, a cloth on his forehead. He was sweaty, his shirt pulled up, exposing his stomach and his hair pushed back. 
Jungkook plopped you down on the bed beside Yoongi. Your breath evened out and your muscles relaxed, but the dull ache in your chest remained.
"Do you guys need anything?"
"Just some water." 
Jungkook went to the sink and filled a glass with water and set it on the bedside table beside you. "Just text or call one of us if you need anything." 
You nodded and Jungkook left the room. As soon as the door shut, Yoongi's arms around you and your face in his chest. His lips came to your forehead and you released a breath you hadn't realized you'd been holding.
"I lost track of time," you said. "I tried to take a taxi, but it was rush hour." 
"It's okay. It's not your fault. It was harder than we thought it would be." 
"Do you think we'll ever break it?" you asked. "If this was so difficult, if we can't even be apart due to a simple mistake, even if we were in love, how would we fix this?"
"I don't know. But, you should get some sleep."
"You too." 
You rested your head on Yoongi's shoulder, his arm slung around you comfortably, fitting perfectly against your waist and in the swell of your hips. It was the only place your body would allow you to be, but even if it was just the soulmate curse, even if you didn't love Yoongi, you knew there was no other place you wanted to be than his arms.
---
You fell asleep long before Yoongi did. Your small breaths tickling the skin on his neck and you were so still in his arms, only the way your chest moved slowly up and down indicated that you were still alive.
He'd never tell you, but he loved the way you looked when you slept. You scrunched your face up like a fussy baby and sometimes you'd make small moans in reactions to whatever happened in your dreams. 
It was nearly 1 am and Yoongi couldn't sleep. There were still pangs in his chest, but he wasn't sure if it was due to the earlier ordeal, or something else. He looked down at your sleeping form and carefully tucked stray hairs behind your ear. The ends of your hair were still a little damp with sweat, but he didn't care. 
You smiled at his touch and burrowed deeper into him. So deep, in fact, Yoongi wasn't sure you'd ever come out.
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