#im going to kill you jeff bezos

[wurmeon]

I say stuff like "I'm going to kill you Jeff bezos" when I'm near my phone because in case they really are listening I want him to worry about that at least a little bit

[nycteres]

The bad thing about going outside is that you see the continued effects of capitalism. And whenever that happens i contemplate becoming a domestic terrorist

[laikahh]

explaining every song on my ngro playlist cause im bored as fuck yayyy . feel free to ignore the shit out of this post as it is Nothing

keep in mind this is supposed to be listened to in the order i put the songs in 👍 its like Chronological and shit. its their road to world cup...........

enter goddess by nigel godrich (from the scott pilgrim vs the world soundtrack) - i wanted to have an instrumental track on this playlist so that i could feel superior to others. i dont really have any like Deep Analysis of the song itself locked and loaded rn but the title reminds me of how both nagis and reos lives were literally Nothing before the other showed up. like yeah sure reo had like. being rich? and nagi had Video Game but. you know what i mean uve read the manga too. ALSO this is like such a nagi pov song to me... reo just thought nagi was a little freak that could be good at soccer maybe but i truly do believe nagi fell in love right then and there on those stairs <- no he didnt

harness your hopes - b-side by pavement - well this song to me is a whole lot of words so i dont have much to say. but like reo sure as hell kinda did harness his hopes on just one person. so yeah.

scott pilgrim by plumtree - so many scott pilgrim songs at the beginning of this playlist this is so embarrassing i have watched one movie. its a little bit nagi pov to me. i think hes down horrendous for jeff bezos jr.

you belong to no-one (but i belong to you) by dead slow hoot - well i know nobody is forcing me to write this post but like i dont want to explain this one . it fits!

there is a light that never goes out by the smiths - reminded me of nagis dont die before i do bullshit. i think he would be so down to die by reos side like he really would not mind getting hit by that double decker bus. also the lines about home (in the context of ngro. and just overall when listening to this song outside of my yaoi playlist) make me crazy?

by your side by beachwood sparks - their promise to stay together............ i will kill msyelf\

drain you by nirvana - im honestly not sure about the placement of this song. it definitely reminds me of them so i dont wanna delete it but. augh. but yeah theyre both so normal about each other & im sure staying together forever would do them wonders

lounge act by nirvana - every nirvana song on this brain turn off . anyway Bye Reo

i guess by mitski - the lets meet again beyond our dreams panels sound like this

i just threw out the love of my dreams by weezer - reo breakup blues . its a weezer song i dont wanna talk about it

why didnt you stop me by mitski - moreee reo breakup blues. this one doesnt exactly fit but im so used to it being here going straight from i just threw out the love of my dreams to the next one on this list would sent me into cardiac arrest

ill see you when were both not so emotional by american football - haha i put a midwest emo (dont talk to me about is american football midwest emo discourse) song on this playlist. do the nagireo (taylors version) playlist havers even know what midwest emo is? no the fuck they dont. i am better than them. anyway read the lyrics and Trust Me on this one okay? trust is very important in a relationship.

goodbye my danish sweetheart by mitski - listen either you are a teenage girl who had what reo thought happened to him happen to you irl at the same time you first got into this manga and you Get It or youre Not and you Dont. simple as that. support group for girls who are like reo mikage if reo mikage was worse and also not rich

drunk walk home by mitski - i really wish i could images in this post without fucking up my formatting. anyway google "episode nagi im not your toy reo panel"

running up that hill by kate bush (car seat headrest cover) - well i mean . they do not fucking Get one another. so. csh cover cause theyre sad teenage fa[i am dragged off stage] [I CAN RECLAIM BTW]

pantyhose by tv girl - i am thinking about nagis gloves. he got them from reo... did you guys know that...... and i mean they were divorced as fuck during the u20 game......... i am going to jump i am not kidding i Will do it

tommys party by peach pit - blue lock fandom heaven is nagi seishiro hell its a very efficient system. shibuya mustve been great for nagi . like hi reo has new friends now and hes hanging out w them and having fun. talking about stocks and shit (desperately checking his phone to see if nagi has texted him but its not like nagi knows this)

creatures in heaven by glass animals - i miss my wife choki. i miss her a lot

pork soda by glass animals - early manshine... before the basmun game... wahhh wah waahh

pink in the night by mitski - can i try again try again try again and again and again and again and again and again and again. i need you reo.

i want you by mitski - reo pov of this ^ whole event. kinda. it Kinda fits i rly ran out of manshine songs...

breed by nirvana - i see a lot of people say that kurt cobain described this song as being about marrying you high school sweetheart at 18 and having a baby and fucking hating it in an interview somewhere but i cannot find a solid source for that. even if he Did Not Fucking Say That i still like this interpretation of the song so its what im running with. basically um their current relationship is Not Good? so unless they improve (begging reo to give you some new heat does not count as improving nagi. telling nagi that you have a play also doesn not count as improving reo.) im trapping them in married at 18 jail. ill move this song to a different part of the playlist if they stop sucking sometime soon but for now its staying here.

✌

[howdyfriend]

Celeste LORE?? PREHAPS?? ANYA ?? A N DY ?? FUVKINB- EXPLODES

i am free from the road once more so i will answer ur ask now :)

Im going to talk about Anya and Celeste’s world itself first though so i can get into more character specific stuff.

Since they are super cool supervillains, they gotta have powers right? In this world, magic mostly genetic. There are alternative magics, think like potions and shit, but its weaker and more finicky. The most worthwhile magic is passed down from parent to child. It works like regular genetics, some powers are more dominant than others, generations can be skipped, etc. Anya got her powers from some distant aunt, and most of her close family does not have magic, save her cousin. Celeste’s family have had very strong, dominant magic, so she and her siblings all have their fathers magic. Magic is influenced by where and how your ancestors lived, Anya’s ancestors lived near water, so she has water magic. Celeste’s ancestors were the ones who would keep night watch, and as such has darkness and shadowy related powers. Not everyone has powers, and over time the number and diversity of people who can use magic has gone down.

Anyways Character Time Yay

Celeste grew up super rich. Like uber mega crazy rich. Not Jeff bezos kinda rich but really fucking rich. Eldest of four children, she grew up expected to bear the family name, business, and riches when her father dies. As such, a lot of pressure was put on to her. Everything was chosen for her. Every extracurricular, every class, even her outfits were planned ahead. She was allowed no individuality. She was the heir, designed to be a carbon copy of her father.

You could imagine how terrified she was when she realized she was trans.

She knew she couldn’t come out. While she didn’t like how she lived, it was better than the streets. So, for years, she sat on this revelation, growing more and more uncomfortable and angry at everything. She would reach out for support and be dismissed, restrictions for her behaviour were getting tighter, and the dysphoria was becoming overwhelming. That is until she saw the perfect chance to end all of this.

Her father had just wrote his will. One day, she went into his office to ask a question and saw it lying out on his desk. He had named her both sole heir and power of attorney to his estate, and knew that this was her chance to get out of all of this. Despite her increasing restrictions on her movement, she was able to secure enough cash from around the house to hire a hitman. No paper trail was left behind. Everyone in that house died that day, and she inherited huge money.

Anya grew up in a standard, suburban home. White picket fences, oak trees with tire swings, garages with suvs and minivans. Her childhood was ordinary at best. Despite a lack of expertise in the area, her parents managed her magic well and her abilities developed nicely. It wasn’t until middle school until things went wrong. She had been pestered by a small pack of bullies for a while, but had recently started escalating their behaviour. So she fought back. Small things at first, directing tap water back at their faces, causing clouds to pour rain down onto them, innocuous things like that. Over the course of middle school and high school she was starting to get fed up with the increasingly agressive attacks from her bullies, when it all came to a head on the night of her graduation when they tried to drop the stage lights onto her. She was a theatre kid though, and was able to get out of the way fast enough to not get crushed. In a fit of rage for ruining her moment in the spotlight (which they just tried to kill her with) she lost control over her powers, sucking every ounce of water out of their bodies. Feeling the adrenaline rush, she let herself go completely, savouring the power she felt. Eventually though, she stopped, and realizing the damage she caused, ran away.

She wasnt going to let up on that feeling of power though. Not a chance. After honing her newfound power on the local wildlife, she packed her bags and started life anew in a different country, becoming a hit man. One night she was approached by a young man seeking to inherit his fathers wealth. He knew he would be caught if he was the killer, so saught out her instead. He asked to frame it as a home invasion, as not only would he pay her in cash but in whatever valueables she wanted from his home. She took the deal, and got to work. After everything was said and done, they parted ways, Anya using her extra wealth to fund a far more lavish lifestyle. This lifestyle lead her to a house party, where she would meet an awfully familiar face.

Anyways they get together and decide “fuck it lets just cause problems on purpose” and become supervillains the end.

and for andy i have something planned for him ;) its fun dont worry :)

[wizardnuke]

why does amazon have the option to "rent" movies what the fuck am i renting you for im not getting a physical copy of mad max fury road on loan im just getting it on my puter. it's on everyone elses if they want it. but im not gonna pay 7.99 im doing 3.99. im going to kill jeff bezos

[theuniverseawakens347]

Let’s be serious.. memories from cashay..

1. You stalked my mom and granny and papa Houston in the industry.. W/ O PERMISSION TO WRITE OR SCREEN PLAY THEIR LIVEs .. extended to ALL CELEBRITIES IN MY FAMILY SO YOURS COULD “outPOWER” BLACK ENTERTAINMENT = TULSA WALL STREET BLACK PPL MY THOMAS TREE RETURNED JEFFERSON BY LINCOLN.. I have a dream … ME

2. Cut to me at 16 WHEN TOU REALIZE THE SPIDER BITE “medicine” you started giving me at 11 WORE OFF .. you REALLY REALIZED I READ MINDS + STARTED PLANNING KILLING ME AFTER SUCCESS* on ALEXIS. …

3. Cut to me living on my own finally in AVA.. YOU STALKED ME WHEN I CUT YOU OFF IN GEORGE FLORYD MONTHS BC YOU ARE RACIST. AND I PUT IT ON MY BLOG … and it alarmed you in THOSE MESSAGED RECITING MY TRUTHS , your thoughts AND HOWARDS NUMBED FEELINGS ABOUT LEE ..

4. Then YOU CONTINUED DEFORMATION OF MY CHARACTER W GIRLS YOU THEN PURPOSELY PLACED AROUND ME THRU 16- college + PRESTON TAYLOR A RAPIST YOU HIRED TO DATE ME AND PIMP ME AS A SUGAR BABE .. Sandra YOUR MONEY TREE FROM CLIVE .. fucking over HER HUSBAND LIFE JEFF BEZO WIFE .. “billionine wives club” - kris kardashian sentiments payroll to Epstein Maxwell relation ironically.

5. NOW IM GETTING HARASSED AND BULLIED AND THREATED THRU TELEGRAM AND GROUPME BUSINESS WORK EMAILS TO KILL ME FOR TELLING TRUTHS OF ORGANIZED “neighborhood watch” CRIMES AND PPLS TRUE FEELINGS ABOUT THEMSELVES AND ME MY FAMILY …

6. YOU STILL SENDING KIDS TO TRY AND ALARM AND TEST ME AFTER I SAY IM GOD = A HATE CRIME FELONY BC I DONT LOOK LIKE THE BIBLE VERSION IF JESUS NOR DESCRIPTION OF SIMPSON GAWDS. ..

OKAY LEE.. ALL RELIGOUS GODS GO BACK TO ONE.. ME. LITERAL• FUCKING• LEE.

BEST PART OF THE COMING OUT PARTY! SHOW YOU HAVW YOURE REAL NEPHLIM* NOT GOOD .. children ..

SISTER CLONE SAID FOR ME 2020 CHILOMBO TO WAKE AND REMIND ME MOST IMPORTANTLY.. my BEATS!

“Ready for a miracle, I'll

Chill until the sun sets

Waiting for the magic hour

It ain't perfect, but everything's beautiful here”

[mothzsblog]

Incorrect quotes to use (im updating when i get new ones)

- [ ] Stop sending me weird videos of babies heard

- [ ] Dont be clickin into your intestines prople

- [ ] Taylor swift won the super bowl

- [ ] You’ve been corrupted by your mother

- [ ] I need to be 14 to work I’m 8

- [ ] sheep fur

- [ ] Oh, you tricked me worm

- [ ] Jeff bezos did this to us

- [ ] Let me grab my other hairless testicle

- [ ] Trumpet the cowards trombone

- [ ] Like some genital pirate

- [ ] They’re basically sad little flesh turtles that tun hide and scream

- [ ] Go abed go before people sex/sext eachother

- [ ] Where did your right eyeball go?

It tends to disappear.

- [ ] Dont put it on my head go back to you

- [ ] Boonie the poo

- [ ] Shout shell

- [ ] Fine you hit me i take the child

- [ ] They’re holding me hostage, man

- [ ] My mommy paid for me

- [ ] My bottles. Im sorry im a recovering alcoholic that’s not really recovering

- [ ] I have a boyfriend

- [ ] He was like inside of you

nice.

- [ ] She is like 3 feet tall how did she get up there

- [ ] What in the assblaster is this

- [ ] *rolls on back* aaaagghhgghgggf

- [ ] Is this futhermucker anomalous how does he keep finding us

- [ ] I said scream not sqeaky fart you peeon

- [ ] That’s jerard he lives in all gotmer emo kids heads

- [ ] I for one like the eggs, they tasty

- [ ] He took the cheese

- [ ] *weird noise that may be a moan* balls

- [ ] *whiny voice* i dont want an empire

- [ ] Sophie you’ve committed tax fraud youre six years old

- [ ] The carrots are all gone _

- [ ] A bear if type 2 diabetes

- [ ] Dont eat your spouse

- [ ] Look i spent an hour to get here I don’t need your sass

- [ ] Oh you’re not wearing any underwear

- [ ] You get the hell out of here mort

- [ ] Come children follow me into the pit.

That’s not a terrifying invitation

- [ ] We gave her drugs

- [ ] *happily* I wish i was dead!

- [ ] How about you? I know how everybody’s gonna die

- [ ] How can she be so sick yet so strong. Like the economy

- [ ] Our weather’s weird, no it’s your crops kill them

- [ ] Tell that to my vagina

- [ ] Call me draco malfoy cause im slytherin

- [ ] Ow my boob

- [ ] Well ill just say it who knew that pig makes a really fun clutch purse

- [ ] Im a cactus😊

- [ ] Rudy touch it

no thank you

- [ ] From the ashes rise ramps more ramps

- [ ] Whispering* yeah they’ll get constipated

no

- [ ] How you like our educational system norway

- [ ] I can be waluigi

- [ ] Yeah sawdust makes it softer

- [ ] You in his DMs. I'm at home smoking weed. I dont even know who we're talking about

- [ ] Who knew a bug could speak all fancy like

- [ ] This bus only goes to one place and that place is vallhala

- [ ] And for _’s weave that got snatched

- [ ] _ got stuck in one, typical of _

- [ ] THATS AN EVIL ASS OTTER

- [ ] Ooh these cats are so real

- [ ] That’s the good thing about evil jesus

- [ ] You dont even need that evil ass mace

- [ ] Are you penacilin

- [ ] Ill give you a dramamine you won’t even know

- [ ] Mercury is in the microwave or something

- [ ] You bitch, you look like a backstreet boy

- [ ] You bout to be tweedle-slapped

- [ ] I need viagra of the fingers

- [ ] Did you just trigger tag my grandma

- [ ] It’s game of thrones with otters

- [ ] Your toothpick friend is stupid _

- [ ] There hasn’t been a rat that high since the og Chuck e cheese

- [ ] Not me drugging the coffin

- [ ] I got an ostrich

- [ ] Damn crack baby

- [ ] He dropped his balls

- [ ] Even the walls are bones

- [ ] Well, your mother sucks eggs

- [ ] Listen to your heart what is it telling you.

i should quit.

- [ ] The curb is not my friend

- [ ] I don’t have a fist or fingers

- [ ] 50 shades of evil jesus

- [ ] He lets his ass rest

- [ ] _ YOU MADE IT HERE

- [ ] He’s like a double orphan’ orphan squared

- [ ] (Still very alive) Dont disrespect my grave like that

- [ ] I felt a kick in my appendix

- [ ] IM SUFFERING!

- [ ] _ back off do you hear my piano it’s mad

- [ ] EVAPORATE TALL PERSON

- [ ] What do you mean “we” mammal

- [ ] Would you kindly shut your noise hole

- [ ] Cheer up meatbag

- [ ] Look pal you only have one set of clothes and you’re not taking them off while im here

- [ ] *whispers* the holy bone?’*nods*

- [ ] I can be a mob boss of animals

- [ ] Are you the british

- [ ] Im very excited by my uterus bat

- [ ] _ dont be frenchphobic

- [ ] Oi _ get your mouth away from that french girl

- [ ] A mob of unruly clowns

- [ ] Go go hippie rangers

- [ ] Its like demented dog food

- [ ] Lesbian of death

- [ ] She she looks like a lobster

- [ ] Clever little box

- [ ] Who ya mama and daddy- THE GAYS

- [ ] Curse you mafia james

- [ ] I don’t want a puffer sonic i want a simp

- [ ] Im gonna keep feeding instagram

- [ ] He’s just gotta go poopoo leave him alone

- [ ] She got hit by a giant cake

- [ ] Im looking at you demon blueberry

- [ ] NO GANGBANGING IN THE POND

- [ ] SATAN IS NOT A FUCKING POGO STICK

- [ ] Not the dead catcall

- [ ] This is what i get for wearing half a shirt

- [ ] I saw the whisker things part like moses red whatever

- [ ] Is it a penis?

No

- [ ] Jesus fuck put it back in its not done yet

- [ ] This is what i am mama, this is my final form

- [ ] SHES A JESUST

- [ ] Dont worry its not mold its just my chocolate going through photosynthesis

(Knocks on door) Where’s boyfriend

Is that the marriage demon?

[red-velvet-0w0]

Im tired of people writing love songs. It feels like the only type of songs that get written are either "Im in love with you" or "I want to kill the government, my boss, and Jeff Bezos".

I had to look up revenge songs for a school project, and it took a full hour as 99% of the thing I found were love songs (I dont even know how? it was all about getting revenge on exes), then there were three on taking revenge on the government.

SONGS ARE A FORM OF STORYTELLING!!!! They can be about literaly anything. BE CREATIVE WITH IT. write a song about a guy who decides to summon an evil wizard from another dimention to kill a guy who cut him off on the highway. write a song about a guy on his deathbed who decides he wants to go for one last walk.

At least with books, while the romance genre is just as repetitive, romance books are generaly considered not as "high class literature" as other genres, and can generaly be avoided. YET FOR SOME REASON every time I turn on a radio or listen to any music I haven't preselected, IT IS ALWAYS ABOUT FUCKING ROMANCE.

[life-gave-me-oranges]

i mean, being born and living on this beautiful earth is quite a pleasing experience. but the way life has become makes me go. ew. :/

[diondecarnate]

not to sound like a white lady but im currently incandescently angry about how amazon handled the books they just sent me

also if anyone has any online bookstores that are not amazon and that know how to package a book properly lmk, i dont really want to buy everything from barnes & noble but i will cause at least they can afford 2 seconds to put some bubble wrap in the box

[deadtower]

alexa why do i always get so embarrassed about things that i shouldnt be NEARLY as embarrassed as i am about. like why do the smallest things have me anxious for hours if not days or weeks. someone does a tiny thing that means like literally nothing and we’re not even friends and im just sitting here overthinking for like AGES

[whyareyouhere66]

Haikyuu Characters as Quotes From My Life

S O

Basically, this chapter is just some of the Haikyuu characters as quotes that me, my friends, and even some of my classmates have said. Yeah, it's simple as that. They don't really make sense *the quotes*, even with context so yeah lol.

----

-*-* "Christian Grey may be 50 shades of fucked up- but I'm 50 shades of 'I'm gonna whoop your ass" -Kuroo

-*- *"I think I have a crush on Pennywise." -Tanaka

-*-* "If only men had brains and balls, at the same time." -Kiyoko

-*-* "No Im not gonna eat my cat, I'm not a cannibal." -Nishinoya

-*-* " I look like a warthog and have the personality of a she-devil." -Yamamoto

-*-* "See, I told you Megan, my boobs are getting bigger." -Asahi

-*-* "Do you have gum in your pocket or are you just excited to see me?....I think you're excited to see me." -Oikawa *to Iwaizumi, most likely*

-*-* "Tell me a good song- and we're not listening to the trolls soundtrack." -Ushijima *talking to Tendou*

-*-* "If I write my essay about Fortnite and global warming what will I get?" -Bokuto

-*-* "I once had a guy walk up to me at target and he was like 'wanna buy some ball wash?'" -Terushima

-*-* "Ryan Reynolds is hot." -Ennoshita

-*-* "Jeff Bezos would be a great drug dealer." -Kenma

-*-* "Ugh that's nasty....gonna give us fricking herpes..." -Akaashi

-*-* "HE HAD TWO GLIZZIES" -Bokuto

-*-* "It looks like pennywise could crawl out of that things butthole." -Hinata

-*-* "I just got winky faced by Kahoot." -Tsukishima

-*-* "I'm gonna get fax paper, and make cards that say "we give free bj's" and tape it on peoples doors." -Kuroo

-*-* "If I have to listen to another minute of JoJo Siwa I will lose my mind." -Daichi

-*-* "YOU CLOSED MY DUOLINGO TAB?!" -Nishinoya

-*-* "Can any orgasms so photosynthesis...?" -Kageyama

-*-* "My shoulder is no longer a virgin." -Yamaguchi

-*-* "Don't change, we hate you just the way you are." -Iwaizumi

-*-* "Mom can you leave so I can curse at my friends?" -Sugawara *talking to Ukai*

-*-* "We thought there was cum in the bathroom." -Tanaka

-*-* "I don't like purple, I like ducks" -Hinata

-*-* "The bible is not smut, bitch." -Kenma (I'm sorry if anyone finds this offensive-)

-*-* "Mort I cannot 'move it move it' anymore" -Yamomoto

-*-* "They kill pears- that's why it's so sad. But pineapples stay alive, pears just- die!!" -Bokuto

-*-* "Not gonna lie man but your toes are...dry." -Tanaka

-*-* "That's like going up to a police officer holding up a bag and going, "hey can you step outside for a minute, go down and get some coffee, I should be done in about 15 minutes?" -Kindaichi

-*-* "I swear to god I will turn this- this navy blue van around!!" -Daichi/Ukai

-*-* "Nah he's got little-man-itis." Tsukishima *talking about Hinata, ofc*

-*-* "Don't we have a leader in the real world?" *Bokuto, continue to next quote *

-*-* "Yeah we've got Michael Jackson." -Kuroo *that one was a 2-parter haha*

-*-* "YOU'LL BELIEVE GOD IS A WOMENNNN- is that vodka??" -Nishinoya

-*-* "It's probably like, burnt fire or something." -Oikawa

-*-* "Why do you not like shirtless men." -Tanaka

-*-* "I'm gonna start a petition to make Boston a continent....or maybe New Jersey." -Hinata

-*-* "We've known eachother since the 1800's- we went to Travis Scott concerts with George Washington." -Tanaka *talking abt Yamamoto*

-*-* "Dame cabeza" -Tanaka

-*-* "No one likes Jacobs, Jacobs are ugly and raspy." -Tsukishima

:D

K great, so anyways-

Idk that's all I got rn, y'all got a free glimpse of my strange friends and even stranger school. Hope you enjoyed and adios

edit: holy shit this blew up a lot faster than I expected- thanks so much y’all

[rinzis]

what your favourite genshin impact character says about you: no holding back edition

i’m finally allowed to post again!!! great joy

aether/lumine: you’re basic as hell sorry . also stop fighting over who the better twin is they’re literally the same person but different genders. you’re pretty fun to be around ig but i feel like you eat food off the floor. 5 second rule not 5 hour rule ok

amber: ok i’ve actually met a bunch of people whose fav is amber and you guys are actually really sweet but pls learn when to stfu you’re so loud . also you guys go feral whenever someone (everyone else in the fandom) says amber sucks like chill bae

kaeya: jesus fucking christ your horny is off the scale. every kaeya stan i’ve ever met cant keep it in their pants. and we know the only reason you like him is bc of his giga bouncer supreme ultra man rack 3000. stop saying you want him to smother you with his tits. get some help.

lisa: YOU GUYS ARE COOL AS HELL!!!!!! as someone who relates to lisa you’re very cool. most chill people to be around and you’re definitely super smart. not lazy but just reserved. 11/10. oh btw do you use her for climbing?

diluc: do you have daddy issues? you guys definitely have a thing for the tsundere archetype and you probably like zhongli too. just admit you want diluc to do the kabedon thing on you and move on. we know what you’re like. also how does it feel being so short? i swear every diluc stan is small as hell

jean: YOU GUYS are so sweet pls whenever i play co op with a jean main it’s just like wow you’re so strong and nice and thanks for healing my entire team wow........ however although you’re so responsible you probably enjoy cancelling people on twitter for fun . sorry

venti: VENTI STANS. I LOVE YOU. is it partially because i myself am a huge venti stan? yeah no. you probably missed out on his first banner and are saving for his rerun..... same......... anyways you guys give off the best vibes n it’s always so fun to be with you. i love you all

razor: i have one question for you guys . did you either like warrior cats or were you a wolf kid?

albedo: you guys are so smart wtf !!!!!!!!! you’re so rational in co op mode too and if you have albedo you probably use him as a sub dps for your teammates bc you’re so good at reading situations........ then again you also have some weird shit going on like cmon it’s milk after cereal you psychopaths

sucrose: you either kin sucrose or are creepy sorry . ok but she’s so underrated like her passive 3........ WOAH.............. you definitely use her in spiral abyss,,, also are you a burnout successful kid who used to kiss teachers’ asses and middle school was a breeze before getting to college/university and realising that professors don’t give a shit anymore? wow who would have guessed

diona: wannabe catgirls assemble! please move on from your warrior cats phase you’re almost as bad as the razor stans but you’re adorable too. you probably want qiqi or klee but don’t have them so you’re settling for diona

barbara: thanks for healing my team in co op barbara stans !!!! you guys are genuinely so nice omg thank you for being so reliable all the time,,, do you highlight your notes so it’s more art than notes? yeah that’s what i thought

mona: ok if no one else is gonna say it i will,,, no one understands shit about your astrology thing going on. i’m a caprisun? great

bennett: YOURE ALL ADORABLE. thanks for helping us out in co op!!!! you definitely advocate for bennett rights and yes pls do,,,, we all love benny deep down!!!! you either don’t have him or have him at like C218372

fischl: jojo stans

just kidding but you all probably act like fischl irl. also did you have an emo phase

klee: ok if your favourite is klee you definitely don’t have her . waiting patiently for klee’s rerun!!!! shes just so adorable and so are you guys,,,,, so fun to be around !!!!! you probably have diluc and hate him

noelle: you guys....... the rarest of the rare. you love trying to convince people that she’s a great healer dps n everything else...... no bae you probably use her because you like geo and claymores like hmm yes i will now hit things hard with my big sword and rock power

ok onto liyue now sweats nervously

childe: you guys are ALL simps. ALL OF YOU. go n touch some grass bro!!!!! you either think he’s super sexy or you bully him and make the ed sheeran jokes (not funny) . you follow griffin burns on tiktok too dont you

zhongli: you either love him for his gentle demeanour or you want him for his fat giga dumptruck 3000. make up your minds!!!!! you guys are so clueless in co op mode but you’re hilarious. you probably have his energy recharge at like 200% so you can use his ult and hear I WILL HAVE ORDER every 4 seconds

xiao: STOP GROWLING AT PEOPLE. every xiao main is so aggressive not joking . yeah the only reason you saved for him is because you want to stare at him all day n listen to him growling . you guys genuinely scare me . no he would not hold ur hand and do cute things with you,,,,,, if given half the chance he’d probably decapitate you

ningguang: alright jeff bezos, hand over the cash. yeah so you’re either rolling in it or want to be her sugar baby. but you guys have such an intimidating aura like playing with ning mains is just .... you always build her so well she’s an absolute tank!!!!!! thanks for scaring the shit out of me but also protecting me

beidou: YOU GUYS. you’re fun to be around but i also feel like you could probably destroy me in 3 seconds flat !!!!!!!! do you hate diluc too? i love playing with you guys because all i hear is TO ASHES every 2 seconds and she’s just cool as hell so yeah i really like beidou stans. i feel like you all have her so congrats

qiqi: you’re so cute,,,,, best healer !!!! you probably love playing qiqi because her skills look so cool and you prefer playing heal/support,, if you don’t have her you just love her bc she’s so tiny . spoiler alert but do you have a thing against xiao for killing her lol

xiangling: you’re so chaotic help,, you definitely pair her with xinyan too because you give off the most uncontrollable vibes,,,,,,, did you level her to use her in the spiral abyss or do you just think polearms are neat and don’t have xiao or zhongli

xinyan: please reread xiangling paragraph but replace polearm with claymore . you like either bring me the horizon or bubblegum pop there’s no in between

chongyun: you’re all the nicest people ever and you’re so chill . you love chongyun with your whole hearts and i adore you !!!!!! the animation of him eating the popsicle melts your hearts (no pun intended) and you just think he’s really cool :( ily all

xingqiu: chongyun vibes but make it kinda unnerved . burnout successful kids 2.0 ,,,,, are you clever too? you also love xingqiu and believe he’s worthy of being a 5 star with his heal and damage reduce !!!!! he’s so helpful wtf and so are you . please stop going on about his legs though it’s highkey weird asf

keqing: COOL PERSON SYNDROME! i main this gal so i love you all . do you get as mad as i do when people say she doesn’t deserve to be a 5 star? yeah . are you a procrastinator and try and take lessons from keqing but are just so lazy? do you use her teleport because you can’t be bothered to climb mountains? yeah that’s what i thought

ganyu: you’re all the nicest people alive and i adore you all . thanks for being so kind in co op mode . every ganyu main i’ve met is so sweet and you’re all so powerful too woah....... you hate the cocogoat jokes too >:( pls mihoyo give her more attention !!!!!

scaramouche: you have rights guys we know you exist. also we know you want him to be playable. we know that you think his hat is neat. we know you love this shawty but please be quiet.

signora: wait you guys exist

hu tao: you prank people for fun like pls stop im so on edge when youre around . plus i feel you laugh at videos of babies falling over n shit,,,,,,, you cant wait for her banner but also please shut the fuck up

dainsleif: please leave me the fuck alone we did 1 (one) quest with him and you’re all obsessed with him . ok second hand dmitri from fire emblem you want a medal for being a fucking simp?

[polandspringz]

gen:lock s2 ep 6 Liveblog

So, I had not been spoiled for this episode, I was scared though bc all the discussions in the spoilers channel of the server were blacked out so I was WORRIED. Warning how nonsensical my live blog is

(Starting off) I don't trust this chase

Okay already the tone of this episode is much much better

THE DELIVERY ON THAT NO

This feels like we ARE going down the path of "kill the whole team, replace them with copies"

DID THEY REALLY JUST DO THE FUCKING "LET ME IN LET ME IN LET ME INNNNNNNNNNNN"

(Side bar) Also I love that whenever I watch gL HBO likes to not put it in HD so i always suffer

bc Holcroft was first a transparent hologram im always surprised by how PALE he really is- baby got those baja blast eyes

I wonder if the HBO team are trying to get through the war plot to just focus on tech

UnLock. Well at least its not another fucking "mind-" concept I need to keep straight when writing.

I do like more Miranda focus this season-

DRI

I kind of hope we find out she's gL compatible (in retrospect, after seeing what they do to Sinclair, let’s HOPE they don’t do this)

Yaz and Val are KINGS- god Val looks so GOOD

THEY DID NOT GIVE MIGAS THE FAKE BEARD

"Are you in shape for the mission?" "Sorry no I've got a sleep paralysis demon"

WE SMUGGLING IN A BOMB?????? THEY ARE GOING TO KILL EVERYONE THIS SEASON

Time to gaslight gatekeep girlboss i know this isnt gaslighting but for the joke we are using Dri without her knowing the whole context~

Sinclair GET IN THE HOLON COME ON LETS DO IT

Henry what happened to you-

this slowly descending elevator is JUST the ironwood vault scene

INCLUDING THE SLOW HEAD TURN IM DYING THIS IS JUST RWBY V7 FINALE/V8

WHAT???? WHAT WAS THAT I DONT WANT TO REWIND TO GO BACK (this was in ref to the looming giant Holon)

can they get a better caliban voice

I DONT CARE I LOVE WELLER

I was wondering so hard about if we were going to get anymore Weller content after ep 1. WELLER AND CALIBAN FATHER SON INTERACTIONS

"for the sake of humanity, your body cannot be your own" feels like a THEME OF SORTS HMMMM...

really surprised we haven't checked in on Cammie i guess she's 100% dead then huh

So we are building a new nemesis very cool

ODIN isnt that norse

wOW nyc looks GREAT

I hate this Koala so much why is it so fucking UGLY- its name is mr. cook????

It's totally the true villain

"The HereAfter"- Jha you've joined a CULT

Oh so she just wants to stick it to Holcroft

This is some obvious Elon Musk/Jeff Bezos commentary which is not bad but I hate when shows decide to be obvious about it and don't go some way that famous books have done it with more metaphorical, impactful routes. Like either go ALL THE WAY or don't. Don't half ass this.

I have 5 minutes left I'm still like ARE WE JUST KEEPING CAMMIE DEAD

THAT WAS HORRIFYING WHAT THEYRE DOING TO SINCLAIR HOLY FUCK

Migas that is the SHITTIEST DISGUISE EVER

Oh god is Migas going to die too

wow are we going to get a fight scene finally

MIGAS IS DEAD ISNT HE FUCK

***THATS NOT CHASE***

"YEAH YEAH FOLLOW ME" IM WHEEZING

been a while since we've seen the striders or whatever they're called

chase REALLY FUCKED THIS UP FAST huh

oh are we going to parallel s1's finale of miranda jumping out of the strider with Dri jumping out of miranda's this time

VAL DONT DIE PLEASE

THAT WAS THE SHITTIEST FUCKING JUMP/BLASTED AWAY ANIMATION IVE SEEN IM DYING

oh great wait until Chase finds out who ELSE is inside that strider

YAZ?????? WHAT THE FUCK

OH THEY GOT HER OUT IN TIME THANK FUCK

"correction- WAS"

ABLE really delivering these lines im laughing so hard

worried Dri and Miranda are going to die in the bomb too and everything will go to SHIT

wow i would've thought chase would've had a bigger reaction

MIRANDA DEFECT WITH US!!!! COME ON!!!

THE FLOW IS HERE AND I DONT THINK MIRANDA'S CRACKED SHIELD HAS PROTECTION

CAMMIE!!!!!!!!!!

SHE'S BECOME FULL FURRY

ME TOO MIRANDA!!!

"WHAT THE FUCK!"

[normal-thoughts-official]

Why was Lorenzo such a jealous bitch nd why does this fandom treat him like he's a good person😑

okay so i know that this is a rethorical question but i've actually thought about this a lot so i'll take my crack at answering this - WHY is lorenzo such a jealous bitch?

the only thing he's said about why he hates magnus - that i remember of, at least - is the line "he was born with a silver spoon in his mouth. his fame is not based on talent, it's all nepotism"

now, anyone who knows anything at all about magnus knows that not a single fucking word of this is true. magnus was born poor in a recently colonized country under a lot of oppression, there was no damn silver spoon in his mouth, and after that he was thoroughly abused by his demon father. his fame is also absolutely based on talent - he invented portals, for fuck's sake! and the "nepotism" comment barely makes sense. i assume he means it's just that magnus' power is all due to the fact that his father is demon royalty, which makes magnus more powerful than most warlocks

so, that explains what lorenzo is jealous of - magnus' power and prestige among warlocks (such as having been HWoB for decades) - but not what the fuck lorenzo's deal is (i mean, we've met plenty of other warlocks in the show, many of which weren't really fans of magnus, but no one other than lorenzo has this idea that magnus doesn't deserve his fame), or why magnus (because while like, yes, magnus is very powerful, i assume he's not the only son of a prince of hell, considering asmodeus is not the only prince of hell and these guys get on the loose, like, weekly. and lorenzo is obviously OBSESSED with him, he deliberately went out of his way and abused his power as HWoB several times specifically to antagonize him, and also, you know, TRIED TO KILL HIM)

lorenzo talks about magnus almost as if magnus took something from him. it's not just that magnus is powerful and that he supposedly doesn't deserve it, lorenzo obviously feels as if antagonizing magnus is some sort of vengeance. i know plenty of jealous people, but going as far as forbidding anyone other than himself from giving magnus a magic transfusion, specifically saying that if it went wrong he wouldn't help, and then refusing to take back the magic when he KNEW perfectly well that would kill him, is to me very obviously a thought out plan TO kill magnus. lorenzo had been hoping from the start that magnus' body would reject his magic and the transfusion would kill him - why else would he specifically say, the second he agreed to the transfusion, that if it went wrong magnus would be on his own?

and it's not like lorenzo even gains anything from that, other than killing magnus. and humiliating him, which lorenzo has said explicitly was something he wanted to do (i believe the term he used was "breaking his spirit", but potato potatoh). if it was about magnus' position of power, he already had that - lorenzo literally already had the HWoB position. if it was about magnus' magic, he had already lost it. lorenzo had absolutely NOTHING to gain from magnus, so his personal vendetta against him doesn't even make sense from JUST a jealousy standpoint. he had already "won" over magnus. the only explanation is that he wanted some kind of revenge

but revenge from what? well, we know that magnus and lorenzo don't like each other, but magnus never really TOOK anything from lorenzo. considering how he wouldn't miss an opportunity to talk about how much he hated him, i think lorenzo would have brought it up if that had been the case. and magnus is just not the kind of person to pull the rug from under other people's feet - look no further than the whole show for evidence of that. he literally puts the others above himself at all times (which is unhealthy but that's another story and something i've talked about plenty of times already)

so why does lorenzo feel so much resentment towards magnus? why does he act as if magnus' power took something that was rightfully his?

i think lorenzo feels that he was entitled to be the most powerful, to have the most prestige, to be above magnus, and he resented magnus because that was simply not true

why?

let's go back to the only thing we know about lorenzo's backstory - the baby painting. yes, it's a huge meme, but think about that for a second. lorenzo has a huge ass painting of himself as a baby that he displays proudly in his home and that's, like, his #1 stop at the house tour. the baby painting. "needless to say, being born in spain during the siglo de oro was quite the experience". is the first thing he said

let's make this abundantly clear: this line makes it canon that lorenzo is a colonizer. the siglo de oro ("golden century" in spanish) started (roughly) in 1492, year of the """""discovery""""" of the americas, and ended (roughly) in 1659, the year when spain signed a treaty and lost a bunch of their territories to france (link to source). altho the term is usually used to refer to the boom of the arts in spain, it's obvious, just from these historical landmarks, that the siglo de oro is about colonization. it's about the fact that at the time spain was at its peak colonial power, and could afford to exploit what later became third world countries, and put part of that money (in fact, the literal gold they were stealing from latin american countries) into arts and other luxuries (because in the renaissance portraits were a luxury item and a symbol of status - link to source) for the ultra rich that benefited from colonization

so, lorenzo is not only a colonizer, but he's a part of the elite. the fact that his family could afford to have a painting of him as a BABY (portraits were almost exclusively adult portraits, and usually of the whole family, unless you were even richer than the rich. and even then individual portraits were usually to celebrate important achievements such as a marriage or acquisition of state - a baby being born doesn't qualify, especially because at the time most babies died not long after birth anyway), and a HUGE painting on top of that, shows that they were just. loaded in an incomprehensible way. im talking jeff bezos level of riches. they were the elite of the biggest colonial empire of their century. so, ironically, lorenzo was born with a silver spoon in his mouth - everything that he had, he was born having, and he specifically had because it was being stolen due to a dramatically violent process of genocide and slavery, that he believed to be entitled to simply because he was born a spaniard/white. that is all canon, because in the shverse mundane history is the same as in real life. EVERYONE who was born in the colonial elites was taught that they were entitled to shit from other countries, that they were superior not only to other ppls but also to their own people - let's not forget that this was way before the advent of republics, those were monarchies. the ppl who were part of the elite straight up believed they were superior to others by virtue of god

"woah woah woah but lorenzo is played by javier muñoz who's brown" yeah, which is unfortunate, but he is still canonically a colonizer. first off, because it's not like they wanted someone to be lorenzo and were looking for brown people - they were looking for someone javier could play because he's a bigshot broadway actor who was also a fan of the show, and then they picked lorenzo. probably because the sh showrunners don't fucking know the difference between a latino and a spaniard. or maybe they do, but they thought, "eh, close enough". either way, lorenzo is a spaniard, and he was born a colonizer - ergo, he is white, regardless of what race his actor is, regardless of even what he looks like. there are plenty of white spaniards with similar skin tones to lorenzo, because what today is spain used to be a territory occupied by middle eastern ppl, and there was mixing. what makes whiteness is not skin tone, it's context, and the context of being a literal colonizer directly benefitting of the oppression of black and brown people is as white as it gets

so, to recap: lorenzo was born a white colonizer, and he was RAISED believing that everything he had, he was entitled to. he was entitled to it by virtue of god, because he was born a part of the rich elite in the richest colonial power in the world, and he had access to everything he could possibly want. and he wasn't just entitled to riches and power - which he still has, look at his fucking mansion, dude - but specifically to superiority to his peers. especially black and brown people, the source of his riches, the people who owe him the wealth he takes from them

and then he joins the warlock world, and not only is he not royalty (because presumably he is the son of a regular demon, not too high up in the hierarchy) but some brown guy is. and this guy is in a position of power over him (high warlock) and he is better than him (at magic, specifically, but also at everything including being a human being, but lorenzo doesn't care about that). and lorenzo is fucking livid, because he believes himself to be entitled to be the best, entitled to be treated as a superior, entitled to admiration and to servitude, especially from people like magnus (let's not forget that the philippines - colonized by spain during the siglo de oro - are right next to indonesia [link]). instead, magnus is, politically speaking, his superior

and it's not like it even means much because the high warlock position is implied to be kind of like, the mayor, and it's not like magnus ever abused his power (unlike some people - and sidenote, i think this backstory is also why lorenzo was so comfortable using his power to antagonize magnus: because he was raised in a context where political power was pretty much boundless and politics and the personal feelings of the ruler were not separated). so in practice its really just that if lorenzo had a problem, he could go to magnus, and if magnus made a decision that referred to all warlocks, lorenzo was supposed to follow it. it's nowhere near like, actual subservience. but it's way too much for someone who was raised to be entitled to the level that lorenzo was

so that's why he has this feeling that magnus took something from him - because in his head, everything magnus has, lorenzo should be entitled to. because in his head, any and all power rightfully belongs to him, and if magnus has it, then it has been stolen. and that might not even be conscious of his part or whatever, altho i doubt lorenzo doesn't think in explicitly racist terms at least in private, but that had been ingrained into his head for centuries on end. if it's still ingrained into the heads of white spaniards born TODAY, imagine one who was actually born at the fucking height of racist exploitation

so. yeah. that's why lorenzo is such a jealous bitch. that's why he hates magnus so much - because he feels that magnus having anything at all lorenzo doesn't is theft, and ironically, he was born with a silver spoon in his mouth, but believes that he earnt what he has whereas magnus didn't. it's not just jealousy, it's a profound feeling of racist vendetta, and i'm sure the sh writers didn't mean it that way, they were just writing a big villain to bring malec together, but death of the author, baby! and this explanation actually makes sense without having to change anything in canon, so, i feel very comfortable saying that's why lorenzo behaves the way he does

THIS POST IS NOT ABOUT THE BOOKS

[tainbocuailnge]

Just wondering is there any servant you could form an effective master/servant team with? I’d just call most of them names and I’d be too busy fangirling over everyone from the King Arthur myth to get anything done.

im gonna summon jing ke and we’re gonna ditch the grail war to go kill jeff bezos and elon musk and all those other fascists billionaire clowns and then we get fucking hammered