#ilyy:33 | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

legobatjoker · 2 years

Note

okay so like. im ryl rlysorry but its like 2:30 and i actually feel rly fevery like im roy woried abt it but i cnat take a covid test rn bc like i said its 2:30 but im genuinly rly scared tht i might have covid but idk i cant do anything abt if i do ig nd even tho its elarier than when i get to sleep i still rly shld head to sleep rn just bc like i said i feel sick nd also i need to get my sleep sechedual in order since were leaving so soon and also i just am rly not doing good rn tbh so im so so sorry that i havne answered your asks at all i just like. rly cant i just need to get to sleep im so sorry but i did read them and really so appreciate them so so much nd also im rly sorry tht this wil be short bc of that but belfore i do i do erly jsut wanna say that i love you so so much i really really do my dearest !!! like youre really such a wonderful kind caring sweet friend to me and are so thoughtful and considerate and understanding and rly just like are soso good to me and treat me sm kindness nd love nad make me feel soso loved and cared for and safe and im rly rly just soso glad and greatful for that and also jsut bring sm joy into my life whenever i sepdn tiem with you and i jsut rly hope that i can be the smae to you and that you know that im hgere for you and that i love you so so much my belovedi really really do and you really do mean so so much to me and yea ilusmm :''> i hope ur days been good and that you sleep well, ilusm <3 !!! 💞💞🌻💌🦋🐞💕🍊💗🍓💞✨✨✨

IM REALLY REALLY SORRY THAT YOURE FEELING ALL FEVERISH AND STUFF:((( thats already no fun at alll and then with the extra stress of travelling soon and not being able to test that makes it sm worse:(( i rlly rlly hope you can test soon and that its not covid but worst comes to worst then i hope your symptoms arent too too bad and i hope that whether u cant travel or still have to that either way there is some positive in either situation, even tho it is ofc rlly rlly sucky either way:((( but yeah i rlly hope u feel better soon no matter what love and if u dont then pls pls just do whatever you can to rest and dw abt anything else!!! also in general like dw abt sending or answering asks for any reason at all but esp with this pls pls dw at all i understand completely <33 and honestly i am j rlly glad u got to bed a bit earlier than usual!!!! i rlly hope youre resting sm right now and getting sm sleep and i am sososooo glad that you appreicated the asks i sent also :’332!!! and i am sosoooo glad i can be like a good friend to you and be considerate and stuff because that isso much what i try and want to do so so very much for you jules and just like i am sososooo glad to be your friend and also you are such an incredible friend to me always and do the exact same sm for me :’3333 you are sososoo beloved always both to me as a friend and just in general as a person peaches!!! youre so amazing and i love you sososooooosoo muchhh ilysmmm:’>> 💕💕💕💕🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻💕💕💕💕💕💕🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻💕💕💕

#mewtuals #castle.answers #ilyy:33

1 note · View note

yeonban · 24 days

Text

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TOBIAS!

@effigist asked: hi chris <3 when you have a second can u mayhaps spare some tobias bday hcs / rambling? liiike. what are his thoughts on this day? does he tell people? does it bring up any certain feelings? etc!!! 🎤

On it boss 🫡 ADGSAJDHSDAHJ TYSM FOR GIVING ME A REASON TO RAMBLE ABOUT HIM TODAY QUIN!!!

About the birthday itself:

As you'd expect, his parents never celebrated birthdays nor holidays, much less Tobias', so for the greater part of his early childhood he didn't know what a birthday is, why anyone would want to celebrate it, nor when his own birthday was. The first time Tobias learned about the concept and saw what the celebrations entailed was at Wammy's House, during one of the other orphans' birthday. Safe to say, he was extremely confused about why someone's day of birth mattered and why it'd matter so much that they'd receive a variety of things (gifts, cake, birthday wishes) for free because of it. It took him several months to grow used to the idea of telling others happy birthday (he was not a fan of it, and didn't gaf about whether they had a good one or not!) and even longer (YEARS) to wrap his head around why he should care about it at all. Thankfully though, as with many other so-called dubious social customs he's come across that his parents never taught him about, he's made sure to adapt to it, both when offering and when receiving birthday gifts/wishes.

Since Tobias didn't know when his birthday was and refused to tell anyone what his real name is or anything else about his identity outside of the fact that he's "legally dead" (which would've helped Watari find out more about him before deleting his identity from the government's archives), Wammy's House chose his first day at the orphanage as his birthday. Every orphan from his generation as well as every staff member knows/knew his birthday as that date.

The celebrations themselves weren't anything spectacular at Wammy's - a cake and a few gifts from the staff, but for the longest time Tobias wasn't comfortable with even that. Since he couldn't wrap his head around why someone being born was such an important event, he always felt on edge when his "birthday" came around (even though after the first few years he started masking it) because of what these free things would mean for him in the future; what he may have to give back in return since in his eyes nothing was ever free. He only became comfortable with his birthday celebrations when he was 14, on the year he found out why Watari saved him (+ the rest of the orphans). It now made sense - what Wammy's House wanted from him in return for all of their good will was for him to give his life for their cause. Knowing that, he started loosening up and eventually opted to continue the birthday 'custom' even after leaving the orphanage.

Watari did eventually find Tobias' previous identity after a long period of searching, and after deleting every trace of Thomas having ever existed, he secretly told Tobias (and only him) his actual date of birth. Tobias chose not to change the date of celebrations during his time at Wammy's though, and so for the majority of the other orphans, his real birthday is still unknown.

It's only after Watari died and Tobias left the orphanage that he decided to "tell" people his real birthday. The effect was exactly the one he wanted: doubt. Tobias has never been someone willing to give out relevant information about himself, so everyone who knew him figured he was trying to use a different birthday for each of the different identities he possesses. Likewise, people from the underground tried to find his roots by verifying documents from all over the world for people with his characteristics (at first to see if there were any family members they could take hostage/advantage of, and later to see if they could find his real name and give it to Kira so he could dispose of Tobias for them) but no results ever matched since nothing of his previous life exists anymore. This has led the underground to assume that it's a fake birthday as well, and Tobias enjoys the existence of this rumour: he even hoped to create it. He finds it hilarious that for once he's actually telling the truth and no one believes it because it's coming from his mouth, and he was also heavily amused when various mafias sacrificed their time and money in vain because of him. Plus, he thinks this is exactly as things should go: he will tell those he wholeheartedly trusts that it is his real birthday and celebrate it as such with them alone, while the oblivious others will never bat an eye when he receives a happy birthday on the day of because they think he's upholding a facade and that the people wishing him a happy birthday are none the wiser about the facade in question.

How he celebrates it:

When it comes to how Tobias celebrates his birthday, it's usually done via a morning til late afternoon party or other large-scale celebration that anyone and their family tree can attend, not unlike how nobles used to celebrate theirs in the old days (except far less oppressive, there's no need for stuck-up habits at his parties, and typically they aren't balls either; they're moreso bars-styled). Everyone present at these yearly parties is either an important ally of his or trying to get into Tobias' good graces, which is why he tends to receive heaps upon heaps of birthday gifts. It's also the most opportune moment for those who wish to ask for his help because by offering him a birthday gift, they can later declare that it's only fair he does something for them in return. Still, there are many influential people he invites to these parties even though he's not on good terms with them whatsoever, specifically because he enjoys observing their faces when they have to bring themselves to wish him well and offer him gifts when he knows just how badly they want him to die on the spot underneath the smiles.

After the party (so, during the evening and at night), he has time reserved for himself which resembles a regular birthday more than anything else that happens during the day. He does whatever he pleases (generally whatever he feels like doing at the time, typically not something he's planned ahead of time) and he tries to spend it with the people he actually likes and wants to be around. Whereas party Tobias has a hundred masks on and uses the celebrations to either strike deals or satisfy his sadistic tendencies, follow-up Tobias has very few masks in place and it's at times like these that his age actually shows. He might be hanging out with friends at a bar or in a shady alleyway, invite them to his home/go to theirs to eat a pizza and watch or play something together, or he might be running from the authorities because he chose to act like a rebellious youth on that night instead of using his reputation to get himself out of trouble as per usual. The people he tends to spend his after-party birthday with are Elijah (when he's not away on a mission) or various people he's taken a genuine liking to. These few people are the only ones who really get to see a piece or two of the carefree Tobias instead of the usual scheming Tobias.

How he feels about it:

As for how Tobias feels about his birthday... it's a bit complicated. He has no bad memories associated with it, but he also fails to comprehend why anyone would be genuinely happy he's alive simply because, which is why he tends to view it as a business opportunity to mingle with others moreso than a get-together with people he likes and who like him back. He understands why Wammy's celebrated it - he's a tool to them, so the longer he lives the better. He understands why the people he's helped or is allied with celebrate it - he's a savior or important partner to them, so the longer he lives the better. But what he doesn't understand is the people who care to celebrate it just because, without asking for anything in return (kind of like Elijah, who did benefit from Tobias' presence in his life but who also suffered plenty from it, and who despite that is still authentically happy to tell him happy birthday and pray for Tobias to live to celebrate his next birthday yearly).

Here intervenes a difference in how he reacts to the gifts he receives too. For those who ask something of him (or those he perceives as having an ulterior motive), he expects the fanciest gifts they can possibly afford, and depending on who it is he may even decide on a poor reaction to the gift (for example; intentionally but "playfully" degrading the 'low quality' of the gifts he's received from leaders who want him dead even though the gifts in question were something expensive/rare/etc in order to pour salt in their wounds and tarnish their reputation in front of prominent names). Meanwhile, if he likes the person he's spending time with, he'll even accept a rock as a gift. A random dirty rock they've picked up from the side of the street on the way to tell him a happy birthday. Hell, if he really likes them he might go out of his way to ask them to spend some time with him, entirely on his money. No gift necessary. If anything, let him gift them something in exchange for their time. Doesn't matter that it's HIS birthday and that HE should be the one on the receiving end.

Since he doesn't understand why people would celebrate his birthday beyond ulterior motives, he is surprised whenever they do. His first thought to a "happy birthday" is wondering what they're going to ask for next, and if they don't ask for anything he basically walks around with a question mark over his head. Especially if the person is someone he knows doesn't take advantage of others. In cases like these, which are EXTREMELY rare since his entourage mainly consists of people he has transactional relations with, it'd be relatively easy to tell he doesn't have a clue how to respond. He knows he needs to say thank you, and typically jokingly tells them he'll repay them for it because he knows that's what they're in for, but if that's obviously not the case he'll say thank you and then stare at either them or the gift in confusion because he was never taught how to properly react to that. Who even still has a heart in the underground. At least with Elijah he's grown used to it since he believes Elijah is a weirdo anyway, but with people besides him... good luck to both parties involved!

Also a bonus for how he reacts to others' birthdays since it kind of relates to the aforementioned points:

Similarly to everything written above, Tobias perceives most people's birthdays as a day to take advantage of in some shape or form, so he showers them in the best gifts they've ever seen in order to cultivate a better transactional relationship with them. At least, this is the case for 99.9% of his acquaintances.

If he actually likes the person though, the gift will (ironically enough) be less fancy. He'll allow them to use his credit card for anything they want during the entire 24h of their birthday, but the gifts he'll personally hand over to them won't be as dazzling as those he'd gift to someone he wants to remain on the good side of. That's because if he likes them, he wants to have a personal relationship with them rather than a practical/business one, and that can't happen if the foundation is shallow. That's why to the people he likes, he'll gift bouquets of flowers that remind him of them, gifts that are expensive/top tier quality but not necessarily fancy (i.e: if you told him once in passing 6 months earlier that you wanted x item but didn't have the money for it, even simply as an off-handed rant than as a hint for him to get it for you, then better believe he got it for you along with 10 other spares just in case) and also gifts that are more on the goofy side, the sort friends tend to buy each other to make fun of one another or to have inside jokes about. Obviously, the latter will never be the only gift they'll receive on their birthday, but rather it'd be a supplementary one for shits and giggles. Additionally, if he likes someone, they'll be able to tell because he'll actively try to make their birthday a good one. Whereas he'd only give the gift to those he wants as work partners and then call it a day, he'd stick around for the entire birthday when it comes to those he likes, and he'd make sure they get everything they desire on that day; whether it's material gifts or something else (i.e: a trip to y country, a day without worries from anyone, a meeting with a person they haven't seen in years etc - nothing is off-limits on their birthday and Tobias will make certain it all happens according to plan).

Frankly however... Tobias has never felt grateful someone in his life exists/is alive simply because. Not at this point in time at least. He has people he'd mind dying because they're relevant to his schemes, but none he'd mind dying only because it'd make his heart ache. For the grand majority of humankind, he wouldn't bat an eye if they died on that same day, so his birthday wishes to them are customary at best, which is why he believes it's always the same when it's the other way around too. Elijah comes closest to a person he'd mind dying for reasons other than personal plans, but even with Elijah... work is part of the reason why he'd mind it. He would miss Elijah's constant presence in his life, obviously, but he would also be bothered by the loss of a fantastic work partner. I could see the possibility of Tobias eventually growing fond enough of someone he doesn't perceive as a tool at all to finally understand why regular people wish their dear ones a happy birthday, but until then... 😬! For example Mello had SOME potential but well. they barely found the time to interact again after they left Wammy's House and before Mello was murdered, and besides... with Mello wanting to be the best detective in the would I'm sure Tobias would've eventually grown to think of him partly as someone he could get constant intel from, which again! work related. I also don't know if Tobias would ever want to grow fond of someone from Wammy's because he knows clear as day how unlikely it is for any of them to live past their 20s, so the unspoken requirements here are already bad enough, never mind the ACTUAL process! Good luck as always @ Tobias on the never-ending journey of understanding what normal people found out by age six.

#◜✧ . ❪ muse. tobias. ❫#◜✧ . ❪ tobias ; meta. ❫#You: Can you spare spare some Tobias bday hcs / rambling-#Me about to unleash The Flood on you: :)#ADHASDHASDSADSAJDHSDK NO BC THANK YOUUU FOR ASKING!!! Some of these I had in mind for Ages #but a few came to me as I was writing this post ^ so honestly. kudos to you for helping a guy out. ADHSAJDSDJ ilyy <33 #If you have other/more specific questions about bday stuff I forgot to mention on here tho lmk and I'll yap about them too!! XOXOXO

2 notes · View notes