#jacob two-two

[punkeropercyjackson]

Nico and Percy

[crimsonender]

Come watch my video about Canadian Cartoons!

[chililizardsplayhouse]

Crappost Skit 1: Roadblocks and Nitroglycerin

(Reference: Atlantis - The Lost Empire)

Carl Fester King:... *is thinking about how to get the massive roadblock out of the way*

Leo Louse: *looks at the massive roadblock in front, and then at Carl Fester King with a devious grin* Too bad we don't have nitroglycerin, eh, King?

Principal Greedyguts: *laughs like a big fat hyena*

Carl Fester King: *grimaces at the thought regarding him getting tricked earlier by Leo and Greedyguts into thinking the water in the canteen was nitroglycerin*

[jacobtwotwooutofcontext]

[fictionalcanadianshowdown]

missed the canadian billboard but i didn't see anyone shoutout jacob two-two which made me sad. that kid sure can say things twice

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[cashcoffeecup]

[tetsunabouquet]

I'm at it again, my obsession with the number 2 has taken over me again (I need to give 2 boops ahead of the boops I have received in number count). This is something I heard the autistic community shares with the OCD community, but some of us will have a fixation with doing something a certain number of times. When I was a kid, I was obsessed with doing everything twice. I needed to do as much as I could double, like tapping something twice or kissing my cats twice in a row. I needed that repetition. And still upon occasion I still feel the urge to do things twice or be two points ahead of my opponents in games. I can't with the number two- To this day, I blame Jacob Two-Two for inspiring that habit in my subconscious.

[themadknightuniverse]

Hunting

[dreadfuldevotee]

14 hapless vampires being led by a vampire with skin darker than yours. What else is there to be scared of?

[recny]

one thing about lestat is that he will never miss an opportunity to caress louis' little chin dimple 🫡

[lizardkingeliot]

I was lost. I was in a dark way.

[fuckmeyer]

the choice between Edward & Jacob is not a question of which relationship is healthier or which partner is best suitable for Bella. neither is correct. neither is best. neither produces a happy ending for Bella. at the end of the day this is still a vampire novel. any choice Bella could make would yield, at best, a bittersweet happily ever after.

if she chooses Edward, she gets the terrifying Breaking Dawn ending: a girl who rejected her call to grow up has hung her love & her eternity on an emotionally stunted partner who hates himself marginally less than he loves her. she's a teen mom with a kid she never wanted who perpetuates the generational trauma passed down from her parents. by keeping this child, the Cullens have set the stage for an uprising/cold war against the Volturi who are likely to take revenge in order to maintain power. Bella is living in a tenuous "dream come true" wrapped in a nightmare & doesn't realize it.

choosing Jacob is the true coming-of-age ending that rips the stitches out of a wound that never fully healed. even if we ignore the fact that she ends up with a man who sexually assaulted her (we must bear in mind Jacob's character is influenced by smeyer's racism, but it did happen), they can't have a secure romantic relationship. based on the high imprinting rate of the pack, Jacob will likely find his imprint in his lifetime & will lose himself to the imprintee. he will no longer be her Jacob. he will inevitably abandon her (whether he wants to or not), & she must reconcile with the reality that she will always be inadequate to Jacob's imprint. & say he never manages to escape the vampires? he will presumably not age for a long time, meaning the relationship Bella always feared with Edward (her being an old grandmother while he stays forever young) remains a possibility. this is the story of a girl who slaps a Band Aid on an open wound & calls herself healed while flinching every time she sees the shadow of the knife that cut her.

if she chooses neither (team therapy), her healing requires her to lose or be at least partially disconnected from everyone she cares about. Bella must spend the rest of her life shut out from one world while never fully existing in her human world ever again. she must always keep secrets. she can never go back home. even in the unlikely event that she manages to escape the Volturi, the threat of being hunted by vampires will never leave her. in addition, she must face her worst fears (aging, losing Edward) while always keeping in mind the immortal life that could have been hers, if only.

even the "healthiest" option produces scars that will never quite heal.

Twilight is a horror. Twilight is a vampire novel. Twilight is gothic. Twilight is fiction. neither Edward nor Jacob is a "bad" choice because neither will give Bella her happily ever after. the choice between Edward & Jacob is simply a matter of which horror story you prefer to read.

[oscpia81]

SALTBURN (2023) dir. Emerald Fennell

[chililizardsplayhouse]

[fishblade-koi]

How to deal with your children's quarrels when it's 7am and you've only had 3hours of sleep ?