#jedcest fanfic

[area50dununiverse]

I loved your new fic OMG but I have never read anything so smutty I actually was bright red reading it lol! but it gave me an idea like liam spanks john and ed as an actual punishment B/C if they are gonna act like naught kids he will treat them like naughty kids and at first they hate it it hurts and is SO embarrassing but as time goes on they deliberately try to get in trouble B/C they start to find it hot and have to hide their arousal? sorry if this is gross it's literally filthy lol

Hello lovely anon! PLEASE don’t apologise for smut, nothing is too smutty for me!! 

I’m glad you liked my fic, sorry I made you blush :)

I loved this prompt and was super excited but I’ve had mad brain block recently and really struggled with getting down a single word, so I really hope this is okay and not as rubbish as I think it is….?

I also only made it from John’s POV, because I couldn’t do multiple POVs because I suck at writing!  

I really hope you like it!! There is smut at the end because y’know..

It all happened so fast. One moment Liam was shouting at John to put the box of cereal back and the next, there was cereal all over the floor and Liam’s hand was stinging. John looked like he was about to cry and Liam was horrified. He had to take a second to connect the string of events.He had shouted “if you’re going to behave like a kid, I’ll treat you like one” and he had smacked him.

He opened his mouth to say sorry, to pull him into a hug and ask for forgiveness but then John was crouching down to clean up his mess with a small “sorry Liam.”It had worked. Liam had never seen either of them tidy up a mess without being nagged for hours.

Edward looked personally offended by the whole thing and opened his mouth to speak but Liam was quicker. “Unless you want one too, shut up.” Liam watched Edward’s mouth snap shut and he was suddenly proud that he had found something to actually make them listen.He cleared his throat and walked out of the room, hoping he didn’t hurt John.

•

There was never a discussion about it, it just happened. Whenever John and Edward ‘misbehaved’ they would get spanked by Liam.They both hated it, but Edward seemed to hate it more than John and would do anything in his power to keep it from happening.

John got it a lot more than him. He tried not to, but one thing always lead to another which always ended up with him getting a sore arse. John had to admit to himself that it didn’t actually hurt too much, if at all but it was just the idea of getting spanked. It was embarrassing and belittling and John dreaded it when Liam would give him the look; the look that told John what was about to happen.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-” John said with wide eyes. Liam had told him ten times not to attempt a cartwheel because he would end up breaking something. Liam had thought his warnings had worked until he left the room and heard the sound of glass breaking followed by a suspicious silence.

He went back in to find John standing in the middle of the room, his cheeks pink and his bottom lip between his teeth. Liam looked at Edward, who was sitting on the sofa, the exact look of worry and guilt on his face.

That’s when Liam’s eyes caught sight of the television. It was laying on the floor and the screen was smashed.Liam had no choice but to act, no matter how much he didn’t want to. Even though John apologised, Liam had warned him so many times so he had to follow through or they will know he was a push over.

Liam pointed at the floor in front of him and stared down at John. He only hesitated for a second before taking the few steps towards Liam. His eyes shifted towards Edward once before he slowly turned around and bent over just a little bit.Liam saw him close his eyes, bracing himself and he considered apologising before he smacked him but he knew that would make him look weak.

John was only wearing a pair of tracksuit bottoms, thinner than the jeans he was usually in, so Liam did it lighter than normal so it wouldn’t hurt him.John went and sat down, his arms crossed and face set. Liam watched him for a moment before pointing at the broken tv and saying “tidy this up,” before leaving him to sulk.

John was still sulking an hour later. He hated this new punishment. It hurt and it was awkward. No one had ever spanked him, not even his mother when they were children. He considered calling Liam out, maybe he could refuse, tell him that he won’t do it. But he liked Liam and they needed him. John didn’t want Liam to quit and he figured that he only wanted the best for them. John knew the way stop it happening again was to be good. It’s not that he meant to upset Liam and misbehave, he was just having fun and that sometimes led to misbehaving.

Edward side eyed him and smirked so John shot him a dirty look. “Don’t even say it,” John pouted, sensing Edward’s oncoming 'I told you so’. Edward had warned him to listen to Liam, told him what would happen and John hated it when he was right.“Did it hurt?” Edward asked instead, leaning towards him to look at his face. He shrugged, his face heating up slightly. John huffed again embarrassed and pissed off by the whole thing.Edward patted him on the shoulder in sympathy and John huffed again.

It was that night that John woke up from a strange dream. He was uncomfortably hard and hot and confused. He couldn’t remember most of the dream once he was awake but did remember getting spanked and the sounds he made as he cried out with each slap to the arse.

He looked over at Edward’s bed and watched him for a few seconds to make sure he was asleep before he wrapped his hand around himself, definitely not thinking about the sound each slap made against his skin in his dream.

The next day John couldn’t shake the strange feeling. He was confused and embarrassed. He didn’t tell Edward nor Liam about his dream but he knew and that was embarrassing enough. He kept away from Liam, even though the man in his dream was faceless, it was Liam that started this mess.

Just when John thought he was back to feeling normal again, Edward got himself in trouble. Liam gave him that look and John shifted in his seat, very aware of the consequence.John tried to avert his eyes as Liam stepped towards Edward but he just couldn’t help looking. John knew he shouldn’t be getting excited about this but as he watched Edward close his eyes and brace himself, he couldn’t stop the bolt of excitement run up his spine.

John was hard, and he knew it was wrong because he was watching someone smack his own brother. It was weird and John knew it. Edward made a small sound, almost a whimper and John shifted positions again, crossing his leg over and placing a cushion in his lap.

Edward flopped down next to him, his arms crossed and brow furrowed. John gave him a small smile, his cheeks turning pink as the embarrassment crept back in. He thought about his dream again and flicked his eyes back to Edward before standing up and trying to look natural and hide his excitement as he left the room.

•

John managed to stay out of Liam’s way for a week. There were no punishments for either of them and John was starting to forget it had ever happened.That was until he playfully pushed Edward, knocking him into the newly organised paperwork Liam has left on the table. Liam looked at John with fire in his eyes and John wondered if the room could hear his heartbeat.

He said John’s name and felt he was suddenly too hot. He could feel his cheeks turn pink and chest tighten. Liam didn’t give John a chance to go to him as he was suddenly in front of him, turning him around by his shoulder and landing a smack against his arse.It was harder than normal and John figured it was his temper but had an effect on him that he couldn’t explain. Liam was saying something but John couldn’t concentrate on anything but the uncomfortable feeling in his tight jeans.

“I can’t believe you, John,” Liam was rambling, “just when I thought you had grown up!”John cleared his throat, trying to keep his voice even as he said a quick “sorry Liam.” He held his hands in front of his crotch, trying not to look suspicious.“This was all our plans, flight information, hotel bookings…” Liam pointed at the floor but John didn’t look. It was over too quick, and he needed more somehow. He looked at the table, to what was left of the pile and before he could stop himself, he was sweeping his arms across the table, taking two glasses of water and a plate with what was left of Edward’s breakfast with it.

Edward’s mouth hung open, his eyes wide. John didn’t dare look at Liam, he felt frozen to the spot, excitement and nerves making him feel light headed. Liam was shouting and there were hands on him again and John almost asked for it, biting back the word 'harder’ as Liam raised his hand.It connected and John thought he whimpered but couldn’t be sure. Liam was telling them to get out, so John did, quickly leaving while trying to hide the fact he was outrageously hard in his jeans.

Edward followed, his voice going over John’s head as he headed for their bedroom. “What’s wrong with you?” Edward asked when their door was shut. John turned his back to him and mumbled a quick, “I need the toilet,” before leaving Edward standing in the middle of the room, confused.

•

John felt dirty but he needed it, couldn’t stop thinking about it and as he watched Liam talking on the phone, he made a plan.He needed to misbehave again, do something to get that contact, to make Liam spank him. He was getting hot just from the thought. It had been two weeks and as much as John tried to distract himself from the feeling, he couldn’t help himself.

John didn’t know what to do. Edward was talking a mile a minute from beside him but John wasn’t listening. His eyes ran over the hotel room, trying to figure out what he could do to make Liam angry, get him to react. Just at that moment, Liam put his phone down right next to the jug of water and John couldn’t contain the smirk on his lips.

He wandered over and picked up the jug, glancing at Liam once more before he dropped it, water soaking Liam’s phone. “John!” The reaction was instant and John held his breath. “What the fuck?”He was rushing over and pulling John around in a blink and John was so ready.

John let out a small whimper as Liam’s hand connected, his jeans muffling the sound of the slap. He wondered what it would sound like if Liam had removed his trousers and pants, pulled them down to his ankles, so John could no longer hide his excitement, showing Edward how dirty he is.

It was over too soon, leaving John wanting more. He was so hard now and he pulled his jumper down as he straightened himself up.Liam had already moved on as he left the room, leaving John in a daze; aroused and breathless.

He had to leave, desperate to sort himself out. Edward said something as John left the room but John didn’t stop, didn’t care what he said as he locked the bathroom door and quickly shoved his jeans to his ankles.He looked at his arse in the mirror, turning his head around to try and see any indication of what had happened. There was no mark though as his jeans protected his skin. John huffed, he wanted a red handprint and just the thought of it made him twitch.

He took hold of himself and let out a slow jittery breath, his eyes falling closed as he imagined the sound of skin slapping skin, his naked arse; offered up as he bent over and the sting.John whimpered at the thought. The sting would be amazing and John thought about how he would feel it for ages afterwards and he would look at the red angry hand mark to go with it.

John was moving fast, his hips bucking into his hand, tiny gasps and small moans the only sounds that could be heard, along with the unmistakable sound of his hand working himself over.

John was on was the edge when there was a knock on the door, making him freeze. “John?” Edward’s voice called, “are you crying? I can hear you crying.”John’s hand slowly moved, not being able to stop himself.“I’m fine-” he answered, his voice strained. John accidentally whimpered again and he knew Edward would’ve heard and would think he was crying still.

He suddenly got an idea. “Ed?” He breathed, taking his hand off himself “come in.” John unlocked the door and pulled Edward inside. Edward let his eyes take the sight in before meeting John’s eyes.John was too worked up to think logically, his brain clouded with arousal. “I need your help,” he puffed, his hand cupping himself again.

This wasn’t the first time they had seen each other like this. They shared a bedroom all their lives and had spent far too much time together to hide away when they needed to sort themselves out, so they freely touched themselves with the other one inches away in the next bed; sometimes even racing each other to see who could climax first.

“What?” Edward asked, his brow furrowed. John shifted on his feet before saying “smack me.” Edward’s face went from confused to shocked and back to confused in a heartbeat but John was turning himself around and bracing his hands on the edge of the sink. “Please?” He breathed.“I can’t hit you, John,” Edward whispered, making John whine in frustration.“Just do it please?”“Okay.” John heard Edward mumble. There was a long stretch where Edward didn’t do anything and John was about to snap at him to do it when he felt his hand on his skin.

It was too light, he was being too careful but John still felt the shock and the tingling on his skin. He closed his eyes and moaned, his voice strained as he said “harder Edward.”Edward’s hand came down again, harder this time and that was it. John cried out, his hand coming down to stroke himself again. There was another sting as Edward’s hand came down again.

John turned to the mirror and craned his neck around again, this time seeing the red handprints on his otherwise unblemished skin. John whined and braced himself against the sink again, snapping at Edward for more, harder and quicker.Edward did as John asked, without hesitation this time, the sound of the slap echoing around the small room along with John’s moans. John pumped himself harder and faster and one more smack and he was coming, harder than he ever had before.

John turned to face Edward with a small “sorry.” He felt guilty now he was in his right mind, he knew he shouldn’t have dragged Edward into this. Edward gave a one-shouldered shrug, his face neutral and John breathed out a laugh. Typical Edward, John thought, he’s just spanked his brother into the most intense orgasm he’d ever had and yet he’s completely unfazed.

John slumped down onto the lid of the toilet to catch his breath, watching Edward look at him, his eyes running over John’s body.“You owe me,” Edward finally said, “you can do me next time.” John gave a half-hearted smile and a nod as Edward turned to leave the room with a smile of his own.

[silverloke]

i'm new to jedward from big brother and thought there would be like a crap ton of fanfic for them but there is none??? weird i thought surely this must be a ship lol!!! maybe i was wrong!!! :0

Ouch, I think you found the fandom a few years too late. :’(Welcome to the Jedworld, though! :)There used to be so many fics (mostly jedcest because, obviously) and there was even a fanfic archive for just that ship. Some people have saved the archive so if you ask around maybe someone can send it to you. (or if anyone who read this knows/have it then let us know!) Livejournal still have some communities where the fics aren’t all locked or deleted!

http://john-and-edward.livejournal.com/http://xfictor.livejournal.com/

sorry i can’t be of more help :(

[area50dununiverse]

J+E prompt: One is in love with the other (which ever) and feels like they can't lose their virginity as there's always that hope that it will be to the other one. The other one badgers them about why all the time and one day they confess, but don't say they have feelings for them just that they want it to be special and the only person they for sure know will love them and keep them safe is the other twin. Other twin starts to get feelings but neither know about the other's feelings

Hello, sweet anon! Sorry, this took so long!! Also, I don’t like how it jumps from present tense to past, but the beginning bit sounded like Edward had died when it was in past tense!! I hope this isn’t as bad as I think it is!! There is a lot I don’t like about this fic but I can’t get it any better so……. Ta-Da!

(FYI, the towel thing that John does was totally my own coping mechanism when I was bullied at school)

John loves Edward. He loves every little thing about him. He loves his eyes and the way they sparkled, lighting up every time he spoke, he loves Edward’s hair and the way it always looked perfect; even first thing in the morning. John loves the way Edward walks, the way he bounces with every step and he loves how kind Edward is.Edward finds it impossible to be mean, and John would sometimes laugh and tell him that he’s too nice, but never telling him how much he loves that about him.

Most of all, John loves his smile. Edward could light up a room with one single smile and John fell hopelessly more in love with him every time he saw it.Next to his smile, John loves his laugh. Edward has a habit to always cover his mouth while he laughs because he thought he looked goofy. He was once told at school that his laugh was stupid, so now Edward would always try to silence it whenever he found something funny. John always wanted to shout at him tell him that he was perfect and he should never feel self-conscious about anything. John loves the moments where Edward finds something so funny, he can’t laugh silently; he just let’s go and bursts out into a fit of giggles.

John loves Edward’s physique. He’s  slimmer than John, sleek and defined. John would catch himself watching Edward while he changed, letting his eyes roam over the expanse of milky white skin. Edward never noticed and on the occasions John thought he had, he never said anything. No matter how hard he tried not to, John would always go back to watching him.

There wasn’t one single thing he disliked about Edward and he hated himself for it. John was under no disillusion that feeling this way about your own twin brother was normal but he couldn’t help it.He had tried so hard to deny it to himself, to try to believe that his love for Edward was strictly brotherly but it came to a point where he couldn’t do it any longer; deep down he always knew. So he finally admitted it to himself and carried the secret around like a ball and chain in the years since.

Sometimes, when it all gets too much for John to handle, he locks himself in the bathroom to silently scream into a folded towel.He found this way of coping after Edward had started flirting with who was soon to be his first girlfriend. They had got chatting as John and Edward walked home from school one day and soon John was forgotten about, trailing behind the two of them as they laughed and talked.John was seething by the time they had got home and when they finally got inside, he told Edward he was going for a shower and disappeared.As soon as the door was locked, the tears were streaming down his face, his fists clenched at his sides. John could picture the girl and Edward going on a date, holding hands, kissing and he couldn’t take it. He grabbed the towel and pressed it against his face, his cries silent.

Edward and the girl had ended up going out for a while, and John would have to watch them on daily biases. Edward was so open about everything that he would go to John and tell him everything. He told him about their first kiss, the first time Edward had touched her and the first time she had touched him. He even told John when they had sex. It was at her house and Edward returned excited and giddy about the whole thing and John had to pretend he was too, his big smile never faltering. As soon as Edward was distracted with something else, John scurried into the bathroom, grabbing the towel and burying his face in it, his body shaking with the force of his cries.

The X factor years were hardest. They had girls (and boys) throwing themselves at them all the time. Edward would tell John that he had kissed a girl or two and John would always snap at him that they had a squeaky clean reputation to look after so Edward soon stopped taking the girls up on their advances to John’s relief. Once it was all over though, Edward went back to seeing girls again, which obviously lead to him to do more with them and telling John all about it later.“You could have any one of these girls,” Edward would say, “why don’t you just talk to one?” This would hurt John the most. It confirmed in his own mind that Edward could never be interested in him as anything more than a brother. He would try to push John to have sex, not understanding why he wouldn’t.

“I want to wait,” John always said, “I want to choose the right person, someone I’ll spend the rest of my life with.” John’s brain would scream ‘you Edward!’ But he would ignore it the best he could. Edward would shrug and go back to talking with the girls, aiming his perfect smile at them and John would feel sick.

Sometimes John would give in to his urges and touch himself with images of Edward behind his closed eyes. He would imagine Edward’s lips stretched around him, Edward’s hands on his body, Edward on his hands and knees while John vigorously fucked into him.He always felt guilty afterwards, the shame bubbling in his stomach like a sickness but he knew he would do it again and again.

John loves Edward and there’s nothing he can do about it. The thought of Edward getting a serious girlfriend sometimes crosses his mind, the thought of him loving anyone other than him would eat away at him. Edward would sometimes notice and ask him what was wrong and John would smile and keep on pretending. He didn’t notice often as these thoughts mostly happened at night, after Edward was long asleep and John was laying in his own bed, staring up at the ceiling and refusing to look across at Edward.

John sometimes wondered how Edward would react if he ever did come clean. Would it ruin everything? He sometimes imagined Edward smiling and reassuring him 'I’ll love you no matter what’ imaginary Edward would tell him.Other times, most of the time, he imagined the look of disgust and horror on his face, snatching his hand away from John’s and telling him never to even so much as look at him ever again. It’s over. You’ve ruined everything John.No. John could never risk it. Edward was far too important to lose.

So he carries on. He continues watching Edward shamelessly flirt with girls and he knows he will scream about it later when he’s locked away. For now, John just has to smile and laugh and make any excuse to touch Edward, a subtle hint to the girls he’s flirting with that Edward is his.

“Why haven’t you had sex?” Edward asked out of the blue as they lay in their beds one night. John looked up from his phone and tried to look nonchalant about it.“I told you, I wanna wait.” He kept his voice even and controlled, looking back at his phone screen but not reading anything on it.“Why?” Edward asked, turning over to look at John, his eyes sleepy. “Do you like boys John?”John shot Edward a look at the sudden question. Edward was just looking back at him, calm and unfazed. “Because you know you can tell me? I’ll always love you.”

John couldn’t help but smile at this. “I dunno,” John said honestly. He had tried thinking about it before but hadn’t made up his mind. He wasn’t really attracted to girls but he couldn’t think of any boys he liked either. Just Edward. Always Edward.“You can still have sex though, there’s nothing wrong with it.” Edward pushed. John put his phone down and turned to face Edward, cuddling his pillow and hooking a leg over his quilt.“I don’t trust anyone,” John admitted honestly, “I want to do it with someone I love and I haven’t found anyone.”

'Except you’ he added in his head. Edward gave a nod, pulling his bottom lip between his teeth as he thought. “I wish I had waited,” Edward mumbled, “so it meant something.”John watched Edward for a moment, considering what he was going to say.  "I don’t think I’m ever going to fall in love,“ John said truthfully. He couldn’t fall in love with someone when he was already in love. He didn’t want to fall for anyone else and he felt that pang of sadness in his chest."Yes you will,” Edward answered, meeting John’s eyes before they both fell into silence. “Sometimes I think that we should just get married,” Edward said after a while as he huffed out a half-hearted laugh. John did the same and forced out a laugh.

He turned away slightly so Edward wouldn’t pick up on how fake his laugh was or notice the hurt behind his eyes. He didn’t want to be the joke, no matter how ridiculous it was. He didn’t want Edward to find the idea of them being anything more than brothers so impossible that it would be a joke.They fell back into silence and John was starting to think that Edward had fallen asleep so he glanced over. Edward was still laying in the same position, his eyes on John. He gave John a small smile as they looked at each other and mumbled a “night night,” before turning over, his back towards John.“Night.” John mumbled, his chest tight and stomach twisting.

“Why don’t you start dating?” Edward asked the next day as they dressed. John pulled on his ridiculously skinny jeans, wiggling his hips into them and cursing them. “Why are you so interested in my love life suddenly?” John huffed, doing up the button and pulling the zip up. He watched Edward repeat his actions as he wiggled into the same jeans, his hips moving gracefully.“I want you to be happy,” Edward answered, looking at John as he done his jeans up.“Sounds like you’re trying to get rid of me.” John aimed for his words to be light hearted, a joke but he could hear the weight behind them and hoped Edward hadn’t.“Never,” Edward said without hesitation, as he pulled on a white top, “I’d be lost without you.”

John smiled and turned towards Edward. There was something behind his eyes that John couldn’t pinpoint, couldn’t read. Edward was quick to turn away, looking into the mirror and running his fingers through his hair. John watched him for a moment before going over to help style his hair, like normal. Edward flinched away from John’s touch and mumbled something about wanting his hair flat and unstyled before leaving the room.John looked at the door, confused and panicked. He knew. He had to know; that’s why he’s trying to push John into getting a girlfriend. He couldn’t stand to be near John and it all made sense now. All the questions about John’s love life; he was waiting for an admission. John ran into the bathroom and grabbed a towel as he slammed the door shut.

John became careful around Edward, making sure he wasn’t doing or saying anything that could freak him out. John would catch Edward watching him, flicking his eyes away as soon as John would look at him. There was an awkwardness between them that John hated and no matter how many times he asked Edward if he was okay, Edward would always reply with “yeah, I’m fine,” with one of his brightest smiles. John could see through it though.John also noticed that he had stopped talking to girls. He obviously spoke to them, kissed fans on the cheeks and embraced them for photos but he had stopped flirting and John couldn’t remember the last time he went out with anyone else but him.

It was weighing John down. He couldn’t quite pinpoint where it all went wrong or what he might’ve done. Maybe he had accidentally said something, maybe Edward had caught on by the way John looked at him. He went over everything they had spoken about and couldn’t figure it out.

“Why don’t you go out with girls anymore?” John asked one night as they lay in their beds. It was too dark to see Edward’s reaction but John heard him shift.“I don’t feel like it.” Edward’s voice was soft, almost a whisper and John knew that he was upset, they were too close for him not to pick up on how he felt.“What’s wrong?” John asked the darkness, “I know something is wrong Ed so just tell me.” There was a long pause before he heard Edward shift again.“You.” John heard him whisper, making his heart sink.“What?” John breathed.“I didn’t say anything,” Edward lied, “I just yawned.” John nodded even though Edward couldn’t see him but he could still feel the tightness in his chest. He knew he had heard it. Edward had said that he was what was wrong and John felt like crying.

“You said it was me-” John gently said, blinking away the tears.“No, I didn’t John. Just go to sleep.” Edward shuffled around again before they fell back into silence; John trying not to make a sound as he cried.

“I’m sorry,” John said the next morning as Edward got out of the shower. He had been showering while John brushed his teeth, his brain going over the whole thing again, just trying to understand it all.“What for?” Edward mumbled as he wrapped himself in a towel. John followed him into the bedroom and leant against the doorframe, watching hm.“Everything.” John decided. He was sorry for everything. Everything he had ever felt, everything he had ever thought. Edward gave him a questioning look, one hand holding up the towel, the other on his hip.

“I’ve ruined everything. You hate me and-”“I don’t hate you!” Edward snapped, stepping forward once before he stopped himself.“See?” John gestured towards him, “you can’t even come near me, Edward!” John noticed Edward’s cheeks turn pink as he looked at the floor. “I’m so sorry,” John cried, letting the tears fall and this time, Edward actually came to him, putting a hand on his shoulder.“You haven’t done anything John, it’s me. I’ve made everything awkward.”

John looked at him and shook his head. “You can’t blame yourself. You can’t help it.”Edward looked like he was about to cry as he stepped away again and ran his hands through his hair. “I don’t even know how or when it all started.”John shrugged, he didn’t know either. Couldn’t remember a time he didn’t love Edward and now Edward knew and it was all so wrong. He wondered if this was it. Edward was building up to tell him that they need time apart and that will lead to Edward never coming back to his weirdo brother.“I just suddenly realised,” Edward told him, “although I think it’s always been there, deep down.”

John nodded because he was right. He knew exactly how John felt and John couldn’t deny it. “You’re freaked out, I can tell.”“No,” John mumbled, “I just don’t want to loose you.” Edward’s face dropped, John’s words enough to make him cry. John wanted to comfort him but he wasn’t sure if he could. “Don’t get upset, if that’s what you want, I’ll do it. I’ll leave?”

“Don’t leave me-” Edward rushed, “I’m sorry, I’ll try to stop John, maybe go back to those girls?”John’s heart sank at his words. He wanted to date again, prove to John that they were no more than brothers. “I was just hoping-” Edward cut himself off to wipe his face. “Hoping that the person, the person you’ve been waiting for all this time could be me and it’s not and-”“What?” John held up a hand and met Edward’s tearful eyes.“I’m sorry John, I don’t know when I started to love you but-”“Wait-” John frowned, trying to process the information. Had Edward been talking about his own feelings the whole time?

“I do, you are my person, I thought that’s why you hated me?” John’s voice was shaky, nerves and maybe a tiny bit of hope welling up inside of him. Edward froze and looked back at him.“I am?” He asked, his lips turning up at the corners. “You love me?”“I’ve always loved you,” John admitted and the words felt good finally being spoken like a weight had been lifted and John could finally breathe.“I want to be your person,” he said with a smile and John felt like crying again. “You wanted to wait for someone that will love you forever?” Edward met his eyes while one hand undid the towel around his waist, letting it fall to the floor. “I’m your person.”

John smiled, a few tears falling as he stepped forward. Edward hooked a hand around the back of his neck before pulling him in for a kiss and John could finally feel Edward’s lips against his. Edward pulled John down onto his bed and John was finally going to be with the one person he loved. The one person he knew he would have forever and the one person who would have him forever.

[area50dununiverse]

I love your fics with Liam they're amazing! I was thinking a sequel to the one where they have a threesome with Liam waking up with horrible guilt because he knows are young and naive/innocent the boys are and he can't help but think that he should have been the responsible one and turned them down so he cuddles with them and talks to them and they just have a really open discussion about sex with blushes at them innocently asking about filthy things (+optional smut Liam gets turned on by it)

Hello!! Thank you sweet anon, I hope you like this!! I added smut because, that’s just what I do, I just can’t resist!!

Liam gently woke up, his eyes flickering open as he stretched his body and woke up his muscles. His leg brushed up against another person and as he moved, there was another person on the other side of him.

Shit.

As sleep left him, the realisation of what he had done struck him and he opened his eyes to see one-half of Jedward peacefully sleeping next to him. He wasn’t sure which one it was due to the sleep clinging to his eyes but holy shit.

A sudden wave of nausea hit him like it always did when he felt anxious. He felt guilty and terrible because they had trusted him and he should’ve known better and should have told them no.

The body behind him was stirring and before Liam could move, an arm was slung around him and he was pressed up close, body warmth spreading down the whole length of Liam’s body. It felt nice actually, to be nestled down between the two of them. They were naturally very cuddly and warm people and Liam took a moment to just relax, a sense of calm washing over him.

He felt cocooned in warmth and something he could only describe as sweetness.Which made him feel even worse, guiltier. They’re so sweet and innocent; although Liam supposed, judging by last night, they weren’t that innocent but there was still an air of innocence to them that he felt he had taken advantage of.

The one in front of him peeked an eye open before blinking the sleep away as he slowly woke up. He looked straight at Liam and Liam held his breath, waiting for the reaction. But there wasn’t one, all he did was smile sleepily and turn onto his back with a yawn. Liam soon realised it was John as his eyes focused on his sleepy face. “Okay?” Liam whispered because he didn’t know what else to do. John just nodded before leaning over Liam and nudging Edward awake. Liam smiled despite himself, the thought that one couldn’t be awake without the other. When one was up, the other had to be too. It was sweet.

Edward stirred and shifted, his body pressing further into Liam’s and Liam wanted to let himself close his eyes and enjoy the feeling but he felt a bolt of panic shot through him and shuffled away. He knelt at the bottom of the bed, covering himself with the quilt and looking at the twins. John was watching Edward while he stretched, arms reaching out above his head and long body sprawled out, and fuck they were not shy as Edward made no move to cover his nakedness. Liam averted his eyes but then Edward made a noise, a kind of groan as he stretched and fuck.

“I’m sorry,” Liam quickly said, looking at John, who was at least covered from the waist down.“For what?” John snapped his eyes towards Liam and he could see how hard it was for him to look at anything but Edward and there was that guilt again.“Oh no,” Edward whined, “did you book us for something today? I thought it was a day off.”Liam shook his head, chancing another look at him. He was laying on his back, one leg bent at the knee, the other flat out in front of him and Liam couldn’t help it as his eyes dragged down the length of his body.

He suddenly realised that it was his bad knee that was bent, something Edward did to relieve the pressure when it ached and there was the worry. Was it hurting? Had he hurt Edward last night? “Is your knee okay?” He suddenly asked, making John look at Edward, face full of concern. Edward frowned, his eyes flicking between the both of them and nodded before asking, “what the hell is wrong with you?”

“Last night…” Liam mumbled, “I’m sorry, I should never have…” He couldn’t get his words out, couldn’t say it out loud. “You two, there’s so much love there and you need to keep that between you two, not for people like me who can’t say no.” Liam’s voice was stern, like this was some big life lesson, like the time he taught them how to turn on the bloody fridge and he wanted to slap himself because who was he to give them a telling off? they should be telling him off.

“What?” Edward sat up, the movement pulling the quilt from John and Liam wanted to scream because they weren’t helping. “We came looking for you, you didn’t trick us into bed.”“Liam-” John said but all Liam heard was the way he had moaned his name the previous night and he decided he needed to get as far away as possible because they had an effect on him that he couldn’t help.

Liam stood up and quickly pulled on his boxers that were thrown on the floor. “What’s wrong?” John asked, with a worried frown and Liam felt even more guilt. He didn’t want them to think they had done something wrong or that he regretted it because of them. Liam regretted it because of himself because he should have listened to his brain instead of his dick.“You’re my friends and I should never have said yes.” Liam answered, “it’s taking advantage.”“How?” John asked and Liam really wished that they would cover up. “It was our decision.”“You two can hardly decide on what to have for dinner most days, let alone making decisions like last night!” Liam snapped. He usually would have laughed at his remark but he couldn’t bring himself to.

“Sorry.” Edward said then, looking sad “it’s our fault and now you feel bad.”“No,” Liam hushed, taking a step towards him and putting a hand on his shoulder, “it’s not your fault. I should’ve been a grown up about it.”“We’re adults Liam.” John snapped and it occurred to him that maybe they did know exactly what they were doing. They were right, they came after him, they instigated it.

John got up and stepped towards Liam, pulling him back towards the bed and mumbling “just a lay-in, nothing else,” and Liam couldn’t resist the warmth and the comfort of being snuggled up with them.Edward was quick to reposition himself back to where he previously was, his body pressed down the length of Liam’s and eyes closed. Liam wondered why John didn’t mind this because if Edward was Liam’s, he wouldn’t let anyone within a mile of him, let alone this.“What did you mean when you said we need to keep it between us and not for people who can’t say no?” John asked as he climbed in on Liam’s other side. This made Edward lean back, looking at Liam with his big eyes that made Liam want to run again.

“You can’t just be asking anyone to bed with you, sex is just for the people you love.” Liam could feel his cheeks heating up as he spoke but John just looked even more confused.“But you have sex and you’re not in a relationship,” Edward spoke what John looked like he was thinking. Liam shifted and nodded, “Yeah but that’s different.” Liam said, “if I had what you did, I wouldn’t share it.”

“But you were only helping us,” John added with a shrug like it was no big deal and Liam rolled his eyes.“Yeah but we still went to bed, it was still wrong.”“Because we’re brothers?” Edward frowned, sitting up to fully listen.“No, well yeah, actually no not really; it’s different for you two, kinda expected.”John looked a little offended at that while Edward looked strangely pleased, almost proud. “What I’m trying to say is that I shouldn’t have been here. I helped in the wrong way.”

There was a stretch of silence and Liam actually started to relax and just when he thought he could doze off, John spoke. “Like, does it work the other way ‘round?” He asked with a frown “say if I wanted Edward to fuck me, do I have to be on all fours or will it work on my back?”Liam gave him an incredulous look which went straight over John’s head so he answered the question. “Yes it will work, same rules apply,” Liam said shortly, trying his best to keep the mental images at bay.Edward gave John a smile that conjured up all the thoughts he was avoiding and fuck, what was the matter with him?

“How about on top?” Edward asked suddenly, leaning forward to look around Liam at John. “Like, riding,” he added with a smile while raising an eyebrow.“So deep,” John marvelled, leaning forward to meet Edward’s wicked eyes. Liam huffed out a frustrated breath which got their attention, both of them looking at him with that same little smirk. “You okay Liam?” John asked and he honestly didn’t know what to say.“Liam?” Edward snapped his fingers in front of his face and Liam nodded, not daring to speak. He couldn’t trust his voice to come out even and controlled.

John started talking again but Liam wasn’t listening to what he saying, his brain too busy with the images from last night. The funny thing was, they even didn’t aim to be sexy and Liam didn’t know how they did it. But they did.He was getting hard again and he thought about leaving but knew he couldn’t get up, the quilt was the only thing keeping them from seeing. Edward was laughing now, his face breaking into a big grin and Liam smiled too, trying to make out like he was listening but all he think about was what he wanted that mouth to do to him.

Liam didn’t quite know who’s, or what led up to this moment but there was suddenly a pair of lips pressed against his, firm and warm. Judging by the breathy giggles against his lips, Liam guessed it was Edward and it took him few seconds to react.His brain battled with the situation while his dick was certain that he wanted this and gave him the go ahead to kiss him back, so like always, Liam followed instructions from the wrong part of his body.John was next to move, his lips joining Edward’s. Liam had never had a three-way song before and he wondered how he had lived his life without it because fuck it felt good.There were lips and tongues and Liam could feel them kissing each other and there was no denying that he was hard now.

“Show us,” someone mumbled, breath ticking Liam’s wet lips.  "Just like last night, show us something else?“No, Liam thought, it’s not going to happen.“Okay,” he answered, ignoring his rational thoughts, “yeah.”

John pulled away with Edward following a second behind, leaving Liam desperate to more. Edward hooked a leg over him as he climbed over to get to John, straddling John’s hips and pushing him so he was laying flat. “How do I do it?” Edward asked, looking across at Liam.Liam swallowed and took a moment for the sight before him to sink in. “I didn’t do it last night, I don’t know how.” Edward went on and Liam dumbly nodded, trying to find his tongue.

“Just. Just…”“Use your fingers,” John helpfully supplied, his hand reaching out towards Liam. He slipped it under the covers and palmed him through his boxers while Edward bent John’s knees up and lent down for a look. Edward looked like he was trying to work out a puzzle and Liam would’ve laughed if he wasn’t so turned on.“One finger-” Liam panted as John gave him a little squeeze. Edward sucked his index finger into his mouth before entering John without hesitation or warning. John gasped and his hips twitched and Liam wanted to touch him. He didn’t though, he wanted to wait until Edward was at least inside.

Liam was bordering on madness by the time Edward was ready. John was laying back against his pillows, back arched, both hands holding his knees against his chest and cheeks red. Liam lay next to him, watching intently as Edward prepared him, gripping himself tightly so close to losing it.Edward was concentrating hard and Liam didn’t think he noticed how ready he was himself, all focus on John and making sure he wasn’t hurting him. It was like Edward had completely forgotten about himself until he was lining himself up and slowly pushing in.

Edward took hold of John’s legs, allowing John’s hand to go back to stroking Liam and Liam thought he was going to come on the first stroke. Edward made an ungodly sound, a high pitched moan, long and loud and both Liam and John moaned in response. Needless to say, it didn’t take long for Liam to come, hips erratically bucking into John’s hand, moaning and groaning.

John was making little humming sounds with every thrust, his eyes screwed shut. There was a line of sweat on his forehead and Liam wiped it away, dragging his eyes down John’s body and up Edward’s until he got to Edward’s face.His face was slack, eyes hooded, mouth hanging open with the sweetest sounds falling from his bright red lips.Liam took hold of John and it wasn’t long until he was coming, shouting out Edward’s name, come landing on his chest and stomach. Edward’s thrusts were getting sloppy and Liam watched him run a finger down John’s chest, through his come before bringing it to his lips and sucking it into his mouth. Edward came, his finger in his mouth muffling his whimpers.

He collapsed down on top of John, his breathing heavy, the same as John’s. Liam watched them for a moment, still enjoying his afterglow. They looked amazing and Liam made sure to store the image away for a later date, for a horny night or a lazy morning.“Stay here,” Edward said as he lent over to pick up one of their t-shirts and using it to wipe his and John’s skin clean.“Yeah, stay here. Sleep.” John added, getting himself comfy. Liam watched him hold on to Edward, wrapping his arms around his waist. Edward pulled Liam’s arm so he was cuddling it, both arms wrapped around it while his head lent on his shoulder. Liam shuffled down, letting his eyes fall shut.He knew he would feel twice as bad later, but for now, he just wanted to be cuddled as he slept.

[area50dununiverse]

johnI and edward get caught fooling around in the toilets at school and get in big trouble John and Edward get in that first ever real fight but soon realise that when the school calls their parents the next day things will all be over and they spend what could be their last night together and love making ensues which starts off hot with Edward letting john do things he's only ever dreamed Edward would actually let him do to him but ends up squishy and soft and nostalgic with tears? Please!

Hello! I didn’t know who you wanted the fight between, so I made it so J&E argue… Hope that’s okay! I’ve been really stuck recently so I hope this isn’t too terrible!!! I also gave it a happy ending because.. y’know? 

Below as always. 

John pushed Edward into the cubicle, his lips pressed against Edward’s. He had been thinking about kissing Edward all day during his lessons. Now it was almost the end of the day and he couldn’t resist it.

“John” Edward gasped, his hands pushing against John’s chest gently. John took the opportunity to kiss Edward’s neck, making him giggle softly. “Not at school-”

“No one will know” John answered simply, connecting his lips to Edward’s again. Edward kissed him back, pushing against him and humming into his mouth.

John smiled against him. He knew Edward would give in.

John fumbled with Edward’s trousers, trying to get them undone in the tight space. “No John!” Edward whispered, his cheeks flushed and lips wet. John smirked and stuffed his hand down the front of his pants, watching his eyes fall closed, head falling against the cubicle wall.

“No one will-” John screamed as he suddenly fell backwards, gripping on to Edward and pulling him down with him. It took him a few seconds to realise that the door he was leaning on had been opened and as he hit the floor, he caught sight of the head teacher before Edward landed on him, trousers still open and John’s hand still inside.

Mr Williams looked at them both, his face shocked and mouth open. Edward scrambled up on his feet and desperately started to fix his trousers. “What is this?” The teacher asked, his voice tense. John looked between him and Edward, his brain completely forgetting how to talk. “My office!” Mr Williams snapped before walking out of the bathroom.

John looked up at Edward his mind reeling. Edward stared down at him, his face stormy and eyes fiery. “I told you!” Edward suddenly burst, startling John. “I fucking told you John!” John stared up at him dumbly, trying to figure it all out. “But no!” Edward shouted, reaching out and grabbing him “you just had to push it!” John was dragged up by Edward and pushed against the wall.

“You were so stupid!”

“It wasn’t just me Edward!” John shouted back. Edward was suddenly shoving John, his hands pressing him further into the wall behind him.

“You’re so stupid!” He cried before storming out, leaving John to dumbly follow. He didn’t know what to think or what was going to happen to them. Edward was a few paces ahead of him and as John watched him walk, he could feel himself start to panic. Edward was right, he was so stupid to even look at Edward in public, let alone the things he was doing to him.

They got to the office and was let in by Mr Williams, who still looked shell shocked. “I really don’t know where to start” he mumbled, his eyes flicking between them. “I’m going to be fair. You need to go home and talk to your parents” John looked at Edward, who kept his eyes forward, looking somewhere behind Mr Williams. “I’m going to give you that chance before I call them first thing tomorrow.”

John felt sick. What was he even going to say to his parents? What was Mr Williams going to say? It was a mess and John was responsible.

“I’m going to let your parents give you the talk” Mr Williams went on to say “but I will still need to see you tomorrow about your behaviour in school.” Edward nodded and so did John. “Now go home boys.”

Edward was the first to leave, huffing past John and leaving the room quickly without a word. John followed, hurrying after him.

He’d really messed up. Edward was mad, their parents will go mad and John knew people will find out eventually. But most of all, he was worried because Edward was so angry at him.

Edward walked home ahead of him after John gave up calling his name and trying to walk beside him. He was close to tears, John could see it; so he left him alone and settled for walking behind him in silence.

No one was home when they got in so John followed Edward up to their room in silence to get changed. They had never fallen out before, not really. Of course, as they were together all the time they bickered about stupid stuff, but John has never seen Edward this mad and he didn’t know what to do. “Talk to me” he finally said as he watched Edward change into a pair of black tracksuit bottoms. There was more silence and John was starting to think that Edward wasn’t going to answer.

“Do you know why I’m upset?” Edward asked, turning to fix John with a look “John, this is over, everything we have is over because now they’re going to know and do you think they’re going to let us be alone for two seconds?”

John fixed his eyes on the mole just above Edward’s nipple, not being able to stand looking at his sad eyes any longer. He was right, John wasn’t thinking that far ahead and the weight of what was happening sunk into John. “We’ll find a way, we always do” he mumbled, grasping onto any tiny bit of hope he had.

Edward flopped down on his own bed and laid in silence. John looked at him and desperately wanted to be close to him, he needed to just be with Edward. “Can I lay with you?” John asked for the first time in their lives. They had always jumped in and out of each other’s beds without a thought, but this felt different, like John had to ask.

Edward turned his head to look at him before nodding and John quickly joined him, positioning them both so he was spooning Edward. He rested his cheek on the top of Edward’s hair and gave him a squeeze. “This is different though John” Edward said to John’s earlier comment, stamping on his shred of hope.

“What are we going to say to them?”

John asked, his mind picturing their parents and how they will react to the news.

“Let’s not say anything,” Edward said “we can make an excuse and go and talk to Mr Williams and stop him from calling them, maybe they don’t have to know?” John frowned, his mind clinging onto a new bit of hope.

“Yeah, like we can say that I was helping you-”

“Because the zip of my trousers broke and you’re the only one I can ask to help” Edward turned around in John’s arms to face him. He was smiling now and John grinned back, the shred of hope getting bigger. “Yeah! And even if he does call mum, we can still say that, she’s bound to believe us!” John excitedly said before kissing Edward’s lips. “I love you” he whispered, pulling Edward impossibly closer.

“I love you so much” Edward answered before kissing him again.

John actually felt good about their plan, he figured it was fail proof and stopped worrying about it all. That was until Edward slipped into his bed late that night. They always waited until they were sure everyone was asleep before either one moved to the other’s bed to avoid getting caught, which John supposed was ironic considering the situation.

“It’s never going to work” Edward whispered as he rested his head on John’s chest. “We’ve fucked up. Big time.”

“What?” John whispered back, “of course it’s going to work.” Edward was a lot more grounded than John, he looked at things differently, not letting wishful thinking cloud his judgment and John wished that just once Edward would let hope take over.

“They’re going to make one of us move rooms” Edward whispered after a few minutes of silence. John’s heart sank. He couldn’t imagine being apart from Edward all night, he wouldn’t be able to sleep. “We need to make tonight count” Edward suddenly said, sitting up and shifting about. It took John a second to realise that Edward was slipping off his boxer shorts before he was pulling John’s off too.

John smiled despite himself, running a hand up Edward’s thigh. “John, i want you to-” Edward let out a shaky breath and John imagined his flushed cheeks. He couldn’t see him in the darkness but he knew exactly how he looked. “Use your mouth?” He finished weakly, his voice nervous. John froze, his heart skipping a beat.

They had only ever kissed and touched each other before. John had  once brought up the subject of blowjobs but Edward didn’t seem so keen so he dropped it. He sat up and turned on the lamp, seeing Edward’s pink face, unsure and embarrassed. John flew forwards, connecting their lips in a wet kiss, his body reacting to the idea.

John knelt up, guiding Edward backwards so he was laying against the pillows with John between his thighs, their chests flush as John kissed him. “You know how long I’ve wanted to do this to you?” He mumbled as he dotted kisses all over Edward’s chest, moving down to his stomach. Edward made a strangled noise, his hips pushing up against John as he kissed down the trail of light brown hair just below his bellybutton.

“Oh god” Edward whispered as John took him into his hand, his mouth hovering just above him. John had no idea how to even do it, but he figured he would pick up, it’s not like Edward had anything to compare it to. He gently licked the tip, experimentally before opening his mouth and taking him in.

Edward’s whole body twitched and he was making the best little sounds, desperately trying to silence himself by pressing his hand over his mouth. John soon got into a rhythm, only gagging a couple of times before he knew when to stop, his hand working the bit John couldn’t fit in his mouth. John had only just really got into it when Edward’s hands starting pulling at his hair and he was telling John to stop. He pulled off with an audible pop, amazed at just how dirty that sounded. “I’m gonna come if you carry on” Edward breathed.

“That’s kinda the point?” John whispered back, his voice hoarse, sending a thrill through his body. Edward was a mess. John guessed he must have been pulling on his own hair by the way it was sticking up in all directions. His lips were pink and red from where he was chewing them and John could see teeth marks on his forearm from trying to silence himself.

John had never been so turned on in his life.

“No, I want-” Edward was still catching his breath. His eyes were closed and his cheeks and chest were pink. John wanted to kiss him again, but instead, he waited for Edward to finish . “Do you want to-” Edward opened his eyes and met John’s stare “have sex?” He finally said and John thought he was going to pass out.

“Are you ready?” John whispered, the excitement building in his chest. John had been waiting for this for months, waiting for Edward to be ready, not wanting to push him. Edward nodded and John wanted to explode with excitement.

They decided that Edward should top and used spit to hurriedly prepare John. He was too impatient, just wanting Edward to hurry up, but Edward insisted that they do it properly so it won’t hurt.

John was a sweaty mess, writhing around on the bed, knees up and head thrown back, begging Edward to just do it.

It did hurt, John wasn’t quite prepared for how much it actually hurt at first but once Edward was fully inside and John relaxed, he found the ache strangely pleasant.

Edward was braced above him, mouth slack and eyes blown. He was moving slowly, small little thrusts that were gentle.

John didn’t ever want to leave this moment because everything was so perfect, so right and he couldn’t wrap his mind around just how much he loved Edward.

“I love you” John whispered, reaching up to brush the hair from his face. Edward smiled but John could see the sadness behind it.

“I’m going to miss you” Edward said, his voice cracking slightly. “I’m going to miss being with you.”

John wiped away a tear that was rolling down Edward’s cheek and pulled him down so he was laying on top of him. Edward stopped moving his hips but didn’t pull out so John wrapped his legs around him, just enjoying the closeness. Edward’s face was buried in the crook of John’s neck and John could feel his tears running across his shoulder and down his neck. “Things aren’t ever going to be the same” Edward croaked, completely destroying any hope John had been holding on to.

John didn’t know what to say, didn’t know how to make it better so instead, he pulled Edward up and just kissed him. Edward deepened the kiss straight away, opening his lips and licking into John’s mouth, his hips picking up movement again.

John hummed into his mouth, both his hands cupping Edward’s cheeks, his thumbs wiping away any stray tears.

Edward’s thrusts got sloppier, out of rhythm and harder, his hand snaking down John’s body to stroke him in time with his hips. John closed his eyes, and held onto Edward, feeling his climax building.

The room was silent, apart from the panting and tiny whimpers and Edward buried his face in John’s shoulder again, biting down on the skin there and making John moan.

Edward was the first to come, closely followed by John. It was amazing, sweet and sad all mixed into one. John let himself go, letting the tears roll down his cheeks as Edward stroked him through his release, pressing kisses all over John’s face, kissing away the tears.

Edward pulled out and John instantly missed it, missed the closeness, missed being connected, literally and figuratively. He flopped down on top of John, both of them sticky but neither of them caring.

“Remember when we first kissed?” Edward asked, his breath on John’s chest giving him goosebumps “like, properly kissed?”

John smiled and nodded. Of course he did, how could he forget? “Four years ago, we were thirteen and you kissed me first” John said “just a peck on the lips, we were too young to really know about proper kissing.” John laughed and so did Edward.

“We were in the garden” Edward added “and you had hurt yourself, doing something stupid” he leaned up to give John a smile before laying back down “what did you do again?”

“I tried to jump the fence and fell face first over it” John said, laughing at the memory.

“Yeah, that’s it!” Edward laughed “stupid.”

“And you came running over, all worried and scared and checked me for any injuries. Then you just kissed me.” John felt the sadness again, tight in his chest.

“You told me that you wanted to kiss me forever.” Edward said, looking back up at John. John looked down at him and smiled, adding “I still do want to kiss you forever Edward.”

John wanted to take away Edward’s sadness and make it all better, he felt helpless and hopeless. “I’m so sorry” he cried “I’ve ruined everything.” Edward crawled up and pulled John against his chest, letting him cry.

“You didn’t. I didn’t mean to blame you, it wasn’t your fault.” Edward hushed. “It’s not going to be forever, things will go back to normal.”

“I’m sorry our first time was so-”

“Perfect.” Edward finished for him “it’s perfect.”

John didn’t want Edward to go back to his bed but he knew why he had to. After hours of lying together, kissing and touching each other, Edward had to leave. John watched him fall asleep from across the room and closed his eyes, not wanting tomorrow to ever arrive.

When John woke up the next morning, Edward’s bed was empty. He could hear noises from downstairs and the smell of toast came filtering through. Not that he was hungry, he felt too sick.

He made his way downstairs after getting dressed into his uniform and joined Edward at the kitchen table while their mum made breakfast.

John avoided looking at Edward. He was too sad and didn’t want their mum picking up on anything.

“Mum” Edward said, as he handed John some buttered toast “something happened at school yesterday.” John’s heart stopped beating. What was he doing?

“I caught my zip in the fabric of my pants” Edward started, making John tense. He was doing it, going with the excuse. “And I couldn’t get it done up and people had noticed and could see my pants” their mother sat down opposite them and John tried his hardest not to look guilty.

“So in the end, I asked John to uncatch it for me, because obviously I trust him so we went into the toilet where no one could see. Anyway, John finally did it but Mr Williams caught us in there and told us off.”

John stared down at his toast, not daring to look up. He wasn’t a good liar and he always thought Edward wasn’t either, but that was apparently wrong.

“Tell you off?” She asked as she bit into her own toast. John saw Edward nod from the corner of eye.

“He said what we were doing was wrong because we’re brothers.” John chanced a look up and saw it dawn on their mother’s face. “What did he think we were doing?” Edward asked, his face one of pure innocence. John looked at him and almost laughed because for fucksake he was good.

“All I wanted was some help and now we’re in trouble” Edward said, his voice distressed and his eyes big.

“Don’t worry about it.” She said “how dare he.”

John could see that she was angry now. “He’s going to call you to tell you about how wrong it is mum but I don’t understand.” Edward added, his fingers lightly touching John’s knee under the table.

“I’ll sort it” she said, her eyes narrowed. “I ought to give him a piece of my mind.”

“Thanks mum.” Edward smiled sweetly and bit into his toast without another word. John felt like he was hyperventilating and quickly excused himself with an excuse of getting his books ready before leaving quickly and going back upstairs.

Edward followed with a grin, kissing John as soon as their door was shut.  "I was up all night planning that" Edward giggled nervously “didn’t think it would work!”

“You’re too much” John smiled, excitement bubbling in his stomach. “I think I’m gonna pass out” he added, sitting on his bed. Edward sat next to him and pulled him into a hug.

“I love you.” He whispered “just, please no more being naughty in public.”

John laughed and nodded. “No more public adventures.” Edward pecked his lips once more before getting up and grabbing his bag.

“Let’s go, we don’t want to miss it when Mr Williams gets shouted at by mum.”

John laughed and followed him out. He felt like the world had been lifted of his shoulders. His fingers brushed Edward’s as they walked out the front door and Edward turned to smile at him. John smiled back, his brain trying not think about what they were going to get up to later that night. After all, that’s what got them into this mess in the first place.

[area50dununiverse]

Angsty smut prompt! Sorry if this is too far don't feel like you have to fill it! But instead of going on X factor John and edward are desperate for fame and become cam boys lol like they live stream themselves kissing or doing dirty stuff or undressing or whatever and their parents find out and are disgusted themselves so they have to move out etc to still be together but have no money so have to keep doing stuff online to get money but they are really ashamed of it and loads of angst!

Hello! Sorry for taking forever!! I got a bit carried away and made it longer and fluffier (and a bit more smutty) than I intended! Hope you like it and I didn’t just get carried away with myself and missed the mark completely!!!! I’m so nervous about this one and I don’t even know why!!

Also, I will fill any prompt, honestly, just ask!

Below as always! xx

It was originally John’s idea. Edward would sit on his bed, watching him from across the room and trying not to laugh. He worked so hard; every night, sitting in front of the webcam, dancing, pouting and taking off clothes. He never really made much money, even though he seemed to have a small following and Edward could see how frustrated he got.

“How else are we gonna become rich and famous?” John would snap when Edward told him to give it up, before turning his cam on and going into performance mode. He was naturally flirty and charming so Edward could see the appeal. Of corse, John had lied when he signed up, saying that he was eighteen; although they were still six months away from actually turning eighteen.

It was purely an accident when Edward got into the shot. John had re-positioned the cam, not realising that Edward’s bed was in view until the messages came trickling in. ‘You have a twin?’ The first one said followed by 'that’s so hot’.John had laughed and reached forward to move the camera when someone popped up saying how sexy it was that Edward laid there and watched John perform his cam shows.Edward sat up and started reading the messages beside a half-naked John, one hand on his bare shoulder.

He found it funny yet strangely exciting as John’s credits started going up with requests for Edward to join the shows. John started to shake his head; telling them, no, but Edward put his hand on John’s to shut him up before pulling his t-shirt off, over his head with a smile.John looked at him with a slight frown as he covered the microphone. “You don’t have to-”“I want to” Edward smiled “how else are we gonna become rich and famous?”

John smirked before turning back to the camera and uncovering the microphone, “okay, but he’s special so pay up if you want him to take any more clothes off.”Edward watched the credits raise and giggled while he slowly undid his jeans. John watched him, looking amused and mumbling “you’re a natural” and that’s how they both became camboys.

They became popular, but as not as popular as most cam workers and it still frustrated them. The money trickled in but they spent it as fast as they earned it. They wanted more popularity, more views and ultimately, more money. They would start the shoes fully clothed and finish them in their tiny briefs, sometimes even without them when they dared to go fully naked.It was fun and Edward had to admit that he loved the attention, loved to hear exactly what people wanted to do to him and just how they wanted him. John would sometimes put viewers in their places, snapping at the more derogatory comments and protecting Edward.

That’s how Edward gained the 'twink’ label. Someone had sent a message about Edward being John’s twink and after he had googled it to find out what it was, he naturally slipped into the role of cute and sweet. John would put a protective arm around him or grabbed him while they danced and the viewers would love it. Comments would steam through, telling them to kiss or touch and they were so close to it a few times that Edward’s breath hitched in his throat.

They eventually kissed one night when someone offered them extra money. It wasn’t strange or unnatural, just a kiss with John which, to Edward, actually made sense to share his first kiss with the one person he trusted. It was soft and slow, chaste and sweet but as the laptop chimed with another message asking for more, John was quick to deepen the kiss.

Edward worried that they might be doing it wrong, but the viewing numbers went up as well as their credits, so Edward made a show of licking into John’s mouth and twirling their tongues together. John made a small noise as Edward dominated the kiss, pushing into the kiss; too wrapped up in it to notice the messages coming in.

“You’re not supposed to be the forceful one,” John mumbled when they finally pulled apart. “They’re saying you’re my twink, I’m supposed to dominate you.”Edward gave the camera a sweet smile just as a message popped up for John to punish him. They laughed and John grabbed Edward’s chin with his hand, this thumb and fingers swishing his cheeks and making him pout before he roughly pulled him into a crushing kiss. Edward could hear their credits popping up.

They performed every night and gained quite a following. They were in a routine of disappearing upstairs as soon as they had eaten dinner, locking themselves in their room and turning on the laptop. No one bothered them, their parents were used to them spending all their time alone so didn’t ever question it.Edward would recognise the usernames and the big tippers. They knew when, what and how to do stuff to make money. More and more requests starting coming in and it was Edward’s idea to up their game. It was like an addiction, the comments, being wanted and lusted over and Edward wanted to keep that. So John agreed; they had to be more sexual, maybe do more than kissing. Edward was excited and he could see John was too.

“Okay,” John smiled brightly at the camera “today, we’re doing something extra special.” Edward sat behind him on his right side and rested his chin on John’s shoulder, looking perfectly sweet. “We’re taking a request from one lucky viewer!” John said, “we will do whatever the highest  bidder wants us to.” John practically purred before adding a quick “within reason.”

The messages came flooding in and so did the credits. Edward scanned the comments over John’s shoulder and huffed out a laugh. What was so sexy about twins anyway?

They got all the way up to £200 when the credits finally stopped rolling in. Edward gripped onto John’s arm, excitement bubbling in his chest. “Lucky you, Mr-” John hesitated at the username on screen before finishing his sentence with a laugh, “Mr Come-Guzzler-2017!” Edward huffed out another laugh and waited for the reply. He was suddenly nervous. He had no idea what this man wanted them to do and as the message came in Edward suddenly thought that they should have at least practised before going online.

“I bet your twink loves sucking your cock,” John read out loud “let us all watch him swallow.” John side-eyed Edward and Edward gave him a subtle nod that he knew only John would pick up on. He knelt in front of John while John repositioned the camera and pulled down his tight, black pants. John’s breathing was shaky as Edward threw his underwear off to the side.

John was already getting hard, which was a little intimidating; staring down at something that couldn’t possibly fit in your mouth. Edward opened his mouth and looked up at John’s face, holding eye contact as he took the tip between his lips. John made a long low sound that seemed to rumble through his body as Edward sucked, inching down further.

Afterwards, when Edward read through the viewer comments, he realised that everyone loved the eye contact between them while Edward blew John. Edward was glad it came across as sexy because the only reason he was looking up to John was for comfort, reassurance and for a boost of confidence.

John moaned and groaned, his hips twitching on a few occasions and making Edward heave. He could feel dribble running down his chin and his eyes were watering from when he gagged. John was stroking his hands through Edward’s hair, watching closely and he felt safe, like it was the most natural thing to be doing. He could feel himself getting hard and inwardly cursed his body.

Edward only remembered that he had to swallow right before John came and panicked a bit. From the things he had seen, it wasn’t supposed to taste nice and he didn’t want to fuck it up right at the crucial point. John’s fingers tightened in his hair, his breathing unsteady and his hips rising from the chair. Edward braced his hands on John’s hips and sank down, his eyes streaming as John hit the back of his throat, trying his best to swallow him down, pushing John over the edge while he did it.

John came loudly and Edward prayed that no one in the house had heard, his thoughts lost as he desperately tried to swallow John’s come, some of it running down his chin and onto his chest. John was still stroking his hair, looking down at him with big eyes and a smile as Edward sucked off.He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and wrinkled his nose at the bitter taste. John was typing a goodbye message before he signed out and closed the laptop, flopping back in his chair, looking blissed out.

Edward sat himself up on the edge of the bed, tracing his tongue around the inside of his mouth and tasting John. John looked at Edward and smiled before asking “want me to do you?” In such a casual tone, It took Edward a few seconds to actually understand what he meant. He looked at the laptop and frowned. “We’re not online though?”“So?” John shrugged “it’s for you, no one else.” Edward flicked his eyes away from John’s and gave a quick nod because really, there was nothing in the world he wanted more.John just smiled brightly before getting to his knees in front of him and pulling on his pants. Edward lifted his hips in order for John to remove them, and John went straight to work; taking Edward in his mouth and sinking down.

It was wet and warm and Edward thought he was going to come as soon as John’s lips were around him. John gagged and Edward hummed, his eyes falling shut. He thought about when he had gagged while he was doing it to John and how annoyed he felt by it. What he didn’t realise was how good it felt when you’re on the receiving end; John’s throat contracting around him, producing more saliva, making it wetter and ten times better.John sucked back up, stopping only half way before sinking back down, determined to bottom out. He gagged again and it was the best thing Edward had ever felt.

John sucked back up and Edward moved his hand from where it was resting on John’s shoulder, stroking up his arm and cupping his cheek. John looked up at him while slowly sinking down and Edward could feel his mouth filling up, could feel himself sliding into his mouth. Edward slid his hand down, tracing the tight seal of John’s lips with his index finger, feeling himself tightly engulfed by his lips. He bit his lip and whimpered as John sucked back up, Edward’s finger still resting on John’s bottom lip. Edward came suddenly and harder than ever before, his hips bucking up into John’s face, everything around him disappearing for a few seconds of pure bliss. John swallowed just like Edward had done for him and when Edward opened his eyes, he was looking up at him and licking his lips.

He couldn’t breathe or even think, all he could do was take in how debauched John looked. His lips were plumper than usual, shiny and red, almost like he was wearing lipstick. His eyes were glistening and his hair was sticking up in all directions and all Edward wanted to do was kiss him.

“Everything okay boys?”Edward’s head snapped towards the door at the sound of their mother’s voice. He had never been so glad that they had a lock on the door.“Yeah, Edward’s just messing around,” John called with a smirk, his voice rougher than usual, hoarse. “Sorry, we’ll keep it down,” John added and Edward thought he could listen to his rough voice all night.“Okay, get some sleep now.” Their mum said through the door “night.”

Edward heard her footsteps pad away before her bedroom door closed. John stood up and pulled Edward by his hand, pulling him up and leading him to John’s bed. Edward got in, followed by John and they wrapped themselves around each other, fitting perfectly against one another and that’s how their relationship changed.

They spent every night together from then on, John’s bed becoming their bed, Edward’s bed becoming a spare. Edward could spend hours at a time kissing John. He loved his lips and the way they felt against his own. Sometimes John would just randomly kiss him, even if he was half way through a sentence, but Edward didn’t mind because he would simply melt against him.It was on one of these nights, just after their eighteenth birthday, that John told him that he loved him. Edward wasn’t really working too hard on kissing John, he was just laying there letting John kiss him, just enjoying the feel of his lips when John pulled back and smiled. “I love you,” John whispered, his eyes burning into Edward’s.

“I love you too,” Edward returned straight away, leaning up to connect their lips again.“No,” John said, “this isn’t like every other time I’ve said that, it’s different.”Edward smiled, his stomach fluttering. “I’m in love with you too,” Edward said back before pressing his lips to John’s and kissing him.

They had done everything they could do without actually having full on sex. Edward’s favourite night being the one where John taught him what a sixty-nine was; laying flat on his back and positioning Edward on all fours above him.They wouldn’t do these things on cam, both of them preferring to save these moments for themselves.They would kiss and suck each other off for the camera but didn’t want to take it any further. There was a time when John had spanked Edward because a viewer had paid them enough for Edward to actually agree.

Edward positioned himself on all fours, holding onto the headboard and dipping his back, creating the perfect arch accentuating the curve of his arse. John had hovered behind for a moment or two, before hesitantly and very gently smacking him. Edward groaned loudly, just for the sake of the camera.John soon got into though and suddenly Edward’s moans and groans were as real as the red hand marks covering his arse cheeks.Much to Edward’s surprise, he had loved it; so much so, that as soon as the camera was shut down for the night, he was pushing John down roughly and fingering him hard and fast, making him come within minutes.

Edward spent all day looking forward to when they could lock themselves away. They stopped doing shows every night, only really doing them when they remembered to, but even then, Edward didn’t feel like it was as fun. John would get even more protective over him and had snapped the laptop shut in the middle of a show in a temper, on a few occasions.“I don’t think we should do shows anymore,” John said after one particularly demeaning comment towards Edward. “I don’t like people looking at you like that, I want to be the only one that gets you see you like this-” John gestured to Edward’s naked body and stepped forward “I don’t like people speaking to you like that.”

Edward smiled at him and nodded. “We won’t do any more shows.” He said before kissing him. Edward felt John relax against him and held him tight, grateful that he had John looking out for him. “Love you” Edward whispered, his stomach fluttering as John said it back.John didn’t wait to close their account, opening the laptop and doing it as soon as Edward let go of him. He didn’t post a goodbye message or give any explanation and Edward felt a wave of relief wash over him as the account was deactivated.

Two weeks later, they were called downstairs by a very angry sounding dad. When they got to the kitchen they saw their mum sat at the table with her laptop open, their dad standing behind her, not looking at them. Edward gave John a confused look which John returned before asking, “what’s wrong?”Their mum looked up at them, tears in her eyes. “Can you please explain this?” She gritted out, pressing the space key on the laptop and turning it to face them.A video of the two of them filled the screen, Edward, on his knees, sucking John while looking at the camera; John’s moans and groans filling the air around them. Edward’s heart stopped beating, he felt sick and quickly grasped John’s hand in his.

She stopped the video and put her head in her hands. “It’s not how you think it is,” John spoke up, his voice shaky. “We only did it for a little while-”“It’s wrong!” Their mum shouted, slamming the laptop shut. “The link was sent to me this afternoon and I opened it to see…” she cut off, looking away from them both. Edward swallowed down the lump in his throat and looked at his shoes.“We’re sorry that we filmed it,” John said, Edward, standing frozen to the spot beside him. “But not that we did it.” Edward looked at John, who was looking straight at their parents, standing tall and confident. Edward just felt like crying.

“What?” Their dad piped up, putting his hand around their mum for support.“Me and Edward, we love each other and it’s not wrong,” John said evenly, making their parents look like they were going to explode.“You’re brothers!” Their mum said, getting to her feet “it ends now.”

Edward gripped onto John’s hand. No one was going to split them. “No,” John said, “I love him and we’re going to be together.” Edward stared harder at the floor, wondering if he should say something. But what? He couldn’t speak, couldn’t get his brain engaged; all he could do was pray that John didn’t let go of him.

“Then leave.”Edward’s head snapped up at that, looking at his mum. “If you want to-” she cut off with a sigh before saying “You’re not doing it under my roof, so get out.”“Fine.” Edward heard John say before he was being dragged back upstairs, his brain trying to catch up on what was happening.He watched John angrily stuff clothes into a bag, cramming as much as he could into the holdall before putting the laptop inside and zipping it up. He caught Edward’s eye and froze, his face sad. “Is this what you want?” He whispered, “if not, just say and it can be over, we can stay here and not be-”“I choose you” Edward quickly said “always.” John smiled and stepped forward to kiss him before taking his hand and marching him down the stairs, straight out the front door and slamming it behind them.

They walked hand in hand for a little while, John leading Edward into town. Edward didn’t care that they were holding hands and no one even paid them any mind. He guessed that to outsiders, they just looked like two twin brothers; one making the other hurry by pulling him along. He still felt like he was going to cry, anger, sadness but also immense pride and love for john, bubbling inside of him. They had never been alone before, never had to be independent or look after themselves and Edward wasn’t sure how they would cope. They would look after each other, Edward knew that and he had a feeling they would be okay.

“Wait here,” John said softly, putting their bag down and going to the atm. The thought occurred to Edward that they probably didn’t have a lot of money left and he wondered where they would stay. Family members were off the cards.“Is it bad?” Edward asked as soon as John got back, putting their card back in his pocket and looking stressed.“It’ll be okay,” he said forcing a smile and Edward thanked God for him for trying to protect him from reality. “No five-star hotels though.” He laughed making Edward smile.

John took his phone out and mumbled something about finding a place to stay while Edward waited, looking around at the passing people. “Here’s one we can afford,” John said, “it’s the other side of town.” Edward nodded and followed John, letting him take the bag from his hand.

It took half an hour to get there. The building was run down and dirty. Edward soon realised that is was some sort of hostel that was used by drunks. “We only have one room with one double,” the lady that greeted them said. She looked tired but hard, Edward wouldn’t mess with her, he knew that.“That’s fine,” John said, gripping on to Edward’s hand, “we’ll share.”She handed them a key and directed them upstairs, second door on the left. There were only three rooms upstairs, maybe only two downstairs.

They got in and put down their bag, looking at the dull room. There were just a bed and some broken draws and suddenly Edward felt like breaking down. “It’s not too bad,” John said brightly. Edward looked at him before bursting out laughing, laughing so hard that his sides hurt. He figured this was his break down but at least he wasn’t crying.John laughed too and they both ended up standing the middle of the room, holding on to each other and laughing, tears running down their faces.“It’s awful John!” Edward laughed, holding onto him to support his weight.

John stepped over to the door to lock it before opening the window. “Smells in here,” he commented as he pulled the quilt back and frowned down at the stained bed. “Gross.”“We can lay on a towel,” Edward said, his turn to be the optimistic one.“It’s only for tonight, I promise,” John said turning to look at him. “I’m sorry.”“For what?” Edward frowned, brushing the hair from John’s face. John sighed and shrugged so Edward kissed him, “I’m proud of you.” He told him “I’m glad we’re together.” John gave him a sad smile and said “me too” as he kissed him again.

Edward didn’t dare shower that night. The bathroom was shared and it looked like Edward would get out dirtier than he got in, so he skipped it and hurried back to the safety of their room. John was laying in bed when Edward got back so he joined him, laying on the towel that John had laid out. It wasn’t until Edward was in bed that he realised John didn’t have a towel and he had used the only one they had for Edward to lay on. He didn’t say anything, just kissed him.

Edward cuddled up against John, his head on John’s chest and thought about what had happened and what they were going to do. He felt the sadness building again and finally let himself cry. John held him tightly, defiantly staring up at the ceiling as they listened to the sound of people arguing downstairs.

When Edward woke up the next morning, he was alone. He sat up, swinging his legs out of bed and looking at the door. He knew that John had only gone to the bathroom, but he hoped he wasn’t going to be long. The door clicked open and Edward stood up, smiling and saying good morning as John walked in, locking the door behind him. Edward’s smile dropped as soon as he saw John’s ashen face, dark circles around his eyes. He looked like he hadn’t slept a wink and Edward stepped forwards to pull him into a hug.

“Get back to bed and sleep-” Edward hushed “I will stay up and make sure everything is okay.”“I’m fine” John smiled, even though Edward could see otherwise. “We need to go shopping, get some food and I think-” John sighed and bit bottom lip, worrying it between his teeth. “I think we need to stay here another night.”Edward’s heart sank but he couldn’t let John see so he smiled and shrugged. “As long as we’re together I could be anywhere.” He said truthfully.John grabbed their bag on the way out, not wanting to leave anything in the room. Edward was hungry and felt his stomach rumbling as they headed outside, making a quick exit so they wouldn’t meet any of the other occupants.

They went to a cheap supermarket and brought dry noodles and some snacks, doing the sums as they walked around the shop to make sure they weren’t overspending, before going back to their room. Edward fixed them some noodles and while he ate them, John picked at his looking very unsatisfied.“Edward-” John said putting down his bowl, “I think we need to go back online.” Edward paused, mid-spoonful leaving a long noodle hanging from his mouth. He could see why and knew it made sense but he didn’t want to go back to doing that. “We can make some money, get out of here-”“What about mum?” Edward asked, sucking some more noodles into his mouth “what if she sees?”John scoffed and shrugged “you think she’s going to talk to us ever again anyway?” He said, “it won’t make a difference Edward.”

Edward nodded, that sad feeling twisting in his gut again. He didn’t want to think about never talking to their parents again and the image of his mother’s look of disgust flashed behind his eyes. “Okay.” Was all he said concentrating on his noodles to keep himself from crying.“I’m so sorry,” John said, his own voice on the edge of tears “I would do it on my own but we made so much more together and-”“It’s okay, honestly.” Edward looked up and smiled, putting a hand over John’s. John gave him a sympathetic smile and reached for their laptop.“Wait-” Edward ran his fingers through his hair before doing the same to John, wiping away some noodle juice that John had dripped down his chin. “Okay go.”

John opened the site and logged in, re-activating their account. They sat and waited for an hour before someone popped up and Edward recognised the username from last time.John plastered a smile on his face, saying a cheery hello while Edward leant on him just like they used to do. A message popped up saying hello and that the person had missed them so John made some “we’ve been so busy, but we’re back” comment and soon the viewing numbers rose.

Edward was surprised at how quickly he slipped back into it and how comfortable he felt in front of the camera. John took a little while to relax into it but they were soon watching their credits going up as they danced sexily together, John’s hips gyrating against Edward’s from behind. Edward hoped this would mean they could afford a proper hotel or even a bed and breakfast and he did everything he could to be sexy, to try and make things better for them.

They ended the show after three hours and Edward was delighted when he saw how much they had made. John grabbed him and pulled him into a crushing hug while laughing and kissing Edward’s cheek. “We can soon say goodbye to this place!” He smiled “as long as we keep up the shows, I can also look for a job and we’ll be okay!” Edward’s grinned back at him before saying “I love you John” and kissing him on the tip of his nose.

That night didn’t feel too bad. Edward kept reminding himself that it was short term and they wouldn’t have to stay there for much longer. There was more arguing coming from downstairs. Edward could hear things being thrown against walls, every bang and crash startling him and making him flinch. John gave his a squeeze every time, letting him know that he was there and nothing was going to hurt him.They considered doing another show but Edward wasn’t in the mood, couldn’t bring himself to even get up. He just wanted to lay with John, let John hold him and press firm kisses to the top of his head.

They performed the next morning not long after they had woken up. John was grumpy and Edward had a feeling he hadn’t slept again. Edward woke up and turned to face him, before pressing small kisses to his face and chest, his hand gripping John firmly, intent on making him relax a little. He wanted to give John a moment where he didn’t have to think, didn’t have to worry and as John came, his eyes screwed shut and long moans falling from his slack lips, it was a relief for Edward too.

John climbed on top of Edward and started grinding down on him while Edward quickly pressed the laptop to go live. John was focused on nothing else but Edward, huffing out little breaths next to Edward’s ear and groaning quietly.Edward arched up into John and moaned, needing John to go harder and faster but also needing it to last as long as possible for the viewers. The laptop was chiming and John acknowledged it for the first time, sitting himself up so he wasn’t completely covering Edward. He swirled his hips, slowly, teasingly and Edward groaned loudly, his hips bucking up against John. Edward wanted to be inside, to fuck him but he didn’t want to do something so personal whilst online. He wanted to keep sex special, intimate and loving; not for people to get off to.

Edward came without warning, hard and hot against John, John following a few seconds later for the second time that morning. Edward pulled himself up to check the laptop and felt his heart stop as he looked at the credits. “John” he mumbled, nudging him “look.”John sat up and gave a lazy smile, his breaths coming in little puffs. “You guys are the best” he smiled as he addressed the viewers and Edward smiled too. They stayed for a bit longer chatting to the viewers before logging off. Edward was excited and bounced around the room as he got dressed with John watching him from the bed an easy smile on his face.

It took a few hours for the money to clear which they spent looking for somewhere to stay. Renting was still out of the question so they looked at budget hotels and b&bs. Edward fell in love with a traditional bed and breakfast complete with rose bushes and a little old lady who owned it so John booked them in, earning an excited kiss and a high five.“Oh my God, she has dogs!” Edward smiled as he scrolled through the photos “and we will have our own bathroom!” John didn’t say anything, just watched him with a smile.

Edward pounced on the bed and wrapped himself up in the many blankets that were draped over the double.The lady, who they had nicknamed Mrs Potts, had tried to talk them into a double room with two singles but John politely insisted they shared, earning a strange look in return. He eventually told her that he suffered from nightmares and Edward had to be close to wake him up and cue the forty-five minute long conversation about her daughter’s terrible nightmares when she was a kid.Edward liked her right away, the sadness creeping in as he thought about their nan and whether she would ever talk to them again.

John headed for the bathroom and ran the shower, stripping off and leaving a trail of clothes in his wake. “What time are we going online?” Edward asked from underneath a big floral throw.“After dinner?” John called from the shower and Edward nodded, even though John was in another room.“It smells like fresh sheets in here,” John said as he walked out of the bathroom, fully naked and dripping.“That’s because it’s clean.” Edward watched John approach and lifted the throw for him to get under.

“This was the best idea you’ve had,” John said as he wrapped himself around Edward. Edward held John’s hands against his chest, pressing his back against John’s chest. John entwined their legs and Edward felt his breath steady against the back of his neck. Edward let John sleep, trying not to move too much but he soon became bored with no one to talk to and his thoughts wandered. He thought about his family and wondered if they missed them.No one had tried to call and Edward wondered whether they should try calling home. Maybe that’s what their family were waiting for, John and Edward to call first.

Edward would choose John over anything in the world and he didn’t regret leaving but he missed home and he really missed their mum. The realisation hit Edward, that even if they patched things up with their parents, things would never be the same again. They would have still left home, with probably no chance of going back and everyone would still know about his and John’s relationship. Edward wondered if their parents had told anyone else, and if not what reason they would have given for the babies of the family leaving home so suddenly.

“Are you crying?” John stirred from behind Edward, sitting up on his elbow to look at him. Edward hadn’t even realised that he was crying and wiped his face.“Sorry, I-”“Don’t say sorry,” John soothed, pulling him around to face him “is it home?”Edward nodded and closed his eyes against the tears. “I was just thinking about everyone and that they hate us now, our own parents hate us.”“They don’t hate us, they’ll cool down,” John whispered but he was lying, Edward could tell.“They haven’t even called. Anything could’ve happened to us and they don’t care.” Edward cried against John’s shoulder. John stroked Edward’s hair, his fingers getting caught in the wax Edward had styled his hair with two mornings ago.“We’ll be okay. I’ll look after you Ed, I promise.”

Edward looked up at John and smiled. There was something about John that made him smile even in the saddest moments and all Edward could put it down to was just how happy John made him; how much he loved and trusted him. Edward leant up to kiss John’s minty lips and wished he had showered too. He pushed John back and straddled his hips, leaning over him to kiss him.John returned the kiss, slow and sweet. There was no rush and they felt safe where they were. Edward climbed off John and quickly stripped his clothes off before getting back into his lap and reconnecting their lips.

John whimpered, his hips pushing up into Edward’s and making him moan quietly. “Fingers,” Edward whispered, knowing what he needed. John complied, sucking his fingers into his mouth to wet them before trailing them down to Edward’s entrance and circling. Edward grunted, pushing back on John’s digits, silently asking.John slipped in his index finger, making Edward moan as he pushed himself down, circling his hips and licking into John’s mouth.

Their kisses became sloppy and open-mouthed, John adding another finger; adding one more after a while more. Edward lifted himself up before pushing back down onto John’s fingers, his lips never leaving John’s. Edward had forgotten everything, in that moment, all that mattered was John and Edward couldn’t help but think he was all that mattered in every moment.

Edward spat on his hand before reaching behind himself to grasp John, slicking him up before guiding him to where his fingers were buried inside of him. John’s eyes widened as he realised where Edward was heading. “Are you sure?” He breathed “we don’t have to-”“I’m ready.” Edward gritted out. He had never been so sure of anything in his life and as John pulled his fingers out, he lifted himself up and positioned himself before sinking down onto John. John made a noise like no other Edward had ever heard and it was probably the best sound he had ever heard in his life.

Edward sucked a breath between his teeth at the sudden stretch and was glad John was always slow with his fingers. Edward bottomed out and let out a long whine. He felt full, like John’s delicate fingers had been replaced with a fist, but it was a good feeling. John was holding his breath underneath him, his chest and cheeks flushed and eyes screwed closed. “Don’t… Move…” He panted, making Edward smile. Edward wondered what John was thinking about to stop himself from losing it too soon. It was usually the memory of him accidentally walking in on a naked teacher while at boarding school, her old saggy body always working to defuse the situation.

“John..” Edward breathed, desperate now “please?” John opened his eyes and gave a short nod, giving the go ahead. Edward experimentally lifted his hips a little before sinking down again, lifting a little bit more the next time.John could hardly breathe and Edward knew he had to make it quick to get the best out of it before John came so started bouncing slightly.It was better than Edward had ever imagined it to be and suddenly it got a lot better as John hit his prostate, sending sparks through his body. Edward went harder, faster, needing more and hitting the same spot over and over before he was coming messily over John, moaning John’s name like some sort of mantra, not caring who heard.John came more or less at the same time which Edward felt inside of him and it just added to his climax.

Edward flopped down on top of John, gasping for breath. His hair was sticking to his forehead and he was sweaty and sticky but he didn’t care. “I need another shower now.” John mumbled, “we can’t get the bed messy, imagine poor old Mrs Potts.” Edward chuckled against John’s chest, too out of breath to speak.They lay together for a while until John eventually pushed Edward off and lead him into the bathroom so they could both shower. The water was nice and Edward let John wash him, enjoying the feel of his hands on his skin while stealing kisses.

Edward felt different. Like they werecloser. He felt happier, like he was walking on a cloud and he hated the cliché but he couldn’t compare how he felt with anything else.He wrapped his arms around John’s neck just to touch him, relishing in the full body contact. John was more than happy with the contact, humming into the crook of Edward’s neck where he buried his face.

“I’m hungry,” John mumbled, “can we have dinner?” Edward groaned, the thought of leaving the hot stream of water and letting go of John making him pout. John kissed Edward’s lips quickly as he turned off the water, so Edward got out and wrapped a towel around himself.John lay on the bed eating a packet of crisps, his eyes on Edward while he dressed. “What?” Edward finally smiled, his cheeks pink. He could feel John’s stare and it was making him blush.“I can see why all those men online want you, you’re beautiful,” John told him, his eyes meeting Edward’s.

“They want you too-” Edward said, his cheeks heating up.“Not as much as you. You just have something better and I love it.” John was smiling but Edward didn’t like him talking like that. Edward didn’t want John to feel like he was second best because he was perfect. He didn’t compare to anyone, and Edward had always thought of him as the better-looking twin anyway.“No, I don’t John.” Edward mumbled as he buttoned up his jeans “you’re so much better than me.”Edward knelt on the bed and helped himself to one of John’s crisps.

“I don’t want to go online” John mumbled, “I don’t like doing it.”“Me neither” Edward sighed “but it’s just temporary.” John nodded and reached for the laptop, plugging it in on the dresser and positioning it. Edward huffed. All he wanted to do was hang around with John, he didn’t want to be sexy or get paid for strangers to look at his body and he certainly didn’t want strangers looking at John.John logged on and they waited for viewers to join, feeling flat. Edward had felt so happy, so relaxed but as he watched himself on the screen, all he could think about was how they got into this mess in the first place.

John’s eyes were focusing somewhere to the left of the laptop and Edward wondered if it was because he couldn’t bring himself to look at them both on the screen.The laptop chimed, letting them know that they had viewers and John’s wide smile was back in seconds as he looked at the screen and greeted the people logging in.

They didn’t make as much money as earlier that day but Edward knew they had enough for their room. A few people logged out, telling them that they weren’t as bubbly as they normally were. Edward wanted to flick the finger and tell them to fuck off and never come back but he knew he couldn’t, after all, these people were keeping a roof over their heads.John shut the laptop and flopped down on the bed with a sigh, pulling the floral throw up over his bare chest. Edward watched him for a moment, wanting to say something but it knowing what.

“Does it make you feel dirty?” John asked after a while. Edward shrugged. He wanted to say yes but didn’t want to make John feel worse. “It was fun before,” John said, “but now it feels dirty like we are making something dirty out of what we have.” Edward got the feeling that John wasn’t really talking to him, just voicing his feelings so he didn’t speak.“Like people get off watching us, does that freak you out?” John’s eyes met Edward’s for the first time so Edward gave a nod. “Why isn’t it fun anymore?”

Edward got into bed beside John and rested his head on his shoulder. He wanted to tell him that it wouldn’t be forever, it was only until they find their feet and get a job but Edward wasn’t sure if he believed it himself.

John was still in a bad mood when they woke up the next morning. He was quiet as he dressed, his face flat. Edward didn’t know what to do, John was always the one that made him feel better. He was the one that kept his spirits up no matter what and Edward couldn’t stand the thought of John being so unhappy. They dressed in silence.They had to be out of their room for 10 am so Mrs Potts could clean it, so they headed into town.Edward was nervous, just in case they bumped into any of their family. He didn’t say anything though, just walked close to John, their arms bumping against each other’s as they walked.John had started to relax; chatting and smiling which made Edward relax.

They went into a few shops and Edward was excited to actually buy a few things. They didn’t buy anything special or expensive, but it made Edward feel normal, like they hadn’t just been disowned and made homeless.They were walking through the shopping centre when John stopped to get them both a smoothie. Edward wanted to wait outside because the smoothie place was too busy so John gave him the bag he was carrying and disappeared.Edward wandered to the next shop to look in the window. It was a jeweller and Edward scanned over all the sparkles, none of it really impressing him.

“Hey!” Edward jumped at the sudden voice and turned to find a man walking towards him. “Hey! Edward? It’s Edward isn’t it?” The man smiled, stepping close. Edward frowned and nodded, his brain trying to work out if he knew him.“Hey” Edward mumbled feeling awkward and wishing John would hurry up.“I love you, you’re my favourite one,” the man said, his eyes running over Edward’s body and his tongue swiping across his bottom lip. He was tall and Edward felt himself shrink down a little. “You’re so innocent and soft.” He whispered, leaning in a bit too close, making Edward back up into the jeweller’s window. The man’s hand reached out and Edward wanted to run but he couldn’t.

“Don’t touch him.” Edward heard as John appeared out of nowhere, grabbing the man’s wrist and pushing it away. Edward breathed a sigh of relief, stepping behind John.“You’re both here!” The man smiled, obviously unfazed by John’s fiery eyes. He turned around to another man who was waiting for him and smiled before calling “look it’s the twins who fuck each other online!” At the top of his voice.Edward ducked further behind John, wanting the ground to just swallow him up. A few people glanced their way but Edward didn’t dare meet their eyes.

“Shut the fuck up” John hissed, “we do not fuck online, we never have and what gives you the right to come over and try touch my-” John cut himself off and Edward’s heart sank a little. Was John too ashamed to call him his brother? “Now fuck off.” John snapped making the man step away, having the cheek to actually look offended. John stared him down until the finally left and turned to Edward looking concerned.

“Are you okay? Did he touch you?” John asked, handing Edward a smoothie from the cardboard cup holder.Edward shook his head “no, you got here just in time. Thanks.” He mumbled, his heart racing. He flicked his eyes around the shopping centre, embarrassed and ashamed of himself. That horrible twisting sadness was back in force and he couldn’t quite catch his breath. He could see passing people looking at them, judging them. What if they recognised them too? Edward didn’t want to be knowing a low rent slut that ducks his brother for cash. He suddenly felt faint.

John met his eyes and put his hand on his back saying “Okay?” And Edward didn’t know so he just nodded and started to walk, needing some fresh air, his feet taking him away. John followed as Edward weaved his way through the people, desperate to get to the exit and praying the man wasn’t following them. God, what if he found out where they were staying? What if he did follow them?

“Are you ashamed of me?” Edward asked as soon as they were outside. John turned and frowned at him, looking taken aback and Edward almost wished he hadn’t said anything.“Never!” John stressed, “what would make you ever think that Edward?” Edward gave a one shoulder shrug, knowing full well he was sulking but not caring. “Why didn’t you call me your brother?” Edward asked quietly “when you were telling that man, you told him not to touch your…” Edward fixed John with a dirty look “you couldn’t even say it. someone recognised us and you were ashamed.”

John’s face fell at Edward’s words, breaking into a little smile. “Is that what this is about?” John asked looking slightly amused. Edward didn’t want to answer, so he turned away. “You know why I didn’t finish?” John said softly, stepping towards Edward and pulling him by his hand. “Because I almost said 'don’t touch my boyfriend’ and that would’ve looked strange.”Edward’s head snapped up, his eyes meeting John’s. He had never thought of that and now John had said it, his stomach was doing that fluttering thing again and he felt giddy. “Really?” Edward smiled, feeling just a little stupid for sulking. John nodded and kissed his cheek before pulling him in for a hug.“You had me so worried.” He mumbled into Edward’s hair.

“Can we go back to Mrs Potts’ now?” Edward asked as John let him go. They started to walk in silence, Edward’s mind running over John’s words again and again. It was a strange situation to be in. When had John stopped thinking of him as a brother? Edward loved being a twin, loved being John’s other half but he was now also his other half in terms of a relationship. This didn’t mean that they weren’t still brothers though and Edward couldn’t decide if that made it better or worse.

“We don’t have to go online tonight.” John said after a while, a welcome destruction from Edward’s own thoughts.“Are you kidding?” Edward smiled “I love Mrs Potts’ place and I’m not leaving, so unless you have a load of money you haven’t told me about, we’re going live.”John smiled but Edward could see the concern behind it, the worry in his green eyes. John didn’t say anything though and they continued on in silence.

“Hi” John smiled at the camera later that evening, “the strangest thing happened today,” Edward flicked his eyes towards John. This wasn’t planned.“A fan of ours recognised us in the street!” The messages came popping up, most of them along the lines of 'I wish I could meet you’ and 'I bet you looked so sexy in person’ but John ignored them. “He came up and started harassing us, shouting our business for the world to hear…”

Edward read the messages as they came in, all outraged and sticking up for them. Edward didn’t think for one second that they were sincere; anyone of these viewers would do the same. “-and I just want to let you all know that if you do happen to see us around, say hi, give us a wave and politely move on or we will never do another show again.” John’s voice was calm, even with a hint of anger.The messages all supported them and Edward was glad John set the rules, told them where they stood. He suddenly had the urge to jump John and fuck him but knew he couldn’t. He groaned and someone commented on Edward being 'ready for action’, making John look down at his lap with a smirk. “Patience,” John mumbled and Edward huffed.

The next day, John went out without Edward. He said they needed more food and Edward told him that he was too comfy to get up. He didn’t tell him that he was scared he would see that man again. He didn’t tell him that he was too embarrassed to leave the safety of their room.Mrs Potts was kind enough to let them stay in their room all day even though the rules stated to be out by 10 am and not back until 3 pm. She liked them and Edward loved how sweet she was and he knew john had a soft spot for her too.

So Edward stayed in bed while John headed out, warm and content in bed. Their phone rang and Edward frowned as he leant over to answer it, seeing that it was home calling. “Hello?” He answered nervously, his voice unsteady.“Edward?” Edward started crying as soon as he heard his mums voice. He wanted John to be there and he wanted his mum. “How are you both?” She asked, her own voice quivering.“Good” Edward answered, instead of telling her how really was. “how are you?”“Are you eating well? Staying safe?” She pressed, ignoring his question. Edward smiled and told her about Mrs Potts and the rose bushes, leaving out the parts about their webcam shows and being harassed.

“I’m glad you’re okay” she sighed, sounding sad “maybe we can try and call once a week to start?” Edward’s heart sank a little but he was also hopeful that they were willing to start fixing things.“Sounds good,” Edward said, hearing the school bell ring in the background.“I have to go and teach, love you. Tell John I love him.”“Okay, love you too,” Edward mumbled, feeling sad as he hung up. He sat in bed for a while before getting up and venturing downstairs.

He found Mrs Potts in the garden doing some weeding and walked over. “Can I help?” He asked, kneeling beside her and pulling on a dandelion.“That would be lovely” Mrs Potts smiled so Edward set to work, telling her all about the call from his mum and how he thought she hated them but leaving out the parts where he and John were more than just brothers.

Edward was washing his hands when John returned, an excited smile on his face. “Guess who got a job!” He shouted before looking at the mud and frowning “why are you so dirty?”“Oh my god, what job?” Edward asked, turning to face him while he rinsed his hands.“A cafe was looking for staff so I went in and they said I could start tomorrow!” John grinned “I told you that I would look after you.”

Edward jumped on John, wrapping him tightly in his arms and kissing his lips, maybe a bit too hard. “I’m so happy for you!” Edward beamed as he kissed him again.“So why are you dirty?” John asked again, making Edward shift on his feet.“I helped Mrs Potts in the garden. Her name is Rose, hence all the roses.” Edward said before adding “mum called.”

John’s smile was gone in a flash and Edward wanted to eat his words and forget it ever happened. “She wants to call us once a week, start talking again and take it from there. She told me to tell you that she loves you.”John wordlessly nodded, using a washcloth to clean up Edward’s muddy fingerprints from the sink.“That’s good… Isn’t it?” Edward tried to gauge John’s reaction but couldn’t.“Yeah” John finally smiled “yeah it is.” Edward knew that John was only saying it for his benefit so he dropped the subject.“Where’s the cafe?” He smiled, walking John back into their room and sitting on the bed. John told him about the cafe, his eyes lighting up and Edward only half listened, the other half of him relishing in John’s happiness.

The next morning, John was up and out early, leaving Edward alone in bed. He kissed Edward goodbye, which Edward had made him promise he would do the night before. John didn’t want to wake him but Edward wanted him to say goodbye.“Good luck” Edward stirred, stretching as he smiled up at John. “I’ll miss you.”“I’ll miss you too,” John told him before giving him another kiss. “Love you.” Edward heard him whisper just before the door closed. Edward couldn’t get back to sleep without John. He always felt too alone without John beside him and although he was happy for him, a small part of him wished he hadn’t got a job.

Edward got up and dressed before going downstairs to where Mrs Potts was making breakfast for the guests. “Can I help?” Edward asked, just like he had the day before and just like she had the day before, Mrs Potts gave him a kind smile and found him something to do.“Did you tell your brother about your mother’s call?” She asked as Edward whisked some eggs.“We didn’t really talk about it, he froze up.” Edward told her “I don’t think he wants to talk to her. He’s angry.”Mrs Potts moved around the kitchen like it was a complex dance, gracefully moving from one thing to another, perfectly timed. “I don’t know what happened between you two and your parents, but I do know they are a precious thing and if you can, you should make amends.”

Edward nodded, looking at the bowl in his hand. He had no idea what he was even doing and hoped that there wasn’t a wrong way to whisk eggs. “I want too, but John… I’mNot sure.” Edward said, whisking faster.“He’ll come around. Some people just need more time to heal.” She took the eggs from him and Edward felt a sense of pride when she told him that he had done well, even if all he did was mix a few eggs. “Can you go and take orders?” She asked, handing him a paper pad and a pencil. Edward smiled and nodded, taking the paper and going into the dining room.

He enjoyed helping with breakfast service. Mrs Potts had him taking out the plates and collecting the dirty ones and Edward felt helpful and needed. He wondered how John was getting on and felt that familiar flutter in his stomach. He couldn’t wait to see him again.“Thank you for your help sweetie,” Mrs Potts said, interrupting his thoughts “the help was gratefully received.”Edward gave her a smile but didn’t take off his apron. “I’ll help with the rooms?” He offered, hoping she wasn’t sick of him yet. She just smiled and handed him a duster.

That’s how he ended up perfecting the art of making a bed and cleaning a toilet. As they cleaned out the last room, Edward ended up telling her about the nickname she had been given after accidentally calling her Mrs Potts. “From Beaty and the Beast?” She asked and Edward nodded with a grin, making her laugh.

“Your brother has a job now doesn’t he?” She asked as they put away the cleaning supplies. “What time does he finish?”“Three” Edward sighed. It felt like a lifetime away.“Then how about you work here for me? Finish at three.” Mrs Potts suggested as she turned to Edward.“Really? You want me to work for you?” Edward smiled, excitement bubbling in his chest.“I’m getting too old to do this alone. You’re a natural.” She smiled as they walked back to the kitchen “I can’t afford a full wage, but you and John can have your room free of charge for as long as you need and I will pay you the rest in wages, how about that?”

Edward took a breath to calm himself but it didn’t work as he let a few tears slip before pulling her into a hug. “Thank you so much, Mrs Potts.” He cried as she hugged him back. He had missed this kind of hug. It was so different to John’s hugs, it was maternal and gentle.“You’re both very sweet boys.” She said, rubbing his back.

Edward watched the door excitedly. As soon as it opened, he was up and pouncing on John asking him how his day was. John looked happy and smiled the whole way through telling Edward about his day. Edward hung on every word, pleased to finally have him back.“I got a job too, you’re gonna love it,” Edward told him before telling him about Mrs Potts’ and her offer. John’s eyes sparkled in a way Edward hadn’t seen for so long and he leant in to kiss him, Edward could feel the sparkle in the kiss.“You told me everything would work out.” Edward mumbled against him “you promised me and it has.”

“No more cam shows.” John told him “we don’t need to do it anymore Edward.” John said as he held Edward close. Edward felt that same flutter again and squeezed John.“I’m glad we’re together.” He said, “I love you.”“I love you too,” John said before kissing the top of Edward’s hair. He closed his eyes and held onto John. He felt happy and positive, like things were truly going to be okay. John’s breathing evened out and Edward could tell he had fallen asleep and as he lay against him, he couldn’t help but think that they had made it. They had proved to the world that all they needed was each other and they can get through anything.

[area50dununiverse]

Hopefully posting my new j+e fic soon(ish)

and it's a long one!

[area50dununiverse]

Thank you for my prompts ❤️

Okay... I've been watching Eurovision so I have only just started one fic. Tomorrow, I will sit and FOCUS and write and get my flow back... Jedcest style 😘 I love you Anons ❤️

[area50dununiverse]

Prompt (if your comfortable) John feels pressured to lose his virginity b/c of constant questions in interviews so he does it with a random boy who he doesnt really like but feels like he has to do it. he thinks about Edward the whole time. a few days later Liam gives them a talk about it feeling pressured and John bursts out crying admitting everything. Liam tells him it's natural he just wanted to think of someone who would make him feel safe, but John knows he has real feelings for Edward...

Hello lovely! I hope you like it! Sorry it took so long, I accidentally deleted it while editing it. Read below as always! xx

“Do you ever think about having sex Edward?” John asked, looking up from his phone. Edward looked at John with a slight frown, pausing for a moment to think. “Not really” he shrugged turning back to sticking rhinestones on to his blazer. John watched him in silence for a moment before looking back at his phone. “Why?” Edward asked, poking his tongue out as he concentrated. John looked back at the tweet, reading out loud “I bet Jedward are still virgins”. He looked at Edward who didn’t react so he read another one. “Jedward will die virgins.”

Edward chuckled, dropping a few rhinestones. “It’s not funny” John mumbled, not sure why he was getting so worked up about it. Edward simply smiled and shrugged, going back to his glue gun. John watched him for a little while before putting down his phone and going to sit with him. “Make yourself useful” Edward mumbled and John got on with sticking rhinestones.

It was a few days later when it got brought up again. They were doing an interview when the interviewer asked if they had girlfriends. Edward answered, saying the usual “we don’t have time” and John smirked and bit his tongue against saying ‘but we’ll have some boyfriends please’. “So no love life at the moment?” She asked and John knew where this was leading “come one guys, I’m sure everyone is curious to know how far you’ve gone with a girl?” She smiled and John narrowed his eyes at her. “We’re good boys” Edward laughed “ but maybe if Britney’s interested?”

She laughed at Edward’s joke but John was annoyed. He didn’t know why it didn’t bother Edward and he tried not to let it bother him but it did. He was the only eighteen year old that he knew of who was still a virgin. Apart from Edward but that didn’t count. John had never even kissed another person, not properly and he was going to be nineteen in a month.

John knew he wasn’t interested in girls and he knew Edward wasn’t either. They had never actually spoken about it but they just knew. Edward would give John that look when a hot man was on TV or when they watched Justin Timberlake or Justin Bieber on YouTube. John knew that look as the 'look at this sexy man’ look and he was glad they had an unspoken understanding.

“I didn’t like her” John snapped in the car on the way back. “We don’t go around asking people if they’ve had sex so why do they always ask us?” Liam looked at them and laughed and John wanted to shout at him that it wasn’t funny. Edward was also smiling in amusement so John turned away from them and looked out of the window. He promised himself that he was going to have sex before their birthday.

Two days before his and Edward’s birthday they got invited to a launch party for some album John didn’t know the name of. It was late and Edward had already gone up to their hotel room and John had plans to follow and head to bed until he got talking to a pretty stranger at the bar.  He had asked John his name and John had introduced himself, relieved that the stranger didn’t know who he was. “My name’s Chris, do you want a drink?” He smiled and John nodded as he said “whatever you’re having”. A glass of vodka and coke was handed to him and he took a sip. It burned and he didn’t like it but he didn’t want to look stupid in front of Chris so took another sip.

John watched him take a drink from his own glass, his eyes scanning over John’s body. “You here with anyone?” Chris asked, his blue eyes glistening in the lights. John shook his head and took a tiny step forward, their bodies brushing up against each other’s. “You have a room?” Chris smiled and that made John think about Edward alone in their room and a pang of guilt shot through him. He hoped Edward wasn’t waiting for him, hoped he wouldn’t worry. “No” John answered letting Chris take hold of his hand. “You wanna come up to mine?” John almost backed out, nerves getting the better of him but Chris pressed his lips against John’s quickly and he was soon following him into the unknown.

They got to his room, two floors below where John and Edward’s room was and Chris was kissing him hungrily. John felt nervous and wished he had finished his vodka drink, just to relax him. Chris was pulling on John’s shirt and John let him strip it off, watching him do the same with his own. He was toned and good looking, fair skin and dirty blonde hair. John thought about Edward again and wondered if he would be mad at him for doing this. Chris kissed John’s chest, down to his stomach and John’s brain suddenly stopped working.

They tumbled on top of the made up bed and Chris was straddling John’s hips and kissing him on the lips. It was too wet and sloppy but John didn’t say anything as he let Chris kiss him. Chris moved off his hips and undone his jeans before pulling them from John’s legs so quickly, John couldn’t keep up. He palmed him through his underwear and John whined, letting his head full back on the pillow. “You’re a bottom yeah?” Chris asked, bringing John back to earth.

“What?” John frowned, his voice breathless. “Like, you want to me fuck you?” Chris expanded and John blushed, avoiding his stare. “I’ve never-” John hesitated, suddenly too embarrassed. “I’m a-”

John looked at him and smiled “yeah I’m a bottom.” He settles for saying instead. Chris leaned down and kissed John’s lips again, pulling off his pants with his other hand. John tried to relax into the kiss but all he could think about was Edward. He should’ve called him just to let him know that he was safe and he’ll be late.

John’s mind got muddled up and he was suddenly thinking about Edward kissing him. Chris’ hand was suddenly on him, stroking him slowly and John imagined it to be Edward’s touch, saw Edward in his mind’s eye touching him, long slender fingers wrapping around him and making him whimper. He shook the thought from his mind and disconnected their lips saying “can we hurry up?” As soon as he said it, he realised how stupid it sounded but Chris was grinning again. “Eager” he smiled and stood up to take off his own trousers.

John looked away, it was too awkward to look. The only other person he had ever seen naked was Edward and it felt strange to see someone else undressed. John mentally compared Chris’ body to Edward’s. He wasn’t as slender as Edward and less defined. Edward had sharp angles that shaped his body, whereas Chris didn’t. John frowned at the thought and started to worry that he was thinking about Edward too much. He knew it wasn’t the normal thing to do, thinking about your brother in the moments before sex but he almost wished Edward was with him because he always knew just what to do and say when John was too shy or embarrassed. Edward made him feel better and safe and John suddenly felt too alone, like he was missing his other half.

Chris was back on the bed and pulling at John. He didn’t really know what was going on until he was being maneuvered on to his knees. John naturally assumed he would be on his back with Chris on top, that’s how he had always imagined it. He didn’t like being on his hands and knees because it felt degrading. Chris asked if John was okay and John told him that he was. He carried on and John couldn’t help but think that Edward would have known. He would’ve picked up on John’s discomfort and stopped, changed positions without John needing to vocalise anything. John closed his eyes as Chris touched him. Maybe it’s just what happens, John thought, maybe this is how everyone does it.

John thought about Edward again. He wondered who Edward would end up sleeping with and how they would do it. John hoped Edward would wait until he falls in love so it would sweet and perfect. Chris slipped a finger inside of John, startling him and pulling him out of this thoughts. He groaned at the feeling because it felt good and John wanted more. Another finger was added and it burned but it was okay. Chris didn’t speak so neither did John and after a while of nothing but grunts and moans, Chris deemed John ready.

It hurt and John was about to stop it when it suddenly got better. His muscles seemed to fully relax and it wasn’t so sore so John held onto the headboard and closed his eyes. Chris was making noise and John didn’t like it because while he could hear Chris, he couldn’t pretend it was someone else. He sounded gruff and hoarse, unlike Edward. He would sound graceful and delicate.

John wanted Chris to be Edward. He finally admitted it to himself as Chris thrust into him and all John could think about was his twin doing it to him. He felt guilty and sad. John thought about Edward laying in bed, maybe he was asleep, maybe he was waiting up for John and John felt like shit about the whole thing.

Chris started stroking John but it was all wrong so John batted his hand away and done it himself. He imagined Edward, picturing his flushed face and biting his lip against  moaning Edward’s name. He came not too long after, the moment of bliss passing way too soon, leaving nothing but regret and confusion. Chris finished and pulled out a bit too roughly for John’s liking and threw himself onto the bed next to John. John didn’t know what to do, he didn’t know how to act in this situation so he sat around, getting off his hands and knees and pulled on his pants. He felt too exposed and quickly dressed, taking one last look at Chris before heading for the door. “See you around?” Chris asked from the bed and John shook his head before slamming the door shut behind him.

The hallway was cool and quiet and John closed his eyes while he took a few deep breaths. His body ached and he just wanted to get back to Edward, tell him all about it, tell him that he loves him and how he wished Chris was him. He headed to the hotel lift and pressed the button for the top floor where his and Edward’s room was.

John opened the door quietly and tried to sneak in, trying not to disturb Edward. “There you are” the lamp turned on and Edward was looking at him from his bed. He looked worried which added to John’s guilt. “Where were you?” John looked at Edward’s face and quickly decided not to tell him. He couldn’t risk losing him, telling Edward how he felt could jeopardise everything. He couldn’t face telling him about Chris either. Edward would be disappointed in him and John couldn’t bear it. “Party” John smiled, pulling off his clothes for the second time that night. “You okay?” Edward asked, a slight frown on his brow. John pulled on his sleep shorts and turned to Edward.

“Can I-” he left the question hanging but Edward got it and pulled back his quilt to let him into his bed without John having to ask. John smiled and silently thanked him for just understanding him. He slipped into bed and sat up next to Edward, pulling him into a hug and breathing him in, finally feeling at ease. “What’s happened?” Edward whispered as he held him, his hand smoothing over John’s bare back. He knew something was wrong and John cringed at thought. He didn’t want Edward to worry. “Nothing, just missed you” he said into Edward’s neck. John made no move to pull away so Edward settled back into his pillows, pulling John down with him. “You’re so weird” Edward spoke lightly before adding “you smell different.” John tensed up but Edward obviously didn’t think anything of it as he mumbled a sleepy “Goodnight”. Edward didn’t let go of him as he fell asleep and John was thankful for the comfort, even if Edward didn’t know he was giving it to him. “Night” John whispered, closing his eyes and listening to Edward’s heavy breathing.

In the next few days John felt rubbish. He was worried just in case he bumped into Chris but the worse thing about it all was keeping a secret from Edward. He felt awkward with the secret hanging over them, like some kind of dark cloud that he was sure Edward noticed. Edward didn’t mention it though, so maybe he was imagining it John reasoned to himself.

John found himself watching Edward more often and fully appreciating him. He had always loved Edward, loved him more than anyone or anything but this was different. He noticed the small things, like the way Edward’s body moved, the way his eyes smiled and lit up when he laughed. John found himself checking him out, letting his eyes run over his body and Edward would sometimes notice and smile at him before going back to whatever he was doing. Maybe he was just too polite to mention it or maybe he didn’t care. John hoped it was the latter. This just added to John’s guilt because every time he looked at Edward it reminded him of what he’d done and his feelings for him. Edward would sometimes ask if John was okay and John would smile and make a lame joke that Edward saw through but didn’t comment on.

Liam pulled John aside after yet another interviewer asked them about their sex lives. John had got a little too defensive and touchy about the whole situation. Edward had given him a look and John shut up and stayed quiet for the rest of the recording.

“What’s up with you?” Liam hissed, dragging John into an empty meeting room. Edward was chatting to the fans outside the hotel, too busy to notice their absence. John looked at the floor and opened his mouth to speak but all that came out was a sob as he burst into tears. Liam’s hands were on him instantly, patting his back and pulling him into a hug. “Oh my god, what’s happened?” Liam whispered, petting John’s hair. John stood up straight and mumbled something about Edward that didn’t make sense, even to himself.

Liam kept on rubbing John’s back, looking confused and worried. John took a few breaths and tried to calm down. “I had sex with some random guy named Chris” John started, the words tumbling out “and I hated it, I really hated it because it wasn’t Edward and I wanted it to be him Liam”. John finished, surprising himself at his confession. Liam frowned a little, his hand pausing, resting on John’s back for a second before moving, rubbing circles again. “John-” Liam said slowly “you had sex?” John nodded, his tears slowing down a little as he gathered himself. “With a stranger?”

John nodded again and Liam huffed. “Jesus John” Liam snapped “please tell me you used protection?”

“Yeah” John mumbled, his cheeks burning red. Liam nodded and sighed in relief “tell me again, calmer this time” Liam said “about what you said about Edward?”  John shifted on his feet, a few tears dropping as he met Liam’s concerned face. “It wasn’t right” John started “because it wasn’t Edward. I wanted it to be Edward, not someone I’d just met.” Liam stepped forward, leaning forward toward John. “You didn’t want it to be Edward-” he started but John shook his head and said “he was I could think about.”

“Yeah but that’s because he’s your safety blanket, not because you wanted to-” Liam broke off and rubbed a hand over his face. “You were in an unfamiliar situation with an unfamiliar person, you didn’t feel comfortable and Edward’s always been there to comfort you” Liam said “and because he wasn’t there, you thought about him to make you feel safe John, that’s all.” John nodded, even though he didn’t agree. “Have you told him?”

“No, I feel guilty. Like I’ve cheated on him or something.” John mumbled, feeling stupid. “You don’t have to feel guilty John. Just because you’re moving on, branching out without Edward. That’s not a bad thing.” John nodded again, simply to shut Liam up and end the conversation.

“There you are!” John jumped, turning on his heel to see Edward walking towards him and Liam. “John?” Edward rushed over, his hand outstretched. “What’s wrong?” Edward put hand on John’s shoulder and looked at him closely. John could guess what he looked like as he wasn’t the prettiest cryer. His face always went red and blotchy and his eyes puffed up. There was no hiding his upset, especially from Edward. “John?” Edward snapped when neither him nor Liam answered. “Come on” Liam said “let’s go upstairs.”

The short trip to their room was silent. Edward kept glancing at John, his face full of worry and John knew he had to tell him everything. “Get some sleep” Liam told them as he handed them their key card “see you both in the morning.” Edward unlocked the door as Liam walked to his own room and John followed Edward inside.

“What’s happened John? Please tell me what’s wrong?” Edward spoke as soon as the door was shut behind him. John flopped down on one of beds closely followed by Edward who sat next to him. “You know at the party I was gone for ages?” John said, sitting up and facing Edward. He gave a nod so John carried on, his voice shaky. “I was with someone. We had sex” Edward’s eyebrows raised slightly in surprise but that was all. “I hated it Ed” John mumbled before Edward could say anything, feeling himself tear up again.

“You were all I could think about and I closed my eyes and thought about you, imagined it to be you” the words came spilling out before John could stop them. “Edward, all I wanted was you and I know it’s wrong and I never meant for this-” John’s words were suddenly stifled by Edward’s lips on his, taking John by surprise. Edward didn’t deepen the kiss, just pressed his lips against John’s, warm and comforting.

“It doesn’t count” Edward mumbled as he pulled away from a stunned John. “It’s not your first time that matters John, it’s your first time with someone you love. that’s all that really matters”. Edward lifted John’s chin with his index finger, making him look at him. John smiled at him, his heart heavy in his chest. “I love you” John told him, finally speaking the words. Edward didn’t run away screaming which made John relax a bit. He knew what Liam said was wrong. He loved Edward, more than anything. “I’m so in love with you” Edward whispered in return and John leaned forward again, kissing Edward with passion this time, parting his lips and tasting him.

Everything felt so right, so natural, so unlike the last time. John knew he didn’t have to worry about anything as long as he was with Edward. He thought about what Edward had said about the real first time being with someone you love and as Edward’s fingers fumbled with undoing John’s jeans, John was completely sure that he was ready for his real first time.

[area50dununiverse]

You asked to prompt you smut and I am actually embarrassed to ask for this but the first thing that came in to my head when I read your liam fic was threesome with Liam? J & E maybe asking him to be their first time or teach them how maybe he's bisexual in the fic or something I dunno? I'm sorry if this is way too dirty lol do not feel pressured to write it at all if you're not comfortable with it but you asked for smut and that was the first thing that came to mind but like that's sooo dirty!!!

PLEASE do not be embarrassed to ask for smut!!! I literally LOVE writing smut and will always fill smutty prompts!! This may have come out a little more smutty than you may have expected though… I can’t help myself. I love Jed smut and i’m so glad you asked!! Read below as always and I hope you like it!

It was all Edward’s idea. John didn’t quite know how Edward managed to talk him into being the one to approach Liam to explain this great idea of his but he did. Edward was no help, silently standing behind him and Liam was in front of them both, looking at John like he had just grown another head right in front of his eyes.

John didn’t know how to bring it up or ask Liam in a natural way, so he just kind of blurted it out. He regretted it, he should’ve given Liam some warning but John was nervous and awkward so he literally walked up to Liam and shouted the question, his words almost a slur as he spoke them too quickly.

“What?” Liam finally asked and John could feel how red his cheeks were. He took a deep breath and silently cursed Edward. “Can you help us?” John repeated and Liam nodded. “Yeah I got that bit. It’s the rest of it I’m struggling with.” Liam said and John really didn’t want to say it again. “Can you help us have sex Liam?” John mumbled, watching Liam’s eyes widen. “Oh so you did say that. Thought I’d misheard you”

“We can’t do it okay?” Edward jumped in “it won’t work and neither of us know what to do.” John looked at Edward as he spoke and wondered if they should have got dressed to do this. That way, they wouldn’t be standing there wearing nothing but their shorts and it would have taken a little bit of awkwardness away. “I’m not going to pretend I’m surprised about you two but me?” Liam looked between the two of them “I can’t help you with this.”

“You can if you-” John cut himself short, leaving the rest of the sentence to Liam’s imagination. Liam seemed to get it and his eyes ran over John’s body once. John reached out, trailing his fingertips over Liam’s knee, hardly even touching him. Edward rested his chin on John’s shoulder and ran his hand down the length of John’s arm until he was also touching Liam’s leg. Liam tensed, John felt his muscles twitch. “Please Liam?” John pouted and Liam was struggling.

“What have you actually done?” Liam asked, his voice strained “just so I know what you’re cool with.” he quickly added making John smirk. He had an idea that Liam wasn’t really asking for their benefit. “Everything but sex” John answered “like oral, dry sex-”

“John spanked me once” Edward interjected and John thought Liam was going to explode. Liam was getting hard and John could feel that Edward was too from where he was pressed up against his back. “Really?” Liam mumbled “fuck”

John nodded and took a step back from him, taking Edward’s hand and leading him back to bed. Just as John thought, had hoped, Liam appeared in the doorway behind them, pulling off his shirt. John looked at his body, comparing it with Edward’s and deciding that there was no competition. Edward was so perfectly stunning in every way, no one could even come close. Edward was studying Liam too from where he sat on the edge of the bed, his cheeks pink and his boxers tented.

John joined Edward, sitting beside him as Liam pulled of his jeans. They were all even now, wearing nothing but shorts and John was getting impatient. He pressed the heel of his palm against his crotch, letting out a long shuddery breath at the pressure. Liam’s eyes were burning into him and it gave John a surge of confidence as he turned to Edward and gently pushed him down onto the bed.

He straddled his waist and kissed him, Edward kissing him back with hunger, arching his back up to press his body against John’s. John whimpered against Edward’s lips, almost forgetting Liam was even there. Edward was so easy to get lost in and John would often zone out of his surroundings while Edward was talking, getting lost in the way his face moved or the way he spoke. When John was in bed with him, it was worse. Edward had to constantly remind John to be quiet just in case someone heard, but John couldn’t care about anyone else but Edward in those moments. All he could think about was Edward.

Liam stepped closer and Edward reached his hand out, disconnecting from John’s kiss to pull Liam onto the bed beside them. John moved his lips down Edward’s neck and across his shoulders, leaving little kisses all over his skin while Edward pulled Liam down towards him and kissed his lips. John sat up on Edward’s lap and watched Liam kiss him. He was rougher than John was most of the time. John didn’t really get rough unless Edward asked for it, but John could see that Liam was naturally rough. Edward wasn’t complaining, his hands coming around the back of Liam’s neck to deepen the kiss, their lips and tongues working fast.

Edward pushed his hips up against John’s looking for friction. Liam’s hand was on his chest now, grazing over his nipples and feeling his way down Edward’s abs where he met John’s thigh. Liam stroked the skin on the inside of his thigh, dangerously close to John’s dick and John held his breath, enjoying the feel of Liam’s touch. He watched as Liam and Edward parted and noticed how full and pink Edward’s lips were.

John wanted to kiss him again but didn’t get the chance as Liam was pulling him into a kiss. Edward sat up on his elbows and watched and John felt dizzy with lust. John tried to keep up with the kiss but mostly just let Liam kiss him as his hips twitched against Edward’s. John opened his eyes and looked at Edward, his eyes were transfixed on him and Liam so he kissed Liam with force, using more tongue and making little sounds, putting on a show for Edward. Liam hummed into the kiss just before pulling away and John missed the contact. John looked at Edward and leant down to connect their lips again. It was nice, tasting Edward again. There was something comforting in it and John couldn’t help but lick a broad stripe from Edward’s collar bones up his neck to the tip of his chin. Edward moaned, his head thrown back and John was moving down his body, kissing down his chest and down the trail of hair under his belly button.

Liam’s watchful glare spurred John on, sending thrills through his body as he pulled down Edward’s pants, kissing his thighs and hip bones. Edward’s hand flew out and gripped Liam’s wrist as John took him into his mouth, his eyes looking up at Edward’s face. Edward let out a long cry as John sunk down on him and John saw Liam guide Edward’s hand down to his crotch, rubbing himself against it with a low moan. Edward took a bit of control back as he helped Liam pull down his pants and took him into his hand. Liam grunted as Edward touched him and John ground his hips down onto Edward’s knee, trying to relieve some pressure that was building up in his own groin.

John watched Edward’s hand work Liam. Liam was definitely bigger than the both of them, thicker in girth and it excited and scared John at the same time. Liam met John’s stare and John held it as he pulled off  Edward, mouth open, tongue out, licking up his full length and leaving a string of saliva connecting his lips to Edward’s dick. Liam licked his own lips as John shifted himself over. Edward’s hand stilled, holding the base of Liam’s cock as John took the tip into his mouth. He knew he couldn’t fit all of Liam into his mouth and was great full for Edward’s hand, twisting his fist around the bit John couldn’t get his lips around.

Liam was almost singing, his moans and cries reaching a range of octaves. Edward turned on his side, watching John suck Liam, his lips meeting Edward’s hand as he sunk down. Edward let out a small sound and Liam reached over John to touch him. John pulled off of Liam, desperate to be touched. Liam didn’t hesitate and John flopped down on Liam’s other side while he jacked them both off. John could hear himself making strangled sounds, bucking up into Liam’s hand, so needy and desperate.

It was different to when Edward touched him. Edward knew his way around John’s body, knew where he liked to be touched and how he liked it. Liam was new to it, his touch not perfect but still amazing. John looked at Liam and thought that he should maybe touch him but his brain was melting and he couldn’t concentrate on anything other than the pleasure.

“I’m ready!” Edward cried and it took a few seconds for John to work out what he meant but with a rush of excitement, he realised that Liam was there to show them how to fuck. He was going to fuck Edward and the thought alone made him moan, pushing up into Liam’s hand. Liam let go of him and John vaguely heard him telling Edward to get on his knees. John watched Edward follow Liam’s instruction, getting to his knees with his legs spread. Liam mumbled “fuck” as he took in the sight and John felt proud that Edward was his.

“John” Liam spoke, snapping John out of his trance. John positioned himself behind Edward, stroking his palm down his arse and licking his lips. “You need to use your fingers-” Liam pulled the lube out of nowhere and John guessed Edward had given it to him. He held John’s hand out and slicked up his fingers before guiding it towards Edward’s arse. “Use one finger first” Liam said and John hesitantly pressed a finger to Edward’s hole, making him grunt and twitch. John slid it in with no problem and Liam showed him how to work Edward, how to crook his finger and add another.

Edward was a whimpering mess by the time John had three fingers inside of him. John didn’t think he could last much longer and Liam was looking just as flushed as he was. Liam squirted a good amount of lube in his hand and wrapped it around John, slicking him up. John bit his lip and moaned at the touch but Liam’s touch was suddenly gone and he was saying “ready Edward?” John whined again, knowing what he was about to do. “Yes!” Edward cried “yes, yes, do it John!” John pressed a kiss to the base of Edward’s spine, mumbling that he was perfect and how much John loved him. John loved seeing Edward like this, completely undone and on the edge.

John knelt and lined himself up, gently applying pressure. Nothing was happening and John panicked because he didn’t think he could fit. He didn’t want to hurt Edward and pulled away from him so Liam took hold of the base of John’s dick and pushed him into Edward harder. John and Edward both cried out as John entered him. It was tight and hot and John had never felt anything like it before. Liam made a sound as he pushed John from behind, making him bottom out. Edward was groaning and John pulled himself together enough to ask if he was okay, but Edward was pushing back onto John and yelling for him to move so John did. Liam’s hands were on his hips, pushing and pulling. John let him guide him, leaning his body back against Liam’s chest. Liam kissed John’s lips and neck, biting every so often as Liam controled John’s thrusts.

Edward was making the sweetest sounds John had ever heard him make and John knew he wasn’t going to last. John took the lead, taking control of his hips, thrusting into Edward harder and faster. He watched as Edward held onto the bed frame, his body jerking with each of John’s trusts. Liam reached around John and started touching Edward, wrapping his hand around his dick. Edward mewled and cried and John could feel himself coming, burying himself deep inside Edward, his hips twitching as he rode out his orgasam. John could hear Edward coming a second after him. He recognised Edward’s sounds, not needing to even look to know what was happening. John opened his eyes to watch Edward, but he couldn’t see much in the position they were in. He pressed little kisses along Edward’s back until he finished and pulled out, hissing at the sensitivity.

Edward collapsed onto the bed, his breath ragged, his body spent and John could feel it too, but Liam was still pressed up against him, his hips twitching against John. John moved around to face him, taking hold of Liam’s dick. Edward was moving too, following John’s lead and they both knelt in front of him. John leaned down to take Liam into his mouth twirling his tonuge around the head before sinking down. Edward watched him for a moment before joining him, their lips and tongues working together around Liam’s dick. It was messy and wet and every now and then their lips would meet in a messy kiss and Liam was shouting, both John and Edward’s names mingled with moans and cries. Liam came suddenly, getting come on both their faces and John thought that was the hottest thing to ever happen.

He leaned forward and licked through the come on Edward’s face, tasting Liam. John didn’t love the taste of come but he didn’t think it was awful. Edward done the same to him, licking Liam’s come from John’s neck before kissing his sticky lips. Liam watched them through hooded eyes and groaned. John pulled Edward closer, wrapping his arms around him in a tight embrace. Edward was sticky from when he came on himself and from Liam’s come but John didn’t care as he pressed kisses to his face and neck whispering that he loved him.

They both flopped down and John pulled the covers up and over the three of them. “Thanks Liam” he mumbled as he yawned. Liam laughed and said “no, thank you guys” and closed his eyes. Edward shifted himself so he was spooning John and John draped an arm around Liam. They all laid in silence, listening to the heavy breaths filling the room. John was still buzzing from his afterglow, sticky and messy but he was too sleepy to care. He smiled to himself thinking about how much fun he and Edward were going to have now they’ve had sex and cracked open an eye to look at Liam. John smirked to himself, listening to Edward sleep behind him and watching Liam drift into sleep in front of him. Yeah, he and Edward were going to have a lot of fun together. John and Edward… and maybe Liam once in awhile.

[area50dununiverse]

I have an idea for a fanfiction if that's okay? I'm hoping you might write it because I would never do it justice and your writing is perfect on so many levels! My idea is: John + Edward being younger (in school) and super angsty but they do things like hold hands, kiss, cuddle etc but it's completely innocent and they're accused of being in a relationship and they're parents are called etc because teachers/students find it "disturbing" and they're made to feel their relationship is dirty/wrong?

Thank you so much! I honestly live of off air and sweet comments, so thank you :) xx I hope you like it, re-reading it, it isn’t that angsty and i’m not 100% sure on it.. but I hope you like it anyway! Read below, as always :)

Edward giggled as John grabbed him, wrapping his arms around his brother’s waist and hugging him tight, lifting Edward’s feet off the floor. A few of the other mothers in the nursery playground all made a cooing sound, telling Susanna how sweet her twins were. Edward smacked a kiss to John’s lips before they took of running towards the play area. “Stay where I can see you!” Their mum called after them, walking behind with the other mothers.

•

John noticed a sudden change when they were in junior school. They were ten and he could see the funny looks they got when he linked his arm with Edward’s as they walked, or when they hugged whenever they greeted each other. It was parent’s evening and John and Edward were slumped in their seats next to their parents. Mrs Jones had just finished telling them about Edward’s latest maths test and how he could have ‘done better’. Edward was giving her the dirtiest look he could conjure up and John had to stifle a laugh because Edward’s face could perfectly convey what he was thinking. “And another issue..” Mrs Jones said, running her eyes over the boys. “They aren’t making friends or socialising with any other students.” John looked at Edward in a silent question. “They’re lovely boys but I feel they are segregating themselves.” She continued, giving John a kind of sad smile. Their mother cleared her throat, giving them a smile before saying “they’ve always been close. There isn’t an issue if they’re happy.” John smiled at her and linked his arm around Edward’s just to make a point. She will never break them apart.

“Boys, you need to talk to people. Make a friend.” Their dad told them as he drove them home that night. John frowned and opened his mouth to speak but Edward was first in. “We have a friend.”

“I mean other friends. Not each other.” He snapped back, making John frown at the back of head. “Why?” John whined, folding his arms. “It might be nice.” Their mother jumped in, her voice soft. “But I don’t like anyone else.” Edward flicked John’s ear as he spoke so John held onto his hand to keep him from another attack. Susanna turned in her seat to look at them but said nothing more.

•

Four years later, age 14 and they still hadn’t made any other friends. They were put into clubs and made to sit with other kids in lessons and John hated every second of it, because why couldn’t he just stay with Edward? He didn’t want to be friends with anyone else. He knew he was safe with Edward, that he would never hurt him. It was so easy being friends with Edward, John could be himself, there was no pressures or fallouts, they loved each other no matter what.  No one else understood them, choosing to pick on them or to ignore them completely. John could handle being ignored, he actually preferred it that way. Other kids would call them names and make fun of them. John never understood why. He didn’t think there was anything different about them that made them stick out so much. Whenever he asked his parents or a teacher, he was always told the same thing. That they closed themselves off, separated themselves from the others, therefore making a target for themselves. John always hated that the most.

When Edward didn’t turn up for lunch, John instantly knew there was something wrong. John went looking for him, heading to Edward’s classroom, feeling uneasy. Maybe what people said about the ‘twin thing’ was right because John could sense trouble, somehow knowing Edward needed him. He could hear the laughing from two doors away and hurried to the door, swinging it open to find Edward on the floor, three boys looming over him, laughing at him. John shouted for the to get out and grabbed the one nearest boy to him, pushing him out the classroom door. He wanted to go for the bigger one, punch his stupid face but he was more concerned in seeing to Edward. The group took the chance to run as John got to Edward, pulling him to his feet and brushing him down. John could hear the boys laughing as they ran down the hall, anger boiling inside of him.

John pulled Edward closer, inspecting his face. Edward was tearful and held onto the tops of John’s arms, keeping him close. “Are you okay?” John asked, his voice hushed. Edward nodded and looked over his shoulder. “They’re gone.” John reassured, fixing Edward’s hair. “I’m not hurt” Edward said, his voice small and John leaned in and kissed his flushed cheek because he needed to do something to make him better. “Thank you for saving me” Edward mumbled as John pressed a kiss to his other cheek, still holding him close. “Anytime.” John smiled, pulling him into a long hug. Edward clung onto him and buried his face in John’s coat, his body shaking.

•

Two weeks later, their parents were called to the school office. John and Edward were told to wait outside by Mrs White, the head teacher.  "What have you done?“ Edward whispered, his ear pressed against the door. “Nothing!” John snapped. “Why do you just assume it’s me?”

“She’s saying…” Edward paused, straining his ears. “Unusual behavior..” Edward whispered, going silent again to listen for more. “Who have you kissed?” Edward gasped , whipping his head around to look at John who was completely confused by this point. “No one!” He wailed, his eyes wide. Edward looked at him and smirked “that’s what she said, you kissed someone?”

The door handle rattled and Edward ran from the door before John could answer, jumping on to the nearest seat which was the one John was already sitting in. “Edward-” Susanna snapped, as she came out and saw them “can’t you sit in your own seat?” Edward shifted on John’s lap, their parents and the head teacher all looking at them. John wanted to defend Edward, explain that he simply jumped into the nearest chair, but then Edward would be in trouble for listening. John stayed quiet, one arm around Edward’s back to keep him from falling off his lap.

The car journey home was quiet. Neither of them knew what they had done to cause an atmosphere. John racked his brain, remembering what Edward said about him kissing someone, but he knew he hadn’t so they couldn’t be mad at him for that. Edward was staring out the window so John poked him to get his attention. Edward laughed and flicked John’s nose, making John laugh too, his eyes watering from the sting. Before they knew it, they were in fits of giggles, ignoring the disapproving looks from their parents.

•

“We have a surprise for you!” Their mother smiled at John and Edward walked through the door. Edward had his arm linked with John’s so their mum lightly batted his arm, making him let go. “Ready?” She smiled, starting for the stairs. John was first to follow, followed by Edward and their dad. “As you’re both almost fifteen, we thought it would be nice if..” They got to the top of the stairs and Susanna paused what she was saying for dramatic effect.

“…You had your own rooms!” She finished, throwing open their bedroom door to reveal one bed in the middle of the floor, against the far wall. John’s jaw dropped open. “This can be your room Edward-” she said opening the door to the next room along, that was once their dad’s office. “What?” Edward breathed from beside John, his face as shocked as John’s. “It’s good, you’ll have your own space-”

“I don’t want my own space!” John argued, looking between his parents. “I like sharing a room.” Edward added, his hand touching John’s. John instinctively held it as their dad tried to list all the reasons why having your own room was a good thing. “You can invite your friends around?” Their mum suggested hopefully. John didn’t want to stamp on her excitement but he couldn’t keep himself from saying “Edward’s my friend. I don’t need anyone else.”

“Just give it a try, if you really don’t like it..” Susanna sighed and folded her arms, pausing for a second before saying “we will move it back.” Edward squeezed John’s hand and John agreed.

It took one night before they decided to move Edward’s bed back into their room. They waited until they were home alone and moved it back themselves, Edward standing back while he watched John do all the hard work. “Together forever!” Edward declared just as their dad walked in. He shook his head but didn’t comment on their arrangement, instead asking them what they wanted for dinner.

•

“John is gay!” someone called as John walked through the hall, heading for the doors. John looked over his shoulder but ignored it as he spotted Edward. “Who was that?” Edward asked as he started to walk in line with him, his arm hooking onto John’s. John shrugged his answer and pushed his way through the crowds, Edward falling behind, letting go of John’s arm. “Lost your boyfriend?” John heard the same shout, turning around to see Edward grabbing Dean Mayher’s shirt collar and pushing him against the wall. John stepped forward, taking hold of Edward’s arm just in time for Dean to push him backwards. Edward stumbled and fell, landing on the floor. “Get off me, Gayboy!” Dean spat and John quickly grabbed Edward, helping him to his feet. “Kiss it better John!” Dean laughed, making the crowd around them laugh too.

John protectively stepped in front of Edward, his hand tightly gripped around Edward’s, holding him in place. “Leave him alone Dean” John said, his voice not coming out as strong as he wanted. Dean laughed harder and Edward pulled John’s arm signalling him to walk away. “Go home and fuck your brother!” He heard Dean call after them as Edward dragged him down the hall.

“What’s his problem?” John raged “are you okay?” John checked Edward over, making sure he wasn’t hurt. “I’m okay John” Edward assured, holding John’s hand as they walked. John looked over his shoulder to make sure Dean was out of sight before gripping Edward’s hand in return. It was comforting, warm and John didn’t feel so angry and hurt with Edward by his side. He looked between them at their hands and wondered if they should stop doing things like that, stop being so touchy. “Edward-” John started, biting his lip before he spoke again. Edward turned to look at him, face relaxed, a small smile on his lips. John smiled back and looked at their joined hands again. He didn’t feel wrong or strange and he could tell that Edward didn’t either. He couldn’t say anything and run the risk of hurting Edward’s feelings. “You’re the best. Don’t listen to them” he said instead. Edward beamed at him and returned the compliment. John didn’t think about it again. They carried on walking home, hand in hand and completely at ease.

•

The third time John and Edward found themselves sitting outside the head teacher’s office was because of a play fight. John didn’t quite understand why, it wasn’t like they were actually fighting but he blamed Edward anyway. Mrs Matthews had found them on the field and pulled them apart, her voice raised as she said something about ‘inappropriate behavior’ and marching them to the office. John had listened at the door and heard her describe it as ‘disturbing’ to the head teacher. He looked at Edward and frowned, Edward looking as confused as he was.

“We weren’t even fighting” Edward whispered as their mum walked through the office after being called in. “You boys had better come in too” Mrs White told them, holding the door open for them to pass. Their mum shot them a look and John saw Edward sink down in his seat. He knew they were in trouble.

“Sorry to call in Mrs Grimes” Mrs White started, her eyes focusing on their mum. “There was an incident today on the school playing field. One of our teachers found John and Edward in a..” Mrs White paused, her lips pursed “compromising position.” John looked at Edward, neither of them understanding what she meant by ‘compromising’ and by the look on his mother’s face, neither did she. “What are you saying?” She asked, her eyes flicking between John and Edward for moment. They were sitting next to each other on her left side, Edward was directly beside her and John was next to Edward. Mrs White sighed from across her desk, “This isn’t the first time we’ve spoken about their closeness and I’m afraid it’s getting worse.”

“What?” John snapped, unable to contain himself. “What’re you on about?” Mrs White gave him a stern look as John gawked back at her. “Mrs Grimes” she continued, ignoring John’s outburst. “This isn’t healthy and in front of the other students-”

“What were they doing?” Susanna interjected, her face stormy. John looked between the two women and back at Edward, who was fiddling with his hands, not even looking up at anyone or paying attention.John nudged him with his knee, trying to figure out why he wasn’t bothered about what was being said about them. Edward flicked his eyes up but went back to picking at his nail, board. John felt like he was being judged, like he should be ashamed, apologise for liking Edward and spending time with him.

“Well..” Mrs White looked uneasy suddenly “John was atop of Edward.. Straddling him.” John saw Edward’s head snap up at that, a incredulous look on his face. John’s own mouth dropped, his eyes wide as everything slotted together in his brain.

Susanna cleared her throat. “Boys?” She asked, her voice even and controlled. John could tell she was angry, he just hoped it was at the Mrs White and not them. Edward was first to speak, trying to explain. “We were just messing around” he said, his voice not one bit as controlled as their mother’s. “Edward stole my last sweet, so I pushed him over and we were just-” John jumped in, his  eyes wildly flicking from person to person before landing on Edward, he looked upset and John couldn’t comfort him, not in front in Mrs White. Not now.

“There have been many incidences, as you’re aware "Mrs White told their mother, her face stern. "Many of the other kids have been unsettled by their disturbing behavior.” John wanted the ground to open up and swallow him. The thought of everyone judging them and gossiping, calling them 'disturbing’ of all things made him want to grab Edward and run, never to come back. Edward was frozen, his mouth hanging open, eyes wide and he looked on the verge of tears.

“They’re twins. They’re close and people just don’t understand their relationship” Susanna stressed, looking like she was going to cry too. John looked at her and felt like he’d disappointed her. Upset his own mother unintentionally. “We’ve tried” she went on “after the kissing, we tried to separate their rooms so they had one each, but-”

“Kissing?” John spat, trying to get his head around what was being implied. “You didn’t talk to them about it?” Mrs White asked their mum before looking at John. “A few weeks ago you two were seen kissing in a classroom.” John whipped around to look at Edward to see if he had an idea of what was happening. He needed him to step in, to defend them because John couldn’t. Edward had always been better at speaking than John was, articulating his words so people listened. John wondered if they were too close, maybe everyone was right and there was something wrong with them.

“What kiss?” Edward spoke up for the first time, looking back at John for support. “In classroom 3B, at lunch” Mrs White added as an explanation. John still couldn’t figure it out, he hadn’t kissed Edward, or anyone else. He saw Edward’s face drop as it dawned on him. “That’s what you were talking about..” He mumbled, before turning to John and explaining “when they said you kissed someone? Remember?” Edward spoke directly to him, almost laughing now. “It was me!” He suddenly burst out, tears falling as laughter overtook him. Their mum gave him a warning look, as if to tell him to shut up. “Edward, this is hardly funny” she growled and John actually agreed with her, thinking Edward had actually lost his mind. So much for being the calm, articulate one, John thought.

“My cheek-” Edward giggled, “he kissed my cheek”. John suddenly remembered the incident and frowned. “Wait, so some kids beat Edward up and all you worry about is the fact I kissed him on the cheek?” John snapped, trying to stay calm and not get angry. He looked at Edward, who had sobered up, his laughter had stopped but he still looked incredibly entertained by the whole thing. “This is the stupidest thing ever.” Edward smiled, looking at Susanna and asking “do you really think there’s something wrong with us?” Susanna shook her head, looking at Mrs White. “They’ve explained their side of things, and it’s all innocent” she said, patting Edward’s knee “They’re best friends and they will always be there for each other.”

John watched as Mrs White shifted in her seat. She looked between John and Edward and frowned, obviously not convinced. “They will be put in separate classes from now on” she said, looking back at their mum. John tensed up, but Edward’s hand was on his arm as an indicator to keep quiet, so he didn’t argue. “I will advise you watch them very closely Mrs Grimes” Mrs White warned as they stood up to leave. Susanna shook her hand and gestured for John and Edward to leave. They all walked out and headed to the car in silence.

•

“I’m sorry about today” Susanna looked at them in the rear-view mirror as she drove them home. “You two pay no notice to what people think.” John smiled and continued looking out the window at passing houses. He wondered what Edward thought, whether it would change their relationship. Edward might feel self-conscious, he might not want to hug John anymore, or spend so much time with him. John felt his heart sink. “I’m sorry I tried to separate you two, I promise it won’t happen again” their mother smiled and John smiled back, feeling sad.

When they got home, John and Edward went straight to their room while their parents spoke about the meeting. As he climbed the stairs, he heard his mum start saying “you’ll never believe what that bitch at the school called me in for..” John laughed to himself as he got to their room, Edward behind him. John needed to talk to Edward about what was said about them and how he felt. He needed to know if things were going to be any different, if Edward still loved him like he did before the meeting. John couldn’t blame him if he wanted to distance himself from him. Maybe they did need other friends, normal friends like everyone else.John thought back to how fed up Edward looked in the office, how uncaring he was and John knew. He knew Edward had lost interest, was too ashamed to even look at John.

John turned to face him, his eyes searching Edward’s face, looking for clues, he opened his mouth to speak only to be silenced by Edward’s body hitting his, hard. John stumbled back, but Edward pulled him into a tight embrace, his hands shaking. John rested his chin on Edward’s shoulder with a smile. “Don’t listen to them” Edward whispered and John knew then, that nothing had changed between them. They were the same John and Edward and they weren’t going to change for anyone. “I thought you didn’t want to be as close anymore” John whispered, relief flowing through him. Edward pulled back to look at John, a frown on his face. “You couldn’t even look at me in there.” John said, feeling hurt again. Edward scoffed and smiled “because I didn’t care” he said, making John wince. “I didn’t care because i know no one can change us. I don’t care what anyone else thinks John.” John smiled as Edward spoke and pulled him back into the hug. “Best friends forever?” Edward spoke into John’s shoulder where his face was buried. John smiled and gave him a squeeze. “Best friends forever.”

[area50dununiverse]

I am in love with your two newest fanfictions! Literally amazing! Ps, prompt (no pressure to do this though!) but: the first time Edward tops? They plan it really carefully but John starts panicking really badly because it hurts and they have to stop and John gets really upset because he thinks it's not possible Edward likes it and he's only doing it to please him? But then fluffy ending maybe they do it in the bath or something so it happens naturally not planned and John relaxes and enjoys it?

Thank you so much!! Hope you like this :) (Am I only one that gets nervous about posting fics??) Enjoy! keep reading..

John’s eyes met Edward’s as soon as their mother had said the words. “Will you be okay?” She asked, looking guilty and John thought he was maybe too quick to snap “yes”. Edward smiled because he knew exactly what John was thinking. John could hardly contain his excitement. A whole weekend alone. Kevin was staying at the university campus and their parents  had been invited to a wedding in England. John smiled casually and gave a nod. “We’ll keep ourselves entertained.”

•

“Edward?” John whispered from across the room. Edward stirred and turned in his bed with a hushed “yeah?” John hated it when they slept in separate beds. “I have an idea” John whispered into the darkness “this weekend. I want you to..” John trailed off, suddenly awkward. “What?” Edward hissed. “Fuck me” John quickly said, feeling himself heat up. There was a pause before John heard Edward move and saw his dark shape crossing the room. Edward slid into John’s bed. “You sure?”

“Yeah” John pressed his body close to Edward’s. “Okay” Edward agreed, tangling their legs together.

•

“How does it even fit?” John asked as they watched the porn that Edward had brought up on the laptop. “I don’t know!” Edward laughed, “just does.” John watched the screen, the video of two overly masculine men fucking playing out, volume on mute.

They had only had full sex three times, taking chances when their parents weren’t home. John had topped each time, it was quicker and easier that way because Edward had bottomed first time so was used to it and he enjoyed it that way. John hadn’t given it much thought, Edward was always eager and John was always too horny to think about it. He thought back to their first time, remembering how long it took to prepare Edward. “Let’s buy more lube” Edward said, pulling john from his thoughts. “Yeah, more lube” John agreed.

•

“Love you too” John said as he hugged his mum goodbye. “We’ll see you on Monday, be good!” She called as she got in the car. “You have no idea” John mumbled under his breath as they waved them off. Edward burst out laughing before dragging John into the house.

•

“Just remember everything I told you and you’ll be fine.” Edward said, his hand tracing light trails on John’s chest. John huffed out a breath and nodded, squeaking out a sound as Edward’s hand dropped lower down his stomach. Edward smiled down at him, obviously pleased with his reaction. John was aching for it. Edward had been touching him for ages, fingers running against skin, dipping under John’s pants for the briefest of seconds before his fingers were onto the next patch of skin.

“Ed-” John breathed, lifting his hips off the bed, silently begging. Edward bit his lip as he looked down at John from where he was laying beside him, propped up by his elbow. “What?” He asked innocently and John wanted to jump him, wipe the smile off his face and replacing it with the delightful sounds Edward made as John made him come undone. Edward pulled on John’s briefs, tugging them down and off his legs before kissing a trail from his bellybutton down to his hip and down his thigh.

John hummed, eyes closed, his hips twitching at the contact. Edward’s lips were suddenly gone and John could hear the draw sliding open and closed again. He held his breath in anticipation, not daring to open his eyes but suddenly Edward’s lips were back on his skin, kissing across his chest and down his stomach. John relaxed into Edward’s touches, his eyes heavy, breath shallow. Something cold and wet touched his thigh and John opened his eyes to see Edward adding lube to his fingers, spilling some on his skin. “Sorry” Edward mumbled as he dipped his hand, feeling down the crease of John’s arse, making John gasp. “Okay-” Edward said “I’ll put one in, it won’t hurt, just feels weird.” John was tense, he could feel it so he tried to relax himself as Edward’s finger circled his entrance. There was a little pressure before Edward’s finger was slowly pushed inside him. John bit his lip, his fingers gripping the pillow so hard, he thought he might tear it in two. “John, relax” Edward was saying, moving his finger, bending it slightly and turning it. John let out a shaky breath and closed his eyes “okay” He said, adjusting to the feel. “It’s okay” John smiled, feeling relieved.

“I’m gonna do another” Edward told him, pulling his finger almost all the way out. Edward repositioned himself, leaning over John and kissing his stomach as he slowly pushed in again, two fingers this time. John whined, his voice high and strained but just as it almost became too much, Edward’s mouth was on his dick and John’s brain short-circuited. Edward swirled his tongue around the head as he crooked his fingers, before opening them up. John didn’t know what to focus on, so concentrated on what Edward’s mouth was doing. He felt the burn, the unnatural feeling of something being inside of him but Edward’s mouth sunk down and John couldn’t think about anything else. “Ed-” John whispered feeling the tightness “I’m gonna-”

Edward pulled off at John’s warning as smiled at him, saying “three” and moving his fingers inside him. John’s breath hitched as he realised what Edward meant. Edward had slipped in another finger and John didn’t even know, too caught up in what Edward’s mouth was doing. John was sore. He squirmed against the bed, his eyes locked with Edward’s as he stretched him. Edward pulled his fingers out and John breathed a sigh of relief. He watched Edward kneel between his legs, shuffling closer to him and held his breath in anticipation.

John was excited. A nervous kind of excitement that made his skin tingle all over. “You good?” Edward asked, stroking John’s thigh. John nodded an answer, lifting his hips towards Edward, needing him to hurry up before he explodes. Edward leaned over and kissed John’s chest and it was nice. Soft and sweet and John could stay like that forever, but before John could lose himself in Edward’s kisses, he was pushing forward.

John gave a nod, when Edward paused, looking down at him in question and he felt a tight pressure as Edward pushed against him. John worried all of a sudden and was just about to stop him when he felt the pop of Edward entering him. John felt breathless, like he was suddenly winded and he didn’t understand what he was doing wrong. Why didn’t it feel like Edward described? “You okay?” Edward stopped moving, his face worried and John didn’t know what to do or how to speak so he pushed his hands against Edward’s chest, trying to get him away. Edward frowned and pulled back, a horrible cramping pain shooting through John’s pelvis as Edward pulled out.

“Fuck-” Edward breathed, hands on John’s face. “Are you okay John?” John looked at Edward and reached out, taking hold of his hand. “You don’t tell me it hurt that much!” John’s voice was stressed, shaky as he spoke. “You let me hurt you?” Edward frowned at John’s question, sitting himself down next to John, holding his hand. “You didn’t relax enough” Edward told him, his voice soft. John felt himself getting upset. He couldn’t believe that Edward had gone along with it, letting John hurt him. “Why didn’t you tell me? I would’ve stopped.” John sat up, moving closer to Edward. He wanted to wrap him up and kiss him. “No, I like it” Edward assured, resting his free hand on John’s thigh. “It doesn’t matter this didn’t work, don’t worry” Edward comforted “you can top from now on.”

“No!” John snapped “I’m not hurting you anymore.”

John tried to think back, wondering if he had pressured Edward into anything. Maybe he’d  made Edward think that he had to do it. John knew that Edward was a people pleaser, always trying to make other people happy, especially John and he kicked himself for not picking up on the fact that Edward was uncomfortable, in pain all because of him. Edward gently pushed John so he was laying down and laid down beside him, laying on his side and looking at him. “John, I like it” Edward insisted “I love it, it feels good and I feel close to you when we do it, like closer than ever.” John turned to face Edward, lacing their fingers together. He wasn’t convinced. “I love you.” John whispered, leaning in to kiss the tip of Edward’s nose. Edward laughed and shuffled closer to John whispering “I love you too” as he snuggled into him. John held Edward close, feeling guilty and stressed, his body aching.

•

John woke up hours later to the sound of running water and Edward moving around the room. “Wanna bath?” Edward asked as he noticed John waking. John hummed an answer, stretching his body and wincing as he felt the ache. Edward pulled him by the hand and dragged him out of bed before leading him to the bathroom. John padded after him, yawning. “What’s the time?” It was dark, the only light coming from the lamp that Edward must’ve turned on. “Just past midnight” Edward answered, John’s eyes trailing down his naked body. Edward didn’t put the bathroom light on, the lamp in their room was casting a dim glow around the small room. Edward leaned over and turned off the tap so John took the opportunity to lightly run his index finger down his spine causing Edward to shiver. “Get in” Edward said, his voice low, almost a whisper.

The water was hot as John slowly lowered himself down. Edward was standing next to the bath, waiting for John to get settled before joining him. They were lucky enough to have a joining bathroom to their bedroom and often bathed together, managing to fit themselves into the small bathtub perfectly. There had only been a couple of times that they had almost been caught sharing the bath and John was always grateful when they had the house to themselves, no need to worry or rush.

Edward climbed in, slotting his body between John’s legs, resting his chest against John’s. John wrapped his arms around him, one hand coming up to play with Edward’s hair, the other resting in the small of his back. John closed his eyes and enjoyed the closeness, the warm water relaxing him and the smell of something sweet around him. Edward had a secret obsession with fancy bath stuff, so much so that John had to clear a cupboard out to house all the different bubble baths and oils. “What did you put in here?” John asked, unable to identify the smell. “Almond oil” Edward’s voice was sleepy and John wondered if his question had woken him up. “Makes your skin soft” Edward continued “has avocado in it too. It’s good.” John smiled and nodded, even though Edward couldn’t see him from where was. John ran his fingers over Edward’s back, tracing mindless patterns. He loved Edward’s skin, all the different bath products paying off and leaving Edward with silky smooth skin. Most of all John loved the freckles that were dotted around. Edward lifted his head and John could see he was sleepy, eyes heavy as he leaned in and kissed him.

John pushed forward, deepening the kiss, his hand lowering to Edward’s arse, running down over his thigh. They kissed slowly, savouring each other while John’s hand traced over the expanse of Edward’s skin. John could feel Edward getting hard against him and arched up into him, making Edward hum his approval against John’s lips. Edward’s hands came up and cupped John’s face while his hips bucked against him and it wasn’t long until they were both fully hard and rutting against each other.

Edward disconnected the kiss and tilted his head back, an invitation. John’s lips were on his neck instantly, kissing and licking, occasionally scraping his teeth against the sensitive skin and making Edward moan. John adored the sounds Edward’s made and tried his hardest to keep Edward making those sounds. Edward’s hand dipped under the water, running over the back of John’s thigh and over his arse. John bit down on Edward’s shoulder as Edward’s fingers found their way to John’s entrance, circling and teasing. Edward’s body moved against his, their erections pressing against each other’s creating wonderful friction.

“oh god John” Edward mumbled, pressing open-mouthed kisses just below his ear. John moved his leg to make room, resting it on the side on the edge of the bath, the cold air on his skin making him shiver slightly. Edward could move a lot better now, bucking his hips against John’s slowly, his fingers still rubbing against John’s hole. John closed his eyes, letting Edward surround him. The feel of his body, the smell of the oil and the gentle sounds of the water as they moved. “I love you” Edward whispered before biting down on his neck making John groan. “I love you more” John gritted out, slowly losing it. John cried out as two fingers gently entered him. He felt good and Edward was bending his fingers like he was searching, feeling around for something. John knew about the prostate from the times he’d fucked Edward but he had no idea it was that good as Edward found what he looking for, his fingers brushing against the spot, making John go to pieces.

“Fuck!” John wailed as Edward got it again, his other leg coming up to rest on the other side of the bath, dangling over the edge to open himself up for Edward. “You like that?” Edward purred, not allowing John to answer as he hit it again, drawing a long moan from him instead. John opened his eyes to see Edward smirking down at him, a wicked glint his eyes and John wanted to take a picture so he would never forget just how sexy he looked in that moment, stunningly beautiful, pale skin glowing in the dim light, eyes shiny.

Edward sat himself up fully, positioning himself between John’s legs and before John could register what was happening, Edward was sliding into him, his fingers replaced with his cock and John turned into a whimpering mess underneath him. It felt different to last time, it felt good, so good. John said Edward’s name through heavy breaths and Edward started to move, slowly pulling out, the tiniest bit before pushing back, bottoming out. He repeated this two more times before he hit John’s prostate, making him cry out, his hips twitching, one leg coming around Edward’s back, pushing him closer, deeper.

“Fuck John!” Edward moaned, his eyes falling closed. John watched him, his damp hair was clinging to his face and he was biting his bottom lip. John could just about see the redness of Edward’s cheeks and chest and as he lolled his head back John could see how uneven his breathing was. Edward’s knuckles were white from the grip he had on to the side of the bath, using it as leverage as he fucked into John faster. John’s took the sight in, understanding what Edward meant about feeling closer.

John felt a rush of emotion flow through him and he suddenly felt like crying. He was overwhelmed by everything and as he looked at Edward, he knew he had something special, someone special. John rested his hands on top of Edward’s and Edward opened his eyes, looking down at John and smiling, a kind of lazy smile that was so sincere and so Edward. John lost it then, his orgasm suddenly hitting hard and fast. John closed his eyes, a long cry of Edward’s name echoing around the tiled walls. John had never felt such an intense climax, Edward slowly fucking him through it, his hand on John’s dick, matching his rhythm, everything felt ten times more amazing.

Edward only lasted two more thrusts before he was coming, his back arching, burying himself deep Inside of John. John felt Edward pulsing inside of him before he collapsed on top of him, breathless. “Fuck John” Edward murmured, his voice strained. “That was so good” John smiled, certain that he was literally beaming. Edward breathed out a laugh and sat up, pulling out and making John wince at the sensitivity. “Told you” Edward smirked, rubbing his hands up and down John’s legs before slashing some water over John’s chest, washing his sticky skin.

John sat up and shivered. “Water’s too cold” he said as Edward lifted himself out. John got out too and grabbed a towel to wrap himself in. “How’d you feel?” Edward asked as he walked out to the bedroom. John followed him, thinking for a moment. “Good.” John answered. “Amazing actually!” He corrected, grabbing hold of Edward’s waist and pulling him into a messy kiss. Edward laughed, falling backwards into John’s bed, pulling John down with him. “We have the house to ourselves for ages” Edward said, pulling John’s towel away “let’s make the most of it. I think it’s your turn to fuck me.” John bit his lip as he looked down at Edward and he couldn’t help but think that Edward always had the best ideas.

[area50dununiverse]

I think we are in desperate need of some losing virginity fanfic in this fandom so like john + ed first time fic? please? you don't have to obviously just thought I'd ask! it would be so cute then all shaky with nerves and soothing each other and tears and scared to hurt the other one and 'do you feel any different' after and shyness so cute!

Hello! Your wish is my command! I tried to keep it light but y’know.. losing your virginity isn’t all rainbows and fairies! :) I’m calling it Skittles, just because… 

Read below, and I hope you like it!!

“Have you got the stuff?” Edward asked making John laugh. “You make it sound like I’ve been and brought drugs!” John giggled, climbing off from on top of Edward and reaching beside the bed for the carrier bag. “Tesco? Really John?” John looked up from the bag and frowned back at him. “Did anyone see you?” Edward asked as he watched John remove the few things he’d brought earlier that day. Edward’s question made John laugh harder as he shook his head. “No, relax.”

“Anyway,” John added, looking back at Edward “even if they did, do you really think they would care about an eighteen year old buying lube?” Edward rolled his eyes, lying down flat against his pillows again. “No one would suspect it’s for us anyway.” John said casually as he opened the purple box. “Like ‘oh he’s buying lube so he can fuck his brother!’”

“Stop it!” Edward shot back, face heating up. “Just hurry up or I’ll change my mind.”

“Okay-” John climbed back onto the bed, kneeling next to Edward. “I’ve got two types of lube, because I wasn’t sure which one,” Edward took one of the bottles from John and examined it. “And I got these for after-” Edward flicked his eyes up and frowned at his twin. “Skittles?”

“We’ll be hungry.” John said with a shrug and Edward was seriously wondering why he asked John to go and buy the stuff.

Edward opened the cap of the small bottle he was holding and smelled the contents. It smelled of nothing so he grabbed the one John was holding that he had pulled out of the purple box and did the same. “This one.” He decided and John agreed without question. “Smells fruity.”

John opened the draw next to the bed and put the other bottle inside along with the skittles before leaning over Edward and kissing his lips. “Okay, ready?” John breathed and Edward could feel his nerves, adding to his own. He nodded and tried to remember everything they had watched online. This had been carefully planned for weeks, as soon as they were told they had the house to themselves for the whole night. It was like studying for an exam and Edward watched and read so much stuff that it just clouded his mind and he couldn’t really remember anything.

“How do you wanna do it?” John asked, pulling Edward from his thoughts. Edward frowned and John sat back and clarified “on your knees or on your back?” And Edward could feel the heat radiating off his body. He wasn’t ever embarrassed in front of John, but this was all new, uncharted territory. “Back.” He mumbled. He wanted to to be able see John, kiss him. John nodded and reconnected their lips, wet and hot. John’s hand was moving from Edward’s chest, where it rested, down to his stomach, trailing further until it dipped into his shorts. Edward whimpered at the contact and pushed up into John, finally relaxing.

John stroked him a few times before his hand moved, traveling down past his balls and Edward held his breath, knowing exactly where John was heading. “Okay?” John asked as his fingers brushed over Edward’s hole, making him tense on reflex. Edward gave a nod and bent his knees, making it easier for John. He closed his eyes as John felt around with his index finger, the lightest of touches that made Edward shiver. “I need to prepare you first.” John suddenly pulled his hand out of Edward’s pants and Edward instantly missed it. He hadn’t realised how hard he had got from John’s touching and he  suddenly wanted more.

He watched John open the bottle and he could smell the fruityness as John squeezed some out into his hand. “Are you okay?” John asked as he slicked up his fingers. Edward nodded an answer and returned his question. John was nervous, Edward could tell. “Yeah, I’m good.” John smiled his face sincere and Edward returned it, suddenly feeling giddy. “Can you believe we’re doing this?”

John’s smile faltered slightly as he met Edward’s eyes. “I don’t wanna hurt you.” He said, his face worried. “I’ll be fine, I promise.” Edward reassured, the nerves returning. “It’ll be worth it.” He added, trying to reassure John, as well as himself. John nodded and added more lube to his fingers as Edward wiggled out of his underwear. John moved round so he was between Edward’s bent knees, his face unsure, lube running down his wrist where he added so much.

Edward gave a nod and John’s fingers were back on him, wet and cool against the skin. John circled Edward’s entrance, making Edward gasp above him. John slicked him up, and all Edward could feel was a wet feeling and John’s finger sliding over his skin. It was strange, but not bad. “Okay, ready?” John’s voice was shaky. Edward wondered if it because of his arousal or down to nerves. Edward nodded. He was unbelievably turned on, his fingers gripping the bed sheet beneath him, pulling it off the bed on one side. “Edward,” John said “say it.”

“Yes, yes John, I’m ready.” Edward rushed, forgetting about the talk he and John had about using words. Edward often forgot in the midst of passion, choosing to use gestures and grunts instead. John never minded but he decided to make a rule that Edward had to vocalise his feelings, telling him that it was important for John to know what he how feeling and if he wanted it.

John gave a nod and Edward felt a pressure, a strange pushing feeling that his body wanted to pull away from. Edward stayed still though, and soon John was pushing one finger in. John was shaking, Edward could feel him so he reached out and held John’s free hand. “I’m okay.” Edward told him before John got a chance to ask and John started moving his finger. It felt strange and intrusive but Edward didn’t think it was too bad.

“Do another.” Edward said after another few minutes of John bending his knuckle and opening him out with the one finger. “Sure?” Edward nodded again adding a quiet “yes”. John pulled his index finger almost fully out and added more lube before pushing back in, this time with his middle finger too. Edward arched his back and hissed through his teeth, his hand gripping John’s. “Slow!” Edward whined, tensing up around John’s fingers. John stopped his movements, holding the tips of his fingers inside Edward for a moment before pushing a little bit further and stopping again. “Is it bad?” John asked, worrying his bottom lip between his teeth. “No, no it’s good.” Edward mumbled, inhaling slowly and focusing on John’s movements.

Edward screwed his eyes shut, feeling uncomfortable. It burned and ached and Edward took a few deep breaths to relax himself. John made a small whimpering sound from above him and Edward opened his eyes and looked down to see John biting his bottom lip, eyes focused down to his fingers. He was hard and leaking and Edward felt a jolt of excitement just from seeing how undone John was from this. John’s fingers opened slightly and Edward realised that they were fully in, down to the knuckles.

“Okay?” John’s voice was uneven and husky and Edward hummed in response. “Words.”

“Yes.” Edward answered, moaning at the sensation of John’s fingers opening up inside of him. It wasn’t bad, now that they were fully in and he was distracted by John, thing about something else other than the stretch. Edward could still feel the burning but it wasn’t hurting so much. “Fuck.” John whispered, pulling his fingers out a little before pushing them back in. Edward whined, his back arching off the bed, muscles tensing at the intrusion.

John managed to get a third finger in after using a lot more lube and having a load more patience, going so slowly that Edward thought John must’ve been going crazy. Edward worried that he wasn’t adjusting quick enough. In all the videos he watched, it was all so easy and quick. “Does it feel okay?” Edward asked, his voice strangled. “Shouldn’t I be the one asking that?” John said, his fingers twitching, making Edward wince.

“Why is it taking so long?” Edward opened his eyes to look at John. “Because it just does. You need to be ready.” John’s eyes flicked up to Edward’s face and back down again as he bent a knuckle. “It doesn’t in porn.” Edward whined and John laughed. “Really? As if porn is realistic Ed.” Edward supposed John had a good point and concentrated on relaxing again, still feeling self conscious. “You’re doing so good.” John whispered. “So good.”

“I’m ready.” Edward told John after a few more minuets. “Please?” John had been lightly stroking Edward’s cock, teasingly slow and nowhere near hard enough but it worked in John’s plan to make him relax while he stretched him. Josh pulled his fingers out and Edward whined. It felt like it was too much, but not enough. He wanted more and felt himself getting more and more impatient. John squirted some lube onto his fingers, using it to slick Edward up again before coating his dick, whining at the contact.

He shuffled closer and Edward could feel John’s erection pressing up between his arse cheeks, wet and hot. “Ready?” John whispered, looking down at him. “Yeah.” Edward breathed, focusing on relaxing his body. “I’m scared.” John admitted and Edward’s heart fluttered at just how much he loved him. “It’s okay, I promise.” Edward pulled John down into a messy kiss, moaning into his mouth at the contact, their bodies pressed together. Edward felt John shift, his hand snaking down between their bodies, lining himself up. “Do it John.” Edward mumbled. John slowly pushed his hips forward and Edward quickly said “stop!” his voice too loud in the hushed room. John stopped straight away and checked Edward’s face, worry in his eyes. “Okay, go.. No, hang on.” John huffed out a laugh and so did Edward. It was ridiculous, Edward thought and shook his head. “Just do it.” He said, bracing himself and biting his lip to keep him from stopping John again. John leaned his forearms beside Edward’s head, dropping his head down to rest against Edward’s.

Edward immediately tensed up, a shot of pain running through him, making a pained noise. “Don’t stop-” he gritted out and John kissed him again, all over his face while he slowly pushed in further. Edward concentrated on breathing, inhaling and exhaling, steadying his breaths and relaxing his body. It hurt, worse than the fingers and John was panicking, Edward could see it on his face. “Keep going.” Edward hissed. “It’s okay.” A few tears ran down Edward’s face and John stopped moving, asking “shall I stop?” But Edward shook his head. They’ve got this far, Edward didn’t want to stop it all now. “Go.” Edward told him. John whispered into Edward’s ear, telling him how good he was and that he loved him. “You’re amazing..” John mumbled, hot breath on Edward’s cheek and Edward thought he was going to cry, emotion rushing through him at the tenderness of the moment. He gripped onto John and held him close, closing his eyes.

John slid the rest of the way in and something shot through Edward, making him cry out. “What was that?” John asked, alarmed, his eyes wide, looking horrified but Edward couldn’t speak, it was all too much. “Do- do it-” John pulled out a tiny bit before pushing back in, creating that bolt of pleasure to hit Edward again. “Fuck!”

“Is it good?” Edward opened his eyes to see worried eyes looking down at him. He nodded and mumbled a 'yes’ and John did it again, every nerve in Edward’s body tingling.

The ache was still there, similar to having cramp but whatever John was doing outweighed that. “Are you ok?” John asked again and Edward moved his hips, trying to get John to move. “Just go!” Edward all but wailed and John moved again, starting up a slow rhythm. “Does it hurt?” John asked, his voice strained. “No.” Edward lied, because even though it did hurt, it wasn’t too bad and with John hitting that certain spot every other thrust, Edward actually felt good. Felt great.

“There!” He cried out as John hit it again. John shifted himself and hit it again and again and Edward was a sobbing mess, his fingers digging into John’s biceps, body limp under John’s. Everything felt so good, so overwhelming. “Fucking hell Edward.” John mumbled, losing rhythm as he got closer to his climax. John wrapped his hand around Edward’s dick and it only took two strokes for Edward to come with a long, loud cry. John came a second after, bucking his hips and saying Edward’s name over and over, his voice loud and strained. Edward was glad that they planned it so they were home alone. It felt strange, feeling John come inside of him. Edward mostly just felt the waves hitting John, felt him twitching inside of him and a warmth, similar to what the lube felt like.

Edward winced as John pulled out, the ache worse than before. John flopped down next to him, catching his breath, sweaty and flushed. “Okay?” He breathed and Edward nodded. “Does it hurt?”

“It aches.” Edward answered, turning to face John. “But it’s okay.”

“Are you okay?” He watched John wipe his hand over his face and smile, turning his head to face Edward. “Yeah.” He grinned. “We’re not virgins anymore!” John laughed and Edward gave him a high five before leaning forward to kiss him, his body protesting at the movement. “I’m so sore.” Edward smiled, breaking the kiss and laying back down. The ache almost felt like a badge of honour. John gave him a sympathetic smile and turned, opening the draw and pulling out the bag of skittles. He laid back on his side facing Edward. “Do you feel different?” He asked as he opened the bag and fed one to Edward. Edward cringed, knowing exactly where John’s fingers had been, but he surprised himself at how much he didn’t actually care and accepted the sweets.

Edward chewed and thought for a moment. “Don’t think so. You?” John gave a shrug and popped a few sweets into his mouth. “I feel closer to you.” John told him, meeting his eyes. “Like, I’m the only one to ever see you like that. Be that close to you.”

Edward nodded in agreement. “I feel happy that you’re the only one who will ever be that close to me.”  Edward said with a smile. Truth was, he simply couldn’t imagine himself with anyone other than John and he knew John felt the same. “I feel like we should do that more often.” John added with a smirk. “Your turn next time.” Edward smiled and John laughed before agreeing with a nod. “The fingering was definitely the worse part.” Edward said as he reached into the bag. “I’m sorry.” John looked guilty, worried suddenly.

“But it got a lot better. Fuck, you should try it.” Edward fed John a few skittles, which he was happy to receive. “So good.” Edward confirmed. “We do have all night..” John purred, making Edward wince at thought, every nerve in his body screaming 'no’ at once. His body was aching, all his muscles hurt like he had been to the gym for three days straight but the thought of round two made Edward perk up, his dick showing interest at the thought. “Only if you’re lucky.” Edward teased before reaching for more skittles.

“Good idea on the skittles.”

[area50dununiverse]

If I asked very nicely would you write a fic where Edward is comforting John while he's crying? Like John is too embarrassed to cry in front of anyone but he's totally comfortable with Edward so he gets it all pent up and finally lets it out to Edward? Maybe in the cbb house after the big fight in the toilet with their mics off or as teenagers bc of bullying in school/x factor I'm not picky! Pretty please with sugar on top? I'd be forever grateful!

OMG you asked so nicely! You’re so lovely! I hope you like it!

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

There were many things that set John on edge. Being called names and being constantly accused of being defensive and fake, a game player and snide. He was none of those things and neither was Edward. They couldn’t even walk into a room without being shouted at for some ridiculous reason and it was getting to him.

He felt stupid, it was Big Brother at the end of the day, it’s the whole point of the show, fall outs and bitching. He could feel it chipping away at his patience with every mean comment and dirty look. John hated showing his vulnerable side, he was the strong one, the one that was supposed to protect Edward and look after the both of them.

There were so many times John had to bite his tongue. He couldn’t argue because he knew he would cry, an unfortunate reaction John had to getting angry. So he clenched his fist and walked away.

John would think about it just before he fell asleep at night, he would think about the way people spoke to him and the names they called him and Edward. It was like being at school all over again. John would close his eyes tightly, until he drifted off and start the next day anew, moving on and hoping they would give him a break from the nastiness.

But after seeing everyone’s nominations on the screen, John was fuming. Being constantly called names was wearing him down and John tried to make them understand how he felt. John could feel the sting behind his eyes, hear the edge to his own voice as he defended himself.

He didn’t want to raise his voice or argue but he snapped and he did and now he felt like shit. As soon as the argument was over, John headed for bathroom, shutting himself in the toilet and sitting with his back to the door to keep it closed.

He took off his microphone and carefully wrapped it in a towel so he knew he was completely alone, no one could hear anything. John took a few shaky breaths and tried to calm himself down when he heard a light tap on the door. John cleared his throat, not trusting his voice before calling “I’m in here” And hoping whoever it was would leave. “I know.” Edward’s voice answered. There was pressure on the door, pushing against John’s back so John moved to let him in, standing himself up.

Edward slipped in, instantly taking his own mic off, gently putting it on the floor. “Want help cleaning the bathroom?” He asked loudly before running the taps. John knew what Edward was doing and he thankful that he had him. John quickly took two big strides across the small room to get to Edward, who pulled him into a tight hug. “You did well.” Edward whispered quietly, keeping his voice low so the running taps would cover it. John buried his head in Edward’s shoulder, finally letting go and releasing a sob, tears streaming down his face and onto Edward’s white blazer.

Edward simply held him, one hand on the back of John’s head, his fingers stroking his hair, the other hand resting on John’s back. John couldn’t speak even if he tried so he just let the moment take him, let himself go and let Edward comfort him. John held the back of Edward’s blazer, putting his full weight on his twin. “You’re okay.” Edward mumbled. “Just let it out John and you’ll feel better, I promise.”

John nodded and stood himself up straight, catching sight of his reflection in the mirror above the sink. He was a mess. A red, blotchy, tearful mess. Edward used his thumbs to wipe away the tears, his hands bracing his head, making John look at him. “I’m proud of you.” He told him, adding “No arguments.” At John’s attempt to protest. John didn’t feel proud of himself, he was embarrassed that he let himself snap like that and he prayed that he hadn’t ruined everything for Edward.

“What if we get evicted now? The public might hate me.” John could feel the tears forming again and quickly wiped them away. Edward shrugged and told him “I’ll still be proud that you stuck up for yourself. It would be worth it.” John leaned into Edward again and closed his eyes as Edward held him tightly.

“I’m glad you’re here.” John whispered “I couldn’t do it without you.” “Yes you could.” Edward argued without missing a beat. John smiled to himself. It made him feel good knowing Edward had faith in him. “Don’t keep it to yourself.” Edward said, pulling away, holding John at arms length so he could look at him. “You should’ve talked to me, I’m here for you.” Edward’s eyes were sincere and John nodded. He felt a lot better, like a weight had been lifted and he figured crying wasn’t such a bad thing as long as he had Edward.

“Ready?” Edward asked after a few more minutes and John nodded, picking up his and Edward’s microphones and putting them on. “Okay-” Edward held the door and John slipped out first, closely followed by Edward. John fussed with his hair in the mirror and thanked god his face looked normal, like nothing had happened. Edward done the same, musing his own hair and catching John’s eye in the reflection. Edward smiled at him and there was something so reassuring in Edward’s smile that John felt like he could relax for a while. “Thanks Edward.” John mumbled before smiling back.

[area50dununiverse]

Prompt: j+e were raised in a very conservative home and went to a very conservative school and never spoke about sex at all. But one day their parents hear them giggling about something and force them to tell them what thinking they were up to no good to which they describe this thing they found that feels really good which to their parents horror is touching each other bc they only ever heard how babies are made and don't realise what they're doing is sexual cue pure angst as they're separated

Hello! I don’t know about this one, it all seemed a lot better in my head!! I really hope it’s okay!!!!!!

I hope you like it :) 

Read below as always XX

John’s mouth fell open, his muscles were tense and he couldn’t breathe, talk or think. All he could do was make a pathetic little squall, his legs twitching, body aching and a strange tightness in the pit of his stomach.

Edward stopped and looked at him, half smiling, half nervous. “Okay? Does it hurt?” He asked, still holding John. John’s hips involuntary twitched up into Edward’s hand, the tightness and the ache fading slightly.John nodded, panting out a “yeah, yeah it’s good” while his hips gave another twitch, desperate for Edward to just move again. “It feels like-” John tried to breathe, his brain trying to concentrate on anything other than Edward’s hand “something is building up, like, I dunno, something’s going to happen?”

Edward frowned at him and whispered “what?” But John didn’t know, couldn’t put it into words, everything was so strange, so good. “Here-” John mumbled, taking hold of Edward and stroking him quickly. Edward’s head fell back, his eyes closing.“Yeah that’s-” Edward whined, arching his back and pushing into John. “Oh god, it’s… It’s-”“I know” John grinned, watching Edward, momentarily forgetting about his own pleasure.

Edward was completely flushed and John knew something was going to happen, he could feel it. They had never done anything like this before, it hadn’t even entered John’s mind to touch himself like this, but he had started to wake up in the mornings uncomfortable and stiff. He had naturally panicked because he didn’t know what was happening to him. After the third time it happened, he had nervously asked Edward about it, asking if he should see a doctor.Edward’s eyes widened and he told him that the same thing had happened to him a few times, reaching for John’s quilt and pulling it off for a better look.

That’s when Edward had touched him. He had, of course, asked John first before John nodded because who cared if Edward touched him? They had seen each other naked countless of times. John was surprised at the pleasant feeling running through his body as Edward held him, looking for any indication of how to help him.He had moaned and told Edward about how good it felt and soon, Edward was in the same state as him, confused but feeling good.

“It’s so weird” John mumbled, watching Edward pant and buck his hips. Edward suddenly opened his eyes, wider than John had ever seen, inhaling a sharp intake of breath and John could actually feel his dick twitching in his hand before something happened that John was not expecting.

John went to pull his hand away, some sticky substance getting on him, but Edward grabbed him and put his hand right back, wrapping it around himself again and crying out. John watched with wide eyes, not sure what the hell was happening to him.

He had gone red, bright red, all over and he looked like he was in pain. Edward suddenly pushed John’s hand away with a small whimper and smiled at him, completely out of breath. “Let me-” Edward’s hand was back on John and he wasn’t even sure he wanted whatever that was to happen to him.

But that feeling was back and he couldn’t think of anything other than what was happening down there.

John felt that familiar tightening and he could hear Edward giggling before he suddenly couldn’t breathe. He was shaking and panting, every nerve in his body tingling. He felt like he was on fire and couldn’t see or hear anything but he was sure he was shouting.Suddenly everything felt too much and he needed Edward to stop so he pushed him away, feeling like his arm had weights tied to it.

“See?” Edward grinned, his eyes alight. John felt like jelly, completely boneless and so sleepy.“What the hell?” John smiled, closing his eyes. Edward laughed and so did John as he fell asleep.

John still felt amazing when he woke up a few hours later. It was midday and he was hungry. Edward was stirring beside him so he poked him to wake him up before getting up. Edward stretched and groaned, mumbling something about wanting food.“I feel nice” Edward smiled, making John laugh.“Me too” he added, turning his body to face Edward “that was crazy! What even was that Edward?”

Edward shrugged. “You were so loud!” He laughed.“It was so good” John giggled “so good!” John watched Edward for a moment before giving him a sly smile. “Shall we do it again?”Edward quickly nodded, brimming with excitement. John laughed again, a fit of the giggles taking him over, high-pitched and hysterical. He felt giddy and excited and he could feel the same tingling down there.

“What’s going on?” John heard their mum ask as their bedroom door opened. She put down a pile of clean clothes and looked at them with a small smile. “What are you up to? I’ve seen that look before and it always means trouble.”“We found the best thing!” Edward all but shouted at her “it was crazy mum!”

“Yeah” John added, “me and Edward did this thing, and it was like an explosion of-”“Feeling good” Edward butted in, finishing his sentence “and I thought I was going to die but it was a good feeling”

“What are you talking about?” Susannah asked, her face confused.“Like this-” John said, pulling on Edward’s bottoms and taking hold of him, only pumping his hand once before their mum was shouting at him, rushing forwards to grab him.John yelped as she pulled him away, making him fall off the bed. “What are you doing?” She shouted, “you can’t do that!”“Yeah we can, it worked last time,” John told her, confused by her outburst.

“You’re brothers” she stressed, gently pulling John to his feet and not letting go of his wrist.John looked at Edward and frowned. What was her problem?“Edward, stay there,” Susannah said as she lead John out of the room.“What’s wrong?” John asked, following her downstairs and sitting on the sofa at her gesture. “I’m calling your aunt Mary, I think you need to stay with her a few days.”

John nodded. He didn’t fully understand the situation but he loved staying with their aunt as she had horses and was generally quite cool. He wondered if Edward was packing a bag for them and wondered if he had known they were going the whole time.“Why am I down here?” John asked as she dialled the phone number. Susannah ignored him and left the room as soon as the phone was picked up on the other end.Edward appeared in the doorway and John smiled telling him “we’re going to Mary’s”

“I love it there!” Edward grinned “can I come down now?”John shrugged at him because he didn’t know “thought you were packing?” Edward sat next to John on the sofa and shook his head.“I didn’t know we were going,” he said just as their mother returned from the kitchen.

“Edward, didn’t I tell you to stay upstairs?”“Why?” Edward frowned “when are we going to Mary’s?”John suddenly sensed that there was something wrong. Their mum looked angry, maybe even sad and he didn’t know why. “Why are we even going? Is something wrong?” He asked, worried now.

“Just-” Susannah sighed “go upstairs and pack a bag, Edward I need you to come to the shop with me, the bags will be heavy.”John and Edward looked at each other with a frown. What was with her? “Now please?” She snapped, making them jump into action.

John ran upstairs and heard the front door shut as Edward left with their mum. He mindlessly picked up a few things and stuffed them in a bag. He packed Edward’s clothes too, knowing what he liked to wear.

John sat waiting for Edward and their mum to return. It had almost been an hour and he was starting to worry.There was a knock at the door so he went and answered, seeing Mary instead of Edward.“Ready?” She smiled, as soon as John opened the door.John shook his head “Edward’s not back. Mum needed his help at the shop.”

John watched her smile falter for a second. “Grab your bag and pop it in the car.” She told him, taking out her phone. John headed upstairs and grabbed his and Edward’s bag before heading back down and taking it to the car. “John, let’s just go, your mum will bring Edward once they’re done,” Mary said, opening the passenger door for him.“I don’t want to leave without Edward.” John frowned. He didn’t understand why everyone was acting so strange all of a sudden.

“Just get in.” Her voice was a warning, so John did as she asked. She started the car and pulled out of the driveway and John thought about asking what was even happening. He wondered if someone had died, an elderly relative passing was the reason for last time he and Edward were sent off to stay with Mary.They got to the end of the road when John saw Edward walking with their mum, both hands full of bags. “There he is!” John smiled “we can grab him now, I have his stuff.” They stopped at the red lights and Edward looked over the road, his face lighting up as he saw John in the car.

John waved and saw Edward’s face fall as their mum said something to him. “Why aren’t we stopping?” John frowned as they started moving again “he’s there, look.” Edward looked panicked and John saw their mum hold onto his arm as he took a few strides towards the road.“Edward isn’t coming. It’s going to be just you and me!” she said, trying to sound positive and happy but somehow failing. John panicked and looked over the road to where Edward was standing. “What?” He wailed “I’m not leaving without him,” he said, trying the door and finding it locked. He looked back at Mary “please” he mumbled “don’t take me away from him. This is kidnap!”

She gave him a sad look before John looked back at Edward, the car stopping behind the slow traffic. Edward was upset, he could see it in his face. “Ed!” John shouted, tapping the window “Mum! Ed!”“John, calm down,” Mary told him gently “it’s just for a week or two.”“What?” John snapped, his chest feeling tight, “that’s the whole half term! Mum said a few days!” The car started moving again, turning the corner and away from Edward.John watched Edward disappear out of sight and sunk down in his seat, tears falling.

“John, darling,” Mary said, her voice soft “don’t be upset, we’ll have fun.” John didn’t answer her, just stared out of the window thinking about Edward. He wondered how he had taken the news and wiped his face, trying to keep himself from crying even more.

It wasn’t a long drive back but the car was completely silent the whole way. They headed inside and John asked if he could go upstairs to his room before dinner.“I’ve made your bed” Mary smiled sadly, watching John leave.He sat on the bed and sighed. It was too quiet. He was lonely and it was horrible because he had never felt lonely before. He didn’t know what to do, or why he was even there and he missed Edward.

John sat and cried, at a loss of what to do. He didn’t know how long he was sitting there for before there was a knock at the door and Mary stepped in. “John?” She held out her phone, and told him “Edward is on the phone.”John snapped his head up and snatched the phone from her, his heart pounding. “Edward?” He asked, pressing the phone to his ear. Mary left the room and John laid down, curling up on his bed.“John, mum said it’s because of what we done.” Edward said, his voice shaky. “She said we need time apart because we can’t be doing sexual things.”

John had no idea what was that even meant. They weren’t being sexual, no way. They were two boys. “isn’t sex like, to make a baby?” John asked, missing Edward even more now that he could hear him.“She’s on her way over to talk to you, to explain. Although I still don’t get it.” Edward told him “I miss you John and I don’t think it was wrong.” Edward sounded like he had been crying and that made John feel even worse.“I don’t get it.” John mumbled, feeling sick. They stayed silent for a few seconds before Edward asked: “how long are you there for?”

John couldn’t hold it any longer and cried, trying to get his words out to answer the question. “Two weeks” he sobbed. “I don’t want to be apart”.“She’s wrong,” Edward said, referring to their mother. John didn’t answer, just let himself cry down the phone, feeling stupid and sad.

“I miss you” Edward repeated and John could hear that he was crying too. “We’ve never been apart before.”“Maybe mum will let me come home?” John suggested hopefully.“Maybe. I don’t think we can do that anymore John” Edward said with a sigh.

“I think mums here-” John sat up and strained his ears. He could hear her voice and footsteps coming up the stairs. “She’s coming. Can you call back later?”“I don’t know if I’m allowed” Edward grumbled and John sighed.“Okay, I’ll speak to you as soon as I can,” John said, not wanting to hang up.“John-”“Yeah?” John heard Mary and his mum in the hall and pressed the phone harder to his ear, not wanting to let Edward go.“I love you.” Edward told him sadly, crying again.“I love you too” John croaked before hanging up just as the door opened.

They walked in and John looked towards the window, watching some birds fly across the sky. “John, I know you’re mad but-”“Take me home.” John said, still not looking at anyone. He couldn’t, he was too angry and confused and he didn’t want to cry. The bed dipped as Susannah sat down beside him.“It’s for the best. What you did was wrong and you need to take some time apart. You like it here-”“Not without Edward I don’t.” John snapped, feeling just a tiny bit guilty for saying that in front of Mary. “I don’t like anything without Edward.”

“Exactly.” She said “you’re too close. You’ve merged into one person.” John rolled his eyes, still looking at the sky. “Family don’t do that stuff, you can’t be sexually involved with your brother John.”“I’m not” John snapped, looking at her for the first time. She looked guilty and sad which took John aback slightly.“What you two done, was sexual.” John looked at Mary, who was looking at her feet and back to his mum.

“You only do things like that with people you love.” Susanna went on, her eyes burning into John.“I love Edward though” John mumbled. This was just confusing him even more and the chance of going home was looking nonexistent.“See? You’re confusing your feelings. Of course, you love him, as your brother, your best friend, but not in that way.”

“What way?” John asked, looking between Mary and his mother. “You have sex to have a baby; one boy, one girl. That’s not what me and Edward were doing!” John was getting impatient and annoyed now. He could feel himself losing his temper and took a breath.“You should have told them this stuff years ago.” Mary piped up, earning a look from Susannah. “Poor boys are confused.”

“Just go” John snapped. “If I can’t come home, go.” There was a pause where no one moved or spoke. John chewed his lip thinking about Edward and how much he missed him. He thought back to that morning and what he and Edward had done. There wasn’t anything bad in it, he thought, just a bit of fun. He couldn’t see why everyone was acting like it was the end of the world.

He heard the door close and looked up to find an empty room with relief. He could hear arguing from downstairs and curled up on his bed again, clutching Mary’s phone. He wondered if he should call Edward but didn’t know if he could take it. Hearing his voice felt like too much.

It had only been a couple of hours, but John had always had Edward there beside him. Even when he showered, Edward would sit on the loo seat and chat to him. Suddenly, he was alone, and he felt like half a person, like something had been torn away.

John heard his mum leave but didn’t go down to say goodbye. John carried on laying in bed until Mary called him for dinner so he headed downstairs. He was hungry but sickly and didn’t really feel like eating much. They sat opposite each other to eat, John pushing his food around his plate in silence.“Did anyone ever talk to you about sex and relationships?” Mary asked after a while. John shrugged, trying to think back to his sex education lessons. Their school was strict catholic, and they were only taught a tiny bit. You grew up, got married and had babies, that’s the way it went. Sex wasn’t fun or pleasurable, just something you had to get done in order to reproduce. There was nothing else to know.“I know how babies are made if that’s what you’re asking” John muttered, taking a mouthful of food.

“No, like relationships” she pushed “the different types of relationships, changes in your body and that sort of thing?” John’s cheeks heated up because he really didn’t want to be having this conversation with his aunt, but it seemed he had no choice in the matter as she started filling him in with all the relevant information.John was actually grateful because he didn’t know about the things she was telling him and he could finally see why his mother freaked out. He still didn’t think it was wrong but he kept that to himself.

He couldn’t believe there was so much to it, it was all so complex and complicated. John thought about his relationship with Edward and how much he loved him, trying to compare it with the sort of love Mary had told him about. The thought of kissing Edward didn’t phase him in the slightest, he actually quite liked the idea. He compared that feeling to their older brother, trying to imagine himself kissing Kevin and not being able to. It disgusted him and made him cringe to even think about Kevin like that. “Do I love Edward?” John asked, his food long forgotten about.Mary smiled and shook her head “not like that, no” she said, “you’re very close and you must love him like mad, but it’s brotherly.”

John nodded. He wanted to ask why he didn’t feel the same way towards Kevin, why the thought of kissing Edward didn’t make him cringe. He didn’t though, deciding to let it drop. “Can I go to bed?” John asked, wondering how he was going to sleep without Edward. Mary nodded and John excused himself, going back to his room and getting undressed. He thought about everything Mary had told him, trying to keep his mind away from thinking about Edward.John debated if he was gay but decided he couldn’t be as he wasn’t attracted to boys. He wasn’t really attracted to girls either when he thought about it. Whenever he tried to think of someone he actually liked, all he thought about was Edward.

The room felt too quiet. John had no one to talk to and it made him restless. He wondered what Edward was doing and whether he felt the same. John felt sad thinking about Edward being lonely and hoped that he wasn’t too upset. John laid there for hours until he couldn’t take it anymore, he needed to call Edward so he snuck downstairs and quickly grabbed the phone before running back upstairs.

He called his house, praying Edward would answer and wondered what would happen if anyone else answered. Would they tell him he couldn’t speak to Edward? He didn’t really want to talk to anyone else.The phone was picked up on the first ring and John was relieved to hear Edward’s small “hello?”“Edward?” John smiled, clutching the phone for dear life.“John-” Edward was crying, making John’s stomach twist uncomfortably.

“It’s not the same without you” Edward whispered and John guessed that everyone was in bed.“I miss you, ” John told him, his chest tight, “Mary told me some stuff about relationships and sex, ” he said, also lowering his voice. “I have so much to tell you once I’m home.”“Why are we being punished?” Edward asked, still upset.“Because we’re not supposed to be acting like a couple Edward. It’s wrong.” John said, “but I don’t think it is, do you?”“No” Edward grumbled, his breath hitching. John wanted to comfort him, hug him and tell him that it’s okay, but most of all, he wanted Edward to do the same for him.

“Edward, I have to go,” John said suddenly, as he got an idea. “I promise I’ll talk to you soon, okay?”“Why?” Edward snapped “don’t go-” John felt a pang of guilt but he knew what he had to do. “Trust me, I’ll see you soon. I love you.”  He only just caught Edward saying a quick “love you” before he hung up and looked outside.It was dark as it was almost 11pm but he didn’t mind the dark so much.  He got up and dressed before grabbing his bag and sneaking downstairs and out the front door.

He vaguely knew the way home and guessed it would take him at least two hours to walk it if he went through the fields, which was a safer option. John looked back at the house before he started walking in the direction of home.

He had been walking for half an hour before, in typical Irish form, it started to rain. He cursed and briefly wondered if this was god’s way of telling him that all his teachers were right about what was a sin and what wasn’t but he quickly dismissed that thought. He and Edward weren’t sinners and even if they were, at least they were sinners together.

It was cold and he was wet and John didn’t dare think about how long he had left to go. He also didn’t let himself think about any murders that could be lurking. An hour into his walk and John was starting to think he was never getting home. He had no way of knowing the time or contacting anyone and he was seriously thinking that this was the stupidest thing he’d ever done.

He recognised where he was though and had a burst hope run through him, knowing how close he was. He thought about Edward, tucked up in bed and thought about seeing him. His mum will go mad, he knew that for sure but he didn’t care too much. John knew they would all be in bed so he hoped he wouldn’t have to deal with them until the morning. It had finally stopped raining, leaving him wet through and cold.

John started into a run once he could see his road, running down the street as fast as he could carry himself. He knocked on the door and startled as it flew open and his whole family was standing there, minus Edward. “John!” His tearful mother wailed, pulling him into a tight embrace “where have you been? Did you walk here? We’ve been out of our minds!”“Look at the state of you,” his dad said, pulling at John’s wet coat. John held his mum back, shocked that anyone even knew he was missing.

“Mary called and was frantic, we’ve been looking for you” his mum cried before John heard footsteps running down the stairs.“John!” John vertically pushed his mum off him to catch Edward, who flew at him from the third step up. “I’m so glad you’re okay” he was crying into John’s shoulder, holding him so tight John worried he would break a bone.“It’s almost 1am, anything could’ve happened, Susannah said from beside Edward. "I should call Mary and tell her, she’s worried sick too!”

John’s mind was reeling. He felt guilty for causing panic but glad he was finally home and with Edward. He felt whole again, like one complete person.

Edward was still crying but smiling as he pulled away and said “you need to change” before pulling him towards the stairs. “Is it okay?” Edward asked, pausing on the second step, hand held in John’s. Susannah looked at them and nodded with a smile. “I’m sorry,” she said “you won’t be separated ever again. You can’t be without each other, tonight has proved that.”

Edward ran up the stairs, pulling John behind him before slamming their bedroom door shut. “I was so worried,” Edward said, looking at John but before John could answer, Edward’s lips were on his. John’s brain couldn’t take anymore, everything was too much but as he melted into Edward, he didn’t care about anything else.

Edward pulled away and pulled off John’s coat. “You’re freezing” he mumbled before undoing his jeans. “I’m so glad to be home.” John told him “I missed you, Edward.”

“I missed you too,” Edward told him, peeling his t-shirt off of him.

“Mary said you can only do things with the person you love, ” John said, “but I love you.”

Edward met his eyes and smiled. “Get in bed” he ordered, “warm up.” John did as he was told and dived under the blankets, glad for the warmth. Edward joined him, his hand disappearing under the quilt. “I love you too” he whispered, kissing John’s lips again.“At least we know to keep it a secret now.” He smiled wickedly, his hand running up John’s thigh. John decided that everything he had to tell Edward could wait.

[area50dununiverse]

Prompt if that's okay?? John sleeps with loads of people but is always on top because he's too scared/not trusting enough to be on bottom but when he does it with virgin!edward he decides he wants it to be a first time for him as well and is on bottom and gets really emotional and nervous about it (ps I love your fics sooooooo much!!)

Hello!! I’m so sorry this took so long!! I was super excited about this one and started it but then stuff happened in my life and I stopped writing for a little while! It’s also a bit angsty because when I went back to it, I was feeling all angty.. There is also smut because, who doesn’t love angsty smut?

Anyway!!! I hope you like it, sorry for any mistakes, I haven’t read it 100s of times like I normally do!! Please do not be put off with prompting me!! I promise to be quicker! xxxx

John cried out, a line of sweat running down his face. He was breathless and boneless and he could see bruises forming on Mark’s hips from where his fingers had been. He flopped down on to the bed and watched Mark do the same beside him.They lay in silence, the only sound in the room was their heavy breaths. John thought about Edward, his mind wondering to the thought of him sleeping at home. He always thought about Edward after he’d hooked up. He sometimes thought about him during the hook up but John didn’t like to dwell on that.Mark was falling asleep so John slowly and quietly got up and collected his clothes. He never stayed long, always keen to get back to Edward. He felt wobbly on his legs, feeling like he’d just had an intense workout, although, he supposed he technically had. It was fast and hard and John didn’t stop for one second to consider how hard he was fucking into Mark. He wasn’t complaining so John figured he was into it anyway. He left quietly, throwing Mark’s number in the bin as he passed. He knew he wouldn’t use it. He never did.Edward was asleep when John got home. It was almost 1am but John couldn’t help peeking into Edward’s room. He stirred under the blankets but didn’t wake up so John quietly closed the door before going to his own room.Edward woke him up the next day far too early for John’s liking. “Who was it this time?” Edward casually asked, John picking up on the judgmental tone of his words. “Dunno” John answered, watching Edward open up his curtains. He wished he wouldn’t. “Mark was his name.” He added, thinking back to dark haired man.Edward nodded, his face completely disinterested. But then again, John supposed, why would he be interested in his twin’s sex life? John stretched under his quilt and closed his eyes against the bright light. “Get up” Edward said as he walked out John’s room.He and Edward had gone out for lunch at John’s suggestion. John loved going out, loved chatting to and meeting new people. Edward was less enthusiastic. John would never describe Edward as being shy, he had no issues talking to people, but he was just more reserved than John was.Hardly anyone paid them any mind as they sat and ate. All the local people were used to seeing them around and they only got stopped twice by a couple of girls who recognised them. Edward was relaxed and so was John as they chatted and laughed together.John looked up, feeling someone’s eyes on him. There was a man looking at him from where he was sitting at the bar. He smiled when John looked and John smiled back before looking at Edward and commenting on the music that was playing. Edward said something back to him about the song that was playing but John didn’t quite catch it as he flicked his eyes up to the guy, his attention elsewhere. He smirked and lifted his drink with a nod of the head and John smiled again, holding his gaze.“Hello?” Edward snapped, winning John’s attention back. “Sorry I was-” John flicked his eyes over Edward’s shoulder to where the mystery man was sitting and smirked. Edward turned around, following John’s gaze and huffed. “Honestly, can’t you go anywhere?” He turned back to John with a frown and John laughed.“What? I can’t help it” he defended. He watched Edward fiddle with the napkin for a moment before asking “why haven’t you done it?” In a hushed voice. Edward shot him a look that John recognised as the ‘drop it before I punch you’ look but John wanted to know. Edward always got defensive around the subject even though they were so open and honest about everything else. John couldn’t understand why. It was almost as if Edward was scared of the thought of actually having sex.The only time they had ever actually spoke about it was after Edward caught a guy sneaking out of their house after spending the night with John. Edward had got pissy about it and ended up calling John a slut when he had asked John in a temper and John couldn’t quite remember how many guys he had actually been with. He figured Edward had a point but it still confused him. Edward hadn’t even had a date with a man, let alone anything more. At first, John put it down to being embarrassed that he was gay but as John was so open around Edward, it just didn’t make sense. They were 25 years old and Edward was like an awkward teenager.“Come on Ed?” John pushed, the man at the bar forgotten about. Edward shrugged, his cheeks pink. His fingers tore little holes into the napkin and John watched him again before leaning in. “Do you really think I’m a slut?” John asked, catching Edward’s attention, his fingers suddenly still. “No” he answered and John believed him. “I just want you to be careful. It won’t take much for people to find out. People will tell.”Bingo. That was it. It all came together in John’s head; that Edward was scared to have relationships just in case someone found out. They weren’t public about their sexuality or any partners they have or haven’t had and Edward was scared. John reached out and put his hand on Edward’s. He didn’t know why he’d done it but he suddenly wanted to touch him, to be closer to him. Edward met his eyes and smiled before sitting up and changing the subject completely.John sat and listened to Edward talk about a song he was working on, moving his hand from from where it was holding Edward’s. He watched him closely and couldn’t help but think that whoever Edward did end up with would be the luckiest person ever.On the way out John bumped into mystery man who gave him an inviting smile that John would’ve normally jumped at. “Hey” he smiled, stepping in front of John. Edward carried on walking, heading outside to where their über was waiting. John said hi and stepped around the man, smiling one last time before following Edward.Edward looked genuinely surprised to see John getting in the car with him. “I thought you were going to go with him” Edward said, aiming for a casual tone but still sounding unsure. “Nah” John shrugged “you were going to show me that song.” John watched Edward smile before he looked out the window, his face turned away from John’s. John hated the though of Edward thinking he would choose a stranger over him. John looked back and Edward and caught his eye with smile. He would never put anyone before Edward.•David kissed John hungrily, his hands roaming over his body. John reached for the condom that he had left on the bedside and fumbled with opening it. “That’s mine” David purred as he kissed down John’s neck making John smirk. That wasn’t how it worked.“No. I don’t bottom” John said firmly, making David pull away to look at him. “Neither do I” David frowned. John gave a shrug of his shoulder. “Well you do tonight” he smiled, knowing full well how much David wanted him. David seemed to consider that for a moment before shaking his head. “It’s that or nothing” John said firmer than before. He wasn’t going to budge on this one. It was his one rule; that he wouldn’t ever bottom and anyone that had a problem with it, ended up alone.“Fine” David sighed, grabbing the lube and pulling off his pants. John smiled wider and kissed him again, as a sort of reward. He knew David would give in, most of them did.John had never been a bottom and he liked it that way. He was well aware that it hurt and he also knew that most men, a bit like himself, just wanted a quick, hard fuck with no regards to person beneath them. No. John wasn’t going to be a bottom.Just like the other times, John didn’t stay long afterwards. He left in a hurry to get home to Edward. John always hated leaving him, hated it when they were apart but he had needs and being with Edward in those moments didn’t help at all. He would find himself thinking about Edward, mental images flashing behind his eyes that no brother should ever have. John didn’t want to admit it to himself, didn’t want to think about all the times he got off to the thought of Edward on his knees. So instead, John went looking for people who would make him feel good, make him forget about Edward for a little while, although it never worked. He never forgot about Edward.Edward was in bed, sitting in front of the laptop when John got home. He said something about tweeting fans as John sat next to him, maybe a bit too close, and John agreed to whatever it was he said. “Good night?” Edward asked. The tone in his voice daring John to actually answer that so he stayed silent.“I’ve missed you” Edward said out of nowhere, making John’s heart sink. “You’re always out these days.”“I’ve missed you too” John honestly said, looking at Edward. He just shook his said and huffed out a “no you haven’t” as he turned back to the screen. “How can you miss when you’re-” Edward didn’t finish but he didn’t have to. His words stung John more than Edward had meant them to and John rested his head on Edward’s shoulder just to be closer to him.They stayed like that for a while, John resting against Edward while he tapped away on the laptop. John had started falling asleep when Edward spoke again, leaning forward to put the laptop down beside the bed. “John” Edward nudged, making John sit up with a groan “I said I’m going to bed.”“Can I stay here tonight?” John asked, already wiggling out of his jeans and getting under the covers. Edward smiled and nodded, getting under himself too, the dim light of the lamp casting a yellow glow over his face. They hadn’t shared a bed for long because John was always too scared. John loved sleeping next to Edward and they would often share beds growing up but he had woken up with enough awkward boners to make him put a stop to the habit. He missed it though and he thought that Edward did too.John inched closer to rest his head on Edward’s shoulder again just as he turned to talk, John’s face clashing with Edward’s. Something inside of him made him push further, pressing his lips to Edward’s in a chaste kiss, completely ignoring the half of his brain telling him to stop.It only lasted a few seconds as John pulled away in a panic. He knew Edward was going to freak out and he would have to tell him how he felt, how he really felt inside. Edward’s eyes were wide with shock and John felt himself tear up. “Ed, I’m so sorry I-”“Do it again” Edward whispered and John wondered if he imagined it. Wishful thinking maybe, but then Edward said it again and John was leaning in and connecting their lips. He kissed Edward properly this time, moving his lips against his slowly and gently. He felt like crying all over again, not even sure why.His hand came up to cup Edward’s face, his thumb rubbing back and fourth on Edward’s cheekbone. John lightly ran his tongue over Edward’s lips fully aware that Edward had never kissed another person before. It gave John butterflies at the thought of being Edward’s first kiss. He suddenly felt nervous as John wanted it to be perfect, a kiss Edward would never forget no matter how many other people he kisses.Edward opened up and John licked into his mouth. It wasn’t rushed or rough like John was used to and he loved it. John was purposely being gentle with Edward, his tongue moving around his slowly and carefully. Edward was hesitant and John could sense his nervousness so pulled away with a smile that said all he had to. Edward smiled back, his cheeks pink. “John” Edward mumbled, flicking his eyes over John’s shoulder “I want to.. You know?”John frowned back at him, unsure if he understood. It had always been such a big deal for Edward and John thought he couldn’t possibly be asking what he thought he was. “You’ve never done it” John stated dumbly, kicking himself as Edward blushed deeper. “I know. I want it to be you” Edward almost whispered, adding “I’ve always wanted it to be you John.”John leaned down and kissed Edward with everything he had. He couldn’t speak, couldn’t put any words to how he was feeling so he just kissed him, the tears brimming his eyes again. Edward gained a little confidence and kissed John back, making John hum his approval against his lips.John moved his lips over Edward’s jawline and down his neck, biting a few spots here and there. He listened to the little sounds Edward was making and smiled against his skin. He sounded beautiful and John couldn’t wait for the real noise to begin. Edward was just wearing a pair of boxers which allowed John to kiss down his chest, licking and nipping.John moved back up Edward’s body until he was kissing his lips again. John’s hips twitched forward, pressing against Edward’s thigh and making Edward moan. “Please John?” He whispered, his words slightly muffled by John’s lips. John sat back and looked down at Edward, fully taking him in. He couldn’t believe how much he loved him and although John had always known, he had never let himself fully appreciate Edward, didn’t dare to stop and think about just how much he loved him.John pulled the t-shirt he was wearing off, leaving him in just his pants. Edward’s eyes were all over John, and it took John back at just how ready Edward was. John desperately wanted to move things along and as he thought about getting the lube, he thought about Edward fucking him, could almost see the way his hips would thrust into him. John felt a shiver down his spine and mumbled something about lube as he got off the bed and rushed to his own room.John opened his draw and picked out his favourite one, imagining himself slicking Edward up with it. He paused for a moment to reconsider. He had never wanted to be a bottom, it was his number one rule but he suddenly couldn’t get the thought out of his head. He wanted Edward to top, wanted to feel what it was like. There was no question in John’s mind to whether he could trust Edward because he would trust him with his life. John felt himself bubble with excitement as he rushed back to Edward, lube in hand.“It’s my favourite” John said as he gently threw the bottle towards Edward. “Oh I’m honoured” Edward said, his voice dripping with sarcasm as he picked up the bottle to inspect it. “I’ll show you what to do” John told him as he knelt on the bed, watching Edward. John met Edward’s nervous eyes and gave him a reassuring smile. “It’s okay” John said softly “you can top”. John felt the same wave of excitement rush through him, a kind of nervous excitement that made him want to giggle.Edward gave a nod which told John that he didn’t know what he meant and John smiled again as he kissed Edward, pulling him down on top of him as he settled against the pillows. John held Edward’s hips and encouraged him to move, pulling him back and fourth against himself. Edward was making those little noises again and John felt dizzy with excitement.Edward leaned over John and pressed a kiss to his lips again, grinding down on him and moaning. “Edward,” John whispered “take off-” John ran his fingers around the waistband of Edward’s briefs so Edward climbed off and quickly slipped them off. John done the same and Edward was blushing, his eyes flicking from John’s face down to his lap. It all suddenly became very real and John internally panicked, his mind running through the things that could go wrong. What if Edward changed his mind? What if he hated it? What if John couldn’t do it?“John?” John looked back at Edward, his face worried. “What’s wrong?”“I’m nervous” John admitted. There was no point in lying, Edward could always tell. “Why?” Edward frowned “it’s not like you haven’t ever done it before.”“I’ve never done it with someone I care about though” John said, watching Edward closely. Edward broke into a smile before shifting forward and taking his place back in John’s lap. “Just tell me what to do” Edward whispered against John’s lips, sending shivers up his spine.John gently pushed Edward back so he was kneeling between his legs and grabbed the bottle of lube from his hand. “Like this” John said as he squeezed a generous amount into his hand before reaching between his own legs. He had done this countless of times with his fingers and expertly slipped two fingers in. Edward gasped and John closed his eyes, throwing his head back and mumbling Edward’s name. “What do you want?” Edward whispered, his eyes transfixed on John, making it all too much.John showed Edward what to do and Edward took over, his touch making John flinch. He was worried that he wouldn’t be able to do it, that it would all be a let down for Edward.  Edward touched him again and John jumped, his breath hitching. “What’s wrong?” Edward asked, snatching his hand away. “I’ve never done it like this before” john mumbled, his cheeks flushed. Edward frowned back at John and asked “why?”“I don’t want a stranger fucking me!” John all but wailed before calming himself down a bit “it’s new for me too.” Edward gave him a smile and slowly moved his hand back and slipping a finger inside. “We can learn together.” He smiled, making John smile too, his body relaxing.  "Kiss me Edward.“ He said as he leaned forward to to connect their lips, Edward’s fingers inside of him.Edward was slow and gentle, his touches purposeful. “I’m ready” John moaned, his hands gripping Edward’s biceps. Edward made a humming sound and pulled his fingers out, making John grunt. “Just.. Just-” John tossed the lube towards Edward, hoping he would get idea of what he couldn’t bring himself to ask.Edward looked down at John, his bottom lip between his teeth. “Sure?” He mumbled, nudging closer. John frantically nodded, opening his legs wider to hurry Edward along. Edward got the hint and pushed forward, his hands gripping John’s hips. John felt the burn, a stretch but it was okay because it was Edward and he knew Edward wouldn’t hurt him.Edward moaned loudly, letting his head loll back. His fingers pressed into John’s hips as he tried to restrain himself, inching in slowly. John’s back arched off the bed, his breath completely stolen. He was saying Edward’s name over and over and Edward soon pushed all the way in, making John cry out. “You okay?” Edward breathed, stroking John’s hair from his face. John couldn’t help but think their roles had been reversed, like John was the virgin and Edward had been doing it for ages. Edward was naturally caring and went on automatic, taking control of the situation to make sure John was okay.John tapped Edward and grunted out a sharp “move” and Edward was moving his hips in the best way possible. John opened his eyes and looked at Edward. He looked amazing, much better than what John guessed he himself looked like. Edward had a glow about him, radiant and beautiful. John wanted to tell him but just at that moment, Edward angled his hips and hit John’s prostate straight on, causing him to almost scream.Edward was quickly loosing it too and his thrusts were getting sloppy, missing the spot. “Do that again!” John told him, wrapping his legs around him to encourage him. Edward concentrated and hit it again like a pro and John could feel himself getting closer. Twice more and John was coming, his muscles tense, hips wildly bucking and the filthiest words spilling from his lips. It hit him hard and he swore he’d blacked out for a second, only just registering the fact Edward was coming too.John opened his eyes and watched him, his mouth hanging open, eyes squeezed closed. John waited for Edward finish before pulling him down for a lazy kiss and Edward collapsed on top of John. After a few moments of catching his breath, Edward sat up and pulled out, making John wince at the sensitivity. He flopped down beside him but stayed close, cuddling up to him.  John wrapped his arms around him and pulled him into a tight hug, their legs entwined. John ached and took a moment to think about how he felt.  It was a pleasant kind of ache, a dull throb that made him smile because it was Edward and everything was perfect.“Do you feel different?” John asked Edward, trying to remember his first time and how he felt afterwards. He didn’t feel any different, not that he could remember anyway, but this was so different. Edward looked thoughtful for a moment before breaking out into a wide grin. “I feel good” Edward said, practically beaming “really good.” He added, making John laugh. They fell back into silence, the air around them heavy. John thought about getting up for a wash but he was so comfortable laying with Edward that he couldn’t drag himself away.“Please don’t sleep anyone else” John heard Edward whisper, his voice tiny and fragile. John gave him a squeeze and kissed the top of his head. “I promise” John mumbled “I only ever done it to make myself stop feeling things for you” Edward tilted his head so he was looking at John. “Why?” John shrugged at that and huffed out a breath. “Because it’s not normal” he answered simply. “I thought you would hate me.”Edward leaned up and kissed John’s lips before saying “I couldn’t hate you John.” Everything felt so right, so comfortable with Edward. John didn’t want to leave him, he wanted to stay wrapped up in him forever. It was so different to what John was used to. “This is it now” John smiled, pecking Edward’s lips once more “you and me forever.” Edward smiled and broke into a breathy little giggle before saying “forever” and kissing John just one more time.