#ive also already written more fanfiction so far than i did in all of last year. tho i wrote a lot more last year with my novels too

[n7punk]

so i've already updated more this year than i did during all of last year

[repulsivepangolin7]

SEAL Team fic. Crush pt1

A/N: So, I recently fell into yet another wormhole and binged the first two seasons of SEAL team in less time than I should have used to watch it. I figured out a few things: 1. This show is freaking awesome once you get your bearings. 2. Sonny is cool, I dig him. 3. I love Full Metal (Like seriously, what a highly qualified dork!) And 4. There is NOT ENOUGH Scott Carter (Full Metal) fanfiction.

Oh, and as some of you MIGHT know… I’m too hung up on H/C and whump… Word count: 1860

You forget to be scared after a while. That was the truth for some of them at least. The problem wasn’t when you were neck deep in a FUBAR situation, it was when you were trying to get some shut-eye at home in your own bed. You took a deep breath and pushed the fear down and moved on.

But one thing was for sure, life had an impeccable way of telling you to take a breather every once in a while. Nature’s way of telling you to slow down a bit. A sucking chest wound, an arterial bleed, blood loss, a massive concussion. You know, stuff like that.

He tried getting his bearings as the dust settled. Last thing he remembered was someone yelling ‘incoming’ and diving for cover.

His sight was blurred and all sound seemed warped. His ears was ringing and his head was spinning, but it was nothing compared to the immense pain that was his left leg.

He forced himself up on his elbows, positive he was going to hurl as the world tilted on its axis. The sight that met him didn’t help too much.

One of the concrete walls had caved and landed on his leg. He barely stopped himself from trying to tug his leg free, he knew damn well it wouldn’t budge and all that would happen was that the pain would tenfold and he would probably do more damage to his leg than there already was.

Blood was soaking his tactical pants right above where the concrete block ended. First thing needing to happen was a tourniquet, then he had to get that thing off of his leg.

He barely noticed Bravo 1 ordering a radio check and sit rep before the fifth time he called him up by his nickname.

“Yeah. I’m here. Hear you Lima Charlie.” He sucked some air through his teeth, “My leg’s stuck under some rubble. Think I busted it.”

“Do you need assistance getting loose?”

“A-firm.” he took a second look at the bloody mess under the block of concrete, “Gonna need a tourniquet and help moving as well.”

“Okay, you’ve got it.” Jason paused, “Bravo 4, this is Bravo 1, you’re closest to Full Metal. Can you get to him? Out.”

“Bravo 1, Bravo 4. Sure can! Out.”

 *          *          *

 “Oh, damn…” Trent grumbled as soon as he had a visual on Full Metal, “How bad is it brother?”

“Think my leg is crushed.”

“Actual crushed?”

“Worse than just a break…” Metal gave a minimal shrug, but the pain written all over his features spoke volumes, “Hurts like hell.”

Trent nodded as he sat down beside Full Metal. “Tourniquet first. Then we’ll figure out how to move this.”

Full Metal nodded a bit, “I will be of minimal help during that part of this OP.”

“What? When we’re moving the block of concrete?”

He grimaced, “Something tells me whatever pain I’m experiencing right now is just a taste test of what’s to come once the initial shock wears off and my leg actually gets jostled.”

“I think you might be right, buddy.” Trent nodded, “You might want to administer at least 10mg of morphine before we start.”

“Already did.” Metal answered and reached for the spent auto-injector pen in order to wave it around and show it to Trent.

“Is it enough?” he asked as he dug a tourniquet out of his gear.

“Look at my leg. What do you think?” Full Metal growled, “Not gonna take anymore just yet, I’m gonna need it later as well.”

“Pretty sure the rest of us will be willing to share ours.”

“I don’t want to take so much one of you will actually have to keep an eye on me, to monitor for overdose.”

“I think you’re big enough to handle 20mg of morphine.” Trent shrugged as he leaned forward in order to wrap the tourniquet around Full Metal’s thigh, “This is gonna hurt…”

Full Metal nodded and placed his gloved knuckled between his teeth.

Trent wasn’t surprised when Full Metal suddenly went lax. He didn’t know the full extent of his injury, but one thing was for sure, it had to be painful as all hell. Full Metal wasn’t exactly one to fuzz over nothing, actually, he wasn’t one to fuzz over anything as far as Trent knew him. And syncope was a natural response to pain.

“Bravo 1, this is Bravo 4. We need additional manpower here to get Full Metal loose. Out.”

“Bravo 4, good copy. You think you’ll get him loose if Bravo 2 and 3 join up?”

Trent looked over the rubble and Full Metal, “Might need more. I estimate this block of concrete weighs 2.5 metric tons. We also need someone to drag Full Metal free once we’ve got that weight off his leg. He passed out when I put on the TQ. Think he’s coming back around now…”

“Okay, Bravo 5 you keep watch on the south corner, alert us of any movement south or east. The rest of us, help Bravo 4.”

The confirmations came in one after another.

“Havoc, this is Bravo 1. We are forced to divert from our plan, please alert us of any movement close to our position. Out.”

“Bravo 1, Good copy. Do you need anything else? Out.”

“Might need medevac. Out.”

“Site is considered a hot-zone. Is it critical? Out?”

“Haven’t got eyes on yet. Stand by for further information. Out.”

 *          *          *

 Clay, Sonny, Ray and Jason managed to lift the concrete block enough for Trent to pull Full Metal out from under it. None of them surprised when the big guy passed out for a second time.

The guys let go of the slab and it fell down, resting on some other rubble 3 or 4 inches off the ground.

“Let’s try to check and stabilize his leg while he’s still unconscious.” Trent called out as he started cutting away at the fabric of Full Metal’s pants. “Clay, find quickclot combat gauze, tape and regular gauze. Sonny, find cravats or anything that can be used to splint his left leg against his right leg. Jason and Ray, anything that can be used as cushioning between his legs and between his left leg and the cravats.”

They all hurried to their tasks.

“How does it look?”

“Open fracture above his ankle and below his knee. Multiple deformities from knee down. Lots of soft tissue damage. He needs to get proper medical attention, he’s at high risk for crush syndrome.” Trent rattled off as he took the things Clay handed him, “Clay, can you find Sodium Bicarbonate, a peripheral IV line and a FAST1.”

“Sodium Bicarb, peripheral IV line and FAST1.” Clay nodded, “Got it.”

*          *          *

 He woke up to one of Trent’s thighs on each side of his head, not exactly his favorite position.

“Heya buddy, really hoped you would be out for 30 seconds more…” his teammate winked down at him. “I’m just gonna place a FAST1. Already have an orange IV running in your left arm. How are you feeling?”

“-Like I got run over by a wall.” Full Metal answered, trying to mask a grimace, “How’s my leg?”

“Crush injury, like you predicted. You’ve still got a pulse distal to most of the injuries, if you wondered about that. Have sodium bicarb trickling into that IV you have in your arm. We’re waiting for medevac, tricky situation with this still being a hot-zone.”

Metal nodded, “But I guess you think I need it?”

Trent nodded, “The sooner the better. But, I also think you could handle a couple of hours delay. I just want to avoid that if possible. We managed to cover the worst gashes and stabilize your left leg against your right while you were out of it.”

Full Metal nodded a bit, taking in the information. “So. Crush injury. Muscle mass gets damaged, releases toxins. Clogs up kidneys. Renal failure. Am I right?” Full Metal met Trent’s eyes.

“Kinda. But that’s what the sodium bicarb is for.” Trent winked, “That, and they’ll probably load you up with saline once medevac gets here. How’s your pain?”

“Way too damn high.” he rolled his eyes a little, “7, I guess.”

“I’d guess 8 or 9…” Trent shrugged, “You passed out. Twice.”

“Probably won’t be the last time either.”

Trent nodded, “But, just looking at you and listening to you. I’d guess about a 4.”

“That’s why we call him Full Metal…” Sonny winked as he came into Metal’s view as well, “Seriously man, you are allowed to show that this hurts. I would’ve sounded like an air-raid alert. How are ya?”

Full Metal shook his head a bit, “Not good.”

“Maybe you should take that second injector…” Trent said as he readied the FAST1 introducer, “No need for you to suffer more than necessary.”

“You said it yourself. This is still a hot-zone. Medevac has unknown ETA.” Full Metal swallowed hard, “Might be here in 15 mikes, might take 6 hours. Or more. Have to save some for later.”

“We’ve got plenty.” Sonny said as he squeezed his shoulder, “You’re in pain. A lot of it.”

“I’m nauseous enough already.” Full Metal shot back, “Can’t remember morphine helping any in that department.”

“No, but it’ll help with the pain. And that might ease nausea.” Trent quipped back as he placed the introducer against Full Metal’s skin, “Ready?”

He got a short nod in return and pushed the introducer down.

The operator on the ground let out a single expletive and gritted his teeth.

“Sorry about that…”

“We’re good.” Full Metal nodded and held his fist up for Trent to bump it.

All of the sudden their earpieces buzzed on, “Bravo team, this is Havoc. Looks like we’ve a group of 4, potentially 5, Tango’s headed your way in a pickup with a mounted machine gun.”

Jason replied. The guys got their orders and quickly followed through.

“Bravo 1, this is Bravo 5, I have eyes on the pickup. Should I engage? Out.”

 *          *          *

 By the time Trent, Sonny and Clay had carried Full Metal to safety, the building they were in was once again taking heavy fire.

This time, Full Metal hadn’t passed out due to pain from being jostled. Probably because the injection had been given the time to reach full effect.

“You think you’ll be okay down here by yourself?” Sonny asked as he helped Metal lean up against his backpack.

Full Metal nodded slightly, his eyes squeezed closed as he prayed for the pain to pass.

“Hey, Full Metal…”

“Yeah?”

“Are you going to be okay down here by yourself?”

He nodded a bit more, “Yeah. As soon as I stop feeling like I’m gonna pass out.”

“Do you want me to stay here with you?” Sonny asked, “Or Clay, or Trent…”

“No-NO…” Full Metal shook his head, “I’m a big boy. Can take care of myself.”

Trent raised an eyebrow, “Alright, big boy… Just radio if you change your mind.”

Full Metal raised his thumb in order to show that the message was received and understood.

[datleggy]

I’m autistic and one of the things I have trouble with is change. I’ve watched 911 since the third episode and now they have a second one? Idk. I’ve been seeing a lot of good things about it but I’m not sure if I want to watch it. Basically what I want to know is if it’s worth watching. Is it good? Are there any parallels between the new one and the Buck one? Who are the characters and what are they like? Will you start writing for this series instead of the other one? %

so, this got WAY longer than i thought it would, sorry!!! TL;DR is at the very very end!

tbh i didn’t wanna really give 911 lonestar a chance originally, i was lowkey annoyed bc it felt like they were like “oh u guys want buck and eddie, who are CLEARLY meant to be and have all this canon chemistry and relationship development to eventually get together??? lol NOPE but here’s a spinoff where u get ur white/latino gay ship :D”

which i do genuinely hope to god isn’t the case, like, i really need OG 911 to be like PSYCH here u go, some DIAZ-BUCKLEY fam. as a treat.

i did end up watching it bc curiosity and too many awesome gifsets finally got to me lol

and im only a couple of episodes in (haven’t had a chance to watch the 3rd ep bc of work and other things D: ) and so far i gotta say, i like the OG 911 calls that they get sent to more than 911 lonestars calls but again, im only 2 ep in, maybe they get more “woah thats crazy/hilarious/hearbreaking!” as the show goes on.

i honestly don’t see too many parallels between Buck and TK—the only thing i noticed where they’re pretty similar is how much they both enjoy easy physical contact. buck is very touchy feely and comfortable about showing affection/feelings and i feel like TK is the same regarding physical contact (with his dad at least)? but that’s about it.

for what it’s worth i do think the show is pretty entertaining and worth a watch!

my main reason for watching past the first episode is my enjoyment of the characters. i just think they’re all neat.

this is from a post i made when i first watched the show lol:

captain strand: good dad to all of his children

tk: hot gay messy boi

grace ryder: a fave, no nonsense beauty, judds better half

judd ryder: tragic big boi

captain blake: chaotic good w baby voice

marjan: wild feral messy gurl

mateo: if anybody’s mean to my SON im throwin hands bih

paul: again, if anybody’s mean to my SON im THROWIN hands

officer reyes: ready to dick tk down

here’s a more descriptive/longer summary of the characters if u wanna know more, if not skip down to the bolded sentence below lol:

owen strand is the captain (played by rob lowe) and to me he gives off chris traeger vibes (from parks and rec if u watched?) but with more depth. i like his character a lot, he’s a caring dad, seems like he knows what he’s doing, and like, c’mon, it’s rob lowe (i fell in love with him a million years ago when he played soda pop in the outsiders nipr;guebwuogrnofw)

tk is his son and a hot gay mess w some substance abuse issues (tho a lot has happened to him in only 2 ep i really don’t know how to feel about him entirely, bc besides stuff happening TO him, i don’t feel like he’s reacted in a way that shows much of his character?) idk maybe it’s just me. but he is a certified cutie so. lol

grace ryder, she’s smart (one of the only characters with more than ONE brain cell lmao) and gorgeous and an emergency 911 operator. she’s very supportive of her husband and what he’s going thru (which is A LOT), she herself has been thru a lot bc of the big incident at the beginning of the series and is still somehow held strong in spite of it all, she’s a personal fave of mine.

judd ryder is kind of a dick at first but i think its very understandable given the hell he’s been thru, im actually surprised at the amount that i like him. he’s very raw and vulnerable but has this “don’t worry im fine, back up” attitude that i loooove. 

captain blake is the captain for EMTs, she’s got this soft teeny baby voice that contradicts so hard with her give no fucks ima do what i need to to find my missing sister actions irwughqwgoriegjf i like. she’s caring and does goes out of  her way for the little guy.

marjan has ZERO chill but in a good way, i can already absolutely see her getting into trouble by doing some crazy impulsive thing on a call in order to rescue someone—-TBH she actually reminds me a lot of Buck from OG 911 in that way. like yea she’s reckless and impulsive but u can tell its bc she CARES and this firefighting thing is what she’s meant to do. i really like her.

mateo—-OH MAN. he’s 10000000% my favorite. it hurts me everytime he’s on screen, bc he’s such a sweet and HARD WORKING man and he deserves to be a firefighter and do what he wants/has been waiting for for so long, im so HAPPY captain strand gives him a chance. i think he might have some learning disability or maybe he grew up in a household where maybe his family was too busy or didn’t care to check up on how he was doing in school and they neglected to see how much he was struggling—this is all just pure speculation from the fact that on the show he tells captain strand during the interview that he’s always passed the physical exam to be a firefighter but keeps failing the written part :( i love my son.

paul is a trans firefighter who’s mainly known for his crazy good observational skills in the field—there’s an ep—ep 2?—that shows off his talent but like, i found it unintentional funny bc the way they did it was in a scene that honestly truly felt to me like a scene I MYSELF would write in a fanfiction if i wanted to show off a cool skill the character has but was also too lazy to make it look good???? lmaoooo im not trying to be mean but like, if u do watch it, its the 2nd ep i believe, the “office meeting” scene. other than that tho there’s only been a few scenes with paul in it (my personal fave being the skin care routine scene lol) but i look forward to more scenes of my son being a lil sherlock holmes :)

officer reyes is tk’s potential new mans. he seems like a good cop from what little ive seen of him doing police work. so, i saw a post someone made basically saying how ugly are the men in texas that officer reyes is out here thirsting over tk so HARD—and not to be rude, but he really is!!!! reyes is a goodlookin guy, so idk what’s up with that, maybe he likes messy bois? bc same.

p.s. im not sure how to feel about reyes and tk together yet bc it doesn’t really seem as if they have too much chemistry. hopefully that changes? i do kinda like that they haven’t started off their potential relationship on the best of foots, bc i love drama, an indisputable fact.

ONTO THE FINAL QUESTION!

OG 911 will always be my first love and i just don’t see this changing anytime soon. buddie will always be the #1 ship in my heart! and i have about a gazillion awesome prompts i need to work on so me switching over to 911 lonestar isn’t gonna happen. i love OG 911 way too much iuqhur4ogfoie3jwnwjinioj

tho i may occasionally—per the request of prompts i’ve gotten in the last week or so–take a couple of the characters from 911 lonestar and put them in a 911 fic as a crossover? we’ll see.

this ended up soooo long oruhibgruoeqwp i hope some of it helped tho?

tl;dt: 911 lonestar seems fun and the characters are interesting enough to keep me entertained so i say give it a chance  :)

[skywalkex]

My thoughts on The Last Jedi

I saw the movie last night. I slept on it but there’s still so much I need to process. Everything that happened was not what I expected. I really admire Rian Johnson’s guts to took everything to the next level. That being said, I think this movie also has some flaws.

TLJ SPOILERS under the cut.

[EDIT: after seeing the movie a second time and processing it also with the help of the Internet, I can say I changed my mind on A LOT of things. Take what I wrote here only as first impressions. As Jane Austen taught us, first impressions are often wrong *winks hoping you get the Pride and Prejudice reference*]

I’ll try to go through every storyline so as not to ramble inconsistently.

I. Poe and Holdo (+ Leia), aka the “run from the First Order fleet” storyline 

It’s basically the main thread from which the movie develops. I didn’t particularly like Holdo’s character but in the end we’re supposed to root for Poe, right...? And my goodness, Poe. I still haven’t decided if I think that Johnson went a little too far with him or not. It seemed to me that the Poe in TFA was less of a rebel-inside-the-Rebellion but more of a (mostly) disciplined soldier. In TLJ he’s always rebelling or fighting against something and getting slapped in the face or shot in the stomach for insubordination. Maybe I’d have preferred a somewhat calmer but smarter Poe?

(Also, I’ve read that some people felt something between Poe and Rey when they met... I want to ask these people what they smoke/drank before entering the cinema because that felt like regular Poe to me. He’s had more sexual tension with Finn or even Holdo. Like, okay, Poe has sexual tension with everyone and everything so that’s why they may have misinterpreted lol.)

II. Finn, Rose, BB8 (+ DJ I’m not sure they ever said his name in the movie tho?, Phasma), aka Canto Bight

Was their storyline necessary? No. Was it particularly well written? Meh. Did I like it? YES.

Finn is one of my favorite characters. I wish he and Poe had more screentime and things to do together, but even like this I’m not really complaining. I loved Canto Bight. It was a breath of fresh air to see a new and interesting place in the galaxy. And the whole social message of it and DJ was very important. I loved the fathiers and even the stable boys (I didn’t catch the force pull people are talking about, need to rewatch). The real MVP here was BB8 though. However, some of the BB8 jokes felt a little too forced sometimes, just like with other characters (see: Hux).

I quite like the fact that nothing in this storyline went as we expected. Did they disable the tracker and save everyone? No. Did DJ pull a Han in the end and go back to save them? No. Was Phasma useful and/or important to the plot? No. Did Finn sacrifice himself for everyone like it was the right thing to do? No. That’s why I said that Johnson has the guts. (I never really liked Phasma anyway, hope she’s not coming back).

That Finnrose kiss felt a bit out of nowhere if you ask me...

III. Luke, aka the Return of the King

Luke was EVERYTHING. If I were able to cry in public (I couldn’t due to social anxiety in a crowded theater) I would have bawled my eyes out and not be able to hear a thing under the sound of my loud weeps. Thankfully I didn’t cry but just sat there wide-mouthed the whole time. Look, Luke was always my favorite. I’ve always liked him more than Han, more than Leia, more than anyone. And I wasn’t ready for old Luke and what this move did with him.

I think Johnson gave him the perfect farewell (though I’m 99.9999% sure he will be back in Episode IX as force ghost especially now that they have to write out Leia), BUT how Johnson handled the Luke and Kylo backstory, aka the tent scene, wasn’t 100% to my liking and in Luke’s character, in my opinion. It felt a bit forced.

Anyway, honorable mention to Luke meeting R2-D2 and C3PO again, AND HIS FAREWELL TO LEIA. That was really something. And I can’t not mention Luke vs. Kylo. That was amazing cinematography and something that will go down in history. Tbh, when Luke appeared out of nowhere in the rebel base and later wasn’t hurt by the fire I thought “that’s his force ghost, Luke is already dead”. But I was pleased to see that it was a bit different, though I was on the right track.

IV. Snoke and Hux, aka underwhelming bad guys

Not much to say here, just that I expected a bit more from Snoke. Who was he? How did he become so powerful? Did he just die like that? Didn’t he have more underlings beside the Praetorian Guard? Will we ever know?

And Hux... Oh, Hux. I wish they didn’t treat him like a comedic joke most of the time in TLJ. I liked his rivalry with Kylo in TFA but now everything’s changed. I hope J.J. brings back a bit of the old balance between them in IX.

V. Rey and Kylo, aka the Rosings Park chapters in Pride and Prejudice

I don’t think I can talk about these two separately. I have no words to describe how I loved their interactions and journey in this movie. The force connection was totally unexpected for me (I thought it would never come true outside fanfiction lol) and SO fascinating. They’re my favorite bits along with Luke.

As for Rey, I only wish she had spent a little more time with Luke just because I love them together. Also that she received more training and teachings on the Force and the history of Jedi. I feel like we, as audience, also needed that. I just wanted to know more about Jedi lore because it really fascinates me. Those books will hopefully be relevant in Episode IX.

I loved how things seemed to point to a redemption for Kylo in this movie but then went the opposite way. I’m sure the redemption will happen in IX, but I have no idea how, and if Kylo will survive it.

Okay, I’d lie if I said that I wasn’t disappointed with Rey’s parentage at first. BUT then i realized that this is the most important message in TLJ: the Force is everywhere and in everyone, not just in “royal” lineages like the Skywalkers. Even a stable boy or the daughter of two drunken scavengers can become the most powerful Force users in the galaxy. And now I love it. (Btw, it’s always been like that if you think about it, just look at Anakin.)

That “proposal” scene really felt like out of P&P, didn’t it? I was amazed at the amount of Reylo innuendos in this movie. Blessed be Rian Johnson. I don’t know yet if it’s going anywhere in a romantic sense, but you know I wouldn’t mind if it does.

To sum up:

Favorite scenes: Luke vs. Kylo, Luke and the two suns, every Force connection scene, the throne room, Luke and Leia, the escape with the fathiers, Yoda

Less favorite scenes: basically every scene with Holdo or Phasma, especially Finn and Rose’s capture (because come on, we all knew they weren’t gonna be executed and every time they cut to them I was like “NONONONO show me the throne room! I want to see my Reylo!”)

[marybeatriceofmodena]

chance may crown me - a story for the 2017 reylo fanfiction anthology: celebrate the waking

chapter I (AO3/Tumblr) | chapter II (AO3/Tumblr) | chapter III (AO3/Tumblr) | chapter IV (AO3/Tumblr) | chapter V (AO3/Tumblr) | chapter VI (AO3/Tumblr) | chapter VII (AO3/Tumblr) | chapter VIII (AO3/Tumblr)

Thanks to everyone who took the time to leave a comment on AO3. This will be my last Reylo fic for an indeterminate amount of time. 

It didn’t take long before Queen Kusumina’s troops made their way to the throne room, meeting Rey, Ben and Leia. Upon discovering King Prana was dead, along with one of their generals, the First Order troops were in chaos, not knowing who to turn to.

The Naboo military admitted their complicity with the First Order, even confirming that General Hux’s murder had been staged in order to accuse the Royal Alderaanian family of the deed. Along with the Queen’s escape from certain death, it didn’t take much more to prove the First Order’s ill intentions.

It left as quickly and as quietly as it could from Naboo, and rumor had it that its members present on Naboo were heading towards the Outer Rim, sending word to their allies as well. What would be their next move was uncertain: but such worries were the Galactic Senate’s business.

Whether there would be war again or not, or rather, whether the First Order would go out for revenge or be crippled permanently, no one could tell.

For those who knew who had been truly pulling the strings all those years, they could only hope the organization would fall apart on its own. Snoke had been defeated, but his spirit, while weakened, wasn’t dead, and would find a way to come back. They could only hope it wouldn’t be for a long time.

It had been a week since the First Order had fled from Naboo. There was still a lot of work to be done, and guards who couldn’t be trusted anymore had to be replaced. There was a pressing need… which meant taking more unorthodox measures.

It wasn’t every day a scavenger from Theed’s undercity became part of the Queen’s personal guard. But Rey had to admit Finn looked very handsome in his uniform.

It was a way of rewarding him for saving the Queen’s life. However, Rey wondered if there weren’t more personal interests involved. Finn was the one guard Rose requested at her side at all times. Judging by how they often stood a bit too close to each other at times, or the stolen glances when they thought no one was watching, Rey knew that if a relationship would come to form between them (if it already wasn’t the case), it wouldn’t stay a secret for very long.

For Finn, Rey only wished the best. And after all those years in misery, he got what he truly deserved.

As for her… she had no idea what would happen.

Finn was busy with his new duties. Rey had been granted a room in the palace, but she knew very well it was temporary. While Finn was away, Ben was the only one who kept her company during those solitary days. But there was still something different, almost melancholic about that change: before the events of the last week, Rey had never been separated from Finn, or at least only for a few hours.

Now, it felt as if he was moving onto a new step in his life: one where she would still be important, but not as a centerpiece anymore. Somehow, it felt like losing her parents again, and without Ben’s presence, it would have been unbearable.

Ben could be unbearable too: but he was company. Good company. Though he didn’t need to know that.

They had common interests in tech, though Rey’s knowledge was practical while Ben’s was theoretical. He also loved to go on long rants about anything that would come across them in the walks they’d take together. He’d do it mostly to amaze her, showing off how incredibly intelligent he was. Rey pretended not to be impressed: though deep down, she was an avid learner.

And - yet another thing he didn’t need to know - he was a good teacher.

“So who trained you?” Ben asked, one day. Rey stared at him in surprise.

“What do you mean, trained me?”

“Your Jedi training. Though I suppose it wasn’t called that.”

Rey blinked, her mouth half-open. Of course, she had trained with a lightsaber, and had been forced to do boring meditation exercises thanks to Maz. But to think that she had potential as a Jedi…

“Are you going to contact your uncle again?” asked Rey. “Continue your training?”

Ben scowled and shrugged. “I’m not going back to him,” he grumbled. “I’ve had enough masters to last me a lifetime. Best way to learn is to keep on searching for old lore. And I’ll try to avoid the ones written by stuffy old masters. Reminds me of one time I fell across a holocron from a Master who thought all Jedi should shave their heads. He said his padawan was far too attached to his. I had to threaten Uncle Luke that I would destroy the holocron if he forced me to shave my hair. Thankfully, I didn’t have to.”

Rey burst in laughter, while Ben had another one of his crooked grins. She liked them. In those moments, he looked like a little boy.

“You know,” Ben added, “you have a lot of raw potential. You need a teacher.”

“Who?” Rey asked, tilting her head. “You?”

“Of course,” he said, puffing his chest, and Rey rolled her eyes. But Ben twisted his mouth, pouting slightly. “Well, I still have a lot to learn myself.”

“Good,” Rey replied. “That means I won’t hear you brag all the time about how smart you are.”

Ben grumbled something, while Rey laughed again, nudging him gently on the shoulder. He then grabbed her hand, locking hers into his.

“So when do we start?” Rey asked.

Whatever cheerfulness was on Ben’s face quickly faded away. “I’m-- not supposed to tell you…”

“What?” Rey interjected. “What’s going on?”

Ben twisted his mouth, staring at the ground. Rey grew frustrated. If there was one thing she hated, it was being left in the dark.

“Ben, tell me. I have a right to know.”

Ben gulped. “They’re-- they’re deciding what to do with you.”

“What? Who?”

“The Queen. My mother. And other close advisors. You see… with your lineage… it’s big business. Snoke knew who you were. He could have given that information to other high-ranked people in the First Order. Ill-intentioned people could discover your identity. Not just on the First Order’s side, but the New Republic’s side too. And there are people there who are out for Imperial blood.”

The world starting spinning around Rey. She could hide, and no one would ever know what had become of her. She could manage on her own. She always did, and high-ranked people deciding of her fate had no power over her. It wasn’t like they could…

...exile her.

Rey knew all too well what had happened to Imperial leaders, when they hadn’t been able to run away to the Unknown Regions-- or had been executed.

“This isn’t fair!” she shouted. “I did nothing wrong. I didn’t choose my family.”

Ben chuckled mirthlessly. “Obviously.”

Rey glared at him. “Your parents and your uncle are war heroes. Don’t patronize me.”

Ben turned away, contemplating Theed unfurling under the balcony where they were standing. “Remember when we were looking at all the Monarchs’ silk portraits? You were wondering why I was staring at Queen Amidala’s.” He took a deep breath. “She was my grandmother.”

“What?” Rey replied in disbelief.

“She died the day my mother and my uncle were born. She had fallen in love with a Jedi Knight, Anakin Skywalker. They got married, and they kept it all secret.  Thing is, he wasn’t an ordinary Jedi. His Masters believed he was the Chosen One, and that he was destined to destroy the Sith for good. He died during Order 66. At least, that’s the official story.”

“But Luke Skywalker destroyed the Sith, right? At least, that’s what the legends say.”

Ben smiled, but there was no joy. “You’ll learn that legends tend to make the events a lot more pleasant than they truly are. Anakin Skywalker didn’t die during Order 66. He actually led the Clone troopers into the Jedi Temple. He then became known as Darth Vader.”

Rey’s throat tightened. She found herself at a loss for words. She wanted to comfort Ben, express some sympathy-- but she realized now that it wasn’t her forte. Her pain was something she always pushed back, bottled up, in order to focus on the positive sides of her life when she wasn’t forced to focus on survival.

“It’s-- it’s not your fault,” Rey attempted. “You’re not responsible for what happened fifty years ago from now--”

“Well, some people will disagree with you,” Ben cut her. “If the truth came out, like it nearly did if Snoke had got his way, my mother would be forced to abdicate. She’d lose all credibility. They wouldn’t care, even after she devoted her entire life fighting against the Empire and building the New Republic. That’s why I infiltrated the First Order. I didn’t care what happened to me. My mother once said she’d burn down the entire galaxy just to prove that she was right. I guess we’re not that different.”

Rey moved away, uncomfortable. “Thankfully, I’m not very good at it,” Ben continued, in an attempt to lighten up the mood. “I always end up doing something stupid.”

“No! You’re not stupid, you’re--” Rey hesitated, unsure if honesty would be the right option. But Ben staring at her encouraged her to continue. “You’re reckless. But you’re like that because you care.”

A shy smile drew itself on Ben’s lips. At that moment, Rey couldn’t resist hugging him tightly. He responded by patting her back, awkward, as if he still wasn’t use to that kind of contact. But it didn’t take long before he hugged her back, his hold gentle yet firm.

“I think I have an idea.”

Rey shot her head up. “What?”

“I was planning to leave to Corellia once all this would be over. See my father. I haven’t seen him in years. I don’t want to risk anyone trying to hold me back with protocol or Jedi training or whatever they’ll have in store for me, so I was going to leave in secret.”

“So… you’re giving up on becoming a Jedi Knight? And what about your mother?”

Ben sighed. “I’m-- I’m scared. I don’t want to be forced to go back to the Alderaanian court. And I need time. You know… I never wanted to be a prince, or a Jedi. I wanted to be a pilot and a smuggler. Like my father.”

Ben then cleared his throat, shifting awkwardly. “So… before someone else makes the decision for you, I was thinking… I mean, if you want, and you can say no, I mean, I’d love to if you said yes, but you don’t have to--”

“You want me to run away with you.”

Ben froze, afraid of what Rey’s reaction might be next. She picked up both his hands. “I-- I don’t know if leaving Naboo will be easy, or a good idea,” she continued. “I’ve been here my entire life.”

He crossed his arms. “You only remember Theed. You haven’t seen that much.”

“And I guess I’ll have to hear you brag about how well you know every single planet in the galaxy,” Rey sighed. “But… I do want to see it. Other worlds, I mean. I’d like that. But... ” Her throat tightened. “I need to say goodbye to someone. Please. I can’t just leave like that.”

Ben frowned, but his features softened as he realized of whom Rey was speaking. He nodded. “Of course.”

Ben had left a note for his mother: she’d see it only in the morning. She would know where he went: and by the time he’d be gone, it would be too late to hold him back.

It wasn’t permanent, but he, as well as Rey, needed time away from the greater scheme of things, in anonymity.

That night, on the landing pad, there were only three people and a BB unit, three of whom would fly away to Corellia, on the used ship Ben had got the same day.

Finn was the only one aware of their escape. Elopement.

Despite Ben’s fears, it wasn’t difficult for Rey to convince Finn to keep it all secret. Nevertheless, he was worried.

“You don’t have to go,” Finn said. “It doesn’t have to be like this. I can find a way--”

“I know you would,” Rey replied, attempting to keep her voice clear despite her throat tightening. “And I know Rose would, too. But in the end, you’re not the ones making the final decision. So… I guess you could say I’m breaking the cycle.”

Finn attempted to smile. “Yeah. You’ve had enough crazy to last you a lifetime. But anyway, be careful.”

Rey titled her head with an amused smile. “I’m always careful, you know that. And BB-8 will protect me.”

BB-8 beeped in approval, brandishing his welding torch with pride.

“And as for you…” Finn added, turning towards Ben. “If you let something happen to Rey, or if you’re the one hurting her, I swear, I--”

“Yes, I know,” Ben replied, rolling his eyes. “You’ll hunt me down and kill me. Of course. You know, it’ll take more than a blaster to stop me, kid.”

“I have a vibrosword.”

Ben gulped. “Okay.”

Finn nodded with a smirk, before turning again to Rey. He cleared his throat, but like Rey, he was unable to hold back the tears in his eyes.

They hugged each other tightly, Rey burying her face in Finn’s shoulder, as she always did.

“When you’re off duty, you’ll come and see me, right?” asked Rey.

“Of course. I’ll come every chance I get.”

“And-- could you… actually, do Ben a favor. Do it for me. Tell Leia I’ll watch over Ben. And that we just need some time away. Promise me?”

“I will.”

Without further ado, Rey pulled herself out of Finn’s arms, and followed Ben into the ship, BB-8 right behind her, but not without one last glance behind, towards Finn, and towards Theed.

Leaving was now becoming very real, and Rey was torn between her thirst for exploring the rest of the galaxy and her fright at the thought she was leaving Naboo, after staying all those years, hoping for her family to come back.

Now, she was running away.

She closed the airlock behind her, heading towards the cockpit, where Ben was waiting for her.

When she entered, Ben turned towards her, with another of his shy half-smiles in an attempt to reassure her. With his fingers fiddling all over the controls, his giddiness was obvious. Despite everything, Rey couldn’t help but smile.

“I’ll have to learn how to pilot too,” she said.

“I’ll teach you.”

“Good. Then I’ll have to become better than you.”

He smirked in amusement. “Well, maybe not piloting. But perhaps a better Force user than me. It comes more easily to you.”

“So… a Jedi?”

“Not a Jedi.” He remained silent for a few seconds. “Maybe something else.”

“What, not a Sith?”

“No, of course not. Though, you would make a wonderful Empress.”

Rey glared at Ben. “Don’t--”

“I was joking. However, milady, if you change your mind, I’m at your service.” He bowed his head, but Rey softly elbowed him, half-annoyed, half-smiling.

“So, if we’re not Jedi, or Sith, what are we, then?”

Ben remained pensive. “We’ll have to figure that out. We have time.”Do you want to be the one plotting the course?” he asked, pointing to the navicomputer. “Corellia’s right there.”

Rey nodded, swallowing back any nervousness as she sealed her fate, leaving Naboo behind her-- for now.

For the first time, she didn’t know what would be awaiting her: but now, there was a thrill to it rather than fright.

It was a new beginning, for both of them. And this time, perhaps they would be able to leave the ghosts of the past behind for good.