#it is way too early for this shit but here i am.

[helen-with-an-a]

I am an adult epilogue

Heyyyy. So who know that I am an adult ending would cause so much debate ahahaha. But real talk, thank you so much for your support and comments - I love them all <3<3<3

Here is the epilogue to I am an adult. It is set at the UWCL final 2025 (getting the manifesting in early) and is fluffy to make up for the angst in the series hehe.

Shout out to @lyak12 for the inspiration and hype on this - lots of love to ya. Also she is the reason this is out earlier than planned <3

Anyways, I hope you enjoy

Part 1 : Part 2 : Part 3 : Part 3.5 : Part 4 : Part 5 : Part 6 : Part 7 : Epilogue

Barça Femeni x Reader ; Lena Oberdorf x Reader

Description: R and Lena go watch Barça win the UWCL

TW: Shit do be fluffy as fuck

Lisbon was sunny and welcoming. The gentle golden light spilled into the hotel room, the white curtains dancing in the salty air. It was early, far too early to be awake. The sun filtered through, pulling you from sleep’s embrace. The city outside was just beginning to stir; workmen’s chatter and the clatter of the trams drifted up from the streets below. The aroma of freshly baked bread and brewing coffee wafted through the open window, mingling with the scent of the sea. You lay there for a moment, savouring the peaceful transition from dream to reality. How different everything was from this time last year.

You groaned as you shifted onto your back, stretching slightly to relieve the aches gained overnight. It was warm in bed – the good kind of warm, the type that made you never want to leave its confines again. You shimmied your way across the bed a little more, relishing the source of the heat. Lena’s skin was smooth under your fingers, the muscles soft yet firm as your hands danced around her bare waist. Her face was turned away from you, her dark hair fanning across the pillow, loose pieces falling across her forehead. She stirred slightly at your touch, a contented sigh escaping her lips. You smiled, pressing a featherlight kiss on her shoulder, relishing in her presence, relaxing into the warmth of her body next to yours.

The past year had been a whirlwind. From moving clubs to moving countries to building a life with Lena, but now, in this serene moment, everything felt right. You were in Lisbon with the love of your life. You were about to watch your best friends, your family, compete for their fourth title. You had just come off the back of a fantastic first season at Bayern and had about two weeks off before the Euros preparation began. Everything was so different from this time last year.

You closed your eyes, listening to the symphony of morning sounds mingling with the steady rhythm of Lena's breathing. The faint calls of seagulls, the distant hum of the city waking up, all formed a backdrop to the intimate quiet of your hotel room. You felt the bed shift as Lena rolled over, muttering something in her sleep as she flopped onto you, her breath puffing gently against your collarbones. You gazed down at her, her eyelashes fluttering slightly as she dreamt. There was something magical about these quiet mornings you had grown to love, the world outside moving at its own pace while you and Lena enjoyed the luxury of stillness. You could feel the rise and fall of her chest, each breath syncing with yours in a timeless, perfect rhythm.

Your mind wandered back to the adventures and challenges of the past year. Moving to a new country had been daunting, with the language barrier, the differences, and the new playing style, but Lena had been your anchor through it all. Her unwavering support made the transition easier, helping you establish yourself in the team and navigate the new league. She had encouraged you to return to Barcelona whenever you could. Christmas had been a whirlwind of travel, stopping off quickly to see Lena’s family before spending New Year's in the Spanish city. You savoured your time in the city you once called home, basking in the sun that seemed too rare in Munich.

As the minutes passed, the city outside grew livelier, the sounds of daily life becoming more pronounced; the workers on their morning commutes, the tourists discovering the metropolis. Yet, in your cosy haven, time seemed to slow down. You stroked Lena's back gently, your touch light and reverent. The sun continued to rise, casting a golden glow that bathed the room in warmth and light.

You felt a deep sense of contentment as you lay there, holding each other. Moments slipped past as you reminisced on the season gone by - the highest joys, the lowest lows, and the simple moments in between. Everything seemed so … complete … yet so different from how you would have imagined your life.

Eventually, Lena stirred again, this time her eyes fluttering open. She looked up at you, her gaze sleepy but filled with affection. "Guten Morgen," she murmured, her voice husky with sleep.

"Good morning," you replied softly, brushing a stray lock of hair from her forehead.

She smiled a slow, sweet smile that made your heart swell. "Hast Du gut geschlafen?"

"I did. It was perfect," you said, and it was true. With Lena beside you, everything was perfect.

“Wh-what time is it?” she asked drowsily, her hand coming to rub the sleep from her eye.

“Um… a little after 8, I think,” you replied, glancing at the blinking clock on the edge of the TV.

Lena groaned softly, snuggling closer to you. "Do we have to get up yet?"

You chuckled, running your fingers through her hair. "Not just yet. We have some time before we need to head out."

"Gut," she murmured, her voice barely above a whisper. "Ich möchte noch ein bisschen so bleiben.”

You tightened your arms around her, enjoying the feeling of her body against yours. “Ok, Liebe.” The world outside could wait. For now, all that mattered was this moment.

The atmosphere inside the stadium was electric. The crowd was buzzing with anticipation, the energy palpable and infectious. Thousands of Culers filled the stands, making it feel like you were back at the Johan for an El Clásico; flags were waved high, scarves were held aloft, and faces were painted in Blaugrana. As the clock ticked down to kickoff, the noise level increased. Chants and songs erupted from different sections of the stadium, each group of supporters trying to outdo the other. Drums pounded rhythmically, creating a heartbeat that pulsed through the crowd. The sound of drums and air horns added to the cacophony, a symphony of support that echoed through the vast arena.

As you weaved your way through the crowd, you felt Lena’s hand skim your lower back, her fingers resting on the bare skin. You looked back over your shoulder, smiling at her as you caught her eye.

“Stay close to me, Schatz,” she called, her body moving closer subconsciously. “I don’t want you to get lost.” You smiled at her concern, switching the half-full cup in your other hand to interlock your fingers with hers.

“Now, you can’t go anywhere either,” you teased, pressing a kiss on the back of her knuckles.

The two of you continued to navigate through the throng of fans, stopping occasionally to take photos of each other and with the fans, the excitement around you intensifying with every step. The smell of food mixed with the fresh scent of the afternoon air, creating an intoxicating blend that was quintessentially football. Vendors shouted their wares, adding to the lively atmosphere, while children darted between legs, their faces alight with the joy of the occasion. This … this is what helped you fall in love with the game as a little girl – balancing high on your parent's shoulders, joining in on the chants until your voice was hoarse, grinning so widely your face hurt.

The stadium loomed large above you, the sun beating down, promising a perfect day for football. As you reached your seats, you felt a rush of exhilaration. The view of the pitch was perfect, and you could see the players warming up, their movements sharp and precise. Lena squeezed your hand, her excitement mirroring your own.

“Starting XIs … go,” she laughed as you demanded her answer. You bickered the time away, questioning the potential lineups, the tactics, the score line.

The crowd's energy reached a fever pitch as the players took their positions on the field, and the referee prepared to blow the whistle. The roar that erupted when the game began was deafening, a collective outpouring of passion and support. You and Lena were swept up in the moment, cheering and clapping along with everyone else, your hearts beating in sync with the rhythm of the match. You had no time to reminisce about the sadness you had felt a few days ago – longing for this to be you on the field. But, as Lena reminded you, there was always next year. And it was your family down on the grass. Your family was preparing for this moment, but there was no way you were missing this because of what? You were feeling a little sad for yourself.

The stadium erupted in a chorus of cheers and chants as Barcelona clinched their fourth Champions League, three consecutive victories. The air crackled with jubilation, fans embracing strangers and loved ones alike, swept up in the euphoria of the Blaugrana victory. You and Lena joined in the celebrations, caught up in the wave of emotion that swept through the stands. Fireworks lit up the sky above the stadium, illuminating the faces of jubilant supporters. You barely noticed the tears streaming down your face until Lena tenderly wiped them away.

“Schatz?” she asked carefully, her lips brushing the shell of your ear to be heard above the noise.

“Hmm?” you sigh, looking up at her. She was awfully close; a slight readjustment and your lips would be on hers.

“Bist du bei mir?”

“Yeh,” you breathed out, leaning into her hand resting on your cheek.

“Do you want to go down to the pitch to see everyone?” she asked. You nodded slowly, still dazed by her closeness, drunk on her cinnamon scent. “C’mon,” she smiled, lacing your fingers together as she tugged you down the steps. You could see the huddle of players doing their lap of the pitch. You spotted familiar faces beaming into the crowd, waving as they found their personal supports.

You didn’t have to wait long before Clàudia spotted you, her eyes lighting up with recognition. "Oh, Déu meu, Oh, Déu meu, Oh, Déu meu," she exclaimed, practically pulling you over the barrier into a warm hug.

“Cuidadosa, Clàu,” you chuckled, reciprocating her tight embrace. Her infectious enthusiasm swept you up, and you couldn’t help but laugh. “Help a girl onto the pitch?” you teased, amused as she hoisted you over the metal barrier.

“You too, Lena.” She smiled, offering a hand to your girlfriend.

As you watched Lena gracefully navigate over the barrier, you suddenly felt a weight on your back, causing you to stagger briefly. The arms wrapped around you were pale with light freckles adorned with familiar tattoos. "Usted vino," came the cheerful voice from behind you.

“Of course I came, Oni. Not a chance in hell I would miss this," you replied, twisting awkwardly to reciprocate her hug. You both spun around playfully, laughing at Ona’s delighted squeals. "Vamos, Oni, get down so I can give you a proper hug," you chuckled, patting her forearm gently.

She embraced you tightly, conveying in that moment all the unspoken words and emotions of your time apart and the joy of the occasion. "Felicitaciones, Oni. Estoy muy orgulloso de ti," you whispered in her ear, feeling her hold tighten in response.

"Desearía que todavía estuvieras jugando con nosotros," Ona murmured wistfully, her voice thick with emotion.

"Hey, no tears," you insisted gently, pulling back slightly to meet her eyes. "I miss playing with you too. I missed my favourite defender when I’m over in Germany. But no thinking about that today. This is your moment." You shook your head with a smile, trying to lighten the mood. "Because my best friend has another Champions League title with her childhood club!" You swayed gently from side to side, celebrating quietly together.

After a few more precious moments locked in each other's arms, you gently nudged her towards her waiting family on the edge of the pitch. Watching her run off, you meandered through the players until you found Lucy.

"What number's this?" you teased, tapping her on the head playfully.

"Fuck off," she laughed, slinging an arm around your shoulder as you leaned into her.

"So, how's Munich treating you?" Lucy asked casually as if you hadn't been catching up frequently over the phone with Ona, her often joining in on the conversations.

"It’s been great; I’m really happy," you nodded to yourself – the circumstances of your arrival might not have been the best, but you certainly weren’t regretting going.

"I’m glad to hear that. Gee mentioned you seem a lot happier now," Lucy remarked.

"Keeping tabs on me, Luce?" you grinned.

“Of course, I have, kid. You’re basically my future-sister-in-law.” she teased. You froze momentarily.

"What?" you exclaimed, briefly stunned. "Have you? You better not be fucking with me, Bronze!"

“Chill, chill. Not yet, I haven’t. But I’ve got a ring, that’s for sure.” Lucy grinned mischievously, her words hanging in the air between you two. Your heart raced with the implications of her statement, and you stared at her in disbelief. You gawked at her, mouth hanging open. You blinked a few times, processing the absolute insanity that was running through your mind. You saw her bite her lip somewhat nervously. Was she anxious that you’d disapprove? You squealed, leaping onto her, joining in with the chorus of laughter.

“She’ll say yes, you know that, right?” you promised her

“That’s the plan,” Lucy joked, and you chuckled, pulling her happily into another hug.

“When?” you moved closer to her, your hand automatically coming to cover your lips.

“Probably depending on the outcome of the Euros. If she wins or we win again, then probably the first chance I get. Assuming it’s not the World Cup all over again,” she laughed a little. “If not, then when we’re on holiday afterwards.”

“Never would I thought I’d see the day,” you mocked, laughing as you brought her into another hug.

“You know … Gee mentioned something about you saving up? And that you’ve been asking Harder and Eriksson about holiday destinations? I think jewellery shops were involved,” she said casually. You blushed at her insinuation, the hue deepening as she snickered at your expression.

“Mind your business, Bronzey. When there’s something concrete to tell you, you know Ona will be the first to know, and by default, you’ll be the second.” You looked over at Lena. The way she had so seamlessly slotted into your life made your heart swell. You smiled as she laughed with Patri and slung her arm freely around Vicky.

“Oi, Lucia. Stop hogging, the pequeña.” Mapí called out, waving you both over to the gathered group of players. Lucy rolled her eyes playfully at Mapí's interruption but kept her arm around you as you walked towards the others. You couldn't shake off the mix of excitement and nervousness that Lucy's revelation had sparked in you. The group looked up as you approached, their smiles widening at seeing you and Lucy together again.

“What’s got you two all giggly?” Keira asked with a smirk, raising an eyebrow in mock curiosity. Of course, Lucy would have told Keira about her plan.

Lucy glanced at you with an impish grin before speaking, “Oh, just discussing some future plans.”

Your cheeks flushed as Lena turned to you, a puzzled expression on her face. “Future plans, huh? Care to share?”

“Nope,” you said hastily,

“All in good time, Oberdorf. For now, let’s just enjoy the moment.” Lucy grinned even wider, wiggling her eyebrows at the confused German, clearly enjoying the moment.

Slowly, you were ushered off the pitch by the officials, their gentle reminders of moving to the changing rooms and family boxes drowned out by the exuberant celebrations around you. The floodlights cast long shadows across the grass, and the deafening cheers of fans echoed through the stadium, but amidst the joy and chaos, you couldn’t help but feel a pang of sadness over the absence of a particular blonde. She was there; you had seen the familiar bounce of her ponytail through the crowd, but every time you tried to reach her, she had disappeared again, swallowed up by the sea of people.

Determined, you stood on your tiptoes, craning your neck to see above the throng, searching for that familiar face. Your heart raced with anticipation and a hint of frustration.

“Buscando a alguien?” Her familiar voice cut through the noise, and you jumped, startled.

“Christ on a bike. Give a girl a heart attack why don’t you?” you grumbled teasingly, turning to face her.

“Lo siento.” Alexia smiled down at you, her laughter bubbling up, making you press a hand to your chest dramatically to calm your racing heart. You playfully shoved her shoulder before she pulled you into a warm hug. God, you had missed these. Alexia’s hugs were safe, comforting like a mother’s embrace, a sanctuary where you could rest for a moment amidst the chaos.

“Proud of you, Ale,” you murmured into her shoulder, your voice thick with emotion.

Alexia chuckled, the sound vibrating through your entire body, grounding you.

“Thank you, pequeña,” she said softly, her accent thick and endearing. Her words were like a balm to your soul. “I’m proud of you, too, you know.”  You felt a flush of warmth at her words, a mixture of pride and affection swelling in your chest. The noise of the celebration faded into the background as you tightened your arms around her waist, feeling her solid, reassuring presence. You relaxed completely when you felt her place her cheek on your head, the gentle pressure conveying a depth of love and pride that words could never fully capture. “You’ve done good, cariño.”

The world around you continued to roar in celebration, but in that moment, it was just the two of you, wrapped in a cocoon of mutual respect and affection. You felt like you were 16 again, new to Barcelona and needed a steady presence to guide you. She hugged you warmly and promised to always be there for you. You breathed in her familiar scent, a mix of sweat, grass, and a hint of her favourite perfume, and let out a contented sigh.

“Ahora, entonces,” she said letting you go. “Lucy mencionó algo sobre las joyerías en Munich?”

[st4rbwrry]

𝒟𝑅𝐼𝐹𝒯𝐼𝒩’ 𝒩 𝒦𝐼𝒮𝒮𝐼𝒩’.

✧｡˚ eren’s over just being your best friend.

𝒲𝒜𝑅𝒩𝐼𝒩𝒢𝒮 𓇼 8.7k fem!reader, lowercase intended, girly girl reader, friends who rlly like each other, smoking, drifting, fluffy scenes, eren is super soft for reader, dirty talk, unprotected sex, car festivities, kissing, neck biting, bits of roughness, choking, ass hits, cunnilingus, daddy kink, pet names ex. ꒰ baby, pretty, luv. ꒱ , praise, sub/dom, thicq!reader, goofy loving cutesy shit, minors do not interact! comments & reblogs are appreciated.

"i'm outside."

why is that text always terrifying to receive? it's the quickest way to make your heart fall to your ass in milliseconds. you can't help but roll your eyes and suck your teeth because he's too early, or maybe you were too late. it's only nine thirty so you're confused why he's here already. dropping the puffy makeup brush in your hand, you stand up from your brightly lit royal vanity with intricate carvings in the pearl-toned wood. slipping your painted white toes into a pair of hot pink teddy bear slides to make your way out of your bedroom and towards the front door for this asshole. 

eren gets smacked in the face with your prettiness the minute you open your door, smelling like marshmallows and looking like a fucking bratz doll. your beauty stuns him every time. the six-foot-three man before you rests his weight against the wall on the outside, one arm stretched above as he leans over you with a wicked smile on his deadly gorgeous face. he's wearing a white graphic tee with pink graffiti spray painted on reading killer alongside a lavender nissan 350z. it's old merch connie was testing for his line. he also makes eren's shirts for his auto shop. 

eren's also attired in black slim jeans and beat up 550 new balances, his signature racing shoes. his silver chain on his neck dangling as he kisses your forehead, the move so slick. you've noticed he liked to touch you a lot, give little indications of affection. kissing your hand, your cheek, your face overall. he grabbed your ass a lot, and it's so excessive you have to give him a hard swat and a death glare to actually make him stop. 

"hello, eren," the way you say it has annoyance laced in it. turning away from him and walking away with that salacious sway your hips have. eren tongues his inner cheek, chuckling as he enters your home and shuts the door. he forgets how quick you walk, literally speed walking to your room since by the time he gets there you're already back on your powdered white tufted ottoman doing your makeup. riiverdance by beyoncé plays softly from the small speaker you kept on your windowsill so the music travels better. 

"damn, i can't get no kiss? you fussy with me already." eren remarks, looking below him to see the fluffy black cat brushing up against his leg, scooping her up with one hand and petting her as he takes a seat on your bed. 

"no. . aht aht! outside clothes, off the bed!" you're snapping your fingers at him as if he's your cat, eren swiftly raising his ass off your bed, blinking slow. 

"where am i supposed to sit, woman?" 

"the floor like always."

"tryna get cat hair on my shit," eren sucks his teeth, sinking down to the ground and groaning when your cat scrambles to get out of his hold, never liked being touched for long periods of time. 

"you literally decided to pick her up knowing you're wearing white. that's your fault." 

you were right but he couldn't resist holding her. that's his daughter. he's not giving you the satisfaction of being right though. manspreading, eren cocks his head to the side to watch you closely. you can see his entire reflection in your mirror, quickly glancing his way and ignoring the way he slowly licks his lips and knocks his legs in and out, unbeknownst to you, to chill his dick. 

"so fuckin' gorgeous," eren smiles, those bright white teeth making you wanna fold immediately. eren loved watching you do your makeup. eyes softening for you. he found it so mesmerizing. you surely didn't need it but it made you happy so it makes him happy. "you wearin' that white on your waterline like i like. that jus' f'me?"

you pucker your lips. "mhm, nah. i just like it. i do nothing for your gratification."

"ouch," eren holds his tatted hand to his chest, shock overcoming his features. "keep hurtin' my feelings like that 'n your ass won't have a ride tonight. or no food."

that last line alarms you more than anything. one thing you didn't play about, and he knows this especially. . . is your hunger. you honestly haven't eaten much all day. working a shift at the hospital and only having a salad on your break wasn't filling at all. you all talked in your group chat about how saturday's the perfect day to go drifting tonight and grab some chinese at your favorite restaurant in town. your check hadn't hit yet but eren being him since he likes you so damn much offered to pay for you. you declined, as usual, but he didn't give a fuck about what you said, you were coming either way. to be honest, he missed your little sweet ass. a lot. you've been working mostly overnight shifts, being a SPT wasn't for the weak. and he's been busy at the shop fixing and selling cars. your days apart, aside from texting and facetiming made him want to be in your presence. he felt complete with you. you had to know that.

"if you gonna play with me about my food then ima just head to bed right now and starve," you basically threaten him. eren hated when you don't eat enough, makes dumb jokes about how you'll 'lose those thick ass hips of yours.' the boy will make it his mission to grab you something quick. he's your food and weed dealer. also your personal chauffeur, absolutely loving when you're his passenger princess.

"don't be fuckin’ dramatic, brat. i'm playin'. you know i got you," he stands back to his feet to come by you, pressing his midsection to your backside, where you can also feel the outline of his dick, trying your best to ignore the way it makes your face heat up. teasingly, he starts sliding his warm hands over your shoulders and down to your waist. cautiously, you eye him, having a hot wave of panic hit you when he begins tickling your left side. your most sensitive side, mind you. you screech and twist your body into a curling position trying to escape his attack. 

"eren! get the fuck off me, bro!" he's laughing hard at your attempt to twist and yank away from his grasp, screeching and biting his arm which he flinches from and moves away. 

“oww, fuckin’ gremlin,” he hisses dramatically, as if you’d stabbed him. “next time smile when you see me at that fuckin' door. gimme a 'hey, daddy' with it, too. it'll make my dick jump."

"your dick jumps for me enough."

eren’s eyes meets yours in the reflection of your vanity mirror. he shrugs nonchalantly, a devilish grin spreading across his face.

“well,” he begins, dragging the word out as he takes a step closer to you again. “you wanna see it?” 

you roll your eyes, his voice dropping lower, becoming more intense as he continues. “know you wanna see it again.” 

“says who?” you raise your brow, testing him. 

by again, he means accidentally when he was showering at your place and forgot to grab his boxers before he went inside your bathroom, thinking you were sleep when you were in fact up reading on your phone. wanting to laugh at the memory of him turning red in the face and trying his best to shield his dick with his hands. making a snide comment about how badly you wanted to stare at it. 

“you heard me,” he states simply, his gaze never leaving yours in the mirror. he's leaning directly over you, forehead nearly touching yours. his presence is overwhelming, filling the small room with his raw masculinity. this is a regular thing by the way. his constant teasing. waiting for you to let up. 

“okay, daddy,” you grin mischievously.

“mhm,” he kisses his teeth, and at the same moment his phone vibrates in his pocket. eren fishes for it, checking a text from connie. 

"connie’s outside, you done?” 

“you rushing me now? i don’t like this rennie tonight,” you tsk, shaking your finger like a disappointment mother. standing to your feet, you brush out the curls in your head by running your fingertips through them. 

you do look so pretty tonight. wearing an oversized pink greenbay packers jersey with a flowy white mini skirt, eren watching as you enter your walk in closet to fish for some white socks to scrunch at your ankle, and the same pair of sneakers he currently wore. my little twin. 

“sorry, i’ll be on my best behavior.” 

you smile, standing on your tiptoes and pinching his cheek, eren liking the view a bit too much, trying to fight the urge to grab your hips and pull you close. “such a good boy. now, let’s go!” 

“wait, i want a kiss, wife,” eren smiled, trying to lean in before you pull away and shove your hand in his face. 

“leave me alone, pervert!” 

connie’s goal tonight was to show off the enhancements he added to his neon green scion frs, the car humming outside of your house when you go to say hello to him. he mentions that he’s going to swing by to pick up his girlfriend before he meets the two of you there. she didn’t live too far so he was able to make it before you two did, eren always having to make a mental note not to drive like a dickhead when you’re in the car. knowing your nerves are bad. they’ve gotten slightly better though since you’re with him all the time. 

you loved drift meet up’s because it was a free car show to see all the cool ass cars, most of the models popular in japan. men and women in groups drinking and bumping music as they interact. it’s illegal as hell where you live but sometimes everyone’s able to get away with it if they don’t act too much like jackasses. this spot was mostly secluded from open roads or police. 

eren walks alongside you, his arm loosely draped around your shoulders as you both make your way  to the forefront where cars currently span in action. his car wasn’t parked too far, planning on performing a show himself in a little. the adrenaline pumping through the crowd as drivers send their vehicles skidding around corners and spinning donuts in the dirt your favorite, and his. connie arrives not too long after, eren going up to talk to him before you’re locked in, excited for him. 

“i need to teach you how to drift one of these days. i gotta see your pretty ass behind a nissan 240sx or sum,” he says, pulling you closer into his side so you can hear him over the noise. 

“that’s specific,” you laugh, looking up at him while chewing your gum, rocking with him. 

eren grins down at you, his hand tightening slightly around your shoulder as he pulls you closer to him. “what can i say? i have a type.” 

“you sure do,” your voice trails off, focused on connie’s loud car screeching and swinging before the crowd around you. cheers vibrating your ears like a concert. the feeling like a movie. you don’t notice that eren keeps his eyes on you the whole time, admiring you as you jump, clap, and scream from excitement. pulling your phone out to record your friend. 

removing yourself from his arm, you notice the cars currently in the circle beginning to depart and make way for others. “con’s!”

eren shakes his head as he watches you bolt towards connie’s car, jumping up and down like a kid, bending low to give him a high five. “that was fucking awesome!” 

“yeah, fuck with me!” he continues to slap his palm with yours. you look over to his girlfriend in the passenger seat, reaching over to twinkle fingers. 

“hey girly!” luna smiles, tucking her long dark hair behind her ear since it blew everywhere from the wind. 

“hiii!” you giggle. 

“shit was good, i taught you well,” eren approaches, their heavy hands interacting, shaking before snapping their fingers. 

“yea, whatever. you always want full credit, asshole,” connie sucks his teeth. 

“oh my god, we should totally drift each other!” luna suggests. connie whips his head in her direction. 

“wha—who said you driving my car?” connie blinks, flabbergasted. 

luna goes to hit his arm playfully. “cabrona, i meant she can get in the car with eren and yall do yall lil’ thingy thing.” 

“oooo, yayyy!” you approve instantly, clapping your hands together and turning to eren with puppy eyes. “oh, please?! i wanna shotgun!” 

“be my guest, sweetheart. but don’t try to hang your head out the window again like a damn dog, or else,” his voice drops low, a warning lacing his words as he gives you a knowing look.

“mhm, i make no promises,” you wink, racing towards his car. 

connie laughs at eren’s strained face, his friend knowing deep down he loved it. connie knew a lot you didn’t know. like the fact that eren’s madly in love with you, and has been ever since freshman year of high school. it’s not secret to anyone, really.  as eren approaches his parked car you bounced impatiently beside, he opens the passenger door for you, gesturing for you to climb in before walking over to the driver's seat. the interior of his black r34 gtr is pristine, everything from the leather seats to the carbon fiber accents shining under the sunlight. you loved when he picked you up just to take you for a ride. he works on cars practically all day given he owns an auto shop, detailing and adding enhancements being his daily thing.

he’s getting his hands dirty and his mind fried from mechanical work. he customized this car to make it his own, his name written in japanese on the right corner of front window, a front spoiler splitter, apexi gt specthe which makes his exhaust sound like fucking gunshots, which terrifies you. on top of detailing the body of the car with giant dragons painted silver on either side of the vehicle. standing out to the crowd uniquely. 

eren makes his way inside of the vehicle, big hands gripping the steering wheel as he adjusts his legs in his seat, your eyes locking there momentarily before he inserts his key into the ignition, firing up the extremely loud engine. an anxious smile shows on your face once you see everyone yelling over the power of his car, having been in it a million times, you still hated the sound, triggering your sensory overload. but, you loved the thrill. swallowing, you turn to him, balling up his shirt on his hip to grab his attention. 

“promise me you’ll be safe,” you look up at him, worried.

a soft smile tugs at his lips as he sees the concern in your eyes. he reaches out, brushing a stray curl of hair from your face with his thumb. “don't worry, princess. i'll take care of both you and my baby here.” 

“i’m trusting you,” you whisper, biting your lip. “don’t hit anybody, i don’t need you going to jail. and please don’t hit connie, because he will kill you if you fuck up his car.” 

eren smirks, his hand dropping from your face to gently cradle the back of your neck. his grip is firm yet tender. “now why’d i risk traumatizing my girl like that?” 

you suck your teeth and pull away from him, crossing your arms. he only sets his hand on your thigh now, and you let him. “aren’t you going to start driving?” 

eren laughs heartily, his hand tightening around your thigh as he does. he revs the engine, feeling the power beneath them rumble in anticipation. his eyes flash dangerously in the dim light of the cars. “promise me something, too?” 

“what?”

“we’ll finish playing mommy and daddy when we get home?” he grins. 

“oh please, you know you can’t handle me,” you tease. such a bad habit you two have. joking too damn much. but by this point, from his end especially, you’re aware none of it is a joke. 

eren raised a brow, feeling threatened. “oh, i can’t?” 

“nope. and you’re too scared to admit it,” you taunt, fluttering a kiss in his direction. 

“mhm,” eren kisses his teeth, he gives a curt nod, as if making a mental note. “ima hold you to that.” 

“drive the damn car, eren.” 

ignoring the warmth in your chest from his flirting, he finally shifts the car into gear. with a roar of the engine, he accelerates onto the street, leaving behind a cloud of smoke. malice at the palace by BONES is bumping through the stereo system as eren expertly maneuvers his car around the road, each turn and drift executed with precision. the sound of the engine reverberating through the car sends a rush of adrenaline through him. you hated to admit how fucking good he looked right now, your hand gripping onto his bicep as you giggle each time he executes a perfect drift, tires screeching, watching connie’s car across from his spin around each other. part of him hopes to impress you. and clearly he has by the huge smile on your face. you’re like a kid in a candy shop, eyes lit up. 

“i’m doing it!” you yell, eren watching as you climb up on your seat, skirt rising from the wind blowing, your ass hanging out making his eyes go wide. 

“꒰♡꒱, sit your ass down.”

“woo!” it’s too late, now you’re banging the palm of your hand on the outside of the door, staring at others who hollered back at you, your curls flying in the wind. the people screaming and cheering louder the more you raised your upper body outside of the window, being sure to secure yourself. eren’s hand instinctively clutch onto your ankle. 

“goddamit,” he groans, but couldn’t help the feeling in his heart from your pure laughter. you’re enjoying yourself, that makes him happy. but your safety is important. given that, he slows down just enough so that it feels safe for you not to jolt and fall out of the car. despite your reckless act, he couldn’t help but marvel at how fearless you truly are.

connie’s car slides vertically next to eren’s, taking your chance to reach out and graze your fingers with luna’s as she leans her body outside of the window like you do, the two of you screaming like fans of your favorite superstar. the adrenaline pumping through your veins is exhilarating. 

eren’s hitting on the brakes, causing the tires to yell and the car to skid sideways. with a swift move of his foot on the gas pedal, eren launches his car into a perfect 360-degree spin. the car gracefully arcs around its axis before smoothly coming back onto its original trajectory, all done. the world outside blurs into a whirlwind of colors and shapes as you scream into the wind, lowering your body to take your seat in your original position. 

“that was sooo fun!” the sound you make is the cutest, giggling and bouncing your legs, full of energy now. he adores the glint in your eyes, but he also couldn’t hide the upset on his face. 

“i’m sure. next time, listen to me when i say don’t hang your body halfway out the fucking car. you’ve never done that before, what if you flew out?” the sudden change in his tone takes you aback. 

“i can take care of myself,” you retort, your defiant words making him clench his jaw. 

“not saying you can’t. i’m telling you don’t be so fuckin’ reckless,” his hand moves from the steering wheel to smooth down his face, keeping himself calm, despite the current situation being anything but serene. he doesn’t mean to ruin your mood. surely didn’t want to cause an argument. he just needed you to understand where he was coming from. “don’t die trying to show off.” 

“don’t die trying to protect me.” 

“꒰♡꒱ . . cut that big girl shit, seriously.” 

“aren’t we meeting our friends to get food? let’s go.” 

connie did mention they’d be grabbing food right after, eren clenching his jaw and pulling his attention away from you. he tries not to keep you at these events for too long, sometimes things get rowdy and guns are drawn and he wouldn’t allow either of you to be around that. shifting his car back into drive, he pulls away from the scene to trail behind connie. you hated the current silence of the car, picking up your phone to distract yourself from any conversation. as you pull up next to your group, onyankopon popping up a minute after, eren kills the engine and opens his door with ease. he rounds the car, opening the door for you. you give a quiet ‘thanks’ before speed walking away to luna. eren sighs deeply, sucking his teeth and locking his car, pulling a puff bar from his pocket and leaning against his vehicle to calm himself for a minute. 

“you okay? you look sad?” luna frowns as she holds your hand, ready to cross the street to enter the chinese restaurant. 

you make an awkward expression, not really wanting to make it a big deal. “nothing, i’m just hungry! also kind of have a headache from the whiplash.” 

glancing beside you, you see eren approaching onyankopon, shoving his keys into his pocket while simultaneously colliding their hands for a handshake, hearing the small ‘yo, wassup’ from the pair before you turn your head away, luna pulling you along with her. the five of you find a booth inside of the almost empty restaurant given its close to closing, being one o’clock in the morning and all. you take the time to catch up with luna since she’s been busy with esthetician classes and try your best to avoid eren . . even if he’s sitting directly next to you. this act can only go for so long before the two of you catch glances repeatedly, still making little interactions with the group together if you had to. you didn’t want everyone knowing that you two had a small fight. was it really a fight? you were fine, at least that’s what you liked to tell yourself. 

time passes and onyankopon is the first to leave, mentioning he has to get up early for work and saying his goodbyes. that leaves luna and connie to cuddle up next to one another in the booth, your eyes studying the way his arm is draped around her shoulder while he listens intently on everything she says, bopping her nose with his finger as she giggles cutely. you smile faintly, looking down at the food you’re playing with at this point with your chopsticks. 

eren glances at you as he finishes his plate, a finger pressed to his temple as he leans his elbow on the table. you feel his glare, turning his way to see what he wanted. his eyes holding a certain intensity that only you seem to understand. “come take a ride with me.” 

you continue to fiddle with your chopsticks, swallowing air. “where are we going?” 

“i need to talk to you about something.” 

you’ve dreaded this. unsure of what was going to come from him when you two were alone. you’re not sure if he’s still mad about earlier, his reaction when luna brought up your car moment laced with irritation, like he wanted nothing to do with it. honestly, there was nothing more to talk about. he knows you don’t like confrontation, so you hoped he wouldn’t make an entire conversation about why he feels the way he does. a simple apology should’ve sufficed. the anxiety is pumping through you now, wanting to groan from his seriousness. one thing you’ve learned about eren was that he was big on communication. if something bothered him or he felt like certain things needed to be talked about, he’d take that chance to fix it. when he’s serious about something, it gave you goosebumps. 

his gaze lingers on yours, the flickering candlelight on the table casting an enchanting glow on his features. you swallow, nodding. “okay.” 

“we’re gonna go,” you grab the couples attention across the booth, connie and luna sitting up the moment you and eren stand. 

“awe, okay boo! it was nice seeing y’all,” luna waves to both of you. eren’s patting his pocket for his keys, pulling out his wallet to set cash on the table for the both of you. 

eren smiles. “you too, love. i’ll see you tomorrow, con.” 

“bet, see you. y’all be safe.” 

the car shifts into gear and pulls out onto the quiet street, the sound of heavy wind encasing the vehicle the only thing you could hear, blurring out the world. eren drove possibly fifteen minutes to a spot only the two of you go to. it’s secluded, parked under a giant tree in a grass field high on a hill that overlooked the city night. it’s surely a romantic destination. the two of you go here whenever you need to rant about life or just escape. it’s been your spot since high school. the slow melody of rnb fills the interior, creating an intimate atmosphere. the two of you sit for a moment, eren fishing for his puff bar to take a few passes before you finally say something. 

“can i?” you ask, voice an almost hushed whisper. gesturing towards the object. 

“yeah,” he’s handing it your way, clearing his throat before leaning back into his seat, smoothing both hands down his thighs before adjusting comfortably, closing his eyes momentarily. 

eren takes a deep breath, running his fingers through his hair. “lemme start by saying i’m not mad at you.” 

you blink, shifting your body so all of your attention is on him so he feels important. you tend to stare off into nothingness during these moments. 

“yes, are you stubborn as fuck and it pisses me off at times? absolutely. you know when it comes to you, shit like that makes me anxious. i have that urge to protect you, and it’s always been like that. so don’t think i’m being immature by wanting to care for your safety. i know you’re grown, and you carry yourself well. but sometimes i need for you to just listen when i get gut feelings about shit.” 

“i know, and i apologize,” you reply almost instantly, the thought being on your mind the entire dinner, but unable to let the words pass. “i do appreciate how you care for me. i was just having fun and didn’t want my mood to be ruined. it was dangerous, anything could’ve happened.” 

despite his uncertainty, there's no denying the sincerity in his gaze; a raw vulnerability that contrasts sharply against his usual confident demeanor. struggling to say what’s really on his mind at the moment. “you still have that bad habit of never wanting to be corrected.” 

“yeah,” you lower your head to your thighs, fiddling with the fabric of your skirt. “still working on it. i tend to be too aggressive when i want to be right.” 

“i’m glad you understand. but, that’s not what i wanted to talk to you about.” 

you look up. “what is it? did something happen?” 

eren takes another deep breath, steeling himself for what he's about to reveal. his gaze never leaving yours as he prepares to lay his heart bare. “look . . i’m g’na be straightforward with you. i don’t need you to take this as something that has to be figured out immediately. i’ll give you the time and space you need to think on it if you’re feeling the opposite. but. .”

his cheeks flush slightly under your scrutinizing stare. it’s clear that whatever he's about to say is far from easy for him. he’s scaring you. “me and you, we been close since kids. i have love for you for life, but i need you to know that it’s been hard just being your friend. my emotions are consuming me, and being around you all the time is only making it more difficult. i see myself being with you, being in love with you. . for a long time now.” 

the confession hangs heavy in the air between you both; raw and vulnerable, yet undeniably true. his heart pounds loudly in his chest as he waits for your reaction, bracing himself for either acceptance or rejection. either way, he’d stand by what he felt. and if you didn’t feel the same, it would hurt, but he would respect your boundaries. you’re unsure why you’re not . . surprised? he’s always been extremely affectionate with you, much more than a best friend should be. wasn’t necessarily fond of seeing you with other men or hearing about who you slept with. you told each other everything. had sleepovers. shared beds, and at times when you fell asleep before him, he’d brush a finger along your cheek and admired your beauty. 

"my dream is to get you that big ass loft you want with the tall glass windows that overlook the city. decorate it how you want, be my pretty fuckin housewife that gets to stay home and do whatever you want. shit, start your own business. i'll pay for it all. i'll take care of you. i want you to myself, always. never wanna leave you. wanna get your name tatted on me. kiss you all day. cuddle, watch your favorite movies and shitty supernatural tv shows. run you bubble baths 'n fuck you real good every time i come home. buy you that wolf gray kia k5 with pink interior you've been wantin'. send you on vacations. buy you all the sanrio plushies in the fuckin' world. want you to be mine, ꒰♡꒱."

" eren. . . "

"i'll even learn how to cook for you, princess. 'n you know i'm bad as fuck at that shit," eren chuckles, raking his fingers through your hair. you laugh with him, tears in your eyes. "but i'll learn for you so i can always make you some authentic udon ramen or birria tacos, all that good shit you love. cause you're my girl 'n you deserve it all."

eren's hands move to rest on your hips, pulling you closer to him. his fingers trace small circles on your skin, sending shivers down your spine. his touch is gentle yet possessive. a tangible manifestation of the love he's been harboring for you. each stroke of his fingertips against your body feels like an exploration, a journey into the depths of your being that only he has access to.

“talk to me,” he bites his lip, lips nearly brushing your own, unable to help the pure attraction towards you. it’s stronger than ever right now. 

“i feel the same way,” you lean in, moaning from his touch, his hands on you all the time, though somehow now they make you weaker. “i just didn’t want to ruin our friendship.”

eren’s breath hitches, a combination of shock and relief consuming him. “why the fuck would you think that?” 

your shoulders shrug shyly. “i don’t know,” your voice drags quietly. “sometimes shit like that doesn’t work for everybody. and we have a great friendship. i didn’t want us being together to fuck up the vibe.” 

“we not everyone,” he states, brushing a curl from your pretty face. “and we act like we date anyways. wouldn’t be no different.”

you recepriocate the act, brushing a few brown strands of hair that fell in front of his face, locking eyes before your lips press against his in feverish kiss. his tongue parts your lips, exploring the warm cavern of your mouth with a passionate intensity. his hands roam freely over your body now, one tracing delicate patterns on your lower back while the other slips beneath your shirt to feel the warmth of your skin underneath. every touch is filled with desire and longing, a testament to the depth of his feelings for you. the heat in your face blows higher, as if the ache to kiss him was a distant dream. to finally taste him was something you hadn’t known you needed. both of your hearts are pounding in your chests, every beat echoing the intensity of your feelings for each other. 

“you have no idea,” he whispers huskily, pecking your lips. you moan, body melting into his touch. you could slip through his fingers like puddy, this center console blocking you. “how much i want you.” 

“show me then.” 

eren’s eyes darken with desire. his hands slide down to grip your ass, climbing over the console to reach for the recliner on your seat, your flushed face heating up from the close proximity, his hair brush along the apples of your cheek, his smell intoxicating. you giggle when he goes to remove the headrest of the chair, banging his hand into the seat so it’s completely flat and you’re resting on your back. eren hovers completely over you, bringing his body to the passenger side, squeaking when you feel his hardness brush against your clit, a clear indication of just how much he wants you. taking your lip between his teeth, he gives it a playful nip before trailing hot kisses down your neck, going to capture your lips in another hot kiss, rolling his hips into yours making you gasp. you trail your hands underneath his black shirt, hands sliding up his broad backside.

“i need you,” you whimper, knees disconnecting to spread yourself for him, scooting higher up the seat. your desperation makes his control slip further. 

“fuck,” he murmurs, voice thick with desire, tracing along the curve of your waist before dipping lower to tease at the hemline of your skirt. “you’re making it hard for me to keep my shit together.” 

“lick me up,” you whimper, pushing your hips down so your core presses against the bulge in his jeans, eren keeping down the moan in his throat, studying you. your thumbs slip into the band of your skirt, trying to indicate that you wanted them off. “please, m’dripping.”

“fuck,” he whispers again, this newfound sense of lust you had enrapturing him. “anything for you, baby.” 

his hands slip beneath your skirt to explore the softness of your thighs, smoothing over your ass as you raise your hips so it’s easier for him to pull off your skirt, his mouth watering at the bare sight of you wearing no panties. you’d slipped off your sneakers, the balls of your feet digging into his shoulder blades as he pushes you further up the chair for both of your comfortability, craning his neck between the plush of your heated thighs. he breathes in your scent, moaning into a kiss he places on your inner thigh. 

“c’mon—ah!” your breath is taken from you for your impatience, eren’s mouth circling around your clit for a quick feel before he’s lowering his tongue to taste all of you. locking his eyes with yours as you thread your fingers through his hair to push away, deciding to remove the hair tie from around your wrist to tie his hair onto the back of his head. 

the taste of you on his lips drives him wild, craving this for years on end. eren groans from the sweet taste you leave on his fat tongue, his breath fanning over your sensitive flesh sending jolts of pleasure coursing through your body. eren growls in approval at your submission, his fingers digging into your hips as he pulls you closer to his mouth, swallowing down your clit, sucking on your pussy to hear you make those pretty noises he’s only heard once in his life. accidentally, of course. maybe catching you fucking yourself coming up the stairs without your knowledge, wanting to surprise you with food while the two of you studied for finals. he’s always kept that to himself, knowing you’d be extremely embarrassed by it. of course, he didn’t know it’s because you couldn’t stop thinking about what he wore in p.e; a black deftones muscle tank he cut as a crop top with gray sweatpants, his hair pulled into a manbun with his skin glistening in sweat from the insane weather out. dark ink around his skin making your mind run rapid. 

he releases his mouth momentarily, popping off your clit lewdly to murmur, “you are fuckin’ drippin’.” 

your back arches into his embrace, craning your neck as you rock against his face, eren grinning wickedly at your muffled sound, his tongue delving deeper into your folds. he laps at your entrance, thriving for every drop. his hands move to spread your legs wider apart, giving him better access to feast on your needy cunt. you hum in ecstasy, the sensation from the metal ball of his tongue piercing flicking your clit, using it to tease and torment you. his dark eyes watching you like prey, squirming and gasping from every suck. 

“fuck, baby,” he moans. “you’re so sensitive.” 

his hands move to cradle your ass cheeks as he pushes your ass up to fuck his face better, pussy glistening under the moonlight. his tongue continues it’s relentless assault, curling and connecting his tongue with your aching cunt feverishly while suctioning his lips around your swollen clit. your hands stretch to grip onto the door handle, moaning when his hand goes to smack the back of your thigh. eren growls at your helpless moans, his tongue delving deeper into your slick folds, slithering inside of you to prep you. his hands pinning your legs wide allows him unrestricted access to your throbbing cunt.

“wet n’ pretty ass pussy, baby. so, so pretty. jus’ like you, right?” he groans against you, increasing the pressure on his tongue, thrusting it in and out of you rhythmically. his free hand moves to play with your clit, rolling the sensitive nub under his thumb as he devours your pussy. 

without waiting for a response, he resumes his ministrations, his tongue plunging back into your dripping cunny while one hand continues to toy with your clit. his actions intensify as he listens to your desperate whimpers. his tongue laps at your slit greedily, drinking down every drop of your sweetness, thumb working overtime on your clit, rubbing up and down mercilessly.

“stick your fingers in me,” you whine, the brokenness in your tone only making his dick harder. he’d rather shove his dick in you, but he wouldn’t deny what you pleaded for. 

eren chuckles darkly at your plea, and within a second, his ring and index fingers are slipping inside of you, eren curling them upwards, searching for that sweet spot deep within your pussy.

“like this?” he sputters against your clit, your juices encapsulating him. your inner thighs tremble from the switch up, biting your lip and nodding. “fuck you up real good? ‘till you cream on me?” 

“y-yesss, f-fuck,” your sobs overtake you, his tongue continuing it’s relentless assault on your sensitive bud, licking and sucking it into oblivion. eren hums in agreement, his fingers pumping in and out of your soaked cunt. he watches his fingers pump harder into your quivering cunt with furrowed brows, mumbling expletives to himself in fascination, your cunny squelching and sinking them in each time they threatened to pull out. 

“ima sink my dick in your shit, fuck. i’m too fucking hard for you,” he groans against your clit, pace quickening, the combination of his fingers fucking into you while his tongue circles around your clit pushing you closer to the edge.

“keep fucking me, baby. fuckin’ love your tongue.” 

eren loves your cries so much it’s hurting his dick bad, his fingers pumping harder into your twitching cunt, begging for you to cum. you’re drenching his fingers. he removes them when he notices your hand is cupping underneath his jaw, pulling his face in deeper and swaying your hips, the balled up expression on your face reading all he needed to know. you stretch your legs high, clamping your thighs shut and wrapping your arms underneath the curve of your knees to angle them towards your chest. eren licks his lips before sinking his tongue deep into you, thrusting his tongue like he’d use his dick.  

making a noise of approval, you grip onto his hair while maintaining your position, yanking his head back and forth, screaming as his face clashes with your pussy, tongue fucking you open until you finally cum. your tummy caves in, lifting your head to press into your knees as you catch your breath, streaming out praises of ‘yes, yes yes, baby,’ as he continues to fuck you on his tongue, uncaring of you drenching his nose and chin. 

while you take time to recuperate, eren’s leaning his head up to clean his face with the back of his hand, licking off the remainder as he reaches down to unbutton his jeans, slipping them down to his thighs and giving his dick a few slow strokes, the sight of it, thick and long, glistening with precum is enough to make anyone drool. eren holds onto it teasingly, keeping it just out of reach as he watches your reaction. “knew you wanted to see it again.” 

you cover your face. “shut up.”

with a lustful gleam in his eyes, he lines the throbbing tip against your wet slit, sliding it up and down to gather your arousal before he’s grabbing the back of your neck to look into your eyes, heavy body hovering over yours, trying his best not to lean all of his weight onto you. granted, that’s exactly what you wanted, to be suffocated under him. feel weak, submissive. 

“tell me you’re okay.” 

you nod, eyes slowly closing, unable to keep focus. “yes, m’okay. it’s okay.” 

the feeling of being sheathed within your tight pussy makes him shudder, removing his hand from your neck to balance his body by gripping onto either side of the leather seat after locking your legs flat. you reach for the recliner to level the seat up a little more, eren kissing your forehead. you drag your body lower so it’s easier for him to move, shivering from the full feeling he gives you, and that’s only half of him. 

“fuck,” he gasps, grinding into you slowly so you’ll adjust. you swivel your hips, teeth biting into your lip as you stare at the sharp cut of his jawline, emerald eyes clamped shut. “that’s it.” 

with each heavy thrust, eren can’t help the animalistic groans emitting from him, the deep baritone of his voice making your clit pulsate harder as he fucks himself deeper into you. your skin clapping as he pounds into you hard, hitting your spot and making you cry for him. he wheezes within the crevice of your neck, both of your moans colliding within the small enclosure, vibrating over the music flowing from his speakers. he’s fucking you faster with each thrust.

“s’so good, f-fuck,” the wind gets taken from you with every harsh pound, grunting beneath him and taking it all. he felt so fucking good, you couldn’t believe you waited this long just to let him fuck you. too many opportunities missed. for good and wrongs reasons though. 

“that’s it, you’re such a good girl,” his mouth gives you a chaste, sloppy kiss to your pouty lips. everything he does makes you want to cum. heavier and stronger than the last. he’s a fucking trip. 

“i’m your good girl?” your bottom lip is pulled into your mouth, teeth baring as you smile drunkenly. 

“ ‘course you are,” he kisses you again, prolonging it this time, your body slipping lower giving him the chance to fuck you even deeper, stretching you open and stuffing you full. you can feel him all in your tummy, your brows furrowed. “better than that. you’re my baby.” 

“i’m your baby?” the drag out of a whiny tone as you grip onto his chin to keep his eyes on yours has the man before you crumbling. 

eren practically whines from the way you speak to him, molding your frame into his seat from the strength he fucked you with, listening to your pussy cry for him. “you’re my baby.” 

“my pussy loves you,” you move with him, your tight cunt squeezing him, feeling that warmth build up in your stomach. 

“it does, huh. tell me how much, love.” 

“loves it so fucking much, daddy.” 

“that’s what i wanted to hear,” he hisses, groaning and fucking you faster, straightening his legs so he gets a get angle, hitting into you with all his weight. “oh god, baby. you feel so fuckin’ good.” 

“yeah, daddy?” you whimper, biting your lip. 

“yes, babydoll,” eren groans in agreement, cursing to himself as he slips his dick out, the two of you gasping from the disconnect, eren lifting himself from you. “bend over.”

you use the seat to turn yourself around, hiking yourself further up to give his big body space to settle behind you. you keep your thighs pressed together, shifting your ass back against him and arching your back low. you jump when he lands a heavy swat to your ass, hissing as his fingertips grip your flesh and bounce your ass back, mesmerized by how it moves. he draws his hips back, flexing his dick to make it jump into the right position to easily slide within your wet opening, the angle allowing him to hit deeper within your pussy than before. 

“unh, sshit,” eren moans, hands grabbing either side of your hips and tugs you back, your ass clapping amongst his toned abdomen. your forehead is connected with the seat, mouth agape as you feel the swell of him slip in and out of you, eyes scrolling to the back of your skull. 

“sshit, you’re so deep, ah!” 

his thrusts become more forceful, hitting even deeper within your pussy. with every stroke, he feels himself getting closer to release. eren growls, his canines grazing your skin as he leans in to bite your neck, your filthy whine only serving to heighten his arousal. he continues to thrust hard into you, each movement sending you both closer to breakage. 

“g’na cum, baby,” eren whimpers, rolling his waist into you, that pressure in his lower abdomen threatening to break. 

“noo, don’t cum yet,” you whine, shaking your head pleadingly. “n-not there yet.” 

“i won’t. won’t cum yet, baby,” he hisses in response. “wanna wait for daddy? so we can cum together?” 

“mmnh, wanna cum with you, baby,” your head nods drunkenly, sightly blurry. your body aches from the lack of space in the car, but it felt so good to be overpowered by him. drilling his dick into you harder. 

“take it f’me, ꒰♡꒱.” 

“i’m taking it, baby. for you.” 

“moan f’me,” his lips get closer to your ear, eren’s eyes squeezing tight, jaw wide as he fucks your pussy open. 

“m-moaning for you, babyy-ah!”

“fuck it back f’me, act like you wanna get fucked,” eren growls in pleasure, his thrusts continuing despite having already climaxed.

“i’ll fuck it for you, fuck it for you,” you’re straight up sobbing now, rolling your ass back to meet his rough strokes, dripping down your inner thighs. you’d never been fucked this good before in your life. could have possibly been the chemistry, or the longing for him. “ooo-mnmg, i feel it.” 

eren smirks, his hands moving to encircle your throat. his grip tightens slightly, cutting off your air supply, his clothed chest on your back and the coldness from his silver chain tickling your flesh. “eren, ima cum again. k-keep it there.” 

your body shudders beneath him, waves of pleasure crashing as you feel your orgasm breaks through you, pussy clenching tightly around his cock and whimpering vehemently in his face, sobbing from your inability to withhold your orgasm as well as the overwhelming way he fucked you. 

“ren,” you weep, reaching your hand behind yourself to try to push his hips away. but he doesn’t budge. eren grips your wrist to bend it still behind your back, slowing his movements the last motive. 

“you came without me, baby. bad girl,” he tightens his grip on your wrist, giving an open mouthed kissed over the side of your face. 

a small cry fell from your lips. "s-sorry. fuck, rennie . . please.”

"please, what?” he grits his teeth, the shortest hairs in front sticking to his forehead while the others threaten to fall loose from the small bun on the back of his head. the silver bracelets on his wrist clanking as he yanks you back to meet his aggressive thrusts. 

"please, eren—s-slow. i’m sensitive.” 

"that's not my name. what's my fuckin’ my name, ꒰♡꒱?" he grunts dominantly, pressing a harsh kiss to your temple, knowing what you need. 

"s-shit—daddy, please!” 

despite your pleas, he keeps fucking you mercilessly, his cock sliding in and out of your wet pussy with ease. the sensation of being buried within you is too intoxicating for him to stop.

“jus’ a little more, baby. please take it a lil more,” his hand lands heavily on your ass, slowing his thrusts a bit for your sake and to feel your pussy constrict and beg to swallow him deeper as he shifts his hips slightly back, the tip of his dick kissing your entrance before he’s shoving it back in. circling his hips, ass flexing and becoming apart of you, pushing him towards another climax. 

“ooo, you fuckin’ me so good.” 

“ ‘cause it’s you, ‘cause i love you.” 

with a final powerful thrust, eren buries himself deep inside you. his cock twitches within your pussy, reaching in between to pull his dick out just in time, spurting his cum directly on your backside. your scream is deafening, covering your mouth and grinding your ass back as you cum again, unsure how that’s fucking possible. your body betrayed you, acting as if you’ve never been fucked in your whole life. but, truth be told, you’ve never gotten fucked that deep, or that good. 

“fuck!” eren’s tone is deep, stroking his dick while his other hand held your ass, thrusting into his hand to draw out every ounce of cum you wanted out of him. eren nearly collapses onto you, panting heavily as he recovers from his orgasm, slowly softening but knowing he can go another round. maybe at your house this time.

he kisses your neck softly. “are you okay, love?”

you nod, heaving, mouth dry. trying to regain your vision. “y-yeah. m’good.”

before rolling off of you, he gives you another kiss before he’s climbing back into the drivers seat to pull his pants back up, fishing for a wipe inside of his center console. 

you’re laying on your stomach now, cheek resting on your arms as you catch your breath, eren smiling down at you, kissing your spine as he wipes up his mess. “so pretty, baby.” 

that makes you weaker than anything he’d just done to you, hiding your face within your arms, still looking at his gorgeous face. he loves you so much, it’s always been clear. you hate how long it’s taken you to realize that. 

“i don’t have to think on it,” you suddenly say, eren staring intensely. your lips curve into a smile. “i know i love you too. for a while now.” 

the sparkle in his eyes makes your heart absolutely melt. “for real?”

you nod. “yeah. my dream is to get you that big ass loft you want with the tall glass windows that overlook the city. decorate it how you want, be my pretty fuckin housewif—”

“shut. the. fuck. up,” eren sounds out, smushing your lips together so you wouldn’t see the redness in his face. of course you’d mock him. you giggle into his mouth, squeaking when he goes to tickle your hip, eren laughing when you turn to hit his arm. 

“seriously, eren, i hate that shit!” 

“blah, blah, blah. love you too.”

© 𝒮𝒯𝟦𝑅𝐵𝒲𝑅𝑅𝒴! all rights reserved. please do not repost, steal, or modify my work simply because it is mine. stealing isn't cute. i'll ruin your life ♡

[idkwhatever580]

Gina?

Masterlist

Pairings: Regina George x reader

Prompt: reader helps Regina when her life falls apart

Warnings: self hate, swearing,

A/N: I had a request to do this and I did it the other way around so here is a different version. I stuggled with the body part since I kind of was going on and on and it led to something else but I hope you like it!

Y/n’s pov

I just got to my girlfriend’s house. Her mom called me and said she’s been on the treadmill for two hours.

Ms. George called around four and she said that she left school early and wouldn’t get off, so I immediately told her that I was coming over.

I had just gotten out of school too.

So I run into the house and say a quick

“Hey Ms. George!”

And I ran to their workout room.

The door is locked so I knock really hard so she can hear me. She thinks I’m her mom so she yells

“Mom I told you I need to lose three pounds!!!”

“Gina baby! It’s me! Y/n! Can you please let me in?

“No! You need to go! I need to lose more weight!”

I sigh when I realize she’s not getting off that machine until I drag her off. So I quickly find two Bobby pins and pick the lock. Thank god for coach carr.

He might not have taught me a lot of things. Except for that if you have sex you’ll get chlamydia and die. (False) but he once had to pick the lock to get back into the classroom when he accidentally got us all locked out.

So I open the door and find her eating a gross looking bar of sorts.

I turn off the treadmill and say

“Gina. Please. This isn’t healthy.”

She is panting and sweating and she finally kind of snaps out of it.

She is like really fucking tired now so I help her to the bathroom to clean off.

“What kind of bar is that Gina?”

She shrugs while washing her hair and says

“It’s like a Kalteen bar. It’s Swedish or something”

I furrow my eyebrows and say

“Where did you get these from and what do they do?”

“They make you lose weight. And Cady gave them to me.”

She steps out of the shower and I say

“I don’t trust that girl”

She kind of scoffs and says

“You don’t trust anyone”

I look at her as she dries off and I say

“You’re right. I don’t trust very many people. Do you even know what is in this?”

She shrugs and says

“No.”

I squint and grab the package of the bars and I look up the brand. My eyes widen when I read the description.

All of the ingredients are said to be aids in gaining weight. So I turn to Regina and say

“Spit that out. Right. Now.”

She listens and spits it out, but says

“Why?”

I grab her hand and say

“You know how I said you shouldn’t trust Cady Heron?”

She rolls her eyes and says

“Yes come on tell me”

I sigh and pick up the bar and say

“This shit makes you gain weight. She literally tricked you.”

She takes the information in and then starts screaming.

Loud.

I cover my ears and as she is screaming she goes into her closet and grabs this pink book.

She finally stopped screaming. I’ve never seen this book before so I say

“What’s that?”

“A burn book”

She starts writing something in it and puts her picture in it.

“What is it about?”

She huffs and says

“It has all the girls in our class in it. Talks shit about them.”

I look at her with wide eyes and say

“Am i in it?”

She groans and says

“No. You go to north west. . I go to north shore. It only has north shore juniors in it. Also I’d never let them write anything bad about you anyways.”

I frown and nod my head and say

“What are you doing with it?”

She rolls her eyes and says

“I’m taking it to the school. Showing everyone. Blaming the three bitches who wouldn’t let me sit at my fucking table!”

I widen my eyes and say

“Wait. You couldn’t sit at their table?”

She nods her head and says

“Because I was wearing fucking sweatpants and it wasn’t the day.”

I scoff and say

“Wow. That’s stupid”

She nods and starts crying and says

“Sweatpants are all that fits me right now because of those stupid bars. I thought Cady was nice.”

I sign and nod my head. I run to hug her and say

“Let’s think this through baby. Whatever is in this book is going to ruin some people’s lives right now okay? I know she ruined yours. I know. But there’s no need to be the same way. Remember what we talked about?”

She looks at me and says

“What?”

I smile and say

“When someone hurts us. We get back up. Stand taller than them. And come back better than ever.”

She huffs and says

“Why though? Why can’t I ruin her life?”

I sigh and say

“Regina. Two wrongs don’t make a right. Don’t be the girl that hurt you first okay? Cady is a horrible person. She will have to deal with the consequences of that. But you are a good person.”

She sniffles and says

“I’m actually not”

I frown and say

“Huh?”

“I’m not a good person.”

I laugh softly and say

“What are you talking about baby?”

She sits up and takes a deep breath. It almost looks like she is preparing herself for me to leave her or something.

“Y/n. You know I am pretty popular right?”

I nod my head and say

“What does popularity have to do with anything?”

She looks down and says

“I’m not just popular. I’m like the head bitch in charge. I rule that fucking school. Every girl wants to be me. And I am mean. I’m a bully. I’ve never been nice to anyone. Not even Gretchen or Karen.”

I look at her confused and say

“What are you talking about? That doesn’t sound like you at all”

She sighs and shakes her head.

“I know. Because I am different around you. You make me a better person. But in reality. I am no better than Cady. There’s this one girl. I used to be friends with her. Her name is Janis. I ruined her life in sixth grade. I told everyone she was a lesbian because she was sad when I didn’t hang out with her because I had a boyfriend.”

I nod my head trying to take all this information in.

“And I bullied her so bad that she lit our shared stuffed animal on fire. Because I was using it to call her a lesbian without her knowing. So she lit it on fire. And then I caught my backpack on fire. I knew that. I knew she didn’t try to light my backpack on fire. And what did i do? I called her a pyro-lez. Everyone bullied her too. Trying to be like me.”

I look down and say

“Wow. That. That’s a lot”

She nods her head and says

“I’m sorry. I didn’t want you to find out. I thought we’d make it to college and I could be a completely different person. I thought I could run and be the person I want to be. But when you told me that you were switching schools for senior year I freaked out. Started focusing on everything that was happening this year like my body and my school life so that I could get it all this year. Because I knew the second you found out you’d dump me and then I’d become a loser.”

I nod my head as I listen to her.

“Regina?”

She stops and says

“I’m ready. I’m ready for you to break up with me”

I shake my head and say

“I’m not breaking up with you.”

She furrows her eyebrows as I continue.

“I’m sticking with you. Okay? Clearly you have a lot of things you need to work through. And that’s okay. We all do. But I am not leaving you. I love you okay? I love everything about you. And I’m not going to leave you because I know you can be better”

She nods her head and looks away and says

“Y/n? Why do you love me? I’m not pretty anymore”

I scoff and say

“What? You mean because Cady gave you those fuck ass bars? Because you gained a little weight?”

She nods her head and says

“I’m not pretty like I used to be. My body is ruined.”

I sigh and say.

“Take off your shirt”

Her eyes widen and she says

“What?”

I shake my head and say

“I’m not doing anything. Just take off your shirt okay?”

She does so and I get on my knees in between her legs. I kiss her stomach and I say

“I love your stomach. I love your stomach whether it is skinny and tiny or thicker okay?”

I move down and kiss her thighs

“I love your thighs. Whether or not they have a gap okay?”

She nods her head and I start kissing all over her and I say

“I love every inch of you. Every single inch. You having gained a little weight means nothing to me because you’re so so beautiful.”

Then I stand up and kiss her forehead.

“I love your mind. Because deep down I know you are good. If you really weren’t good I would have left you a long time ago. But you are good. You can be good to everyone.”

She tears up and says

“I want to be good”

I smile and say

“You do?”

She nods and says

“But I don’t know how”

I smile and say

“I’ll help you with that. But you have to look at me first and say you’re pretty”

She hesitates and shakes her head. I raise an eyebrow so she rolls her eyes and sighs. Then she mumbles

“I’m pretty”

I smirk and say

“Now mean it”

Once she realizes she’s not getting out of it, she sighs and for real says

“I love my body. I am pretty”

I smile and say

“Good job baby. Now. Let’s talk about what you’re gonna do now okay?”

She nods her head and I say

“So obviously this Janis girl has been hurt by you.”

She nods her head and I continue

“What are you going to do about that?”

She hesitantly says

“I’m gonna apologize?”

I nod my head and say

“Good job baby. You’re gonna apologize and explain to her why you did it all those years.”

She shakes her head and looks at me with pleading eyes and says

“What if she doesn’t care and still hates me?”

I sigh and say

“That’s a very likely possibility Regina. She might hate you. And that’s okay. Sometimes you have to understand that if you apologized, although it doesn’t make what you did right, it means you were willing to reconcile with them. And if they don’t care then that becomes their problem because you did what you could.”

She nods her head and says

“What else am I gonna do?”

I think and say

“You’re gonna burn that”

I point to the burn book she has and she says

“Why?”

I sigh and say

“Gina. You heard me. That book has the ability to ruin someone’s life. Honestly if I was in it and whatever had been written about me had gotten out I’d probably have hurt myself. We don’t want anyone to do that because of us right?”

She nods her head a lot and says

“I don’t want them to hurt”

I nod and say

“So you’re gonna?”

She finishes

“I’m gonna burn it tonight”

I nod and say

“Good job baby”

Then she says

“Let’s do it now.”

I smile and say

“Okay. Let’s do it now.”

We go to the backyard and I grab some lighter fluid from the barbecue pit and Regina throws the burn book in the fire pit.

I hand her the lighter fluid and she squirts some onto it and then I take it and trade her for the lighter.

She turns to me not knowing how to light it and I give her a bit of fire starter and say

“Wanna record it?”

She nods so I grab my phone and she burns the book.

We sit and watch it turn into ashes and I give her a hug. She turns to me and says

“It kind of feels like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders”

I smile and say

“Good. It should feel that way.”

We put the rest of the fire out and go back inside.

“Okay y/n, what else do I have to do?”

I smile and say

“Well I’m taking you shopping. You can’t go back better than ever wearing the sweatpants that fit you right now. So we’re going to buy some cute clothes in your current size and you’re gonna own it”

She smiles and says

“Okay.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We come back from the shopping spree with two bags in each hand

“That was amazing baby thank you for taking me and spoiling me”

I smile and say

“Anything for my love”

She smiles and then sets out an outfit for the next day.

I smile proudly and she turns around with a doubtful look.

“What if none of it works? What if everyone thinks I’m kidding when I start being nice? What if I don’t get any friends?”

I sigh and say

“It won’t matter. You’ll have me. I’ll always be here for you and next year I’ll be by your side. We are probably getting the same classes since we’re on the same course plan so we’ll have a lot of time together.”

She smiles and says

“Thanks baby you always know how to reassure me.”

I smile and nod.

“Of course baby. You deserve to know you’re not alone”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My school gets off on Fridays so I stayed home while Regina went to school.

She has been texting me all day asking for reassurance that she can do this. And I have nothing to do so I give it.

She is supposed to be talking to Janis this class period since they both have one class.

I told her to do it privately so nobody feels any pressure.

She calls me and I pick up.

“Regina? Baby are you okay?”

“Yeah! I’m good!”

She sounds happy that’s a good sign.

“How’d it go?”

She giggles at someone who is talking to her and she says

“Janis and I talked it out and she’s so fun. I have been talking and laughing with her all period! Thank you for encouraging me to do this.”

I sigh and say

“Did you tell her about the burn book?”

She says

“Mhm. We talked about it and she said I was having problems with internalized homophobia”

I smile and say

“Yeah. That’s probably it. Than what happened?”

“We just started talking and it was like before! When we used to be best friends you know?”

I say

“Mhm”

And she continues

“Hey! So I have to go okay? I don’t want to get in trouble for having my phone out but I just wanted to say that Janis and I are gonna hang out tonight. Is that okay?”

“Yeah that’s fine. Wait before you go did you mean like you’re gonna hang out with her and then hang out with me?”

She giggles at that person again

Probably Janis

“Oh um. I think we’re gonna catch up like a bunch so probably not. We can hang out tomorrow night though right?”

I sigh and say

“Yeah that’s fine baby. Call me tonight?”

She laughs and says

“I will. I love you baby bye bye”

“I love you too bye”

We hang up and I throw my phone on the bed.

Of course I’m a little hurt. We were supposed to go on a date tonight. Like we do every Friday night. But it’s fine. She is just excited about Janis. And that’s okay.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My sister comes into my room in the afternoon and says

“You’re not going to Regina’s?”

I shake my head

“But it’s your date night?”

I smile and say

“She’s catching up with an old friend.”

She makes an oh face and leaves me be.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I’ve been watching movies all evening and it’s almost midnight. I do have to sleep eventually but Regina hasn’t called me yet.

I sigh and accept that she’s not gonna call me tonight so I turn off my tv and go to sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I wake up and check my phone to hopefully see some texts from Regina but nothing shows up.

Just a few emails and snap streaks.

I check all of Regina’s socials and I see her story.

She went to the movies with Janis to watch Inside Out 2.

We were supposed to watch that together.

I tear up because we had planned that since we first saw the trailers for it.

And she watched it without even a thought of me.

I get lost in my thoughts.

Maybe this was her thing the whole time. She bullied Janis because she liked her. And I was just someone to take her mind off of her. But she got her. And I am gonna be left. And after all I did for her? Are you kidding me?! I helped her. I love her. I have so much up for her. And she’s just gonna drop me for this girl?!

I didn’t realize until my phone started ringing that I am crying.

It’s Regina. I check the time and see it’s noon.

I wipe my tears and make myself a little more presentable even though she can’t see me and I pick up.

“Wow baby. You usually pick up after the first ring”

I laugh and cover up the fact that I was just crying and say

“I was in the bathroom sorry”

She hums and says

“How was your night?”

I sigh and say

“It was fine”

“I’m sorry I didn’t call you. It’s just Janis and I had so much fun and she decided to stay over at my house last night and I felt like I would be a bad friend if I called my girlfriend while she was there.”

“It’s okay Gina. I get it. I just wish you texted me”

“I know I just got caught up and had so much fun and forgot. I’m sorry”

“It’s okay.”

After a pause I decided to bring up the movie and say

“So… you and Janis went to the movies last night?”

She hums and says

“Yeah it was so much fun. You would have loved it.”

I feel another tear coming and I suck it up.

“Yeah. What did you guys watch?”

“We watched.. inside out 2”

She trails off when she realizes what we were supposed to do next week. But before she says anything I say

“So you’re cancelling next week? I mean. It would be kind of wasteful to just watch it again right? Waste of time.”

She sighs and says

“I’m so sorry y/n. I completely forgot. Janis had asked me and I just said yes without thinking. We can still go if you want to?”

I say

“No it’s okay. I’ll watch it when it comes out on Netflix or something. I don’t like the movies anyways.”

Lie. I love the movies.

“Huh. I thought you loved the movies?”

I huff and say

“It’s fine.”

She says

“Janis left a few minutes ago and I called as soon as I could.”

I hum and say

“Oh that’s nice. I’m glad you’re catching up with her”

She then says

“Yeah. Want to hang out today?”

“Uhh I don’t know, I’m kinda busy today. I have a lot of chores to do.”

“Oh. Well I could help you with them! Then we could spend time together and they’ll be finished faster so we can hang out!”

I reluctantly give in. I kind of don’t want to hang out with her since I’m hurt but maybe it’ll be easier to explain to her in person.

“Sure. Come over”

“Okay!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Regina gets to my house and immediately hugs me. I melt into her embrace and say

“Thanks for coming.”

“Of course! Anything to hang out with my person!”

I smile awkwardly and just walk back to my chores.

I start folding clothes and Regina tries to talk to me.

“So. What did you do this morning?”

“Slept in”

“Oh. Um did you sleep alright?”

“I slept fine”

“Okay. Did you have a good day yesterday?”

I sigh and say

“Not really”

This is the perfect set up to tell her how I feel. I need to communicate with her better.

“Oh. Why wasn’t it good?”

I fold the last shirt I have and pick up my pile and take it to my room and Regina follows me.

“I don’t know”

I get scared and shut down a bit but Regina knows this play

“Don’t do that. Tell me why it wasn’t good baby”

I put my clothes in my drawer and pick up some shoes and put them in my closet. I end up picking some stuff up and I’m on my knees by my shoes.

I try to say something but nothing comes out. So Regina peeks her head in and says

“Hello?”

I turn from my spot on the ground and tear up slightly.

“Oh baby! Don’t cry! What happened?”

She comes and sits down next to me in my now cramped closet.

“I don’t know. I’m having a hard time saying it”

“I understand that. Take your time baby. I’m here”

I sigh and smile slightly when I realize she has picked up my words from when we were in this situation but reversed.

“I guess- I- ugh this is so hard”

I run my hands through my hair and Regina just listens. She gives me a reassuring look and I feel better about telling her.

“I am hurt I guess. By you. See I love that you are rekindling a friendship that you lost a long time ago but it’s not like you to dip on me okay!”

She furrows her eyebrows and says

“Dip? We didn’t have any plans last night did we?”

I sigh and say

“It was Friday last night. We always make plans. Remember? It was your week to plan it. But that’s not even the only thing. You dipped on me, which I said it was fine because I knew you were excited about being friends with her again, then you didn’t call me like you said you would. And to top it all off I woke up this morning to see you watched a movie with her that we had plans to watch together! I’m just really hurt that you didn’t remember all of that.”

She looks down feeling bad that she did all of that.

“I’m so sorry y/n”

I look at her and say

“It’s fine. I’m just being over dramatic.”

I wipe my tears and go to get up but she grabs me and says

“No. It’s not fine. You should be my priority. But you were not last night. I got so caught up in me and Janis that I completely forgot about you. And that’s not okay. I should have remembered that you and I were going to watch the movie. I should have remembered to call you. But I didn’t.”

I sigh and say

“I’m sorry I just am jealous I guess. I feel like you never act like this and I got scared that you’d leave me for her because you didn’t want me to begin with. I thought maybe you had wanted Janis but didn’t know if you could have her but you knew you could have me”

She laughs and shakes her head

“No baby. I love you so much. I had a lapse of judgment last night. And I apologize. I don’t like Janis like that. Thank goodness. But I won’t leave you. Ever. And by the way. I really appreciate you telling me this. It can take a lot and you’re helping our relationship be better by communicating with me.”

I smile and say

“Thank you baby I’m sorry I got so worked up. I just let my thoughts get to me.”

She nods and says

“I can relate to that”

I smile and say

“So. What do we do now?”

I look around and she does too. We’re still on the floor of my cramped closet and she says

“I guess we cuddle and watch a movie together?”

I smile and say

“I like that idea.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: this totally went the opposite of what I planned but it’s fine 😚 it’s cute either way. I hope y’all liked it!!

Taglist

@ilovesnat @ihartnat @marvelnatasha12346 @moistblobfish @justarandomreaderxoxo

[yuurivoice]

Do you have any sort of dislike toward autistic people?

No??????

This is a wild question, but I'll bite.

I interact with multiple autistic people in my day to day life, and that expands beyond my inner circle of friends and into the broader community as well. As an ADHD haver, we're sorta rubbing elbows here and I wonder what would have turned up had I been tested for autism myself. We spoke about it during my screening and it came up as a "huh, maybe" but we didn't pursue it and it didn't get diagnosed.

In the course of my eight years of doing this whole YuuriVoice thing, I have dealt with a wide variety of internet strangers. Unfortunately this includes people who are purposefully rude, entitled, or some flavor of shitty and I have taken a firm stance when certain attitudes and language smacks me in the face. It has saved me a lot of grief from jerks.

Even more unfortunate is that sometimes there are autistic folks who for no fault of their own might come off that way when dealing with me anonymously, when I have no clue who a person is, what their intentions are, or what tone they are trying to take. So they end up getting bonked when they didn't need to be, and I wouldn't have bonked them in the first place had I known.

As it turns out, when someone is a random anonymous message in a sea of hundreds, I cannot actually decipher who is who or what is what. In any interaction I have had with someone I am familiar with and have even a slight understanding or inkling that they may be autistic, it's a whole different story because I can use my understanding and experience to manage my own expectations and comprehension of the interaction we are having.

It is sort of a strange phenomena because it's not like there's been some sort of sudden spike in autism amongst my audience, that's not how that works. They've been here the whole time. If I had to hypothesize, the latest batch of young adults who've found me might have folks who have not had the same experiences online that us older folks have had that sorta trained us differently. Not to sound like a boomer, but I think most millennials dealing with a variety of cosmic mental gacha rewards could probably attest to this. So we might have a lot of people having new types of interactions in new spaces.

I think on my end, I need to start assuming the best of people's intentions instead of the worst. I had to be hard in the early years, and there were genuinely people who would behave in ways that would bug the shit outta me and it had to be called out and dealt with in the light so people understood the expectation. It could also turn off people, and that was a loss I was willing to accept if it meant people didn't treat me like a content machine to be bent to their will and poked with sticks if their favorite blorbo didn't want to have a damn pet...for example. I swear to you, that exact interaction could happen with someone neurotypical who just wanted to kick my shins and give me a hard time because they didn't like the way I was writing my character. We've seen it happen plenty over the years, I've lived it, it's a thing.

So no, I have no issue with autistic folks. I cannot immediately diagnose someone based of the flavor of their text and assume the nature of their intentions. Through years of being an online person, I've been conditioned to be on the lookout for certain flags and unfortunately there are times where a completely innocent person ends up bumping into a guardrail.

Much like how I cannot control how people react and behave, I would caution against expecting me to not also react and behave in my own ways. I'm a person who struggles with my own shit too, and have had to manage it and purposefully adapt to my situation.

My little comfort characters I cooked up for my own delight ended up getting popular, and at any given moment they're loved, hated, slandered, adored, hyperfixated upon, not good enough, the best thing ever, absolute abominations, or just ALMOST okay but I didn't do it exactly how they would have done it. It's obviously a wonderful thing, that's the dream, people give a fuck about my work! But the downside is, that shit has my head in a blender constantly and is why I try to step back from wading into the deeper waters of the community, because I'm managing my own shit and trying not to make it everyone else's problem.

When things land in my inbox, anonymously, it's a big ol soup of everyone who could at any point be either my biggest hater, biggest fan, or just a troll who wants to piss in my cheerios.

So again, I will endeavor to try and assume the best intentions instead of the worst, and when in doubt I can just...STFU and not respond. It's that easy, so I should probably keep that in mind.

Hopefully that helps explain some of what's up in that regard, and certainly if anyone has felt like they've burdened me or been a nuisance, they should know that I understand and immediately recatagorize that interaction in my brain. So for example, the Finn Pet thing, I responded by stating that I was uncomfortable and understood and accepted that they did not have ill intentions. I'm not going to pretend I liked the question or the tone, but I respect that it was not coming from a place of trying to give me a hard time and I don't hold it against them. I like to think that is how moments of unintentional friction should be handled among adults. Apologies do not suddenly make things okay or undo your discomfort, but there is an understanding of the intent and an acceptance. I don't want to infantalize people, if I said "awww it's okay you're not dumb here let me indulge your headcanon" that not only sends the wrong message about how to respond to people who self depricate in response to negative reactions, but...no, I'm not just going to double back and treat the question differently.

Alright, I gave this a whole lotta energy and genuine care. I hope it is taken as such and we're all square.

[spoondoodles]

I blacked out and more Logince HS AU appeared on my canvas idk what happened (also ty @oatmeal-stans-the-trash-rat for some inspiration sorry it took so long to make a post about Them <3)

[altoskh]

Imso tired man. I'm so tired. Why do I work this hard I am so FUCKING over this shit

[pondscummy]

the "also sick" comment isn't like "btw I'm SICK, how dare you not know" it's me saying I'm sick like how 2/3 of my roommates are

but like I'm so;;;; it feels so rich that L is like wtf do you want from me about me not replying for 45 minutes when I had to beg his gf over hours and hours of texts every so often to not force me to sit in unwiped shit after my surgery bc she had openly told me she just didn't rly feel like setting up the attachable bidet after telling me for weeks she would, and I never ever got a reply from her or L ever acknowledging that they were wide awake hanging out and laughing while I was like stuck in bed barely able to move begging for follow through on a commitment they made in advance and i eventually had to spend over $100 to hire someone to come out the next day and do it for me and I had to hold my shit for hours lmfao

like L is sooooo great at couching things in flawless tumblr wellness speak but only to talk about how valid they are for not showing up for you and how fucked up it is that you MIGHT ever have a moment where you can't be 100% there w them. like idk what to tell you I've been laying in bed with a sore throat and cough and fever passing out and waking up to roll over in buckets of sweat like the rest of the house. I do genuinely get being annoyed by a lack of response but it's also right back to this whole thing about Always assuming I'm mad at them which is legit one of the only things that actually makes me mad fjdkddhk like bro I do not THINK about you when you're not acting like I'm a bomb about to blow (also, as an aside -- we all take turns buying TP and it's usually me who does it like it's not out of pocket for me to say hey you are the One person who is out of the house already rn, can you get this on your way bc None of the bathrooms have back up rolls and one is totally out and I had to text our sickest roommate telling her to use the bidet and drip dry like.... "am I the first person you asked" yes bc you are the person who makes the most sense dumbfuck. I'm not being "overly needy" toward you or whatever jfc)

they literally told me at one point that the reason they're so scared of me is that my face is "triggering" for them when I'm angry or not feeling good and puts them "back in a really bad place" they have seen my face angry literally 3 times and each time it was on my way back to my room to decompress and each time I said nothing to them other than that I was in a bad mood and I was going to go to my room. I didn't yell either I just said it normal. like I genuinely feel gaslit here like I'm this horrifying monster of a man when it's like dude sometimes people are mad I don't know what YOU want from ME!! I do all my venting here where they can't ever see it even tho we've blocked each other, I censor their name like anyone even knows who they are, I isolate to chill out and it's literally been less than a handful of times like should I fling myself from the roof??????? would that fix it???

I literally know it's bc I'm a man too. none of this was like this until my facial hair came in more and it got crazy worse after I got top surgery and they're so so vocal about how much they despise men and think men should all fuck off and die and there's only a handful of acceptable men that they've personally vetted. despite them pretty clearly having a trans woman fetish bc they only date or look at porn of trans women and they do the whole step on me mommy thing about it even tho their gf has complained like. lmfao you're just a baby te//rf even tho you ID as trans masc yourself. like that's all this even is. I'm a big (5'3") scary (spent the whole weekend w my coworkers asking if I was 12) man who's obviously going to snap and kill you all bc sometimes I *checks writing on hand* get frustrated and go lay down about it

[un-pearable]

i treat all my interests like the repressed middle schooler i was - desperately hiding them and cringing whenever someone even insinuates they know i enjoy it while shamefully consuming content about it constantly in private - for about a month before i make a sharp 180 and become The most obnoxious about the subject and tell every single person in my life about it incessantly. this cycle repeats every single time

[toastsnaffler]

my flatmate asking me the day before "do u want to hang out w me and [old friend] everyone else cancelled so I can invite u now" is not the heartfelt offer she thinks it is :^/

[nnugatoryextravagance]

You do not understand the abject horror and whiplash i got seeing the names 4lung and glitchedpuppet mentioned in a post on my dash out of nowhere last night good lord get me the fuck out of here IM NOT GOING BACK TO 2018 IM NOT GOING BACK TO 2018 RAAAGH GET AWAYY GET AWAAY

[caricature-of-a-witch]

I swear by the time I have finished this paper there will be claw marks in my brain matter because I have to forcibly drag it towards and hold it to the document in order to get anything done there's a magnetic force repelling the two things and I am so tired

It's gonne be the shittiest least coherent paper in the history of papers and if I end up having tortured my brain for nothing and not passing the course I don't know how I'll deal with that lol

[wizardnuke]

beau....ohhuuugh

[exopelagic]

I am baking cake at midnight and it is going to kill me <3

[29121996]

.

[absentlyabbie]

seriously, though. i work in higher education, and part of my job is students sending me transcripts. you'd think the ones who have the least idea how to actually do that would be the older ones, and while sure, they definitely struggle with it, i see it most with the younger students. the teens to early 20s crowd.

very, astonishingly often, they don't know how to work with .pdf documents. i get garbage phone screenshots, sometimes inserted into an excel or word file for who knows what reason, but most often it's just a raw .jpg or other image file.

they definitely either don't know how to use a scanner, don't have access to one, or don't even know where they might go for that (staples and other office supply stores sometimes still have these services, but public libraries always have your back, kids.) so when they have a paper transcript and need to send me a copy electronically, it's just terrible photos at bad angles full of thumbs and text-obscuring shadows.

mind bogglingly frequently, i get cell phone photos of computer screens. they don't know how to take a screenshot on a computer. they don't know the function of the Print Screen button on the keyboard. they don't know how to right click a web page, hit "print", and choose "save as PDF" to produce a full and unbroken capture of the entirety of a webpage.

sometimes they'll just copy the text of a transcript and paste it right into the message of an email. that's if they figure out the difference between the body text portion of the email and the subject line, because quite frankly they often don't.

these are people who in most cases have done at least some college work already, but they have absolutely no clue how to utilize the attachment function in an email, and for some reason they don't consider they could google very quickly for instructions or even videos.

i am not taking a shit on gen z/gen alpha here, i'm really not.

what i am is aghast that they've been so massively failed on so many levels. the education system assumed they were "native" to technology and needed to be taught nothing. their parents assumed the same, or assumed the schools would teach them, or don't know how themselves and are too intimidated to figure it out and teach their kids these skills at home.

they spend hours a day on instagram and tiktok and youtube and etc, so they surely know (this is ridiculous to assume!!!) how to draft a formal email and format the text and what part goes where and what all those damn little symbols means, right? SURELY they're already familiar with every file type under the sun and know how to make use of whatever's salient in a pinch, right???

THEY MUST CERTAINLY know, innately, as one knows how to inhale, how to type in business formatting and formal communication style, how to present themselves in a way that gets them taken seriously by formal institutions, how to appear and be competent in basic/standard digital skills. SURELY. Of course. RIGHT!!!!

it's MADDENING, it's insane, and it's frustrating from the receiving end, but even more frustrating knowing they're stumbling blind out there in the digital spaces of grown-up matters, being dismissed, being considered less intelligent, being talked down to, because every adult and system responsible for them just

ASSUMED they should "just know" or "just figure out" these important things no one ever bothered to teach them, or half the time even introduce the concepts of before asking them to do it, on the spot, with high educational or professional stakes.

kids shouldn't have to supplement their own education like this and get sneered and scoffed at if they don't.

[thedevotionaltour]

in terms of art alone im sorry. im a jrjr defender to my last breath you be fucking nice to him. i dont wanna hear shit❗️❗️❗️