#iwafy

[itsmewillful]

I will Always Find You

Main Masterlist

Character Masterlist:

(Vox x fem!reader)

Word Count: 5782 (i got too carried away)

Outline: You, the wife of the infamous media overlord Vox, falls from Heaven and you find yourself in a chaotic new world. You meet the Hazbin Hotel crew, but most of all, you met him. Your long lost love.

Warning(s): Canon typical violence, language, etcetera.

A/N: Heyy guys, I totally was not gone for an entire year. . .but, I'm done with High School now so I will probably start posting a little bit more often. . .*no promises though. my memory is absolute garbage*

Also, why am I obsessed with a TV?

Story below the cut:

Heaven.

The place all virtuous and 'perfect' people ascend to after living the life every good person is meant.

You don't even know how you got here. You always thought that you would go to Hell. (Not to put it lightly) Perhaps it was because you were widowed at a rather young age. Perhaps it was because you were murdered by your late husband's arch rival. Or maybe, it was a bit of all.

Your life on earth wasn't bad per se. In fact, you had a very happy life. You got married at the fruitful age of 20, to your best friend, and lived in a very comfortable home. Your husband, Vincent Holland, was a big-time news reporter in your hometown.

But, why was it in Heaven that almost all your memories regarding Vincent were blurry? As if someone with significant power was preventing you from reminiscing on your past life?

You could barely remember his face; his award winning smile. His sapphire blue eyes, and his dark hair.

You hated this.

You couldn't even remember how long ago you died.

Hell, you couldn't even remember how you died. Just that you were murdered one day and your body was left to rot in a random alley.

A hand waving in front of your face interrupted your sad train of thoughts, and your attention immediately shifted back to your friend. Or acquaintance, you weren't exactly sure where your friendship status lay.

"You alright there, partner?"

You sighed slowly and nodded your head in affirmation. You weren't sure if you were doing it to convince them that you were okay, or yourself.

"I'm alright, Kai, just a bit tired ," you mumbled pathetically. Kai was a very beautiful shark-like angel. You met them some time ago and instantly clicked with one another. But, Kai was one of those people that had a tendency of gossiping with their girlfriend Molly. And you were never comfortable sharing anything beyond your life in Heaven.

Which was a pity because you were sure if you shared it, you wouldn't feel so fucking stressed out.

The shark angel let out a small laugh and gently patted your head.

"Sure, sure. Whatever you say m'lady. You know if there's anything bothering you, you could always talk to me or Molly, right?"

You again nodded your head, even though you probably would never take up the offer.

"Hey you guys! How are you both doing?"

Speak of the devil and he shalt appear.

"Hey Molly! I see you're finally off of work?"

"Yup! And I brought a treat for you both!" Molly said in a sing-song tone of voice. Kai smiled with a nearly evil-like grin and made grabby hands at their girlfriend.

"Gimme, I can smell the baked goods!"

You chuckled at Kai's antics and stood up from the chair you were sitting in. Kai raised a brow at you and you motioned with your hand that you were going to get another drink. You picked up your now empty whisky bottle and began to head over to the bar where you and Kai find yourselves frequently whenever you both have had a long day at work.

The bartender, Mr Smiles (as Molly so lovingly named him) greeted you with a very drunken smirk when you arrived at your favourite destination.

"Hello there, Mrs. Holland. To what do I owe the pleasure?"

You rolled your eyes and sat down on one of the barstools, placing your cup down and sliding it over to the bartender.

"Another, please." you said simply. Mr. Smiles blinked at you before grabbing your cup and pouring more of the golden liquid into it.

"The 'Another' for the lady." he said cheekily, to which you giggled. You snatched the cup up from the table and practically downed the strong liquid and forced back a gag when it burned your throat. The bartender chuckled at your silliness and leaned over the bar so you could hear each other better over the loud chatter of the Cloud Nine bar. (You and Kai always found the name of the bar to be hilarious)

"So, you never drink this much unless you have something to spill. Need to talk about something sweetheart?" he asked with a patient tone of voice.

You sighed dramatically and leaned back against your chair, deep in thought.

"I just. . ." you trailed off in thought before sighing again in annoyance at your capability of explaining your biggest problem.

"You just?" he tried to urge you to continue, but was rudely interrupted when a flock of angels came bursting into the room.

"His Holiness, Archangel Michael needs to discuss important matters in Town Square. Everyone present is required to make an audience immediately."

Murmurs began to fill the room in confusion of the sudden announcement. You raised your brow at the bartender, quietly asking him if he knew what all the commotion was about. He shrugged before continuing on with putting the remaining glasses away.

"Hey, partner, we need to head out to Town Square." Kai said, putting a webbed hand onto your shoulder. You nodded and stood up, following close behind your two buddies. Molly, like always, had a small hop to her step as if she was always happy and excited about things. Her partner smiled at her giddiness and soon began to also skip along with her.

Oh, how much you missed being able to have someone to be close with. And once again, your thoughts began to turn back to your late husband, Vincent.

You missed him so much.

And you were fully aware that your beloved Vincent was in Hell. The place you were also sure to go to when you kicked the bucket. But alas, here you are, in the city of silver and gold.

You stopped abruptly when you reached Town Square and noticed how big of a crowd was already there. Thousands of angels and souls alike, all stood cramped up around a huge balcony that belonged to Archangel Palace.

The chatter began to quiet down when the all-loved Archangel Michael stepped up to the balcony and waved to the crowd to silence their speech.

Kai bent over to you and whispered about how interesting things were going to get. You didn't respond, but instead gasped when a photo got projected onto the side of one of the Palace's huge spires. It was a really bloody scene: demonic-like creatures were sprawled all over the ground, torn to shreds from what you could tell. What made you feel faint, however, was the carcuses of angels. What the fuck were angels doing in Hell?

It seemed that a lot of other people were questioning the same exact thing, and Michael, once again announced order from the crowd and the only sound remaining were the hushed whispers.

"It has come to my knowledge that a secret organisation has been founded without my permission. Adam, the first man, and Sera, have been discovered sending down angels every year to kill them." He stopped mid explanation and waved his hand over to an angel that stood close to him. A scroll was placed into Michael's hands, and he unscrolled it and began to read whatever was written onto it.

"According to the words of Sera: Hell has become too overpopulated, and a risk of war could arise. Exterminations have been a necessity, and is, therefore required to keep balance between Good, and Evil." Michael immediately crumpled up the scroll, and threw it back at the poor angel that was beside him to catch.

"This is all tyranny, of course. Me and the Council did not agree to such lunacy, which is why, we are going to have a public vote as to whether or not Sera should be ex-communicated from Heaven."

A loud gasp came from the crowd.

Especially from Molly, who also seemed to begin to tear up.

"That means she'll be thrown to Hell!" she choked back a sob in surprise. Kai patted their girlfriends back to try and sooth her large and soft heart.

You, however, were enraged from the idea of angels going down and killing people. Your beloved Vincent was down there. What if he was killed?!

And like always, your spiral of thoughts was interrupted when Michael began to speak again.

"Just to be absolutely clear, this is never to be discussed with anyone ever again. After the vote is casted, anyone caught discussing this topic will immediately be casted from Paradise, and into the pits of Hell for treachery. I cannot be clear enough."

Murmurs filled the Square as everyone agreed to Michael's proposal.

"Great! Well, everyone better head off to vote now! Have a great day everyone." And like that, he vanished in a cloud of golden smoke.

You didn't realise your jaw was hanging open until Kai mentioned that you looked like a venus-fly trap waiting for a bug to land in your mouth. You clamped it shut instantly and glared at them.

"Chill! It was just supposed to be a joke!" They huffed in faux offence. Molly giggled at her partner's antics, and gently rubbed her fingers in between Kai's fins that decorated their body.

"Calm down, love. We need to head to a voting booth so we can cast votes. I know what I'm voting for."

"Yeah, I can't believe such a thing was happening behind our backs! Who knows how long it has been going on?"

Molly sighed and rubbed her fuzzy face for comfort.

"I don't know, but I hope it wasn't for too long. I believe some of my family is down there."

"Yikes, that's tough. I'm sorry for that." Kai said with sympathy laced in their voice.

You blinked back tears that were forming in your eyes. You would not cry over the possibility that your Vincent was double-dead.

You were strong.

+++

You sighed heavily when you arrived at your small apartment later that evening.

"What a rotten day," you mumbled to yourself. As if on command, your pet land-shark Vark came running into the foyer. You smiled instantly and picked up the little creature and began to pet him between his eyes.

You and Vincent loved sharks. It was a shared passion you both had that made you best friends instantly. When you first got married, you both always joked of getting a shark and naming it Vark.

Well, you had the shark, just not Vincent.

You were thinking about him again, and it was making you feel bad once more.

Why couldn't you remember some things? Who or what was making you forget?

You placed Vark back onto the ground, who of course, whined with the lack of affection from your part. You stepped over the land-shark and headed over to your balcony, that had a perfect view of the Embassy of Heaven. The place you go to whenever you have questions regarding the after-life and anything else.

Maybe there you would find answers.

With a new destination in mind, you grabbed Vark's leash and hooked him up to it. Vark began to wag his tail (well, his fin) in excitement about where you would be taking him. You smiled again at your pet's adorable-ness and began to head back outside once more.

The streets of Heaven were very peaceful. Just about no soul was out and about. It made sense since it was rather late. Around eleven o'clock actually.

Soon, the golden pillars of the Embassy came into view, and you let out a sigh when you realised it was still open. You approached the heavy double doors and swallowed back a scream when they opened up automatically. Vark found it hilarious however, when you just about died a second time from a mini heart attack.

You huffed at your shark and headed inside the golden-themed building and found that it was practically empty. I mean-duh it was empty, it was basically in the middle of the night.

A Cherub, from the looks of it, approached you and gave you a rather judgmental look over.

"Honey, I'm sorry to say this but no pets are allowed." the Cherub said with an irritating tone of voice.

You stared at the flying goat-creature and rolled your eyes.

"Vark, is a service pet. I am afraid you can't throw him out." you lied with a fake smile. One thing that Vincent taught you to do well, was fake things. You were especially good at putting on a fake show. One of the things that, once again, surprised you that Heaven looked over.

Wasn't lying a big sin?

The Cherub interrupted your thoughts when she cleared her throat rather obnoxiously.

"Alright honey. Whatever you say. To what do I owe the pleasure of assisting you with this evening?"

"Oh, well. . .I am not so sure how to explain it." you answered truthfully; slightly cringing at your lack of effort of just telling her.

The Cherub pulled out a clipboard from thin air you assumed (since she most certainly wasn't holding one earlier) and began to scribble something onto it.

"Well, Mr. Heart will be able to assist you with whatever, 'complicated' issue you have got going on." She handed you a piece of paper that had practically illegible handwriting on it, and pointed to a corridor that led to a couple of office rooms.

"Hope you find what you need, honey. Good night." and like that, she sauntered off to what you assumed to be her office. What a weird person, you thought with a click of your tongue.

You began your tread to Mr. Heart's office, and stopped when you reached the door. You lifted your hand to knock but stopped when the door was flung open and a rather energetic angel stepped out of the room.

"Hey there! You must be one of the 'poor souls' Chili sent to me! Come on in!" he moved aside and held a hand out for you to shake, to which he practically tore off yours when he shook it rather rigorously.

"The name is Heart! What's yours m'lady?"

You mumbled your name back and he let out a very loud laugh.

"Why, Mrs. Holland! Quite the pleasure to be meeting you!" 

You nodded your head and held back a gasp when he pulled you by the hand into the office.

"So, tell me what has troubled you enough to venture here so late in the night?"

You opened your mouth to begin speaking, but clamped it down when you couldn't find the right words to say. Damn it, you were nervous. You couldn't, however, pinpoint if it was from the very very close proximity of the Angel, or the lack of knowledge of how to explain your memories being jumbled up.

You could begin by telling the angel to take a few hundred steps back.

"Sorry, but um, could you step back a bit?" You asked with a shaky breath. The Angel smiled with pearly white teeth, but didn't seem to move an inch.

"I can't hear you clearly if I am too far back. It is best if I stay here." He said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. (or Heaven)

You nodded, even though you doubt that was the truth. You mentally noted to never come back here again once you're down getting some answers.

"So, I have a question." You began.

"Everyone that comes here has questions. But I can't exactly be sure that your question is legal to answer or not."

Your eyes widened in curiosity. Some questions could be illegal to ask? Flashbacks from today's event clouded your thoughts, but you immediately shook them away. A traitor is how you would be viewed if you discussed with anyone about today. And you would be quite foolish to bring it up with an official member of the Council.

"So, you were saying, Mrs. Holland?"

"Why am I not able to remember some things about my life on Earth?" You may as well pull off the bandage and stop dancing around the bush in fear of being judged. Your worries worsened when the Angel's eyes seemed to darken a little.

"Whatever do you mean, darling? What memories?"

"That is the whole point! I know that I can't remember some things! I just don't know what." frustration was very clear in your voice at this point.

Mr. Heart laughed wholeheartedly as if your 'situation' was the funniest thing anyone has ever told him.

"Well my dear, no need to get all fierce with me! I only want to assist you. And it seems that you are treading on very dangerous waters. I would watch out if I were you."

You swear your eyes became fire. How dare he act as if your troubles were something scandalous! Vark began to lick your leg as an attempt to calm you down, which worked for a moment until the 'ever lovable' Mr. Heart reached a hand out and began to rub your shoulders as if he had any right to touch you.

Vark, being the wonderful pet he is, noticed this and bit his leg. The angel howled in pain and kicked your beloved baby and he began to wail in pain. At this point, all you saw was red as you lunged onto the man and began to beat him up with what some people would call a 'mother's fiery.'

Some raised voices from outside of the office eventually joined the chaos of the room, and you were dragged off the very-much battered up Mr. Heart. Well, Mr. Heartless to you.

"Mrs. Holland! How dare you strike a Seraphim! That is considered treachery to the Hierarchy of the Council!" the same Cherub from earlier screeched at you in a high-pitched tone.

"Well I'll be damned! He touched me without consent and kicked my pet! I was defending myself-"

"You lie! One sin after another! How could you!?" you felt yourself being picked up from two service angels, and being dragged to another room, your shark following you right behind.

"Where are you taking me?" You shouted, attempting to pull off the two angels that were holding you roughly.

"We're not taking you anywhere. You are going to be sent somewhere." the Cherub said with a malicious tone of voice. You bit back a sob when the words processed in your head.

They were going to send you to Hell

You eventually approached a door that read 'Employees Only' and met a room that had an arch that took up the entire floor.

The portal to Hell. The place they were going to toss you into for something utterly stupid. How hypocritical of them. Heaven, the place of love and peace? My ass!

The Cherub flew over to a panel on the side of the wall, and loud sirens were heard throughout the room. Hell, you bet the entire 'cloud kingdom' could hear the loud blaring the room was making.

A red coloured portal began to appear on the ground within the structure of the arch. You gulped and felt tears begin to dwell in your eyes.

This was it.

Good-bye Heaven. Good-bye Kai and Molly.

You could hear Vark wailing from the loud noises and you attempted at twisting around to look at him. Your last attempt at begging for your shark's mercy was cut off when you were tossed into the portal.

You fell for a moment.

Then everything went dark.

+++

What awoke you from your 'dreamless sleep' was the feeling of something wet being dragged across your face. You moaned in pain when everything came crashing down on you. Literally.

Your back hurts, your head hurts, hell, even your face hurts.

You opened your eyes and noticed your beloved land-shark was on top of you, licking your face. You didn't feel anything but pure joy at that moment when you realised your shark wasn't going to be left all alone up in Heaven.

"My baby! I thought I wouldn't see you again!" you cried aloud and clutched the shark tightly against your chest. Vark seemed to love the attention and began to get all giddy from your loving embrace.

You pulled away from him after a few minutes, and began to observe the scenery around you. You appeared to be in some sort of alleyway, noting that there was garbage and other things that you didn't care to find out what it was exactly. You stood up slowly, and nearly fell back to the ground when you felt your knees shake.

Damn, you fell hard.

(Not as hard as you fell for Vincent though)

Vark noticed that you were in pain, and began to lick you again as a way of comforting you. You smiled softly and patted his smooth head in reassurance that you would be alright. Vark got the memo, and jumped from your arms. You attempted to stand again, and lent against the wall for support.

"Vark, I need you to do me a small favour." You said with a small voice. Vark wagged his fin and his tongue poked out of his mouth in anticipation for what your next words would be.

"Can you go up ahead and see if there is anyone that can help me? I don't think I'm going to be able to get around."

Vark tilted his head to the side in slight confusion to your words, to which you sighed heavily.

"I'm hurt Vark. I need help." You said a bit more simply. Vark recognised the phrase from when you trained him years ago, and immediately ran around the corner of the alleyway in search of some suitable help.

Who are you kidding? This is Hell. Why would anyone want to help? You sighed and placed your fingers on the bridge of your nose to attempt to relieve some stress that was building up.

What a rotten day.

+++

Minutes turned into hours, and you began to grow weary that something had happened to Vark. That is until you heard the familiar pat pat of Vark's fins.

You looked up from the corner you were hiding in, and noticed a very tall demoness was approaching you with Vark and-was that Molly?

"Oh my gosh! Are you alright?!" The demoness exclaimed with pure worry in her tone. You smiled weakly and shook your head.

"No, I-I'm sorry if I'm a bit of an inconvenience. You see, I was kinda kicked out of Heaven? And I'm injured from falling. . ." You babbled on. Maybe you hit your head harder than you thought.

The demoness held a sympathetic gaze in her eyes, and she looked over to her companion who was observing you as if you were an anomaly.

"Wait, you're from Heaven?"

You nodded your head, and the fellow seemed to get all smiley. Why? Who knows.

"That's crazy toots! Ya know, my sister is up there, I wonder if you eveh got to meet 'er."

You shrugged nonchalantly.

"I didn't meet much folk up there. I'm not much for socialising."

The spider-like dude nodded his head in understanding.

"'Tis fine, we are all different. Anyway, the name is Angel Dust, and this is her majesty Charlie." He pointed to himself then waved one of his other arms to the blonde demoness, who you now know as Charlie.

She was beaming with complete and utter joy. Why do they both smile so much when they are in the fiery pits of inferno?

"You need to come back with us and tell us EVERYTHING! You could be so helpful for my hotel!" Charlie began, but then immediately stopped once she noticed you were very much lost.

"I'm so sorry for being so direct with you! I'm Charlie, as Angel said. I should've asked if you wanted our help first. I mean, of course you want my help! I mean, do you?" She awkwardly trailed off when she noticed that you were staring at her as if she had grown another head.

Hotel? What does she mean by that?

"What she is trying to ask is if you needed a place to stay?" Angel asked, brushing his hands through his hair (was it hair?) and smoothing it over. His hair (it was definitely not hair but you didn't know what else to call it.) reminded you of Molly, and your heart ached at the thought of Kai and Molly going to your apartment and not finding you there.

You felt tears welled up in your eyes, but you tried hard to not look like you were about to burst into a puddle of sadness and utter hopelessness.

Charlie noticed this, however, and she crouched down to your height and engulfed you with the warmest hug you've ever received in a long time. You felt the dam break, and immediately you began to sob. At this point, you don't even know what you are crying over.

Maybe it's for everything that has happened over the past-decade?

Decades?

You were not entirely sure at this point honestly.

You both eventually entangled each other from the hug, and she offered you a hand to help you up. You took it gratefully, and stood up slowly to prevent yourself from falling back over. Charlie smiled at you softly, to which you grinned back.

"Alright now, are we headin’' back to the Hotel?" Angel asked with a hint of impatience in his voice. Charlie nodded her head, but looked back at you to make sure that is what you wanted. You properly smiled that time, and they both took the answer as 'yes'.

+++

The hotel was nothing like how you imagined. You learned on the trip there that the hotel was a place where sinners dwelled to try and redeem themselves to earn salvation.

That was the most wholesome thing you thought you would ever hear in Hell. There's hope for you yet.

You were currently in the lounge of the hotel, where a lot of 'group activities' took place on a daily basis. You and Vark were on top of a very comfortable couch that was tucked away in a corner. You were honestly so comfy, that you felt yourself dozing off. Until you heard a voice that made you want to rip your ears off.

"Why, hello! I didn't know our beloved Charlie had once again found another unfortunate soul to try out her silly project!"

The man's voice sounded muffled, almost as if he was speaking through some sort of antique microphone from ages ago. You made eye-contact with the looming figure, and noticed he reassembled a deer in a strange and unique way.

Who the Hell was this man? And why is he so-red?

As if he could read your mind, he shoved his hand in your face to shake and practically announced to the hotel who he was.

"The name is Alastor! Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel!" You smile you returned was weak but you still shook his hand, and sighed when you realised he wasn't about to break your hand like the other guy. Mr. Heart or whatever his name was.

That stupid prick. You were mad at him again.

"No need to frown, dear! Smile some more! You're never fully dressed without one!"

This Alastor was starting to get on your nerves. And he seemed to be a staff member of the place, which only meant you would be seeing him a lot. That is if you stayed. Also, his own smile was slightly unnerving. . .not to mention kind of creepy.

"Alastor! Leave the poor girl alone." you heard Charlie call from another part of the lounge. Alastor rolled his eyes before he turned hot on his heels to argue back that he was simply 'introducing' himself.

Whatever, you didn't really care.

You stood up from the couch, Vark following closely, and began to sneak away from the chaos of the Hotel. You eventually found yourself on the sidewalks of the busy street of some part of town.

One thing you noted was how many bright neon lights decorated the sides of buildings and billboards. Vark seemed to be lost in the flashing colours and noises of the advertisements playing on TV's.

There were so many TV's. Which triggered a long lost memory that you never remembered from your time in Heaven.

It was a year or so after you and Vincent got married. He had just landed a job as a news reporter for a small company that was local to your hometown. You were aware that he loved all the new technology that was being released too quickly to follow up on. But you never expected him to one day bring back an extremely expensive TV for your living room.

"Vincent! What on Earth did you get this time?"

He rolled his eyes and rolled a portable box TV into the kitchen for you to examine.

"I got us a TV. It's especially for you so you can watch me when I'm on the afternoon news." He said with a cheeky smile. You chuckled at his antics and headed over to him to give him a hug.

"You're such an attention seeker, and you're also adorable."

He only laughed at that, and hugged you back just as tightly as you.

"Only for you doll, only for you."

The memory faded, and it left you standing idiotically in the middle of the sidewalk. That was new, and not to mention, so heartwarming.

You missed Vincent. A lot. And you were aware you kept thinking about him. Must be because your memories are no longer blocked.

Vark began to bark at an advertisement when you noticed a man with a TV for a head appeared on one of the TV's close to you. He was talking about some sort of security system, but you didn't care. What you did care about was how familiar his grin was to you.

That wasn't a coincidence, was it?

Vark distracted you from your thoughts when he began to run away when the scent of seafood wafted through the air. You out called after him and began to spring after the shark.

How does an animal run so fast with fins?

You once again got lost in your thoughts and didn't notice that you and your runaway shark were headed towards a huge crowd that was forming in front of a building nearby. Vark, being so small, ran in between the demons of all sizes and continued on his way. You were about to do the same until you ran into someone and knocked yourself and the stranger down.

"Woah! Careful where you're running off to!"

"I am so sorry!" You squealed when you realised that you had unintentionally caused a scene. You had landed completely on top of a random person; in front of a huge crowd; and it was the same man with the TV head.

Ah, what luck you had. Your thoughts were cut off when the TV headed man began to look you up and down, which made you very...uncomfortable? But his gaze felt familiar, as if instinct was telling you you knew this strange man.

"I feel like I've seen you before, do I know you?" He began, but you cut him off when you scrambled to your feet when you noticed Vark returned to you with some fish in his mouth. Or what you assumed was fish.

"Vark! You are in so much trouble!" You announced, bending over to pick up the mischievous land-shark that has caused oh-so-many problems with you today.

You heard people around you murmur, to which you raised your brow to, but decided to ignore. You turned back around to again apologise to the man you so rudely knocked over, but found him staring at you as if you had hung the stars in the sky.

What was his deal?

You heard him mumble your name, which definitely made you jump a bit.

"What was that?"

He rushed over to you instantly and immediately grabbed your arm and pulled you into the building the crowd was forming around, completely ignoring all the commotion that began to arise outside.

You both eventually reached a secluded corridor, and you found yourself standing in close proximity with the man.

Who even is he? And what the fuck gave him the right to drag you around like a doll?

He called your name again, and you felt his hands gently cup your cheeks. You met his artificial gaze, and you all but gasped when it all finally clicked.

Vincent Holland. Your long lost and beloved husband.

"V-Vincent?" You stammered, completely bewildered that you had somehow found him in a city with millions of people. Maybe luck was truly on your side finally.

"H-how?" You started, but got cut off when a pair of digital lips met yours in a sweet kiss. Your eyes widened in shock: you were kissing a TV. But this was also your husband. (Who had a screen for a head somehow…)

You closed your eyes and wrapped your arms around his neck and deepened the kiss, humming softly when he began to bite and suck at your lips. You pulled away, however, when Vark began to cry from the lack of your attention.

"Vark! Stop it!" you scolded him. Vincent chuckled at the interaction to which you raised a brow.

"What's so funny?"

"Oh nothing. I also have a land-shark named Vark." he stated as if it were the most obvious thing. Your eyes widened in disbelief.

"Are you being serious?"

"Yes, doll. I got him as soon as I found out you could have one. And I named him Vark because, well, we always joked about it."

You smiled so sweetly at this. You and Vincent coincidently having a pet shark and naming them the same was just too heartwarming to you. You pulled him back into another kiss, to which Vincent welcomed whole-heartedly.

You pulled away after a minute when your lungs burned for air, and noticed Vincent was staring at you adoringly.

"What is it?" You asked.

"I thought I would never see you again. You don't know how much I've missed you. I looked for you everywhere as soon as I was able to to it safely. Even though it didn't happen as fast as I wanted, I knew I would always find you." he whispered. He kissed your head gently, which you leaned into slightly.

You felt your heart ache a little, when you realised that he probably didn't get to live in an oblivious bliss to your absence. A perk of living in Heaven, you supposed, was the lack of memory of anything that could make you wish the fiery pits of Inferno.

"Me too Vincent, me too. I'm so glad that I found you again." you placed your forehead against his (screen), and shared a loving embrace.

You and your beloved Vincent, was once again, united. 

i finally looked over it, and part one of the prologue is up. if there is any mistakes i didnt catch, feel free to let me know!

also, i love vark. he carries this story ngl.

But I still will because this story felt very. . .rushed. even though it's so DAMN LONG HOLY SHIT.

-will

[lahooozaherr]

IWAFY update

Alright, so! I had the goal to finish it before my Texas trip the other weekend but life had other plans, as it usually does. My grandpa is in the dying process and I was able to spend some time with him and my family. I thought I’d be writing/reading to cope in between things but I didn’t and that’s ok! I’m doing my best to grieve and process my emotions. The weekend was much better than I had originally thought it would and I’m very grateful for that.

I’m almost done with chapter 4, I’m currently fleshing out the last bit and deciding for sure where I want to end it so I know how to go into the next.

I’m also working on a fanfic rec list. I was almost done when I found out you can only do like 50 tags :’) so I need to revisit it later.

If you’ve been waiting for the next chapter, thank you so much. I’m grateful just to even have readers (after sifting through fake, bot and ageless accounts 🫠). It’s been so fun just to be writing again.

[dee-and-scully]

Hey, guys! Just a curious question about chapter 3?! Will it be centered around Louis seeing Clem again or maybe giving a run down of Clem's life, too? Louis being her knight in shining armor is just the cutest. You know, a boy who has everything and a girl who doesn't have much, but is still satisfied with life.

Sorry, I missed this story so much and those questions came out of nowhere. I miss you guys 😭💕

heyyy! dee here! chapter three is going to be focused a bit more on clem's life, since chapter two focused on louis and his living situation i won't say much, but their paths with cross again in this chapter! we appreciate the support sm :))

[scullyy]

Excuse me, Scully? I just wanted to ask if “I Will Always Find you” will be updated? Will it be a full story? 😩 It’s so good and I miss it. You and Dee are amazing for writing in the story in the first place. I’m just wondering about it. Clouis content has been so dry lately. Please, come back <3

Chapter 3 is in production!!! Dee is writing it this time, so we all know it's gonna fr slap.

The support warms me💖

[rjhpandapaws]

I will Always Find You

Ch 4: Do You Truly Mourn for a Stranger in Passing? Tw: Death mention

When he opened his eyes again he was human. The pain was his most vivid memory, and he could almost convince himself it was lingering even now. He was given time in the Beyond because by the time he was fully bound to his human form Simon was alive and had been for some time. He was given a life story and thrown out into the world to go look for him. He remembered Death asking what he wanted his binding condition to be. He remembered asking that he and Simon always be able to find one another. So this should have been simple. They had to at least put him close to where Simon was, right? Surely fate wouldn’t have him spent the few years that made up a human life chasing Simon’s shadow. Or maybe he just wasn’t used to being human yet. His sleep was restless. He was plagued with flashes of Simon’s old lives, all the things he had done wrong without knowing how to fix them. So he spent little time sleeping and as much time as he could looking for Simon. The thing of it was that human bodies apparently needed rest and his wasn’t too happy about being denied sleep. Markus soon found himself sick for the first time in his short human life. Nothing major thankfully, but it was a painful reminder of how weak he had become.

After he let himself rest for a couple of weeks he got back to looking for Simon. Humans lived such short lives so he didn’t want to miss his chance. He didn’t know the first place to start looking so he spent a lot of his time wandering around and hoping for the best. It wasn’t the greatest plan, but it felt better than just waiting around for Simon to come to him. In all the lives they had spent together Simon had wanted to learn everything there was to know. So Markus spent a lot of time looking in libraries and places like that. Looking back, that was probably the reason he had missed Simon the moment they had actually crossed paths because passing him on a side street wasn’t where Markus thought they would have met. So he didn’t think to look up. Maybe if he had, things would have been different. He’d expected this to be easy. He thought he would have been able to sense Simon like when he had been a being of fate. Except that wasn’t how being a human worked. So he passed Simon on a side street in the rain and lost the one change he had been given to set things right. To love Simon they way he had always wanted to, but in true human fashion that didn’t sink in until there was nothing he could do about it.

He couldn’t shake the feeling something was wrong after that. Something changed when it wasn’t supposed it, something small, but now everything was out of place. It felt like a painting hanging crooked on a wall. He tried to the best of his ability to figure out what had changed, but he came away with nothing. Not until the day he woke up silently crying and couldn’t stop. Markus went through is day content to assume this was just another of the strange things that happened to human bodies on occasion. Then he came across the missing person’s poster. Staring up at him from the paper was Simon. He knew before he looked at the name. He would have known those eyes anywhere. It was with a cold dread that he realized that he had seen those eyes before, and passed them off as the eyes of a stranger all because Simon hadn’t been where where Markus expected him to be. And now he was gone. He knew with a level of certainty that he wasn’t going to find Simon now, no matter how hard he looked. It was desperation that kept him from giving up. He knew what had taken Simon, because it was something that had taken him before. He’d gone looking for knowledge he wasn’t meant to have and without Markus there to protect him he had been consumed by it. Regret ate at him, and he let it. He deserved it.

Grief and regret eventually turned to anger and for a time Markus tried to get back at the world that had taken Simon from him. It was futile of course, he was only human and the path of fate didn’t answer to him anymore. Anger eventually turned back into grief, and that grief into the resolve to do better the next time he was given the chance. The Beginning might have won this time, but it would be her last victory over him. The revolution started now. He was a god turned man, but he was still war incarnate. He would get his revenge one life at a time.

[agentsnickers]

Okay so moments that have always stuck out to me, and I know I’ll miss some here, but anything with sprace in parallel, I love all of Bullseye but my favorites are Jack and Davey’s conversation at the reunion after seeing Dave’s cousin, and Jacks thoughts on his relationship with the HCJ family, specifically his relationship changing with Race and Spot. Benny in IWAFY and angry Les at any time. Honestly it’s kinda hard to choose and I know I could keep going but I’ve run out of room.

Oooh, these are all such good ones!!

I love how the reunion sequence turned out, especially since it’s tied to the big fight in the first fic. And I think it was the first time I actually had Jack talk about the fact that the exes club thing bothered him, which is a big deal.

[itsmewillful]

For Ever, and Ever {PART ONE}

Main Masterlist

Character Masterlist:

(Vox x fem!reader)

Word Count: 5725 (oh gosh, the prologue is gonna have a part two because i get too excited with leading the story on and on...*sobs*)

Outline: (PART ONE of the Prologue to I will Always Find You (IWAFY) This part introduces how Vox (Vincent Holland) and reader met. It includes a little bit of build-up, but most of all, FLUFF and your favourite ROMANCE! Vox and reader are two idiots in love fr.

(You don't need to read IWAFY to understand this story.)

Warning(s): Time-period typical sexism and racism (barely any but I'm still adding it just so you all are aware), bullying, and verbal abuse. Along with: Canon typical violence, language, etcetera. IF ANY OF THESE THINGS TRIGGER YOU, PLEASE DON'T READ. Also, it wasn't proofread, I stayed up too late trying to get this out so errors are possible!

A/N (PLEASE READ!): Reader is 16 in this story, and some things may not be time accurate. I also DO NOT CONDONE or SUPPORT to any kind of bad behaviour shown in this story, and any kind of possible mentioning acceptability of such things WILL BE BLOCKED from my account. Thank you, and I hope you respect this!

A/N 2:Also, don't feel shy to tell me what I can improve on! I love taking some criticism so I can work on my stories. And of course, feel free to share with me what you like most so I can get an idea what you all are looking forward to more.

Story below the cut:

It was the first day of High School.

Yes, High School.

You woke up rather early that morning all giddy and had a small bounce to your step when you descended your stairs after getting ready for school. Your mother and father smiled softly at your anticipation for beginning your next chapter in life, and you, of course, smiled back. 

You felt happy all the way until you stepped into the building, and immediately fell victim to them.

Some people would call them the ‘Highschool Pretty Girls.’ You just mentally called them ‘The Rich-Stuck-Up Pricks.’ Because they were literally that–rich and stuck up. 

You had felt rather confident that morning in your newly pressed sundress, that was rather expensive for your family’s minimum wage income. You loved it. A lot.

But now you wished you wore something else. All because the Rich Girls at the entrance of the school giggled at you and whispered to one-another not so discreetly about the new ‘fresh-meat’ that they were going to torment.

You held back some tears that were threatening to spill when you heard one of the girls giggling about how your complexion didn’t match your outfit at all, which of course was the needle that broke the camel's back and you began to feel tears fall slowly.

The ‘ring-leader’ of the group noticed your predicament, and began to wiggle her fingers at you in a faux wave, as if she was taunting you to continue crying. You huffed and turned hot on your heels and stomped away from the group.

No need to be crying over stupid brats. 

You looked at your timetable, and noticed your first class was advanced literature, which brought your sullen mood up significantly. If there was one thing you loved, it was reading and writing books. I mean–you tried writing books, but you mostly read them. Opening the door to your designated classroom, you noticed that there were already quite a lot of students seated. You looked around to find a place to sit, and noticed that almost all the desks in the far back of the room were already taken. Figures. 

You eventually settled for a desk closest to one of the middle-row windows, and smiled when you realised that the view was perfect to zone out to. You began to shift through all your belongings, and pulled out a simple-spiralled notebook and a pencil. 

“Hello neighbour!” 

You looked up from your notebook and noticed a girl with a dark-skin complexion smiling and waving at you with pearly-white teeth. You smiled weakly back, and attempted a wave. To say you were shy was an understatement.

The girl seemed to notice your quietness, and found that as an opportunity to scoot a bit closer to your desk to introduce herself.

 “The name is Carly Burns. I’m new to the area and I’m trying to make friends. What’s your name?” She held her hand out to you, and you shook it gently. You felt your palms get clammy from nerves, and smiled awkwardly when she wiped her hands on her dress. 

“Sorry,” you mumbled. 

“‘Tis fine! It’s a collaborative effort. I’m sure my hands were the sweatiert ones. Not gonna lie, it’s really humid here. Most be all the boys.” She snickered.You smiled at her attempt to relieve some of the tension, and you said your name to which she repeated with a smirk.

“Nice name for a nice girl! Can’t wait to get to know ya. Say, are you doin’ anythin’ for lunch?”

You shook your head, and her smile seemed to get bigger.

“Great! My sister, her boyfriend and her boyfriend’s brother are all gonna be there. Which will be great for you since you seem to be a wee bit shy.” 

“That’s a mouthful. Also, who is to say that I won’t shrink away when they try talking to me?” you asked meekly. Carly’s charming laugh rang in your ears, before she waved you off as if you said something ridiculous.

“I doubt it. You seem to handle me just fine. And I’m the most talkative.” 

You nodded your head, and looked back up towards the front of the classroom when your teacher entered the room.

+++

“Yoohoo! Over here!” 

You turned your head to your side and noticed your newly acquainted desk-buddy, Carly, and a couple of other teens you didn’t recognise. You smiled shyly and began to tread the short distance to their table. 

“Hey, how was your third period?” you asked, mostly directed to Carly. She smirked, and held her hands up to give you a thumbs-up, to which you nodded. 

“So, I already unofficially introduced you to my friends, but you are yet to know them!” She pointed to a girl that was sitting gracefully beside her. You knew that was Carly’s sister from noticing how similar their smiles were. It looked very mischievous.

“This is my twin sister, Ava.” She then pointed to a boy sitting across from her, and you learned that his name was Troy, and the lucky boyfriend of Ava. The last person to be introduced seemed to be too busy scribbling away in a notebook to care of your presence.

“And this wonderful fellow is Vincent. Who seems to be too preoccupied with writing ‘fanfiction’ to care about meeting you.”

As soon as the word ‘fanfiction’ fell from Carly’s lips, the teen immediately looked up from his book and glared at her.

“For the record, Miss Burns, it isn’t fanfiction. You wound me. It is my own, and completely original script.”

“Oh you’re right. Maybe an ‘adaptation’ to your favourite movie then. Anyway, don’t be a prude and ignore our new comrade. C’mon now, say ‘hello’ to her, Vinny.” Carly said, examining her nails as if she didn’t care for this ‘Vincent’s’ lame cover-up. (He actually was writing a fanfiction of his favourite murder-mystery by the way.)

Vincent rolled his eyes before he slammed his book shut and looked up to make eye-contact with you. His sapphire blue eyes seemed to pierce yours, and you felt tempted to look away to break his uncomfortable gaze. To say he was handsome was an understatement. This man was drop-dead gorgeous. Curly dark hair that framed his face perfectly, and he seemed to have a slight obsession with the colour blue since his outfit mostly consisted of the shade. 

But, he's also kinda–scary? His eyes seemed to hold some sort of pent-up anger. Whether it was directed to you or not, you were hoping he wouldn’t lash out at you.

“Hey! I’m Vincent. What’s your name?” He said, rather too casually for a guy that looked ready to find the nearest wall and beat it up.

You awkwardly stared at him, for you knew your name was already passed around the table twice now. But Vincent took your hesitation for something else and rolled his eyes playfully.

“Not much for words, aren’t ya? That’s fine I guess. I sometimes end up doing all the talking anyway.”

His brother burst into laughter, followed by Ava. Vincent raised a brow at their sudden commotion.

“What’s so funny to you two?” 

“Oh nothing Vinny, just that you’re so fucking stupid sometimes.” 

“Excuse me? Who the hell are you calling stupid?” Vincent said, with a tone of malice laced in his voice. Carly (being the angel she is) noticed the tension arising between the two brothers, and attempted to change the conversation to prevent a fight from happening.

“Enough you two! And Troy, keep your mouth shut if you’re going to swear. I won’t have a sailor courting my sister.” 

Troy immediately clamped his mouth shut, but his eyes still held intense eye-contact with his older brother. Vincent rolled his eyes at his sibling’s childish behaviour. 

“So, to answer the question you asked earlier Vincent; the lady’s name is y/n.”

Vincent nodded his head and seemed to repeat the words under his breath, before he stood up hastily and snatched his notebook off the table.

“Nice. Cool. Great to meet you. Anyway, I have somewhere to be. I’ll be right back.” And like that, he quickly shuffled away towards the exit of the luncheon room. That was kind of rude.

You raised a brow, silently asking Carly why he abruptly abandoned the table. She shrugged and motioned with her hands that he was ‘crazy.’ You giggled before slapping her hands down and telling her to be ‘nice’.

+++

The clock finally struck 2 o’clock and you are sure you never abandoned a classroom so fast in your entire life. You would’ve kept up the pace if it weren’t for you running into a familiar group of giggling bullies.  

You swear your soul momentarily left your body.

“Well, girls look! Isn’t it our beloved new freshmen!” a blonde girl with bright green eyes announced to her group, with an evil smirk gracing her freckled face. Well, you’ll be damned. You have never wished the ground to consume you so much right now.

“Hey dear, where did you get that dress? The donation box?” Another girl with a slightly darker complexion than the blonde girl. The three other girls of the group laughed obnoxiously, and you felt tempted to cover your ears to block out their shrill voices.

“No, actually. I bought it. Unlike you. I bet you spent all your ‘daddy’s’ money on your stupid lace and petticoats. Actually, I also bet that you have never even made your own money!” you spat out rather aggressively. Your eyes widened after the words spewed from your mouth. Nerves do marvellous things sometimes. 

The blonde girl’s eyes widened when she realised you stood up for yourself. (Even though it was pretty much accidental) Her eyes narrowed down at you and she began to saunter up to you and practically forced you to take a few steps back.

“Listen here you little-”

“Aye! Got your wrinkled hands off my friend!” 

You tilted your head to the side and noticed that Carly and Ava were both there standing with their arms crossed.

“Wrinkled hands? You filthy little brat, you better take that back or else-”

“Or else what? You’ll have your dear ol’ daddy call the school and report us? You don’t even know our names, bitch.” Carly confidently walked up to you, grabbed your hand, and tugged you along with her. You nearly tripped over your own feet from how strong she yanked you.

“You’ll regret this! I promise you will!” the blonde girl shrieked at the top of her lungs. Her group of friends circled around her to ‘calm their princess’ down. And to top off her dramatic display, she let a few fake tears trickle down her face. Ava made a gagging noise at their exaggerated emotions, and her sister chuckled at her theatrics.

When the warm air finally hit you, you let out a breath you had been holding in from the stress of the previous encounter. 

“You alright there?” Carly asked, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder.

You nodded your head, even though you weren’t sure you were alright. Those girls sure do know how to make you feel insecure. And of course, they just had to nitpick about your lack of excessive flauntering of wealth. 

Carly seemed to notice that you were in fact not alright, and she pulled you into a tight hug, which you reciprocated immediately. 

“Hey sunshine, don’t let those girl’s words affect you. They always find something to call out about you.” 

Ava eventually joined the hug, and you sighed happily, to which the other two girls giggled at.

“So, how about we three go out for some coffee or tea? I know I need some!” Carly announced with a beaming smile. Ava nodded at her sister’s idea, and you eventually joined in with the silent agreement.

“Great! I know just the place! I promise you, you’re gonna love it!”

+++

A few weeks later, you found yourself settling into a new schedule. You wake up, go to school and talk to Carly and Ava anytime there was a free period. Once in a while Troy was with his girlfriend, and you genuinely enjoyed his presence. However, you barely ever saw Vincent, but you didn’t care much since he was a junior with his own group of friends that he had.

But that doesn’t mean you didn’t wish he was around. When you first met him, he seemed genuinely interesting, and he appeared to share a similar passion with you for reading. Or in this case, writing.

Which is why it surprised you one day when he approached you. You were outside sitting in the school’s courtyard, enjoying one of your favourite books, The Hobbit, when a shadow fell over your form. You looked up and your eyes widened slightly at the sight of a certain junior you weren’t expecting to see.

“Hey there Miss Shyness! Haven’t talked to you in awhile. How’s school been for you so far?” 

Your mouth hung open slightly at his simple words. Why was he suddenly interested in how school was for you? He chuckled when you seemed momentarily lost for words, and took that as an invitation to continue talking.

“Hey, we’re past the awkward introductions now! You don’t need to feel shy talking to me. Unless I scare you, then that is totally understandable. I mean–sorry?” He cringed at his sudden deplete in confidence, but lightened up a little when you giggled lightly at his words.

“You’re very funny, has anyone ever told you that?” 

Vincent smirked at your words and placed his hands on his hips confidently. 

“No, as a matter-of-fact. Most people tell me to ‘shut-up’ when I try to joke around. But alas, there is a first time for everything, am I right?” he wiggled his eye-brows suggestively, and you gasped at the hidden meaning of his words.

“Hey! You’re talking to a lady here!” you feigned disgust, to which he laughed at a little more.

“And a very pretty lady too. Mind if I join ya?” he asked casually. You felt your face redden a little bit, and you coughed to help relieve some of the tingly-ness from your stomach. His simple compliment for some reason made you feel as if your insides were turning into butterflies. You shrugged it off as lack of approval from people growing up. 

“N-no, I don’t mind. But I’m not doing much, just reading.” You anxiously babbled. Where had your remaining confidence gone? Stupid butterflies. Vincent shrugged at your answer and basically plopped down on top of you.

“What book are you reading?” 

“The Hobbit.” you answered, you felt the blush beginning to creep back into your face, and quickly turned your head away so he wouldn’t notice.

“I’ve heard lots of good stuff about it. What do you think of it?” he asked. Your face felt hot at this point, and hoped he didn’t notice it. Why was he interested in your opinion on a silly book? I mean, you were actually rather flattered by it, and not being teased for reading such things.

“I like it, which is why I’m re-reading it for the up-teenth time.” you said simply, hoping your wavering voice came across as confident to your friend. (Was he your friend? You weren’t entirely sure)

“Ah, well, can I read with you?”

“What?” 

“Can I read with you?” 

Your brows rose high into your hairline from his question. Was he asking for an invite to involuntarily spend more time with you? You were sure you were going to have a heart attack at this point.

“S-sure, why not.” You answered, swallowing thickly when he felt you pulse speed up slightly. You mentally scolded yourself for acting so silly. He only wanted to read along with you, so why are you getting all clammy from his simple gesture?

Maybe it’s because you truly have never had such an intimate moment with a boy before. You exhaled slowly to calm your nerves down, and nearly passed onto the next life when you felt warm hands graze against your back to pat you gently.

“There, there. No need to breath so hard. If me being close to you bothers you so you can just tell me to fuck off.” 

You shook your head vigorously, and your hair almost wacked him in the face. He chuckled at your actions and decided that you were alright with the close-seating arrangement. A beat passed, and you eventually found the courage to open the book and continue the entertaining story of Bilbo Baggins and the Dwarves.

+++

“He did what?”

“He asked me if he could read along with me.” You replied to Carly once again. You both were currently in your bedroom, sitting on top of your newly dew-bleached blanket. It was a gift from your late grandmother for your eleventh birthday, and finally got around to unpacking it and bleaching it to safely wash. Carly absolutely loved it, and joked about taking it back home with her. And said female was currently staring at you as if you had grown a pair of wings and were flying.

“I heard you for the first time girl! I can’t believe he would do that though!” she practically beamed with excitement for your little ‘hang-out’ with Vincent earlier that day. You felt your ears turn pink from the memory, and Carly smirked when she noticed how hot and bothered you looked.

“Seems to me my little ‘princesa’ is in lovey-dovey with a certain Holland boy.” You groaned aloud in embarrassment, and instantly noticed your mistake when you didn’t immediately correct her of you not having a crush on him.

Well, damn.

Carly’s smirk turned into more like a wicked grin, and you shrank away into your pillows as if you could disappear into them.

“Ha! I knew it! You know, you were so obvious that you liked him when he first introduced himself. Hearts basically swirled in your eyes like one of those cartoon characters.” 

Your face was basically red at this point, and you felt too called out to even come up with a witty come-back.

“So” she trailed off mischievously, before winking at you and continuing her teasing rant.

“Whatcha think I should tell Mr. Holland about a certain little freshman’s crush?” 

You gasped and jumped on her to cover her mouth as if she was going to announce to the entire city your current darkest secret.

“You wouldn’t dare!” you cried. Carly laughed wickedly at your growing despair from the lack of control of the conversation. 

“You’re right, I wouldn’t. I am a strict follower of ‘Girl’s Code.’ Good thing Ava isn’t here, she tends to babble everything to her beloved boyfriend of hers, who most certainly shares things with said crush of yours.” 

You felt your eyes flutter shut in slight reassurance that your new little crush wasn’t going to be announced to anyone. Thank goodness Carly was a genuine friend.

“Anyway, speaking of the Holland’s, Troy’s turning 16 next week and we are both invited to his party he’s hosting. But just to make you aware, his parents are a little. . .intense.”

You raised a brow.

“What do you mean, ‘intense?’” you questioned, slight worry wavering in your tone of voice.

“Well, Mr. and Mrs. Holland are a bit of the ‘stuck-up’ upperclassmen, and don’t exactly appreciate their sons meddling with us ‘lesser-folk.’ Not saying you’re lesser than them! I just mean-”

“I understand.” you sighed heavily. “Please don’t tell me that-”

“Not to worry! Vincent and Troy are nothing like their parents. In fact, I betcha that their parents know little-to-nothing about their kids! They were both raised by nannies or somethin. Doesn’t matter though. What does is that they are both the sweetest, and not to mention, the most polite men I have ever met. Actually, Vincent seems to have a bit of an ego–but other than that, they’re both great!” 

You nodded at her words, processing them slowly and thinking hard about the new information.

Should you try to get with a boy who has (from what you gathered) silly (as in biassed-opinionated, and possibly sexist,) , stuck-up parents? You sighed heavily at the mental war, and smiled thankfully when a warming hand was placed on your shoulder to ease your growing inner-conflict.

“Hey old sport! No need for a mental breakdown! You can have one of those romantic relationships where you run off into the sunset from fear of the parents' judgement. Now I’m getting ideas for my own relationship–and I’m single!” She exclaimed, pure and utter joy in her voice. You giggled quietly and shook your head at her playfulness. You sometimes wished you had her ‘sweet-imagination.’

But now, the idea of running away was locked away in your brain.

+++

The day of Troy’s birthday-party was finally here. You, Carly and Ava were busy in their bedroom getting ready for the big event. You had learned two days prior that the Holland’s birthday parties were more along the lines of ‘balls,’ which made your mouth drop in astonishment. How wealthy was this family?

The dress code wasn’t too complicated, but wasn’t too low-budget friendly either. But being the living angel like always, Carly had a spare gown for you to wear and you couldn’t be more thankful for. Some mending was required on the dress to make sure it would fit your form correctly, but other than that, it was perfect.

It was a flowy, white gown that had blue lace embroidered on the sleeves, neck and waist. To say you fell in love (a second time) with the dress was an understatement. 

After your small trio felt ready to leave, you both admired each other lovingly and shared some supporting compliments to one another to share the ‘confidence.’

“Damn girl! Vincent is going to trip over himself when he sees you walking in! A literal goddess is among us!” Carly said teasingly, and her sister verbally agreed happily, to which you blushed at thankfully.

The drive to the Holland Home wasn’t too long, and you gasped aloud when you spotted how large the house was. 

You knew the Hollands were rich, but not that rich.

“What does Mr. Holland even do to get this much money?” You asked, your eyes widened in disbelief of the large town-house that towered over you and your friends. 

“Mostly inheritance I believe. But their father is a TV show host or something. A lot of money comes from that, I bet.” Ava answered nonchalantly, to which you nodded in response.

You eventually found yourself in a ballroom-like area, and found that there were many sophisticated looking couples already dancing around with each other. There was even a live orchestra? What the fuck?!

Your eyes were close to falling out of your skull from how wide they were, but your internal admiration for the fashionable house was interrupted when Ava announced she was going to look for her boyfriend. Carly waved her off with some sort of remark about how ‘love-sick’ she was, before kissing her cheek and joining your side.

“So, whatcha thinking so hard about? Your face tenses up when you're having a mental spiral.” Carly said rather casually. Your eyes widened a little when you realised how easy you were to read.

“I’m just admiring the view. It’s not often when you’re in an upperclassmen’s house.” 

“Well, if all works out for you, you could be living in this house.” 

You gasped at your friend's comment, and felt your cheeks redden instantly.

“Carly Burns! You can’t say things like that!” 

She laughed loudly, and drew some attention from minglers that were standing near to you. You awkwardly smiled at one couple, when their eyes narrowed at you suspiciously.

“Sorry, I couldn’t help myself! It’s just too easy.”

“What’s too easy?” a familiar voice interrupts.

Well, speak of the devil and he shall appear.

“Hey, Vincent! How are you? Quite the party you have going on!” Carly said, forcing a more serious expression on her face, even though she was rather close to bursting into laughter.

You wished sometimes she wasn’t so ‘golden-retriever’ like in moments like this.

“I’m alright, Carly. And yes, it is a very extensive party, isn’t it?” He said, looking at you to see if you would agree with him. 

Aww, he wanted your input on things, how cute.

Your cheeks were burning again. 

You need to get a hold of yourself.

“Eh heh, hey.” you waved at him awkwardly, but smiled a bit more when he waved back with a smirk gracing his handsome face.

“Hey there, Miss Shyness! Glad to see you made it!” he practically beamed at you, and you felt your face burn even more from his soft gaze.

“I’ll leave you both to it! And Vincent,” Carly motioned him over to her, and he inched a bit closer to her side so she could whisper something in his ear. From the way his cheeks reddened a little, you could tell she said something that embarrassed him.

Eventually, she skipped off to find someone else to bother, and you were left all alone with (the love of your life) friend. A beat passed, and the silence was interrupted when he reached out a hand to you to take.

“May I have this dance, Miss Shyness?” He asked with a dramatic bow. Wow, how gentlemen like of him. You giggled mentally. 

But you felt your blood run cold a bit when you fully processed his words. You didn’t know how to dance, especially for an event like this!

“What’s wrong? You don’t have to if you don’t want to.” He answered, sounding a little bit disappointed in your indirect ‘rejection.’

“It’s not that I don’t want to. I really do. I just don’t know how to dance.” you answered truthfully, waiting for the possible rejection of him learning of the inconvenience.

“Remember what I told you a week or so ago?” 

You searched your brain, but couldn’t find anything from your past interactions involving dancing.

“I said,” he continued when he noticed your hesitation, “that there’s a first time for everything.”

Your eyes widened when the memory came back to you, and you felt your lips curl into a small smile.

“I’ll be honest with you, but I’m not that much of a good dancer myself, but we can still learn together. Please?” He held his hand out to you again to take, and you swore your heart was close to bursting out of your chest.

You took his outstretched hand, and shivered slightly at his warm and inviting touch. You looked up and noticed he was already looking at you and smiling brightly. 

What a handsome young man.

“C’mon, let’s go to a more quiet area.” He began to lead you through the crowd, and you raised your brow when you realised he was leading you to double-doors, which you assumed led to a garden outside.

“When you said ‘more quiet,’ I thought you meant a less crowded area.” You stated when you ventured out into a very-well kept garden. Vincent smiled at your words but continued to lead you down a path that had roses planted on the sides. 

“Nope. I meant it for real. Nobody can disturb our little ‘practise’ out here. Especially my…parents.” He trailed off a bit when he mentioned his overruling parents. 

The butterflies were back, but this time, ten-fold. 

Vincent once again noticed your hesitation, and took it as you being uncomfortable.

“Hey, if you don’t want to be outside with only me, we could go back-”

“No!” You cut him off, and your eyes widened at your own little outburst. Vincent didn’t seem fazed however, and took that as a que to grab onto your waist and pull you in closer to him.

Your blush intensified, and you were sure he noticed it now, and was thankful he didn’t call attention to it. He began to lead you in a simple two-step dance, and thankfully, no toes were stepped on yet.

After a small pause of silence, Vincent spoke up to you again.

“You look very lovely tonight.” He said softly. You looked up from the ground and made eye-contact with him. He had a soft smile etched onto his face, and you could feel your heart skip a beat from it. 

“T-thank you. You look quite dashing yourself, Vincent.” You stumbled on your words bashfully, but he paid no mind to your shyness, and in fact, found it quite cute.

“Of course. I spare no compliments with people I think are worth receiving.”

Your brow raised in slight confusion of his words, and he seemed to take that as you not appreciating his choice of language and he immediately back-tracked on himself.

“Sorry! That came out more rude than I meant! What I meant to say was a lot of people etch for compliments even though they don’t exactly deserve them. You are different. I-I. . .” his confidence seemed to dissipate immediately and it was amusing to you how you made him get nervous just from a simple expression.

His hands dropped from his waist and he brought them up to his face to cover his eyes in embarrassment. He groaned in self-pity and was inwardly begging for you not to view him differently after his little ‘word mix-up’.

You brought your hands up to his and pulled them from his face slowly. His eyes widened a bit when you both made eye-contact again. You smiled shyly at him, and his familiar smirk returned back.

“You are such a dork, Vincent.” You said with a flirtatious tilt of your head. You batted your lashes at him and he visibly gulped at your action.

“O-only for you.” He said softly, to which your eyes widened in shock.

“W-what?” Your voice wavered with curiosity of his words. 

Your question was answered when his hands reached up to your chin and pulled you into a deep kiss.

Your eyes widened in shock–you were kissing the Vincent Holland. Holy fucking shit.

Your eyes fluttered closed, and you reached your hands up into his hair and tangled them into his locks. He hummed lovingly into the kiss when you pulled on them lightly. Feeling a little too confident, he opened his mouth to leave an open mouth kiss on your lips, before he bit down a little too hard on your bottom lip. You groaned softly to the slight pain, but it was immediately forgotten when he sucked on your lip to ease the bite. 

“Vincent Holland, what the hell are you doing?!” a female voice shrieked, causing you and Vincent to immediately pull away from one another.

You both turned around and noticed a middle-aged woman in a deep-green dress standing there with her arms on her hips. And what a face she was making.

“M-mother, what a pleasant surprise?” Vincent awkwardly asked. His mother apparently didn’t like the answer and stomped over to and pulled him away from you.

“Why are you here spoiling your innocence with what looks like a lower-class girl!? Are you out of your damn mind?!” His mother screeched. You felt tears weld up in your eyes from the lack of care for your presence. How the fuck dare she treat you AND her son like this?

“Mother! You can’t say things like that!” Vincent yelled back, before he grabbed your hand and protectively hid you behind him.

“You’re an absolute disgrace to our family name if you decide to defend the girl!”

“I. Don’t. Care! This girl has shown more appreciation for my existence than YOU have in the past 17 years of my life!”

His moms mouth hung open in shock of her son's blatant disrespect of her ‘views.’ After a very tense beat of silence, she raised a hand as if she was about to hit her son, before she decided against it and brought it back to her hips.

“You have two choices here, Vincent, and I hope you choose wisely.” Vincent’s eyes narrowed on his mother, before he nodded his head to urge her to continue.

“You either drop the girl and keep a good view on our family name, or you go with the girl, and you're disowned and no longer recognised as our son.” Her features darkened as if she knew he would choose the first option and get her way. But the evil smirk she had going on dropped instantly when he backed away from her towards you.

“Why would I ever choose to be associated with you? You’re a psychopathic freak, and I’ll be damned if you get in the way of who I wish to be with! So I choose the second option, and I’ll be on my way now. Good-bye, Bonnie Holland.” 

And like that, he reached down and grabbed your hand securely, and led you out towards a back gate that led onto the busy streets of his neighbourhood.

What the fuck just happened?

Your face was still wet from your tears from the old hag’s ruthless insults and loveless verbal abuse towards her son. How does he deal with it?

You both continued to walk down the paved sidewalk that eventually led out to the busy streets, and you were sure Vincent could feel the sadness emanating from you in strong waves.

“I’m so sorry about that, doll. I wished you didn’t have to witness my psychotic mother’s temper.” He said, his voice wavering from equal dismay. You held back more tears from falling, and stopped walking to pull him into a loving embrace. He was stiff at first from the sudden intimate contact, but he eventually wrapped his own arms around you tightly. You raised yourself up a bit to give him a kiss on the cheek, to which he smiled at you for gratefully.

After your peaceful embrace ended, you attempted to lighten up the mood to invite him over to your own home.

“You hungry? I bet my mom has something we can chomp on left over at my ‘humble abode.’”

A small smile crept back on his face, and he nodded eagerly.

“I would love nothing more.”

Hand-in-hand, you both continued on your trek back to your home, giggling at each other happily.

Young love was truly magical.

[itsmewillful]

Vox Masterlist

Guide(s): SERIES📜 Fluff❣️ANGST🌧️ and MATURE CONTENT✨(such as Swearing and suggestive comments.)

I currently don't do smut, but if I do, I will add it to the list.

REQUESTS ARE OPEN!!!

If you wish to request, click here for rules and guidelines.

OneShots:

I will Always Find You (IWAFY)-🌧️❣️✨

For Ever, and Ever PART ONE , PART TWO (IWAFY)-🌧️❣️✨

Headcanons:

Vox x shy!lust ring imp!reader-requested❣️✨

[lahooozaherr]

I know I don’t have to apologize, I guess I still kind of am tho? I just wanted to post saying I appreciate getting tagged in games and stuff. I appreciate knowing y’all are thinking of me even when I’m not super active on here.

I’m kind of in a weird lull in my mental health right now. I’m not bad but I’m not great either. I’m getting through. But I’m also making many efforts to work on it. The state of the world and watching what’s happening in Gaza honestly tears my heart apart every day and I’m trying my best to do what I can and sit with the emotions and allow them to expand me. I never wish to be numb to it.

I started something called “somatic therapy” this week. I’m one session in so far and I’m already very impressed by my therapist. I think it’s the missing link in my journey, seeing as I’m sure I haven’t been “in my body” since I was 16. I’ve grown very critical of the biomedical model of mental health and for a long time I’ve felt traditional therapy no longer helps me.

I keep trying to think about my fic “I Will Always Find You” so I can create the new chapter, but inspiration hasn’t hit as much as I need. Rest assured that at this time, I still plan to continue it. This fic is a labor of love for myself (and Din lol). I occasionally have to fight back at the thoughts of “it’s not good enough” or “nobody wants to read it”. I know it’s not true, but also, I know I share my writing for myself and not solely for others to take in. Although I very much appreciate it when they do.

I have plans to write more, whether it’s fic or a blog of my musings/stream of consciousness. Bear in mind, IWAFY is the first fic I’d written after 10 years of not really writing at all, or being in fandom spaces like this. I was kinda scarred as a teen by fandom culture and how awful people used to be about self insert fic. I also had major life changes and trauma happened that made hobbies no longer feel good.

Uhh anyways, this was longer than I meant it to be. Just a long roundabout way of saying I appreciate everyone I have in this little corner I’ve carved for myself here. Imposter syndrome has been on high for a long time for me and I’m unlearning it.

[lahooozaherr]

Haha let’s see if I can finish that IWAFY chapter I promised last week while my husband gets his tonsils out (don’t let me promise like that ever again I’m sorry lol)

[lahooozaherr]

Life Update + Where I’m at with updating fic

Welp. I’ve been through a lot this past week, to say the least.

Last Tuesday my husband and I traveled down to FL to meet up with my family for our vacation. Part of it was spent at the Disney parks. Which was super fun!

Although, things happened that I’ll elaborate under the cut and leave a CW in the tags. (Also face reveal)

Unfortunately, on Thursday, we had found out our sweet Odie (one of my cats) had passed away. We are heartbroken and were very much devastated at the time. He was battling an infection the past month. We left him in the care of my sister in law, who discovered him that morning. Odie had FIV, which makes a cat’s immune system very fragile. His little body did not survive the infection. We were rest assured by our vet that we had done everything we could have and were supposed to. It was very hard coming home to one less fur baby yesterday. We’re very grateful that my sister and mother in law were here to help care for and preserve him. Part of me feels like he chose to wait for us until we were with my family so they’d be with me. Either way, it hurts. We miss him so much. But we’re happy he passed peacefully at home in his favorite bed with our other cat, Jeej, watching over nearby.

I was happy I got to spend time with my family though. We had tons of fun! I’ve had an interesting situation dealt to me in life. Both of my parents are passed, as well as my maternal grandmother that raised me, who I was very close with. When I was 16 I was taken in by my paternal aunt. She has her husband and three boys, who I call my brothers. I’ve never gotten to go on a family vacation so this was a real treat for me. Experiencing Disney with them was everything I could want and more. My husband and I were like kids on Christmas, especially at Galaxy’s Edge.

I sadly didn’t get to meet Din 🥲 it rained that day and they had to put him away. My husband tried to keep an eye out on the app but it didn’t happen. But it’s ok! I’m sure there will be other opportunities in the future. I had fun regardless. And plenty of merch.

I loved being with my family and all of the fun things we did. It was a very good trip and I’m grateful.

As far as fics go, I’m going to get onto editing my Joel fic and I’ll have that first chapter (or two?) out soon. Life has been a lot and I’d hoped to start my next chapter of IWAFY but my brain has denied me. I hope after some time settling back at home and into my routine I’ll be able to get those creative juices flowing.

In the meantime I’m excited to sit down and read everything I’ve saved. I’ll be around!

[lahooozaherr]

Life update???

It’s been a wild time for me the last couple weeks, to say the least. My grandpa passed away this last Sunday. I’ve had to help with a bunch of family drama from it, but it’s ended up in a lot of healing we’ve all needed, or at least something to propel us.

I didn’t have a close relationship with my grandpa. I was closer with my mom’s side grandparents (basically raised by them). I’ve been shuffling through some complicated grief over it all.

I got to take bereavement for three days. It’s sadly maybe the first time I’ve had off this year that wasn’t because of an event or being sick. It’s been helpful, giving me time to process and time to myself.

Thank you so much for all the love on my fics and fic rec list. It’s been so encouraging to open this app with new interactions. I feel like I’m starting to find my place here.

More bits of my rec list will be coming out. I didn’t want to spam other writers and I’ve been adding touches.

I’m working on IWAFY but my brain decided to push forward a Joel fic, which is funny to me because I’ve been sure I wouldn’t be pushing one out so soon. (Or at all? I just want to do him justice lol).

[lahooozaherr]

Life Update

I wanted to do this since it’s been a while, life has happened as it usually does.

I started my Death Worker apprenticeship in January and so far I’m loving it! I’m doing my best to not meet my homework with any stress energy and allow things to bloom on their own. I tend to worry about if I’m not doing enough. So I’m learning to let go and give in to uncertainty. I’ve really enjoyed my time with it so far and my mentor is great.

I’ve been having muscle issues with my shoulder and back. Since last year, and probably even father back, I’ve had this knot in my upper right trap that’s been a bitch to deal with. Admittedly I also didn’t do well at keeping up with my exercises. So now I’m amping up and doing better with it, I restarted my exercises and I’m lucky to now have some more freedom in my budget so I can schedule more massage sessions to really target it.

I had an EMG test done at the neurologist last week and wow, I hated that! Not a painful test but also not fun. But we at least made a baseline for that, and it turns out I don’t have any nerve damage. I’m getting with my doctor soon to discuss more options or what more I could be doing. It really sucks when it hurts and I’d like to not have to depend on a muscle relaxer for it.

Bad news is it’s my right side, so it affects my right arm and hand. That’s made it harder to do my homework, let alone writing fic.

IWAFY will be updated eventually when I get this under control and when inspiration strikes me. When I started it, my plan for it was loose and it still kind of is. But no worries for now, it’s still in the works and something I want to finish.

That’s all I’ve got for now so I’ll finish this off with reminding everyone to not stop talking about Palestine. I’m more active on Insta than here but I’m doing my best to balance that with sharing more here when I find it. I’m sure it’s a mix of me not being on as much and how news travels here poorly sometimes, but usually when there’s been a strike here I don’t end up seeing anything about it until it’s halfway through. Either way, it’s important that we remain aware and keep doing our part to help.

My “About Me” post and Joel related fics have been updated with a disclaimer and resources for Palestine. I encourage anyone else who writes for TLOU to create and add their own (or copy and paste mine lol) (if you do that just be aware that it doesn’t copy the links unless it’s on desktop. Idk why)

That’s all I’ve got for now. Love y’all!

[lahooozaherr]

I know I said I would have IWAFY chapter 6 out this week, but….I’m all of a sudden full of ideas for the next part of my Joel fic. Don’t ask me how I don’t know how my brain works anymore.

[lahooozaherr]

IWAFY update-ish~~

I’m currently working on chapter 4 and it’s ironic because I was stuck on chapter 3 thinking about all the things I wanted to write for this and now I feel like that scene from SpongeBob.

Anyways, I want to have it ready before I have to go to Texas next weekend because I genuinely want to, but we’ll see.

My grandpa’s health is declining so I and some family members are traveling to see him while we can. I’m not thrilled for obvious reasons, but also my family all in one place can be ✨drama✨. I won’t necessarily be inactive (probably will be reading fic to maintain sanity lol).

[rjhpandapaws]

I Will Always Find You

Ch 3: To Become Unknown (and Infinitely Remembered) Tw: Death

When he was a child it didn’t take Simon long to realize there was something about him that was different. Not in a way he could express at the time, or at least, not properly. He didn’t have the words back then; but he knew and remembered things he had never lived. Entire lifetimes; ancient things that should have been lost to time. He had died, three times. That by itself was enough to give him nightmares. It never failed, just before they would reach their worst point; he would hear a voice. Far too distant to make out the words; but soothing and hauntingly familiar nonetheless. He wondered who it was, and why they always called him by the wrong name. Even if he managed to know it was supposed to be his. When he got older he reconciled that these dreams were memories, and that ever distant voice became clearer. It haunted him still, but now he at least partially understood why. There had been a point in time that he had loved this person. The memories never told him if he’d ever had the strength to say it, and the voice that called to him always sounded crushed with grief. He hated that he couldn’t comfort them. Whenever he called back it went unanswered.

The memory that was the most vivid was of a library. Though in his opinion that word didn’t quite do it enough justice. The place felt like a pantheon of infinite knowledge. Any of the world’s greatest questions could have been answered within those walls. He didn’t know his connection to the place. Had he once protected it? Contributed to it? Had he really ever know anything that was worth contributing to such a library? He doubted it, but he marveled at the thing either way. Even if it was nothing more than a memory by this point. He also knew it had been destroyed and he mourned it. Someone, in a different distant past had told him such knowledge wasn’t meant for the minds of humanity. The library had burned for days. No known means had been able to master the flames, and Simon was glad he hadn’t been around to see it. He understood that the slightly less distant voice that chased away his nightmares has been responsible for both the creation of library and its ultimate destruction. For all of the things he knew of them, he didn’t know their name. Or much of what they looked like outside a very distinct set of eyes. One a deep blue that was reminiscent of the oceans depths and great destruction and the other a vivid green like the vast growth that always came after. Wisdom and Revolution; the phrase came to his mind unprompted. Not the strangest thing that had happened to him, and he felt just slightly close to the answers he was chasing after.

He lived his lives just before periods of great change. He could feel it this time too, even though it seemed he was destined to go through this one without the direct company of his companion, he understood a great change was on its way. Like all of the times before, he would miss it. He would be carried through in the memories of those that had known him. In the rain, on side street, he bumped into a dark skinned stranger with very distinctive and familiar eyes. One a deep blue, the other a vibrant green; and there was no recognition in them. Simon knew; felt it; and what had once been  indistinct memories clarified in that moment. His love, his patron, his god; was granted humanity and did not recognize him. He gave himself credit for not succumbing to his heartbreak until he got home. When the tears came he feared they might never stop. It was his turn to mourn. For someone he had lived more than once, for a stranger he had never met; for an ancient god that in his quest to change the world had left him to be forgotten. The people he had known would remember him, the person he once loved would not. It was something he didn’t have the power the change. Not yet anyway.

He looked for it though. The power to change it. At the place where what is and isn’t known meet, but even the knowledge he had always been meant to seek had forsaken him. Desperation set in, and he looked deeper into the things that had never been known. It swallowed him. In a moment like any other, Simon had disappeared. Somewhere else in world, a single tear fell from a vibrant green eye. In a place never known by Simon, a man named Markus mourned for a man he had loved more than once and never had the chance to meet. In a moment’s passing the universe’s greatest story became unknown. Wisdom broken and Revolution set free. The greatest change the world would ever come to know had been set in motion and the death of a beloved stranger had been all it took.