#implied remisa

[rawrlight]

this has probably been talked about before but damnit i want to see more of the death note characters struggle.

i want to see light flinching at fireworks and his father's touch after the faked execution. i want to see him habitually turning to an empty chair, picking up a tennis racket, absentmindedly making tooth-rotting coffee before he realises L isn't there anymore.

i want to see misa installing multiple locks on her door after her parents' murders, making multiple trips at night just to check the doors are locked. after she gets married to light, i want her to complain to the empty air, to say a hasty goodnight before realising that no-one is there to listen any longer.

i want to see kid L staying up late alone, face lit by a computer screen. i want to see him before his death: i want to see his last moments with the man who raised him, his last night with the only one who understood him, him knowing that death's finally starting to catch up.

i want to see near trying to live up to the title of L. i want to see him staying up more at night, dropping sugar cubes in his tea even though he knows it's stupid.

i want to see mello digging his nails into his skin, chugging energy drinks, just to stay up and study for a little while longer. i want to see him doing anything to win and regretting it later on when he's alone. i want to see him keeping matt's goggles in his pocket after his death.

i want to see matt blaming himself after he sees mello spiral, maybe even blaming L and purposely scoring lower on his tests so he won't become the next L. i want to see matt choosing to follow mello out of the orphanage anyway and them having a big argument about it because mello didn't want matt to have to sacrifice everything he'd known for him.

i want to see kid sayu trying her best to live up to her brother's image, trying to be 'the smart one' because that's what light was and so she figures that's what she has to be, too.

i want to see sachiko, after her son's and husband's death, make a portion large enough for four, set a table for four and leave the door open every day at nine until she realises no-one is going to come home.

okay so i know that death note is an action-centered anime and having things like these would slow down the plot and maybe bore the readers. but i also think that all these show their humanity and also is part of the problem that light and L both show the readers: sometimes you get so caught up in the game, in the thrill of it all, that you forget the pawns you're playing with are not plastic pieces but real, living human beings.

[aaxzlyte]

2024 Fic Masterpost

A list of every one of my Death Note fanfiction works on AO3 in the year 2024.

【General warning going in to read the tags on ao3 and be mindful. Triggers and sensitive content is included in some of the below works.】

2024 events collections:

Death Note Kinktober Collection on ao3

Remisa {Misa/Rem}

satisfying pleasure

1.1k | F/F | E

Rem finds another reason to hate Light Yagami. And another way she is better than him, as well.

watch

1.6k | F/F | E

"Please," she whines. Her wrists twist away from each other, but remain flush due to the rope connecting them. Misa groans in frustration and partial embarrassment. She glances back up to the mirror in front of her and bites her lip. She really does look pretty, though.

break all the rules

<1k | F/F | M

Rem indulges in Misa's public exhibitionism.

my heart is rose-tinted (a dream world)

2.3k | F/F | E | ongoing

Rem visits her nearly every week. Since she turned eighteen, the succubus (that is what she claims to be —Misa sees her more as a Goddess) has been draining her for all she is worth. It is perhaps due to the manipulations of her mind and body —the way Rem always knows the right place to touch, how hard to press, how much pain to inflict to balance out the pleasure— that Misa has found herself unable to be truly upset about it all. Rem is perfect, really. It’s to be expected, considering her role. But Misa cannot help but feel attached to her, foolish as it is. Love makes you foolish; Rem says it all the time.

baby blue

<1k | F/F | G

Misa paints Rem's nails.

good boyfriend

<1k | F/F | M

Rem doesn’t technically have a gender, so does it matter if she lets Misa refer to her as a man for Misa’s own comfort?

Meronia {Mello/Near}

bloody mess

2.9k | F/F | E

Near is unfortunate enough to have a menstrual cycle, but Mello is there to take care of her.

only you and i

3.1k | M/M | E

It's, honestly, exactly what he'd wanted upon initiating this. Mello would take Near's virginity and no one else would get the chance to even look at him. Near wouldn't want anyone else to look at him, because Mello would finally be enough, in some aspect.

Abuse of Power

1.5k | F/M

Mello’s head is fucking killing him and it makes his mood worse. Not that it could actually get much worse than it is now. Being tied up in the brightest room known to man is pretty fucking annoying. “This isn’t legal,” he speaks up. His voice is hoarse and he has to swallow down the scratchiness in his throat before he can speak again. “It fucking can’t be.” The voice that answers is far smoother. And quieter, calmer. It makes a small little part of Mello feel more at ease to hear it (he snuffs out that part quickly). “You’ve never been one for following the rules. You are also a criminal, after all.”

F sharp

3.7k | F/M | T

[for femininity] Near keeps having weird, totally out-of-the-blue thoughts. Near has a hard time accepting that these thoughts may not be so weird or out-of-the-blue, but mostly can’t get comfortable with what they imply. or 4 times Near should’ve known she was trans, plus 1 time she finally figures it out.

close my eyes, you're here

<1k | M/M | M

This is the only time Near ever allows himself to cry, to mourn for Mello. The only time his thoughts fill with what could have been, what he really wanted.

Stuck in the Dryer...

1.6k | M/M | M

Mello deserves a trophy for dealing with this shit. Firstly for putting up with Near at all, let alone being charitable enough to allow Near to live with him (as if Near couldn't afford his own, nicer apartment on top of a caretaker). Secondly because Near trying to be seductive is like watching a teenager fumble with shitty pick up lines on their first date. And thirdly for not giving into Near's admittedly shitty, yet somehow alluring attempts at getting into Mello's pants. or Mello might be slightly delusional and too horny for his own good. Near gets stuck in a dryer.

Lawlight {Light/L}

tie the knot

3.4k | M/M | E

This isn't really what Light had in mind when L decided to chain them up together. Sure, it might have felt like some sort of fucked up marriage certificate that Light had no choice but to sign. A sort-of ‘death do we part’ kind of agreement. But Light was also well-aware (too fucking aware) of how ridiculous he sounded when he told himself that. ‘The old ball and chain’ was a stupid saying anyway. Light is kidding himself.

Focus

<1k | M/M | M

Light and L are watching porn and yet Light can’t seem to keep his eyes on the screen.

Bathroom Break

<1k | M/M

L uses Light's mouth.

monsters who suck blood (and monsters who always tell lies)

3.5k | 2/2 | M/M | E

Seeing Light bent over a body, scooping ludicrous amounts of blood into his mouth and missing almost entirely sent L reeling. His first thought was that he was right; Light Yagami was clearly a vampire.

Other {Misc. Ships & Gen}

Forgive Him Before He's Dead

<1k | Gen | T

Light bites back a frustrated huff. Of course, he's still just as predictable to L. The man even saw his own death coming. Although... he seemed genuine. Even in the face of saying words that should mock Light's need for a mask, L looks like he means it. And he seems disappointed that Light took the path he's supposed to in order to uphold his facade. Light wants to surprise L, for once. He wants to give him what he wants, what he thinks he can't get. or The rain scene goes slightly differently, yet it changes nothing.

Misa-Misa

<1k | Gen | M

Misa-Misa bleeds out next to her stalker and perpetrator in the alley of her porn industry building on the 12th of March at 21:13 in Tokyo, Japan.

can you stomach it

<1k | Gen / M/M | Implied Bloodmoon

Light’s lips part obediently to take B’s fingers into his mouth. He sucks and gags slightly at the taste. B knows, in time, he will no longer shiver as the blood runs down his esophagus.

MY HUSBAND IS A BOTTOM!

2.7k | F/M | E | Yagamane

Misa is not above breaking out of her ‘perfect, obedient wife’ shell if it means Light will finally pay attention to her.

Closed Game

1.7k | F/F | M | Kiyomisa

Kira is dead. The world doesn’t know that, of course. Not even the current owner of the notebook understands that the original Kira is long gone. Light was a stand-in. A temporary substitute until Misa finally assumed her role. That is what Kiyomi will tell Mikami —and Mikami will believe her. Light may have paved the way, experienced the original vision of a New World, but Misa will be the one to experience the fulfillment of that vision.

If there are any mistakes you noticed on this masterlist please DM me on Tumblr and let me know. It's much appreciated :)

⟨dividers by cafekitsune on tumblr⟩

[girlfailurefelix]

what gave you the idea for borrowed time? did you have any other plans for it? (aka yap about it all you want)

so actually! i had been thinking about it conceptually for like two weeks before i wrote any of it (i was complaining to my sib about it cuz i was embarrassed to write since i hadn’t since i was a preteen/young teen lol) and it just drove me absolutely nuts cuz i couldn’t stop thinking about it at work.

just gonna establish now since it gets confusing: greg ≠ gregory. i treat them as two different characters in the same body. so i will not use them interchangeably on this ask, just like i don’t in my fic

cut because i am going to YAP

i wrote chapter one as an attempt to stop myself from thinking about it further (i was originally going to kill tony off and have it be a oneshot, either post-pizzaplex escape much like security breach’s bad ending c̶u̶z̶ ̶s̶o̶u̶l̶m̶a̶t̶i̶s̶m̶ or have him end up getting chased to the fire escape and yk, you can fill in the blank on that one. blah blah blah insert something here about tony’s very interesting, incredibly weird intro in the book. i’m still trying to figure that one out cuz other themes in the book [the celtic stuff specifically. this is a huge thing for me and i can go off about how it’s used in the book, but that’s for another post if yall want that] make that interesting if we didn’t know how ggy kills from the therapist tapes. actually, even though you can’t see it, this is how he dies in my cotard’s solution animatic. the knife in it wasn’t for killing him lol, his ass went off the roof [hence “i wanna make my murder look like a suicide”], but now i’m getting sidetracked). but one thing led to another and i wrote chapter 6 and the epilogue.

Chapter 4 was my last written chapter (hence why i don’t bother uploading individual chapters and just drop whole stories at once) if you don’t count editing several parts of chapter 1 (small tweaks for clarity purposes, not huge minus what i mentioned above. debated making this one two chapters but ended up keeping them together as a big one cuz it didn’t make as much sense when split up) and chapter 5 (i originally wrote the car ride to the pizzaplex cuz i thought it would be funny to make tony flip a tit and go hellaciously slow with the fear that he’d get pulled over cuz yk. twelve. but i figured it was too boring and discarded it).

the original title was actually a different song name. (super embarrassing but it was a hollywood undead song -another way out. i might use this later for a different, more fitting fic- cuz it helped me come up with a lot of the smaller details within chapter 1)

i did name it after the song from the death note musical cuz it can be interpreted about being about both tony and gregory. i meant it about gregory personally cuz at the end he quite literally is living on borrowed time (since tony’s death is the reason he’s able to get away from vanny. very remisa.), but tony is too throughout the entire fic, since obviously it’s an extension of his original implied lifespan (you’re welcome, you little shit.) and also cuz he’s putting up with (and being worn down by) greg’s shit the entire time in order to save gregory, even at the risk of his own safety, and i think that lines up really well too.

the chapters also all had individual names but too many were deathnote so i got embarrassed (og title of chapter 4 was the game begins lol, which is why the last sentence of chapter 3 was what it was)

color was SOOOO important. like the names i used were incredibly specific. i really wanted to emphasize how dead greg’s eyes are vs gregory, also how tony was losing steam cuz yk. traumatizing.

i based tony’s mom on mine lol. and she and my sib picked up on that immediately after they both read it (i didn’t have a beta cuz i didn’t take criticism or editing, but i did let them read it immediately) i know she doesn’t check on tony in the book when he sneaks out, but i figured that’s her giving him space, and i loveeeee projecting so that was reflected in the mom parts. mother’s instinct and all that. she totally knew greg was weird after the first night, he wasn’t just bullshitting on that part, but again, space (and yet another projection from a specific experience of my own).

greg. let’s fucking talk about greg. FIRST, he was gonna kill tony’s ass the whole time, despite chapter 4’s events. that was him being manipulative because i just don’t think greg *wouldn’t* notice tony’s behavior. as i wrote, he’s NOT subtle, even in actual canon. he meant what he said when he called him useful, and he certainly didn’t like feeling rejected, but don’t let him fool you, he doesn’t actually like tony. tony actually mentions this in chapter 2 as a possibility and much like his instincts in the actual book, he was right. it was just about dragging it out to make it worse on tony and getting something out of him as a bonus. i like to think of him as building on gregory’s original personality cuz virus, so he’s not that different, but he’s like,, worse if that makes sense. like the worst parts of gregory, amplified. with some killing, yk.

speaking of tony guessing, he was absolutely BULLSHITTING with the greg vs gregory shit. denial is not just a river, he just happened to be right. cuz seriously, he was two seconds from cracking anyway, i mean little dude is SO traumatized, especially at this point.

so gregory. he was able to communicate when half asleep cuz i think that greg/the actual virus would want him to experience the nightmares and such (agony continuing to feed the virus. yk. fnaf shit) to keep him in line. so this is the small window of opportunity he would have to even be a person, much less attempt to save himself. he’s miserable in this state though cuz tired and unable to be fully awake lol. also he can see everything greg does, hence knowing tony and trusting him, but he can’t really do anything about it. he’s always present though.

ellis wasn’t in this besides mentions because of multiple reasons. 1, i wanted to make it clear how much greg was isolating him. like that’s on purpose. 2, it would’ve gotten too convoluted to have tony protecting both of them in this specific case. and 3, i knew i wanted it to loop to security breach, so ellis would’ve interfered with that unless i killed him off. regardless of the fact that i personally see him dying in addition to tony as the canon post-ggy events [cuz let’s be real, regardless of if he believed it, he read tony’s paper. that’s a loose end and a disaster for greg waiting to happen. i don’t think he would risk it, especially since tony’s immediate disappearance would be sus as fuck.], i didn’t feel like killing him off needlessly.

so i actually sobbed after re-reading the end. giggled and kicked my feet about how awful it would be while writing it, but rest assured, it kicked my ass after. like to the point that i considered scrapping it and letting them get out safe (which is where the AU with Sunlight on Your Skin came in), but i knew this was the proper ending for both of them. greg ended up getting his way in the most fucked up way (tony was useful.) but also failing in the same breath, tony got to save gregory (giving him a far more satisfying character arc than his original, meaningless death. also fulfilling the void left by the guilt from not being able to help his dad’s fate), and gregory got saved, even if it was a hollow, tragic “victory” for him.

also i originally was going to have greg fatally wound tony as he won the game, but i wanted to bring in vanny (cuz of the “friends” comment from the beginning and it being brought up again by greg in one of the middle chapters) cuz A) i love my wife and B) it felt /too/ sad and angsty to the point of overkill (no pun intended)

oh. and gregory does actually like tony back, he wasn’t just saying it cuz wanting to escape and then him dying. just so we’re all aware. maybe not at that point as much as tony does (and not as much as he does in sunlight on your skin’s au continuation, cuz actually actively getting to be himself would help.), but it would’ve worked out if tony didn’t yk, kick the bucket. sorry if that makes his death worse.

[loving-parasite]

i will forever hate l/wl/ght idgaf . i swear to god theres so many way better and more in character ships (VAGUELY GESTURING TO REMISA . WHICH IS BASICALLY HEAVILY IMPLIED TO BE CANON/SUBTEXT) but we had to shove the blandest yaoi in there huh

[skyborneveggie]

hmm, for the writing ask game maybe 🤔 🫘 💖 ? :>

🙏🙏🙏💜💜💜

🤔 Are there any new characters you want to write about?

YES, I REALLY REALLY want to write some introspective Misa fic. Mostly focusing on her trauma & melancholy emptiness, but with hints of implied remisa & internalized comphet in the background. No concrete ideas yet, but thoughts are brewing~

🫘 Spill the beans. What's a new project you're doing this year?

Hanahaki Light!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am determined to make this fic happen, even if it takes the whole year. I've finished plotting Light's emotional journey & know how it's going to end, so now it's just a matter of figuring out how everything fits in with the events of part 2 of DN. Also currently at the stage where I'm trying to stop the ideas from ballooning any more than they already have... I've learned my limit the hard way, & if it gets any bigger than this I know I'm going to get burnt out or lose my drive, and then the fic will never see the light of day. Crossing my fingers that that doesn't happen 🤞.

💖 What is your primary writing goal for this year?

My primary writing goal every year is to write 2 original short stories that I am proud enough of to try to submit for publishing, and to write at least 1 fanfic. In the past the main critique I have received has been "rich prose & characters, but not enough plot to justify them". Which is honestly totally true... for both my original work AND fan work. I am fully aware that I have been trying to get away with being a tone-piece-only girlie 😅. So I think this year, I will adjust my goal to 2 original short stories WITH PLOT, and 1 fanfic WITH PLOT.

[mikami]

I like your Mikalight thoughts, even if i don't ship it. But you were speaking of scenarios where their relationship would be healthy, and i just find that thought interesting.

Do you think any romantic relationships in the DN which include main characters (Misa, L, Light) could be healthy? I mean, even canonically implied romantic relationships like Misa/Rem or Misa/Light are either one-sided or doomed to tragedy (bc Remisa can't be together). And any other relationship you can imagine would be toxic and imbalanced. Misa is obsessed with Light and it isn't reciprocated so she can't be with anyone else. L just would be bored with anyone (except maybe Light but it still would be toxic bc they are enemies?). And Light just seems not that interested in relationships in general, he is in love with justice lol + as you pointed out he would probably see romantic relationship as another tool to achieve his goals.

The point is, i think any relationship where one of the participant is L or Misa or Light would be toxic, your thoughts?

(I mean, Remisa is absolutely one-sided also, Misa tells Rem how much she wants her dead pretty regularly in canon....)

But to the point... I think any relationship involving these people would be HARD, but I would write none of them off as being incapable of having healthy relationships, you know? It’s a matter of finding a compatible partner and putting in the work necessary. 

Misa is the one I have the most difficulty seeing this with right of the bat because so many of her issues are directly related to idealizing romantic relationships while dehumanizing her partner. Misa’s a person who would need someone who loves her enough to set firm boundaries and help her find herself outside of the relationship also, but those are... not things she is inclined to want to do. 

I think Misa would have a better time having a platonic friend who helps her through first and seeing a romantic relationship second, but like, she could pull it off. It would just take time and work.

For L it’s like... I think of it as basically a matter of finding a partner who is interesting to him, interested in him and self-reliant so they don’t have a ton of emotional needs. Basically, a person who is kind of like him. This would still require work of course, every interpersonal relationship does, but as long as L is in a relationship in which the person doesn’t expect him to change fundamentally to be more of a traditional partner, they’ll be fine.

And Light... is honestly the easiest one for me to picture, haha. It’s true that he’s not inherently interested in a relationship at all, but that doesn’t mean he’s incapable. Like, it would be TOUGH on him to accept that his partner is a real person who needs him to be somewhat vulnerable in turn, but he could do it over time. 

Though I mean.. you’re right that the chances of either of them having that healthy relationship are SLIM, I just would not call them zero.

Maybe this is all more revealing of my personal perspective on healthy relationships though - I think even in a good relationship, it will be difficult and you will hurt each other and discover edges to yourself that you didn’t even know existed. What makes the relationship healthy is the willingness to talk it out, be understanding, and change for the better over time.