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#just shows how much i love oversharing in here
dykedragons · 2 years
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i love making things for my friends!! i love it when my friends enjoy the things i make them!!!!!
#ramblies#i just appreciate them all so much. its the little things- the pins ive made them on their bags‚ the art ive made them as icons on socials#maybe its not much to them but its everything to me to know that the little things ive spent a little time making are worn#like badges of honor. its so special to me.#like‚ generally now i just feel so valued. my relationships are natural and reciprocal.#its like... finally!! THIS is what ive been fucking missing this whole time!! this ease!!#i dont need to prove myself‚ to compensate‚ to ask for reminders that im valued. they show me all the time. i never have to ask.#i dont know what happened. i dont know what changed from high school to now. i became a better person‚ i met better people? both.#i dont care how long it lasts or if its not this good forever. im just happy to be here. i finally feel worthy of this‚ without question#ive only known them for a few months but its the most secure ive ever felt.#maybe im oversharing!! i dont know!! i cant tell them outright ill overwhelm them!! its my blog and i can overshare if i want to!!#i dont know. im just grateful.#in other news i cleaned up my room a bit too‚ did lots of housework. always feels really cleansing.#after a stressful day yesterday this is what ive needed. a self care day. i have a lot of stuff to do but... it can wait while i rest lol#idk its just. so special to feel like i finally dont have to be the ''best'' or whatever to be loved. im loved as i am.#no arbitrary comparisons. its not conditional. i dont need to compete‚ i always feel like theres room. i hope we all thrive.
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cryolyst · 1 year
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~
#hi :) long time no incredibly long winded and overly detailed oversharing in the tags post <3#and what better way to welcome new followers from the aita comment (hi new ppl. i havent had nonbots follow me in so long)#thinkin abt that post that's like#'which person that you would never like romantically in your life would people ship you with if your life was a show'#in reference to my own life ofc. and besides the obvious answers of 1.) people will ship anything together so literally everyone#and 2.) my close friends that i jokingly flirt with or just have more life partner-y plans with (eg. being potential roommates)#i think of H. who i did in fact at one point have romantic inclinations towards. but has now gone in a weird direction of kinda resentment#and it's just kind of messy to think about for me. i think a big portion of it is the fact that the time i had romantic feelings for them#was right in the time where they were insistent they were exclusively attracted to men only and i was very much not male aligned then#so i forced myself to stamp out all those feelings because we were incompatible in that sense. and then a few years later#they came out as attracted to ppl regardless of gender and i figured out that on occasion my gender is in fact masc lmao#but by then i had moved on and they started growing into a different person#and our relationship and way we interacted evolved too and now im here. in this place where they honestly sort of piss me off#it pisses me off how they will simultaneously justify their other relationships that they seem so discontent with with phrases like#'oh but the other person is just going through a lot right now. they're just busy. i'm honestly just exaggerating. i care about them a lot'#and also complain nonstop about those same people they claim to be so understanding about#and constantly tell me how their needs aren't being met. and then shut me down when i tell them to like... communicate those needs#and i keep thinking. is there a world where i managed to hold my seemingly unconditional love for them from those past years.#is there a world where i didn't grow tired of them. where i stayed patient. where i became the person they could lean on without complaint.#is there a world where the idea of ever actually being in a more involved place with them doesn't make me bone deep exhausted#nevermind a long term monogamous romantic relationship. the idea of spending a night together sounds so draining#and it's just. wild to think about how we got here. that once upon a time i wanted to spend every waking moment talking to this person#we texted each other nonstop. i thought that everything they said was so wonderful. that i didn't and couldn't have enough of them.#and now... trying to get them to respond to me feels like pulling teeth. making plans together is a nightmare.#and when they talk... it's either incredibly surface level feeling quips or a mutual disagreement or straight up one sided talking#i guess a part of it is the fact that we've both focused our efforts elsewhere. that we aren't nurturing this friendship like we once were.#but i wished it was because we built a solid enough foundation for us to keep coming back to each other#instead it feels like they've just assumed that i will always be there. because i haven't given them any reason to believe otherwise.#so it's fine if they ignore my requests to be less negative or more responsive or to give two shits about my health and comfort#or remember what my schedule looks like or any details of my recent ongoings or any promise they've made to me over the years
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yuyusuyu · 1 year
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the princess treatment chronicles!
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pairing. non idol! best friend! song mingi x non idol! fem! reader
synopsis. the five times you accidentally completed the steps that would make mingi swoon also known as the five times you accidentally gave him princess treatment and he kept falling harder for you each time
warnings. mentions of food, getting sick, fire (someone get mingi away from the grill), cursing (wooyoung naur)
genres. romance, fluff, comedy, best friends to something more
ft. non idol! ateez
wc. 3k
pt 2. here !
a/n. happy birthday to our lovely mingi :( (this was supposed to be posted in two days wtaf 😭 guys pls just ignore and pretend it was posted on his bday 😭 my queue os my biggest enemy now)
reblogs and comments are appreciated! helps with not getting shadowbanned!
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MINGI has a list. it's a special list to him, one that speaks volumes about him.
speaks volumes about a step-by-step process on how to make him, song mingi, fall in love with someone.
now, this list is hidden in his notes app, and the physical copy of this is hidden in one of his math notebooks from high school. he is the only person to know about this list, other than his best friend, of course (only because yunho accidentally saw him writing it out instead of doing math homework with him).
yunho calls it 'a step-by-step guide to the princess treatment' but mingi likes to correct his friend, telling him that it's actually called 'the way to song mingi's heart.'
yunho likes to call it otherwise.
but what does that have to do with you? well, for starters, mingi met you through yunho. it was completely accidental. according to yunho, he was never going to introduce you because you're like a little sister to him and you might end up stealing mingi from him by being your lovable self. instead of that happening, you two had instantly clicked and the three of you became a little trio, one that somehow always managed to spend time with each other everyday.
crazy.
how mingi and yunho managed to keep the list a secret from you, they have no idea (and yunho has no idea why mingi doesn’t want you knowing. the three of you tell each other everything to the point that it can be seen as oversharing at times), how they’ve managed to keep this list hidden from you for so long—three years, to be exact.
until now, that is.
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STEP ONE TO MAKE SONG MINGI FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU: RUN INTO A PUBLIC PLACE IN A DRAMATIC MANNER WITH SOMETHING OF IMPORTANCE TO MINGI ! (IT SHOWS THAT YOU CARE VERY MUCH ABOUT HIM TO THE POINT OF NOT CARING ABOUT HOW OTHER PEOPLE SEE YOU)
mingi frowns as he looks down at his phone, eyebrows furrowed when he looks up at yunho. “she’s ten minutes late.”
yunho nods, also frowning. “maybe something came up and that’s why she’s running late?”
slumping down in his seat, mingi sighs, grumbling, “yeah, but she would’ve texted us by now if something happened. you know how yn is…”
the bells of the café entrance chimes, signaling the appearance of a customer. mingi, at this point, has given up checking if every new customer that walks into the café is you. he folds his arms on the table, resting his head as he pouts.
“oh yn!”
and then he immediately perks up in his seat, excitedly turning around to face you. yunho gets up, giving you a hug before ushering you into the seat next to mingi’s.
“i’m so sorry,” you wheeze, “i was going to text the group chat but then my phone died.”
yunho tilts his head. “your phone died? you don’t usually use your phone while you have a shift at the restaurant.”
“i don’t,” you say, running a hand through your tousled hair. “but i forgot to charge my phone before i left my place, and then when i went to that doughnut place, the lines were ridiculously long but i was already in line so i decided to suck it up and—"
“woah,” laughs mingi. “slow down.”
“sorry,” you mumble, sighing and taking in a breath before continuing. “i went to the doughnut place that just opened up. i read on a forum that wednesday afternoons are usually the slowest, so i decided i’d stop by before coming over to the cafe to study with you guys. when i got there, there was already a line that was about to start wrapping around the store, so i had to beat this lady next to me that wanted to get in line.”
“a lady,” yunho repeats, chuckling. 
you hum. “yeah. i beat her to it, by the way. anyway, i was checking the time and saw it was already nearing the time we decided on, so i was in the middle of sending a text when my phone died.” you take out your phone from your tote bag along with a box.
it’s then that cogs in mingi’s brain starts working when he eyes the cursive lettering on the box.
“oh, isn’t that the doughnut place mingi’s been wanting to try out?” yunho asks, hands stretching out to grab the box.
you slap his hands, earning a laugh from the taller male as he brings them back to his side. “yes,” you reply, side-eyeing yunho. “meaning this isn’t for you.”
grabbing the box, you sheepishly smile at mingi, handing it over to him. “i know you’ve been trying to find the time to go over and try their doughnuts, but since my workplace is closer… i mean, why not?”
“excuse us for a second,” mingi mumbles, leaving you confused as he grabs yunho’s arm and drags him over to a corner in the cafe. once you’re out of earshot, mingi clears his throat. “what the hell was that?”
“what was what?” whispers yunho, blinking as he watches mingi glance over at you. you’re in the middle of trying to tame down your wild hair.
“she just completed step one.”
yunho gasps, turning mingi around by his shoulders. “no way,” he says. “did you tell her about the list?”
“what? no!” he cries out. “how did she even do it? yunho, i swear if you told her—”
“that’s not my secret to tell!” yunho whisper-shouts. “listen, this was probably a one time thing. there’s no way she even knows about it. plus, maybe she was just feeling a little generous today towards you!”
mingi slowly nods. “yeah,” he mumbles. “yeah, you’re right. let’s head back before yn starts asking questions…”
yunho was not right.
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STEP TWO: IN MINGI’S TIME OF NEED, DO WHATEVER YOU CAN IN ORDER TO MAKE HIM FEEL HAPPY (THIS IS TO SHOW THAT YOU WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR HIM NO MATTER WHAT TIME IT IS OR WHAT YOU’RE DOING)
mingi grumbles as he kicks his shoes off and drops his things on the floor by the door, closing it and shuffling over to his room as he angrily sends a text to the group chat.
it’s already one in the morning. yunho is most likely gaming and you’re most likely already sleeping. regardless, mingi still sends a text and doesn’t bother waiting for an answer as he flops down into his bed face-first.
he barely manages to make out the sound of his phone ringing. he blindly searches for his phone until his hand finally finds it. grunting, he brings it to his face, his eyes squinting at the screen from the brightness in comparison to his dark room.
yn: you still have your spare key in the same place, right?
mingi: i thought you had my spare after last time?
he sees that you’re in the middle of typing, so he waits until you finally send another message.
yn: oh
yn: yeah, you’re right. just found it on my keychain 
mingi: i’m always right
yn: mmmmmm i wouldn’t say that but sure…
mingi: bruh
again, the typing bubble pops up on his screen before it disappears. mingi’s a bit confused, he won’t lie. he thought you would already be sleeping, but you weren’t. he snorts. “she asked me about my spare key instead of what’s wrong…?”
he shakes his head, stuffing it into his pillow. “whatever,” he mumbles.
mingi swears he’d only closed his eyes for a brief moment when the sound of his door unlocking fills the air. he stiffens in his bed before scrambling off, fumbling to find something to protect himself. he unplugs the lamp by his nightstand and grips it tightly, quietly tiptoeing towards his door.
“mingi?”
“yn, what the hell?” mingi groans, stepping out of his room and walking into the living room area of his apartment.
you narrow your eyes in confusion, pointing at the lamp he’s still holding. “why do you have a lamp in your hand?”
“the real question here is why are you here?” he huffs, leaning down to put the lamp on the floor. mingi then crosses his arms over his chest, “and why aren’t you sleeping?”
“i was about to sleep,” you say, walking past mingi and into his room. he follows you, his mouth open in surprise. “but then you texted that you had a shit day, so here i am.” you drop the bag you’re holding onto his bed, turning around. “now why the hell did you have a lamp in your hand?”
mingi clears his throat. “i, uh, thought someone was breaking in…”
you snort, sitting on his bed and patting the space next to the bag. “that’s funny, mings. no one is going to break in if you’re a broke college student.”
huffing, he grumbles as he sits down on his bed, bringing his knees up to his chest. “shut up.”
“mhm,” you hum. “now tell me about why you had a shit day while we eat some of your favorites, yeah?” you stick your hand into the bag and take out one of his favorite snacks, opening the bag and handing it over to him while you shift around to face him.
he thinks his heart started beating a little too fast for his liking.
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STEP THREE: WHEN MINGI IS STRUGGLING TO DO SOMETHING, JUST DO IT FOR HIM WITHOUT EVEN ASKING IF HE NEEDS ASSITANCE (THIS IS TO SHOW THAT YOU NOTICE WHEN HE IS STRUGGLING)
you look between yunho and mingi. yunho’s trying so hard not to laugh, but his smile gives him away. he obviously finds mingi struggling to light the grill amusing. 
“c’mon,” you slap yunho’s arm, earning a whine from him. “don’t be a bully.”
“yeah, yunho,” mingi says, looking up for a brief second to glare at him before looking back at the box of matches in his hand. “don’t be a bully.”
you gently take the box away from mingi’s hands, taking out a match and striking it against the box, a flame appearing. you grab the lighter fluid and pour some on the charcoal before  chucking the match into the grill, a fire immediately coming to life.
mingi gasps and hides behind you, startled. yunho laughs at the sight. “no way you’re hiding behind yn right now,” he says, wiping tears away from his eyes. “she’s literally so short compared to you.”
“shut up, jeong yunho.” you point at him. “or else i’ll change my netflix password.”
yunho gasps. “you wouldn’t dare!”
as you and yunho quarrel, mingi sighs, hiding his face in his hands when he feels the back of his neck grow unbearably hot.
you are doing a number on him.
and he’s a little scared.
because you’re his best friend.
and he can’t believe that his best friend, of all people, would be completing his five-step-guide in making him fall for someone.
he has to talk to yunho soon about this.
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STEP FOUR: WHEN MINGI IS HURT, HELP AND CODDLE HIM (THIS IS TO SHOW THAT YOU CARE A LOT ABOUT HIM)
he never got the chance to talk to yunho about this.
after your impromptu bbq day at yunho’s place, mingi ended up getting sick. he didn’t tell anyone, not wanting to bother anyone and burden them with taking care of him. so here he is, laying in his bed, shivering and clutching onto his blankets for dear life.
he hears his front door clicking open, and he groans. “go away!” he croaks, sneezing afterwards. “i have nothing to offer you, you thief!”
you laugh. “seriously? you think i’m some robber again?”
at the sound of your voice, mingi’s heart skips a beat. he clears his throat. “no… what are you doing here? i seriously need to take my spare key away from you…”
“yeah, yeah,” you say, walking into his room and raising an eyebrow when you see the state he’s in. “why didn’t you tell yunho or i about this, mings? we would’ve come running to you.”
he sneezes. “i didn’t want to annoy anyone,” he says, lowering his blankets from his face just to see you.
you click your tongue and walk to the side of the bed, pressing your hand to the back of his forehead. “don’t be silly, mingi. you know we don’t find you annoying… at least i don’t find you annoying,” you mumble, straightening your back and walking out of the room. “i’m going to make you some soup, you weakling! don’t get up!”
mingi lets out a weak laugh, sneezing afterwards. “yes, ma’am…”
“what was that?”
“yes, ma’am!” he yells, his voice cracking. mingi hears you giggle to yourself.
he huffs, pulling his blankets over his head.
when you’re done making the soup, you carry a bowl and some cough medicine into his room and find that he’s asleep. you set the bowl on his nightstand, shaking him awake as gently as possible. “mingi,” you whisper. “mingi, i have the soup. i need you to wake up so that i can feed you.”
“feed me?” he asks, whispering.
you hum, opting to card your hand through his hair that’s been growing out recently. “yeah, i need to feed you.”
“feed… feed me?” mingi screeches, abruptly sitting up. you gasp, almost falling off the bed.
clearing your throat, you reach out to grab the bowl, placing it in your lap and grabbing a spoonful, blowing on it slightly before leaning away. “here…”
mingi stares at you, wide-eyed.
you purse your lips. “mingi, i need you to eat so that you can get better.”
“right!” he says, his voice an octave higher than usual as he moves to eat the soup. when he leans back, mingi sees you smiling at him.
his stomach does some summersaults.
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STEP FIVE: TAKE CARE OF MINGI (THIS SHOWS THAT HE IS VERY IMPORTANT TO YOU)
mingi puffs his cheeks out, trying not to laugh as he takes out his keys.
“yunho, i need you to carry the cake… actually, never mind, jongho can you please carry the cake?”
yunho gasps. “yn, do you not believe in me and my capabilities to carry a cake?”
“...no, i don’t.”
“what the—”
hongjoong claps once. “stop fighting!” he says. “mingi’s going to be here any minute now—”
“actually,” pipes up seonghwa. “it says that he just arrived.”
“what the fuck!” wooyoung screams. “guys, hurry the fuck up! he’s coming!”
“wooyoung… stop screaming… you’re giving us away,” yeosang says.
“yeah, what my boyfriend said.” san says.
“san, dude, how many times do i have to tell you that i am not your boyfriend.”
mingi takes in a deep breath before shoving his keys into the lock, the noise going on on the other side immediately stopping. he can hear you all shuffling around until someone whisper-shouts at jongho to go shut the door.
“what the—but i’m carrying the cake?” jongho sounds baffled.
“give me the cake and go stop mingi from coming in! yunho hasn’t finished hanging the stupid banner!” you cry out.
mingi assumes jongho’s laying his weight on top of the door because he can’t push it open.
“did you just call me stupid, yn?”
“no, but i will if you don’t hurry up!”
“guys,” hongjoong sighs, and mingi can bet that he’s rubbing his temples. “i think mingi can hear you.”
he sure can.
“okay, jongho come back!”
mingi snorts, pushing the door open and flicking the lights on. yunho’s awkwardly holding the end of a birthday banner up while the other end is taped onto the wall. hongjoong and seonghwa both sigh in unison at how badly the surprise is coming along, and wooyoung and san are trying to push each other out of the way so that one of them can stand next to yeosang, who is rolling his eyes and trying to shuffle away from the two. jongho stands to your side, the only one who is actually smiling at him—oh, he’s lying.
you’re smiling at him while holding a birthday cake.
“suprise, mings!” you say.
everyone yells happy birthday to him, and somehow he finds himself getting shoved by wooyoung towards the small table he has by the kitchen. you’re standing next to him, laughing as you put the paper party hat on his head, making sure that the thin string is secured underneath his chin before moving to get the knife.
“let mingi cut the cake!” wooyoung yells.
“he could get himself cut, and the birthday boy shouldn’t have to do it unless he wants to,” you chide, glancing up at mingi through your eyelashes. “do you want to cut it, mings?”
he swallows the lump in his throat, shaking his head afterwards. “no,” he breathes out, licking his lips. “you can do it for me, if that’s okay.”
you grin at him, carefully cutting up the cake. you place the slices on plates, making sure that the biggest slice goes to mingi.
oh no, he thinks.
you’ve officially completed his five-step-guide to his heart.
“um, yn?” mingi leans down to whisper into your ear.
you hum in response.
“can we talk for a sec?”
nodding, you let yourself get dragged by mingi into his room. after closing the door, he looks at you and you notice that his ears are very red.
“are you okay?” you ask, pointing at your ears. “your ears are red.”
mingi whines, covering his face with his hand. “can you turn around real quick?”
“okay…”
mingi peeks through his fingers, sighing in relief when your back is facing him. he clears his throat and wipes the palms of his hands on his jeans. “i, uh… would you like to go out for dinner sometime this week?”
“as a date?” you ask, fighting the urge to turn around to look at him.
in a small voice, mingi replies. “yeah… as a date.”
“i’d like that.”
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ggukiepie · 1 year
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one of your girls (jungkook x reader) (part 1)
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we don't gotta be in love, no i don't wanna be the one, no i just wanna be one of your girls tonight ~ i wanna take your light inside dim me down, snuff me out ~ give me tough love leave me with nothin' when i come down
pairing: fwb!jk x oc, brief jimin x oc
tags: smut, angst, a little bit of fluff (like teeny tiny)
warnings: two smut scenes, kissing, marking (hickeys), fingering, brief handjob, protected sex, slight dom!jk, sub!oc, praise, dirty talk, grinding, edging, oral (f. & m. receiving), throat fucking, dacryphilia, spit kink, brief masturbation (m.), squirting, brief anal play, back shots, cum shot, multiple orgasms (you'll see), aftercare
word count: 5.8k
a/n: been in my feels lately i had to write it out lol; wrote this in one sitting my hands actually hurt omg; inspired by the song "one of your girls" (ik don't roast me idk why it's stuck in my head fml); if this gets taken down then bye bye i literally just wrote it here directly lmaooooo; anw enjoy !!!! part 2 / drabble i (flashback)
..••°°°°••..°°••....••°°..••°°°°••..
You knew what you were getting yourself into the night you said yes to Jungkook. You knew you'd fall for him, be under his spell. You knew you'd end up getting hurt. You prepared yourself, you really did, yet you were still surprised when you woke up each morning and he wasn't beside you in bed. You felt your heart break a little bit more when you saw him with another girl, whether she'd be one of your friends or a complete stranger to you.
You tried to guard your heart. Reminded yourself to prepare for the worst. Forced yourself not to fall, not to be blindsided. I'm just having a little fun, you told yourself for the nth time.
jk: u busy tonight?
you: not really! just writing a paper that's due next week
That was sent hours ago and you mentally cringe at your reply. You always find yourself oversharing to Jungkook when you didn't even need to. You wanted to make it seem like your whole situationship was just casual. Like you didn't care. He rarely shared much about his personal life and so should you. But that hardly happened. You didn't want him to think that you cared, that you were clingy or waiting for him to text. You didn't even wait five minutes before replying and he hasn't even texted back.
You know what his text means. He wants to fuck and that's it. But he doesn't say it outright. No, never. He wants to make it seem like he cares, that he wants to know how your night is going. But he just wants to know if you're free to fuck and once you reply, he'll keep that as a reminder in the back of his mind, like he has a mental list of girls he can sort through at the end of the night when he's bored or when he wants to have a little bit of fun.
You know you're just one of his girls on his roster and you're fine with that. You're not his girlfriend and he's not your boyfriend. Though it does seem like that on some days, which is when you get the courage to not reply to his texts. When you try to shut him out and move on. He usually shows up outside your lecture hall with a cup of coffee in hand, bunny smile on his face as he waits for you to walk into the hallway. Like he's waiting for you, picking you up from class like a good and loving boyfriend.
It's all for show and it's only to get himself on your good side again. It works every time. You don't question yourself anymore. Jungkook likes the chase, likes the adrenaline of going after girls and trying to get them to fall for him, or sleep with him, or whatever. It's all the same to him.
You sigh again as you check your phone, hoping for a reply but knowing he won't text back. It's a Friday night and he's probably at some party. You go through your texts and open the conversation with your best friend.
jihyo: see u later! im picking u up so u better be ready >:(
You can't help but laugh at her insistence. Jihyo knows what you're going through since you tell her everything. You tell her you don't care though, that you're not looking for a relationship right now and your "thing" with Jungkook is just casual. But you know she sees right through your lies. It's even more obvious when you ghost all your friends and lock yourself in your apartment every night. She's trying to make you forget and move on and have some actual fun so you indulge her every time.
You get ready in less than an hour and actually put some effort into your appearance. You're not sure which party you're going to but you won't be surprised if Jungkook will be there as well. Maybe if you look hot enough he'll choose you tonight.
You hear a knock on your door and open it immediately, finding Jihyo laughing at something her boyfriend has just said. Most of the time you end up hanging out with her and Mingyu because she's always dragging you with her to keep you from being lonely. You don't mind it though because they're fun people to be with. Even though Mingyu is Jungkook's roommate and best friend. But Mingyu isn't anything like Jungkook. He looks at Jihyo like she's hung up the stars and moon. Loves her with all his heart and doesn't leave her second guessing. You always wonder why him and Jungkook are friends when they're so different.
Jihyo turns to smile at you, but it's still the lovestruck smile she gave Mingyu just seconds ago. You know you have the same kind of smile reserved for Jungkook. You wish you didn't but at the same time you're glad you do, like you have a part of yourself only Jungkook can see. Even though he doesn't do the same.
"You look so hot tonight!" she squeals as she pulls you in a hug. You laugh and roll your eyes, making eye contact with Mingyu as he nods his head in greeting. Jihyo steps back and grabs your hand, dragging you out your apartment so fast you barely have time to lock the door behind you. "Let's go before all the good drinks are gone."
It's a short but fun walk to the house where the party is being held. You find yourself laughing with Jihyo and Mingyu the whole time. They're the type of couple that doesn't make third wheeling a bore.
Loud music blares in your ears the moment you step inside. You feel your heels sticking to the floor. A typical frat house throwing a typical Friday night party. You immediately take shots with Jihyo and Mingyu. You need it to be able to survive the night since you already feel yourself tensing up at the possibility of Jungkook being in the same place as you.
You spot your other friends and hangout with them for the rest of the night. It's when you're playing beer pong with Jimin as your partner do you see Jungkook at the other side of the room. He's talking to some girl which is nothing new. It shouldn't phase you but it does. You thought you were going to be his pick for the night since he texted you a while ago.
You feel your heart fall at the sight of them, your chest physically hurting that you make Jimin throw the ball twice for the both of you since you can't focus. You feel all the fun and happiness slowly leave your body. You feel your stomach churn at the way he's got her trapped against the wall, tattooed arm placed beside her head, mouth whispering right against her ear. She's smiling and giggling at whatever Jungkook is telling her. You wish that were you.
"Forget about him," Jimin mutters in your ear. He's watching your beer pong opponents take their turn as you're watching Jungkook and the girl.
You shake your head at Jimin, turning your head to smile at him just to make it seem like you're okay. Just like Jihyo, he sees right through you.
Jimin's another close friend of Jungkook. They're not so different. Jimin likes to sleep around but he makes it clear that he doesn't want anything serious. Always nice and gentle with the girls he sleeps with. Jungkook makes it seem like you're his and only his. You wonder again why they're friends.
"Seriously, Y/N," Jimin says, a little bit of urgency in his tone. It's probably the look of longing on your face that raises concern in your friend. Everyone sees how broken you look when you catch Jungkook with another girl.
"I know," you say after a while. You talk just a little bit loud enough to be heard over the music. "Jungkook and I just sleep with each other. It's casual and that's it."
You hear Jimin sigh. He nods his head and it's his turn to throw the dirty ping pong ball. You've had this conversation with him and Jihyo numerous times already, sometimes it's the both of them and sometimes it's on separate occasions. You say the same thing every time. You think your friends are starting to give up on you. Maybe you should as well.
You force yourself to have fun for the rest of the night, always trying to be in a room where Jungkook isn't. You're not sure if he's spotted you. You don't know which hurts more—him not spotting you because he doesn't even bother looking for you in the crowd, or him spotting you but not talking to you because you're not his choice for the night. Either way, he doesn't care. You know he doesn't but you wish you did. You thought you'd catch his attention with the black dress you're wearing. Or with the way your hair is styled. But it doesn't work and you tell yourself that it's okay. You always see him in your peripheral though, either talking to someone or flirting with that girl.
You decide to leave when you see Jungkook leaving as well, fingers tangled with the girl's. She looks like a giggling mess and you can't blame her. Everyone falls for Jungkook's charms. You try not to dwell on the fact that they're going to have sex.
It's Jimin who walks you home. He can tell you're sad so he talks about his day and his classes, avoiding Jungkook's name even though you're positive that they hung out today. Jungkook's intertwined in so many people's lives it's hard to leave him out. But Jimin makes an effort just to distract you. You're grateful for it though and he keeps up the act all the way to your apartment. He asks if he can use your bathroom and you say yes, mindlessly changing into your pajamas once the bathroom door closes behind you. You thought you'd have a little bit more time to finish changing but you suddenly hear Jimin swear behind you. You live in a little studio apartment so there's not much room to hide.
"Oh fuck— Shit," he says. You turn around laughing to see him with his hand over his eyes. "Sorry," he mumbles.
You're in your underwear but you don't mind. "It's not like you haven't seen me like this before," you chuckle.
"Still," he reasons.
Because you're stupid and heartbroken and hurt, you walk up to Jimin and gently grab his wrist, bringing his arm down to his side. You look at him looking at anywhere else but you. Eventually he looks down at your body for a split second and you laugh at him.
"We shouldn't," he whispers.
You shrug your shoulders. "Just a little bit of fun, right?" you ask with a smile on your face. "Like old times?" you giggle.
Jimin lets out a scoff but it's more of a laugh. Like he can't believe you're both doing this again. "You sure you're not drunk?" he asks as he makes eye contact with you. Bingo. You got him.
"Nope," you say sweetly.
"But Jungkook?"
You roll your eyes to mask the hurt. "Don't care."
Jimin looks at you intently to make sure you're not bluffing. While you wait for his answer you unclasp your bra and let it fall down your shoulders, exposing yourself to him. His eyes widen at the sight.
"Okay," he breathes out. He suddenly holds you by the waist to place you on the kitchen counter. It has you giggling at him.
"Eager?" you ask when he starts kissing your neck. You feel him drag his teeth across your skin, like he's thinking if he should mark you up or not. You stretch your neck out even more and feel him biting at your skin, sure to leave a bruise.
"Just excited," he mumbles against your neck. You feel him smile.
You unzip his pants while he's busy sucking your nipples. He's hard already when you start pumping your hand up and down his cock.
"Feels good, baby," he moans in your ear. You're still wearing your underwear but Jimin doesn't mind, just pushes it to the side to insert two of his fingers inside your pussy.
"Oh," you choke out. He finds your spot right away and rubs his fingers against it. He doesn't make you come, just fingers you to make sure you're prepped. It's quick when he takes his fingers out and grabs the condom in the back pocket of his jeans. You watch him tear the packet open and roll the condom down his length.
You both don't say anything else as he pushes his cock past your tight walls. Doesn't give you a moment before he starts pounding, his skin slapping against yours.
It's always like this with Jimin—just quick and easy and no feelings attached. You both don't do it much, it happens at the most random times. Usually when you want to forget or when he's stressed from school. And after this you're both back to being friends. It's never awkward. You wish it were like this with Jungkook instead.
"Jimin," you moan when he starts rubbing your clit. "Gonna come."
"Go ahead, baby," he breathes out, placing a soft kiss on your cheek and leaving his lips there. You push yourself to release and Jimin follows right after. You're both breathing heavily when he pulls out, taking off the condom and throwing it in the bin. He zips up his pants and starts looking for something on your bed. You're still trying to catch your breath when you feel a shirt being put over your head. Jimin's sweet like this—does aftercare in the most platonic way possible.
"There," he says after helping you wear the shirt he found. He doesn't know it belongs to Jungkook. You don't think he minds if he does though.
"Thank you," you say quietly and give him a small smile.
"Anytime. I'll see you around, okay?" He kisses your forehead and you watch him leave your apartment.
The silence engulfs you and you think you should feel disgusted with yourself—that you're pining over a guy but you just had sex with another. With his close friend out of all people. But you push the thought to the back of your mind as you jump down from the kitchen counter and walk into your bathroom. You're just like Jungkook, you tell yourself. Just casually sleeping around and nothing else. He doesn't care and you don't either. You feel a teeny bit better.
You take a warm shower to wash all the remnants from tonight. You actually take your time just to clear your jumbled up mind. It's almost 30 minutes later when you step out and check your phone while you're drying off, heartbeat stopping at a text you've received almost an hour ago.
jk: u up?
jk: hey reply to me :(
jk: coming over
Your eyes widen at the last text. It was sent just 10 minutes ago. You don't know where he's coming from but the campus isn't that big so he'll probably be here soon. You quickly finish drying off and change into comfortable clothes. You hear a knock on the door the moment you finish changing. You take a deep breath before walking to the door and opening it.
You notice Jungkook's wearing the same clothes from the party but his shirt is a bit wrinkled. You think he just came from the girl's place. Probably fucked her and is here now because he's not satisfied. You should feel disgusted and mad but you're not. You're no better. You just slept with his friend.
"Hi," you mutter.
He smiles at you and leans in to kiss you on the lips. "Hey, sweetheart." It has you swooning.
You step to the side to let him in and he walks straight to your bed, sitting down to take off his shoes before lying down comfortably. You follow him and sit down on your bed right by his waist. He stretches out his arm to drape it over your thighs and you start tracing his tattoos absentmindedly. This is your usual routine.
"Did you stay in all night?" he asks. Just a little bit of conversation before he does what he's really here for. At least he has a little bit of decency. You don't mind though, it makes you think that he cares about you when he asks things like this.
You shake your head and smile at him. "Nah, Jihyo and Mingyu dragged me to that frat party." You can tell he's trying to hide his surprise.
"Oh, I didn't see you there," he mumbles.
"It's okay." You shrug. "There were a lot of people."
"We could've played beer pong together, I know you like doing that every time you're out."
Your heart clenches at his remark. You're surprised and hurt every time he remembers little things about you. "I was with Jimin, don't worry." Jungkook doesn't know the double meaning to it.
He nods and runs his fingers across your thighs. "Missed you. Sorry I didn't reply to your text earlier, got caught up in something." You know that's a lie. "Just got back from the party too, that's why I came here late." Another lie.
You nod and smile as if you believe him. And you force yourself to because it's easier than knowing the truth. It's silent for a moment before he mumbles c'mere and brings you on top of his lap.
"Missed this," he says quietly as he squeezes your thighs. His hands trail up your waist till he's squeezing your tits beneath the shirt you're wearing. You start grinding on his cock, getting out of breath too quickly. You missed this too. It's been a week since you last had sex with Jungkook which is a long time for the both of you.
"Kook," you pant. He's pinching your nipples knowing that's where you're most sensitive.
"I know, sweetheart. Take your shirt off for me, hm?"
You nod your head dumbly and do as you're told, watching Jungkook stare at your body. He stops moving beneath you and you're about to ask what's wrong when he brings his hand up to touch the hickey on your neck that Jimin left.
"Who's this from?" he asks. You can't tell if he's mad or just curious. Jungkook isn't showing any emotions on his face and you're starting to get nervous.
"Just..." You think if you should tell him the truth. You look into his eyes and try to see if there's any semblance of care. You don't know. You really can't tell. Then your eyes trails down his body, to his neck and the wrinkly white shirt he's wearing. There's a red stain on the collar and you know it's lipstick. From the girl he slept with earlier. "Someone," you finally mumble.
"Someone?" He continues rubbing the spot gently until he presses down on it with his thumb. He doesn't press down too hard, but it's with enough force to have you hissing slightly.
"It's from Jimin," you finally say. He doesn't say anything but raise an eyebrow at your reply. You don't know if he already knows that you and Jimin have slept together. He doesn't look so surprised, or maybe he is and he's just really good at schooling his expressions.
He makes eye contact with you again and you feel his hand going to the back of your head, grabbing a handful of your hair to press your lips against his. The kiss feels urgent and rushed, his tongue instantly slipping in your mouth and tangling with yours. You're on top of him yet you feel defenseless as he holds you by your hair and kisses you hard. You let Jungkook do as he pleases and forget about the little conversation you just had. You start grinding on his cock again and he reciprocates this time, hips moving against yours.
Before you know it, he rolls you over and pins your arms above your head. You stare at him with wide eyes and he smirks at you in return. He holds your wrists with one hand and takes off your shorts and underwear with the other. He's fully dressed while you're not and you know you're at his mercy. He knows this too as he spreads your thighs apart with his hand.
"Keep your hands there," he whispers. You hold your bed frame for good measure. You just want to please him. He trails kisses down your body, from your neck to your nipples to your tummy. He stops by your thighs and you feel his breath against your skin. You squirm beneath Jungkook to get him to do something, to touch you and pleasure you. He shakes his head, still with that damn smirk on his face. He starts kissing your thighs, close to your pussy just to tease you.
"Didn't know you and Jimin have a thing going on," he says against your skin. You shiver at the vibrations his voice provides.
You feel Jungkook bite down on your inner thighs. "We don't," you choke out. He scoffs and starts kissing your pussy. Just light kisses that start making you crazy because you just want his mouth on you. "We're just friends," you say weakly.
He looks up from where he's laying between your legs. "Like us?"
Us.
You know what he means but at the same time you don't. You're friends with Jimin like you're friends with Jungkook. But you don't long for Jimin like you do for Jungkook. You don't yearn for Jimin the same way, don't look for him in every place you're at, don't pine for his affection or his touches. Jimin isn't like Jungkook and you both know that. You just don't know if you're different from the other girls Jungkook fucks.
"No," you say truthfully. It's said with defeat and desperation because you know he's not going to touch you till you answer him. "Not like us."
You know Jungkook won't pry anymore because he finally starts licking your pussy, starting with your outer lips until his tongue is inside your hole licking every crevice. Then he starts sucking your clit and that's when you truly lose it, legs going around his head to keep him against your cunt.
"Fuck," you almost scream. You're so close already that you should feel embarrassed but you're not. Jungkook knows your body too well. No one holds a candle to how good he eats you out. "Please," you whimper.
"Please what, sweetheart?"
"Please make me come!" you beg. "Need it, need it so much." You starting grinding your hips against his mouth.
"You're so desperate," he chuckles. It's said meanly but the comment flies over your head. You don't care anymore; you just want some sort of release. "But not yet."
You suddenly feel cold because Jungkook removes his mouth from you, standing up and getting out of the bed to remove his clothing. You continue holding the bed frame above you because you want to be good for him. You watch him strip his clothes off till he's naked just like you, tattooed hand wrapping around his cock.
It's long and thick and it splits you open every time he fucks you. You really don't know how you manage to take him every time.
Jungkook is so mean and unfair with the way he's teasing you right now, pleasuring himself while you lay on the bed. You're about to open your mouth to complain when he finally nods his head, motioning you to get up. "Kneel. Hands behind your back, okay?"
You nod your head and get in position on the bed, head tilting up to look at his cock. It's so hard and the tip is already leaking. You just want your mouth around him.
"Open," he says.
You open your mouth and stick your tongue out, just the way Jungkook likes. As expected, he spits directly into your mouth and you swallow right away.
"Good girl. Now suck."
He brings his cock to your lips and you immediately start sucking. You push your length all the way in till you feel him at the back of your throat.
"Gotta take all of me in, pretty. Or else I won't fuck your little pussy."
You know Jungkook takes his threats seriously so you back up a little to catch your breath before taking him in your mouth again. God, he's so big and thick your jaw is already starting to feel sore. But you power through and keep taking him in your mouth until your nose touches his tummy. You try not to gag around him but it's no use. You also feels your eyes tearing up.
Jungkook doesn't care you're struggling. In fact, he loves it because he's got that stupidly handsome smile on his face. He strokes your cheeks for a while and you try to even out your breathing.
"I wanna fuck your throat, sweetheart. Can you take it?" he asks sweetly.
You know it's a rhetorical question but you nod anyways, as much as you could with a dick down your throat.
"Let me in then."
You close your eyes and relax your throat even more. Jungkook holds your head then and pushes you towards him even deeper. You're helpless since your hands are behind your back. You gag again and start feeling lightheaded.
"There we go," he finally says once his whole length is in your mouth. You feel the tip down your throat. You're struggling so much but you try not to move. You just want to please him. "Gonna move now," he mumbles and starts moving his hips. You let him fuck your throat for God knows how long. You're full on crying when he stops and withdraws his length halfway out your mouth. You take the time to gasp for air and you even cough a little, head bowing down to regain your breathing. You faintly hear Jungkook laugh above you.
"I'm not yet done, love. Was just feeling nice enough to give you a little breather."
You nod your head and look up at him, mouth opening wide to let him know you're ready again.
"You just let me do whatever I want, huh?" he chuckles. You're not sure if he means something else but to you it does. You willingly let Jungkook do anything to you. Even if it results in heartbreak.
He stares at you for a while and spreads the spit and precum that's on your lips. "So messy." Then he's back to inserting his length inside your mouth. The glide is smoother this time since you're already prepped. "There we go," he groans out. He stays still and feels the imprint of his dick on your throat. "Look so pretty for me."
Jungkook starts moving again but thankfully his pace is slow this time. You're sure you'll have a sore throat by tomorrow.
"Keep your eyes open, okay? Wanna see you cry."
You look at him while he's fucking your mouth, looking at the way his cock moves in your throat. You're starting to lose your breath and you think Jungkook could tell as well because he grants you reprieve and steps back. You're coughing more this time, hands catching yourself in front of you. You barely get enough time to regain your breathing before you feel Jungkook grabbing your head and bringing your lips to his.
"Did so good for me," he says against your mouth.
You're trembling in his hold and you grab his arms to steady yourself. "Fuck me please," you try to say but your voice comes out hoarse and ragged.
He kisses your cheek and then your jaw. "I will, don't worry," he coos. "Always gonna give you what you want." Another lie. You know that's not true.
You're putty in his hands as he maneuvers you to the position he wants to fuck you in, which is on your hands and knees with your ass high in the air.
"Just like that," he whispers. He pushes down on your shoulders even more so that you're wide and open for him. He starts rubbing your pussy and you can't help but moan out loud. "You're so wet, sweetheart. All from sucking my cock?"
You nod wordlessly from your position on the bed. "Jungkook!" you scream as he plunges two fingers in your pussy. He's ruthless as he fucks his fingers fast and hard, hitting your g-spot right away. "Please," you cry out. You're so wound up and tense and you just want to come already but he won't let you.
You hear Jungkook chuckle from behind you. "Still so tight, baby. Thought Jimin stretched you out already." You're about to reply but you feel his thumb press against your rim and your senses go haywire, mind going blank because you're so overwhelmed.
"Please, please," you beg quietly. You're crying again and you'd do anything at this point to get Jungkook to fuck you. He withdraws his fingers from your holes and you hear the crinkling of plastic behind you. You turn your head slightly to see him slipping a condom on. Jungkook has never fucked you raw and you never asked why because you already know the answer. You'll get hurt hearing the truth anyway.
He holds your hips to steady you. He rubs the head of his cock up and down your folds. "You want this?" he asks roughly.
"Yes. Please."
Finally, finally, Jungkook pushes his cock in your pussy. It doesn't take long because you're so wet he slides right in to the hilt.
"You feel so good around me." He stills for a moment and you grab your ass to spread your cheeks even more.
"Please move, Kook."
You hear him groan. "God, baby, you're filthy." He starts fucking into you and your mind goes blank. You feel his thick cock slide in and out, the tip already kissing your cervix.
"Feels so good," you mumble incoherently. Jungkook fucks you quick and hard, holding your hips so tightly you know it's going to bruise. You feel his balls slap against your clit which adds even more pleasure. You feel yourself getting close again and arch your back.
"Can I please come?" you ask through your moans. "Please let me come, Jungkook. Please—"
"Come," he finally says. It's the only word you need to hear before you let go, that coil in you snapping and bringing pleasure all over your body. You don't know you're moaning so loudly you're almost screaming. You feel your pussy just gush and it gets so wet and sticky you're surprised Jungkook doesn't slip out. It's so filthy that you hear squelching noises as well. Your orgasm goes on for so long you don't know how you're still holding yourself up.
"You creamed my cock so much, baby," Jungkook says. He slows down his pace but he's still moving so you can ride out your high. "Got me wet and even your sheets."
You barely hear him and there's just a buzzing sound around your head. Your body feels so heavy and you just want to collapse but you arch your back even more for Jungkook.
He laughs. "Think I fucked you stupid." He increases his pace again and you just kneel there and take it. "Gonna make me fucking come," he growls as his hips snap against yours. "Fuck." He fucks you some more and you groan every time he hits your g-spot.
Suddenly, he pulls out so fast. "Don't move," he groans. You stay in place and watch him remove the condom off, hand going to stroke his cock as he brings himself to his release. You feel his come on you, right on your pussy and asshole. "Fuck, baby," he groans. You feel even stickier with his load on you. Then he bends down to kiss your neck, and then your cheek, and then a gentle one on your lips.
"You okay?" he asks quietly. His arm goes to wrap around your waist and you slowly start sinking onto the bed.
"Mhm," you mumble and try to keep your emotions at bay. You always feel so overwhelmed after sex with Jungkook. You let a few tears fall down your cheeks but it's the kind of tears of relief from an intense orgasm.
Jungkook presses his front against your back, not caring that his come is still on you. He starts kissing your face again then rubs his nose up and down your throat. "Just breathe, yeah?" he says quietly. You nod weakly against his hold and do just that. The both of you say nothing as you try to calm your racing heart.
You don't know how many minutes pass by until Jungkook stands up. You don't have the strength in you to move your position on the bed or ask where he's going. A few minutes later you feel a wet rag on your back. You let Jungkook clean you up while the both of you still don't say a thing. Then he's moving you on the bed again so your head is on the pillows and he's right behind you, lying down comfortably to be the big spoon. You feel him kissing your head.
"Sleep," he mumbles against your hair. With Jungkook holding you and with his steady breaths guiding yours, you fall asleep right away.
..••°°°°••..°°••....••°°..••°°°°••..
You don't know what time it is when you wake up but there's still sunlight peeking through your curtains so you suppose it's still morning. You turn to face the other side of the bed only to find it empty. You don't know what time Jungkook left, if he stayed the night or left the moment you fell asleep. You're used to it already but it doesn't mean you're not hurt. Your heart constricts at the empty space beside you. You move again to lay on your back and cover your face with yours hands, letting out shaky breaths while trying not to breakdown. God, maybe Jimin was right. Just forget about him.
But it's hard not to. It's hard to forget about him when you have sex constantly, when his touches are gentle but also rough. When he wants you to reply to his messages and when he wants you against his body. It's hard because he's friends with your friends. It's hard when he takes care of you after every intense orgasm. It's hard when he makes it seem like he wants you just as much as you want him.
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feminist-space · 6 months
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Article by Fortesa Latifi:
"Being the child of an influencer, Vanessa tells me, was the equivalent of having a full-time job—and then some. She remembers late nights in which the family recorded and rerecorded videos until her mother considered them perfect and days when creating content for the blog stretched into her homeschooling time. If she expressed her unease, she was told the family needed her. “It was like after this next campaign, maybe we could have more time to relax. And then it would never happen,” she says. She was around 10 years old when she realized her life was different from that of other children. When she went to other kids’ houses, she was surprised by how they lived. “I felt strange that they didn’t have to work on social media or blog posts, or constantly pose for pictures or videos,” she says. “I realized they didn’t have to worry about their family's financial situation or contribute to it.”
Vanessa, who requested anonymity to speak freely about her family dynamics, says she helped create content for huge companies like Huggies and Hasbro when her mom landed endorsement deals. When she reached puberty and began menstruating, her mother had her do sponsored posts for sanitary pads. “It was so mortifying,” she says. “I just felt like I wanted to crawl into a hole and never come out.”
Being part of an influencer family changed everything about her life, Vanessa says. “Sometimes I didn’t know where the separation was between what was real and what was curated for social media.” And her mother’s online presence indelibly warped their relationship. “Being an influencer kid turned my relationship with my mom into more of an employer-employee relationship than a parent-child one,” she says. “Once you cross the line from being family to being coworkers, you can’t really go back.”
...
Khanbalinov has had zero new offers since he took his kids offline. “When we were showing our kids, brands were rolling in left and right—clothing companies, apps, paper towel companies, food brands. They all wanted us to work with them,” he says. “Once we stopped, we reached out to the brands we had lined up and 99 percent of them dropped out because they wanted kids to showcase their products. And I fought back, like, you guys are a paper towel company—why do you need a kid selling your stuff?”
The law has woefully lagged behind the culture here, but there’s signs that policymakers might finally be catching up. In 2023, in addition to Illinois, three other states—New York, Washington State, and New Jersey—proposed bills to protect influencer kids. Contrast that with the flurry of legislative activity in just the first two months of 2024. Seven more states—Maryland, Georgia, Ohio, Missouri, California, Arizona, Minnesota—have introduced similar legislation. Some of the bills are going one step further to protect the privacy of the kids featured in this content. In some states, proposed legislation would include a clause that borrows from a European legal doctrine known as the “right to be forgotten”—it would allow someone who was featured in content when they were a child to request that platforms permanently delete those posts. None of the current legislation introduced, however, would outright bar the practice of featuring minors in monetized content.
...
The movement on this issue was glacial for years, but it finally feels like the ice has thawed. Much of that progress is thanks to activists like Cam Barrett (she/they), a 25-year-old creator (@softscorpio) who uses TikTok to talk about her experience of being overshared in their childhood and adolescence. Barrett doesn’t go by her legal name anymore because of the online history it’s tied to. “I love my legal name,” Barrett tells me. “I just don’t love the digital footprint attached to it.” Last year, Barrett testified in front of the Washington State legislature as a proponent of a bill to protect influencer kids. This year, they testified again—this time, in front of the Maryland legislature.
“As a former content kid myself, I know what it’s like to grow up with a digital footprint I never asked for,” Barrett told the Maryland House of Delegates Economic Matters Committee in February. “As my mom posted to the world my first-ever menstrual cycle, as she posted to the world the intimate details about me being adopted, her platform grew and I had no say in what was posted.” And yet, Cam says her activism has been healing.
For Cam and other influencer children, getting a paycheck won’t give them back what they lost—a normal childhood unobstructed by the cameras pushed into their faces. But it could be the beginning of some version of restitution. “My friends say I’m fighting for little Cam,” she tells me. “It feels very healing because I didn’t have anyone to fight for me as a kid.”"
Read the full article here: https://www.cosmopolitan.com/lifestyle/a60125272/sharenting-parenting-influencer-cost-children/
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astrobydalia · 2 years
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How you connect with others: 7th house and 8th house
work by astrobydalia
I do not consent this content being reposted on any another platform. I don’t own any of these pictures
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When talking about the 8th house in regards to relationships, the first thing that we think of is sex, however the 8th house rules sex because it is all about any type of deeper intimacy in any committed connection. Our 7th house tells us how we relate to others and what type of connections we like to establish with others but the 8th house can tell more about what you need in order to nurture and establish a deeper connection with someone. Of course many other things in the chart are very telling of how you connect with others such as Moon or Venus, but in this post I'll focus on the the 8th house which is all about going past that one-on-one interaction (7th house) to really let the other person in, which is why you may or may not be comfortable with your 8th house energy. This house is very telling of the type of energy you need in order to build trust and strong binding and also how you behave with the people you trust
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*Please note:
If you're using placidus and you find that you're in situation where for example you're a water ASC but your 8th house is ruled by water and not air just pay attention to the 7th house description of water asc and the 8th description of fire asc and so on. If your 7th and 8th house are ruled by the same sign for example Virgo, these descriptions still apply cause the following sign (Libra) will still occupy some of the 8th house but you could also relate to the earth 8th house description of air risings
Planets and the rest of the chart will give more nuance and layers to these energies
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Earth risings really want to get to know someone on a really deep level due to water DSC. They don't necessarily overshare (they very much can), but they are the ones who can get through to others, they're the type to want to make small talk vulnerable or deep right away and you will notice this with how easy it is for them to get through to others. They are very good listeners and can easily make people feel loved and appreciated even through a casual interaction. They do this because they want to know who someone is deep down so when intimacy comes they feel free enough to show their wilder, adventurous or even childish side without being judged since they have fire 8th house. They want to be pampered back and feel a little "selfish" and free and dominate the situation or their partner doing so. I like to think of it as they charm people in (water 7th house) so they can be adored (fire 8th house) but not in a malicious way of course. The type of dynamic they seek with people they trust always involves playfulness, spontaneity and will definitely be out the door if you judge their personality or ego in some way. If they don't trust you they will be able to stir you up emotionally without showing you their real personality which can result in them leading people on a lot. This does not mean they are fake but since they are earth risings, they are used to keeping it together all the time so they want to be able to let loose during intimacy. They are attracted to people who they find a little daring cause they are looking for someone who takes out their feisty side.
Virgo risings (Pisces 7th house, Aries 8th house) -> their way of making deeper connections is actually very child-like due to the dreaminess mixed with impulsiveness. They can get infatuated quite easily and want a partner that keeps them on their toes always longing. They commit passionately and blindly
Capricorn risings (Cancer 7th house, Leo 8th house) -> they want to feel cared for and pampered so admiration is a big factor here for what makes these natives want to connect more deeply. They are very attentive people and want a partner that respects them and always takes them into account
Taurus risings (Scorpio 7th house, Sagittarius 8th house) -> these people want to go all in in their connections in every aspect, no bs kinda vibe, specially when it comes to intimacy they want to be able to just go wild with their partner, explore the good and the ugly and simply have fun doing so
Fire risings prefer people who give them light-hearted and fun conversations which they genuinely find entertaining and interesting and they’re more open to interacting with all sorts of people due to air DSC. They are easily swayed by other's mind or surface-level charm, but they want to get to know the actual deeper personality of others, so these natives are actually more sentimental than what they may actually look in a casual interaction. Once they've been charmed by someone mentally, when it comes to intimacy they want to feel comfortable enough to show their deeper self and to know each other deeper due to water ruling 8th house. They're the type to want a relationship where you can talk about gossip and their trauma just as comfortably, but they won't trust someone they can only have surface level conversations with or someone who is inconsiderate with their emotional expression or disregards their deeper views of things. As fire risings, they are used to coming across as tough and confident but when it comes to intimacy they need to feel like there's always an open door for vulnerability and softness if they need it. If they don't trust you emotionally, they'll just enjoy having a casual mentally stimulating conversation and then move on, so it's easy for them to come across as charming to many people. They want a connection that has a fun and light-hearted dynamic but with a strong emotional bond underneath it all. These natives are the type to fall for charming and intelligent individuals that are 'softies' on the inside
Sagittarius risings (Gemini 7th house, Cancer 8th house) -> with this mix they definitely will get intimate with someone who says just the right things and verbally comforts them. They want a relationship where they can keep things youthful and emotionally soft with not much turmoil
Aries risings (Libra 7th house, Scorpio 8th house) -> these peeps are the epitome of charming, they want to connect with people that they relate to in some way but will accept and embrace their dark side and secrets, their way of making deep connections is by taking the person into their inner cave with them
Leo risings (Aquarius 7th house, Pisces 8th house) -> these natives have a habit of getting in problematic relationships and romanticizing them for it. They fall for unconventional or chaotic people and then have this "they don't understand that I see past that and I love you for your soul" sort of intimacy
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Air risings tend to surround themselves with people that provide them with brand new experiences, people who are entertaining, fun and independent due to their fire DSC. They always want to do new things with the people they like and come in contact with and they also like people who are 'their own person'. These natives are often very blunt and outspoken actually and it's not uncommon for them to be seen as rude, bold or nonchalant sometimes, but as much as they enjoy interacting with stimulating and bold people, when it comes to intimacy and a deeper connection they desire stability and reliability due to earth ruling their 8th house. Basically they won't commit to and specially won't trust someone who is fun but lacks consistency and dependability. Deep down they themselves are very reliable, but they reserve that side of themselves for the people they love and trust, therefore they will commit to a partner that will reciprocate this type of energy. They are very fun people to be around and they're usually rather popular, but once they trust you they will show a more serious and respectful side to them. They will want to connect with people who are independent and stimulating but deep down is chill, low-key and reliable underneath it all. When it comes to deep intimacy they will feel like it's safe to trust someone who shows patience and consistency even if it's not too emotional or fiery. Being air risings, they're very mental normally, so they will like to commit and give themselves to someone that grounds them
Libra risings (Aries 7th house, Taurus 8th house) -> they like spontaneity and indulgence. They are drawn to people who they find immediately attractive and catches their eye, but they like to connect deeply with someone by sharing strong sensuality and calmness that goes beyond a first-time thrill
Aquarius risings (Leo 7th house, Virgo 8th house) -> they love to connect with people who have golden retriever vibe to them and is very loyal and helpful. They will connect deeply with someone by lighting up their day with lots of fun and laughter but also by casually being always there if they need anything
Gemini risings (Sagittarius 7th house, Capricorn 8th house) -> these people love connecting with individuals that bring expansion into their life and will connect deeply with others by giving them some authority. If these people trust you, they will secretly take what you say very seriously
Water risings are quite charming, but they're the type to draw people in while keeping a respectful distance with them. They don't mind being approached but they definitely don't like when people get too close too soon cause they like the process of building a connection. They usually come across as a little serious and stiff when interacting with others and it's not rare for them to keep their social circle small or always interact with the exact same people. This is because they take relationships seriously and like consistency and predictability in their connections and interactions, but when intimacy comes they want to trust someone enough to freely detach due to air ruling the 8th house. They won't commit to someone who is reliable but boring and uninteresting. Being water risings, they are constantly very perceptive of the energies around them, so when it comes to intimacy they will feel very good with someone who they can just take it easy and have a more light-hearted energy. Ironically, these are the most distant and detached risings when it comes to connections and intimacy, but this does not mean they don't love deeply. In fact, this "let's just say, do and talk about whatever, it doesn't matter" side is one they reserve for people who they really trust, that's why they can be dry towards other people who they don't find interesting. These natives usually fall for people who they have to "figure out" in some way sort of like "oh you're reliable and consistant (earth dsc) but I can tell (water asc) that there's more to you and I wanna know more (air 8th house)"
Scorpio risings (Taurus 7th house, Gemini 8th house) -> they definitely want physical attraction paired with some mental thrill so it's common for them to fall for players or be players themselves. They will connect deeply with someone who they can share physical and mental chemistry all in one
Pisces risings (Virgo 7th house, Libra 8th house) -> these natives are naturally very helpful and thoughtful, but they know how to keep to themselves and not give too much. That's why when they connect deeply with someone they're the type to want to share every single with the other person
Cancer risings (Capricorn 7th house, Aquarius 8th house) -> with this double Saturn influence, these natives are the most serious and selective about all their connections, they will feel very connected to someone that gives them a traditional commitment while also opening their minds to new and odd things
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rzyraffek · 1 year
Text
Slashers with y/n that just gets along with everything
Like slasher could litteraly kill somone near y/n and she would be like alr alr whats really important is that you are happy🤠😎. Im sorry that first 2character had super long headcanons while last ones have way less :( I had no ideas Request open!
Billy Lenz
He always expects some sort of negative response when he calls people and when he heard new voice on the Phone he got even more exited cuz new person new reaction! He totally didnt expect her to just go "yeah yeah sure buddy, anyways... how is your day man? Cuz im so so tired...*starts normal converstation*
He probably tries to stay in character but he is so caught of Guard he doesnt know how to react really (hehe the table has turn)
Now he kinda hopes that she will pick up cuz shes very intresting😈 billy likey
"Ew its this creep again! He is asking for you y/n? Of please dont tell me you befriended him??" "So what? He said hes favourite fruit is strawberry he cant be that bad!" *billy saying slurs on the phone*
You need to constantly tell him that, no Billy no harrasing women isnt sexy, you arent quirky, you are mentally ill
"Y/n i killed that bitch that was gossiping about you 🧍 " "👍good for you billy im glad you found healthy way to cope with that negative emotion😇" "on god"
His whole moral compass is created around the simple question 'does it hurt y/n?' .1:no it doesnt so feel free to do it .2 do not do it, she will ban Billy from sweets (bad ending)
The man from hush
This guy. This dude. This Little gremlin. He is upset that he gets no reaction! Like please oh please act all angy when he 'acidently' shot tire in her car! But oh no ofc no, she had to be like "oh its okay honey i have backup in garage🥰" hes like HHUH SINCE WHEN WE HAVE GARAGE
Like tbh thats how i imagine how they met: he saw her, he wanted to hunt her, she was so chill that she didnt even leave her household while the power was off and he went inside and just saw her having lil nap on couch. 🧍🤨erm exuse me gurl im trying to roleplay epic hunter here tf
He probably kidnaped her cuz she was too weird to just kill her but he didnt want to risk her calling police. He probably tied her up and yeeted her on backseats. And then she begun judging music on the radio"yo big guy can i get some good music taste?" "What? Whats wrong with Taylor Swift?"
He will overshare everything to kinda check where is her limit if it comes to being chill "yeah so i killed this old lady.." "im sure you had good reason🥰" "🤨... anyways... yeah so i was drinking some redbull when some guy said i look ugly so i shoot his head off and-" "HEY HEY hold up geez you CANT drink Energy drinks?? Bestie you know it is unhealthy?? Also you like hunt for sport it will ruin your condition!? How you gonna shoot people with shakey hands?? You crazy or something?" "Damn😔"
Micheal myers
I tried to put him here but i realised he will be as chill as her.
Like he can give her gifts covered in blood and she' just going to clean it and wear it like nothing happened or completley ignore it
He cares about this stuff as much as y/n so like not at all. I mean tbh theres is a bit of difrence: shes at least positive about it! Like "yeah micheal go for it, love🥰😇 i know its hard to cope with trauma take it all out alr?" Shes trying to be a good supporting gf not her fault she never had serial killer bf!
Brahms Heelshire
He lives for attention! What do you mean the war crime he commited this lunch break is okay!?!? Baby pleasee
But this negativity disapears the moment he realised he can get a lot of positive attention when he will do some nice stuff! "Oh honey I didnt kill any rats today" "oh that's amazing brahms I'm sure you and the rats inside walls will get along well soon🥰" (rats in walls bully brahms)
Please complement him or he will get a tantrum and destroy something
Brahms and rats have very hard past i might do seperate hc about that
Ghostface
"Look babe! My newest victim *shows photo*" "ugh baby...😰 you NEED to buy new camera or watch some youtube tutorials about how to take good photos" "aw man whats wrong with my pictures 😔"
Otherwise y/n supports his hobbies! People need to grow😇 (and he needs to grow up)
If theres 2ghostfaces(like in most movies) they will bet money on how long you gonna keep this 'do whatever as long as youre happy' act. Well they didnt know that this wasnt an act but her personality
Also they will probably try to use this chillnes aginst her like "oooh y/n something terrible happened! I crushed my car oh what will i do!" "Alr bestie i will drive you over there😇" "😈omg you are so nice i totally didnt expect that(heheh i dont need to pay for gas today (hes very evil))
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angsthology · 9 months
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“oh, god, no...” — or an alt title: three people bonding over random things as alex makes a horrible decision
one of his worst ideas ever. he’s never doing it ever again.
a/n ckckckckcck i love u dino anon but i was a bit stumped on where this could go BUT i give u surprise to make it more fun i love love love alex my i wanna say pookie but i cant take that word seriously. also im guilty of oversharing roolore in these suposedly shorter chapters. and now that im realizing things this kinda suck lawl
THE KANGAROO(KIE) VS. THE WORLD
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after a long day of media, roo was finally free to do whatever she pleased (that being going back to her hotel and pass out until whatever time her body wakes up). currently, she’s slipping on her backpack and taking her phone out, scrolling mindlessly on her contacts until she found the right name.
“where the hell are you?” she starts, holding her phone to her face. “alright. you wanna watch a movie ‘til we pass out?” she paused waiting for an answer as she walks out of the building, “‘kay, i’ll meet you out front.”
just as she clicked her phone off, she looked up to be met with a face that just… stood there with a smile—making her jump and scream in surprise, catching the attention of people around.
when she collected all her life (that had been scattered when she got spooked) she took notice of the source of her heart-attack. he smiled innocently still, as if he’s done nothing wrong.
“WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!”
alex, the culprit in question didn’t falter (though he did flinch a little bit at her outburst), he saw this one coming and to be quite frank, he did this to himself.
“i deserved that.” he closed his eyes in acceptance of defeat. alas, he brushed it off, he moved to her side and slung a hand around her shoulder. she was about to shrug him off but decided against it. “how would you feel about helping me pick my next hair color?”
that piqued her interest, she finally looks up to come face-to-face with him again, though now a smile graced her face like a cheshire cat.
his face fell. he was starting to slowly regret his decision.
without another word, a large grin still etching her face, she fished her phone out of her pocket and started scrolling through something. when alex tried to take a peek, she immediately moved away to prevent him from doing so mumbling something along the lines of ‘corporate secrets’.
he made a face at her words. but when she finally showed him her screen, he felt as if the face he made before was a bit premature.
“what the hell is that?!” he exclaimed.
she moved her phone so she could see the picture for herself seeing not what she had opened before but rather a video instead, “oh, sorry, this was from my pitbull concert. he’s great, isn’t he?” she happily showed him the video again.
he gave her another face.
“right, uh, here.” she showed him the correct picture.
he paused. “…what is that supposed to be?”
looking at the picture again, she took a second to think about it then shrug, “neon green/yellow-ish, give or take.”
his mouth drops at her direction. “what do you mean?”
“what do you mean, ‘what do i mean’?” she takes a look at his shocked face then decided to continue, “i mean: neon green/yellow-ish!” pausing, thinking back her words, “give or take!” she pauses again and re-clarified much calmer, “okay, maybe a bit more faded and muted.”
he shook his head, non-verbally ending that part of the discussion.
“where are we even going to get that kind of color?”
she shrugs, “i know a guy.”
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the two girls were now currently sitting on the couch, the doberman peacefully laying between them—her eyes too, like theirs, glued to the television playing jurassic park when suddenly a knock came, shifting all three of the girls’ attention towards it.
roo was about to get up to check who it was. being who she was, she had to be extra careful who to let into her living quarters.
“it’s me!” the other side announced.
she looked away from the door and blinked, her brows screwing together in thought until she realized who that voice belonged to.
“alex?” she tested the waters.
“yeah!”
she sighed, her eyes then looking expectantly at the dog that lied beside her, tilting her head as if she were the dog asking their owner for something.
the dog whimpers as if groaning at her request. alas, she jumped off the couch begrudgingly walking towards the door and jumping up to open it.
“he— huh?” alex stopped in his tracks when instead of seeing his friend right behind the door, she was way far sitting on the couch with her friend. she greeted him nonetheless then motioning her hand towards the dog that sat quaintly besides the door, smiling up at him happily.
“oh!” he raised his brows in surprise then bending down to pet the dog who happily accepted, “who’s this fella?” he asked in a high-pitched voice, his accent stronger than usual.
“that’s jet, she’s mine.” roo answered from the couch, jurassic park long forgotten. “what are you doing here?” she asked the brit.
alex then moved his attention away from the dog, his hand still petting her chin, “uhm—i need your help.”
“with what?” her voice slightly gurgling from taking a sip of her drink.
he then holds up the boxes of hair dye with a forced awkward smile.
she gave him a look, “what about your girlfriend?”
“busy today,” he shrugged.
“then do it tomorrow.” she counters.
“okay, fine, i’m bored and alone.” he confessed.
she wanted to help; she really did but—
she groaned loudly; head thrown back to rest on the back of the couch.
“would you believe me if i say my ass is glued and have already morphed into this couch?”
“i would, actually.”
suddenly, from far behind on the other side of the couch—her presence almost forgotten—nika made herself present, “i’ll help. my ass is getting tired of the couch and i’m pretty good with handling people’s hair; i actually spent a summer working in my mom’s salon once.”
roo the gasped, turning around to face her friend with her jaw slack in shock—sarcasm written all over her face—“you had a job? like an actual job? once upon a time?”
“oh shut the fuck up,” she waved off the racing driver and stood up from her seat on the couch over to the other. “now get up, let’s do this.”
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about a half an hour into their attempt, nika and alex had set up a mini salon chair using one of the hotel’s dining table chairs with a layer of plastic sitting on the ground. the latter sat on a chair in the middle of the room with a cloth draped over the top of his body. if anyone were to come in through the front door right now, they would assume kidnapping with a side of chemical testing. nika herself had changed into one of her uglier shirts incase they would accidentally get some dye on it.
the alfa romeo driver, on the other hand, still sat where she was the entire time unmoving and un-helping, now having the large dog sat on her lap feeding treats off of her hand while the other scratches the dog between her ears.
“alright. i think that’s all of your hair.” the girl stepped back from her friend’s friend’s hair, admiring the work she’s done. “now we wait. —good luck al,” she said as she took off the plastic gloves that were now mostly green.
alex—whose chair was facing the door for some reason—gripped the chair with his two (clean) hands and moved it around along with himself so he can face the couch. “so…” he looked between his co-worker and her friend, “does she just… go everywhere with you?”
“yeah.” she answered shortly before continuing, “you guys have wags i have… this.”
he looked at nika again, “no offense to you, but—”
“it’s fine, have you met her?” she shrugged pointing at the little shit she unfortunately calls a friend.
he chuckled then continued, “what about daisy-mae? i thought she was your best friend?”
“she is. this one’s just fit baggage claim. plus—daisy’s a serious scholar she’s still very busy getting her degree.”
from the kitchen sink, nika scoffed, “yeah, while she’s stuck with me around the world, mae’s stuck with atticus in college.”
alex the jumped into the conversation at the familiar name, “oh! the drummer, right?”
“yes.”
“oh—hey,” nika turned around from the sink and walked to the closest counter to the two friends, “there’s still quite some left, who wants it?”
as if sensing an idea in the air, jet jumps off roo’s lap and ran into another room.
said girl sighs, “man, knew jet was too smart for trips like this. should’ve known i should’ve brought bennie instead.”
as if the dog heard her, a bark came from the other room.
“whatever. i guess that’s one option out the window,” she turns to nika over the counter, “do me!” she smiles happily.
“alright. your death wish.”
alex, who was momentarily smiling, dropped his previous expression, “wait what—”
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te1enoviyuhs
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liked by daisymaerose, selvnika, and 836,735 others
tagged: selvnika and lilymhe
te1enoviyuh some notes from yours truly:
lilymhe why did u have to dump babysitting duties
and gooddyeyoung thank u for the hair dye i love hayley williams 🥰
and uh i guess awstenknight thanks for the hookup and free dye
and to everyone else!!!! hey. dump acc just dropped
see all 836 comments.
backbiteroo WHO LET YOU DO THIS
te1enoviyuh backbiteroo myself. i am a grown woman.
selvnika the nika salon is now open for business 🥰
te1enoviyuh selvnika i hope you bankrupt and close
selvnika te1enoviyuh kiss yourself.
norrislftv selvnika ??????
norrislftv OH
alex_albon why was i not tagged 😕 i thought we were twins now
te1enoviyuh alex_albon hm. sure. u wish
daisymaerose hi jet
liked by te1enoviyuh
gaslytv what does... alex mean... when he said... twins...
schupastry this is so random but so cute
awstenknight youre welcome grinch
te1enoviyuh awstenknight 🖕
lilymhe 😬😬 i apologize for having a job
te1enoviyuh lilymhe don’t apologize for that. apologize for not taking ur kid to work.
lilymhe te1enoviyuh that i won’t apologize for.
50kidgaroos BABE WAKE UP NEW DUMP ACCOUNT JUST DROPPED
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taglist; @treehouse-mouse @disneyprincemuke @yansbolobao @leilanixx @judespoision @vellicora @bborra
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sibylsleaves · 5 months
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Ok since you talked about conflict: what do you think their arguments will look like!!! (The first one and then perhaps the ones after)
oh i do believe their first fight is messy af!!! Because I think the only time we really have seen conflict between them has been during the Lawsuit era, which was so long ago and relatively early in their relationship, and then like little hints of it in s5 (in 5x01 with the panic attack stuff, and kind of in 5x10 with Eddie basically shutting Buck down about coming back to the 118).
And I think fundamentally they would HATE arguing. Like they are ALWAYS on the same team and I think it would be excruciating for both of them to be at odds with one another, so I think even a relatively small disagreement about something could easily blow up into something way bigger because one, or most likely BOTH, of them try to bury it and ignore it and pretend everything's fine because how can they not be on the same side about something??? and then when they refuse to address it it just gets bigger and bigger and their first fight is like...this kind of catastrophic explosion.
(omg sorry putting the rest under a readmore because this got so long...)
Like not screaming at each other or anything like that, but like their argument gets out of hand and one or both of them have to remove themselves from the situation and a little part of them is like is this it? is this where it ends? what if we really weren't ever meant to get together what if we really were better as friends? We NEVER fought when we were just best friends maybe this is too much for us...and then they get some Wise Perspective from someone or they have a classic Call That Mirrors Our Current Conflict moment and they're like wait. we're being stupid. yeah maybe we're fighting right now but we also both want to fight FOR each other and FOR this relationship.
I do think one of their early if not their earliest fights might be something about Eddie keeping something from Buck--not something nefarious at all, but something where it's Eddie basically processing or refusing to process something and not letting Buck in on the processing/lack thereof and Buck finds out and gets upset because when Eddie keeps things from him BAD THINGS HAPPEN. And Buck LOVES to fix things and Eddie loves that he wants to (comes in handy when you've got a bunch of holes in your walls...) but also he doesn't want to admit that there's anything TO fix and also, maybe this isn't something that can just be FIXED.
Just spitballing but maybe it's that Eddie is avoiding telling his parents about Buck and it's not that Buck needs him to do that but that Eddie is HIDING the fact that he hasn't told his parents FROM Buck because he doesn't want to admit how scary it is to come out to them and also to possibly open up this relationship (that he feels SO sure of and SO happy in) to the judgement of his parents who, for all the progress they've made HAVE proven themselves to be judgmental in the past. And Eddie thinks Buck is going to be hurt and disappointed that he hasn't told his parents but Buck is just hurt and sad that Eddie hasn't shared his feelings about the situation with Buck. (This also fits into my desire to see the friction of like, here's something i would've shared with you without question before we got together but now we ARE together and you are the SUBJECT of the thing I would previously have been sharing with you as like a friend/third party to the situation). Cue the Diaz parents showing up unexpectedly for a surprise visit and it all goes to hell. and i for sure think their future arguments get messy not just for them but also for the entire firehouse. because you know who loves oversharing about their relationship problems at work??? BUCK. and you know who hates talking about his problems and wants to pretend they don't exit? EDDIE "I don't panic" DIAZ. So I do think their little tiffs tend to bleed out and affect everyone on the team (but important to note I don't think they let it affect them on calls, it's more just a general disruption of the Team Vibe like in the truck/at the station because they can't stop sniping at each other). Like I think we'd see something very similar to how pissy Buck was with Eddie in 5x01 and Eddie being like BUCK FOR GODS SAKE and Hen and Chim are like 🍿🍿🍿 and Ravi is like. traumatized because everytime Buck is upset with Eddie somehow HE gets punished for it. and maybe even Chim and Maddie end up in their own argument because they disagree about who is in the wrong in the Eddie/Buck conflict (who is siding with whom...now that's the real question...but for the record in my head Chim is on Buck's side and he is FLABBERGHASTED that Maddie wouldn't take her own brother's side!!! But Maddie and Eddie are so similar so she REALLY empathizes with him in this situation and also she's ALWAYS primed and ready to call Buck out for being a dumbass.) I could see this being played for laughs and/or also as part of a larger conflict about Buck and Eddie being allowed to work together on the same shift. Like maybe it's kind of played somewhat comedically at first and then they like, resolve their fight in some cute way but Bobby still sits them down and is like you have GOT to figure out how to fight as a couple without dragging us all into it. Or you can't work together anymore. I'm so serious.
And Buck and Eddie are like what are you talking about we're all good now!! we love each other everything's great! And Bobby is like *stares directly at the camera* oh so you're never going to have another conflict again for the rest of your lives?
And then Buck starts thinking about how HES GONNA SPEND THE REST OF HIS LIFE WITH EDDIE AND HOW AMAZING IS THAT--sorry I'm getting distracted.
But anyway. Yeah. I think it's a process and they have to actually sit down together and figure out how they're going to handle conflict going forward because as much as they love each other and as much as it KILLS THEM to fight, no relationship is perfect at all times, even theirs.
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fhrlclln · 2 years
Note
i think we need a part two to the rockstar! eddie x wife! reader, possibly where it left off but this time they’re gonna make a baby? ;)
rockstar! eddie x wife! reader
i absolutely adored writing this! the much needed part 2 is here!! here’s part 1
nsfw/smut under the cut
。・:*˚:✧。
this time in the munson household…
“the best sex i had?” eddie asks confusingly as the camera crew nodded, zooming into his face as he sat by the pool, cigar in hand and whiskey by his side. shirtless, tattoos covering his chest while his mullet was tied in a low ponytail. the scent of chlorine filling his nostrils as he relaxes himself after such a tiring week of non-stop music making for the next corroded coffin album and taking extra care of you nowadays. these past months being so hectic on the both of you. it was refreshing to get a weeks worth of stay at home vacation.
“thought i’d said that already. any sex with my fucking wife, man.” he shrugs, bored at such plain question. the camera man only says they know that but in specific detail.
“oh, you all are getting nosy as shit.” he scoffs and laughs at it as he blows out a smoke. he leans back on the chair, sighing as he smiles at it, every memory him making sweet love to you in his mind but one always sticks to him to this day. quite recently it was as well.
“well the best fucking sex is when you’re really determined. don’t wanna overshare but getting your wife pregnant is the best sex, you horny fucks.” he says, taking in the sun, smirking as he remembers it so vividly that he could get an hard-on shamelessly in front of the camera. not that his fans hadn’t seen it countlessly when you’re around the show.
it was after that filming when you told him about your desire of a little munson running around the big mansion. it never left his mind that you wanted a family with him. i mean, of course it was bound to happen. but he never felt so blessed that you’d want a kid with him, never in his life he’d imagine being a father. his dad was an asshole, he expected much he could turn like his dad but he vowed to never think of that way. he had you, he loves you, and he will do everything to get what you want.
and he’ll get you a fucking kid.
“you’d really wanna have little me’s and you’s, sweetheart?” he wraps his arms around your waist, hands resting on your belly as you perfume hit his nose making him sigh tiredly. you nodded, eyes focused on the eggs you were frying and the pancakes you were flipping as well as the crisp bacon cooking. felt like heaven to him right now.
“of course i do, eds.” you answered as he kissed your neck. “you think i wouldn’t?”
“well, i don’t fucking know, thought that this wouldn’t cross your mind since we’re so busy all the time that we wouldn’t have the capacity.” he counters, knowing you were also busy with keeping up your image. magazines, photo shoots, modeling and all for the fans. which he currently despises how his own fans are horny fuckers for you. you were basically a 90’s it girl now, rockstar wife that he’s so lucky to be with.
“oh, eddie.” you turned around, facing him as you wrap your arms around his neck. kissing his lips as he squeezes your ass. “having kids with you has always been on my mind since we married.”
“really?”
“mhm.” you nodded, kissing him again, slow and tender, no screaming or fighting, just pure bliss of the sweet moment. eddie melts tasting your strawberry glossed lips, his hand roamed up and down at the expanse of your lower back. your sundress so sheer that he could feel your skin. fueling his desire further.
“we could get started now, ey?” he teases, nibbling your lower lip as you let out a quiet moan when he descend down to kiss your neck, enticing you.
“but breakfast, eddie.” you whined, scolding him.
“but that’s what you want right now, isn’t it? me topping you up with my cum ‘til you get so round with my child.” he breaths out, pressing his covered bulge to your stomach. his black boxer shorts feeling tight around his crotch. you sighed at him, the damn man had a knack way of his words to get you riled up. honestly, you weren’t complaining but it was so hard to say no to him sometimes.
“eddie…”
“you’ll be fucking glowing as ever. i’ll take care of you the whole shitty 9 months, fuck you real good.” he smirks, lifting your sundress up until his hand met with your bare ass. you grew accustom to not wear panties most of the time, easy access it is for you.
“fuck you, i w-wanted to make breakfast— oh!” you gasped when he lifts you up by your waist, shutting the stoves quickly as he circles to place you gently on the marble counter of the kitchen. he grins boyishly making your heart thump remembering your highschool days with him. he still looks the same back then.
“fine.” you sigh at him as he greedily hikes up your sundress to reveal your glistening pussy. “but you better get me pregnant, munson. or else.”
“ooh, i’ll fill you up in no time.” he promises, shoving his boxers down. he was about to do his usual foreplay but you stopped him by his wrist. he looks up, feeling puzzled by your intrusion.
“just want it now, please.” you pleaded as he chuckles at that.
“you on the pill?” he asks warily.
“nope.” you answer, wiggling your hips to seduce him further as he pumps himself first, precum glistening the head as you eyed it hungrily, spreading your legs wider as he positions himself to your entrance. rubbing the tip of his cock on your clit for moisture as you breathlessly moaned at the pleasant feeling.
“fuck.” he breaths out as he pushes in, determined to make your wish come true. he sinks in blissfully, the heat of your cunt coating him with such ease. no matter how many times he gets to slide into you, it never tires him out how you were made for him. your cunt was made for his cock. bottoming out, you wrap your arms around his broad shoulders, letting out a mewl as he starts pumping in and out. teasing you relentlessly.
“put a baby in me, munson. pleaseee…” you begged, salivating at the thought of his cum in you. you wanted this as much as him. you wanted it so bad for so long, now was the time he has to give it to you.
“i will, baby. i will.” he promises, snapping his hips suddenly in such vigor that made you squirm and grip his shoulders hard. he pounds into you, every snap of his hips a promise that he’s fulfilling. so determined to get you knock up in the moment. you gasped, shuddered, moaned at every move his cock rubs inside you raw. you loved it, loved the look on his face. so serious as he kisses your now bare chest as you shove it down for him.
“these fucking breasts gonna swell up soon.” he groans, burying his face as he moves his head side to side, loving the feeling of your soft breasts on his face. you giggled as he grips your hips hard, fucking you with no will to stop. the kitchen is filled with the lewdness of wet skin slapping, groans and moans and breathless whispers of curses.
“gonna..” eddie starts, kissing you hard, tongue and all. “make you a mama, huh. gonna make you a mama. you like that?” he practically growls against your lips, feeling his release near seeing you mercilessly take in his brutal pace as you rubbed your swollen clit.
“yes, yes, yes— fuck! please, eddie!” you begged, eyes watering as he buried his face in the crook of your neck. one sharp thrust had you shuddering as the coil in your stomach exploded making you clamp hard around him.
“shit—“ eddie moans out, bottoming in to the hilt as he fills you up with spurts of his release. your wet walls clamping down on him hard as he grinds in as you sobbed at such wonderful feeling inside of you. he sighs, slumping a bit as the grip on his shoulder lessened, making you slump back against his chest tiredly.
“filled you up good, sweetheart?” he asks breathlessly, cupping your cheeks as he kisses your lips softly for the rough fucking.
“yeah.” you shakily nodded, feeling blissed out as ever. eddie smirks, rubbing your stomach, feeling a little giddy he’s gonna see it round and plump soon.
“now we wait.” he smiles making you smile tiredly. breakfast out of your mind.
and back to the present…
“that fucking sex was the best out of all, you horny shits.” he breathed out, done reminiscing about it. “i’m starting to fucking think you all just wanna hear how me and my wife fuck.” he chuckles, the camera man zooms out as you suddenly appeared with heat in your steps.
“eddie!” you sniffled, eddie immediately sits up, facing the teary eyed heavily pregnant you.
“baby! what happened?” he asks worriedly seeing you cry as you sat on his lap, burying your face in his neck as you held something in your hands. “did something go wrong, sweetheart? did you get hurt or is it the baby—“
“my shoes!” you sniffled. eddie waits as he caresses your back, knowing how sore you are from carrying the little rascal growing in your stomach. the whole media went crazy when they first found out you were 5 months pregnant after making a public view to the world. eddie was above happy everyone got to know about the munson family starting to expand.
“what about your shoes, baby?” he asks curiously as you shake your head, tossing the heels into the pool. he ignores those as you grumbled. emotion shifting.
“they don’t fucking fit me anymore and i don’t know why! my fucking stomach is already in the way, i couldn’t bend down and now my shoes don’t fit!” you sobbed as the camera man moves away from the scene as eddie gestured for privacy. he licks his lips to himself, knowing those damn hormones are poking at you for the past 8 months. he kisses your forehead as he wipes away your tears. a determination in his eyes, wanting you to feel relax as ever, knowing your literally carrying his child. he’s literally at your beck and call these few months.
“sweetheart, i’ll buy you another pair. don’t you fucking worry.”
。・:*˚:✧。
i love me husband rockstar eddie 🥹
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auras-moonstone · 1 year
Text
mad woman — ethan landry (part two)
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word count: 839
summary: ethan and y/n talk about their deceased siblings and begin to bond.
pairing: gf!ethan landry x gf!fem!reader
based on: mad woman by taylor swift
previous part ; next part
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SURPRISINGLY, BAILEY LET HER JOIN THE PLAN. It didn’t take a lot of convincing on Ethan’s part, they all suffered the loss of a loved one, so they knew the thirst for revenge Y/N must be feeling.
“I’m sorry you have to go through that… being close to the person that killed your sister must be tough, kid” Bailey said, putting a hand on her shoulder.
“It is, but I know that this pain is worth it. We are going to make them regret taking them away from us”
“Well said” Quinn spoke, and Y/N sent her a smile. “We should head back to the dorm”.
“Sure. Thanks for everything, Mr. Kirsch” Y/N said with a warm smile.
“You are welcome anytime” he replied.
“Bye, dad” the Kirsch siblings said in unison as they left their dad’s home.
“You two go, I have other plans” Quinn told them.
“Paul?” Y/N asked with a playful smile.
“God, no. That is over, this one is called Lorenzo” the red head informed.
“Uh, Lorenzo. I like it, have fun” the girl waved at her roommate.
“You too, but if you have too much fun please don’t tell me” the girl’s voice distorted as she walked away, but they were still able to hear her.
Ethan’s blood rushed into his cheeks “Sometimes she speaks too freely”.
“You say that now, but if…” she stopped herself from going further and killing the mood “Sorry”.
“Hey, no. It’s okay, you can talk to me, you know?”
Ethan and her weren’t close at all. This new alliance brought them closer, yes, but the word ‘friend’ was still a bit too big for their relationship. However, he was the closest person she had at the moment, it had been so long since the last time she talked to someone without having to fake or hide emotions, that she just gave in.
“I miss her, a lot” she grimaced. Vulnerability was not something she was accustomed to show. “I don’t have the luxury of having other siblings, and even if I did, what I had with Amber was something unique. All the things that once bothered me about her, are the ones I now miss. I would give everything to hear her awful rap playlist that I absolutely loathe, or the loud and tiring parties she hosted despite knowing how uncomfortable I felt at them, and god I even miss her talking my ear off about that awful horror movie franchise she adored”.
“She sounds just like my brother” he sighed. “It’s nice that you had a nice relationship with her”.
“You weren’t close to Richie?” she asked.
Ethan shook his head “No. Our age difference, our different taste in things, we just never connected that much. And…”
“Yeah?” she encouraged him.
“I guess part of me has always resented him” he confessed, there was a trace of guiltiness in his statement.
“Can I ask why?” Y/N asked carefully.
“He was my dad’s golden boy. You know when kids asked their parents which child is their favourite and they say they love them all equally, even though it’s not true, as to not hurt their feelings?”
“Yes” she said unsure.
“Well, my dad wasn’t like that. He favoured Richie and admitted it proudly. And Quinn, being the only girl, also has a special place in his heart. His little girl, you know? And I am just there”
“Ethan…”
“I’m not saying he doesn’t love me, ‘cause I know he does, but Richie is gone, and I’m here and that disappoints him a bit” he had his eyes glued to the pavement, not daring to look her in the eyes. And Y/N wanted to throw up, cry and hug him at the same time. “Sorry. I overshared, right?” he tried to laugh it off.
“How long have you been bottling that up?” she asked softly.
“The resentment? My whole life. The thought of my father being disappointed I wasn’t the one who died? For a year” he replied.
The vulnerable environment encouraged her to grab his hand “Well, you can come to me whenever you want to, no matter how dark your thoughts are”.
Ethan smiled, and Y/N was in awe at how perfect his teeth were and how mesmerising his smile was “The same goes for you, Y/N/N”.
They continued their walk towards the dorms with the sound of the busy streets of New York resonating in their ears. None of them said a word until they reached Ethan’s apartment, which was the closest one. He had to let go of her hand—and regretting it instantly when he felt the warmth of her palm leaving his skin—, as he looked for his keys.
“Well, thank you for everything, Ethan. I’ll let you rest”
“See you tomorrow, Y/N/N” he gave her his dazzling smile once more before closing the door.
Y/N went to bed with the a good feeling on her chest. She finally was about to get the revenge she had desired and also, maybe, she had gained someone to talk to, a potential friend.
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bluegekk0 · 3 months
Text
I've been in such an emotional slump lately. I fear that I upset my friends without realizing and now every interaction I feel like they're mad at me. It's like every time we chat I get the impression that they're annoyed with me, I keep thinking they're being sarcastic and trying to tell me to shut up in subtle ways, but I'm scared of asking cause what if I'm overreacting like I usually do? I just hate it so much. I feel like I'm such an exhausting person to be around and a little voice in the back of my mind keeps telling me it would be better for everyone if I distanced myself.
And I'm also fighting really hard against the idea that people in general are getting bored of me. I know engagement is not everything, I know that drawing for myself should be a priority. It makes me happy, and I draw what I love BECAUSE I love it. But it's so hard for me to not hope for validation and feedback when I've been compared to others all childhood. And it stings so much when a drawing I'm super happy with maybe doesn't perform as well as I hoped (at least compares to the number of people who follow me). I don't know if it's not reaching people here or if it's just getting too repetitive for people to care anymore. Or perhaps people see my self-reblogs as desperate and get discourages from interacting for that reason? Maybe they're right for that.
I've also been looking into and educating myself on the experiences of autistic individuals since I suspect I'm on the spectrum, and I do relate to many of them, plus every test I take indicates that I might be autistic. So in theory, self diagnosing would help, right? I could stop worrying that I'm broken somehow or a failure of an adult, and just accept that my brain simply works differently and maybe even be more kind to myself. That sounds good. But then the doubts keep creeping in. I don't remember if I showed any signs in my childhood, I barely remember anything from it. So what if I'm wrong, what if there were none, and I'm just overanalyzing symptoms or even faking them? How can I consider myself part of the community if there is a chance I shouldn't be there at all? What if I'm just lazy, what if I'm an introverted, anxious loser who put themselves in this situation by being incompetent at everything, now trying to find excuses?
I don't know. There's so many exhausting thoughts that have been dragging my mood down for the past few days. And I guess I'm just waiting for it to pass since I'm so scared of actually going out there and getting help.
Well, there goes another oversharing session. I usually feel bad talking about this with my friends cause I don't want to put them under the obligation to respond. And with how terrible I am at responding to their struggles (not that I don't care, I'm just so, so bad at responding to emotions and putting my thoughts into words that don't make me sound robotic) it often feels too one sided. So I guess this is a way for me to scream into the void and give people a choice if they want to ignore it or respond. I could just write it down in a diary or something, but part of me is hoping that maybe this experience resonates with someone and I'd feel less alone. Or maybe I'm simply just desperate for advice or validation that would feed my ego.
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azulock · 10 months
Note
I just want to say I love your writing and love seeing any new posts you make even if they're for characters I don't care about I love reading your version of what a character would like or do! I was wondering if you could do a nsfw hc for a fem reader for hiori? seeing the latest chapter say he's an ultrasadist did something me lmao
Owwwwwwn thaaaank you nonnie! it's an honor knowing you'll read even the characters you don't care about geeez I feel flustered now <3 and oh boy, Hiori the oversharer, like that came out of nowhere bro, you don't just say shit like that. I can imagine the Ubers being able to hear that convo and later at their locker room being like "did you hear that?" "yeah, that was so weird". Besides he scares me, his favorite movie is ready player one, that's a worse red flag than a guy liking fight club 🚩 anyway here we go
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hiori yo fem!reader nsfw headcanons
⟳ An ultrasadist by his own description, so better have a safeword in hand you might need it. He is, obviously, a dom. And I really do think for him to ever even think of subbing he'd need a lot of therapy before that. So yeah, it's the sadist dom type, hope your definition of pleasure is some hellraiser shit.
⟳ I don't need to say what type of dom he is right He's going straight for the punishment. Will intentionally make you mess up something he asks you to do just as an excuse, but he doesn't even really requires the excuse. He can be very commanding and vocal about his demands, and even demeaning if he thinks they haven't been met.
⟳ A true sucker for your pain and will do whatever he can to get it. His dick is only a bit above average so it won't stretch out your pussy too much but he can find other ways. Very much into wanting to stretch out your ass, and on making you gag while taking his cock balls deep into your mouth.
⟳ Also very much into toys. Got restraints, eye covers, gags and lots of rope. Candles for wax play and that slight burning sensation. Paddles to make sure you are bruised red. Nipple clamps that he likes tugging on a bit too much. And probably some animal ears and a plug with a tail, cause he is into pet play.
⟳ Likes playing with your clit and pussy aggressively but continuously denying you an orgasm until you've gone completely stupid. Wanna see you go dumb on his cock to the point where you are nonverbal. And even after that you ain't coming so easily. Also into dubcon like intox play and taking pictures of you while you are high and fucked out.
⟳ This twink is a tits man, loves a big fat pair of tits. He likes the sight when he gets you kneeling in front of him. Will have you tied up with your tits pushed together in a nice pretty bra sitting under his desk while he games. This way he can just shove his cock into your mouth when he gets frustrated and watch your tits bounce as you move when he looks dow. Will also have you rubbing your pussy against his foot if you ever hope to get off.
⟳ Wants you as free use, always willing to have him. Sometimes he is gonna fuck you for hours on end, no matter how tired you get. On others he'll just jerk off while watching you do something completely unaware only to show up, bend you down, and shove his cock into you just to cum inside your pussy. Or to cum all over your tits, he probably has a folder on his computer full of photos of you just like that.
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nahoney22 · 1 year
Note
Heyyy, I just wanted to say I love your writing. I know you have a lot of requests right now so please make sure to make time for yourself and take breaks!!
I'm going through a really hard time right now. And your works have been comforting me a lot. I don't want to overshare too much but I am very overwhelmed with the events going on in my life. My boyfriend asked me last night if I was okay and I just broke down.
I was wondering if you could write headcaonons about how the bad batch would react and comfort the reader in a similar situation? Like maybe they notice the reader has been closed off or just not themselves and when they check on them the reader breaks down?
If you're not comfortable writing this then no worries, I understand. Thank you 💕
Comforting Soulmates
All Bad Batch Boys X GN!Reader
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The boys comfort you when you’re at your lowest.
Warnings: angst and emotional reader with hints of insecurity and fears for the future but fixed with some fluff and comfort. Established relationships.
authors note: so sorry for the delay anon. I sincerely hope you’re having better days now. 💜
Dividers by @saradika and @itbmojojoejo - super cute and I fancied a change.
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Echo
When Echo asked you what was bothering you, having noticed your distant gazes and lack of interest in things. What he didn’t expect however was the tsunami of tears to pour down your cheeks at his question. Reacting quickly, he sat beside you and gently placed his hand on your back as you buried your face in your hands, struggling to catch your breath.
“Cyare, what is it?” He murmured, offering comfort by rubbing soothing circles on your back. It takes you a while but eventually, you begin to tell him that everything was too much, everything was moving too quickly and you just want it all to stop.
He patiently listened, refraining from interrupting, as you poured out your frustrations. Only the sound of your soft sniffles reverberated within the confines of the ship as you finally ceased your tears.
“I’m sorry you’re feeling this way, I wish I had asked you sooner.” He sighed, guilt biting away at him but this was about you now, and he wanted to give you the best advice he could.
“I know things are tough, especially after everything we’ve been through… but better days are definitely coming. It might not be today, or tomorrow but it is coming.”
You smile softly, wiping your tears with the back of your hand and lean into him. “Thank you, Echo.”
“It’s okay, I’m always, always here.”
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Wrecker
Wrecker barely had a chance to even ask about what was upsetting you. The moment he stepped onto the ship's plank, your arms enveloped him, seeking solace in his embrace big arms and warm body. As he felt his shirt grow damp against his chest, he realised you were crying and his heart sunk. "Baby? What's wrong?"
Without hesitation, he scooped you up in his arms, carrying you away from prying eyes to find a private space. Seated on his bunk, he cradled you in his lap, providing a secure haven for you to find comfort.
"Just... everything," you whimpered, your emotions erupting and overwhelming you.
“Like…?" he asked softly with a small prompt, caressing your thigh and tenderly wiping away your tears with his thumb. "Ya can tell me."
As you poured out your thoughts, he listened patiently, allowing you to express yourself fully. Despite not always being the most patient person himself, he always showed an unwavering amount of patience for you.
"I did notice that you haven't been yourself in the past few days. I wanted to do something special to cheer you up!" he exclaimed, a bright grin spreading across his face, infectious enough to bring a smile to your own.
"Yeah?"
"Yeah! I want to take ya out for a meal and just explore and have fun together! There's no one else I'd rather be with. You mean everything to me. Never forget that."
He planted a gentle kiss on your temple, letting his words sink into your consciousness.
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Hunter
Hunter's senses alerted him to the irregularity of your breathing from across the ship. Concerned that you might have injured yourself, he hurried towards you, only to halt at the foot of the bunk you both shared. His gaze fell upon your trembling shoulders as tears soaked the pillow beneath you.
"Hey, shh, come here," he beckoned, settling beside you and gently rolling you over to face him, his eyes locked with yours. "What's the reason for these tears?"
He had sensed a mounting emotional turmoil within you for some time, yet he lacked the courage to inquire about it, fearing that you might not be ready to share. Mentally berating himself, he regretted not asking sooner, as witnessing you in tears tugged at his heartstrings.
"I don't feel good enough," you confessed, your words causing his eyebrows to furrow and sadness to fill his eyes.
"Who made you feel that way?"
“Nobody, it's just... I just don't feel good enough," you sighed, sniffling as his hand cradled your face while the other lovingly ran through your hair.
"I'm sorry that you're experiencing this, but as I've said before, you are more than enough. Who you are is perfect in every single way, and even the imperfections you perceive only enhance your perfection. Please don't cry. I'm here for you."
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Tech
Tech sensed that something was amiss, yet he couldn't quite put his finger on it. As usual, you were seated together in the cockpit, but this time, you remained unresponsive to his ramblings. No smiles, no interjections—just silence.
"Is something wrong?" he inquired, setting aside the tools he had been holding. You looked at him and shook your head, but the glimmer in your eyes and the quiver of your lower lip betrayed your true feelings.
Suddenly, you burst into sobs, hastily covering your mouth to stifle the sound. Tech, bewildered, took a seat beside you. "That wasn't the reaction I expected," he remarked aloud, but he carefully spun your chair to face him. "Now, please tell me what's troubling you, my dear."
A part of him anticipated silence, but instead, you launched into a passionate rant about life's unfairness, its cruelty, and your overwhelming fear for the future and the war. Tears streamed down your face, and Tech leaned forward gently, using his hand to dab them away.
"I understand your concerns," he began, his voice calm and reassuring. "But as long as you're with me, there's nothing to be afraid of. I will protect you from any harm that may come your way. As for the war, it's something we have no control over. I know it might not be what you want to hear, but we must adapt to the life ahead, together."
Rising to his feet, Tech took your hands in his and helped you stand. Cupping your cheek with both hands, he used his thumbs to wipe away the remaining tears. He leaned in, pressing a gentle series of kisses on your forehead, nose, and finally, your lips. "One day at a time, my darling... Let's do something about these tears."
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Crosshair
Crosshair observed you pacing back and forth, clearly consumed by your own emotions. He remained silent, choosing to watch and analyse your emotions, waiting for the moment you'd make eye contact. When your gazes finally met, words were unnecessary.
The unspoken question in his eyes caused you to break down in tears, making you to turn away, feeling ashamed and silly over your tears in front of him. But, he was your boyfriend. And seeing you cry upset him.
Slowly, he stands tall, taking a step forward and approached you. He heard your sniffles and mumbled apologies as you heard him coming but you stop speaking as he placed a hand on your shoulder, gently turning you to face him.
Without uttering a single word, he drew you close to him. Words were never his strong suit, so he decided to rely on the power of his embrace to provide solace.
As your sobs gradually subsided, you leaned against his chest, finding comfort in his presence. You felt a sense of calm as he rested his chin atop your head and whispered softly,
"It's going to be okay. I love you. I have you."
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Masterlist
Tags: @andyoufollowyourheart @littlefeatherr @kaitou2417 @eyecandyeoz @captxin-rex @cwarssimp @jesseeka @ashotofspotchka a @oohyesplease @theroguesully @mustluvecho @ladykatakuri @jambolska-grozdova @arctrooper69 @padawancat97 @rain-on-kamino @either-madness-or-brilliance @staycalmandhugaclone @ko-neko-san @echos-girlfriend @fiveshelmet @dangraccoon @plushymiku-blog @chrissywakingup @kixs-husband @pb-jellybeans @nunanuggets @tech-aficionado @grizabellasolo @therealnekomari @tech-depression-inventory @brynhildrmimi @greaser-wolf @tinyreadersmur @seriowan @kaminocasey @marvel-starwars-nerd @ladytano420 @ladyzirkonia @raevulsix @imalovernotahater @crystal076 @blustalker @the-good-shittt @s1st3r @by-the-primes @the-bad-batch-baroness
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findingnemosworld · 1 year
Text
𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭 - 𝐛𝐞𝐧 𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐥
・𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐲: @a-little-bit-rascal
𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: 𝐢 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐟𝐮𝐧 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐨𝐧𝐞, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢 𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐠𝐮𝐲𝐬 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐢𝐭 𝐚𝐬 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐥.
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Y/N was a firm believer of fate, that whatever occurs was predetermined for her - and apparently going through two heartbreaks seemed to be the case, and while it does not seem that big of a deal to some, for her it was; as her heartbreaks were plastered online for everyone to see, Y/N was no ordinary girl, she'd been fortunate to break through the industry as a popular actor and dancer which had garnered her a sizable following, the exact following that saw her break down and come undone only to rise and get straight to work not allowing herself to fully grief the heartbreak until she was in her hometown, and yet somehow, after those heartbreak she was blessed, and it all started the day she had been invited to attend Wimbledon.
She was seated next to a handsome brunette man, around her age dressed in an all black casual yet stylish ensemble, with sunglasses over his eyes, and it wasn't until he removed them that she realized exactly who he was - Chelsea and England's star, Ben Chilwell.
The pair exchanged small talk which quickly formed into a conversation after the event as they exchanged numbers, Ben had even taken the initiative by asking her out on a date, then another and another when time was possible, yet in the midst of those six months nearing seven, they'd never discussed the possibility of becoming anything more than just two adults casually spending time together, while she didn't fault him for not labelling their relationship ( that's if it's a relationship ) she couldn't help but feel lost.
She knew she liked him, quite a lot yet the fear of abandonment, or worse, being dumped for the third time took over, hence why she never brought it up, firmly believing that Ben didn't see them going as far as they can.
Except he did.
You see, while Y/N was stressing over the prospect of them going far in their relationship, Ben was so enamored by her that his England teammates were the unfortunate victims of his affinity for the dancer, particularly James Maddison.
" Mate " James interjects, " I know you're obsessed with her, but for the love of all that is holy, stop! "
It was then that Ben realized that he had been oversharing a bit too much, " Sorry bout that " he murmurs.
" It's fine " James said, " I understand how you feel, I mean I was like that when I first met Kennedy, and here I am, three kids in and happily in love " he grew silent before smiling, " I have an idea, why don't we invite her to come? "
" I don't know mate, she's probably busy " Ben shrugs, as he knew she had a tight schedule of performances and the fact that he didn't want to scare her by making such a big move.
" Listen, Kennedy won't be able to come because she has to watch over the kids, I'll ask her to phone Y/N and see if she can come to Poland instead " James said, then adds with an eye roll, " If she says yes, you will man up, ask her to be your girlfriend and hopefully, get me out of my misery "
____
This is ludicrous, she shouldn't have allowed herself to be persuaded like this yet here she was, at the airport in the small shop looking at something to get for Ben - all the while she was debating if she should just walk out and miss the flight, her thoughts were soon broken by a familiar sound, she looks up to see Aine May in front of her, the girlfriend of Ben's teammate, Conor Gallagher.
" Y/N " Aine May smiles, embracing her before frowning. " You alright? "
Y/N attempted to wave it off with a smile, " Yeah, I just - I was looking for something to get Ben before the flight and I ... " she trails off and swallows the lump in her throat, " Am I making the right choice? I mean, we aren't even serious and here I am acting like a girlfriend " she chuckles.
The blonde girl shakes her head, " Show me your ticket? "
Y/N complies, giving her the ticket; Aine May grins, " we are literally sitting next to one another, come on, I'm getting a new cologne for Conor since he finished his last one "
They spent the next hour roaming through to get what they felt was fitting, and then boarding the flight. Y/N's mind felt messy, yet Aine May assured her that she'll be fine, that Ben would be happy to see her as several of the other WAG's would be there, the only thing she can hope for was that Ben would be happy to see her, otherwise ... this will be a terrible idea.
______________________________________________________________
( I know England flopped in the match but let's pretend they didn't )
The teams were in the tunnel, Ben stood behind James - and while he tried his best to focus, his brain draws back to Y/N and when James turned to him, he sighs. " Mate, relax! " he said, Ben sighs and shakes his head, " I should have asked her to come, I mean ... I miss her a lot, I know I sound like a sap but it's true "
" Yes, you do sound like a sap " James sighs softly, " Now, focus on the game and who knows, maybe she did come, I mean Kennedy didn't say anything but you never know " he shrugs.
They were ushered out onto the pitch, and Ben opted not to dwell on Y/N and instead try his best to pour his focus onto the upcoming match - they'd taken the pictures and were then dispersed onto the pitch in their assigned positions, the first half was definitely intense for England as clearly Ukraine were attempting their best to score early and unfortunately they'd done just that, the goal had definitely placed a damper on them throughout the first half up until the extra minutes when they walked in.
_
Y/N was able to catch the end of the first half and was heartbroken seeing the dejection on Ben as well as the England players as they had hoped not to concede, she took her seat next to Aine May who filled her on what happened earlier, the pair continued to chat until the second half began which seemed to pan out better for England who had thankfully equalized the scoresheet thanks to Kyle Walker's goal.
At around the 58th minute, England were awarded a corner which Ben jogged up to the corner to perform, and right then; he looked up and saw her, his face lights up almost instantly and just then, he turns around executing the corner which thankfully had the ball pushed into the net by Jude Bellingham thus granting England the lead over Ukraine, and provided them with momentum to keep the match in their favor until the very end.
Aine May nudges Y/N to alert her of Ben running over to greet her, what she didn't expect was to be greeted by a warm embrace followed by a soft kiss that radiated a deep sense of longing, " I missed you so much " Ben whispers.
" Yeah? " Y/N beams.
" Thank god you're here " James interrupts them, " He was driving us mad with how much he missed you " he laughs.
" Finally mate " Jude yells with a laugh.
" God knows how long we had to sit and endure him sapping over how much he missed her " Declan joins in.
" Stop it you two " came the voice of their captain and friend Harry Kane, " it's not his fault he's in love " he chuckles.
" But he had us wanting to drive heads up the wall Haz " Jude groans.
" Yeah, plus we couldn't sleep well " Conor said.
Y/N looks at Ben who blushes, " That bad huh? "
" You can't even imagine " Ben chuckles.
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jolapeno · 3 months
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Hi Jo!
How did you get into writing fanfic?
I’m sorry I’ve sat on this for so long, but I wanted to make sure I answered it with the full attention it deserves. I apologise for the length 😂.
I began this as to how, but then also why? and it got long.
warnings for: jo being overly open, sharing things she doesn’t usually, mentions of mental health, mention but not discussion of sexual trauma poor sleep, and again, oversharing. I don’t think I’ve been this open ever, so be gentle with me.
so, I began writing fanfic in 2015. I discovered it on accident, I was doom scrolling on Pinterest, trying to see if I could make some tree decorations in an insomnia bout (because I’d already completed TLOU - irony I know) and discovered a fanfic.
and I was lost in it, 200k deep and then I read another, and another, and I don’t know why I had an idea to attempt to write my own, but I did, and I poured all of my pain into it. (I eventually took this fic down because it was so freaking personal and painful to have up - and it’s still shared now by several people which irks me a lot). but god at the time? it healed me. and it brought me two people who I still talk to to this day, even if we don’t live in the same timezone.
I stayed in that fandom until 2018 when I left and continued only writing for daredevil (which id joined in like 2016).
and then in 2019 I stopped all together due to bad mental health, and just personal things in my life (I really wasn’t doing that well and wanted a bit of a reset).
it was then I began writing an original story. working on it obsessively, eventually shaping it to show some agents at a writing festival in 2020 (virtually, cause of the rona). and it was good, I met with three and two of them loved it. i had amazing feedback, including requests, and I should have been happy, right?
well, I FREAKED out. my little romcom could be something? I sobbed, I broke down, I couldn’t get out of bed for two days and I was a mess.
now, the reasons as to why, is still fuzzy to me. but I assume it’s because all of my life I’d truly believed that Im not good at anything. and writing was this one thing I had to myself, that I shared but never expected anything. and then, suddenly there was expectations, and the reality that people had read it—people who could do things with it, terrified me.
their nice words had weight, meaning? and yet they felt like iron pokers against my skin. even through therapy I don’t like delving into the why’s the what’s, but I assume it’s a combination of lack of self belief and the foundation I’m built on (and why I struggle with compliments) but also the fact it went from a hobby to something that could be something. and I think I freaked at it.
from here, my mental health took a big hit, I was so anxious I couldn’t leave the house and by the end of that year I was back to where I was in 2019, but if anything, much worse?
I didn’t know who I was. all the trauma i thought I’d healed from, rose up inside of me and it took me ages to finally be able to even think about writing again. I was broken. reset to more than factory settings because I couldn’t even recall what I liked? what I loved (outside of my husband and dog). I was a shadow wandering around, going from appointment to appointment.
and then, because he’s an amazing soul, my husband suggested I write fanfic again. start again, try. and I did. I potted around under a different name and then in 2022 i grabbed mvtthewmurdvck back, and I came back through call of duty.
by the end of that year, I found narcos 💁‍♀️ (javi supremacy) and here we are, 2024.
I say a lot that writing saved me, and it literally did.
and I rarely share all of this, but I’m not ashamed of my story, but sometimes I feel I should have been stronger?
but actually, I’m strong for getting up even when I was knocked down. I rebuilt, I reshaped and I discovered threads in myself I’d never known was there. and that took guts.
I was able to discover my sex drive, a thing I’ve struggled with (even in my loving and brilliant relationship) after some trauma when I was 15 with my boyfriend at the time (iykyk). I was able to write scenarios that I could then bring into my own life, and I wrote an entire fic (ILTWY) that helped me discover that I actually love sex. that I love pleasure in all its forms.
I was able to find my heart again, and write a romcom that made me find people I couldn’t be without now, but also, show myself that I can still write a romcom, and that thing in 2020 was just a blip, it wasn’t a sign and it wasn’t a thing that would define me.
and, even now, while I’m struggling to even smile, and I cried putting my eyebrows on this morning, I wrote my feelings out into a Drabble I’m not sure if I’ll share, that made me feel like I could go to work today and cope.
I say that notes and things aren’t my focus here, but never really explained why, but this, all above, is why. writing is there for me, it’s a crutch, it’s a saviour when the world feels too much. it was a thing that I lived without for a short period, but when I came back to it, it was like returning home.
and the best part? I get to share my words with you, I get to think “maybe this will resonate with people” and find that sometimes, it does. I get to be a comfort, to make someone smile, to make you laugh or even make you feel a little horny hahahah. and that means MORE to me, because when I was lost, afraid and terrified of the voice in my head, someone else’s words did that for me. they held me close, they helped me stop and pause and take a breath.
and that’s how I got into writing fanfic, and why it will forever be something special to me.
an: I haven’t edited this, and I’m shaking, so if there’s spelling mistakes, ignore.
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