#just because i brought up the henrik storyline from last year

[lonelier-version-of-you]

It’s so weird that Holby brought Roxanna back, really. I mean, I’m not criticising it, if anything I think they should have kept her on longer because she could’ve been such an interesting character (and was such an interesting character, in the moments where they actually let her be her own person instead of a vehicle for male characters’ dramas) and Hermione Gulliford is great. (Also, I still feel like Rox and Ange would have been great friends.)

It’s just that, when you think about it, it was an odd choice to bring back a guest character from four years prior like that. Especially since they didn’t even use the Tara connection that much really, except to give things like Ollie taking a bullet for the woman who operated on his wife leading to her death more impact, but then surely “Ollie takes a bullet for a woman he barely knows” would still have impact in a similar way? And Rox obsessing over helping Ollie would still make sense as a way of avoiding her grief and of trying to “make it up to him” if she hadn’t been involved with Tara’s case. (I don’t recall her and Henrik ever talking about Tara in that stint, either, and they didn’t have to per se but it would’ve been nice to have her referenced even briefly, as we know Henrik cared quite deeply for her.)

And she was mainly there for the Gaskell storyline, really, which meant they had to retcon her into being a med school friend of Henrik’s when they barely knew each other in her first stint. (That retcon wasn’t too bad though, it was when they started doing the “She’s actually been the love of Henrik’s life all along!” stuff that it got laughable.)

And it’s just like... I don’t know, at that point they might as well have just created a new character instead of using Roxanna. Did they really want to make a few references to Tara so much they had to use Rox? I’d say “maybe they just really loved and wanted Hermione Gulliford, valid of them honestly” but then if it were that, they wouldn’t have killed her character off for manpain. All that effort they went to to bring her back and retcon in a history with Henrik and John and they just threw her away after a year or so anyway.

At the very least, they shouldn’t have done the “Rox was the real love of Henrik’s life!” nonsense. It did both characters a disservice, and it was ultimately pointless anyway because they eventually gave in and admitted John was the love of Henrik’s life (see: John’s last few episodes). The screentime spent on that could’ve been spent on giving Rox stuff to do that didn’t revolve around men.

[auroraayyye]

SKAM: An analysis

Part 1

This is not anything anyone has ever asked for, but I can’t sleep so here you go. A personal analysis of my likes, dislikes and favourite characters from every version of SKAM. Starting of with:

SKAM (The OG, Norwegian one)

Likes:

My own language and culture

A well written interesting teen show that tackled important problems you meet in life and brought out stories you didn’t see much of in media at the time.

The cast consisted of litteral teens. Tarjei who played Isak was a first year at the real school «Nissen».

The actors were so good. They all played such important roles, and you could tell they put a whole lot of personality into it.

I LOVED the format. SKAM has a lot of references to Henrik Ibsen (norwegian author), and he was known for writing plays in a style that in norwegian is called «Titteskap teater» (rough translation: a cupboard you can look into). The minimizes the distance between the audience and the action, creating much more debate around the plot. By giving us the clips online while they were happening «in real time» and giving the characters real SoMe accounts SKAM did exactly that. (Our teacher would seriously pause the class if any clips came out during).

I also liked how short the clips were. I don’t watch a lot of shows as I simply don’t have the time or attention span. But watching 2-10 minute clips and reading small text exchanges, thats something i could do!

None of the characters were «simple». They were all written and acted quite dynamic, deep and dimentional, and i loved that.

SKAM was brought up so goddamn much in our norwegian classes i swear. I did so many papers on it.

Unpopular opinion: i liked that it ended after 4 season. Ended on a high.

GREAT SOUNDTRACK

Dislikes:

SKAM is made in certain part of Oslo, which is the capital and biggest city of Norway. I don’t think it should’ve been changed, I just didn’t relate to a lot of the cultural youth references as I am from the north myself. And yes those enviroments are very different! So I just feel like letting the fandom know that that not all of norwegian is definitely like that.

They definitely could’ve done more with Sana’s season. I do not think that it was a bad season, i just think that there was too much focus on Noorhelm and girl drama which were topics that didn’t really need more focus.

Eva’s season just being overlooked in promos and in general. I get that it was the first season and the show gathered more attention around the second season but come on. Eva and her storyline is so important, the acting was so good and it laid a solid foundation for the rest of the show. I just feel like Eva’s character didn’t get the justice it deserved.

Favourite characters:

Vilde. Now my people let me tell you a little bit about Vilde. Vilde was the most important character in the entire show. She was the glue that brought together all the other characters. And she was so devoted to everthing she did: her friends, the bus, all the small gatherings. And i feel like everyone went to school with a person like this. Who was maybe teased and looked at like weird, but in hindsight you realise how much they really did for their community. In the last season we get a little peak into the life Vilde is living when she’s not at school and it’s absolutely heartbreaking. And again unpopular opinion but i liked that we never got a Vilde season, cus thats the reality of it. Most situations like these are hidden, and they are hidden so well. And not giving Vilde a season really enhances that. Vilde really just wanted to be good for the world and for the world to be a better place. And that scene from season 4 between Vilde, Chris and Magnus is honestly one of the most beautiful scenes of the entire show and both Vilde and Chris’ friendship and Vilde and Magnus’ relationship is so healthy and lovely. I love Vilde fight me.

Eskil. He is, without any doubt to ever excist about it, the funniest character on the show. He really gives me «Will and Grace»-vibes. But I also love that even though he is funny, he is not reduced to just funny lines. He is an example of how important one person can be to anothers life. He really did take care of the people around him, even though not everyone perceived his behaviour that way. He took care of Noora and brought her out of her shell. He took care of Isak and helped him come to terms with his sexuality and internalized homophobia. He took care of Linn and accepted her as she was while simultanously helping her be a part of their social community. He was also an very important counterpart to Isak’s character in season three. It gave out the message that there is definitely not one way to be gay. Although he wasn’t the best roomate, he was a good character.

Isak. My most favourite thing about his character is that i don’t 100% like him. It’s like having a friend that doesn’t agree with you on every single subject and i honestly feel like that enriches the relationship. And he is such a realistic norwegian boy, so many of my guy friends act similar to him. Guys and their feelings are very under-represented in the media, and i think as much as the third season is praised for its focus on lgbt+ and mental health, it should get some credit for putting guys and the way they face issues in the limelight. I love that he’s such a snake sometimes, because people do dumb, selfish shit no matter how much of a nice person you think they are. His friendship with Eva? Amazing. And also veey realistic. Sometimes friends grow a little apart before they come back together, and i think their friendship is a strong one. His friendship with Jonas? Amazing. That coming out scene at the bench says it all i need not write any further. His friendship with Sana? Amazing. Isak was such an important character in her season and she was so important in his. The talk they have at the bench in Sana’s season is such a nice scene. Also Tarjei, the actor who plays Isak, is one of norway’s finest. He’s so good, i’ve seen him in other things as well and he’s just astonishing. The «O Helga Natt» scene is good, but it wouldn’t be nearly as good without that amazing acting.

That concludes my personal analysis of OG SKAM that no one asked for, but if you wanna tag along make sure to look out for my next! And hopefully i will get to sleep now.

[isa-ghost]

Marvin Theory (ft. A Bit of Chase)

So I was taking notes on LoF2 Parts 1 & 2 and,,, my Theory Brain had a stroke. Hear me out--

We already knew Chase took over and posed as Jack while he was comatose. What if after Dark Silence, something happened to him (still seriously convinced its corruption personally) and now Marvin is posing as Chase posing as Jack? Think about it! (This one might be far-fetched considering Marv wasn’t immediately named Marv and wasn’t originally meant to be an ego bUT-) Marvin’s already been “Jack the Magnificent,” taking on the name Jack isn’t very hard for him. And if he’s a good actor- as we commonly associate with him being a magician + the actor theme of LoF2 so far, he’d presumably slip “into character” as Chase no problem. Also consider what Sean said at PAX(?) last year. He’d least want to live with Chase, because “he never stops talking about/moping about his family.” If Marvin is friends with Chase like we know Chase is friends with Henrik/Jack, then Marvin wouldn’t have to dig too deep to find a way to seem like Chase. Not to mention, if what happened in the Discord was a legit conversation between the 5 boys, then they all know each other somehow, and presumably are all friends or are at least acquainted. I also saw someone mention in the first upload today (the Sonic game, 5/29/19), whoever it is we’re seeing is making older channel jokes. I was iffy on the idea, but then I realized in Part 1 of LoF2, he made a “glankles” joke when he hasn’t played Subnautica: Below Zero in weeks. Yeah, its a running joke and all that, but it still struck me as out of place after the game the joke originated from hasn’t been played in a while and Sean hasn’t made the joke in any other video, especially not recently... As the person who first brought up this idea said, it’d make sense that Marvin is a little out of the loop due to his absence on the channel, it’s not impossible that he’d not be perfectly up to date on channel memes.

Also, not completely part of this theory, but I like to think we haven’t seen Marvin in the flesh for sure in almost 3 years because he’s been aggressively practicing magic given that he wasn’t great at it in his Power Hour. Sean does love the magic headcanons we make, and all the art of him using magic... Plus do recall that he once said a thing about Marvin being able to zap someone into a mirror dimension or smth like that. Even if it was just a joke or he doesn’t remember saying it, I distinctly remember all of us collectively losing our shit over the possible confirmation that Marvin is canonically magically powerful. Given all the crazy shit that’s happened storyline-wise, and Anti’s bitch ass destroying everything for the last 3 years? It’d make sense Marv would be training himself like crazy in magic to prepare himself to beat Anti’s ass (good guy or morally gray, he definitely ain’t here for Anti’s bullshit).

So...

Is it Marvin we’re seeing? Is it Chase? Is it Marvin posing as Chase? Is it none of these three? I dunno, but I’m overwhelmed by the amount of reasonable support I thought of for the idea...

So uh... Happy Marvin Appreciation Week? I guess my contribution (aside from some art I have planned) is a theory?

[victoroflegacies]

Hope Andrea Mikaelson, district 4.

❝𝐒𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚 𝐤𝐢𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐝𝐢𝐞.❞

The bright-eyed red-headed child was born into a line of winners in the games. Her grandfather, aunt, father all won their games but sadly her Uncle Henrik died during his but he did make it be one of the last five. Henrik was only twelve when he was called and while it is a career district, everyone knows better than to cross Mikael into volunteering when one of his children were called. When Henrik died, it broke the family and no one really wanted to have any more children to end up going to the games. 

Hope hasn't been planned in fact her mother had a one night stand with her father that turned into an unplanned pregnancy. With medical care slim, everything is fuzzy even in district four the idea of abortion wasn’t there even if both Hayley Marshall and Klaus Mikaelson hadn’t been wanting to produce a child that would no doubt be forced into the games either by Mikael himself or by the Capitol calling her name. Hope was loved even if at first she hadn’t exactly been wanted.

Her mother and father worked hard to make sure that she had everything in the world. From the moment Hope was born, she was special in more than one way. Hope was almost like the glue that brought her family back together again. Her aunts would spoil her with fine gifts, her uncles would show her how to know what is poison and what wasn’t while her father taught Hope to fight. Hope was a natural throwing knives and poison. Hope was and still is tiny so while she can get in several great punches, her chances on winning with just her strength were slim. Everyone knew Hope was a natural at fighting, had the brains to think several steps ahead but no one was sure that she had the heart to kill. 

Hope grew up nursing wounded birds back to health. she was too connected with the earth and one could argue too innocent but she shocked everyone when she is the one that comes home with blood on her hands and a kill count that is eight out of twenty-four. Someone stabs the wild Mikaelson in the leg, nerve damage and dead muscle that had been eaten away thanks to infection, her left leg now feels nothing but pain that is all in her head as the Capitol “fixed” her leg so that she feels nothing.

Seventeen years old when she wins, eighteen years old when she cries herself to sleep at night and swears that she never wants children because nothing is worse than the fate of being a murderer. 

★彡 𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐥𝐚𝐦𝐛. 𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐞𝐫 ❰verse district 4❱

This is her canon verse for the Hunger Games series. No involvement with Katniss or her storyline. I do have a verse where Hope is Prim’s friend that I will write out but that isn’t canon for her.

While this blog is set for a version of Hope that is wrapped up in the Hunger Games, I will still take some more canon Legacies interactions on this blog but generally, anything like that goes to naturesloopholed.

Want to bring Hope her canon friends from Legacies? Go for it! I support this so much that I would love the idea

[hollenka99]

A Talk With The Creator

Summary: ‘Birthday cards crowd the table next to the bed. He's 29 today. If Jack is aware of this in any way is a mystery. It's the second birthday he's missing now.’

Disclaimer: I wrote this for Sean’s birthday last month. Just to write something to acknowledge it, you know? So this is what came out. But then, I got a couple comments on AO3. They lead to me creating my Creator AU and The Friend. This one shot is no longer canon in its current form. Maybe once I post Jameson’s POV, I might rewrite this so it fits better.

I was in two minds about crossposting this on here but after posting The Friend (which, by the way, thank you for all the responses. A couple nights ago I was literally sitting here tearing up because you were all being so nice to me. My stories rarely get attention so you have no idea how happy it made me.) I thought it would be best to show where the basis for the AU came from.

Henrik checked on Jack's monitors. His vitals were stable and everything was fine with him. Except, of course, for the fact he was still in a coma.

It had been a year and a half now. 18 whole months since he'd barely saved his friend from death. Jack did in fact die for a brief period. Not that Henrik wants to dwell on that. It was all Sean's fault. He had true control over all of them. If he so desired, he could set Anti on them without any warning. They could have an average Monday, only for the rest of their week be thrown into chaos. Jackie had been subject to Anti's mercy, shortly joined by Schneeplestein. They were both free now, thank God, but it was only a matter of time before Sean got creative again. At times like that, it is difficult to remember his friend is a good person at heart.

Birthday cards crowd the table next to the bed. He's 29 today. If Jack is aware of this in any way is a mystery. It's the second birthday he's missing now. Two years ago, they'd all cheered as Jack and Sean blew out the candles together on the cake they shared. A lot had happened since last February. Fortunately, 2018 had been relatively quiet for them, if you excluded May. But Sean had been very busy during the past year, be it touring or focusing on mental health. None this would bring Jack back to them.

Defeated, he places his hand gently on Jack's shoulder. "Happy birthday, mein freund. I wish we could be celebrating together."

"We need to talk to Sean." Henrik scowled as he entered the living room. "This has gone on too long." "Leave it until tomorrow. It's his birthday too." Marvin sighed. "No, Schneep's right. It's been a year and a half now. I don't know how much longer I can do this." Chase had improved hiding hints of his insecurities. All that improvement was going to waste as his face crumbled in despair.

They make up their minds. As soon as possible, the five of them would negotiate with their creator to return Jack to their friendship group. It didn't matter that Sean struggled to see them as more than characters brought to life. Jack was different to them in that he was essentially Sean's own self but living with energy levels exceeding 100%. They could use that to their advantage.

"Hi, Sean." Jackie greets. "Hey guys, nice to see you." He was a little dumbfounded to see five of his ego characters standing outside his home. Nevertheless, he smiles politely at them. "Want to come in? I got myself cake. Bit sad, I know. But today's a great excuse to eat as much cake as I want. I don't really have much to do until tonight except for reblogging stuff on social media. It would be pretty cool if you had a slice too." "Sean, we need to discuss a few things." The doctor didn't seem to pleased with him. "Which we can do over cake." Marvin interjected.

The group gathers somewhat civilly in Sean's living room. The cake slices are served but remain untouched. The egos look between each other. Who would bring their demands up first? Things take an unexpected turn when Chase notices an open notebook laying on the dining table.

"Wait, are these your plans for us?" The vlogger reaches for the notebook. In a panic, Sean takes it from him. "I'm sorry but it's best if you don't look. Uh, it's not good to know your future and all that. Besides, I'm still working stuff out." "Like what? How many times should we expect Anti to appear?" "Jackie, shut up." Marvin scolded. "Well?!" Chase didn't intend that outburst. "Look guys, calm down would you? Jesus. I haven't finished my plans so anything could change. Plus, I haven't put paint on my neck since... uh..." "August 2017. When you put Jack in a coma." Henrik answered for him. "Yeah, since Kill Jacksepticeye. Right now, I just stare at the camera and twitch my eye. I've told you before, it was a spur of the moment thing. I was sick and tired of YouTube messing about with ad revenue and the shitty algorithm. Plus, Mark was making Darkiplier vs Antisepticeye so it was the best time to do Anti stuff. And that's why I put Jack away for a while. I regret it now. Don't act like I don't miss him too. One thing's for sure, this next 'phase' will definitely see him wake up. I can tell you that. So please don't be mad at me." Jameson ripped a page from the small notebook, passing a written message to Sean. "Am I happier now? Yeah, totally. Last year was a blast. I really turned stuff around, you know that." "So are you happy enough to wake Jack up on his birthday?"

Sean hesitates. In terms of the storyline, Jack won't wake up until later in the year. But screw it, he's not a dick. He neglected Jack last February and saw how miserable they were as a result. He promises the five of them he'll give them all a break for today. That said, he's far from omnipotent. Keeping Jack awake will likely be draining. When he falls asleep, so will his alter ego. One last time, he assures them they'll get Jack back for good in a few months. He just needs to finalise his plans first.

When they return home, the sirens are blaring. Jackie had installed them long ago to give them warning in case of an attack. They'd since been modified to additionally alert Henrik if Jack was in need of assistance. As soon as the doctor heard the shrieking, he sprints through the halls to the ward.

And there he is, maintaining consciousness faster than any coma patient he's known. He's been reading their birthday cards. Jack's bewilderment is entirely expected. Henrik opens his mouth to say something, anything comforting will suffice really. Before the words come, his friend lifts his head to make eye contact.

"I guess I'm not 27 anymore, am I."

[stevethehairington]

My thanks and appreciation and love to everyone who was apart of Skam...

I can’t believe that today is the last day of Skam. It feels like just yesterday I was logging onto Tumblr and seeing my feed full of countless gifs of the two precious boys who would come to change my life (and take it over!) making out spiderman style and sharing smokes with each other. I remember reblogging one of those gifs and thinking to myself “they look so cute together and they look so gone for each other, what is this show?” and thus, my downward spiral (really it was totally positive though!!) into the abyss that is called Skam began. I remember figuring out that those gifs were from season 3 and that they were already on the fifth episode of it and I went back and watched all of season 3, found season 1 and 2 and watched those, and then watched season 3 again until I was caught up. I think I’ve watched season 3 about 10 times by now and I’ve seen seasons 1 and 2 several times more as well! That’s how much I love this show, I can rewatch it so many times and still never get sick of it! I really can’t believe that we’ve reached the end- it feels so surreal. I’m so grateful for everything Skam has done for me. It has taught me so many things about some many different topics, I’ve made some great friends because of it, I’ve gotten to learn a new language and appreciate different cultures, I have so many new mottos to live by now as well. God, this show was just so good. It was so real, which is way different from most of the shows I watch. As an American, our television shows love drama and love to drop bombs for “shock value” and they love to use actors who are like 27 to portray someone who’s supposed to be 17, so the fact that Skam had actors that were really 17 playing 17 year olds and that all of the conflicts were realistic and weren’t just there to create more drama but actually had a purpose was so so refreshing and it just drew me in even more. I have loved every second of Skam and deciding to check this show out was probably the best decision of my life. This show, these actors, Julie- all of it has changed my life for the better and I know I’m never going to find something as amazing as this. I will forever cherish this show and everything it has done for me.

To Julie, thank you from the bottom of my heart for everything you have done for this show. You’ve created so many amazing characters that all represent something different and are all so genuine which allows us to see ourselves in them- they’re not perfect, they make mistakes, but they learn from those mistakes and the lessons these characters have taught us are lessons I will never ever forget. You also managed to give so much representation for so many different groups- religion, sexuality, mental illness, gender, race, abuse victims, and so many others that I have not seen before, and that in itself is truly amazing. You chose the perfect actors to be apart of your creation as well, every single one of them seems so down to earth and so genuinely good, and they are all immensely talented and work so well together. The storylines, as well, are masterpieces. Every single problem these characters faced were real problems that people face all over the world and every person that watched this show could identify with at least one of these problems. I especially enjoyed how everything was relevant and how you used parallels and symbolism so so well. This show has not only taught me so much and helped me become more aware of things, but it brought me closer to so many people around the world. I’ve made so many new friends through this show and for that I am forever grateful. Not to mention, this show has sparked an interest of languages in me, and I even started learning Norwegian! It’s such a beautiful language! You are an incredibly talented human being and I have never been more happy to have found this show. I stumbled upon a true gem when I found this one ❤

To Tarjei, god where do I even start? I started watching this show about halfway through Isak’ s season and I knew from the second I started watching that I would absolutely fall in love with you. I was totally right. I was captivated from the start. You are such an amazing actor, I literally cannot put into words how talented I think you are. Your ability to do so much and portray so many different emotions with your facial expressions and just the tiny details of each expression, it blows my mind. You’re only eleven days older than me and you’ve got more talent that I could ever imagine having. I know you’re going to go on to do the most amazing things- who are we kidding, you’ve already gone and landed yourself some wonderful roles (Grease!! My favorite musical!! I’m so excited for you!!) that I know you’ll beyond succeed in! I’ve really enjoyed watching you grow both as a person and as an actor (and as Isak, especially as Isak, that character development is wow, too good!). Throughout the years you’ve only gotten more talented and more amazing, and I am so glad that I was able to be here to witness that! You put so much passion into everything you do and I could totally see that with Isak. The way you played him was phenomenal and the way you handled his struggles and the ways he dealt with things (or didn’t) was so well done. Once again, I am at a loss for words for how insanely proud I am of you, Tarjei. I love you with all my being. Never stop being you. ❤ 

To Henrik, you wonderful, bright star of a human being. I’ve only “known” you since November but it feels like it’s been years. You are single handedly one of the absolute most talented people I have ever had the honor and pleasure of watching. In one of your interviews at the Skam party you said that you didn’t want to make Even a stereotypical character and that you wanted to portray mental illness in a respectful, believable way and can I just say you were beyond successful in this. Anyone that ever has to play someone with a mental illness should absolutely take notes from you! You did Even so much justice and you made him so believable and genuine and you were so very respectful about it all. Mental illnesses are not easy, and you definitely portrayed that. Your portrayal of Even taught me so so much about mental illnesses and I will forever be grateful for that. I know that you resonated with so many people through this role and you should be incredibly proud of yourself. You definitely made history with Even seeing as he not only represented living with bipolar, but also identifying as pansexual, something I don’t think I’ve ever seen before. You are a role model for so many people, myself included, and I’m so glad that Julie picked up that phone and called you. I’m still so upset that we didn’t get to see more of Even and learn more about his story and his background and explore all of his complex layers- he had such an amazing story to tell and so so much potential. Part of the reason why he had so much potential, I think, is because of you Henrik. You breathed so much life into that character and I could tell how passionate you were about that role. Every single time you came on screen I was just so captivated with how much effort you put into Even. I’m truly impressed and so so proud, I can’t even properly express it all. I’m not ready to let go of Even, that’s for sure! I’ll miss him so so much, but I know he will always live on in my heart and mind, and I know he will in yours as well. (And hey, I know a ton of people, myself included, would totally be 100% on board with and in support of you just making Even his own season- I bet you could get some of the other cast to get on board as well, if they’re not already) I know you’re going to do great things, whatever projects you have next are so lucky to have you and I can’t wait to hear all about them. Not only are you incredibly genuine when you play Even, but you’re also so genuine in real life as well. You seem like you’re the nicest human being ever and I am so glad that I had the opportunity to exist in the same lifetime as you. You’re insanely talented and charming and so down to earth and sweet, I’m sure this won’t be the last we see of you! I love you with all my heart, Henrik! ❤❤

To Iman, I’m so incredibly proud of you for everything you have done in Skam. You are a truly wonderful person and an amazing actress. To hear that you’ll be joining the army- I am incredibly proud of you, and Norway is incredibly lucky, their army is gaining such a strong, wonderful woman. Your portrayal of Sana has been amazing, you brought her to life, embodied her sass and her strength and gave her your everything. I learned so much from both Sana and you about so many different things- about Islam and religion, about friendship, about being selfless and always looking out for those you love. Sana was such a loyal character and I admire that so very much. She always stood up for her friends and defended them and would go to the ends of the earth for them. Her heart is so big and so golden and I love her so so much. Her friendship with Isak was one of my favorite things to watch, their banter was lovely and they were so pure. I wish we could’ve seen more of Sana and Even interacting, I feel like they would have been amazing friends. Your portrayal of Sana was a gift to us all, and Sana’s nickname may be Sanasol, but Iman, you really are the sun here, shining so very bright and leaving us all in awe. You are a beautiful soul, inside and out and I’m going to miss you and Sana so very much. ❤

To Ulrikke, you. are. absolutely. stunning. You have a heart of pure gold and I admire you in every single way possible. You are such an empowering, strong, beautiful woman and I consider you to be one of my role models. Every time I see you post something on Instagram, I always smile because I know that whatever it is you posted is going to inspire so many people, girls and boys, young and old, everyone. Your portrayal of Vilde was amazing. Vilde was such a complex character and she struggled with so much, and I’m so disappointed that we didn’t get to see her have her own season- I know she deserved it- but what we did get to see of her was so so wonderful, and that’s all because of you and your incredible talent. Vilde could definitely be problematic, but you couldn’t help but love her. Despite her ignorance’s, she really did mean well and she seemed like a lovely person to have in your life and a great friend. You really brought her to life and I’m so glad I got to be here for this! I cannot wait to see what you do next- whatever it is I know you’ll do such an amazing job at it! ❤

To Lisa, the amazing, beautiful girl who started it all. Our very first ever main character of Skam! When I discovered this show and then went back to watch season 1, I fell in love with it in an instant. I loved everything about Eva’s season and I think it was a brilliant start to a brilliant show. Eva is one of my favorite characters on the show, I absolutely love her. At first, she was very shy and insecure, but as time progressed you could see her coming out of her shell and really finding out who she was and I think you managed to capture all of this so well. You can truly see the difference in her, can see her character development and her growth and that’s so impressive! Eva is so fun-loving and sweet and I absolutely adore her. I loved her friendship with Isak and I’m so happy that Jonas and Eva were endgame because I love them together. You are such an amazing actress and I’m so glad you got cast in this show! I’m going to miss you and Eva so so much but I know both will go on to do wonderful things! I love you! ❤

To Ina, what a fun-loving, big-hearted, beautiful spirit! It is truly a travesty that we didn’t get to see more of Chris, I loved her so much. She was always so funny and always put a smile on my face every time I saw her. Chris was such an underrated character and she totally is one of my favorites! You did such a good job as Chris, I love everything about her and everything about how you portrayed her. My absolute favorite Chris clip was the solo one she got in the last week of Skam. We got to see a different side of her, and it really made me feel for her. Her insecurity about her friendships, the “am I good enough?” feeling is so relatable. Her talk with Dr. Skrulle and the smile that she gets at the end and then how she goes out and sends everybody such sweet messages, I fell in love with her all over again! Chris Berg is the purest soul! She is really an amazing friend and I would love to have her as one of my friends! You really did a wonderful job playing Chris, Ina! I’m going to miss the both of you immensely! And of course, you will do such amazing things in your future! I love you! ❤

To Josefine, Noora is one of the first characters I fell in love with! I absolutely loved her strong, independent vibe in season 1. She was such an empowering character, and she stands up for such amazing things, and has such solid, good beliefs. I wasn’t the biggest fan of her relationship with William, but I knew that Noora’s a strong girl and would be able to take care of herself, something she proved time and time again. Not only is she strong, but she is also one hell of a friend. She stands up for her friends, she helps her friends through tough times, she’s loyal. Josefine, you portrayed Noora so fantastically, there is no one who could have done it better. Listening to your voice is always fun, I think your voice is just so nice to listen to. You always seem to have a smile on your face as well, which I love. Also, you’re absolutely stunning in every way possible. You made watching Noora so enjoyable and I’m going to miss you as Noora! You’re going to do wonderful things in the future and whatever project you work on next is going to be so lucky to have you! I love you, Josefine! ❤

To Marlon, the eyebrow king of the world. Okay, I actually love you so much it’s crazy. Both you and Jonas are so likeable and I just want to be both of your best friends! From the first episode in season 1 I fell in love with Jonas. He’s such a strong character, so opinionated (in the good way!) and wise, and just so genuinely cool, like, god I really do just want to be his best friend. I love how season 1 opened with Jonas’s anti-capitalism speech and I love how season 4 ends with Jonas giving a speech again, it really feels full circle. Marlon, your acting as Jonas was spectacular and I enjoyed every second of it! Jonas was such a loyal friend and when he loves someone, you can really see it and you managed to capture all of that so so well! I especially enjoyed the wide mouthed laugh thing you do in the episode where Isak texts Even to figure his shit out after Isak announces that Even is at his door is my actual favorite thing ever, it’s absolutely precious, and your little “ahh” in the first episode of season 4 is also just great. I wish we would’ve seen more Jonas in season 4, he’s such a great character- I wish he would have had his own season as well, I think that would have been so cool to get to see things through Jonas’s perspective! But Jonas is such a good friend to Isak, so supportive and chill and the scene where Isak comes out to Jonas is by far one of my favorite Jonas scenes. You are truly such a talented guy and you seem like such a cool dude as well. Like I said before, I would love to have you as a best friend, Marlon! I especially enjoy how you would draw stick figure Isak and Even in the places of your home that they used during filming and I also loved the lowkey shade you would throw about your character and whatnot with all of the Instagram posts you liked. Thank you for everything you’ve done with Jonas, he was one of my favorites! I’m sad to see Jonas go, but I know this won’t be the last we see of Marlon! I can’t wait to see what adventures you go on next! Marlon Langeland, I love you so much! ❤

To David, oh my god I love you I love you I love you! Magnus was one of my absolute favorites! He was insanely funny and boy squad always gave him so much shit and teased him a ton (all of it lovingly of course!). He definitely had some moments where I would facepalm and be like oh my god Magnus why? but he always came back from those and he always meant well! I wish we got to see even more Magnus he was a true gem and such a pure soul (despite his dirty mind and desperate need to get laid haha). You truly brought Magnus to life, David, and I am so happy that you were the one to play him! You hit the nail on the head and portrayed his slightly cluelessness and desperation perfectly. He may have been somewhat ignorant at times, but hey he learned from his mistakes and like I said before, he totally meant well! David, I just want to give you the biggest hug, especially after watching Magnus hug Even so many times- those hugs always looked so good and cozy! Magnus’s obsession with Even is actually the purest thing in the world and I adore it so much. He definitely looks up to Even and the way he treats Even just makes me love him that much more. I really really loved the scene where Magnus talks to Isak about Even and bipolar disorder and shares about his experience with it via his mom. That scene showed a different side to Magnus and made me fall in love with him even more because he really loves everyone with his whole heart and sees the good in everyone. David, you are truly talented and I can’t wait to see what’s next in store for you! I think one of my favorite things about you is your laugh as well. It’s so bright and it never fails to make me smile and laugh right along. I feel like you would be such an amazing friend, you seem like the nicest soul ever! I love you with all my heart! ❤

To Sacha, you are a gift to us all! I’m really sad that we don’t get to see much of Mahdi onscreen and that he doesn’t have more speaking lines, but what we do see of him he is truly wonderful! He seems like a solid friend, always seems to have good advice, is totally loyal, incredibly pure, has amazing values, and his love for waffles rivals Leslie Knope’s! The advice Mahdi gives Isak is wonderful, and I really liked how open-minded Mahdi is. In the scene where Isak comes out to Magnus and Mahdi, I love everything about Mahdi in it. He isn’t holding a grudge towards Isak about Isak shoving him, he’s completely chill about it. He gets offended when Magnus thinks it’s funny that people thought he and Isak fought because he’s homophobic (which he makes very clear is not the case!). He suggests that maybe Isak and Even are pansexual. Everything about that scene, I love. You portrayed Mahdi as such a ball of sunshine and as such a great friend and I love everything about him! You’re incredibly talented and I hope to see more of you in the future! I love you! ❤

To Carl, the one and only guru angel. Carl, Eskild was such a fun character because of you! Everything about Eskild, I loved. He was so supportive and so sweet and so energetic and uplifitng and funny and just an all around angel. He was very much like a father figure to Isak and every time I think about how he found Isak all alone, drunk off his ass at some gay bar and how he decided to help him and take him in and all of the support he’s given Isak and how he’s constantly there and in Isak’s corner ready to give him advice or make him smile again, gah it just makes me so emotional! Eskild is a gift to this world and so are you Carl! Your portrayal of Eskild was absolutely amazing! You really brought him to life and made him fun and vivacious and loveable! His numerous nicknames for Isak, his constant support for everyone close to him, his perky personality, all of it was so wonderful because of you! There are so many favorite Eskild moments I have, but I especially enjoyed the speech Eskild gives Isak when he makes the ignorant comment and puts himself above gay pride- you did an amazing job with that scene, the emotion you have while giving that little speech is so raw and it’s so moving. Another one of my all time favorites is the Eskild and Linn clip from season 4 that we just got! That scene legitimately made me cry. Eskild is such a good person and such a great friend and he loves with his whole heart. To see him reassure Linn that they will always have each other made me so emotional. Carl, you are so talented and I cannot thank you enough for your portrayal of Eskild. I love you and I can’t wait to see what you will do next! ❤

To Rakel, a beautiful warrior-princess. You did an absolutely outstanding job at playing Linn. I wish Linn had more screen time, I would have loved to see more of her, especially more of an interaction between her and Even. I feel like they would have gotten along swimmingly and would have been fast friends. Even could have even helped Linn out with her depression maybe, and they could have talked about a lot of deep stuff together. Linn was totally relatable in some ways and I really liked her. You’re incredibly talented and absolutely beautiful inside and out! I can’t wait to see what you’ll do next, I’m sure it will be wonderful! I love you Rakel!❤

To Cengiz, to Yousef, to Simo, to Adam, to Mutta, the balloon boys, the sweetest, purest souls. All of you were so amazing in your respective roles! I wish we would have been able to see more of you guys, and I definitely wish we could have learned more about the balloon boys’s relationship with Even and both how it fell apart as well as how it was repaired. All of you boys seem like such lovely people and are all insanely talented. Cengiz- you were a wonderful Yousef, he was so sweet and such a down-to-earth cutie pie, I loved him with all my heart, just like I love you! Yousef- Mikael was such a sweetheart and I always loved seeing your smile onscreen, it’s absolutely precious! I wish Mikael had a bigger role in this, he seemed like such an interesting character! Simo- Elias Bakkoush was the best big brother in the world. He was so protective of his sister, but in such a good way. Him saying that Yousef would be good for Sana was so sweet and the fact that he genuinely was disappointed when the other boys said Yousef was with Noora. I would’ve loved to see more of him as well! Adam- I would have loved to see more of you and hear you more as well! Adam seemed so fun! Mutta- The same goes for you, it would have been lovely to have you in the show more! ❤

To Herman, to Thomas, you both did amazing in this show! Herman, your portrayal of Perpetrator Chris was funny and you did a really good job at playing a fuck boy, haha. Minus his fuck boy attitude and his playboy “I can do whatever and whoever I want” mentality and his cheating tenancies, I think Chris was a good person, or at least he seemed to be shaping up to be a decent person towards the end. Thomas, I didn’t really like William at all, but you did a really good job with his character. You got the fuck boy attitude down as well, and the onscreen time between William and Noora was sweet at certain times. ❤

To Theresa, to Cecilie, to Kristina, to Ruby, you all had the more “villainous” roles, but in reality you all seem like absolutely sweethearts! You all played your roles exceptionally well and I give you all the kudos for that, those roles always seem hard. I can’t wait to see what each of you will do, I know it’ll all be great! You all are so talented and will go far in life! ❤

To whoever was in charge of picking the music, I just want to give you the biggest kudos in the entire universe. The music of Skam was so so amazing, especially in season 3. God, season 3′s music was the best. Every single song fit the moment perfectly and I will truly never get over that! I’ve found so many new songs and artists because of this show and for that I will forever be grateful! Music is such a big part of my life and getting the opportunity to discover new sounds made me so happy! ❤

To all of the friends I’ve made through Skam, I love you all so so much and I am so glad that we were brought together! It’s been amazing to get to know you guys and I only wish that we don’t stop talking because the show is over! ❤

To all of the incredible fic writers and fanart creators… @shadeandadidas @westiris @bechnaesun @noenoaholi @dahlstrom @isisisak @jydoodles @isaksredscarf @danielhowell @elli-skam @miranhas-art @ravenclawisak @stardefiant @leoniejulie (I know there are many more so if I didn’t tag, don’t worry, it’s just because I’m drawing a blank because there are so many!)… you guys are absolutely amazing! I appreciate all of the time and effort you take to create these masterpieces, these incredible works of art. You all have so much talent and I hope that you all will stick around and keep writing/drawing for this amazing fandom! ❤

Skam, it has been a real pleasure. 😚👏✌

Tusen takk og jeg elsker deg i alle universer! ❤❤❤

[andrewuttaro]

New Look Sabres: GM 19 - OTT - Jack It!

4-2 Regulation Win over Sens

The term “Must-Win” is a bit overused in our contemporary sports parlay. That phrase is placed before everything from pretty standard out-of-conference matchup to run-of-the-mill divisional games. Some games are must-win because if you don’t win em then there will be a new level of hell to pay. Last night was a must-win for the Buffalo Sabres. Rightfully. A loss against the Ottawa Senators would not just have been embarrassing from a skill versus skill perspective, it would have been a seventh loss in a row and trigger more than a couple alarm bells. Luckily it was a win, and a reasonably dominating one too. Still there are some storylines in this game that have been festering and will probably be with us for the weeks and months to come. Before that though let’s talk about Greatest Game Against! Brought to you by the 50th Anniversary Season of the Buffalo Sabres the Greatest Game Against attempts to memorialize the best game against each of Buffalo’s divisional rivals. There is history, and plenty of it, between these two clubs! However the greatest game against the Ottawa Senators is such in a walk, it’s not even close. The Greatest Game Against the Sens was May 13th, 2006. The Buffalo Sabres, a team that surprised many being so good so quickly after the lockout finds themselves in the second round of the playoffs against a team they had encountered many times before. The Senators were no laughing matter sporting the good, young versions of Dany Heatley, Daniel Alfredsson and Jason Spezza, not to mention they had won the Northeast division that season. The Lindy Ruff Sabres had Daniel Briere and Chris Drury backed up by almost peak Ryan Miller with the likes of career-year having Maxim Afinogenov, Jochen Hecht, Jay McKee, and Mike Grier shepherding young guns like Jason Pominville and Tomas Vanek. After a killer first four games of the series Buffalo had the divisional winners on the edge of elimination in their own house. It was a back-and-forth affair: Buffalo’s Henrik Tallinder scores in the first minute before the Sens Alfredsson scored at the midway mark of the first. The Sabres took the lead again in the second period via a Chris Drury powerplay goal only to be equalized again by Brian Pothier. The game went to overtime when the most memorable goal of Jason Pominville’s career for most Sabres fans occurred: Pommer gets the puck in the neutral zone and streams in along the boards crossing in front of Ray Emery in the Sens net. He outmaneuvers Emery putting it in behind for the sudden win. That eliminated the divisional champs and sent the Sabres to a fateful Eastern Conference Final against the eventual Stanley Cup Champion Carolina Hurricanes. A young Elliotte Friedman interviewed Pominville after the hand-shakes who was sobered by the reminder he started that season on waivers. Ryan Miller also had a gem of a post-game interview but its due time we talk about last night’s win over the Sens.

There’s no getting around the fact that the Sabres dominated the first period last night, they dominated every statistical category and the eye-test for you grumpy old men. However, they did not score and for a team in a must-win situation it was an uneasy first intermission. If you were looking for rays of light in what has been an ugly November so far the domineering start might harken back to…uh… last month when these guys pretty reliably jumped out to hot starts regardless of where it went after that. If you’re looking for rainclouds, like a lot of us seem to be doing these days, Jake McCabe and a very much not optimized defensive group shored up their numbers as one of the league’s top 20 dump-in defenses. I am particularly annoyed with the dump-in-chase style because its always statistically detrimental to your momentum in a games and normally signifies a team that does not know what they’re doing as a whole group. This season started with a quick-passing play-together kind of chemistry and I’m wondering where it went. I pray to God it didn’t freeze off with the first snowfall of the season.

Kyle Okposo took a weird hit coming on off the bench and he would leave the game early in the second period. Last time I checked the jury isn’t out on what’s going on there. We didn’t have a lot of time to think about it. Rasmus Dahlin got the puck to Jack Eichel skating along the boards hounded by Dylan DeMelo. Like so many times in his career we saw Jack quick-release a slapper that zipped past Craig Anderson, 1-0 Sabres. After what would turn out to be one of the Captain’s hottest nights, he would be asked by the Athletic’s Joe Yerdon what got him shooting so much more. The answer was something out of some demented Sabres fan fiction from 2015. Eichel said he got a text recently from an old friend named… wait for it… MATT MOULSON telling him he outta shoot more. Hmm. I’ll just let that one percolate in your head. This game was full of ghosts of Christmases past when Anthony Duclair cashed in on a Sens powerplay to even it up about five minutes later. Ok, that’s more of a personal ghost of my past. Halfway through the period Buffalo struck back. This time it was Victor Olofsson carrying the puck into the offensive zone and dropping it off to a 1, 2, 3… quadruple covered Jack Eichel? No matter what Eichel just took the puck and whacked it on net. It went in and Jack’s brace put the Sabres back in the lead 2-1. As this game got into its second half some peculiar things started to unfold. For one, a frustrated Sabres fanbase continued to wonder where we can find Colin Miller in order to free him because the top defensive minutes were not in the most capable hands last night.

Secondly, Rasmus Dahlin got benched. So this saga has already had a full life cycle in the 18 prior games this season so I am not going to prognosticate about why or how except for two things: Ralph Krueger said after the game quote “[Dahlin] just sometimes wanting too much maybe and finding the balance between his amazing genius and skill and what we need to win. He’ll improve from it.” Chad DeDominicis pointed out that’s not ever really been asked of the guy this organization keeps reminding us is still a teenager. Dahlin has, at every step of his career, including when he switch from forward to defense *checks notes* five years ago, been allowed to be creative. Certainly mistakes will be made but as you keep reminding us Ralph: he’s 19. Maybe benching him is riskier than him messing up on the defensive side every now and again. Players like him are not a dime a dozen. The other part of this worth noting is immortalized in my twitter cover photo: Captain Eichel grabbing Dahlin on the bench and giving him some kind of talk. We’ll probably never know exactly what was said but I chose to imagine Eichel imploring the young franchise defenseman to not lose his confidence and not to think too much. Eichel remembers the Dan Blysma era. What became the grievance with Disco Dan was forcing a complicated programmatic game plan on creative players. Everyone was second guessing themselves in the months leading into that Coach’s firing. That same self-doubt inducing split-second confusion is clearly evident in Dahlin these days. Eichel saw it too and addressed it to Dahlin. I chose this as my reality because the best teams in this league transcend their head coaches: the Pittsburgh Penguins, the San Jose Sharks, the Boston Bruins, the Tampa Bay Lightning. The players on those teams are the mood-setters and the leaders. Could you even name the coach on 2 out 4 of those clubs without using google? I’m sure you could name the decisive players on all four of those clubs. I want that for my team and I like to think Captain Jack is doing it.

Captain Jack scored a hat trick for the second time in his career. The third one came in similar fashion to the first as he skated along the boards and ripped one through traffic past the opposing goaltender. The hat storm goal made it 3-2. The Sens had already evened it up before that with a real blast from the Sabres past Tyler Ennis. It was really a tip-in originating with Ron Hainsey but that will count for Ennis the Menace. Nonetheless Eichel had the game winner but he wasn’t done yet. As the third period ticked away and it became clear this would be the game to break the losing streak the Sens pulled Anderson and Eichel launched an intercontinental missile into the open net to reach the four-goal dick trick. Do I need to explain that? I’ve learned my readers are a hockey-literate bunch. Well for those of you who don’t know Joe Thorton was once asked what he’d do with four goals in a single game. He said in such a scenario he’d pull his dick out and stroke it. Well last night our Captain Jacked it and pulled off the dick trick! I guess I have to mark this postgame explicit now, don’t I? It was over. The Sabres won 4-2 in regulation to collect all two points and finally get a win in November, the month they strung together ten in last year.

As always I’d appreciate a like, share and if you really want to be nice a comment on this blog. I think there is a lot to talk about with this team right now, in spite of the win. Moreover, either tomorrow or Tuesday you’ll be seeing another Sabres post on Southtowntickets.com. In it we’ll be discussing the simply befuddling question: What’s wrong with the Buffalo Sabres? The something wrong here is probably complex then let’s finally trade a defenseman but that will come into it as well. The Reply Guy of the game goes to @CaptPantalones (Brandon Andrerson) whose son got a Jack Eichel stick in the pregame skate. That’s a special kind of memory I suspect he won’t ever forget having seen the Captain tap in three goals the same night. That’s even more heart-warming then the Wedding I went to during this game, but I promised I wouldn’t brag about that here. Tonight, after a must-win Bills game in Miami I might add, the Sabres will take on another team they probably should beat: the Chicago Blackhawks. I’m almost afraid to say that because the Hawks have had our number a few times in the years since their dynasty team fell into the gutter and United Center isn’t a friendly place for any visitor. You got to start stringing those wins together again before the trip down to Florida next week. They’ve got a couple soft targets before the Bruins later in the week to do it so let’s see if we get the fun Sabres back. Last night came with a little treat beyond the Eichel Dick Trick: the Toronto Maple Leafs got rocked 6-1 by the Pens. The Atlantic Division isn’t the straightforward hierarchy we thought it was going to be. Not yet at least. Let’s Go Buffalo!

Thanks for Reading.

P.S. I hope Dahlin comes back from his benching to deke the pants off Alex Nylander tonight!

[lonelier-version-of-you]

I have no words.

When I heard that the episode where Paula returned had been written by Lydia Marchant, I knew, immediately, to expect very good things. You all know how much I praise S22E44 of Holby, and the way it tied Henrik’s autism into his trauma - the heartbreaking way they addressed how his ostracisation and isolation, even undiagnosed, left him vulnerable as a child. The horrifically realistic comments from Reyhan suggesting it was Henrik’s own fault that his mother killed herself, because she “could never really bring herself to love him”. I came out of that episode in awe. Marchant had evidently done her research; she clearly knew the things people say about disabled kids, and just how high the abuse rates for disabled children are. It was a shining spark of careful writing in a storyline that was otherwise a sensationalist mess.

Marchant hasn’t done much TV writing, going by her IMDB, but I put my faith in her to write about disability issues again, after how good she was last time. Some part of me, however, worried that perhaps Holby S22E44 was just a fluke, and this episode could be a letdown.

I was wrong to worry. Lydia Marchant has done it again.

Tonight’s episode had me on the verge of tears so many times. The complexity and realism was amazing, yet heartbreaking.

The scene with Paula at the social services meeting wrecked me. The way that every little thing she said and did got turned back against her and treated as proof she was unfit to raise a child. The way the social workers talked about her “behaviours”. It was so hard to watch.

Rosie Jones was incredible in that scene. I cannot praise her acting highly enough. It made everything so much sadder, because you could feel Paula’s desperation.

And when Adi walked in and asked if there was any chance Paula’s baby could be born today... oh my fucking god. Again - I don’t even have the words. Paula did everything right, she did everything social services told her to, and they still refused to let her raise her own daughter. Just because she was struggling ten years ago. And she was struggling in the first place because she was a poor, disabled, abuse victim with no support bringing up her child. And all they did was take the kid away from her. And now she’s being robbed of the chance to be a mother all over again.

I wish I could say it wasn’t realistic.

Paula’s screams when she found out she wouldn’t be allowed to keep her baby were haunting.

The complexity of the writing in the interactions between Paula and Dylan was brilliant. The visible vs. invisible disability contrast - “you’ve had an easy life!” - Paula’s cerebral palsy in contrast to Dylan’s autism. The fact that Dylan can pass himself off as neurotypical but just “weird”, and Paula cannot. The fact that they’ve both faced abuse and discrimination and trauma anyway. The effects that all of this has on both of their lives.

(Something about tonight made me think back to S29E43. The scene where Brian, Dylan’s father, finds out his new girlfriend is pregnant. And his first thought is to ask how far gone she is, to make sure they’ve “still got options”. Because he doesn’t want to “risk” having another autistic child. He only changes his mind when he thinks it could actually be his second chance to have a “normal” kid.)

And then there’s the parallel of Paula’s first child going into care, while Dylan grew up in care himself.

There’s so many layers and so many differences and parallels in this storyline. It’s just brilliant. And William Beck and Rosie Jones both acted it so, so well.

The last scene with Paula in her flat, planning to run away, had me straight up crying. Fucking hell.

As heartbreaking as this storyline is, I can’t wait to see how it plays out, and I hope Casualty continue to handle it with the care and sensitivity that they have done so far.

So that’s all of that covered. As for Paige - as with last week, she’s still got a lot to learn as a doctor, but she does show a lot of compassion and that’s a very good start. I really do like her so far. The actress is still very charismatic.

The surrogate mother storyline provided an interesting contrast to Paula’s story. When the spoilers said the surrogate lady was 60, I was like “surely that’s impossible”, but then I looked it up and apparently there have been women who managed to get pregnant at that age through IVF! The more you know. See, watching medical dramas can actually be educational sometimes! XD

And I’d be lying if I said I didn’t tear up when the baby finally started crying.

It was also nice to finally see Rosa again. She basically disappeared for ages. I’ve missed her.

[lonelier-version-of-you]

Holby S23E05, or: Will The Real Sahira Shah Please Stand Up?

So phase 1 of the racist, sensationalist, exploitative sexual abuse storyline comes to an end, and with it, we said goodbye once again to Sahira Shah.

What a complete and utter waste of a return.

Why did they even bother bringing her back? This woman was Sahira in name, actress, and husband only. That’s it. They retconned away all her backstory - where she was once Henrik’s former mentee whom he had unrequited feelings for, and who eventually got fed up of his behaviour and left, telling him never to contact her again... now apparently she’s a childhood friend of Henrik’s, he’s super close to her family, and he was “like a big brother to her”.

To borrow a quote from Ange last week: Pull the other one, Holby, it’s got bells on it.

If they were going to re-write everything about Sahira and her relationship with Henrik, and even her personality, why didn’t they just bring in a new character? What was the point of having it be Sahira/having Henrik’s abuser be Sahira’s dad? Plus, bringing in a new white character would have avoided the grossly racist implications of Henrik’s abuser being a ~creepy Middle Eastern man~.

And once again, Sahira’s storyline ends up revolving around men. (Well, men and one teenage boy, but the point still stands.) Holby’s misogyny hasn’t changed a bit in 10 entire years.

Now, tonight’s episode wasn’t totally horrible for Sahira. She felt more in-character in her exit scenes than she has in the entire rest of this stint. I can genuinely believe that Sahira Shah - the Sahira I know and love, as someone who has watched old Holby - would take the fall to protect her son like this. And Laila Rouass really brought out the metaphorical big guns for her final performance. What a talented actress indeed.

But the story is just such a mess.

Speaking of talented actors in messy storylines, I won’t be surprised at all if Ali Hadji-Heshmati wins an Oscar in 20 years or so. He’s really, really good and I can see him being one of those former soap guest stars who makes it big.

After tonight’s episode especially, I also think Abs is really interesting as a character. Poor kid’s gonna have so much trauma to deal with though :( But like, he killed his abuser and now he has to live not only with that, but with his mum being in prison for it. Oof. I hope Abs takes up a healthcare profession in a few years so we can see him as a main character, because that would be really interesting. He kind of gives off the vibe that he could be the next Bobby Beale, you get me? Seeing how all of this shapes him... oh no I think I’m going to have to write an Abs Raza character study fic now.

Yet another incredible actor tonight was, of course, Guy Henry. His performances in the first scene and the last scene were particularly haunting. He is so good and I can’t praise him enough.

But I really hate the direction this is going in for Henrik. And I hate that that last scene was aired without a trigger warning. (Although I do find it fascinating that I wrote a fic - chapter 6 of “it’s death by a thousand cuts” - over a year and a half ago that had Henrik self-harming with broken glass, and now that’s actually happened in the show. What a weird coincidence.)

Henrik’s part of the storyline - and the only part, now Abs and Sahira are gone - just feels so exploitative. (Especially when you keep in mind that Henrik is autistic, this storyline is being written with that in mind, and the writers of the show are mostly abled... what’s with the weird obsession with a disabled man’s suffering, eh?) I hate it. I think I almost would rather have been right about there being no aftermath once Sahira was gone than have things playing out this way.

And Henrik being CEO again isn’t a good sign, either. At least they’ll probably actually acknowledge how harmful that job is to him this time. I can’t see this being more than a temporary thing. :/

[lonelier-version-of-you]

"this is a joke. why would we fight we're literally the same people" lmao we really are and it is so weird how the show managed to fuck up both ways especially because we know that it was plan b for both characters to handle things the way they did, it wasn't their first idea to not address anything about jac or only address henrik as late as they did so ?????

Literally!! It's just so incredibly bizarre.

The SA stuff is particularly weird to me. We know for a fact that they deliberately wrote Jac as a rape survivor (to the point of filming scenes about it, which means they had this whole aspect of her backstory fully planned out), which makes it seem almost certain that they did the same for Henrik since he was brought in.

...Then they cut the scenes that were supposed to address it with Jac. And they quietly faded out the subtext with Henrik that seemed to be going somewhere (I'm still convinced it was going to be tied into the Sahira story, not in the nonsense "his abuser was her father" way we ended up with, but in a "this is why he's treating Sahira the way he does" way, and they decided to drop it when Laila Rouass left), only to revisit the hinting now and again with his involvement in stuff like the Dom/Isaac story, his involvement in some of the scenes about Jac and Fran and the abuse at the care home (*cough* that scene in Blue Christmas, we all know the one *cough*), and, you know, gave him an entire love interest who was also heavily implied to have been sexually abused and who was strongly paralleled with both Henrik himself and Jac. (Not mentioning his reaction to Mr. T's mum assaulting him because I really hope they weren't thinking about Henrik being a CSA survivor when they wrote all that and played it for laughs.)

And then all of a sudden they went "lolz actually let's do that CSA story for Henrik but throw away like 90% of the previous foreshadowing for it by completely retconning his, Sahira's, and his and Sahira's backstories, and let's do it in the most sensationalist manner possible".

Meanwhile with Jac they leant into it repeatedly over the years after cutting the original scenes. Again, the whole Fran storyline, and how Jasmine was convinced Jac had been abused too. She was also caught up in the Gaskell stuff and paralleled with him just like Henrik was.

And they never once addressed it. And they deliberately excluded her from Henrik's CSA storyline (her return was literally the episode after the storyline was wrapped up forever, FFS) for some bizarre reason.

And then on the flipside, we have both of their bisexuality. We have confirmation Henrik was purposefully written as bi for years before it was officially made canon. But for some reason they didn't go there until the very last series. And Jac, we had multiple episodes within only a few months in 2019/2020 where her sexuality was brought up, but they suddenly stopped doing that and she never came out. (Even weirder is that this coincides with the Connie/Archie stuff, and Connie's "shocking new love interest" that never did materialise...)

And NEITHER of those Henrik stories that had been set up for years, didn't happen until the very last minute, and when they did they were handled badly (the CSA moreso than his sexuality, admittedly, but still) were even post-cancellation decisions! The CSA story was supposed to happen in 2020, and indeed even made it to air in the final months before the cancellation announcement. Henruss was in the planning before the cancellation too, we know that for a fact, because Ed Sellek was writing S23E30 (the "locked in the closet" ep/Russ opening up about Ami) when he found out the show was cancelled - plus there were multiple references to Henrik's bisexuality throughout the abuse storyline that made it clear they were planning to finally get him out the closet. So it wasn't a post-cancellation "oh, might as well bring Henrik out the closet now" thing, they just randomly decided to finally let him come out despite walking it back during the Gaskell storyline.

What was going on.