#its not my fault the baby making stuff just keeps writing itself i swear

[talaok]

Until now

Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader

summary: It's Valentine's day morning, and your husband Joel is telling you all about what he's planned for the day, only he doesn't know you have a surprise of your own.

warnings: smut| oral sex (f receiving), edging if you squint, allusion to baby-making sex, and so much fluff you could drown in it. (No-outbreak!Joel but Sarah doesn't exist in this universe)

a/n: guys this is a lil cringe at times but i was listening to a real hero on repeat while i wrote it so forgive me but a bitch was feeling it

The first thing you felt were lips on your neck, his lips

then came the rest,

his arm wrapped around you, his body pressed to your back, his breath fanning over your neck, his beard stroking your skin, and when you opened your eyes, the soft glow of the morning sun shining through the curtains.

"morning beautiful" 

his voice was hoarse with sleep, muffled by your neck.

"good morning" you smiled, turning your head to look at him, at your handsome, caring, perfect husband who was the only person able to make you smile in the morning.

His deep brown eyes looked up to yours, and the moment they did, his lips turned upwards into a grin as he drank the image before him.

How you looked so beautiful just awake was only one of the many mysteries about you.

"Slept well?" he asked, leaning closer to ghost your lips

"very" You were miraculously able to mumble before he was kissing you like it was the last time he ever could.

His tongue explored and savored every inch of you with the same eagerness and need of teenagers making out for the first time, until a soft giggle climbed your throat, and he leaned away, his hunger satiated ever so little.

"I see someone's wide awake" You bit down a chuckle, repositioning your ass just to ever so slightly grind against the hardness probing from his boxers

he groaned in pleasure before his usual smug smirk took over "that?" he hummed, rubbing his cock against your backside and forcing a little gasp out of your throat "that's jus' what you do to me, sweetheart"

Although you were smiling, you rolled your eyes at that, but before you knew it he was kissing you again, his arm pushing you even closer to him, before he rolled you onto your back, and climbed on top of you.

"happy valentines day" he murmured, another quick peck landing on your lips.

"happy valentines day baby" 

He smiled then, like only you could make him, that same silly smile he didn't know he even had in him before he met you, before you opened his eyes to how amazing life could be, if you only let it.

He hummed as he started descending down your body, worshipping every inch of it with his lips, his tongue, his hands- while you squirmed underneath him, biting down every whimper that begged to be voiced.

"So are you finally gonna tell me what you've planned, mr. romantic?" you asked, your voice breathy as his face traveled to "his favorite place on earth" as he always liked to put it, alternatively called between your thighs.

"mhh" he hummed, licking the inside of your right thigh, making you moan out loud this time "first" he started, continuing to tease you, getting closer and closer to your core, but never really there, "first we're going to the bookstore" he murmured, softly kissing your mound, as a silly smile erupted on your face

"the one that just opened?" you asked, propping yourself on your elbows to get a better look at him

"of course" he smirked, chuckling softly at your reaction "I think you just got wetter"

"shut up" you laughed, but before you could say anything more, his tongue had started tasting you already.

"oh my god" 

"and you can buy as many books as you want" he continued explaining, as you panted beneath him, his mouth alternating between latching to your clit and exploring your slick slit "with no spending limit"

A louder moan spilled from your lips at that, and he smiled, amused.

"a-and then?" you inquired, your hand going to his locks, as you forced yourself to look at him, at your pretty husband bringing heaven to you with his mouth.

"and then we're going to the movie theater" he muttered between laps "They're showing a bunch of those god-awful rom-coms you like"

You giggled through the pleasure, through the happiness.

"You like them too Miller" you teased

"Mhh" he mocked, "Sure I do sugar"

Again, a laugh, the same one he'd never get tired of hearing

"You're a bad liar baby"

He didn't answer, he only started sucking your clit, and all your ability to form coherent sentences dissipated into thin air

"'m not so bad at everything at least" he smirked, slowing down again to torture you just a little longer.

"j-joel" you whined

"don't you wanna know the rest of my plan?"

"yes but later works too"

"agree to disagree," he said, licking your core again and again, until you were soaking the sheets "And then" he resumed from where he left off "we're going to dinner, but where is a surprise"

You were smiling like an idiot.

There he was, your husband telling you all about the day he'd planned just for you.

"You like my plan?"

"I love it baby" you beamed

"yeah?" he grinned, clearly happy "not as much as you're gonna like this"

And then, then in just a few moments, he had pushed you over the edge.

Because he knew your body better than you at this point.

You gripped his hair, nearly ripping them off of him, as you cried out his name over and over until your neighbors probably decided to write you another passive-aggressive note about the "obscene noises" you caused.

You were breathing heavily while he leaned up to cage your entire body with his, your eyes droopy and a sickly sweet beam on your lips matching his.

God what a fool you'd been when you thought you knew what love was. This- this is what love really is. Him. Joel Miller. He's true love.

He kissed you then, pulling you out of your own thoughts as he let you taste all of yourself on his tongue.

"I have a surprise for you too, you know?" you said, your hand on his cheek, softly stroking his beard.

"'s that right?" he smirked

"yup" you nodded, smiling although some tension was taking over your body 

But then again, when you looked into his eyes... at all the love and care in them... it all faded away.

"well first, I'm gonna make you breakfast mister" you murmured, your other hand on his back drawing soft circles "Heart-shaped pancakes and all"

"mhh how romantic" he hummed, kissing your forehead "Thank you sugar"

"and second..." you bit your lip, swallowing thickly 

"what?" he asked, noticing the shift in your demeanor

"I've stopped taking the pill Joel" you murmured "I want to start trying"

And just then, when you saw a spark ignite in his eyes and his mouth fall slack, you knew you didn't have any reason to worry.

You knew he wanted it,

he told you so, but you weren't ready yet, and as always, he had understood, never bringing it up again, until the moment you'd be ready too... until now

"A-Are you-"

"yes" you smiled, watching as slowly, his lips curled more and more into the biggest smile he ever smiled "I'm sure" you promised "I want to have a baby. I want to have your baby, Joel"

"I-" he didn't know what to say, he didn't know if he was dreaming, if he was still alive, he didn't know anything, anything except one thing:

"I love you" he breathed, his eyes blown wide with shock, with joy, with love "I love you so fucking much"

"i love you t-"

But you couldn't end the sentence because his lips were already devouring yours

"I'm gonna make you the pretties mama the world has ever seen darlin'"

Tears were pooling in your eyes as you answered

"better get to work then" you smiled "'cause I know this baby can't wait to meet his daddy"

[your-eternal-muse]

You Gave Her Your Sweater

Heather Series Part 11

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10

Bonus!:Readers Card Confession Bonus!:To Hold On, To Let Go, Spencers take Bonus!:Series Playlist

Summery: Reader runs into Heather while wearing Spencer’s sweater, solidifying the difference in their relationships.

Words: 1.5k

Warnings: Swearing, pregnancy, mentions of cheating

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Female!Reader

A/N: Okay guys, the next chapter is the last one! And I promise its gonna be so fucking long, and so fucking cute it’ll give you cavities. I’m gonna give you the good shit. The next couple weeks I might be a little slower at posting because I submitted an application for an apartment me and my sister want, and I’m fairly certain were gonna get it, so I’ll be busy packing and stuff. Thank you for your continued support!

~~~~~

I never liked grocery shopping.

I know it’s essential, but the task itself is so draining, so boring.

Even still, I can’t help but wander around, buying shit that looks good that I absolutely do not need.

I know you’re not supposed to go when you’re hungry, but I can’t help it.

I guess that’s an upside of being married to the man I am.

While one of his hands is situated in the back pocket of my jeans, the other holds a piece of paper that holds our grocery list, and he is a stickler for keeping to it.

He’s subtly leading me down the aisles as I push the cart, which is already half full of what we need.

Grocery shopping with Spencer is different.

It doesn’t feel like a chore when he’s with me.

It also cuts the time by at least half, because he doesn’t let me stray from the list. 

But I’ve had a special circumstance these past few months.

“You know what sounds so good right now?” I ask him, as he begins to lead me down the cereal aisle.

“What’s that baby?”

He removes his hand from my pocket, reaching up to grab a box off the top shelf.

“Shrimp. With cocktail sauce.”

My mouth starts to water just thinking about it.

He laughs, walking back to me, placing it in our cart.

“You hate shrimp.”

I roll my eyes. “I also hate pickles, but last week I couldn’t stop eating them. And besides,” I run my hands over my growing belly. “It’s not my fault.”

He smiles, shaking his head, coming forward to rest his hands on top of mine, leaning down and kissing the tip of my nose.

“I’ll go get you some. While you,” he slips the list into the front pocket of the sweatshirt I’m wearing. “Continue shopping.”

“Thank you, Spence.”

“Anything for my girls.”

His hands come to lift the hood over my head, pulling the string, shrinking it around my face.

“I’m never gonna get my sweatshirt back am I?”

I shake my head. “I’m gonna be buried in this thing.”

He rolls his eyes before leaning down and placing a gentle kiss on my lips.

“It looks better on you anyways. I’ll be right back.”

He turns and walks back down the aisle, only to turn back and say “Don’t stray from the list!”

I raise my hands defensively. “I won’t!”

I watch as he disappears around the corner before reaching into the cart and pulling out the box of cheerios, doing my best to place it back on the shelf.

“How can he like cheerios? Fuckin’ weirdo, Reese's Puffs are where it’s at.”

I grab the orange box, only pausing when I feel a kick against my side. 

“I’m gonna assume you agree with me. Cheerios are nasty. Don’t worry, we’ll make daddy see.”

Another movement, and my hand finds the place against my side, pressing lightly. “Okay, baby girl, mama still has to shop.”

“You’re wearing his sweater.”

I pause my movements, my hand still resting on my stomach.

It can’t be.

I mean it can, you do live in the same area that she does.

I turn, to see Heather standing in the middle of the aisle, her gaze falling down to my stomach, and then back up to the lettering across my chest that says ‘CalTech’.

I shove my hands into the front pocket, not really sure what to say. 

“I was cold, and I forgot mine at my place when he gave it to me.” I take my left hand out to brush some hair out of my face, letting her see the diamond ring that rests on my finger.

“He never offered one to me. Even when I forgot mine.” Her hands are in her front pockets of her jeans, and she doesn’t meet my eye.

I shrug. 

Is that supposed to make me feel bad for you?

“I don’t know what you want me to say to that, Heather.”

It’s quiet for a moment, as much as it can be in the middle of a grocery store. 

She’s the one to break the silence. “How far along are you?”

None of your fucking business bitch.

“6 months.” I cradle my stomach with my hands, smiling down at it. “We’re having a girl.”

She shuffles from side to side, running her hands over her jeans, her arms, through her hair.

I can’t help being proud of the fact that even six months pregnant, I still make her nervous. 

“You know, we talked about having kids. Or well, I talked.” It’s then that she finally meets my eye. “He told me he didn’t want any.”

I let a smirk slide over my face. “Spencer loves kids. Even before we got together he always said he wanted kids.” I look her up and down. “Guess he just didn’t want any with you.”

It’s been three years. It’s been a long time, and I know Spencer’s over her. I know I should throw her a bone, ease up on the sarcasm and poison laced words.

But she hurt him. She broke him. It took months for him to fully admit that he did love her in some way, shape or form, and that the betrayal of that love hurt. 

I would never forgive her for that, no matter what she did. No matter if he does.

The look of hurt passes over her face, but then a crying child is heard behind her and she turns. 

I look over her shoulder, and the man I saw that night at the bar is walking towards her with a spitting image of her in the seat. 

The child is crying over something I couldn’t really decipher, and I see her shoulders tense as his eyes meet mine.

I take in the ring on his finger, the one on hers, and finally look at how old her daughter is.

She knows, and turns back to me, panic slapped across her face.

“How old is she?”

She swallows, and her husband is trying to get her to stop crying. “She’s two and half.”

It doesn’t take a genius to figure out what that implies.

It’s just one thing after another, isn’t it?

“You gotta be kidding me. Are you fucking serious right now?” I cross my arms over my chest, cocking an eyebrow. 

She starts to pick at her cuticles. “I didn’t find out until after the divorce was finalized. My doctor said I got pregnant at the end of April.” 

She was pregnant with another man's baby for almost 2 and half months, while being married to him.

Buckle up baby, I’m about to rock this bitches shit for a second time.

“You were going to pass it off as his, weren’t you? You were going to fuck him, and than two weeks later tell him that you were pregnant.”

I take a step forward, anger boiling in my chest. “You know he’s a fucking genius right? He’d do the math in .2 seconds and figure it out? What is with you and thinking you can get away with this shit?”

He must have sensed a disturbance in the force, because not two seconds later he comes around the corner, holding my snack in his hands, only to pause when he takes in the scene. 

His eyes flicker to me, then to Heather, the baby, and finally the man, who is puffing his chest to try and appear like the alpha male he thinks he is.

His hands tighten around the container of shrimp, before walking past all three of them, coming to stand behind me, tossing the container into the cart, one hand back in my back pocket, the other in his front. 

He stares down Heather, his eyes going back to the child every couple of seconds. 

I know he’s doing the math in his head, and he figured it out probably faster than I did.

“Unbelievable.”

She pinches the bridge of her crooked nose, looking up to say something but I cut her off. 

“Don’t. You have nothing to prove to us. You made your choice, now you have to live with it.” I look at the man behind her.

“Not even half the man.”

Spencer turns towards me, his chest moving to contain laughter at the look on her face.

Not giving her a chance to get the last word, I turn, and push the cart down the rest of the aisle, turning it as I hear her start to yell at him and her daughter.

He pulls me into an empty one a few rows down, turning me to face him as he leans down and kisses me. 

I wish I could kiss him forever.

“I love you so much, you don’t even know.”

I grab his hands and place them on my stomach, where our daughter was making herself comfortable. “I think I have an idea.”

He laughs, his eyes not leaving my stomach as he feels her movements. 

After a few moments, he removes his hands, grabbing one of my own as he turns me back around to keep shopping. 

“Really?” He points to the box of Reese's Puffs. 

“What? The list said cereal, Reese's puffs are cereal!”

He shakes his head, kissing the top of my head. 

“Whatever you say, dear.”

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[lideria]

Loverboy. | YangYang

Request: hiiii i wanna request something bc i had inspiration but i dont really write things, something with yangyang being your brother’s best friend and your family goes swimming with him along but he’s really awkward around you because he likes you? i just find that really cute 😭

Author’s Note: I really like this? And I love the love YangYang’s getting? I have another request for YangYang and wow that makes me happy? Also keep in mind I’m an only child so I tried my best based on what I’ve seen lmao

Warnings: Swear words, mentions of drinking, not proofread I’m sorry I’m really bad at it. English is my second language so if there are any errors please excuse me! I think that should be it? Let me know if there is more!

Word Count: 3.832 kinda long

Genre: Fluff, sprinkles of Crack and Angst, yet another college!au but not dominantly I’d say, friends!au, whof*ckingknowshowtheyendup!au

Hope you enjoy it loves! Have a good morning/day/afternoon/evening/night, I’m heading off to sleep lol 💚

“YangYang, why don’t you come with us this time?”

There is a dead silence that occurs after your father speaks. The three of you had been hanging out— lounging around on the couches since the weather is too hot to do anything else— as you always do in the living room while your parents were outside grocery shopping for the coming trip, and this happened to be their greeting when they stepped into the house. Your father’s suggestion is lighthearted with a smile on his face, which is making the silence more unbearable than it has to be. “We’re just staying for the weekend. I think your parents would be okay with it, don’t you think?”

“Um, I don’t know,” YangYang answers quickly and rather awkwardly. He looks to his side when your brother nudges (more like jokingly kicks) his leg with his foot. “Just say yes man.”

You do not bother to look up from your phone at the conversation that is going on, because this conversation has been repeating itself for a couple of years now. The answer had always been no at the end— since YangYang had to work at the dance studio, in his defense. Two years ago was hectic because of all the college businesses that had to be taken care of, document work and moving in and what not, and last year had been the same because of your admission to college.

As far as you and your brother knows he does not have an excuse this time. Plus, the three of you do not have the chance to hang out as much anymore as all of your schools’ schedules fall on different times, so this could be one of the last times you get to hang out freely until next year.

You hear the subject of the question laugh slightly. “I guess my sister could use a little break from me,” It is then that you hear a shuffle, a more audible hit, and a grunt that follows from your brother’s best friend. “It’s literally three letters, you’re making things harder than they need to be.”

“It’s not like you don’t sleep over at ours anyway, what makes it different if it’s someplace else?” You ask, and the two boys turn to look at you. Lifting your finger to your temple and tapping it several times you smile at YangYang, knowing the peer pressure must get to him at this point— not to mention the very drunken sleepovers he had had in college he had told you guys about in apartments he had not known the residents of. Both your brother and you could play that card any time.

YangYang seems to recognize that. “When are we leaving, then?”

The next day, five in the morning. You put your luggages one by one into the car, having to place a couple of them in front of the backseats since the stuff you had taken for only three days had already occupied most of the space. YangYang looks surprisingly awake, more awake than you and your brother could ever look waking up at that time.

And as if it is not bad enough that you are awake at this time after barely an hour’s sleep last night (as you had procrastinated getting ready until you absolutely had to), your brother opens the back door and nods his head towards the seats. “C’mon. You’re sitting in the middle.”

“Why do you hate me so much?” The whine is one of desperation since on top of everything you also have to sit on the tightest and hardest seat. But your brother does not give into it. “I don’t hate you, we just need more leg room than you do.” Which is right, but annoying.

You are the first to sit down at your seat, your brother and YangYang following suit. The three of you sit in silence as your parents and YangYang’s speak to each other outside, laughing. You can hardly keep your eyes open but when you are about to put your earphones on and lay your head back to try and sleep, your brother decides to start speaking. He starts going on and on about his plans for the upcoming two and a half days as if he would have the time to do them all, and at one point he starts speaking of someone you know all too well.

When he does, you shoot your eyes open and turn to face him. “You’re gonna hang out with who?”

“Didn’t you hear? Was I not loud enough?” He raises his voice, which makes both you and YangYang hiss a little at his antic because it really is too early for whatever he is doing. “Fuck you, okay? I don’t care. Just don’t have your tongues down each other’s throats around me. That’s disgusting.”

“I apologized for that and it wasn’t even my fault.” He says just as your parents open the doors to their seats, prompting you to shut your mouths up. It annoyed you to all extents imaginable that he would be hanging out with his summer fling once again— not that you did not like them, but the fact that they would never commit to a full on relationship was incredibly annoying considering they do whatever they do every single summer.

He mumbles something about you being upset you are lonely as your mother starts the car and starts driving, and you elbow him in the side, eliciting a silent groan from him as YangYang chuckles at you two. You lay your head back, your neck incredibly uncomfortable— so you give up on it instantly and turn to YangYang.

“Can I lay my head on your shoulder? I’ll share my earphones with you.”

It takes him a while to respond, which is weird, but it is still too early in the morning after all. In the end, though, he gulps a little and nods saying of course. So you lay your head down on his shoulder that is arguably not any more comfortable than the headrest is but at least your head is laid at a reasonable angle. YangYang accepts the earphone you hand out to him, and places his elbow against the window, leaning his cheek against his knuckles as he starts watching the changing scenery.

You fall asleep within a few minutes.

The drive lasted only about four hours long, so when you arrived at the little baby blue cottage near the beach none of you were really awake. But that matter had to be thrown to some non-visitable place in your brain as there was much cleaning to do before any of you could even imagine walking down to the beach.

Your brother vacuums and YangYang mops the floors as you dust around and clean the windows, your parents take care of the groceries and switch the water and electricity on. Luckily the cottage is really small, barely a living room with a sofa and a love-seat pushed close to each other, a small and old TV, open-plan kitchen with little counter space, two small bedrooms— yours with a couple pull out couches— and a small bathroom with very limited space that could only fit one person at a time.

But it still holds a warm feeling to it not counting the heat outside. The kind that makes you feel all warm and lovely inside.

Even though the cottage is small, cleaning it up takes some time. It is already the afternoon by the time you are finished, which is really sad considering today is Saturday, and you would already be on your way back by Monday afternoon.

But you forget about it when YangYang walks into the bedroom the three of you would be staying in, seeing you cleaning the windows. He drops his bag on a couch before turning back at you. “I’m done with mopping.”

“That’s great.” You say, spraying more of the cleaning liquid to the glass before getting back to trying to get a stubborn stain off. “I can help you, if you’d like.”

“Ah,” The cloth drops to your leg as you huff because wow it is really hot. “I mean I think I’ll be done soon. You guys can get ready to go out I guess.”

Silence. The awkward kind, but the kind of awkward where you know he is hesitant to tell you something. Only one thing comes to your mind. “Did he—?” You cannot finish the sentence because of how damn angry the possibility makes you that your brother ditched you and his best friend from the first minute. “He said they’re only gonna greet each other and he’ll be meeting us at the beach.”

With a dramatic roll of your eyes, you get back to wiping. “If he’s so in love, why wouldn’t he just ask them out I swear this happens all the fucking time—“

YangYang starts laughing as you rant, and you join him after a while, half because your response to feeling pissed off is laughing and half because his low laugh is pretty damn contagious. After your laughs subside you throw the cloth on the windowsill because to all hell with that— if your brother gets to vacuum and immediately storm out, you get to go outside without taking the stain off the window. “Let’s just get ready.”

The beach is not crowded when you walk down, most probably because it is not the season yet for most people.

The waves are ginormous but you do not really care, the sea was mostly like this rather than not. Which is why you just put down your towel without so much as a glance at its way. YangYang does the same as you, helping you with the umbrella and making sure it would not budge in the wind. “Are you really not mad at my brother?” You ask as you put the last stone at the corner of your towel to secure it in place.

“Why would I be?” He looks completely unbothered, which kind of answers your question. “I don’t know, bros before hoes and all that,” You huff. “I’d be mad at him— I am mad at him.”

“We both know he’s kind of really head over heels. Doesn’t faze me,” YangYang chuckles as you bunch up some sand in your hand. “Plus, he was the one that asked your father to come here.”

“He was?” The sheer shock that you seem to show makes him laugh, eyes tracing over your face as he leans on his hand. “You didn’t know?”

“I didn’t,” You confirm, shaking your head side to side. “Why— no offense, but why would he encourage you to come along then?”

YangYang clears his throat a little and shrugs. “Emotional support if things go wrong, I guess.”

You laugh, shaking your head again. Then it hits you. “Wait, so he’s actually gonna ask them out?”

“Yeah, I mean they’d been kind of trying the long distance thing out this year. So I don’t even know if he has to ask them out.” There is a pause before he smiles. “I’m happy for him. At least one of us gets to have the relationship they want, even if it’s hard to have it.”

Your head snaps at him at that, a wide grin on your face. “Aw, you have someone you like?”

The question seems to fluster him immediately. He gets uncomfortable, you can feel it, as he shifts in his place and sniffs. He is all smiley when he turns his gaze towards the sea. “I do. But I don’t think it’ll happen.”

“Why is that? Tell me about them,” Your words only seem to corner him further, but you frankly cannot care. Knees close to your chest, you hug them closer, placing your chin on top of your knee. He looks at you briefly before letting out an airy chuckle and turning his gaze back to where it had been. “They’re just.. amazing. Witty and playful but also grounded. Good thing is we’re close, but yet we’re so far. That’s all I can say, really.”

You want to nag him about it, but he cuts you off before you can, his head perking up. “Oh, your parents are coming.”

He gets surprised when you spring up onto your feet urging him to do the same with your hand. He gets up too, and you take your beach attire as quickly as you can which prompts an all awkward cough from him, tugging at his t-shirt before taking your own piece of clothing off your neck. “If you don’t want to be interviewed for the next several hours we have to go swimming right now.” You explain, knowing your parents would keep him as a hostage for some conversation— topic most likely being how college is, if he is doing good in his classes, if he is happy with his life, what does he want to do in the future, any hopes and dreams; the topics were endless.

The two of you only say hello to your parents before rushing to the sea, jumping in without much preparation as the waves would have hit you first if you had not done it.

The water is really cold because of the current, but you still have your fun.

YangYang and you both help your parents cook that night after taking your showers, and even as you are eating, your brother does not return. After you finish your dinner and the two of you have some coffee, you start talking about how dancing is going for YangYang, and your brother does not return.

Even when you drag YangYang outside by his wrist, walking to the square filled with stands and shops, saying “I need enough ice cream to make me regret being born.” and eat said enough amount, regret ever bracing the surface of this earth as your companion does the same, and come back— your brother does not return.

Instead, he returns after YangYang and you prepare his bed for him on the ground and change into your pajamas one by one. To be exact, he returns when the two of you are having your final glasses of water before going to sleep.

YangYang and you had agreed on doing something for when he did return, so even as you are caught by surprise as you are sipping on your water, you force it down before starting to applaud your brother. His friend beside you lets out a laugh at you before joining. Your brother looks something between surprised and confused.

“You found your way home!” You shout, making your parents laugh all the way from their room (which is not that far from the kitchen given the cottage’s size). “You’ve grown so much, you can find directions on your own without us having to pick you up.” You place your hand on your chest for dramatic measures. “I’m so proud.”

“Shut up.” Although his voice comes out annoyed, your brother has a smile on his face that makes you happy. You lean on the counter as he walks over and fills up a glass of water for himself, looking up at him curiously— and a bit mischievously. With your elbow you nudge YangYang a bit, encouraging him to ask.

He does. “So, how’d it go?”

“It went so bad that I had to take a walk that ended up lasting a few hours— it went good. We missed each other.” As always with your brother, he has to be annoying while answering the question. He leaves to get ready for bed leaving the two of you behind.

You and YangYang only look at each other in annoyance, and you make him break in laughter when you mock your brother’s it went good, we missed each other.

The three of you are out the door the moment you finish your breakfast next morning.

You gather your towels, the umbrella, the volleyball and the frisbee for your full day at beach that you must make the most of before going back home the next day.

The waves seem more acceptable today although they are nowhere near calm, but again, you do not care. You place the towels down, YangYang helps with the umbrella again, and your brother sets up the snacks you had brought along. The small cooler sits in between the towels and under the umbrella’s shadow.

The three of you all decide that playing some volleyball and ultimate frisbee before getting into the water is a smart choice, so you play around for who knows how long. Sun shining bright and strong on your heads, sand burning the bottoms of your feet, the sea breeze hitting your faces; sometimes you laugh, sometimes you scream in frustration, sometimes you scream just because you want to. All three of you have your fair share of sand in your mouths and on your face after dipping countless times for the volleyball and the frisbee. You get a couple of sand burns on your feet, and YangYang scratches the side of his hand when he falls down after catching the frisbee and landing on a random piece of log that had washed up to the shore— most likely after a forest fire that brought the content with the sea current.

But you definitely have a burnout at some point and have a swim in the sea, a swim of unnecessary splash wars considering how big the waves are. The two boys keep dunking each other’s heads into the sea, having their own fun from time to time, being silly. The mood is up there the whole time as you join their competition on who will hold their handstand for the longest time which is weird as the waves knock you all over so it really depends on how far the wave is when you start your handstand.

And it only hits you just how much time has passed when all of you go back and wrap yourselves in towels and sit down to have a few snacks along with some beer that was packed in the cooler.

“It’s so hot,” YangYang complains, and upon placing a hand on his shoulder you can indeed say he is hot. Probably too hot. The best solution you have at that moment is holding the cold beer bottle against his back. Which makes him jump in his place, and gets you laughing. “That feels so good but it’s so cold!” He basically screams, and you urge your brother to do the same as what you are doing, reaching out for the ice in the cooler.

You notice how pink or rather red his back is when you put the ice in his t-shirt in an attempt to make an ice bag out of it. “You’ve burned,”  You let out with a laugh. “That’s gonna peel for sure.” And you place the makeshift bag on his back.

When you get back to the house your brother is the first to take a shower since he has a special someone he needs to see once more before he leaves for home and for another year of college.

YangYang sits on the lounge chair out on the porch with you stood behind him, putting on aloe vera burn cream on his burnt upper back. He groans sometimes but tries to hide it by laughing, and honestly you are grateful for that— because it really looks like it must be hurting a whole lot, and you do not like seeing people in pain. “You messed up big time loverboy.”

He chokes on his spit. “What?”

“What, what? You messed up because you didn’t put enough sunscreen, and you are crushing on someone— hence the loverboy.”

“Ah, yeah,” He mumbles. “True.”

Everyone is asleep.

At least everyone should be, but you are not.

Instead you are sat out on the porch, and on the lounge chair, with only a glass of water in your hands and your earphones placed on your ears as songs of all kinds play. The midnight breeze had been too inviting for you to not stay up, hearing the angry waves of the sea crash to the shore. In the distance there is a cargo ship (ships were frequent in the off-season and at nights since the beach was not much used), the only light source in sight.

The sky is already only ever so slightly turning into a brighter grey, signaling the coming of the morning. You still had half a day before having to return back to sitting at your middle seat for the four hour drive, then doing the laundry, and then slowly but surely getting back to chores and schoolwork, preparing for your return to the campus in the upcoming weeks.

But right now, you want to stay in this moment forever. This moment where everything is so silent and so peaceful without worry of school or work or anything, this moment where your parents still do not have to get back to work, this moment where your brother is still close to the person who he loves.

It feels selfish for you to even think of it, though. Because you know YangYang is not truly all that happy at this moment. He is still crushing on someone, someone who he knows he does not have much chance of being together with. And on top of that, he is doing it with a pretty bad burn on his back.

Maybe time must move on for him, then. Maybe as time moves on everything can fall in place a bit better.

But you definitely want time to stop again when someone pulls an earphone out of your ear. You jump a little in your seat, trying to make out the face in the dark before they speak. “Hey,” YangYang whispers. “You weren’t sleeping were you?”

“No,” You say as your heart beats, no signs of slowing. “You couldn’t sleep?”

He chuckles at the answer that will get repeated, and at the question that addresses the obvious. “No,” And he sits down on the seat you open up for him, the two of you sitting side to side, arms touching. “I’ve been thinking.”

“About?” He sighs, and you can tell it is shaky, but not in the sad way. You do not remember ever seeing him sad, for that matter. “About my feelings.”

“What about your feelings?” There is a huff that leaves him that is full of uncertainty, but it is less shaky than his sigh. Bravery, maybe. His eyes that are fixed on the ship turn to you, a smile on his face, and he has to take one more breath before he speaks, eyes once again trailing all over your face before landing on yours.

“I really like you. Have been for a long time. I just thought you should know.”

[flyswhumpcenter]

Nurse Café - Chapter 5/6: “Recovery is Nothing but a Filler Arc”

PREVIOUS CHAPTER / NEXT CHAPTER

Fic Summary: Life could have honesty been simpler than that for Hokuto, a second-year Liteature major. There’s, however, someone out there willing to just make it easier on him.

Fandom: Ensemble Stars! (College/Coffeeshop AU) Ships: HokuAn (Anzu/Hokuto)

AO3 version available here.

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Chapter Summary: Hokuto finds the process of recovery boring. This is a snippet into this very boredom.

Chapter Wordcount: 1.7K words.

Chapter Notes: Lmao @ my shitty updating schedule (which isn't a thing to begin with). It's technically filler content, but I felt bad about not having at least some snippets into a recovery process and, of course, more pining because who doesn't like pining. I like writing with a lot of sarcasm and this fic is the perfect occasion for it lol. My goal is to actually finish Nurse Café before 2020 rolls around, so we shall see if the last chapter comes out before the new year arrives! (I doubt it, but you know, a week can be enough for this).

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Recovery was a boring process. A necessary, absurdly boring process.

He supposed it depended on what you needed to recover from. If you only had to recover from a cold, it could be a good occasion to feel cosy: buried under the covers, a cup of hot chocolate in hand, watching some TV programs while a humidifier tried to keep your nose from clogging up… Alas, he wasn’t recovering from a cold at all and must have been in the most boring kind of recovery: the one where he wasn’t well enough to do anything interesting, but not dying enough not to be aware of how much he was wasting his time as he flopped in bed like a fish out of the water.

 At least, and yet a little to his dismay, his grandmother had insisted to watch over him when his friends couldn’t. Sure, she was out of her cast and had recovered her full mobility, but she shouldn’t have been there. He was supposed to do this thing on his own, not get babied all over again. It tasted like failure and disappointment in himself, as if the entire situation wasn’t worth being untrusting of his capabilities.

However, a major part of him was grateful for her to be such a watchful caretaker. It was his fault if he had landed there, he admitted to that fact without hesitation (albeit not without swallowing his pride in for good measure), so he could have been expected to fix his own mistake by himself like a good boy; and yet Grandma was here, tending to him each time he’d open his eyes during the day. He’d have to find a way to thank her later down the line…

 Truth be told, he was relieved that people were checking up on him. In that state of his, his body barely agreed to move out of the bed, and if it accepted, then it’d only be for short spurts of time. The festering headache raging in his skull really didn’t help in the slightest, instead profiting from his incredible vulnerability to do its thing. The more time went and the less he felt that way, usually trapped in a deep daze for most of the time, overthinking things when he was conscious enough to do that. A… fascinating time to be had in perspective, huh.

If it wasn’t Grandma, it was his friends from university. More exactly, two friends: Isara and Anzu. He had specifically for them not to tell anyone else, as he wanted to preserve a little bit of his credibility within the academic premise. It was mostly about food, medicine and cleaning stuff here and there. Before his glassy eyes, the papers on his floor finally disappeared, piling neatly on the desk as he heard conversations without participating. They made recovery less of a chore to go through.

 The only times where he didn’t feel like he was throwing his precious time of the window was when people came in and kept him intellectually awake. Day after day, for an entire week, his favourite moments were still those where Anzu was there, sitting on a chair next to him or simply minding her own business somewhere else in his flat. If his brain wasn’t too confused, she’d stay here more than Grandma and Isara, especially the second as he was permanently busy (he could swear he had heard Anzu making sure he too wasn’t overworked beyond his own mind. Isara only chuckled awkwardly at that).

He’d usually see her do things around, mostly her homework, sometimes something else. After spending almost an entire day sleeping and dazing when he wasn’t unconscious, he could finally truly watch her do things and hum some of her favourite pop songs. She was the most pleasant thing about his recovery, as he could spend some time with her without any major disturbance. He’d never admit it openly, though, because then he’d never see it get lived down.

It felt warmer whenever she was in the room too… Must have been his temperature and the awful sentiment it brought upon him.

 The first time he tried to rise out of bed, it was to help Anzu with putting away some groceries and pay her back for these, and she immediately dropped her bottle of dish soap to pin his shoulders back onto the mattress. Would have it not been such a situation, having her on top of him like that would have surely sent him into a daze; instead, Hokuto was glad to blame the sudden burn in his cheeks on what was left of his fever and shook the other ideas away. God, she did look like she was blushing as she realized how cliché their position had been, but it must have been out of embarrassment… Nothing more than that.

He did retry later in the day, after the nth nap he had taken in the last two days (at least, he thought it had been two days? He didn’t exactly have any screen to check the date on to set straight his scrambled perception of time). Once again, Anzu jumped on him, urging him not to overdo it, albeit they had come to a silent compromise: he could sit up now. It was unbelievable than even such a simple gesture still made his head spin like that. At least, it was stabilizing, so he figured his gyroscope had somewhat fixed itself. How fragile had he made himself, exactly?

 With some more patience, brought upon him by the screams of the body he couldn’t ignore much anymore and everyone’s smiles and words, he had finally reached a point where he could at least wash himself in peace and not risk opening his frontal lobe on the slippery tiles of the shower. If Grandma and Anzu still insisted to make him his food, he started biting back, albeit as hard as a new-born puppy, much to his chagrin and somewhat to Isara’s amusement.

 “I’ve never asked you about that, but I’m curious,” the latter asked him when the three of them were around his table with some fried noodles for dinner. “How in the hell did you put yourself in that situation, Hokuto? It really doesn’t resemble you to be this… careless?”

“Haven’t you asked me that before?”

“Mao has, but you may have… replied with nothing but nonsense, when he did…” Anzu chimed in, scratching her chin with an awkward smile.

He felt his embarrassment rise up in his throat again, but instead decided to clear his throat and brush it aside as much as possible.

“Things piled up, I suppose. I was making a presentation with a tight deadline and taking care of my grandmother who had broken her foot. It got out of control much more than I had anticipated.”

“Why didn’t you ask us to help then?” Isara seemed genuinely confused, or at least curious.

“Both Anzu and you were already busy, and I sincerely doubt Akehoshi would have made anything better for my grandma. Yuuki seemed busy enough as it was too, now that I think about it.”

Truth be told, Hokuto had no real answer to give and it must have felt by his two friends, considering the looks of disbelief they gave each other before realizing they’d both be late to class if they didn’t eat any faster.

 By the end of the week, life was finally back to what it should have been. It still hadn’t prevented Hokuto from disobeying doctor’s orders (he didn’t remember getting examined at any point, but if Anzu was telling him so, then it must have happened at some point…) and grabbing his laptop to write some mails here and there. Braving the headache the brightness of the screen was providing him with, he attempted explaining himself to his prof for his sudden disappearance with his presentation in hand.

Apparently, he had written nothing but gibberish, and that was more than enough to convey to the prof how unwell he had been. He guessed it was convenient, in a way…

 He made sure to thank everyone as much as possible. Unexpectedly, Grandma told him it was her mission as a grandparent to take care of him, especially after he had done so for her; and he felt too humbled to respond anything against that. Isara more or less told him the same, saying it was normal for friends to help each other and that they needed to do so anyway, that he didn’t mind. The amused smirk on this man’s lips as he said that more or less indicated that he had gotten some amusement out of the situation. As soon as he got noticed, though, Isara told him he had been worried and that it was good to see a buddy go back to normalcy. They agreed on that statement.

Still, how could he thank Anzu for all of her services? She had done a ton for him and he had no real way to get back to her on that. She had spent a lot of her precious time trying to fix his mistakes and didn’t spare her words when it came to convincing him that resting was what he truly needed and that it was okay for him not to force himself out of bed this quickly. It really didn’t help that his feelings were having a rave party in the back of his mind…

 “You don’t have to thank me or pay me back,” Anzu responded. “At least, don’t feel forced to do so. I was just happy to take care of a friend!”

The pink on her cheeks was back. Did he happen to still have some fever lingering and playing with his senses?

“I’m just glad you’re alright now. You really scared me when you collapsed like that, you know?”

“I’m pretty sure I do.”

“You better do! I don’t want to see that happen to you again, so I hope you’ve learnt the lesson… You’ll be fine from now on, right?”

“I should be. Thank you very much again, Anzu.”

“And you’re still welcome, it’s the third time you thank me in five minutes! Take care, okay? I’d hate to see you this sick again. See you soon!”

“See you soon.”

On that she left, her smile and her perfume leaving the premise of his previously fatigue-riddled flat. It made up for ideal circumstances to realize something: Hokuto was afraid he’d have to soon deal with a whole other kind of sickness.

[readingwebcomics]

Analyzing Questionable Content: Pages 101-150

While I’m all for body positivity Dora, that’s kind of public nudity. Most cities tend to frown on that. Although this IS your personal business you’re doing this in… I wonder what the law for that is? Like, do you have to pay for a permit to allow public nudity in a location you own? Or do city laws take precedent?

…I’m thinking about this too much, let’s move on.

Hey, it’s Raven again! Hi, Raven! And you thought I was kidding when I said the no-name character who showed up for all of one comic would come back as a regular character. This is part of the reason why I enjoy Jeph’s style – he can, and does, very easily take bit players he made for a single gag or to fulfill one role and flesh them out if he thinks they can serve a purpose or if they entertain him enough. The most famous example of this will be roughly 2900 comics from now so… holy shit, I just realized Bubbles is 1000 comics old! That’s crazy awesome!

Right. Sorry, some of you might not understand a word of what I just typed. Nevermind, moving right along.

Here we see the beginnings of Dora’s next character arc, if you’d like to call it that. I do have some questions about this as far as the in-universe time-scale goes, but I’ll touch on that later. Faye also invites Dora along to hang with her and Marten to indoctrinate her to the Hipster Lifestyle™ to serve two purposes: First, that their relationship as a boss and employee is relaxed enough that they’re comfortable doing this, telling us a lot about the way these two work together and the way this coffee shop is run without saying a lot. Second, this serves as the perfect in for Jeph to incorporate Dora into the main cast. From this point forward, Dora becomes a main secondary character, arguably a main character in her own right. The fact that she takes on a much more prominent role in this next batch of 50 comics and skyrockets to fourth-most frequent character is proof enough of that on its own, but we’ll touch on all that when we get to the data analysis at the end of this post.

Back with Marten, Steve is encouraging him to apologize to Faye. He offers a… novel solution to keep Marten from being the center of attention.

Seriously, the sheer, raw confidence on this guy alone is attractive as hell. And I’m only mildly ashamed to admit that to myself!

I hope you understand why I don’t need to explain why I should, nay, must provide this panel without any other context.

Same deal with this one.

And this comic puts me into hysterics every time I read it. I swear, this isn’t going to devolve into me just posting comics and saying “this is funny” or whatever. I just really, really like this progression of events right here. I wish we could see more of this Marten more often in modern QC – able to read a room quick enough to defuse the situation with absurdity or dry wit. It reminds us that, despite all evidence to the contrary, the boy does have a spine somewhere in that body.

And as immediate contrast, we jump here. This? This isn’t funny. This makes me not like Faye. This is actual abuse. And I know I talked about in the last post how including Faye retaliating against Marten physically and actually showing it happen in the comic rather than implying it with backfilling is the better method of storytelling but… Maybe it’s because she created a visible bruise, maybe it’s because of how candid she is about it, maybe it’s because of my own personal fucked-up past relationships (which admittedly never got physical but still), but this feels infinitely different than the Faye Jeph is trying to set up. He’ll have to do a damn good job in later comics to win me back to thinking Faye’s a likable character again.

Also Dora is definitely a woman of her word. I hope the coffee shop was empty right then. Actually, I hope it’s been a slow day from the point Faye started chasing her around with a dildo. Otherwise news might travel for all of the wrong reasons.

Faye tries to invite Dora over for festivities both as a friendly gesture because she expects her boss doesn’t get out much and because she wants to drag her from the dark abyss of Goth into the light of Hipster, only for her to turn the invitation down.

Not that it’s going to deter Faye, of course. Also, QC is in wide screen now. I have NO idea how that’s going to be represented on Tumblr considering how narrow my current theme at the time of writing is. Maybe I’ll change it, I dunno, I’m shit with this sort of thing. If you’re reading this and the page doesn’tlook like some faux notebook shit, I pulled myself together and fixed things. Go me.

Dora is being incredibly chill with this whole situation. Personally I’d be a hell of a lot more pissed. Although this does provide us with further insight to Faye’s character – someone who sees her next step, bulrushes her way towards it and has zero plans where to go after that until she arrives at her destination. She is aggressive and decisive, but to a fault as she doesn’t ever seem to really plan ahead. I’d say this makes her the perfect foil to Marten as someone who plans obsessively but never has the spine to go forward with anything but… Marten doesn’t really do much future-planning himself. He obsesses over little things and gets stuck in his own head, but he never really seems to look any further than maybe next week. Hm… I want all of us to keep this in mind for an offhand comment like, 500 or 600 comics from now. Trust me, it’ll make sense when we get to it.

And yet despite Faye’s self-assurance and aggressive nature, here she shows an outright refusal to accept or face the reality of the developing relationship between herself and Marten. Not just being coy, not just dancing around the issue, but straight-up not allowing herself to even consider what’s going down. Maybe I’m reading too much into this little exchange due to what I already know about her character, but this is an extremely unhealthy trait that speaks a lot to Faye’s character that she doesn’t want the world to see. We’ll be touching on this later.

I mostly like this comic for Marten and Pintsize’s reactions on the last panel. Marten makes a good straight man, and it’s not often we see Pintsize share that role either.

Faye you’re really not helping your case right now. Although it is interesting how hard Faye is showcases how into him Dora is, considering she has her own feelings for him and I highly doubt she’d be 100% cool with the two of them going off to make out.

So here we establish Anthro PCs relationships with humans – namely, they’re basically glorified pets. Pets that have human-level sapience. Don’t worry, Jeph comes to understand the unfortunate implications of this as well, and he goes on to change this in future comics. And by “change this” I mean “completely re-incorporate how AI works in this universe and establish QC as a near-future sci-fi setting.” But that’s not going to be for quite some time. For now, despite my poking fun at the horrific implications here, Jeph’s doing a good job taking the “funny robot sidekick” that’s supposed to be in every webcomic and creating proper lore behind it, making it feel like it belongs in this world rather than be used as a comic relief character and only a comic relief character.

Granted the Anthro PCs as a collective are going to be used as just comic relief right now but, y’know. Baby steps.

As said before, the fact that these guys are all fully sapient creatures makes the implications of this downright horrific. Also, that’s Ell. I have no idea if he ever comes back – I don’t remember him coming back at all – but I’m marking him down in the character statistics because he’s named.

This… actually has some interesting implications. Marten mentions needing Steve’s help with a date “the other day.” Does that mean he and Faye have known each other for an extremely short period of time? I highly doubt it, we’ve seen a number of times the time has moved from day to night, and the comic itself certainly implies at least a few weeks have passed. So unless by “the other day” Marten means “a month ago” then Marten has been dating women on the side while Faye’s been staying with him. That… seems extremely out of character for him considering the circumstances we’ve seen established in the comic thus far. Considering nothing else really comes from it and the fact if Marten was dating anyone on the side it would definitely be Dora, I’m going to go on the assumption Jeph simply made a mistake here and meant to say Marten was seeing someone a month or a few months back.

She’s cut off by Pintsize’s destructive laser that he’s using to assert himself as King among the Anthro PCs, don’t worry about it. What we should focus on instead is… well, this second panel here. On paper, this is really good. We’re getting some insight to Faye’s character here, the cracks in her mask are showing. We’re addressing the issue of her assaulting her friend and roommate, what she thinks about it, her current mindset and addressing that this is an actual problem. She’s openly apologizing, sincere in her conviction and clearly wants to fix things.

The problem with this is of course the fact that this is rushed as fuck.

Part of this, of course, has to be the fact that Jeph’s comic by nature is married to the structure of a four-panel comic. We have to set up Faye’s conversation, allow her to continue, but due to narrative convenience she needs to be cut off before she can finish what she’s saying. So the laser cuts her off and after the panel of action, we follow-up and end with the punchline of Pintsize having been made King among the Anthro PCs. And I get it – interrupt Faye before she can finish so you can keep the romantic ambiguity of “boys whom I…” Classic RomCom stuff. Problem is, this isn’t the time or place to do it. Keeping to the structure traps them into a situation where unfortunately Faye doesn’t have the breathing room to stretch this out and make it feel natural. This feels contrived from every angle and every sense of the word.

Easy way to fix this: Have this conversation take place while they’re walking home. Establish she feels bad, have her bounce off Marten and have this conversation naturally. Then either you can have Pintsize cut her off at the end there or maybe even she stops herself when she realizes she’s saying too much. There are ways to make this feel natural. This isn’t natural. Still, credit where it’s due, they’re at least touching on this topic here. Part of me wonders if Jeph had, like, a mental map of where he wanted Faye’s character to go but because he writes these page-by-page it ended up stumbling along and falling flat. A written outline of events can, and does, REALLY help in situations like this.

Then again I’m giving writing advice to a version of someone who existed fifteen years ago. I’m sure he’s got this all down himself nowadays, right?

Payoff to the previous comic.

Not only does this crack me up every time I read it, it also shows that Faye and Marten have gotten onto the same wavelength of humor. They’re also comfortable enough with each other that they can imply for a moment sexual favors before completely derailing the implication with the absurd. This is a far-cry from when Faye was trying to burn Marten with her mind back when Pintsize merely implied the two of them share a bed with each other.

Granted, it does kind of fly in the face of Faye’s reaction back at the LANPark. Still, good moment.

Speaking of Faye’s character…

Here we have Faye’s explanation for why she hides her southern accent. Makes sense.

And here, her explanation as to why she doesn’t use contractions… I’ve already said my piece on why I feel this makes zero sense, let’s move on.

And here we properly draw attention to Faye’s scar and establish the fact that her scar is a sore spot for her… was that a pun? It felt like a pun. Anyway, more and more it’s becoming clear that despite her outgoing nature, Faye has a LOT she keeps close to her chest.

Okay now I know that one was a pun, I’m sorry.

Point being, there’s a lot to Faye’s character we haven’t found out yet, plenty yet to explore in future comics. And I’d also like to point out, this? This is an extremely natural way to establish things about Faye, right here. This feels like something that would actually come up in a conversation rather than planted there for the sake of the audience, and I appreciate that. That said, this in conjunction with the last few moments makes this feel more like it’s time for Jeph to introduce and explain aspects of Faye’s character all at once, which deters a little bit from the natural feeling of this moment in particular. Or maybe I’m just being pedantic, I dunno. In a bubble, this comic works.

And here we get a flash of the personality we’ll see in Raven in the future. Just a spark though, the flame hasn’t risen up quite yet. Also a little detail about Dora that… again, doesn’t quite make sense given the timescale Jeph has established. I’ll touch on it later in this post when we find out exactly how old Dora is.

This… is an aspect of Marten’s personality that we never really touch on. Actually, this kind of goes toe-in-toe with his interest in Final Fantasy. Is Marten a fantasy buff? Does he enjoy escapist literature and media? Would he be super into Game of Thrones when it comes out as a series? These are questions that… unfortunately, don’t really get answered. I don’t know, I feel like these aspects of who Marten is ends up getting forgotten on the cutting room floor later on in the comic. Maybe they were only included as an off-handed joke, maybe Marten just developed as a character differently than what Jeph originally envisioned him as. Either way, these are parts of him that I think would be wonderful to bring back, especially with his current job and relationship in present-day coics.

Again, like a LOT of things I’m bringing up, we’ll get to that later.

In case you forgot that Faye is genuinely interested in Marten, a reminder and an assertion: She isn’t just interested in the skinny boy. She’s got it bad for him.

But, like a lot of things involving her personal life and feelings, she openly refutes them – not just to Dora but to herself.

Having gone out to give Dora a new look and indoctrinate her into the Cult of Hipster, Dora McPalerThanWhiteBread ends up sunburnt. Marten’s home, he has the lotion, we all know where this is going.

Heaven holds a place for those who pray… I wanted to follow this up with a clip of Sonic from Tails’ story in Sonic Adventure saying “hey hey hey” but surprisingly enough, that particular soundbite isn’t available anywhere. There are plenty of Let’s Plays that poke fun at it, but nothing with that line in particular.

Anyway, let’s talk about time frames. Dora said she got into the whole goth and coven stuff in High School and only now gotten bored of it. She’s 26. Let’s be EXTRA generous and assume she got into it in Senior Year, and she graduated at 18. That’s eight years this has been her life style, almost a third of her life. This wasn’t a phase, this was a genuine life style choice. Either Jeph got the timing wrong, or this is genuinely an identity crisis on Dora’s part because seriously, when something’s been a part of your life for so long I don’t blame you for not knowing where to go from there. I’m just surprised it took 8+ years for her to get sick of it. Then again, maybe that’s normal. I dunno, you can tell me if that’s a normal human thing. I’m literally autistic so I genuinely don’t know.

Setup… and also begging the question why you would give a libido to an AI, or how one would develop it naturally seeing as robots are incapable of sexual reproduction.

I haven’t really mentioned it until now, but Dora’s like aggressively bi. I can dig it. Guys and gals are both pretty in their own ways.

Ignore the lack of color for a second, Jeph wrote up this comic when he had like zero time and couldn’t color it in before he uploaded. Again, we have the HINT of something that Faye’s on the cusp of admitting that says more about her character only to be cut off once again. This feels a bit more natural than the situation at the LANPark. Still contrived by nature of Jeph introducing a conflict to purposefully cut her off, but an understandable narrative contrivance.

Also, remember when I mentioned the joke about the government level laser would come back as an actual plot point? Did you think I was joking? No, here we have Agent Turing (I can’t tell if that’s clever or if I should roll my eyes at this) here to take Pintsize in, dismantle him and take the dangerous laser back.

Faye takes it well.

Can you guess what consequences she suffers from assaulting a government agent? I’ll give you a hint – it’s about the same as the consequences she suffered from burning down an apartment.

Payoff.

And finally, we round off this batch of comics with Faye’s expert lying skills to fool Agent Turing…

Ah yes. The ever-deadly Space Owls. Not nearly as scary as Space Bears, though! They’re horrifying!

…not buying it? Yeah neither did my professors back in college.

As per usual, let’s compare a panel from the first and last comics in the batch to see how Jeph’s art style has improved.

It looks like he’s trying to get the proportions more… realistic? They’ve moved from “cartoons” to “cartoon versions of actual people” and it’s… eh, alright I guess? Personally I’m more of a fan of the more cartoon-ish style in the beginning of this batch, but beauty and eyes of beholders and all.

So overall, what did I think of this batch of comics? Personally, I think the humor is improving dramatically, this batch had the most comics that had me laughing aloud so far. And bringing Dora further into the limelight was a smart move on Jeph’s part – she’s just so likable, I want to see more of her. But as for the inter-personal conflicts… eh? It feels weaker than last batch. More is happening, progress is being made, but it feels… contrived. Artificial. It was the worst in the LANPark, but because that drew my eye I kept seeing every other piece of exposition as just that – exposition. Maybe I’m biased, I’ll fully admit that. I’ll also admit that the bit about Faye’s chest-scar was a well done piece of exposition without feeling like exposition.

I’ve said exposition way too much now, let’s move onto the stats (and for the record, Scarlet Manuka on the QC forums was kind enough to remind me that the name of Dora’s cat is Miéville, so while we haven’t been introduced to that name yet I’ll be using that in my stats from this point forward because it’s better than “Dora’s Cat”).

Faye: 47/50 – 94%

Marten: 41/50 – 82%

Dora: 31/50 – 62%

Pintsize: 18/50 – 36%

Turing: 3/50 – 6%

Steve: 2/50 – 4%

Raven: 2/50 – 4%

Ell: 1/50 – 2%

Grand Total:

Marten: 132/150 – 88%

Faye: 130/150 – 86.7%

Pintsize: 45/150 – 30%

Dora: 39/150 – 26%

Steve: 16/150 – 10.7%

Sara: 7/150 – 4.7%

Raven: 3/150 – 2%

Turing: 3/150 – 2%

Jim: 2/150 – 1.3%

Scott: 2/150 – 1.3%

Miéville: 1/150 – 0.7%

Ell: 1/150 – 0.7%

Faye is climbing up the ranks and getting closer to perfectly equal screentime with Marten across the whole series. Speaking of Faye, in this batch she pulled into first as the character in the most comics, the first time she’s been in more than Marten since the beginning. And Dora’s been in so many this last batch, she jumped up to fourth-most reoccurring character juuust behind Pintsize.

I’ll catch you next week for the epic conclusion to the Pintsize laser saga! And yet more insight on Faye’s past – hope you like ice cream! See you then.

[arabellaflynn]

Monday Mystery: The Tylenol Murders

I recently found myself reduced to swearing and tears during a bad headache, when I discovered I had to break into a new bottle of medication to make it go away. If you've ever wondered why you have to gnaw your way through six layers of packaging to get at your painkillers, you can thank one particular homicidal twatwaffle in the Chicago area in 1982. If you can figure out who it was. On the 29th of September, 1982, a 12-year-old girl named Mary Kellerman stayed home sick from school. She felt lousy, and her parents gave her some Extra-Strength Tylenol capsules. She collapsed within minutes. Adam Janus, a 27-year-old postal worker, died the same day, in much the same fashion. Adam's family gathered at his house in the aftermath of his sudden death. His brother Stanley (25) and sister-in-law Theresa (19) took capsules from the very same bottle that evening. Neither survived. Mary Reiner, also 27, had just had a baby a week before. Paula Prince (35) was a flight attendant who stopped off to buy her fatal capsules at Walgreens. Mary McFarland, 31, worked for the phone company. All perfectly ordinary people, all killed stone cold dead with poisoned Tylenol capsules. The acetaminophen itself was fine, mind you. Someone had just opened the capsules and added a little cyanide to the mix. Well, a lot of cyanide. There's not really a reasonable dose of potassium cyanide, but if there were, the amount in those little pills would have been several orders of magnitude over it. There was a massive investigation, as you might expect; the FBI pursued several suspects, including the Unabomber, and a New York man who wrote a letter demanding money to make the killings stop, but never did manage to pin the crime on anyone. This case is famous for a number of reasons, aside from its status as one of the great American unsolved mysteries. It's  cited in industry as an example of how to ethically respond to a contamination crisis. It took the authorities a day or two to figure out that it was the Extra-Strength Tylenol at fault, and a day or two longer to decide that someone had probably tampered with the capsules at the consumer level and put them back onto store shelves. In between those two press releases, the manufacturer of Tylenol, Johnson & Johnson, mounted one of the quickest and most complete product recalls in modern corporate history. They pulled tens of millions of dollars of Tylenol products off the shelves within days. And once they were told that the case involved tampering at the retail end, they developed the multi-layer tamper-proof drug packaging we all know and curse. Ironically, there is a fair argument to be made that the murders weren't a case of retail tampering at all. The FBI decided it had to have been done at the store level because the affected bottles all came from different lots, and only came into geographic proximity when delivered to the stores near Chicago. Scott Bartz' book, The Tylenol Mafia, makes a decent case that, while the lots weren't produced in the same factories, they could have been brought together in a packaging facility instead, which bottled up and shipped tablets from a number of sources. [That was the part of the book I found convincing, mind you. Bartz also seems to think that there was some sort of cover up involved in keeping this from the American public, under the traditional conspiracy theorist logic that the best way to keep a secret is to involve a million people and then threaten them into silence, while doing nothing to suppress, discredit, or in fact pay any attention whatsoever to the dude who just published a book about it. I could fully believe that the executives at J&J had motive and possibly means to keep it under wraps, but I'd be much more inclined to believe hurried incompetence or tunnel vision from the FBI.] Mystery-wise, the sticking point of the case for me has always been Mary Reinert. The Extra-Strength capsules that killed her were from a small handful found at the top of a bottle of regular Tylenol, which her family said was what she normally took. No one seems to know where they came from. Did she buy them? If so, why? Clearly she already had Tylenol in the house. Why would she throw a few in the top of the regular bottle, and where did the rest of the Extra-Strength capsules go? If someone had given her a handful, why wouldn't they come forward? If it were me, I'd be running for the nearest police station, suspect bottle held as far in front of me as I could manage, begging the cops to take it away. It's been postulated that she had brought the medication home from the maternity ward, but that would mean she got her poisoned capsules a week before any of the other victims, and just happened to take them on the very same day. It's possible, but vanishingly unlikely. Whoever tampered with them would have needed to get into the hospital dispensary -- the room where, might I remind you, they also keep the fun drugs with street value, and therefore have a lot of security -- and sneak the poisoned Tylenol into an industrial-sized bottle of the stuff. Where it would have had to be coincidentally only issued to Reinert. I'd have looked at Mr. Reinert at that point, but apparently they did, and found absolutely no evidence he had anything to do with it. Someone else did have the bright idea to hide a spousal murder among some random homicides a few years later: Stella Nickell put cyanide into some Excedrin, which still came in regular capsules, and took out random victim Sue Snow on her way to killing off her own husband, Bruce. She would have gotten away with it, except that she contested the coroner's finding that Bruce had died of natural causes. Apparently his insurance had a bigger payout for accidental death, and she couldn't resist. Links: http://ift.tt/1LUeNT5 http://ift.tt/YmAGYC http://ift.tt/2oqT0Qw http://ift.tt/2obeD77 from Blogger http://ift.tt/2oqG4tU via IFTTT -------------------- Enjoy my writing? Consider becoming a Patron, subscribing via Kindle, or just toss a little something in my tip jar. Thanks!

[alverlanche]

                                BABES. I. AM. IN. SHOCK. 

honestly, when I revamped Lance I NEVER thought I would hit such a large milestone - or that I would find so many new friends by bringing him back!!! It warms my heart that so many people have given this hot headed dork so much love from a tv show from YEARS ago - so I thought I’d give some love back

So - before I get into the mushy gushy stuff. The giveaway. It’s not exactly your...usual type of giveaway? Pretty much if our characters have interacted/have a friendship/relationship you can send a lil  ❤ and I’ll made a small fanvideo of Lance and your muse! Obviously your character will need to have a live action or cartoon faceclaim (or be from the show) for me to do so - but I thought it would be kind of fun to try and do! So you can just send me a  ❤ in case you’re too shy to ask ooc and I’ll find a lil song (or you can send one in you think fits them!) and I’ll try my best to make a little video celebrating their relationship! Hence the Valentine themed giveaway which I bet totally flops lol :3

                   AND NOW THE MUSHY STUFF UNDER THE CUT!

@darcybby - ha. ok. you’ll pretty much be on every follow forever?? on any blog??? you’re gonna have to deal with that. you’ve been through four blogs with me now (I’m terrible) but even if we can’t interact on some of them I still adore chatting to you ooc! Did you know you’re the only person I actually talk to on skype??? the rest I just chat with. I’m sorry we’ve not called recently (damn anxiety) but I still know you’re there if I need you and I hope you feel the same way <3 

@prydefully - I have started shipping Lancitty in a way I never even thought I could tbh. AND ITS ALL YOUR FAULT! somehow a ship from a tv show which was very forced if we’re honest pushed by the writers for a romance between both sides of the teams has developed into one of the most damn. angsty. thing. I love it, I love it so much and I love talking to you ooc, you never fail to make me laugh over one thing or another <3 

@windsweptsilver​ - *drags hands across my face* can I just???? jesus, you’ve written Pietro for years, and it shows. each response  and reaction from Pietro is just spot on to what I think would be  from x-men evolutions version of Pietro. and as for headcanons - all of the ones you chat to me about make my heart hurt for him, and fit in around the shows screentime for him so well that I constantly find myself expecting some episodes to mention some of your ideas just because they fit so well. Lance and Pietro are such an interesting and fucked up relationship, I’m so happy we chat ooc about the dynamics of their relationship, as emotional as it makes me <3

@vestiica​ - how do I even?? shipping these two grumpy hot headed nerds wasn’t something I ever thought would happen - and yet here we are! well over a year later and after a blog revamp these two are still as weird and awkward as ever, and I wouldn’t have it any other way! (well....maybe I’d like them to get together properly soon - I mean, they need to sort their shit out XD) every thread we have I adore, and I only wish they had more interactions within the actual show! then again....maybe then I wouldn’t imagine them sharing pizza and learning how to swim in the way we’ve chatted about, which would be a tragedy in itself <3

@wildtsukai​ - THESE TWO I SWEAR. Lance and Toad are hilarious, and I’m so so so happy that you’re on tumblr to write with! You’re such a talented writer, you’ve gotten both sides of Todd down, the sad and the funny, Some of your backstory and headcanons make me pause and re-watch episodes with Todd’s lines, seeing them, in a completely different light, which honestly, is amazing. All of our threads have made me laugh multiple times if I’m honest, and I hope we can write them getting into more hijinks together <3  

@phcenixgirl​ - gah, another friendship that I adore Lance having! I mean...who’d of guessed Scott Summers spawn would be actually kind of cool? Lance certainly didn’t. But it’s brilliant, and I love our little threads ^^ but I also love our talks out of character,  even if recently its been me whining about my baby bro crying all the time <3 

@maximoffgirl / @multiplejamies / @idreamofjean - I still can’t believe I didn’t link your personal to your deviantart work to be honest, I’m almost ashamed of myself XD I love writing with you, on whichcever blog you have muse for really, and even if we haven’t started the thread on Jamie properly yet I’m sure I’ll love that too! ^^ Talking about evoltuion with you is so fun (and funny), especially when it’s about some of the reactions in the show, it’s always priceless! <3 

@bitebxck​ - *breaths heavily I don’t even know how to...gahhh, I adore your style of writing. Honestly, it’s so detailed and in depth, I’m always excited to see your replies when you’re done, even if I take FOREVER to respond back! I’m already super excited about writing on your other blog with you, so hopefully I’ll get round to that part of my drafts soon!! <3 

@welookoutforourown / @creepingnightmares - wellllll, lets just see how much I can gush about your art and your writing, shall we? seriously, I’m such a fan I’ve even showed a couple of friends your artwork because I think it’s so incredible (and they agree XD) and talked probably a little too much to them about how cute Maddy is! Her character is such a wonderful one, and you have an incredible way of writing her sweet character, while still being able to write Isaak as a very aggravating and cruel muse too - something that is honestly so impressive. I love seeing you on my dash, and I just wanna recommend you to all my followers <3  

@quiet-loudmouth - you followed me during a period where I was in a little bit of a rough patch...but every time I posted anything negative you came and chatted to me, and I honestly can’t thank you enough for that. you’re such a sweet person ooc, and your muse is also a total cutie, I knew I just had to write about you on my follow forever <3 

@runawaymutants​ - I’m gonna write about Elle because she’s the one I interact the most with ^^ I know you’re thinking about making me exclusive on skype, and even though I’m not too sure about roleplaying via skype I 100% would if it meant we could keep writing these two. They’re such cuties, I love every thread that we have together, and even if we swap it over to skype I still recommend that people follow you for your other oc Alec, who I don’t write with but I enjoy reading your threads with him all the time <3

@notaseasonsummers - ahhhh another person in the group categorized ‘muses I didn’t realize I would hardcore ship with Lance’! Seriously, Lance’s enemy's brother is just....wow. XD These two are such dorks with each other, and all of your christmas presents were so much fun every day that I think I love your muse even more now because of your blog! seriously, these bro’s are a top ship of mine involving Lance now <3

@vampirestakecareofourown​ - *flails awkwardly* I don’t want to keep repeating myself with the same compliments, but honestly, all of you are such incredible writers, so I have to say it for you too. Honestly, I love Gory and your portrayal, and I love how quickly our two muse are bonding and connecting. Add in the fun little comments and chats ooc and I'm just really grateful that you’re a mutual follower I consider a friend! <3 

@mypralaya - I know we don’t talk THAT much ooc, but I still just want to say that you’re another writer whose threads I enjoy immensely :) Though I’m painfully slow with replies at the moment, know that each thread and each muse you have are super interesting to me, especially since they’re less known than other xmen characters around ^^ I have to admit I’m especially fond of our thread on this account, and can’t wait to see what happens next! <3

@blindedleadingtheblind - well lets be honest, with Lance and Scott? You’re always going to make my list bahaha. Seriously, these two idiots and their ‘macho’ contests just make out already make me laugh so much. In fact, a lot of your asks and interactions are really fun and I ADORE seeing you on my dash! I hope we do more threads in the future <3

@sneakymystique - and last, but SO not least! the way you write Mystique is just....scary. scary GOOD, but still....poor Lance XD our threads have gotten him into a lot of shit so far, but really I wouldn’t have it any other way. Your Mystique is so manipulative and brutal, and such a perfect version of Evolution’s Mystique. Add in your little comments about Evolution tv show as a whole and you’re just a wonderful addition to my ever moving dash! <3

and now I just want to apologize to anyone who I haven’t written about here. there were honestly at least twenty more people I wanted to write about - but as you can probably see this post got waaaayyy too long, and these are people I chat with ooc and feel comfortable writing about. Just know that if I follow you, I adore your writing, your character and whatever threads we have going on. Happy Valentines Day! Mwah <3

[shattered-catalyst]

Worst fears: Drabble: rock dad

Shit so I had a dream nightmare and had to do a feeling induced Drabble. because ow my heart.  Cats worst fears come true and holy shit. Shitty writing as usual but I’m tired and writing this emotionally wore me out. I added a happy ending at the end for therapeutic reasons.

Warnings: tagging this triggering for numerous things, no one normally reads these so uhh pm if you need specifics?? Id say heavy despair. 

 Rock dad AU.

Per usual Cadre is indicated by < and > respectively.

Summary: They came to take back Isaslan 3 and got  a lot more out of him then they bargained for. And its all Julio Esteban fucking Richter’s fault. Fuck that guy.

Rictor’s voice was groggy, logical considering it was 3:45 in the morning. In fact Catalyst couldn’t even make out what his ‘father’ figure had said, it was just word grunts in three different languages. Of which he knew two. Glancing up from the phone he checked to make sure he had time to rouse Rictor’s brain. The splintered store front window was setting off the alarm. He had only a few seconds to issue his warning.

<Rictor. You must get Shatterstar and Julian to safety. Lord Mojo has tracked me down. They have come. You must stay awaa-> Shit!! He ducked as a well aimed shot ripped the phone and its receiver from the counter.

Thats not what made him swear under his breath. It was Scattershot stepping through the broken shop window that got his blood boiling. Oh shit. <Whats wrong? Don’t tell me you’re running?>

Oh that got the blood boiling, he unsheathed another pair of knives. < A true warrior never runs, you know this!>

He fucking should have run. In retrospect he should have high tailed it to Rictors apartment. Gotten help. Not acted like he would in the arena. He wasn’t alone anymore, but here he was fighting alone.

Sinkholes everywhere, shaken buildings, car alarms,  and downed power lines littered the south  side of mutant town. Looked like an earthquake had hit. It hadn’t, had just been him. Trying his damndest. But Scattershot had more experience and no amount of shaking the ground and wits was going to help him once Scattershot’s extensive back up arrived.

Damn he must’ve pissed someone off. Mojo,  Scattershot? Fekt pick one he’d done a lot. A lot they considered wrong. What he now knew for a fact was that he had done the right thing. He wasn’t backing down from that. Catalyst’s eyes remained on the ground, half whispering for her to answer him. He could figure out a way out of this; he knew it. He was smart enough, but could he pull it off without the use of his lower body? Maybe if his shoulder wasn’t splintered in several places he could use just his arms. But no. Thanks. Scattershot. Bitch.  

Two broken legs, a power dampener, and a hell of a lot of guards. Pretty sure his pelvis was down for the count. Lovely.  Fingers digging deep into the earth, leaving deep gouges. Feeling the grains digging into his finger nails. Desperately pleading with the ground to open and just swallow them. Aching for the ability to move it again. 

Wind picks up, portal opening, oh fekt no. His pleadings deepened in his uemeur; screaming for the earth to answer once more. It was silent, so very silent. His heart had never beaten this fast, he could feel the blood coursing through his head. The world sharpening to his senses as they fought to survive this. No he wasn’t going back. Not after all he had fought for. After all he’d fought to become. He wasn’t going back.

Now he’d tasted freedom-emotions. He will never be able to live without them, and he didnt know if he actually wanted to. Didn’t know if he wanted to live without Rictor in his life. That damn bastard ruined everything. Had Julio Esteban Richter not sidled into his life maybe he wouldn’t have fought so hard. But that asshole had to make things complicated and messy. Fuck him.

Thats when he heard the word ‘re-assimilate’. Oh. Fuck. No. No no no.

Now he felt it:Fear. Its claws ripping into his soul. It will be worse than the arena. It will be the arena AND worse. A motion picture show of horror began cycling through his mind, the torture awaiting him. They’d probably keep his power contained via technology the whole time. Possibly even a mind wipe. He didn’t want to forget. 

He had no idea what missing something felt like until that threat presented itself. Losing the memory of that stupid face. The way he almost punched Catalyst when they first met. Buckets of frogs and dirty hands. He refused to forget him. The first person to support him so fully; maybe to love him? How could he. How that stupid stupid smile started with a gleam in his brown eyes and spread to his mouth. Or the way he would explode with emotion about things. Fuck he’d even miss the tequila.

Tears were stinging his face. Oh god. The thought of losing even the memory of the first important person in his life was earth-shattering. A heavy sob ripped through his chest, he couldnt stop it. Not like he used to, stuff it down, and hide it from himself. He’d die before he went back. He’d die before he forgot him. 

“RICTOR!!” One sobbing scream echoed from his uemeur a crossed the empty lot. Bouncing helplessly off the buildings. He knew it would go unanswered. His uemeur splintered then and there.Ground heaving beneath mirroring his chest. Iridescent green flooding from his fingers. Fear. His powers activated on Fear. Pressure building, a loud snap resonated as the collar splintered.

Fissure ripping open the earth beneath their feet. Everything went black. He’d done it.

commercial break from bad writing: I had to give it a happy end my dream stopped there basically and transitions to rubber ducks so..Have a happy ending??

Light poured in. Eyes opening slowly, body tensing. He wasn’t on anything-someone was holding him close. His head against their neck as they walked, cradling him. Orange hair brushing against Cats face as he tried to move. He could feel the familiar heaviness of Rictor’s jacket around his own limbs, smelled the earth and leather. Trying to lift his head he stopped feeling a fissure of pain rip through him.  A hum vibrating through the mans throat, head moving.

“Julio.” Voice deep and strong. A faint Cadre accent, barely discernible. But that wasn’t what awoke him.

“He awake?”

The voice sent his mind racing. Earth, wet ground fertile and beautiful. Stable. Warm. Home. “R-rictor?” Gods his own voice sounded like shit compared to Rictor’s. The man was there, beside him burying a hand in his hair to ruffle it. Small smile gracing his features.

“Dumbass.”

Shoving off the red head he tackled Rictor. Worth the pain, so worth the pain.  Working arm latching tightly around his neck to grab his shirt. Hugging tightly. Burying his head against him trying to stop his chest from heaving. “They wanted me to forget you, papa.”

Comforting hands hoisted him up to hold his weight, however light it was. Supporting him. Caring for him. “Yeah well fuck those bastards.” Hand stroking his hair soothingly. “ We’re going home.”

“I’m already home.”

@shakeitrictor  : I put a mention of Julian in here but I didn’t want to add him in the last part without your permission. I can always edit and add your cute little baby later. Or remove him completely. In the dream Cat was worried about him getting caught up in this and I’m sure he’d come help bail out his baby brother.