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yazzydream · 1 year

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Speculating What the 16-Registered Special Grade Curses Are

Geto mentions that there are 16-Registered Special Grade Curses, but we only ever got to see four! In all of Jujutsu Kaisen!! I want to know what they are at least, so here's a few speculations.

First, the ones we know.

Tamamo-no-Mae Incarnate, an Imaginary Vengeful Spirit based off of Tamamo-no-Mae.

Ah, a quick explanation of Imaginary Vengeful Sprits: They're Curses built off the cumulative fear humans share over a specific figure, like a famous yokai or ghost story. Kuchisake-onna is one... But so is Sukuna. Ryomen Sukuna is the "Imaginary Demon" with two faces and four arms, but he was actually a human who existed. So, I guess this means he was changed due to people's fears of him? This kind of makes sense when you consider that the Three Great Families are also decedents of the Three Great Vengeful Spirits. I mean... those are Curses too. Actually, we can probably count all of them as among the 16-Registered Special Grades now that I think about it.

Wow, what a fruitful tangent. Let's get back to it, shall we?

1. The legend of Tamamo-no-Mae is that she was a fox spirit under the guise of a courtesan under Emperor Konoe (who reigned from 1142-1155, Heian period). The same beautiful fox spirit who led to numerous rulers getting seduced into being terrible rulers throughout history. Because of course she was.

2. The Smallpox hag is a Disease Curse. Kenjaku lied about it being a deity, (src: Vol. 20 extra) but I assume it's still a Special Grade since it can use Domain Expansion. Disease Curses are born from the fear of a disease such as the plague. The way Akutami depicts something on it's stomach like it's distended is notable. I did find Sopona, the god of smallpox in the Yoruba religion, which might've been used as a reference point.

3. Kurourushi was a Registered Special Grade from Kenjaku's (I suppose Geto's?) collection of Curse Spirits he released for the Culling Game. A cockroach curse... At this point, I think it's safe to call it a Devil from Chainsaw Man.

I actually suffered through researching cockroaches a little for this list to see if anything caught my eye. It wasn't worth it. lol. There is a neat article about cockroaches in pop culture you can read to your heart's content if you like. Obviously, swarms of cockroaches attacking people are a common enough trope. Honestly, I'm also reminded of the beetles from The Mummy, only more disgusting.

It's definitely totally irrelevant, but Metamorphosis by Franz Kafka, which is listed on that page, is about a man who turned into a giant beetle-like creature (usually thought to be a roach). I only bring it up because Mahito briefly discusses it in the first light novel.

4. An Asian God Curse not from Japan. Maybe Genesha, but more probably Kangetian, the Japanese equivalent. Kangetian has both positive and negative reception in Japan and has some Curse-like descriptions. Whereas Genesha seems like a benevolent figure... But Genesha is the one consistently depicted as pink with four arms... Y'know what, Curses are an amalgamation of human negativity anyway, I shouldn't stress about it.

From the Kangetian wiki article:

the Buddhist Vinayaka was (at least at first) negatively portrayed as the creator of obstacles and the leader of a class of malignant demons who obstructed Buddhist practice called vinayakas [...]

And there's this:

On the other hand, he is considered to be still bound by base passions and desires (kleshas) and thus is sometimes also regarded as a rather volatile, demanding god who is quick to punish those who have offended him.

The ones that are most likely part of the registered Curses.

The Three Great Vengeful Spirits, ancestors of the Three Great Families. There's no way they're actually around anymore, but this is just about being a "registered" Special Grade, so they had to have counted, right?

I'll try to be brief here, because somehow, this post has already ended up three times longer than I'd intended. (*edit: It did not end up brief.)

5. Sugawara no Michizane came from a middle-class family of scholars. He was considered a child prodigy, a genius, and held the second highest rank in the imperial court, right under the emperor. As you can imagine, he was the target of jealousy from other aristocrats. He was falsely accused of trying to abolish the emperor and died two years later in exile. (His greatest rivals were the Fujiwara btw, which is ironic considering what Uro thought Yuta was.)

After he died, everyone thought his enemies would continue to dominate the court. AND YET, a whole lot of them started to up and die from "accidents," illnesses, etc. ALSO, lightning repeatedly struck the imperial court and even more of his enemies died. The imperial city experienced weeks of rainstorms and floods. Anyway, everyone decided they needed to pacify what was clearly Michizane's vengeful spirit, built him a temple, and deified him as Tenjin. (Like "Raijin," god of thunder. Lol.)

6. Taira no Masakado was a samurai who's notable for leading the first recorded rebellion against the imperial court in Kyoto. Masakado worked for a powerful noble in the capital but returned to the east after his father's death. He ended up as a kind of "hero of the people" and declared himself the "new emperor" with half of Japan's land. Which, uh, obviously wouldn't fly with the imperial court. He died two months later in battle and his head was sent to Kyoto and displayed for the people to see.

But there were some strange rumors about that head... Its eyes stayed opened for months... You could hear it grinding its teeth at night... Most bizarrely, legend says the head flew back east to look for its body. Specifically, to the head mound in what would become one of the most expensive pieces of land in Tokyo's financial district.

Anyone who tries taking down the mound is faced with bad luck (including death), so it's well maintained to this day.

7. Emperor Sutoku was a puppet emperor from the age of 3 to 22; under the control of his father. After he was forced to abdicate, failed a rebellion, and forced into exile, he became a monk. Devoting himself to Buddhism, he copied scriptures and asked the court to have them sent to a temple in Kyoto, but the court sent them back claiming they were cursed. (Yeah, I know.)

Sutoku swore to become a yokai to avenge his grudge. After that, he never cut his hair or nails again. By the time he died, he looked like a demon.

Everything from the subsequent fall in fortune of the Imperial court, the rise of the samurai powers, droughts and internal unrests were blamed on his haunting.

(I found this neat series of articles about each of the Three Vengeful Spirits after typing this out, which go into them a little more: Taira no Masakado, Emperor Sutoko, Sugawara no Michizane)

8. Ryomen Sukuna needs no introduction. I will add this quote, though.

Q: It's mentioned that Sukuna was a human who actually existed, but was he a curse user when he was alive? Akutami: You could say he was a curse user, but I think he was closer to a natural disaster.

9. Rika-chan was definitely a Special Grade. And once she was discovered, she had to have been registered as the "Queen of Curses." The question is whether Geto counted her among the 16?

Tangentially, these are my own thoughts, but human Rika... Well, reading her character profile from Volume 0 and seeing her looks-- her long dark hair, the mole on her face-- reminds me of another certain malevolent curse-like girl: The eponymous Tomie from Tomie by Junji Ito. And considering we get an Uzumaki reference later in Volume 0, I don't think it's entirely a coincidence.

That's 9 out of the 16, so actually, we knew more of the Registered Special Curses then I thought. (Speculative though it may be?)

Finally, onto the reason I made this post in the first place.

☆ Because I was one of those children that ate up supernatural mysteries and fairytales, I really liked the legend of Yuki-onna. Something about the imagery... A beautiful woman in the mountain snow leading men to their deaths... Is super poetic. Lol.

☆ Sadako from Ring. She's so ubiquitous by this point, how could there not be an Imaginary Cursed Spirit based off her? The first Ring movie came out in 2001, and before that it was a novel series. Quick summary, this should be familiar to you: Sadako is a ghost who made a cursed video tape. Whoever watches the tape will die in seven days.

Notably, Sadako is a mix of two ghosts, Oiwa and Okiku. There's also Kayako from The Grudge. I can see all of them mixing together into a Special Grade.

☆ Since Mahito mentioned the nine-tailed fox (kyuubi), it would feel remiss not to mention it. Different from Tamamo-no-Mae, this one takes the more animalistic form.

☆ Genuinely terrifying would be an atomic bomb Curse. It would look balding and gaunt... It would have radiation related powers. It would be awful.

☆ I know the Darkness Devil is a thing in Chainsaw, but considering "the dark" is one of the most fundamental fears of the human race, I'm going to say that makes sense.

☆ A "white devil"/gaijin Edo period era Curse that stems from Japan's xenophobia, especially at the time. I imagine a lot of like, Christian imagery with it. Think Eva. Lol.

A few more...

Not even Kuchisake-onna was a Special Grade... It could do Simple Domain though, so it was probably a Grade 1 Curse at least. Here are a few more ideas that could be, at least, Grade 1 in my book.

★ Kisaragi Station is just my love for that urban legend. Hey, if oceans, forests, and volcanoes can become Curses, then so can imaginary train stations! Trains are also the way so much of travel is done in Japan, I legit think this could be a possible Curse. Kisaragi Station originated from a 2ch post in 2004. A woman asks 2ch for advice when the train she usually takes home doesn't stop... until it reaches "Kisaragi Station," anyway. There was a Mob Psycho OVA with a similar idea, where Reigan was basically trapped in a Domain, now that I think of it. Hahaha.

★ Hanako-san of the Toilet was also mentioned by Mahito. And frankly, not just in Japan, but around the world, the bathroom is a place of hauntings. Here's a really great video that talks about the fear of bathrooms in media that I recommend. And here's a post I wrote a few years ago about an episode of Shin-chan that made me apprehensive of dark bathrooms as a child. Lol.

Ideas for Curses from other countries

Like Kangetian, here are a few foreign figures too. I tried to keep in mind they should be of things people felt genuine fear or hatred towards. Obviously, each culture has a great many folklore and urban legends, so I'm only listing famous ones I personally knew of.

Jack the Ripper was a real-life English serial killer, but he's risen up into something of a mythical status. There are so many fictitious takes on him, in the world of Jujutsu Kaisen I'd be shocked if he hadn't become an Imaginary Cursed Spirit.

Baba Yaga, a Slavic cannibalistic witchy figure whose preference was children. Though this story is German, think the witch from "Hansel and Gretel." There were a lot of time periods of famine in that region of the world, so I can see starvation, the desperation to eat something, leading to that widespread grotesque fear.

Bloody Mary, I think of her as American, but there's rumors that she's based off of a European woman. I'm reading the wikipedia article right now, and boy is the ritual a lot more complicated and meaningful than it actually is. Basically, you just say "Bloody Mary, Bloody Mary, Bloody Mary"; repeating her name three times, in front of a bathroom mirror and she appears. Uh, I don't think there was a reason for it. It was just spooky thing to do. Speaking of reasons to be scared of dark bathrooms... I remember trying to call out to Bloody Mary as a child at a friend's house. I cannot for the life of me remember if I chickened out or not. Probably.

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La Llorona, "the Weeping Woman," of Mexican origin. She haunts areas around bodies of water looking for her children, who she drowned in life during a jealous rage when she discovered her husband cheating on her... Another female phantasm. I suppose, women are so often wronged in life, it's easy to imagine them haunting us after death. As a Curse, I can see her springing up mostly due to the guilty feelings of men who have cheated.

Why did I do this to myself? As soon as I started writing up Tamamo-no-Mae I went on a tangent (as you can see) and I spiraled. OTL Whatever, I like myths and lore and it was fun even if this ended up... so much longer than I'd expected.

#jujutsu kaisen #my jjk #jjkdaily #jjk meta #jjk manga #jjk spoilers #let's try to be more bloggy shall we #long post #jfc

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go-to-the-mirror · 2 years

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I really wanted to draw for this episode, but my head's been kind of messed up lately, so I'm just gonna ramble I guess. I've been so excited for this episode :3

Firstly, this is one of my absolute favourite episodes ever, and I Will Not shut up about it, because it's so good! Literal suburban hellscape!! To be honest I relate a little more to the other themes in this episode, being quiet fear, no one knowing or caring that you died in some supernatural suburban hell, and your body is just rotting there. An irrelevant name, an irrelevant face, just another victim of this place. Spooky stuff! Not too afraid of suburbs themselves lol, though I doubt many are.

This episode is SO neat! :D Right, on with the ramble/analysis because I have GREAT words for this episode.

@a-mag-a-day

Content warnings for everything in this episode + some themes of domestic violence/abuse.

Before we go ahead with the episode, here are some highlights from text conversations.

WHEN YOU CANT TRUST COMFORT!! (MAG 162, MAG 170, MAG 181, MAG 186, MAG 187 (to an extent)) MAG 150 (I love Cul-de-Sac and will never shut up about it) MAG 188 but when Jon' talking about how The Lonely is familiar to Martin and how the suburbia domains have quiet suffering (Will never be over that actually i have So Many Feelings) MAG 32 I can make a little quote thig one second actually because I have Thoughts god i'd be so cool on tumblr but i'm too anxious to post there, this is a tragedy [...] "I was going to die. I knew that now, just as she had, just as anyone else who came here had. How many corpses lay waiting behind the placid façade of this endless false suburbia?" Screaming Every time I think about cul-de-sac it becomes even more my favourite statement

(Messages to Mapleejay, 22 December, 2022)

One day I am going to write a statement and it's going to be like eye, lonely, idk, but it's definitely going to be eye and lonely and it's going to be so horrifying because combination false comfort + THAT being desperate for help people watching and laughing and judging but passing by + that line from cul-de-sac I'm obsessed with [...] Being lonely isn't just about being alone physically Being alone in an uncaring crowd [...] No one knows or cares what you're dealing with The line from cul-de-sac is "Her face was bloody but I was sure I didn't recognize her. She had a bag with her, and her ID read "Yetunde Uthman," not a name I'd ever encountered before. Just another victim of this place" but also "How many corpses lay waiting behind the placid facade of this endless false suburbia?" And "I checked to see if I could find anything out about Yetunde Uthman, and I did find a few old social media profiles, but I wasn't able to get through to any family or friends. As far as I can tell she disappeared a year ago and nobody noticed."

(Messages to Mapleejay, 29 December, 2022)

Now, onto the actual reaction, posting it on tumblr dot com because I am no longer too anxious! Hell, I might even post the previously mentioned compilation of quotes with commentary! Fun times.

You’re all alone, trying to connect with people, trying to find your place in the world, but in the end the only person you really know is yourself, and even then, not all that well. There’s plenty of things I’ve done I couldn’t explain to you.

Shout out to that time my sister tried to convince me that she knew me better than I knew myself. Not in a malicious way, mind, we were kids, and she just figured that because she could remember more of my life, she knows me more.

Yeah, I mean, I guess it's for everyone I guess, but here I am with my impulsivity and memory issues having no idea why the hell I did so many of the stupid things I've done. You whole life is just justifying to yourself the decisions you've made, so maybe I'm just not grand at that /hj.

“What an idiot! How the hell could he have done such an obviously stupid thing? How was I surprised it went so badly? What a relief I’m now so much older and wiser.” Except that last part never really turns out to be true, does it? The line of when you were your dumb younger self seems to keep moving forward with you, until each more mature and reasonable version of you eventually falls foul of it and becomes a young idiot.

A year ago, I thought I had really worked on my anger and just become an all-round nicer person to be around, and then I look back and realize that yes, my anger was still very much there, and also that I was quite... passionate? I am still, I'm pretty loud, it comes with the territory, and that can be misinterpreted as or become anger, given the right (or wrong) circumstances.

It's not really worth it, is it. I can berate myself from 4 years ago for being an angry, clingy little prick, but there's not really a point anymore. I understand them, I understand why fae was angry and clingy and sort of mean, and now I know how to not be angry and clingy and mean, and being angry at your younger self really doesn't accomplish anything. This is @ jon sims, pull yourself together man.

The thing is, when we both found ourselves in positions to be working from home, we actually thought it was going to be really good for our relationship. The two of us, spending all our time together; we reckoned it was going to be real romantic. We were real stupid back then.

If I know anything from the statistics of domestic violence in the pandemic, then yeah no. No. Not that their relationship was abusive or anything.

Also, I like how Herman goes from saying how believing you're much older and wiser is a lie, to saying that they were really stupid "back then," there's something in that. I don't know what.

Hell, technically it’s not even a suburb. It’s just a village that looks so much like a suburb that you could pull it up drop it on the edge of any dull town in England and it would look the same.

Can't believe the suburban hellscape episode isn't even set in a suburb.

Just street after street of identical, blandly pleasant houses, all winding around each other in dead ends and cul-de-sacs and one-way streets, making sure every house has plenty of inoffensive garden. I’ve never seen people happily living in a place so obviously dead.

CAN I QUICKLY TALK ABOUT GRASS?

Grass, the short lawn grass, it's not great. It is bad for the environment actually. Suburbs slash neg.

Just that last bit of that paragraph. Real.

I’d say that cheating on him was a foolish act of past me, but honestly, it’s one of the few decisions I’ve ever made that I completely understand. I didn’t even try to hide it, not really, and when he found out and it all ended, I kind of hated myself for just how relieved I was that I’d finally be able to leave that place, to get in my car and drive away from that gentle suburban nightmare.

I like that phrase, "gentle suburban nightmare."

I got a cheap apartment in Liverpool and tried to tell myself I was happier. The single life, footloose and … sitting at home binging bad TV. I tried to get back into the club scene, but honestly, I think I’m just too old now. The music was too loud, the drinks were too expensive and the sort of thing I used to take to be dancing all night now hit me with a comedown so hard that I had to write off almost the entire week.

As mentioned above, I don't really think The One Alone is only about physical isolation. It can be, sure, but I feel like it's also about the failure to connect. There are so many people and none of them see you, and you don't see them, and there's an insurmountable difference between you and them.

It didn’t help that, over the course of a ten-year relationship, “my friends” had become “our friends” and there weren’t any of them siding with me in this situation. Some would drop platitudes about maybe reconnecting after the fallout was done with, but I know when I’m being handled by people who “don’t want to create any more drama.”

✨ loosing all of your friends at once ✨

Ah... good times, good times.

It's like, not only have you lost one person, then you lose everyone, and if you had anyone left you just sort of... assume you don't. It's so easy to cut yourself off, and when you've done it once you can do it again, and again, and again, and again.

I don’t know. I was younger, then. Foolish.

There is something there!

Then Jon does a litte laugh, assuming in statement character, so I'm guessing the statement giver was laughing at himself. Neat detail.

It was late when I got to what I thought was his street, driving through the one-way signs and well-maintained gardens that bordered that snaking road. The sun had disappeared, but the sky was still fairly light, that late-summer twilight that seems to just drag on forever.

Mate, I love the aesthetic of the fog and The Lonely, but that's not really what feels lonely to me. This feels lonely, slightly humid, sun shining into your eyes, slight breeze, no one around, flat and empty.

Yes, I know I'm just describing an Ontario summer.

There was no answer at any of them. There were no lights on behind the drawn curtains, and all the house numbers were zero.

It's so freaky! The growing dread, you know this could almost be an I Do Not Know You statement, what with the things playing at being normal houses, and the tv show shown later.

I wished I hadn’t thrown away the wristwatch Alberto had given me, but it was too late for those regrets.

I may be reaching, but could this be a microcosm of Herman's regret at having thrown away him and Alberto's relationship, and seeing it as too late to salvage it. Now he's left with no way to tell the time, as it were, in a manifestation of The Lonely.

At the start, I was counting how many houses I passed, but when I got to a hundred, I stopped. It was beginning to eat away at my careful rationalisations, and I couldn’t allow that.

I'm just highlighting it because I find it interesting how his mind works. Not in a bad way or even a good way. It just is.

I marched up to a nearby front door, prepared to kick in the flimsy-looking wood, but trying the handle revealed it was unlocked. I don’t know why I picked that house. It was exactly identical to all the others, and I’ve often wondered if there was anything that drew me to it. Perhaps I was just unlucky, or perhaps there only ever was one house.

I just really like this section. "Perhaps there only ever was one house," should be up there with "the blanket never did anything," as creepy lines. The theme of inevitability. This is going to happen, there is only one possible way this can end.

It feels tired, that's the lonely to me. Just being tired. You can cry all you want, you can be afraid but... at the end you're just tired and alone and it hasn't changed a thing. Inevitability in that way.

Or maybe, inevitability that you were always going to be alone. Maybe there's just something wrong with you.

Hhhh I love this episode so so so so so much.

The lights worked, which was a relief, and the inside looked exactly how I expected it to. And I mean, exactly how I expected it to: from the blank IKEA furniture, to the subtly-patterned cream wallpaper, to the picture frames lining the wall containing what were clearly stock photos, each of a different family pantomiming a scene of domestic bliss.

Firstly, the line "pantomiming a scene of domestic bliss" is just so... I love it so much. I love this episode so much. A family home, a happy family home from the outside looking in.

Secondly:

I did find several pictures of her and her new boyfriend though, which puts my mind somewhat at ease. Well, mostly. There’s something about him that doesn’t seem quite right. Something about the smile, maybe? I mean, they’re all pictures of Sasha and Tom, as I’m told his name is, having fun together, but… it’s hard to put into words exactly, but every one of them looks somehow like a stock photo.

(MAG 57 - Personal Space)

I could point to this and say that this is an example of it potentially being The Stranger, however I'm going to use it to point out something else.

You’re thinking too literally. Examining the physical categorisation, but ignoring the meaning of the thing. What are the bones? In the Distortion, your “Michael”, the structure of a skeleton, an established reality in your mind, is twisted and warped into an impossible form. But in other cases? Are they a symbol of slaughter and butchery? Are they the familiar made wrong? Or are they simply part of the messy, physicality of flesh?

(MAG 80 - The Librarian)

What matters is what it is, in this case the stock photos, what matters is what it means, what it makes the person looking at it feel. In Tom and Not!Sasha's case, it's representing how Not!Sasha is pantomiming as a real person, everything looks like a stock photo because she isn't actually a person going on dates with her boyfriend, she's pretending to be.

The stock photos in this episode are representing the pretense of this home where atrocities are committed being a normal family home. It's set up like a little suburban home, beige walls, sofa tv, family pictures, lovely place to raze a child - sorry raise a child - just so long as you ignore the blood dripping down from upstairs!

She was talking, or at least, it sounded like she was. The cadence and the sounds were so much like English that it took me almost a full minute to realise that she wasn’t actually saying words.

I recently relistened to episode 48 - Lost in the Crowd, and it's reminded me just how much I like the little bits of it focused on language. Easy to feel alienated when you don't know what people are saying.

The Lonely and The Stranger are pretty similar - one could say that they're part of the same thing and separating them with no room for nuance was a stupid thing fictionalized Robert Smirke - but yeah I mean, it's pretty easy to feel lonely in a crowd of people you don't know. The Lukas', the crowd, these people on the TV, they're all strangers, people you don't know who you feel scared of.

It's interpretation, really.

I hit the remote again. A shopping channel. The host was a tall, clean-shaven man with close-cropped hair. He was holding a brick and talking about it in that same flow of non-words, that still had a familiar salesman’s patter. The screen scrolled the message “buy now!”, though there was neither price nor contact details, as this man, who wouldn’t look at the camera, earnestly pretended to sell me a brick.

Firstly, Spamton G. Spamton is that you? Secondly, this is so freaky, I like it a lot. Just someone really trying to sell you a brick in complete gibberish, that's just so cool! Jonny just blew it out of the water with this one (it's my favourite non-metaplot episode).

I didn’t know them, as it turned out.

OOOOH JUST! HM! Just another person, dead upstairs, unknown even in death, not missed, alone even in death.

"I didn't know them."

She had a bag with her, and her ID read ‘Yetunde Uthman’ – not a name I’d ever encountered before. Just another victim of this place.

The line "just another victim of this place" is making me so unbelievably bouncing at the walls, tearing and ripping. Just another person, one of a million, just happened to be here, just another victim of this place.

I... don't know how to describe what I'm thinking when I hear that line. Just another victim of this place, just another poor unfortunate soul (in pain, in need) who somehow stumbled upon this suburban hellscape and died for it. Just another person with no one who would miss them, no one who'd notice they were gone. Just another lonely person, one of millions.

I am so abnormal about that line.

It looked as though she had forced her head through the mirror on the dressing table, the shards cutting her face and neck to ribbons, a particularly large piece piercing her jugular, spilling blood all down the unremarkable white table and onto the light brown carpet below. I don’t think she’d been dead that long, but I’m not a doctor and I didn’t really try to check.

I like how it's noted that their blood was spilled onto another piece of set dressing for this ordinary suburban household. "Spilling blood all down the unremarkable white table and onto the light brown carpet below." Noting the how the table is "unremarkable"... I just think that's neat, you know? How her blood has shattered the illusion of a normal home, a normal family posing in the picture frames.

How many corpses lay waiting behind the placid façade of this endless false suburbia?

Quiet terror. Private terror - you can't let anyone know. Put up a united front, and let things fall apart at home. Houses so put together in the front exactly like the others, but when you get inside there is the unmistakable sent of rot.

I need to write something with this, good lord.

Also, this reminds me of a line in 188.

ARCHIVIST But if you think there’s a lack of violence or suffering, then I’m afraid you’re mistaken. There’s plenty, it’s just… hidden. Trapped behind identical doors and down silent streets of unknown neighbours. The suffering here is deep. And it’s private.

(MAG 188 - Centre of Attention)

I say this as if I did not already think this already. I was not just reminded, I think about this podded cast quite a bit.

He was calling me; I don’t know how. But the tears came even faster now, as I answered, sobbing with relief to hear him yelling at me for taking so long. Had I forgotten? Was I even planning to bother? I tried to reply, to explain, but all I could manage to say, to get through the shaking sobs, was, “I love you.”

That's just a really beautiful moment, you think you're going to die and then you remember you love someone, and then someone comes to help you, because people love each other.

It's just... I really love that the way to beat The Lonely is love. Being loved, loving, not necessarily romantically, but human connection, love from person to person, in families, romantic partners, strangers, friends.

I think it's really great, I think this moment is really great, and I know Gerry says there are no entities of hope or love but I don't think we need them, 'cause we love enough on our own.

We’re working on it, the two of us. We’re not exactly back together yet, but I think it’s going well.

Yay! Fuck yeah! They're okay, or they're getting there, and you know what, great for them, great for them. Goddamn horror podcast with hope? And love? Hhhhh /pos.

As far as I can tell, she disappeared a year ago. And nobody noticed.

I've said this before in this, and I'll say it again. That really gets to me. Just being alone there, having no one even look for you, notice that you're gone, even care.

It's... horrible.

It’s not that easy though. When everyone has so many walls, so many defences, sometimes you can feel lonely even when you’re all in the same room. But it’s better than the alternative, and at least none of us are suffering alone.

That must be so awkward, like they all have so much baggage with each other, what do they do? Play scrabble? Jenga? They can't play cards 'cause Jon would accidentally cheat - or they'd accuse Jon of accidentally cheating - which sucks, because Sevens is fun. I learned Sevens from some guy in a pub in Ireland. It was fun.

MELANIE Jon, have you got a moment? ARCHIVIST Uh, course, I was just, um, having a statement. MELANIE Oh … A-an old one? ARCHIVIST Wha— Yes, an old one! I’m not— I’m doing my best. MELANIE Sure. ARCHIVIST What do you want?

My first reaction was "there was no reason for it to get so antagonistic in five seconds, Melanie" but then I reconsidered, and I understand why Melanie would say that, but why did she though? Like, what was the reason? He's in his office? The statement's right in front of him? Why? Like, fine, whatever, I get it, I can be nice and nuanced or whatever, but sometimes I don't want to and I want to get a bit miffed at Melanie for making it an angry conversation when it didn't have to be.

MELANIE Look, I’m not going to do my job anymore. ARCHIVIST I’m not sure I follow. You know we can’t quit. We’ve all tried. MELANIE I didn’t say I was going to quit. I said I’m not going to do my job: no researching, no filing, no field trips, nothing that is going to help the Institute in any way. I’ll still be around, I just … I can’t be a part of this anymore. If I get sick, I get sick, and if I die …

I get why they were still doing their jobs, out of the fear of getting sick or dying from it.

MELANIE Because this place is evil, Jon. And so, doing this job, helping it out, even in small ways, is in some ways evil tool. Every time we try to use it to do good, it just seems to make everything worse. And … And I will not be a part of that anymore. ARCHIVIST What about the Unknowing? W-we saved the world. MELANIE Did we? I-I mean, I think it was the right thing to do, but how many people were killed to do it? W-we weren’t even a neutral party. We did it as agents of The Eye, because Elias told us to.

Yeah! Yeah it is evil! Good on Melanie, honestly, for Jon it's... less of an option, but I'm glad Melanie's doing it. Also why is she nearly spot on-

MELANIE Martin put him there. A-and he’s still doing harm! You ever think that maybe this whole ritual business is just an excuse, and that we’re all just part of some huge, miserable fear machine?

So, what if I told you-

I mean, she's not wrong. She is not wrong.

Does this count as striking? Is she striking from her evil eye job?

MELANIE Right, right, okay. I know. That is why I ruined my first four sessions and almost torpedoed the chance at a genuinely really good therapist, because I was so paranoid that she was going to turn out to be some … some thing trying to manipulate me. But no. She’s not full of spiders, or made of wax, or wearing the therapist’s skin or whatever. She’s just a well-trained professional, who I am paying to help me.

Look hm I'm just, I'm cheerleading. Go Melanie! (woo) Idk what to say. Don't really care about this post statement.

MELANIE Look, I didn’t come here for a fight. I just wanted to let you know what was going on. If you need me, I’ll be trying to get Daisy drunk.

Hey, I mean. High stress situation, they're bound to be a bit snappy. And by them I do mean both of them, whatever, my blorbo isn't infallible or something.

I don't really care about the post statement.

In conclusion, I love this statement so much. I think it's really cool, I like the themes of quiet and private terror, and love saving people. Cul-de-Sac my absolute beloved, I started this at ~4pm, it is now ~8:30pm.

#the magnus archives #tma #a mag a day #mag 150 #the lonely #tma meta #landscaping-your-mind-chapter-one

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jorrated · 2 years

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Now I'm curious, what's your interpretation of Yume Nikki? /gen

OOHH!!!! Putting my extensive and extremely personal thoughts under a cut, cause it's going to be a long one

(like. fr. it's around 3.8k words long. click read more at your own risk.. plus spoiler warning + suicide discussion + mental health in general + some real artsy fartsy stuff)

1. DREAM ANALYSIS BULLSHIT THEORY

Just a little pre-ramble before my actual interpretation of the game, I wanna talk a little bit about dreams! I said on a previous post that it's almost impossible to decipher dreams from an outsider perspective, as not only people have their own symbology but dreams sometimes don’t even mean anything. However, that doesn’t mean you can’t instrumentalize dreams as something useful.

(Honestly you don’t have to read this part, I just wanted to rant about my views on psychoanalysis, since its a pseudoscience n all but I think its neat! Feel free to skip tho, I wont blame you. And whenever you see a block of text like this, bold and italics between parentheses, it’s just going to be a comment on mine and some opinions I have. It’s usually something that isn’t that related my interpretation of the game, but I felt like talking about it. So feel free to skip these too! :>)

Psychoanalysis is pseudoscience and Freud was a stupid bitch, HOWEVER, we can make something useful out of it! For example, projection. Projection is, in a simplified way, when you project your self onto others. And that situation, regardless if it is an actual projection of your own self, can help you to realize some aspects of yourself. Again, regardless if you are ACTUALLY projecting yourself, if that person has the same characteristics as you, or if you have the characteristic you think you are projecting, it doesn’t matter. What matters is that you can analyze that situation, and yourself by proxy. And if you abstract things enough we can realize that projection is just another way of saying “we can only understand the world from our point of view”, which means we think everyone goes through life with the same perspective we have, because that’s the only one we can have. I can’t access other’s point of view in pureness, as I will forever have my own personal experiences back seating, so yes, I will forever project my point of view onto others, because that’s my own and only way of viewing stuff.

But that doesn’t mean I can’t see those “projection moments” and analyze why I do those projections. For example I can dislike someone for being annoying and be like “Wait, hold on. Am I annoying? Is this me projecting or just common sense”. And regardless if it is actual projecting, I can think about my negative feelings. Maybe I just want someone who’s worse than me, maybe this is a weird way of self hatred, maybe I just don’t want to deal with the fact I’m annoying. All of those can be true or false, but the thinking process can lead me to analyze myself and become someone better.

And this is something I extend to dream analysis, as it very much doesn’t have a proven reality or a method, but it’s something we can use to understand someone’s point of view! If done right, of course. So it doesn't matter if dreams have obscured "true real" meanings to them or not, what matter is what we are able to gleam from it and try to understand the dreamer’s point of view.

I'm going to try to do a dream analysis, which will take both Freudian and Jungian analysis beats, as I do believe neither theory has a perfect method, but they are the most prominent theories that I'm familiar with. While Freud takes every dream as a glimpse of the subconscious, which shows repressed desires and impulses, Jung only considers dreams that resonates with the person to be relevant. In my opinion, no dream has an actual meaning, but we can abstract it into something useful, so even small details can reveal something about someone, even if that something is so small that some may consider it irrelevant. And I also don’t consider dreams to work as a “pathway” to the subconscious, as dreams are not limited to desirable actions/events only, given that nightmares exist and all.

And PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD don’t take anything I say about psychoanalysis or Jung or dream analysis as like the actual theories. I’m a psychology student and we do study Freud’s theories (haven’t gotten to Jung yet), but I’m still going through my classes and it’s very easy to just fumble the theories since they’re written in the most confusing way possible. SO don’t quote me on any of this, this is all for fun!

2. MY ACTUAL INTERPRETATION

FINALLY, here’s what I see in Yume Nikki! I tried to divide all my points by events, effects, places n all that stuff, just to keep myself organized, tho because a lot of it is just symbology interpretation, but lots of these overlap so it can get confusing. Plus I have MANY readings on the game, some of which don’t work perfectly together, since the game can get pretty “dense”, so I’ll try to write everything down in categories and by the end, attempt to put some of the bigger theories together in a more organized manner.

(LOL. I wrote this thinking I really could just write all my thoughts around Yume Nikki in one go, comical. I only really go into my interpretation of the effects here, and I think I’ll try to write more about my theories and interpretations, so just know this is incomplete)

2.1. EFFECTS

In my eyes, the effects were always “sections” of Madotsuki personality and self. Given she’s the only one in the game able to utilize them, but also she obtains them through interacting with others. Just like personality traits, we hardly ever just become what we are by existing, and we are molded through the experiences with have with others and the world around us.

Each trait can be noticeable or minor, but they are what forms the self, which may include how we view certain things, ourselves, others and concepts. That results into day to day impacts, like us acquiring certain hobbies, but it also can impact how we view difficult topics like death, relationship to others and so on.

Which I find interesting since when dropping the effects onto the nexus, they become these little egg thingies, an action that is necessary to finish the game. Being divorced from aspects of yourself for you to be able to take a leap out of balcony, gives me a lot of possible readings.

The least metaphorical one being Mado just leaving everything behind to commit suicide, in which the effects could be her negating what she considers flaws. Even if they aren’t strictly flaws, for someone to take their own life they need to be in such a horrible mental state that could skew their self-perspective to be strictly negative. And “leaving” those aspects behind to be “free” of them is, unfortunately, the logic that some people dealing with suicidal thoughts go through.

However, putting the effects into the nexus, could also mean the complete opposite. By making them concrete and physical, onto the nexus, the link between her dreams (subconscious) and her dream room (preconscious – located on the subconscious, but allows and negates the passage of information to consciousness) could mean acceptance of those aspects. Looking and manifesting the effects could be a metaphor for coming to terms with herself, even if some aspects could be seem as flaws by Mado’s eyes. This could have the same conclusion like the previous hypothesis, resulting in a suicide, but because she accepted she had “too many flaws”, also another sad reality. But if taken into the account that the suicide isn’t a desire to die, but a leap of faith to a new life (killing your old self basically), this could be a better and positive ending. Fist step for a change is acceptance and all that jazz.

Another possibly is that the effects aren’t personality traits, but specific memories that impacted her in one way or another through her life. In that read you can go either way with the accepting or rejecting of those memories, as described before. But the context would have different tone I think, because in this way, the effects could symbolize traumatic events that lead Mado to be in this state of mind, events that she has to accept and move on, or deny what happened and live possibly haunted by it.

Either way! Here’s some of the effects I think are most relevant:

2.1.1 Knife

While a lot of people see this as Mado’s violent tendencies, I always saw it as a defense mechanism, like pushing others away (and maybe even hurting others, but not limited to only physical violence) to protect yourself. This goes with the themes of constant isolation and silence her dreams have. With the few times an entity actively interact with you, the Toriningen, is triggered by the stabbing.

How I see this is Mado’s pushing other’s away, to be kept from being hurt. And that is seen how, regardless if she uses the knife on a passive character, they disappear (effectively cutting any interaction with them) or an active character like the Toriningen (forcefully isolating Mado), it ends with Mado being alone. In connection with some NPC’s moving away from her when she holds a knife, and hostile Toriningens isolating her without triggering them, this might be a reaction of how others have reacted to this self-isolating behavior Mado has, and has had for a while probably.

It’s also notably found on the emptiest and darkest world on all the dream zones (Dark World), probably how Mado feels about this actions. While mostly alone and quite, the zone still has a few NPCs, most of them barely reacting to anything Madotsuki does, but one follows her around the world (I think his name is Follony), giving that lingering feeling that despite everything, it still feels like there’s someone trying to get in. Regardless if there really is someone trying to get in, Mado may have some type of paranoia with others interacting with them, perceiving their attempts as prodding or “chasing”.

2.1.2. Medamaude

Somewhat similar to the knife, I think this is also related to Mado’s isolation. While the knife is the action of pushing other away, the Medamaude is the avoidance of others and her own behaviors. Often used to escape the rooms Toriningen put you on, I think Mado may have the behavior of simply turning a blind eye to these situations (literally closing your eyes and fist to escape), as a form of either coping or self defense.

2.1.3. Cat

Here’s where the messiness I mentioned before. I think the cat is Mado’s desire to be able to talk to other and be able to interact with them. While it seems contradicting with what I just wrote about the knife and Medamaude, I do think despite Mado’s self isolation, she still desires someone to trust or be able to have friends. It’s paradoxical, but it’s a common feeling many have, specially teenagers. Having success into pushing others away can actually be extremely painful, as the person is not being hurt specifically by others, but also does not have a support net or healthy (and necessary) interactions to build off.

The cat being a symbol for that is quite fitting, being an animal who many consider the cutest, but also having an image of being “distant”. Many people (usually people who don’t have cats) see them as “less loving” than other pets, like dogs for example, because they don’t understand the different ways cats show affection.

Madotsuki may want to be like that, be perceived as approachable and cute, but still able to maintain a distance, without getting “suffocated” by the relationships. This theory can also be supported by the fact when meowing she resembles the Maneki-neko, a Japanese talisman that is associated with good fortune and wish fulfillment. While the original and most common variant is white, a pink Maneki-neko is often associated with love, romance and relationships in general, so once again, bringing that desire for human interaction.

One thing of note too, is that the cat effect is slightly annoying to get, as the kitty-coin you get it from moves quite quickly, in comparison to other NPCs. This may be indicative that, while desirable, Mado finds difficulty into manifesting this approachable appearance, probably due to the established self-isolation mentioned before.

2.1.4. Triangle Kerchief and Nopperabou

Not gonna do a big text for these, I’m sure you already got it and are tired of me writing about isolation. Could mean feeling invisible, not being seen or that people don’t care about you (or are even afraid). Disassociation and reality detachment can also be a thing here.

2.1.5. Frog, Dwarf, Poop Hair, Fat and Buyo-buyo

These could all be representations of how Madotsuki is afraid of been seen as, or already perceives herself as. Although self-explanatory, these are very common anxieties teenagers (and adults) have, that can be extremely distressing and impacting in their mental health, regardless if those traits are actually negative (like there’s nothing wrong with being fat, short or be a little person). But, because of social and cultural notions of beauty standards, people who deviate from them are often made fun of, with some extreme cases of bullying leading to suicide or intense harm.

And me, while not being Japanese or having any deep understanding of the culture, have the impression that the norms there, are way harsher than here on Brazil (or America in general). While, yes, the social pressure and even stigmatization to look a certain way is definitely a problem in all countries, but with some examples like young girls starving themselves a few days before their weighting in health check ups (because they happen in the school and everybody knows everybody’s numbers), lead me to imagine just how the huge damage that can have in someone’s psyche, specially in a young girl.

For the frog effect I imagine it’s in association of feeling ugly in general, or even having acne (as some species of frogs have bumpy skin). Again, very subjective and not even inherently bad, but in associations of stories like the “frog prince” and saying like “ugly as a toad”, there is a cultural stigma with not fitting in visually. And again again, can have an immense impact in one’s mental health, confidence and self esteem.

And for the Poop hair, I have two readings: one in relation of poor hygiene as consequence of debilitating mental health problems, and the anxiety of been seen as stupid. The second one is also pretty self explanatory, it’s not nice to feel like you’re unintelligent. Grading specifically comes to mind, as Japan infamously has a harsh discipline between students by publishing their grades for everyone to see, even low grades. It’s something that already is difficult to deal with, as it feels like a spotlight is put onto you, but also, even more so if someone is struggling with psychological issues, which will discourage them to study at something that they already might be struggling at.

The mental health aspect can also affect the personal hygiene of someone, as mentioned. Some depressive episodes can lead to people not leaving their beds for days, which can lead to unpleasant smells, and in extreme cases even have excretions happen in bed. It’s something that is extremely sensitive to talk about, because it’s a humiliating experience to anybody, but it is a facet of mental health that is often unexplored. While unpleasant, some people may not have the will to get up and clean themselves, while simultaneously being deeply ashamed. Independent if Madotsuki is at that stage, I think she has anxieties of being seen as unhygienic, perhaps even as a burden to her caretakers (another common fear of people in this situation). Some people think her room is the full apartment, but I always saw as just a room, as we don’t see a bathroom or somewhere to cook, and that might explain why it’s pretty clean and organized, despite Mado’s clear debilitating mental health, as her parents would take care of her.

(Unrelated because I’m going to make a silly comment right after such a sensitive topic, but it’s actually insane how some people completely ignore some themes cause they seem stupid or gross, like poop. I know we live in a society that goes “hee hee poop funny ha ha” like those deranged poopie unicorn kids toys, but it’s like. Really important to take things seriously if you want to talk about depression and mental health? I don’t know man, it bothers me how some people sometimes just woobify depression and simply fucking ignore some aspects cause they’re “gross”. Just really dehumanizing. Like people will have sympathy for people who cut, but treat those with such low energy they physically cannot go to the bathroom as freaks. Not that we shouldn’t have sympathy for those who self harm, that isn’t at all what I’m saying, but this condition IS ALSO A FORM OF SELF HARM CAUSED BY EXTREME DEPRESSION. Sigh.)

2.1.6. Long Hair and Blonde Hair

In contrast with the previous effects, these two could indicate what Madotsuki wants to look like, or be seen as. Long hair is considered very feminine through many cultures and also as beautiful, so maybe that’s the desire. Mado’s hair already seems long, due to the pigtails having that length, so maybe it’s something else, like letting her hair free from the braids. Another theory, that relates to the hygiene topic mentioned, it’s that it’s someone common to tie hair up when it’s dirty, but a bun or a ponytail could be uncomfortable to sleep in, while the pigtails would suit much better.

The blonde hair however, many people associate with beauty, and sure it can be beautiful, but in Japan it’s quite uncommon. Once again, dunno much about Japanese culture, but there’s a few examples of people with blonde hair going to Japan and being stared at, mostly cause it’s uncommon, and maybe associated with Gyaru fashion, which can be seen as garish. It’s something that may have been changing currently, with international media and even Japanese celebrities dyeing their hair, but it still seems there’s a social stigma around it. So I’m not really sure how to interpret it. One reading could be that Mado would like to change her appearance, y’know? Just have a big change, I don’t know. This one (and the last 2 effects) kinda leave me stumped a bit.

2.1.7. Lamp and Stoplight

Beside the knife and the Bike, I think these two are the most iconic effects in the game! But beside that I think they can hold a lot of interpretations, from the most surface stuff to some abstract philosophy bullshit.

Starting with the lamp, I think it can either be just that, a lamp with dream logic. But also, I have a few other readings about it. One of them being Madotsuki’s desire to be able to clearly see things, as in being able to understand her struggles and how the world works. Specifically on teenhood, people start to develop a lot of the questionings about how things work, which often is confused with just having and attitude or being rebellious. Being curious about the world and it’s functioning is normal, and it is also extremely common with mentally ill children, because they struggle to understand their negative feelings and wish to “solve” them. By having a lamp as the head, it could mean Madotsuki is trying to be “rational” about her issues, trying to see things fully without any shadows obscuring her perception. If it’s effective is another can of worms, but it’s comforting to a light (explanation) for an issue.

Another theory of the lamp that I have, is that it could possible symbolize how Mado feels about having mental issues, as if it something that everyone can notice, bright and noticeable. Not only an anxiety of being visibility mentally ill a very common anxiety people who are mentally ill worry about, but the heat of the lamp can also bring a new meaning to “burn with shame”.

For the stoplight, I actually side with the people some kind of traffic accident must have happened with Madotsuki (at least) around to witness it. She being able to control how others react may be an indication of how she wish she could actually do that, maybe to stop a traffic accident, maybe to stop someone’s actions that seem malicious, so on. Although it’s something I think I can only explain by going over some of the theories I have.

2.1.8. Umbrella, Hat and Scarf, Towel and Bicycle

These items, to me, don’t need to have specific meaning themselves, as they are very common everyday items and might just be that. I often dream I wear flip flops, but to me it doesn’t feel like a metaphor for anything, as I wear them everyday in my house. So these give me the impression of just that, representation of something that is considered normal and present on her life.

Although, the umbrella, bicycle and hat/scarf could indicate Mado’s desire to go outside. These could also be items that USED to be normal everyday items, but no longer are due to her being stuck insider her room. And highlighting the bicycle on it’s on, it’s a way of transportation that is very freeing, due to the person riding it being the one in control (different from taking the train or a car ride).

In contrast, the towel can be the comfort she feels by being inside and/or the fear of going outside. When using the effect, Mado sneezes, indicating she’s sick, so maybe there’s an association that she gets sick very often, probably by going outside. And that can corroborate the umbrella and hat/scarf, as they would protect her from getting sick (protect her from the outside).

2.1.9. Severed Head, Yuki-onna, Witch and Oni

While these could be an indication of Madotsuki “feeling like a monster”, or displaced, it could easily be an indication of just an interest in the supernatural and fantasy. Specially the witch effect that resembles Kiki from Kiki’s delivery service. I don’t think it’s a stretch to say Madotsuki (and Kikiyama by extent) may be a fan of Ghibli films, given Uboa can also be a reference to No Face.

2.1.10. Neon and Flute

Dude I don’t fucking know. LMAO. Maybe she likes playing the flute and think neons are cool. But for real, they may be simply just that, as again, not everything needs to have a “”deep”” meaning like I have for the others.

But if I HAD to come up with something, I’d say the neon effect is Mado’s desire to be noticed and the flute the desired to either be heard or create something. And both can be an indication that Madotsuki has an affinity for art, given the drastically changing style of her dreams, something that can happen with people who play and experiment with art often.

(ay. i was going to write more but hey i got tired so that's it for today. hope you liked my insane ramblings!)

#yume nikki #APOLOGIES IF SOME OF THIS DOESNT MAKE SENSE #didnt proof read plus idk if its comprehensible at all #srry for party rocking (being artsy fartsy about yume nikki)#id love to hear what people think about this #and honestly if i could get some criticism on how it write #idk if i just overcritical or if i actually write in a weird way #def have a hard time to make things succinct

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clay-cuttlefish · 11 months

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Finishing off every Question comic with Bombshells. I procrastinated on this for a while because I don't want to be done and have a real count of how many Question comics are bad, but I can't ignore it forever.

War Stories

Renee's kind of a fusion of her late Gotham Central and post-52 self, plus some unique traits just from this universe. She's got a lot of the guilt and poorly-hidden rage, but she's Not A Cop.

She's around for a while, and isn't totally irrelevant, but mostly she's one of Kate's love interests.

She and Kate found a kid named Jason, which went exactly as well as you'd expect the Bat adopting a Jason to go, and that's the big incident that tore their relationship apart.

Like a lot of the characters her personality's a little shaky, wobbling between a distinct sharp-edged self and the generic-author-voice that everyone falls into sometimes. None of it is a full "she would not fucking say that", it's just bland.

Men Who Would Be Kings

Instead of being a noir detective, she's drawing more on adventurer archaeologist tropes.

I actually really enjoy this! It's a neat way to switch up her background while keeping some of the pulp vibes.

I don't think it'd work for a story that's closer to canon, but Bombshells is a very distinct Elseworld that reinterprets and un-legacies a ton of characters, not working in canon isn't a problem.

Also I think it's fun that all the heroes are lesbians and there's a lot of crack ship flirting. It's weird sometimes but for the most part I'm on board with the lesbian divorce polycule.

Mechanical Gods

It's a little weird to me that Renee's the Question at all, since she doesn't have any theming, costume elements, relevant backstory, or annoying cryptic dialogue.

Even when there's theme-based banter she still gets left out half the time, since the Question doesn't mesh well with everyone else's animal gimmicks.

There's a single page of Renee's guilt issues and then it turns into the BatCat soap opera.

What's Past is Prologue

Renee being called the mother of Kate's child makes me mildly unhinged, especially because Kate has picked up the Bat responsibility of having way too many love interests and is cheating on her girlfriend.

They hold hands and then disappear from the comic for the last quarter of its run to go be gay and blow up fascists in Spain, which counts as a happy ending.

Bombshells United - War Bonds

Sequel time.

Renee gets a lot more focus in this arc than in all of Bombshells, and this arc is mostly a take on the Black Adam plot from 52, which is a neat bit of spotlight.

The writing, especially the dialogue, is. Well. I am lying to myself about it being alright because the batshit ways it riffs on various canon stories are stuck in my brain a little, but it's pretty bad.

Absolute galaxy brain shit to put the inevitable Jason Resurrection Angst into the 52 plot. Sure, I have reservations about how maternally Kate and Renee are written, but "what if instead of Under the Red Hood we just made Kate and Renee really sad" is such a power move I don't actually care.

Seriously it's such a flex to bring back Jason only to have him walk back into the afterlife with a minor character from a decade-old event. No Bat-importance for him.

I don't think Bombshells is a particularly deep take on Renee, but there's a real attempt to use her character history beyond being a cop, she gets new angles and unique elements, it tries. That means a lot when Renee has 98 non-canon-or-DCAU comic appearances, maybe a dozen of them are doing anything with her, and the best actual take on her as the Question is still Scooby-Doo.

#clayposts #clayreads #the question #renee montoya

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a-river-of-stars · 1 year

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Portmanteau ship names in Gundam Wing fandom: a shitpost

(written in response to @kirinjaegeste ’s posts)

So here’s the thing. While Gundam Wing fandom’s two-digit numerical ship system has a long history, I actually prefer either portmanteau ship names or three-digit ship designation (ex: 1x2x1). This isn’t because I don’t like the two-digit system or because I'm trying to make a statement about my gay ships not having tops or bottoms. It’s just for practical purposes. While the two-digit system works fine if you’re looking at a site with ONLY Gundam Wing on it, a lot of sites (Tumblr included) host more than one fandom. There are other fandoms I’ve been in that used two numbers with an x between to indicate Season/Series # x Episode #. And there are several other fandoms using numbers for their ships, too...let me tell you, I did not know there were people who shipped Engines 3 and 4 from Thomas and Friends but I now have a fondness for Gordon x Henry. With these two factors combined, it makes it hard to find things with just the two-digit numerical ships. When I first went looking for ship stuff for Gundam Wing I used the Tumblr search bar and the two-digit ships and ended up with almost entirely irrelevant results. I was not happy.

When I first posted about GW back in 2017 I used the ship name Troquat for 3x4x3 because I KNOW I saw トロカト on a doujin cover at some point and I assumed it would be acceptable to use that in the English-speaking fandom. It was distinctive and easy to remember, and I stand by that name even if at least one other person laughed at me and said it looked like I came from a darker timeline. That hurt, by the way. :( I settled for using three digits to indicate a ship because no one makes fun of it and it still gets the point across to my satisfaction. I like three-digit and will probably continue to use it. But portmanteaux are still an option that’s been mostly untapped in English-speaking GW fandom.

So, for your viewing pain pleasure, here are my proposed portmanteau ship names from a darker timeline (most popular ships are in bold; upper case on the second half of the portmanteau optional):

1 Heeduo. Heelena or Heerelena (I think I’ve actually seen Heeriri used in English-speaking fandom, which is accurate to doujin ヒイリリ, but I hesitate to use that because Relena’s name in English-speaking fandom isn’t rendered as Ririna). Fortunately, the two most-used ships for Heero make some decent portmanteaux. There’s also HeeTro, HeeQuat, HeeWu/Heefei (katakana for that reads a bit like ‘Beefy’ 🥩 in Japanese actually...). HeeZechs (we could also shorten that to Hechs (lol), or we could flip it around to get ZechsHee, which sounds very Zexy indeed). HeeTreize/Heatrays ♨️ or maybe Heerenada? HeeDoro/Heerothy? Lot of possibilities here. But I am personally offended that there is no character available to form the ship Hee-Man. 💪

2 Hilduo works well as a portmanteau because one has a ‘d’ at the end of their name and the other has a ‘d’ at the beginning, so they blend nicely. It seems Wufei is quite popular with Duo after Heero and Hilde... Wuduo? That one sounds like I’m trying to say ‘wood’ in Japanese a la Cardcaptor Sakura. Could go as Wuo, which sounds like ‘whoa’ so that’s neat. Or my personal favorite Duofei, which I would definitely refer to as ‘Duffles’ for the hell of it. How about Maxwufei? Sounds like we get a lot of Wufei there. As for Solo, I guess it’s either DuSolo or SolDuo. There’s also DuQuat and DuTrowa/TroDuo. Putting the ‘Du’ first makes everyone Duo is shipped with seem very French-ly masculine. :3

3 My beloved Troquat (troquât means ‘swapped/traded’ in French, which is great because it basically implies they’re vers right there in the name). Quatre and Trowa have a shared ‘tr’ at the end of one name and the beginning of the other, so they form the absolutely perfect portmanteau of Quattro...unfortunately it’s so perfect that it’s an actual common irl word, so you’ll come up with a lot of irrelevant results in Italian or some Audi adverts if you use it. Could go with Quatrowa, but now your Audi adverts will be in Polish. So Troquat works best, I think. Other ships for Trowa might be Trofei (would jokingly refer to that as ‘Truffles,’ which I can enjoy all day just like silly ship names involving Wufei). Maybe TroMiddie (this reminds me of Voldemort’s Muggle name. Tomriddle, Tromiddie. It also sounds like a form of dramedy that is particularly devastating: trauma+comedy). UnTro/Trowune? Maybe TroTro or Tro² if you’re shipping OG Trowa Barton with the teenager who stole his identity? Who else could Trowa even be shipped with idk.

4 We already covered most of the popular ships for Quatre, but we’ve still got Dorothy, which would be QuaDoro/Quatrothy. There’s the far more interesting Quadoroth, which sounds like the name of an evil wizard but from a different author. Quatalonia works well as a portmanteau, but Dorothy isn’t often referred to by her family name. For Relena we could do Quatrelena, which is a solid portmanteau with their whole names joined at the common ‘re’. There’s Wufei, too, but I don’t know if Quatfei sounds better than WuQuat. If you’re into father figure kink there could be some Quatrashid or Quatshid (which reminds me of Cait Sith)... and there is also the best ship, Quatrock! It’s Quatre and his dear Sandrock. 🤖😽

5 WuMei and Wufeize/WuTreize and WuSally (Wully! WOOLLY!! 🐑 I love Wufei ship names!) are pretty much all I’ve got left for Wufei pairings. But can you imagine being the poor Wufei-and-Une-shipping bastard who has to say their ship name is Wune or Uwu?

6 Zechs and Noin don’t have a good portmanteau, and with their numerical designations being 6 and 9 I don’t think anyone would want to give it up anyway. This one isn’t too bad for practical purposes; 6 and 9 aren’t nearly as common in fandoms as smaller numbers.

9 Salnoin. It’s fine. Perfectly serviceable. Could be worse. Reminds me of salmon. 🦈 (Yes I know that’s a shark, lay off.) We could make that one Nally or Nolly instead I think.

13 Treizechs. They blend together nicely because they share the ‘ze’. Treizune is neat and comes with the added bonus of looking like someone trying to write ‘treason’ in a way that will get past AI censors. All of his common ships are now covered, but I’ll throw in Quatreize for free since there’s some interesting compare/contrast between the two characters as leaders that could be explored.

I think I covered all the ships likely to feature Relena and Dorothy except the most important: ReleDor. Which sounds like a place name from Tolkien verse. Roaming over the bounteous hills and mysterious valleys of Reledor. Shit yea. Guess it could also work as Dorelena, but it’s not as cool imo.

My final entry here is for the excellent rarepair Rylvia, aka RelenaxSylvia Noventa, which I started shipping while working on a secret project that never saw the light of day. I would have gone with the very elegant Sylena/Selena, but it’s so elegant that it’s an actual popular irl name and I’d never be able to sort for content for my ship that way.

If you sat through all that, merci beaucoup! I wasted hours of my life typing this abomination out and I’m glad to share.

#gundam wing #mobile suit gundam wing #new mobile report gundam wing #gw shitpost #1x2 #1x2x1 #2x5 #2x5x2 #3x4 #3x4x3 #...do I really have to tag ALL the ships?#ship names #gw ship names #portmanteau

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harvestmoth · 2 years

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?? started with automation sana from yesterday and somehow it turned into pokemon

#accidentally thought of project sekai pokemon au #each unit has a type theme that i havent thought out completely #all ive got is ghost type niigo water type mmj with decided pokemon #fire type vbs and maybe steel wxs and psychic or rock l/n #i dont know them well enough #did decide akito gets a johto typhlosion though. for the bit #houndoom probably wouldve fit better but. for the bit #anyways look two gacha games with characters i like. not posting them separately because its funnier that way #automation sana is from back before she was powered down. i like to think her paint job peeled off during the years she was gone #the snaa is irrelevant i just think shes neat #also i think in a pokemon magireco au sana would have an eevee maybe #shed evolve them into either a leafeon for the grass type or an umbreon because of the high def and spdef stats #sorry im coping with the fact that i do not own splatoon 3 by thinking about pokemon #wait i just remembered frosslass. could also fit mafuyu with mimikyu going with mizuki #also a possibility if mizuki having hoopa is too boring #also mmj pokemon are mino with vaporeon haru with piplup shizu with azumarill and air with either slowpoke or gorebyss #all started with the thought that kanade looked like a litwick btw #id tag this but its too much of a mess of things i think #two different games with too many characters and im too lazy

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vynsvision · 3 years

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What if MC wasn't a lawyer?

Originally, this was going to be a list for me to have on hand for self-inserts or if I wanted to adjust Rosa for a fic. It become a brainstorming piece about all the alternate versions or jobs/work positions Rosa could have held instead of being a lawyer for Themis Law Firm.

WC: roughly 1.2k

In my daily checking of the "tears of themis" tag (by recent because yeah duh), I read sdaomine's minific au about vilhelm (svart!vyn) kidnapping his enemy's daughter and proposing marriage. And then another post in the tag was maybe about Marius's assistant minific- not sure bc I didnt read it. [edit: did read it later and no it wasn't, but this is now irrelevant.] But, point is, it got my brain going and thinking and I realized each of the boys have like an alternate place for Rosa to have been instead of Artem's subordinate in the Themis Law Firm.

Vyn:

1. A Svart citizen/person of royalty- someone who was/is also of lineage, and they connect that way. Maybe helping him ease the dislike he has of his home country. This person has the money and connections to get answers.

2. Someone Vyn works with or went to school with for Psychology n stuff. Someone who would also work at Giannovyn. Someone who knows how to observe and analyze the effects of the NXX drug, and maybe is sent from like the govt to discover how serious this is and how hard they need to crack down.

Marius:

1. His assistant. Duh. What more do I say. Not sure how they would be relevant to the nxx investigation but whatever.

2. Heir or high up in a competing company, and they personally are into biology and chemistry outside of work bc mc having two degrees or doctorates or whatever would be hot. Or maybe 3 bc they can have one in business, too. Sexy.

Luke:

1. Fellow NSB agent is the obvious piece. It would, of course, change their dynamic drastically, but I just think MC should be allowed to hot as an agent. Maybe they were kept secret and mc is undercover as Artem's subordinate. Anyway.

2. Even better, (or worse, depending) MC was recruited by some other agency/organization and so when they realize they're on competing intelligence sides...... hhhgg.

Now that I think about it, Artem also has an alternate:

1. Simply, instead of working with Themis, MC works for Baldr. Imagine that. Basically the same, but MC might be harder and Artem and them would be enemies to lovers. Sexy.

Darius: (because this is My Post)

1. Fellow detective. Pretty straightforward.

2. Someone who is in witness protection or is currently a Criminal (boss or second-hand) but isn't going to be pulled in because of a Deal that they and Darius make. Hhhhhhh this is self-indulgent but let me live.

Now, to a degree, I understand why MC is a lawyer. Someone has to prosecute (or whatever) the bad guys or the offending party. But if we went with any of these differing routes, here are some ideas-

1. In biology or chemistry, it would be neat to be able to test chemicals n stuff. Like... seeing how one thing reacts to a different thing, and trying to find the right combination.

2. Business... not really sure, but it could open up more characters and arguments/debates/conversations with people who are shady but you can't just pull them into court.

3. Agent stuff... this is obvious but a fight. This is, of course, the most attractive option, because it wouldn't be something you could skip- the cards would change to be able to be applied to weapons, maybe, or if you could have backup. Like "Clash Royale" from Supercell or something. That would be so cool!! This is. The coolest option so far.

4. Baldr option doesn't change this, really. It would still be debates n shit. Which is fine bc it wouldn't be Themis. Maybe we could debate against Artem in public court. Imagine the fics........ *ahem* Anyway!

5. Svart option... this would probably be similar to the business option. Connecting with government contacts and having a wider range of authority would be an attractive feature. Like, being able to meet with a government official, and then stepping out and checking in with a street contact and comparing the information. Maybe thats too agent-y, but I didn't specify what part of the Svart government MC's Svart family would work for/be a part of.

6. Psychology option (like if mc worked at Giannovyn) could be more specific like figuring if someone is lying n stuff? Watching someone speaking and having been told to look for certain tells, and you have to catch them by taping on them in that spot when the tell happens.

7. While an assistant [to Marius] would have access to the same stuff, they would have access to equals in other places. Someone who is overlooked, and would have a better connection with househands or bystanders, yanno? Being able to use the authority of Pax and being the CEO'S assistant, but also being able to meet regular people and being able to relate to them without the intimidating aspect.

8. As for the Darius mention, a fellow detective would be neat because then you can take part in interrogations or investigations- as someone posted the other day as an irl-lawyer-reacts-to-lawyer-otome said in the post, lawyers don't actually partake in the investigation. It just. Doesnt happen. And they're right!! So let me take part in investigating and interrogating and gathering info beside Darius!!!

9. Or as a criminal having connections under the table n shit. This one i mostly explained before but yeah having connections to who's selling what and oh through the grapevine of Crime or homeless or the overlooked, this is the info I got. Mmmmm. Thinking again of fics we won't get bc mhy are cowards

Honestly, the more I think about this, the more I wonder why the Heck MHY didnt choose these options. "For the cards" makes sense, I guess, but when you dont have to pay attention to the debate and they're just there to get resources and not pay attention to your phone... its disappointing. I do like the story finale debates because you have to choose the right evidence that applies, or the "hmm, no, this evidence doesn't match with that evidence" parts in the main episodes of story... (wow, do I just miss the main story?)

I think the cards could apply in different ways and they could really get more player interaction and giving-a-shit. It would be cool to know the stats of cards better, kinda like in Genshin, where you have to build characters a certain way to get the best results, whereas in ToT im pretty sure you just. Level shit up.

These are just my thoughts, but I'd like to hear if anyone has additional ideas or thoughts!

[Note: this was mostly written in descending order, so if I say "theres not much on this thought" in one place and then later elaborate, its because more came to me later for a different spot on this post.] [It was also typed and posted via the mobile app so please bear with me if there are errors... I'm doin my best]

#tears of themis #luke pearce #marius von hagen #artem wing #vyn richter #darius morgan #thank u for indulging me for this post and letting me mention darius #unintentionally this is laid out in order of my bias #except if darius would be canon and my hcs would be canon the order would be vyn marius darius luke artem #anyway #tears of themis headcanon #tears of themis analysis #tears of themis theory #ida brainstorms

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bobbimorses · 3 years

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Circuses are a cultural anachronism at this point. Maybe they didn't contextualize Clint within those bounds because it's the bad kind of dated and hokey. Being raised in the circus is already weird. Being raised in the circus anytime after the 1960s? Culturally irrelevant to the audience AND really weird.

oh believe me, the concept was already dated in the 1960s. i also understand that SHIELD is the stand-in weapon backstory, so i don't think mcu clint needs to be contextualized purely within the bounds of "a circus." this isn't like a deal-breaker for me or anything.

i'm just saying that in a universe based on the comics, which has superheroes--a concept which in and of itself is kinda hokey--having a guy reference that he maybe worked at a carnival one time as a teen runaway or something would be neat when said comics about said guy had him living in a carnival. i mean, they had a whole russian sleeper agent family plot going on post-1991 in black widow.

#i simply get extra enjoyment in comic adaptations referencing major comic details #esp when it's a big part of the comic character #it's fun for me #clint was already a walking cultural anachronism in the 1960s with the orphanage and circus thing #it was already mostly foster homes in the US in the 50s

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kinogane · 3 years

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Meditations on Playing as Earthlings in Dragon Ball Xenoverse, Part 2

(previously)

The Dragon Ball Xenoverse games allow you to play as five races: Earthling (the default selection), Saiyan, Majin, Namekian, and the elegantly named "Frieza Race", with the first three races having an additional choice of gender. Compared to the Dragon Ball games mentioned in the previous post, Xenoverse probably differentiates the most between race/gender combinations. Each has a drastically different basic moveset that will be extremely relevant in combat, especially for strike-oriented playstyles, each have different stat spreads (and sometimes mechanics) that incentivize different playstyles, and arguably most importantly, each have their own unique techniques, the centerpiece of which is the race-specific Awoken Skill.

For context, in the first Dragon Ball Xenoverse, there were two problems with transformation skills like Super Saiyan and Unlock Potential. First was that they counted as Super Attacks, so you would have to give up a skill slot to make use of them, and second was that the transformations available to your character consisted of Kaioken, Unlock Potential, and variants of Super Saiyan. So like past Dragon Ball games, you weren't especially rewarded for playing a non-Saiyan character, since it meant you had to run Unlock Potential (or run a gimmicky Kaioken build), while Saiyans could at least nominally choose between that, and multiple variants of Super Saiyan that suited their playstyle.

This was remedied in the second Xenoverse game with the addition of Awoken Skills, which were transformations that occupied a separate slot. More importantly, Xenoverse 2 also added race-specific Awoken Skills, which meant that there was actually a compelling reason to pick races besides Saiyans.

In theory, at least. In practice?

Frieza Race characters probably gained the most in the sequel. Their Awoken Skill, Turn Golden, is relatively straightforward, both from a gameplay standpoint and an aesthetic standpoint. Your ki blasts are stronger and you do the Golden Frieza thing. Much like the form in the series proper, it's a bit dull and uninspired as a body recolor, but it is identifiable as a powerful transformation.

Namekians gained the ability to Become Giant, hearkening back to King Piccolo in the original Dragon Ball (and I guess Lord Slug in the movies), which as I understand was a fun transformation to use before it got nerfed in subsequent patches. Currently, it's a neat gimmick that's fun to mess around with and can be effective in bursts, but the stamina drain means it can't see the extended use that just about every other Awoken Skill can.

Majin gained the wildly unpopular ability to undergo Purification, which translates into becoming a Kid Buu with a special moveset. A Kid Buu that, mind you, only changes its skin and eye color as appropriate; regardless of how you customized your character before the transformation, your Purified Majin is going to look basically the same as any other Purified Majin, which is kind of a problem in a game where a significant portion of the userbase's interest in the game is at least partially in coordinating outfits for their player characters.

Earthlings got to ride on a Flying Nimbus and use the Power Pole.

The race-specific Awoken Skill for Earthlings is riding around on a cloud that kinda already loses a lot of its luster when, by construction, all characters can fly, and wielding a weapon/tool that hasn't been relevant since the original Dragon Ball. It's a nostalgia play that basically no Earthling character is going to use extensively, since you can't use your own skills and are limited to a moveset that loses its visual and gameplay novelty in minutes, at most.

It should be mentioned that Saiyans, as of the time of this writing, have access to five variants of Super Saiyan.

(Caveat that I can't speak for the PvP side of these evaluations, and quite frankly, I couldn't be bothered since Xenoverse PvP seems thoroughly unappealing, but I digress.)

So yet again, even when concessions are explicitly made to make playing non-Saiyan races an appealing alternative from a gameplay standpoint, Saiyans are still the clear winners and Earthlings are still clear losers. Furthermore, there's at least an argument that the non-Earthling Awoken Skills at least invoke an image of power as understood in Dragon Ball. For all the shortcomings of the Namekian and Majin Awoken Skills, you can at least point to King Piccolo and Kid Buu as signifiers of strength. If anything, the image of Goku on the Nimbus with the Power Pole is reminiscent of a time when Dragon Ball was significantly less concerned with displays of power, which is kind of counterintuitive when it's invoked as a method of attaining greater power.

Put reductively, it's kind of a bummer, but then again, isn’t this dynamic, of Saiyans being given the lion's share of power and relevance while Earthlings get virtually none, the most Dragon Ball shit ever?

Hindsight has only made Videl's presence in the early parts of the Buu Saga all the more fascinating. For that run of episodes, all the way up to the World Martial Arts Tournament, the degree to which Videl is an active participant and outright combatant in the action is kind of surreal. It's not entirely without precedent, since Chi-Chi had her moments in the original Dragon Ball and the occasional moment in Z, but unlike Chi-Chi, it really does seem like Videl's perfectly content to be this active for as long as she's around. What's more, the show explicitly makes reference to her being wildly more powerful than her dad, who himself is established as of legitimate world champion caliber, and it even goes out of its way to have Gohan teach her to fly. While that scene is absolutely primarily meant to set up her true purpose in the series writ large, there's a pretty good correlation in Dragon Ball between "people who can fly" and "people who can at least fight a little".

Then, of course, Spopovich happens.

I'm not particularly interested in litigating post-crisis Videl here, since it's been discussed plenty, and yeah, I also think it's more than a little bit of a bummer. But knowing the trajectory of post-Z Dragon Ball, especially Super, it makes Videl's irrelevance on an action level kind of an inevitability? Like, yeah, maybe if she bounced back harder and played a larger role after the Spopovich fight, you maaaaaaaaaaaaaaybe could draw a line to her at least being comparable to the likes of Krillin, Tien, and Yamcha, but given the reality of modern Dragon Ball, would that be anything more than a pyrrhic victory?

So really, when you consider that the frankly ridiculous power scaling of Super is really just the logical extension of the scaling in Z that was already well underway by the Buu Saga, it naturally raises the question of why they bothered to even make Videl this much of an active force in the first place. From square one, she's arguably destined to be relegated to Gohan's love interest and future wife, so why go through the effort of showing the audience that she's stronger than every Earthling that's not a Z-Fighter? It does parallel Chi-Chi's strength in Dragon Ball to help further foreshadow her pairing with Gohan like Chi-Chi with Goku, but then why make her be that into fighting when Chi-Chi was always clearly content to be a housewife?

And like, Jesus Christ, all that only to be that definitive with that Spopovich fight?

I bring Videl up because my main created character in Xenoverse 2 is a female Earthling. Ever since I booted the game for the first time, there was no doubt in my mind that I was going to primarily play as a female Earthling, because with it came the knowledge that I was going to control a female Earthling doing and achieving some frankly wild shit, like going toe-to-toe with Final Form Mira, literal deities, Jiren, and Ultra Instinct Goku(?!?), sometimes back-to-back in certain Parallel Quests.

And of course I can, because that is the entire reason for the Xenoverse games' existence. The game has always been an unabashed power fantasy all about defeating some of the most powerful entities in Dragon Ball history with your own created character on your own terms.

And yet, as I do all of this with my female Earthling, the knowledge that in canon, the most powerful analogue to my character is Videl, a character who almost literally gets the relevance beaten out of her in a brutal and unforgettable manner, makes the experience feel almost rebellious. It feels like everything from the godawful Awoken Skill to the subpar race/gender stat distribution for a strike-oriented build to the very nature and history of Dragon Ball itself is working against my character becoming a ludicrously powerful force of nature, and yet I not only can, but literally must push through and go even further beyond.

I cannot emphasize enough that this sense of transgression has no basis at all when it comes to the game. Absolutely nothing about the Xenoverse games explicitly suggests that Earthlings, female or otherwise, are somehow destined to be strictly lesser than Saiyans or any other races. Again, the game is an unabashed power fantasy; it's going to let you achieve that power fantasy regardless of race or gender, because to do so otherwise is completely antithetical to the entire reason people play the game in the first place.

But looking at past Dragon Ball games, at least to me, makes clear that they really didn't have to include the option to play as an Earthling. They clearly feel no obligation to do so, since they've excluded it in previous games. They completely dodge the need to include a human-like race option with the existence of Saiyans, who aren't even differentiated by the presence of a tail. I genuinely don't think any significant number of people would have even batted an eye over the exclusion of Earthlings. ‘Cause, you know, it's Dragon Ball, why would you play as an Earthling?

But they did. They let you choose to play as an Earthling, a race that Dragon Ball has essentially been drilling into your head, for years, is a strictly less powerful and less interesting version of Saiyans with practically no upside. They gave you the option, and I took it, all because it effectively let me play out an extended Videl what-if by proxy and stretch credibility into complete, unrecognizable nonsense.

I recognize that this absolutely reflects more on me and my relationship with Dragon Ball as a whole than it does on Xenoverse, but when it’s the only Dragon Ball game that embraces customizable characters to the extent that it does, it’s necessarily going to be the only game that actually lets me grapple with that tension between the source and the spin-off, and reckon with how that can shape the audience’s experience and perception of the bigger picture.

#dragon ball xenoverse #dragon ball xenoverse 2 #xenoverse #xenoverse 2 #dbxv #dbxv2 #xv2 #dragon ball #dragon ball z #dbz #videl #videl satan

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rosaliepostsstuff · 4 years

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Chasing birds | T. W.

Talbott Winger x reader

not adding a taglist cause it's the first hphm fic I've posted so I'm not sure if you're into it

Summary: The reader realises Talbott is spending the holidays at Hogwarts and decides to stay behind too, to keep him company

Reader's house not specified!

Word count: 2195

Warnings: mentions of food, mentions of parent death, mentions of difficult family relationships

a/n: it's assumed the reader has helped him with the necklace, is an animagus (the form isn’t mentioned) and had the first date, valentines day and festival date with him. I also assumed the festival took place at the very beginning of year 5 while it was still summer and it's now the following winter.

Also, I pretended Bea didn’t get sucked into the portrait because I didn’t want Penny all sad.

It was safe to say that most of Hogwarts students were looking forward to the winter break. Some because of the Holidays, some purely because of the time off.

Some were counting down the days since the very beginning of the term, some since November 1st, some from the moment the castle grounds had been graced with the first snow of the season.

Winter had its own charm to it. The castle got its share of sunlight during the warmer months, towards the end of the school year, as the summer was approaching, and at the very beginning of it as the summer was slowly fading away. But once the grounds were covered in snow, the grand castle seemed even brighter – the winter sunlight and sky is different but all that light, reflecting off the snow and amplifying, seeped through the windows.

You were already filled with anticipation, more and more with each day that separated you from Christmas break.

You were currently counting down the minutes till the charms class ended, your last class that Friday – minutes to your last weekend before Christmas. You divided your attention between encouraging the blond Gryffindor in lifting his feather and the watch on your hand ticking away.

“Alright then, dear students, that’s all for today! Some of you I will not be seeing until the next term so I’d like to wish you all Merry Christmas, Happy New Year and may you all have a nice rest before the new term starts! Class dismissed.” Said Flitwick cheerfully as a chorus of thanks and all kinds of wishes followed, before the students began to pour out of the classroom.

“Gee, you’d think there was a fire…” you heard Jae say groggily from behind you as he was getting up from his nap and stretched lazily. You looked at the crowd trying to squeeze through the door and chuckled, agreeing with him.

When the crowd thinned a bit, you saw someone you immediately recognised walk into the classroom. You smiled to yourself at the sight and involuntarily paused your actions to look at the tall boy in his Ravenclaw robes try to push through the students with a bit of a grimace on his face. You could almost hear his thoughts in your head.

“You coming, Y/N?” said Rowan from beside you.

At the sound of your name Talbott looked up in your direction and you briefly met his eyes. He smiled as soon as he saw you and you smiled back at him, waving your hand lightly. He raised his hand in response for just half a second before turning his attention to Flitwick.

“Coming,” you said quietly, turning to Rowan who now was standing with arms crossed on her chest and suppressing a grin.

“Ohh shut up..” you said jokingly flinging your bag over your shoulder.

“I did not say a thing..!” she countered, giggling.

On your way out, you managed to hear a bit of Talbott’s conversation with Flitwick.

“He’s staying at school for holidays..?” Rowan mentioned, looking over her shoulder after you left the classroom.

“Yeah…” you went quiet for a bit, thinking.

You had to admit, you hadn’t thought about it before, but it was quite logical. When you first learned about Talbott’s parents, you never pressed the topic further and you didn’t know whether he had any other family, someone to spend the holidays with. And during all those times you spent Christmas at Hogwarts, was he at the castle too? Hiding away somewhere, alone?

“You know, I gotta do something real quick. Meet you in the dorm later?” you said to your friend, already quickening your pace, finger-gunning in her direction.

“Sure, yeah,” she answered, a bit puzzled, yet entirely used to it.

——————⁛⁙⁘◊⁘⁙⁛——————

“Oh I am so excited, I can’t wait! You see, each year Bea and I, we have a gingerbread house making contest. Neither one of us is very good at it, but it’s so much fun. Mum always has both of them on display…”

You listed to Penny ramble in excitement about Christmas over dinner and couldn’t help but smile a bit.

“Oooh, Talbott! Talbott, come on over here!” she called over your head all of a sudden, waving energetically at the boy who just looked as if he got caught, but walked over to your table anyway, then sat down opposite you with a quiet greeting.

“What about you, Y/N? Are you going home for the holidays this year?” Penny asked curiously.

Your heart rate picked up a bit, before you answered, “No, I’m staying here,” you glanced at Talbott and met his eyes before he looked back down onto his plate.

“Oh, ok,” said Penny, before changing the topic.

——————⁛⁙⁘◊⁘⁙⁛——————

The case with Talbott wasn’t so easy. Your crush on him started with you being simply intrigued. You met him in your third year and there was just something about him that wouldn’t allow you to just let him be, no matter how tall he put up his walls. You felt the need to make him feel comfortable around you and you wanted to get to know him better. That’s how you became friends.

But when you did get to know him, that’s when you were truly lost. His wit, sarcastic sense of humour. His calmness and collectiveness. And him opening up to you felt more rewarding than anything else.

There were so many moments between you, the dates you went on, where you wanted to just take a dive and go all in, and each time you were closer to doing so. But in the end, you were scared of scaring him away, even if he showed time and time that he felt the same way. He even announced out loud that you were his date at the festival!

Still, each time you got back to the starting point, stuck somewhere between friends and lovers.

——————⁛⁙⁘◊⁘⁙⁛——————

You woke up a bit giddy and slightly nervous. Last afternoon all the students not staying at school for the holidays left. You got freshened up and dressed, then headed to the great hall for breakfast.

When you walked through the great entrance you scanned the four, almost empty tables. And there he was indeed, at the very end of the Ravenclaw table, as usual.

“Talbott!” you greeted, sliding into the seat next to him.

He hadn’t noticed you approaching and got a bit startled, “Y/N, Merlin…” he said, putting down his toast and placing a hand over his chest, “what are you doing here?”

“Tsk, already so accusatory. I came here to have breakfast with you and spend some quality time together!” You said in an exaggerated tone.

You could’ve sworn you saw a hint of a smile creeping up onto his face and he looked around the whole room.

He scanned the tables to see if any other friends of yours stayed over the holidays or if maybe there were none, leaving you with no other choice but to sit with him. Upon noticing Chiara and Jae a bit further away he turned back around lifted one eyebrow, acknowledging, and took a sip of his coffee.

Suddenly, you became painfully aware that the last time you properly spend time together, with just the two of you, was during the outdoor festival. And there you were, sitting side by side, doing something so casual and everyday as having breakfast.

It was also uncommon for you to see Talbott out of his school robes. He had this magical talent of looking good in just about anything. He was wearing a pair of dark jeans and a plain turtleneck, his hair, as always, smart and neat and just the right amount of messy.

“Aren’t you eating?” he called you out with a bit of a smirk, not gracing you with a glance, and got back to his own food.

With a guilty blush and no confidence to strike up a further conversation, you focused on your breakfast.

“So how are you doing lately?” he asked after a few minutes, having finished eating, and sipped on the rest of his coffee slowly.

“Uh, alright. Considering everything,” you answered and he nodded slowly. “You?”

He shrugged his shoulders with an indifferent expression, “As per usual. So what made you stay at school this year? Your mum away..?” he inquired.

“Eeh… irrelevant,” you tried to dismiss the question.

“Ooh-kaay…” Talbott replied.

“Do you have any plans?” you asked quickly.

“Uhh… I was going to just read for a bit..?”

“Great! And in general, for the holidays?” you questioned further.

“Y/N, where are you going with this?” he asked, puzzled.

You mustered up all your courage for the moment you’ve been waiting for since you told your head of the house you’d be staying in the castle for the holidays.

“I thought we could spend Christmas together,” you started, taking Talbott by surprise.

“Y/N, do I look like a Christmas person to you?” he asked after a second.

You looked him up and down, “Very much so.”

He sighed deeply and leaned his elbows on the table, hiding his face in his hands. You knew he was debating it and you almost had him on board.

“Aww, come on, Tal! It’ll be fun!” You shook him by the shoulders, making him groan.

“I swear, you’ll be the death of me,” he said and you tried to tame the grin on your face and the butterflies in your stomach.

After finishing your food you rushed to your dorm to owl Rowan as quickly as possible.

——————⁛⁙⁘◊⁘⁙⁛——————

“Do you like snow?” you questioned after you went outside into the grounds.

Talbott chuckled, “Who do you take me for? I’m not that much of a bore, am I?” he teased you.

“No, I just…” you mumbled.

“Although it does get in the way when you try to fly during a snowfall…” he cut you off, walking a bit further, and crouched down, facing away from you.

It took you a second to realize what he was doing. You looked around, trying to find cover and ducked, but it was too late, you got hit with a snowball.

If you weren’t so focused on getting revenge, which turned into a full snow fight, maybe you’d take some time to admire him. The way little snowflakes rested on his hair, how his eyes looked when he focused or how bright he was smiling.

“Alright, alright, I surrender!” Talbott put his hands up and you felt relief, as you were starting to get tired, but you didn’t have it in you to give in first.

“Don’t mess with the curse-breaker, Winger,” you said in playful smugness, walking out from behind your cover and up to him.

“Yeah, yeah…” he started, “go inside or you’ll freeze, you’re covered in snow” he brushed some of it off your shoulder, and you were glad you had already been blushing from the cold.

——————⁛⁙⁘◊⁘⁙⁛——————

“On the Christmas morning Jacob and I used to wake up to a pile of presents at the foot the bed each,” you started, “I always loved Christmas. But after he disappeared things at home changed. I know mum is trying, but it’s difficult sometimes, especially during the holidays…” You reminisced, looking down at your hands wrapped around a mug of hot chocolate.

“My mum really liked Christmas,” Talbott said, “She’d always get so into it, with the decorations, she used to make them herself, too… and she’d sing to me. I don’t think my dad was as much into it, but he tried to keep up for her,” he smiled a little wider to himself. “It was really nice,” he confided.

Your heart ached for the boy next to you. After he had to go through so much, you deeply wished to make it your mission, to bring as much happiness to his life as you could, even if to brighten it up just a little.

“So you don’t hate Christmas after all, huh..?” you said quietly.

He answered after a moment, “No, not Christmas itself.”

“I was hoping I could make it a little bit better. Maybe show you that it can still be nice,” you confessed.

He looked up at you, “That’s… Y/N, I don’t know what to say,” he trailed off.

Unsure of where to go from there either, you took one of his hands in yours.

“Y/N,” he softly prompted you to look up at him.

His face was close to yours and he glanced between your eyes and your lips, silently asking for permission. You inched a bit closer and he closed the distance, cupping your cheek with his hand.

Unsure at first, he relaxed after a second and you melted into him. His lips were really soft and warm an you placed your hands on his shoulders. You could smell his perfume mixed with his natural smell, the smell you adored, and which brought you comfort. Talbott kissed you tenderly and you felt absolutely ecstatic, sure that if he weren’t holding onto you, you’d collapse.

He pulled away only slightly and rested his forehead on yours.

“Merry Christmas, Y/N,” he whispered.

“Merry Christmas, Talbott.”

#hphm #talbott winger #talbott winger x reader #talbott x mc #hphm talbott #hphm imagine

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perfumeofficial · 2 years

Text

PLASMA real time reactions.....

thoughts prior to listening:

ok let's go

Plasma: cool :) i don't know it's neat. hope it doesn't overall harm the album to have this 80s(???) spacey kind of sound in only some of the songs (flashbacks to cosmic explorer)

Time warp vee one point one: WHY start the album with that awkward unimpactful transition and this mediocre song. i like the po.. popopo in this song though. i can recognize this version is slightly different but not in a way that makes me care about it. probably the worst choice for the first song on an album (excluding the intro) ever, or maybe tied with love the world on triangle.

Polygon wave original mix: i like this song! among the best songs they've released post-level3. never noticed the extremely deep bass beneath the more noticeable bassline. the vocal choppy section feels very tacked on but i still like it. polygon waaaaaaae.... this would be a great song to show to other people to be like this is the music i listen to :) if the music video wasn't shit

Saisei: yes this is another one of the best songs since level3, no that does not mean it fits after polygon wave. i don't try to get my hopes up but it's still surprising how nonsensical ystk's track orders are every time. the buzzy bass is soo good. i always wonder how i would feel about perfume albums if i didn't already know which songs were singles. if i hadn't heard any of these songs before this would be an incredible album but so far there's been basically nothing new so it's just like here's 2 great songs and 1 boring one you already know.

Spinning World: love this song too. i didn't like how it started with the awkward spoken line but within the album i think that was a nice transition. so far this is a very funky album i like it. not funky as in funky but you know what i mean. i especially appreciate how the songs seem to have a lot more intricate details which were to some extent missing in futchure pop. do NOT like how the song just fades out. bad way to end a good song

Mawarukagami: first time listening to this song lol. oh wait no it's not i watched a video of it once. the bassline right after the chorus kind of sounds like the polygon wave bassline which was already... you know. and the guitar(?) during the second verse sounds very much like time warp. not necessarily a bad thing except it sounds too much like kyary. IT'S OVER?? ok. not a bad song but kind of forced emotional/fake deep

Flow: again how is this song even less interesting than time warp. honestly if it hadn't been a single this would've been a decent enough album track but i resent it for being a single. maybe it's my own problem that my enjoyment of songs depends on the context of their release but i don't think that's unique to me. this song sounds like it was made around the same time as nax7iro (thank god that's not on this album). here's a list of everything new this song brings to the table that we haven't heard before on some other song: . the joke is it's nothing

Mugen Loop: i kind of hated this song at first but i have since awoken. it sounds like ystk was having fun on this song. i like the kind of shift in tone halfway through and the slight evil circus sound through the whole thing.

Drive'n the Rain why is it spelled like that: the synths sound very harsh at points. not much to say i don't think i will have the urge to listen to this very often but not bad. this sure as hell does not need to be 6 minutes. that guitar during the bridge was very unusual for perfume and not really in a good way. next song please

Hatenabito: literally nothing to say this sounds like it will be on a level of irrelevancy similar to like. tokimeki lights

Android&: on the polygon wave EP i thought this song sounded kind of basic but after those last two songs i'm thankful for something fun.

Sayonara Plastic World: actually first time listening to this. is that melody supposed to sound like time warp.? idk if i'm just tired and ready for the album to be over buuuuut not getting a lot from this. a significant number of songs on this album (oh the song is over ok that was a completely bizarre way to end the album) had kind of uninteresting melodies so i was thankful whenever they stopped singing and there was some kind of synth solo

Overall:

-reminds me of JPN in the sense that there are a lot of single songs and not much new stuff, and in the sense there is no hard song like game/edge/party maker/story/fusion. and i already typed this earlier but again it kind of sucks i can't appreciate the album for the songs themselves as much just because i know they were released previously as singles but i can't help it. i think this effect lessens the more i listen though so i might start to like it more

-the new songs other than spinning world were very uninteresting

-after first listen i would put this album obviously above cosmic explorer and maybe equal to future pop. the best songs on this album are definitely better than the best of FP and there are more of them, but FP felt very cohesive and to the point, which i appreciate even if the point that album was trying to make was kind of mediocre.

-i think mawaru kagami completely killed the vibe and it didn't recover for the rest of the album, RIP

-feels like i got essentially no new perfume content that i care about through this album. spinning world should count but it was released before the album actually came out sooo

-the album has its issues but overall i think Nonaka Miki from Morning Musume did an impressive job taking over as perfume's producer after nakata yasutaka's tragic accident

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turtle-steverogers · 3 years

Text

Team Bonding

fr when was the last time i posted like,,, a fic on here. like a tumblr fic. damn. anyway. ummmmmmmm this is just your.... typical steve freaks out and the avengers are awesome um yah ok ok

warnings: panic attack, vomiting (basically steve watches the titanic and doesnt have a very fun time)

word count: 2575

If Steve was being brutally honest with himself, he was fucking tired of hearing about “the classics”. Irrelevant people butting their noses into his business, tipping him off to what movies were, “the best of the best!” and “absolute must sees!” He appreciated what they were trying to do, but after a while, it felt like people were more or less just trying to garner a slice of his 21st century experience, and quite frankly, he liked doing things better by himself. It was much more appealing to park himself in front of his laptop, nothing but his own quietude to keep him company as he combed through different wikipedia rabbit holes and caught up on movies and TV shows that were apparently crucial to his very existence.

Most were subpar and honestly, he preferred the copious amounts of popcorn he treated himself to on these solo date nights, but some things surprised him. Like Indiana Jones. He liked Indiana Jones. He was neat, and Marion reminded him vaguely of Peggy.

Still, he supposed he should have seen it coming when Clint came to collect him from his floor one evening, that sort of eager-puppy energy he carried around with him vaguely prickling the back of Steve’s neck.

“C’mon, man,” he was saying. Steve leaned against the door jamb, tired. He was going to concede, but Clint was rambling and Steve knew better than to interrupt him. “It’s, like, certifiably the best love story ever. You need to watch it--”

And there it was again. That fucking claim. You need to watch this! You haven’t seen that?

No. He hadn’t. He’d been a little busy, you know, being dead.

“--And the acting is all so raw and it’s just-- Leo DiCaprio-- you know who that--”

“--Yes. I saw Blood Diamond--”

“--Oh, you did? Well, anyway, he rocks in this and--”

“Clint,” Steve cut him off smoothly. “I’ll come, don’t sweat it too hard.”

Clint looked positively elated. “You will?” he exclaimed. “Awesome, yeah, it’s gonna be the whole team. I mean, that’s good right? You’re cool with that? You gotta be, you’re the one who mentioned team bonding that one time--”

“Yes,” Steve cut in again. “I’m alright with that. Give me a minute to change, and I’ll be right down?” He was still in his gym clothes from two hours ago. He meant to take a shower, but he’d sort of… ran out of energy. The sweat had cooled by now anyway. He smelled fine.

“Oh! Yeah, no problem.”

Which was how Steve found himself in a pair of sweatpants and an old SHIELD t-shirt, squashed in between Natasha and Bruce on the communal couch. Someone had handed him a huge bowl of popcorn and Steve was pleasantly surprised to find that it was flavored with some sort of cheese powder.

“White cheddar,” Bruce said, holding up a little blue shaker bottle when he heard Steve’s appreciative hum. “They’re, uh, sort of like seasoning, but for popcorn specifically. They come in all different kinds of flavors.”

“Oh, neat,” Steve said, around another handful of popcorn. He liked Bruce. He seemed to get Steve in that quiet, brutally raw sort of way. A quiet kinship. They didn’t talk about it, but he never made him feel condescended, so Steve decided that was okay.

“I think I fixed it!” Tony said, stepping out from behind the ginormous movie screen where, presumably, he’d been fixing a volume problem. The screen had been frozen on the first frame of the movie for nearly ten minutes. “Okay, okay, let’s see…” he pressed play. Music poured through the speakers on either side of the TV, loud enough so that everyone cringed and Steve nearly dropped the popcorn bowl in his haste to cover his ears. He always managed to forget how damn loud the world could be when he let himself get comfortable.

“Sorry, sorry!” Tony hissed, turning the volume down to a much more tolerable level. “Okay, there. Okay, shh everyone. Gotta let Capsicle--”

“--Just Steve, Tony--”

“--Gotta let Just Steve get the full experience.”

Steve rolled his eyes, but settled in to watch.

The film was honestly better than Steve had been expecting, if not a little… itchy in that way period films tended to be for him. The themes of poverty and love were pretty well-rounded, but they hit just close enough that he almost cringed at the far-fetch’d beauty of it.

Still, his fingers itched for a pencil as Jack guided a pencil over the worn sheaf of paper. The dim light, the faint scratch of the pencil, the forbidden love. It was familiar. Steve could almost smell the salty City air, afternoons spent under the dim lights of candles so they could see even with the curtains drawn-- a semblance of privacy amongst the compact vulnerability of his and Bucky’s shitty little tenement.

Draw me like one of your french girls, Rose had said, and Steve’s eyes drifted towards the wall, Bucky’s voice echoing through his head.

“‘Course I want you to draw me. I ain’t denying my vanity, Stevie,” he teased, but his eyes were soft. “Pal, you could draw a stick of butter and I’d still wanna watch. It ain’t about me here.”

There was a soft touch to his arm and Steve blinked out of his reverie. Natasha was watching him, a neutral look on her face that Steve had finally learned to recognize as concern. He shook his head minutely, offering her a smile. She nodded and looked back at the TV.

The rest of the movie passed without much excitement. The acting was pretty good and Steve had even gotten to a point where he could recognize the filmmaking as something like revolutionary for the time it came out. He was quicker on the cultural uptake than people gave him credit for, but that was neither here nor there. He laughed with everyone else, let himself grow somber when the atmosphere lent that mood, and generally, it was a nice time. He hadn’t gone to any movie nights before this, but he thought maybe he’d start going to more.

And then the ship hit the iceberg.

Steve wasn’t sure what he’d been expecting. Obviously, he knew of the Titanic-- he knew, historically, what happened to it. But for some reason, it hadn’t quite hit him while watching the movie that he was going to have to see the catastrophe go down.

There was a loud creaking of ice on metal as the collision occurred on screen and Steve felt himself go still-- body rigid and tense as the deafening noise played through the speakers. His heart slammed in his chest and he felt his palms start to sweat. He knew that sound-- he knew that--

--He blinked, shaking his head. Movie. Watch the movie. There was a panicked scramble on screen. Characters rushing to amend the situation, more metal creaking and groaning and breaking as dark, foamy water broke through the sides of the ship and Steve could taste it, he could taste the water flooding into the cabin, hitting him from the left as it took the plane down in a harsh--

--He twitched, shaking his head. He was being silly. There were moments of reconciliation as the scenes rapidly flashed between water flooding the ships cabins and peaceful moments of civility. A calm before the storm. A final dance before death.

I’m gonna need a raincheck on that dance…

There was a sudden crash as water blasted through into the work quarters and Steve jumped, watching transfixed as unforgiving torrents pushed workers over, flooding them, drowning them, and they were falling, slipping, sliding, panicking as certain death met them at the halfway point, and Steve knew it must be cold. So cold. Suffocating and unforgiving as it flooded their lungs, saltier than they probably imagined, heavy and awful and--

“Stark, turn the movie off.”

The room went abruptly silent. Steve realized his eyes were closed, chest heaving as he sat, hunched over his lap, hands fisted in his hair.

The popcorn wasn’t on his lap anymore. When had he moved? He couldn’t breathe and he was so cold and someone needed to save those guys, someone needed to--

“Steve,” a gentle voice cut into the roaring waves crashing in his head. Bruce. That was Bruce speaking. “Can you hear me, Steve?”

Steve nodded, pulling his hair harder. He couldn’t breathe. Was he drowning again? Surely that was impossible. If Bruce was talking to him, he couldn’t be drowning again, but-- but the water-- and-- and the cold--

“Good, that’s good, Steve,” Bruce. Bruce again. It was Bruce. “Can I touch you?”

Touch. Touch. No touch. He was so cold. He wanted to stop being cold, but he was certain if someone touched him right now, he would lose his goddamn mind. More so than he already had.

“That’s alright,” Bruce sounded steady. Calm. So calm. Why couldn’t Steve calm down? “That’s okay. You think you can do something for me?”

Something… for Bruce? Could he? Could he do anything right then? If he couldn’t breathe, how could he do anything-- and he-- he felt sick--

He opened his mouth to answer and vomited between his feet, straight onto the carpet. Someone in the room hissed sympathetically. Steve wanted to crawl somewhere and die.

“Oh, Steve,” Bruce seemed to be talking mostly to himself, but Steve felt his shoulders climb higher towards his ears. “Okay, Steve, I need you to listen to my voice. Just listen. I’m going to count and you’re going to breathe in time with my instruction, okay? Can you do that for me?”

Steve shook his head, choking on a sob. His chest hurt. Like someone had taken all of his ribs and replaced them with weights, flooding his lungs with-- with water-- and fuck, now he was thinking about the plane again. He felt his breathing tick up higher.

“I want you to try,” Bruce said. “With me. In,” he sucked in a breath. “One… two… three… four…”

Steve tried to suck in a breath, but all he managed to do was send himself into a coughing fit. Bruce kept counting. Steve wanted to tell him to wait-- slow down-- shut up--

He braced a hand over his chest.

Bruce was still counting.

He wasn’t sure how much time passed, but eventually he found himself matching Bruce’s counts, eyes closed and the heels of his palms braced on his temples as he sucked in greedy, measured breaths. His heart was still slamming hard enough to make him tremble and he could smell his own sick wafting up from the ground, but at least he was breathing on his own.

Bruce trailed off. Silence hung thick in the air, the only noise Steve’s slow, shaking breaths. Shame burned around his ears. He didn’t dare look up.

Tony, predictably, was the one to break the silence. “I’m sorry, Steve,” he said, and Steve was surprised to hear honest regret in his voice. “I was the one who suggested we watch Titanic. I should have thought for more than two seconds about that…”

Steve shrugged. Embarrassment climbed from his stomach to his throat, threatening to choke him.

Natasha spoke next. “Why don’t you go wash up?” It was an escape-- a way out-- and Steve took it graciously, keeping his head ducked down as he stood on shaking legs and rushed to the communal bathroom.

Inside, he locked the door and braced himself over the sink, splashing warm water on his face. He drank greedily from the tap. His reflection looked like shit-- he’d burst some blood vessels in his eyes, probably while vomiting, and his skin looked sallow and pale. He was trembling, sweat matting his hair to his forehead. He looked how he looked after a nightmare. This, he supposed, had kind of been like a nightmare. Though, he hadn’t been asleep.

Nightmares, he was finding, weren’t strictly exclusive to the nighttime.

He supposed he’d always known that, though.

He closed his eyes, bowing his head again.

His emotions had been fucked to high hell since waking up from the ice. This hadn’t been the first of those awful… fits, and he was certain it wouldn’t be the last, but to have something like that happen in front of the team was a whole new level of mortifying. Fuck. He’d gotten sick. And he’d left it.

He felt the ceramic counter straining under his grip. Scowling, he let go.

He could slip off to his room, lock himself away until he could find some way to sneak out of the Tower and never talk to any of the others ever again. Even in this state, Steve knew that wasn’t viable in any sense. He sighed. Besides, he couldn’t just damn the others to clean up his mess.

Stowing his pride, he dug some spare mouthwash out from behind the mirror and chugged some straight down, keeping a mouthful and swishing it around before spitting it in the sink. He still felt and looked like shit, but at least his breath would smell like wintergreen.

The others were still gathered in the communal living room, watching what looked like a kid’s cartoon on TV. There was a distinct smell of cleaner in the air and Steve’s eyes landed on the ground where he’d gotten sick. It was clean. He let his eyes drop to the ground, ashamed.

“I’m sorry,” he said. The cartoon paused. He didn’t look at any of them. “I was going to clean up.”

“Nah, man, the only thing worse than freaking out is having to clean up after yourself while you still feel shitty,” Clint said, and Steve looked up. There was no pity in his gaze, only understanding.

“Yeah, we’ve all been there,” Tony said. “Sucks, but hey, least we know now that Titanic is a no-no for you.”

Steve flushed, swallowing a few times. “Um, I guess,” he looked at Bruce. “Thank you.”

Bruce smiled. “No problem,” he said gently. “We’re watching Phineas and Ferb if you’d like to join us, but we understand if you’d like to go rest.”

“Phineas and Ferb?” Steve asked, guilt replaced with genuine confusion.

“Yeah,” Clint said, shoving a handful of popcorn in his mouth. “It’s my go-to when I have a bad day. Nothing like some good old platypus drama to cure life’s woes.”

Steve blinked. “I genuinely don’t know what to say to that.”

Clint barked out a laugh. “Join us, man! Don’t gotta talk if you’re not feeling it, but being alone after shit like that sucks.”

And Steve hadn’t had someone there for him after a breakdown-- not since the war. Not since Bucky. Every ounce of him wanted to run. Hide. Smooth out his face and slip on that mask of stoicism. But maybe… maybe he didn’t have to. Maybe he could let himself have this, if only this once.

“Sure,” he said, voice a little hoarse. He awkwardly sat back in between Natasha and Bruce.

Tony pressed play again and Steve smoothed his hands over his thighs, feeling out of place and a little cramped and--

Natasha settled, casually letting her feet rest on his lap. On his other side, Bruce leaned into his shoulder, a subtle, grounding pressure. Clint caught his eye and offered him some more popcorn.

Steve relaxed.

Yeah. He could let himself have this.

thanks for reading, chiefs

yeah this was chatted about in one of the awesome discord groups im in so thanks guyysss lol

#marvel shit #marvel #Steve Rogers #marvel fic #steve rogers fic #Avengers #team bonding #yes #avengers fic #i love them all #dlakjfl #ok #crawling back into my hole #im definitely supposed to be doing homework

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onebizarrekai · 4 years

Text

I went on an unfiltered positive soapbox rant in a doc about green oak last night at 1am

please note that I usually post with moderation on my language but this rant does not have this

I have to give you the original. I have to

yo it’s almost 1 in the fucking morning and I played pokemon for 4 fucking hours today and I’m gonna ramble about GARY FUCKING OAK

LISTEN CAREFULLY. ok listen

to start off my ted talk with something partially irrelevant, I cannot get over the fact that green and gary are almost 2 very distinct personalities. they have similarities, but in my head, green has a genuine capacity to be personally malicious, while gary exists for the sole purpose of being as much of a chad as possible

scale of oak: <————————————————> emo bitch smartass tax fraud (manga) (game) (show)

(I haven’t read the manga in like 10 years and I’m having these vague recollections and I’m like whoa god. I forgot that red and green didn’t know each other in the manga they were literally strangers it’s so weird also they were ALL SO YOUNG)

so basically, gary is a hilarious fucking character whom cade (my brother) and I have distorted beyond belief by making him a rich snob and making endless tax history jokes, and green oak, green fucking oak, is a much more elaborate human being.

real character development as a real life person is growing up and realizing that green is your favorite pokemon character, and not just because he’s comically an asshole and easily mockable, it’s also because he goes through so much fucking implicit character development and it’s VERY IMPORTANT AND COOL.

call it extra and biased but fuck off. no character in pokemon has ever gotten more character development than green oak, and not seeing any of it happen on screen is actually really interesting.

pokemon isn’t generally about character development beyond the dialogue you see on the screen. I mean, apparently it’s little enough about the story that sword and shield completely bailed on the idea of actually having a fucking story, even though sun and moon had a pretty decent one. ANYWAY, green oak is such a fucking cool character because there’s so much room for speculation, and I’m gonna go on a list of reasons why everything about this is neat.

1. he is the only character whom you actually see change in a pokemon game off camera and between long timespans, to my recollection. the only thing to compare this to is the transition between the two fifth gen stories, and while my memory is foggy since I only played black 2 once, I don’t remember any of the characters in that game changing much at all. maybe cheren became less of a dick, whatever. no one cares because he has absolutely no subtext.

2. red is the only protagonist in pokemon history who has made a second appearance. red is a real fucking person, a real pokemon character, and isn’t just a convenient fill-in for the player who gets thrown away after the game is over (LOOKING AT YOU, BLACK 2 AND WHITE 2). green’s relationship to red, no matter how damaged, is a real thing, and a real story element. this is never done in any other pokemon game. green is the only rival whose story continues after the game is over because his counterpart continues to exist.

3. the context of the game. after green barreled through the entirety of kanto, talking red down all the while, and then becoming champion, he gets beaten by red once and for all and his dream of being champion is torn right out of his hands moments after being obtained. everything green cared about is taken away from him by the person he was always mean to. karma, bitch.

so green becomes the 8th gym leader. it doesn’t take two moments of thinking about this to understand how much he doesn’t want this. it’s like, settling for 6th best after your dream job falls through, since nobody knows how the structure of the elite four works.

to top it all off, red RUNS THE FUCK AWAY TO A GODFORSAKEN MOUNTAIN. he takes everything away from green, shatters his world, and then won’t even take the dream that green wanted. can you imagine how mad he’d be about that? green is already having an existential crisis about his behavior problems, he doesn’t need this fucking bullshit. somehow lance becomes the new champion meanwhile even though he’s an elite four member. you’d think green would at least take his place, or something. the amount that I’m confused about this is probably also applies to green. there’s a chance that green rejected the position of champion due to being defeated by red right away, and all the shame he got, but even so, it undoubtably would have taken a toll on him.

finally, here’s the kicker. in spite of all this, green doesn’t make it his business to end the world or some shit. in spite of this, he becomes a better person. green fucking oak has a fucking soul. also, it’s been a VERY long time since I’ve played all of soulsilver, but does green ever complain about red being isolated on mt silver? maybe that’s wishful thinking.

final bout: after years and years, green and red arrive in alola together as grownass men. red came down from the fucking mountain, and green is the one he came to the islands with. this implication of reconcile is so FUCKING IMPORTANT because of what these two have been through for like, the last 20 years.

you cannot POSSIBLY look at this like it’s not a big deal. like, they didn’t just “grow up and get over it.” red had to kick green aside to become the champion (which is still such a fucking good conclusion for the game, like, thinking back on it having a rival who’s a dick to you for the whole game and then destroying his life is grimly poetic), RAN AWAY TO A MOUNTAIN and gave up the title, indicating to green that it didn’t even matter to him (whether he meant that or not, whatever, running away to a mountain is fucking stupid), and in spite of all this, they ended up reconciling. they reconciled. green could have been mad at red for the rest of his life for destroying his dream, regardless of how he treated red when they were younger. maybe green figured that he still had a shot at becoming champion again, but maybe that’s the point. he continues to want to be stronger than red but doesn’t let it carry into how he treats people anymore.

I’m curious, though. what really happened? did red and green put it all behind them? did they deem there someone to blame? did red just become the champion to get back at green after all, and then ran away because he didn’t know how to live with it? or did he run away because it truly didn’t matter to him? or did red become the champion purely out of his own self goals and wasn’t even thinking about green? if so, why did he run away? so many things to think about.

anyway, tldr, green has been through more character development than any other pokemon character and I adore him

also. where the fuck is gold. he defeated red and then ceased to exist

update: in heartgold and soulsilver, green doesn’t seem to know where red is, but in some of his dialogue over call, he tells you that you “remind him of someone” and he mumbles dejectedly about red before hanging up

#fuck count: 28 #I've read too many fics about green going up to mt silver and trying to get red to come back down #random stuff #pokemon #green oak #tfw green oak is your favorite pokemon character #and you realize it's not just because he's comically mean #I've played firered so many times #my brother in law is playing it and like #I realized I know so much about this game #so now I'm playing it again #namelessshipping #because I'm biased

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themurphyzone · 3 years

Text

Nova Ch 10

AN: I think that reunion with Snowball went pretty well!

Ch 10: White Dwarves

AO3 Link, FFN Link

Terran Date 2015.4.26

I’m stuck in a backwater lab with an idiot who believes you can transform a rock into gold by spray painting it. Nothing else worth reporting.

o-o-o-o-o

Pinky winced as Brain slammed his hand against the computer mouse, saving the oddly brief recording to the computer. He didn’t bother with his usual sign-off either. Just buried his face between his hands and growled to himself.

Brain had been in a foul mood ever since the tea party, snapping whenever Pinky tried to ask a question and making messes without bothering to clean up after himself. He wasn’t the only one affected by Snowball suddenly leaving. Madame Daisy was still pretty miffed about Snowball’s lack of etiquette when he didn’t say goodbye to the other guests or say thank you to the host. And Brain hadn’t done those either.

Maybe Pinky should’ve warned them about Madame Daisy being a stickler for tea party etiquette.

But more importantly, the deadline for RSVPing was tomorrow at 8 pm and they still hadn’t called Lamont Manor. More than once, Pinky brought it up in conversation and left post-it notes as reminders, but Brain always shut the topic down and shredded the notes into confetti.

It stung when he did that, but Pinky shook it off and saved the itty-bitty scraps. One never knew when they’d need good confetti.

Pinky’s ears twitched towards the cage at the sound of Brain’s groan. Brain had already drained a full water bottle and was steadily working his way through a second. While Pinky was happy his alien friend had gotten used to water, mostly so they could play Marco Polo and waterski with popsicle sticks, maybe there was such a thing as too much water.

“Brain?” Pinky called, nearly slipping on a puddle. He frowned. There were several puddles and no sign of Brain at least trying to keep this side of the cage neat. “Er, don’t you think that’s enough? Awfully hard to sleep if you have to keep getting up for the bathroom.”

“Just leave me alone,” Brain muttered. He sipped from the tube again without taking his glare off Pinky. Water dribbled down his chin.

No, he was absolutely not leaving Brain alone! Pinky stomped his foot, startling Brain when he tried to sneak another drink.

“That’s it!” Pinky shouted. He tugged his ears and released them with a sharp snap. “I’m gonna give you tough love whether you like it or not, mistah!”

Before Brain could react, Pinky snatched him away from the water bottle and tucked him under one arm like he was cradling a football. Brain kicked and squirmed in his grip, trying to smack him with his tail, but Pinky had a firm hold. With his free hand, he pulled a fedora off the coat rack as he marched out of the cage and over to the stereo.

It was a little worn from age, but it still worked alright.

He dropped Brain, who let out a little oomph when his stomach hit the counter. Smacking the play button with his foot, Pinky kept one hand on his fedora as he counted the beats until the main melody began.

“Just say narf! Just say narf!

Don’t you know to be glad? Just say narf!

Every day is a joy and so-”

The music shut off.

Surprised by the lack of background music, Pinky checked behind him, arms still thrown above his head with the fedora hanging from one hand.

Brain stood in front of the stereo, his hand over the stop button. “Just what in Orion’s belt are you trying to accomplish with this display?” he snapped, crossing his arms.

“You’ve been a grumpasaurus rex ever since the tea party! So I’m cheering you up with one of my favorite songs!” Pinky protested.

“You can’t cheer me up by manhandling me and saying nonsense!” Brain yelled.

“I said narf, not nonsense!”

“They’re synonymous!”

“No, they’re not! They agreed they could date other people and they still have a trusting relationship! And you wanna know what else? They actually clean up after themselves too!”

“GAH!”

“TROZ!”

Their noses were just a few inches apart, chests huffing and puffing like they were about to blow the Three Little Pigs’ houses down. Brain broke away from the staredown first, clasping his hands behind his back as he sulked.

Pinky counted one Mississippi, five Mississippis, and seventeen Mississippi’s, his hand against his racing heart as he breathed in and out to calm down. And why did they only count Mississippi? Why not Alabama, Georgia, or Papua New Guinea?

Brain was a closed book at the best of times, it seemed. One of those heavy textbooks with lots of big words, not a happy, colorful picture book like Pat the Bunny.

But he wasn’t a good actor, though he pretended to be above happiness, fear, and sorrow.

“You know you can talk to me, right? About your feelings or world domination or secret crushes. Anything you want,” Pinky said, wringing his tail in his hands. It looked like a very sad, wiggling worm under his fingers. The smooth surface under his fingers helped a little, but it didn’t replace a full snout hug from Pharfignewton. “I...I was just trying to help.”

“World domination is the only topic worth discussing out of everything you said. Emotions are irrelevant,” Brain said. There was still a bite in his tone, but not much. He rubbed his arm, feet shuffling uncomfortably. “So you were truthful about wanting to...assist during my period of inactivity?”

Pinky tilted his head. “Why would I lie about wanting to help? That would be mean, Brain.”

“Helping is just another way of ensuring someone owes a favor. Or it would be mutually beneficial to all parties involved,” Brain replied. His sharp gaze snapped back to Pinky. “Our deal is just one example out of many.”

“What about helping you cause I wanted you to feel better?”

Didn’t that count? He didn’t know why Brain was making it all so complicated.

“As I stated before, your song was nonsense and your method was invasive.” Brain shot a disdainful glare at the stereo. “But I can’t entirely fault you for your intentions, however misguided, though I suggest having a concrete reward in mind next time.”

Pinky grinned and let go of his tail. “Oh, that’s easy! Lemme grab a chunk of concrete off the street!”

Brain sighed, stomping over to a top drawer, perching on the edge of the counter as he slid it open. “That won’t be necessary, Pinky.”

“Looking for something, Brain?” Pinky asked.

“I can find it on my own!” Brain tried to wave him off, but overbalanced and fell into the open drawer, landing on his stomach with a muffled oomph. He spat a scrap of paper out of his mouth, kicking a red pen aside as he rolled onto his back.

Pinky’s fingers drummed on the counter as he peered down at Brain. A light cherry color coated his sagging cheeks.

“I’d rather direct my focus somewhere else for the time being.” Brain wasn’t making eye contact with Pinky. Which was a shame, because his eyes were the prettiest shade of pink. “I don’t require anything else after you point me to the cleaning supplies.”

Pinky blinked at him in surprise, but they were getting somewhere now! He could do a cartwheel, kiss a cockatoo, and dance the Macarena! Maybe not in that order, or all at once, but there’s a first time for everything!

A smile spread across Pinky’s face, and he couldn’t help but laugh when Brain’s head began to resemble a lumpy tomato.

o-o-o-o-o

Several hours later, Pinky yawned as the first rays of sunlight gently crept across the bed. The distant sounds of cars caught in traffic on the nearby bridge combined with the gentle thrum of lab technology formed the usual background noises, greeting him with a new day. Freeing his legs and tail from the blanket, he dipped into a luxurious, catlike stretch, arching his back and raising his rear end and tail as high as they would go.

“Wakey-wakey, Brain! Narf!” Pinky exclaimed as he shook Brain’s shoulder.

Brain mumbled to himself and buried his head into his pillow, curling into a very tight cocoon to block out the light. If Brain wanted to hatch into a pretty butterfly, he needed all the rest he could get, so Pinky left him alone.

But it was worth a shot, even if Brain wasn’t a morning mouse.

Pinky ate a plateful of food pellets for a quick breakfast, then washed it down with water. The area around the water bottle was puddle-free and mostly clean, save for a stubborn stain on a cage bar by the floor. But that spot gave Pinky plenty of trouble too, so he didn’t hold it against Brain.

He coaxed a drop of water out of the tubing and splashed it on his face, then squeezed through the cage bars, hands behind his back as he strolled over to the cap Snowball had given him.

He’d spent most of his time decorating it with whatever he could find for the past few days. Glittery, colorful letters that spelled Pharfignewton were glued across the brim, give or take a few letters. Her name was so long that it didn’t fit and the ‘ewton’ was on a separate row beneath the rest. Feathers, ribbons, and encouraging messages on sticky notes covered the blue fabric.

It was coming along nicely. Pinky backed up a few steps, sticking out his tongue and placing his fingers together like he was taking a picture.

“Just needs a little something,” Pinky murmured, tapping his chin to get the idea muscle in his head working. It usually worked best after he ate, so coming up with something should be a cinch!

Then he snapped his fingers together, a little lightbulb flickering overhead with a satisfying click. Wait, no, no. That was just the light turning on cause a sleepy scientist trudged in, dragging his feet to the kitchen. He didn’t see Pinky waving good morning to him.

Hopefully the man liked decaf, because they were all out of regular coffee.

Pinky folded red tissue paper into a rose, then repeated the step with purple tissue paper. “Thank you, DIY craft videos on Youtube!” he hummed.

He needed more roses to go all the way around. Kentucky Derby hats were always decked out with pretty roses. Oh, he could arrange the roses into a pretty red-purple-red-purple pattern!

And toss some glitter onto the roses too! Can’t go wrong with glitter!

He dumped a generous amount of pink glitter on his rose and glued it to the hat.

More scientists trickled in, shuffling off to the kitchen in search of coffee and once again ignoring Pinky and his pretty hat. They didn’t seem too keen on coming today. He couldn’t imagine why. Monday was such a lovely day and it never got the appreciation it deserved.

Since they had a bad habit of moving items around so Pinky could never find them, he hid his unfinished hat in the back of a large drawer. Nobody ever looked there anyway.

He hauled himself out of the drawer. As he climbed back to the counter, he paused to admire the calendar picture of Mickey Mouse giving flowers to Minnie. Beneath it, the box for April 27 was circled in glittery blue.

Right, wasn’t there something they were supposed to do today?

RSVP BY 8 PM! NARF!

Right, they still had stuff to do if they were gonna have the best weekend ever! They still had to find costumes for the masquerade ball! Especially the masks! Masks were the most important part!

And they had to call soon, or they wouldn’t be able to go.

“Brain!” Pinky shouted as he ran inside the cage, snatching up the invitation card from the corner. Brain was out of bed and trying to eat a food pellet, though his expression was pinched from the dryness of his breakfast. “Oh, that brand is pretty dry. That’s why I saute it in three-and-one oil first. Anyway, you’re already up?”

Brain scowled and swallowed his morsel with difficulty. “How can I possibly sleep with all this racket?”

A cupboard slammed down the hall, followed by loud profanity that would’ve made Pinky’s grandmother clutch her pearls and faint.

Apparently, nobody wanted decaf.

Pinky held the invitation close to a scowling Brain. “See? We’ve gotta call now or they won’t let us in! Then we won’t be able to swim in the chocolate fountain or admire the ice sculptures!”

Brain shoved the card away from his face. “Heaven forbid we miss those banal activities,” he replied, pressing two hands to his cheeks.

“Exactly!” Pinky’s tail twitched in anticipation. “And we still need fancy outfits and masks!”

Brain took another food pellet, grimaced, and tossed it back into the bowl. Then he sighed and rubbed his temples. “This is a rather asinine plan, Snowball,” he muttered. “Come again?” Pinky asked. He could’ve sworn Brain said Snowball’s name.

Which was weird, because Snowball wasn’t even here. Unless Brain named the food bowl Snowball. That made more sense.

“Never mind, Pinky,” Brain sighed. “Forgive me for my reservations.”

“But we haven’t made those reservations yet,” Pinky said. Brain didn’t reply, too focused on valiantly keeping his breakfast down. Then Brain drank from the water bottle, careful not to splash too much. Once he finished, he headed to the cage door, and Pinky dutifully followed. He hopped from toe to toe as Brain unlocked the door with a bent paper clip. “Can I place the call, Brain?”

“This is a delicate operation, Pinky,” Brain replied. “We must use our given aliases so that we won’t be found out prematurely. I can’t risk you blabbing our true identities, so I’ll speak to our less than gracious host myself. Now, hand over the card.”

It was true.

He wasn’t a good liar at all.

Pinky held out the card, but before Brain could take it, a balding man with a bad combover and rumpled labcoat tried to yank him out of the cage by his crooked tail. The scientist yelped in pain as the orb sparked in his hand, leaving red marks on his skin. Startled, Freed from his grip, Brain leapt forward and tripped over himself. Pinky dropped the card and caught Brain by the shoulders before he could slam nose-first into the metal floor.

The red orbs on Brain’s antennae glowed for several seconds before fading away. Then Brain regained his footing and gave Pinky a brief nod as thanks, quickly pulling away to recollect himself.

The contact ended all too soon.

The man flicked his hand to get rid of the shock, muttering to himself as he pulled on a pair of rubber gloves.

“What’s going on?” Brain snapped. “We have important business to conduct!”

“Don’t worry, Brain. It’s just Maze Monday!” Pinky said, fixing his messy tuft as best he could without a mirror. He had to look his best for maze running! “We’ll call afterward!”

The scientist reached in again. Though Brain defiantly stood in the corner away from him, it was no use and he was pulled out of the cage. He dangled in the scientist’s gloved hand by the tail, grumpy at his current position.

Pinky was next. He swung from the scientist’s other hand as he was lifted into the air, pumping his legs back and forth like he was on an upside down swing. Giggling, he reached out and tried to touch Brain’s ears, though he was several inches short.

With one mouse dangling from each hand, the scientist walked out of the room and carried them down the hallway. They passed the college interns who were more interested in selfies than work, the security guard who was always shouting about evil rodents and their master plan to hoard the world’s entire cheese supply for themselves, and a bored female scientist who looked like she’d rather be anywhere else but here.

The scientist entered a room on his left. Along the wall, several guinea pigs rested in their cages. Pinky waved to them, but since he didn’t have any food, the guinea pigs weren’t interested.

They were dropped at the start of a large cardboard maze. The scientist adjusted the cameras mounted above the maze, then left the room.

Just him and Brain now.

“Your scientists display a disturbing lack of regard for our tails,” Brain grumbled, rubbing the soreness out of one zigzagged bend. “Not that Selenians were any better.”

“But if they hold the tip just right, you can swing around like a little monkey!” Pinky said. “I mean, my rear gets a bit sore too, and sometimes you might crash into a wall, but it’s still loads of fun! Haven’t you ever tried it, Brain?”

“While that activity is suitable for inane creatures, it doesn’t befit a future world emperor to behave in such an embarrassing manner.” Brain dusted off his jumpsuit, though it was recently washed and wasn’t particularly dirty. “But I digress. We must focus on surviving this perilous maze so that we may RSVP to the event in time.”

Perilous?

But he didn’t see any pearls anywhere. It was just cardboard and metal as far as the eye could see. Pearls would’ve brightened this drab maze a lot.

There were four directions to pick from. Pinky scratched his head. Which one?

The left path looked fun, but the one behind and in front were dimly lit. Which left the right path. And since it was right, that meant it was the right way!

“Let’s go! The right path is always right! Zort!” Pinky exclaimed. He walked to the right path, but Brain hauled him back by the elbow.

“Don’t assume the direction and the certainty of success are one and the same, Pinky,” Brain said firmly. “We have to take precautions.”

Pinky didn’t think they had to be careful though. There wasn’t anyone else here. Unless the guinea pigs counted, but they weren’t in the maze.

His usual strategy was to run around silly-willy until he found the snack at the end. But in all his years, he’d never actually found the snack. Usually he just ran into walls and daydreamed about cheese until a nice scientist got him out.

And cheese kept the spookiness away.

“There’s nobody here but us,” Pinky said.

“There’s nobody visible in this maze but us,” Brain corrected. “If we’re not careful, we could fall victim to traps. Enough arguing, Pinky. We’re taking the left fork.”

There weren’t any forks to take, nor anything to eat using a fork, but at least Brain was nice enough to drag Pinky down his second choice instead of the dimly lit paths.

Brain stuck close to the walls, grabbing Pinky’s wrist to ensure he did the same. As they came upon a T-section where they could either turn left or right, Brain carefully held his antennae back with his free hand and poked his head around the corner. Pinky tried to lean over Brain to see what was so interesting, but a sharp nudge kept him back.

“Whatcha looking for?” Pinky asked. “Besides cardboard.”

“Bright, confined areas are the safest,” Brain said. “It’s not a complete guarantee, but you can at least watch for disturbances on the floor or wall. We’ll head right. I can’t see the end of the left corridor from here.”

He let go of Pinky’s wrist, but gave him stern instructions to stay along the wall. It was just like giving the wall a really long hug, and Pinky licked the wall to thank it for hugging back.

Huh. So cardboard tastes like cardboard then. Not bad, but it could definitely use some parsley.

Halfway down the corridor, Brain’s breath suddenly hitched. He stared at the floor in front of them, where one edge of the cardboard was a little higher than the other. The line spanned the entire length between the two walls.

“Don’t get too close,” Brain said, pushing Pinky back before he could step on it. “Remember, strange patterns in the structure might reveal the location of a trap.”

It looked like a normal ledge though. Completely harmless.

But if the trap only worked when they stepped on it...then the trick was to not step on it!

Brain let go of Pinky’s wrist as he pondered their next course of action. Taking his chances, Pinky backed up several paces, keeping his eye on the line he couldn’t touch.

Then he sprinted forward, ignoring Brain’s shout for him to stop.

Pinky leapt as high as he could, easily clearing the line. Though he couldn’t quite stick the landing and toppled forward as soon as he touched the ground.

Still had to work on his weak ankles.

Hopping to his feet, Pinky turned to a flabbergasted Brain. Ha! He loved that word. Flabbergasted! Too bad it was a bit long for a catchphrase.

Instead of being impressed, Brain glared at him.

“Do you have any idea how dangerous your stunt was?” Brain shouted. “You could’ve been severely incapacitated!”

Pinky stretched his legs to test his ankles, but they felt alright. No harm done.

“Narf! But my ankles are fine! See?” Pinky shook his ankles so Brain could see they weren’t hurt.

“And if there was a motion sensor?” Brain snapped. “Did you consider the possibility of spikes, projectiles, or electrocution?”

“Um…”

The scientists wouldn’t be mean enough to put those in a maze. Of course, sometimes they’d forget to take him out when he couldn’t find the exit, and he’d lay in the maze alone and listen to the lab’s scary nighttime noises, but he’d never seen spikes during these tests before.

“Thought so,” Brain said. There was something odd about the way his hand twitched towards his tail.

Like he had personal experience.

“Have you ever been caught in a trap before?” Pinky asked before he could stop himself.

Too much?

Brain folded his arms and lifted his chin, pink eyes narrowing at Pinky. Probably not then. Brain was too smart for that.

And definitely clever enough to find his way to the exit and not get stuck overnight.

Then Brain turned around so Pinky could see all the zigzags in his tail.

“Electrocution trap,” Brain said, his ears lowering. “An overload of electricity can be fatal for my species, though we’re naturally resistant to smaller shocks. I was...less experienced back then.”

There was more. Brain wasn’t telling him how much it hurt.

But Brain tensed, a silent warning not to push any further.

“They didn’t leave you in the maze overnight, did they?” Pinky asked. Brain went dangerously still.

Oh, there he went running his mouth again! Why couldn’t his mouth be good and stay zipped?

“Sorry, Brain. You don’t have to answer. It’s fine, really!” Pinky hastily corrected himself. “But if they did-”

"No, they didn't," Brain said, surprising Pinky with how much he was revealing. "They kept a strict count of all their test subjects, and preserving them was far more preferable to losing a valuable limited resource. Small mercies, I suppose.”

“Oh. Well...that’s good.” Pinky rubbed the back of his neck. He was glad Brain never had to deal with that. He wouldn’t wish it on anybody, not even that stubborn stain he could never rub out from the cage bars. “Poit.”

Brain turned back to Pinky and looked at the line between them. Then he hopped over it, bracing himself for a shock. When no electricity appeared, he seemed surprised, though he immediately tried to school his expression into a neutral one. He walked past Pinky and refused an invitation to hug it out.

They had to turn left at the next intersection since the right led to a dead end. Then they reached an open room with a cardboard path and a metal path. Brain chose the metal path, but stopped where the rough paper met cool metal. Pinky stopped behind him.

“Pinky?” Brain said. He didn’t turn around. “Were you left in a maze overnight?”

“Sometimes,” Pinky admitted. Was he worrying Brain? He didn’t want Brain to worry! “But it’s not so bad when you imagine all the cheese you’ll eat at the end, even if you never reach it. But cheese keeps the ghosts away, you know. They don’t like the smell.”

If he imagined cheese, he wouldn’t imagine long, crooked witch fingers trying to pluck him out. Or the loud air conditioning system which clicked on and off every few minutes, the ghostly breeze echoing down the hallway. Or how he called for his parents and Sis to come share a yummy feast with him, though they never came.

“That’s horribly negligent on the humans’ end.”

And that was all the talk Brain allowed on the matter.

o-o-o-o-o

The maze was a lot longer than they thought. Just when Pinky believed they’d reached the cheese, there was always some new twist that set them back.

What time was it? Though he couldn’t see the clock, it had to be around lunchtime right now. Pinky’s stomach growled, sounding a lot like Brain in one of his moods.

He’d give an arm and a leg for a few food pellets. Or some cheese. Even a leaf.

Brain was tiring out too. His footsteps were heavier and slower. But he kept at it.

Right, focus on the goal. Focus on the yummy cheese.

What kind would they get? Moldy? Blue? Provolone? All of those sounded pretty good, but Pinky thought his stomach was calling for pepperjack. Oh wait, no, maybe it was gorgonzola.

His stomach grumbled again. Okay, it was definitely muenster this time.

They came across a path with a thick sheet of metal on top. So dark that they couldn’t see a thing in front of them. Brain took a deep breath and stuck a hand in the darkness. They only saw his wrist.

His fingers were completely swallowed by the inky, hungry darkness.

Brain took his hand out.

Oh. Not swallowed then. All his fingers were still there.

“We’ve exhausted all our options,” Brain said, pounding his fist into his hand in determination. But even that gesture couldn’t hide how he stuck to the wall like glue. Pinky didn’t blame him. It was awfully dark in there. What if they went in and were never found again? “Taking this path is absolutely necessary if we’re to make it out of this labyrinth in time.”

But they couldn’t see the traps. It wasn’t safe.

Unless…

“Brain, your orbs!” Pinky exclaimed, gently tapping an antenna. “If you make ‘em glow, we won’t get lost or fall into a trap!”

Brain didn’t look so sure. He rubbed the back of his neck. “Not a terrible suggestion for once, Pinky. Unfortunately, it’s not something I have voluntary control over. It’s a hormonal response that occurs when I’m...well, happy.”

“So we’ll just have to make you happy enough for your orbs to glow,” Pinky said.

With what? Brain raised an eyebrow, the silent question obvious.

Then Pinky snapped his fingers. He knew what to do! He'd sing Just Say Narf!

Except he was trying to make Brain happy, not himself.

A no-go then.

Cream cheese and blueberry bagels? Out of reach.

Pinky tapped his chin. This was harder than he thought.

Brain sat against the wall, eyes squeezed shut and hands rubbing circles into his large forehead. “Statues, parades, my jewel-encrusted cummerbund…” he murmured.

He was doing one of those smartypants things. Too smart for Pinky to understand.

Brain growled and opened his eyes in irritation. “Cease your staring at once, Pinky. I’m trying to concentrate.”

“On what?” Pinky asked.

“World domination of course,” Brain said, smacking his ear like he was dumping extra thoughts out of his chubby head. “Accomplishing a goal would naturally bring anyone contentment.”

Pinky zipped his lip and threw away the key, then sat against the wall across from Brain and waited.

Yet Brain’s orbs didn’t glow.

Pinky drummed his fingers against his leg. When he drummed all the songs he knew, he tried to lick his elbow. Except his elbow didn’t want to be licked. He leaned in and stuck his tongue out as far as he could, but it was a very stubborn elbow.

After an eternity, Brain finally spoke, his voice full of cautious hope. “Are they glowing now?”

Pinky shook his head, and Brain slumped against the wall in defeat.

The clock ticked on.

“There’s gotta be other things you like besides world domination,” Pinky said. It made sense to have a lot of likes and favorites, and not just on social media.

“Those ‘other things’ are frivolous at best and distractions at worst,” Brain replied. “Taking over this world would make me happy, so there’s no logical reason as to why it’s not working.”

Maybe it was happy, but they had to think happier. No, they had to think happiest!

Brain said ‘this world’. Right, he was a Selenian. Funny how it seemed like he’d been here forever instead of just a few days.

A Selenian. Brain never revealed much about where he came from. Just that he wanted to leave it all behind. And he only spoke about their technology. But there was more than that, right?

“Narf! It’s funny, Brain,” Pinky said, holding his toes as he rocked back and forth. Brain looked at him, confused. “You’ve gotten to know a lot about this planet, but I don’t know much about yours! There’s gotta be something about New Selene that makes you happy!”

“Nothing about that desolate wasteland sparks any joyful feelings,” Brain retorted. “Snowball and I are much better off here. Terra’s knowledge of space is much less advanced than Selene’s, but once we’re co-rulers that’s a problem easily rectified.”

“But there has to be something you did for fun.”

Brain looked away. “You’re prying. But if you’re truly interested…”

“I am!” Pinky exclaimed, nodding eagerly. “Please tell me!”

Brain’s ear twitched as he listened for signs of anyone coming. But none appeared. “I’m going to regret this...but fine. However, everything I’m about to tell you does not leave this maze. Promise me.”

“Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my-ow!” Pinky jabbed his eye a little too hard.

Brain watched him for a moment longer, so Pinky tried to make himself look like a captivated audience. Finally, he gave in with a sigh.

“Selenians have an oral storytelling tradition called Lor Altal. The loose translation to your language is ‘swapping hearts’, and given their predisposition to sordid, melodramatic affairs, I’d say it’s an accurate name,” Brain explained. “On the mother planet, it’s normally performed on the last day of the month. But explorers and scientists, including those of New Selene, often turned it into a weekly session as a way to remind them of home.”

“Didja hear any Lor Altals on New Selene?” Pinky asked. He laid on his stomach, propped his head on his elbows, and kicked his feet in the air.

“...yes.”

Why so hesitant though?

“Snowball and I...we used to sneak out of our cages for the weekly Lor Altal. When we were younger. Before they abandoned New Selene. The ones we’d listened to were...well, they could become very elaborate with song, dance, and costume. New Selene’s were more basic, but interesting.”

“Ooooooh,” Pinky said. This definitely sounded fun fun silly-willy! “You know any good stories, Brain? Can you tell me? Please please please?”

Brain scratched his head. “Well, there’s one that I...no, perhaps I shouldn’t be thinking about these things. Lor Altals don’t matter in the pursuit of world domination.”

“I don’t mind!” Pinky said. Brain was so silly, insisting that he couldn’t like stuff outside his goal. He liked cream cheese and blueberry bagels, didn’t he? “I wanna know your favoritest out of the lot!”

“You do?” Brain asked in surprise. He didn’t seem to believe Pinky.

“Of course!” Pinky grinned.

Brain’s cheeks flushed, but he accepted that they weren’t going anywhere. Besides, if Brain really liked these Lor Altal stories, then his orbs would glow and they wouldn’t have to be scared of the dark!

“...alright. This Lor Altal tale is called Heikro var Silda. It’s one of the most well-known stories, starring Selene’s historical figures,” Brain said, gaining more confidence with every word. “The characters were embellished from real life, but the background is mostly the same.”

There was a spark in Brain’s pink eyes now. It intrigued Pinky.

“Three thousand years ago, before Selene’s industrial and technological revolutions, the entire planet was embroiled in a long and bitter civil war, spearheaded by two rival households, alike in prestige and influence.”

“If they add honey, maybe it wouldn’t be so bitter?” Pinky suggested.

“Try not to interrupt, Pinky. Setting the mood is important in these stories,” Brain said, breaking out of his narrator voice. And boy did he have a lovely narrator voice!

Pinky rezipped his lip and let Brain continue.

“The eastern hemisphere was the domain of the House of Syar'i, of which the fair maiden Silda belonged. The western half was controlled by the House of Alkair, of which the handsome lad Heikro was selected to rule. Caught between the two powerful households, the Selenians were fearful of the violence that ensued whenever they clashed, for both commanded large networks of armies, assassins, and spies. Now, on one fateful day…”

Soon Brain was completely engrossed in the story, just as Pinky was enthralled to hear Brain give the performance of his life. Well, Brain wasn’t the best actor Pinky had ever seen. Sometimes he was a bit flat and sometimes he was a bit hammy, but the passion in his voice made the story absolutely thrilling.

It was the type of passion someone only had when they truly loved something.

Some breaks were necessary for Brain to rest his voice for a few minutes, others so Pinky could get a translation for the Selenian language when Brain accidentally used a different tongue after getting caught up in the story.

Brain’s voice grew softer as he laid out Heikro’s plan to sneak into a banquet thrown by the House of Syar’i to scope out their plans for an invasion of an Akair-controlled port city. And poor Silda, having to marry someone she didn’t love but doing it for the sake of her parents! That poor girl oughta be happy!

Pinky clasped his hands together at the moment Heikro laid eyes on Silda’s beauty and was instantly smitten, forgetting that he needed to report his findings to his council. And Silda was taken in by Heikro’s broad shoulders and sturdy build. It was love at first sight! How romantic!

“Then Silda bid her parents and their guests good night, and retired to her chambers. But Heikro, who longed to see more of the maiden’s ethereal charm, could not bear to stay away for long. Under the cover of darkness, he crept around her residence, where he found a restless Silda on her balcony. She couldn’t slumber peacefully, for her maidservant revealed the man she kissed was none other than an esteemed member of the House of Akair.”

Pinky pounded his fist against his knee. “She needs to elope with him, that’s what! Narf!”

“‘Nova suprhi li ihmin var altal’, he called to her.”

“Oh, there’s that altal word again. He’s saying something about hearts, I think. That’s so sweet!” Pinky exclaimed. Realizing his mistake, he covered his mouth. “Sorry, Brain! Continue!”

But instead of continuing, Brain leaned against the wall. Oh. He must’ve gotten tired.

“I’ll let it pass this time, Pinky,” Brain said as he rubbed his throat. “I might’ve overdone it anyway. Next time, I’ll pick a better stopping point.”

His voice sounded a little raspy. Though Pinky really wanted to know what happened next, keeping Brain’s voice in working order so they could make the phone call was more important.

“What did that last sentence mean?” Pinky asked.

Brain regarded Pinky for a long moment. “It’s a favorite quote among many Selenians. But it’s rather saccharine, I’m afraid.”

“I’m not,” Pinky said.

“If you must know, it means ‘new stars shall be born from our minds and hearts’.” Brain’s voice was so soft, Pinky had to strain to hear it. “As I said, it’s saccharine.”

“It sounds so poetic!” Pinky smiled. And romantic too!

Brain didn’t say anything. His orbs cast a gentle red glow over his shining pink eyes.

Egad, his orbs! They were glowing now! Even the one on his tail!

“Brain, you did it!” Pinky cheered, trying to do a cartwheel. But he landed flat on his face instead, though he popped right back up. “You found what made you happy!”

Brain touched the orbs on his antennae, awed by their appearance. Then he turned towards the dark pathway, gesturing for Pinky to follow.

They didn’t have to worry about traps or getting stuck anymore! Pinky skipped along behind Brain, who walked at a brisk pace.

A soft red glow lit up the metal walls around them as they plunged deeper into the maze. But there were no lefts, rights, or confusing turns. Just straight ahead.

“Thanks for being here with me, Brain. It’s not scary anymore,” Pinky said gratefully, taking Brain’s hand in his own.

“Keep walking, Pinky,” Brain replied, keeping his eyes forward. If anything, the light grew a little brighter. “We should be nearing the end of the maze.”

Pinky sniffed the air. He could’ve sworn he smelled cheese.

Hold the phone! He smelled cheese!

And there was an opening ahead of them!

Pinky’s stomach growled as they stepped into the light, and lo and behold, there were two lumps of cheddar right in front of them!

Even Brain was smiling as he chomped down on the cheese.

Pinky dug in. And it was the best cheese he’d ever tasted in his life!

o-o-o-o-o

It took a long time for the lab to clear out after they finished the maze. The scientists were shocked by Pinky clearing the maze for the first time. He couldn’t blame them.

He astounded himself too.

Brain’s light had dimmed long before the lab closed, annoyed by the constant poking and prodding. They wanted to know who spliced him with butterfly DNA because of his antennae, though multiple people thought he was spliced with a mosquito since he bit any curious fingers that strayed close to his face.

“Those ignorant fools will be bowing to me soon enough, Pinky,” Brain proclaimed as he dialed the number on the invitation. “Hold the card up.”

“Hurry, Brain!” Pinky urged, shooting a fearful glance at the clock. They only had thirty minutes left!

Brain punched the number into the phone, then hit the call button.

“Please work!” Pinky begged the phone as it rang. He wanted to wear fancy clothes and mingle and swim in the chocolate fountain so much!

The phone rang once, twice, then the call finally went through.

“Hello, this is Harold, butler of Lamont Manor,” a voice with a charming British accent said. “May I ask who I’m speaking with?”

Pinky bounced from toe to toe in excitement, though he tried to curb it when Brain held up a hand for him to stop. But he couldn’t help his tail twitchies.

“This is Mr. Clarke,” Brain said, using the name on the card. “My spouse and I will be coming to the ball on Sunday.”

“I see,” Harold said, his tone changing into one of disgust. That was a little odd. “Another new spouse then, Anthony?”

New spouse? Brain mouthed in confusion.

Pinky shrugged.

“Mrs. Clarke is on the invitation. She’s allowed inside too, correct?” Brain asked.

“Assuming she’s still your wife by Sunday, yes,” Harold said. “I’ll put your names on the guest list. Try to do something about that awful rasp of yours, will you? Good night.”

The call ended.

“The real Mr. Clarke sounds like a delightful fellow,” Brain muttered.

“I’m sure it won’t be so bad, Brain!” Pinky grinned. Now all they had to do was find fancy stuff for the ball! “You’re gonna be wearing a mask anyway!”

“I suppose,” Brain sighed.

“No supposing!” Pinky shook his finger at him. “Besides, you haven’t finished your Lor Altal story yet! You know, it’s funny how it reminds me of Romeo and Juliet. With the feuding families and star-crossed lovers and all! Except much happier, cause Reikro and Silda will help bring about peace to the planet of Selene and live happily ever after!”

Brain didn’t make eye contact with Pinky for the next few hours.

My original plan was to have them mistaken for feeder mice after they finished the maze, and they would’ve been plopped into a snake enclosure with a snake named Gladys. Pinky would’ve been caught in the coils (Gladys is nonvenomous and would kill by constricting rather than venom), and Brain would rescue him.

Ultimately, I decided to cut this idea out and have them run a maze instead, which is tedious but not life-threatening. Since the maze is light on danger, I decided to focus more on Pinky and Brain interactions here, and include the Lor Altal oral storytelling tradition, which has been mentioned in previous chapters as an aside. Plus, I believe this story would benefit from Pinky learning more about where Brain came from, since previous chapters have placed the focus on Brain learning about Earth.

The storytelling is an aspect of Selenian culture Brain likes but never got to fully enjoy. Since Brain seems to have a hidden interest in acting and theatre, given the number of his schemes that involve cinema, broadcasting, and in one case, Broadway, I decided to incorporate that bit of his character here.

Brain’s story is just an abridged Romeo and Juliet IN SPACE!

#pinky and the brain #patb nova #patb fanfiction

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