#it also has carys. who is a badass

[lactosefreevanillayoghurt]

hello should i read radio silence

YES ‼️

[therainscene]

[Mentions of ST5 leaks below.]

I've been thinking about Linda Hamilton's mysterious role in S5. Leaks tend to agree that she plays a military character of some sort, but I dunno how difficult a guess that is to make given how much of a gun-toting badass her Terminator character is.

Most of ST's guest stars tend to be cast in roles that reflect the classic 80s movies they were in -- Paul Reiser plays a representative of an exploitative institution like in Aliens; Sean Astin solves a puzzle map that leads to underground tunnels like in The Goonies; Robert Englund plays (the father of) a heavily-scarred, mind-walking child murderer like in A Nightmare on Elm Street, etc -- but is that true for all of them?

What does Larry Kline (the slimy Mayor who screws over small businesses to protect the interests of a large corporation) have in common with Cary Elwes's most famous role (the dashing, swashbuckling farmhand-turned-pirate from Princess Bride)? The similarities may not be immediately obvious, but I think they're clearer when you remember that Elwes also played Robin Hood -- Larry Kline is an ironic reversal of the working-class hero Elwes is known for.

What if Linda Hamilton has been cast as an ironic reversal of Sarah Connor?

Sarah Connor is the mother of humanity's future savior, and by Terminator 2, the burden of ensuring that he survives being the target of a genocidal time-travelling AI has turned her into a hardened solider plagued by nightmares of children dying in an apocalypse she's helpless to prevent.

You can hardly blame her for feeling helpless. Even without the time-travelling robots, she's just one woman trying to make a stand against powerful institutions: the military-funded lab that's ignorantly creating the AI her son is destined to oppose; the asylum doctors who think she's a raving lunatic unfit to raise a child.

It's very reflective of 80s anxieties -- not just the Cold War threat of nuclear annihilation, but the conservative threat of social annihilation in the name of silencing misunderstood minorities.

A reversal of Sarah Connor would, therefore, be someone who is still obsessed with protecting children from a rogue (time-travelling? 🤞) hivemind -- but from the conservative, institutionalized power side of things.

In other words: exactly the sort of antagonistic force that was foreshadowed in the S4 epilogue.

(Should the leaks be true, then this would be the real reason for casting Hamilton in a military role.)

Following this train of thought: if we're getting a villain who's focused on "protecting" children, then what does that suggest about the fact that Holly Wheeler -- 7 year-old sister of a gay Hellfire member and frequent innocent witness to The Horrors that surround him -- is shaping up to be one of Henry's targets in S5?

Let's talk about Ted and Karen.

I feel like these two tend to be misunderstood by the fandom. Either they're frothing bigots who would kick Mike out of the house the instant they found out he was queer, or they're chill allies who have been assuming that Mike was dating Will this whole time.

But that's what Will's parents are like. As a visible gay kid who's playing the stereotypical Sad Gay Boy archetype, it makes sense for Will to have parents that represent the obvious extremes of queer acceptance: Lonnie is never going to be convinced that it's anything other than shameful for his son to be queer, and Joyce is never going to be convinced that there's anything wrong with the way her son loves.

But Mike is the invisible, ambiguously straight-passing kid deep in the throes of comphet -- his role is to surprise the audience by subverting their expectations. And so it's important, I think, that his parents represent the subtler attitude that best reflects his story: the ignorant conformists.

They're the sort of people who get offended when they're accused of bigotry -- they're not hateful, heaven forbid! -- but who still passively support bigoted systems because they refuse to stand up like Sarah Connor or Joyce Byers and challenge the status quo.

While I do believe that "our son with a girl?" is a queer-coded line, I don't think the point was necessarily to suggest that Ted knows about Mike's queerness.

Consider the full context of that scene: Brenner was pressuring the Wheelers to rat Mike out so that this weird kid he was hiding (literally in his closet at one point!) could be apprehended, and he easily won them over with a little "protect the children" fearmongering:

The Wheelers want to support Mike -- but they can only understand his behaviour within the heteronormative white suburban context they're used to, and they'll readily trust authorities they absolutely should not be trusting to explain what help he needs.

Unlike Lonnie, though, the Wheelers have the capacity to change in this regard. They immediately clocked the ridiculousness of the town's Satanic Panic in S4, and the last time we saw them, they demonstrated a promising willingness to question authority and roll their eyes at conservative fearmongering.

But they haven't completed their redemption arc just yet. Holly's disappearance will be an important test of their commitment to this change in attitude.

Picture a redux of that S1 scene, with Hamilton's character in Brenner's role: "I understand your skepticism. It seems ridiculous that there are people in our town who are so committed to hurting children. But cultists are a different breed. Do you remember what happened to Will Byers four years ago? You don't really believe that he randomly got lost in the woods for a week, do you? The same week another child was found dead in the quarry? We can help your daughter, but only if you act now. Tell us where your misguided son and that deeply unwell boy he's a little too close to have gone."

Do they give in to the fearmongering and throw Mike under the bus for Holly's sake?

Or do they clock this bullshit for what it is and decide to peek behind the curtain -- and finally become the sort of parents Mike needs them to be?

[hotvintagepoll]

Propaganda

Katharine Hepburn (Bringing Up Baby, The Philadelphia Story, The African Queen)—This woman. I have been obsessed with her for years. I know the urban legend is a popular one at this point of her walking around set in her underwear when her pants were stolen and she was left with only a skirt, but the pants thing is honestly enough for her to be the hottest in the room in my book. She refused to wear anything else at a time when the public in general and especially the studios did not like that. She was independent, stubborn, and so so very capable. Competency kink anyone? Also, if you want one final way that Katharine's entire life was saying "fuck you" to the establishment, it started young! Her mother took her to suffrage events, and she never got rid of that attitude of justice. I feel like I have barely scratched the surface of all the ways she was such a badass that I'm turning into a rambling mess instead.

Gene Tierney (Laura, The Ghost and Mrs Muir, Leave Her to Heaven)— The class, the elegance. The way she walks into frame and immediately all focus is on her. She had a pretty lengthy struggle with mental health that she describes in her book, which I think made her all the more sensitive in portraying characters like in leave her to heaven. Also she dumped JFK so

This is round 4 of the tournament. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage woman.

[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]

Katharine Hepburn propaganda:

I'm sure one million people will submit her as an iconic Hollywood star but that iconicness might lead people to forget just how insanely hot she was like she had it ALL she was skilled she was funny she was smart she was beautiful AND she was likely bisexual

The single word I would use to explain Katherine Hepburn's appeal is *range*. In her acting career, that meant covering all the ground between lush period dramas and the comedies she did with Carey Grant and Spencer Tracey. In terms of hotness, it meant an uncanny ability to bring anything from a Dietrich-esque androgyny to some of the best Classic Hollywood Glamour you will ever see.

Katharine hep was so cool. The VIBES, the INDEPENDENCE,,, living life on her own terms.

she just had this.... bearing to her, this power. she could be funny, even silly (like in bringing up baby) but also so regal and elegant. she was nobody's fool and dear GOD that's so hot

Fancam link

She’s not only stunningly gorgeous (those eyes that pierce your soul! a jawline you could cut glass with!) but her delivery and physical presence in roles gives off confidence and authority in such a sexy way (truly the biggest dick energy of Old Hollywood). Her fiery energy in The Philadelphia Story? Unmatched.

God she's. She's so hot y'all. She has the range!!!!! Funny and dramatic and lovely

She IS the transatlantic accent. Classically gorgeous and such a strong personality.

She's literally one of the funniest women to ever live! She goes shot for shot with Cary Grant in Philadelphia Story and we damn well love her for it! She's the most annoying creature to ever live in Bringing Up Baby but she's so insane and funny that we simply cannot help but fall in love with her (and root for her to give Grant an aneurysm!)

i know she's accounted for but i really want to be sure someone has submitted the scene in bringing up baby where she's pretending to be a gangster

She simply stuns onscreen; you cannot do anything but be captivated by her presence. Also a non-gender-conforming icon and mild tumblr celebrity by virtue of that one picture from The Warrior's Husband (stage play).

Katharine Hepburn was out here casually changing the lives of young butch lesbians with her gender swag! She wore pants even when people said she shouldn’t, she refused to marry or have kids, and she wore menswear in at LEAST one movie!

If I start thinking about her face for too long I will cry she is so so hot. Katherine is so charismatic and charming in everything she appears in - watch her adopt a leopard and fall in love with her. Also she has the biggest dick energy ever (she and her pal Lauren Bacall share that accolade). Also had an incredibly long and varied career from screw ball comedies to serious dramas - she’s a queen of the screen and I adore her.

Someone's got to mention it, but she's won the most Oscars out of any performer and is largely considered one of the greatest actresses ever. She's got an incredible voice, an incredible presence, and she absolutely steals every scene she's in. She was private person and deemed standoffish and unapproachable, but she was also profoundly concerned for people's rights and was an outspoken supporter of abortion access. Finally, the Katharine Hepburn slacks look is just iconic. I mean look at her.

(I hope someone else submits real propaganda but just in case they don't:) Cries. Screams. Wails. The woman who singlehandedly made me realize I was bi. A real "do i want to look like her. be her. or be with her.' crisis, where the answer was all three. Holy shit please all three.

Gene Tierney:

The entire plot of Laura is that a guy has to become completely obsessed with a woman after just seeing her portrait. This only works because Gene was cast in the role. I 10000% believe anyone could fall in love after seeing her face.

Those eyes! Just look at those eyes! She’s at her hottest in Leave Her To Heaven— I literally want her to ruin my life.

Absolute grade-A babe, she is the perfection incarnate.

Gene Tierney was beautiful, poised, intense. I associate her with roles where she was murderous or an intelligent woman being patronized to - like a woman on the edge! As far as I am concerned, she deserved to do whatever she wanted.

She had a slight overbite which was amazingly sexy, and a throaty voice that was very memorable as well. She’s terrific in Laura, which reminds me I should watch it again.

EYES!! Her diabolical acting in Leave Her to Heaven is just perfect, Rosamund Pike definitely took notes for her Gone Girl from her.

Oscar-nominated and simply one of the most beautiful women to ever walk this Earth.

Absolutely stunning. In Leave Her to Heaven, she reaches Rosamund-Pike-in-Gone-Girl levels of “holy fucking shit?!?!?!” She had a fling with JFK in the ‘40s and also dated the exes of Rita Hayworth and Hedy Lamarr (Prince Aly Khan and W. Howard Lee, respectively). Sadly, her daughter was born with a disability (during a time in which there were few good mainstream options for disabled children and their parents), likely because of a fan who was sick with measles and went out of her way to meet Tierney (who was pregnant) anyway. Topical! Sure would be good if people stayed home when they were sick! Anyway, she was also a Republican, which sucks. Laura and Leave Her to Heaven are great viewing though.

[mrstsung]

Shang tsung's and why i love them:

1995 shang tsung: Cary Hiroyuki Mofo Tagawa. Nuff said! That movie is a Klassic and you can't hold a candle to it. Cary still got it after many years in my opinion. And still can do shang's voice or even old man shang now that he's now a fine older gentleman. Either way. I love classic 95 shang.

Mk: shaolin monks: my childhood,ok look he's special to me. Mk2 shang is still badass,and difficult af to fight but also fun to fight as. Still love him. Bearded shang ftw.

Mk:legends: look old man shang tsung can get it any day but i love the legends animated movies. He has just enough swag,charm,and charisma like always but subtle. Unfortunately,it's so fast paced and i wish he had more fight scenes and was written with a little more grace.

Mk:11: oh boy tagawa ages like a fine wine. But his voice got better. More intimidating. More charm. Unf. Good shit right there. Besides,tagawa IS shang tsung,you can't top that. But mk11 wasn't bad,not the best. But not bad. Tagawa saved it imho.

Mk12/mk1: now i don't like everything. And despite my gripes with the poor execution of the story and pacing and all the unnecessary changes and crap. I can't lie. Shang tsung there is sexy af. But i just wish people weren't so weird about him. And i wish they'd stop comparing him to other characters that honestly,have nothing in common with him other than magic and cunning. When no offense,shang runs circles around them. Plus he's his own character and should be treated with respect. I'm sick of him being treated like someones designer dog instead of an interesting,and important character. Like damn. But anyways. Mk12/mk1 shang, alan Lee's shang tsung suffers the same problem that art butler's shang tsung did. Poor writing,fast paced,sloppy script,and little to no payoff. Nothing of significance changed. Shang's still treated like shit and if not worse. An accessory to buy instead of an integral part of lore like he's supposed to be. (Im sorry shang you gotta be treated like this) so god damn much potential.

Honorable mentions Mk9 and mk:conquest: ok still got me after many years. I'd be a piss liar if i didn't say i miss this shang tsung. I do miss sleazy,cheesy,and bearded shang tsung. However i still say he needs more grace,respect,and love just as much. And i don't mind the more cartoony aspects. Hell anyone whos been around long enough with mk knows that's where it started. But yeah. I miss him dearly. I mean that's what i grew up on.

So yeah shang is shang to me. But not all shang's are equal. Some i love more than others.

[moonrise-rebel]

I rewatched Quest for Camelot, an absolute fave from my childhood, and even though I knew some actors, I didn't know exactly how star-studded the film was. It is wild! Gary Oldman, Jane Seymour (and Celine Dion as her singing voice), Pierce Brosnan, Jessalyn Gilsig, Cary Elwes... also Al Roker doing some random background voice? Like. What?!

Also, so many good things - a badass disabled hero who is not cured or "fixed" at the end (not even momentarily during the magic pulse), heroine learning to be badass, knighting happy ending (vs wedding), Devon and Cornwall not splitting up, an incredible soundtrack (including, as my friend pointed out, the Superman theme?! 🤣), Silverwing, the griffin's "precisely" that has lived in my head rent free for years now, Gary Oldman having the time of his fucking life...

Also also also the fact that this movie is what The Prayer is from?!?! Like it's sung so seriously and beautifully by Andrea Bocelli, Josh Groban, Celine Dion... and it comes from this. What a goddamn delight.

I don't think I saw a single person of colour, though 🙃 C'mon, people, give me diverse Camelot!

Still, I really enjoyed myself. (And I'm glad that this particular fave hasn't been ruined by time and... increased awareness like a lot of others.)

[popculturebuffet]

Next up for Cartoon Network era of shows, who is your favorite character from each of the early 2010s Check It renaissance era shows you've seen like: Regular Show, Sym Bionic Titan, Robotomy, The Problem Solverz, The Amazing World of Gumball, Secret Mountain Fort Awesome, Ben 10 Omniverse, Uncle Grandpa, Steven Universe, and Clarence?

Regular Show: CJ... besides being cute she's a fun character and was a good match for Mordecai.. then he fucking blew it in an incident i've never quite gotten over and will cover at some point if anyone's intrested, though till I do Sarcastic Chorus has covered mordecai fumbling the ball well. Overall the show itself is great, aside from season 6. The Romance Stuff can be drawn out when your not talking about Rigleen, but it's got great comedy, good batshit insanity and ends on a high note. It's an all time classic and like adventure time left a mark on animation. It's succesor close enough was even better and go seek it out since it's hard to find offically because warner bros fucking blows.

Sym Bionic Titan: Octus, brian poshen's best role and one of the best designs i've seen. The show itself was treated oh so shittily and i'ts nice Gennendy now has more of a blank check over at cartoon network (Still need to watch more of Unicorn: Warriors Eternal) as they owe him after canceling this. Still a good show and I hope he can continue it someday.

The Problem Solverz: no faviorites, didn't like this one. Almost forgot to include it. Next.

Robotmy: Don't really have a faviorite character but I did last this one. Like Titan deserved better and that's a bit of a theme at times during this era: some shows got the runs they deserved, others died fast

Gumball; Penny. I liked her first design and her unshelled one was a nice twist. She also serves as a nice contrast to her boyfriends nonsense and i'm glad they pulled the trigger on that fast. Carie is a close second. As for this show I honestly need to see more as I simply lost touch when I stopped having cable and didn't catch up on streaming. But it's an excellent show. While I hated it's sticking to the status quo, in hindsight it dosen't: both the boys get girlfriends in stand out episodes, their grandma gets married, richard's dad comes back, change does happen it's just more on the simpsons scale of "it's gradual". I"m happy it's coming back and to see a movie eventually.

Secret Mountain Fort Awesome: I got nothing. I didn't really watch this one, wasn't intrested, what I saw wasn't good. Next.

Ben 10 Omniverse: Rook Mothefucking Blonko. For all the ups and down with the series, he was a worthy partner to ben, a fun character and a nice contrast being the more reserved by the book badass normal to Ben's empowered moron. One of the series best additions, bring him back whenever it returns. Have child him adventure with ben I don't care. As for the show as a whole.. it's a fucking mess. It has some really good stuff like the initial arc, Blox (My faviorite transformation of this era), and some good one off episodes... but also a lot of wacky nonsense. The show tried to restroe some of the og continuity the alien era ignored, which is good on paper but in practice left the franchise a spiraling mess, brought back some characters without properly reintroducing them (Though bringing lucy back was a good move and she was fantastic), and had a ton of ships for ben but settled on the worst option, making him a harem protaganist for no real reason. Some arcs were good, some eps were good, a lot of it is garbage, and the design work is excellent. It's not horrible but it is a hot mess of a show and a weird note to end the og continuity on.

Uncle Grandpa: Pizza Steve. This show was alright: Id idn't like it at first but it grew on me a little, though I just kinda drifted from it. As batshit insane as the idea was, I did like the steven universe crossover as it somehow worked and has some of the best pearl moments series wide. Otherwise the series is alright and probably worth another look.

Steven Universe: Garnet. The series has a LOT of great characters (Pearl and Greg are close seconds and thirds), but Garnet is a throughly intresting character, a kind leader and a good mom to steven with one of the most badass musical numbers in all of animation. Pearl again is a very close second being a nicely flawed character. The series as a whole.. is one of my faviorite cartoons of all time if not my faviorite. It's one I need to rewatch: beautifully animated, paced decently (Far from perfectly but looking at the bigger picture now it's over, not nearly as bad as it's rep was. It spaced out story moments with life just happening). The cast is memorable and charming as hell, the fight scenes some of the best in western animatoin and animation period, and the finale while rushed due to rebecca having to take a seasons worth of finale material and compress it into a few extra episodes she had to beg cartoon network for, is utterly satisfying. Steven Unvierse Future: While this one is a bit later might as well get it out of the way. I love this one. I get why some don't, it's divisive, to me it feels like a valid deconstruction of Steven's trauma, an epilogue that shows what having this savior complex thrust on him, this need to fix grown adults, would do to the poor boy and ends with him finding his own life. It's bleak as hell in places, but it ends on a note of hope and humanity that makes the jouney worht it.

Clarence: Sumo whose some classic tom kenny and usually pretty fun. A weird note to end on as while Steven Universe, like adventure time before, changed animation, where as CN kinda buried Clarence after it's creator's public breakdown and like Gumball I lost touch eventually. That being said.. Clarence is excellent. The crew rebounded well, the characters are charming and it's a nice slice of life show. I wish Jeff was less of a jerk, but otherwise it's a really fun show with a really kind protagonist.

[draganwhorror]

What has been the most disappointing celebrity encounter that you're comfortable sharing? For example, they were rude, pushy about sales, or their staff kept trying to rush people through the line? Also, your BEST and most delightful encounter!!

Honestly, I have never encountered a rude celebrity. None of them have been pushy either. I've had more issues with con staff/security being kind of abrasive than I did with a celebrity or their handler/agent.

I suppose a celebrity who was a little...disappointing, I guess, was Katey Sagal (Peg Bundy/Sons of Anarchy). She was very pleasant and nice, but she also came across as kind of... indifferent or like she wasn't super keen on meeting fans. It was nice meeting her, but the interaction wasn't anything to write home about.

As for my most delightful encounter... Well, I've had quite a few of those. The first time I met Billy Boyd (Pippin from LotR), he took my phone and went crazy with selfies. John DiMaggio (voice of Bender the robot and Jake the dog) did the same thing.

Uh... Michael Rosenbaum (Lex Luthor from Smallville) was kinda flirty and tried to get me to buy his CD (jokingly).

Mary Lynn Rajskub (24) was so excited about a photo I brought in to have signed that she took a video and put me on her Instagram story while at the con.

Robert Englund wrapped his arms around me and told me to get cheek to cheek with him.

Joey Fatone hugged me as soon as I walked up to his table.

Cary Elwes complimented my shoes when I met him.

Both Sam Raimi and Eli Roth gushed over my Intruder shirt when I met them.

Dermot Mulroney got super excited when I brought up a Hulu movie he did that no one ever talked to him about.

Jack Dylan Grazer told me my loser/lover tattoo was badass, then asked if he should get a tattoo.

And the first time I met Ted, he was very... excitable. I handed him a photo from The Midnight Meat Train to get signed, and he absolutely loved it. He gushed over it, then told me a story about Bradley Cooper.

So, yeah, I've had quite a few delightful experiences with celebs 😂

[arttrampbelle]

Cw:vent

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Could i plz have some shang tsung kontent that doesn't involve him shipped with random characters (i mean really random. 99.99% of the roster genuinely hates him so him fucking them makes no sense. They would kill him in a heartbeat and would rather die. So wtaf). Because y'all so deprived in life?

(Also nobody in mortal kombats lore likes shang tsung. He is the biggest bastard. As we love him for it. So no. Him being with any canon characters makes no fucking sense at all. Period)

Could i have some x readers that doesn't involve other characters in how you meet? Like it feels like an oc at that point. The only characters that could introduce you. Would be if they are working for shang tsung. And no its not the storm bros. No its not any of the "good" guys. It would be a shadow priest,a shokan,a black dragon merc,shit like that.

(If you are doing an oc. Plz tag and label that properly. I dont mind shang if he's with an oc. Or hell id rather take a non mk character. Weird. But ok. But anyone and everyone in the mk roster hates him so no)

Could i have some actually decent fucking kontent?

Other characters get more respect and decent kontent.

Why do you do that to shang tsung if you guys "supposedly" like him? Or like mortal kombat.

Do y'all play the games? Do y'all care about the lore?

Or are you casual? Its fine if you are. Just state so. I dont wanna assume you are a huge fan and then go off. And then you say you dont know something. Then it feels embarrassing that i just info dumped on you and i feel like a weirdo.

Like i dont wanna waste my time with people that dont genuinely wanna get into something that i love. And i wanna actually engage with people without having to jump around hoops. And jump thru hurdles trying to explain shit.

And waste my time with people who don't respect him. And mr. Cary hiroyuki tagawa as well. (Because i swear you guys really don't.)

But also respect shangs character as a whole,outside of mr tagawas performances over the years. Because he exists outside of him. Tho he is most known and all fans agree HE IS SHANG TSUNG. But still other actors and interpretations exist. Like his character is grossly misinterpreted.

Like he's either too soft when he doesn't need to be. Too rough where it shouldn't be.

No balance.

Like imho the yandere fic writers know how to write him.

The villain/antagonist fuckers know how to write him.

Hell some monster fuckers know how to write him.

If the roster didn't hate this sneky mofo so much sure. I wouldn't be mad at the dumb shipping. Because its just that.

But its the fact they do. And that it makes no sense. Even in best case scenarios.

Shang hates them,they hate shang. It wouldn't work. Like people don't get it thru their skulls. That SHANG TSUNG IS A BASTARD VILLAIN THAT IS ONE BADASS DANGEROUS MOFO! (Again we love him for his atrocities. We dont demonize him,we even cheer when he gets karma. We also love him BECAUSE HE IS AN EVIL SORCERER BINCH) ok?! Like god damn.

You can make shang tsung sweet without uwufying him. You can make him an asshole without taking away his integrity.

This wont stop people unfortunately. And people think with their dicks,literal and metaphorical. And genuinely dont care about a character as long as they get their jimmys wet.

But whatever.

I guess im asking too much from people to give genuine respect to a character. Let alone a series that is happy part of my childhood and a series that i love deeply for 18 fucking yrs.

Sorry for this rant but im so sick of genuinely bastard villains in the hands of people who don't like them. Or genuinely understand them.

Im sick of people who say they love shang tsung as a character but only care if he's with their "safe" blorbo.

They wanna defang the fucking snake and it pisses me off.

Im done venting. You don't have to like me. But plz try to listen where im coming from as a fan. As someone who has seen the death and decay of fandoms in real time.

Try to listen to where im coming from plz. It sucks when you love a character and others dont really care about it like you do.

It sucks when you feel so damn alone when talking about problems with fans.

And it sucks loving a character and series that people genuinely don't really care about and is so superficial and surface level.

It bothers me. I know it shouldn't but it does.

[ultrahpfan5blog]

No Time To Die - A strong departure for a fantastic Bond

So there is no secret to the fact that Craig's Bond tenure has had a mixed critical response. Casino Royale and Skyfall are considered in the top 5 Bond films of all time by many. Given that there are now 25 Bond films, that is an impressive achievement for any single Bond actor. Unfortunately they are also offset by the fact that Quantum of Solace and Spectre are largely considered disappointments. I think this is partly because of the incredible reception of their respective predecessors. I don't dislike either of them and I enjoy them for the most part, while recognizing their flaws but they are noticeably inferior to Casino Royale and Skyfall. So No Time to Die comes with pressure of sending Craig's Bond, who has been brilliant through the his movies' highs and lows, off on a strong note. Having watched the movie, I will say that it is a significant improvement over Spectre and definitely a strong end to Craig's Bond era, even if it may not hit the heights of Casino Royale and Skyfall. I would say its a lot closer in quality to the CR and Skyfall than it is to Spectre and QoS.

I don't want to reveal any spoilers for the film but so can't say much about the plot, but given its the longest Bond film by almost 20 mins, it doesn't feel like it. Its actually a film where you get consistently invested in the plot and the characters. There are lots of returning characters and there are some good new characters who add a lot to the movie. The film pays tribute to Bond movies of the past, like films like OHMSS as well as previous Craig era Bond films.

The action in the film is excellent. I would say in terms of action, it is second maybe only to Casino Royale. There is a visceral nature to it. There is a sequence set in Cuba that is particularly brilliant. The pre-credits scenes are again fantastic. The film has an opening that is basically straight out of a horror movie and is really brilliant. That is followed by an exceptional sequence in Italy which has been foreshadowed in the trailers. There are strong action scenes littered throughout the film.

Lea Seydoux returns as Madeleine as the only Bond girl to every make a reappearance. I have to admit that I was a little worried because I wasn't completely sold on the chemistry between Craig and Seydoux in Spectre and that romance kind of came out of nowhere. However, I think they are much better together in this movie. I think their scenes together are much better written and the actors feel like they are more comfortable in their character's relationship with one another. Its still not as strong as the chemistry shared with Eva Green but I feel that was lightning in a bottle type stuff which is impossible to replicate. Admittedly, there is a marked reference to Vesper, which while poignant and meaningful, does remind you of that chemistry. There is that musical cue from CR that briefly reappears in a beautiful moment. Overall, Seydoux is really good in the movie. Lashanna Lynch appears as the new 007. I am sure there will be outrage over her taking Bond's moniker but she is excellent in the role and the dynamic between her and Bond is really funny and there is the slow build up of respect between the two that is really well done. Naomie Harris is back as Moneypenny and she's strong as she has always been, although the last two films haven't given her enough to do given how she was introduced in Skyfall. One of the big highlights of the film for me was Ana De Armas in a delightful cameo during the Cuba scene. She is adorable and badass and looks amazing in the gown. You immediately want to see much more of her. She and Craig manage to replicate their fun chemistry from Knives Out during that section. Her role is quite brief but she leaves a major impact. If Amazon is interested in doing spinoffs of Bond, I would suggest to start with her character.

All the other returning cast members are terrific as well. Fiennes has a substantial role in the movie as his actions are very directly linked to the plot of the movie. He's excellent as always. Ben Whishaw is also terrific again as Q. He's been one of the big highlights of the Craig era Bond films. Again, he gets a fairly sizable role with him playing a pretty active role in climax. Rory Kinnear continues to be a welcome presence as Tanner. I'm glad he hasn't been ignored as new cast members have come in. Jeffrey Wright reappears as Felix Leiter and his presence is another highlight of the movie. Despite him having been missing from the past two films, this movie does a great job re-establishing the brotherhood between Bond and Felix and there is some great fun and emotional scenes between them.

Christoph Waltz returns as Blofeld in a brief role and he is effectively used in a pretty intense scene that evokes Hannibal Lecter. Billy Magnussen appears as a side villain who Bond has a grudge against. There is a henchmen with a robotic eye who appears throughout the film. What unfortunately drags the film down below Casino Royale and Skyfall levels is Rami Malek's Safin. He is not a strong villain for such a big movie. He has a phenomenal entry scene, but he is only present in the last act. Apart from an obsession with Madeleine and a creepy look, there is nothing really that distinguishes him from a garden variety terrorist. We don't really get to know what his ideology is and why he specifically wants to do what he does. Even Greene in QoS had a clear motive for power and control. Malek also seems a bit miscast because the role seems to be for someone who is older than he is. I guess it doesn't help that Malek generally looks young for his age. Its unfortunate because a really good villain would have made this film brilliant, but because of a lack of proper motivation besides global terror, he doesn't really hold up despite Malek's best efforts.

Daniel Craig is the glue that holds the movie together. He is absolutely outstanding here. I think this is the most relaxed he has been in the role and also the most vulnerable. It might just be his best performance out of all five films. He wears his age comfortably, not unwilling to let Bond be vulnerable, both physically and emotionally, but continuing to be an absolute badass. He also just seems to be having a lot of fun in the role. There is plenty of humor in the film and he gets a good chunk of it. He's excellent in the emotional and dramatic scenes which give the movie so much more weight towards the end of the movie. He really is the beating heart of the film. I really think they should take a sizable break from Bond after this film because Craig's shadow will be long and very difficult for a new actor without some distance. He's definitely my favorite Bond, having seen all 25 films because he has given Bond nuances and vulnerability that previous version just haven't. Its a great goodbye to him because he is phenomenal here.

Cary Fukunaga does a real strong job directing this film. Like I mentioned before, the film is never boring despite its long running time. The writing for the villain is what lets the film down but technically and performance wise, this film is terrific. It may not be the perfect send off for Craig's Bond but its an absolutely worthy send off. I'm looking forward to seeing it again to see if my opinions change a bit. For now, this is like an 8-8.5/10

[grigori77]

2021 in Movies - My Top 30 Fave Movies (Part 3)

10. NO TIME TO DIE – another BIG movie that got knocked about A LOT looking for a release date due to COVID over the past two years was this long-awaited (SERIOUSLY) latest entry in the “reboot” universe James Bond, 007 spy film franchise, which got rescheduled so much we were beginning to fear we might NEVER get to see it. This was especially frustrating since it was intended to be Daniel Craig’s FINAL tour of duty as Bond, James Bond, the greatest spy to ever kiss-kiss-bang-bang, making it the biggest event in the franchise since it was first retconned for a new generation with the masterful Casino Royale. Since then the series has had highs and lows, but by and large it’s been REALLY STRONG, I’ll admit that, despite being a big fan of the old school Bonds I’ve really come to prefer this new version, and it is dominated by what many (myself included) consider to be the greatest Bond picture of all time, the incomparable Skyfall. So how does this one stack up? Well right away I must admit it DOESN’T reach the dizzying heights of awesomeness that Skyfall managed, but it’s very close to Casino Royale quality, and it’s definitely a strong improvement on the comparatively meh SPECTRE … most importantly, though, it certainly is a worthy and simply SPECTACULAR send-off for one of the best Bond actors of them all, to such an extent that it genuinely feels like the end of an era. It’s certainly as lush, lavish and well-appointed as we’ve come to expect from one of the most opulent big screen properties out there, and once again the Broccolis have drawn in all the best talent to execute it, particularly in the director’s chair, enlisting the heavyweight talent of True Detective, Sin Nombre and Beast of No Nation writer-director Cary Joji Fukunaga, who here also delivers a corker of a screenplay alongside franchise regulars Neil Purvis and Robert Wade, with extra spice added by Fleabag and Killing Eve creator Phoebe Waller Bridge, and the result is a globe-hopping, labyrinthine thrill-ride that’s every bit as exciting, intriguing, amusing and emotional as any of its predecessors. It’s also definitely the LONGEST, clocking in at an unprecedented (for the franchise) two-and-three-quarter hours, but then it’s got A LOT of story to cram into its running time, and the best part about this film is that everything’s done so well and is so thoroughly absorbing that you never feel it’s dragging its feet or that it’s too overlong. I won’t give away too much of the plot because it’s too much fun just letting the story unravel by itself, suffice to say that at the start there’s trouble in paradise after Bond drove off into the sunset with Madeleine (Lea Seydoux), as SPECTRE-based complications drive a wedge between them and forces Bond to go to ground, only for them to be reunited after five years when a new threat surfaces in the form of Safin (Mr Robot and Bohemian Rhapsody’s Rami Malek), a devious global terrorist from Madeleine’s past who’s gotten his hands on something capable of threatening the entire world. The problem is, now Bond’s on his own and MI6 have got a new 007, Nomi (Captain Marvel’s Lashana Lynch), who’s on the case herself and isn’t about to let an out-of-touch has-been get in her way. Craig’s magnificent as ever in what’s now officially become the greatest role he’s ever played, thoroughly badass but still maintaining that underlying element of vulnerability and self-deprecating humanity that’s always made this incarnation of Bond so effortlessly compelling, while Lynch shows a hell of a lot of promise for the future if the franchise does decided to go in the intriguing direction of following a new 007 in the future like the rumours say, investing Nomi with a cool confidence that hides hidden depths and complexities that I for one would very much look forward to exploring in the future; Seydoux, meanwhile, once again brings brittle beauty and grace to her role, but there’s steel beneath the surface, and it’s great fun seeing so many returning faces from the previous films, from Ralph Fiennes’ M, Naomie Harris’ Moneypenny and, of course, Ben Wishaw’s deserved fan-favourite Q to the welcome return of a far-too-long-absent Jeffrey Wright as Bond’s friend and CIA opposite-number Felix Leiter. Meanwhile there are two particularly notable turns from franchise newcomers, with Malek delivering one of the most intriguing, chilling and evocative villains the franchise has fielded in some time (even going so far as overshadowing Christoph Waltz’ returning mastermind Blofeld), while Blade Runner 2049’s Ana de Armas is clearly having a ball getting to kick arse and take names while reuniting with her Knives Outco-star as precocious rookie CIA field operative Paloma (another character I’d love to see again, especially if we could see her teaming up with Nomi). This is the Bond films doing what they do best, delivering maximum escapism while whipping several big budget, breakneck set-pieces past us with very little CGI in the mix at all (the unshakeable commitment to doing ALL the action physically has always been one of the things I most respect about these movies), but there’s a particularly strong emotional undertone this time round that makes it an especially powerful watch, which is perfectly suited to the gravity of this event picture, especially in the charged climax. Like it says in the song, “nobody does it better,” and when it comes to Bond that’s damned right.

9. GUNPOWDER MILKSHAKE – Netflix’ best offering of the summer was this surprise hit from Israeli writer-director Navot Papushado (Rabies, Big Bad Wolves), a heavily stylised black comedy action thriller that passes the Bechdel Test with FLYING COLOURS. Playing like a female-centric John Wick, it follows ice-cold, on-top-of-her-game assassin Sam (Karen Gillan) as her latest assignment has some unfortunate blowback, leading her to take on a reparation job retrieving missing cash for the local branch of the Irish Mob. The only catch is that a group of thugs have kidnapped the thief’s little girl, 12 year-old Emily (My Spy’s Chloe Coleman), and Sam, in an uncharacteristic moment of sympathy, decides to intervene, only for the money to be accidentally destroyed in the process. Now she’s got the Mob and her own employers coming after her, and she not only has to save her own skin but also Emily’s, leading her to seek help from the one person she thought she might never see again – her mother, Scarlet (Lena Headey), a master assassin in her own right who’s been hiding from the Mob herself for years. The plot may be simple but at times also a little over-the-top, but the film is never anything less than a pure, unadulterated pleasure, populated with fascinating, living and breathing characters of real complexity and nuance, while the script (co-written by relative newcomer Ehud Lavski) is tightly reined-in and bursting with zingers. Most importantly, though, Papushado really delivers on the action front – these are some of the best set-pieces I saw in 2021, Gillan, her co-stars and the various stunt-performers acquitting themselves admirably in a series of spectacular fights, gun battles and a particularly imaginative car chase that would be the envy of many larger, more expensive productions. Gillan and Coleman have a sweet, awkward chemistry, the MCU star particularly impressing in a subtly nuanced performance that also plays beautifully against Headey’s own tightly controlled turn, while there is awesome support from Angela Bassett, Michelle Yeoh and Carla Gugino as Sam’s adoptive aunts Anna May, Florence and Madeleine, a trio of “librarians” who run a fine side-line in illicit weaponry and are capable of unleashing some spectacular violence of their own; the film’s antagonists, on the other hand, are exclusively masculine – the mighty Ralph Inneson is quietly ruthless as Irish boss Jim McAlester, while The Terror’s Adam Nagaitis is considerably more mercurial as his mad dog nephew Virgil, and Paul Giamatti is the stately calm at the centre of the storm as Sam’s employer Nathan, the closest thing she has to a father. There’s so much to enjoy in this movie, not just the wonderful characters and amazing action but also the singularly engrossing and idiosyncratic style, deeply affecting themes of the bonds of family (both blood and found) and the healing power of forgiveness, and a rewarding through-line of strong women triumphing over the brutalities of toxic masculinity. I love this film, and I invite you to try it out, cuz I’m sure you will too.

8. JUDAS & THE BLACK MESSIAH – I’m a little fascinated by the Black Panther Party, I find them to be one of the most intriguing elements of Black History in America, but outside of documentaries I’ve never really seen a feature film that’s truly done the movement justice, at least until now. It became a major talking point of the Awards Season, and it’s easy to see why – director Shaka King is a protégé of Spike Lee, and together with up-and-coming co-screenwriter Wil Berson he’s captured the fire and fervour of the Party and their firebrand struggle for racial liberation through force of arms, as well as a compelling portrait of one of their most important figures, Fred Hampton, the Chairman of the Illinois Chapter of the BPP and a powerful political activist who could have become the next Martin Luther King or Malcolm X. Get Out’s Daniel Kaluuya is magnificent in the role, effortlessly holding your attention in every scene with his laconic ease and deceptively friendly manner, barely hinting at the zealous fire blazing beneath the surface, but the film’s true focus is the man who brought him down, William O’Neal, a fellow Panther and FBI informant placed in the Chapter to infiltrate the movement and find a way for the Federal Government to bring down what they believed to be one of the country’s greatest internal threats. Lakeith Stanfield (Sorry to Bother You, Knives Out) delivers a suitably complex performance as O’Neal, perfectly embodying a very clever but also very desperate man walking a constant tightrope to maintain his cover in some decidedly wary company, but there’s never any real sense that he’s playing the villain, largely garnering sympathy from the viewer as we’re shamelessly made to root for him, especially once he starts falling for the very ideals he’s trying to subvert – it’s a true star-making performance, and he even holds his own playing opposite Kaluuya himself. The rest of the cast are equally impressive, Dominique Fishback (Project Power, The Deuce) particularly holding our attention as Hampton’s fiancée and fellow Panther Akua Njeri, as does Jesse Plemmons as O’Neal’s idealistic but sympathetic FBI handler Roy Mitchell, while Martin Sheen is the film’s nominal villain in a chillingly potent turn as J. Edgar Hoover. This is an intense and thrilling film, powered by a tense atmosphere of pregnant urgency and righteous fury, but while there are a few grittily realistic set pieces, the majority of the fireworks on display are performance based, the cast giving their all and King crafting a potent and emotionally resonant, inescapably timely history lesson that informs without ever slipping into preachy exposition, leaving an unshakable impression long after the credits have rolled. This doesn’t just earn all the award-winning kudos it gained, it deserved A LOT MORE recognition that it got, and if this were a purely critical rundown list I’d have to put it in the top spot. As it is I’m monumentally enamoured of this film, and I can’t sing its praises enough …

7. RUN, HIDE, FIGHT – the biggest surprise hit for me this year was this wicked little indie suspense thriller from writer-director Kyle Rankin (Night of the Living Deb), which snuck in under the radar but has nonetheless garnered an impressive reputation fit for future cult success. Critics have been less kind, but the subject matter IS a pretty thorny issue, and handled the wrong way it could have been in very poor taste indeed. Thankfully Rankin has crafted a corker here, initially taking time to set the scene and welcome the players before throwing us headfirst into an unbelievably tense but also unsettlingly believable situation – a small town American high school becomes the setting for a fraught siege when a quartet of disturbed students take several of their classmates hostage at gunpoint, creating a social media storm in the process as they encourage the capture of the crisis on phone cameras. While the local police gather outside, the shooters discover another threat from within the school throwing spanners in the works – Zoe Hull (Alexa & Katie’s Isabel May), a seemingly nondescript girl who happens to be the daughter of former marine scout sniper Todd (Thomas Jane). She’s wound pretty tight after the harrowing death of her mother to cancer, fuelled by grief and conditioned by her father’s training, so she’s determined to get her friends and classmates out of this nightmare, no matter what. Okay, so the premise reads like Die Hardin a school, but this is a very different beast, played for gritty realism and shot with unshowy cinema-verité simplicity, Rankin cranking up the tension beautifully but refusing to play to his audience any more than strictly necessary, drip-feeding the thrills to maximum effect but delivering some harrowing action nonetheless. The cast are top-notch too, Jane delivering a typically subtle, nuanced turn while Treat Williams is likeably stoic as world-weary but dependable local Sherriff Tarsey, Rhada Mitchell intrigues as the matter-of-fact phantom of Zoe’s mum, Jennifer, concocted to help her through her mourning, Olly Sholotan is sweet and geeky as her best friend Lewis, and Eli Brown raises genuine goosebumps as an all-too-real teen psychopath in the role of terrorist ringleader Tristan Voy. The real beating heart and driving force of the film, though, is May, intense, barely restrained and all but vibrating with wounded fury, perfectly believable as the diminutive high school John McClane who defies expectations to become a genuine force to be reckoned with. Altogether this is a cracking little thriller, a precision-crafted little action gem that nonetheless raises some troubling questions and treats its subject matter with utmost care and respect, a film that’s destined for major cult classic status, and I can’t recommend it enough.

6. COPSHOP – thanks to COVID (wow, that really has become something of a mantra here this time, hasn’t it?), writer-director Joe Carnahan (Narc, Smokin’ Aces, The A-Team, The Grey, Stretch) delivered a double-threat in 2021 – first up was the under-the-radar, long-delayed release of his delirious time-loop sci-fi action comedy Boss Level¸ which JUST missed out on making my lists for the year but I would happily recommend it all the same. Thankfully when it came time for what is, if I’m entirely honest, probably THE BEST FILM HE’S EVER MADE (seriously, I don’t think he’s EVER done anything better than this, and you’re talking to someone who ADORES Smokin’ Acesand The Grey), the cinemas were finally open again and the studios were willing to take a chance again, so we got to see this how it was MEANT to be seen. I’m so glad, because this movie was QUITE the experience, and one I thoroughly appreciated getting to enjoy amongst a proper audience – from its intriguing slowburn start to its deliriously over-the-top bonkers ending, this is an absolute GEM of a thriller, but also, as befits your typical Carnahan film, one with a strong and very, VERY dark sense of humour shot right through it. It starts simply enough, with wounded conman Teddy Murretto (Carnahan regular Frank Grillo) punching out small-town Nevada rookie cop Valerie Young (Watchmen and The Good Lord Bird’s Alexis Louder) in order to get himself arrested and gain a little temporary shelter from the various killers who are tailing him, only for one of them to track him down and pull the same trick to get himself into one of the neighbouring holding cells, deservedly notorious professional hitman Bob Viddick (Gerard Butler). Things get more complicated when the precinct house is besieged by decidedly unhinged psychopath Anthony Lamb (Carnivale and Halt & Catch Fire’s Toby Huss) and corrupt local cop Huber (Queen of the South’s Ryan O’Nan), forcing Valerie to hole up in the lock-up with Teddy and Viddick, both of whom start working hard to convince her that the only way she’s gonna make it out of here alive tonight is if she cuts one of them loose. This is a darkly comic delight, taking its time so it can build a strong rapport with us while establishing its incredibly strong characters and establish the threat before finally unleashing some proper chaos, and then in the second half we reap the magnificent rewards as we get to indulge in some explosive anarchy with characters we’ve duly become most invested in. Grillo and Butler are both absolutely on fire throughout, both getting once-in-a-career level roles to really sink their teeth into, and it’s a privilege getting to watch these two heavyweights go toe-to-toe in scene after scene of perfectly-written brilliance, while Huss is a genuine (ahem) killer antagonist, investing Lamb with a streak of thoroughly unrestrained (but also occasionally surprisingly reasonable) lunacy that means he steals every scene he’s in, but the film TRULY belongs to Louder, an up-and-comer who is doubtless set to break into the big time SPECTACULARLY thanks to this – Valerie is a seemingly sweet youngster who progressively reveals that she’s actually a secret badass, and she holds her own magnificently when playing against all the incredible top-tier talent on offer, so that in the end Valerie’s easily one of my top female protagonists of 2021. This film is, without a doubt, an undeniable masterpiece, a work of rare genius and superb quality that, if I was brutally honest, is almost TOO GOOD for the lowbrow genre it occupies – seriously, I think the script alone is worthy of some genuine award considerations, and for once Carnahan could even be looking at some actual consideration for his direction too. Not that I’d bet on it – this really isn’t the kind of movie that the Academy and their ilk ever considers, which is a downright shame. Gods know it’d have my vote. Honestly, if this was a purely critical list of THE BEST movies of 2021, I would still have to place this very high indeed …

5. KATE – boy oh boy, Netflix has had QUITE THE YEAR, success after success even AFTER the cinemas reopened, and their very best “cinematic” offering of 2021 (only coming second in their overall output for me due to the sheer fucking AWESOMENESS of Arcane) has a really good chance of going down as one of the all-time great action movies of this new decade. It’s another magnificently simple concept turned into a brilliantly complex piece of work that only this genre can really pull off, The Huntsman: Winter’s Wardirector Cedric Nicolas-Troyan finally delivering on the promise that was only really hinted at in his (largely unwanted sequel) feature debut as he weaves a thrilling and thoroughly engrossing action thriller that quickly builds up to a frantic, breakneck pace and then rarely lets its foot off the accelerator for the remainder of its impressively tight running time. In the end it looks like Birds of Prey & the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn was simply practice for Mary Elizabeth Winstead, who exceeds all expectations here as the titular Tokyo-based hitwoman, who’s looking to retire from a business she’s grown disillusioned with, only to find herself poisoned with Polonium, leaving her with just one night to eliminate those responsible before she dies of acute radiation sickness. To this end, Kate kidnaps wayward teenager Ani (newcomer Miku Martineau), the only person who can gain her access to her uncle, Yakuza boss Kijima (The Wailing’s Jun Kunimura), but as chaos ensues through the night, the pair bond and Kate has to face up to the cold, hard truth of what she’s done before it’s too late. From these deceptively simply seeds a mighty action thriller is born, a flawless, all-but-peerless rollercoaster that quite comfortably rivals the likes of the John Wick films (clearly one of its main influences), Nicolas-Troyan using his dazzling visual flair to exquisite effect to give the consistently spectacular fight sequences, shootouts and car chases a particularly eye-popping edge, while also coaxing some excellent performances from his talented cast – Winstead is phenomenal in one of the very best roles I’ve ever seen her play, a stone-cold badass who owns every fight but also breaks our hearts pretty much every time she has to get serious, while Martineau makes a truly awesome debut in fine style, investing Ani with a cocky swagger that’s just a brittle mask hiding deep reserves of inner pain and trauma, while Kunimura and his fellow Japanese cinema heavyweight Tadanobu Asano (as scheming, ambitious Yakuza underboss Renji) both bring effortless class and gravitas to proceedings, and Woody Harrelson once again reminds us what an impressive dramatic actor he can be as Kate’s mentor and handler, Varrick. Knuckle-whitening, gripping, provocative and powerful in equal measure, this is action cinema at its most concise and effective, another winner for Netflix and the genre as a whole. I just wish I could have seen it on the big screen …

4. NOBODY – do you love the John Wickmovies but you just wish they took themselves a bit less seriously? Well fear not, because Derek Kolstad has delivered fantastically on that score, the JW screenwriter mashing his original idea up with the basic premise of the Taken movies (former government spook/assassin turned unassuming family man is forced out of retirement and shit gets proper trashed as a result) and injecting a big dollop of gallows humour. This time he’s teamed up with Ilya Naishuller, the lunatic genius who directed the deliriously insane but also thoroughly brilliant Hardcore Henry, and the results are absolutely unbeatable, a jet black action comedy bursting with neat ideas, wonderfully offbeat characters and ingenious plot twists. Better Call Saul’s Bob Odenkirk is perfect casting as Hutch Mansell, the aforementioned ex-“Auditor”, a CIA hitman who grew weary of the life and quit to find some semblance of normality with his wife Becca (Connie Nielsen), with whom he’s had two kids. Ultimately, he seems to have “overcompensated”, and his life has stagnated, Hutch following an autopiloted daily routine that’s left him increasingly unfulfilled … then fate intervenes and a series of impulsive choices end up with him falling back on old ways while defending a young woman from drunken thugs on a late night bus ride. Problem is, said lowlifes work for the Russian Mob, specifically Yulian Kuznetsov (Leviathan’s Aleksei Serebryakov), a Bratva boss charged with guarding the Obshak, who must exact brutal vengeance in order to save face. Cue much bloody violence and entertaining chaos … Kolstad’s razor sharp writing married with Naishuller’s singularly BONKERS vision means that the anarchy is dialled right up to eleven, while the gleefully dark sense of humour shot through makes the occasionally surreal and bitingly satirical observations on offer all the more exquisite. Odenkirk is a low-key joy throughout, initially emasculated and pathetic but becoming more comfortable in his skin as he reconnects with his old self, while Serebryakov hams things up spectacularly, chewing the scenery with aplomb; Nielsen, meanwhile, brings her characteristic restrained classiness to proceedings, Christopher Lloyd and the RZA are clearly having the time of their lives as, respectively, Hutch’s retired FBI agent father David and fellow ex-spook half-brother Harry, and there’s a wonderfully game cameo from the incomparable Colin Salmon as Hutch’s former handler, the Barber. Altogether then, this is the perfect marriage of two fantastic worlds – an action-packed thrill ride as explosively impressive as John Wick, but also a wickedly subversive laugh riot every bit as blissfully inventive as Hardcore Henry – not to mention the strong possibilities of another hit action cinema franchise for Kolstad to pen …

3. THE SUICIDE SQUAD – the absolute most fun I had at the cinema in 2021 was this long-awaited (thanks a bunch, COVID) redress of another frustrating imbalance from the hit and miss DCEU superhero franchise, in which Guardians of the Galaxy writer-director James Gunn finally delivered a PROPER Suicide Squad movie after David Ayer’s painfully compromised first stab at the property back in 2016. That movie was enjoyable enough and had some great moments, but ultimately it was a clunky mess, and while some of the characters were done (quite) well, others were painfully botched, even ruined entirely. Thankfully Warner Bros. clearly learned their lesson, giving Gunn free reign to do whatever he wanted, and the end result is about as close to perfect as the DCEU has come to date. Once again the peerless Viola Davis plays US government official Amanda Waller, head of ARGUS and the undisputable most evil bitch in all the DC Universe, who presides over the metahuman prisoners of the notorious supermax Belle Reve Prison, cherry-picking inmates for her pet project Taskforce X, the titular Suicide Squad sent out to handle the kinds of jobs nobody else wants, in exchange for years off their sentences but controlled by explosive implants injected into the base of their skulls. Their latest mission sees another motley crew of D-bags dispatched to the fictional South African island nation of Corto Maltese to infiltrate Jotunheim, a former Nazi facility in which a dangerous extra-terrestrial entity is being developed into a fearful bioweapon, with orders to destroy the project in order to keep it out of the hands of a hostile anti-American regime which has taken control of the island through a violent coup. Where the first Squad felt like a clumsily-arranged selection of stereotypes with a few genuinely promising characters unsuccessfully moulded into a decidedly forced found family, this new batch are convincingly organic – they may be dysfunctional and they’re almost all definitely BAD GUYS, but they WORK, the relationship dynamics that form between them feeling genuinely earned. Gunn has already proven a master of putting a bunch of A-holes together and forging them into band of “heroes”, and he’s definitely pulled the job off again here, dredging the bottom of the DC Rogues Gallery’s barrel for its most ridiculous D-listers and somehow managing to make them compelling. Sure, returning Squad-member Harley Quinn (the incomparable Margot Robbie, magnificent as ever) has already become a fully-realised character thanks to Birds of Prey, so there wasn’t much heavy-lifting to be done here, but Gunn genuinely seems to GET the character, so our favourite pixie-esque Agent of Chaos is an unbridled and unpredictable joy here, while fellow veteran Colonel Rick Flagg (a particularly muscular and game Joel Kinnaman) has this time received a much needed makeover, Gunn promoting him from being the first film’s sketchily-drawn “Captain Exposition” and turning him into a fully-ledged, well-thought-out human being with all the requisite baggage, including a newfound sense of humour; the newcomers, meanwhile, are a fascinating bunch – reluctant “leader” Bloodsport/Robert DuBois (a typically robust and playful Idris Elba), unapologetic douchebag Peacemaker/Christopher Smith (probably the best performance I’ve EVER seen John Cena deliver), and socially awkward and seriously hard-done-by nerd (and by far the most ridiculous DC villain of all time) the Polka-Dot Man/Abner Krill (a genuinely heart-breaking hangdog performance from Ant-Man’s David Dastmalchian); meanwhile there’s a fine trio of villainous turns from the film’s resident Big Bads, with Juan Diego Botta (Good Behaviour) and Joaquin Cosio (Quantum of Solace, Narcos: Mexico) making strong impressions as newly-installed dictator Silvio Luna and his corrupt right hand-man General Suarez, although both are EASILY eclipsed by the typically brilliant Peter Capaldi as louche and quietly deranged supervillain The Thinker/Gaius Greives (although the film’s ULTIMATE threat turns out to be something a whole lot bigger and more exotic). The film is ROUNDLY STOLEN, however, by a truly adorable double act (or TRIPLE act, if you want to get technical) – Daniella Melchior makes her breakthrough here in fine style as sweet, principled and kind-hearted narcoleptic second-generation supervillain Ratcatcher II/Cleo Cazo, who has the weird ability to control rats (and who has a pet rat named Sebastian who frequently steals scenes all on his own), while a particular fan-favourite B-lister makes his big screen debut here in the form of King Shark/Nanaue, a barely sentient anthropomorphic Great White “shark god” with an insatiable appetite for flesh and a naturally quizzical nature who was brilliantly mo-capped by Steve Agee (The Sarah Silverman Project, who also plays Waller’s hyperactive assistant John Economos) but then artfully completed with an ingenious vocal turn from Sylvester Stallone. James Gunn has crafted an absolute MASTERPIECE here, EASILY the best film he’s made to date, a riotous cavalcade of exquisitely observed and perfectly delivered dark humour and expertly wrangled chaos that has great fun playing with the narrative flow, injects countless spot-on in-jokes and irreverent but utterly essential throwaway sight-gags, and totally endears us to this glorious gang of utter morons right from the start (in which Gunn delivers one of the most skilful deep-fakes in cinematic history). Sure, there’s also plenty of action, and it’s executed with the kind of consummate skill we’ve now come to expect from Gunn (the absolute highlight is a wonderfully bonkers sequence in which Harley expertly rescues herself from captivity), but like everything else it’s predominantly played for laughs, and there’s no getting away from the fact that this film is an absolute RIOT. By far the funniest thing I saw all year, and if I’m honest the best of the DCEU offerings to date, too (only the exceptional Birds of Prey can compare) – if Warner Bros. have any sense they’ll give Gunn more to do VERY SOON …

2. A QUIET PLACE, PART II – while UK cinemas finally reopened in early May, I was determined that my first trip back to the Big Screen for 2021 was gonna be something SPECIAL, and indeed I already knew what that was going to be. Thankfully I was not disappointed by my choice – 2018’s A Quiet Placewas MY VERY FAVOURITE horror movie of the 2010s, an undeniable masterclass in suspense and sustained screen terror wrapped around a refreshingly original killer concept, and I was among the many fans hoping we’d see more in the future, especially after the film’s teasingly open ending. Against the odds (or perhaps not), writer-director/co-star John Krasinski has pulled off the seemingly impossible task of not only following up that high-wire act, but genuinely EQUALLING it in levels of quality – picking up RIGHT where the first film left off (at least after an AMAZING scene-setting opening in which we’re treated to the events of Day 1 of the downfall of humanity), rejoining the remnants of the Abbott family as they’re forced by circumstances to up-sticks from their idyllic farmhouse home and strike out into the outside world once more, painfully aware at all times that they must maintain perfect silence to avoid the ravenous attentions of the lethal blind alien beasties that now sit at the top of the food chain. Circumstances quickly become dire, however, and embattled mother Evelyn (Emily Blunt) is forced to ally herself with estranged family friend Emmett (Cillian Murphy), now a haunted, desperate vagrant eking out a perilous existence in an abandoned factory, in order to safeguard the future of her children Regan (Millicent Simmonds), Marcus (Noah Jupe) and their newborn baby brother. Regan, however, discovers evidence of more survivors, and with her newfound weapon against the aliens she recklessly decides to set off on her own in the hopes of aiding them before it’s too late … it may only be his second major blockbuster as a director, but Krasinski has once again proven he’s a heavyweight talent, effortlessly carving out fresh ground in this already well-realised dystopian universe while also playing magnificently to the established strengths of what came before, delivering another peerless thrill-ride of unbearable tension and knuckle-whitening terror. The central principle of utilising sound at a very strict premium is once again strictly adhered to here, available sources of dialogue once again exploited with consummate skill while sound design and score (another moody triumph from Marco Beltrami) again become THE MOST IMPORTANT aspects of the whole production. The ruined world is once again realised beautifully throughout, most notably in the nightmarish environment of a wrecked commuter train, and Krasinski cranks up the tension before unleashing it in merciless explosions in a selection of harrowing encounters which are guaranteed to leave viewers in a puddle of sweat. The director mostly stays behind the camera this time round, but he does (obviously) put in an appearance in the opening flashback as the late Lee Abbott, making a potent impression which leaves a haunting absence that’s keenly felt throughout the remainder of the film, while Blunt continues to display mother lion ferocity as she fights to keep her children safe and Jupe plays crippling fear magnificently but is now starting to show a new spine of steel as Marcus finally starts to find his courage; the film once again belongs, however, to Simmonds, the young deaf actress once and for all proving she’s a genuine star in the making as she invests Regan with fierce wilfulness and stubborn determination that remains unshakeable even in the face of unspeakable horrors, and the relationship she develops with Emmett, reluctant as it may be, provides a strong new emotional focus for the story, Murphy bringing an attractive wounded humanity to his role as a man who’s lost anything and is being forced to learn to care for something again. This is another triumph of the genre AND the artform in general, a masterpiece of atmosphere, performance and storytelling which builds on the skilful foundations laid by the first film as well as setting things up perfectly for a third instalment which is all but certain to follow. I definitely can’t wait.

1. DUNE, PART ONE – throughout all of 2021 (and 2020, to be honest), there was one film I was looking forward to more than ANY OTHER, which made the frequent COVID-caused delays in its release all the more gut-wrenchingly frustrating. Frank Herbert’s original novel, one of the true, definitive space operas which pretty much wrote the rules on how this particular sub-genre is handled today, is basically my favourite book OF ALL TIME, and while I am somewhat a fan (albeit as something of a flawed guilty pleasure) of the clunky and decidedly mismanaged David Lynch film and the far more faithful but ultimately somewhat rote, cold and heartless early-Noughties miniseries, I can agree with pretty much everyone that it had never before really been done the proper justice it deserved in its adaptations. Like other superfans I was rightly worried that this latest attempt could fuck it up just as bad, or even worse, but I started to grow confident when I heard that Denis Villeneuve, the masterful auteur behind Sicario, Arrival and the simply PHENOMENAL Blade Runner 2049 would be taking up the reins, a fellow superfan who simply adores this book and its overarching universe and wanted to do right by it. This confidence grew as we heard and saw more, so by the time the trailers started to emerge I was getting SO EXCITED … and then the pandemic shat all over it and the delays began, as did our agony. Thankfully, almost a year later than it was due, we FINALLY got to see it and it was EVERY BIT worth the wait, AND THEN SOME. There was never ANY DOUBT that this would top out my list for the year, it was simply impossible anything else could compete with this masterpiece. Villeneuve has exceeded expectations just as surely as he did with his Blade Runner sequel, bringing the far-flung future galactic empire of the Padishah Emperor Shaddam Corrino IV to vivid life through stunning cinematography, incredible production and costume design and visual effects so effortlessly seamless they are INDISTINGUISHABLE from reality (in a way, I guess that extra year for them to tinker away actually paid off here), beautifully capturing the moody, austere grandeur of House Atreides’ homeworld Caladan, the grimy industrial horror of House Harkonnen’s homeworld Geidi Prime, and the bleak, windswept majesty of Arrakis, the titular planet which is the only home of the Spice Melange, a substance of such immense worth and power whole worlds will go to war for its control. He’s also once again assembled a truly magnificent ensemble cast of top-notch talent, each and every role perfectly cast to realise some of the most interesting and intricately-crafted characters I’ve ever come across, so many I could be here all day if praised them all, but the real standouts include Timothee Chalamet as Paul Atreides, artfully treading a very fine line in his portrayal of a character who’s essentially a deconstruction and deep critique of the classic Chosen One literary trope, Oscar Isaac and Rebecca Ferguson as doomed lovers Duke Leito Atreides and the Lady Jessica, Josh Brolin as gruff yet earthily sarcastic Atreides warmaster Gurney Halleck, Stellan Skarsgård as the monstrously twisted Baron Vladimir Harkonnen and Charlotte Rampling as coolly superior Bene Gesserit Reverend Mother Gaius Helen Mohiam, while Zendaya and Javier Bardem do a lot with very small roles as Fremen warriors Chani and Stilgar, who I look forward to seeing fleshed out far more when Part Two finally arrives, but my biggest delight here, without a doubt, is my absolute favourite character in the books (and one of my top-five all time fave literary characters PERIOD), Paul’s best friend, the legendary swordmaster Duncan Idaho – I’ll admit when I first heard the casting I was a little dubious, as much as I love Jason Momoa he’s not at all how I’ve always pictured Duncan in my head (for me he’s always been relatively small and lean and, for some reason, very Scottish), but now I can’t imagine him any other way because he just OWNS this role, an unstoppable force of personality, skill and well-restrained rage who completely dominates every scene he’s in. Altogether I could not have asked for a better adaptation – everything here is precision-crafted and pulled off to perfection, a hand-made labour of love that pays full respects to the source material while making it incredibly relevant to today, from Villeneuve’s artful screenplay, co-written with Jon Spaihts (Prometheus, Doctor Strange) and Eric Roth (Forrest Gump, The Insider, Munich), and peerless, evocative direction to the weighty and evocative action, while this could almost stand as a textbook example of how to consistently deliver a large amount of exposition in the most economical, fluid and entertaining manner possible, informing the viewer without ever talking down to us or getting bogged down in dogshit-dull infodumps. The icing on the cake definitely comes in the form of Hans Zimmer’s intriguingly offbeat and challenging score, definitely one of his most original works to date, which perfectly complements the visuals and emotions it accompanies, but then Zimmer’s another Dune superfan who turned down Christopher Nolan’s offer to score Tenet for the opportunity to compose music for his dream gig. Thankfully Warner Bros. have seen sense and greenlit Villeneuve’s intended Part Two so we can see this story completed on the big screen, and I’m thoroughly confident it’ll be just as stylish, evocative, intense, grand, well-appointed, rewarding, epic and emotional as this very long-awaited Part One …

[agentnico]

No Time To Die (2021) Review

I swear this movie came out 2 years ago?... Okay, yes, I agree, that was a cheap gag, but look, the constant postponement of this film's release is in itself a joke! Finally though, it is here.

Plot: James Bond is enjoying a tranquil life in Jamaica after leaving active service. However, his peace is short-lived as his old CIA friend, Felix Leiter, shows up and asks for help.

“I’d rather slash my wrists.” Those were the words spoken by actor Daniel Craig in 2015 for a Time Out magazine interview prior to the release of Spectre. Seemingly it felt as if Craig was done with his signature role as famed British spy James Bond, however be as it may have been, MGM managed to sway away Craig’s suicidal thoughts and cut him a cheque with a sum he simply couldn’t refuse and have him return for a proper final outing. Hollywood business at it’s finest, ladies and gentlemen! But the question is posed, was there a need for another Craig/Bond film? For the previous instalment Spectre was such a let-down that it left a sour taste, or at least I think it did. Honestly, I don’t really remember much of what happened in Spectre, it was such a shoulder-shrugging forgettable feature. The answer however is a positive one, for No Time To Die ends up being worth the wait. All this wait. Though I would’ve found it super amusing if this film came out and turned out to be an absolute stinker, as then everyone would just be sat there in the theatre wondering why the hell we’ve been waiting for this movie this entire time. But nope, it’s a good one.

No Time To Die really feels like a culmination of Daniel Craig’s time as James Bond. And with that merit this movie doesn’t actually feel like a James Bond film. Yes, it has the one-liners and the action set pieces and the typical tropes of a Bond film, however the focus here is very much more on Daniel Craig’s interpretation of the character, and how he managed to turn a weapon into a human. For James Bond at the end of the day was always a killing machine. License to kill and all that jazz was always at the centre of what made the character, however Craig’s take brought a lot of humanity and reality to what was a stereotype. And it’s shown more than ever in No Time To Die, with Daniel Craig delivering a performance of vast emotional gamut. His Bond experiences moments of general happiness and actual love (real love, not just his typical one-night stands he’s known for) to then fury and sadness. My fiancée jokingly made a remark at the beginning of this movie about how petty James Bond is acting in this movie. And I agreeably chuckled at first, for to be fair he was getting offended easily and taking everything so personally without giving it much thought, however the more the movie progressed, the more I understood why he was this way. It made him feel more human, and actually made me care for him. Additionally, the aforementioned element of love plays a big part in this film, for romance is truly at the heart of this one. Bond turns out to be a real loving sweetheart, and this all culminated in one hell of a finale, one that really surprised me with it’s emotional gut punch. Look, I see this film’s ending really dividing audiences as it’s not something you would typically expect from a James Bond movie, however I absolutely relished it and saw it as a perfect swan song for Daniel Craig.

The movie is long. In fact, it’s very long. In fact, it’s too long. It runs at nearly 3 hours and yes, there is a lot of story crammed into this but honestly there are many chunks that could have been cut down and the film would have benefitted from it. For the movie is very good, but it has chunks that drag which does cause the experience to be slightly diminished, however that being said, this is a very well directed movie. Cary Joji Fukunaga (who’s previous work I don’t know much of though I have seen his Netflix limited series Maniac with Jonah Hill and Emma Stone which I do recommend highly) exhibits some strong directing here, balancing moments of real tension using unsettling imagery with moments of levity and good character chemistry. Yes, he brings class and the right amount of epicness to the action sequences, but it was actually the quieter moments that I feel he really excelled at. The opening sequence is especially disturbing, with the way Fukunaga displays this lonely isolated house in the middle of snowy nowhere, and we see a mysterious figure creep towards it wearing a mask so creepy it reminded me of that freaky monkey mask from the horror thriller I See You. A shot from behind a sliding glass door I found especially unnerving. 

Performances across the board are all great. Daniel Craig I’ve already sing praise for, however others are to be mentioned also. Rami Malek manages to take a fairly lacklustre villain and present him in proper vile fashion. He’s truly unpleasant and horrible in this role, and I truly despised him which is what made him perfect for the role. That being said the actual character was weak. There wasn’t much meat to him so to speak. Typical Bond bad guy who wanted to see the world burn. Lea Seydoux returns as Bond’s love interest Madeleine and her chemistry with Craig is wonderful and I really enjoyed seeing her character develop more since the last movie. Returning from Spectre too is the villainous Blofeld played by Christoph Waltz, and though he isn’t in the movie much, I weirdly enjoyed him more this time around. In Spectre is was really forgettable and the script didn’t know what to do with him, whilst here is serves a specific purpose and we also get to enjoy a great scene with him in prison having a battle of wits with Bond. Real good stuff. We also have a couple of new Bond girls, with Lashana Lynch taking on the 007 mantle, and it was nice seeing a very different kind of spy in her. Her and Bond bicker quite a bit, however natural they become buddies and they are the better for it. And Lynch can be easily added to the list of powerful badass women on-screen. Ana de Armas also appears in what is a little Knives Out reunion, and unfortunately she’s only in the movie for one sequence, but it’s actually a great sequence with her putting a new spin on the Bond girl stereotype, bringing charm, swagger and humour and riffing off good banter with Craig. Shame we only see so little of her. The likes of Naomie Harris, Ben Whishaw and Ralph Fiennes also return, and even Jeffrey Wright takes a break from pondering What If? scenarios to make a little comeback. 

No Time To Die definitely stands next to the better Daniel Craig Bond films alongside Casino Royale and Skyfall, and it’s a true culmination of all of them, whilst still managing to ignore and forget the existence of Quantum of Solace, which is good, because Quantum of Solace sucks and I can’t believe I even managed to bring it up again!! Regardless, what a way to send off Daniel Craig on a proper high, and really refreshing to actually witness a Bond movie that features feelings and emotions. In fact, it’s pure Valentine’s Day essential viewing, so mark your calendars for next year, as you now know what film you have to rewatch on February 14th 2021! 

Overall score: 8/10

[hotvintagepoll]

Propaganda

Heather Angel (The Informer, The Undying Monster)—no propaganda submitted

Katharine Hepburn (Bringing Up Baby, The Philadelphia Story, The African Queen)—This woman. I have been obsessed with her for years. I know the urban legend is a popular one at this point of her walking around set in her underwear when her pants were stolen and she was left with only a skirt, but the pants thing is honestly enough for her to be the hottest in the room in my book. She refused to wear anything else at a time when the public in general and especially the studios did not like that. She was independent, stubborn, and so so very capable. Competency kink anyone? Also, if you want one final way that Katharine's entire life was saying "fuck you" to the establishment, it started young! Her mother took her to suffrage events, and she never got rid of that attitude of justice. I feel like I have barely scratched the surface of all the ways she was such a badass that I'm turning into a rambling mess instead.

This is round 1 of the bracket. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage woman.

[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]

Heather Angel propaganda:

Katharine Hepburn propaganda:

I'm sure one million people will submit her as an iconic Hollywood star but that iconicness might lead people to forget just how insanely hot she was like she had it ALL she was skilled she was funny she was smart she was beautiful AND she was likely bisexual

The single word I would use to explain Katherine Hepburn's appeal is *range*. In her acting career, that meant covering all the ground between lush period dramas and the comedies she did with Carey Grant and Spencer Tracey. In terms of hotness, it meant an uncanny ability to bring anything from a Dietrich-esque androgyny to some of the best Classic Hollywood Glamour you will ever see.

Katharine hep was so cool. The VIBES, the INDEPENDENCE,,, living life on her own terms.

she just had this.... bearing to her, this power. she could be funny, even silly (like in bringing up baby) but also so regal and elegant. she was nobody's fool and dear GOD that's so hot

Fancam link

She’s not only stunningly gorgeous (those eyes that pierce your soul! a jawline you could cut glass with!) but her delivery and physical presence in roles gives off confidence and authority in such a sexy way (truly the biggest dick energy of Old Hollywood). Her fiery energy in The Philadelphia Story? Unmatched.

God she's. She's so hot y'all. She has the range!!!!! Funny and dramatic and lovely

She IS the transatlantic accent. Classically gorgeous and such a strong personality.

She's literally one of the funniest women to ever live! She goes shot for shot with Cary Grant in Philadelphia Story and we damn well love her for it! She's the most annoying creature to ever live in Bringing Up Baby but she's so insane and funny that we simply cannot help but fall in love with her (and root for her to give Grant an aneurysm!)

i know she's accounted for but i really want to be sure someone has submitted the scene in bringing up baby where she's pretending to be a gangster

She simply stuns onscreen; you cannot do anything but be captivated by her presence. Also a non-gender-conforming icon and mild tumblr celebrity by virtue of that one picture from The Warrior's Husband (stage play).

Katharine Hepburn was out here casually changing the lives of young butch lesbians with her gender swag! She wore pants even when people said she shouldn’t, she refused to marry or have kids, and she wore menswear in at LEAST one movie!

Someone's got to mention it, but she's won the most Oscars out of any performer and is largely considered one of the greatest actresses ever. She's got an incredible voice, an incredible presence, and she absolutely steals every scene she's in. She was private person and deemed standoffish and unapproachable, but she was also profoundly concerned for people's rights and was an outspoken supporter of abortion access. Finally, the Katharine Hepburn slacks look is just iconic. I mean look at her.

If I start thinking about her face for too long I will cry she is so so hot. Katherine is so charismatic and charming in everything she appears in - watch her adopt a leopard and fall in love with her. Also she has the biggest dick energy ever (she and her pal Lauren Bacall share that accolade). Also had an incredibly long and varied career from screw ball comedies to serious dramas - she’s a queen of the screen and I adore her.

(I hope someone else submits real propaganda but just in case they don't:) Cries. Screams. Wails. The woman who singlehandedly made me realize I was bi. A real "do i want to look like her. be her. or be with her.' crisis, where the answer was all three. Holy shit please all three.

[gon2ba1e]

MK11: My thoughts (positive)

I have very mixed feelings about this game. Not just on its own but also in comparison to the most recent previous games. On one hand, it has blown my mind with exciting new stuff. On the other hand, it left me bitterly disappointed. For now, I’d like to share what impressed me about MK11.

Part 1

1. Shang Tsung

First and foremost, this man totally captured my attention the moment his trailer was dropped. With his inclusion in Mortal Kombat Aftermath, Shang Tsung easily became the best thing about MK11. It helps immensely the sorcerer of Outworld is voiced by the OG actor from 1995′s Mortal Kombat Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa. He’s still got it! Shang Tsung’s cold and calculating demeanor, his deceptive ploys, and his fighting style were amazing to say the least. Having him being the creator of Kronika’s crown was an excellent, as well as him using the crown for himself. And, as heartless as this may sound, but I much prefer Shang Tsung’s final ending. He deserved that win and I’m no goodie two shoes. I genuinely hope to see more of Shang Tsung in the future.

2. Spawn

I was first introduced to Spawn via Screwattack’s Deathbattle. I knew right then and there Spawn was a badass. After watching some of the TV show and his movie, this fact was further solidified. Spawn’s god like powers, no bullshit attitude, and stellar voice actor Keith David make Spawn the King of the Mortal Kombat universe. I also love how they tease the familial relationship between Malebogia and Kronika’s family. It would make a kickass spin off series. Plus, this Hellspawn has the most bitchin set of foul language dialogue. He easily towers over everyone else. Hands down, Spawn is the most dope DLC character NRS decided to include in Mortal Kombat 11.

3. Mileena

I always thought Mileena was one of the more interesting characters of Mortal Kombat. Her upbringing was crazy and her development as a pinnacle part of Mortal Kombat was fascinating. I especially liked Mileena in MKX. I was admittedly sad when I witnessed her death scene (Fuck you D’Vorah). Like everyone else in the Mortal Kombat community, I was thrilled to hear Mileena was to be added in the Mortal Kombat roster. Like Shang Tsung and Spawn, Mileena’s gameplay trailer blew my mind. Her intro dialogues was also just as entertaining. The intros I love most are the ones where Mileena perfectly imitates Kitana’s voice. I was fucking speechless. Mileena’s hybrid fighting style, her unwavering savagery, and brilliantly talented voice actress Kari Wahlgren were a real treat to have. I can say without a doubt Mileena is the most vicious character in the Mortal Kombat roster. She’ll always be one of my favorites. 

4. 1995 Mortal Kombat actor skins

As someone who watched the original film at a young age, I was stoked to hear NRS brought back the original actors for Johnny Cage, Sonya Blade, and Christopher Lambert. Though they may not have been top notch with their voice acting, I very much noticed the effort they each put in. I was anything but disappointed. Some of the intros the original three voiced are better than the ones done by the MK11 voice actors. Props to NRS on this decision. I appreciated the nostalgia.

5. Friendships

For a game containing some of the most graphic violence, it was comforting to see Friendships added to the game. Many of them surprised me. Some of them I loved. Some of them I didn’t. My favorites include Jax Briggs, Mileena, Fujin, Scorpion, Rambo, Robocop, Kung Lao, and Lui Kang. Jax had the most entertaining friendship. Mileena had the most adorable. Fujin, Rambo, and Kung Lao reminded me of activities I did or wanted to do as a kid. Robocop was very much fitting for his character. Overall, very well done on the friendships.

[mrstsung]

Here's some shang x me self ship dynamics.

Technically i hc i initiated the whole relationship officially. But shang showed interest before i did. But again. I made the move,i took a risk.

But shang in the same vein would totally be the type to say we are dating/banging without me knowing. Or even brag about it to his enemies. Tho we really aren't quite an item yet. As he doesn't wanna screw it up with me. Gdi shang.

Also i totally hc shang falls for the "what's updog" and "deez nutz" every, damn, time. And he hates it. Lmao

We both want kids but.....the island?...the kombat?....yeah kinda makes that difficult.

We would totally die for each other. Tho we really don't want to.

We spoil the fuck outta each other and would definitely stand up for each other....viciously.

Im the first to apologize, not gonna sugarcoat that. Shang would after me. But sometimes I'd do it just to not argue with him. Even tho he knows he's wrong. Sometimes he's the type to push buttons. Not because he genuinely means it. But because he loves seeing me riled up,flustered,or throwing hands. Lmao. This binch right here, i swear to elder gods!

Shang tsung is a Wakes up earlier than me type. He drinks his tea,watches the sun rise. And makes me feels comfortable. He tries to let me sleep as much as i can. Again he's a bastard,but a sweet one.

He is definitely the type to approach me first. Meanwhile my anxious ass is dying inside

He is also definitely the one to purpose.

I say i love you first. But when i hear him say it for the first time. Possibly some time after i say it. I would cry. Because shang i see as the type that shows it,not says it very often. But when he says it. HE MEANS IT!

He is definitely prone to hiding his feels AT FIRST,he is so tsundere af about it. Im sorry. But over time. After the ice has broke,and we establish something. Oh he is so fucking clingy. He can and will show me off. He's the tsundere at first but afterwards he's the "i fucking love my wife!" Type guy. And also the "i will kill everyone in this room if you even breathe wrong around her!" Type of guy.

Depending on the situation,we both could be oblivious. More likely me because adhd go "brrrrr" oof.

Shang is a goth nerd. Binch legit has stated he is an inventor and a sorcerer. He's a damn nerd with a goth aesthetic ok?!

I am too but im less nerd then him.

For pda, it depends. He's definitely physical. As for me. Im cuddly. And i can go either eqy verbal or physical. Im game for both. But as long as your tounge isn't down my throat,and eyes dont stare for too long. I don't really care. I don't mind pda. But i definitely am more cool with it than shang. But shang is a show off so he'd be down for pda to spite people,show me off,show his enemies or even minions whos the big dragon boss so to speak,lol. Hell sometimes he's feeling extra lovey dovey or cheeky that day. Who knows with this man?

We both "be gay,do crime" but in different methods.

He's classy,so I'll here a "darling,dear,wife,beloved,maybe even a beautiful" but sometimes I'll hear a "butterfly,blossom,my treasure,maybe a honey(omfg shang tsung saying honey! 👀💖🥺. This is both wholesome but hot too because his low voice in mk11 is unf. Thnx cary hiroyuki tagawa for once again igniting my voice kink. Smfh)

As for me? I say everything and anything. I'd call him a bitch endearingly. But also bro/brah/bruh as well. Lol. Called him bao bao once,he blushed a hundred shades red. Thank the elder gods that nobody was around. He would have yelled at me. Lmfao. XD. (Look im a brat ok?....he loves this tho)

I trust more easier with him than he does me. Buuuuut he stil trusts me pretty high.

His jealousy meter and horni(tm) meter is off the fucking charts. The horni(tm) meter is more due to this binch probably hasn't gotten some in so long he's practically jumping at me the second i wash up on the beach. Lol.

But he wants to keep it cool. So he plays it off as being mysterious,dark,and badass like he usually does. But inside he's just eyeing my ass up n down like the touch starved silver fox/sneky stud he is.

His clingness is lesser than me but still pretty high. It depends on the situation and mood.

Hope this covers some of it. Tried explaining the chart a bit more.

May make more of these.

[thevindicativevordan]

Terra-Man

I created a section for Superman Rogues in my Superman masterpost so I feel obligated to actually write about a character for there. But I don’t really want to dive into the nuances of Lex or any of the big guns just yet, so how about we talk about a guy most people don’t even know exists?

Terra-Man friends! The Pre-Crisis version was created by Cary Bates, Curt Swan, and Dick Dillin. Based on Clint Eastwood’s “Man with No Name”, he was a child of the old American Wild West, with his father killed by an alien. Young Tobias Manning was then adopted by said alien out of guilt. The alien took Tobias with him out into the cosmos, trained him, and crafted high tech weaponry for him that resembled weapons used by 19th century cowboys. He was also gifted with slowed aging that gave him nigh-immortality. Tobias killed his alien guardian and struck out on his own as an interstellar criminal, taking the name “Terra-Man” to homage his Earth roots. His Pre-Crisis fights with Superman varied between him being treated as a bizarre gag villain and a deadly serious threat.

Spoilers: The guy who ages up Superman is Tobias. He actually comes across as a legitimate threat in the story, using preptime to outwit Clark repeatedly:

And it was the first time I had read a story with Terra-Man in it that made me go “this guy could be a legitimate threat”. Of course Bates had more creativity in his pinkie than a lot of creators produce in their entire careers, and the Post-Crisis revamp of Terra-Man really sucked:

They got rid of his cowboy hat (a creative felony if I ever saw one), and revamped him as a businessman who had a crisis of conscience over the environmental damage he was causing, and thus set out on a crusade to protect the environment. They kept the high tech weaponry, and gave a lot of it an ecological spin, he had gadgets that allowed him to drain Superman’s solar levels to make him susceptible to weaponry, but the background motivation has aged poorly. Given the current environmental state of the world, more people would probably cheer this version of Tobias on as a hero (just look at Green Arrow or the Poison Ivy fans!) than want to see Superman beat him up. Also he still talked like an old school cowboy for some bizarre reason? Or maybe that was just how writers thought every Texan talked.

Anyway he ended up getting ripped in half by Black Adam and basically has been gone ever since as far as I’m aware:

 So he’s been absent for two whole reboots now, New 52 & Rebirth, so I feel entitled to give my idea for how to make him work as a Superman Rogue. First up: his design. None of the ones I posted above really worked for me, none of them look “cool”, and if Venom and Carnage have taught us anything it’s that 90% of why some villains stick around is that they look cool. The Pre-Crisis one is too plain looking, he looks generic, the Post-Crisis look lacks a hat and the cowboy theme and is thus unacceptable. Luckily there’s already two very cool looking sources to draw on for a new design:

Guy front and center is Terra-Man from the Legion of Superheroes cartoon, and my first introduction to the character. His backstory was heavily modified for the show, but he was a stone cold badass, forcing Imperiex and Superman X to team up to beat him. Think Cad Bane from The Clone Wars by way of Terminator and you basically get the gist. I honestly wouldn’t mind just straight up taking that design and adding the mustache of the comic version. But there’s another source to draw from:

How the hell this guy never caught on I’ll never know. Maybe because Morrison never gave him enough badass moments during their Action run? But Nimrod has a very cool design, and he also has some crazy weapons like a gun that shoots telepathic bullets, he already feels somewhat like a Terra-Man revamp to me. I’d take the idea of a helmet/full body suit and the crazy high-concept tech weapons from Nimrod & Pre-Crisis Terra-Man, and combine it with the color scheme, basic outfit and hat of the animated Terra-Man. That would be a really cool design that would get people interested in Tobias I feel.

Second off: the name. Maybe I was just dumb as a kid, but I was always wondering why animated Terra-Man never used his earthbender powers. He clearly had them, why else would he call himself Terra-Man and not Space Cowboy? In the interest of retroactively justifying my young self’s stupidity, I propose a new name: The Terran. I think that does a better job of conveying what his deal is, that he’s a former resident of Earth aka Terra who has gone out and made a name for himself in the cosmos. Think of the children who will no longer be confused about why he’s not throwing boulders at his foes. I rest my case.

Third and finally: The motivation. Why does this guy show up on Earth? What’s his deal? Why does he hate Superman? Well I think there’s some easy justification in explaining why he would finally return to Earth in the first place by making him a hunter like Nimrod was. Terran is out to hunt the most dangerous creatures of a species for sport and profit. Guess who has an Intergalactic Zoo in his Fortress, containing last members of extinct species some of whom posses hides or organs that would fetch high prices on the galactic black market? That’s an easy way to justify why the two would first come to blows, and where the root of the contempt for each other would begin.

But that would only be the beginning. See there’s some very interesting twists on the Superman concept with Tobias. He inverts a lot of the core components of Superman. He’s a human who was abducted and adopted by aliens as a child. He got his “powers” from his alien father, and his “name” from the aliens he worked for and killed. He’s a human straight out of Earth’s past, a literal Man of Yesterday. I think you could do some very interesting stuff by contrasting the two, and one of the big ways to do it would be to make Tobias Manning gay.

Yeah yeah get your jokes out of the way but hear me out: Tobias is from 19th century America, not exactly known for it’s tolerance of homosexuality (or anything non-WASP really). Part of why Tobas stayed away for so long then was that he felt alienated from his home planet. He thought he would never be accepted there, and thus stayed away and tried to carve out a life for himself in space where at least no one looked down on him for who he loved. So when he finally comes back and sees the way things have improved he’s overjoyed. Finally he can be himself among his own kind, he doesn’t have to stay away from Earth anymore, he can stay here and reconnect with his heritage. But then he runs into another barrier: He was raised according to 19th century American norms as a kid, then by alien norms for the rest of his life. He has zero in common with regular humans in the 21st century DCU Earth. His speech is antiquated and peppered with alien words no one understands, marking him as odd. Nobody shares any of his interests, and his job, which would’ve been cool and badass in the 19th century, now invites disgust in everyday conversations. Tobias may have been a human born on Earth, but he was born in the Wild West and raised in space, and he’s become totally alienated from the rest of humanity.

Enter Superman, an alien born on another planet but perfectly able to live amongst humanity since he was raised by them and educated in their modern standards. He’s white-passing and straight, and those two attributes help him be accepted. It would absolutely piss Tobias off that this alien is viewed as more human than he is, is accepted where he is not, and that would fuel the fires of resentment. So when he and Clark cross paths, Tobias is out for blood. Not just to beat/kill Superman, but to embarrass him, humiliate him, make him the outcast for everyone to point and gawk at. Also killing one of the last Kryptonians would really help cement Tobias’ reputation as a stone cold badass hunter which doesn’t hurt either.

On Superman’s side, part of him would absolutely despise Tobias for being a poacher, for hunting and killing endangered species, for trying to kill or humiliate him. He’d be put off by Tobias’ 19th century ideal of manhood and enjoyment of killing, something Superman wholeheartedly abhors. But on the other hand he would absolutely empathize with Tobias’ frustration. Clark has felt alienated from humanity at points himself, but also recognizes that he was lucky to look and be like he does given where he landed. He’d want to try to reach this guy, to connect with him, given how much he can sympathize with the longing for a place where you can be yourself without fearing rejection from others. Whether he would ever succeed is anyone’s guess.

I realize the possible pitfalls in making a prominent villain, who is also a cowboy gay, but I do think what I have here is an interesting way at looking at the very concept of “alieness”, a topic often explored in Superman stories. I’d add a prominent gay member to Superman’s supporting cast as a counterbalance too, either to the Daily Planet or the Metropolis Special Crimes Unit.

So yeah that’s how I’d revamp Tobias into the Terran.

[popculturebuffet]

Final Space: And Into The Fire Review or Now with 110% More Homoerotic Telepathy

Welcome  new and old to my first Final Space review! If you’ve never seen the blog before, and given this is the first “new” series i’ve covered as it come out in some time that’s probably quite a few of you, welcome. I’m Jake, I do recaps and reviews of various animated shows and comics, mostly just stuff I want to do, often on comission (5 dollars an episode if theres any episode of the first two seasons of this show or any episode of any other show you’d like tos ee me cover), or for my patreon patreon.com/popculturebuffet. And it is my utmost honor to add this show to my rotating roster of shows I cover as they come out. 

I friggin love Final Space. I was intrigued by it back when TBS released the animatics alongside Close Enough (Wth the two shows ironically finally together on HBO max as of earlier this month), for their doomed block. I heard a lot of good things about season 1.. and let it get away from me, not watching it till Season 2. But both seasons had more than enough to pull me in with intriguging characters, even greater jokes and a truly unique idea for a premise involving giant monsters, an edltrich god and lots of cookies. 

So while it took an extra year given Covid, I’m super friggin pumped to get into season 3 at long last after the hell of a cliffhanger, especially since ironically last night I saw Steven Yeun’s oscar nominated performance in “Minari”. Now i get to watch him play a cat teenager again too.. and in a few days Mark friggin Grayson. It’s a good week to be a fan of his is what i’m saying and a good week in general. 

Previously on Final Space Yo!: Since it’s been a year and while the series provides  a recap , I’m going to be doing these anyway so:

Our heroes finally got all 5 dimensional keys and freed Bolo, and in the process also freed Avacato from Invictus, the horrifying entity controlling final space. Meanwhile Tribore got Sheryl to stop being a selfish prick and she joined the team trying to be a better mother from now on. But freeing Bolo came at a high cost as Nightfall sacrified herself as the sixth key (KVN was natrually both Gary and Bolo’s first choice, but was inllegible. ) So we ended the season with our heroes entering Final Space and Gary reuniting with Quinn.... while Invictus loomed. So over a year later we finally get some answers so join me under the cut for spoilers, recaps, and homoerotic text ahoy. 

Something i’m doing since both the roster keeps changing.. and as I correctly guessed from the trailer, and the general tone of the promos for this season, that everyone won’t be all together all season.. or even in one piece.. i’ll be doing a silver age style roll call to let us know who all we have on the Team Squad for the episode Roll Call: Gary, Quinn, Avacato, Little Cato, Ash, Fox, KVN, HUE, AVA, Sheryl, Bolo, and Tribore

So we pick up right where we left off, Gary tearfully reuniting with Quinn, with Quinn wishing he hadn’t come for her, and Gary being Gary naturally having ignored that, and actually been more determined since that made it forbidden which made it extra tempting and him want to extra do it. God I missed this glorious idiot let me tell you. 

So things are quickly interrupted by invictus, who turns out to be a giant flaming head.. thing... and chases them and the crimson light, which has to start speeding with our heroes tethered to the outside, Quinn holding onto Gary. 

So we get one hell of a thrilling chase as the Crimson Light outspeeds the demon head and runs into two titans, but Bolo shows up to take out one, with Mooncake trying his dimension shattering blast thingy on Invictus.. and naturlaly g ven this is the big bad we need to show off how horrying they are, and it does NOTHING. But Gary catches his little buddy so we’re alright. 

Sheryl also shows off her badass bonafieds by LIGHTFOLDING THROUGH A TITAN... granted she still has some parenting skills to learn as “lightfolding while your son is hanging out the back through an edltrich god” really isn’t a motherly thing to do.. but neither is trying to murder your child several times or blaming him for how shitty your life turned out so ANYTHING is a step up for her. 

But.. it’s not enough. While she does manage to kill ONE the Crimson Light is too badly damaged to go on and we get two tragic deaths in one go... The Team Squad is forced to abandon the Crimson Light.. and AVA is too damaged to Upload into HUE. “I’m Sad” “For who?” “For you.. and for us. “ God damn Tom Kenny is amazing. You don’t need me telling you that, but sometimes you need a reminder. 

So our heroes end up on a desolate mystery world, stranded in final space with no ship, no suplies and no hope. The only thing to do now is survivie and hope they can continue the mission at some point. 

ONE MONTH LATER

Things have not gotten any better, as naturally , our heroes have only found weird cartoon eyed worms that regrow their heads when you bite them off. So while this means unlimited food, it’s also disgusting and Garry hates it. “This may be a head but it tastes like a butt”. Quinn and Tribore are with him and Quinn hasn’t been ready to talk about her experiences trapped in this hellscape and still isn’t but being a good dude, Gary dosen’t push her on it. Though the weird red veiny thing on her arm tells me maybe one of you should speed that up before she explodes or gets cronnenburgy. Just saying. I’ll also say i’m not huge on the one month time skip, as while I feel they probably have a reason for being that specific i’ts a bit TOO long and I question why have that long a period of a jump, not the longest but still long enough for things to happen with nothing changingin that time? Still it’s a minor nitpick in an otherwise fantastic episode so I can let it go, I just don’t get it. 

What we do get is some Gary Corpses dropping and Invictius puppeting them... i’m with gary that is bowel openingly scary. I also do like how despite the FAR more dire circumstances, they still get in the requisite shenanigans this series requires. I’ts not to the network mandated subplot levels where it distracts, but it’s enough to help ease the terror of the situation and isn’t around for situations like the opening where it really SHOULDN’T be. As the series always has when something big happens, the bollocks goes away. Once we’re in between we can get back to literal pissing contests, KVN leading a crowd to their deaths and HUE in a pimp hat like god intended. 

So yeah our heroes have to outrun the horrible horde of Gary’s, though Little Cato catches on something’s wrong as Tribore makes gary cary him as foreshadowing for later and Sends mooncake down to asssit. Our heroes escape.. but a cave in happens.

After the break, Gary wakes up confused with the party now split in two: Gary, Quinn, KVN, Tribore and HUE on one side and Avacato, Ash, Fox, Little Cato and Sheryl on the other. So Gary does the logical thing... and take his shirt off telling Avacato to feel him. 

I mean I didn’t even ship them before this scene but... Gary claims because of their bond he can telepahtically connect with Avacato. That’s normal Gary shenanigans.. except not only does he shrug off his girlfriend asking why they can’t do that.. but it WORKS. We have a scene of the two telepahtically talking in a wheatfield that is so homerotic I guarantee there only wasn’t the Careless Whisper sax because they couldn’t afford it.. or their saving it for later this season. Look sometimes you don’t ship a ship because you just.. dont’ care that strongly one way or another and sometimes you just need an incredibly gay scene to see the light. Same thing happened with Weblena same thing here. 

Fox also says “that was glorious to watch” same man. That was freaking art. So our heroes split up into three plots. As usual for me

Team Gary: So yeah... Triobore’s pregnant. No way to really softball into that. He’s been pregnant this whole time. So we get a stupid and mildly horrifying gross out sequence with Gary having to look Triobore in teh eyes and Quinn having to “uncork him”. Which is code for ... you know what i’m not going to say it. If you’ve seen the episode you know and if not your better off not visualizing it trust me. Point is this whole sequence is dumb and the worst part of the episode by far. And the series CAN do good gross out. While Olan Rodgers regrets it, the pissing contest was one of the funniest scenes of season 2, and managed to make a gross idea on paper actually pretty damn funny. This.. this is just “Haha males giving birth and tribore’s an asshole”. There’s no joke here just a .. plug. .. gah.. the vomit is rising let me tell you. 

We do get something good out of this nightmare, Tribore’s son who hatches as the army of gary’s dig their way in, Quanstranstro, who rapidly ages into a stylsih spanish speaking adult badass. He is fucking awesome and a great addition to the team and the sheer.. oddity of his birth is wonderful even if the actual birthing was not. Then the climax happens so before that. 

Team Avacato:

Avacato and Co come across a sleeping giant robot cyborg .. thingy. Naturally Fox wakes him up. Little Cato remains not suprised. It occelates between panicking over it’s legs being gone and amenisa and is pretty damn funny. It’s voiced by John Dimagio. But it gets serious as we find out nothing has ever made it out of final space, and things.. change the longer there there. And Quinn’s been there several months if not a year. Whuh oh. This part is much better both due to better jokes and plot advancment.. though again Quanstrano is still fucking amazing. 

Team Bolo: Bolo meanwhile returns and fights a titan, and has mooncake help him rather htan join the others, but looses, hitting the planet with his body.. I mean he might not get back up.. but the impact shatters the caverns and causes an explosion. Everyone but Gary, Quinn, KVN and HUE are MIA, as our remaining party find earth floating overhead. 

TO BE CONTINUED> 

Final Thoughts: A decent start to the season. Like I said the whole birthing sequence can die in a fire and reminds me of the terrible comedy subplots adult swim wanted grafted onto two episodes.. but otherwise it’s a tense stark opener that sets up the bleak tone while still keeping the series rediciulous shenanigans in tact. It’s the perfect welcome back after so long. I mean the gay telepathy alone would make it a winner. 

Next Time on This Blog: We dive into a little history with HIsteria. See you at the next rainbow.