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#just give it a day lol ill figure it out
moruboru · 4 months
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buncha answer draws from ago....... from a while....... uhhh
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elfsyellowflowerzart · 6 months
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hey this is a long shot but ill draw a one character fullbody flat colored cleaned up sketch like the things above for anyone who wants to give me 15,000 treasure in flight rising i need to expand my lair, i can finish the art today 👍
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widevibratobitch · 5 months
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omw to play emotional support for my mom disguised as ✨fun family bonding time✨ for the rest of the week <3333 there's something so deeply wrong with me uwu teehee
#and i still havent texted my friend back even tho she texted me a week ago and i told her ill text her back this week when i have the time#and i DO have the time. im just fucked in the head and the prospect of having a conversation with another person where i again#have to pretend im not at the very brink of a serious mental and emotional breakdown. is making me lose my fucking mind#ik she's having a bad time rn and she needs the reassurance and jesus fucking christ i tried i had two long conversations with her#that were allllll about her. only her. not a single word about me. that's fine. this is what people need in such moments right#to just get patted on the head and hugged and told their suffering is real and what happened to them is unfair and just made to feel#that for a moment they're the centre of attention and it is all about them. this is normal. this is why therapy exists.#so i try to give this to her but it is fucking draining. and i NEVER get the same treatment back. like she caught me crying at uni last week#and like yes she'll say some nice things but she'll always find a way to turn the conversation back on the topic of ✨her✨#like we started talking about my therapy and i finally got to actually say a word or two about what im dealing with. but then she goes#'yeah im just trying to figure out what's wrong with me when i listen to you haha like i could never cut myself cause it looks ugly.#ofc it doesnt look ugly on you haha but i could never lol'#like thanks haha good to know ill just shut up then and steer the conversation back onto you why dont i. i mean its not like#i spent over an hour a few days back sitting with you and listening to your talk about your childhood and validating you and not saying#a word a single fucking word about myself even tho i was also going through it myself but who cares right. and now im the bad guy again#because im not texting back.#i feel like im finally fucking snapping cause at this point im properly fucking angry. IM having a bad time too. IM going through it too.#I have bad coping skills and had a fucked up childhood and traumas in my life TOO and im allowed to just not be able to handle it#i really wanna break something lol maybe therapy's working after all lmao#oh also this is why i dont eat breakfast. i do it once and then feel guilty and suicidal lol normal behaviour#pojebie mnie zaraz przysięgam na boga mam dość kurwa BASTA
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bunnihearted · 7 months
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🧸🧃⛈️
#so like late last night i started to get rlly panicky nd upset#bc it's v much looking like im gnna fail my english class. i need to be done next wednesday which means i need to work rlly hard#nd go to school extra to have a presentation nd do tests etc etc#nd im still in pain after surgery nd im rlly depressed bc of my physical health so i just dont think i can be strong nd make it this time#in my almost breakdown i wrote a self referral to the clinic/psych department for personality disorders....#it usually takes them around 2 days to answer you but this time at like 8am they sent me a message AND called me#(i think. im not certain it's them bc i havent checked the voice message or the reply lmaooo. but it should be them)#the thing abt having avpd is now im immediately stressed af nd i regret sending it. i donr wanna check their reply#also it might be bc i wrote a lot abt killing myseld etc etc nd now im worried theyre gnna be like girlie get checked in!!!! lol T-T#i just needed to be very clear nd act frsutrted nd desperate bc i have never gotten treatment in 10yrs nd im TIRED!!!!#my initial reaction is to avoid at all costs nd just pull my covers above my head nd pretend like i dont have to check their reply lol#i dont wannaaaaaa. i take it back i dont want help!!! its fine i dont wanna try or work hard let me rot#why did i do this!!!!! fml. anyway... i'll check later today bc since its early i can still use the excuse of sleepinf thru the days#many ppl working w mentally ill ppl understand that it's normal actually to switch the day around nd sleep during the days sksksk#but also i have no idea how many typos r in here bc im not wearing my glasses whoopsie#yeah.. anyway im gonna try to go back to sleep nd not think abt it#hopefully it wasnt even them calling 🤡 i know i HAVE to check later but not now i can take a few hours#then today i need to figure out if im gnna make one last attempt w my eng class or give up idk what to do
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hiddenbeks · 14 days
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anyway i think the staph infection did something to my brain bc i stopped caring abt dr//agon ag///e
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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year
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#well. today was a nice day of not doing anything but drawing really. theres an au where i went to art school and am a happier person lol#except not really bc im sure my head would ruin that too. anyway. its a shame i have to return to the pain tomorrow. i have so much to grade#plus a paper to write plus data to work with. a protocol to figure out. and an exam to study for and a final project thatll kill me#god. i also have to get ready for lab Monday. christ. and what shall i say to my therapist Tuesday? well we could try to tackle the deep set#looming issue that prevents me from getting better in our tiny 50min session or i could be like listen. just fucking listen. let me give u#the case 4 and against me having adhd so i can stop feeling fucking nuts. just like give me feedback. ya kno?#it would b inattentive bc im not hyper unless im losing my mind and bordering on hyp0mania. but my focus is something i cant control#executive functioning has always been a problem but now im so worn down im in danger of actual consequences. and its not just things i dont#wanna do. im not just anxiously avoiding. i cant start tasks and stick with them. i flip back and forth and get nothing done. i spiral#sometimes for hours. im not doing anything fun im just not doing anything. frozen in anguish. i dont even wanna think abt how much money ive#lost by not filling out reimbursement sheets which arent hard to do. theyre easy i just never do them. why??? i dont fucking kno. but im not#forgetful. im thinking constantly abt these things. i just cant make them happen. theyre stuck buffering. i do have memory issues tho#my short term working memory is like that of a literal child. so i cant follow complex instructions. i constantly need new info. constantly#need sound. spoken words plus music at the same time. but the main reason i need an answer to this is the reading issue. which is that im#dyslexic but also my thoughts r like an interfering frequency. without realizing ill b thinking and not reading. its a problem no matter#what im reading. its severely disruptive. i will physically read out loud to try to hold my attention in place and still get distracted by#my own head. do u kno how frustrating it is to read something aloud 3 times and not know wtf u just read bc u arent thinking abt anything#interesting u would rsther b reading but u can't fucking pay attention long enough. genuinely if its not adhd and i cant get medication to#fix my focus issues i dont kno wtf im gonna do. im so bad at reading and its extremely frustrating. but is it just dyslexia? idk what i#described doesn't fucking seem normal or like a reading problem. sounds like a focus issue. so riddle me that#idk ive got adhd on both sides of my family plus my focus fluctuates with ny hormones plus homones possibly induce hyp0mania. like i mean#ive got other issues which make a diagnosis difficult to parse but like i feel like that's decent evidence for possibly adhd? my friend said#she was always worried she had a brain tumor before she was diagnosed. to me ive always felt like my brain is full of holes. im missing the#parts that would let it operate correctly. the frontal lobe is just fucked. ugh. i wonder how much accommodation i could get from the#disability office if i actually went to them. i wont bc im fucked up and i dont think they could actually do anything for me at this stage#but alas im curious. ugh. y do i do this to myself? i kno y but not enough time for that in 50min. bad attitude mostly. half my brain#just craves death. the other half is just trying to tread water but its hard with someone trying to drown u. so its all fucked#unrelated
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izzy-b-hands · 11 months
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Izzy Hands cosplay is far from perfect (my grey hairs are still too few and don't show well, and I need actual leathers someday that eventually I'm gonna be able to save for dang it) but! It is v comfy and it's nice to dress up for the holiday
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Bonus Izzy pumpkin that Housemate helped me carve bc they Get It re: characters that live in your bones after the first time you see them and when something frustrating/sad/etc happens to them. They helped get the lil tattoo looking much better!
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jvzebel-x · 1 year
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🦋
#usually i like to think i am extremely well adjusted to what my health entails. usually lmao.#but specifically cancer sometimes feels like a goddamn anchor lmao.#stomach cancers are not even close to the only ones that could potentially go on for a lifetime w treatment#depending on situation. like this is a far more normal situation than ppl really realize i think.#i hadnt realized it before i was adjusting goal posts from 'cured' to '5yr mark' at least lol.#this is not bad. this could be signficiantly worse. this is not a bad situation all things considered.#but like sometimes i wonder what its like to be like. healthy lmao.#&when things dip its like. if this is a perma-up trajectory as far as difficulty goes it feels kind of. unfair that mine started#where it did&its just like. never gonna plateau lmao.#i question my fortitude sometimes. idk its been a long day&i havent burned thru the Bad mania yet lmao.#ill get high&itll be easier to see that w/o the pain lmao.#med change ups are never fun this one just happened at an unfortunate time in general probably.#i miss my dog. i miss all my dogs. i would have lost my mind w/o roxy lmao.#at least this time i can give him proper rites; i couldnt for yoshi or johnny. so ive been doing a full mourning period.#it hasn't put me in like. the most optimistic light as of late lol.#its weird. im being such a fucking baby about all of this lmao.#but like i also wasnt expecting unconditional love to be almost exclusive to my dogs#or for the ups&downs to still be so dramatic after all these years of figuring out treatments lmao.
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29121996 · 1 month
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arolesbianism · 5 months
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Shakes the bars of my cage I need to draw soooo bad I need to draw I need to draw let me draw I have to draw I need to draw I must draw (<- has been too sick to be on electronics much and doesn't like doing traditional art)
#rat rambles#Im starting to feel better tho Im betting within a day or two Ill have made a full recovery#but I just have so many things I wanna draw all the sudden and its killing me#its because I've been thinking abt ocs again and that gives me a lot more options lol#in particular I've been thinking abt marci and toon more again recently#its just the two of them flirting in their mutual workplace environment with toon being dead serious and marci doing it ironically#the main thing is that marci was rly under the impression that toon like. hated her and was taunting her since they're friends with loonie#who long story short is marci's ex childhood best friend who she fell out with after the death of loonie's mom#the two are not on good terms in the slightest and marci knows very well that loonie would want her dead if she had been more honest#so as toon starts to like get more casual and like genuine with marci as the two spend more time together marci warms up somewhat but still#doesn't rly see toon as a friendly figure until they take her out to a museum and marci kind of snaps a bit and asks toon to stop beating#around the bush and is caught off guard when toon seems genuinely kind of hurt and meekly explains that they were just trying to help her#because she had seemed rly stressed and sad all the time and they thought that their lil dates had been helping her relax a bit#that confrontation left marci initially feeling confused but after the initial shock she was mostly left with a sense of dread and guilt#partially because she had just snapped at someone who she had grown to care abt for no reason and partially because she now felt that she#was hiding stuff from toon that would cause them to change their mind on her immediately if they knew#aka that she and loonie are divorced and that she thinks its mom sucked absolute ass (which she did)#oh and also that she used to have a crush on the guy that killed its mom who was also his mom which is also the reason she hates said mom#said mom treated him (aka midas) like shit and tried to get him killed several times#so when all hell broke loose marci at the end ended up mourning midas much more than his mom who everyone else was mourning#including loonie since it actually had a very positive relationship with its mom and a very distant relationship from its siblings#now marci never admitted all of this to anyone but she did act on those feelings to eventually lash out at loonie causing a huge fight#basically she yelled at it for being pushy and clingy and forcing her into a job she didnt want and expecting her to solve all its problems#the two dont necessarily hate eachother but they definitely heavily resent eachother#they still often long for eachothers companionship but not nearly enough for either to wanna make ammends#so toon quite liking both of them causes some internal conflict for the both of them#loonie is fully aware that toon has a big ol crush on marci but doesnt stop them from being friends with her even if it makes it sad#and marci rly wishes that toon wasnt friends with loonie but feels guilty for feeling that way#its a complicated situation and one that rly isn't helped by the fact that one of the three has the dead god queen mom#loonie could get away with a Lot and everyone knows it
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katsukistofu · 2 months
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PLEASE (if you feel like it) WRITE FOR AIZAWA! A SICK READER TROPE MAYBE?
Btw ur fics are so good and are part of the reason why I’ve gotten back into mha <333 I love ur writing style sm and ur hawks fics??? That was amazing
hi my love! thank you so much omg that’s so sweet, i’m happy i helped you rekindle your love for mha again lol! <3
sick (but never of you)
contents ౨ৎ ⋆ s. aizawa x fem reader. fluff. cursing. 997 words ★ your husband insists on taking care of you when you fall ill, despite your protests.
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Not this shit again. 
You groan as your eyes flutter open for the second time after you said you were fine, then proceeded to dramatically faint in Shota’s arms in the middle of your patrol and sit up, hurriedly tossing the pile of soft blankets off your body.
You shiver despite the warmth radiating from the heater nearby. Shota must have brought it out for you after getting you home.
“What do you think you’re doing?” 
The disapproving voice of your husband floats over, and there he is, leaning on the doorway with a steaming bowl of something in his hands. You perk up despite yourself. Miso soup? 
“I don’t have time to sleep off a little cold, Shota!” Your arms tremble as you try to force yourself off of the plush king-sized bed. “It’s already past nine, I have to head to the agency.”
“Don’t care, didn’t ask.” Shota wraps his arms around you to trap you in place, ignoring your insistent budging. “You’re staying home today with the cat.”
“But—But they need me…” You weakly mumble in his firm grip. It was no use trying to break free, and you’re not sure if you even want to anymore with how nice he feels against you.
“And I need you here.” His stern gaze doesn’t waver, and his hand guides your head from the back of your hair, which you’re certain looks like a disaster zone right now, to rest on his chest. “It’s my job to make sure you’re safe, happy and healthy.”
Shota brushes a hair from your face and tucks it behind your ear. The little beads of sweat on your skin don’t bother him in the slightest.
“So let me do my job.”
“Are you using your teacher voice on me?” You grumble into the dark fabric of his sleeveless shirt. He smells warm and like all things good, as if he just came out of the shower. 
“I vaguely recall someone commenting that it was ‘hot.” Shota’s gravelly voice teases your ear and his stubble tickles your cheek as he smirks, knowing he’s won the battle when he finally feels you melt in defeat against him. 
He brushes a soft kiss to your forehead. “Stay in bed, sweetheart, I’ll be right back.”
“Okay.” You say in a tiny voice, weakly slumping back into the sheets. 
Shota comes back with a spoon and a folded piece of paper. A hint of a smile tugs at his lips as he holds it out to you.
“Looks like I’m not the only one that wants you to stay home.”
Your eyes widen as you look at the get-well card in your hands.
feel beter soon!! lots of loove, eri it said, with millions of tiny hearts doodled around your name. You choke back a sob as your eyes fall onto the little stick figure drawings of you pushing the little gray-haired girl on a swing set. 
It looked just like the one from the playground nearby that you would often take her to on your days off.
us when youre not sick anymor! :D
“Shota, give me that damn soup.”
He chuckles deeply and scoots closer on the bed to feed you. You squeeze your eyes shut as a sharp throb suddenly pierces through your head.
“The room’s spinning again, that’s not normal is it?”
“No. No, it’s not.” Shota’s forehead creases in concern, bringing the spoon of warm soupy goodness up to your lips while his other hand holds yours.
You part your lips to drink it, letting the rich, comforting flavor of miso spread across your tongue.
Letting out a little sigh of relief, you’re about to lean back before Shota sets the bowl down on the nightstand to prop up the pillows behind you, making sure you’re comfortable before he picks it back up again and holds up another spoonful to your mouth.
“Come on, one more for me sweetheart.” 
“Not hungry anymore,” you huff, turning your head away from his outstretched hand.
He lifts an eyebrow. 
“We can cuddle after you take your medicine.”
“...Can you rub my tummy too?”
“You know I will.”
You sniffle and reluctantly open your mouth to sip a spoonful of the soup once again.
“Atta girl.” Shota smooths a kiss on your forehead, rubbing circles against the back of your hand. 
He reaches over to the nightstand to grab your medicine he picked up from the local pharmacy earlier, and hands a small cup of what he pours to you. 
You grimace at its cherry-colored contents and tilt your head back to drink it in one go like a shot.
“Good job. Now come lay on me.” He didn’t need to ask you twice, but Shota’s hands are already on your waist to gently flip you over him as he takes your previous position on the bed, setting you down to rest your head on your usual spot on his chest.
He strokes your hair gently, arm snug against your back while he presses you to him. “How are you feeling?”
“A little bit better,” you mumble, absentmindedly tracing the outline of his abs under his shirt. It's always been soothing to you.
Shota’s chest rumbles as he lets out a husky laugh. “Are you just saying that so you can keep tracing my abs?”
“Maybe.” You giggle against him, which turns into a cough and he firmly pats your back. His hand slides under your pajamas to rub gentle circles on your tummy like he promised. You softly squeal at the ticklish feeling of his hard-earned callouses against your skin, and Shota tenderly kisses your cheek once, twice.
All your senses are numb, but you can still feel the overflowing love behind them.
“Go to sleep, sweet girl. I got you,” he murmurs into your hair.
“Okay.” You comply easily this time, nuzzling deeper into his chest. “Goodnight, Shota.”
“Goodnight, angel. Love you.”
“Love you too,” you mumble before drifting off to sleep in the safety of his warm arms.
Maybe being sick wasn’t all bad.
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auckie · 5 months
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I think the things that offend me most nowadays in like, smaller interpersonal interactions rather than grand, sweeping trends in culture, are when people chose to not partake in a wide set of things. Like musical close mindedness, or refusal to try different foods from different cultures. Not watching an entire subset of films bc they’re ‘french’. Avoiding reading bc you say you have adhd and it’s too hard. Like dude I get it, I’m busy. I can be picky. Everyone can. But the willful ignorance of closing yourself off to those VAST portions of the human experience, and not having curiosity and a lust to learn and explore art that was made by someone worlds apart from you either in terms of their culture, era, whatever. I dunno man it just pisses me off so bad. I think it’s arrogant. Like oh you’re comfortable in your safe little bubble huh? And you’re enforcing its barriers with the excuse that you’re autistic and have sensory issues. With music made by black people?? lol okay. It is pretty presumptuous for me to assume malicious intent but I think those prejudices are borne from either the comfort of being someone who’s wealthy and probably white not feeling the need to learn past what they think is enough, or it’s a reflection of a society that’s taught you to prioritize what it shills— popular, current (white, depending where you live ig) artists who are making streamlined, easy to digest content. Often when I meet people with these issues they’ll have one particular ‘niche’, and it tends to be like. 70s music. Victorian literature. Anime and Japanese games. But they’re still not really investing beyond the media presented. Like there’s so much more to Japanese culture than liking some cartoons put out between 2010-2020. You don’t gotta become some sorta Einstein who learns the background of every little freak in FGO yeah. But don’t you wanna aim higher? Aren’t you interested in any of the historical figures? And nothings wrong with hopping onto a trend. You read Dracula bc of that Dracula daily thing. Cool! Read more. Some people will say they’re chronically ill or disabled and can’t get outside. That’s okay. The internet is full of things you can read other than fanfiction, YouTube has a shit ton of free music. There’s Wikipedia and free articles online if you have questions about things. Yeah nobody is spending four hours a day looking at the national archives website and studying art history but it’s imbued in the things around you, and youll absorb it ambiently as you go along. you dont have to be a jack of all trades and cover every major genre of every major medium, but it never hurts to try! I really love seeing ppl ask too. Bc it can be kind of humiliating to admit to what seems like some jackass hipster that you’ve never delved into, idk, Serbian films (lol not that one). And hopefully if whoever you’re asking will give you honest good recommendations and not berate you. I’m kind of berate a straw man rn I guess. The hostile tone def doesn’t lend to an atmosphere of sharing but I cannot tell you how many times I’ve rbed anything involving specifically jazz only to see someone rb and add the stupidest comment on the post, or in the tags, or go into my inbox to be like waaah I don’t like jazz bc it’s boring and old and for pretentious hypocrites who hate neurodivergent people! Like what are you TALKING about. Fine if you don’t like it but don’t try and rationalize that as a moral standing you shit lark. And just as they’re allowed to dislike jazz I’m allowed to not really enjoy people who don’t like jazz. Or country. Nautical knots. Knit wear. Watching urbex YouTubers get their shit rocked by squatters. Korean food. Pachuco fashion and stupid ugly low riders. Bollywood films. and they don’t want to try any of those things either yknow? The next thing I’m getting into is circuit bending.
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danikamariewrites · 10 months
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Also I thought of a Liam or Xaden idea but maybe one of them falling for a Healer?
Always Injured
Liam Mairi x reader
A/n: since we don’t fully know a lot of the medical stuff in FW I just kinda made some stuff up lol
Warnings: mentions of injuries, fluff
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For the third time this week Xaden was escorting Liam to the infirmary. He rolled his eyes at the blondes wide grin. “You’ve never been so…reckless before. What’s going one?”
Liam shook his head, keeping his eyes on the swinging double doors as they got closer and closer. “Nothing. Challenges have been so tough, right?” Xaden gives him a quizzical look, not believing Liam is having a hard time getting through obstacle courses.
He shoulders open the door while supporting Liam, walking him over to the closest bed. Liam lays back looking around the room for you. His eyes find you listening to your teacher intently as he tends to a ill-looking scribe.
“Ok brother, you are free to go.” Xaden follows Liam’s line of sight. Xaden let’s out a long oh and sends Liam a shut eating grin. He knew there would be teasing later but he didn’t care.
“Get better soon.” Xaden says in a light teasing tone as he exits the infirmary.
-
You saw Xaden bring Liam in. You wanted to go right over to him but you knew your professor would chastise you for leaving a working-lesson. So you stayed with the sick scribe. She just needed cold medicine but learning all kind of symptoms is important.
Once you professor dismissed you to check on other patients you headed straight to Liam’s bed. You gave him a small smile as he held his left wrist out for you to take his pulse.
By now he knew the routine. Liam had been in here practically every other day. “Should you really be a rider? The amount of injuries you get I might as well tie pillows around you.” You joke with him.
Liam let’s out a small laugh as your hands kept checking different parts of his body. When you pressed on his side he winced.
Pulling up his shirt revealed a nasty bruise on his ribs. Grabbing a salve from a nearby cart you scoop out some paste, warming it between your fingers before spreading it on his skin.
“That should help with the pain.” You say quietly. Over Liam’s many trips/stays in the infirmary you grew to deeply care for him. He’s a sweet guy and was always interested in whatever you had to say.
“Thank you,” he groaned out pulling his shirt back down. “That one looks bad Liam. You need to be more careful. I’d hate to see you truly injured.” You say gravely, crossing your arms.
Liam reaches out to pull your hand into his. He gives it a light squeeze and give you a boyish grin. “Don’t worry about me sweets. I’ll be just fine.” You roll your eyes at him. “Yeah, well your visits say something different.”
You give his hand one last squeeze before turning to walk away. Liam holds on tighter, slightly pulling you back to the edge of the bed. “Wait, please don’t go yet?”
Plopping yourself on the edge of his bed you narrow your eyes at him. Giving him a knowing smirk like you just figured out his secret. “Not all your injuries have been real.” You say matter of factly.
Liam’s face turns crimson and he looks down avoiding your gaze. “Well, uhh not all of them. Maybe like a headache or two.” He mumbles.
“Any reason?” You tease, poking at his thigh. You desperately wanted to say he has a crush on you too. If he does you would much rather spend time with him outside of this room.
He looks up at you, suddenly shy like he’s speaking to you about a very awkward medical matter. “I keep coming back for you. You’re amazing and I didn’t know how to talk to you, but now I do and I want to get to know you more outside of here.”
You grasp Liam’s hand in yours, taking him by surprise. “I do too Li.” His eyes go wide with joy. “Meet me tonight? At the Bell Tower?” You nod enthusiastically.
He lets out a sigh of relief as you stand. “I have to check in other patients.” You say quietly. Liam nods giving you that boyish grin again. “I’ll see you tonight.”
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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year
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#ok so like this is fine bc im not in a horrible mood rn. this is more i feel like complaining bc what im doing is kinda ridiculous#but my memory is so bad that ill probably forget if i dont write it out. but basically 4 days a week i have to come in starting at 7.30 to#water and prep for measurements. then from 9am to 6.15pm i have to nonstop take the measurements. and theyre timed so that means#i get abt 4 min to do anything before i have to take another measurement. which is abt enough time to start to focus and then have to stop#which is very fucking frustrating. and i have to manage data. coordinate for this fucking paper. and keep track of like 10 other things for#work stuff. which means that it takes me like and hour to send easy emails and they come out all fucked uo bc my brain is so shot#but on top of that i also have to fucking do the steps to get set up for my new school in the fall. and like ive officially accepted the#offer but havent talked to my new advisor since then so now theres this weird gap where im like. uh fuck do i ask for wtf im supposed to#do? bc ive been able to do things for like 2 or 3 weeks but then my life started collapsing in around me. and like there r probably#instructions somewhere but i cant fucking read lol. whatever. hes nice i just need to find the energy and words to email him and b like lol#srry everythings been insane. but bc ive waited so long i have to compulsively keep going back to check that ive been accepted like somehow#that would change while im not looking. ugh. and ive also fucked myself over housing wise bc theres a housing shortage in the city and huge#demand of housing on camus so theres a wait list for everything but i cant fucking apply bc i cant get my id to work. and fucking idk who#to call or email abt that. but idk i might have to have roomates for a semester. or my parents offered to give me some extra money for an#apartment until i can get one that doesnt put me in the red on a grad student budget. ugh. i dont wanna do either of those things#but christ do i not want roommates. ill figure something out. its just annoying and difficult from so far away#and it makes me kinda sad bc ppl r like: r u excited?! and im like. i cant really think abt that. partly bc im constanly putting out fires#in the present so theres not really space for it. partly bc i dont allow myself to b excited abt things so as not to get my hopes up.#but just after i accepted i was excited. and now it feels like im reaching my hand out toward a floating light just out of reach. like#its a nice idea but i wont believe until it happens. but that just bc ive become distorted about things#and i dont even get a weekend bc the 4 days of measurement r friday to Monday and i cant fucking relax on weekdays bc ppl r like hey can u#do this??? and there r things i can only do on weekdays so its like ok i guess ill just suffer forever thrn. and my boss texts me like: hey#did u do X? and am like: uuuuuh i fucking dont kno what day it is anymore. i dont understand y we have to meet. lets just not talk bc im#afraid ill say something worrying. so yea its pretty fucked up rn. but this stuff ends on the 24th#then ill probably not take a break and fucking finish the measurements for another project bc i just really need it to b done. i need it#all to b done so i can fucking wash my hands of this and fucking quit and move away at the start of july... or August if i decide i hate#myself that much. ugh. at least the lab has been pretty empty so no ones seen me crying lol#also thr fucking rutgers guy emailed me yesterday like: hey u want this position? and im like bitch u r like a month too late also im in#my cringe fail era. i would not survive at ur school. ugh everything is terrible. 2 or 3 more months then i csn leave this place forever#unrelated
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neoplatinum · 7 months
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eyes | aeri 'giselle' uchinaga
summary: giselle doesn't like how close yunjin has been with you recently...
pairing: aeri x 5th member!reader
themes: slight angst (not really lol), huh yunjin in the house!, fluff at the end, overall just giselle not being subtle, brief mention of kazuha
wc: 1.1k
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giselle likes the idea of watching people’s eyes, she especially likes watching your eyes. she’s spent practically every second of her trainee days analyzing what each change of your eyes means. she knows what they mean when they stare back at giselle’s, the slight raise in the eyebrow and the warm cheeks, you like giselle. with this newfound information, giselle was more confident thinking of a plan to confess to you.
but recently, giselle is finding it harder to trust the meaning behind your eyes, despite seeing the love and joy spill from your gaze, she sees something different in them, a new contendor, namely yunjin.
yunjin had been an old trainee with you and the rest of aespa. a rare foreign trainee from america, you were immediately intrigued, often asking yunjin new phrases in english, or what the culture is like in america. giselle remembers you explaining that your older sister had moved to america when you were younger, leaving an amazing impression of the country. when yunjin returned to korea and debuted in le sserafim, you were overjoyed to spend time with her again.
currently, giselle watches with stern eyes as yunjin shares photo of the states with you. she watches the hand that is wrapped around your chair as you lean into yunjin to get a better view of her phone. giselle also eyes the way yunjin’s eye flits between her phone and your eyes. a gaze she doesn’t enjoy.
giselle rolls her eyes and walks away from the aespa green room to cool off her mind from the sight of you and yunjin. winter gives karina a knowing look and both of them laugh while you’re confused why giselle walked out of the room.
“well i have to go back to the girls, but dont be a stranger, ill see you later cutie!” yunjin gave you a tight hug and waved to the other girls and left. after yunjin left, karina and winter burst into even louder laughter.
“what? what’s so funny?” you look between the two girls, winter doubles over and jimin continues laughing and pointing at winter. ningning on the other hand looks at you with an amused smile.
“you should go find giselle, these two are just being foolish.” ningning points to the door, she sighs and tries offering a hand to winter while you stare at all three of them in confusion.
walking out of the green room into the long hallways of inkigayo makes you more nervous, theres so many people it would be hard to spot giselle. you try and stand on your tippy toes multiple times walking around to find giselle at the vending machine.
“hey, you okay?” you stand next to giselle.
she continues looking at the drinks. not lifting her eyes. “yes.”
“are you sure? you left the room suddenly, is your stomach okay?” you offer, giselle looks even more upset.
“im fine, why don’t you ask yunjin if she’s okay?” giselle bites out, now she stares into your eyes with an unexpected intensity.
“yunjin? why would i ask her if she’s okay?” giselle rolls her eyes and walks away from you, away from the aespa waiting room.
“hey wait! giselle!” she grabs your hands and pulls you into the girls bathroom.
“why can’t you see that yunjin is into you?” giselle puts one hand on her hip and another on the sink. you’re thrown off but clearly nervous because giselles never acted like this before.
“she’s not into me! shes just showing me pictures of her trip to new york.” you try to explain but giselle is nodding her head no.
“that girl keeps trying to put her arm around your waist and you don’t even bat an eye!” giselle is exasperated and frustrated.
“i didn’t notice that, but i don’t understand why you’re upset at me?” you’re trying to figure out where you went wrong.
“you dummy, i know you’re into me, you shouldn’t entertain other people.” she hardens her tone, meanwhile you’re speechless.
“how did you even find out?” you let out while running your hands through your hair. you try and quickly think of all the signs that you might have dropped on accident. you thought you were subtle enough that no one would notice.
“you absolute idiot, of course i noticed, im into you too dummy.” she explains as if it's common knowledge. by now you're even more taken aback, giselle never showed interest in you, which is why you never even confessed to her.
“wait, you like me back? like you’re not joking?” you try to wrap your head around the conversation, but you're too stunned by all the new information.
giselle groans and stomps her foot, going silent and starting to walk out of the bathroom, you grab her hand and keep her from walking away.
“giselle, do you mean it? you like me back?” you grow more confident and stare into her eyes, you watch them become more vulnerable.
“yes, i really do. will you please stop letting yunjin flirt with you?” she pleads with a quiet voice.
“of course. come here.” you hug her tightly and wrap your arms around her waist. she tucks her head into your chest, and you smile and kiss her on the cheek.
“i know why you’re so upset.” you say in a teasing tone, she tenses up and attempts to push herself away from you, you instead hold her tighter against you.
“yeah, why do you think im upset?” giselle rolls her eyes at your knowing smile.
“you’re jealous of yunjin aren’t you?” you even poke at her cheek and giggle when she tries swatting your hand away,
“shut up, dummy.” she groans.
“i knew it!” you laugh loudly and she starts pinching your cheeks. “ow ow ow! giselle!”
“stop laughing, its not funny.”
“it is funny because you have nothing to be jealous about, i only want you aeri.” she smiles widely and grows embarrassed. “plus im pretty sure she’s in love with kazuha” giselle nods as you explain yunjin's dynamic with kazuha. “it’s always: zuha would love this! i should get zuha this! do u think zuha likes this shirt?”
“sounds like she needs to grow a pair and confess.” giselle laughs at that.
“what do you think ive been trying to help her with lately….” you let out a groan just thinking about the amount of times yunjin has spammed your phone about her infatuation with kazuha.
“yunjin will figure it out she’s a smart girl….let’s go back to the waiting room.” giselle grabs hold of your hand and you stand straight as a rod.
“yes ma'am!” you smile at giselle, and salute her. all she can see is the beautiful warm eyes that stare back at her, even if you are the siliest person she's met.
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a/n: this is my first ever piece that i am posting yay! hope u enjoy <3
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koolades-world · 5 months
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hiii i was wondering if you could write abt an asian mc ? with the brothers or the dateables i don't mind! i just think it would be funny to see yk asian mc who's a high achiever (so even at RAD when they know nothing abt magic they'll try to score high), always take off their shoes before entering a place (entering a place with shoes is forbidden !!), always cook rice or stuff from their country when on cooking duties ("wdym we already ate that when it was my turn last time?"), will make you special herbal tea if you're sick (first time i suggested to make tea for my ill white friend they laughed :( ), tells you to eat more and in the same fashion, whose love language is giving you food, etc... bonus point if mc swears in their mother tongue. And if the MC was living in their native country before going to the devildom, their ability to just nap anywhere as if it's normal.
As someone who grew up in an asian household it's just regular to me but i can picture the face Lucifer would make if the first time mc enter Dia's castle they take off their shoes casually or like MC stuffing Beel's mouth with food as if he just didn't swallow the biggest mouthful of udon ever saying "come on Beel you need food, you need strength to play Fangol"
For the nap thing i was thinking about my relatives who take nap on their wooden bad or just the floor during summer (cause its fresh yk). My grandma always said a hard bed is good for the back lol
Anyway no pressure!! Have a nice day and take care !
hi!! yes of course :)
i'm a different flavor of asian but some of the culture overlaps so this was fun to write! haha the amount of times my grandma has urged me to eat more is hard to count. oh and the amount of tea i drank when we went to visit. i'll never forget watching her make the tea because it was a whole experience
i'm half indian and someone actually requested an indian mc so that will be out tomorrow because doing these requests back to back easiest for me!
enjoy <3
Asian Mc
Lucifer
you're ALWAYS on him for the amount of coffee he drinks
you also always make sure he takes a break to eat dinner because he needs to eat in order to continue his work
despite how bothered he might seem sometimes, he really does value what you do for him
plus, you not only keep yourself in line, sometimes you do his brothers for him too. thanks on his behalf!
Mammon
once you grow closer, he's asking you to teach him swear words so he can cuss out lucifer
if you don’t, well, he’ll just pick them up when you swear and hope he can figure out what it means haha
if you want, feed him random words, or even compliments so when lucifer hears them, he'll just be confused haha
despite the fact that he's the demon, maybe you can help him in class
Levi
when he first meets you, he'd not sure what to expect
however he quickly learns you're the best at everything you do
this includes video games and everything of that manner
he's got competition now, but he has no clue how you got so good considering it was probably your first time at all of the games you've tried
Satan
he's impressed by your work ethic and desire to achieve
you got dropped in a totally new environment and instead of struggling to adjust like he predicted, you bounced back almost immediately and were at the top of your class like it was nothing!
he tried to ask you once why you seemed so determine to get the best grade and never asked again after the look you gave him
something the two of you can bond over, though, is tea! he can often be seen with a cup of tea so that's an easy conversation starter between the two of you if not homework instead
Asmo
while initially he thought you two might not get along, you actually do quite well
he's huge on no shoes in the house and especially in his room
after all, he wants to avoid bringing as many outside germs into his room as possible
can and will ask you to teach him how you make your special herbal teas because he hates being sick and genuinely just wants to know
Beel
he falls in love with your rice cooker
rice that easy and that quick? sign him up! if he didn't already love rice you've put him on it
he doesn't think he could ever part with you and your wonderful cooking
even if you do cook the same thing every time it's your turn, he will inhale it because not only is it delicious, but you're an amazing cook
Belphie
even he's impressed by your ability to fall asleep anywhere
at least he's always with his pillow and maybe a blanket but he's seen you just curled up on the porch waiting for someone to get home
but that sighting was rare, because he felt like he always saw you doing something
however he really appreciated all the little things you did for him, such as making his bed
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