#is action the most important thing? no. but it’s a continuation of the themes and conflicts and emotions surrounding it

[bayesiandragon]

Not sure I care enough to engage with the post, but to read SVSSS + extras and come away with the interpretation that SJ doesn't care about why YQY failed to save him, just that he did fail, and therefore would never forgive him or change his behavior towards him if he learned the truth, feels off-place to me. It seems to lean into the view that SJ doesn't actually care about YQY, just sees him as a useful tool, and thus couldn't be hurt by the supposed abandonment - with that interpretation it would then make sense to think he would neither care nor change his behavior (towards YQY) upon learning what actually happened.

[ahdriking]

Get to know your fic writer!

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[stonewall-if]

Stonewall Military Academy: the most brutal, merciless, and unforgiving boarding school in the country. Most recruits either desert or die by the end of their first year. It is where the fiercest and deadliest killers are trained and molded to be the military's steel fist. And it is not for the faint of heart.

Your late mother was once the most respected Commander in the military...until she turned against her country and was killed. Her betrayal killed important figures, left thousands dead, and almost made your people lose a war against a monstrous opposition that threatens the livelihood of your people every day.

Your family has gone into hiding since then, exiled and branded as traitors. But when you're forced to defend your sibling, you're given two options: death or become Stonewall's newest recruit, which is a death sentence in and of itself.

You choose Stonewall.

Your mother's betrayal has tainted your family, has made anyone with your last name hated and has exiled them in circles your family once commanded. You will be bullied, ostracized, even almost killed by your fellow recruits who believe you lower than dirt.

But that won't stop you. You won't be part of the 99% of recruits who die or desert. You will get out of here. You will learn about your mother. And you will live to see graduation.

Will you?

Stonewall is an 18+ dark interactive fiction with minimal fantasy elements that follows MC to a ruthless military academy. Things such as explicit violence, death, bullying, and dark themes are prevalent.

Choose your gender identity and shape your recruit's personality.

Were you a bloodthirsty fighter--everything your parents wanted you be--or what people can consider a 'weakling'?

Fight violence with violence or confront your fellow student's violence with your words, or do nothing at all.

Rebel or become a loyal soldier. Fight for the High Commander's respect or be a thorn at their side.

Romance, befriend or become an enemy to a cast of characters.

Try to survive in the deadliest school in the country.

The High Commander: the leader of Stonewall. She is ruthless, bloodthirsty, and the source of nightmares for many. She doesn't expect you to make it here. Best to prove her wrong.

Your sibling: who is the closest person to you. Your actions saved them from a life of misery and you will continue to do everything in your power to protect them.

Roman [m] or Raven [f][RO]: your new mentor and trainer. R has long graduated as a student and is a full-fledged warrior working at Stonewall. They are cold, brutally honest, detached and unforgiving. They will push you to your limits, and they don't care how you feel about it. Really, they expected you to desert the moment you stepped foot into this place.

At least they're not unnecessarily cruel...which is the most you can hope for here.

Ivan [m] or Iris [f] [RO]: coming from the most powerful military family, I's bloodline has made them the most sought-after student in the school. Your mother also killed their father, so it is no surprise they hate your guts. They are at the top of the rankings, which means they are a bully, but a dangerous one. And they will not make your time here easy.

Marshall [m] or Maureen [f] [RO]: the bumbling, happy-go-lucky recruit that came in the same day as you. No one knows how the shy and easily scared M got into Stonewall...must be because they're from a line of powerful commanders. Still, they are nothing like their family, and you feel bad knowing the students are going to eat them alive. Stonewall will likely kill them before this year ends. Not your problem, right?

Enzo [m] or Eris [f][RO]: the child of the High Commander. No one wants to cross them, so no one talks to them. They are isolated like you but in a different way: they are fawned over while simultaneously being avoided. It seems like you may just be E's only ally in here (or not).

+more!

[elysiansparadise]

Hi !! I was wondering if you could do Mars in the 10H? 🤍 I looked at your masterlist and read almost all of it— YES, I AM (HEALTHILY) OBSESSED WITH YOU 🍰, your page, content, aesthetic, etc— and I haven't seen the placement yet 🍓 I saw your post to ask the ones you may have not done yet.

Thank you so muchhh!! We appreciate your efforts to complete it 🤍

Awww, hello love! You are so sweet, thank you so much for your words. 🤍

Mars in the 10th house

Many of these natives have a strong desire for success, a need to be in control of their lives and not let anything or anyone seek to interfere in their affairs. Courageous, ambitious, cunning and strategic, many of them are good at long-term planning, however they will always prefer to act rather than continue drowning in excessive planning. For them it is important to be proud of themselves, they want to achieve things on their own and achieve their goals. Some of these natives have difficulty celebrating their achievements, they only feel relieved to have completed their tasks and wonder what’s next. They are competitive either with people who work with them or even with versions of themselves from the past, since there is a strong drive to want to improve themselves and be better than before. They do not believe that things magically happen, rather they seek to make them happen. They are decisive, they know perfectly well what they want and what they don't want to deal with. They are people who think what is necessary before deciding something. They can become recognized throughout their lives for their decision, their strength, courage and determination. People know they can't mess with them. They will not hesitate to defend themselves or those in their charge if they feel threatened, they do not care about gender or age, because if you want their respect, you have to earn it with actions.

They give the impression of being very self-confident, they have strong-willed and intimidating vibes, they are usually seen as sexy or seductive and attract a lot of attention, as they seem to be perfectly content without someone else. Their independence, will and attitude are seen as irresistible. They can attract attention easily, and many of them can attract without intending or realizing it people who compare themselves a lot with them and who compete with the natives. They never settle for the minimum and if they can aspire and have better things, they will go after it. It is difficult to take them by surprise because they are constantly alert. One of the things they hate the most and that provokes their anger is being compared to other people, people who spend their time complaining all the time without doing anything about it and people who don't take responsibility for their own actions. 

These natives find ambitious, hard-working people who take great care of their appearance attractive. They are attracted to the desire to get ahead and self-improve. Furthermore, for them it is crucial that more than just physical attraction and feelings of love, there is mutual admiration between them and their partners. They are very passionate and very sensual people in the most intimate sphere, they make sure to make their partner feel safe, confident in their bodies and very desired. Power can seem very attractive to them, from finding people in important positions attractive in whatever field they work in, to people who have this powerful vibe. High sex drive, they can become more attractive as the years go by. They are not afraid to be dominant or let their partners be dominant. They like the theme of one of the two being dominant. They like the idea of ​​taking things slowly, filling their partner with caresses, flooding them with pleasant and sensual sensations, for them it is crucial that both they and their partners enjoy the moment and not feel rushed or pressured.

-> Go back to the masterlist

[yanderestarangel]

♡ 𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐓𝐋𝐄 𝐁𝐑𝐀𝐓 | 𝐓𝐄𝐀𝐂𝐇𝐄𝐑!𝐍𝐀𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐈 𝐊𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐎 𝐗 𝐅𝐓𝐌 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐑

TW: dom!nanami kento, objectification, humiliation, degradation, v!sex, oral (f!re), dark themes, extreme smut, nsfw, reader is himbo, power play, manipulation, corruption, erodark, master x sub, teacher nanami x student reader, virgin reader, aggressive sex, porn plot, dark!nanami kento, sadism.

You didn't like him, and he couldn't understand the logical reason for such actions. Nanami Kento was your college biology teacher, he was a polite and serious man, but you simply didn't respect him! You didn't attend his classes, you always rolled your eyes in disdain when he scolded you, even suspensions didn't work anymore, Kento had reached his limit, for several reasons. The main thing about him was that your lack of interest in everything and especially in him, made him grind his teeth in anger and a sadistic desire to make you suffer, to make you suffer by his hands.

You were pretty, young and bratty, a dangerous and perfect combo in Kento's eyes, he hated how hard his dick got when he saw you walk by. How beautifully you smile at your friends in class. How you challenged him, as if he wasn't important enough for your attention. That awakened his fury and darkest desires, how he wanted to bend you over some table and spank your pussy until you screamed and cried his name, apologizing for having treated him so badly.

So, he soon discovered your weak point, your grades.

You needed to go straight to the other semester of college, but his grade was the main thing to define your failure or your success. He smiled brightly at the discovery, he could take revenge on you and still get what he always wanted... You.

"-Well (Y/N) it seems that there are a few mistakes in your test." Nanami said, retrieving your paper and glancing at the "incorrect" answers - They were all correct, but he had the power to simply clear everything and fail you - you were confused, swearing you had studied hard to pass his class.

"-But don't worry, I'd be more than happy to help you understand the material better." He leaned closer, his voice lowering to a whisper. "-I could give you some private tutoring sessions, if you'd like. Just between us, of course." His gaze was intense, suggesting a different kind of tutoring that went beyond academics. You tried to leave, do what your mind was telling you, run away, but the blonde man's calloused and strong fingers grabbed your hair and Nanami's grip on your scalp tightened, a mixture of dominance and desperation in his eyes. His desire for you seemed to consume him, his facade crumbling under the weight of his lust.

"-Do you think you can resist me little brat?" Nanami growled, his voice laced with a raw intensity. "-You've tempted me for a long time and now it's time to submit, I'm tired of you."

He knelt before you, your gaze fixed on his, while his other hand grabbed your thigh possessively. "-And if you think your grades won't suffer if you resist, you're sadly mistaken."

As Nanami spoke, his fingers crept up your inner thigh, teasingly close to your most intimate area. He leaned closer, his breath ghosting over your thigh, he placed a dangerous, loveless kiss on your skin - just a bittersweet threat to your position there. Nanami's intense gaze locked onto his, palpable dominance in him as he let go of your hair and praised you for your submission. The mixture of fear and excitement coursed through your veins, sharpening your senses and leaving you breathless, it was a dangerous situation, but something there, something in the veins of anger, his gaze filled with hate and desire, his eyebrows furrowed into a line, the trembling lips, the veins pulsing in his muscular arms - all of that gave you an aesthetic pleasure, a forbidden pleasure -

"-Good boy" he continued, as he handed him the bottle of lubricant. His own arousal was evident as he unzipped his pants, releasing his hardened erection, his fat, pulsing cock popping out of his clothes, presenting itself to your gaze.

"-Get ready doll boy." The teacher ordered, his voice firm but tinged with a hint of need. "-Use the lube to make the way easier for me."

He watched you intently, his eyes full of expectation and even a sadistic vengeful pleasure, an ununderstood anger, however, was there - as you applied the lubricant to yourself. The smoothness of the gel against your skin sent waves of pleasure throughout your body, mixing with nervous excitement.

Meanwhile, Kento stroked his length, his fingers moving in rhythmic motions as he watched you prepare yourself under his guidance. Every touch, every movement, was meticulously calculated to increase his desire and make you crave his touch even more.

Nanami's eyes became transfixed on your intimate display, his own arousal intensifying with every movement you made. The sight of your tight virgin pussy and your struggle to slide a finger inside only further fueled his eagerness to have you soon for him, he felt like a god, he had never felt so powerful.

He continued to stroke his erection, his eyes never leaving you, his gaze filled with a hunger that mirrored his own.

As you moaned sweetly in front of him, Nanami could no longer resist the temptation. He needed to feel you, taste your exuberant sweetness.

With a primal grunt, he stood up and quickly advanced towards your, pressing your back against the table. His hands grabbed your hips possessively, taking control of the situation.

"-Enough preparation, be a good boy and spread those thighs wide for me."

He quickly coated his fingers with more lube, making sure your entrance was slick and ready for him, the thought of burying himself deep inside you made him almost lose control.

With an authoritative yet gentle touch - The sight of your swollen entrance and your pulsing clit made his mouth water with anticipation - Unable to resist any longer, he leaned in, his tongue darting out to taste your essence. He savored the sweet taste of your arousal, his lips and tongue working expertly to bring you pleasure.

As he paid attention to your sensitive nub, he could feel your body responding, your moans and tremors urging him to thrust harder, the taste of juices and lubrication staining the older man's lips - his tongue danced over your throbbing clit, shaking and turning deftly. He could feel your breathing quickening, your moans getting louder, and it only fueled his own hunger for you.

"-Fuck pretty boy, I need to fuck you here and now." He leans over and spits on your pussy, not a gesture of lubricating your little hole even more, but rather a demonstration of power, placing you on a pedestal of just a cheap whore, but Kento's brown eyes said something else, something confusing. Yes, he wanted to take revenge on you, but to what extent had he not used his feelings of anger to cover up a passion or obsession for you? He wouldn't have that answer there, and he didn't want to.

He disregarded your resistance, his need and dominance overriding any protest you might have made. "-Do you think you can resist me? Do you think you can deny me what I want? Do you think you have a say in how this happens?"

"-With every thrust, I will remind you of every moment you thought you could resist. When you dared to defy me, despising me like trash, as if I were nothing to you." Nanami spoke with one of the veins bulging from his neck and forehead, pinning you to the hard wooden table, he didn't even put on a condom, With a sudden surge of strength, Kento penetrated deeper into you, hitting that hidden spot that sent shockwaves of pleasure for your body.

"-Well, let's see how much of a 'good boy' you really are when I take everything from you." - You could feel everything, the feeling of pain from your ruptured hymen, the pulsation of his cock in your core, the thick girth stretching you with each slow movement of having total entry into your cunt, which led you to hold onto him, desperately looking for support, in the hard muscles covered by the thin fabric of his dress shirt -

Nanami's eyes were filled with a dangerous lust as he watched you, the sight of your legs shaking and your body arching against him, was too much for him to handle. It had been so long since he had pleasure like this - not just physical, with your tight pussy, but mental, seeing you submit to him like that, was like paradise for him. "-My chérie ..." Kento murmured, his voice full of pride and satisfaction. "-You see? This is what you were made for. To surrender to me, to crave my touch, my dominance."

His thrusts were demanding, with no room for you to even adjust to his size. His fingers moved fast on your clit, the rhythm matching the rhythm of his cruel thrusts, he could see the bulge in your womb because of his cock.

"-Fuck look at that, such a good pussy... Fuck you are a hungry little slut, just waiting to be fucked like a cute and needy himbo that you are, aren't you?" He smiled, sweat falling from his forehead, as he moaned next to you, every inch of him buried deep in your most secret intimate. "-I am more than just your teacher. I am your master. Your god. Your savior from the mundane life you so long to escape." His fingers moved faster on your clit, his rhythm matching the rhythm of his thrusts, as if they were dancing an erotic waltz that only the two of you could understand.

"-You're mine, my good boy, even if you're a fucking slut." he murmured, his voice low and seductive but filled with a dangerous undertone.

"-Yes, cum for daddy" He whispered again, the nickname full of possessiveness and control, he felt your tremors, he knew you were going to cum, the sweet taste was of knowing he had taken your virginity and it had been your first to make you reach climax.

"-You're so wet, so tight... I can't even..." Kento moaned loudly, his balls hit your ass cheeks, leaving them with bruises from the speed and rough treatment.

He thrust one last time, burying himself deep inside you as his cum dripped down his shaft and onto the table below you.

When it was all over, when he had given her everything he could, Nanami leaned forward, pressing his forehead against hers.

He paused for a moment, watching you lay beneath him, covered in your combined essence, the evidence of your surrender and submission etched into your body, your makeup smeared, your short skirt messy.

"-Look at you... You don't look so brat now, right?" Nanami pulled out of you slowly, each inch eliciting a moan from your lips.

He picked up your panties that had fallen to the side, holding them for you to see, with a smirk. "-When you lie beneath me, broken and begging for more... Those panties will be the only reminders of who really holds the power here... Me, you will come back looking for more." With those words, Nanami tore off your panties, tearing them into two halves.

"-And so" He continued, holding half of the torn fabric. "-Your virginity will never be complete again. You will carry that reminder wherever you go, a constant reminder of what happens when you dare defy me."

He tossed the panties aside, his eyes lingering on your nakedness for a moment before turning around, reaching into his pocket.

"-Your grades stayed the same, don't worry, clean yourself up and get out of here, I think you learned your lesson." He spoke coldly, quickly turning to face you, he opened his lips to say something, but changed his mind, returning to his cold and calculated expression, leaving the room, with a loud thud.

©YANDERESTARANGEL 2023

[thorough-witness-enjoyer]

In the face of recent news about our beloved Destiny, I think it’s more important than ever for us as a community to come together and support each other in numerous ways.

It’s been a very hard week for all of us, especially those who lost their jobs and outlet for their passion in mass lay offs. Losing a position that allowed you to craft magnificent stories alongside some of the most ambitious people in the gaming industry, especially in worrying economic circumstances, must be excruciating to deal with and I wish the best for all those laid off from Bungie.

For us fans, it hurts more than anything to see the game you care so much for get put in headlines for how little that care is shared amongst the people responsible for making decisions on it. I’ve been into Destiny since it first dropped, making it the love of my life for nearly two-thirds of my whole existence , and to hear about how it’s just another product to be sold when it’s everything and more to me is just despairing. I wanted to become a writer and concept artist to create a game for others that made them feel as cared for as I did when I played Destiny and now I’m sitting here seeing all the people who helped foster that feeling be treated as another expenditure.

It’s awful, a lot of us are feeling really uninspired and betrayed at the moment, not sure we even want to see what will happen to this masterpiece of a game in the hands of the current executives. We are also dearly missing the developers, artists, writers, and more who made Destiny more than a fps looter shooter.

But it is times like these where we are torn and confused that we must uplift one another and not let the bitter taste of Bungie’s actions make us speak with hostility. This is not about decisions on whether to support Bungie or the actual game, but about refocusing on what truly makes Destiny enjoyable to so many.

Its world is immersive with care put into every story and that clearly shows in just how eager fans are to create masterpieces for it. It was never playing the game or the notoriety that kept me coming back for more, but the joy of creation I could share with others.

It stings to see a disinterest in nursing the potential of the Destiny universe from the executives with motivations other than monetary gain, but when the executives won’t care, we can. There are still employees at Bungie who adore their work and we can continue to support them by speaking up against horrible industry practices and show that we won’t abandon their efforts to make Destiny what it is.

Make ocs, write fanfictions, follow the former employees wherever they go, draw til your heart is overflowing, join Discords, roleplay, share headcanons, create aus with friends, do whatever keeps Destiny alive and flourishing for you!

Destiny will never die to me, even when it’s long forgotten and the servers shut down, because Destiny made me who I am and I intend to repay that gift an infinite amount of times over. The characters and universe will be alive and well to me until I die, regardless of the fate of the game and Bungie.

So go out and prove that Destiny’s themes of the power of community and hope are more than just morals behind a screen, that they are life changing messages that we will carry on despite hopeless news!!

Reblog charming artists, message people about ships you enjoy, leave questions and tags that contribute to conservations, write essays about what Destiny means to you!!

My messages and inbox for questions are always open if anyone would like to talk (I’m trying to get better at answering them, even if they are months late)! You are all welcome here and I want to start reblogging and liking more freely even if those things scare me sometimes!

We can decide our fates and we can decide the fate of Destiny’s presence in our lives as well! We can choose to care when others won’t and refuse to make our enjoyment debatable!! In troubling times, we should be able to reach out into the dark and find hands to hold onto tight!!

[hijinks-n-lowjinks]

thoughts on 268 and megumi

This post is going to be a long discussion of how I interpret Megumi's situation with both Sukuna and with Yuuji. I do detail some of my own experiences with mental health and how my interpretation of the chapter and Megumi's characterization are influenced directly by it.

(tw: discussions of depression/mental health/suicide/suicidal ideation)

First of all, people respond and interpret and react to media/stories differently. Just because someone has a different take than you does not mean that they are wrong! Those feelings come from a very real place and it's important to process and converse about media with that sort of empathy in mind.

Moving on to the actual analysis part, there is one central theme and framing that I'm starting to believe gege has intended to use Megumi's situation as a metaphor/allusion for: mental illness/suicidal ideation.

Megumi is trapped within himself, stuck in darkness that he can't seem to find his way out of by himself. His condition only grew worse and worse the longer he spent time stuck in his own body to the point where we began to see a lot of self-destructive tendencies and suicidal ideation from him. He didn't care if he lived or died, the most important thing to him was to just stop feeling everything that was hurting him and for the others to stop working so hard and putting themselves in danger to help someone he believed wasn't worth the effort.

We see Sukuna trying to convince Megumi not to fight back and to give in to his control. He throws accusations at Megumi that we as the audience know are manipulations of reality, but they are the words that someone dealing with depression will hear from their inner worst self no matter how twisted they are from reality.

The twist here is that Megumi tells Sukuna that he has never intended on living a life he personally cares about, but that he's going to continue to let the people he loves anchor and tether him to life.

And then Megumi is literally pulled from the darkness through the actions of someone else/someone who loves him. Yuuji is fighting for Megumi and his words and actions have finally made an impact and helped Megumi fight back.

And the crazy thing is, Sukuna chases after him. Depression and mental health are constant struggles even after recovery. It feels like there's a constant pressure not to backslide into bad habits and spiral back down the depression rabbit hole. Mental health struggles will always linger, but that's why we have to fight back and choose to want to get better.

The biggest divide in the fandom reaction to 268 is Megumi's words "just once more, I want to try living for someone else."

Now, I think the words "I'm doing to live for someone else" have been taken so literally by people that they think it means "and therefore I am not living for myself." Those two things are not opposites, but go hand in hand!

I can agree this decision gege made for him is not as satisfying as Megumi choosing to live for himself, but I do believe this was a purposeful decision and that it is the most realistic choice for someone in Megumi's position.

Not to get too specific, but for a couple of years the only thing keeping me from a complete spiral into an actual contemplation of suicide was because of my relationships to other people. I stayed alive because of them. I barely took care of myself and basically forced myself to do the bare minimum because I knew that somehow there were people in my life who wanted me to live.

I could not live for myself. I did not care for or love myself in the slightest, so why would I try to make my life better? The only reason I actually started caring about myself was because other people cared for me first. They told me I was loved, that they enjoyed spending time with me, that I was someone who would be missed if things ever did go south.

That's why Yuuji being the catalyst behind Megumi's decision to fight was so impactful to me, because Megumi was me.

Megumi's decision being influenced by his relationship with Yuuji instantly reminded me of one of my favorite monologues from Fruits Basket where they discuss self love and how choosing to care about your own life isn't as simple as many neurotypicals often make it out to be. It's a scene that was heavily impactful to me when I was going through my worst times and I feel like it really puts Megumi's choice to live for the sake of others in perspective.

"There was a time when I stopped talking, like you. The reason was a little different, but I think the feelings of shame and self-hatred are similar. Your teacher advises you to “love yourself”. What does that even mean? “Look for good points"… how is someone supposed to find those? I only knew the things that I hated about myself. The whole reason we despise ourselves is because we can only see the parts we hate, so forcing ourselves to find good things feels pointless, like we'd just be making them up. It's a nice sentiment, but it’s not always that simple. Instead, I think it's when someone else says they love you that you're finally able to begin to love yourself. When someone truly accepts who you are, that's when you can start to forgive yourself and suddenly see the good things you've had all along."

This scene hit me hard when I first watched it. It was exactly what I needed to hear: that I wasn’t weak and pathetic for not being able to see a future for myself on my own. I wasn't weak because I had to rely on the support of others to keep my head above water. I wasn't weak because I needed their love and praise to enable me to see those very same aspects about me that they loved!!!

Living for the sake of others is not the end all be all of recovery. That is merely the first step: recognizing that you are loved and that you want to live because others want you to live. That is not where recovery stops! It's a long, arduous journey where you eventually have to choose to live for yourself because you want to. But sometimes that decision is so daunting and feels so impossible when you're in the thick of it that it can completely crush your spirit.

When you're at the end of your rope, it's the people you love who tie you back down.

In my mind, Megumi didn't choose to fight or live only because of Yuuji. Yuuji was the catalyst, but not the entire purpose. Megumi heard that he was loved by someone, and because he loved them in return he chose to fight. He wanted to experience that love and thus show Yuuji that he was loved in return by fighting to stay with him.

[harmonysanreads]

Hello there! 👋 I really like your al haitham fics and I was wondering...

if you could do a yan! al haitham with a reader who's sweet and friendly? (Basically a sunshine reader cause I like sunshine characters to balance out the cold characters)

(Hope your having a good day! :) )

Apricate

yandere alhaitham x reader

cw(s) : general yandere themes

no because I'm so soft for this pairing too (T▽T) Sunshine x Sunshine Protector so trueee

Alhaitham has found himself in a predicament as of late.

Well, ‘predicament’ as far as the time it's requiring him to decipher the case — which, if he was honest, has snowballed further than what he deems efficient of himself. Whenever Alhaitham finds himself in a pickle, his tactic is to assess the weakest link of the situation, so that it's solved with minimum energy and action. However this time, doing that had just resulted in him being stuck in his head for weeks, vacillating between the plethora of methods to integrate your existence with his — without any repercussions.

And by which, he means for your hand in marriage.

Now, this questionable phrasing appearing to be a misnomer for a rather harmless intention for someone of his age, would've sounded less absurd if the conditions for a proposal with such social importance were met — you know, if both parties were familiar and shared adequate affections to escalate to that stage. The Acting Grand Sage is not delusional, you and him barely know each other (or at least, you do) but does that stop him from planning ahead?

No, not when he's certain there'd be no such gap remaining once he's finally cracked the code.

If Alhaitham was being honest, he truly has achieved it all : academic accomplishments, a stable job with a handsome wage, a spacious house, his title as one of Sumeru's heroes and his looks as the cherry on top — the only thing lacking now, is someone to bring warmth to his house (and no, his leech of a roommate does not count). It's fairly recent that such an idea or need occurred to him, being most content with his own presence for all his life, he had thought that he could pass the rest just the same.

Had it been the images of lovers strolling along the streets of Sumeru hand-in-hand that he'd previously paid no heed to? Had it been the children coddled alongside their parents and the passing thought, could he have that, too? If he tried? Or was it just you, who'd become the challenger of his views?

He's well-aware of how he's seen at times ; an emotionless rock. Which is why his late-grandmother had been concerned at the earlier days, even the most self-sufficient human is bound to crave connection at one point and who would accept him, if he continued to be like this? Alhaitham had thought about it long and hard, does he need to change himself to be accepted by you, at least? Would his brooding bluntness dent your amicability?

Alhaitham has only talked to you thrice, but three times is all he needed to confirm that no, he needn't put on a facade when you can just become the flower blooming alongside the rock ; balance his flaws and in turn, he'll balance yours. And what better way to ensure that equilibrium than through the sacred bond of marriage?

Now, if only these other pests could stop leeching off of your attention.

Alhaitham watches from his peripheral, there is you, surrounded by a group of people again. It seemed as though you came to the library for something important but instead got swarmed by your ‘friends’ asking for help with this and that. Normally, you delightedly handle these crowds, solving each of their dilemmas with grace. Today though, it seemed your urgency weighed more.

Disappointing as it is admirable in a way, people of all kind seem to always flock around you. The Acting Grand Sage understands better why they do, your luminous countenance has drawn him to this pit as well. But unlike those fools, at least he isn't blind to your personal space. The predicament as a result, is like this : how can he form that connection with you if you're always surrounded by these self-serving idiots and achieve his greater plan of a peaceful, fulfilling life?

He notices your attention shift to his person at the corner of the library, you're quickly giving apologetic smiles to everyone surrounding you, pushing past the crowd and making your way to him. If you looked back, you'd be able to see the array of flabbergasted faces, some then morphing into distaste when they see who exactly you'd abandoned them for — but you don't, as per the Scribe's advice.

Alhaitham pretends to be taken aback when you sheepishly greet him and ask if you could sit with him, he responds in the positive and you heave a sigh of relief.

You did it.

“I did it. I did as you advised me.”

The corner of Alhaitham's lips curve slightly, his gaze flickers between the page of his book and yourself before him.

“And how do you feel?”

You halt for a moment, as if processing your very being from the inside out to answer that question.

“I...I feel free, strangely.”

This time the Scribe fully settles on the writings of the book, taking his quill and running it along the surface of the page in a crossing motion.

“I told you so.”

Alhaitham gains the solution at last ; he needn't get rid of them himself, he merely has to make you see the bad influences of your life and have you cut them off by yourself.

First step : achieved.

[mania-sama]

A Look into Mental Health: Jujutsu Kaisen Analysis

"Being a child is not a sin." (Nanami Kento, Jujutsu Kaisen)

With the release of Chapter 251, I've seen many horrible takes from dudebros saying that Megumi has "sold" the team. This makes me unreasonably angry because of course it does, so obviously my next plan of action is to take all of my hour-long rants about the mental health of JJK characters and put it here, where said dudebros will never see my (correct) analysis in their entire life. Oh well.

One thing Gege is really, really good at is creating believable, undeniably human, and complex characters. Every character has a different set of motivations, beliefs, ideals, and especially mental states. The constant theme of Jujutsu Kiasen has been "Strength vs Weakness". While the clearest interpretation can be seen through the physical attributes of the characters (Gojo being the strongest sorcerer of his time due to his abilities, and Miwa being one of the weakest, again, due to her abilities), it is also directly applied to the mental strength of characters. No two characters are able to withstand the same trauma and come out the exact same, just as no two real people can process the same trauma. Not only is it a result of nature, as people are genetically different and therefore process information differently, but a product of nurture - in other words, character motivation and environment.

This is where we come to the current state of the manga, Chapter 251. The fated Yuuji vs Megumi debate. I keep seeing people wildly misunderstanding these two, and why it's so important that Megumi isn't standing up to fight, why he isn't able to handle his trauma, when Yuuji can.

Gege writes phenomenal characters. And I want to express just how well done they are, making Jujutsu Kaisen actually kind of deserve its popularity, because some people only care about power scaling. I'm going to touch on Megumi last, because understanding all of the other characters' makes his visible struggle that much more impactful.

1. Geto Suguru

I want to start this mental health analysis with Geto. He is the best representation of depression I've ever seen in Shonen. It doesn't take a hundred chapters to showcase a character's downfall. It doesn't take a hundred significant events to cause a character to break down. Gege shows the best, realistic mental breakdown using only a handful of chapters, and still makes it slow and painful.

Depression can start because of a big event, but it doesn't take more for it to worsen. Untreated, depression runs a vicious course that eats a person through slowly but effectively. It isn't one screaming session, hands clutched over the head and cursing God and the world. It's everything piled onto each other. It's coming to the end of that pile and realizing that nothing will ever change.

This is Geto Suguru's story. He has a big event: the fight with Toji and the failure to save Riko. But his mental health journey was fated to decline, even without the fight and failure. The root issue of his depression came from his ability: Cursed Spirit Manipulation. As long as he kept devouring the embodiment of every vile, human emotion, the more he would lose himself to that vileness. He wasn't changing anything; he couldn't help but continue to swim in negativity because that's all he could do.

Gege wasn't making a commentary on Geto's ability. He was talking about people, as they are, and how staying in a bad situation will not always make you stronger. It can, and most likely will, make you worse. A direct comparison to the sixteen-year-old Geto would be a sixteen-year-old at school, surrounded by people who bully and pick on them with harsh words. The kid will eventually consume all of that bullying, all of that negativity, into their being, because there is simply nowhere else to go. School is mandatory; they can't just leave. They eventually feel isolated, with all that vileness piled on. Even if they have friends, those people could never understand what it's like to put up with humiliation and cruelty day after day.

It's not rational to push away a support system, but who said human beings are always rational? People make mistakes. They don't make the right decisions. Geto didn't. He saw someone offer him a chance at change, a possible light at the top of his pile and twisted it to match his overwhelming negativity. He left and swore to destroy the world that made him the way he is, just as that bullied child may turn away from school and society in whatever form that may take.

I want to touch on the physical aspects of Geto's depression, too. I noted this in a previous analysis I did on him (his character is just that amazing, what can I say?), but Gege knew that the mind can't be affected alone. Geto was drawn with deep eyebags, a nod to an inability to sleep or needing to sleep all the time. Depression makes you tired all the time. Everything becomes difficult. He sits with his back hunched, resting his weight on his knees, like sitting upright is too hard. When someone speaks to him, he blinks and takes a second too long to look over or respond, like speaking takes too much energy. To me, it even looked like he was becoming thinner. It's extremely difficult to maintain a schedule of exercise and mealtimes when your mind is fighting an active war against itself.

Again, a beautiful representation of depression. Geto means a lot to me in this aspect.

2. Gojo Satoru

In comparison to Geto, Gojo's horrible mental health is a lot subtler. Depression isn't the correct term, but you don't have to be depressed to be sad. Sadness is his stagnant state; he has moments of bliss, goals to work towards, a reason to keep going, to continue living, to continue chasing the sun over the horizon, but he does return to the same place he is always at when the lights turn off and he's painfully reminded of this one fact: he is isolated.

All of Gojo's problems start and end with isolation. From the moment he was born, everyone knew he was different. He knew he was different. Through glimpses of his childhood and honestly reading between the lines, it's obvious he never played with kids his age. People don't just develop a superiority complex with their only drive to be better than literally everyone else for no other reason than to get better. It comes from somewhere, and in Gojo's case, it's from his young childhood. It seriously messed him up; even now, he can't shake the lesson that "Strength is the only way to success and happiness".

This is what made Geto so important. Geto was somebody who could share the burden of being the strongest. Geto was someone his age who understood him in a way Shoko could not, though they both were able to see Gojo beyond his capabilities as a Jujutsu sorcerer. Gojo then had somebody to base his moral principles on. Because he couldn't connect with anybody else, he had no basis other than strength. Geto taught him why it was important for the strong to protect the weak.

Then everything went wrong. Gojo became isolated again in his strength and lost the only person who could plausibly stand with him. "Are you the strongest because you're Gojo Satoru, or are you Gojo Satoru because you're the strongest?" Gojo was young, then, and fresh-faced into his newfound godhood. He didn't kill Geto in that moment because he wanted to deny the claim that he is nothing without his strength, that he isn't as shallow as he was raised to be.

But he knew better. He grew older, he killed his best friend, and he realized that he was nothing without his strength. He never got over Geto. In order to cope with the guilt of being unable to save him when he left, he adopted a whole kid, thinking that if he wasn't strong enough to save Geto, maybe he could save Megumi. But there it is all over again - he never broke from the cycle of strength defining his worth. Saving Megumi would define his strength, right? It would prove Geto wrong, right? He raised Megumi under the same logic (that the only way to save his sister is to be strong), only ridding the boy of the crushing isolation.

In this way, Gojo isn't mentally weak. He didn't abandon society and everyone who loved him, instead choosing to hone the trauma of his isolated childhood into a weapon and teach the next generation to be better than himself. He isn't depressed, but he isn't happy. You can't be happy if you're alone all of the time. He hoped Megumi could be someone to stand by him, but in the end, he failed to save Megumi. His strength couldn't save him, just as it couldn't save Geto.

He isn't mentally strong. He isn't weak, either. He is horribly, painfully average. He's not weak enough to be saved, but not strong enough to save others. His childhood plagues him, but not to the point where it prevents him from living. He killed Geto but was unable to bury the body. Gojo is everything he never wanted to be.

As it turns out, strength can't buy you happiness. Gojo may have understood that, but he couldn't abandon it, even to the bitter end. Just as a human struggles to shed their conditioning. Not everyone can break the cycle, but we are always trying our best to work with what we've been dealt.

3. Okkotsu Yuuta

I'm putting Yuuta in between Gojo & Geto and Itadori & Megumi because he is, in a way, a bridge between the two. Geto and Gojo have lived their lives; their stories are complete and ended in tragedy. Itadori and Megumi's are not. They are still actively struggling and fighting their physical and mental battles; their stories have yet to be completed.

Yuuta's story isn't technically completed (ignoring everything that happened in the recent chapter with him for the sake of MY mental health), he is still a success story. He is the average protagonist who started from the bottom and ended up at the top. Only he, as Gege has done time and time again, has a slightly stronger focus on mental health than most other Shonen. He is success where Gojo & Geto failed, and the success that Itadori & Megumi are narratively striving for.

At the beginning, Yuuta was depressed and suicidal. He was bullied at school and involuntarily hurting others. Instead of becoming resentful of the world, he pushed all of the vileness inward. His guilt caused him to try to take his life, presumably multiple times, but Rika stopped him before he could succeed. His life was effectively out of his hands; he felt powerless with all of the bodies stacking around him, and he couldn't atone for "his" actions.

His mental health, as it was, was in shambles. Gojo then offered him a way forward. Yuuta's mental health did not improve overnight. It was when he made friends at Jujutsu High, and developed a support system, that he was able to relieve his anxiety and realize that life is not so bad after all. That all of this pain and suffering and loss - it will pass.

The most important thing to acknowledge when it comes to Yuuta is the sheer fact that he was not alone, nor did he allow himself to be alone. Unlike Gojo, who still had Shoko and Nanami after Geto left but refused to connect with them, Yuuta allowed himself to get close to those around him. They didn't know the suffering he'd undergone for so many years. They didn't know what it was like to be him, but that was okay. He knew that they had empathy, that even though they could never experience his life, they could still be there for him now when he falls.

When given the opportunity to surrender, Yuuta stands in the face of one Geto Suguru and swears to protect his friends and fight with Rika. He's so far removed from the boy who tried to kill himself at the beginning of the manga, and that's because he let himself be changed. He did not succumb. He had friends, he knew. People that would miss him if he left, and people whom he would regret leaving.

This stays consistent with his character. He doesn't let himself become isolated in his strength or his experiences. He's much stronger than everyone else in the room, he's a special grade and he knows that, but he still treats everyone like they are equals. Like they are his friends, like they are people who could share this burden of existence with him. This is something that Gojo couldn't accomplish, which lends to the fact that Gojo had a very off-hand teaching method when it came to mentoring Yuuta. Instead of influencing him under this idea of strength conquers all, he let Yuuta develop far away from the ideals of the Japanese Jujutsu Society.

And, in the end, the fact of him being physically strong - a special-grade sorcerer from the get-go - never helped him in his mental health. In fact, it made him miserable until he learned to get a handle on Rika. His winning or losing that fight with Geto wasn't the point of his character, it was reckoning with the fact that he is okay now. That he can embrace the ugly part of him with dignity instead of guilt.

4. Itadori Yuuji

Itadori's entire character is that he has an unbreakable spirit. As the only one who can bear the soul of Sukuna, he started off like Yuuta, only on the opposite end of the mental health spectrum. When we first see him, he's happy, spending his afternoons with the Occult Club and watching movies.

... What happened?

Like Geto, everything piled on very slowly. So slow that I'm not even sure he felt the true effects of everything he experienced up until the fall of Shibuya. It starts with the death of grandfather, whose parting words "Just save as many people as you can" haunt him even now during the final fight with Sukuna. He was never given time to properly grieve his grandfather, just as he never had time to grieve the brother curses, Junpei, Nanami, Nobara, Gojo, Higurama. At the end of it all, when the fighting is over, I have to wonder what will become of the boy that realizes he's lost most of the people he loved.

The one time he did try to process it, when he realized that he couldn't control Sukuna, was when he broke down in Shibuya. Sukuna leveled an entire city. For the boy who never wanted to kill another human being for fear of devaluing life, the weight of his weakness killing thousands was crushing. Then Nanami died. Nobara died (still hanging onto that unknown status but I digress). Both are right in front of him, and powerless to prevent Mahito from disintegrating their bodies. So, obviously, Itadori broke down. The boy with the unshakeable spirit, the only person who could contain the King of Curses, has his psyche completely shattered.

He laid on the ground, and he wouldn't have gotten back up if there wasn't somebody to help him, to be there with him. Todo pulled him back together, stitched back up the broken into somebody who has allies and people to fight for. Itadori has the success that Yuuta had, only Itadori did not come out of it with better mental health.

After the breakdown, his unshakeable spirit was nothing more than the will to keep fighting. He cares little for himself, and he tries to distance himself from people to prevent them from dying from his cursed hands. He is jumping, quickly, down the same rabbit hole that Geto fell down. One big event, and they realize just how tall the pile already is, and that it will never stop growing. Unlike Geto, however, he continues to get overbearing support from those around him. Against his will. He can't push them away, for they refuse to leave his side. Yuuta, Choso, Megumi, even Higurama. They won't let him fall. This makes him better off than someone alone, in a sense. He can withstand his trauma when others may not.

Even so, even so, there is only so much support, the lack of self-isolation, can do when the traumas keep actively repeating. When he says that he will gladly die to defeat Sukuna, it is not said with the same tone that another Shonen protagonist would say it. Take Naruto for example. If he were to go into a battle to protect, say, Sasuke, he would scream, "I'll die to protect him." We understand that his willpower is stronger than his self-preservation, but we don't get the idea that he actively wants to die. He'll die if he has to. Now, Itadori says the same thing, but about saving Megumi. He says, "I'll gladly die." There is something different. His willpower is leaps and bounds stronger than his self-preservation, but that's not only it. There is an undercurrent of severe suicidal ideation prevalent in Itadori's tone. It's not that he will die to win, it's that a part of him wants for this to be his final fight. For it all to be over. To save Megumi, then atone for the sin of being too weak to save Shibuya, or being unable to stop the Culling Games, or letting Megumi get hurt when all he wanted was to keep him safe.

I'd call it more along the lines of passive suicidal ideation. He doesn't plan to kill himself, but what would it mean for him to go into dangerous situations without protection? What would it mean for him to succumb to his wounds after he wakes Megumi's soul and kills Sukuna? To not even try to seek medical attention? He's guilty. He believes everything that happened in Shibuya and after is his fault. When faced with the executioner's sword, he was ready to die for his sins, if not for the goal of ending the Games. There is a fine line between willing to die for those you love versus wanting to die for those you love.

Right now, Itadori is fighting to save one person, like his grandfather said. He is not fighting to survive. And that's what people fail to understand about Itadori when they compare him to the other members of the cast. These power-scaling dudebros don't understand that their favorite OP main character has fallen apart at the seams, that his unshakeable spirit to save people doesn't include himself.

5. Fushiguro Megumi

Here we finally come to the question: Why can Itadori take it when Megumi can't? There is a very similar quote that you probably think of whenever you hear this question asked. It's from The Outsiders: "Dally is tougher than I am. Why can I take it when Dally can't?" The answer to this question that Ponyboy gives is the same we can attribute to Megumi. "And then I knew. Johnny was the only thing Dally loved. And now Johnny was gone."

The entire reason Megumi became a Jujutsu sorcerer was to protect his sister. When he was five years old and probably too young to understand most of the words Gojo said, he accepted the offer of training to become a sorcerer in exchange for Tsumiki's happiness. Every day, he fought to protect her. He only had one goal in entering the Culling Games: to prevent Tsumiki from having to participate.

It's easy to attribute Megumi's constant attempts at summoning Mahoraga to a lack of will to live - suicidal ideation, the same that Itadori now experiences. On one hand, I do understand that he has a fundamental lack of care for his own life, but on the other, I don't think that he intends to throw it all away every single time. He just didn't know any better. Ignorance can lead to death as easily as intentionally seeking it out. That's why he changes his habit after Gojo gives him a lesson in risking death versus dying to win; Megumi still has someone to live for, after all.

Megumi's mental health was already rocky from the start. Not that it was in shambles like Yuuta, but he wasn't fully stable. Like a lot of teenagers, he's moody, somewhat reclusive, and only really likes one or two people maximum. Teenagers aren't known for their sunshine mental health anyway.

Megumi was given time to grieve Itadori after he first died. This trauma of losing him in front of his eyes stuck with him, but he was allowed a grace period of two months to grieve with Nobara. He experienced Shibuya, too, but he still had that one important person to protect. His mental health was alright at this point, all things considered. As long as his sister was alive, he would be fine.

Sukuna knew this. So Sukuna killed Tsumiki using only the Ten Shadows Teqchnique. The one person Megumi spent his whole life dedicated to, was killed by his own cursed technique, his own failure to suppress Sukuna.

In the void of his soul, Megumi was alone. Truly, utterly alone. The only person nearby was Sukuna, the murderer of his sister, the murderer of thousands upon thousands of people. He drowned in the ceremonial bath of crushed curses to hold his soul down in the depths of despair, literally drenched in all of the vileness the world has to offer. Sukuna killed Gojo using Mahoraga's adaption ability, and before that, Megumi was forced to take several of Gojo's mind-altering domain expansions.

Already, he had given up. He gave up when his sister died, but the rest ground a pointed spur into his neck. When Itadori shakes his soul, Megumi is repeating, "That's enough." He was at the end of his rope a long time ago. What more is there to keep living for? He doesn't want to live with the blood of his sister, the blood of the man who practically raised him, and the blood of countless others drenching his hands.

Sukuna killed all of these people, not Megumi. But then, Sukuna killed of those people in Shibuya, not Itadori. Why can Itadori take it? Why can he keep fighting when Megumi lays broken on the ground? Itadori wasn't alone. And Megumi has never been known for his unshakeable spirit. That is the one thing that Itadori can hold over everybody else, the one trait that everyone admires. He was born to shoulder the burden of the world. Megumi wasn't. Megumi wants to die. He is not passively suicidal, for he has no goals left to complete, a plan to die within the body no longer inhabited alone. He is suicidal. He would drive a stake through his heart if it meant relieving his pain. He doesn't want to do it anymore. He's had enough.

And Itadori was in this position once, too? Perhaps not as directly, but he was there. Here is the moment that the protagonist gives the motivating speech to will someone to keep fighting, that life is worth living. I realized today that this is not something Itadori has done yet. He hasn't had a grand speech that's not been about his own willpower. He's never encouraged someone else to keep living in the way that you would expect from the main character. This is his moment, I suppose. He needs to be the person for Megumi that Todo was for him. He has to show Megumi that he isn't alone.

He needs to save Megumi when, all those years ago, Gojo couldn't save Geto.

I don't think some of this fanbase understands how horrible Gege has to be at writing if he just. Let Megumi get up to fight in Chapter 251. All this time, he has shown how Megumi has been defeated. He showed him crumbled on the ground, unmoving. It shouldn't be a surprise that all of the measures Sukuna took to ensnare Megumi's soul worked. Megumi is suicidal after the people he loves have all died because of his technique. God forbid a sixteen-year-old is unable to cope with his trauma alone.

Honorable Mentions:

There are a lot more characters in this story that represent/show mental illness that I didn't go into depth on but are worth mentioning. It was easier to only talk about the major characters since we spend so much time with them and I can fully flesh out everything that should/can be said about them. Anyway, here are a few more that are notably well-written in their mental struggles:

Yoshino Junpei. His story arc follows very similarly to Geto, except he is the bullied student I was making a reference to. Depressed, alone with a mother whose habits he can't stand, he turned to someone he thought could provide him a better life. Interestingly, he is a good representation of the type of children that tend to be groomed. That's surely what happened to him. Mahito used him, then discarded him for his own gains.

Ieiri Shoko. Her main struggle can be seen through her smoking habits. She's been through a lot, lost so many people, and has to keep healing sorcerers only for them to die. Eventually, she was able to come to terms with this. She kicked her smoking habit at the same time she kicked the vicious mental cycle of caring too much about the patient on her table. It's no wonder she picked up a cigarette, for the first time in a while, when Geto led the phantom parade.

Zenin Maki. She works as a very good contrast to Megumi. They both lost their sisters, the people they loved the most, but she turned all of her grief to killing the Zenin clan and gaining Heavenly Restriction. But this, this is because she could do so. There is simply nothing Megumi can do as a soul trapped in his own body. Her grief made her stronger, while for most, it made them weaker.

Inumaki Toge. He isn't seen a lot, but his story is ultimately quite compelling. A boy who hurt many when he was young. He turned his guilt into kindness, a will to protect. He tends a garden to raise plants healthily, for God's sake. He's one of the examples that shows Yuuta that your past actions don't define you, but instead, what you choose to do going forward.

I am not proofreading any of this before I post it. Sorry if it is borderline unreadable with spelling / grammatical errors.

[thefirstlioveyou]

"The Last Lie," as the final variation of "The First Lie," why it would be the perfect title

+ the importance of the the songs

(before anything: yes. i know. "it's literally just a song title." but obviously the song is important to the duffers if they wanted multiple versions to put in each season. this song is insight to what's not always being verbalized. the series of this song contains themes of queerness, romantic love, self-discovery, honesty and acceptance. all of it is meaningful and that includes the title pattern that's going on.)

ok so this is gonna be very much a rambling post.

but i was thinking of all the variations of "the first lie," and how the final one is most definitely gonna be for byler, or related to it in some way.

so far we've got... The First Lie (jancy) // The First I love You (mlvn s3 kiss, robin's coming out) // Being Different (Will's Monologue, 3:20-4:29)// Jopper scene S4

(yes. jopper has their own variation! you can tell by the lack of bass, extra added synths and different build up that it's a different version... i'm just not sure why it wasn't included in the soundtrack.)

i got bored and began thinking what the title would be if it were to be for byler.

i've noticed many people suggest to capitalize the 'L' in 'love' to prove that mike's love for will is something real, where as it wasn't for el.

i guess they could do that.

but... that requires them to say that phrase. and i really don't think mike and will are gonna say that to begin with, nor would i want that.

in the stranger things universe, "i love you" has only been a phrase used platonically or by failed relationships. the show really loves to depict love by actions or with other words. they enforce the theme "actions speak louder than words" with their relationships.

in real life, it's important to hear those words 'i love you.' however this is a fictional story that's crafted with precise choices to send an underlying message to the audience. so going by that this means that in this fictional world, el shouldn't need to hear mike say it. no other couple in the show had this issue other than stancy, and well.. you know how that ended up. bullshit.

mike and el had this issue because they don't love each other that way. the desire to hear it comes from none other than their codependency. they rely on each other to have some form of identity or purpose, slowly destructing who they really are in the process.

so while i understand why some may want mike to say 'i love you,' the point is he shouldn't have to say it. his actions should be enough to prove it, if we're following along the themes this narrative is trying to display.

his actions fall flat, and will continue to. although his actions ARE signs he CARES about her, their relationship has no chemistry and especially compatibility. there is no actual romantic love. just unhealthy attachment.

will feels better about himself, he feels loved as a whole, not just as mike's potential partner. mike makes him feel better for being different... but when has mike ever said anything specifically like that? he's never sat down and said, "hey, it's okay to be different." it's mike's actions that make him feel that way. mike's love for will is already being said without actually saying it, just like the other endgame ships. it's following the active theme.

and yeah it can get confusing.. because we're in the pov of will, who thinks it's unrequited... we lost mike's pov... mike's with el.. but the show is deliberately trying to make the audience (at least the heteronormative-blinded part) MISS it, so it can be a whole twist and all that and continue to enforce the theme they're going for.

and let's say the word 'love' is used, i think it'd be used in the context of a letter (ex: love, mike). i just really don't think they will make them say "i love you" if no other endgame couple has before. it disrupts the theme.

now, if not "The First I Love you," then what would be a good title?

personally, i like the idea of "The Last Lie."

why?

because mike needs to stop fucking lying to himself and denying his homosexual desire for his childhood best friend and stop pretending like that dragon poster isn't gay as fuck

no but, THINK ABOUT IT. (this is about to get severely cheesy and probably cringe inducing and i'm sorry)

imagine it. thee byler kiss scene, or whatever it ends up being (but it has to be related to them in some way). this is the moment in which mike finally confronts his truth and accepts it. he isn't bullshitting who he is anymore - being gay, his interests, his true personality.

the 'normal' boy who he tried so hard being... the 'normal' boy he risked his friendships and the love of his life just to be... the 'normal' boy that doesn't enjoy nerdy games... the 'normal' boy who he masked behind just to live a lie.

whether it's by words or a kiss, he's finally letting that lie of a boy go the moment he shares his love for will. and in those seconds of time, it's almost like a promise to himself that 'normal' boy would be the last lie he'll ever try to live again

i fucking love characters who break their own moral code. that's mike - the character that enforced telling the truth and being honest to those you care about, and still ended up being a liar all along.

and it's not even that mike's relearning "friends don't lie." no. he already gets that. we already get that. you're free to disagree here, but what i personally get from mike's overall character is that there will always be an inability to be truthful to others if you can't be truthful to yourself first. mike must live his live authentically and stay true to who he is and what defines him if he wants happiness. otherwise, the lie he digs himself into will only get bigger and bigger, and inevitably will destroy what's important to him (his relationships in this case) and himself.

all this... it already fits the themes the other song variations have been displayed in:

acceptance of a love and finally letting it in -> jancy/jopper

coming out and speaking your truth -> robin

queerness -> robin, mike, will

self-discovery -> mike

just imagine all of those themes just smashed into one title and scene. that track would carry so much meaningful weight.

Ok

maybe this post was just my secret love letter to those songs. but am i really crazy for caring about them? soundtracks in film/tv deserve more love! that little melody is clearly so important to the story, the way the titles it transitions through and what it tells us. i just think it's genuinely brilliant how they managed to do that with one instrumental. that's storytelling!!

ok i'm done now thank you kyle dixon & michael stein. ur my fave bylers

[portsandstars]

Revisiting Red Spring Studio's Interview with Blerdy Otome - Select Quotes

It's been almost a year since RSS had this interview, but I think that many people have not listened to it, or recently revisited it. I thought I'd highlight some quotes from it, though the entire interview is worth watching! Some of these quotes I have lightly modified for clarity or succinctness but the majority are direct transcripts.

23:30: "Touchstarved is a horror romance visual novel where the entire cast is made up of characters where you're like, "I can fix them!" but you actually can't. I think that Touchstarved is a very complex and mature story with really really complex themes and interwoven routes and obviously it's very sexy at the same it's a romance - and I think it's one of those games that I've always wanted to see exist and I think that a lot of the team has always wanted to see this game exist as far as being this kind of like dark, broody, moody, but also very deep, right, and authentic and honest exploration - Monsters, and the feeling of being a monster - feeling of being an "other", right, whether you're queer or POC or anything like that… we've created a game that's not only really fun and action-packed and bloody and all that kind of stuff… but very heartfelt in a way that I hope readers can pick up on.

Imo, this line of reasoning ("you can't fix them", and the cast's monstrous nature and how it intrinsically ties to/is an analogy for being queer, or POC) - makes me think that even in the good endings for the game, your character won't be minimizing the character's monstrousness. For example, even if your character has the Power of True Love, it's not going to make Vere nonviolent or absolve Kuras's guilt.

25:35: "These themes are pretty complicated in a way that's messy and honestly bloody and I think for that reason is why we're looking at a mature rating - that said, when we set out to make the game our goal wasn't really to be explicit, it was much more to focus on sexiness . . ."

Just clarifying that there won't be explicit sex scenes in the game.

28:55: "What are some aspects of the story that you are most excited to showcase?" "I'm so excited that people get to die terribly, that just gets me so pumped up. Like in previous jobs I have not been allowed to brutally murder . . . main characters permanently and it's very important to me that I now have the power to write really just messed up awful endings…Don't worry, there's also good endings there too, they just get as much passion and all that stuff as the bad endings… but the bad endings, oh my gosh, those are some of my favorites."

This line makes me curious about whether the main characters are just MC, or if the other characters will brutally die as well!

30:50 "A little while ago we posted Kuras's character reveal and people really like the fact that he can't cook so for me it's really cute and innocent seeing people obsess over that fact and I really just want them to see the contrast between that version of Kuras in their head and what he's actually like in his route. Like I just really want to see them react to like the terrible things he's going to do. . . They're all awful in different ways that I'm really excited for people to see it - it's very funny to see everyone be like _Literally name any of the characters of the cast and be like "they're my little meow meow" and it's like, oh. good. I hope this continues once they learn more about the characters. Obviously they're all wonderful - right, the characters are all awful but they're also all wonderful".

32:26 : "the theme of monstrousness and how each character kind of approaches it differently . . . because they're all monsters, even if they're not literally monsters . . .it also plays into each character's brand of horror in their own way as well that ties into their monstrous nature."

This line especially (to me) hints at how Leander is likely not SPECIFICALLY a monster, but a human with a monstrous nature.

34:30: - Ais was the first character they made and each of the other characters build upon him, so they spent a lot of time getting him right. Vere was the easiest to create and they made him in a weekend. Kuras was the hardest to create (especially visually).

38:00 "This is a romance game and a big draw of the game is making a love connection with these characters - do you all plan on including platonic friendship routes in addition to romance routes, or is it strictly romance?" The way that we planned out this game is that we wanted to focus on the intimacy of these individual relationships between the main character and the love interest and the route that they're on, right, so this is the way we had planned the game from the beginning. We really like poly romances, for example, and friendships, but we think that it wouldn't have made much sense for the characters in the story that we had written for them because this entire story - with who the main character is and why they're having to turn to these mysterious monstrous strangers - there's a level of intimacy involved in the themes and stories that we really focused on for how we're writing…

It's almost like a narrative design intentionality we did early on because each route that you'll be able to play from the main five cast is very driven and each character is like a ticking time bomb in their own way. So if you choose to romance Vere, Kuras's route still continues and you can see the effects of what not choosing Kuras is in Vere's route when you're playing Vere's route. So the world is meant to be very interwoven and interconnected where you can see the ripples of everyone's choices even when you're not romancing them and in that way we've designed this cast that's woven together. So if we did want to do a poly route, we would probably have to do entirely new characters . ."

43:30: "One of the fundamental goals of this game was to have, as you've been saying, a living world - a world that's evolving, and one of the ways that we wanted to communicate that was with the idea that these characters are not doing great… um, they're all in very very bad situations, uh, they're all essentially doomed if you do not go with them and it's seeing that carried out in each route that I hope will be really interesting for people.. it will be very sad, in a good way".

ARGHHH this is the WORST. This means that if you choose a character, you're essentially dooming the others. Though this will undoubtedly manufacture delicious angst, I'm soooo sad at imagining each of the other characters faltering and ultimately failing on their paths because you didn't chose them. Though, I wonder if there are some routes where multiple characters turn out ok, or if the entire cast is doomed as soon as you don't select them (in different ways depending on the route)?

54:30: "I also want to clarify too that even though we've been talking about blood a lot and all that kind of stuff and death and we love those parts of the story, um, if you get those endings there's a reason why, you know what I'm saying - you have to actively try to get those endings - poke the bear with a stick."

Definitely referencing Vere's bad ending in the demo. Personally I am too curious to avoid them, but it's encouraging that some of the MC deaths appear to be because you deliberately make dangerous choices, rather than simply "tricking" the player and surprising them.

Let me know what you think of these quotes, and the whole interview is definitely worth a watch if you haven't seen it!

[angelickisscs]

trent jealousy!

nothing else matters ~ trent alexander-arnold

୨ ୧ ˚₊ pairing ~ trent alexander-arnold x reader

summary: sharing a friend group with your ex is not the most practical thing ever

a/n: this is awful sorry but i got desperate to post something

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO you, happy birthday dear Maya."

Birthdays had alwaysbeen a momentous occasion throughout the longevity of your group’s friendship. Out of the 365 days that built up the full year, each of you always made sure to make the special day centred around that singular important someone.

No matter what had happened throughout the days leading up to it, on those days, nothing else mattered.

Or at least that was what had spiralled around your mind. It had created its own staircase over the several hours you had recited that to yourself, creating space for the next set of the recurring words.

It had claimed more control than it could deal with, the size of boots it had picked being far too large. You had kept yourself so busy that you were in and out of consciousness, the chair you had strategically placed yourself behind being the only thing keeping you standing at that moment in time.

Maya blew out the candles with a smile bigger than you believed she could fit on her face. The Mamma Mia themed cake that she had non-stop talked about for the majority of last year that continued until only two weeks ago, sat placed in front of her.

Your two other friends had done the honour of brining it out towards her, shielding the candles with their hands to keep the wind from doing what it had threatened to that whole night.

“Thank you, thank you!” She squealed loudly, looking to everyone crowded around her with

such gratefulness that it was a high possibility she could explode.

His hand landed on your lower back whilst he adjusted himself from his seated position to your left so he could properly look at you.

The action caught your attention quicker than it would usually as it did the same for the man sat next to the birthday girl. His eyes held a certain weight to them, locking onto you with such a strong unreadable emotion that it soaked its venom into every inch of your innocent flesh.

“You alright?” Ben asked you, trying everything he could so he could look you directly in the eye. By the time he had officially managed to, his body sat at such an unnatural position it would be no surprise if he would end up texting you to complain about the back pain he had ‘randomly’ picked up.

“Me? Yes, yeah. Awesome.” Your voice was an approximate three octaves higher than you would usually reach, the need to get away from the male species reaching heights that could challenge Mount Everest.

He smiled sweetly at your response, “That’s good.”

Mustering a smile to respond with, you began to excuse yourself from around the table. It only took creating the ruse that was grabbing something from your car for people to accept your absence for a matter of minutes.

You inhaled the icy air that ran its fingertips across the usual soggy atmosphere the second you exited the house. The air that had once surrounded you was becoming heavy, slowly creating a dangerously shallow ability to breathe. It forced you to suffer its wrath the harshest, the desperate gasps that escaped from you making that painfully evident.

Your lips felt moments away from becoming numb despite the very few seconds you had spend in the outdoors.

The ground was slightly damp beneath your harsh steps. The dew of impending snow that the news had warned everyone about weakening everything around. Even as you subjected the innocent spikes of grass to the vicious murder spree that was your heels, they laid limp, crushing and bleeding under the spears.

It was a deep sapphire that painted the sky in that moment, echoing with the sounds of blackbirds singing and everyone’s shouts of celebration. The bird’s voices resounding through the freezing air, coating every exhale with icicles that pierced deep into your uncovered skin.

Swinging open your car door, you leant in to grab the singular object you had left the comfort of your friends’ house for. A jacket.

Why would you need it whilst being inside? You couldn’t give an acceptable answer.

“Hey.” A voice snuck up from behind you, sending you flying upwards to hit your head on the hardest part of your car. “Sorry! I was really trying not to scare you.”

You placed your hand atop of the injury site, flinching it away the second your fingers hovered ever so slightly near it, the pain being far too harsh at that moment. “Ben. You really can’t be doing that.”

His hands lingered around his grimaced face. The guilt was evident however every small thing that led up to this specific interaction had left your patience thinner than average.

“I was really hoping to catch you alone tonight. I need to talk to you about something.” Ben took a step closer towards you.

“I-I really have to get back inside. Maybe another time?”

Ben was quick to refuse the alternative you had kindly given, another step being taken towards you. The car stood its ground firmly, leaving only another two steps before an uncomfortable amount of distance between the two of you was yet to be cleared.

He took a deep breath, using up any extra air on which you could rely. “I like someone, and I was thinking that you could help me out with that.”

Closing your eyes momentarily, you regained the composure that you could grasp at.

“Oh! Who? Do I know them?” You coated your voice with fawned interest.

“Very well.”

The pure fluffiness of the clouds that hung confidently in the sky was evidence towards why people compared it to candy floss. They looked edible, comfortable even. A necessary escape from the direction the conversation was heading in.

“Is it Maya? You know what, I’ve always thought you would be cute together.” Throwing the jacket over your shoulders to lessen the blow of his upcoming words, you diverted your gaze elsewhere.

Flowers surrounded the building you had just exited, no protection offered for when severe weather decided to make its name for itself. They sat susceptible to whatever the universe threw at them.

“No, you know here a lot better than that.” Another dreaded step.

“Olivia? She’s actually-.” An emergency plan began forming in your head, the large red button that had appeared in the back of your mind when you had broken up with Trent had been pressed.

“Do I know her?”

His voice was more angelic than you had ever heard before, the shadow his figure casted against the man in front of you causing a small lack in vision.

Ben turned around to meet him face to face, taking away your access to see what was happening on his overly expressive face. His shoulders seemed to tense, his back straightening as though he was becoming prey.

“I’m just going to go. I’ll see you inside y/n?” His voice was frigid as the words that he spoke seemed to crumble upon meeting with the harsh gaze that welcomed them once they exited their safehouse. You felt a soft pang of guilt ripple throughout your body as you stood there, unable to do anything but send him a sorrowful smile as he made his long-awaited exit.

Trent was soon filling his empty space, leaving you with no chance to escape from him in the same way. A soft flurry of smoke felt over his lips. The suit he was wearing was warm, brandished with deep cologne that seemed to climb up your figure, lacking any effort in doing so. The few buttons that were originally sculpted to cover the first part of his chest were left undone, showing off the golden chain he had placed around his neck.

“I thought that you might be out here.” His response rolled from his lips as if it were a part of the trickling wind passing by.

Nodding your head, you didn’t bother to speak your response. Though the situation you had previously found yourself in was bad enough, this surpassed it very quickly. One thing was certain for today, the world was not spinning in your favour.

The world fell quiet again, immersing you in a void of silence that was so strong it began to shake your body. With Trent standing next you, his broad figure looking so lost amongst the mixture of trees going on behind him, it was becoming increasingly hard to think.

“I’ve been wanting to speak to you as well. But he can’t seem to leave your side.”

A scoff fell past your lips, the wind quick to snatch it from in front of you and run away with it.

“I can’t do this today.” You responded in a hardly audible whisper, using it as an excuse to excuse yourself yet again. Trent was quick to react to your movements, his fingertips offering you the warmth you had been craving. The world stopped without delay; you await a reasonable response, but nothing appeared.

His knuckles wrapped so tightly it caused a bleed of a ghastly white to flush across them. Trent’s lip parted, preparing themselves to say something that would stop you from leaving him but the only thing that slipped past them was a loud sigh.

“I was beginning to think the two of you were together.” He finally admitted, his shoulders slumping in a makeshift relief.

You rolled your eyes, taking a millimetre of a step back just to feel as though you had put any form of distance between the two of you, “That’s none of your business. Not anymore.”

The lingering space between you disappeared within seconds, his head leaning in to seal the deal.

“I wish it still was.” Trent’s words were fast to process in her mind, his lips practically kissing your ear every time he spoke from closeness, the warmth that exited with every letter crawling down you.

Exhaling a deep breath, your eyes brought themselves upwards to stare at the sky. His presence was enough to start a civil war within you. The two sides argued relentlessly as to whether you should let him back in. Both failed the simple task that was giving a reasonable argument for their actions which consequently left you in a vulnerable situation.

Every muscle in your body came together in full cooperation to lift your arms up to move him away from you and even then, they fell flat against his hardened chest. It was such a small action, one that to most would mean nothing. But to him, to him it gave him every ounce of permission that he was asking for.

His lips were gentle across your collarbone, a stepping stone to getting you right where he would want you. You could feel him smirk against your skin as your head lulled to the side to make sure he had full access.

“Okay, I would find it much better if we were to talk.” Seemingly coming to your senses, you watched as he looked up towards you with the most convincing puppy eyes you had ever caught sight of.

Trent didn’t move whilst he watched you, a playful glint catching onto the moonlight, “What if I don’t want to talk anymore?”

“That would be perfect because I don’t want too either.”

[autistichalsin]

@mewhoismyself reminded me of an excellent, important point, in their reply to this post; they said

Doesn’t Halsin only refer to his drow captors as *captors* if the player threatens to send him back? Like- that’s so sad!! And a lot of players would completely miss it if they were trying to romance and *be nice* to him! Such a price for healing...! ;-;

And yes, you are absolutely correct!

In all other dialogue paths, Halsin continues to refer to them as hosts, or he talks around it. The closest he gets is saying "the house that held me" fell out of favor and was attacked. Only if the player (who must be a Lolth Drow for this option to appear) chooses "so the mighty bear is an escaped pet, then. I wonder if there is a reward for your return..." does Halsin acknowledge them as captors, immediately snapping, "you would be unwise to attempt it, trust me. In any case, the house of my captors is long-extinct. Interesting... part of me still thought of them as hosts, but I suppose captors is indeed more accurate."

This is interesting, because it carries a lot of implications- but what sticks out to me is that this is both a very real and relatable thing for a lot of survivors, and something that never gets talked about. So many of us walk around with internalized self-blaming attitudes, but then... something hits different when you hear someone else verbalize those deep, painful, hurtful things. Human instinct is to protect oneself from those kinds of accusations, and so it is for Halsin, and the threat breaks something. Because it's one thing to tell himself that they were simply hosts and that what happened wasn't that bad, but it's another for someone else to say it and take it a step further by threatening to send him back.

It breaks through something, in the worst way. By making the threat, the player has made it Real again. It's not a distant memory anymore, and it's not something he can make into a comfortable fantasy; it's a real threat now, even if they are dead, because now someone knows and has indicated they would send him to face it again, given the chance*. By making it Real, Halsin is now forced to see the situation for what it was, but he pretended wasn't for all these years; that his life was in peril, that he suffered, that he didn't want it, and that he was a captive, not a guest, not a novelty.

The only way to get Halsin to admit what his captors were is to threaten him and trigger him, which is truly heartbreaking. It's like how one of the ways to get Halsin to show the depths of his care for the player/their relationship, and his real emotions, the most is by acting in an emotionally abusive manner by repeatedly saying they want to break up with him, and then changing his mind; doing this is one of the few times Halsin will show his hurt at the player's hurtful actions, as after the first time, he'll start saying things like, "does it please you to see me look crestfallen? That is the only reason I can think of that you might toy with my heart like this," and "perhaps you care less for me than I supposed..." and "why would you test my patience like this? Sometimes, it is difficult to love you."

Here, too, one of the only ways to make Halsin express that he is hurt, and that the player is wrong in hurting him, and that he does NOT deserve and should not have to accept such treatment, (and one of the few ways to make him lose significant amounts of approval at once, besides committing literal murder, and one of the rare times this is on his own behalf) is by acting cruel and abusive to him. He will quietly and stoically accept so much other cruel treatment, but this is one of those rare times you can see what a deeply vulnerable person he is. It's a recurring theme with him, and it's heartbreaking; "does it please you to see me look crestfallen?" made me tear up.

There is a subtext to that statement- just as there is for "sometimes, I think people look at me and imagine my feelings cannot be hurt." This isn't the kind of statement that comes out of nowhere. This is what arises after being hurt. Quite possibly more than once. Halsin has likely been deeply hurt by people he loved and trusted before.

There's so many layers of sadness to Halsin's character, both in the plot and in a meta sense. The way there's so many heavy implications of him being let down by so many people, affecting his attachment style, and yet that there's so few chances to validate and comfort and reassure him over this, is one of the saddest parts to me. Instead, we get far more chances to be cruel than kind, and most of his most raw, powerful character moments come when the player is cruel. It's brilliant writing, but it makes my heart ache.

*This, the monstrosity of that dialogue choice and the way Halsin acts, is why I am nearly-offended that Halsin doesn't break up with the player on the spot if they choose this option; he doesn't even lose approval. I feel that he should lose at LEAST 10 approval, to match him losing 5 approval for every time (after the first) the player starts to break up with him him and then changes their mind. I love the updated scene to bits, it fixes so many of the mistakes that they made at first, but I feel like saying something this horrible to Halsin should cause him to end things between them immediately.

[lesinquietes]

Summary: With Dynamight’s help, you solved the crime. He isn’t quite finished with you yet, though.

Adult!Bakugou x Forensic Detective!Reader

⚠️ fluff. suggestive themes.

I Previous l Next l

You close the manila folder on your desk and lean back in your chair. A breathy, content sigh leaves your lips. The case has been solved. The evidence has been retained. All that’s left is to file the associated documents. Then, you can head home for the evening. Another job well done.

You gaze out at the cityscape. The sunset sprays beams of brilliant yellow and orange towards your office building, reflecting off the large glass windows. The streets are busy with people and cars. Soon, you’ll join the bustle, conforming for the sake of commuting home.

Sometimes, when you sit here like this, you consider how small everyone is compared to the rest of the universe. Most actions that seem supermassive are actually minuscule and insignificant. In the grand scheme of things, you wonder if the job you’re doing makes a difference. Maybe not wide scale, but arguably, Japan could stand to be safer. Heroes do a lot of the rounding up these days, but you think local detective work is still important.

“Hey.”

You perk up. Speak of the devil.

You glance away from the view to greet Katsuki Bakugou, the hero who spent his time protecting you throughout your most recent case. He’s leaning against the door, arms folded arrogantly over his chest. At once, a smile graces your mouth. As soon as you submitted your conclusion about the primary suspect — with enough evidence, to boot — the Captain of your force implored Bakugou to make an arrest. Of course, the rowdy blonde didn’t capture the villain without beating him to a bloody pulp first. Normally, you wouldn’t condone such behaviour; however, given that the murderer targeted random women every time he killed, you can turn a blind eye. Men like that don’t deserve mercy.

You adjust your position so that you’re sitting upright. You know he doesn’t care; you’re not sure why you do. When you’re satisfied, you raise your fists in the air and reply.

“We did it!”

The exhaustion woven into your words isn’t missed. Since gathering that first sample at the initial crime scene, you haven’t stopped working. He admires your drive to do what’s right.

“Yeah,” he grunts. “Plenty more where that came from, though.”

“True.” You acknowledge, climbing to your feet. “But that’s one down.”

And Katsuki can’t argue with that. In fact, Katsuki finds he can seldom argue with you. It’s not that you’re always right; he thinks it’s because he likes listening to the sound of your voice. It’s unique. It’s calming. It’s something about you that he’s grown excessively fond of.

At last, he enters your office, like a moth drawn to fire. He’s still dressed in his hero garb. You notice there aren’t any scuffs on his pristine skin, indicating that his battle was rather one-sided. This is the first time you’re seeing him after the arrest. Everyone knows he doesn’t talk to the News team unless he has to; reporting to the public falls on the officers assisting his cases.

“You alright?” He asks, watching from a short distance as you gather your belongings.

“Definitely.” You verify. “You?”

“Whatever.”

That’s a yes. He doesn’t like to be upfront with his feelings. You’re beginning to understand his cues, though. It’s a shame this is the end of your time together; you would have liked to continue figuring him out. Perhaps another high-profile case will pop up and he’ll be assigned to you again. You can’t lie — you’re hoping for that to happen a little harder than you should be.

You throw on your windbreaker and take your knapsack in your hand. He hasn’t moved an inch from the front of your desk. It’s as if he’s been glued in place. The only part of him that’s visibly moving are his deep crimson eyes. He’s fixated on you. But unlike when you caught him at the crime scene, he won’t glance away this time.

“Dynamight, thank you so much for your work today.” You beam at him. “Without you, I—“

“Told’j’ya before, princess, it’s Katsuki.” He scoffs. “F’r fuck’s sake, talk t’ me like a normal person.”

You feel the heat spread across your cheeks. You’re praying he doesn’t notice your change in expression, but who are you kidding? Although the man acts like he’s emotionally unavailable, he picks up on more than you think. You flounder with your response.

“It’s just, we don’t really know each other like that, so I didn’t want to—“

“‘Course we do.” He lifts a critical brow. “You’re comin’ t’ dinner with me now that this shit’s over with, right?”

Mentally, your jaw is unscrewed and on the floor. Is this reality? The Dynamight — the rudest, most impressive motherfucker you’ve ever had the pleasure of working with — is asking you on a date. All this time, you thought his flirting was a game, while deeply regretting that you hadn’t made a move before your time with him was up. Discovering that your crush is mutual reinvigorates you. Before you fuck this up, you muster a reply.

“Uh… yes!” You giggle. “Of course I will!”

You don’t know how you manage to keep a steady tone. The only thing you can’t control is your face. Fortunately, he thinks it’s hella cute. Without considering who might be watching, he strokes your cheek with his thumb to coax back your attention. He nearly melts when you shyly meet his gaze, such a small, innocent smile gracing your lips. He knows it’s too soon to kiss you. He wishes it wasn’t. Instead, he offers you his arm. Your hand feels warm against his bare bicep.

He grabs your knapsack from you — a gentleman’s gesture that’s a little rough around the edges. Thankfully, the execution doesn’t bother you; it’s the thought that counts. Katsuki thinks that might be what attracted him to you. The way you conceptualize him is different. Last week, a woman scolded him for his use of language, even though he saved her purse from being stolen. Shouldn’t it be his actions that matter? Some days, he feels like he’s back in his teenage years, dealing with Best Jeanist’s strict teachings again. People need to learn not to judge a book by its cover.

He guides you out of your office with his hand secured to your lower back. You don’t miss the stares and whispers of your colleagues. You’ll have a lot to explain tomorrow morning.

“You like Indian food?” He inquires lowly, warm breath ghosting over your face.

“Sure.”

If you make it in.

[eldritch-spouse]

Was reading through the Berle tag, and was hit with this random brain worm-

Imagine you're visiting the Glutton ring of hell -either as a tourist or simply visiting some friends who live within that circle- and, as a treat, you drop into Berle's ice cream parlor. A nice sweet and cooling slice of heaven to be found amongst the smoldering heat of hell. Of course you've heard of the place before. With it being so famous, a damn-near requirement to stop by whenever you're in Glutton. You've heard of the complex and wide range of flavors that are served there. Some flavors you wouldn't even have come close to considering possible ice cream flavors. Some of them honestly sound downright repulsive, but you have learned not to judge. Let others live their happiness, and focus on living your own.

Okay, so maybe you had alternative motives when you made a detour on your way to whatever place you're staying at, to step into Berle's highly air-conditioned shop. You were on a mission. A rather childish and, to others, pointless one. But to you, it was of high importance, you just had to know! Did they sell your favorite ice cream flavor. It wasn't like you had odd tastes, you weren't searching for a thanksgiving dinner flavored scoop of creamy goodness, but for whatever reason, you just could never seem to find a place that sold your favored flavor. Anytime you'd go to a grocery store, or any other ice cream shop, it'd be the first thing you'd search out. Always feeling disappointed and a bit let down when your hopeful searches turned up empty. At this point, you'd marry someone in order to satiate your cravings. And you say so, more so to yourself than anyone else, as you looked over the offered flavors for that day.

You don't think anyone had heard you, and even if they did, you didn't think much of it. Didn't think anyone would care. How wrong you were. How unaware and cutely ignorant you were of the future you had unknowingly spoken into existence. Even if you didn't truly mean it. You were just making a joke about how much you wanted to indulge in your sought after treat again. The demon behind the counter, who had found his eyes stuck to you since you had entered his shop, and was watching you with sickly sweet hunger as you scanned over his products, had heard you loud and clear.

If he doesn't have what you're looking for, if you just give him a bit he promises you he can cook it up for you! While he's doing that, you can pick out your guys rings. You can propose to him once you get back.

((Also, I don't know if you do anons, but if you do can I either be Isopod anon or 🧠 anon?)

[I don't really tag anons, but we have a few yes, I'll remember you.]

There's been a number of asks regarding Berle that sort of sound like "I'd only humor him if he had [X] flavor", which is selling yourself short, because if there's one location in the world where you're likely to find the most niche flavors of ice cream, it would be Gluttony, especially Berle's Sorbet place.

You're even more cooked in this scenario because, the way you worded it almost makes it sound like a deal proposition, and the prince is going to swoop in immediately. He accepts your deal, formalizes it in a manner much too quick for you to realize, and by fulfilling the request you set forth, he in turn expects you to remain true to your end of the deal.

This is something he'll continue to hold over your head. You made a deal, you made an open deal, and he fulfilled it. Don't be silly, there are consequences for your actions!

So anyway, time to cook in advance for the ceremony, would you like to help Berle? He's going to make a wedding themed slime cream for the occasion and he'd like his bride's input.

[aroseformyself]

yandere twst au !¡

heartslabyul | savanaclaw | octavinelle | scarabia | pomfiore | ignihyde | diasomnia | genshin version

⚠️tw: bullying, violence, nsfw, blackmail, yandere, noncon/dubcon, mc is depicted to be small and fragile (im not even like that but it fits with the theme), reader is gn for half then afab for nsfw

. K A L I M A L - A S I M !¡

. the oblivious stalker

. stats

easily angered: 1/10 physical capability: 4/10 gullibility: 8/10 sexual sadism: 1/10

kalim is not used to being told no, so when mc tells him no to hanging out AND leaves him alone after you reject his request, mc can only imagine how confused he is. kalim is one of the most delusional yanderes which can be very dangerous given his position with being rich and all. but lucky for kalim, you can’t avoid him (not that he knew you were avoiding him) when he and jamil go to the library for a tutor session. jamil leaves for a second and comes back after a while, which obviously sparks curiosity in kalim. when he asks however, he doesn’t get a good answer, “nothing important, get back to reading.” kalim doesn’t like not getting his way, so he decides to check it out later, pretending to have to go to the bathroom. this better work because he used all his brainpower on this idea. when he finds mc in the rows of books he smiles and greets mc as if they hadn’t met before. but they walk away again, annoyed.

kalim doesn’t understand what being ignored is because of everyone always giving him attention. so he continues to pursue mc in the halls even though you try to avoid him. until one day he overhears jamil talking to himself about meeting with mc, and he feels anger? he does not like how you talk to jamil and not him, what does jamil have that he doesn’t? kalim suddenly starts trying to watch over how jamil does everything, attempting to mimic his actions when he gets to see mc. like cooking, kalim tries cooking mc a cake of peace to make you like him. but ends up in a disaster because the kitchen would have burned down if not for jamil jumping in and saving him. kalim asks jamil to help him cook something for mc.

when mc comes to scarabia because jamil invited them, kalim is ecstatic. he isn’t happier when he finally gets to hug mc, and talk to them. even if he keeps spacing out. fastforward, jamil overblotted, and kalim felt horrible he couldn’t be there to protect mc. even when he did get back, mc had been violated by jamil. mc now gets overflowing gifts from kalim as payment, jewelry, clothes, help with re-building ramshackle. anything they want they just have to ask. but when mc denies this, saying they can’t do that, it’d be unfair, kalim AND jamil are shocked. kalim now admires mc even more now because of their selflessness. but still, he insists saying there must be one thing they desperately want or need.

mc finally gives in and says re-building ramshackle would be nice. and immediately kalim gets to work calling people who can help mc out with theur problem. and the next week is followed by ramshackle getting remodled into a better and non-creaky house. (much to someone elses dismay). mc continually thanks kalim for helping them out, and kalim tries to tell them it’s fine. mc tries to repay him and kalim chooses to make mc his friend, meaning they won’t run away from him.

. J A M I L V I P E Я !¡

. the believes hes doing it for a good cause

. stats

easily angered: 3/10 physical capability: 6/10 gullibility: 1/10 sexual sadism: 6/10

jamil met mc in the library, he often comes here with kalim to study. or at least try to help kalim study. he noted your presence when mc, embarrassingly, tripped and knocked over some books off a shelf, jamil, who had been on the other side of the shelf searching for a new book. was forced into helping mc put them back. even though he tried his best to walk away quickly. he ended up helping them up, scolding mc on being careful afterwards then retreating back to kalim and letting out a long sigh. he honestly didn’t like mc, they were just as oblivious as kalim was, yet mcs face is always stoic… he found it odd, and decided to keep tabs on mc for kalims sake.

mc and jamil both always happen to run into each other at the library, and sit at the same table. not next to each other or anything, he’s over thinking about you wanting to get close to kalim, while poor mc is just trying to find a lead on their homeland. insert montage of multipule days going by and jamil and mc slowly inching towards each other. until one day, they sit mext to each other, no words exchanged, just listening contently to the instrumental music playing in the background. mc and jamil both glance st each other from time to time. neither ever making eye contact but content with the silence, and eventually jamil has to speak up because mc feels way to vulnerable in fromt of him. jamil asks if they cam taste test this new recipe for him, during winter break and possibly stay at scarabia since ramshackle is very old. mc agrees, jamil would dare care them naive for taking such an offer with someone they barely know. so easy to trap…

mc notifies grim about scarabia and they say their byes to everyone. as they finish they head to the kitchen because of grims starving stomach. and help the scarabia students cook. jamil continues to control kalim because he believes that he’s doing this for his sake, mc could still very much want to kill him. althought he has no proof… jamil sends the residents of scarabia to lock mc in the guest room. mc now fully doubts kalim and jamil since they can’t leave scarabia. they have a weird dream of jamil caressing their hair and whispering to them which freaks them out. the walks tire out mc more than the other students and kalim stops “spacing out” for one second, just enough for him to allow mc to climb onto the elephant with him. mc is scared of kalim because of all the yelling he’s already done, but they can’t refuse. jamil silently smirks to himself.

when the octotrio come into play and save mc (albeit they scared), jamil overblots. sending the others to the edge of scarabia, keeping mc and grim, grim was tied up and sitting in a small cage and mc was wearing a deep red, silky, pants and crop top. mc was uncomfy but acted along for the sake of not getting hypnotized. mc was forced to feed jamil grapes and sit on his lap, while the resident took orders from jamil. soon power gets way into jamils head and he asks mc to give him compliments. mc, seeing their “friends” back, plays along and ends up kissing him when kalim accidentally knocks over grims cage. a successful distraction and jamil gets knocked out by floyd who swung a platter way to hard. when jamil wakes up he can only apologize for his actions and repay mc…

(slight nsfw!¡)

you look out into the desert, your friends getting sent so far back they are out of sight. you force yourself not to sink onto your knees and stand up, facing jamil yourself. jamil smirks, waving his hand in grims direction and bringing him into the air, “hey! hey!” grim shouts, flailing around.

”wait! don’t hurt him!” you put your hands up in front of you, waving them back and forth to get the point across. jamil stops smirking, and glances st grim, “and what will you do to repay me for it?”

off the top of your head you can’t think of anything, so you went with, “anything—anything you want…” the last part is a mere whisper. jamil takes it though, locking grim up in a cage and putting a tie around him. you sigh, relieved for a second, until jamil wraps a hand around you and brings you closer. you feel the clothes around you slowly change into silk, a deep red, “i always knew red fit you better.” jamil stated, referring to when kalim gave you a blue outfit.

jamil slowly pulls you into his lap, and you followed thinking it was better to go along then be controlled. jamil buried his face in the crook of your neck, and softly cupped your heat, making a little gasp come out of you. you reflexively gripped his arm and attenpted to pull it away. jamil started rubbing his finger against you through the silk. you glance at grim to see him still struggling with his eyes closed, you really don’t want him to see you like this. “j-jamil…!” you cried, trying to stop him.

jamil didn’t stop, “can i rub one out of you? are you truly that sensitive?” he asked condescendingly, and he could, within seconds you were coming around nothing. your face heated up, and jamil cooed at you, “aw, don’t feel bad, i find it extremely cute.” as if it were making you feel better.

jamil turns you around, holding your heat against him, “jamil…” you choke back a sob, you glance over at grim and see him faced the other way, staring at your friends! they came back! …you can only hope they didn’t witness that mess…

kalim swiftly grabs grims cage but drops it to the floor with a loud bang, jamil is about to turn around when you kiss him. floyd comes from behind, knocking him out.

after jamil apologizes and explains his sad backstory, the octotrio decide to take you and grim back to ramshackle. azul holds grim while the furball sleeps, walking beside you while the tweels follow close behind. however, you realize you never should have trusted them,

when floyd slides a hand down your pants and presses his fingers against you, “poor shrimpys got their boxers/panties fuullllll of cum~”…