#jae chicken little

[schrodingers-hoarding-problem]

Moonlight Chicken Ep. 1

yay! I've finally been able to get around to watching this and so far it does not disappoint

I knew I would like it because I've seen everyone and their mother talking about it & I love a bunch of the actors

but to talk about this first episode, it really focused on setting up the environment & characters in a really well done way. I love the general vibes of the show so so much already

all of the characters seem very interesting (even the ones we haven't gotten to see that much yet) and ofc the acting is amazing (not that I know much about acting, but it's good to me at least)

but a real stand out so far has been the look of the show? like holy shit that color grading?? and the shots? everything just looks so fucking good

im so excited to see more and see how it all develops!

[goldenguillotines]

I do have to say. I don't think I've ever mentioned this but nak has a HUGE control over his undead urges he gets occasionally. He does have them but you wouldn't be able to tell since he's had a hot minute to work on them.. sometimes it's still a lil hard for him but he doesn't let them change how he acts

[jaethecreator]

im officially sick which means im just a baby now and i need someone to take care of me please

[ja3hwa]

♡ 𝐖𝐚𝐬𝐡 𝐈𝐭 𝐀𝐥𝐥 𝐀𝐰𝐚𝐲 | 𝐊.𝐘𝐒 ♡

【Synopsis】 : Anger surged through your lover, and you were the only one who could calm him.

『Word count』 : 1.61k

-> Genre: Smut. Fluff. Little bit of Angst.

Pairing: Sub!Yeosang x SoftDom!Reader

[Warnings] : Tiny bit of self hatred. Swearing. Anger issues. Pet name (Baby boy, Sangie. Baby). Making out. Hickeys. Male whimpering. Hand job. Bathtub sex. Unprotected sex. Multiple orgasms. Crying. Dirty talk.

Networks: @blossomnet @atzhouse

Note: Thank you, @yeosangiess, for this request, I haven't written subby men in a while, so this is refreshing to write, hehe ♡♡

Masterlist | Navigation | By Jae a Ko-Fi ♡

Some of Yeosang’s members swear they saw smoke fuming out of Yeosang’s ears as he left the studio. Even going as far as saying he was leaving footprints of chard wood on the timber floor as he stormed out. The guys had texted you, Hongjoong even went as far as calling you, warning that Yeosang had been pushing himself and that he was very agitated and blowing up at everyone.

You, of course, reassured that you had everything under control and that Yeosang would feel better after some relaxation as you put it. Hongjoong wished you luck saying there was nothing to change your lover's sour mood. But you knew him best. You knew what Sangie needed. So once you hung up, you got to work. Grabbing bath bombs scented in vanilla and berries. Oils and candles alike and some chocolates that you knew he liked. The bath was filled to the brim with bubbles when you were done with it, and you had an order prepared for Yeosang’s favourite fried chicken placed so he could eat something hot when he got out.

You were proud of what you had made. A little safe space for him. And as you lit the last candle, you heard the lock on the front door unlatch, making you aware your partner was home. “Honey! I’ll be out in a second.”

 Yeosang, on the other hand didn’t say anything to your call. Instead, he grumbled, still radiating anger towards himself and the world. Why couldn’t he just get the line right? Why did he have to miss his queue in the choreo every goddamn time? Why the fuck was the buckle on his shirt not opening like he wanted it to. Oh my god, where are the fucking scissors? He basically threw his phone, wallet and keys on the counter before slamming his hands down, giving up on the stupid piece of fabric that held his shirt onto his jacket. He was so tired. Every little thing that could go wrong went wrong. Everything he did was wrong. God why did he have to hate himself.

“Baby…” Your sweet, soft voice called him out of his mind, making him lazily tilt his head over to you. His heart stopped seeing you completely bare of clothing. Only being left in your cute little pink panties he bought you not long ago. He had to gulp, taking in your beautiful figure. Everything about you was perfect. “Come with me…”

He took your hand without hesitation, letting you lead him towards the bathroom without as much as a peep from him. He sighed immediately once the sweet smell of vanilla entered his nose. His eyes closed, taking in the aroma, and while he stood there silently. You slowly undid the belts and loops and zipped off his clothes, slowly stripping him from head to toe. And he let you do it. Taking a moment to give you control. He just wanted you to take it all away. “Join me…” He spoke finally for the first time since coming home.

You give me a small smile, knowing he was going to ask that already. So you give me a little nod, getting in the tub first before letting him take a seat in between your spread legs. You slowly began to wash him, bringing the water to his shoulders, working your thumbs into his tight skin. His groans bounced off the tiled wall of the bathroom, becoming music to your ears. He was finally relaxing, and you were the reason for it. “Tell me what happened.”

You knew talking about it would help him, and deep down, he knew it too. So he began to explain. Explain how he couldn’t seem to do anything right. Now, every little thing got in his way. Heck, even Wooyoung’s laughter itched his brain the wrong way that he ended up yelling at his friend… he felt terrible for that one. “I just feel like… I’m useless. Nothing is going right for me.”

“You’re not useless, Sangie.” Your voice tickled his neck as he snuggled more into your chest with his back flushed against yours.  “You are just having a bad day. Everyone has them.” Your hands glide over his biceps, playing with the bubbles stuck to his soft skin.

“I know...I just…” He didn’t know what he wanted anymore. Did he want to scream? Or was crying a better option? Did he want you to keep rubbing his arms with the gentlest touch, or did he need more… the way your fingers smoothed over skin. How you knew always the right places to touch him. His cock twitched in the water at his thoughts. Growing impatient, the annoyance from today brewing into pure sexual tension.

“What do you need, Sangie?” You asked innocently, having no clue what the bubbles were hiding beneath. Yeosang groaned, tilting his head so his face was now inches from yours. You could see the sparkle in his eyes. The anger that turned to desperation. You suddenly knew what he needed, and with a parted mouth and a whimper, Yeosang answered you.

“P-please…help me.” His soft whine caused a smile to form on your face, locking your lips gently on his. Your hand snaked from his arm to his cock, feeling he had grown harder in every moment. Your fingers wrapped around the shaft giving it a light squeeze, causing Yeosang to bite your lip in a whine. “P-please baby. I n-need it..arghnn.”

Your breath mixed with his as he kept repeating his sweet little ‘pleases’ against your tongue. You started to stroke him, feeling his cock twitch with a delicate touch. “That’s it, baby. Relax let go.” You murmured against his lips, slowly kissing down his cheek and jaw, suckling a big red mark on his collarbone. Yeosang gripped the sides of the tub, saliva painting his plump lips and hiccuped whimpers spilling from him. He felt pure bliss. Finally getting a taste of relaxation as he came all in the water.

“I...I need more… please.” he cried, tears trickling down his hot red cheeks. You shifted, feeling yourself become wet from your lover's little whimpers. You kiss his shoulder before squeezing him tightly, making him throw his head back in a silent scream.

“Do you want to be inside me, baby boy?” You suggested, making his eyes snap open to greet your dark ones.

“Yes, yes. Please, I need it. I want to feel you around me so badly.” You wiped a tear away from his cheek, wetting his cheek with some of the bubbles that clung to your fingertips. You let him go, giving him a moment to breathe, and with no grace, you shifted in the tub until you were sitting on his lap. Yeosang leaned back, his hands still holding the edge of the tub, making his knuckles turn white. “P-please baby. I need you.” He gulps feeling your cunt so close yet so far away from him. He was about to lose his mind if he didn’t feel you right this second.

“It's okay, pretty boy. I’ll give you whatever you need. You want my pussy. All you gotta do is ask.” You kiss his lips tenderly, holding his cheek in your palm. He melted, his hands reaching for your hips desperately. He tugged, needed to feel inside you. He needed to feel your soft velvet walls wrapped around him as if it were the only thing that would keep him alive.

“Please, please, baby. I need your pussy so badly. I think I might explode.” His whimpering words made you chuckle as you lined your aching cunt to his tip. His wide teary eyes stared hopelessly into yours, a twinkle shining in them from the moonlight creeping its way into the steamed room. He held his breath as he felt you take him inch by inch until you completely bottomed him out. “Fffucckkk huhngg.”

“That’s his baby, let go of all that tension.” You rubbed his shoulders as you kissed along his jaw. Yeosang was sobbing quietly at this point on the verge of already emptying his load when you had only just sunk onto him. He needed this. This was what he had been craving. His beautiful precious partner riding him like it was the only thing you both required in life.

“Fuck, I’m sorry. I’m c-coming.” Yeosang cried holding you desperately. His face disappeared into your shoulder as he felt his whole body shake from pleasure. His load quickly filled your insides, making you moan out. Your hips didn’t stop until you knew his high was gone, leaving just a peaceful lingering silence along with the soft heavy beats of two hearts.

“y-you didn’t come..” He hadn't left your shoulder, words mumbling against your skin. You just chuckled, saying it was okay and that he was the priority, but he didn’t take that answer lightly. Pulling you away from him, he held your face between his hands. You could clearly see his tear-stained red cheeks and puffy eyes from your view. Even when he cries, he still looked eternal. “But I wanna make you feel good too baby…”

You grabbed his wrist, kissing each of them softly before chuckling. “I’ll be fine. I feel good, making you feel good. And that’s all that matters right now.” You softly kissed his cheek. “Now relax, we have all night for you to make me cum. But for now, let me look after you, okay?”

Yeosang sighed, letting you carry on with kissing away his pain. And once all the bubbles had popped and the water ran cold, he would whisper, answering you softly…

“okay…”

—

𝐃𝐈𝐒𝐂𝐋𝐀𝐈𝐌𝐄𝐑 : 𝑇𝐻𝐼𝑆 𝐼𝑆 𝐼𝑁 𝑁𝑂 𝑊𝐴𝑌 𝐴 𝑇𝑅𝑈𝐸 𝐷𝐸𝑃𝐼𝐶𝑇𝐼𝑂𝑁 𝑂𝐹 𝑇𝐻𝐸 𝐴𝑇𝐸𝐸𝑍 𝑀𝐸𝑀𝐵𝐸𝑅𝑆. 𝑇𝐻𝐼𝑆 𝐼𝑆 𝑃𝑈𝑅𝐸 𝐹𝐼𝐶𝑇𝐼𝑂𝑁 𝐴𝑁𝐷 𝐼𝑆 𝑁𝑂𝑇 𝑇𝑂 𝐵𝐸 𝑇𝐴𝐾𝐸𝑁 𝑆𝐸𝑅𝐼𝑂𝑈𝑆𝐿𝑌

© 𝐉𝐚𝟑𝐡𝐰𝐚. Do not steal, plagiarise, translate, repost, or use my work in any way, shape, or form.

[boytumms]

Jae Anon again lol. I’ve got too much inspiration. This one comes from a drawing from @drpeppertummy where the giant invites their friend over and the little human can’t eat it all lol.

Enjoy!

~

Liriel tied his hair up into a bun as he stood on the chair, watching as Kelton placed a plate of food in front of him. Liriel’s shoulders were slightly taller than the table. “I hope you like it! I made it with food from my very own farm!” Kelton said happily, placing a straw in the cup for Liriel to reach easier.

“Thank you, I’m sure it’s delicious,” Liriel said, nervously looking at the food. Kelton had even dialed it down with the amount of food, but it still looked like way too much to eat for the small elf.

Nevertheless, Liriel dug in. He didn’t want to make his friend feel bad by not eating the food that was made for him. Liriel ate and ate, ignoring the grumbling protests as his stomach filled up more than it was used to.

“You must be pretty hungry. I can hear your stomach from over here,” Kelton said, laughing as he spoke. Liriel laughed to, trying to make it sound real despite his aching tummy.

The two continued to eat, talking and joking as Liriel’s poor tummy was stretched more and more. Liriel barely managed to finish the fried chicken leg, the grease making his stomach grumble and cramp.

Liriel still had more food to go, but he felt that if much more food was forced into his belly, he was sure to pop. The small elf rubbed his stuffed stomach, being visible as his shirt rested against loosely with little room to spare.

“You haven’t drank much water, do you need some help?” Kelton asked, reaching across the table to tilt the straw down. Liriel only nodded, forcing himself drink some of the water. His belly groaned unhappily, the water mixing in with the rest of the chicken and potatoes.

Liriel looked at the food that still sat on his plate, sighing quietly before he started eating more food. He forced himself to eat until the plate was finished, his belly becoming more and more stuffed with each bite.

Liriel crossed his arms and leaned against the table, breathing heavily as his stuffed belly hung heavily from his small frame. His shirt rested snuggly against his belly, his pants already unbuttoned to allow extra room.

“Are you ready for dessert?” Kelton asked, clearing the table to take the dishes to the kitchen.

“Maybe next time. That was a filling meal,” Liriel huffed, his groaning belly loudly protesting at the thought of more food.

“Oh nonsense! There’s always room for more!” Kelton exclaimed, walking to the kitchen. Liriel thought about leaving while Kelton was gone, but stayed because he didn’t want to be rude.

Liriel watched as Kelton put a small piece of cake in front of the small elf, accompanying it with a cup of soda. Liriel begrudgingly picked up his fork, digging into the strawberry cake. It was good, he admitted that, but he was sure it would taste better under different circumstances.

Liriel sipped some soda here and there, turning his head away to grimace as the bubbly drink messed with his already aching tummy. He slowly ate the sweet, creamy cake, pushing farther and farther as not to offend his giant friend.

When Liriel finally finished the cake, he felt like he was going to throw up. His shirt was already sliding up his rock hard belly, watching as he could see the cramps rolling through his over extended stomach.

Liriel used his hands to apply pressure to help get the bubbles out, hoping for any relief he could get. He was surprised when the straw was pushed into his mouth, looking to see an expecting Kelton. There was still half a glass left, and Liriel didn’t think he could finish it.

He gave it a try anyway, each gulp entering the mixture in his belly. Liriel held his poor belly as he felt it expand with each gulp, the bubbles only adding more pain for his excruciatingly painful stomach.

With a couple gulps left, he felt his belly button pop out. Allowing little room for his expanding stomach. Once he finished, Kelton took the dirty dishes away, allowing Liriel to desperately work at his gurgling mess of a belly.

Liriel managed to get a few small burps out, biting back a few moans of pain as he massaged his stomach. This would take a long time to process, and his stomach was going to give him hell over it.

“So, how was it? Did you like it?” Kelton asked, sitting back in his chair. Liriel pulled the hem of his shirt down, wincing a little as the shirt hugged his giant belly much to tight for his liking.

“It was delicious. I’ll have to come over another time for another meal. Thank you so much for the amazing food. I’ve got to get back now to tend to my farm, but I’ll let you know when I’m available next,” Liriel said, forcing a smile onto his face.

The elf managed to waddle himself down the tiny stairs off the chair and make his way to the door, which was a lot farther for him than the giant. Kelton waited at the door as he opened it for Liriel, paying no mind to the stuffed elf’s belly.

The two said their goodbyes and Liriel continued waddling towards his farm. Kelton could only watch through the window with a smirk, wondering how long it would take to convince Liriel to move in and become his own personal pocket boy.

oh wow I can't believe he managed to finish the whole meal! Poor little thing must have been so swollen after, with a stomach ache to match. Imagine he gets invited over almost weekly, but each time he eats so much food his body cant digest it fast enough to be empty by the time he goes over for dinner. His stomach is constantly stretched and full, and bit by bit it just gets worse each week...

[yueisyum]

Can I ask for a short smut pleaseeeeeee? This is an idea from Jaemin's live. Like he was putting lip balm on you and decided to kiss you to transfer the balm and ended up having a make out session which also ended up having sex hehe.

Woah 😮 that’s actually so cute-

“Hey, y/n,” jaemin calls, he’s sitting right next to you but still out of your line of sight. The hotel has been quiet ever since you too got back from down town. Instead of doing dining crazy, you both decided to sped some quiet time together. you look up from your phone, placing it on the hotel bed, then look up to your boyfriend. You find yourself faced with jaemin, who’s mouth is… shinny? Glossy?

“What the heck is on your face?” You question, your brows wrinkle together and your try not to make such a stank face. he’s been sitting next to you for almost an hour, so your confused as to how he’s done this without you noticing. “I put too much chapstick on, com’er” he quickly explains. he leans in, lips puckered and eyes closed. When he doesn’t feel your lips on his, he peeks and he’s met with your palm. “I can see that, you look like you’ve just eaten a tub full of fried chicken” you giggle.

He rolls his eyes, but you can tell he’s trying not to smile. “Let me give you some-“ he tries to lean in again, but it’s too late, you’ve already decided to mess with him.

“Are you trying to say my lips are dry?” You pout, still avoiding his advances. “Y/n, come here.” He sits up now, climbing over you. “Or is this all an excuse to kiss me?” You turn your head away from him. And you swear you hear a growl leave him. The smug look on your face was unavoidable. “Baby…” he calls, but you don’t dare move. After another moment of him staring daggers into your cheek, he Huffs.

His hand finds your jaw, and turns your head to him, forcefully. But he doesn’t Lean in to kiss you just yet, because your giggling your pretty little head off. So instead, he just smiles. After a moment of your fit, you open your eyes and look at him.

“Are you done?” He asks, a fake annoyed expression on his face. You’d describe it as pouty.

“Mhm” you bite back a smile, allowing your eyes to find his lips. The look you give him, makes him week. “Oh? Now you want me to kiss you? After all that?” He asks playfully. You wanted to keep teasing him, only because he just looks so cute right now.

“Jae… the chapstick is basically on your chin-“

But alas, he wouldn’t let you, instead he connects your lips to his. The chapstick effectively coating your lips.

Phone and chapstick long forgotten, you lean into him, holding his face in your palms. The sudden desperation makes him smile. Grabbing ahold of your thighs and pulling you down the bed a bit. Your head hits the pillow and your back is now fully pressed into the bed instead of the headboard. “Are you in the mood?” He mumbles into you, his hands grabbing at the skin of your upper thigh.

How could you not be in the mood- you’ve been in the mood since he walked out of the bathroom with that stupid tight, black t-shirt, hugging his arms-

“Are you?” You ask, breathlessly when he pulls away. His knees on either side of you, feeling up and down your body. He only laughs at you question, because you already knew the answers. “You think we can skip prep?” He finally asks as he climbs back over you. “Jaemin, lips please!” You whine, he’s used to this behaviour, so he finds his lips back into yours. Earning a satisfied moan from you.

You can hear the handling of his pants buttons, trying to get himself free as fast as possible. Then, to your utter despair, he pulls away. “You want me to eat you out baby?” His tone was flirtation but at a whisper. A dangerous smile on his face. “You already look like you have” you giggle out. Making jaemin deadpan to you. “That’s a no then? Okay” he shrugs, pulling away- teasing you with the same smile as before. But you know he’s trying to hide it. “Guess you’re not in the mood”

You don’t break, not until he begins re-buttoning his jeans.

“Wait!”

“I knew it, my pretty baby wants me and my chapped lips?”

“Don’t ruined it-“

Not proof read. All the other request are long, so I tried to get a quick one out!!

[respectthepetty]

Start watching The Eighth Sense, you won’t regret it I bet. I know if there’s color shenanigans yet bc I’ve been too lost in the sauce regarding everything else in the show (the direction, acting, chemistry, BGM, cinematography, story, VIBES) to pay attention. So far there’s only 2 episodes out, and it looks ridiculously promising!!

@mineonmain, you wanted me to watch the show that begins with this scene accompanied by a heartbeat

Only to slowly disintegrate into this scene with an ambulance siren?

You want me to watch the show that then cuts to Jae Won clearly sitting in a therapist's office next to the fish tank which is going to represent the ocean he probably hasn't been back to since his HEART WAS BROKEN AT THE BEACH?

Cool. Cool cool cool.

Super excited to find out how Jae Won's brother died or disowned him. Even more excited to observe how Jae Won's emotions continue to get masked by different elements in the shot, or how much dark clothing they can put on him compared to Ji Hyun's lighter colors (blue) because everyone needs balance

Glad the baby gay is flexing a little gay muscle with his rainbow light

And super glad this is going to hurt me in a very particular way

Because a show sponsored by IKEA and energy drinks can only cause me unimaginable mental damage, no?

And a show produced by a company with "moonlight" in its name will hurt me regardless if it has a happy ending or not because historically, queer media associated with moonlight, like 2016's Moonlight and 2023's Moonlight Chicken, will always strive for maximum emotional angst.

Thrilled that you recommended this.

Ecstatic.

[jae-bummer]

My Idol 3: Part Six

My Idol From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

My Idol is a South Korean competitive reality dating game show. It currently airs on Saturday nights on Jae-bummer’s blog. First broadcast in 2016, the show offers the opportunity for a lucky fan to go on seven blind dates with seven idols. The idol plans the date with the show throwing in a specific mission to complete during the day. At the end of the initial dates, the show opens up an audience vote to decide what four idols will move on to the second date.

My Idol 3: The Series

.

Taking your hand gingerly into his, San gave you a questioning smile. It was difficult to describe the vibe he gave off, but you knew it was a good one. Looking down at your now intertwined fingers, you looked up again and gave a small nod of permission. This set his grin even wider as he looked from you and out to the grassy park you were walking across.

"I know it's kind of cliche," he began, his voice startlingly deep for his appearance. "Dates on the Han River...but I think you'll learn that I like cliches when it comes to romance."

"Oh yeah?" you chuckled, enjoying the feel of the sun on your face after being locked inside the hotel for so long. "Why's that?"

"I guess I've always daydreamed about love in a movie type way," he nodded. "Grand gestures and quiet, comfortable moments in between. Nothing has to be rushed when it's someone you really care about."

"You sound like a hopeless romantic," you hummed.

"I guess you're right," he chuckled. "Not like I can afford to be."

"Why not?" you asked, narrowing your eyes toward him.

After a pause, he began slowly. "It's better to choose my fans over romance. When I picked my profession, I knew I'd be making that decision."

Glancing over your shoulder at the cameras following you, you could only sigh. While the show gave ample opportunities to know quite a few wonderful guys, you often forgot how careful they had to be. One wrong comment and their career could be tainted.

Which made you wonder, of course fans were angry that their idols were dating through this program (your apartment was enough to confirm that) but it left you curious of the thoughts of other fans. Often negative opinions were the loudest, but you wanted to know the ones who recognized that their idols would have lives outside of their career.

Treading carefully, you asked. "What about this show? What do you think your fans would think of you making an appearance?"

San's eyes shot toward yours, then roamed around your face as he thought. "I think Atiny know that we will always be theirs, even when we're someone else's. And they're generous enough to know that we deserve all different types of love. At least I hope they do."

"It sounds like you have a very kind and wise fandom," you grinned encouragingly.

The tension that had slowly began to build in San's shoulders dropped a bit. "We have the best fans in the world."

Pulling you to a stop in front of the pop up tent you had seen earlier, he motioned to it. "This is our little hide out for the afternoon."

Breathing out a laugh through your nose, you were hit with how cute the set up was. It was growing increasingly clear that San had very definitively set this whole thing up. It had the touch of a guy just trying to do his best.

The inside of the tent looked very similar to a nest. Blankets, pillows, and an alarming amount of plushies were tossed into the small space. Battery-operated fairy lights were woven alone the inside of the tent, rather haphazardly, but as you looked closer, each little light proved to be a tiny flower. Toward the entrance of the tent, there were several boxes of chicken and a few frozen drinks. The stereotypical Han river date set up and ready.

"Did you do all this?" you laughed, ducking your head to see into the tent better.

San looked to his shoes, the tips of his ears slowly turning red. "My manager and I came out really early to pick the best spot. I brought blankets for when the sun starts to go down. I wasn't sure if you were a naturally warm or cold person, so I didn't want to risk it if you didn't bring a jacket. The plushies are all from my place...it's nice to have something to snuggle. And chicken because...well, that's what you do at the Han river."

"It's perfect," you said quietly, looking back up to find him staring at you.

"Really?" he asked, his eyes wide. A smile split his face as you could see pride take hold. "I was worried it'd be too cheesy. I know that it wasn't a very unique idea and in past seasons there were all these grand gestures..."

"I don't need grand gestures," you affirmed. "Remember when you were talking about the comfortable moments in between? That's what I want."

As you said it, you were mildly pleased to find yourself believing it. Your dates this season weren't over the top or adrenaline inducing, but every day moments you realized these idols didn't often get. You were already stressed enough with the mere idea of dating these impossibly unattainable people, let alone with the addition of fearing for your life after the break in. You liked that Jungkook, Hongseok, and San's date ideas were outrageously normal. When you thought of celebrity, you thought of someone trying to showboat or prove their worth. These men had just been humble and worried if you were going to have a good time.

"We shouldn't let the food get cold," San said, clearly pleased with your response. Helping you down, he chuckled as you plopped into the entrance of the tent and began to settle yourself in. He followed suit, groaning as he eased down beside you. Knees and shoulders jostling yours, you hadn't realized just how wide he was.

Digging around in the tent behind him, he pulled out a small, wooden tray and placed it in front of the two of you. After handing you a drink, he began to pull out the various dishes. They all looked delicious, and a few were even still steaming hot.

"I had my manager run out when they said you were on your way," he grinned, noting the look of surprise on your face. "I don't mind lukewarm food, but you deserve better."

"I don't mind it either," you laughed. "But I appreciate your consideration."

Pulling a blanket over his lap and offering up the other side to you, you nestled beside your date and started to eat.

Chewing in silence, you tried to assess San without clearly staring. His looks were fierce, his features almost feline. Sharp eyes, high cheekbones, and a defined jaw were all enough to make you swoon. That, added to the constant upward curve of his soft lips and catoonish twinkling in his eyes (you weren't lying, his eyes actually twinkled) was almost too much. You knew you would be dating men who were the pinnacle of beauty, but it was simply unfair that they had nice personalities as well.

"So what about you?" San asked, startling you out of your silence. Mid-bite of chicken, he looked toward you inquisitively.

"Was I not listening or did you leave out the first part of your question?" you laughed.

"Sorry," he squeaked, bowing his head in embarrassment. "Sometimes I get caught up in my own thoughts and verbalize it midway through."

"We all have our quirks," you hummed, taking a long sip of your drink. "What am I answering?"

"I was thinking about earlier, when you called me out as being a hopeless romantic," he began.

"I didn't have to call out anything," you chuckled. "You were making it abundantly clear."

"While that may be true!" he accepted. "I was wondering if you considered yourself to be the same?"

"A hopeless romantic?" you pondered. "I guess to some extent."

San tilted his head, waiting quietly for you to continue.

"I may be too much of a realist to be a complete hopeless romantic," you sighed. "I really like the idea though."

San lifted his brows, still waiting.

"Everyone wants their magical fairy tale, in whatever form it takes for them," you said, finally giving up and deciding to fully explain. "Of course I've had dreams since I was a kid of being swept off of my feet by a savior, someone who could protect me. Life was rough and I was far too sensitive for a lot of things I faced. Even when I thought I was tough, my insides were like tofu. That being said, I have to be realistic. Not everything is going to be exactly like those dreams I fantasized about."

"Why not?"

"What?" you asked, caught off guard.

"Why can't everything be like your dreams?"

"I think all of our dreams end up being watered down versions of what we first imagined," you sighed. "I sound terribly cynical right now, don't I?"

"When life is hard, it makes us a cynic," he said. Patting your knee lightly, he smiled sadly. "But I don't think that means you should settle."

"If I don't settle, I may not end up with anything," you laughed.

"And would that really be all that bad?" he asked. "Ending up with nothing or being constantly disappointed every day?"

You hated that there was a note of truth to what he was saying. You assumed as an idol, that feeling of loneliness wasn't foreign at all. Ending up with nothing was almost the norm.

"But you'll find what you deserve, little dubu," he nodded, taking another bite of chicken.

You wrinkled your nose, immediately recognizing the word "dubu" as the Korean word for tofu.

"Did I just unintentionally help you to create a nickname for me?" you wondered out loud.

"I love tofu," he smiled innocently. "I'll even let you call me Mountain in return."

That made sense seeing as how "san" literally translated to Mountain.

"Tofu and Mountain," you hummed. "Quite the pair, aren't we?"

"The mountain will protect his little tofu," he teased. "And make all of their dreams come true."

"That's an awfully high bar to set for yourself," you said, shaking your head. He was precious.

"What's the point of setting a bar if it's not high?" he chimed.

The two of you continued your small talk as you watched other couples and families strolling along the river. Things were surprisingly cozy with San. When you had first shown up for your date, you were off the charts with nerves, but he had seemed to calm you down instantly. It was easy to forget about all of the other terrible things going on when he was your buffer to the world.

"Mission," a voice grunted just as you had forgotten that a mission existed at all.

"Ah," San hissed. "I was waiting for this."

"It's no big deal," you nodded confidently. You hadn't failed a challenge yet.

"You're due for a penalty," he grimaced. "I've seen the other episodes. You passed with flying colors before. Probability is not on our side."

"Now look who's being a cynic," you said, sticking your tongue out at San. Reaching over and grabbing the red envelope from one of the producers, you settled into your spot again. "Should you do the honors?"

"I guess," he grumbled, gently taking the envelope from your hands. Ripping it down the side, he slid a thick piece of paper out. Reading it once, then twice, he looked up with wide eyes.

"That bad?" you croaked.

"A Bicycle Made for Two: Pick up your tandem bike and ride it 400 meters without stopping."

"400 meters?" you groaned. "I can't ride a normal bike that well."

"No stopping?" San asked, quirking a brow. "What if someone steps in the way?"

"We have the sidewalk blocked off," one of the producers confirmed. "Safety precaution."

Right.

"Well," San muttered, pulling himself to a standing position. He offered you a hand. "How's your balance?"

.

"It's going to be okay," San assured, clicking the strap to the helmet closed under your chin.

You weren't sure which had your heart going more quickly, the task at hand or his face so close to yours.

"Worse comes to worse, we do the stupid penalty," you sigh.

"We've got this," San said, leaning forward and tapping his helmet lightly against yours. The small gesture was enough to fill your chest with warmth even though you very much did not have this.

San opted to take the front part of the bike, as he was obviously more athletic and likely had better reflexes than yours. Settling in behind him, you clutched at the small handles and tried to swallow down the potential for anxiety vomit.

"Put your foot on the right pedal," San instructed, taking control of the situation. "On the count of three, we'll kick off with our left foot and start going. Sound good?"

"Good," you chirped, but you were lying. Nothing about the situation sounded particularly good.

"One, two," he said cheerfully. "Three!"

Doing as San had instructed, you kicked off with your left foot and began to push yourself forward. Surprisingly, the movement was synchronized enough to get the two of you moving forward. Letting out a chuckle of relief, you basked in the small win. Now you just had to worry about staying on for 400 meters.

"How you doing back there?" San asked, calling over his shoulder. You looked up to see his wide shoulders in front of you, flexed as his arms gripped the handlebars in front of him. It was honestly delicious.

"Still alive!" you called back. Watching yourselves move steadily along the sidewalk was almost intoxicating. You were really doing it.

Looking back toward the park area, you couldn't help but notice the fans that had accumulated at the barricades security had set up. That feeling of success was instantly snuffed out by the fear of the unknown.

"San," you said, trying to tamper down the whine in your voice. "There's so many people."

"It's okay," he said, having to shout to be heard (which unfortunately nullified the comforting effect you knew he was going for).

"San," you tried again, growing increasingly wary of a large throng of fans ahead of you. "San, I don't feel comfortable."

"What?" he asked, looking over his shoulder again in an attempt to get a clear line of contact in the precarious situation.

"San!" you gasped, finally halting your peddling as you saw a figure approaching the two of you. A girl seemed to have broken through the barrier and had begun sprinting in your direction.

San directed his focus to where you were pointing and let out a shout of alarm. The back of the bike began to fishtail as you had stopped peddling, but San was trying to get ahead of the fan. You attempted to find your footing again, but were failing miserably as the pedals circled faster and faster.

Just as you thought you would be intercepted by the unknown girl, your security guard, Hyuk came out of no where. Taking the fan roughly to the ground just in front of you, you let out a cry. San had over-corrected to avoid the altercation and was sending the bike toward the railing separating the sidewalk from the river.

Slamming the front tire into the guard rail, San flew off the side of the bike and toward the ground. With your position, you were lucky enough to slide off of the back, quickly catching yourself with little effort. Your hands instantly began to fidget at your helmet, desperate to fling it off.

That was when you began to focus on the scene around you. San was on the ground, unmoving.

"San!" you gasped, forgetting about your helmet struggle and rushing over to him.

"I'm okay," he grumbled with a wince. He was laying face down, his arms pinned beneath him, having failed to catch himself in time.

"Let's get you up," you said quietly, lightly grabbing his shoulder closest to you. You could hear his stuttered breathing as he attempted to push himself away from the ground, but ultimately let out a loud groan as he flopped down again.

"What?" you gasped, pulling your hands away. You didn't want to add any unnecessary pain.

"My wrist," he whined. Furrowing his brows again, he began to push himself up with only one hand. Coming to a sitting position, he looked toward you with a frown. You crouched in front of him and began to analyze the arm in question.

You hoped it wasn't a break, but something was definitely wrong. The area was already swollen and red with irritation.

"Come here," you said quietly, trying to fight the tears threatening of spilling over. You quickly freed him of his helmet and suppressed the urge to wrap him in a hug.

"Medic!" one of the producers shouted over the chaos. "We need a medic!"

..

"Really screwed that one up, didn't I?" San laughed bitterly. He was safely settled in the back of the My Idol SUV, a blanket wrapped around his shoulders.

"There was no good way for that to end," Hyuk grumbled from the seat in front of you, flexing his own hand. When he had tackled the girl, the medic was pretty certain he had broken a few fingers.

"We're honestly lucky that it wasn't worse," you said, gnawing on your lip. You were huddled beside your date, a light hand placed on his knee. For whatever reason, you felt responsible for this.

"At least it's just a sprain," San nodded, flexing his fingers now wrapped in bandages. "I can work with a sprain."

"I'm so sorry this happened," you sighed. "Things were going so well."

"You can't help third parties trying to sabotage the situation," Hyuk continued, his voice deadpanned.

"I just can't believe a fan would do that," San clucked, shaking his head. "And don't apologize, dubu. None of this was your fault."

Sure, it wasn't. But what if someone breaking into your apartment was making fans more bold? What if things were only going to get worse? You couldn't mentally handle the burden of innocent people getting caught in the crossfire.

"Hey," San said quietly, breaking through your thoughts. "Look at me."

You begrudgingly glanced up into San's smiling eyes.

"I'm okay."

"I know, but-"

"No," he chuckled, shaking his head. "No "buts." I may not be 100%, but I am close. What happened today sucked, but it didn't take back the moments I got to share with you."

"You're just saying that because you have to," you grumbled.

"Who says I have to?" he asked indignantly. "We're not being filmed anymore, right?"

"Well, yeah," you pouted, crossing your arms.

This caused San to laugh and shake his head. Reaching for the hand you had taken from his knee, he pulled it back toward him and interlaced your fingers. "You're so cute."

"Mmm," you scoffed.

San played with your palm, waiting patiently for you to sort through the thoughts tornado-ing around your head. Finally, you looked toward him and tried to control the tears accumulating on your lash line. "I was scared."

"Dubu," he cooed, opening his blanket and pulling you in close. "I know. I was scared too."

You sniffed despite yourself. "Did you really have a good time?"

"I did," he nodded happily. "We got through that little hiccup. It'll be smooth sailing from here on out."

"Right," you muttered. "Now you get to be locked in a hotel room for the next few weeks. When you finally get a taste of freedom, you get to look forward to being told if the audience thinks we deserve to see each other again."

"Even if they don't," he hummed. "I'll see you again some time. Even if it's just as a friend. The mountain will always protect his dubu."

"Saaaan," you groaned, both loving and hating the nickname he created.

"That's Mountain to you," he chuckled.

Crinkling your nose, your eyes found his. He had such a pure and genuine expression on his face, it was hard to think that anything could have went wrong today.

Being in such close proximity, it was easy to notice the small motion of him licking his lips. You zeroed in on his mouth, instantly regretting it as he smirked. "I don't kiss on a first date."

"I didn't - I wasn't," you stuttered.

His smirk grew into a full grin as he reached up with his bandaged hand and lightly cradled your jaw. You didn't think you were even breathing as he slowly leaned down...

...and rubbed his nose gently back and forth against yours.

Pulling away again, he smiled. "Next time..."

[waitmyturtles]

Fuck. I have more on The Eighth Sense. (I’m gonna get all Moonlight Chicken-meta on this show!) (First big meta here.)

1) I loved the scene in episode 6 of the two guys having roadside snacks at the rest stop. There was a LOT going on in those scenes at that stop, but I particularly liked their conversation on the bench, because it indicated a lot of the pressures that Jae Won faces. Lines like: “We are always living in other’s [sic] frameworks in this world.” “Don’t try to get out of the box.”

And then Ji Hyun takes a bite of the sausage-and-rice-cake skewer, the very food they were criticizing a moment before as being stereotypical of that “box,” and clearly enjoys it. 

What does that say to me? It says to me that Jae Won is putting a lot of WORK to be IN the box that I think he’s in -- the chaebol-influenced box that his life is being directed towards. That pressure is driving him so insane that, again, I think he’s having dissociations because of that pressure. 

But I love how gently this scene indicates that pressure, that reality that Jae Won is burdened under. And that at this moment, he has no choice but to live in the box. And pretend to enjoy it.

2) And (eff Viki for not allowing screenshots), please enjoy this shitty-ass photo (lol) of the bench the guys are sitting on, because I think that this bench shot was brilliantly done.

That ghostly person always by Jae Won’s side. 

3) The man operating the roadside stand. Giving things away to the two guys because he thought they were cute. 

I wish I could parse more the meaning of the trot soundtrack that the guys were given. I know very little about trot, except that it’s considered in many ways, “old folks” music, although there are many new artists today who are popular trot singers. I wonder if the trot soundtrack is meant to indicate to the guys a remembrance of happier times.

And the roadside guy himself. He also serves as evidence (to me, at least) that the entire episode was a dissociative experience, becauuuussee: call me a cheap auntie, but what’s this guy doing, giving stuff away?! Lol. Fireworks are expensive!

But also. I got this feeling (PLEASE feel free to NOT roll with me on this one, because it was ONLY a fleeting thought) that maybe that guy was meant to be a reflection of Jae Won’s father, IF Jae Won’s dad accepted him for who he was. (THIS IS ONLY A FLEETING THOUGHT, NOT EVEN A THEORY -- just something that popped in my head as I was watching the episode. Don’t quote me on this one! I don’t think Jae Won’s dad would give away free fireworks, lol!)

Why did I think that? The guy had no reaction when Jae Won said he was traveling with his “boyfriend.” It made me wonder that Jae Won wanted to live in a world where he could say that so easily. That he could speak to people, to older men in his life, who would accept Jae Won for who he was/is as a queer man. 

4) Last thought. I don’t know the reality of Ji Hyun being a part of the Sea Cadets, but something that REALLY worried me in the first episode was Joon Pyo saying to Ji Hyun, upon peeping the Surf Club’s website on Ji Hyun’s computer — that Ji Hyun couldn’t swim.

If Ji Hyun had been a part of a school team called the Sea Cadets that exposed him to the ocean, then… okay. But that was revealed in what I think was the dissociative episode 6.

So I feel like I can only go by what Joon Pyo said in episode 1, and think that Ji Hyun isn’t familiar with ocean swimming.

I surfed for like, a mini-season once in my twenties (it was RADDDDDD, but expensive, and I am not a morning person to get up so early to catch waves). (But I highly recommend trying it, because catching a wave even on a longboard can be such a high.)

Anyway, during that time, I basically only swam and lifted weights to train. I can’t quite remember the rule of thumb for how many meters you needed to be able to swim in a certain amount of time to be considered a safe surfer, but I know I had to practice for a solid week, every day, to get to that goal, because I didn’t swim regularly before then. And then I spent the summer only swimming as cardio. Surfing — with all the paddling out, the fight against the waves as you paddle out, the balancing on your board as you wait for a wave to come in — is EXHAUSTING. You burn maaaajor calories with surfing and training. (Jae Won not being hungry for ramen after that first session is suspicious.)

Not a single surf instructor in the world would let someone who couldn’t swim anywhere near the longest longboard you could find. An instructor wouldn’t let a non-swimmer surf on a fucking mattress. At least, the instructors I knew back in mah day. I don’t know how it is now, if you were to take lessons at like, a resort. But I know I couldn’t have hired a teacher back then if I couldn’t swim.

One rule you have to learn is how to dismount the board when you wash out — the boys do it correctly on the show, you kind of tuck in and jump off the side with your butt splashing down first.

But anything can happen. A common occurrence is you washing out first, with your board flying above you (it’s connected to your ankle, so it’s bound to slam down near you), and possibly smashing the top of your head.

So putting all of this together: if Ji Hyun did indeed drown? It may have been because he didn’t have the strong swimming skills he needed to surf properly. It’s interesting that we didn’t see the Surf Club vet for that prior to the first surf trip. And I gently wonder, if anything happens to Ji Hyun in the “reality” part of the show, if Jae Won blames himself for not knowing that Ji Hyun might not be able to swim.

Damn. This show is doing it to me. GAAAAAHHHH. @lurkingshan​.... you were so right about this show.

[ratcatcher0325]

A Fraction of Justice (Chapter #28)

Alexander is back and he's ready for.... napping. No, no this chapter is interesting, I swear.

Chapter #28. Alexander wakes up from his nap but has a much harder time getting Nat to come to from hers. How will he solve this problem? You guessed it. Through rage and yelling.

Previous: Chapter #27

Next: Chapter #29

Word Count: 6,603 Read Time: Approx. 51 mins

CW: adult language, angst, allusions to medical abuse

Tag list: @gatlily @patrocolus3 @beautifulunknowntrash @titan-god-420 @andraimeide @themarlo @cup-o-chai @lucentbliss @raccoontoaster @tolsizedlove @not-a-space-alien , @thegodmother007 , @honey-olive , @bittykimmy13 , @aceouttatime , @imvenusasaboy , @liminaldaze , @windshield-patent , @joxter-coded , @rosella35 , @narrans , @rubeau-art , @littlescaryinternetguy , @jae-from-discord , @kitn-underfoot , @secretly-small @writing-forever , @iinogongju , @tales-of-aestus-deactivated2023 , @itsgothgirlthyme , @make-me-giant , @reborrowing , @whatthisfemsheplikes , @soapysoap69

Btw, DM me if you wanna be added to the tag list!

___________________________________

A Fraction of Justice

Chapter #28: Rosemary for Remembrance

[Natalie’s POV]

My heart leapt in my chest as I looked over what I’d carefully crafted. Balanced delicately on the aluminum lid of a mason jar, which served as a tray of sorts, was a tiny place setting, complete with a dish I could balance on my pointer finger, a miniature glass of water with a few drops filling it to the brim, a mug of tea, and teeny tiny little utensils, small enough that I had to press the tip of my finger into them to pick them up. Piled high on the plate was a simple, very finely diced, medley of chicken and peppers over an adorably small bed of quinoa. Simple, yet filling and wonderfully displayed in perfect, proportionate miniature just for him. I couldn’t wait to see the look on his face when I revealed it to him. I delicately placed a paper napkin over the top of it all and laid the whole thing in the flat of my hand. 

Picking up my own plate, I padded down the hallway, almost giddy like a little kid. I couldn’t deny, it hurt when he’d thrown his little fit about the clothes. I’d been excited for them, how could I have possibly known he expected to dress like freakin Downton Abbey every day? I couldn’t help rolling my eyes as a smile curved my lips, in spite of myself: what a little mess he was. But hey, for all his fussing about clothing, maybe I’d be able to make it up to him with a warm meal. He must’ve been starving at this point. 

I paged the door with my side as I slipped into the room, biting my lip to keep from beaming. I’d just opened my mouth to announce that dinner was served when I laid eyes on him. 

Instead of finding him fidgeting impatiently in his little desk chair or pouting with his arms crossed on the edge of the bed, face flushed from the horrors of being forced to dress casually, he was fast asleep, splayed out on the right side of his tiny mattress. My heart melted. 

I gently laid out two very differently sized place settings down on the surface of the vanity, carefully balancing the mason jar ‘tray’ on his little desktop. With one sweeping motion, I made sure the thin napkin stayed in its place, serving as an extremely low budget cloche. 

Once all was settled, I turned my eager attention to the sleepy little life below me. His deep slumbering breaths caused his chest to rise and fall to the rhythm of his slowed heart. I felt a thrilling tingle trace my spine as I noticed what covered that tiny beating breast: crimson letters each no bigger than 8-point font. I’d secretly hoped his keen eyes would spot what I’d purchased especially for him. Smart little thing. If anyone deserves a free ride to Harvard, it’s you. 

His right hand lay slack over his abdomen, rising and falling with the air in his lungs. His injured leg was splayed straight out, while his left was bent, tucked beneath his hurt knee. His left hand had fallen limply at his side, just barely balancing on the edge of the mattress. I don’t know why, but the detail of seeing his tiny head, usually all full of blustering anger and intellectual fervor in his waking hours, resting on a tiny pillow, almost overwhelmed me. It delighted me to no end to see him interacting with furniture that fit him. For a moment, if I squinted my eyes, I could imagine my perspective was just an aerial shot in a movie and the little man before me wasn’t tiny at all, but belonged perfectly to a world that matched his proportions. I suppose he’d dreamt of such an impossible fantasy quite often.

Hello there, Alexander. I propped my head on my elbow and took in the mesmerizing sight of the man who could fit in the palm of my hand. Dinner could wait a minute… or thirty.

There was something wonderful about watching him in this moment of total tranquility, it was like a window into a future where he felt safe and satisfied. Poor little man, even without knowledge of all the details, I could tell he’d had a hard and painful life. I could imagine pretty much everyone at his size had. They were so vulnerable, after all. Looking at his bandaged leg, I was reminded that despite all his boisterousness and snapping, he was actually quite a fragile little being. It was easy to forget sometimes. He put so much effort into tricking you into thinking the opposite, after all.

I knew he was utterly wiped. Especially after all the melodrama in the bath. He deserved to sleep peacefully, knowing no one would ever dream of hurting him again. Not on my watch. As long as he’d let me, I’d be more than happy to do everything in my power to give him that peace of mind. 

A pang of guilt rushed through me as a biting, critical thought burned through my cortex, searing the edges of my amygdala (did I remember Psych 101 well enough to get that right?). Despite my genuine desire to keep him safe, I’d hand-delivered him to hell on earth, myself. He couldn’t recall the details yet, but I believed him when he said they’d been cruel. I felt the burning sensation cut through my chest. Would I ever be able to make up for what I’d done? Or would he want nothing to do with me the second he could stand on his own two feet? Could I even give him what he needed to be happy if he could stomach the idea of staying with me?

Just then, he twitched in his sleep. It was nothing more than a microscopic little clenching of his fist and twitch of his brow as he pursed his tiny lips, still, I felt my heart skip a beat. Enough agonizing over the future, all I could do right now was relish in this precious moment. He was with me for now, and maybe that was enough. Not only that, but he was safe, comfortable and relaxed. That’s all I wanted for him. 

Staring down at his little form, practically sinking into the surface of the mattress, I felt a tingling sensation run the length of my spine. Would this ever get old? I couldn’t imagine it would. The only thing that could possibly make this better is if it was my hand that held his limp little body aloft as I felt him twitch against the surface of my palm. Blood rushed to my cheeks just thinking about what a precious gift it was to get to hold him while he slept. I didn’t think I’d ever forget how that felt, even if I wanted to (not that I ever would). And he’d looked me directly in the eyes and requested it from me! He saw me, at least for that one moment, as a safe place to rest his head. All I wanted was to be deserving of that trust. I was painfully aware I had a long road ahead of me for that. 

I shook my head, banishing the guilt again. Present moment, Nat. I reached for my phone and flipped on the camera. If I wanted to stay focused on the gift of this precious instant, I supposed it could last a lot longer if I captured it in a photo. 

Making sure the flash and shutter sound were off, I aimed the camera at his little sleeping form, delighted that all of him fit easily in the frame, and took the picture. There, now when you’re pissing me off I can remember that sometimes you’re actually pretty cute. Granted, it’s only when you’re unconscious, but, we’ve gotta start somewhere don’t we? I couldn’t help but smirk. He was such a handful, this angry little spitfire, but he was also the best thing that could’ve happened to me. Who else was gonna drag me kicking and screaming through my last semester, and guilt me into cleaning to boot? Not to mention being the perfect pocket-sized, taste-tester for all my recipes. I knew he meant a thousand times more than all that, but I blushed to even think of those things.

I could stay here and stare at him adoringly for hours and not even feel the time go by, but he deserved to rest as long as he wished without me accidentally waking him. Poor thing, I imagined it’d be kinda terrifying to wake up with someone gigantic just looming directly overhead. I needed to give him his space. 

Reluctant to let go, I sighed, settling on the edge of my bed, as close to his little sleeping form as I could get, resting my head at the foot of the mattress, so my gaze lined up directly with where he lay. If he needed anything I’d be close at hand. Sweet dreams, Alexander, I’ll be right here when you wake. 

Much more quickly than I expected, I found my eyelids getting impossibly heavy as my breathing lagged and sleep claimed my mind and body. I’d forgotten how little rest I’d had today. It felt good to drift off into oblivion, knowing that tiny life, only an arm’s length away, was safe and sound. 

******

My sleep was blissful and dreamless for a while, my body sinking into the surface of the mattress... My mattress. I desperately needed the rest, it was evident by how quickly I’d fallen asleep in the first place. I was warm, safe, and the aching pain in my joints faded with my consciousness. My body craved a moment to recover, that much was clear, and it was a delight to be able to give myself that gift. 

But, as my breathing slowed to a deep, dull cascade, and my muscles melted into the fabric, releasing every fiber of tension into the forces of gravity, the ghost of an image began to form in my mind’s eye. 

It was hazy at first, like the tendrils of silvery smoke in the split second after a flame has been extinguished, flashing in and out of sight as it dissolves into an inky black void. 

I saw something electric blue, hurtling toward me, massive, forceful, frightening. Its surface undulating with strange lines and shadows. I wanted to run, to yell and fight, but I was rooted to the spot, unable to move a muscle. Another appeared, and another and another. As if emerging from the very pitch blackness of my subconscious. They were wrinkled, undulating, living. 

My head spun and a bad taste rose in my throat like bile, but stinging, my lips and tongue abuzz with the sensation, as one of those tendrils slammed into my chest, pinning me like some prized butterfly in a case, unable to escape the possessive gaze of all who looked upon me. These blue things were fingers. Fingers attached to a human hand. This was not a fantastical nightmare, but a memory. 

Another one, thick, strong, in no way holding back its immense strength against my fragile frame, pressed into the soft flesh of my throat, tipping my head upwards, while others suspended the motion of my wrists and ankles. Truly like a bug on display, all pinioned and poised. In the distance, my ringing ears could make out voices, rumbling with the thunder of a burgeoning storm: one male, one female, like boisterous claps of thunder, terrifyingly loud yet impossible to discern, at least not in this fever dream of a memory. I watched in helpless horror as something cold, and biting slid into my arm. A needle as thick around as my littlest finger, the liquid burning as it entered my veins. 

Don’t fall asleep. Just don’t fall asleep. You must fight. You can’t let them win. The wind rushed from my lungs as I was lifted again, head lolling as the drugs began to take hold. No wonder I’d struggled to remember this… I’d been utterly intoxicated! If they wanted a more pliable plaything, they certainly had one now, these monsters. They were faceless, nameless entities of evil who delighted in nothing more than torturing me simply because they had the power to do so. I felt an insatiable urge to cry and scream all at once. 

But as I was picked up against my will, in my final moments of lucidity, I’d managed to throw my gaze down far below. Just what had I seen there? I knew it was important by the way I could feel my heart thundering away at the mere thought. 

Yet, as I anticipated the most pivotal moment in my waking nightmare, the image was growing hazy, the smoke of this ephemeral ghost-like memory was starting to burn itself out. 

No! No, not now! Please not now. I must remember… 

I willed the images back from the void of my exhausted brain. Black uniform lines on white, as crisp and pristine as a raven’s feather on new fallen snow, began to materialize. The type font, militant in its precision, seemed to repeat endlessly in an upside down sea of useless text. I’d been well on the way to passing out by this point. It was entirely possible the anesthesia had erased these final moments from my mind. 

I refused to accept that as a possibility. Think, Alexander! The rumbling, gruff and ever irritated voice of my sometimes caretaker, sometimes torturer entered my mind, as I recalled the many times he berated me for misquoting a Latin verse of Homer by a single mis-conjugated verb, “Make use of that little engine between your ears… think! It’s the one thing I shouldn’t be forced to do for you!” 

I strained to turn the infinite lines of ink, which seemed to be shrinking more and more as I was pulled farther and farther away, into meaning. And that’s when, as if bending to my force of will… I remembered precisely what I’d managed to read in a panic before succumbing to their methods to pacify me. 

I shot up, with a cry, body soaked in a cold sweat. All the pain that had faded with sleep now coursed through my spinal cord, lighting up my neurons as I couldn’t help but wince. Light tortured my eyes for a moment, before I was able to take in the world around me. I was still in my bed, still on Natalie’s dresser, and still safe from the nightmare I’d just relived. My chest was heaving as my fists clutched the sheets and I struggled to breathe. Yet, right in front of me, something was quite different. 

Instead of the barren, unmade bed with its sea of tossed sheets, a woman, a mess of curls obscuring part of her face, occupied my view, fast asleep and heedless of my tortured dreams and frightened waking. That woman, who’s fingertips had become more familiar with my body than any other set of human hands, lay on the very edge of her bed, her head resting at the foot of the mattress. She’d arranged herself in a rather unorthodox way… Why? Her positioning seemed neither comfortable nor practical. Had she been so exhausted she just passed out like that? I supposed I wasn’t in a position to judge, I’d essentially done the same thing.

I admit, it was a bit of a blow to my pride that even my anguished cry as I woke from a bad dream was too tiny and unremarkable to stir the human before me. She was fast asleep as I looked on, my blood thrumming though my veins and pounding in my head as my breath came in broken hitches. She was the picture of perfect stillness while my body trembled with anticipation. I’d remembered! Finally, I knew, in excruciating detail, what they’d done to me. 

I watched her with hawklike precision, her breath heavy like a rolling, lazy tide. I leaned forward, speaking with a sharp whisper, “Hey! Natalie…” the tide rolled in and out, unburdened by me. I felt a tightening in my chest as I tried again, “Natalie! Wake up!” Nothing. Dammit, really?? I cupped my hands and gave a shout across the vast cavern of space that in reality was only maybe three or four feet across, “NATALIE!!” She didn’t even flinch, her breathing deep and unencumbered. 

Fired up now, and without a moment’s hesitation, I leaned over the bedside and clutched a scrap of brown packing paper from the floor below. It came as no surprise that it lay precisely where it had fallen: of course, she couldn’t be at all bothered to put anything away in a neat or orderly manner. Her lack of cleanliness now came to my aide, as I ripped off a piece, and crumpled it into a ball only a bit larger than my fist.  I took aim and fired. It fell short. 

Damn my little frame! 

My face flushed hot with anger as I fashioned another projectile and tried again. This one hit its mark, glancing off her forearm, which cradled her head. My celebration was short lived, however, as I watched her twitch slightly and then nestle further into the crook of her arm, mumbling slightly. 

Wake up already, you giant indolent fool! I’m at the absolute limit of my patience! 

In a flurry of motion, I made several more projectiles and began lobbing them as hard as I could. The first glanced her cheek, the next nestled in her hair, but the third smacked her right between the eyes. 

Bullseye! 

She woke with a groan and flailing of limbs. This sudden movement would have been frightening had I been within striking range, but seeing as I was at quite a safe distance, her reaction was rather amusing. 

“What the fuck?!” She batted at the attack, opening her eyes as she wrinkled her nose, as though it had made her itch. The one paper ball that had tangled in her hair stayed trapped amongst her dark tendrils, even as she began to sit up, “Alexander! What the fuck are you doing??” 

I replied with another volley of paper, narrowly missing her eye by perhaps a quarter inch. She gasped, startled, as her spine straightened and she sat upright on the corner of the bed. She was much taller than my line of sight again, her head high enough that I had to crane my neck to look at her, but, I supposed, that was the norm. Her forearms flew up to protect her face, as I threw what ammunition I had left, she cried out in a frustrated protest “Stop it! Stop! You have a shockingly strong throw for someone your size. You’re gonna stab me in the eye with one of those!” I refused, taking out all my anger about the vet, about being too little for her to even hear, and for not being there when I needed her, as I prepared to throw my final round. I twisted over my shoulder wrenching my wrist far back behind, prepping my elbow for a strong follow-through, as her hands were raised in frantic protest. 

************ 

“Alexander! Stop that! I’m up now!” What the hell, little man?? I thought we’d made good progress, yet here he was hurling things at me in a tiny fit of rage! 

He wrenched back to throw it, muscles twitching, “Alexander!! Don’t you dare! Do not throw that at me!” We were both still as statues, frozen in time, staring each other down, “…I mean it! What’s gotten into you?? Put it down.” 

He didn’t budge.

“Seriously, you little bastard, what the fuck happened to you between the time I left and came back? You were sleeping so soundly when I came in. You were goddamn adorable and I thought ‘Awww, he’s actually pretty sweet’… and then it’s like you went all Mr. Hyde on me on a dime… Ah! I see your arm twitching. Don’t! Don’t do it! Why are you so mad? What happened to that pretty little smile, huh?” 

That was very much the wrong thing to say apparently, because a ball of packing paper collided directly with my cornea less than half a second later. Ouch. But also? Good aim. 

I sucked in a deep breath to calm myself before gingerly pushing off of the corner of the bed and kneeling in the carpet, closing the gap between the angry little man and I by about half the distance, while also getting us closer to eye level, “Okay…. I don’t understand what just happened, but clearly we’re not communicating in the best way possible and you seem upset. I’m sorry for that. What can I do, Alexander? How can I fix this? It may surprise you, because of how often it happens, but I’m really not trying to piss you off, I swear.” 

He avoided my eyes, as I blinked mine rapidly, tears falling down my cheek as my eye recovered from the blow. He sat there with his arms crossed over his chest, “Hey, please tell me what’s going on in your head. I obviously did something wrong to get the surface of my eye scratched. I’m sorry if I offended you. Are you mad because I fell asleep? Did you need me and I wasn’t there? I’m so, so sorry. God, and all this time I still haven’t given you your pain meds. I’m sorry, Alexander, you must be miserable and I’m fucking it all up. I’m still kinda getting used to this whole ‘learning to be responsible for another life’ thing…” 

As I stumbled over my words, I noticed his shoulders soften, as his stiffened spine relaxed a little, and he let out a sigh before finally tipping his chin to meet my eyes. That crystalline blue gaze, usually sharp enough to cut like a knife, was just a tiny fraction softer, more forgiving, “I am in a dizzying amount of pain, I’m starving, and as you could see from my recent unconsciousness, I am desperate for sleep. Perhaps, because of these contributing factors, I was responding a bit more strongly than I should have.” Wow. That was the closest to a kind of apology that I’d ever gotten from him! Well, besides those little flowers. He continued, “But I…. I wanted to… I was hoping that… Natalie, I remembered what they did to me.” 

It felt like a bomb went off in the foot and a half space between us. Just like that, my heart was in my throat. I could feel the throb of my agitated pulse in my neck, pounding in nervous waves. What had they done? I was terrified, but I had to know, “Oh my god! Alexander! That’s… that’s huge! Why didn’t you tell me sooner??” The dead pan stare I received was all the reminder I needed, “Oh… right… well, I’m ready to listen, now, I promise. But do you want food and medication first? What do you need most right now?” 

******* 

She gingerly placed her right hand on the surface of the dresser, a pointer finger absentmindedly floating up to caress the top of my left foot and ankle, which dangled off the side of the bed. This was as close as she’d dared to get and I felt myself instinctually jump when her skin pressed into mine. Normally, I would have pulled away, frustrated by the contact, but just now, I got the sense that she needed to touch me, almost as a way to soothe herself. She clearly felt badly for having fallen asleep and for upsetting me. I could see she was really trying to apologize and do better. That counted for something. Maybe this human was capable of improving. 

“Yes, something to eat and some pain relief would be very welcome right now. Thank you, Natalie.” As I spoke, I caught her eyes. Her lips pressed together into a line as her brow furrowed compassionately, and she nodded. 

“I bet the food is pretty cold now. Give me a second to heat it up and prep your meds, okay?” She very softly patted my ankle as she pulled her hand away and stood. It was my turn to nod, as she reached across the dresser for something covered by a paper napkin sitting on my desk. I hadn’t even noticed it was there before. 

I didn’t like being left alone right then. The second she disappeared behind the door, images of my torture came flooding in. I saw blood, scalpels, fingers, so many prodding fingers, my nerves ablaze with pain, their grotesque faces twisted into saccharine smiles as they teased me. It sent a shiver down my spine. 

I laid back, resting my head on the pillow, trying to keep my heartbeat steady and my mind clear. I wish I’d asked her to take me with her. The discomfort of being held and carried paled in comparison to the anxiety that was assaulting my senses now. 

My forehead became damp with a cold sweat, blood thundering in my ears, as I clutched crimson letters and fabric in a fist, applying pressure to my fluttering chest, as my stomach churned. I couldn’t help this psychophysical response to the painful memories that were battering my brain. It was as though I was reliving it, despite being safe from harm. It was embarrassing, to say the least, not having control over my own nervous system. 

Air was suddenly difficult to come by, as my chest heaved and found no real relief. I kept seeing those indistinct blue devices of torture, squeezing my face, yanking my hurt leg, pinching my bruised ribs. These very small parts of the human body that each were enough to subdue me. I trembled, face growing redder as air continued to evade me. 

Just then she returned, saying something about the meal. I wasn’t  exactly listening. But the moment she saw me, half collapsed on the bed, clutching my chest, she put down what she was carrying and rushed to my side.

******* 

“Woah, what’s wrong? Hey, hey, Alexander? You having a hard time catching your breath? Okay, I think you’re having a panic attack. That’s okay, we can get through it. These things are a pain in the ass but you’re way too chaotic yourself to be bested by one of these fuckers…” I spoke softly, and couldn’t help but notice the corner of his mouth turning upwards into a hint of that crooked smile, “Can you sit up? Okay good. Is it okay if I get nearer? Can I touch you?” His brow furrowed as he winced from pain while sitting upright, but he still managed to nod in the affirmative and flash his eyes up at me. Those pretty blue eyes. Even in a crisis they managed to burn an impressive shade. As he adjusted himself, I laid my right palm beside him, my pointer and middle finger very gently stroking his back, while my thumb smoothed his hair away from his eyes, before resting in his lap. He propped his left hand on the knuckle and squeezed, blinking rapidly. He needed help regaining control, “Hey, look at me, let’s try to breathe nice and slowly in and out. Follow my lead, okay?” He did so, still gripping onto my thumb as tightly as he could, “I’m so sorry they hurt you. They will pay for what they’ve done. I know you’ll make that happen. But they’re not here and they can’t get to you right now. It’s just you and me. And I don’t ever want to hurt you. I may annoy the ever living hell out of you, but I’d never want to harm you.” He shook his head slightly as he hugged my thumb against his chest. He was finally getting air into his lungs and I could feel his little hummingbird heart slow to a more manageable rhythm. I ran my pointer finger along the length of his spine, delighted he was allowing me to physically comfort him at all. 

“That was… I… I apologize for, whatever that was. It was highly illogical to respond that way—“ 

“—Uh-uh. Nope. We’re not doing that. No beating yourself up today. You ever heard of complex PTSD? You had a traumatizing experience. Your body and brain needs to process that. There will be no self-shaming here today. Thank you. Maybe try tomorrow.” I started to pull my fingers away to fetch the newly warmed food from his tray, but a pair of tiny, lithe hands pulling on the tip of my thumb stopped me in my tracks. 

“Thank you… I…” He looked up at me in a manner I’d only ever seen once before, when he was truly vulnerable and scared, clinging to my pinky finger in the waiting room of the clinic. He sucked in a breath as if he was about to say something and then thought better of it. He cast his gaze down to the hoodie, and as he pinched the fabric between his little finger and thumb, he chose these words instead, “This was a thoughtful purchase.” He didn’t look back up at me. Poor Alexander, it seemed he’d hit his limit of being vulnerable today. But I’d take what I could get. 

When I placed the tray of perfectly proportional dinnerware before him, I couldn’t help but notice a flush of pink to his cheeks, as he looked on, immediately clutching the knife and fork that didn’t, for once in his life, tower over him.  

********* 

I couldn’t help from swallowing hard upon seeing what she sat down on the bed beside me. A fork, knife, spoon, a dinner plate, a cup for water, a mug with steam curling into the cooler air, all perfectly sized for my hands. I felt a wave of emotion creep up and threaten to spill over, but I managed to keep myself grounded by inspecting the individual tines on the fork. It looked just like its human counterpart. How marvelous! 

Her eyes were poring over me, delighted by my life carrying on in miniature before her. How stereotypically human of her. I was about to request that she not loom so hard, when I stopped short. What if this wasn’t about a human cooing over someone little? What if it was more like the delight of a person who’s given a gift relishing in the joy of the receiver? Being the recipient of gifts was not something I was really at all familiar with. Yet, an instinct told me she wasn’t trying to insult me, in this instance. I’d choose to give her the benefit of the doubt. 

I seemed to be in a giving vein today, or maybe that was just aftershock from her having to see me shaking like a pathetic wet puppy. It was not my intention to ever let her see me like that again. 

However, my body could no longer withstand abuse and the sharp pang of hunger that ripped through me reminded me of the task at hand. 

Evidently, we were both quite hungry, because we ate in relative silence. She paused once to point at the steaming mug, with the butt of her knife, to say, “I mixed your medication with herbal tea. It might taste awful, though, just FYI. I put a drop of honey in, hoping that would help, but let me know how I can make it better.” I don’t know why, but that simple act of thoughtfulness touched me. It showed how she’d considered, beforehand, what my experience might be like and tried to fix it. She was stupid, she was loud, she was infuriating and sometimes altogether overwhelming, but there was no denying she had a kind heart. 

The flush of color to my cheeks told me it was time to quickly switch to another train of thought. I considered the objects in my hands, once again, to calm me down. I’d never actually gotten to use a knife and fork before, but it was important that I do my best to mask my ignorance. After all, I’d spent countless hours of my meager existence watching humans chow down right in front of me while I waited for scraps. I was more than capable of learning through observation. However, it was an entirely new experience to have the actual sensation of wielding them myself, by delicately slicing a mouthful of food before piercing it with the fork (tines always turned down of course, I may have been born in America, but I’d be damned if I conducted myself like one at the table… Natalie seemed to have no such druthers as she used her fork more like a shovel than anything else. I tried not to watch).

When the meal was done, which, it must be noted, was flavorful and extremely satisfying, I plucked up the mug and imitated what I’d always seen humans do: I wrapped my hand inside the handle, cupping it tightly with both hands to savor its warmth. To human ears, I knew this would sound ridiculous, but I had not anticipated the sheer thrill of being able to just effortlessly pick objects up. I wondered if lifting this mug up from its surface with such little muscular effort was akin to how she felt lifting me into the air. It was so easy. If I wanted a drink, I could pluck the glass of water from where it sat with one hand and lift it with hardly any effort. No strain, no overwhelmingly large utensils and portions. No constant reminders of my littleness to fluster and embarrass me. For the first time in my life, I found total ease, grace, and peace in an activity that had, historically, haunted me. This ‘breaking of bread’ was something humans actually seemed to enjoy, whereas I had always grimaced and done what was necessary to sustain life as quickly as possible, hopefully avoiding too much ogling from the giant pairs of eyes around me. 

Now I found myself clutching a white, ceramic mug, propped up against the headboard of my bed. With a low perspective and a squint of the eyes, I was indistinguishable from a man indulging in a nice cup of tea after a long nine to five shift. Why did that simple idea make my heart beat faster? For the first time in my life, there were things around me that accommodated me.

“Have you tasted it yet? How bad is it?” Natalie’s voice, always just a notch or two too loud, even though I was fairly certain she put effort into lowering it for me, tore me from my thoughts as I gazed up at her and shook my head, raising the mug to my lips. 

Dear god. It tasted awful. I struggled not to spit it back in the cup. 

“That bad, huh?” She winced, brows furrowing as she propped her head in her hands, and looked down at me. I shook my head with a grimace, flashing her a thumb’s up as if to say ‘no no, it’s great’. She laughed hard enough that she snorted, which made her laugh even harder. I rolled my eyes at how worked up she became and downed the rest of the concoction in one go, trembling from disgust as the taste medicine coated my taste buds. 

“Woah! Glutton for punishment, are we? You’re braver than me, I’m such a weenie when it comes to taking meds.” She raised her brows, as I put the mug down. I shrugged, gingerly wiping the corners of my mouth. As I looked back up, I saw she was holding the glass of water, looking absolutely tiny pinched between her finger and thumb, before me. I softened a bit more. She was being awfully kind. Did I actually feel a bit guilty for getting so worked up at her earlier? I took the water from her and nodded in thanks. What was this strange feeling seeming to generate from the pit of my stomach and rise to my heart? Maybe the medicine was kicking in? 

***************

He drank like a horse. Well… If a horse could be satiated with nothing more than a few drops of water. He drained the glass quickly, clearly desperate to wash down the bad taste. I hope it’d at least ease his pain. I felt so badly that I hadn’t taken good care of him. He’d been languishing in pain just after a major surgery and that was entirely my fault. Everything had been so chaotic in the last few hours it’d been hard to keep track of time. With a wince, he leaned over his right side and set the tiny glass down, which was clutched in his left. That seemed funny to me, why wouldn’t he just pass it off with his right? Was he left handed? I smirked, overcome with how adorable that was. In any case, I had to actively restrain myself from offering to pluck it from his tiny grasp and put it down for him, so he didn’t push himself too much.

“Natalie??” He waved his hand dramatically to grab my attention. I shook my head and cast my eyes to my lap (I’d pulled my desk chair up to the vanity to eat). Face flushed hot, I felt guilty for staring… again. 

“S-sorry… Okay, so, you’ve been happily fed and medicated… You have my full attention Alexander, tell me what happened to you back there.” 

He raised his brows expectantly, waiting for… Well, I didn’t know what. He crossed his arms, disapprovingly, when I didn’t get it. For someone so little, he could be so condescending sometimes! 

I was totally confused, “W-what?”

“You should get something to take notes. What’re they teaching you in that law school anyhow??” He smiled for just a moment at his own joke, but it was enough to melt my heart.

Little Nightmare, I’ll be the butt of all your jokes as long as I get to see you happy.

I spun the chair and fished for a notebook and pen from beneath my pile of student trash and returned to his side. I clicked the pen and waited eagerly.

He pushed himself up against the headboard, resting his right hand in his lap, his left gripping the sheets, before peering up at me, those two brilliant irises hardened and haunted by a memory. The air suddenly felt heavy. I could feel the nervous pounding of my heart inside my chest.

When he spoke, it was with a definitive conviction that was impossible to dismiss, “I have substantial evidence that they’re in violation of federal law, Natalie. We have a case. An open and shut one, at that, from my perspective. They violated federal malpractice statutes 73A and B from the American Animal Hospital Association. There was an investigation less than a year ago, they were court ordered to make that information publicly available and clearly refused!” He looked up at me wide eyed and passionate. He may as well have spoken a foreign language for all I understood.

“R-right.” I clicked my pen, looking askance and trying to pretend I was following what that even meant. But of course, nothing got past his shrewd little gaze and he caught on immediately.

“You don’t even know what those statues are, do you?” Way to call me out! My face flushed. His eyes bored into mine, waiting impatiently for a confirmation of what he already knew to be true. I bit my lip and shrugged as his shoulders slumped and he sighed, rather dramatically, while pinching the bridge of his nose, “I hope you have plenty of paper in that notebook, because it looks like we’ll have to start from the very beginning.”

I felt embarrassed that I didn’t already know what he was going on about, but I looked forward to learning from the most brilliant, tiny mind in the world. I just hoped he had the patience to educate me, “Okay, Alexander. Teach me. Tell me everything that happened to you.”

I watched those brilliant little eyes light up at the invitation to share. Of course he was excited, someone was willing to listen to what he had to say! I may not know everything you want me to right away, but I hope you know I’m on your side, Alexander.

With a another click of my pen and a nod from me, he stood a little straighter. He licked his lips, swept his bangs from his eyes, sucked fresh air into his lungs and… began.

My only hope, as I pricked my ears to listen to his story, was that I could be all he needed me to be in order to fight back. After everything I was sure I was about to discover he’d gone through, this brilliant, relentless, little fighter before me deserved to win. I knew I’d do everything in my power to help make that happen and so, I prepared to write down his every word, feeling both eager and terrified to discover just what sort of living hell unfolded from behind that swinging metal door.

[missguomeiyun]

Homecooking [May ed]

Anyone else reading who has "Sun-jae fever"? lol my month of May was basically suffering from this disease. .. & now that the drama Lovely Runner is over, I'm suffering from Monday illness T___T

Leftover gumbo soup (Campbell) with pasta & more veggies. Having rice & long pasta together was kinda weird but you know. .. some Korean soups contains noodles (usually the japchae glass noodles) & that's eaten with rice as well :O

JJM =]

I personally prefer jjambbong but you know. . haha once in a while, jjajangmyeon is great! This wasn't from a kit; I purchased the noodles & the sauce separately. & also added beef to the sauce instead of pork.

My version of a "bun" - aka Vietnamese rice vermicelli with various toppings. I have chicken breast (seasoned with lemon pepper), cucumbers & spring rolls.

Wanted to make a "big pot" item.. . made this ramyeon ddeokbokki. Contains: rice cake, carrot (need carotenoids), cabbage, kimchi, & pork belly.

Ate it with rice & topped with seaweed~

The leftovers tossed into soup form with vermicelli noodles. Who else out there converts leftovers into soup dishes?? :S I don't like making big batches of food bcos I get sick of eating it but things like ramyeon ddeokbokki with a bunch of ingredients is hard to portion down. Normally, it's eaten with rice but I don't like rice that much. .. so oftentimes, I make a soup with some form of noodles with what I have left.

As I was saying. .. I don't like rice that much xD here is a rice bowl =P

& more rice! The soup is a cross between budae jjigae & deonjang jjigae. As deonjang soup base but I added sausage & kimchi to it.

Another one of this Bon-juk congee. This was sooo tasty! I liked this one more than the previous kimchi & squid one.

Anita's creative cooking using expired garlic & chive cream cheese.

I made meatballs & stuffed cream cheese into them. For the sauce, I added more cream cheese, butter, lemon pepper seasoning & black current balsamic vinegar. But then it got so thick so I added milk...

The above was made as a pasta sauce.

It tastes better than it looks, okay? haha You might not believe me but it's true! I am honest when it comes to personal opinions :D I think it could use a little bit more "lemon" but I don't regularly have it available. It's missing a little zesty/tangy kick, you know what I mean?

Black peppercorn steak with ramyeon. SO GOOD!!!

Oh look- another rice bowl. Ribs + air-fried eggplant.

Thick rice noodles with baby bokchoy & fatty beef, feat 1 spoon of my friend Susan's mom's special hot sauce.

Beef & seaweed soup & rice. .. Wow, didn't realize I had so much rice this month HAHA this is crazy!

Thick rice noodles with bokchoy & Busan fish cake. I normally have the flat ones & recently got a bag of these hollow ones. It was okay; I prefer the flat ones personally. They're easier to cut & maybe it's just a psychological factor but I think those ones cook faster. Could also be the brand/ingredients of the fish cake. In theory, if the thickness is the same, & it's just in a diff form, they should take around the same time to cook, right?

That's it~

Sorry for taking sooooo long for this post. Been busy/lazy / fangirling ... hehe

[rydiaroads]

Destined with you babblings, episode 7

So is she gonna admit she tried to love potion second male lead? I'm guessing no...

I don't remember the whole his family killing the spell maker, when did we learn that?

Omg his jealous face is great

Lol them fighting to get to her door first after the spell is so cute. Even him throwing the house shoes at him, great detail

He's happy she tried to cast the spell on her? Really? That's an interesting twist to his character, I've seen so much hating on her for casting it, it's interesting.

There was some pun with 7th floor and straight just now that was not translated.

I love the little details like him covering her eyes from the sun.

I care so little for this side couple. He's still a big bully.

'I don't feel comfortable with your kindness'. I like the way that's phrased.

Why is it so hard for her to think that gardener guy is just a creeper on his own

Sure, why not, a lawyer tells a govt contractor he's not hired anymore.

Oh they're just here to threaten him, ok. I'm cool with that I guess.

This whole thing where they are saying she hit on sin yu is pissing me off, it's gonna get back to the bitchy gf and start shit.

Damn is that a lot of garlic on that chicken.

I know it's coming, but I'm not looking forward to hong jo and bitchy gf fighting.

He looks so... Sad while she's drunkenly ranting

I kinda expected her to call jae gyeung to come get her.

'i don't have a name' hits so hard, ow.

Wow, is he ignoring the comment about him not being told his own wedding date? Fuck.

So, like, was there really no magic? Cuz something made the box pop open. I want some fantasy here man.

God I hope she doesn't punch her or something. Well that was quick.

Of course she's already cheating, ugh. Is that the slimy business owner guy? I'm not sure.

I mean, I guess I'm glad their kiss was after they confirmed gf was cheating on him. Still feels weird.

Now to decide if I watch the next episode tonight or wait a day!

[themothface]

H 17 Soul-fe Care

This marks the first appearance of a character so vital to the comic (and so adorable) that it's possible to overlook the stealthy "Chicken Soup for the Soul" joke Biee slipped in there. Sneaky Biee!

The design of the Soul is based on hitodama (those ghostly orbs from Japanese lore/legend, but with an adorable little face. I used so many layers to create her features and glow effect and composite her in with Jae and the 'Thulhu plushie. The plushie is based on one Biee has, and will be showing up in the future too.

Keep an eye on Soul, she's going places!

[the-al-chemist]

Artemis Hexley: The Wilderness Years

Chapter 9: The Dinner Party

A/N: it’s Artemis’ birthday, and she enjoys a grown-up way of celebrating it. Warnings: mentions of canon-typical bigotry, alcohol, some awkwardness, bridezilla Penny.

The dinner party had been Chester’s idea. Artemis would have been happy spending her birthday having a few drinks at the Three Broomsticks or the underground nightclub in Charing Cross that Andre had introduced her to, but she was hardly going to say no to Chester offering to cook for her and her fiends.

“It’s too special an occasion to do what you would do any other weekend,” he had said. “After all, there is a lot to celebrate.”

This was true. Not only was it Artemis’ birthday, but Chiara had just finished her final exams for her Healer training, Tonks had reached her six-month anniversary of being a fully fledged Auror, and Penny’s boyfriend Lewis Parkin had recently proposed to her during a weekend in Paris. The last of these pieces of good news had been the one that had so far dominated the evening’s conversations. 

“Seriously,” Tonks muttered to Artemis, once the pair of them had slipped into the kitchen to clear away the plates and fetch more wine. “If I ever become that nauseatingly mushy over anyone, you have my permission to do me in.”

“Yeah, okay.”

“I mean it. Just put me out of my misery.”

Artemis picked up a piece of chicken from an otherwise empty plate and fed it to Fergus, who was sitting on the countertop looking hopeful. She shrugged.

“I dunno. She doesn’t seem miserable,” she said, with a glance over her shoulder. “I think she’s just really happy and excited.”

“Exactly, it’s sickening.” Tonks grinned. “I’m joking, obviously. I’m happy for her, it would be just nice to talk about something else for ten minutes, that’s all.”

“Is everyone like this about weddings, do you think, or is it just Penny?”

“Might just be Pen. You know what she gets like about organising parties, and this isn’t just any party. This is the party.”

“I guess,” said Artemis. She grabbed two wine bottles - the fancy red one that Chester had brought and the cheap pink one that was Tonks’ favourite - and nodded her head at the door. “Come on. We should go and be excited with her.”

“I’ll try, but if she starts talking about writing her own vows again, I might actually spew.”

Thankfully, Penny was not talking about her vows, nor any other part of the wedding ceremony itself. Instead, the discussion had turned to aesthetics, with Chiara listening politely and Jae looking incredibly bored as Penny chatted away.

“Well, I still haven’t quite decided what colour I want you all to wear,” she told Chiara, her engagement ring sparkling in the light as she moved her hands, “but it will either be pale pink, sage green, or maybe sky blue. In any case, it will definitely be a pastel shade. Bea won’t be happy, if it were up to her you’d all be wearing black, but she always looks so pretty in lighter colours, and it will be a summer wedding, so pastels make far more sense. I much prefer them, anyway.”

“And that’s what matters,” said Chiara. “It is your wedding, we will just go along with what you want. Don’t mind us.”

“Mind me!” Tonks blurted out. “I definitely want some kind of say in what I wear. What if it doesn’t suit me?”

Penny giggled. “You can suit anything, Tonks. You’re a Metamorphmagus.”

“Yeah, but-”

“I’m going to go looking at options with Andre next weekend, but I think I know what style I want for you,” Penny continued. “Probably mid-length, strapless-”

Artemis wrinkled her nose. “Won’t the dresses fall down if they haven’t got any straps?”

“- with a little bit of tulle under the skirt to give it some sort of shape. And then you all will have little bouquets of daisies to carry, because daisies are my favourite flowers.”

Tonks looked across the table at Jae, who appeared to have fallen asleep with his eyes open. “What’s your favourite type of flower, Jae?”

Jae puffed out his cheeks and exhaled before answering:

“Probably self-raising.”

The rest of the guests chuckled, and Chiara shook her head, her pale eyes rolling and lips twitching gently. 

“Will you have a daisy bouquet, too?” she asked Penny, who nodded emphatically.

“Yes, but mine will be bigger, because I am the bride.”

“Really?”  Tonks’ eyes widened in faux-surprise. “You should’ve said something before.” She winced as Artemis kicked her under the table. “Ow! What was that for?”

“And I want my dress to have daisies on, too. Maybe little ones embroidered on it or lace with a daisy pattern. I’m not quite sure yet, but I definitely want it to be white,” Penny sighed. “I know it’s a bit dishonest, but I have always wanted a white wedding ever since I was a little girl, and I don’t see why I shouldn’t have one just because of one very small technical detail. After all, it’s 1995. No one is actually a virgin anymore.”

Lewis Parkin, who Artemis had yet to hear utter a single word all evening, looked at his new fiancée and blinked slowly, his expression one of mingled endearment and exasperation. Across the table from him, Kingsley was paying close attention to his glass, whilst Chester shuffled slightly in the chair next to him.

“Anyway,” he said loudly, reaching across the table to pick up his glass of red wine, “I was hoping that now everyone is here again, we might toast the birthday girl.”

Everyone else hurried to pick up or charge their own glasses, except for Artemis. Once the full wine glasses were all held aloft, Chester spoke once more.

“Not only is it Artemis’ birthday today, but earlier this week she received an incredible job offer.”

“Oh, Artemis, that really is wonderful news,” said Penny, beaming from ear to ear. “What job is it? Curse-Breaking?”

“Personal secretary to the Head of the Department of Magical Games and Sports,” Chester informed everyone, and Penny’s blue eyes and mouth formed perfect circles. “Which is rather impressive, considering that she is only twenty-two, and didn’t even apply. He selected her personally.” Artemis tried and failed to not roll her eyes at Chester’s proud tone. “Then again, she is always impressive. So, here’s to Artemis.”

“To Tiny,” said Kingsley, with a nod in Artemis’ direction.

“To Artemis,” the others chorused. They all  lifted their glasses and sipped their wine, except for Tonks, who winked theatrically at Artemis.

“To enabling a man’s gambling addiction until he offers you a prestigious job role,” she said, before taking such a large gulp of her drink that she half-emptied her glass. Artemis laughed.

“I mean, it wasn’t just that,” she explained. “Fine, maybe it’s a bit of that, but also it’s because he was really happy with the dragon challenge. Said it was the best entertainment he’s had for a long time, much better than the lake challenge, because no one could actually see anything that was going on.”

“Ten points to Artemis, none to Thomasina Thistlethwaite,” said Tonks, and she held out her palm for Artemis to high-five, which she did. “A win on all counts.”

“When do you start?” Chiara asked, and Artemis shrugged.

“Not sure. I haven’t actually taken it yet.”

“Why not?” Penny frowned. “Does it not pay very well?”

“It does, I just… I haven’t made up my mind yet, that’s all.”

“There’s no rush,” said Chester. “Ludo doesn’t need an answer until after the final challenge, so there’s plenty of time to think it through properly and make up your mind based on the other options available.” He took a sip of red wine and rested his arm on the back of Artemis’ chair. “I think you will probably end up going for this one, though.”

Artemis laughed. “You do, do you?”

“Absolutely. This is an excellent opportunity and a strategic career move. Plus, I doubt that any other position will give you as much money or stability.”

“I dunno how much stability it will give me,” said Artemis. “I mean, this is Ludo Bagman we’re talking about.”

“True, but there are far worse people to have as your boss. Trust me, I know,” Chester said darkly. “I spent my first three and a half years at the Ministry working for Dolores Umbridge.”

A collective groan of sympathy and disgust echoed around the table. Kingsley shook his head and shuddered, and next to Artemis, Tonks stiffened in her chair. She looked nervously between Penny and Chiara, the latter of whom’s face a passive mask, but her already pale knuckles had whitened as she tightened her grip on Jae’s hand. Artemis’ eyes widened, and she opened her mouth to change the subject, but before she could say anything, Lewis Parkin spoke for the first time that evening.

“Umbridge…” he repeated. “For why do I ken that name?”

“She’s the one pushing the new lycanthropy bill,” said Chester. “If she gets her way, all werewolves will need to declare their condition so that people know about it when they’re hiring someone for a job or considering renting a property to them.”

“It’ll never happen,” Jae half-scoffed. Though his voice held no tension, his jaw jutted slightly. Chester did not seem to notice this, for he tilted his head one way and then the other and continued:

“I think it might, actually. Umbridge is awful, but she is also very shrewd, and she’s picked her timing well, given what happened at the World Cup-”

“Those weren’t werewolves, though,” said Artemis. Next to her, she could feel Tonks bristling. “You can’t take what-”

“I’m not taking anything. I’m just saying that it’s a clever move, politically speaking.” Artemis glared at Chester, and he sighed. “Consider it. Last summer it got out that a werewolf had been teaching at Hogwarts, living at the school with people’s children all year, and no one knew about it. Then, at the World Cup, all these maniacs in masks start coming out of the woodwork, and we can only speculate as to who was underneath those masks. You can see why now more than ever, people may be interested in having legislation that gives them the right to know exactly who’s living next door to them. I’m not saying that it’s the correct course of action, but-”

“It sounds like you are.” 

“I’m not, Artemis. I’m just playing Devil’s Advocate, that’s all,” Chester told her, and he placed his hand on her knee and squeezed gently. “People who are scared will do all sorts of things if it makes them feel secure, and right now, lots of people are scared.”

There was no point in trying to argue, but Artemis was not placated. She crossed her arms over her chest and glowered sullenly at her wine glass. A tense sort of hush had fallen over the table, one which was broken by the sound of Kingsley’s low, gentle chuckle.

“You know what I’ve been scared about recently?” he asked, his brown eyes crinkling at the corners. “Who would be cooking this evening. The last time I was invited here for dinner, I was served beans on toast.”

Almost everyone let out laughs that were as much relieved as they were amused. Artemis shook her head.

“It wasn’t just beans,” she corrected Kingsley. “I grated cheese, too.”

“Of course, how could I forget? I also recall being offered a mixture of red and white wine to drink.”

“Red and white mixed?” Jae’s eyebrows shot up. “That’s almost criminal, Hex.”

“In my defence, I was very young and I didn’t know anything about wine at the time. I still don’t, really.”

“Right,” Jae grinned. “And what about your cooking? Do you know more about that now, or are you still limited to a diet of ‘things on toast’?”

“Actually,” said Artemis, sitting up straight in her seat and raising her chin, “I’ll have you know that I can make four different types of potatoes now.”

Jae clapped his hands three times slowly before reaching for his glass and raising it.

“Always impressive,” he said drily. “Forget birthdays and job offers, this is the sort of thing we should be drinking to.”

Artemis pulled a face, but she still picked up her own glass.

“To potatoes,” she said as she raised it to Jae.

“To never letting you cook for me.”

“We can all drink to that,” Tonks said, and she finished the second half of her wine in one gulp. 

The rest of the group laughed and toasted again, and this time, Artemis joined them, giggling as she finished her glass of the expensive red wine. It was probably quite good, but as she still did not know much about wine, it could just as well have been Tonks’ favourite pink one.

The rest of the night passed without further political discussion or tension, with the guests preferring to talk about less potentially controversial topics. It was not until the very end of the night, after Penny and Lewis had already left and Tonks had fallen asleep on the sofa, that the topic of the Ministry’s werewolf reforms came up again.

“I’m really sorry about earlier,” Artemis said as she bade Chiara and Jae goodnight at the front door. “Chester would never have brought up the werewolf stuff if he had known…”

Chiara shook her head and smiled sadly. 

“It’s okay, Artemis. I’m used to it,” she told her. “It’s really not a problem, he was only talking about the new laws they’re passing.”

“It’s just a vote. They haven’t been passed yet.”

“And they won’t be,” Jae said stubbornly.

“Actually, they probably will.” Chiara sighed. “Chester’s right. Umbridge and her supporters, they’ve really picked their moment. Everyone has been so afraid since the Dark Mark went up at the World Cup. People are terrified about what that might mean for the future. It’s easier for the Ministry to distract everyone by scapegoating werewolves, so that’s what they’ll do.”

“They won’t.”

“Yes, they will, Jae.”

“What does that mean for you?” Artemis asked, her eyebrows furrowing deeply. “Will you have to put your name on this list?”

“Probably.” Chiara’s front teeth grazed her lower lip. “My landlord would almost definitely kick me out of my flat, though. And I’m not sure that St Mungo’s would want me working there if they knew, either.”

“Hardly anybody knows about you,” said Jae. “You could lie and get away with it.”

“Maybe, but then if I get found out, it won’t just be St Mungo’s that I’d lose out on. Breaking the law like that, I could lose my license to work as a Healer altogether.”

“But you’ve just worked so hard to finish the training. You’re so good at Healing.” Artemis shook her head. “That’s not fair!”

“It isn’t. But then, neither are so many things,” said Chiara sadly. She blinked before smiling again. “Don’t listen to me. I’m just scared. And maybe Jae’s right. Maybe it won’t pass, who knows?”

But the look in her eerily pale blue eyes made it clear that she knew exactly what would come to pass. Artemis watched her and Jae walk away down the darkened street and returned to the kitchen feeling far less carefree than she had left it. She barely noticed the earnest tone of Chester’s voice or the wrinkles in Kingsley’s forehead as the two men talked quietly by the sink until they saw her enter and immediately fell silent.

“You look worried, Tiny,” said Kingsley. The very sound of his deep and melodious voice made Artemis feel less worried, and she shrugged. “Sickle for your thoughts?”

“Nothing I think is worth as much as a Sickle,” she told him with a wry smile.

“I couldn’t disagree more.”

“Would you like to stay for one more drink, Mr Shacklebolt?” Chester asked, but Kingsley shook his head.

“As much fun as this has been, I think I have had far too much to drink as it is. I’m too old not to suffer for my evening’s fun in the morning these days,” he chuckled. “I think I’ll leave you two young people to continue your conversations without me. I’ll see myself out.”

He shook Chester’s hand and hugged Artemis, who rose onto her tiptoes to kiss him on the cheek. Once he had left, she looked around the kitchen.

“Did you clean as well as cook?” she asked Chester, who laughed.

“Why do you sound so surprised?” 

“I’m not, I just… Thanks. This was all really kind of you.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. It’s your birthday, Artemis,” said Chester. “And I had Kingsley to help with the cleaning.”

“Right,” Artemis nodded. “You sounded like you were getting along well.”

“We always get along well.”

“That’s not... What were you two talking about?”

“Nothing substantial. Work, mainly. Very boring stuff.”

“How true,” Artemis grinned mischievously, her head tilted to one side. Chester sighed and shook his head before stepping towards her.

“I’ve been thinking,” he said, quietly. “And I think that maybe we should live together.”

Artemis blinked. “Where?”

“Wherever you prefer. I could move in here with you, or you could join me in my overpriced flat. Or we could find somewhere new together. Maybe in Cardiff, it’s cheaper than London and closer to home.”

“But London is your home.”

“I mean home as in where I grew up. Portmeirion.”

“Oh, right,” Artemis said. She nodded, but frowned at the same time. “What about Tonks?”

Chester laughed out loud. “What about Tonks?”

“She’d be here all alone.”

“Tonks is a big girl, Artemis. She will cope with living alone. Or she could find a new housemate. Someone you can actually charge rent to,” Chester suggested. He raised one eyebrow. “Well? What do you think?”

Artemis did not really know what to think. The house she had grown up in had always been dark and dingy, a house rather than a home, and she co-owned it with the brother she no longer wanted anything to do with. Her choice to move back eighteen months previously had been one made out of necessity rather than desire; after leaving school she had sworn that she would never live there again. She should have been jumping at the chance to leave. The problem was that leaving the house now meant leaving Tonks, abandoning her there the way she had been abandoned as a little girl and left largely to fend for herself.

But Tonks was not a little girl, like Chester said, and perhaps she would not have to be by herself at all. She could live here with someone else, and Artemis knew who might want to do just that. After all, right now, Chiara was scared, and scared people needed to feel secure. And if Artemis could do something to give her that security, she would do it in a heartbeat.

So, she decided to ignore the small voice in the back of her head that was telling her that she wasn’t ready, that she was also scared, and nodded.

“I think it’s a good idea,” she told Chester. “Yeah, we should do that.”

Chester smiled, and kissed her gently. 

“Excellent,” he whispered. “It’s late. Shall we go to bed?”

“You go. I’ll be up in a minute.”

Once Chester had gone upstairs, Artemis opened the door to let Fergus in from the back garden, conjured a blanket to place over the sleeping Tonks, and extinguished the candles that were still flickering on the table. Without them, the house seemed darker than ever, so dark that she could not even see where she was at all. She could have been anywhere in the world, and yet she was here. Still here.

Maybe that little voice had been wrong, she thought, as she padded upstairs. Maybe she really was ready to leave.

[lucyandthepen]

sweet cream, cold brew is so soooo *deep breath* fucking good. i surely need mark lee rn im not kidding at all. love this kind of slowburn aka their feelings for each other just get more obvious each time but none of them actually makes a clear move. ESPECIALLY markkkkkkk good god i'll bite him. no because I'd think twice too, it's like -- it really seems he likes her but also.... not? I SCREAM out of frustration but truly because of that the impact of them finally saying the things that should've been said and done long ago is wayyyy bigger than i expected. their little moments are so cute and sweet as if they're not (initially (????)) lusting for each other esp the mc 😭😭😭 huge thanks to youngho's existence (i honestly do kinda feel bad for him tho NDHDHDH i DO wish she actually gets him a present eventually and even treat him or something 😭) and jaehyun's nosiness they finally came thru lmaooo just wanna highlight that one when they were out buying those blind boxes..... THEY'RE SO FREAKING ADORABLE. but fuck mark lee being this shy, usually tripping on his words.... polite and nice and just overall mark lee but once already inside the bedroom and has already bared it all ....... dear god i want him too . (PLUS WHEN HE KEEPS GLANCING AT THE MC'S TUMMY WHEN SHE STRETCHES OR SOMETHING......... BITCH SO SLICK BUT COWARD FOR STILL NOT MAKING A MOVE BACK THEN. HIM HAVING THAT KIND OF THING THO.... WHEW. WE KNEW. we knew. oh my god)

*can't wait to binge all these new releases of yours can't believe i missed it >:(( i'm sure this is so late now but welcome baaaaack i've missed u here <3

hey jae! i hope it's okay that i call you that; i just find some importance in being able to connect using names or aliases together, so i always check just to be sure! i am so so happy you had a fun time reading this fic; it's my longest yet and i've honestly been so self-conscious about how winding and slow it seems, so i'm really happy you were able to enjoy the slow burn!!!!!!! i absolutely approve of the idea of you biting mark because HE DESERVES IT! >:( shy cutie pie with actual game?????? WE LOVE TO SEE IT!

i was also really worried about this mc because she's one of the more assertive ones with clear goals (i.e. get in mark's pants, even if she can't say it out loud in just so many words LOLOLOL) but lettuce be real... we need a pushy gal every now and then because mark was teetering on the edge of being obvious and being aloof and WHY WOULD HE DO THAT! (answer: he's a wittle baby........... a precious chicken nugget..............)

poor johnny really got his ass beat (figuratively) while he was minding his own business for WHAT!!! despite the fact that he was very nosy... his heart was in the right place SIGH i actually really love writing johnny in my fics — in this one and last night on earth — because there is an unparalleled SASS to him that i am a key enjoyer of!!! and jaehyun really pulled through with them big ears n bigger mouth WE LOVE IT!

smut aside, my favorite scene had to be the mystery box too!!!!!! just... something so sweet and pure about him sharing this little hobby of his with her because he wanted them to be closer and he really viewed her as a friend after some time :( i love his big ................................... heart LMAO

i am a big believer as well in mark being someone whose skill comes out the best when he's asked to step up to the plate fully so basically i just think he's someone who's always bound to surprise and i feel like that really just stems from how goofy and awkward he is but on stage............... he is a MENACE to society (and our hearts) so we love to see shy, polite, blushy mark let his instincts and possessiveness and kinkiness (tummy bulge may have to be a running headcanon for me with him from now on i fear......) finally come through!!!!! DESERVE!

i am so so sorry for my absence, but i am so happy to be back and so happy that people have been so nice and understanding even if i disappeared for a while. :( i am always so grateful to hear from you, and i hope that i continue to make things we can all enjoy (and possibly thirst over?? SJIDFSJDI). i hope you have a wonderful day or night, wherever you may be, and that we can talk more (see: endlessly) either like this or in private! <3

[gcldfanged]

@crimson-elegy

“You’re going to disappear, Jae.”

A fun new game to play, ones that always involved sweat and blood and screaming.

Except his mentor was cradling a rifle to his chest, fingers reverent on the grain of the stock and fondling the cold blue steel. Slid a brassy round into the chamber, snapping it closed before bringing the scope to his craggy face.

Verdot’s eyes never blinked, like a walking corpse. Like death, himself.

“Run.”

The recruit took off like a spooked gazelle, flying across the hillocks and the dead, fallen trees. Dust kicked up from his boots, river water splashed around his ankles and oozed inside and soaked his woolen socks to the bone.

“You have five minutes.”

What can he do in five minutes? Keep running? Hide? Piss himself?

The rocks beneath his feet gave way and Yoon sank chest-deep into the water, shivering and grimacing as he fought the current.

The thunderous crack of a gun shot rang out into the clear, dry air. The bullet whizzed by his left ear, embedded itself into the bone-white bark of a birch tree on the muddy bank he was swimming towards.

There weren’t even words to describe the feeling.

“That was a warning shot, try harder.”

He’d crawled onto the grass and rocks before dirt flew up into the air mere centimeters from where his hand had just been, shaking and trembling in the mire. Jae ran until his lungs burned, the pulse of his neck so heavy and hot, it was almost painful to feel.

He found a small warren beneath the roots of a skeletal, rotting tree and hid for a time, waiting until the sun began to dip low on the horizon line and turned the sky radioactive orangeish-pink. He kept moving, even when each step felt like knives in his soles and the cold night air threatened to turn his wet clothes misty with hoarfrost. Until days had passed and Veld finally came for him with fresh clothes and food, began teaching him fieldcraft and the art of camouflaging.

He remembered the grainy footage of a tall, taciturn man with dark hair. The quiet confidence of a trained killer in his element, hands a blur as he assembled a gun from so many pieces and mechanisms spread out along the ground. The neat little ring of holes where someone’s heart should be, their brain. So handsome and terribly deadly. He was everything Jae wished he could be and aspired to become.

His Sous produced the lighter with a conjurer's grace, a gentle flame licking at his cigarillo with the same easy elegance. The room was warm with spices, smoke, and savory aromas that were enough to make anyone salivate. 

Jae wore fragrances light, subtle, the way it would grace someone’s nose and disappear like a sigh in the breeze. A drop inside each wrist, between his collarbones. The aroma of his skin an iconoclastic marriage between zesty pink pepper, almond, neroli oil, rum absolute and tobacco. His cigarillo was woodsmoke and burnt sugar, swirling like incense around him in a hazy halo.

“I must say, this is a surprise,” he admits, sliding a spotless and gleaming plate of braised brisket, rice, and stir-fried water spinach across the table. The sauce was rich with cloves and star anise, shrimp paste and brown sugar. Jae’s lips closed around a silken spoonful of egg custard and stewed chicken, salty-sweet umami coating his tongue to lavish effect.

“To what do I owe the honor?”