#it’s clear that when the Thing happened they got fcuked up by it

[enderspawn]

also i must add that it is CRITICAL to my enjoyment of rolan that he fucking hates the idea of going to therapy and calls them all ‘shrinks’. it makes him a fun extra flavor of fucked up you cant remove it

[spicyicymeloncat]

Crystalised part 2 ep 23, 24, 25, 26 spoilers

Yeah I put them all in one post lol

Ep 23

Again, using minecraft logic

Antonia’s “I fished out the last one it’s your turn” lol wow, she makes it seem like this happens often

Antonia did the “if I had a nickel” meme

Oh frick Nya survived?? Also no legs for Nya??

Ofc casual sexism from the mechanic. She has a name!

Okay Jay didn’t crash!! Hell yeah Jay saving Nya for once!

The mechanic is anti jaya also that was such a sick line jay

Okay her fuckin legs are fine now ig

Also Nya’s gonna become water again :(

I think it’s weird that the Crystal warriors can pass out tho

Again city that never sleeps. Paperboys still gonna do their thing amidst a freaking war

Wu: I can’t do child soldiers

Nelson, pointing at the ninja: wtf are these then???

BENTHO IS COMING BACK :D

HELL YEAH LET NINJAGO CITY FIGHT BACK FOR ONCE

Oh gosh that was sick

ep 24

OH MAN THE THUMBNAIL

Lloyd rlly said frick you man

EXCUSE ME POLICE BUT WTF ARE UR PRIORITIES?? THE MAYOR IS GONE NOW WHAT LAW ARE U EVEN USING

NOOO NOT THE SERPENTINE :[ that’s so sadddd

Lloyd really blew his mind there

MISAKO FINALLY CAME BACK FOR A SEASON

I feel like the prophecy guy was brought up before but idk how to spell his name lol

PIXAL MY BELOVED I LOVE HER SO MUCH

Man zane is on the fritz

Oh god he has no limbs man that’s kinda fcuked up man jeez.

However the the ice emperor schtick is kinda funny

Oh my god he’s in a rucksack

OH MY FUCKING GOD ICE EMPEROR IS ONLY BACK FOR COMEDY not what I was expecting but I’ll take it

Hell yeah Ronin! Pixal and Ronin team up will be interesting

Omg the other sog who basically got completely rejected by Harumi this time round. Rip Pixal everyone is evil even her boyfriend

Hell yeah Ronin!! Trying to actually break out of the cycle

Also freaking Zane kicking ronin with his foot

Zane: vex? Vex! Wtf is vex when you need him

Ofc Cyrus didn’t even know

Ep 25

it’s the lava episode :)

Aww man Cole really hit his head

Okay even if I’m not a Kailor shopper I support skylor calling Kai hot shot

Ig this episode really will say which ship is canon

Freaking pythor. I love him

I guess Harumi is looking for lloyd

I would just like to remind people I coined Embershipping for the Kai/skylor/cole ship

ITS JAKE

I’m literally gonna start crying about Garmadon. Mans has half of his emotions but in the ways he’s expressing them, he’s sad about how Lloyd doesn’t accept the Oni heritage that he himself has and how christofern is a weird confused metaphor for Lloyd :((((

Gayle and vinny xxxx

God clutch literally has Nadakhan still oh my god

Okay this door must be a Chekhov’s gun bc they’re so gonna answer a knock that isn’t the paper boys

26

OH NO I DO NOT LIKE THIS EPISODE TITLE

Okay so I assume the romance is gonna get cleared up in this ep. We see the harbour so we know jaya is a thing. We’re looking at Kailor at the start. And like. Pixane… I’m gonna cry

Okay thank god we’re addressing the problems with them right here and now. I’ll hate the ship significantly less if they do this right.

Okay that’s fair

(I’m still a lava shipper tho)

No I refuse any couple shit from wusako no thanks

FreKing Garmadon. He’s like my baby brother whenever someone is on the phone

RACER SEVEN OH I LOVE HER SLSO

OR LIKE BLAZEY is it blazey? H SPEED. I love her

Oh my gosh. I hope Rarlkove integrates Pixal into the long con snake jaguar au

UV just 👉👈 at pixal

:(((( Zane. Has borg tried turning him off and ok again? Putting him in a bag of rice? Giving him a few thumps on the back? What if we just say “protect those who can’t protect themselves” that worked in s11

THEY LET BLAZEY KEEP A PRIME EMPIRE GUN??

ZANE YOU CANT KEEP DOING THIS HOW MANY FUNERALS DO YOU WANT MAN

WHAT THE FUCK THE PIXANE KISS

ZANE IM GOING TO DISMANTLE YOU MYSELF YOU SLEEPING BEAUTY FUCK

PIXAL SQUEALING

FUGIDOVE IS EVERYONE

THE SAM X SUIT LOOKS COOL

Okay barely any jaya and I look forward to draw Zane’s fucked up face but like JEEZ MAN HE DONE DID IT AGAIN ITS LIKE HE SAID NINJA NEVER QUIT… DYING

At least that’s a good place to stop

[zombeamik]

OKAY LIVE REACTION TO RIKAS BACKSTORY DLC HERE WE GO

okay so spoilers again lol

okay so i thought when you played the scret ending 1? riaks backstory was free? e-e

HAHA NVM WAS JUST THE FIRST EPISODE time to go buy 330 hour glasses ANYWAYS

okay seriosuly thing for people who dont like Rika, for what she did. You should honestly play her backstory.. it really could clear some things up for you, and it may chnage your mind, just abit hopefully.

you shouldnt just say no to story, just because you don’t like her.

Of course, if you really dont want to read it fine, but it can probably really help.

Episode 1

this god lady sounds like Jaehee tbh SO CUTEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE OH Mina is Rikas real name :3 How cute already liking this. WONT BE ABLE TO AFFORD THE RETS OF IT THOUGH

Mina/Rika, they really didnt deserve what happened to them.

HOLY FCUK I HONESTLY THOUGHT MIKA WAS FUCKING RIKA BUT IT WAS THE OTHER WAY AROUND OKAY OR AM I GETTING TI MIXED UP?

okay gotta buy 330 hours glasses but THEN ILL CONTINUE MY REACTION

OKAY IM BACK TO REACT AND TO CRY OKAY COOL

the game didnt like me buying more hourglasses o it decided to messwith mu audio.

okay had to restart my phone THANKS ANOTHER SETBACK

Episode 2

okay so, i like Mika back here. BUT WHAT I SAW IN THE V ROUTE, thats not cool Mika. you were kinda okay? you were already a little manipulative to a three year old. “My little sister, should always have short hair” how about you shut up. Twins? All she ever wated was to be loved and not taken away from her “Twin”, Maybe thats why she cared so much for Saeran and Saeyoung before she ddi what she did. Mika no, no. You’re the one who put those awful things in Minas/Rikas mind ugh okay i go back to not liking her, that was very fast.

Okay grown up Rika/Mina, okay rika i like you when you arent doing ur creepy eyes. UGH honestly im so mad at Mika, honestly the fuck. CUTE PICTURES OF V AND RIKA YES okay i know, i like V and all but tbh they were cute together.

excuse me V you shouldve said THATS WHY I ADORE UR SUN BC THATS ALL SHE NEEDED TO HEAR, she didnt want to hear that you loved her because of her darkness.  She wnated someone to love her, or show her a tiny bit of warmth so she could find the light inside her. So, so far, Mika is the one who introducded her to this “darkness” SO UNLESS RIKAS BACKSTORY CAN GIVE ME A REASON TO NOT DISLIKE MIKA AND FORGIVE HER I WILL GLADLY TAKE IT.

Episode 3

THATS THE FIRST THING I OPEN UP TO? 

UR SO CREEPY, WHY DID GOD SEND YOU? THE FUCK WHAT KIND OF ASSHOLE ADOPTIVE PARENTS ARE YOU

sorry what?

Mina, Serena

Im glad she went with Rika, I like Mina, but Rika ive gotten used to it. Maybe she’ll go back to Mina one day?

Oh. Okay i dont like Rika/Mina/Serena’s Mother. and the pastor, no wonder she started a cult, i mena look at his outfit. WHAT KIND OF SHITTY PASTOR ARE YOU

NO WONDER SHE STARTED A FUCKING CULT, YOU ARE ALL DOUCHEBAGSSSSSSSS

“NEEDS ALOT OF PRAYERS” how about you shut up, man,  Pastor my fucking ass, Devil worshipper is more fucking likely.

excuse me pastor, your voice in my ears IS FUCKING CREEPY DO YOU MIND

UR LIKE A PERVERT

“ your body has grown, is it satan?” HOW ABOUT YOU MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS AND LEAVE HER ALONE

yep, i fully understamd now why she created a cult. okay im only on 3 of 8 but still

EXCUSE ME LADY, YOUR DAUGHTER CLEARLY SAID NOT O GOING WITH THE PASTOR LEARN SOME FUCKING MANNERS AND DONT BE A RUDE BITCH

I THOUGHT WE WERE LOOKING FOR HER FATHER?

WHY DID WE FIND MIKA IM SO CONFUSED

oh, her dads the head of the hospital, okay. all good.

YEAH YOU TELL HIM MIKA

YEAH THANK YOU NURSE KICK HIM OUT P[LEASE

WEEE THANKS NURSE

she just wnated to be free from hatred? 

BUT NOBODY WOULD ALLOW HER, THEY KEPT PUSHING HER FURTHER INTO THE DARKNESS

okay gone back to not liking Mika just abit

oh.

now i dont know?

Episode 4

THATS NOT WHAT I WANTED TO HEAR EITHER

Mika had cacner in her eyes.

Mika lived a while though, so her dad must have paid the bills.

MIKA LIED ABOUT THE PHONE NUMBER AND THE ADRESS THE FCUK

Did she really grow up at the orphange? PROBABLY FUCKING NOT

I was just feeling sad for her, but then she did that.

WAIT RIKA HONEY NO ITS NOT YOUR FAULT OF WHAT HAPPENED.

Oh.

so she made V blind because of that?

PUPPY

okay no, no new puppy then.

MS. HEAD OF THE RFA

no v, shes brainwashed him.

THE BOTANICAL GARDEN

No V you should focus on saeyoung because ive turned saeran into somebody i regret now.

Rika no.

you didnt have to shut everyone out, 

he asked you to leave?

Ugh im so confused?

WELL MIKA WAS RIGHT TEACHER THEY WERE BAD PARENTS

GROSS PASTOR PLEASE DONT SAY LITTLE LABM AROUND MINA, THATS CREEPY

Oh.

right yeah, she only separated saeran and saeyoung because of their parents.

Mika, why. 

she didnt have to lie about the orphanage, and then why you said you made Rika think it was all her fault, and then ugh

A FUCKING PUPPY 

WAIT SALLY

SHUT UP MOTHER, ITS A CUTE DOG AND WE BOTH LOVE IT

YEAH SALLY YOU GROWL AT HER

Oh.

I KNEW IT

the pastor is a creep, a pervert, child molester

EXCUSE ME MOTHER?

THATS THE FUCKING RITUAL TO GET SATAN OUT OF HER? 

EXCUSE ME THAT IS FUCKING ILLEGAL PASTOR OR NOT

dont fucking freak out, you told her to leave because you didnt want sally in the house and now your like THE FUCK YOU GOING SERENA HUH? ugh

Rika no, that isnt the right choice.

EXCUS ME MIKA DIED?

THEN WHO THE FUCK WAS THERE WHEN RIKA WAS OLDER

DID MIKA LIE ABOUT DYING?

SALLY UR SO CUTE

oh bad momesnt to mention sally being cute.

listen, all rika every wanted was to love someone.

defo a cult, Believer’s? This some sort of god cult.

WAIT NO SALLY DONT CRY

oh she was 16.

oh dear.

well that was a roller coaster

Episode 5

great she started working a church, and became a nun. even more fantastic

OH SWEET HER NAME IS FINALLY RIKA

I do like the names Mina and Serena but still Rika.

well wjat she thought she was doing was okay. Not wanting anyone to be abandoned?

she just uh turned it into something alot bigger than helping out at a church

She only treated people the way she did was because she didnt know how loving parents acted, so what she thought she was doing was right to her, since she didnt know anything else.

okay so shes 18.

and she wnated to shoe people her light instesd fo her darkness

AN THEN SHE MEETS V

OH THE CLOUD PHOTO, man when she looked at it she said Mother, because thats the first thing that came to mind. 

SHE JUST WNATED TO BE A SUN BUT DIDNT KNOW HOW

SAEYOUNG

WHY DOES TINY SAEYOUNG SOUND LIKE BIG SAEYOUNG

oh

yeah she thought that of she didnt protect saeyoung he’d rot just like Mika.

heh

Oh.

she could see her and mIka in him so she grew attached

she onyl wanted to do good

Rika the Angel but she thought of herself as Rika the Devil ok

Episode 6

YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSUNG

okay so she didnt want yoosung to find out about her darkness

Rika honey, its okay. he still would ahve loved you.

Okay so Oh got it okay.

Yoosung is the son of rikas mothers sister,

SHE WAS SO WORRIED HE’D BE RUINED IF HE STAYED CLOSE

RIKA NO DONT OUT YOURSELF DOWN

YOU’RE EQUAL TO YOOSUNG D:

REUSING PHOTOS ARENT YOU CHERITZ OK

BUT HYE V

she couldnt feel anything? well V is both light and dark rika.

man v still doesnt know rikas real name BUT WE DOOOOO

episode 7

Man v ur kinda smooth with words but at the same time like you just met.

V MAKE UP UR FUCKING MIND

okay so she modelled for V and then when she was doing that they didnt talk much? man V atleast tell her she did good. how rude.

ZENNNN

v the fuck you didnt even say goodbye, just IM GONNA GO GRAB MY CAMERA AND THEN FCUKING WALK OFF

V no.

you didnt even compliment her or anything, you just said heres lets take pictures but we aint gonna talk and thn when your done, i aint gonna say you did well or anything like that.

V you kinda an asshole.

NO SALLY

okay shes fine.

V was just curious about me because im not like the rest”

kinda sounds like it,

YES RIKA YOU DO DESERVE THE SUN HONEY

YOU ARE THE SUN I THOUGHT WE ALREADY ESTABLISHED THIS

oh so it was Mina that wanted to be loved.

well shes still a prt of you rika, so that measn you wanted to be loved aswell.

okay so she stopped visiting V

V came to visit her

make up your fuckingmind V

“Heathen Cult”

well yeah basically.

JUMIN

V WHAT THE FUCK

“ can you show me how dark you are?”

HOW ABOUT A FUCKING NO

SHE CLEARLYT SAID NO V

YOU BETTER NOT FUCKING PUSH HER TO SHOW YOU

okay all good

she told V everything

and she scared she;ll end up like Mika.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

ANOTHER V AND RIKA PHOTO

HUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGS

WAIT HONEY DONT CRY

MINA YEEE

LAST EPISODE 

wow thats fast.

okay so saeyoung went abroad and then she stopped disagreeing when saeren was saved

then she met Jumin a year later, sweet.

HAPPY ENDING

WELL YOU HAVE ONE NOW RIKA UR HAPPY AND YEEE

okay so then she got her aparement

and then she dint know if things to turn to the worst or the best

well id say the worst but you did save alot of people.

you may have brainwashed them but they would ahve probably died without her help.

MIKA UR STILL ALIVE

UR BLIND THO

OH

YUP OKAY GOT IT

MIKA DIDNT TURST V SO RIKA WAS LIKE OK YEAH I DONT EITHER BC UR ALWAYSSSSSS RIGHT

right.

Mina believed her.

so she agreed.

SO CUTE

WHAT

MIKA NO

USE SAERAN AND YRUN HIM INTO A HACKER

HOW ABOUT YOU SHUT UP MIKA

IM BACK TO NOT LIKING YOU

MINA 

YOU

YOU MANIPULATED MINA INTO DOING YOUR DIRTY WORK

SHE TRUSTED AND YOU

AND YOU USED HER

“I must not use that boy. I must save him”

WELL THANK YOU RIKA

what kind of bullshit is that.

WELL YOU SHOULD DEFIENTLY TELL V BUT WHEN MIKA SAY NO YOU GOTTA AGREE BECAUSE MINA TRUSTS HER

EXCUS EME RIKA

MINA WAS THE LIGHT

mika is the dark

mika just please shut up.

okay she died. thats sad but like

NOT AFTER WHAT YOU DID

CUTE PHOTO OF RIKA YES

Thoughts

thst was um

one crazy ride

AND I WAS THERE FOR IT

so glad i read it.

even if you dont like rika at all

please do

its worth it.

as you can see my thoughts were jumbled in the actual live reaction

but it makes alot of sense kind aof?

im to lazy to write a review so thats the best you’re gonna get.

Its really good, to actually understand why Rika/Mina/Serena turned out the way she was.

i mena i already forgave her in the V ending

but even though she did those bad things, if someone just loved her and didnt feeed her with horrible views of the world, she was still a caring girl even though the darkness took a hold of her,

Im not glad of what happened to her, but if it didnt we would have never even met anyone. so as mucha s i hate to say it, im glad of what happened, and 100% glad we could help her through with it.

Okay, well that was fun.

[faunusrights]

OFFAL HUNT REMASTER LIVEBLOG // CHAPTER 9

oh goody!

well this is it. the Date Chapter. the chapter, in which, the Date happens. lowkey im so fucking hype for this stupid goddamn chapter AAAAAAAAAAAA this is when the sexy got kicked up about seven notches and i know its gonna be a fucking twenty from here on out so LETS GO LESBIANS LETS GO

“Is this your date, Ms. Fall?” he asked.

Cinder didn’t look away from Glynda. “Mhm.”

STRAIGHT OUT OF THE GODDAMN GATE WE DIDN’T EVEN HAVE A SECOND TO EVEN GATHER OURSELVES JUST STRAIGHT UP HUH!!!!!!!!! ‘is this your date’ im legally dead

What the fuck.

already im fucking THRIVING im so glad this chapter’s mood got encapsulated within the first ten seconds and im definitely gonna have to re-read this chapter for the full unannotated experience OOOOOOOOOH MY GOD IM SO READY

Glynda’s thoughts ricocheted inside her head like coins left in a dryer. A part of her couldn’t understand what was happening and disengaged. The rest of her, grasping for purchase in all this, reasoned that going with Cinder was better than staying here confused, alone, and utterly displaced.

glynda ‘i aint ever had a gf before’ goodwitch at her PEAK right here. like GOD shes gone from ‘cinder’s trying to murder me’ to ‘cinder just plopped me right into a date’ like CINDER. CINDER YR CHANGING GEARS SO FAST. YOU DIDNT EVEN SEND FLOWERS OR ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

is it because shes a u-haul lesbian or

Higher, Glynda realized the dress itself was backless, revealing the black tattoo she’d seen so often before, perfectly centered between sharp shoulder blades.

this gay energy is BONKERS, quite frankly??????? where did cinder get her dress from? why does she have it? did she buy it just for this fuckery? or will she pull the ‘i just had a this lil number laying around’ line????????? does she wanna seduce glynda to death?????? was this PLANNED OR DID SHE JUST DECIDE SHE WANTED A DATE AND WTH LIFE REALLY IS SHORT ON REMNANT THESE DAYS?????????? cinder fall please explain your workings to the class

maybe Glynda wasn’t the only one who’d become adept at reading her opponent.

👏 when 👏 will 👏 they 👏 kiss 👏 already 👏👏👏��

me: this is a slowburn also me: if u assholes dont give me this in the next ten seconds-

“Unarmed? As if you could be so helpless.”

cinder’s style of flirting is just. commentating on a person’s deadliness. that’s IT it’s the only TRICK SHE HAS and its working, is the thing,

im reading the description of the table and remembering the shitpost and oh my god i have to draw this???? hell IS real!!!!!! COULDNT YALL JUST TOSS EM IN A PLAIN BOX,

Cinder eyed her from her bastion of dark cushions,

cinder, ass-deep in cushions: this is peak cuddle territory come and join me

Cinder, for her part, seemed delighted Glynda had noticed. Touching the pendant more gently than Glynda might have ever thought her capable of, Cinder said,  “Yours? You didn’t seem to mind parting with it.”

im still deeply enjoying this powermove the novelty NEVER wears off (and at risk of light spoilers i do enjoy its place in this story 👀)

Cinder let the necklace drop, settling against the swell of her bust once more,

/lightly coughs 👀👀👀

im losing my MIND at how gay this bit is i physically cannot HANDLE IT and if they even describe the meal once im gonna pop off cause i am. SO HUNGRY RN. AAAAAAAAAAAA

Cinder indicated a dish of lamb and vegetables, served on a bed of rice and drizzled in some sort of sauce.

SRY THIS ISNT GAY BUT OH MY GOD IM SO HUNGRY I WANNA E A T I T THAT SOUNDS SO GOOD UGHGHGHGHGHGH WHY DID THIS CHAPTER HAVE TO BE TODAY OF ALL THE DAYS,

Glynda cleared her throat, working out: “The Grimm.”

like. GOD WE KNOW GLYNDA IS JUST SO FUNCTIONALLY BAD AT CONVERSATION BUT OF ALL THE THINGS glynda please just. just. stop thinking abt her sexy tattoos for a fifth of a second,

“You can control them.” A sedate blink. For all the world, Glynda might have just commented on the weather.

which is a faux pas for a date!!!!!!!!!!! at least tell her the DRESS IS SEXY WE ALL KNO WHATS WHAT YR THINKIN ABT

Glancing down as though it were being pointed out to her for the first time, Cinder shrugged and adjusted the end of the glove a little higher on her bicep. “And?” 

a quick aside im enjoying how like... visually expressive cinder is in this remaster! i can see her facial expressions and her motions really clearly in my mind’s eye which is a fun little boon if only because i have to redraw this nonsense hjsgdfjhfksgd but cinder’s got a Good Face this time around! A QUALITY FACE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You should know by now, there’s something about you that’s simply irresistible to Grimm.”

HERE COMES THE PLOT (and a single surviving line so far... this one sentence has survived all the world could throw at it... we stan)

Cinder straightened, and Glynda saw that this was what she’d been waiting for.

“It isn’t every day the great Glynda Goodwitch kneels before her adversary, is it?”

HELLO??????????????????????????? WHATS THIS WORDING????????? honestly tho for a second i thought she meant like. quite literally and i thought id missed some PROPER SHIT RIGHT THERE BUT YEAH WTH!!!!!!! C I N D E R

“You cheated. You can’t beat me on your own.”

yes glynda we gathered that yr a top

“Really, Glynda? Poison?” she sneered, something like offense simmering in her expression. “After all this?”

looks at the camera

anyway,

god im literally losing grasp of words to say because theres such a charged mood in this scene............. theyre brushing fingers............ trading jabs.......... im slurpin it up babey!!!!!!!! this rly is the BEST remaster of this whole scene it DESERVES this wordcount!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“Beat you,” Cinder corrected. “And call it a point of pride.”

yes cinder we gathered yr a brat,

this dynamic is why this fic is so fuckign good when will winter have a swift return to add even more fuckery to this wild ride

Then, with a heavy-lidded look, Cinder found Glynda’s hand between them, the touch so sudden and daring that Glynda flinched. The fabric of those gloves was smooth against Glynda’s flesh, and for all that cruelty had marked every other instance of contact between them, Cinder was surprisingly gentle.

whomp there go my nuts

WHAT IS THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHO MADE THE EXECUTIVE CHOICE TO ADD THIS LINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HELLO???????????? im losing my BRAINCELLS

What she wasn’t ready for was for Cinder to guide her hand to her own throat and hold it there.

THERE IS IT THERE’S THE KINK IT’S BEEN SPOTTED

oh my GOD what even IS THIS WHO ADDED THIS SECTION WHO ALLOWED THIS TO COME TO P A S S WHAT THE FUCK EVEN IS RN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HELLO????????? HEWWO??????????

Now… Now Cinder interested her.

tbh how can i liveblog this? what commentary can i POSSIBLY add that we arent already all THINKING. we just launched into a level of hell so deep that lucifers gonna have to pull some goddamn tricks to follow us down here!!!!!!!!!! WHAT IS THIS SCENE! THIS MOMENT! IM SCREAMING

Glynda mirrored the expression back at him, and finally, he coughed, not making strong eye contact with either of them. He set their plate before them and hurried out without so much as a check-in.

i just KNEW that was gonna happen JHGDSFGJHKSDF he was gonna walk in on SMTHNG but i didnt think itd be CINDER’S CHOKING KINK,

okay i took a break and ate my weight in roast chicken and we’re back babey

Almost nervously, her fingers carded through her own dark hair, and there, among the locks, Glynda spotted a glimpse of something white, structured and ridged.

AND I AM INSTANTLY KNOCKED BACK UPON MY ASS 👈W👈H😨A👈T👈

It was easier to ignore the rest of it—whatever it was.

glynda you are a fool and a moron im withering into DUST

On no level had she expected those to be Glynda’s words.

then what... did she expect... well probably -- and rightly so -- ‘bitch WHAT ARE THOSE’ TBH

wait sorry i have to jump back because i forgot customary fingerguns on the most brazen bit of Shit yet:

Cinder was occupying herself with something else: the head of a dragon, perched over the door and staring down at the two of them with red, glossy eyes.

👈👈👈😎👈👈👈

okay BACK TO THE FIC

Fangs snapped together around the word.

aka back to me horni

/chanting TEETH! TEETH! TE

okay but the reason i doubled back to catch that fingergun is because we’re getting ass-deep into plot now!!!!!!!!!!! WITCHES AND DRAGONS BABEY......... HERE’S WHAT OFFAL HUNT IS ALL ABT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i cant rly drop more fingerguns than that because any astute reader will start realising the dots im shouting abt and honestly half the fun of this fic is the ride so >:3c

“Funny. I was sure he would have told you.”

that blow was so low i think cinder hit the concrete with that one

oh god theyre gonna get to the bit and i-

“Is that what all of this has been about? You called me here to remind me that I'm autistic?”

/SCREAMS

The words were delivered firmly, calmly, but Cinder’s response was the opposite, sudden upheaval seizing her. Her expression opened in something akin to panic. “Wh—no? What? No! That's not what I—”

/SCREAMS

oh my GOD CINDER YOU HAVE FUCKED UP LEGENDARILY!!!!!!!!!! OH MY GOD SHE WAS FELL ASS-FIRST ONTO A LANDMINE OH MY GOD

offal hunt v1 cinder: im totally in control and im playing glynda every step of the way

offal hunt v2 cinder: OH JESUS OH FUCK OH NO THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT-

Cinder seemed genuinely stressed now, speaking quicker as though trying to bury the last sixty seconds.

i knew this remaster would have sections that would blow me away but this bit really took the fcuking cake DGHSJFSJHFDG holy SHIT this is AMAZING

It was difficult to tell in the low light, but if Glynda wasn't mistaken, there was a bright flush of embarrassment coloring Cinder’s cheeks.

this is SUCH prime content hey remember in one of the early liveblogs that cinder would descend into full dork? WELL THE DESCENT CAME EARLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! /pops bottles

“Cinder.” There was a very real line of threat in Glynda’s tone. “Don’t.”

oh this whole scene just keeps getting better i am LOVING this dynamic now!!!!!!! before it was all pretty one-sided so having the conversation rock back and forth is 👌👌👌

That Witch soul of yours—it was designed to void out everything but the prey before you. To be numb to all human emotion. To focus on the hunt and nothing else.

finally the fruit of 50% of my fingerguns COMES TO LIGHT!!!!!!!!!!! PLOT PLOT PLOT

“This is bullshit.” Jabbing an accusing finger at Cinder, Glynda said, “You’re a liar. You’re a criminal!”

i LOVE glyndas pottymouth in this its such a good like... change from her being strict and formal and teachery and now shes full on gremlin huntress hell YES BABY!!!!!!!!!! GO OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“There’s all kinds of things I bet he never told you.” Cinder continued. “Did you know he was close to your predecessor? The Witch who came before you—they were inseparable.”

SRY IM LIKE STRUGGLIN TO COMMENTATE because so much of this like. speaking as an Old-Ass Reader this is like. a LOT! A LOT HAS CHANGED and yet,,,, stayed the same,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, yall kids WILL NEVER KNOW WHAT IT WAS LIKE TO HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL CHAPTER LIKE................ 15 FOR THIS SHIT (but like. chapter 15 was different because this chapter used to be like chapter 7? so now everythings moved along so chapter 15 doesnt sound that impressive but trust me it was a different fic back then)

When they fell away, burnt and ruined, she could see Cinder’s bare arms for the first time. The red lines drawn across her skin sloped down the entire length of her arms, circling her elbows, carved into her wrists. They ended right at her hands, ensuring any long-sleeved garment would hide them. Every covered inch of her was filled like a canvas, like abstract art.

lets pause the fight scene for glynda to be gay!!!!! god im. okay look i said this earlier but im so glad we have more cinder like this tbh. the first version was rly lacking w/ cinder content until late-game when the plot sorta. got itself going? but now we’re eye-deep in this content i LOVE cinder i love this WEIRDO who is a HUGE LOSER and IDIOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IM LOVE HER SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And Glynda could not dispel the fear that she had been telling the truth.

and after committing Some Amount In Damages, we’re at the end of the chapter!

okay so i really enjoyed this version SO MUCH MORE. everything abt it was polished and worked together so much better and it really needed the space to breathe in its own chapter. its been horny, gay, intense, hilarious, and way more in one chapter and its SO good this really is PEAK offal hunt!!!!!!!!!!!! good job diesel and kc but im still going to murder you both,

[highpriestessbriyanna-blog]

Khadgar’s Life After Karazhan - The Abridged Version.

So there was a conversation with @sigurdjarlson.

Part of this is from the conversation, and the rest of it is to fill in what I skipped over.

Khadgar's Life After Karazhan (Abridged Version)

It starts with a... like.. 1-2 week of just successive loss and heartbreak. Khadgar and Lothar kill Medivh. They return to find Stormwind a mess. Llane is assassinated. Taria and Addy (who are apparently now gamecanon) are killed before they reach the docks. Varian watches his home burn while Lothar and Khadgar stare at it like "And we couldn't stop any of it."

Khadgar then gets to watch his home get overrun, and then deal with assholes in Dalaran. And THEN Lothar dies. And then he leads his people across to Draenor and is like "Well this is my life now if I don't kill us first" .... And then he goes home and is like "WHY THE FUCK IS MY HOMETOWN FULL OF FUCKING ZOMBIES?" And realizes that Some Shit happened when he was gone, tries to go to Dalaran and is confused by this giant fucking hole in the ground...

Gets BACK to Dalaran because Varian's like "Oh. um. Yeah. Shit happened. Here, lemme fill you in." And he chills in hiding while Deathwing nukes the world because Deathwing is all like "I WILL REMEMBER YOU" and not in the good way... and then the portal to Draenor changes and he's like "GOD FUCKING DAMMIT ALL I THOUGHT I FIXED THAT MOTHERFUCK....ER.... FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK."

So then he leads ANOTHER fucking expidition over to Draenor and kills off some of the champions to make rings for them, (and later hands over their remains to power someone's artifact weapon), fails to stop Gul'dan from Gul'danning, finds out his bodyguard goes nuts and joins the fucking Legion (which rips his fucking heart out), and then Maeiv being like "I lend you one of my Watchers and she fucking joins the fucking Legion, are you THAT much of a Shit Wizard?!"

And because Maiev is a bitch, he goes and duels Gul'dan and has his ass handed to him on ice (because without that ice block let's face it he'd have been fucking TOAST), and Maiev mocks him s'more and Khadgar's like "Scuse me I need to go copy the awesome move Medivh did last time this happened." and goes to warn Stormwind.... and kind of hopes that the word will trickle over to the Horde because he's a twit.

And then he flies his freaked out ass to Karazhan, finds Dreadlord!Medivh and arcane-nutblasts him out a fucking window (like seriously "YOU FUCKING IMPERSONATE THE ONE PERSON IN THIS WORLD I LOVE AND PRETEND THAT HE'S BACK AND I'M JUST GOING TO NUKE YOUR ASS... fuck I just smashed a window, Medivh's going to kill me..."), and finds out that he's screwed no matter what he does.

So he acts cool by teleporting Dalaran around for a bit and putting gnomes in walls (which was kind of awesome) and according to one guy there's a trail of books still following Dalaran from both moves... and Khadgar then drags us back to Karazhan to find a book in The Library Where We All Learned I SHALL NOT MOVE WHEN FLAME WREATH IS CAST OR THE RAID BLOWS UP or else... meanwhile having us play with constructs while he tries to fuck with wards that he should have paid attention to for the last twenty fucking years but didn't because WTF.

And then things quiet down just enough to find out Karazhan's gone fucky AGAIN, and he goes there, finds Medivh alive and 'well' and has a half-assed emotional breakdown that Medivh half-ignores and then fucks off again, leaving Khadgar to stare at the retreating raven like "FUCKING HELL GET YOUR FUCKING RAVEN ASS BACK HERE WE HAVE FUCKING FOUR DECADES TO CATCH UP ON YOU DICK! WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME YOU WERE BACK?! I HAD NO IDEA WHEN YOU WERE ON THAT FUCKING BALCONY BEFORE I FUCKING LEFT THIS FUCKING TOWER YOU FUCKING... ... oh. right, sorry, Champions, here's a portal back to Dalaran. Go ahead back, I'm going to stand here and scream into the Nether and probably have another mental and emotional breakdown, tell Modera I'll be back by dinner."

And of course there's the Legion ships all pointing their dicks at Dalaran while he has to shoot them down while we clear the beach and he makes bad puns and tries not to let his anger blow up on everyone else.

And then gets his ass kicked out of the Tomb of Sargeras. Again. (Since I first thought that thing in Cathedral was an illusion to distract us - no, they got their asses kicked, probably because Khadgar was exhasuted as fuck and he's only human, and his manapool is deep as fuck but he has a limit dammit)

And then they get into the fucking tomb and Khadgar then throws out Medivh’s last words to him about going through doors instead of closing them - and somehow Medivh didn’t fly down, dig his talons into Khadgar’s shoulder and peck his head all like “WHAT THE FUCK YOUNG TRUST?! WHAT THE FUCK DID I TELL YOU?? FUCKING NOOBLET I TAUGHT YOU BETTER THAN THIS!!!” So because VELEN has more balls than Khadgar, we all go kill KJ and then he’s all like “Well, at least we will have died fighting...” all like “THANK FUCKING GOD I CAN GET SOME FUCKING REST!” BUT NO!!! Illdan pulls out Plot Device and opens a giant fucking hole in the Universe and is like “Portal to Azeroth PLZ.” So he has to dig into the bottom of the little strength he has left to mass teleport like 40 people THROUGH THE FUCKING NETHER back to Azeroth without losing anyone... and he’s then like “Is everyone all right?” And Illdan’s just staring at the sky with this giddy “Holy fuck I’m epic” look and Khadgar is just “..................................” and doesn’t even have the strength of mind to punch the smile off Illidan’s face.

... and now he's like "GOD DAMMIT FUCKING LEGION UP MY ASS CAN'T GET A FCUKING BREAK FOR FUCK'S SAKE THIS IS FINE. EVERYTHING IS FINE I'M ON A SPACE SHIP. ON ARGUS. MY FRIENDS HARDLY TALKED TO ME BUT THIS IS FINE EVERYTHING IS FINE EVERYTHING HAST TO BE FINE I'M FINE SOMEONE KILL ME."

And this is where we stand today.

This is me on talking with Sig and on pain meds. Thank you.

@selarcis @archmage--khadgar @archmage-modera @shadowphoenixrider If you would like to be added to my crack tag @ list let me know.