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#its just GOD. yknow??????
skitskatdacat63 · 6 months
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— Emperor Charles VI's diary entry on Count Althann's death
[text: "My only heart, my comfort, my most faithful servant, my soulmate, who loved me dearly as I did him for 19 years, [we] had a true friendship, we were one heart and one soul, and we never concealed anything from one another. He will always be in my heart, [my] beloved friend..I. have lost everything."]
#this is like. incredibly niche.#but also hopefully a quote one can look at without context and still feel emotional damage about#idk. i think about this quote probably at least once a week and then have to stare at it and cry a bit#its just GOD. yknow??????#theres this one paper(which i linked) that i originally read as research for the AU#but i go back to it probably twice a month to reread it bcs im so !!!! abt it#i think its cause charles vi is just not that relevant but is relevant to me so to have this paper abt his personal relationships is very !#its both nice as ref for the au but also very interesting to hear about historical queer relationships/dynamics#the sections about him and his wife are very endearing as well#but god like him and count althann. im literally so invested in this 300 year old relationship#this is obviously from his death which is incredibly depressing and heart wrenching to me#but the other things he wrote about althann in his diary are very sweet to me#they were inseparable to the point of often sleeping in the same bed and charles called him his 'eternal love'#AND ON ALTHANN'S DE WIKIPEDIA PAGE IT LITERALLY CALLS HIM THE EMPEROR'S FAVORITE#anyways literally every part of this quote absolutely destroys me but especially how he refers to althann and then the ending#and its interesting to me bcs apparently his diary entries were usually pretty to the point#but when various people in his as althann died he would write these extremely emotional entries that are so </3#if you have any questions abt their dynamic pls i will talk abt them 🥰🥰 i find it fascinating#theres a book about his diary but its in german and 500 pages and kinda hard to get hold in but maybe one day!!!#also in AU contexts: althann and charles vi would be mark and seb so take that as you will 🤭😭#as i said this is great for ref but also made me sooooo fucking invested in him#i have no idea how to tag this#historical#holy roman empire#emperor charles vi#catie.rambling.txt#historical quotes#habsburg#habsburg monarchy#ah wow if only my german prof could see me now. fucking...habsburg posting. why am i like this
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ofcowardiceandkings · 2 months
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tfw ur havin a convo with the neighbours and ur bf is in need of a cuddle ༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ
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nonranghaes · 4 days
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it's weird that you don't call out to jun when he comes into your apartment. jun knows that you know he was coming over at some point to spend time with you, and usually you greet him in some way when you hear the apartment door unlock. he's a little earlier than he planned, but you told him to 'come over whenever' and now he's a little worried that you didn't mean it. he quietly slips into the pair of slippers that stays here at your place, and makes his way further into your apartment to set down the bag of groceries he brought on your kitchen counter. your bedroom door is open, but the tiny room you use as a home office is open just a sliver.
he makes his way over, leaning in to listen for a moment... only to hear your voice. there's a little strain to it as you struggle through a sentence, and it clicks all at once: you're speaking chinese. albeit not very well (it's clear to jun that this is one-hundred percent new to you), but you're still trying. your pronunciation is a bit clumsy, but he can hear the way you try to use the right tone with what you're saying...
when did you start learning this much? jun had taught you little things in the past--the absolute basics, really, plus a few other little phrases that veer into his own cheesy need to hear you say sweet things--but this...? he steps back from the door. why hadn't you told him? you could have told him and he'd happily help you learn. but he trusts you: you must have your reasons to keep this a secret, so he won't push. he steps away, deciding to busy himself with getting ingredients put away--or set up for the two of you to cook together, in case you're hungry now.
then he knocks a cup into the sink, and immediately he hears you coming out of your office. relief crosses your face when you see it's just jun, and you lean against the open doorway.
"i didn't know you were here." you pause, and then he sees you get hit with realization. "... how long were you here?"
"i just got here," he says. it's technically the truth, isn't it? he's only been here for a few minutes. "were you working?"
you nod. "yeah. just had to answer a phone call," you lie to him, but he just nods and acts like he doesn't know that. you come up to his side, wrapping an arm around him. "is this for lunch?"
he leans over to you and presses a kiss against your cheek. "are you hungry?"
"mhm," you just snuggle in for a moment, enjoying his presence. "you should teach me more recipes you learned from your mom sometime."
jun finds himself smiling already. was that what this all was...? an attempt for you to understand him better? to show that you care for him so much that you want to know his culture, too? "i'd love to," he says softly, and wraps an arm around you to tug you closer to his side. "only if you teach me things you learned from your family, too."
then he'll make more efforts to understand you and your background, too. just to show you that he loves you as much as you love him.
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anonymouscheeses · 21 days
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Old sketch I decided to give line art and color. Will definitely NOT finish this but if I do thennnn iunno congrats on me finally finishing an abandoned sketch 😭
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dizzybizz · 2 months
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colored the page of little guys i did while watching drawfees charity stream
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huge euge
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beatcroc · 1 year
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pest control.
bonus:
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*UPDATE: i made a sequel
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lovesickeros · 2 months
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☆ love; heretical and divine
{☆} characters tsaritsa {☆} notes cult au, yandere, drabble, gender neutral reader {☆} warnings blood {☆} word count 0.8k
To love a God is heretical. It is an act of blasphemy– it is to drag them down from their throne of hollow gold, to topple the pedestal the worshipers uphold on their shoulders like lambs at the herders heel. It is the act of forcing them to their knees and ripping that beating heart of glorious gold and beautiful, cruel divinity from their chest, so pure it burns.
To love a God is to make them sin. To make them painfully, horribly human.
To love a God is to sin.
The love of a worshiper is no love at all, brilliant in its raw purity, untainted by sin. It is fear and obedience masked by adoration so overpowering it corrupts. It makes the lamb so unquestioning in it's faith it will never question the knife that cuts, the teeth that rip, the claws that tear. If the Creator deemed them unworthy of the very life crafted by their hands, then they must have committed a sin so grave there lay no salvation for their horrid soul.
But she is no worshiper– her lips speak of heresy as easily as she breathes, her words nothing but lies, cold and cruel like the ice that crawls along her skin like webs.
She loves a God like a lover should.
A damned sinner reaching longingly for the heavens.
She loves a God in the subtle brush of their lips, their muffled voices behind closed doors as they indulge in curiosity untamed. She is a sinner through and through, but she feels herself fall further with every brush of her hand across their cheeks, every touch she bestows upon them like a lover. She memorizes the imperfections of their body like memorizing a map– every scar, every mark, every line drawn on their body like a canvas, her touch the brush that stains the pristine white.
No devoted lamb shall ever see the painting they create in these stolen moments– it is for the eyes of a heretic so vile it makes them shudder, their body dirtied by the love of a woman so vile even their divinity is obscured by the ice.
The lambs may be satisfied with fleeting glimpses of gold and empty words from lips that guide them to the jaws of the wolves, but she is not. Her hands crave them like a starving hound, aching to touch that imperfect skin hidden by the veil of gold that obscures the painfully human body beneath. She longs to free them from the golden cage that binds them– to see their wings blot out the sky, their divinity tainted by sin and making them all the more beautiful for it.
It is a longing that leaves a festering wound that cannot heal, will not heal. Even if it could, she would not let it.
For as much as she tries, deny it as she may, she is no better then the blind lambs following the herder who holds a blade in their hand, glittering like gold in the sun, stained by dull red.
She is a fool, and what a fool they make of her with the touch of their hands against her skin– so cold it leaves frost on their fingertips. Yet they do not fear the cold, mapping out every inch of her imperfections, carved into her body by her own hands.
She has always been a heretic, cursing the divine until she could speak no more, but if divinity can be found in them – in this love that consumes, that burns her hands and her lips – then she is a Saint, praying at the altar until her throat bled.
But in the end, she has and will always be a cold woman with hands stained with blood. Until it is all she can taste, until it is all she can smell, until it is all she can feel. These hands of hers, heretical and divine, will bleed the God from their veins– she will become the wolf to their lamb until the rivers of Teyvat run gold with their ichor, until the gold bleeds into red, the taste of their divinity on her tongue.
Until she drags a God from their lofty throne and makes of them a monster.
There is no greater triumph to the heretic then to love a God into sin. To make a God sin to love.
To love is to be human, and they are no God.
Even if she must tear the gold from their very being until all that's left is something human. Even if Teyvat crumbles and decays, even if it begins over and over again..
She will do it again and again, until the gold can bleed no longer. Until her sins grow too great for Teyvat to contain.
To love a God is to devour, and be devoured. An endless cycle of sin that dulls the glow of gold into something new– something horrifying and divine, in it's own right. Something just as horrid as her, just as divinely corrupted by the sins she carries on her shoulders like a trophy, as gold as the sun and as cold as ice.
Divinity, carved into something human by love all consuming, until it all bleeds away and they begin their dance anew, for as many cycles as it takes.
An eternity, if she must, of dooming this world of theirs to fire and decay for a glimpse of the being snared by their golden shackles.
#sagau#genshin sagau#self aware genshin#genshin impact sagau#self aware genshin impact#genshin cult au#genshin impact cult au#fic tag#tsaritsa#tsaritsa x reader#rip 2 anyone who expected like. a normal fic lol. lmao.#im very normal abt the tsaritsa and love its so tasty#i left it very up to interpretation what like. actually happens but. yknow.#i just think tsaritsa being the god of love and not knowing how 2 love without being weird abt it is fun#also wanted to dig into the concept of reader being fundamentally changed by being the creator besides gold blood yknow#but the tsaritsa Knows its changed you and she hates it. she hates it but how does one destroy what is divine?#how do you destroy the very thing that has created you in its hands so cruel and kind?#ive really gone off the deep end huh#this is a warning 2 the normal ppl u might as well leave now. lol#lowkey going for her actually straight up eating u but decided that was too weird for my first fic in a while. had 2 tone it down#i also wanted to add a bit of a concept of the constant resets teyvat goes through and how it plays into the themes#the tsaritsa constantly stuck in a cycle of getting rid of your divinity to be with you as you actually are but teyvat “dies” shortly after#bc obvs ur not the creator afterward so it just croaks and then it all resets again and again#but its the tsaritsa we r talking abt do u think that stops her. NO#obvs still up 2 interpretation go wild this was just what i intended#can u tell i have a lot of feelings abt tsaritsa and concepts of love from her pov. haha. I PROMISE IM NORMAL#i am mentally well why do u ask#what warnings do i add here. dont open this fic ive lost it maybe. yeah#covid rewiring my brain or smth idk man
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senselessalchemist · 4 months
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The Beheaded makes a pitch
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luck-of-the-drawings · 3 months
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my TWO FAVORITE THINGS IN THE WORLD, VAMPIRES N COWBOYS... deacon keller is SUCH a fun character, hes charming and funny but ALSO formidable and STRONG when he feels he needsta be. i hope him and arthur can get a chance to talk more and be better friends. l ike really good friend s. . like. like really good f. hangon i gotta go i think i hauve rabies.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi suckening#jrwi suckening spoilers#deacon keller#arthur bennett#OOUGUGHHAAOGUguguhh i feel so cringe whenever i ship two characters. like theyre not even REAL#why cant i be more 'hyperfixated' on getting bitched or something. CHRIST. anwyay i want em to hold hands or smth. yknow. freak stuff.#SO DEACON KELLER!! HE OVERHEARD ARTHUR TALKIN ABT THIS PLACE GETTING ATTACKED.. WE SAW HIM APPROACHING#AND THEN THE WHOLE FEAST PORTION OF THE PARTY HAPPENED N HE GOT STUCK#BUT HE KNEEEWW HE OVERHEARD ARTHUR SOMEHOW!! i just think thats neat. hes dedicated to protecting his people. hes respectable!!#GOD he doesnt even have that much screen time but i LOVE HIMMM n his silly lil shadow steed named Sunshine.. like cmon.... ugh.....#hes sweet n hes funny and he CAARES about the things hes in charge of on some levels. he certainly does his best to look after his own.#god idk what else to write here other than how much hes been on my MMMIND lately. the doctors are still running diagnostiscs#i just think hes so neat... also i think its funny that hes afraid o snakes. OH YKNOW lemme just talk abt my damn art. first o all this too#SSSOOO LONG. WEEKS EVEN.IVE BEEN WORKIN ON IT SINCE EP 5 WAS ON PATREON.it was sposed to be justa buncha doodles but then it Evolved#idk man...cowboys are just so cool...especially w VAMP POWERS..fastest shot in the west for a REASON BABY...n with the red smoke#n the glowing eyes..CMOn thats so cool i hadta get my visions into reality. the eyes were inspired by the music video for RATTLESNAKE (kglw#that where the IM THE SERPENT lines come from.lyrics from tha song.ooh yeah i love kglw so much...i also have other hidden messages here#i like to hide things...ALSO ALSO. I HAD SO MUCH TROUBLE W SO MUCH O THIS. the two bits with arthur n deacon biting eachother. AGONY#POSES ARE SO HHARRDDD SAME WITH THAT doodle o arthur slammin deacons head into the ground. WEEKS to get that pose RIGHT. I BLED SO MUCH#OHH AND GUNS???COWBOYHATS?? HIS GAY LIL JACKET? W THE DANGLIES?? AGOONYYY IT TOOK SO LONG TO PERFECT IT..especialy guns. OUUUHH#i also dont draw mustaches enough... which sucks bc im weak for a good mustache... BUT i think im doing pretty well on that.#it was hard but yknow what!! i think i did good! i rly like how this all turned out!! EXCEPT FOR THA FUCKIN RIBBON BOW THING I FORGOT TODRA#IN THE TOP RIGHT... THAT I JSUT NOTICED...its fine its fine i dont care that much. this is good enough to FEAST upon so im content n happy.#anyway i gotta leave ina few hours to start TRAINING for my NEW JOB!! CHEER FOR ME!! TRUCK IS A BLACKJACK DEALER NOW!! IEAAAHHH BABYYYY!!!!#thanku for reading my weird lil scrolls i bury beneath my posts. if u leave tags i WILL absorb them. and feel joy.
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skitskatdacat63 · 7 months
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Please take my low effort shitpost of our two Aston flopboys
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Basically:
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buzzsawbrando · 23 days
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Things aren't as pretty on the inside.
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lotuslate · 11 months
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happy pride!! wangxian are in love!! 🏳️‍🌈
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jacenotjason · 7 months
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This is me completely ignoring the “studio is forcing frank and Julie to be a couple” theory bc it makes me sad:
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yb-cringe · 8 months
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honestly i think qfit gets very quickly attached- mostly because he's spent so long in 2b2t very rare to find anyone who gives much of a shit there, much less anyone who's excited to see your or care about your wellbeing.
all of this to say; i think that moment where tazercraft had escaped the prison and fit ran to go see them and they ran up to him cheering his name, crowding him, so excited to see him, just sealed the deal of; "actually these are my people now. thanks"
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mishapen-dear · 3 months
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Cant sleep so im thinking about ayhalo
I think its like. one sided. qaypierre WOULD smooch that demon and take him on dates. qbad would not recognize anything as a romantic gesture. aypierre could throw a bouquet of chocolate roses at him and bad would just be like ! thank you :}
like they love each other, absolutely. they TRUST each other, to the point where i’d even say it gets in the way of bad seeing aypierre as anything more than a good friend. that’s his guy. The dude always in his corner. Friend resource label: team mate (coparent) (down to help kidnap people). bad doesnt do classic romantic relationships- all of his relationships are INCREDIBLY queer, but the closest he usually gets to what others read as romance is a classic chewtoy4chewtoy dynamic. He LOVES to fuck with people and he loves to get fucked with and if there’s a nice jawline or pretty muscles included?? huge bonus !!
he’s got something- not kinder, with aypierre? not calmer, either, but stable, maybe. pierre has proven, over and over again, that he’s on bad’s side. Spying on tubbo, encouraging bad’s pranks, the kidnapping- i can’t call it a reliable dynamic, not with how paranoid bad is, even when he trusts, but there is still a feeling of understanding that, wherever pierre’s limits are for when he cant support bad (or genuinely turn against him), it hasnt been reached yet
aypierre, on the other hand, i dont know enough about to be absolutely sure but there are some Vibes. ironically, i think hes feeling like his relationships are unreliable. max was going to have their baby, and then he wasnt, and then he left him, then max fucking died. plus whatever is happening with him and ayrobot, which probably leaves him feeling like he cant rely on Himself. like he had, if not a little crush on bad, at least some Interest in him, before. as well as several islanders. i remember the days of the Bed Threat.
but thats part of it, too? because those flings didnt have that emotional connection, and i always got the sense that he started looking for that with maximus, to Love and Be Loved rather than pure lust. To care about someone, genuinely, and be cared about in return. but he didnt get that with the flings, and We know that max was using him, but i dont know if he did, but maybe he had a feeling about it and maybe he also had a feelinf about maximus’ feelings towards bad and maybe- there’s something about that? A little push of not-spite-not-projection onto bad.
because bad IS that reliability, right now. he’s a fucking gremlin. a bastard. a prankster silly guy. he trusts aypierre and aypierre trusts him and they dont share everything but so often, when it comes down to it, it is them against the world. them in the corner, caught, aypierre shouting about kissing as a cover for their crimes while bad runs giggling away from him.
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wackulart · 3 months
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there's somethin strange abt those boys......
god brother au sketches for funsies :]
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