#it's all I can elucidate right about now anyways | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

dasher85 · 2 years

Text

Elucidation

Alhaitham x reader | y/n | you

Slow burn

Part 1

[ When Alhaitham is pressured by the arranged marriage he refuses to deny his feelings any longer. ]

---------------------------------

[ First Encounter ]

The classroom was filled with students, it was the first week of class and everyone was eager to listen to the first lesson.

Being a normal person, you never actually liked to attend class. The lesson doesn't really interest you but you're still enrolled as a legal scholar just because of your parent's eagerness.

Your slender fingers play around with the pencil, spinning it around on repeat because you were too lazy to write down notes. As mindless as you were, your fingers slipped and the pencil went on flying away from your grasp.

"Hmm??" A person seated by your left sounded in response and you already knew your pencil must've landed there. You quickly looked towards the person thinking the worst but unexpectedly he has caught the pencil with his right hand. He was still holding his book with his left hand.

"Yours?" He calmly spoke and casually handed the pencil after you nodded with an apologetic smile. You were just glad he wasn't making too much of a fuss out of it knowing that technically it's still your fault for being careless.

"Sorry." You took it and he nodded once, not even the least bothered.

[ Second conversation ]

You barely talk in class, usually minding your own business but at least you still have a friend to hang out with especially during research hours or lunch break. Needless to say your studies have been doing quite well although you didn't actually put in that much effort.

"I have assigned every student with their research partners. Everyone can check it after class". The professor pinned the name list on the pin-it board. The students who were seated in front were already squinting their eyes to check their research partners, some were quite enthusiastic while some were resigned with their fate.

A small smile spread across your face feeling entertained by their expressions. You haven't checked your name but you didn't think too much about it. As long as your research partner is willing to do their part then it's all good.

Your only friend who was seated at the second row, closer to the front turned to look at you. She makes a sad face indicating that you both weren't partnered with each other. You shrugged and indicated that it was alright and nothing much can be done anyways.

After class, you pack your things and finally check your name on the name list.

'Topic: Ancient ruins - Alhaitham , Y/n'

You read the name list twice but for sure your eyes weren't seeing it wrong. Truthfully that name rings a slight worry in your mind.

'I don't know who's that?? It would be embarrassing to not recognize all the classmates by now' you thought. You're slightly frantic not because of who the person is but you didn't know who that person is. It's been two months and you haven't actually memorized all of your classmates' names. You're familiar with how they look but not their names.

"... Alhaitham…"

You could only make out the name being called by another student and you quickly turn your head just to see the guy who sat next to your left side. The tall blonde student was talking to him and just like that you knew who your research partner was.

'At least he's not seated too far' you thought, thinking it's only convenient if there's anything to discuss during class hours.

The next day, he hands you a piece of paper where he wrote a list of research sites to go to and to your distaste it's all in the desert.

"There's one ancient ruin in the rainforest. I can't recall its name but it's near. Are you not interested in going there instead?"

"Where is it exactly?"

"I think it was in our textbook, page 543?"

Without much thought he instantly pulled out his textbook and sure enough he found the one you mentioned.

"Alright."

You smiled, feeling better that it wasn't too far and he agreed to conduct the research there. The way he doesn't talk much really makes things easy for you.

[ Research Duo ]

"Do we need to go deeper? The steps don't seem in a good condition" you quickly suggested before he made another step further inside the ruins.

Veins and leaves were covering the walls of the ruins. Moss covered the path, the air smelled musty and the chirping of birds couldn't be heard anymore. If anything it feels a little eerie to stay any longer.

"Scared? It was you who suggested this place"

"Fine, we'll do as you like"

You didn't even bother to start an argument with him. If he's too confident about going inside the ruins then so be it. After all, it's not you who's leading the way first.

'How annoying' you couldn't help but secretly thought about him but followed him close behind anyways.

He then found a few ancient symbols behind the vines as he took a knife to clear it away. You then took a picture of it and jotted down a few notes. It went on like this for a few hours until there was more research data than what you actually need in that research report. The man suggested taking a few more symbols before calling it a day and you casually agreed.

As the both of you were descending another flight of steps, one step from where you placed your foot suddenly became loose. In those short seconds you had lost your balance and there was nothing to hold on to.

You gasp in panic, although your research partner was quick to notice and he tried to catch your body from falling, he was not fast enough.

[ Consequences ]

"Research partner, what else do we need to write in the report, let me at least draft it for you."

You spoke genuinely feeling troubled that you barely were able to contribute with the research report.

The only visitor seated at the side of your bed shook his head in refusal. Although his facial expression was just as calm it was evident that he wasn't going to hand you any of the paper materials.

"I'll bring the full report for you to read tomorrow."

"I can still write…" The truth was it's painful if you write or move your right wrist. The force you've taken to stop your body from slamming the floor has hurt both of your hands. At least your right hand is still functional but your right it's considered fractured. The doctor insisted that you'll need a few weeks rest with minimal hand movements, especially not writing.

"Are you not using your brain?"

There weren't many times when you actually had a conversation with this man but today you don't feel like having another anymore.

You nodded and slowly but naturally went back inside the hospital covers, lying on your right side facing the white painted wall. You’re just glad he only lets you be.

The next day, your parents visited along with your few friends. It feels amazingly better to see them with all smiles. After two hours they finally left, leaving a basket of fruits and a book for you to read. The type of novel book that you like. Credit to your friend for knowing your favorites.

Later in the evening, as your research partner said he has bought you the thick stack of papers. You're not sure how he managed to write this much when it's just him who does the work. It gives you much guilt to make him do all of this.

Nonetheless, you read each page one by one. You had promised yourself not to say any word to him unless it's necessary but it seems there are things that are worth mentioning.

It did take you an hour to read every page and you finally concluded that there are things to be added. At least that's what your opinion is saying.

"Maybe we can add the text from page, what was that, right… page 235 & 247 for this part"

You went on suggesting the pages that need to be added based on your knowledge from the textbook and a few other research papers as a reference.

"But it's okay if you don't want to add it, we still have time. I can slowly add it myself later"

He hasn't spoken anything ever since his arrival, as he carefully took hold of the papers from your hand. Just like that, he gave you a slight nod and exited the room.

You have no idea if he accepted your suggestions or simply disagreeing? But he didn't take any notes all the while you spoke of the pages and numbers, surely he wouldn't be able to remember all of that. The way he looked at you didn't actually discern any emotions aside from simply saying he was taking his leave.

'Why did I get such a weird research partner? Is he dejected that I didn't simply say the things he wrote weren't perfect?' you question yourself but didn't dwell too much into that before continuing with reading.

Six days later, during the weekend your research partner came knocking on the door before entering the hospital room.

You slightly raised your head to acknowledge who it was and went on reading with your book after seeing him closing the door.

He stood by the side of your bed for a few seconds as if checking your condition before taking a chair nearby. He then hands you the stack of research papers. It seems to be thicker compared to days prior.

You finally placed down the novel book and read the boring pages of research once more. Turns out he has added everything that you've suggested. It surprises you that he remembers it all too well.

After checking each detail you nodded approvingly of the whole research report before handing it back to him. If you remember it correctly, the research report submission would be next week and if he were to submit it right now, there wouldn't be any problems at all.

The both of you didn't exchange any words and you didn't try either. You believed nodding with a smile would already be enough to tell him that the research report was all good, so just like that you continued with the novel in your hand.

You also didn't bother to tell him that it was alright to mention to the professor that you couldn't contribute much in the research. After all, you never were interested in being a scholar in the first place. If your parents still insisted on becoming one, you didn't mind repeating the year. Needless to say, your thoughts didn't necessarily need to be spoken out especially to this person because you've accepted every possible outcome.

If anything you're just glad he didn't need to visit the hospital anymore just solely for the research report. Firstly it's such a hassle for him and secondly you didn't quite enjoy his company ever since the day he indirectly mentioned that you were acting stupid just because you want to help out.

He finally stood up.

'Finally! he's leaving' you secretly cheered, feeling a little better.

"Get well soon"

You nodded with a small smile, and was about to literally continue with the book you were reading, making no such effort to show much gratitude.

"I'll visit you tomorrow. See ya" he suddenly adds and you couldn't help but feel disappointed. Of all things, you really thought this was his last visit. Somehow if only your hands could magically instantly heal itself it would be better.

-----------------------

A/N: Yet again another slow burn couple XD but this one would be shorter because in celebration for his banner release.

All parts are already on schedule btw. So stay tuned...

#alhaitham #genshin impact #genshin impact alhaitham #alhaitham x reader

253 notes · View notes

kyogre-blue · 4 days

Text

In a big rush, I've caught up to RDCH manhwa, up to chapter 92.

There's a lot that happened. As always, the pace is breakneck, haha. Anyway, there's a few points I wanted to note.

First, I appreciate the respect for just punching someone in the face. This is why I respect SQH the most as Lostbelt King, because at the end of LB3, they go to punch it out with Chaldea. Here, in chapter 85, Hugo punches it out with Taurus and it's great. And then, Libra also eventually resorts to just directly punching Lee Geon, which is hilarious.

Speaking of Libra, she's done a bang up job as a villain. Very funny that she stripped at the end to the same level as Lee Geon. Even her top! In general, I feel like... this manhwa really has a foot fetish. The guys always lose their shirts, sure, but they also lose everything below the knee too, only keeping their hulk modesty shorts. But you also get Yooha losing her boots, while her jeans are otherwise fine, so it feels like they just really wanted to get her barefoot lol (Speaking of Yooha, I wonder if they're going to circle back to the evil god in her arms, or if this is it and it'll be considered that she's gotten control of it.)

Speaking of Hugo, the first couple chapters after the manhwa restarted were quite rough, since it was more flashbacks of Suffering(tm). Hugo really lives a different genre than everyone else sometimes, rip. I do like how he goes wild against Taurus. He and Lee Geon are very similar sometimes. They can have a similar mean sense of humor, and occasionally Hugo enjoys battle in a similar way.

There were also some moments for Yooha, Steven, Kevin... feels like a fairly okay support cast, which I like. Though of course, Lee Geon is the only useful one, haha

That said, the big ending for the Libra arc felt pretty cohesive. I can't really complain about the direction.

There are several interesting points that were elucidated. First, Lee Geon's moral compass is sometimes a bit hard to pin down, but he pretty directly states what he is opposed to: disregarding "the safety of others." Everything else is whatever, but people shouldn't be put in danger meaninglessly.

(In my fanfic concept development, this would mean... you can tell he loses it if he puts innocent people in danger. But for additional consideration, Lee Geon is not at all shy about going to down on anyone who crosses him and directly threatens murder in the novel. So you could say him losing it would come from the direction of starting to see innocent people as having wronged him. Hehehe)

Second, there's an interesting... hm, undercurrent? that is introduced here. Steven says that he is willing to sacrifice "everything Leo has accumulated" because otherwise humanity will lose "everything they've accumulated" in bold text. At the same time, Libra tries to claim that this world belongs to the divine gods, while "Baron Helmet" said the same for the unknown civilization when they invaded. There's this concept of accumulating resources or taking them by force.

Third, they also bring up several times that "the weak don't even get the right to choose" and "only the strong get to ask questions," which... is certainly in line with a battle series, but... yeah. Yooha does angle Leo's ideal of the strong survive as "the strong have a duty to protect the weak," and in a sense, all the weak people "choose" Lee Geon, which you can interpret as flashback Steven being wrong. But still... it's all good to say that Ophiuchus respects those who are willing to put everything on the line to become stronger, but most people simply do not have the necessary potential or opportunity. All they can do is choose who to pray to, but this assumes that there is a good choice to begin with. It's all a kind of concept that I don't really like, though I won't say that it's incoherent or anything.

Anyway, all that said, the last chapter for now is really something. Ah, Lee Geon making that face, damn... We finally see him get a bit stripped down emotionally. Yes, give me that backstory to add to my Lee Geon microwave spinning.

#reading disaster class hero

6 notes · View notes

gold3nladybug · 1 year

Text

* Gently places a grenade inside of a wasp’s nest *

Alright, so now that that’s out of the way, lets talk. I first read Worm in, oh, around 2014 when I was stuck in a city I didn’t live in with nothing to do for the better part of a week because all my plans had collapsed. I found it by googling something like “original superhero fiction”. I read it again in the last few years, and then read Ward. I say this because it means I read both pieces as complete works, and never engaged with them in progress - I didn’t stop to read the comments or even really spend any time in the fan community until quite recently, so I didn’t really have a handle on how other people were reacting to the text. Which means that I’m having an opinion about something that I’ve seen other people talking about in the parahuman tags, and I'm about to make that our problem together - that is to say, describing Victoria Dallon as a Cop. And, to be fair, that’s a pretty sensible thing to saddle her with; she do be upholding unjust power structures for the benefit of the strong at the expense of the weak. Its just that she also, sometimes, upholds unjust power structures for the benefit of the weak at the expense of the strong. Or the benefit of the strong at the expense of the strong. Or the benefit of the weak at the expense of the weak.

My favourite thing about Victoria Dallon, as of her stint as the protagonist of Ward, is that her only guiding Moral Principle is “I will do whatever I want, and I will justify to myself that it was the right thing to do” and that is so much more fun than just being cop-brained. Do what is Right (as defined by Vicky’s parliament of Herself, Herself but a Kid, Herself but a Wise Mentor Figure, Herself but a Nerd and Herself but Not Fucked Up) unless she doesn’t want to. Do what is Legal unless she doesn’t want to. Do whatever she wants that she wants to. She gets first pick on whatever the moral high ground is, because wherever she’s standing is the moral high ground - even if she’s just making the Tough Decision in a Bad Situation with No Good Outcome, she gets to place herself in a position of control and good judgment. And that’s a fascinating place to shove your protagonist, because it elucidates a lot of the inconsistencies in how Vicky views the world - . How can putting “criminals” in prison be imperative if Rain and Ashley going to prison is unbearably stupid? Vicky, ultimately, gets to square away the inconsistencies in her ethical axioms, because she doesn’t let them get in the way of her doing/feeling what she wants.

Which is a great flaw for a protagonist to have - the text even gestures at it when we get a quick look from The Fragile One’s perspective, because Vicky’s Genocide Alien Piece thinks its absolutely rad that Victoria will do anything to get her way and justify it to herself the whole time since that might make it possible for them to take over the world together and crush it beneath a forcefielded boot. Its a really natural flaw for Vicky to have, as well, because its all about manifesting control - she has to be right, she has to set her own path, because otherwise someone else could be setting it for her and that’s not something she can accept or go back to. Vicky’s not a Cop because she’s, in some way, better than that - she’s not. Its just that I feel like describing someone as a Cop implies that they’re following some kind of code, defending some kind of institution, part of some kind of group that is acting in its own interests or the interests of its superiors. Victoria might seem like she's doing that, but its incidental - the only one or only thing that she's accountable to is herself, and even then only if its convenient. (Where this all breaks down, of course, is that Wildblow decided at some point that Vicky actually was just right about everything which takes some of the wind out of my sails)

Anyway, I just think she's neat.

#Worm #Ward #Parahumans #Victoria Dallon #Antares #Ward would be so good if it was good #Also I didn't know March died/Foil and Vista lived until the latter two started showing up again later #Because I don't go into the parahumans comment section #and you couldn't pay me to start

64 notes · View notes

arodrwho · 3 months

Text

dw liveblog

oh that's fun!

hey why is the child still here? get him out of there he is like 14

hey ruby you do kind of have bigger things to worry about. like i assume theyre connected bc yall keep telling us theyre connected but yknow

"i have to hope birds will sing again. there will be birds" those are cool last words. wouldve had more punch without the repetition of "there will be birds" imo but whatever. u can't hope for maximum eloquence & emotion when ur about to die

:( bye kate

oh my god. cherry and carla within seconds of each other

i assume they'll all be back but

"you've got worse problems" THANK you

HUH??? WHAT'S UP WITH THE TARDIS INTERIOR. a) that's not THEIR interior, and b) it's small!!!!!!!!

holy shit.

"and why am i still alive"

"i am an extinction event"

fffascinating

"this feeling you are feeling right now, this doubt, don't you feel so alive?"

lot of banger lines in this

"it's a remembered tardis, bits and pieces of every tardis that ever was, held in place by hopes and wishes and luck" oh i love that very much

!! 73 yards

holy shit

i do love that fifteen just screams sometimes

time skip? or something?

so we assume the baby is ruby?

a metal spoon. is there some meaning to this that i should know about?

oh.

:( if mel forgot then she's going to die soon yeah?

well back up why did. oh she's adopted. thats why her mum died first. duh. the death wave is using genetics. + it isn't an always thing, just a sometimes thing

:( mel

:(( nooooo u cant tell mel

<3 kiss the tardis

pls why don't u notice :( i wanted u to notice :(

she's trying so hard :((

what do you MEAN she's already dead

NO ruby don'ttttt

is it your own name? or?

oh i love you so much

oh the rope. THE GLOVE!!

oh you KNEW!

oh whistle!

!!! alive!

and a very pretty effect too!

thank god ruby's mum and grandmother are alive

alright but who the fuck is mrs flood though

what the fuck were her plans

oh the baby is alive

i was waiting for you to say skaro

what u mean u have to become a monster

is it NOW when u bring back skaro, or do u mean what u have to do with - yeah with suktekh

well that's one way to do it

i am so glad her birth mother ended up a normal person

ruby i really think you should leave her alone

like you have the right to seek her out, but i don't think you should

that said that's mostly because i wouldn't, personally, and my situation was very different from hers

well. sure. sometimes it works out like that

oh that's disgusting

"my real mum" go fuck yourself

go fuck yourself

absolutely go fuck yourself

nah man i hate everything about how this was handled, actually

i was willing to put up with the parts i didn't like, because ruby had never devalued her mum before, but she just did that and now i want to stab her

who the fuck are you, though. iris wildthyme? the master? the rani? some other motherfucker? elaborate and elucidate.

like u have to be some other motherfucker bc of the weird ominous shift u've been saying but

WHO.

ANYWAY. i hope there is some kind of storytelling bullshit at play that i can twist and manipulate so i can believe ruby's story didn't actually end that way bc i hate it and it sucks

#dr who #to conclude i'm angy #and i am going to throw ruby in the sea bout it #it is the only solution #ugh.#dw spoilers

2 notes · View notes

biffhofosho · 1 year

Text

Prisoner to Temptation | Chapter Thirteen

Word Count: 8.4k

A/N: I feel like we’re missing a few things... Hm... Perhaps this conclusion may elucidate them. After all, I promised you a fairytale ending. Let’s see if I can deliver, yes?

Cvr | 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08 | 09 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | Ep

Neither Naran nor Hyungwon were morning people, but as she stared into her husband's chocolate eyes, she thought he looked most breathtaking in morning light. Of course, her view might have been colored by the fact that he was looking up at her over the hill of her breast, his lips flushed around her nipple as his tongue swirled deftly within the cavern of his mouth. She forked her hand back through his silky bangs, and for a second, he stole those beautiful eyes from her as his lids shuttered under her adoration.

“Finally awake,” said Hyungwon as he came up for breath. “I’ve been helping myself to you for a while now.”

“Mm, is that why my whole body is already shivering?”

He smiled and kissed her breast again before he said, “Another minute, and I was just going to slip inside you anyway.”

“What a pretty thought,” murmured Naran as she brushed his hair again.

“Let’s make it a reality then, shall we.”

The prince’s hands charted across every bit of flesh with a strange sort of dedication. With every pass of his questing fingers, Naran felt more and more precious—and more and more keyed up. Her thighs rubbed together under the covers so much that he had to still her with a rough grip.

“I thought you were going to take me,” she whined.

“And I will, I swear it, but first, what’s this?” asked Hyungwon curiously as he fondled the underside of her breast.

Naran shot up on her elbows, concern suddenly in her voice. “What’s what?”

“Here. Right here. I haven’t kissed this spot before.”

Her husband pressed his lips to the sensitive, neglected skin there, and the princess fell back to her pillow with a groan. “You’re such a tease.”

“Hardly. I deliver, don’t I?”

Naran scowled at him. “Not always.”

Hyungwon’s jaw dropped. “When did I not?”

“After our picnic?”

“Ah, yes,” he said with a blush before he hid his face in her chest. “I had forgotten.”

“Well, I most certainly did not.”

Hyungwon eased up her body then, his skin caressing hers the entire way until his mouth hovered at her own. He looked down at his wife apologetically before he glossed his lips along the arc of her cheekbone. “Shall I help you forget then, darling?”

“I don’t know if I can forget,” she challenged. “It was devastating.”

“Then I shall make up for it all day today. I’ll deny you nothing, princess.”

“Hyungwon, we hardly left our room yesterday. Is that where today is headed as well?” she observed with a chuckle.

“I was going to propose the hot springs, but it depends on whether you keep giving me a hard time. We may not leave this bed.”

Naran fisted his straining length then and Hyungwon grunted. With a purr, she replied, “Mm, yes, it does seem to be unfairly hard. We must do something about it first then because my muscles are rather sore and begging for a soak.”

“Yes, we must, though I confess I have ulterior motives. I have many things I want to do to you in the springs. You have no idea how I suffered the last time we were there.”

“Oh, I think I do.” Naran put her lips to her husband’s ear to whisper, “I fantasized about riding you in those pools until we both came undone. I couldn’t stop thinking about it, so much so that I nearly straddled your lap then and there. My need for you was so overpowering that when we came home, you know what I did, my prince?”

“What?” Hyungwon asked breathlessly.

“I touched myself as I thought about you.”

The prince jerked back, his eyes pools of their own, only his were black and swirling with devilry. “You really shouldn’t provoke me like that this early, my darling.”

“Whoops,” Naran teased with a cheeky grin that he was quick to kiss away.

His mischievous tongue roved about hers, sampling her despite their stale mouths. It was raw and warm and comforting in its familiarity. When Hyungwon pulled back, she smiled up at him. Her hand cupped his cheek so she could rub her thumb over the plush flesh there.

“So,” she drawled, “are you going to let your wife have her way, sir?”

“That depends.”

“On what?”

“On whether or not she shows me how she touched herself.”

“Hyungwon,” Naran whined, “I can’t wait for you that long. I need you inside me too badly.”

To underscore her point, she bucked upward, and the prince sighed contentedly. “See, how could I ever deny you again when you speak so prettily to me. Very well, once we get home tonight, you will show me. Swear it.”

“I swear! So, please, do not make me wait anymore. Take me. Make me yours again and again.”

Hyungwon wasted no time slipping a finger between her folds to prime her needy sex, not that he had his work cut out for him. Even in sleep, her body had beckoned him, and he found her already soaked with longing for him.

They did not need words anymore to know what the other craved. By now, their bodies were so finely tuned to one another that pleasure came as second nature, so when Hyungwon pushed her shoulder up to roll her onto her side, Naran followed eagerly.

She waited breathlessly, her whole body a lightning rod begging for his electricity, and when the back of his fingers ghosted down her arm, she shivered, a tremulous moan escaping her throat. His body conformed to hers, his knees folded into the back of hers, his chest to her spine, and his manhood aching against the swell of her backside. He was hot all over, but the shape of his cock was a firebrand on her skin. Her eyes fluttered shut at her daily reminder of how his want for her never waned.

Hyungwon’s lips came next, planted as they’d become accustomed to the side of her neck. For a moment, Naran was so distracted by the lave of his tongue down her throat that she missed him lifting her top leg and easing it back over his hip.

Her muscles stretched to the new angle, and at the way her seam parted with the exposure, she gasped. Hyungwon ran his fingertips up from her knee, over her thigh, to the crest of her sex, and as he stroked her slit, he sighed.

“So eager,” he murmured and kissed her throat again.

All Naran could do was pant. She was eager. Now that she had invited her husband into her heart, she wasn’t going to pretend anymore that she was anything but.

Hyungwon slipped into her heat with a groan, his hand pressing into her soft belly. “Always so tight for me, my darling.”

“Mm, you should wake me like this every day,” she murmured.

“Nothing would make me happier. Shall we start with soft and slow, like this?”

His shaft dragged along her walls, the side angle giving Naran a sense of fullness that she hadn’t anticipated. She could feel every part of him in this position, especially the way her core parted with every intrusion and then begged for his return as he pulled out to the head of his cock.

“Put it back, put it back!” she begged when he had almost escaped.

Hyungwon kissed along her jaw, and Naran could feel his smile at her desperation. He nibbled at the neglected skin there as he teased, “I love when you get like this.”

He pressed in hard and fast to his hilt, and the air rushed out of her. She clawed at her husband’s hand as she held on against the tidal wave of relief she experienced when he was fully immersed within her.

“I could stay like this forever,” he whispered.

“Then stay like this,” she echoed as her hips swirled in his lap. The way his member stirred her insides left Naran’s head fuzzy.

“We’ll never make it to dinner then,” Hyungwon chuckled.

“Who cares.”

“They’re preparing your mutton dumplings though. I know how long you’ve been waiting for those.”

“They’ll reheat nicely,” Naran said dismissively and squirmed in his grasp to urge him on. “I just want you today.”

Hyungwon thrust lazily between her thighs as he kissed every part of her he could reach. His hands could afford to rove much more greedily though, so they wandered up from pinching her nipples to lightly ringing her throat.

“My beautiful wife,” he whispered at her ear. “Can’t get enough of you.”

“Never stop…” Naran begged.

Her eyes had already rolled back in her head as Hyungwon’s strokes picked up speed. He pulled her back roughly against him, so her body now draped over his like a blanket while he plowed into her from below rather than just from behind. Her head rested in the crook of his neck and her back warmed his chest, but her own was naked and exposed, giving him free rein to grope her breast with one hand while playing with her core with the other.

Hyungwon grunted harder and harder next to her ear as he hurtled them faster toward their finish line. For her part, Naran grew more and more vocal. Her hand joined his on her chest while the other reached back and tugged on his sweaty locks. His diligent attentions only faltered when he wet the fingers teasing her hill with his tongue, only to put them right back with furious determination.

Just as she was about to unleash all over his manhood, there was a knock at the door.

“Ignore it,” Hyungwon commanded as he stubbornly continued his thrusts.

Another knock preceded an awkward but familiar “Your Highness.”

“Go away, damn you,” groaned the prince.

“Your Highness, my sincerest apologies, but I come bearing an urgent message from His Majesty the Emperor.”

This time, Hyungwon outright snarled as he pulled out unsatisfied. Naran crumpled in on herself with a whimper bordering on actual tears.

“Ah! I am so sorry, my sweet, but don't even think of moving,” the prince ordered as he tugged on his robe and tossed a blanket over her.

Hyungwon kept the door tight to his face as he hissed at his valet, “What couldn’t wait another hour, Hansol?”

“For you, Your Grace,” the red-faced valet replied as he passed a sealed envelope through the crack in the door.

The prince shut it immediately on his friend and leapt back toward the bed, shucking off his robe in an instant.

“What did the letter say?” Naran asked, but her husband simply chucked the envelope to the floor as he hovered over her.

“Who cares? It can wait until after I’ve made you come undone all over my cock, you wild thing.”

“Hyungwon—”

He kissed her then through her incredulous giggles until they became soft moans and her hands wrapped around his neck.

In a single motion, he was inside her again and working her back into her frenzy. Her thwarted release burned a thousand times more urgently, especially since she could ogle her husband now. She loved seeing Hyungwon fully exposed for her—every muscle, every mole, every dip and divot of his body on display for her appreciation. She loved the way his body rolled as he refined his strokes to fill her just the way she liked—not frantic yet but thorough, leaving no part of her walls untouched. She loved the way he sucked in his bottom lip and furrowed his brow as he gave her his all. She loved that whenever she touched him, he melted into her hand and stared at her with such grateful eyes.

Why had she ever fought him? This was always inevitable. He was always inevitable. And she loved it.

“You’re squeezing me so tightly,” Hyungwon grunted.

“Can’t help it…”

He kissed her again, and as he did, his hips slowed. Normally, Naran would have whined and bucked and begged for more, but kissing him so deeply while sheltering his length inside her felt like nothing else in the world. If his arms weren’t wrapped around her, she might have floated away.

“Sorry,” he said as he pulled back and drove emphatically into her. “No more distractions, I promise.”

Hyungwon returned to rubbing her just the way she liked—fast and relentless, favoring that one extra-sensitive spot he’d discovered made her extra vocal—and as her bud stiffened, her walls contracted, and the next thing Naran knew, her eyes opened to a shower of little black stars raining all over her electrified skin. She fell limp to the bed, useless except to receive her husband’s first release of the day, which came a minute later along with a strangled cry of her name.

The prince tumbled to the side, his hands falling to his heaving chest while his member twitched and sagged gradually toward his thigh, still throbbing and adorned with a sloppy white crown.

Together, they caught their breath as their hands found one another in the sheets. Hyungwon squeezed hers, and Naran’s head lolled toward him.

“So, you changed your mind then? Shall we just stay in bed all day?” he suggested.

“Perhaps fresh air would do us some good. I’m developing an unhealthy addiction to your body.”

“Lucky me,” the prince gloated.

“I suppose you did promise the hot springs, and I promised you something after. Besides, you still haven’t opened your letter, you devil.”

“I don’t care what it says. It’s just a pointless reason to put an end to my time with you, and I’m not interested.”

“You’re impossible,” Naran scolded and moved to hop out of the bed before her husband’s arms fastened around her waist and threw her back to the mattress to her playful yelp. “Hyungwon! It could be important.”

“Not as important as you are, little star.” He kissed her nose then, but she waved him off.

“There’s no point in sweet-talking me,” she insisted, though she could feel the color at her chest and throat. “What if something’s happened?”

Hyungwon groaned and flopped onto his back. “Since when did you become the dutiful one between the two of us?”

Grumbling all the way, the prince scooped up the letter and ripped open the seal to read his father’s handwriting. A snarl bubbled up from the back of his throat before he tossed the letter back to the floor and collapsed to the bed again.

“And?” pressed Naran.

“Pointless, just like I said,” he groused. “My father wants us to return immediately to the palace. He says we shouldn’t have taken off without notice. Blah blah blah, I have offended Champa irrevocably yet again.”

Naran shot up to glare at her husband. “You didn’t tell them we were leaving? Are you insane?”

“It wasn’t important at the time. I was worried I was losing you. All rational thought had left me.”

The princess leaned over him and caressed his face before she kissed him briefly. If the prince thought he might win, that hope was dashed a second later.

“Hyungwon, we must go back.”

“Oh, must we?” he parroted with a chuckle. “The only thing we must do is dirty these sheets one more time.”

“You’re absolutely hopeless.”

He propped his cheek on his hand as he looked at his wife with stars in his eyes. “When it comes to you, absolutely.”

But at her firm glower, Hyungwon pulled back with an odd somber look in his eye.

“What’s wrong?” Naran probed, genuinely worried.

“It’s ridiculous, but… I’m afraid…”

She cocked an eyebrow. “Afraid of what? The Emperor?”

Hyungwon shook his head lightly. It took him a long moment and a deep breath, but finally, he confessed, “I'm afraid things will change between us when we get back to the palace.”

Naran’s eyes widened. With her newly unburdened heart, her first inclination was to laugh, but slowly, she realized that what he was afraid of was exactly what she was afraid of. Back at the palace, there were servants with whom he'd had a past and a ruthless father determined to influence his son's future. There were impediments and obligations and games of Court.

Here at the villa, the world could not have been simpler. In those rare occasions when they came up for air, the couple was always side-by-side, walking the grounds hand-in-hand or nestled together in shadowy corners away from prying eyes. It was like some beautiful dream. They were simply Hyungwon and Naran, newlyweds. There were no other titles or ceremonies other than those sought passionately between a husband and wife.

Back at the palace…

Naran clutched her husband's hand between both of hers so she could kiss each of his fingertips, savoring, to her surprise, a bit of herself on his skin. “Things will be different, but it doesn’t have to be different between us. I will not back down anymore. Let us share all our fears with one another now. I want to hear them and I want to share my own.”

At this, Hyungwon perked. “What are yours?”

“I’m afraid the Emperor will coerce you into other marriages.”

The prince set his jaw in a stiff line. “I am wiser now. I see through his schemes, and I will not let him manipulate my feelings for you anymore.”

“Even without that, I’m not the only one at the palace with hopes of staying by your side. I’m afraid you won’t be all mine anymore.”

Hyungwon pressed his forehead to hers so he could garner all her attention. “I’ll always be yours and yours alone.”

Naran beamed. “And I am yours.”

“We understand each other at last.”

“Mm, at long last. So now, if that’s settled, we best give your father some small trinket to appease him since he cannot toy with us any way he sees fit anymore.”

“If we must…”

“We must, my husband.”

At last, Hyungwon agreed, and since their trip had been abrupt and light on supplies in the first place, it was easy to pack though it was much harder to leave. From their shared seat in their carriage, the couple looked back on the villa with wistful eyes. As sorry as Naran was to leave, at least she was leaving with more pieces of herself than which she arrived.

“Aw, I wanted to go to those hot springs one last time,” she lamented as they trundled down the mountainside.

Hyungwon sighed in agreement, but then he kissed the top of her head as it rested against his shoulder. “Our very pretty plans might have been delayed, but it’s nothing a shared bathtub and some very hot water can’t fix. I’ll see to it as soon as we’re home. After all, you did swear a promise to me, did you not, my darling?”

Hyungwon guided her hand to her lap and pressed her fingers against her sex. Naran’s breath hitched as she whispered, “I suppose I did.”

“Then this trip can’t go fast enough.”

Things were much different this ride, perhaps more so than any other the couple had shared. Despite how eager they were to live up to all their romantic promises, the lazy way the road passed underneath them suited the princess just as well. With all the sleep she’d lost out on these past few days of bliss, it was easy to fall asleep on her husband. More than once, she woke with his coat under her head in his lap and his hands on her hip, and other times, their roles reversed. In some ways, those were her favorite moments, where Hyungwon’s head rested in her lap and she could hold him as tenderly as she held him in her heart now. It was a languid sort of heaven, and as far as she was concerned, it could take as long as it wished.

It was late in the afternoon when they pulled over on the shoulder next to a scenic plateau overlooking the river. There, with the sinking sun daubing the water tangerine and apricot, they laid out a blanket and decorated it with a restorative spread of dishes.

“This is a lot of food,” said Hyungwon with a hum. “Hansol, please join us.”

Both the princess and the valet were stunned by the prince’s offer, but they hurried to oblige. As the couple cozied up on their cushions and their companion took a seat at the far end, they divvied up the food while Hansol poured tea. Conversation passed pleasantly between the three of them as though they were all old friends with no status at all. It was everything Naran had always dreamed of for herself.

With her eyes closed, she leaned against Hyungwon to relish the first bite of her mutton dumpling at long last.

“Let’s just stay here,” she said with her head on her husband’s shoulder.

“Mmpf” was all the prince answered, and when she looked up questioningly at him, she found his cheeks puffed to comical proportions as he chomped between gasps.

Naran narrowed her eyes even as she laughed at him. “Did you shove that whole thing in in one bite?”

“Mm-mmpf.”

“I take it they’re tastier than you expected?”

“Mm-hmpf.”

“I’m happy that you like them. These taste just like home. Thank you, Wonnie,” she said with a smile on her face. She put her head back on his shoulder as she finished off the other half of her dumpling.

Naran felt her husband shift, and when she glanced back up, she found him staring at her with his silly, slack-jawed smile.

“What?” she asked.

“You gave me a nickname.”

The princess bit her lip and heated up. “I guess I did… Is that okay? Do you like it?”

“Of course, I do. I love you.”

Slowly, Naran sat upright. She opened her mouth to speak, but whatever she thought to say got caught in her throat instead. She tried again, and this time she found but a single word.

“What?”

“What?” Hyungwon parroted back, amused.

“What did you just say?”

“I love you?” The prince raised an eyebrow. “Why are you looking at me with such surprise? I've said it a thousand times.”

“You've never said it,” she asserted.

His head cocked as he scanned his memories. “Oh? Hm. I guess I've just gotten so used to saying it in my head that I assumed I had said it out loud already.”

His honesty was effortless and beautiful and so very simple. Just like Hyungwon.

Naran was too stunned to do anything other than nod. She ate her dumplings, but the flavor had changed. All things considered, they tasted rather bland now. Instead, she savored the taste of her husband’s words over and over again.

I love you.

They were so rich, almost too delicious to be sampled. Even thinking about them made her feel a little tipsy, and more than once, her grip tightened around her husband’s arm as though he were the only thing that could keep her upright.

For a long while afterward, Naran didn’t speak. She ate and drank and watched the sun dip below the mountains as the water turned a shimmering indigo. Whenever Hyungwon would look at her, she would stare dopily back at him with moon eyes and an awestruck smile, which he never failed to kiss.

They packed things up and returned to the road to finish their ride in darkness, and this time, when they overnighted at inns along the way, the royal couple shared a room and always made the most of it, though they took extra pains to keep their voices down out of courtesy for their hosts. It was the one thing that Naran looked forward to about returning to the palace. It was torture keeping her voice down when he was inside her.

The rest of their week-long trip passed this way, with Hyungwon’s hand on his wife’s thigh or their lips on each other’s. From time to time, the princess felt a little foolish, for she simply could not keep her hands to herself any longer. When silence found them in between their mischief, all Naran could think about were those three little words like the kiss of raindrops on her skin. They clung to her like glitter, and when at last they pulled back up to the palace, it felt like everyone could see it, too, the way she sparkled with them now.

Magda was there to greet her lady when the carriage pulled into the palace, and the moment the door flung open, the worry lines on the attendant’s face melted into warm smile lines. The prince emerged from the carriage first to help his princess out, and as soon as Naran’s feet hit the ground, she scampered to her friend’s side.

“Welcome home, Your Highnesses,” said Magda with a deep bow. “It is so wonderful to have you back at Changdeokgung, and in such health and lively spirits.”

“It is very good to see you, Magda,” answered the prince with a robust smile for his biggest fan.

“I trust you had an easy trip?”

“Easiest of my life,” he said. “Have you seen the Empress around?”

“Why, yes. I dare say Her Majesty has hardly sat still these three weeks, and that is very out of character for a lady so composed.”

At this, Hyungwon paused. “Is she in good health?”

“Oh, yes, Your Highness,” Magda assured. “I apologize. I did not mean to worry you. She is very well, simply anxious for your safe return, as was I. It has been very quiet with no news from Chungju.”

The attendant bowed again and risked a glance at her lady, who managed a quick nod for her friend. Their understanding that all was well was instantaneous, and Magda released a long, quiet breath.

“Last I saw Her Majesty,” continued the older woman, “she was wandering the halls near the Throne Room. She’s been very much looking forward to your return, so I would not be surprised if she has not already spied you and is headed your way.”

Hyungwon looked to his wife and said, “Shall we go to the Empress then?”

Naran looked back at the prince with big eyes. “Wonnie, darling, do you mind if I catch up with Magda?”

“Not at all, my love. Enjoy yourself. I’m afraid I shall have to make my way to my father as well. No doubt I will be suffering a tirade from the Emperor for a good while, but afterwards, I think we are owed a hot bath, wouldn’t you say?”

The princess puckered her lips in a silent scolding which he confronted with a cheeky smile before he kissed her quickly and departed toward the emperor’s wing.

“Incorrigible,” Naran muttered as her lady-in-waiting did her best to pretend she’d understood none of the exchange.

Alone at last, the ladies linked arms and strolled through the courtyard with no destination in mind at all. Naran sighed happily.

“Oh, Magda, it is so good to see you again.”

“Your Highness, I have been waiting for you for what feels like an eternity. I cannot believe you did not write me! That I had to hear news of your arrival and departure from the villa from Hansol was very stressful. You know I worried constantly.”

“I’m sorry. If I am honest with you, for that first week, I could barely focus on anything other than my own despair.” At the princess’s frank words, her friend squeezed her lady’s arm, so, with a pair of very hot cheeks, Naran quickly added, “And, suddenly, it was as if I could not focus on anything other than the prince. Forgive me, but I seem to have thought of nothing but him these last weeks.”

Magda smiled so brightly that it shaved twenty years from her face, and for a moment, they were both young girls. “Well, then, all is forgiven.”

They shared a laugh, and as they strolled, Naran looked around the palace grounds. The leaves had come off the trees, though the yard had been swept pristine. She felt like she could see every detail in astonishing clarity like she never had before—every roaring lion sculpture, every soaring phoenix effigy, every polished wood carving. There were so many things she’d overlooked in her time here, it was embarrassing.

“Everything seems different here,” the princess mused with an incredulous chuckle.

“Well, in some ways, I suppose it is. We’ve been busy preparing the grounds for winter, for starters. The gardeners have been working round the clock to prune and lift spring bulbs. And, of course, Hayun was expelled from the palace the same day you left, so most servants have been more assiduous than ever."

Naran jolted forward, her heart sailing towards the heavens. “She was?”

“Oh yes, on the Prince’s orders evidently. With my own eyes, I swear to you I saw Her Majesty herself escort the girl out by the ear in front of half the palace.”

“Empress Indeok did!”

The princess could hardly believe it. In truth, since she’d reconciled with her husband, she hadn’t given any of the palace maids a second thought, but just the mention of Hayun’s name felt like a snake constricting Naran. With one fell swoop, Magda had just lopped it off at the head. Naran smiled from ear to ear.

The attendant nodded. “Hayun’s disgrace and banishment was the talk of Changdeokgung—Her Majesty made sure of it. Its effects were especially potent for a select few female members of the staff, I should say.”

Naran didn’t bother to hide her gloat. “How interesting…”

“Other than that, I suppose the only real point of popular discussion has been your sudden departures, of course.”

“Oh, of course. It was very sudden, especially for me. How did Emperor Gongmin fare?”

“Very bitterly,” Magda answered. “With the Champa royal family still visiting, things were very tense. I’m not sure what His Majesty had to do to smooth things over there, but he was very sore once they left a few days after you did. My friend, Yubin, works in the Emperor’s wing, and she said on more than one occasion, she had to clean up something broken.”

Naran gnawed on her bottom lip as she stared at the royal entrance where Hyungwon had just headed. “Do you think the prince will be all right?”

“He may have to answer for a few things, but he will be fine. Judging by your star-struck faces, I’ve no doubt he regrets nothing of his choice.”

“Oh, Magda,” said the princess as she rested her head on her friend’s shoulder, “neither do I.”

The pair entered her royal wing, but this time it was colored in a whole new light. Instead of formal and grave, it felt romantic and secluded. The bedrooms no longer felt far too close but rather too far apart, and the princess knew that one of them was about to be simply for show.

“I’ve never seen you so happy, My Lady.”

Naran sighed and collapsed sideways into a chair, her legs dangling over the arm and kicking idly while her finger twirled around a loose strand of hair. “That’s because I’ve never been so happy. I didn’t think I could be after how much everything hurt, and then all of a sudden, it was like breath came back into my lungs and color back into my world. Is that stupid? I sound stupid.”

Magda laughed. “Hardly. You sound like you’re in love.”

At this, the princess sat up. “I don’t know about all that…”

“Sure, my dear,” Magda laughed as she patted the princess's hand, and when she realized her impropriety, she sobered and corrected, “sorry, My Lady.”

“Oh, but, Magda, he did say those words to me.”

Again, excitement got the best of the attendant, and she squealed. “He did? Oh, such wonderful news. And I don't care that you outrank me, for I told you so, did I not? Yes, I did.”

“You're as incorrigible as Hyungwon is,” the princess muttered but with a grin. “Yes, you did tell me so.”

“Tell me everything! How did he react when you said it back?”

Naran cast her eyes to the corner as she answered, “I didn’t.”

“You didn’t confess, too?”

“I— No. I mean, I can’t say something I’m not sure of, can I? That wouldn’t be fair.”

“Oh, Your Grace,” said Magda in a tone that sounded all too sharply of Queen Jigme, and the princess felt the urge to defend herself the same as she would to her mother.

“I feel many complicated things toward the prince. How do I know it’s not just the… laying together,” Naran whispered with crimson cheeks, “that I like? Or the fact that he’s really the only man I know? Or that I’ve just grown used to our routine?”

“I can’t answer that for you, My Lady. All I can tell you is that a smile like yours doesn't come from routine.”

“Okay, maybe not routine. I’m just… confused.”

Magda pursed her lips. “Well, here comes your Prince back faster than we expected. I'm sure he'll be delighted to help you clear it up.”

Naran leapt out of her chair. “Wonnie! You’re back already?”

“The Emperor is busy, and I hardly care to wait. I can’t think straight anyway. Magda, my friend, you’re dismissed for now. Her Highness will call you when she’s free.”

“Hyungwon!” Naran yelped as he dragged her toward his bedroom. She had just enough time to toss a quick apology back at her companion before the door slammed shut behind her.

The prince collapsed on his bed straight away, pulling his wife on top of him, this time to her giggle. He kissed her hard, one of his enormous hands cupping the back of her head to deepen things while the other fell in league with her hip to grind her against his lap.

“Would you wait a minute,” Naran reprimanded gently between his troublemaking lip bites. “I have to talk with you about something.”

Hyungwon smirked. “Very well, but I’ll listen much better with my cock inside you.”

“Wicked prince! That may be so, but that shall make it very hard for me to talk at all, won’t it?” But even as the princess objected, she was gathering her skirts. Meanwhile, her husband parted his robes and pulled his manhood from his breeches. Naran sank on it at once, for her desire had flared the moment he’d hurried back to her. He hugged her to his chest with a contented sigh and kissed her forehead.

“So much better. Now, my love, what is it you have to talk to me about?”

It was much harder to form thoughts when she was full of her husband, but the princess tried her hardest. What had she been talking about only moments ago…

“The other day,” she started, her voice lost in the gathering haze of lust, “when you told me how you felt about me? I haven't stopped thinking about it.”

“That I love you?” Hyungwon asked with an amused grin.

At this, Naran remembered the thread she’d been unraveling. They had made a promise not to keep things from each other anymore, so she knew she couldn’t allow her insecurities to fester in secret any longer. “Yes, that. You know, I don't want you to feel that you have to say those things just because we’re married.”

The prince laughed, and his length stirred inside her. Naran let out a little gasp and burrowed deeper into the dip of her husband’s neck.

“My darling, I said it because I meant it, and I wanted you to know it beyond a doubt.”

“Hyungwon, do you have any idea how many royals go their entire lives without saying that to anyone? Do you have any idea how many people never say it?”

“What do I care about anyone else? Naran, there is only you.”

“It’s— The thing is, I don’t know anything about that stuff…”

“Love?”

Naran nodded, her eyes wide and her lips pressed together in a thin, taut line.

The prince brushed the hair back from his wife’s face so he could kiss her troubled brow before he said, “Should I not say these things to you because I really don’t see a way to keep them in any longer?”

“No, I— I liked hearing it... I'm just overwhelmed.”

Hyungwon laughed again and hugged her tighter to him. “I can tell. It’s okay if you can’t say it back yet, but I can’t go on keeping it in anymore either. I love you and I mean it.”

Naran huddled against his chest and pressed back firmer onto his shaft. Hyungwon’s invigorating scent wrapped her in an invisible second pair of arms as she fell deeper and deeper into him until she felt like she couldn’t ever climb her way back out.

Was that love or was it just desire or dependence even? How was she supposed to differentiate?

“I want to say it back,” she confessed, “but I need to be sure first.”

Hyungwon tilted her chin up so he could kiss her lightly on the lips and smile at her. There was nothing but peace reflected in his expression.

“So you don’t mind while I figure out my feelings?” Naran asked.

“I can wait. I already know how you feel now, but it’s okay if you need to be sure. I’m not going anywhere. Especially from here,” said Hyungwon with an impish grin before he thrust up into her snug heat.

Naran let out a tremendous moan, and just like that, they whiled away another afternoon straight from their bed into the promised tub where the princess, under her husband’s appreciative scrutiny and smoky-voiced encouragement, showcased exactly how she’d come to the realization that she wanted to be with her prince.

By the time the emperor was free enough to demand the appearance of his son before him, Hyungwon was in an unflappably good mood. Naran didn't imagine there was an accusation or a swear that the emperor could level at his son that would bother the prince in the slightest.

Freshly cleaned and feeling lighter than air, Naran floated out into the gardens. As Magda had said, most things had been shorn ahead of the winter, but even though things looked sparse and bare, the princess looked eagerly toward the next season. Winter in her homeland was a long, bleak affair, with bitter, unending winds and snow that felt more like knives. She wondered what it would be like here.

It was already chilly, but wrapped in a thick hanbok and still warmed by the heat the royal couple had generated in their bath, Naran barely noticed. The light was dimming rapidly by the time she reached the jade stream, but it was enough to make out the elegant figure of the empress sitting on her poet’s rock near the water’s edge. True to form, the woman had paper and a quill in hand as she hurried to record the last of her thoughts before the sun totally set.

“Pardon my interruption, You Majesty,” Naran said softly. She kept her eyes down as she approached the empress, so she could not gauge the older woman’s response. “I hope I am not importuning in your time of reflection?”

“Not at all. Please have a seat,” said Indeok as she set down her quill. Her tone was rather sterile, but when Naran ventured a glance up, she saw an unexpected gentleness in the woman’s face. In moments like these, the empress looked most like her son, round where others were sharp and accessible despite her paralyzing beauty.

“I did not have a chance to thank you for your incredible gift of poetry,” said the princess with more than a few wavers in her voice. “Your words have not left my mind since I read them. You somehow knew exactly what I didn’t know I needed to hear.”

For all the princess’s praise, Indeok simply hummed. Then, at last, her head tilted to the side as she studied her daughter-in-law painted in twilight, and she said, “It seems you came back to Changdeokgung rather different than when you left, Princess.”

Naran bowed deeply, her head practically kissing her knees. “Your Majesty, I doubt that could be so without your beautiful words.”

“Please rise, my daughter-in-law. I should like to look upon you.”

When the princess sat upright, her face was as red as an apple. Her eyes were shimmery, as much from nerves as emotion. It made the empress smile.

“My dear, you are in love,” Indeok murmured with unprecedented tenderness.

“But that is why I came out here! I am sorry for such an outburst, Your Majesty. Please excuse me, but how can I possibly know such a thing?”

“Why don’t you tell me how you’re feeling then? Sometimes we understand differently when we are made to put words to feeling.”

Naran’s brow scrunched as she considered. She was not a poet. She wasn’t even an artist. Her only real strengths were in riding and wandering, so it felt like an impossible ask. Yet somehow, right then, her answer came.

“I feel like I am standing still and moving all at once. Like I can leave whenever I want, but I don’t want to. My feet have stopped itching.”

It sounded so nonsensical to the princess’s ears, but it also encapsulated exactly how she felt.

The empress nodded and pressed, “And when you are away from him?”

“I don’t want to be.”

The answer was so automatic that it shocked Naran. She looked wide-eyed at the empress, who simply tilted her head to the side though it was clear enough what she was saying:

There you go.

“How did you know you were in love, Your Majesty?”

Indeok waved a hand dismissively. “I have never been in love, my dear. How do you think I can see such feelings in you so easily? You wear it like a shimmering cloak. It illuminates you. I have never shone so brightly as you do right now.”

��But His Majesty—”

“—is a duty I was made to fulfill. I’m not sure if he is capable of such emotion, but if he were, it would not be with his wife. When I am with the Emperor, I must be a different version of myself, and it is not a version I particularly like. Do you feel that way when you are beside your prince?”

“Never,” Naran admitted.

“I am relieved then. I would be very disappointed in Hyungwon otherwise, but you can never tell how other hands might have worked in secret. My greatest fear was that Hyungwon would favor his father’s views of the world, but the moment he fixed his heart on you in Sygnak, I trusted he could stay true to himself. Kingdom might come first to his father, but I am hardly such a patriot. My son is the only thing that matters to me, and you matter to him, so you matter to me, too, Narangerel.”

The princess gasped at the intimacy. With no clue what to do, she bowed again until the empress placed a hand under the young woman’s chin to raise her up.

“For such a headstrong woman, you can be quite shy,” Indeok laughed.

The sun had set behind the tree line, casting the world into long, thick shadows. The babble of the brook brought a sense of calm to the darkness, as did the empress’s soft voice.

“Mm, this is the happiest I have ever been in this palace… I’m just sorry the day is already over and I could not catch up with you both. Tomorrow though, I should like to see the two of you together at breakfast. I trust you’ll wake up that obstinate son of mine?”

Naran smiled. “I shall do my best.”

“I imagine he’s predisposed to do whatever you wish. Make sure you take full advantage of these halcyon days, my dear. Ah, how pretty,” the empress mused, “that you should experience the first bloom of love just as winter sets in. It brings such a liveliness to the slumbering world. I envy such brilliance.”

Ever the poet, her mother-in-law’s words knew just how to make color and emotion stir in the princess’s heart. Naran sighed. “Everyone around me is so sure of these things, and I know I should trust it, too, but something keeps pulling me back.”

“That is because love is not something you can think your way through, but,” said Indeok with a sturdy gaze, “I think you already know that. Rather, you may simply be afraid of it.”

“And if I am?” the princess said shakily.

“Then you need only give yourself time. Doubt will fade as your love grows. Is Hyungwon pressuring you?”

“He is not.”

“Then I suspect it won’t be long then. In the meantime, how about I call for some cider?”

There was a special glint to the empress’s eye that Naran had only stolen a glimpse of that night she and Saran had caught the empress with their mother, and the princess felt another fuzzy warmth overtaking her heart.

“I should very much like that, Your Majesty.”

“Wonderful. Then I have but one other question for you. Would you mind if, when we are alone, you call me Mother instead?”

“Are—are you sure?”

The empress smiled and stood to offer her hand. “Of course, daughter. Now, come. The hour is late and the air is cold, and I am in far too good a mood to do anything other than celebrate.”

Together, the two ladies returned to the warmth of the palace and cider and each other’s company and waited for Hyungwon to return. His smile when he caught his two favorite women drinking together was unparalleled, especially when he sat between them and had a drink himself. Before long, the empress retired to her wing, which allowed the newlyweds time to curl into each other under eyelids now heavy with alcohol.

“How did it go with your father?” Naran murmured as she relaxed in Hyungwon’s arms.

“Mostly yelling, plenty of cursing, too, which only grew more violent the longer I didn’t respond. But who cares?”

“A prince probably should.”

“Probably, but this one only cares that his wife was waiting for him.”

Naran turned in Hyungwon’s embrace so she could face him only to find him already smiling.

“I know this isn’t as simple as the country villa,” he said as he hugged her properly, “but this place finally feels like a home to me.”

“I was just thinking the same thing,” sighed the princess against his chest.

“I love you, my darling.”

And as she drifted off to the sound of her husband’s heart beating just for her, the last bits of Naran settled into their rightful place—beside Hyungwon.

A week had passed before the princess even had a chance to blink. In part, she supposed that was thanks to how many obligations the royal couple had to make up for since returning to the palace, but that was hardly the heart of it.

In truth, time had sped by because no matter how odious her assignments were, Naran could always look forward to reuniting with her prince. They hadn’t spent a night apart since, and she doubted they would ever again unless they were made to. Everything was easier to bear alongside Hyungwon. She could face anyone. She could handle every challenge. She could touch every joy the world could possibly offer.

Because she had him.

“Is everything all right, little star?” Hyungwon said as he joined his wife in her garden.

It was well into the heart of night. The skies were clear and the air was brittle, but in her robe, she was impervious to it.

Naran smiled. “I’m sorry. I did not mean to wake or worry you. All is well, my prince.”

“What are you doing out here?”

“Thinking.”

“In the cold?”

“Oh, this is nothing,” she replied with a smirk. “You haven’t felt cold until you’ve spent a winter on the steppe.”

Hyungwon nodded and pulled up alongside her, slipping his hand into hers. His skin was much colder than hers, and she squeezed him tightly to warm him up.

“What are you thinking about?” he asked.

“Right now? The first time we met under the stars. All the things I said and thought I meant. How little I knew about anything back then…”

The prince hummed gently. “And what were you thinking about before I got here?”

“How much I love you.”

It came out so naturally, it hardly felt like the first time she’d ever had the courage to say those words. Naran glanced to her husband in time to catch Hyungwon breaking into the most dazzling grin imaginable. He could have lit up the whole palace with it. His lips had parted, and he was so still, he might have frozen in shock. She squeezed his hand again, and it broke the spell enough that he could speak.

“You love me, too?” he repeated incredulously.

“I love you, too, Hyungwon, more than I realized I could love anyone. I think my heart has always wanted to love you; I just wouldn’t let it. I swear I’ll never make that mistake again. I love you now into forever.”

He cupped her cheeks then to guide her eyes from the stars to his. His thumbs stroked her tenderly, and after a moment, he tilted her mouth up to his to kiss her until her knees wobbled. Naran clutched at his forearms to steady herself, and the second he let her come up for air, he dipped his forehead down to hers.

It was hard to see him under her drooping lids, but she held his gaze as she wrapped her arms around him and nuzzled her cold nose against his puffy cheek.

“I love you,” she whispered again.

“I love you, too,” Hyungwon whispered back.

They exchanged giddy smiles and a few more kisses as their breath braided inextricably and floated up to their stars. With her lips still dancing happily against his, Naran bared one final secret to her husband.

“And I think I am with child.”

A/N: See you at the epilogue, my beloved reader friends. <3

#monsta x smut #multichapter #hyungwon smut #prisoner to temptation #royal au #arranged marriage #romance #slow burn #bodice ripper

34 notes · View notes

primusfortuna · 1 year

Text

Feld ⟡ Wonder Tea Party (07)

[01] [02] [03] [04] [05] [06] [XX]

“Each of Our Desires”

As we follow the bustling voices into a corner of town——

We find rows of street stalls, and dozens of people enjoying their shopping.

Emma: I bet we’ll find food and ingredients here. Why don’t we take a look?

Oscar: I agree. It’s a wonderful opportunity. I would love to eat my way around every corner.

Feld: Oi, didn’t we just have our fill with dinner...? How much do you expect to eat, you big glutton?

Emma: Oscar-san has room for ten meals a day, that’s for sure.

Feld: Anyway, these are some strange shops... What’s the “Shop of All Your Heart's Desires”?

Following Feld’s line of sight, a street vendor that looks like a bear beckons us towards him.

Bear Vendor: Come, come! Take a look!

Feld materializes and picks up a box no bigger than his palm from the front of the shop.

Feld: This is “what your heart desires”? I see nothing but a box.

Feld: ...What a scam.

Bear Vendor: No, no! Anyone who opens the box will see their heart’s desire inside.

Bear Vendor: But after an hour or so, the box will turn into foam and disappear.

Oscar: Very interesting. I’ll take one.

Bear Vendor: Many thanks~!

Oscar-san immediately goes to open his box——

Feld, Oscar, and Emma: What!? / ...! / Wah!

Colorful, poisonous-looking fruits eagerly pop out of the box.

Oscar: Incredible! I’ve never seen these ingredients before in my life... This is exactly what my heart desires.

Oscar: I will try them right away.

Feld: Oi! Don’t put suspicious things in your mouth!!

Oscar: ......They are far too hard. Unfortunately, I don’t believe I can continue eating this.

Emma: Well, I’m glad your teeth didn’t break...

Emma: But I guess they really do show us our desires. I think I’ll go ahead and buy one too.

Bear Vendor: Of course, many thanks~! ♪

Emma: (What is it that I desire...? If I had to pick something...)

Shouting the desire I thought of inside my heart, I gently open the box.

Emma: ....Huh?

Multicolored lights pour out of my box, along with the cheers of people around me.

Oscar: It’s very beautiful, but I had no clue you could receive something intangible. What did you wish for?

Emma: Umm... For all the meisters’ dreams to come true.

Feld: Heh. That won’t fit in a box.

Emma: Hey, why don’t you try it, Feld?

Feld: No, I’m——

Bear Vendor: Coming right up, many thanks~!

A large, furry paw snatches up a box and places it in Feld’s hand.

Feld: I haven’t even said I’ll buy it yet! Stop forcing your sales onto me!

Emma: Now, now, I’ll pay for it. You might as well open it now, right?

Feld: .......

He stares at the box with a rigid expression for some time, before slowly opening its lid.

Feld: What is this...!?

Emma: Dolls of... me and Oscar-san?

Feld: N-No!

Oscar: No, this is us, without a doubt. Hm... It’s very well-done; they’ve captured all of our features nicely.

Emma: (These boxes show us our heart’s desires, which means...)

Emma: Feld, were you thinking of Oscar-san and me?

Feld: ......

Oscar: If you don’t mind, I’d like to hear you elucidate what you wished for.

Feld: ......

Feld lets his eyes wander nervously, before he releases a small sigh of resignation.

Feld: Nothing immediately comes to mind when I think of my “heart’s desire”. I opened it without thinking about anything.

Feld: ...Because what I desire, in no small measure... is time spent with you two.

Feld: I suppose this is just what became of that.

Oscar: ...I see.

Emma: (I knew we were getting along better than when we first met, but...)

Seeing Feld’s affection manifest in the form of dolls, I feel warmth spread throughout my chest.

Feld averts his eyes from our gaze, and puts a hand to his throat.

Feld: ...Ever since the flames of wrath burrowed inside this body of mine, not once have they eased.

Feld: My anger boils up endlessly, however much I fight it. It’s unbearable and ostracizing, but...

Feld: Not only do you two never defy it, you even call it a source of strength and growth.

Feld: If this seething anger is not entirely an evil thing, then... embracing it might not be that bad after all.

Feld: ...That’s what I think when I’m with you.

Oscar: That’s a wonderful thing.

Oscar: You and I are kindred souls who share the same anger. There are times your anger is mine, and vice versa.

Oscar: So deepen your anger as much your heart desires.

Feld: Ha... I never thought I’d find someone who fans my flames instead of pouring water over them.

Emma: Well, I agree with Oscar-san. Because you always have a reason for your anger, Feld.

Emma: (Because he’s worried. Because he doesn’t want someone to get hurt. His reasons are always very thoughtful...)

Feld: Honestly. I’m surrounded by lunatics.

Feld: ...But that’s exactly why I wish to be with you.

His side profile looks so peaceful as he gazes at the dolls made in our image.

Then he pokes them with his long nails, as if afraid they might soon disappear.

← Prev

#yumekuro #yumekuro translations #ymkr #ymkr tl #fairy story #feld #wonder tea party

5 notes · View notes

longroadstonowhere · 1 year

Text

yeah, definitely managed to stop myself playing earlier than last night (well, earlier by virtue of time played, not earlier by virtue of the clock, but you know)

did a fair bit of running around doing little of import, as expected, but i did manage to do a few cool things as well, even went back to the chasm a couple of times

also finished up the goron quest - very fascinated at the potential fake zelda or evil zelda being presented, no idea what’s going on with that yet, and the glyph memories haven’t been particularly elucidating as of yet (especially with this whole immortal dragon thing that it seems like zelda wanted to do at some point)

WHICH REMINDS ME

so obviously we had the three dragons in botw, and i remember seeing one for the first time (without being spoiled about their existence because i played botw as fast and as hard as i’m trying to do totk right now for that reason) and just being in such complete awe, but after that first time (and especially after the whole grinding them for equipment upgrade ingredients thing) i got used to them and they’re cool, but i didn’t expect to be surprised, you know?

so i’m playing tears of the kingdom, i end up over by lake hylia for the glyph and also the bridge monster (i have a special place in my heart for gleeoks because of the original zelda - still haven’t fought any in totk but definitely got pictures), and i see the electric dragon (whose name i’ve forgotten) loping through the sky and i’m like ‘oh right! that’s his pattern, he flies through the skies in this direction, cool, nice to know they haven’t changed that’

i figure out some way of getting up on his level so i can get some random ingredient off him (think i ended up with a horn piece?), and i didn’t have anything else i immediately wanted to do so i figured i’d hang around and see where he went - there’s a big ass whirlpool in lake hylia for some reason, maybe he goes in there? that’d be fun

nope

he flies into the fucking depths

i honestly couldn’t believe it at first, i had to open my map and be like ‘yup, nope, that is definitely a chasm entrance, he is just flying straight down into that chasm, holy shit’

so of course i run over and jump down the chasm with him cuz holy shit??? dragon in the depths????? and i didn’t follow him down there, but i did trigger a nearby lightroot so i can teleport there if i want and also better visibility for the next time i’m in the area, but just..... i did not expect to have such a fun moment with the dragons again, and i’m so glad it worked out

the only thing that could’ve made it better would be if i’d been down in the depths already, just toddling along, and suddenly there’s just a fucking dragon flying above me, like what the hell, i don’t even know what i would’ve done about that

at some point, after i finish all the main stuff, i’m gonna follow him through the depths just to see where he goes because hot damn that is fascinating

anyway

other than that i just did the goron thing like i said, found a few more geoglyphs (the purah pad, the molduga, and the octorok i think), activated a few towers and found one where the dude who will fix it for me said something about a cave and mushrooms but i went and looked in the only nearby cave i could find and there wasn’t anything special to do so i don’t know what he’s looking for from me??? anyway that’s something i’m figuring out later, for now i’m in kakariko village (it was very nostalgic being around the dueling peaks stable), looking forward to learning about ring ruins, and then i’ll probably go to the zora quest at some point soon

oh i also found a sky island that is just permanently waterfalling at a visible distance and i wanna know what’s up with that so bad but the island is too far for me to reach via tower jump and i have no zonai fans on my person (i have what feels like a dozen of every other item but no fans, gotta go back to the sky gacha machine as opposed to the one in the depths i found that wasn’t giving me any fans at all)

but tomorrow i’m dropping by my parents to give mother’s day stuff so i have to do hygiene things before i go (hopefully in the morning), and then i have work on monday, so the pace of gaming will be slowed a little until monday evening when my vacation truly begins

2 notes · View notes

partyinthemysterymachine · 2 years

Note

Ooh, deleted scene?

D E L E T E D - S C E N E

ok SO!! this is a Deleted Scene™️ (1/????) from the Library Arc©️ fiasco that it was (fond), specifically Ch64: Bible.

it's VERY silly, LOL, but the idea was in my brain and i had to do what i always do: Just Fuckin Write It Out, Cuz U Never Know If It's Worth It™️ (but also, i consider all my scenes - whether the make The Cut (haha, funny bc it literally got cut) or not - to be an exercise in character development; we're just here to have fun, gang!!)

so....... without further aduuuuuuu:

✨the deleted scene✨

(spoiler alert?? .. idk...???? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ spoilers-ish. maybe. FEH idk)

(CONTEXT: this occurred just after James came back up from the basement and Harry's telling him about the botched bible. Unfortunately i don't seem to have whatever'd led up to this, but one can only assume that James had the Universe Brained idea to suggest that Harry go look for another bible in the library.)

“By god, we are just on the same wavelength today!” Harry exclaimed, loaded with enough petty sarcasm to burst a bat. He pushed the chair back a bit at an angle to give himself room, threw one knee over the other, and landed the topmost a good smack. “And yanno what?” Then, with the flair and wobble of a wet noodle, dropped his side into the short backing of the chair, and slung his bent elbow over its ledge, beaming at James’s unamused face. “I thought the same thing! — and even went to check!”

James stared deadpan into Harry’s fake, stretched-out smile. Facing each other with contrasting expressions like that, they looked like the famous pair of stage drama masks. He knew where this was going the moment Harry started up with his dramatic nonsense, and now that it seemed like Harry was waiting for him to take his turn, he still hadn’t decided how much freedom to be an asshole he wanted Harry to have.

His nose released a short bout of wind. “Oh dear. Oh no.” James uttered, all in a monotone that made plywood seem interesting. “Did something happen.”

“James, you are not going to believe this,” Harry began in a way so sugarcoated that James thought that if anything, the guy should consider hosting daytime TV as a backup in case his writing career ever failed, “but something. Did.”

“Oh, no.”

“Oh, yes.”

“Oh, no.”

“Oh, yes!”

“What was it.”

“Hold onto your ass, and onto your seat for this one— because they don’t. Have. One.”

James had never struggled so hard not to break character. He was so fucking close to cracking up that he was considering leaving right then and there; and yet, he bravely persisted. “Oh, no: they don’t have an ass, or a seat?”

But Harry was still talking, though. “But who [REDACTED] are of course both news to me, and totally unknown to me. It seems like you were right about your theory though, which is damn spooky, if ya ask me.”

“.. yeah,” James quietly replied. “I’m a little spooked too.”

“You sure Silent Hill didn’t give you a hint for this?”

“Not at all. — I mean, it didn’t give me a hint, or say anything about it. Honest.”

“I believe you; I’m just steppin’ on your tail for fun.”

“It’s okay.” pause “.. so what’s it mean?”

“That’s a question I’d love to answer,” he sighed, “but I got nothing. Ran into a bigger problem during all this. Look.”

“Trouble in River City - this copy of the Order bible is borked. Seemingly random too,” he elucidated, picking at dog eared pages to show James more examples, “but this seems too fucking messy, really, for it to be accidental.”

“No kidding. These were going to be shipped out to Utah in a box.”

“Jesus, you remember that?”

“What?”

“The destination. Utah.”

“Yeah, cuz I thought it was weird. It’s all Mormons over there.

“You’re sharper than a hornet on a stick; I felt the same way. But yeah; this seems fucked. The good news is that we left the box back at the police station, and we ought to head over to the Central side of Silent Hill at some point, anyway.”

“Hmm. Yeah. Good call.”

“Thanks, I made it myself.” sighs. “I think, other than that? That’s it for me; I’m beat, James.”

“Yeah.”

“Did you make any progress with the moths?”

A shrug. “I made notes. I’ll go over them with you later.”

He looked thankful. “Sounds good.”

#ches writes #goomt #hope u enjoy(ed)!!! :3c #i have a LOT of shit that i've cut and some will get recycled into later scenes and plot points so Unfortunately i can't post much #but i hope this dumb little snippet gave ppl a tickle :3c #OH SHIT NINJA EDIT

2 notes · View notes

wordsgood · 1 year

Text

this long post is originally posted on my writing blog, random pattern generator.

I don’t remember where, but I came across some article about how to write blog posts if you’re trying to grow your authorial platform. Of course you have to write about writing, but, according to the article, no one wants to read about what you’re writing. You have to write advice posts for the readers, instead.

I might have advice that people would want to hear if I already had a book or two published, or if I already had some kind of platform. But since I don’t have either of those things, what do I have to give anyone besides the kind of generic advice that thirty people have already written about in actual books about writing, and that 300 people have already blogged about for free? Characterization, in media res, save the cat, five tips to make your villain more formidable? I don’t have anything of substance to add to these conversations. I’m not a beginner by any means, but I haven’t achieved the kind of success that would make me qualified to advise anyone.

Except, maybe, in one area: the “does my writing really matter?” area. Not that I’m hugely successful there, either, but I’ve gotten over a pretty rough dry spell in the past few years. I thought I’d lost my calling for good, but here I am, a year or two later, keeping a spreadsheet of my various WIPs’ daily word counts. That’s a comeback story of sorts. That might count for something.

I don’t think it would be honest of me to comfort anyone, though.

The thing about having this question - “am I worthy of this craft that I love?” - leeching uncertainty, self-hatred, and lethargy into your atmosphere is that, in my experience, no one can answer it for you. It makes you think you need validation from other people. And, of course, it never hurts to have people in your corner; you may need other people’s words to keep you hydrated while you cross the desert. But no one can carry you across. There is no Sam Gamgee for this particular trek. It’s just you and whatever god you own.

You can receive the kindest, most well-meaning, supportive words, and there’s every chance in the world that they’ll dry up in your ears before they can ever reach your head. The Question has locked you up like a princess in a castle or Amontillado in the wall or Ariel in the pine and there might not be anything that can reach you until you erase the question mark for yourself.

I won’t pretend that’s easy. It took me a long time and a couple very hard conversations before I finally got out of the desert.

Right here is where the script dictates: But I broke through anyway. All it took was trying hard enough, long enough - I will not elucidate what ‘trying’ means; Just Do It - and now I’m free and happy and whenever I doubt myself now I just look back on how I beat The Question already and it doesn’t have any power over me anymore, and all you need to do is keep trying, too, like me.

This is where I’m supposed to say, It’s hard work, but it’s worth the effort.

Screw that. It wasn’t worth the effort. Nothing is worth how much and how long I let The Question hurt me and hold me down. I’m not far enough out of the desert to pretend like I’m fine now, that it doesn’t still hurt even when I’m finishing novels and getting my 1-5 kudos per week on AO3. Some part of me died in the desert and it’s not coming back.

So, no, I’m not going to tell you - should you be uncertain, desperate, hurting, empty, any or all of the above - that I think your pain is only temporary or that your struggle is worth it. If that’s what you need to hear, you can find other people who will be happy to pass on that message. If you need to hear that all you’ve got to do is just keep trying, just keep going, just keep hoping and believing, you’ve come to the wrong place. When I was in the desert, hearing that kind of encouragement was the opposite of encouraging. I was tired. I had already spent months or years trying, going, hoping. I’m sure, now, that the effort wasn’t made in vain, but hearing that I had to keep trying to get where I wanted to be - well, there’s an or else hidden at the end of that sentence. That was the encouragement of someone who’d already made it out of the desert and was floating by in a hot air balloon, having forgotten how it felt to have your feet in the sand and a sword over your head. Keep going, or else. I’m not a child, I wanted to tell them. I’m no writing noob. What do you think I’ve been doing but trying? What else have I been sobbing over my keyboard about?

Here’s the only thing that gave me an inch of peace: T.S. Eliot and the book of Leviticus.

T.S. Eliot may be obvious - I’ve already made at least a couple blog posts about how I basically live my creative life by Four Quartets - but Leviticus is a little newer. Not the whole of the book, but, specifically, the concept of the year of Jubilee, every fiftieth year, the year of release. And specifically the part of the year of Jubilee that deals with letting fields lay unsown. You let the land alone. You let it lie fallow. Don’t touch a spade or toss a seed. “It shall be holy to you”: a holy abandonment.

You can try for as long as you can hold out, but you may well reach a point at which it doesn’t matter. The tank is empty, the field is dry, the stone is out of blood. You have to stop trying or you’ll break something vital, like a bone or your faith in yourself.

You know what’s coming now:

I said to my soul, be still, and wait without hope For hope would be hope for the wrong thing; wait without love, For love would be love of the wrong thing; there is yet faith But the faith and the love and the hope are all in the waiting. Wait without thought, for you are not ready for thought: So the darkness shall be the light, and the stillness the dancing. Whisper of running streams, and winter lightning. The wild thyme unseen and the wild strawberry, The laughter in the garden, echoed ecstasy Not lost, but requiring, pointing to the agony Of death and birth.

Darkness and stillness will be the light and the dancing. Your neurons will flash again in the darkness and your thoughts will dance again in the stillness. The seed will grow when it’s buried like the dead.

That’s what got me across the line in the sand: the idea that I didn’t have to keep trying. I didn’t have to prove what I was or what I wanted. My God knew that already; in some deep place, so did I. None of that mattered, though, when I had given all I had to give. Some people may be, but I am not a bottomless well, and I’d drunk myself dry. I didn’t need to try harder or work longer; I needed to exist without effort, so that the well could refill. I needed to wait, not with hopelessness, but without hope. Even hope takes up precious energy that you need just to put one foot in front of the other.

I needed to spend months doing crafts with my hands, reading books and watching movies and shows and listening to music and looking at nature, not trying to write. I didn’t need platitudes about how everything would eventually work out, because that would be hope for the wrong thing. I needed rest. I needed to lie fallow.

That’s the thing about The Question. Am I worthy of this craft that I love? cannot and will not be answered definitively by other people. It can barely be answered by you. If you thought the answer was yes, you wouldn’t be asking. If the answer were no, you wouldn’t be doing your craft. (I’m talking about writing for myself, but I’m sure people have asked themselves The Question for every conceivable calling or career.) But if you’re asking The Question of yourself, you’re tired and scared and in pain, your faith is flagging, because you’re driving on close to empty. You’re asking because you want the answer to be yes but you don’t have it in you to believe it.

I’m here to tell you that you don’t have to believe it, or even try to. Your craft will outlive you; it will not cease to be when you let it go. For whatever it’s worth, you’ve got my permission not to be graceful about your fallowing; you don’t have to look starry-eyed to the future or speak of “this season of difficulty” or whatever the religious or self-care language might be this month. Forget your craft. Forget writing. Screw it. You shouldn’t feel obligated to enjoy this time, or make it Instagrammable or TikTokable. It sucks. End of sentence. It can feel like the ending of your life and I don’t believe in guilting people into feeling optimistic or positively about such things.

I’m not here to tell you that you’ll get everything back twice over, that you’ll look back on this time and laugh and be grateful, that you need to do or prepare for anything, that you’ll one day float back over the desert in a hot air balloon as a wiser, more enlightened individual. If you’re asking, Will I ever write again? or When does the creative urge come back? I’m not going to say, Oh, of course it will, just be patient, it’ll come back one day. Just keep going. I don’t know you, I don’t know your life or your future. Maybe it won’t. Maybe that chapter is closed for you. Weigh the possibility in your mind; what’s your reaction? Fear, relief, agony, all of the above? It doesn’t matter. Your emotions will most likely not be a good compass to follow. That, in some way, is the point: there’s no good compass at all. We all drive by the light of our grubby headlights.

What I do believe, even at my lowest point, for myself and for you, is that no love is ever wasted. If you’ve loved your craft, if you still do even in the desert, even in the stillness and the darkness, then it wasn’t and isn’t for no reason. Whether you find your way back to your craft or you move on to something else once you’re out of the desert, you’ll carry what you learned and how you loved either way, and there is always value in that.

I’m taking your face in my hands and repeating it until you believe it: love is never wasted. Neither is time in the desert. I’m not saying that you should try to find some amorphous beauty in a painful time, that if you aren’t grateful for it or productive through it then you aren’t suffering properly and thus don’t deserve what you want, but I am saying that the dry spells don’t disqualify you from your craft. They are, unfortunately, a part of the creative life. Will you ever write, paint, animate, carve again? Maybe, maybe not, I’m not going to make you empty promises. But a yellow light isn’t a stop sign, and the struggle may well be temporary. You won’t know until you do.

That’s my anti-advice for those who may be struggling with their art: it might be your fiftieth year. It may be time to stop trying so hard. It might be time to do a Yoga With Adriene or two and see if candle-making is for you. It might be time to write three thousand angry, bitter blog posts about how it feels like you’ve spent your life thus far on a hopeless dream. Drop your pen, your paintbrush, your needle, your sculpting tools, your power tools. Let your soul grow wild; let your well refill. Don’t tell yourself that the art will be back, don’t hope for the wrong thing, don’t let internet platitudes and toxic positivity convince you to spend energy you don’t have.

Breathe.

Sit.

Wait.

No matter the answer you find at the end of the desert, love will wait with you.

#michael-annals #trying a new thing with the ol blog #idk i finally feel like i have something that might help someone somewhere. if just like..... one or two people #this is what i would have wanted to hear tbh. this is what i would have preferred to be told

1 note · View note

dasher85 · 2 years

Text

Elucidation

Alhaitham x reader | y/n | you

Slow burn

Part 4

[ When Alhaitham is pressured by the arranged marriage he refuses to deny his feelings any longer. ]

-----------------------

[ Two weeks left ]

"Grand Sage… Acting Grand Sage, are you not listening again?" You calmly called out to take his attention. You’re sure he was listening to you just awhile ago... but turns out he’s not? or is he simply distracted?

"What?"

You sighed, explaining once more feels a little awkward but you still need his approval.

"I was saying that, have you approved my one month leave? I need to prepare for my wedding in two weeks from now. But I'll resume the research two weeks after my wedding. So it's-"

"I refuse to approve."

He cut you short, and you looked at him in absolute surprise because just by his tone, you could tell he wasn't joking either. He was dead serious.

"Do I need to resign… just so I can have a wedding?" You searched his eyes, refusing to believe what he says, eagerly waiting for him to reveal that it was all just a sick joke.

He looked away, as he proceeded with his work. You slowly stood up from the couch at his office and approached his desk.

"... Come on, you're joking right?" You smiled but you're actually getting worried by the second.

"Alhaitham are you not-"

He placed down his quill pen, stood up and strides his way out from his own office. In fact he was so fast that you already knew he was completely ignoring your request by now.

Your eyes lingers at the closed door, and ever so slowly sadness starts to seep inside your heart. It does feel excruciatingly painful when he actually left you there for no solid reason at all. You're used to his behavior but he never once treated you this way. A sigh escapes your lips as you slowly place your wedding invitation on his desk.

'What's so wrong about marriage anyways? Does he hate it so bad that I shouldn't talk about it to him?' You try to comfort yourself but you just couldn't find the reason behind his disapproval.

The walk returning home feels gloomy. You try to remove the thoughts about him, but that moment only replays in your head on repeat.

'Why does it feel unbearable?' you thought, 'Was it because I was disturbing him during his work hours?'

You have no idea how to make things better for the both of you. What should you do just so he would approve your leave?

So many questions and you had no way of answering it yourself. It is difficult when you're not able to ask the person who created these questions inside your head.

[ 12 days left ]

"Y/n…"

A voice you're familiar with called your name, you turned in response and sure enough it was him. You displayed a smile feeling a little happy to see him.

"You didn't came to the library, so I thought you were unwell"

"Alhaitham, I've decided that I'll resign. I just haven't sent you the full resignation letter."

He finally sat next to you, now that you were seeing his face up close… he looks terrible.

"Did you not sleep well?"

He deliberately ignored the mention of your resignation and threw you an entirely different question. But it seems based on his observation, the both of you probably looked terrible.

"You too. You look like you haven't slept in days"

He nodded, having no effort to say that it was all your imagination. Like he usually says.

Eventually he sighed and you took a sip of the drink you ordered earlier even before his sudden appearance.

The cafe was filled with customers and some were casually talking or laughing with their friends, literally having idle chit chat while you two silently stared at nothingness. You didn't want to start the conversation or even try to because you're scared it'll make things worse. For all you knew, he would either reply back with something that makes you feel unhappy or won't even give a proper answer.

"I'm sorry for leaving you that day Y/n"

'Oh? Really? He's capable of apologizing?' The way he never once did made you think he was never sincere about your friendship after all these years. But you never really hated him for not saying these things either.

"It's alright." You smiled already feeling much better.

"No. It's not"

You finally averted your gaze away from the cup to focus on him as you expected him to elaborate more.

"I still feel guilty whenever I think about it. I knew you would feel sad. I want to apologize later that day but your parents disapprove my visits"

In disbelief you never knew all about it but he hasn't told you the reasons behind it all. Why did he react so negatively?

"Did I disturbed you that day? Were you so busy dealing with your work that it made you feel irritated with all the ramblings I made?"

He frowns deepens as he finally replies only after you thought he wouldn't be answering your question.

"I never once feel irritated when I’m with you. In fact I'm happy whenever you're around"

You gulped feeling in complete disarray. Unable to believe those words he has just revealed to you.

'He's happy??! Is that what he really feels?' After all these years, he always looked like he could jump out a window just to remove all the noise away from him. But still he didn't yet give an answer behind his irritation that day.

"But why did you-"

"Because I never want you to agree with that arranged marriage and I feel miserable just thinking about it."

After all this time, he was still particularly disapproving of the arranged marriage as if he was the one who's going to be forced into one.

"Like I said, even if I refuse, I don't think I have that much of an option. I haven't dated anyone until now and-"

You tried to explain and he cuts through your sentence once more.

"Do you never see me as an option?"

[ Rational decisions ]

His words only implies one thing and you clearly understand what he meant by that. This was the same question he had asked you before and it still rings clearly in your head but at that time you didn't understand what he meant. Has he been thinking about this ever since back then?

"Huh? Do you actually mean that? Are you not talking nonsense?"

He nods, "I just won't be giving you divorce as an option."

"Wait… aren't you just feeling bad for me that you'd do this? That you're talking like this?"

"Why would I do that? I've only want to do the things that I'm interested in doing"

'Is he drunk?'. You refused to believe all these words he's been saying to you.

"I know that I almost never told you about how I feel or what I think… I'm not trying to hide it from you, it's just difficult for me to explain these things. For so long, I've been having this constant debate inside my head and I don't know if it's even real or how do I deal with this problem?"

Listening to his somber voice slowly silence away the voices in the background as you solely focus your attention on him.

"I always thought if I ignored it, I could slowly remove such irrational thoughts and my decisions would become clearer… and yet you won't stop talking about this marriage. It infuriates me to think that you're happy to accept it so easily"

'He's definitely serious right now. I don't know, he's so mad'. In all his seriousness, you're still trying to keep yourself calm to prevent yourself from smiling over it because you still believed he’s worried about you as how a good friend would be.

He turned his gaze away from you, looking towards the clean wooden table as if deliberately debating yet again inside his overly brilliant brain.

"...I want you to reject that arranged marriage and choose me instead."

He returns his gaze towards you, those teal colored eyes seemingly glistening in hopes you'd actually choose him.

"Are you really willing to do that?"

Truly you only ever think of him as a friend. Although he's not really the best of friend you have but he's a good man in some ways. You still dislike the way he talks with you though but it's bearable. So, you’re still in disbelieve that he’s really suggesting in becoming more than friends.

You never wanted him to feel obliged into doing anything like this. If anything he should be choosing someone out of love not out of concern for the other person. Moreover, it’s too sudden.

"I am certain"

You revealed a small smile, not because you were entirely happy with his answer but you're already planning to ask yet another question.

"Doing what to be precise?"

"Marrying you of course"

Listening to his reply makes you laugh, it feels refreshing to see the frown on his face return as if he's telling you to not ask him dumb questions or that he's worried about your sudden reactions. It’s either one but you’re not certain which one.

"You never read romance novels before, do you?"

He shook his head and you nodded. It was as expected of him. He's not the least interested in those kinds of books.

"Let me just confirm this with you, Alhaitham… I still decide to resign and proceed with the arranged marriage"

His eyes widen at your words. You could tell he was in utter surprise and was unable to conceal his burst of disappointment.

"As scholars, I think we both know in research there is no such thing as an absolute answer but in mathematical equations it won't be correct until it is proven correct. You have a few more days, find the answer, find those words and I won't hesitate to choose you"

You displayed a warm smile before taking another sip from the warm cup of tea. Yes, it's a difficult question and you're making things exceptionally hard for him but if he's willing then it's only proven that he's making the right decision.

------------------------

#alhaitham #alhaitham x reader #genshin impact #genshin impact alhaitham

117 notes · View notes

newsworld-nw · 11 months

Text

Why did Britney Spears and Sam Asghari break up? Here's what we know about their divorce

Picture credit score: NINA PROMMER/EPA-EFE/Shutterstock Britney Spears And Sam Asghari It appeared completely satisfied ever after, however that modified once they introduced their divorce in the summertime of 2023. After the pop singer and actor broke up, followers have been curious as to what led to the tip of their relationship. Scroll down to search out out every thing we find out about Britney and Sam's cut up.

Why did Britney Spears and Sam Asghari break up?

In August, Britney and Sam individually introduced their separation. “Oops! I Did It Once more” artiste confirmed the information of her divorce in a prolonged Instagram caption. “As everybody is aware of, Hesam and I are not collectively … (six) years is a very long time to be with somebody, so I am a bit shocked however … I am not right here to elucidate why it is actually no person's enterprise!! !" Britney wrote. "However, I actually could not take it anymore!!! In some type of telepathic manner, I've obtained so many messages from buddies that soften my coronary heart, and I thanks!!!" The Princess of Pop added, "I have been taking part in it robust for a very long time, and my Instagram might look excellent, but it surely's removed from actuality, and I feel everyone knows that!!! It is about how I actually really feel. I need to present my feelings and tears, however (for some cause) I've at all times needed to disguise my weak spot!!! If I wasn't my father's robust soldier, I might have been despatched away to be mounted by medical doctors!!! However at the moment I Household was wanted essentially the most!!! Love you unconditionally... not situations!!!! So, I will be as robust as I can and do my finest!!! And I am really doing fairly good!!! Anyway, have a pleasant day , and remember to smile (sic)!!!” For Sam's half, the non-public coach additionally tried a optimistic tone in her personal Instagram assertion. "After six years of affection and dedication to one another, my spouse and I've determined to finish our journey collectively," he wrote on a black display screen. “We'll maintain on to the love and respect we've got for one another and I want her at all times the most effective. "S**t occurs. It appears ridiculous to ask for privateness, so I might ask everybody, together with the media, to be type and thoughtful." Sam reportedly filed for divorce on August 16, citing "irreconcilable variations" as the explanation for his or her separation.

Is Britney Spears and Sam Asghari Divorced?

Since Sam filed the papers in August, it seems like the 2 are nonetheless understanding the main points of their divorce. Web page six The previous couple reportedly signed a prenuptial settlement earlier than they tied the knot. "Britney and Sam signed a prenup on his behalf," a supply advised the outlet. "The cash she made earlier than marriage is protected."

How lengthy have been Britney Spears and Sam Asghari collectively?

Sam and Britney first met in late 2016 on the set of her "Slumber Celebration" music video. After courting for 5 years, the pair introduced their engagement in September 2021. The next yr, the now-estranged husband and spouse exchanged vows in a shocking ceremony in Los Angeles in June 2022. Followers lastly acquired a glimpse of Britney and Sam's wedding ceremony and cut up into her upcoming memoir, The Girl in Me, which hits cabinets on October 24. When requested how Sam felt about being known as a "present from God" within the e-book, he responded warmly. "It made me chuckle," he advised a reporter TMZ In a video taken Oct. 25 in Los Angeles. "I am pleased with him," he continued. "And I hope he takes over the world." #Britney #Spears #Sam #Asghari #break #Heres #divorce Read the full article

0 notes

malstermonkey · 1 year

Text

Difficult conversations

More often than not a conversation is deemed “difficult” because we approach it from the perspective of trying to convince somebody that they have done wrong by us..............and there’s the issue because right form the outset it is trying to show somebody that they are in the wrong -- sadly it is one of the worst traits of humans to deny that this possibility exists and when a conversation to convince another of their mistake is to be had, the off is “instant defensiveness”. Can we solve this?

Can we get another human to see and understand that they have done wrong (to/by us?). The answer is yes, but to achieve that aim our approach has to be radically different.

Let’s say that I’m relatively new in a senor role and I need to have a conversation with my boss about how his last decision/action has me feeling like I’ve been left out to dry. The normal approach is to make him aware of how you feel and hope that boos-person is an empathetic, sensitive leader who will recognise this & both apologise and make amends. It has worked, in my experience but, in the main, just leads to an unsatisfactory outcome for both sides and, often, taints the working relationship going forward.

The radical shift of perspective which is required is to step away from the approach of showing boss-person what they have done wrong and, instead, make boss-person realise it instead -- where realisation comes in the form of insight and understanding where, as we know from our own experience, this is most powerful when it comes from within me (self-realisation) rather than being told by another (I’m rubbish at being told what to do, in fact I’ll often do exactly the opposite, no matter how much I actually harm myself with it).

Effectively this means that achieving the outcome you need from a difficult conversation is that you need to suggest/put the idea in boss-persons head and then have them believe they came up with it.

Why? Well, most boss-people are egocentric shits who rarely accept straightforward and honest feedback anyway: which I get, the kind character who has the determination and drive to set up and start a business is hardly ever a particularly fine CEO of that selfsame business (when it’s a going concern & the task is now not about survival but about subtly balancing loads of different drivers, interests, skills, ambitions etc etc) -- they are radically different skill sets.

And how does this process of “suggestion” practically work? Simples -- you ask for help!

Begin the conversation with “I need some help........” or “I’m a somewhat confused.....” or “I don’t understand how this (process or whatever) works......” -- doing this creates an invitation to participate in a process of elucidation/education (and, by gosh, show me somebody who doesn’t want to teach!)...........

The next step in this process is that when the inevitable contradictory explanation is offered you go real simples -- “.......so, help me out (and sorry for being a little slow on the uptake), when we (always talk about we, it depersonalises the conversation) aid we would do this, but then, when a client wanted that, our default position is to always do what the client wants?”

Always start every question where boss-person recognises that yours is the innocent enquiry as it comes from a place of confusion, lack of clarity etc etc......and then your follow-up should be one of clarification & seeeking elucidation....

This goes on for so long as it takes boss-person to realise that there is an inconsistency in their behaviour at play and allow them to own it..........it’s classical stuff and actually has a name, “the Socratic Method”!

So, does this feel a little compliant, almost as if you’re somewhat de-basing yourself? After all, the harm has been done you you but boss-person.........well, the answer is all about the mind-change you have to effect: at the end of the day your focus should be on what you are trying to achieve, in other words, on the outcome. The outcome here is that you think it is important boss-person understands that there is an issue he which you feel needs resolution..........and with resolution you will feel better, so does it really matter how you get there (the process)?

Last point: have a think about how undermined you really are by the boss-person: could it be that, given how you are still feeling your way in this company could it be that your issues carry within them an element of lack of confidence on your part and that, therefore, you are being a little too sensitive? Secondly, everybody else in the business will have experienced similar behaviour from boss-person & will therefore not attach a heap of importance to it.........hence, I’m carefully trying to suggest that before the DC (difficult conversation) is had we need to make sure we’ve been tough on ourselves & fully squared off the part we bring to the sitch......

1 note · View note

sagaofstardustmkg · 2 years

Text

yosei || baku || trial 6.7?? || re: nev, ari

With Ben returned to his husband's side, Fumie's hand returns to her pocket, where it folds and unfolds the paper inside as she listens to their new topic of discussion. Seeing them together is nice, though. Even though it seems like they might need therapy, or something... it's nice. She can't imagine losing someone she loves like that. She also, privately, hopes she might have someone she loves like that one day. Now that they might have the chance.

Anyway, the topic. Fairies? She doesn't really know anything about that. She'd barely even heard of them before, outside of stories and things. All of these documents and such are a bit wordy for her, though... she's not as smart as most of her friends, so she's barely managing to follow what's being explained.

There are some things she can follow, though-- other people's questions. She gives Arianna a long, curious look. Something stirs in her memory, vaguely. But now probably isn't the time for it...

"...I-I don't really understand why any of this is relevant either, but... w-we've been going, um... a bunch of different places, right? You know... t-the beach, and... the desert... and the, um, ghosts could go back there. Are those... these pocket dimensions, or something? It sounds like a human... could go between them, um, with a..."

She leans over to squint again.

"Dimensional focus...? So is that what's... h-happening? Why we keep traveling around? Someone used one of those... but would you need multiple f-focuses? To keep going different places? Or is it... one f-focus from one person? That's just really powerful? Or... broken? ...I-I guess I'm not really... this is too smart for me, sorry..."

She looks at the ghosts, hoping one of them can elucidate, seeing as they've been in corgi town this whole time.

#endgame #trial #baku

0 notes

monsterhighdiaries · 2 years

Text

Rochelle & Venus’ Zombie Shake Diary

[Editor's Note - This written conversation was discovered while investigating an incident that involved an outbreak of a strange zombie-like behavior amongst the non-zombie student population at Monster High.]

Please accept my apologies for our little mishap today. I should have been paying better attention to where I was going as opposed to where I was coming from; I hope I did not cause the damage to you.

No worries! It takes a lot more than that to knock the bark off of me. I don't know what Ghoulia was doing in the Mad Science lab, but it uprooted the whole class. Just glad I got out of the way before the crowd pruned me, but I was hoping to bump into you anyway to see if you wanted to come over tonight and get ready for the dance together.

I am glad that you were not hurt when I knocked you down, and yes, I would love to get ready for the dance at your house. That would be très utile, I think since I have never been a zombie before. Not that you have, either, but between the two of us, maybe we can get it right, no? I wish I could have been there for whatever it was that happened.

Unfortunately, I was not present to prevent whatever it was, but I did arrive in time to help with the control of the crowd. Have you made your fashion choice for the dance?

I haven't made up my mind yet, but I do have a couple of ideas that are germinating. I was going to ask Ghoulia for some advice, but I can't seem to find her. You haven't seen her around, have you? I hope she's okay.

No! I have not seen my friend Ghoulia, and I have been looking for her since after the stampede outside of the Mad Science Class. I have sent her the text but have not gotten a reply. Deuce told me he saw her dancing into Home Ick, but I have heard nothing since then.

Dancing? Ghoulia was dancing? Are you sure? That seems very un-Ghoulia-like for the middle of a school day.

Well, I am sure that Deuce would not tell me something that is not true. He is rock solid of character, and there is not much that happens around him he does not see. I do agree, however, that it does seem quite out of character for Ghoulia to appear so... frolicsome during normal school hours. There must be something on going here that I am not yet aware of.

I think you mean "going on" not "on going", but I agree with you about Deuce. He normally doesn't sprout off about something unless it's true. In fact, he doesn't really say much at all, come to think about it. You know, it could have been that Ghoulia was just happy that Slow Mo is the student dis-embody president now, and his first order of business was the zombie-themed dance.

I think "on going" means the same n'est-ce-pas? No matter-tell me what you are thinking of wearing to the dance. Should it be for the formal occasion or something in which one could rock out?

Certainly, if one wishes to avoid giving the impression of a certain reticence regarding her intentions to participate in the activities surrounding this type of social event, then a more lively fashion would be in order. One would not wish to be tagged with the sobriquet "wallflower" vis-à-vis other more stylishly dressed participants for, as some monster once said, "The brightest blossoms attract the most bees," if you understand my meaning.

Not really. I know that sobriquet means how do you call it... "nickname" and vis-à-vis means "to compare to", but the rest of this message is très étrange. In Scaris, we had many beautiful flowers that grew up the walls of my home and the bees we had as well, but I am not sure about the rest.

I was merely trying to convey the idea that when one's inner beauty is displayed in an outward fashion, it indicates a willingness to partake in the festivities at hand. Please accept my apologies if the concept I was attempting to elucidate was indecipherable.

Not at all, mon amie. Clearly, the fault lies with me. Your prose was certainly sufficient to enlighten. Perhaps, I was merely entangled by the quandary I find myself in regarding our mode of dress for the upcoming festivities.

Ah, well, let us adjourn us from this classroom then and find a conveyance to the maul. I believe it is a destination where that will bring a measure of clarity to this dilemma.

#fromrochelleandvenus #fromrochelle #fromvenus #rochelle goyle #venus mcflytrap #ghoulia yelps #deuce gorgon #slo mo mortavitch #zombie shake diaries #randvzs #year04 #all

1 note · View note

finrays · 2 years

Text

And now... as the kids say... shit gets real.

Enter our antagonist.

I’m hoping to get another part done tonight too, since I have to work on the boat tomorrow, and then my family is in town... so I can leave you all on a delicious cliffhanger >:)

“Hkkk! It’s…”

Setting down the spoon and carefully avoiding trailing the edge of her sleeve through the mess on the cooktop (the damn shirt costs almost a week’s wages, and it’s her only one), Elisabet pulls a face at the cook.

“It’s really sweet, Fred.”

Without looking up from his work, Fred lets out a grunt of acknowledgement, shifting the cigar clenched in his teeth from one side of his mouth to the other with practiced ease.

“So? The boss man likes it sweet.”

He’s right… she knows it, and she gives way without a fight; it’s not worth spending the energy on, anyway. Not when she still has the whole night of work ahead of her.

Fred seems to know it, too; finally looking up from the saucepan he’s been carefully stirring, he reaches out to give her a light push on the shoulder.

“You takin’ dinner shift tonight? We got ‘bout an hour. Get some air, guppy. You won’t have a chance when the rich fuckers get started on you; like to keep the help on their toes, those ones. And I’ll make sure to set sommat aside for you for later. Something that ain’t drowning in sugar. Now, go on. Git!”

Gratefully, Elisabet takes the opportunity, giving him a look of thanks as she ties off her apron, scuttling around a trash can and a set of steam trays, and out of the cramped galley, onto the yacht’s deck. Out here, under the open sky, she finally feels some of the tension drain from her shoulders.

This is about as low as I’ve sunk, I think. Eighteen years past my PhD and serving drinks on a yacht just to stay close to the water… ugh. I’m glad Mom isn’t around to see this. Some kid I turned out to be.

With just a bit of searching, and a few quiet nods to coworkers on smoke breaks, or their own evening constitutionals, she finds a quiet spot along the stern, leaning against the railing, arms folded loosely over each other, and gazing out over the open water. Moonlight glimmers like silver on the calmly rippling surface, and waves lap gently against the distant tops of the coral formations back on the shelf, nearly exposed to the air as the tide falls.

At least he’s avoiding the reefs. Something about romanticizing dinner over the trench, I guess. He’s a pain in the ass, but he’s not a terrible guy, I guess.

She finds her thoughts drifting, as they always seem to do when she manages to land a job that takes her close to the water again, to the night that had buried her career for good. It had been hard for Faro Fisheries to pin her with a charge of theft when they refused to elucidate exactly what it was she had stolen, and what the monetary value of said item would be. It hadn’t been hard for them to pull as many strings as the CEO’s wealth would allow, and blacklist her from the industry entirely.

But, even fifteen years and not one steady job later, Elisabet still can’t regret it. Not when she thinks about the mermaid, with her glittering scales and shy smile. Of those luminous eyes, so full of joy and hope at the sight of the open water…

The boat lurches to a sudden halt, scuttling her thoughts like a shipwreck, and she clutches for the railing, staggering halfway to her knees before she catches herself.

Damn! Did we hit the reef?

But… no. They’re too far out for that, still hovering over the trench, with fathoms of water between them and anything they could have possibly run aground on. It can’t be that.

She’s considering engine trouble as a source when the boat jerks again, this time from side to side. And then again, the port gunwale rising up briefly out of the water before slapping back down, the railing dipping crazily toward the ocean. From all across the ship, now, voices are beginning to call out, cursing, shouting, letting out cries of fear and alarm.

That’s not engine failure, either! What’s going ON here!?

The yacht jerks one more time, listing to port again, before coming to an abrupt halt. There’s a sharp, splintering crack from somewhere below the waterline. For an instant, the entire world seems to slow to a stop. To hold its breath.

And with an unceremonious shredding sound, the deck crumbles beneath her feet, railing and wood parting and plunging into the waves below, taking her with it in a hail of splinters and metal fittings.

Thrashing upward among the jetsam and breaking the surface, Elisabet splutters for air, head whipping about, struggling to get her bearings. The yacht has been utterly sundered, ripped in two by some unseen, mighty force, and each half of the boat is beginning to sink at its own pace. On the deck, panic has broken out, the shapes of passengers and employees alike racing to and fro, hauling life jackets and emergency supplies from their places, cursing and screaming and shouting in a myriad of voices. Sucking in a deep breath, she readies to call out to them for help.

Abruptly, something seizes her by the ankle and pulls. She has just enough time to gulp back her shout before her head plunges under the surface, and she finds herself face to face with a nightmare.

The thing, whatever it is, is nearly completely translucent; veins and arteries bulge beneath its taut, glassy skin, and the structure of its skeleton stands out in sharp relief. A few wisps of hair cling stubbornly to its otherwise smooth, bald skull, and she swears that she can see the tattered remains of a cable-knit sweater, clinging to its torso.The back half of it is armored and covered in a myriad of spindly legs, reminiscent of a crustacean of some sort, and crusted in barnacles and waving tubeworms that have burrowed into the bone-white plates. Long, translucent teeth, reminiscent of the maw of a dragonfish, snap at her face as the creature reaches for her with its reed-thin claws, regarding her with a pair of dead, moon-pale eyes, devoid of pupil and iris, and glowing faintly in the darkness of the midnight sea.

Without thinking, she brings up her feet, planting them on the creature’s wretched face and kicking off with all of her might. The motion snaps its head back, and pulls the loafers off, sending them spinning through the water between them, and setting her waist apron flapping. But the loss of shoes is hardly a hindrance. The motion buys her some distance, and she thrashes wildly away from the beast, struggling through the dark water, and then turning her attention upward, toward the surface above.

There we go!

Reorienting herself, she kicks for air, stretching an arm toward the glimmer of moonlight on the water above…

…until, in an instant, it’s blotted out, limning a dark, massive shape that hovers between her and the life-giving air above.

The shape reminds her vaguely of the mermaid… of her mermaid. But that’s where the similarities end. This thing is twice as long again as the yacht, its pale, slippery hide riddled with scars that form faintly-glowing runic patterns, running together like crashing waves. Sharp, needle-like teeth spill over and out of its mouth, too large to fit within its lips, and similarly thin, wicked quills bristle all along its spine. She can just barely make out the ragged caudal fin at the end of its long, muscular tail, flittering like a gossamer burial shroud in the depths below.

And the eyes… where her mermaid’s eyes had been luminously kind, this beast of the deep’s eyes and ragged gill slits glow with a baleful red light, like the heart of a distant, angry star.

This, she realizes, cold fear seizing her in an icy grip, is the creature that scuttled the yacht, with barely any effort at all.

And its lamplike eyes are fixed firmly on her face.

You…

The word isn’t so much spoken as forced into her head, and she recoils, kicking back and away frantically.

It’s not enough; the massive tail swings up behind her, slamming into her back and shoulders, and propelling her forward into the creature’s hands. Talons close around her like a cage, and one huge, luminous eye studies her balefully from above.

She wants to scream. But all that comes out is a pathetic squeak of fear and a small puff of bubbles. Precious air, lost.

You bear her mark… you!?

The horrendous thing rattles with laughter, a sound like bones clattering over each other in the depths of a cauldron, and Elisabet cowers away from the toothy maw, backing up until she runs into the curves of the giant claws.

Pathetic. I always knew she was too soft. But to place a human under her protection? She has fallen too far. Well. I cannot violate the deep magics. I will not kill you. But…

One of the massive wrists flexes upward, and a wickedly barbed stinger the size of a boat hook emerges from a pocket in the flesh. Wisps of glowing fluid drift lazily from its tip.

That doesn’t mean I’ll spare you entirely.

The pain is blinding, and this time, she can’t keep the scream back, losing her air in a cloud of frantic bubbles. It hardly matters, now; not with the sear of whatever venom the stinger contains now setting her nerves on fire. Her hands scrabble uselessly at the barb buried in her side, but the strength is rapidly leaving them, along with the air, and the will to fight.

There. I’ve given you chance to survive. And if you do…

She barely notices when the creature releases her into the water like so much jetsam, the wake of its passage spinning her over and away as it turns to pick its way languidly through the wreckage, and the scores of pale-eyed creatures rising around it, seizing the weakly struggling bodies of the crew and digging long teeth into their faces and necks.

You’ll see me again.

#-Ralph voice- hehe I'm in danger :)#gnarly abyssal zone mermaids? in the FISHERIES SCIENTIST'S LEXICON? it's more likely than you think!#three guesses what this one is named it's not hard #Blue Horizon

15 notes · View notes