#im no longer obsessing over my heart rate or my breathing convinced that im about to have a heart attack at any moment

[fipindustries]

today i fell asleep during yoga

at the end of every class we have a relaxation moment where we lay on our back, close our eyes and try to empty our heads of all thought while hearing relaxing music and the teacher gongs that special bowl gong bell that some yoga instructors have.

i fucking completly blacked out. i didnt even registered what happened. one second i was there and the next i was teleported a few minutes later. they tried to wake me in many ways by turning the lights on and calling my name and i didnt even registered it.

so yeah pretty good all in all

[poppysmc]

I Don't Know How You Do It But I'm Forever Ruined

Notes: This has been sitting in my drafts for so so long, unfinished with a different song and Im just obsessed with this song right now so I thought I'd go ahead and post it.. sorry for the mistakes I don't have a beta so they're all mine. I'm just slowly getting back to writing again, please be patient with me. ❤️

Song: Off my face - Justin Bieber

(One shot)

Last and certainly not the least…. Ms. Morgan Hughes, she’ll be gracing us with her angelic voice, singing… uhh… Off my face? Thomas reads the cue cards, slightly puzzled, he thought Morgan would be doing stand-up, he and Morgan’s posse endured long nights of practicing her stand-up routine and now she’s just gonna sing, it’s not even vetted on.

He glances to the side, silently confirming if it was right. Morgan nods and smiles nervously. He in turn smiles back, giving an encouraging thumbs up and a whisper of ‘good luck’ as she takes to the stage.

Some of the audience chuckled at the name choice, adding to the ever growing lump lodged in her throat. This is definitely not her best idea and before she could go ranting about the title, some of her friends clapped and cheered, giving her a slight boost of confidence.

She wrote thet a few months ago, absently plucking at the guitar strings. She’s got the same few chords stuck in her head for week. Only god knows how she pulled the lyrics out of her muddled brain.

How does one go about sharing her feelings for someone who has no idea? Said someone sitting front and center with a scowl, sitting next to her parents. She has no idea she wrote it for her, she sighs in relief.

For a split second she could see Poppy’s attention snap up to her, smirking and raising her eyebrow in question. Morgan rolls her eyes at her and settled into her chair and just like Poppy’s face never moved, her scowl was back in place, listening to Chloe rant about her talent to her right.

She starts plucking out the intro, it’s now or never.

One touch and you got me stoned

Higher than I’ve ever known

You call the shots and I’ll follow

Sunrise but the night’s still young

No words but we’re speaking tongues

If you let me I might say too much

Sometimes people just enter your life and burrow themselves so deep into it that for the life of you, you couldn't remember when it all started. This case was different, Morgan could vividly remember a day it all changed, how it became harder for her to even look Poppy in the eye for more than a few seconds. How her warm touch roughly pulling her back to the argument now seemed to burn through her sleeves, pressure slightly softer. She used to meet her hot gaze, faces only inches apart spitting out vicious insults without thinking much, now she didn’t have the same fire in her veins she seemed to have arguing with Poppy.

The need to antagonize her fizzled into something else, a warmth that threatens to overtake her made itself a home in her chest.

---------------

Morgan wanted to stay home, as much as she enjoyed parties, it wasn’t something she wanted to do regularly. Sometimes it gets a little too much to handle, the music felt too loud, the people got too close, the eyes on her felt stifling. She wanted to be free just this one night out of expectant looks but Zoey is too convincing, her puppy dog eyes are too powerful for a mere mortal like herself. She made a condition to just be at the party no over the top expensive clothes, just herself.

“I’ll come but just to be your glorified chauffer.” She dresses herself in something simple, a pair of black pants and flannel. “I just want to be invisible this one night, Zo.”

“Fine by me, but if your fashion choices end up splashed all over The T tomorrow don’t come crying to me.” Zoey shakes her head, the slight dig on her wardrobe is softened by a thankful grin.

“You get dragged on The T once, and no one lets you live it down.”

“Because I’m pretty certain I said don’t go out in that, it’s suicide. So yeah I would never let it go, you wore socks with your flip-flops and had the audacity to show yourself in public.”

“It’s not even my fault, sunny ran out the door. I had no time to check what I was wearing."

“You’ll never learn. Whatever will you do without me?” Zoey smirks and shakes her head affectionately. "Stop stalling and let’s go. My carriage awaits dear chauffer.”

“Yeah, yeah. Please allow me to escort you down, boss.” Morgan bumps her shoulders with Zoey as she passes by to grab her jacket. She opens the door and offers her arm, Zoey laughs and loops her arms around hers.

The party was already in full swing once they arrived. The music was blaring; the bass makes Morgan’s chest thump along erratically with every beat. “Text me, okay? I’ll make myself scarce.”

“Sure. Thanks for driving.” Zoey winks and beelines for the bar. In a few seconds she loses sight of her.

Morgan trudges through the house, the crowd gradually thins as she makes her way farther to the back. She exhales in relief finally free of the maze of drunk students with no boundaries, nobody seemed to pay attention to her, thank god for the dim lighting. The backdoor swings open, she breathes in the crisp night air. The door shuts and party fades into muffled thumps. She sat on the porch steps, her side leaning against the banister, oblivious to the pair of eyes quietly observing her.

After a minute of silence, Morgan sucked air through her clenched teeth, surprised at hearing someone pointedly clearing their throat behind her. The rate in which her head whipped back almost made her dizzy. When she recognizes who the person was, she could already feel the headache coming through, she almost swallows her tongue in disbelief. Of all the people she didn’t want to see her tonight was Poppy, yet here she was, alone with her.

“What are you doing back here?” Poppy asked, voice devoid of any venom just genuinely curious.

“Do I need permission to be? Who made you queen?” Morgan scoffs, the slight bite in her voice comes through and makes Poppy smirk.

“Belvoire.” Poppy cheekily answers, earning an undignified snort from Morgan. The slight tension momentarily forgotten.

“Should have seen that coming.”

“The party’s raging inside and little miss newbie sits here. What are you doing, really?” Poppy asks not unkindly, voice tinged with concern and curiosity.

“I could ask the same to you.”

“I asked first.” Poppy frowns impatiently.

Morgan sighs, opting to just answer just to avoid trouble. She didn’t have the energy to make up excuses nor to argue. “I don’t feel like partying today. I’m just waiting for Zoey to get flat out drunk and drive her home. My turn.”

“It’s-  It’s overwhelming inside. I just want to be alone for a while.” The honesty in Poppy’s answer momentarily throws her off.

“Do you want me to go?” Morgan asks, feeling like she’s intruding. This must be the longest record they ever had being civil to one another, actually speaking without the sarcastic comments and the insults. It makes her feel out of place and awkward.

“You could do whatever you want. I’m not the queen of anything right now.” Right, cause technically it's Chloe. There’s something in her tone that makes Morgan’s heart clench, yet she shrugs it off as the bass from the party. To Morgan’s never ending surprise, the blonde pats the spot next to her on the bench. “The floor is filthy.” Poppy clarifies when she makes no move to stand. A disarming smile crosses her face, Morgan guessed her hesitation must have been showing.

Morgan stands and dusts herself off. “Who are you and what have you done to Poppy?” She asks with a grateful smile, sitting down the furthest she could from the other girl.

“I have half the mind to kick you off this bench.” Poppy grumbles.

“There she is.”

Poppy huffs out a half laugh and after that there’s just silence. After a while she could see the slight tremble in Poppy’s hand in her periphery. She wordlessly shrugs off the coat she’s wearing and offers it to the other girl.

“What?” Poppy blinks, eying her coat suspiciously, making Morgan chuckle in disbelief.

“You’re cold. Take it or go inside.”

“Fine.” Poppy slips on the offered garment, appreciating the warmth it gave to her cold limbs. She wasn’t thinking while she burrowed herself further, letting Morgan’s scent envelope her. She stared at Morgan, feeling guilty for a moment. She moves closer, Morgan shivers when their shoulders touched. "Thanks." Poppy whispers, if it wasn't for their proximity, Morgan might have missed it. She hoped the shadows hid the small smile spreading to her lips.

“I’m sorry for taking your coat. I just couldn’t go back inside. I-” Poppy trails off, breaking her gaze away and staring farther up the yard.

“It’s okay, I offered. You don’t have to explain anything.” Morgan understood, after today everything changed, she lost her spot to one of her friends. Morgan was somewhat surprised that instead of Poppy's explosive anger, she opted to just sit here and mope.

She jumps a little when her phone vibrates in her pocket, she could see Poppy smirk in the corner of her eye.

"Jumpy."

She reads the text and taps a reply, frowning. She turns to Poppy. She doesn't even know why she's explaining but it felt wrong to just go without saying anything. A part of her wanted to make this moment stretch a little longer, so she hesitates.

“Apparently Zoey doesn’t need me to drive her back. So... I guess I'll head back home." Morgan stands not having an excuse to stay longer and makes her way to the door, hands hovering over the door knob to open it but not before doing something stupid like asking her so called enemy if she wanted to drive around for a while.

“So… Do you still want company? We could drive around for a while?” Morgan mentally chastises herself for the suggestion. Of course Poppy would say no it’s not like she-

Morgan looks back at Poppy, she sees her worrying her bottom lip between her teeth in thought. Morgan’s gaze flickers down to her lips, wondering if they’re as soft as they looked. The moment passed and she breaks her gaze away just as Poppy decided.

“Sure but let me just get my stuff.” Poppy stands and makes her way to the door, Morgan standing motionless, hand over the handle. She reaches for it, her fingertips grazing Morgan’s, the slight static made her pull her hand away abruptly.

“Sorry.” Morgan breaks through her short circuited brain and moves to hold the door open for Poppy.  “I’ll wait for you out front.” Morgan makes her way back through the crowd, her mind reeling at what happened back there and what mess she got herself into.

---------------

She continued singing, her eyes accidentally meeting Poppy’s gaze again, her scowl was replaced by an unreadable expression, attention now focused solely on her and Morgan almost faltered. She breaks eye contact and stares at the back wall, ignoring the burning gaze upon her from those familiar eyes.

Your touch blurred my vision

It’s your world and I’m just in it

Even sober I’m not thinking straight

Cause I’m off my face in love with you

I’m out my head so into you

And I don’t know how you do it

But I’m forever ruined by you

-----------------------

The sound of the door opening breaks Morgan out of her deep thoughts. She could see Poppy walking towards her with a sour expression, she's still wearing Morgan's coat.

“What happened to you?” Morgan’s warm hands reaching out to her, settling comfortably on her shoulder. Poppy stares at her hands, she pulls it away like she’s been burned.

“Just drive.” Poppy mumbles, trying hard to be composed but failing.

“Where to?” Morgan pretends not to notice Poppy's agitation, barely glancing at her so she won't feel uncomfortable. She unlocks her car slipping inside while Poppy stares at the abomination in front of her.

“I don’t want to sound ungrateful but your truck is… I don’t know how to say it without offending you? But maybe it could use a good wash? Like you drove through mud to get here. I don’t know, maybe we could go to a carwash, my treat.”

"That’s about the rudest thing anyone’s ever said to me, and you said a lot of insulting things before." Morgan rolls her eyes. “She doesn’t mean that Betty, you just got a little mud on you.” She murmurs quietly.

“You named your car… Betty?”

“What? No I didn’t.” Morgan could see Poppy’s amused smirk even in her periphery.

“You’re such a dork.” Poppy can’t help but laugh at her mortified expression.

Morgan distracts herself from the rapidly rising heat on her neck by fiddling with the radio before driving off. The sweet sound of the guitar filtered through the car and she smiles triumphantly, previous embarrassment pushed to the back of her mind. She doesn't notice Poppy's expression soften.

Morgan drives her car through the carwash. They watched the water and the soap assault her car, the material of the brushes made a repetitive sound along with one of her favourite songs. Poppy had her seat leaned back, watching the machine rid the car of dust and mud. There was something mildly intimate about it, Morgan could move her right hand then they would be grazing Poppy’s, she could do it, she wanted to do it. But all she could manage was a slight twitch in her pinky, her hand doesn't move any closer.

“Do you ever feel like there’s a hundred people around you in a room, yet you feel alone?” Poppy breaks the silence, tilting her head slightly to the left to look at Morgan.

“Sometimes, yeah. Sometimes people may be looking at you yet feel as if their staring right through you, like your nothing. Oh! Like a ghost.” This makes Poppy chuckle.

“Yeah like that. It would have been easier if we were ghosts at least then you know why.”

“Did you feel like that back at the party?” Morgan wanted to say how that would have been impossible that no one could have seen her, she’s seeing her now. She wondered how could anyone ever take their eyes of her, she always seemed to be the brightest thing in any room she entered and now even in this dingy carwash she looked so radiant. How sometimes she thinks that she picks fights with her just for a chance to be bathed in her light. Thoughts she doesn't think would ever cross her mind trickled slowly and became a raging river. Now that she found herself here with her, without anything familiar to fall back on, anything just to distract herself out of her dangerous thoughts.

“Yeah, I don’t know. It was easier to be alone than surrounded but feeling alone. Do you get it? At least I know, I chose to be alone.”

“I get it.” If she had the ability to say more she would have but these few pathetic words are all she could manage. This time her hand reaches to squeeze Poppy’s. A quiet comfort to reinforce her words, she understood.

“Thank you.”

Whatever atmosphere they created in that moment fell apart when Morgan had to move her car forward and exited the wash.

“Where to now?”

“Your turn to choose.” Poppy mumbles, still staring blankly outside.

“Okay, I know a place. You're gonna love it."

“I’m not going to let you pick anymore.” Poppy complains, standing in front a fluorescent lit diner. It almost glowed but in a weird way, like a bat signal for the weary.

“Hey! They make the best food.” Morgan steps forward and drags her companion along when she hesitated.

Warmth and the ambient sound of cutlery grazing the plates makes Morgan smile. She always came here when she’s feeling lonely, missing her parents, their farm or when she’s stressed from school, for trying to fit in like a robot.

“Come. Don’t just stand there.” Morgan looks back at Poppy, her breath caught in her throat. Poppy looked ethereal against the most basic place there ever is. If you said diners were some kind of portal to somewhere else she’d accept it and move on, for she looked like she existed out of place, alien, untouchable as she was beautiful. For the second time this day her gaze flickers to Poppy’s lips, she realizes that she’s saying something and Morgan’s mortified of being caught staring like a fool.

“What? Is something on my face?” Poppy is thankfully oblivious.

“No, it’s perfect.” Morgan quietly whispers while Poppy checks herself in the diner’s window, her words falling into deaf ears.

Morgan balls up pieces of her straw paper places it over some torn up tissues, stacked together. She’s fidgeting under Poppy’s presence; she doesn’t know what to do with her hands.

She's startled when Poppy lightly grasps her hands stopping it from tearing up another piece of paper. It’s been minutes of watching Morgan tear up even rectangles of several tissues, a girl could only take so much.

“You’re making a mess.” Poppy chastises her like a child. She would have laughed but Poppy still hasn’t let go of her hand, it’s making her blush like an idiot.

“Sorry. It’s just that the food is taking a while huh?” Morgan stealthily tries to take her hand back but Poppy only holds it tighter. When they're not arguing, Morgan found that she doesn't know how else to act around her.

“Stop tearing paper like confetti.”

“Sorry.” Morgan sheepishly apologizes and Poppy lets go of her hand, hiding hers under the table, flexing it, she could still feel the warmth of her hand in hers.

The food arrives and Morgan smiles widely. Poppy stares, pretending she's interested in what food Morgan ordered. She admits to herself that for all the times she stared at her she never noticed how beautiful Morgan’s smile was. Arguing doesn't leave one space to insert a smile. It made her heart skip, imagining how it would be like if it was directed at her.

She almost misses Morgan stealing a fry off her plate. “Hey! If you wanted some you should have bought your own or at least politely asked.” Poppy mock glares at her companion, taking one of the crumpled balls and flicking it, hitting Morgan right between the eyes. They watched as the paper landed right into Morgan’s half empty milkshake glass.

"Your face!" Poppy laughs, wishing she could have captured it on camera.

Morgan found that she liked Poppy's laugh when it was genuine. “You better buy me another. You ruined mine.”

“What? It’s almost all gone anyway. All the needless calories you’re consuming will bite you in the ass someday.”

“I’ll take my chances.”

“Just have the rest of mine.” Poppy slides over her milkshake, Morgan grins and takes a sip right into Poppy’s straw. Poppy noticed first, eyes widening. Did She just… A revolting question crossed her mind, how would ‘Morgan’s lips feel like pressed to mine.’ Shes never felt jealous of a piece of plastic before in her life.

Morgan freezes when she realized what she’s done. She just had an indirect kiss with Poppy through the straw. “Sorry. I got excited.”

Poppy opens a new straw for her water, blowing the other end right into Morgans face, another bulls eye, she’s killing it. “Don’t overthink it.” She dismisses the act but her brain does summersaults inside her skull.

They finished eating, the last few of Poppy’s fries stolen right under her nose. She pretends she doesn’t see her sneaking a few of the fries away, she just lets her. Mind preoccupied with important things like Morgan’s lips.

------------------

Can’t sleep ‘cause I’m way too buzzed

Too late now you’re in my blood

I don’t hate the way you keep me up

Your touch blurred my vision

It’s your world and I’m just in it

Even sober I’m not thinking straight

Even if she doesn't look or at least tries her hardest not to, she could feel Poppy's gaze on her, burning, willing her eyes to look back. There's something wildly intimate about singing a song to someone and in the sea of strangers you know it's just for them. No matter how many people sang it, to another, to themselves or just for the heck of it, the song only belongs to the person you made it for. Just for her. They could never feel the way she felt when she wrote it, how her feelings were entwined with every word.

In her periphery she could see Poppy stand and make excuses to her parents. She left, she didn't see where she went, she doesn't dare look anywhere near where she was, she's a coward like that. All she could feel is disappointment. It takes everything in her not to show it on her face. Was it too late to change her talent to stand up?

----------------------------------

"Come on Poppy, pick a place already. I've been driving around for hours! People will think we're stalking someone around here." Morgan whines in the driver seat taking yet another turn around the block.

"It's been exactly 20 minutes. You're such a baby." Poppy looks at her phone for any places that might still be open around this time. "Turn right, that's not right. Right! Not left."

"Great, now were going in circles. Pull over."  Poppy grumbles.

"What?" Morgan looks confused for a moment but does what she’s told anyway, parking along the street.

"Get out."  Poppy moves to exit the car.

"What are you..?"

"I'm not gonna hijack your car, just let me drive. You suck at following directions."

"...."

They switch seats, Morgan slumps and mopes in hers. Poppy fights back a smile.

“Would you look at that it only took 2 minutes.” Poppy smiles smugly.

“I did all the navigating you only had to turn once.” Morgan complains, getting out of the car and looking around the parking lot. “What the hell Poppy, a 711? You could have told me, I could have turned anywhere and found one.”

“Like hell you could. You don’t even know your left from your right.” Poppy laughs at Morgan’s offended expression. They walked in, shoulders brushing together and Morgan shivers, insisting to herself that it’s because it’s cold.

Poppy smiles, victoriously pulling out what they came here for out of the fridge.

“A freaking capri sun? We drove all the way here for that?” Morgan complains, ready to throttle Poppy. Though there’s something endearing in her expression, that proud smile for finding something she was looking for.

“Just go find something you want.” Poppy shoos her away, grabbing a few more pouches of juice. She shakes her head and walks off in search of snacks.

Morgan comes back with an armful of sweets and chips.

“We just ate. What are you doing? Take these back, I won't buy you all these.”

“You said something I like. I like them all. Come on aren't you rich?” Morgan dumps her haul in the counter, the cashier looking back and forth from them, looking for a sign that it’s okay to scan the items.

“Are you just an overgrown kid or what?”

“Pop, you just bought a juice in a pouch, you have no right to judge me.”

“Fine.”

Morgan carries three bags worth of snacks back to the car, Poppy not attempting to lift a finger just because she paid.

“Your turn. Pick a place.”

Minutes later they're on a cliff overlooking the city. Fading notes from a song playing in Morgan’s car filtered to the back.

“I'm surprised you didn't get lost.”

“I don't suck at directions. You're the one that sucked at giving them.” Morgan says in self-defence. She unlatches the back so they could sit on it, holding Poppy’s waist, helping her up. If Poppy noticed her hands shake, she didn’t say anything. They sat closer together, leaning against the side. She could feel the cold seeping into her shirt, making her shiver. Poppy notices and moves to take Morgan's coat off.

“No. Keep it on.” Morgan stops her, cold hands over equally cold ones.

“But you're cold.”

“I'm not.” Morgan attempts to refute it but her hands are freezing.

“I can see your teeth chattering.”

“I like it on you.” She smiles softly.

“What?”

“I don't want you to be cold. Just take it, don’t be stubborn.”

“If you speak of this to anyone, I would personally kill you in your sleep.”

“Why would you do- oh.” Morgan stared in confusion, then realization.

Poppy moved to sit in the space between her legs, leaning her back into Morgan, taking her hands and wrapping them to her waist. Her hands rubbing over Morgan's freezing ones. To say that she was now warm was an understatement, she was burning from the blush that overtook her body.

“If you wanted to be near me so bad you could've just asked.” Morgan grins, chin propped on Poppy's shoulder.

Poppy huffs and attempts to get up. Morgan's arms stop her, wrapping tighter, keeping her in place. “Don't move, I might freeze to death.”

“That's what I thought.”

They had a toast with the Capri sun pouches, laughing at the ridiculousness of it all. They sat there talking for hours, the company was too enjoyable to give in to exhaustion or cold.

From the time they were talking Poppy shifted her position, now sitting on Morgan's lap, staring up at her while she told a story about their farm animals, making her scrunch her nose in disgust at one of her retellings.

They stared at the sky surprised to see the day chasing the night away. How long have they been talking? Morgan looks at her phone and even more surprised that it's nearly 6am. Time went by so fast.

“I always wanted to see the sunrise from here. Thanks for the company.” Morgan smiles softly, running her fingers through her hair to distract herself from Poppy.

No one mentioned how one of their hands are still interlaced together or how Morgan's thumb drew circles on the back. Especially not Poppy's lips softly grazing the underside of her jaw.

They watched in silence, both aware that as the night was done, so will this new moment they found together.

“I'll take you to back to your dorm.” Morgan reluctantly says, unwilling to move. It was Poppy who moved off her first.

Morgan slides off the back of her truck smirking at Poppy. “Want a piggy back ride?”

Poppy scoffs. But positions herself anyway, her arms wrapped on Morgan's shoulders, Morgan's hands holding her legs securely as she closes the small distance to the front of her car.

They drove back in silence, neither speaking of the moment, afraid it will be over soon.

Morgan stops her car in front of Poppy’s sorority house, tapping her fingers anxiously against the steering wheel.  No one talked nor moved for a minute or two, they just stared at each other feeling the change in whatever relationship they previously held. Poppy’s alarm goes off, effectively ruining their moment.

“I guess... I'll see you later. Good Morning, Poppy.” Morgan smiles softly, hands gripping the steering wheel too tightly, knuckles going white, stopping herself from reaching out.

“I’ll… see you later. Thank you for driving me around.” They both know they will see each other but not in the same capacity as tonight, they will be back to being rivals, enemies, whatever the school made them out to be. She could see Poppy fighting a losing battle against herself before she reached out and kissed the corner of Morgan's mouth. She turns away like nothing happened and exits the car without looking back.

-------------------

Cause I’m off my face in love with you

I’m out my head so into you

And I don’t know how you do it

But I’m forever ruined by you

Cause I’m off my face in love with you

I’m out my head so into you

And I don’t know how you do it

But I’m forever ruined by you

Morgan stands and bows to the applause, yet she felt empty. It all felt useless somehow, she wasn't even there to hear the rest of it. She makes her way backstage, turning the corner as the next talent comes up. She felt like running but before she could turn and walk away, Poppy pushes herself off the wall and approached her. She gulped, unsure of what to do.

“Your voice is very beautiful.” Poppy tells her, voice almost as soft as a whisper. She's searching Morgan’s terrified eyes for something. “The song, did you write it?” She asks all the while moving closer, hands fiddling with the lapel of Morgan’s suit.

All she could do is nod, not trusting her voice at the moment. She takes a step back and another and another until her back is against the wall but Poppy follows her every step. Thank god they seemed alone or she would have burst into flames in embarrassment. Poppy steps closer until their bodies are almost touching.

“Who did you write that song for?”

“I...”

“Tell me.” Poppy looks up almost pleading, wanting to hear what she hoped to.

“It’s for you.” Morgan presses herself even more to the wall, wishing it would just swallow her up. She closes her eyes but it flies open when she heard Poppy gasp. “Are you surprised or?” Morgan trails off, observing Poppy’s expression going from astonished, to happy and outright tearing up.

“I can’t believe you wrote that song for me, I thought that there was someone else.” Poppy breathes in relief, Morgan’s hands wrap around her waist, supporting her weight.

“Just you.” Morgan says breathlessly. Watching her break into a smile made all the nerves she had vanish. She pulls her into a tight hug, smiling when she feels Poppy sink into the embrace. Her head leans on her shoulder and she rests her cheek on her hair. Poppy pulls back and smiles before leanig up and kissing Morgan.

[horansqueen]

You & Me : chapter 25

A Niall Horan fanfiction ; rated MA

Sequel to AM CONVERSATIONS

CHAPTER 1 || CHAPTER 2 || CHAPTER 3 || CHAPTER 4 || CHAPTER 5 || CHAPTER 6 || CHAPTER 7 || CHAPTER 8 || CHAPTER 9 || CHAPTER 10 || CHAPTER 11 || CHAPTER 12 || CHAPTER 13 || CHAPTER 14 || CHAPTER 15 || CHAPTER 16 || CHAPTER 17 || CHAPTER 18 || CHAPTER 19 || CHAPTER 20 || CHAPTER 21 || CHAPTER 22 || CHAPTER 23 || CHAPTER 24

NOTES:

-one chapter is her pov, the next is his. -4.1k -im sorry, i never proofread, i hate it. -there WILL be smut. but not only smut. -this is a romance, comedy, smut story. -for the summary, check my MASTERLIST.

- notes: honestly i know this is a boring chapter and im sorry about it.

if you want to be on the list of blogs i notify when this is updated, just message me :)

requests! : none for this chapter im sorry! i sorta needed her to come back first and... yea. keep sending them tho!

Chapter 25 : His chapter

NIALL

She didn't answer anything. I waited for hours and she didn't dare even answer anything about the video I sent her. I wish she would have at least acknowledged it. I would have been fine with a heart emoji even if I would have preferred a comment about how much she loved and missed me. But she sent nothing and it was worse than anything she could have answered.

I kept thinking about her and Dylan and it was driving me insane. In fact, I couldn't stop thinking about her on top of him, riding him and moaning his name. It was obsessing me to the point where I just wanted to take a plane to her and bring her back home with me.

I tried calling her in the afternoon but she didn't answer and although I was trying to convince myself that she was probably sleeping, I knew that it was not late enough for her to be asleep, even with the jetlag.

I waited almost 24 hours to hear from her and when my phone rang, I realized someone was trying to facetime me. I saw her face on the screen and my heart jumped so high in my chest I thought I was about to vomit it. I almost dropped my phone on my face and stopped moving before breathing in and out for a few seconds. I finally answered and my lips curled when I saw her face. Her hair was a mess, she had dark circles under her eyes and she looked exhausted.

"Hey darling, what time is it in Italy?"

She raised her nose up and groaned low. "Fuck, did I wake you up? I'm so sorry." she apologized with a grimace. "It's four in the morning here."

"No, it's okay, it's 7 pm here." I tried to reassure her and chuckled. "Actually, I didn't sleep much last night."

She frowned and tilted her head but I hesitated to tell her how I felt. I let my eyes roam on her face for a few seconds and finally sighed. I had been worried about her and clearly, I had the right to. Of course, there was more than that. I had also been scared of what she was doing, and perhaps a bit jealous, but I didn't have to mention that.

"You're already in bed?" she asked with a small smile.

"Yea, I tried to read a bit, and watch tv, but I ended up just writing a few song lyrics." I explained with a shrug.

"Are you alright?"

"Liv, you haven't given me any news since you left. I messaged you, and I tried calling, but you didn't answer." I pointed out a bit louder. "Look, I was worried, okay."

Her traits softened and she looked at me with a guilty expression.

"I'm so sorry, Niall, you're right. I've been super busy. The auditions ended late, and we have more tomorrow and an interview. After the auditions we had a meeting that lasted like 3 hours. I'm super tired. You're right though, I should have taken a few minutes to call or at least message you. Please, forgive me."

I licked my lips and sighed low. "You're okay, that's all that matters. Did you get my video?"

This time, her face completely changed and the smile she sent me was so loving, fond and soft that I couldn't help but smile too. She pressed her lips together and all I could think about was kissing her.

"I did. I had just landed and I was at the airport still." she admitted in a low voice. "I was crying and a guard came to check on me."

She let out a short embarrassed chuckle and I smiled more, raising my eyebrows. "You cried?"

Her face became more serious but her gaze was still soft. "Yes. I love you, Niall. I love you so much. I almost took a plane back to you after seeing that. I just..." she shook her head and glanced away before looking back at me. "I wish  I could have stayed with you. I wish I could be with you right now."

"Me too." I replied with a smile as she leaned against the headboard of the bed, making me frown. "Hey, where are you right now?"

She looked around herself for a few seconds and looked back in my eyes again.

"Hotel room." she shrugged, making me frown more.

"I thought you'd be at your boyfriend's apartment." I admitted blatantly, making her face change suddenly. "Is everything okay?"

"I'm good, don't worry. He's still filming and this hotel is closer to where I have to be tomorrow." she grimaced but I could feel something was wrong. "I have to be up in six hours. I'm even lucky they let me wake up so late."

I pushed away all the thoughts and questions in my head to focus on her and the time we had together instead. Of course, I was curious, but at the same time, I was not sure I wanted to know. Her marriage and her boyfriend were touchy subjects, for me but also for her, I could feel it every time one of us would mention something, and I was not in the mood to talk about that. If she wanted to discuss anything with me, though, I knew she would.

"I don't really want to hang up." I admitted with a small smile. "When are you coming back home?"

"I tried to get a flight for tomorrow night, but I got one in the middle of the night." she explained, surprising me but making her smile grow. "I just can't wait."

I remained silent for a few seconds, wondering why she was coming back so fast instead to spend time with Dylan, but I decided not to ask. It was stupid, but I didn't want to give her the idea to stay longer, and I also didn't want her to think I didn't care that she'd spend time with him. If I wanted to be honest, I also really wanted her to come back so I just smiled more.

"I think you should drop by my place, first."

She laughed this time, closing her eyes and leaning her head on the headboard as her nose raised up. It made me chuckle to see her laugh so honestly and when her eyes fluttered open, she was smirking.

"And why exactly?"

"I don't know." I shrugged. "You could get naked and join me in bed. What time are you supposed to land?"

"Five in the morning." she explained with a sigh.

"Do you want me to pick you up?" I proposed, moving on my bed to lean on my pillows better.

"Naa, you don't want an other article about us, do you?" she pointed out, raising her nose up again. "I'll take a cab and give your address."

I wanted to tell her that articles about us didn't bother me and somehow, at that exact moment, it wouldn't have been a lie, but in general, yea, I hated paps and how they'd always write bullshit just to sell and get clicks.

"And then?"

"And then get naked and join you in bed." she replied with a smirk, using my own words. "You know, just thinking about it makes me horny." she added in a low tone. "And you being almost naked right now doesn't help."

I boomed out with laughter and a smirk appeared on my lips. It felt so natural to have that kind of discussion with her even if we had been separated for so long. I watched as her eyes dropped to my chest and shook my head.

"You're literally eyeing me right now, and you're not even trying to hide it." I pointed out, trying to keep my laughter in. "And you're wearing too much clothes for me to do the same."

"Mm, well, it's not my fault you're not wearing a shirt." she pointed out, not even looking in my eyes. "If you could just... move your phone a bit."

"Such a horny girl."

It made me think of that time when we were dating and I was gone in Asia with my cousins. It was the first and only time we had facetime sex and just thinking about it made my heart jump in my chest. I wanted to do it again, tell her what to do and when to do it, watch her touch herself and cum while she moaned my name.. but I knew she was tired and I didn't want to insist too much.

"Do you remember when-"

"Oh yea, oh yea I remember." she cut me, making me raise my eyebrows. "When you ran out of that bar and got back to that tiny disgusting and dark room just so we could masturbate together on the phone. I fucking remember, Niall. You made me start touching myself in the car."

"If I was there right now, I'd touch you and do all the job. You'd have nothing to do. I'd just make you cum and then you could fall asleep."

"Mm, I wish you would be here right now, then." she admitted with a yawn, squirming to lay down in bed as I chuckled and rolled my eyes. "Especially that you promised me your tongue and lips between my legs. Do you know how many times I thought about it? Mm, no one tongue fucks me like you."

I laughed again. "Oh god, you've got such a filthy mouth."

"Me? More like you." she laughed too, closing her eyes. "You're gonna eat me out good next time we see each other, yea?"

"I fucking promise." I guaranteed, bringing my hand to my cock and brushing it over my boxers. "I'll make you scream."

I watched her almost fall asleep and smiled a bit but after a few seconds, I felt the words escape my lips.

"Before we hang up, petal, can you show me your tits?"

Her eyes fluttered open and she let out a short but silent laugh. "You just can't help yourself, can you?" she shook her head. "I sent you a picture of my boobs already, don't you have it anymore?"

"Of course I do! It's my phone's background!" I joked, watching her face change into terror and making me laugh. "Babe relax, I'm joking! It's just even better when it's live."

"I'm ready to give you five seconds of seeing my boobs but in exchange, I want you to stay on the phone with me until I fall asleep."

My traits softened and I sent her a small smile. I would have agreed with that against nothing at all, just because I loved the fact that she felt safe with me, and because I missed her.

"Mm, okay, five seconds of seeing them, and five more while you touch them."

She chuckled and shook her head before putting her phone away. All I could see was the ceiling for a few seconds but when she put her phone back, she had taken her shirt off and was now laying under the sheets. My eyes quickly found her breasts and my lips curled slightly.

"Is it cold there?" I asked, amused.

"It is, you little fucker."

I laughed again and she finally moved her phone up, making me groan. "You promised me five more of touching them."

"I'm touching them."

"But I can't see!" I argued, making her laugh.

"You didn't specify that."

I groaned and grimaced before using puppy eyes while staring at her. Her eyes were half-closed and I knew she was going to fall asleep soon.  She chuckled and rolled her eyes and I was glad I didn't even have to beg her. She moved her phone farther and I saw her fingers rub gently against her nipples. I was about to ask her to grab her tits harder but she just did it and I let out a short curse word as I gripped the sheets of my bed.

"Fuck you make me so hard." I whispered right before she started giggling like a school girl.

"I remember before we dated, you said you were too old to get hard just by the sight of boobs." she told me. "I guess that's not true anymore, if it ever was."

"Darling, it's not just boobs. It's you, touching and grabbing your boobs, and making all these sexy little sounds, I bet you don't even realize it. Fuck yea, you make me hard. I want to tap my cock on them until it's hard enough to wreck you."

She rubbed her eyes with her free hand and whimpered low before grabbing the blankets of the bed and pulling them over her shoulders. She turned around and leaned the phone on a pillow while grabbing the other one and cuddling it.

"Mm, well, maybe you can do that when I get back." she proposed in a mumble. "You can even do that while I'm sleeping if it turns you on."

“I’ll remember that.” I chuckled and watched her lips part slightly and her eyes close. She looked peaceful but I knew that in less than a minute, she was going to be snoring. "Hey, petal." I whispered.

"Mm?"

"I'm in love with you." I added, seeing the left corner of her lips move up slightly. "Goodnight, darling."

                                                 ---

I woke up horribly early just to be sure I wouldn't miss her interview. She had sent me a link and I just stayed in bed, still half-sleep, thinking that I'd just get a few more hours of sleep when it would be over but when I saw her appear on the screen with a big smile, I felt suddenly completely awake.

I had stayed about fifteen minutes just looking at her the night before while she was sleeping and just like I thought, she had been snoring, her face all pressed on the pillow and even if it had made me smile, it was crazy how endeared I had been. If I was not sure she was the only girl I would ever want to spend my life with already, after that it was impossible to have any doubt left. Of course, I didn't need anything to convince me that we were meant to be, but these simple reminders of how much I loved her and everything she did were good and comforting.

She started answering questions about why she was in Italy, and how the auditions were going, and I couldn't help but think it felt weird to watch my best friend being interviewed on a tv show. It made me realize that it was probably how she felt the first few times she saw me on tv and it felt weird to have the roles reversed for once.

"Did you have time to visit? Or do you plan on doing it later?"

She smiled and it made me smile too. "I didn't really have time and I have a flight back home tonight, so I probably won't have time but it's so beautiful here, at least from what I was able to see from my hotel room windows or from the short drives around." she chuckled. "I will definitely come back to visit. With someone, perhaps."

I grabbed my phone and quickly sent her a text message.

'I'll bring you to Italy to visit. I'll bring you anywhere you want to go.'

I put my phone away and looked as she reached for her pocket and it made me hold my breath. She was not supposed to bring her phone but she had and even worse, it seemed like it was on vibe. I let out a chuckle and shook my head. She was never really the type to follow the rules anyway.

"A few weeks ago there were pictures of Niall Horan and you coming out of a movie theater together and all the rumors about you two dating again appeared online." the man whom's name I forgot asked as Olivia nodded. "Neither of you denied or attested the rumors but you two are talking again which is a big deal. You hadn't been seen together since your break up back in november 2016."

"Uhm, yea well, we both moved to California and we met randomly and... you know, when someone has been your best friend for two decades, it's hard to just.. couper les ponts you know, cut the ties?" she let out, raising her eyebrows. "Niall was part of my every day life, I even went on the last One Direction tour with him, so to cut him from my life du jour au lendemain... it was not easy. It was sudden, and it was tough. For both of us. So yea, we talk again."

"I noticed that you add a lot of french words and expressions when you talk and I know you're from France but you've lived in Ireland most of your life so you know all of this in english."

"Mm, yea but french comes to me very easily. I talk to my parents a lot, especially recently, so I guess I'm just mixing both languages." she admitted with a laugh. "I'm sorry, I know it's bit annoying."

"Endearing." I corrected her in a whisper even if she couldn't hear me.

"No no, not at all." the interviewer argued. "How many seasons did you plan for this show?"

She answered the questions like a champ but I was surprised that there had been no question about her wedding or her boyfriend. They normally like to get into things like that and I thought that maybe she had specified that she didn't want questions about that. However, I would think if that was the case, she would have also told them not to ask her about me and yet, they did, and she didn't seem pissed.

I didn't mind that they asked about me much and her answer was great. I had never stopped myself from mentioning my friends in interviews when people asked, I just didn't like talking about who I was dating or who my songs were about specifically. After all, when people ask questions about that, they just want to know who you're shagging, and my sex life, along with my romantic one, was no one's business.

The tv show lasted about ten more minutes and a few minutes after it ended, I heard my phone and grabbed it, smiling again when I realized that the first thing she did was answer my text.

'The truth is, Niall, that I'll follow you anywhere you want to go. Whether it's Italy, space, or that big ass couch of yours. Lead me. I'm right behind.'

                                                          ---

We spend the afternoon texting each other back and forth and I knew she would be in deep shit if anyone realized she was distracted. It was still an audition afternoon and evening for her and she had mentioned that she wouldn't be able to sleep before getting on the plane, which would mean she would most likely be exhausted when she'd get back. Sleeping on a plane was never nice or reviving, and I knew what I was talking about.

As I was waiting for her answer, I started checking online to see if there were comments about her interview or if there were new pictures of her that had appeared online. The first article that popped, however, was about her boyfriend, and I almost skipped it until I read the title. I scrolled back up and clicked on it only to see a picture of Dylan appear. He was with some girl I didn't know and they were dangerously close to each other. Of course, it was just a picture, and it wouldn't be the first time paps would fool us into believing crap. Sometimes, just the angle of the picture could make you believe things and I was hoping this picture was no exception. I stared at it for a few seconds before reading parts of the articles and grimacing. I couldn't just send that to Olivia and ruin her trip and I just decided to ignore it. Perhaps I could tell her later, when she'd be back, but I still was not sure.

I jumped when I got her reply but smiled quickly when I realized it was a selfie. She had her tongue out, her nose up in a grimace, and was literally doing the 'rock and roll' sign with her fingers. The caption said 'I'm coming home babey!' and I started laughing. I put my phone away and took a selfie as I was laying on the couch and just wrote 'I'm waiting for you' before quickly sending her.

She arrived in the middle of the night. At first, I was not sure what had woken me up and I just groaned and squirmed in bed, grabbing a pillow and pulling it close to me, my arms tight around it, but I heard an other thud and forced myself to open my eyes. It only took half a minute to see a shadow walk in my room and I stared at her as I saw her take her shirt and pants off quickly. I moved in bed to give her space and let out a short groan.

"I missed you, pet."

She moved closer and pressed her cold body against mine, my lips curling more when I realized she was completely naked and I suddenly regretted keeping my boxers on.

"How was your flight?"

"Mm, long and loveless." she complained, making me chuckle low.

I brought my lips to hers and kissed her gently before brushing them down her neck as my arm wrapped around her and pulled her closer.

"I'll give you love, angel." I whispered, running my hand on her back, feeling her soft but cold skin.

"What kind?" she just asked with a chuckle.

"Cuddles and caresses for now." I replied in a murmur. "Sweet sex in the morning."

"You know exactly what I want, at all times, don't you?" she replied just as low, making me smile as I kept my eyes closed.

She smelled good despite spending 13 hours on a plane and I wondered how it was even possible. I wanted to ask her if she had stopped at her place first or if she at least had spent some time in the bathroom to clean but I was too tired and I just kissed her shoulder before laying my head on the pillow again.

"Don't leave again, okay?." I muttered randomly. "Losing you is not an option."

She wasn't answering and with all the strength I still had, I once again forced my eyes open only to meet hers. She was sending me a small smile, her eyes also half-opened, and I smiled back slightly at her with a soft gaze.

"I'm definitely adding that to a song." I pointed out before she could answer, making her laugh.

"I'm not leaving, Niall." she just let out after a few minutes of silence. "I missed you too."

I tried to squeeze her in my arms but failed miserably. I was too tired to be strong but she seemed to appreciate the gesture. She chuckled and kissed my chin, sliding one of her legs between mine. My mind was too numb to think but I breathed in only to smell her again. My whole body was exhausted but I tried to fight slumber just to appreciate having her in my arms again, as if she had been gone for months and not just for literally two days. A bunch of things we had talked about came back to my mind and I just couldn't wait to have an other talk with her.

"You're not right behind me, Olivia." I mumbled with difficulty.

"Mm?"

"Earlier, in a text message, you said you'd follow me anywhere, that you were right behind me." I explained until I felt her fingertips brush along my spine. "You're not behind, you're right next to me. I'm holding your hand. I'm not going to lead you. We'll walk together, make decisions together, we'll take every step together, Olivia. Neither of us is leading or following. We're together."

"The dream team." she whispered before biting her bottom lip.

"The dream team. The only team that matters. You and me. Against the world." I pointed out with a smile before she repeated my words like an echo.

"You and me."

[beanabouttown]

do you have any super fluffy flinthamilton fic recs? its one of /those/ days

do i EVER (yes, yes i do) 

super fuffy fic rec list down below! (since you said flinthamilton i have only included james/thomas fic, but let me know if you want some fluffy flinthamiltons fic and i can direct you towards some good stuff!) 

Like a ghost. by LittleHouseMouse

It’s the first morning on the plantation after the reunion and Thomas Hamilton is awoken by a sound.

it’s short but sweet and im always here for fic about the first time james and thomas wake up together after the reunion 

I Want To Take Care Of You by Magnetism_bind

James is ill and Thomas just wants to look after him.

post-reunion fluff! flashback to london-era fluff! this fic just makes me happy, and it’s got thomas reading to james, which is always a good thing

Moments by TheAssassinsGhost

“'I can’t believe the days turned into years. I hate to see the moments disappear…‘”

15,743 words, 4 chapters, one of my all-time favourites! various snap-shots into james and thomas’ life after leaving the plantation 

Reorienting by Palebluedot

“Thomas grabs ahold of his holy apparition with both hands and keeps him there, draws him nearer. Let them hold each other until they both bruise, he thinks fiercely, for tenderness needn’t always step light. Love owes them kind wounds.” 

this fucking fic - it’s one of those ‘oh god this is the best fic i’ve read in weeks’ fics. im going to rec a lot of audrey’s fics and they are all as good as this one

Too Fondly to be Fearful by Palebluedot

“A hint of youthful mischief blooms in Thomas’s crow’s-feet as he brushes their toes together beneath the bedcovers. 

“Fancy a moment’s fresh air?”James grins. 

Outside, the scent of the roses hangs heavy as perfume, mixes sweet with every breath of cool night breeze. Thomas settles next to him on the step, barefoot and smiling, his arm warm around James’s waist.” 

james and thomas stargazing in the middle of the night, post-reunion. it’s fucking beautiful and i love it so much 

Things That Grow by Palebluedot

“Weeding, pruning, watering – though the tasks seem never-ending, it’s pleasant, welcome labor, working at a gentle pace, James’s voice as constant as the sun on his back, the sweetness of the roses he tends.

~+~+~+~+~

Something of a companion piece to “Too Fondly to be Fearful,” but can easily be read separately.”

james reading to thomas! happy post-reunion fluff! 

Pathos and Logos by Palebluedot

He should have been on his way ten lost minutes ago. With a sigh, with a parting kiss to the corner of Thomas’s mouth, James at last rises, and the sheets wind tight around his legs. The mattress dips behind him just as his feet brush the floor, and unseen fingers loosely encircle his wrist, keep him perched on the edge of the bed just long enough for a clinging shadow to press against his back, hold him fast about the waist.

“Stay a moment longer,” comes the sweet whisper in his ear.

happy London-era fluff - thomas trying to stop james leaving the bed. the first day this fic was posted i read it something like ten times 

Tactile by Palebluedot

“When Thomas opens his eyes, they stare and stare and seem to shine. “I wondered often how this might look,” he murmurs, pushing an errant lock behind James’s ear, fingers tracing over the shell. He looks down at James, adoration writ plain across his face, warm as the candlelight, and this is all still so strange to James, so new.

~+~+~+~

Inspired by bean-about-townn’s post: “Imagine the first time Thomas sees James’ hair out of its ribbon” and a related conversation with blanketed_in_stars.”

okay basically i should just say at this point that audrey (@brightbluedot) is the queen of fluff

Homecoming by Palebluedot

“That smile grows, and Thomas shall never find the strength to disentangle himself now, so he holds on all the tighter – three months, three months stranded with only the memory of James’s face, God only knows how he survived. But no matter. Now that he’s home, Thomas intends nothing less than to reclaim each and every intimacy the sea stole from them.”

look. if you just ignore the fact that thomas is taken away to bethlem right after this, it’s the fluffiest fic you are ever going to read in your life. 

…but if you read it with that in mind, then it will break your heart. so be warned!

Something Old by Palebluedot 

““Do you remember the first time I brought you home for Christmas?”

“The only time, you mean.”

Thomas grins, eyes sparkling with a fondness James doesn’t recall that battlefield of a holiday deserving. “Fifteen years later, that’s still one of my favorite memories of you.””

modern au fluff after james and thomas get married! 

Eye of the Beholder by Palebluedot

“Open your eyes for me, love,” Thomas reminds him, voice husky, and when he does, the first thing he sees is Thomas’s reflected grin, hungry as the gaze that caresses every inch of skin from James’s parted, panting lips down to his flushed and leaking cock. “Just look at you,” he sighs in James’s ear before he trails imprecise, open-mouthed kisses back down to James’s throat.

~~~

alternatively, that time bean was like “so what if they fucked in front of a mirror” and I was like “shit what if they DID”

i still maintain that this 100% happened at least once. (porn. really, really amazingly written porn. and so very fluffy) 

A Stranger at his Door by theflowercrownedking

“Silver comes looking for Flint. Thomas answers the door.” 

not one for fans of silver, and i fucking love it. thomas is clever, thomas isn’t expected to forgive silver for selling james into slavery and leaving them both in the plantation, and it ends with james and thomas snuggled up together in bed. what’s not to love? (i saw this fic just when i went to go through my bookmarks on ao3 to make this list, and im gonna be honest with you anon, i read it twice through before i could get back to putting together these recs)

Keeping him Safe by theflowercrownedking

“In which James manages to keep his werewolf nature a secret, right up until the moment he has a nightmare and shifts in Thomas’ arms.” 

i mean there’s some angst when it changes to james’ pov, but thomas, as always, is a ray of sunshine who illuminates james’ tragic life and it’s beautiful 

The Throes of Fever by theflowercrownedking

“In which James is feverishly sick, and convinced Thomas is an angel sent to care for him.” 

…i went to try and find a quote to put here to show how wonderful this fic is, but. it was all so good i couldn’t pick a single thing, which means you will just have to take my word for it!

Cache of Gems: Tumblr Ficlets by AstronautSquid

“An ongoing collection of the occasional short scenes I write for tumblr.

Varying ratings, check the chapter title!” 

second chapter is brilliant porn, but the first chapter is fluff and i love it so much - and only partly bc it’s a little bit my fault 

i am absolutely happy to read fic of James just staring at the back of Thomas’ head for an hour. who isn’t?? 

kinky nsfw ficlet 1 by @complaininginthedark

Anonymous asked: for the kink thing - cockwarming, if youre into it? your writing is amazing btw

aaahhhhh thank you so much!!!! I’ve already played with the idea of cock warming for these two simply because I think James is a little touch starved most of the time and is easily overwhelmed and needs grounding a lot. So here is my take on it.

it’s so very fluffy and i love it 

“I’ll keep you safe” by @complaininginthedark

bean-about-townn asked: ooh, 66 (“I’ll keep you safe”) for flinthamilton, which would. also be great for aftercare after the reunion (sorry im obsessed with the concept now. ur last fic was too good i can’t stop thinking about it)

aaaaaaaaah i prompted this and it’s still one of my favourite bits of writing in the fandom 

Vulnerable by khazadspoon

James needed to feel the sharp sting of his hand, the bite of his teeth, the grip of ropes at his hands and feet.

And Thomas would do anything, anything, to give James peace. Even if that peace was brought through pain.

– Post series, Thomas takes care of James after a rough night. Aftercare and comfort because I love these two too much –

it’s so fluffy and beautiful and it’s one of my all time favourites. no explicit sex, though the implication is there

let it snow, let it snow, let it snow! by NahaFlowers

It’s snowing outside and Thomas wants to go out and play in the snow, despite it being the dead of night. James’s protests are feeble at best - he can’t deny this man anything. Just cute fluff. Written for penflicks on Tumblr.

look. let’s be realistic. it doesn’t get much fluffier than thomas carrying james to bed 

Till Death Us Do Part by Palebluedot

And there’s that ache, and there’s that sweetness, and lord, James really would swear in the eyes of God that he cannot bear to live without him, wouldn’t he?

~+~+~+~

Those whom God hath joined together, let no man put asunder: a triptych.

james thinking about marriage in london, nassau, and after the reunion. the first and third parts are the fluffiest fluff ever to fluff, but the middle will break your heart in the best way 

Something like Home by enthugger

Sober, James thinks that Thomas Hamilton is brilliant. He is safe and warm and his presence is a soft glow that brightens the ridged structure of James’ mind. Drunk, he believes that Thomas should own the goddamn world.

imagine me making a sound akin to the sound one makes when seeing a particularly adorable kitten, and you’ll get an accurate idea of my reaction to this fic 

you are a constellation by ohCaptain (AngryPirateHusbands)

fluffy porn about thomas appreciating james’ freckles, absolutely lovely! 

im sure there’s more but im tired now. i hope your day gets better soon anon!