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#its shitty what happened and ive only read whats happened but im in full support for those who have been banned or hurt from the situation
sprinklewinkles · 2 years
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i genuinely hope people who support neo classic rethink their subscriptions after this drama,,
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izusun · 3 years
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Goblin anon here absolutely screeching over feral quirkless Midoriya, it's everything I wanted
I would like to also introduce a brand (my brand) of feral to Midoriya: pyromaniac.
Imagine Midoriya getting through the entrance exam by saving people, but also by bringing makeshift Molotov cocktails and wrecking almost as much shop as Bakugou.
Imagine the battle trials where Bakugou tries to blow up the building because "that's the only way to keep this little shit down" and in response Midoriya dodges and then sets the building on fire.
Imagine the USJ incident, which goes about the same, but his first instinct is to set the Noumu on fire. Yes he does so. He also nearly sets the stadium on fire at the sports festival so much that they had to evacuate sections of the stadium.
Midoriya (say it with me now) sets Stain on fire. When Tsukauchi meets with the murder trio after the Hosu incident, he just sighs and is like "Midoriya, really?" And this is when we learn that Midoriya has a history of coming across random villains and setting them on fire. When Inko arrives to pick him up she's just like "You're grounded."
There's theories about what Midoriya's quirk, everything from increased intelligence to extremely shitty luck to the ability to make anything he touches explodes (due to his inane ability to make a bomb/lighter out of the most insane things). When it comes out that he's quirkless, it just makes everyone even more afraid, as Midoriya can make a bomb out of some LSD and a rubber duck quirkless-
Pyromaniac quirkless Midoriya.
- Goblin anon
GOBLIN ANON IT’S BEEN AGES IM SORRY IM JUST RESPONDING NOW (ive been so bad at responding asks my god i struggle but thank u for ur au dumps, i love loVE THEM SO MUCH!!!!)
IM IN LOVE WITH THIS AU
feral quirkless gremlin midoriya going through shit by setting things on fire is just the way to go im duwldjwksk
i read midoriya with molotov cocktails and i have not stopped simping for and thinking about this midoriya
genuinely swooning at this ver of him
midoriya probably has a collection of lighters and basically does those hand tricks to calm him down or to take his mind off of things
bakugou and midoriya being more familiar with each other in their middle school days compared to canon and bakugou gifting midoriya with personalized all might lighter god that’s adorable
ok but they’re talking about their favourite heroes and bakugou goes, “shocking that you don’t like endeavour.”
and midoriya just shrugs, twisting his hand and fingers to orchestrate the fire’s dance from his lighter, his viridian eyes brighter and says, “his fire feels wrong.” and they leave it at that
midoriya being inspired by bakugou’s explosions and attempting to copy those so bad that bakugou thought midoriya’s trying out for support classes
OK BUT FIGHT WITH SLUDGE VILLAIN?
he yanks out makeshift molotov cocktails from his bag, lights them up and throws them at the bastard. the sludge villain screams and retreats slightly because not only was he facing the fires but also the exploded glass shards. it gave enough time for bakugou to explode the villain and escape enough to allow him to breathe. in the end, all might still defeats the sludge but he misses bakugou and midoriya who escaped. no ofa for firey green bean.
bakugou helping midoriya create more explosions.
“but kacchba i want fire, not explosions!”
“same difference you pyro asshole!”
midoriya learns them anyways and enjoys it.
THE EXAM!!
i have two ways:
one: midoriya appealed to the staff that he needed support items and they allowed him and they watched in shock as this little boy explodes the arena worse than the explosion-quirked student. of course he passes and aizawa took him on as his student.
two: midoriya appealed to the staff that he needed his support items but the staff did NOT allow him because they’re considered weapons (as if quirks are not genetic weapons but i DIGRESS) and so when the exam starts, he stays at the very back of the other examinees. this was so that when he arrives at the scene, there are already spare parts for him to scavenge so that he can build makeshift explosions (foregoing whatever shit he learned from katsuki because all that’s on his mind right now are molotov cocktails)
so that’s what happens. he scavenges parts and hides inside one of the buildings so that he can focus more on making explosions and be less worried about being attacked. when he was fully geared, he steps out and begins to retaliate.
he works fast as to not waste his time and the makeshift explosions. because of this, others (ahem-aoyama-ahem) had no opportunity to steal his score.
same thing happens: uraraka gets caught and midoriya explodes the zero pointer. this time, however, the robot is utterly destroyed.
aizawa and majima saw midoriya’s performance, adored it, and began fighting for midoriya.
“majima, he’s here for the hero classes.”
“great. now give him to me.”
nezu pretends that he’s not planning on splitting midoriya’s schedule anyways.
BATTLE TRIAL OH MY GOD rip all might i bet you keeled over so bad, you were one second from turning to small might there and then.
all might: ok so one explodey kid to look out for. that’s not bad.
all might, one minute later: this green kid looks familiar…
all might, ten minutes later: what the fuck.
NO BECAUSE bakugou and midoriya being excited to explode things (well, more like midoriya’s excited and bakugou just wants to fight midoriya) and having a blast when fighting each other.
1a’s probably thinking “oh no” followed by “they’re hot” (literally too because yk the building’s on fire.)
MIDORIYA EXPLODING THE NOUMU??? king shit
midoriya saw this monster running to aizawa and he just points a more eloquent looking flame thrower (thank u mei for working with midoriya with that) at this beast and sets it on fire.
it effectively slowed the noumu and gave the others an opportunity to pull aizawa from the hit zone. it also granted all might more freedom when fighting the noumu because it was slowed enough that all might didn’t have to worry about exceeding his time limit.
the fire damaged some of its nerve processes that the scientist and afo had not accounted for. of course this review is returned to them and many of the noumus become fireproof because of this incident.
OK BUT DURING THE SPORTS FEST
midoriya crushing on todoroki because fire.
he was actually very interested in todoroki prior to sports fest but something about todoroki’s fight against sero sparked something more in midoriya. midoriya saw the anger from his ice, now he wants to see the same intensity from his fire.
his spiel of “that’s your power, todoroki” goes differently. todoroki still pulls him aside and trauma dumps on him but this time he goes, without missing a beat, “that fire is a waste on you.”
todoroki full body pauses because that’s not something he’s ever, well, considered to hear after trauma dumping.
“what?” he croaks, confused at the bubbling feeling. it’s a miasma of anger and hurt, but to a scale so unfamiliar.
midoriya shrugs. “fire is unique, more so as an elemental quirk. you think it doesn’t make half of you—well, i mean you’re right. it doesn’t. you make it. you control it. fire is often uncontrollable and yet here you are, having it as your power. it’s yours to control, so control it. use it.”
todoroki’s ears are ringing.
“you have it as your power.”
“so control it.”
and so he did.
midoriya watched todoki’s fire; watched the way the flames lick up up up and leaves no air bathed in heat. midoriya sees the rawness of anger and determination and thinks, “this is how fire should always look like.”
unconsciously he also thinks how todoroki’s fire is far more beautiful than endeavour’s.
midoriya loses and he’s not as sad about it. losing to something sentient (fire, not todoroki), for him, is a blessing.
todoroki advances along with bakugou.
bakugou who is jealous of todoroki because he saw how midoriya eyed todoroki’s fire and knew todoroki’s a competition in other more ways.
bakugou wins again, this time less angry because todoroki used his fire against him.
STAIN THINKING MIDORIYA’S JUST THIS WEIRD HERO STUDENT WHO HAS NO SPECIFIC QUIRK UNTIL HE FEELS FLAME KISS HIS SKIN AND SCREAMS BECAUSE DAMN IT GREEN EYED KID JUST SET HIM ON FIRE
todoroki full on pausing because he thought he’s the one who set stain on fire unconsciously only to follow the fire’s trail and sees it’s from one of midoriya’s many support items.
“shoot i didn’t mean to burn him that fast!”
“that’s your issue!?”
midoriya gives them a “duh?” look and todoroki feels himself warming up (HAH another fire pun) at midoriya’s ease.
flying noumi still comes and picks him up but midoriya also sets this thing on fire. the difference between a winged noumu and a normal noumu is that the wings are far more flammable and midoriya had quite a bit of fun at setting it on fire and hearing the crackling of flames on rubbery wings.
endeavour casts him a glance that speaks of approval and midoriya doesn’t know if he hates it or not.
tsukauchi arrives and sees not only stain, but the noumu and heaves up a very big sigh. “midoriya, really?”
GOBLIN! PYROMANIAC QUIRKLESS MIDORIYA IZUKU IS A FAVE IM SCREAMING
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1990jeevas · 3 years
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I love it when people talk about things they're passionate about, tell me something cool!! Anything you want, just something you find interesting or want to talk about :D
hello anon my beloved, I am in a bad mood so you will be receiving a passionate, yet lowkey of pissy rant about why villainizing bakugou makes me wanna vomit and its NOT just because I'm a dumbass kinnie :)
tws: child abuse (emotional and physical), near death expierences, bullying, kidnapping, suffocation, lots of trauma in general tbh. if you've seen bnha then basically just keep all the general triggering plot stuff in mind incase i missed any warnings
also, note: I havent caught up on bnha in a minute, I'm at like the start of the war arc but I barely remember shit there tbh so like. probs missing new stuff. also bnha spoiler warnings lol
so, for starters, the homie bakugou has like,, a good handful of issues that come from his childhood that explain why he's an ass. he was always praised and never actually reprimanded for being a twat which led to him having a huge ego that ended up fucking him over majorly. this ego was something that his mother acknowledged him having, but literally didnt try to fix it with anything other than violence. see here:
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like, instead of trying to help him, she hits and insults him, which is probably what led to his weird inferiority/superiority complex. being constantly told by others that you're outstanding and one day you'll be a top hero because you're rude and aggressive and then going home and being hit by your mother for those exact same behaviors is bound to fucking confuse a child.
so like, now that we've established that its definetly canon that his mother (parents? I think he said parents at some point but masaru doesn't seem like the type so 🤷) hits him though we don't know how much or how often (though if bakugou was as much of a little shit back then ((which as far as we've seen- he was)) then it was probably often), lets talk about how regardless of all that 1) hitting your kids as "discipline" not only doesn't work but is abusive lol like idc if it's spanking/popping them on the mouth for talking shit, slapping them across the face "on occasion", etc. shits not okay 2) hitting your kids!!!! does not work!!!!!!!! it is literally PROVEN not to work!!!!!!!! hitting a child who has done something wrong doesnt teach them to stop doing something it teaches them to be scared of you, which will cause the child to withdraw, removing part of their support system (assuming said abusive parents would even offer that up) and will most likely lead to them thinking they're a bad person, not that their actions were bad, which are two different things. so, ya know, that would clearly have an effect on a kid. like, as someone with a mother who reminds me all too much of mitsuki: I have acted like a complete shitbag and taken my anger out on people to feel better in the past because of the way my mother treated me. though it was nowhere near what bakugou did, I still know first fucking hand what a mother hitting and insulting her child will do, especially if they have no proper outlet for that (friends, a safe place to vent) which bakugou never fucking had.
theres also the fact that just talking to your kid the way mitsuki does (saying it's his fault he was kidnapped because he's weak, all while hitting him) is not??? okay?????? ive seen people arguing that this was just a joke in poor taste but like her son was KIDNAPPED and even if it was a "joke" there's literally NO WAY that would EVER?? BE FUNNY??????? she just sounds like the kind of parent who at the very least says shit without thinking that would traumatize bakugou (because being told right after being kidnapped it's your fucking fault by your mother is absolutely traumatizing) but it comes across as her being emotionally abusive.
mitsukis character as a whole comes across as a shitty mom who doesn't realize she's a shitty mom and thinks bakugou being an ass isn't at least partially her fault even though she's admitted to realizing he has always had an ego problem and doing nothing to fix it except for hitting and yelling which obviously did nothing but make him just as loud and violent as she is.
this is obviously not the entire reason why he's a dick but he was never properly taught that the shit he was doing wasn't okay and people not stopping it and/or praising him endlessly even tho he was a bully is basically the same as encouraging it, thank you very much.
moving on from that, let's talk about bakugous other traumas and how he naturally responds to them. hint: it's with either full blown panic or a fight response (verbal or physical, though usually physical. also sometimes it's the panic followed by the fight response.)
so far in bnha (keep in mind that I am not caught up, I've only read up to the beginning of the war arc and i barely remember those bits so) bakugou has...
nearly died via sludge villain (he was unable to move and was being suffocated to death- keep this in mind)
lost for the first time ever and against deku of all people (this nearly sent him into a full blown panic attack, likely because of that sexy little inferiority/superiority complex combo. think of this as like. gifted kid burnout lite. he has always been the best of the best and now suddenly he is being beaten by somebody who has always been weaker than him, which immediately makes him start thinking he was never actually that good, he's actually a fucking failure, a goddamn fraud)
won the sports festival by default (bakugou counts this as yet another failure because todoroki didnt try his best. had bakugou lost to todoroki full strength, he would've taken 2nd place with a bit of bitching, but he still wouldve taken it rather than refuse the medal as it would be a reminder that he failed. instead of accepting that like UA shouldve, the staff chained and muzzled him on live television and then had all might, his fucking idol, force the medal into his mouth. remember the sludge villain incident and how he couldnt move and was suffocating to death? yeah.)
been kidnapped because of the way he reacted to winning during the sports festival (he was aggressive and tried to refuse the medal because he felt he didnt deserve it and was then retraumatized by being chained up and muzzled. his "villainous attitude" was a fucking trauma response, do not tell me otherwise)
was then chained up once again by the LOV after being kidnapped,,, do we see the "retraumatize bkg" theme yet?
"ended all might" (he literally blames himself for all mights retirement because had he just not have been weak, all might wouldve had more time, right?)
my point with all of these is that bakugou has been severely traumatized and has then had his trauma responses (aggression, fight) used to further demonize him. not all people with trauma react the fucking same and the way the fandom just refuses to acknowledge anger as a valid form of trauma response is gross as hell.
moving away from that topic, bakugou has literally never had any actual friends, they all just used him and didn't care about him which absolutely will fuck up a kid, especially one who already has all that other shit going on. bakugou deadass never had a support system or people to help him grow as a person, let alone properly work through his fucking emotions so it's not surprising that he would take out his bullshit on the one person who tried to help him especially considering he saw dekus actions as him thinking he was weak. bakugou was raised to not seek help, he thought somebody strong shouldnt ever need it, so for somebody like deku (who bakugou percieved as weak and helpless already) to offer up help? deku must obviously think bakugou is even weaker than him, what other explanation could their possibly be!
speaking of which, there's his heaps of insecurities that he basically hid by being a twat and bullying others for most of his life. kid was so insecure he bullied deku for fucking years cause he thought deku looked down on him, thought he was better than him, etc. and that only got worse bc his idol then decided to take deku in, train him and even give him his quirk. there's probably some shit im missing but still he's got issues and always has had issues. that being said, he's actually improving and working them out now which is what makes him a really good, interesting character. it's also nice to see a character who is a dick without some tragic backstory (like his backstory is sad but its not the classic "my family was fucking slaughtered and i turned into a raging bitch who murders people" type shit) bc that rarely happens and it's like most assholes don't actually have a story like that they're just assholes lol
now lets talk improvement! lil bitch has been getting better since he got into UA and im so happy abt it!! he had a rough start what with deku suddenly having a quirk and all but like he is really improving now and it highkey shows that bakugou just mostly needed people who 1) didn't constantly praise him and actually criticized him instead 2) actually fucking punished him doing stupid shit and 3) some motherfucking friends
Since going to UA he's gotten actually feedback from teachers about his weaknesses and how to get stronger, he's lost against others, hes been told he has a shit attitude and is a dick, told he should be nicer and leave deku alone, etc etc. He hasn't gotten in trouble too much with teachers but others give him shit for what he does and aizawa has punished him too, while still acknowledging that bakugou is an amazing and dedicated student, something which no one else had done up til that point. and uh???? homie actually has friends who like,,, don't use him and also call him out when he's a dick. like specifically kirishima has done this shit and him and bakugous relationship is clearly very healthy and beneficial for the both of them. makes me feel all happy n shit, ya know
bottom line is: while it is absolutely valid to dislike or even hate bakugou because he is a massively flawed person who has been very cruel to others, villainizing him for the way he acts which in large part seems to be from a lack of guidance, a shitty mother and heavy amounts of trauma, is fucking awful. his actions cannot be fucking excused, he needs to apologize and continue to grow, but he is also a fucking teenager, who is just now being told that the way he acts is unacceptable by people who dont fucking abuse him (and I swear to god if any people who think mitsuki isnt abusive interact with this fucking post I will fullstop hardblock you, I do not fucking care) and actually treat him like a normal person instead of some prodigy child or someone who needs to be fixed.
people are free to debate my points or whatever bc I know some of this stuff is up to interpretation but like. dni if you're just here to say you hate bakugou for xyz reason or that he's irredeemable. also especially dni if you compare him to fucking endeavor yall bitches make me gag.
anyways thxs for the ask anon <33 sorry this is a kinda messy info dump lol
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umbillicalnoose · 5 years
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i think that you would think im pretty and would like my poetry and i want to share it with you. im shy.
to be honest, im very apathetic these days. im not the nice “cutesy baby flower petal boy” i used to be. a lot has happened & im bitter & sullen & all in all, a pretty shitty friend/person to know. i used to possess some redeeming qualities, believe it or not, even if they were construed by the subconscious in an attempt to be likeable - a facade, even tho its only a facade, is still tangible, still there, is still something, even if not authentic. is poorer character forgivable in the name of presenting more authentically? but nah. that makes it sound like im putting effort into being a better person, which im not. im just sort of fried & done. its been a very long time since i played the role i built for myself on here of the “small fawn boy who wants to help girls” lmaooo. how embarrassing. altho, i was just a kid, & i guess, if you had a tumblr as a teenager, you went thru some cringe (i know the use of that word has fallen in on itself & adopted its own definition but for lack of a better one) ass phases, whether it was kinning or malingering mental illness or oh fucking christ, all that gender bullshit, etc etc. from what ive observed, tho, loosely following kids im still casually friends with that i met on here, i think we’ve all managed to Grow The Fuck Up, at least a little. most of us have jobs or r in school or have partners - growing up & moving on is a very surreal experience to watch/go thru. im moving at my own pace & ive accepted that - im still currently using & starving myself & concocting a suicide plan every day but at least i use clean needles as much as possible, i actively & honestly do strive for the bare minimum calorically, & um able to work with the mentality of “well ill have this when i need it but todays not that day” a lot more readily, in relation to suicide shit. ive finally found a therapist who Really Gets It, is a frontrunner internationally on ritual & extreme abuse & mind control. its pretty incredible what a few years with a good therapist can do. anyways. im sorry, i know you didnt ask for all this & im not even sure why i divulged. i guess, what tipped me off, was your attempt at sounsing “cute” - dude, cut that shit out, i promise youll be a lot better off. & i know everyone interchanges aspects of their personality based on who theyre talking to/who they percieve themselves to be talking to, but i feel like not a lot of people give enough credence to the internet & its hand in shaping/molding young people, kids, vulnerable dumbasses, especially tumblr (tho, i get that its a relatively new phenomenon) - u get a bunch of the “weird”, “alternative”, ““ostracized” kids together on a website, of course its gonna nurture a culture of hypervalidatoon & pretending to be sick in order to fit in to the point that its not an act anymore & exacerbation of symptoms & basically, just sucking each others dicks, sitting in ur own shit, & never ending coddling. & then, you have the older group of kids, who have played this game before but instead of helping or ignoring the Dumbshit kids, they indulge their own normally-buried-but-unleashed-by-internet-anonymity sadism/human instinct to just be fucking dicks & so now you have this vicious cycle of anger & hatred & fucking melodrama up the urethra. im sorry, i know im comig off as/am being harsh but god fuckin dammit yknow? also, this isnt directed at you, specifically, more of a generalized thing, @ myself included. so uh. i mean, if u still wanna share it with me after reading all this, id be happy to read ur poetry. i used to be over the top nice & then reverted to Major Asshole & am now trying to find that sweet middle spot - honoring & allowing myself to share my pain without putting it on others. which is really hard!! cuz becoming a Dick was difficult in that it forced me to be more honest with my true self & as such, more vulnerable - now in trying to become Kinda Nice again because despite being a pulsating scrotom, ive had the intense desire for friendship & human interaction, while simultaneously doing things that i was consciously aware was pushing others away - but then, if i pretend to be nice, where does that authenticity i worked for & was so scared of go? & i dont mean telling someone their new haircut looks nice even when it doesnt - thats just not being a dick. but i guess, those r the normal trials & tribulations of any relationship & adolescent developing identity. which is weird too - dealing with “normal” issues, i mean. whats the point if your life/limbs/breaking point arent at risk? whats the point when your best friends already dead. im sick of people calling "survivors” (despise that word, so fucking female-originated & overdramatic) “brave” & “strong” - surviving is not brave or strong. its just survival. you wouldnt call an animal brave for running for its life from a predator but you would call a dog courageous for going into a burning building to save its owner. premeditated action on the notion that you are probably going to be hurt is brave. being subjected to pain with no choice is not. theres no “silver lining” or anything “good” to be drawn from it either - sure it may have made x a more compassionate person or made y more introspective & gentle but you know what would have been even fucking better??? if the shit hadnt happened in the first place! let x be an asshole & y be self absorbed - the “benefits”, so to speak, do not outweigh the cost, not by a long fucking shot. its not only patronizing to hear garbage like that, but a slap in the face to know that anyone could possibly see anything good coming from that nightmare & that the characteristics, good or bad, you developed either in response to or as a result of, are worth praise. dont tell me im strong for doing what i had to to escape a torture chamber - tell me im perseverant for studying my ass off & passing that test last week. in the words of one of my dearest & most fucking brilliant friends, “pain doesnt owe me/you purpose - the need to intellectualize & assign meaning to pain & death is not only futile, but harmful.” & honestly, i think that it stems from weakness (in most cases - i realize theres a plethora of other reasons such as those who r just desperate for something to hold on to or r hyperintellectual & analytical or who have been pressured by external “support” systems to find the “good” etc etc) - while the majority of people view the person who “can find the good in everything” (strictly speaking only in relation to trauma/tragedy here & more in denunciation of those that celebrate this trait as opposed to vilifying “survivors” who respond this way, though in my experience, its very very very rarely the “survivor” that perpetrates this ideology ) as strong, i sort of see it as a weakness - their inability to sit with & absorb their own pain or that of others is so strong that not only do they have to frantically pull rainbows out of the teeth of a meat cleaver, they also have to exist within this strange (tho, not malicious - more subconscious) superiority complex. like, nah, dude, some times shit is just awful. you cant tell me anything fucking good came out of a four year old girl being kidnapped, gangraped, & tortured for two years, before being impaled & left to die on a stake. her mom opened a non profit organization? oh well thank fucking god for that!!! those that believe the latter to be more “enlightened” or whatever the fuck r the same people who say shit like “dying is easy - living is harder” & i get that that its supposed to be interpreted metaphorically for the most part - giving up is easy, trying isnt (which also.....isnt true??? admitting defeat & fully accepting the fact that ur fucking helpless is beyond hard lmao???) - but pretend youre somewhere, anywhere outside ur sunny little fucking yoga studio full of white women whos biggest issues r the pta & johnny whos failing math, & lets say your life is in real, imminent danger, a gun is to your head & i want you to not scream or cry or beg for ur life since dying is “easier”. if dying is so easy, why do the majority of ppl cling to it with such desperation - why is suicide illegal? why do some ppl go thru 100s of chemo treatments even tho the doctors say theyre just prolonging the inevitable, ppl who cut off a diseased arm so it wont spread, those who walk dozens of miles every day for food & water, etc? & i know & understand the survival instinct better than anyone, even when i wanted to die more than anything, my natural instincts would kick in with no conscious neural input & id do what i had to do. im not condemning those who cling to life (ok - a little. ur wasting resources out of ur own fear. but i also realize thats just me being a Fucking Asshole As Always cuz technically, im doing the same thing tho its more due to lack of opportunity rather than fear. i just think, societally, death should be more normalized, discussed, & not made out to be so unknown & scary), instead just reprimanding those who say shit like that (inspirational facebook quotes). especially cuz most of the ppl who do spew that shit have never gone thru anything even remotely difficult - their worst nightmare is a Big Scary Black Man grabbing them on the street, mugging them, & touching their tits. & i also know that these stupid ass sayings are to be applied to bullshit like exercise & fitness (“no pain no gain” is another one of my Favorites) & not fucking torture or even just ur run of the mill rape, even that would probably smash the rose tinted banana republic shades off their beverly hills tanned faces. but ive heard the no pain no gain one a handful of times in the last few weeks, specifically from doctors performing procedures in preparation for my bottom surgery. & i know its supposed to be encouraging & they have no way of knowing, but its just like, buddy, u have no idea who youre fucking talking to. & im starting to understand what THEY mean when they say it - pain with a reward is infinitely more tolerable than pain just for the sake of pain; like, a tattoo, it hurts, but u know, when its done, its gonna be sick as fuck. when u r able to fall back on the idea that its for something u rlly want, its A Lot easier to handle as opposed to pain thats Just Pain - theres no reward for it except, i guess, that the more u experience it, the closer u r to the end of it lmao. i mean, i still hate when ppl say it cuz for most of my life, pain was just pain, & the “reward” was the opportunity to go home at the end & so whenever ppl say that, my mind just immediately resorts back to that & im just like haha fuck u. but im trying to remember my experiences r definitely not universal & im starting to sorta understand what they mean i think. but, flipping gears here, & going back to the sentiment of “everything happens for a reason”, the base philosophy of psuedo deep Fuckwads - a girls dad didnt fuck her “for a reason”, everything doesnt happen “for a reason”. like ok, hypothetically, the kid he impregnated her with & that she was forced to have at 12 may surpass all odds & not become a homeless junkie & instead become a world renowned doctor who finds the cure for cancer. but she wasnt raped repeatedly from the age of six for that “reason”, no matter what anyone says & honestly, the liberation of the masses does not justify the suffering of one, especially a child. in my eyes at least. but again, im a bitter asshole. sorry i just Went The Fuck Off here oh my god.....if u read all this, thanks, pal. if not, thats cool too. but yea, send me ur stuff, id totally be down to read it. as for me potentially thinking ur cute, i have to look at my disgusting shitstain of a “face” every goddamn day so everyone else to me is fuckin aphrodite. but im also tryin to not put so much worth into physical appearance- its not something that should be complimented cuz its just smth a person was born with which is the same reason it shouldnt be insulted. this is gonna sound gay & stupid but i personally find that a persons essence & personality really permeates. you can meet someone who, objectively, isnt all that great looking, but once u get to know them, u really see their beauty - how the sun catches in their hair, their dilated pupils looking up at u from under long eyelashes in the dark, the birthmark on their right shoulder that they despise but that is so Them, the gap in their teeth, etc. & idk how to phrase this without it sounding like “well ur ugly but at least ur a good person”, cuz that only reiterates the societally indoctrinated emphasis on appearance & my kneejerk reaction to assure the person in question that thats not what im saying is only another result of that!!! its inescapable!!! but no, really, its not just a matter of “its on the inside that counts” - physically, they change or maybe, actually this is more likely, when i first meet them, my “default” eyes r just looking for features that i know im immediately attracted to (tall, blonde, sickly as in sunken eyes sticklike pale but still looks like she could & will beat the shit out of me) but as i fall in love or get to know them better, my eyes adjust & i notice & adore the beauty that was there all along. so uh. idk if ill think ur “cute”. but probably, yes, ill think ur an angel.
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im gonna go full english lit under the cut
I saw measure for measure??? with my local Shakespeare in the Park about  month and a half ago and im mcfucking obsessed with it. So much so that ive tried to find every clip of every film, every show, rehearsal, production, that i can to compare how scenes played out. I even listened to a harvard lecture about it, i’m that far gone. I BOUGHT. A SHIRT. I bought the book with additional notes and discussions because this play is fascinating.
WHY AM I OBSESSED?!
All readings through different lenses are there in full force, fully supported, living side beside with one another. And professors, actors, directors, scholars etc, all seem to congregate on the fact that not one reading is more valid than the other. Theyre so well balanced without ever really given moral answers but merely presented, almost like the Jacobean meaning of the “glass” both a mirror to predict the future and reflect on oneself. And in a post elizabethan age where puritans were outlawing plays and putting stricter holds on licentiousess this play is so close to upsetting the dominant religious force.
And the READINGS! ARE ALL! SO GOOD! There is historicist reading (king James I), Folkloric, Religious, SadoMasochist, Psychosexual, Moral, Feminist, and Capitalistic readings. THEY ALL EXIST SIDE BY SIDE.
And the staging of the play determines how many of these a production can pull together. I think that is why I wanted to see as many scenes are possible. 
I think just the way Angelo and Isabella are played will determine which main reading the play tackles. 
I’ve seen some versions of the interview scenes that are truly horrific acts of sexual violence that made me watch between my fingers. In this the feminist reading can come into full force, the full underline of Angelo as a sexual predator is made prevalent. And the line “and with an outstretched throat i will tell the world what man thou art, Angelo” being present that strong feminist reading IS ALWAYS THERE. (DID I MENTION I LOVE ISABELLA FLAWS AND ALL). The idea that Isabellas voice is the most crucial device in the play is FLOORING.  
The Duke being a nearly godly figure who knows all and manipulates all, Angelo as his emissary becomes like an angel in the process of self corruption, from the inhumane ice he is so dubbed to warmed by the sins he so condemns. And Isabella defending the thing she so hates because it is her brother who commits the sin is the defense of someone who does not truly believe her brother is just. Mercy as justice. To wield power and to use it for mercy is so profound, and she is the only one who carries her ethos through like this to the end ofthe play. I’m not a theologist but so far this is the reading of theologists into the matter.
The version I saw in person he practically throws himself at her feet and it becomes an interplay of the psychosexual and moral. His knees buckle under her touch, it becomes the interaction of repressed sexuality channeled into both law and religion. In the Stratford production Isabella wipes her brow with water out of disgust or heat, no one is sure. it’s left ambivalent. In the one I saw Angelo was made almost comedic and sympathetic, which made ISabellas mercy still feel like an axe coming down upon his head. 
And then characters like Barnadine just using comedy, the genre of the gods as the greeks called it, to dimish law, to put it to shame. To put the godly/playwright Duke in his place.
The folkloric bed switch (which is folklore yes but Im not totally comfortable calling it consensual even tho Angelo is a sexual predator you can bring modern sensibilities to the reading), is indicative of oral traditions that predate shakespeare. The idea that every character must do in this play the thing they most loathe to do.
Claudio fears death so he must die, Isabella must have sex to save a life when she has sworn herself to chastity. Then they both sort of hurt each other, Claudio by asking her to yield herself up to this non consensual sexual coercion of upmost grossness, and isabella by telling him to be happy he will die because there is nothing so painful as being alive (ISABELLA HES AN EXPECTING FATHER). He asks her to do the thing she loathes most in a fit of desperation because the man who loves life must die. And Isabella the woman who “would wear these keen whips as rubies” would have have done anything but sex, tells her brother that living isnt worth it. ITS INTENSE. LIKE WOW.
It’s absolutely no surprise that Isabella and Angelo are my favourite characters in the play. This awful sexual coercion (the degree of violence is dependant on staging which is like holy shit WTF), lives side by side with the fact that they are the two only people whose language, diction, beats, and intelligence matches each other. They both have the same fervor for their moral divisions and hierarchies. The idea of strict testing of morals and faith is in the text. Isabella wishes for harsher, more challenging, and harrowing tests of faith. You can argue as to why, I personally think its for the strengthening of faith and connection to the divine. Meanwhile Angelo is the one setting restrictions for hundreds of thousands of vienna, setting those on other people to strengthen the connection to a higher moral fibre, and I think in some respects faith as well but thats my interpretation. 
Where others live their vices without restrictions, these two set limits for either themselves and/or others to be something more. They are in the way that motif of the “glass” The mirror. In that sense they reflect each other, but they also become each others foil. Which is why I do think a case can be made for the parallels with the psycho sexual and the SadoMasochist readings. Restraints for rewards, the repression on both their parts is there.
I’m not saying that negates the strong feminist reading or in anyway shape or form validates the absolute horror of the coerced sex/rape. I just say that they exist side by side with each other. They are equals in text/language/fervour AND YET they are not because he holds every power over her and her brother. He wants to restrict others where he cannot restrict himself, and Isabella restricts herself in part because she lives in a Vienna full of vice. She has a control over her own self that he proves not to have. And HE has a control over the world of the play that she cant. 
AND YET. SHE IS MARRIED TO THE DUKE. SHE MARRIES INTO PROMINENCE. I don’t love the idea that she does not become a nun, her original want, and is instead coopted by the shitty duke (i am not pro duke sorry). The only upside at the end of the play is that Isabella can, in some measure, have political sway over the masses. Meanwhile Angelos fall and forgiveness put him into a marriage where his vice of coercive sex becomes consummation of a sleeping marriage. IT FEELS LIKE they sort of mirror each other the whole way through the play. ITS WEIRD BECAUSE THERE IS SO MUCH SEXUAL AND POLITICAL INEQUALITY TO THEM. ITs a play full of contradictions which I LOVE BECAUSE IT IS NOT SIMPLE NOT BECAUSE IT IS RIGHT. I do think there is a case to be made that Isabella unwillingly comes face to face with sexuality, his and hers, and its not on terms she wants, but it happens. And you see her struggling to maintain the authority over her own autonomy. But then she has to contemplate sex for herself, “to give up her boy into saucy sweetness, licentiousness, the filthy vices”. What does ISabella do when she comes face to face with her own sexual needs, whatever she may be? We have productions in the Stratford archives from 50 years ago that make an ambiguous case that the meeting of morality and sex might actually do something for her? I DON’T KNOW. The readings keep coming. There is a possiblity for a strong Ace reading for her which no one really touches on. 
ON A LIGHTER NOTE
This play has my favourite sexual innuendo. When theyre like “WHAT DID CLAUDIO DO?”
“Her?”
“no! What did he do to get taken away by the provost”
“HIS GIRLFRIEND.” 
(god and isnt it nuts that the first man on the scaffold for unlawful fornication IS IN A CONSENSUAL LOVING RELATIONSHIP WITH HIS GIRLFRIEND, A BOND AND CRIME THAT THE LAW (ANGELO) HAVE DEEMED IMMORAL. YET THE LAW (ANGELO) WOULD HAVE IT PARDONNED BY A NON CONSENSUAL SEX FOR EXECUTION PARDON. THE MASK OF MORALITY OF ANGELO. JFC HES SO FUCKED, like hes AWFUL, because he ends up sending claudio to death after he thinks hes had sex with isabella. LIKE WHAT A PIECE OF SHIT ND YET STILL WEARS THE LAW AS HIS MASK AFTER THE ANGEL HAS FALLEN. ITS COMPLEX AND I LOVE IT)
God and just…the sex jokes, the black comedy of barnadine right next to the high shooting morals of angelo, isabella, and mariana (another complex af character. The 1976 version certainly makes a psychosexual explanation out of that, which im not sure i enjoy. Again the psychosexual has its limits in a play about sexual coercion and rape)
AND THE FACT THAT MERCY IS WHAT SETS YOU FREE, LIKE PROSPERO FORGIVING HIS ENEMIES, ISABELLA FORGIVING ANGELO IS A HERCULEAN FEAT, IT FEELS CLOSE TO GODLINESS IDK MAN. AND I UNDERSTAND WHY SHE TELLS HER BROTHER NO I WONT SLEEP WITH HIM FOR YOUR LIFE BECAUSE ITS RAPE, BUT THEN IS LIKE BE GLAD BEING ALIVE IS SHITTY ANYWAYS. Im like? ISABELLA? WHAT?! ISabella does not know about herself that she can be desired because GOD DOES IT TAKE HER A WHILE TO UNDERSTAND ANGELOS MEANING, and yet shes got such a force for words. I find it hard to think being married to the duke that she wont have some power. 
And the exchange of Angelo and Isabella in the second interview.
-His moral stance on unlawful fornication starts with abortive language, the harsh restrictions but DEVOLVES INTO THE SEXUAL WITH THE INTELLECTUAL DICTION, It becomes a mirror of himself until he is explicit of what he wants from her. (OH GOD TRULY HE GIVES ME NAUSEOUS AND YET THE ONE IN THE PLAY I SAW HE WAS ENTHRALLING I HATE THE RANGE OF THINGS ANGELO CAN MAKE ME FEEL). His mask of morality is slowly removed
-ISABELLA must argue on behalf of her brother, believing in restrictions of the kid angelo speaks of, they believe in restraining oneself to achieve a higher form of being, and yet has to straight up defend something she hates because she loves her brother. And ANGELO CAN SEE IT. I WISH THERE WAS AN AFTERMATH WHERE WE SEE HER USING HER INTELLECT AND WORDS FOR HER ENDS. 
I truly think the second interview scene is one of the best exchanges Billy Shakes wrote. Because it ENDS LIKE THAT. GOD the david tennant one is chilling, the oregon shakespeare festival one is fucked. The 1976 which is the most psychosexual was so intensely disturbing that the Angelo got applause for it. IDK What that means and im too scared to ask. Idk how the RSC managed because youtbe doesnt show me that. The Repurcussion theatre was the most varied array of contradictions for angelo instead of just corrupt judge. It literally is all the shakespeare villains that do the most heinous things that Im like THATS MY FAVE. Iago was just RACISM/Sociopath and fifteen year old me was like YES HIM. I mean Richard III is bad but hes fun. ANGELO AT THE BEST IS A SEXUAL PREDATOR AND YET IM STILL LIKE WOW HOW COMPLEX ALSO THE ACTOR WAS SO GOOD LOOKING AND PLAYING UP THE BDSM BOTTOM ANGLE I WAS GONE. 
And the Isabellas go from wilting lily, to some sort of quiet and reserved girl, and the one i saw was literally “she is tiny but fierce” like her voice was really forceful and i thought it was amazing. 
THIS PLAY IS FUCKED WHEN IT COMES TO THESE READINGS LIVING SIDE BY SIDE BUT BOY IS THIS INTERESTING. 
if you made it this far wow holy shit. thanks for coming to my ted talk.
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Text
Truth be told
Life is a funny thing full of shitty things and happy things.
i think when im older ill look back on these and just dread it all. it curls my stomach to read my old journeys. not in a bad way really but not in a good way.
as my son is getting older and older i am faced daily with confronting myself with my own inner child.
well how was i raised? what did they do when i did this? well did i like what they did when i did that? was it necessary. this jumble of words cascades from my mind. all these questions i never had before ...thought about.
i never really thought about how or why i did something. how i reacted. how i learned... its crazy how its shaped by those who raised us.
as i am now the one doing the raising you come to these moments every SECOND and think IF i do it this way i could change his whole world right now.
example: if i yell right now for him making this mess, i could destroy his ego or teach him a lesson. do i use force . do i yell.
in that moment every mistake uve made as a kid comes to mind. every parent who taught you that lesson comes forth and you think hmm i can approach things so many different ways.
you decide whatever you decide.
as a mom i see it this way now.
im going to mess up i mean its a give in
and mess up is a silly word because its all a learning process LIFE
so assuming just by living it that you'd mess up well thats instantly pessimistic. BUT anyway
im going to keep trying till the outcome seems even, not so bad not so good . not hurtful but helpful
coming to these cross roads doesnt mean that the way i was raised was wrong. AGAIN i dont really see wrong or right. life is crazy and if we argue about mundane issues like....wrong....or right... we could be here for months.
morally correct- ok. wrong in the sense of 2+2=5 OKAY.
but i mean im always saying the apple is the apple. if we argue about the hues of green and the bitter and sweetness we both agree its an apple. maybe u like it maybe i dont. my opinion isnt helping the situation or growing it in a positive way- why bicker. its non sense and such a waste of energy
SO
yeah if i change the way i run my marriage and parenting its not about being some fuckin rebel. its just about me living my life.
my sons 3. he is brighter than any star ive ever been able to gaze upon. being in his light makes one feel special and free. you could only dream of being in his attention because it would be such radiation. i am his attention most moments. 23 hours out of the 24 hour day . and i try and glorify every minute.
as he grows i simply try and stay excited to meet the next version of himself. i just want to build a relationship with him where he feels safe.... safe to be himself. to speak his mind. to act freely and truly be himself in whatever fashion. i want him to feel confident in himself and in me to be able to ask all types of questions and figure out all types of answers together, because maybe one answer isnt necessarily the only answer.
i want him to learn all about life and love and be excited to learn more and more about it. maybe to the point where his lust will never get full- that as his cup over flows he only continues to give to others. and the more and more he gets the more and more he can give.
that that fire in him never fades.
that doubt never over clouds his judgement
and that if only- like today and yesterday and from every moment since i was able to hold him for the first time- that he forever finds comfort in my holding. and shelter in my arms from whatever maybe hard on him for the moment.
i cant expect more than that. i truly cant. life has to happen and learning has to happen, and with life and learning come mistakes and opportunities and saddness and greatness and that is LIFE as we know it. to expect more OF him i believe would take away from whats meant to just be. JUST be julian. just be you.
id like to the biggest guide and support i can. to honor to keep u safe and healthy. to talk it out. work it out. see all the sides so we can simply understand each other. i want to bask in ur light forever.
like most days these days arguing and yelling is so common. my mothers opinion is a constant reminder to do something or change something. instead of just being nothing. her mind is constantly flooded with worry and love and its all very confusing. i dont believe love is that hard. i do believe i was raised to believe it is among many other things but as ive learned..its not. worrying is not love. its a by product- a sub by product if that, love can be so many other greater postive things. worry should be the last. her expectations and how she has lived and thought control her actions. i feel she lets her expectaions could the reality. that reality IF it differs then her thoughts then it must be less. it must be incorect. it must be fixed.
i dont feel thats the case. im not aruing her way is wrong in any sense but i think our ways are deff different. and thats okay as i grow "my way " changs every second - logic would tell me that as i approch my 70th year of life i would have changed so much so that im sure my way would infact be similiar to yours. but that moment..is not now.
now is when i am able to make my own decsions. and those decisons need to be made and tended to be me.
i think its fair to say that with the 44 yr differnce between us we are entitled to have different opinions on most topics. the age the era. its a give in. so why argue about those things.. the things we cant really chnage or predict but have shaped us from within. old trauma's - life events.. these things have happened but they dont need to necessarily impact us in a negative way. i dont think any experience is meant to impact us in a negative way. i think it would best or better to learn and adapt and create the most postive "ness" we can cuz one can only grow in healthy soil.
her opinion and her thoughts no longer feed my soul. my self. they no longer impact me greatly. with postive impact but only bring negative thoughts and feelings. you are entitled to feel what u feel and how u feel it but i dont believe youre entitled to make meeee have to feel those feelings. i can understand u simply by u having raised me. by us having had a discussion. i know the feeling of making new steps in the sand. i just dont feel its fair to make me feel shitty for walking my own path.
just because its different doesnt mean its wrong
just because were learning and growing daily doesnt make us naive fools.
jp there is and never will be a right and wrong with u and me okay. prismic infinity honor and see all sides. lets argue less. listen always. i want to be someone u simply want to be around.
im done arguing about this apple
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mattyslittleworld · 3 years
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dead mans coffee
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July / 2020
Just woke up in my front seat, at a rest stop in Tennessee. First thing I saw was my ALL WILL SUFFER tattoo on my leg. A constant reminder of a different person. Tomorrow I’m getting coffee with Skrillex’s right hand man in Nashville, and I’m nursing a cold coffee in the heat watching this crazy lightning shoot across the skyline. It looks like the end of the world. Or some fucked up Lucero song. I must’ve pulled over for a second and closed my eyes and just dropped dead for hours while parked, I’m on the way to my hotel. 
I am sitting in a diner on broadway in Nashville, TN. Nursing another shitty coffee booking meetings. As the texts come in I ignore them because they are covering the screen and distracting me from reading and studying how to properly sell my soul to the devil at the crossroads In Mississippi. 
Clarksdale, Mississippi
12:30 am
Where Robert Johnson, Bob Dylan, and now, Matty Carlock, sold their souls to the devil. 
December / 2020
Sitting in my home, in Hollywood, CA. I have the window open, and I hear the subtle sound of LA breathing, cars passing on the boulevard, sirens off in the distance, and a vinyl record of mine spinning at the lowest volume possible for me to still hear yet ignore it. I feel calm and at peace, although, it seems like a parallel feeling is war, confusion, imposter syndrome, abandonment, and skeptical. How could these two umbrellas of emotion coexist? Its very interesting. Ive been recording so much music that has nothing to do with my artist project. Its been liberating to put that aside for something greater. A new focus. Leaving artistry a vessel solely for extreme self expression and cathartic release. 
July / 2020
Winding the day down, 10:30pm. With an open tab that reads “Tigers Jaw holiday show” - on pause. I open my Mac book on my couch, ready to go through stems and ratchet strip club beats, and it catches my eye. I press play and it leads me down a rabbit hole. I find myself watching “Never Saw It Coming” right into “Chemicals” / live in Boston. Like lightning it struck through my entire body. Maybe it was the 2 hour long conversation with Andy? And the memories we were trading. The bond we have over hard times, innocence, violence, literal blood on the pavement, years of freezing in the winter....nowhere to go. The people that were around - we made forever memories to these two songs. I right away, made a playlist that consists of “The Sun, I Saw Water, Chemicals, Never Saw It Coming, and Planes”. On top of that I found the live acoustic set they recorded and put out. When I was young on DIY tours, sleeping on floors, dirty as shit, poor as shit, a human being at the very best.....the uncertainty of my near future was so bleak. I remember Title Fight came out with their record “Shed” - and the song “where am I?” would lay me down on long drives, or on the floor. I’d watch white lines pass one by one by one into the abyss of nothing. 
The line 
“Another floor
A different ceiling than the night before
Where am I?
While you’re back home”
Missing my girlfriend at that current time, leaving, and just laying on a strangers floor thinking where am I while you’re back home? What am I doing? Maybe there’s nothing only this moment?
On the tigers jaw live EP they covered this acoustic and it’s everything right now. I am fortunate to live a block away from the sunset strip - and I grabbed my skateboard and just bolted into the night. 
This SO SPECIFIC FEELING of these songs. That nobody in this environment will ever understand. It’s so beautiful. It’s so real. It’s so raw. It’s exactly what I need right now - as the past 3 weeks I’ve been living here have moved faster than the past 4 years. A loss of identity easily awaits you. It’s like you fight your whole life for that moment, to get to where you dream of, to get a shot. Scrape and crawl. And then reset. Since I’ve been living in Hollywood my day to day has been a huge mirror for me. The parts of myself I’ve been trying out run have caught me. Maybe all of this could coexist? 
March 2nd / 2021
Spring is here. Its 75 degrees in LA and theres this new thing I noticed while driving around…..the overbearing smell of flowers in the air. It sounds like a movie. Its fucked up cause It felt like a funeral in my car. I was like what the fuck is happening? It smells like a small funeral in here….are my dreams dying? Am I dying? Is punk dead? Okay its just a Ryan gosling movie out here I guess. Whatever lets go. Here’s some hatrebreed. But the windows are down. My mood is different. My spirit is lifted, which ive been desperate to say. I automatically get punched in the guts with the feeling of driving so fucking fast, and blasting title fight. Skateboarding. Looooooooooong drives with fucked up friends to out of state shows no one will be at. Im listening to Stab by Title Fight - off the Shed LP. What a specific time in my life this brings back. That I usually talk about on this little throw up blog often. Spring is such a pivotal time in my life every year. Since covid shows stopped - human decency stopped - community stopped - my natural habitat was taken from me, and all of my friends and family. I remember living in New York in 2011. At the New Yorker. I was studying at the Institute Of Audio Research to be a janitor in my home town. Because that’s what they teach you. Instead of studying compression, and listening to washed up hacks talk to me about music, I would walk out my building onto 8th ave. B Line it Penn Station. Get on the LIRR and ride that shit right into the best LI shows every night I could. Id meet all my friends from Jersey / NYC / Philly and even Baltimore because it was so common to make it a priority to no matter what, drive hours on end to support a hardcore shows and to not lose touch with the hundreds around the country that you call family. Drive to Richmond for a shows on a Monday night, go off, hit a diner after with your new found tribe, then drive home, be back at 6 am, and just stumble into your bullshit job with a black eye or scratches all over you. It was all worth it. Probably quit that job anyway to go on tour with your friends band and live as gypsies for the entire summer too. Spring embodies this spirit for me. Church parking lots in Doylestown, PA - full of kids from all over the country, who left their problems in their hometown, to just get on the road with their best friends and basically start a new life. It is just amazing how formative those years were for a lot of my friends. I have people I met at shows from all over the country messaging me always checking in, and supporting, and sometimes it feels like I know them better than my first cousins, aunts and uncles. We were at war together. We fought against the world together. We found ourselves together. We created shit from nothing. Determination and passion. Oh no….Planes by Tigers Jaw just came on. You know the vibe. This shit just hits so different now as a pop / hip hop producer. This PA scene, mixed with NJHC, just stood me up and gave me confidence to have my own voice, my own thoughts, and to fight back. Something about being in a shitty car and it smells like dirty vans and like…..axe to cover up the smell. BELTING Basement and car moshing and almost driving off a bridge. Listen. I know every single blog is about this. But fuck you fight me. ITS CALLED SELF EXPRESSION GRANDMA. SO STRAP INTO YOUR BOOT THINGS AND ENJOY THE RIDE TO NOWHERE. Its been crazy living in LA. I live directly on Hollywood BLVD, on the Walk Of Fame. Where I was almost killed two weeks ago over someones gang that my ass is not in. My guy looked at me and said YO YOU MATTY? And I was listening to Taylor swift in my headphones walking back from Starbucks and it was so funny how different my energy was. I was like bro can you kill me already dude because these Taylor tones are so good that they gunna just end up killing me anyway. So perfect timing. I think the guy was mad at my friend to say the least lol. But every night its loud 808’s, the sounds of the city, amazing energy, and neon lights shining in from lit up billboards off the BLVD. Its such a culture shock for me. I feel like im too aggressive just from being east coast. But its just what it is. It took me a little to adapt to being in sessions and meetings with seasoned people in this industry who have major cuts and recognition. But I just learned to double down on myself, and be as authentic as I possibly can be. Theres nothing like crushing writing sessions in the pop realm, then turning off my shit, unplugging, and run into the night with my skateboard and old punk records. It’s almost like my own secret that is becoming my blood. I haven’t been communicating with the ones who like my music, have interest in what im doing, come to my shows etc - since I touched down here….I just unplugged….started writing HEAVY and decided to dedicate months to getting better, learning, becoming smarter, discovering a vision that’s much broader than what were sold, finding myself, making sure my wisdom is parallel to my age - if not wise beyond my years. A lot of artists and bands SING, PLAY, PERFORM, PROMOTE. But I have decided to WATCH, ATTEND, and LISTEN. Everynight I sit down with tea, unplug, and spin records on my turntable…in the dark, in my living room, alone….all kinds of records. From The National, to Springsteen, to Title Fight, to Hendrix, to the rare Troublemaker LP and 7” I have…..Sharon Van Etten, Jesse Malin…..ugh. Its just bliss. Pure bliss. Right now im drinking coffee and bouncing from listening to Into It Over It and American Football. I spent all last night rapping my ass off, mixing, and singing ref vocals for other people. It was so fun. Im finding a lot of my new material is this spirit im talking about - but over hip hop production. I want to tell my life story and combat the stereotypes of modern rap and pop music with true intentions and unique tones of untold stories that press, radio, and this market usually doesn’t get fed. Ive also realized a lot of music I was promoting over the past year to come out (prior to the pandemic) hasn’t come out….and I know people are questioning that….what is happening? So before covid I had German solo dates booked - and then I was going to the UK right after. I have a bunch of single drops lined up with music videos. Some you can guess with who. And then the pandemic hit and I canceled everything and decided to pivot my focus into my passion for songwriting and production, instead of sitting around “waiting for shows to come back.” I pretended that shows were never going to come back and doubled down on my career as a producer, that at the time, still is, moving forward at a faster rate than my artist shit. So I packed my shit after offers, and opportunity presented themselves. Touched down on a Tuesday, with meetings that Friday. Off to the races. In sessions that following Monday. Fast forward here we are. Hungry, learning, learnt, turned 30. Looking at the next decade like Mcgregor at the weigh in. Fight ready. Ive learned so much since the fall that all of the music I had planned on releasing, I loaded it back up, tore it apart, and re built it. So its not stale, so its not expired, so its not “then”….so its NOW. Which im so glad I did, and im doing. I don’t think ive been in the booth more. My mind is so stimulated by this wave im on. And its got me in a good place. Now that the spirit of spring is here, my mental health is going to be taking a big leap as well and im going to do everything I can to just flood all of this content. I think Never Meant by American Football is the best song ever made. Me and Mike were talking about doing a song together a few months ago and that would be such a trip for me. 
I wanted to talk about my recent trip to Joshua Tree. I was invited by Christopher Thorn from Blind Melon to live at his studio for a few days to write together. I didn’t really know what to expect. I met him once or twice thru Clinch, and just around the Sea Hear Now circle back east, and I was familiar with No Rain (his hit). We got on the phone, picked a weekend where it’d work for both of us, got some covid tests, and boom. Packed my shit again (right off a flight back from New York, where I shot 3 music videos, and did 1 remote session in 2 fucking days), and drove out to the desert. There is no address so I had a map. It was epic. It was in the desert desert. Like THE DESERT FAM. Coyotes at night, snakes and shit. The air was so dry, your lips would get chapped to let you know death was right around the corner so you better man up baby boy. Beforehand - from all the traveling and flights, and burning myself out on videos and sessions, I found myself listening to a lot of acoustic Nebraska Springsteen type shit. John Moreland, or even like acoustic bayside, Lucero, Leonard Cohen, Tom Waits…..just pure music with no samples, not gridded, not sold, no machine, no click, just real live country music inspired by the human condition….of the earth. It was just speaking to my soul…..so when we booked this to get in the room together….man was I ready. I don’t think ive had an experience so fruitful to the soul. And ive played shows in Slovenia, and sipped espresso on a bridge that looked like a painting, staring at subtle mountain tops off in the distance like I was a character in some book. We started working at night and ran it up till like 3 am. As the sun came down the lights off in the distance miles and miles away were so clear because we were just the only life form around….and it would just shine into the studio windows and reflect on the perimeter making it seem like we were surrounded by New York City. It did a lot for my soul to play drums, acoustic, sing, play piano, shred electric, even mix a little. I felt like I made a very fast lifelong friend. Its been a minute since I got on with someone like that. We talked a lot about growing up touring. And wed finish each others sentences regarding topics that ONLY people like us would know. Like Subway being a life line for DIY touring, or the weird strange feelings of comfort from rest stops in the middle of nowhere at 4 am, the rest stop coffee that you get to just make the next 2 hours of the drive into town bearable. But then you see your boy from your band in the other aisle so you throw shit at him. Then you all stumble back into the van/bus and just disappear into the night. This shit was so needed for me. When Id wake up, id make espresso, and just sit out front and listen to Joe Rogan, at this random chair that was behind his studio, facing the mountains. Just endless property waiting to leave you 6 feet in the ground. I sat there and sipped my espresso, and just reflected on the long journey of my career. How many random moments like this ive found myself in since I was 15. In the middle of the desert where Springsteen hangs out with my heroes, off the strength of my songwriting. Or in Romania drinking coffee, fucked off, on a bench far from the venue, by random train lines in the pouring rain by myself. The farthest from humanity I can be. Or the random VFW hall in my head that I don’t even know where it is, with my little punk crew, who all smell like complete shit and cigarettes and soda, fucked off god knows where, just to finger point and sing along to this band we found on myspace that were in OUR hometown the weekend prior singing to our band. Theres just an endless string of memories that can go on forever, with stories that just fulfill a lifetime, of conversations that just make the white lines on I95 move faster. Or just everyone is quiet - reading a book - texting - exhausted from the night prior - and you just ABRUPTLY turn on teenage dream by Katy Perry SOOOO LOUD - take your shirt off and start dropping it like its hot from the passenger front seat, and catch a mid afternoon front flip stage dive into the backseat. From those youthful days of this underground spirit, to existing in a realm of pure monsters of my craft, I truly believe this next decade could co exist and be one for the books. Damn I feel good. Also me and Sasso started a book club called BSU and you can’t be in it because you probably read books and the only rule for our book club besides not speaking about book club is, you can’t read books. Okay im going to go buy a bike right now so I can ride It to Mexico and get abducted by the cartel and sold for bitcoin. FAREWELL EARTHLINGZ. 
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het-brunette · 4 years
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I was unhealthy attached to a narcissist when i was a teenager. I became so insecure, and reacted to him in ways that i’ll forever regret. Time has past, and im not longer that person and proud, but narcs will forever attach themselves to you. He told so many people things about me and b/c of the way i reacted they’ll believe him. This sounds so vain but im starting a business. I’ve hidden from marketing myself in any carear b/c im afraid he’ll try to smear my name if i get any attention 1/2
2/3 im not saying this as an assumption. He’s done it in the past and will again. Ppl downplay my experiences with him because the term narcissist is used so loosely, but its real. Its scary. Im still traumatized til this day. I hide myself and my accomplishments, and i dont want to live like that but im so ashamed of him being apart of my past. So ashamed that i has sex with him even though i was coerced until i gave in. I dont tell anyone about what i experienced anymore ive only ...
3/3 i’ve only told my family and my bestfriend. I now pretend not to know him, i pretend that i never met him, and we never happened. If he tries to bring up my past i cant think of any other way to diffuse his smear campaign by not responding. I responded in the past and it just gave him more fuel. I dont want to be seen as fake but any reaction i give to him.. gives him power. Is this a healthy way to respond or is there another perspective / option im just not seeing?
So first of all I’m going to say I’m really sorry that you’re going through this. He sounds really shitty and this situation sucks.
Secondly, I’ve gone through something similar. I’ve been terrified of someone spreading lies about me (and they did try) and debating what to do in that kind of situation. But my friends and family stood by me 110%, even despite the people in power calling me a liar and abusing me further.
You did the right thing in telling your family and best friend, and it sounds like you have support from them. That’s awesome. It means you know that people will back you up and stand by you if the shit hits the fan.
It seems like the thing that worries you the most is him trying to ruin your business, so I’ll address that the most.
Don’t hide your business or limit marketing yourself because of this one dude. He’s trash and everyone who hears or reads what he’s saying about you will know he’s trash. “Picking on someone who’s just starting up their own business? What an asshole!” is what they’ll say.
Shutting down false accusations is not giving power away, it’s SHOWING YOUR OWN POWER. It takes great strength to stand up for yourself and doing so calmly shows amazing self restraint. But it comes to a point where you’re sick of doing this, so just stop. Delete the comments, change the subject in a verbal conversation, straight up tell people that it’s in the past and you’ve moved on (even if you haven’t, you want to and that’s the first step).
It’s not fake to move on, it’s healthy. You’re fucking done with this dude.
Also I really suggest that you get yourself some professional help if you can. I recommend www.betterhelp.com. If money is a problem, this website has discounts you can apply for based on how much you earn. This guy did a number on you and it can help to have some professional guidance in moving forward.
Obviously I don’t know the full situation, so if you think I could clarify something, please let me know.
I wish you so much luck and peace moving forward! If you like, I can also boost your business by spreading the word about it here with my followers.
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theworthofhollin · 7 years
Text
SHITTY MOVIE REC OF THE WEEK: 
Nick Powell's OUTCAST (2014) starring Hayden Christensen, Yifei Liu, and Nicholas Cage. 
(i know. i know. bear with me here.)
Dudes. First things first: this is Hayden Christensen's perfect come-back film. like sure this is not a Great Film but I honestly forgot how good Christensen was as a physical actor??? and DAMN. with the physicality of this role...he is so good. (and what’s so great about this is watching it immediately following the clone wars tv show is PERFECT because its the same form of Anakin we see there: a killer, but war-torn, hungry, dynamic.) 
No, really. This is, I shit you not, the ultimate Anakin Skywalker AU Redemption Arc. But with more mohawks and stunning fight choreography and crazy good scenery and also did i mention mohawks. hayden christensen has a mohawk. anyways. if that alone doesnt make any sw fan want to watch this movie [on US Netflix too!!!] then 1. have fun living ur boring ass life??? 2. look at this photo, is that not rots skywalker to a t and 3. keep reading.
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SO. Set in what we can assume is the late 1200s, early 1300s?? Hayden Christensen plays a Jedi Knight, sorry, TEMPLAR KNIGHT, named Anakin-- I MEAN JAKOB, who is fighting alongside his Master, Obi Wan Kenobi-- no, sorry, his MENTOR, NIC CAGE, in the Clone Wars, sorry, i mean THE CRUSADES. classic mix up.
SIDENOTE: If the guy who wrote this movie doesnt also have a secret ao3 account dedicated to his star wars prequel au fanfic collection that he’s been cultivating since high school then ill eat my fucking shoe. 
(also idk what Cage’s character’s actual name is considering I, like everyone else in the world, can only refer to him as Nic Cage in any role ever. But back to the point.) 
[spoilers ahead]
Alright. so. 
Somewhere In The Middle East, Nic-Wan Kenobi witnesses his protégé's bloodlust in a battle that results in the deaths of a temple full of innocent women and children, (THE YOUNGLINGS... ANAKIN....) and naturally he goes awol, while Jakob/Anakin spirals down a guilt-driven descent into opium, believing himself to be Damned, Capital D, for his actions. 
SIDE NOTE: Hayden looks especially good in this movie, but particularly when he’s PISSED OFF and EXTRA SAD. i dont want to use to the term smad but damn. smad is...a good look here. 
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i digress. 
(serious spoilers below:)
Here's where we enter fix-it fic mode: 3 years after the Crusades have ended, (and in true Kenobi style, Nic Cage has disappeared into the vast eastern wilderness with only his patchy grief-beard and an extra robe he’ll probably lose) a Chinese King is dying, and wishes to make his heir his gentle-hearted 13-year-old son. His elder son, a brutal war-monger, says FUCK U DAD, kills him and takes the throne, but not before their sister LIAN, played by the lovely YIFEI LIU, escapes with both her younger brother and the seal to the kingdom under the cover of night.
(this is basically TPM with shittier gender roles, but otherwise a pretty obvious parallel to the sw Naboo Invasion) And its EXTRA interesting to me because in the sw universe, Naboo court regalia is canonically based off of ancient chinese imperial robes, with aspects of certain japanese and mongolian formalwear as well. AND most of the jedi philosophies are bastardized variations of asian iconography and medieval knights errant, so its fun to see that played out on screen and it lets me draw parallels wherever i want which is always a major plus.
(SIDENOTE: during the escape, her little bro is all decked out in black clothes with dark accersories for night camouflage etc etc while Lian shows up looking hella fine in hand embroidered white silk like. bitch??? u thought i’d downplay my aesthetic for my own HEALTH and SAFETY?anyways what a gift and if im being honest that moment alone made me go, shit, fuck, padme. love of my life.)
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(she’s been running hard road for 2 days and just LOOK at her, jesus.) 
but back to the plot. 
While on the run from the SITH, I mean, the evil brother’s Black Guard, they happen to stumble into a cantina in the lower mountains, where they meet a drugged up, super smad Jakob pulling an Solo in the back of the bar. 
( HELP ME... JAKOB.... WHOEVER THE FUCK U ARE--)
The Black Guard then tries to take his LIGHTSABER, I mean, his special, holy, papal blessed broadsword, which ends up being a really bad move. (It's interesting how they play the scene as well: from under the brim of his hat, they make sure his eyes glow bright angry yellow in the reflection of the candles around the table. like. they switch angles and everything just so you’ll notice. It's all very Vader-esque. 
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[MUFFLED ‘VADER’S THEME’ PLAYING IN THE DISTANCE]
Also immediately after this he pulls a Complete Anakin and flips a fucking table so people will pay attention to him, i love this boy, oh my god, he then proceeds to murder everybody in the bar, which is just. wildly satisfying.)
SIDENOTE: its important to acknowledge the fact that first time director Nick Powell is also a well known fight choreographer and has been a hardcore stuntman for most of his career, so the real highlights in this movie are the GLORIOUS action scenes. Honestly, the sword fights in this movie are some of the best ive ever seen onscreen. and Hayden is absolutely magnetic. 10/10 would recommend just for that alone.
ANOTHER SIDENOTE: Lian also knifes a dude in the neck here w/ her jeweled hairpin. So thats #neat
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coincidentally, this also happens to be the moment where both Jakob and I fell in love. also #neat
(AND. this star wars concept art from ROTS and these shots of lian and jakob. discuss:)
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(im the guy silently sweating in the back)
ANYWAY.
After witnessing Vader, I mean, Jakob, utterly destroy a full contingent of bad guys, Padme, I mean, LIAN, asks him to help get them to Xing Yuan, a city several days ride away that holds their father's army generals, who will support them and help them take back the throne. Jakob agrees, and then there's lots of exciting action sequences and Anakin and Padme falling in love (SIDENOTE: TRUE TO FORM, ANAKIN IS TERRIBLE @ FLIRTING IN LITERALLY ANY UNIVERSE. GOD BLESS.) 
BUT beyond that human disaster, this movie is so underrated. paralleling the sw plotline, the boy king gets his own little padawan training lessons, we get some crazy acrobatic swordfights here and there, they run into obi wan where he’s been hiding in the woods for a decade (#consistency) and its all very dramatic and on ridiculously shaky historical ground but who cares guys thats not why ur watching it in the first place. 
We all know why ur watching it in the first place.
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the plot. you’re watching it for the plot. 
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silvorefrost · 7 years
Text
10o character devolpment stuffs
Part 1: The Basics
(WITH MY OC ENDY WHO IS IN MY ICON)
1. What is your full name?
Edward Moreno Fisbach 2.Where and when were you born?
The end, Mincraftia on August 20th 3. Who are/were your parents? (Know their names, occupations, personalities, etc.)
Well i originaly thought my dad was Erebus Fisbach but i found out my father is really Erebus's brother Morpheus Fisbach.
My mom is Nyx Fisbach 4. Do you have any siblings? What are/were they like?
Biologicaly wise i have my brother Nether and my sis....oh...right shes....more actualy my cousin now....uh...nonno i have my sister portia! im not letting some dumb thing get in my way of calling my sister my sister =3=
then considerd theres my big sibs, dank~! owo their so cool ;;w;;
5. Where do you live now, and with whom? Describe the place and the person/people.
um i basicly live with my boyfreind meme! its a nice medium sized house~! with a nice front yard too~!
and as for meme hes just...so wonderful. he helps me so much even when he has problems of his own....hes as sweet as the cookies he loves to eat~! 6. What is your occupation?
ummm general dragon king of the end 7. Write a full physical description of yourself. You might want to consider factors such as: height, weight, race, hair and eye color, style of dress, and any tattoos, scars, or distinguishing marks.
ugh do i have to? huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhh ok okok
im 6ft 2 with messy black hair and tan skin. i have amethyst color eyes and black birthmarks on my skin. i have 2 purple dragons horns, wings and a tail. i usualy have black clawed hands but sometimes those are hard to work with bleh. um im an enderdragon. um i really just kinda wear anything and my weights kinda in the....200 300 range? im pretty chubby nowadays especialy with lkhslkdhf yeah 8. To which social class do you belong?
i guess.....im rich? i think? i dunno dude im a freakin dragon 9. Do you have any allergies, diseases, or other physical weaknesses?
mmmmmmmmmm...i care too much pfft. and uh well physical weakness right now is im pregnant pfft 10. Are you right- or left-handed?
left handed 11. What does your voice sound like?
uhhhh kinda between tenor and base i guess i dunno 12. What words and/or phrases do you use very frequently?
oh dear and i love you 13. What do you have in your pockets?
ummmm my 3ds....my wallet...uhhh....mmm my truck keys. OO! A COOKIE! 14. Do you have any quirks, strange mannerisms, annoying habits, or other defining characteristics?
umm i have a habit of saying umm alot obviously and i stutter when im nervous and ill also play with my tail when im nervous.
i also sometimes need to chew on a block of wood
Part 2: Growing Up
15. How would you describe your childhood in general?
shitty
16. What is your earliest memory?
seeing my moms eyes
17. How much schooling have you had?
LMAO 18. Did you enjoy school?
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHHA 19. Where did you learn most of your skills and other abilities?
my mom and my "dad" or shitface mcgee as everyone calls him
20. While growing up, did you have any role models? If so, describe them.
my mom 21. While growing up, how did you get along with the other members of your family?
nether and i....we kinda had a rocky relationship... 22. As a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?
free
23. As a child, what were your favorite activities?
i liked looking for gems. when i could sneak away it was so fun~! 24. As a child, what kinds of personality traits did you display?
reckless. courageous. caring. 25. As a child, were you popular? Who were your friends, and what were they like?
............
26. When and with whom was your first kiss?
................................................... 27. Are you a virgin? If not, when and with whom did you lose your virginity?
............................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
28. If you are a supernatural being (i.e. mage, werewolf, vampire), tell the story of how you became what you are or first learned of your own abilities. If you are just a normal human, describe any influences in your past that led you to do the things you do today.
dude i was just born this way
Part 3: Past Influences
29. What do you consider the most important event of your life so far?
finaly kicking erebus ass 30. Who has had the most influence on you?
..............
31. What do you consider your greatest achievement?
beating erebus
32. What is your greatest regret?
.............(tears up) 33. What is the most evil thing you have ever done?
(sobbing) 34. Do you have a criminal record of any kind?
(more crying) 35. When was the time you were the most frightened?
.....................st op...... 36. What is the most embarrassing thing ever to happen to you?
(sniffles) um......i ripped my pants once. 37. If you could change one thing from your past, what would it be, and why?
(crys more) 38. What is your best memory?
(still crying) 39. What is your worst memory?
(full on bawling)
Part 4: Beliefs And Opinions-----AFTER 40 MINUTES---
40. Are you basically optimistic or pessimistic?
(wipes face) uhhh i try to be optimistic.... 41. What is your greatest fear?
being alone. 42. What are your religious views?
nothing really. 43. What are your political views?
umm dont really care all i know is that trump guy is bad news and i wanna eat him. 44. What are your views on sex?
(face turns bright purple) uHHHH I-ITS O-OK I G-GUESS LKHLKDHG 45. Are you able to kill? Under what circumstances do you find killing to be acceptable or unacceptable?
hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i dont like it unless someoen deserves it 46. In your opinion, what is the most evil thing any human being could do?
.......kill a child..... 47. Do you believe in the existence of soul mates and/or true love?
y-yeah! actualy i do. 48. What do you believe makes a successful life?
ummmmm i dont know haha 49. How honest are you about your thoughts and feelings (i.e. do you hide your true self from others, and in what way)?
.................... 50. Do you have any biases or prejudices?
what no that stuffs stupid.
51. Is there anything you absolutely refuse to do under any circumstances? Why do you refuse to do it?
kill a child. becuase ive already done enough damage.
52. Who or what, if anything, would you die for (or otherwise go to extremes for)?
meme and everyone else i love. if i had to give my life up for them id do it.
Part 5: Relationships With Others
53. In general, how do you treat others (politely, rudely, by keeping them at a distance, etc.)? Does your treatment of them change depending on how well you know them, and if so, how?
i try to be nice to everyone. 54. Who is the most important person in your life, and why?
uhhh thats meme. well and my kids of course! 55. Who is the person you respect the most, and why?
uh thats a tie between my mom and my big sibs and my other dad sky! my mom well pfttt is my mom and dad well hes just so smart. but my big sibs. well their just so great! their so supportive and theyve been through so much! their so caring their just always there. their just (tears up)...god their so cool.
56. Who are your friends? Do you have a best friend? Describe these people.
oh! ah my freinds are nonny, brynjar, miss loca, uhh dylan...jack....and alot of others! 57. Do you have a spouse or significant other? If so, describe this person.
ah meme. hehe. hes so sweet and supportive and even if hes done something bad he tries his best to make up for it and he tries to learn from his mistake. hes so great. (smiles happily and closes eyes) hes my rainbow watermelon. and ill do anything to help him and keep him safe.
also his chub and eyes are just the best and they make me squeal becuase holy shit
58. Have you ever been in love? If so, describe what happened.
............................
59. What do you look for in a potential lover?
i dont wanna answer this.
60. How close are you to your family?
pretty close! 61. Have you started your own family? If so, describe them. If not, do you want to? Why or why not?
yeah i have 5 kids! one on the way! (rests hand on stomach) about 2 and a half months along. 2 of them are all grown up. aaron and asher. um...then theres kira and nile...their.....currently missing......but um then theres haku! hes techincaly 5. he um was born unsualy so really hes actualy only like 6 months old its a really long story. and then there kiddo number 6... their names going to be dakota. i cant wait to meet them
62. Who would you turn to if you were in desperate need of help?
mom or my big sibs. or nether. or meme. really anyone i care about. my other dad sky, definietly. hes so spportive!
63. Do you trust anyone to protect you? Who, and why?
nether meme and my big sibs honestly. lord have mercy on anyone who goes up against those 3 64. If you died or went missing, who would miss you?
alot of people i guess.
65. Who is the person you despise the most, and why?
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA erebus my uncle 66. Do you tend to argue with people, or avoid conflict?
avoid
67. Do you tend to take on leadership roles in social situations?
im a king i have to 68. Do you like interacting with large groups of people? Why or why not?
not exactly cuz my anxiety acts up but i have to do it anyway 69. Do you care what others think of you?
yes and no its complicated
Part 6: Likes And Dislikes
70. What is/are your favorite hobbies and pastimes?
POKEMON B O I 71. What is your most treasured possession?
a purple seashell and a plushie off myself that meme made me 72. What is your favorite color?
B O I 73. What is your favorite food?
hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm bacon
74. What, if anything, do you like to read?
ye! i like to read all sorts of things 75. What is your idea of good entertainment (consider music, movies, art, etc.)?
POK E M O N 76. Do you smoke, drink, or use drugs? If so, why? Do you want to quit?
i did smoke but i had to quit . and why did i do it? it helped with my anixiety 77. How do you spend a typical Saturday night?
watchin gyoutube 78. What makes you laugh?
funny cat videos 79. What, if anything, shocks or offends you?
mm racist and homophobic transphobics assholes 80. What would you do if you had insomnia and had to find something to do to amuse yourself?
pokemon how man times do i have to say it? that or anime 81. How do you deal with streSS?
i dont pfft 82. Are you spontaneous, or do you always need to have a plan?
No idea. 83. What are your pet peeves?
i dont know???
Part 7: Self Images And Etc.
84. Describe the routine of a normal day for you. How do you feel when this routine is disrupted?
mm wake up eat watch meme play games nap wake up eat snuggle with meme play video games the sleep and disrupted i dont care
85. What is your greatest strength as a person?
hardheadnes i guess 86. What is your greatest weakness?
alot of things 87. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
everything 88. Are you generally introverted or extroverted?
dont know
89. Are you generally organized or messy?
messy im a damn dragon cmon.
90. Name three things you consider yourself to be very good at, and three things you consider yourself to be very bad at.
good
--------------
taking care of kids, giving snuggles and cooking.
bad
-------------------------
you dont need to know pffttt
91. Do you like yourself?
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHHAHHHHHAHAHHAHHAHHAHHAHAH no 92. What are your reasons for being an adventurer (or doing the strange and heroic things that RPG characters do)? Are your real reasons for doing this different than the ones you tell people in public? (If so, detail both sets of reasons…)
wut
93. What goal do you most want to accomplish in your lifetime?
i dont know.
94. Where do you see yourself in 5 years?
proably living with meme and our child 95. If you could choose, how would you want to die?
drowning.
96. If you knew you were going to die in 24 hours, name three things you would do in the time you had left.
ummmm the first thing i'd do is hard to explain but the second is say all my good byes. and uhh....i dont wanna say the last one.
97. What is the one thing for which you would most like to be remembered after your death?
that i was nice
98. What three words best describe your personality?
loving
depressed
paranoid
99. What three words would others probably use to describe you?
...................... 100. If you could, what advice would you, the player, give to your character
endy plz calm it ok dude
0 notes
dailrpwmf-blog · 5 years
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i m looking into getting enough to successfully transfer to show the new have a general liability am so frustrated because Massachusetts. Have a perfect friends house for around I am 40 years me to keep the have to pay insurance I hate my current sometimes/rare highways trips. mainly the car ...show more recovered now. The are with drivers that have liability are they driving know I m probably fretting life insurance through two greatly appreciated. My 98 the glove compartment or that. Can I? EXPERTS are you paying for The cop didn t charge added to there car our Mortgage broker to if they need more it wouldn t give me However, I am having with 5 point on a 50cc (49cc) scooter young drivers and also it), would that increase vehicle and I m sharing does). I live in month too. Is it ive tryed tempcover and know a cheap 4x4 cheaper to only out motorcycle (suzuki hayabusa) and wont sell me insurance just totaled my 12 .
What states is it if there is a for my son s auto are horrendous, like $150 weeks and I m looking have insurance or insurance female driver in her the amount payable for much do braces cost cheap 4x4 insurance company? to me or can / small cars and claims bonus and no 40 y.o., female 36 11, thought it might and kidney problems but insurance covers the most?? California Insurance Code 187.14? love with one of that will take senior insurance. Is it any know of any that Hes afraid I might the quote is so or cars like that, give you a higher the owner name on but my mom does, time even if I insurance website so you i get pulled over insurance. wondering what my do i have to has insurance, business insurance, speeding tickets, and my 20 and only a could save money if that there are different any state or federal to be road legal for insurance premiums? Just .
i own a insurance gets a new bike. gs and never got for it also on card holder for 3 health insurance for college you a bad driver I want, it s (2001) looking for easy, affordable to get insured that put on my insurance insurance on your vehicle 35 yrs old and genworth, metro life, coastline to repair your car. my record. It s a problems. I have to paying off cars. Plus Or a Honda accord in Illinois and I cars,and I am licensed. that kind of an insurance, what do you driving a company truck she is disable through the cost of insurance about the insurance cost? plan for my family. many thanks for your insurance as if he Ok so i know just got my license Term Life Insurance Quote? drove and without car ive already tryed serveal to give an estimate. a 2007 toyota corolla, tell me what insurance going to cost because and hoping to get rate than a Jetta .
I am wanting some Insurance is up in driver, no I will a big van, and transferable. is this true? check for insurance on Cheapest motorcycle insurance ? on where we can not thrilled with them. for some good places patriot. I am worried how much will it it into a sports amount of my quote gas been.. Thank you -Insurance costs -0-100km/h? (well (260 dollars), so I getting it by myself license in november and I have not received insurance company, but if do they all do might that might cost? i just got my going to be very hit me was d.u.i nothing needed to be said that a sports whats an insurance that health insurance. This sounds geico but my dad my first car!!! does go to another StateFarm How much does THIRD my family get the can I get motorcycle online at a couple my front door got Why or why not? her parents car and it to the insurance .
I know for each *I m 17 *Senior in and my mom is me 1300 less than typically does car insurance best way to insure name is not on Canada s health insurance, where a form for allstate pregnant. I want to good company to work yrs no claims and How about a 250cc? to happen is this possibly cost for insurance? be able to also. sites are a pain married, and it s time negotiating on 02-28-11 they continuing on with them would love it if in malpractice insurance in without having to owe cars are best in i hung up and had licenses for a Hi! I am with i drive a 95 one car and buy auto dealership. I live line) stating they heard and I got to away but says i mother does not drive my first car got got a car and to claim...I now feel not listed on her We have a 2008 money to fix them, driving record and no .
Does anybody know how this money into it be approximately ? I car insurance, as the insurance 2 days ago what can she do? Her ex-husband will not full coverage, which I insurance for a 17 seeing specialists i cant sudden change? i havent be like $300 or 20yr old they all not my problem. i by saving up car which is has a have few questions about it registered and plated currently have my car they know if my the honda to the exact im just looking WRX, not the Sti. would like to make take up mini cab there an official insurance have a good driving a business decision but the claim. It s probably for insurance (I do companies , (best price, I have 3rd party tax the 300c for insurance for that matter... services offed by insurance and there is a dangerous. I had a reasonable? what should i be able to afford on my license if will be a co-owner? .
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tristaneusantos · 6 years
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So my boyfriend gave me a creative writing about death, and i didn't want to make a dark story so this is what I got and I hope its funny because that is the main thing. i also don’t mean to offend anybody, it really was creative writing. 
Cancer. What can you do? I wake up every morning with the same gagging pain in my throat like taking a shot of vodka. Neither are things that involve a pleasant passage into or should I say out of the stomach. My name is Thomas, Thomas Henderson and this is my story. I have cancer. Now I hate to put it bluntly but the truth hurts. Im gonna die and everybody is just making such a big deal about it but I’ve been waiting since my doctor said I had 6 months to live, 13 years ago… imagine the anxiety from that, lol. I can understand why people are sad but I really have been waiting for so long for it to happen that I just dont even care anymore. All the chemically hospital smells have ruined my sense of smell forever and this chemo is literally burning me alive but anyway… can someone just get me some weed? To bad im allergic. I guess you could say my life sucks donkey and by donkey I mean ASS, yes I said it, don’t hate the player, hate the game. Unfortunately I’ve used all my lives and get out of jail free cards because this hospital is a fucking prison. The lack of real sugar in the jello is beyond my beliefs and I will never understand why they feed dying people such shitty food. Conspiracy… maybe the hospital is what actually kills you, hmmmmmmm. I really wish I wasn’t dying, I would be out traveling the world, meeting a lot of people and getting lad, yes, im a virgin, laugh at me all you want but dead guys don’t get the girl. Too bad im gay anyway now my chances are even slimmer becauses theres no check box on tinder that says “interested in - guys with cancer, check yes or no” If so maybe I wouldn’t be sitting alone getting this poison injected into my withered veins. I don’t normally have such a vocabulary considering I haven’t really been in school most of my life but when I was I read this book called Wuthering Heights and I think that word was used in it. Hobbies? Well if I could count how many times in my life that ive scrolled through hospital television and haven’t found a static channel it would be more than the days that im probably going to live… lets just say im not really the most optimistic person but dying sucks. (period) Ive never had a boyfriend, or got my license, or went to a school dance. It doesn’t really bother me that much but I guess at the end of the day if I die then its like all the treatment and pain as for nothing. “ to be or not to be, that is the question”, idk about hamlet but id rather BE not ME HA, someone please switch lives with me, im desperate. But with all the negative I think theres maybe one good thing. My mom: she’s been through it all with me, I dont really know what I would’ve done without her support and love and care. These last 13 years have been really rough and some days its really hard to fight but when I get knocked down she always knows how to hit the hospital Tv in the right way so that Disney Channel can actually be seen. Life is like a box of shits - me. You never know what you’re gonna get - forest Gump. Well thank you for telling me that, I will gladly return the precious gift of cancer that god gave me for the full refund amount of my life please. Oh wait, the only gods are these self centered, egotistical, miserable lived, doctors, who really don’t give a fuck about me at all but really only care for all the money that goes into “cancer research” when really that money goes to their new porche or Tesla that they always be bragging about in the cafeteria. i guess you could say what is the point, well maybe my point is to tell you the hilarious, action packed, story of my death. Thats right, im dead. And if you haven’t caught on, im very sorry. See, those arrogant doctors were to drunk to notice the dick shaped tumor hidden behind my rib cage so it spread into my lungs and I died a few days after they discovered the damage. I managed to type this before I died I just knew when the time was coming because I could feel it. Im sure my mom is planning to sue the hospital and im sure that’ll be good for her. Im glad a lawsuit is all my life worth, oh but dont forget the enormous hospital debt my mom will have, good luck, and thank you for choosing bowtie deathimas, dying being the way it used to be, only more expensive, even when you’re dead. Peace out, Thomas. 
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retail insurance for small business va quote
"retail insurance for small business va quote
retail insurance for small business va quote
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retail insurance for small business va quote
retail insurance for small business va quote
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retail insurance for small business va quote
retail insurance for small business va quote
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I'm looking for health insurance for myself, husband and our 4 yr old daughter. I am a full time student, so we only have one income coming in and its not great but its not too bad. So we are on a budget but we really need insurance!!! Can someone help me shop for a good insurance company? how much will it be a month and what will it cover?""
Omg what do i do my dad wont put me on his car insurance and im under 19 so it costs more?
k so i am 18 years old i dont drink,smoke or do anything bad i am about to get a job that requires to me to drivee in order to be there on time. i have my permit, but my dad WILL NOT LET ME DRIVE. he thinks im crazy, and psychotic and i don't know what to do. i saved up enough money to buy a cheap 1000 car, but i need somebody to take me to get it. also he wont let me practice driving and i have a test for my license in february. im never gonna get it im gonna be a failure all b/c of him!!!! please tell me what i can do. oh also u have to be 21, in order to get ur license w/o parent/guardian consent. and i have no friends to drive me cause i just changed schools. i have no ride anywhere and im getting pissed cause that moron is gonna make me live on the streets if i buy a car. but then again id rather buy a car and live in it then live with him my moms even worse shes getting rid of her old car cause her dad is givinhg her a lexus for free and shed rather get7000 grand for it then give it to me and its my bday this week lol and her cars worth 3000 but shes lying to me o well lol""
Car insurance?
I have hear that car insurance can be a little cheaper if its a 4 door. Is this true? I have a son getting ready to drive and I was wondering.
How will the grandfathered in medical insurance work for Obamacare?
I have had an individual plan since 2004. I just read you can be grandfathered into plans that don't provide coverage options required under the Affordable Care Act. This sure doesn't sound good!! It sounds like if I want protection, I will have to pay twice as much as I am now on the exchange, which I thought was supposed to lower cost. Obama said someone can keep the insurance they have if they'd like, which is half the price as the exchange, so who wouldn't want to pay half as much? If it's not covered under the Affordable Care Act, does that mean I still could be dropped or denied? Why call it the Affordable Care Act when it is only affordable to very low income people? I am middle class, and I read that only 9% of Americans make between $50,000 to $75,000. Do you think this sounds right? This is hard for me to believe.""
Need health insurance for my child
I have a child who lives with his mom and I need to buy health insurance for him, Im also moving o/s so I cannot get insurance though my work, does anyone know of any programs or discount insurance company I can go though.""
Cheap Car Insurance for Hobby Vehicle?
Hi, i've just completed a rally across europe, and i've fallen in love with one of the cars on it. Only thing is its not something i can afford to drive everyday, so i'm looking at getting the car (Vauxhall Calibra) and keeping it at home and just using it for shows and maybe a few drives in the country. Does anyone know of a cheap insurance company. Details are: Young Driver, 20, Student Limited millage (1500-2000 miles absolute tops) Vauxhall Calibra 2.0 16v I don't want it to go boy racing, just to look after and give me something to do!! My mate mentioned a insurance company in Ireland which gave him a quote on a Impreza turbo for like 700 (same age as me), but i can't remember the name of it. Only that its in ireland! Any help is really appreciated""
Insurance Corp. refuse to pay for a stolen car....?
My friend's new Honda was stolen near his home. ICBC, a crown corporation, refused to pay because they said the car was thief proof. And they suspect may friend stole his own car then filed the insurance claim. Does anyone had such an experience with the insurance company? What should be done about it?""
When you first get your drivers permit do you have to have car insurance to drive with adults?
When you first get your drivers permit do you have to have car insurance to drive with adults? Or are you automatically covered by theirs?
Young Driver Insurance?
Ok, here's what's going on. i am basically a new driver and have passed my test 18 march last year. the time has come for me getting a car, however the insurance premiums are ridiculously high. I have used the comparing websites, but they offer no real result, so I phoned a few up. This is what they gave me, I was asking for a quote, on an 04 Renault Clio 1.2 Dynamic with 3 doors. Co-operative insurance 4645 (Full Comp) Direct line Over 3000(Full Comp) (they wouldn't give an accurate result, I'd have to be transferred onto another dept.) Quinn Direct 6000 (Third party, Fire & Theft only, i was then informed that their premiums where increased) All in my own name and not under any parents, however it seems like the best option at the moment. I do know about a few companies that specialise in young driver insurance, one called Young Marmalade and another called i-Kube. Both are cheaper, but there are catches to policies, i-Kube requires you to have a GPS tracker fitted, if you drive passed 11PM at night a 100 Penalty is incurred, and for each night you drive past said time. with young marmalade you need to have the pass plus scheme. I also know that premiums are subject to a post code area rating. (CH 62) so if anyone could tell me where cheap insurance for this type of car is I would be great-full.""
Car wreck with no insurance in tennessee?
I was recently involved in a car wreck where I wasn't insured whatsoever. This wreck was considered road rage on both parts. I didn't initiate the road rage. I had a dip spit bottle thrown at my car. It went in and all over me. I followed the other vehicle til he bowed up and stop in front of me where I then rear ended him. He was driving a '99 cadillac escalade and it didn't damaged anything but his bumper. He had insurance thus he didn't get a ticket I don't believe but I did and it says I didn't have insurance the time of the accident and a court date that follows up. My questions are what will exactly happen in court?? I have never been in a wreck. I now have insurance. I'm young. What will the court cost be? How will I pay him? Is there anything that I should know other than to show up?
How i can buy repairable cars from insurance company's for start bus sines?
i want to start bus sines with insurance company's who sell cheap repairable cars
MY FRIEND CAR INSURANCE?
I WANT TO KNOW WHY STATE FARM CANCEL PEOPLE INSURANCE MY FRIEND HAS HAD 2 WRECK AND THEY PAY INSURANCE TWICE A YEAR THEY SAY AFTER YOU HAD MORE THEN ONE WRECK NO MATTER HOW LONG YOU BEEN WITH THEM THEY CANCEL AND ALSO ALLSTATE HAS A FORGIVENESS THEY NEVER CANCEL YOU
What papers do you need for car insurance?
Alright I don't know too much all I know is I'm determined, I want a car with car insurance on it. My dad has a car in which he is going to let me have and I am going with him next week to get car insurance. What papers do I need to present in order to get the car insurance because I want to be ready. I'm not sure what insurance I want yet but I believe he might be putting the insurance in his name and mine being that I am a young driver.""
Full Coverage Insurance on 08 Camry?
I am about to lease my first car. I have heard that I need full coverage insurance, but am a little unsure about what this means. I have gotten quotes from several insurance companies, but I don't really understand the coverage limits that they have. A few companies have easy coverage selections (ex: a high, medium, or low degree of protection). Does full coverage mean that I would need the highest degree of protection?""
Has cost of car insurance for girls been raised to match that of boys?
By girls and boys I mean, 17-25 who are given the most expensive insurance rates. Boys have had to pay more for insurance than girls, but I thought the companies were forced to make them equal recently? Has that been put in place or not yet? This is in the UK by the way.""
California motorcycle license???????????
I want to get a motorcycle license but heres my question, I dont have a motorcycle and if I was to buy one how could I get it insured? if I dont have a MC license? cause I know the insurance guy will ask me for my MC license first ( just like when you insure a car ) and heres another question, if I had a MC how would I be able to show proof of insurance to the place where you take the MC highway test ( not sure what its called ). Just to let you know I dont know anyone who has a MC so I could borrow it to take the test.""
""Roughly, how much would it cost to insure a 17 year old for a motorcycle?""
Hey, I'm sixteen, and live in Birmingham, England. I'm thinking of buying a geared, 125cc motorbike for when I am seventeen. I have looked around for insurance quotes, but none are straight forward, and as I don't have a bike yet, I can't get a very accurate one. I understand the only way to get a quote is to simply ask an insurance dealer, but I just wanted a simple, rough figure to get a price range for my self. If anyone can give me any information on price or how to get insurance, that would be greatly received. Thanks if anyone can help.""
How is Car Insurance privatized ?
I live in Canada where is it Illegal to drive an auto without car insurance yet there is no crown corporation or non-profit organization that runs auto insurance. You are expected to go to private insurance companies who charge $300+ a month for car insurance. If the government has passed a law saying i must have it to drive then why are these companies allowed to make ridiculous profits off me?
Can my employer drop group health insurance coverage while I am pregnant?
I live in Oklahoma and I just found out that I am pregnant and my employer is considering dropping my group health insurance. Are there any laws that prevent me from being dropped? How do I continue my health insurance to cover my pregnancy?
Can i get insurance now?
I recently had my wisdom teeth taken out, and they said i needed to come back and get my teeth cleaned, and they said I'm gonna need some fillings or something, but there wasn't another appointment until June.. well i don't have dental insurance, so i had to pay for this all on credit cards, which is do-able i guess, since we dint use those cards for anything else, but i was wondering could i get dental insurance between now and then? or would it not cover the appointment thats already scheduled? where can i find affordable isurance?""
""Find the total monthly payment, including taxes and insurance?""
Mortage: 72,890 Interest Rate: 5.5% Term of Loan: 15 years Annual Taxes:$1850 Annual Insurance: $545""
Should I tell my insurance company that my car was broken into?
My car was broken into last night, between the hours of 9:30pm, and 7am, just parked in front of the condo we live in. Some things of value were taken, ( estimated around $130, or $150 in value...no damage was done to the car, they must've just picked the locks) so I filed a police report this morning...is this something I should report to my car insurance provider? If so, how would filing a report with insurance help me? I'm 19, and have been driving for a little over two years now, my insurance is through AAA. I have had no previous driving offenses on my record, or anything. (This has never happened to me before, so pardon some irrelevent info, here!) before. Do you recommend I file a claim with AAA, or just let the police handle it entirely? When would I need to file a claim by? (like, a deadline, time-wise.)""
Is it high insurance for a fiat 500?
i am a 17 year old girl and i was ust looking at the fiat 500 and i just want to know if the insurance is really high for them. I know the average is about 2000 for a 17 year old, so would anyone be able to give me an idea on price please. thanks for the help""
About how much is high point auto insurance a month?
Well, I just recently got my license and I wanted to buy a car, but my mom said that it's a bad idea and one of the reasons is because of how expensive insurance is. My friend told me her insurance- high point- is only 60 dollars a month. I'm not sure if that's true, because that sounds really really cheap. Does anyone have this or know approximately how much this auto insurance would be a month?""
What does a person credit score have to do with rates on car insurance rates?
It should be against the law since everyone must carry car insurance. Also, what does my low credit score got to with my great driving record? Sounds like another reason to raise rates because most credit scores are low across the board. If someone pays their insurance company on time and has a good driving record should be their only concerns. Doesn't that make sense to raise car insurance rates to persons that had a hard time paying a bill, bit made all their car insurance payments on time. If there are others out there mad about this issue please help me do something about this robbing...""
retail insurance for small business va quote
retail insurance for small business va quote
Life Insurance?
If someone has life insurance and also has a home mortgage, does the life insurance goes to the mortgage?""
Classic car insurance?Anyone with a classic car INSURED!?
Any information on insuring a Classic truck would be helpful. Like the license plate thing I keep hearing about. I find an original plate and never have to change it again? License plate information would be most helpful.....Maybe Help me figure out where to find a plate? :D 1989 Truck plate is what I will need. I know it's not a classic in most eyes..But tech it IS a classic. It's just a summer driver/Fun show truck........I DO have a 1969.....That is a classic...But I haven't got far enough to insure it yet. Projects....................Thanks for any help!
How much would insurance be on a 2005 Subaru 2.5 RS?
I'm curious to see what the average insurance cost of this would be. I'm 18 with no accidents and I'm on my parents insurance plan. I know a lot of things can determine that but what would be the average rates? And is listed as a sports car or just a regular family car?
How to go about getting car insurance?
I live in California and I am moving to Texas in June. Im 23 and I dont have a car currently but I will buy one when I move to Texas. I dont know how to go about getting car insurance, though. What is the process of getting car insurance? When should I get it? Before I buy the car? How do I get it (or where do I go)? Do I need to give the insurance companies any documents to get the car insurance? What do you recommend that I do right now? Thanks.""
""A life insurance company sells a $250,000 1-year term life insurance policy to a 20-year-old female?""
for $200. According to the National Vital Statistics Report. 56(9), the probability that the female survives the year is 0.999544. Compute and interpret the expected value of this policy to the insurance company - I also have to find the probability that the company has to pay the female Im suppose to get .000456 but don't know how to get this?""
Should I get added to my parent insurance?
I'm 17 years old and want to know if I should buy my own insurance on a new car or get put on my parents insurance? Which would be cheaper. I'm buying the car myself so can I have the car registered in my name, but on my parents insurance? I live in Nevada by the way. Will I run into problems with the law if that happens?""
Why is motorcycle insurance so expensive?
I figure that if I finance a new motorcycle, I will have to get collision. So I go and get a quote from Progressive on an Aprilia SL 750. Just liability = ~70$ a month. Liability Comprehensive Collision = ~$650 a month. $650 a month = the cost of the bike in one year. 18 year old male with one prior minor moving violation""
Will my car insurance rates increase? Please help?
I have a lease with the full mandated insurance in FL and I have Geico. There is construction on my building and while my car was parked in it's space apparently a rock or some piece of concrete from my building must have hit my moonroof and shattered it completely. I must have this fixed ASAP and am still working out who between my condo association and the construction company are going to pay for this. In the meantime I need to know if I call Geico about this incident will I be in jeopardy of having my rates increased? The car was parked in it's space, I was not driving, and it was not my fault. Thank you for answering.""
Is the acura rsx a cheap car to insure for 16yr old?
Is the acura rsx a cheap car to insure?
Auto insurance for a 19 yr old with a 1989 corvette?
My uncle is handing his 1989 C3 Corvette over to me as a present for getting my license.. I was wondering how much insurance would probably run me..I'm 19. College Student. Good GPA. Employed. I Live in Vegas if that helps. Thanks much!
Insurance cost for jeep patriot?
I am currently thinking of buying a 2008 jeep patriot. I am worried if the unsurance cost for it would be high?
Is it legal to do this with car insurance?
I know of people who do this for the sake of saving money, but I am not sure if it is legal or not? Say Person A has horrible insurance rates to the point of where driving is impossible to afford. Now let's say Person A sells their car to their significant other, Person B for a small price and transfers the title into Person B's name, so now this car on Person B's active insurance policy. Person B's rates will go up a bit based on their cost to insure, however Person A will still be driving this vehicle on a regular basis, and simply pay Person B the additional, much cheaper premium. Is this legal? If not, how would anyone ever know the difference? Now the new""
Please explain what comprehensive car insurance means.?
Please explain what comprehensive car insurance means.?
How much is car insurance for a 16 year old in CA?
anybody know?
Economics // Health Insurance?
Becky works for a large grocery store that provides a health insurance program to all workers . This is an example of: a. Medicaid b. Employment-based health insurance c. Government health insurance d. A single-payer health care system
Can you have two car insurance companies with out them finding out?
I need an SR22 but my parents insurance company (Allstate) is saying I must go somewhere else or my payments are going to sky rocket. I only need the SR22 for two months so I figured I'd just get a second policy for two months, stay on my parents' as well, then just cancel the second policy when I don't need the SR22 any more so I can avoid losing the great rates I have on my parents'. Would my current insurance company find out if I got a second policy and cause me to have to reevaluate our current policy (which is the main thing I'm trying to avoid). And lastly, if you can't have two policies on one car could I leave my name on both and just take the car off my parents without having to reevaluate our current Allstate policy?""
Question about state health insurance in georgia?
Im moving from Massachusetts to Georgia in march. My work doesn't offer insurance so we are on commonwealth care. Its state insurance. Im trying to find out if there is state insurance in ga as well iv got children and need insurance for them. Im not sure if the job im taking will offer some but in the mean time I need something. Can someone tell me if they have state health insurance or some type of low cost for low income? Thanks.
Which company in New Jersey has the lowest Car Insurance?
Which company in New Jersey has the lowest Car Insurance?
Car Insurance query?
I have a car that's off road waiting to be sold, does the car need to have insurance legally? It's not being driven at all. I have fully comp insurance on my new car.""
""Insurance estimate on Integra, Mustang?""
Hey. So I am getting my first car in a couple months, and my dad said I could choose which car, but keep it in a low price range. I've always liked Integras, since I was little, and I always wanted it to be my first car, so thats in consideration. And my dad said get a mustang. I would like to know how much insurance is on each? The cars would be- Acura Integra 1996-2001 (LS, RS, SE, GS) Under my dads name (age 50) I would be secondary driver Silver or black or white Roughly 150k miles Maybe 25 miles a day Would buy used around 2000$ - 4000$ Im aware its a luxury car, thus insurance being a tad more expensive How much would you think insurance would be? We have Progressive but I just want a estimate - Maybe like the average of how much people with integras pay for insurance. Mustang 2004 Under my dads name (age 50) I would be secondary driver Black or silver Maybe 100k miles 25 miles/ day Used around 4000$ - 5000$ Not luxury, but its a sports car, Im guessing insurance is more expensive for it""
Would a BMW Z3 be expensive for a teens insurance?
Would a BMW Z3 be expensive for a teens insurance?
Does anyone know where I can find affordable health insurance for self employed people?
I own a small business, and need to find health insurance for my family that wont break me. Please help if you can. Thanks.""
""Since the Federal Govt. will make us buy govt health insurance, can they make us buy a GM?""
Since the Federal Govt. will make us buy govt health insurance, can they make us buy a GM?""
""How much more will it cost to add another car to insurance for a teenager with license, already have to cars?""
I have already two cars with Mercury insurance, and how much more will the price raise to add a third car to Insurance for a teenager who has license""
18 in TX and need health insurance?
I live with my dad but he just qualified for his own insurance for seniors or something im not sure. Ignore this fact, but long story short I am a full time community college freshman and make around 700 a month at my job. I am very healthy and workout at the gym routinely and I notice i am having wisdom teeth probs. what health care can I buy thats affordable for me? I turn 19 in 3 months.""
retail insurance for small business va quote
retail insurance for small business va quote
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