#im not even tired but my body is exhausted

[softieyume]

"Without You."

✿ Sylus x fem!reader (non mc)

✿ He finally realized what it felt losing you forever.

✿ angst. no comfort.

✿ somewhat continuation of Never Yours.

✿ rambles: ran out of diamonds and can't pull for Sylus card so im coping thru angst rn :')

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Life without you felt like hell.

Each day felt like torture for Sylus, he struggled to get through the day, constantly reminded of your absence in every single thing he does.

He found himself avoiding places that are filled with memories of you, like his collection room where you shared equal interest and fondness of said collections with him. The indoor greenhouse he had set up for you where you used to tend to your small garden with him.

And mostly, your old personal bedroom that was left untouched ever since your departure from his life.

Instead, Sylus threw himself into more work, trying to use his job as a distraction from his crippling grief. But no matter how tired he feels physically after working himself to exhaustion, he still found himself having trouble sleeping completely.

The empty space beside him in his bed was another painful reminder of what he's lost—he'd toss and turn, trying to sleep but his mind will start replaying memories of you. He'd often find himself reaching out to the other side of his bed, his hand searching for your warmth—but it was always met with a cold dreadful space.

The crushing realisation would hit him again, causing another wave of grief that made it even harder to sleep. He'd clutch a pillow, burying his face into it as he sobbed silently into the night.

His body felt weak and he looked paler compared to before, the only thing that kept him going was his determination to push through, yet the sadness in his eyes was visible to everyone around him. His appetite decreased drastically, Luke and Kieran had to force him to eat just to keep him from starving, despite fearing the consequence of Sylus's wrath. The loyal twins even resorted to asking help from her because they hoped at least she could snap some senses in him.

And unfortunately, not even Miss Hunter could fill the void you had left behind.

One night, Sylus had a particularly hard time sleeping. He toss and turned in his bed, his mind filled with images of you —your laugh, your smile, your touch, the feel of your skin against his own.

Each memory felt like a stab to his heart, causing his breathing to catch in his throat as he clutched his pillow tightly, his knuckles turning white from squeezing it too hard.

The grief was so overwhelming that he ended up hallucinating that you were still by his side and resting beside him on the bed that cold dreadful night.

Sylus slowly opened his eyes when he felt fingers lightly running through his hair, causing him to shiver a little at the familiar touch.

He slowly turned his head to look at the figure resting beside him and his heart skipped a beat at the sight.

You laid there on the bed, your hand gently running through his hair with a soft smile on your lips.

Sylus's breath caught in his throat, his heart thumped in his chest as he stared at you in disbelief.

*No.. this.. this can't be real...*

His mind was racing, he tried to reach out cautiously, his hand trembled as he slowly extended it, trying to touch your cheek to see if you were real.

As soon as his fingers made contact with your cheek, he almost gasped at your realness. You felt so warm, so smooth, so real, just like he remembered.

His eyes widened, his hand trembled even more yet he didn't pull his hand away, as if afraid that you'll disappear like a mirage if he moves.

Your smile widened, your hand moved from his hair to his hand, wrapping your hand around his own that's still on your cheek, pressing it lightly against your skin. "Hello, my love."

Sylus's heart raced even harder at the gesture, the feeling of your warm skin against his palm was like a dream come true.

His eyes searched your face, taking in every detail of you — from your warm eyes to your gentle smile—hoping that this isn't just a cruel hal—

"It's okay, Sylus...I'm here.."

Your voice was like a soothing melody that echoed in his mind, cutting his train of thoughts short, as it was the same voice that used to bring him comfort and happiness, the same voice that'd call his name gently.

Hearing it now, after thinking he'd never hear it again, made his eyes prick with tears as he swallowed hard, tightening his grip on you as his chest grew heavy.

Sylus couldn't bring himself to speak, his throat felt constricted as his heart raced, his mind struggling to process what's happening.

He pulled his hand away from your cheek, but before you could say anything, he suddenly wrapped his arms around you, pulling you close to him, as he buried his face into your neck, taking in your familiar scent and warmth.

You chuckled softly, your arms wrapping around him as you held him close, your hand gently rubbing his back in a soothing motion.

"You're clinging to me like a koala." You teased him gently.

Sylus felt like he could cry at your familiar teasing, he nuzzled his face into the crook of your neck, holding you tighter.

"Don't... don't leave me..." Sylus mumbled against your neck, holding you as tightly as he could, scared that you'd disappear again. His voice was strained and filled with emotion, his fingers clutched at the back of your shirt in a desperate grip.

Your smile softened, you held him tighter and stroked his hair tenderly.

"Silly.. Why would I leave you.."

Sylus took a deep shuddering breath, your words brought him a certain comfort but he still didn't want to let go, he wanted to hold onto you until this dream ends —no, he desperately prayed it wasn't a dream at all.

This was real. You were real. You were back.

Back to him.

For a moment, neither of you spoke. Both just lay there in each other's embrace in silence, cherishing the feeling of being close like this again.

Sylus continued to hold you tightly, his face buried in the crook of your neck. Your scent and warmth was intoxicating, it made him feel like he's finally home.

As your hand continued to stroke his hair, Sylus was filled with a sense of calm and comfort that he hadn't felt in a long time.

The weight of his grief and exhaustion started to lessen a little as he focused on the feeling of your fingers running through his hair and the sound of your steady heartbeat.

He relaxed a little in your arms, his grip on you loosened slightly as the exhaustion started to take over.

You continued to hold him, sensing his exhaustion and tiredness.

"You should sleep, it's late." You said softly, pressing a gentle kiss on his forehead, your hand still moving through his hair.

Sylus nodded against your neck, his eyelids were starting to feel heavy. The sound of your heartbeat was like a lullaby to him, making him even more sleepy.

"I love you, Sylus.. Forever and always.."

Sylus's heart thumped against his chest, the declaration of love from you made him want to stay awake with you longer. Unfortunately, fatigue soon overwhelmed him as his eyes slowly closed, the sound of your voice, the feeling of your warmth and the beat of your heart were like a soothing lullaby that made it hard to stay awake.

He tried to fight it, to hold onto you for a little longer, but the exhaustion was too strong and he soon fell into a deep slumber, believing he was held in your embrace.

When the next morning came, everything changed.

Sylus's eyes slowly opened, his mind groggy and disoriented, for a moment he was confused as to why he didn't feel the familiar warmth of you next to him.

He bolted upright in bed, his eyes wide as he looked around the room with a sinking feeling in his chest.

There was no sign of you anywhere, and the realization that it was all a dream shattered his heart all over again.

The empty sheets beside him were like a cold reminder that none of it was real. It had all been a cruel, beautiful dream that felt so true that he thought it was real.

Sylus's chest ached, a lump formed in his throat as he clutched the sheets in a tight grip.

"No....no...no..."

His eyes blurred with tears, his heart clenching painfully as he realized that he was all alone again.

*It was all a dream... She's not really here...*

The realisation hit Sylus like a punch to the gut, he felt a wave of despair wash over him as his heart ached with a deep, bone-crushing sorrow.

The room felt cold and empty without your presence, he felt so lonely and lost.

Without your smile, your voice, your warmth... Without you, everything just felt so bleak and hopeless.

You were really gone.

And there's no one to blame but himself.

[of-mutts-and-men]

pretty sure I'm PMSing right now and it's making me so horny and sensitive it's unbearable! If a big, hairy, horny monster wanted to lie on top of me and press all its weight on me, or better yet, press me between itself and its equally big and hairy and horny friend, pushing against all my sensitive spots and stretching me impossibly wide around them while they fill me up with load after load of sticky, satisfying cum, I'm sure it would fix me.

Need someone or something on top of me like a weighted blanket right about now.

[rapidhighway]

i soooo wish i could be so enthusiastic about bugs and love them and think they're cute, there is nothing fun in being deathly terrified of them but unfortunately i am deathly terrified of them

[hacksawboy]

hi tf2mblr im here to show u guys my medic oc

[quietwingsinthesky]

.

[immamapletreekid]

ok movie thoughts time

[orcelito]

8 pm beddy bye bc im so tired I'm nauseous got NO chores done today could just barely feed the cats. It's honestly rough in here. Running out of plates. I only have my giant plates left. Need to clean the litter boxes. But if I smell even 1 more stink I will hurl so I am in bed to rest up so that maybe tomorrow I will be less tired. We will hope!!!

[bunnihearted]

🍽️😔🎻

[yaoianime]

Soon im rly gonna do it

[zevrans]

.

[actual-corpse]

Trying to explain to someone why I, someone with a uterus, deserves basic human rights when all they focus on is pissing on the poor.

[nabaath-areng]

It's funny how my psychiatrist and psych nurses are all so supportive about my as of yet undiagnosed physical issues and do their best to keep those in mind when we discuss my care. Meanwhile GP and qualified doctors either tell me to "not compare my googling to their medical degree" or go all "yeah EDS sounds quite likely actually but there's no point diagnosing that since it cannot be cured anyway"

[mymelodyisme]

👉🏽👈🏽

[seedlessmuffins]

.

[gazeboarcade]

So like. I want more lgbt+ stories that have actors in them that Look Like People. I shan’t name any examples bc I can’t take the heat of whatever fans of the Medias there are that do this, but so many have these stunning, polished, fresh outta vogue actors in them. And sure, they can be insanely talented and put on a great show…

But like, isn’t anyone else tired of it? I don’t know any gay/trans people that look like that. It feels… inaccessible. It feels like looking at something that’s meant to be a story you should (by all logic) love because it’s! your! people!

And yet… it’s not. Those aren’t my people. My people look like people.

[snailune]

wiki how do I stop spiraling about my life once every 2 weeks I'm getting sick of it