#keep in mind all these happened like within the same dream

[olivianyx]

OMGG I JUST GOT RESULTS WITHOUT BEATING MYSELF UP WITH ROUTINES 😭 + RANT ✨

HEYY LUVS! I JUST WANNA SHARE MY RESULTS I MANIFESTED WITHIN 2-3 DAYS! THIS YEAR'S GONNA BE MY BEST YEAR Y'ALL ✋AND GUESS WHAT I DID? NOTHING. LITERALLY NOTHING. NUH-UH. PERIODT.

⚠ LONG POST AHEAD, SWEARING ⚠

WHAT I MANIFESTED:

🪄 PASSING MY FRESHMAN YEAR WITH HIGH SCORES

🪄 MY FAMILY BOUGHT A NEW APARTMENT WHICH WERE PREPARING TO MOVE IN 3 WEEKS

🪄 ME GETTING INTO THE VOID STATE 😭 AND MANIFESTED CLEAR SKIN! (DAYUM GETTING INTO THE VOID IS DEFO VERY EASY OMGG)

🪄 GETTING LESS ANXIOUS LATELY!

🪄 MY GASTRITIS AND ULCERITIS GETTING CURED

🪄 GETTING MORE COMPLIMENTS IN MY UNI!

🪄 GETTING TALLER! I WENT FROM 5'3" TO 5'7" IN 2 DAYS 😭😭

🪄 GETTING DREAMS OF ME SHIFTING TO MY WR 🥺 (ACTUALLY RESPAWNING LOL, AS THIS THING IS REALLY CONTROVERSIAL IN HERE, PLEASE DON'T GET ME CANCELLED- I'M DOING DEATHLESS RESPAWNING ✋)

🪄 MY MIND IS SURPRISINGLY CALM 😌 THERE'S STILL INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS THO (THOSE ARE ANNOYING ASS BITCHES) BUT I JUST IGNORE EM LIKE I IGNORE PEOPLE AT SCHOOL 🗿

🪄 GOT MANY CONFESSIONS TOO 😭 AND I REJECTED EM ALL, CUS I JUST WANT TO BE SINGLE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE ✋🗿 JK

🪄 GETTING COOL CLOTHES THAT MY MOM DENIED A LOTTA TIMES! (ACTUALLY I'VE ORDERED EM BUT STILL HAVEN'T SHIPPED TO MY ADDRESS YET LOL)

🪄 MY CRUSH BECOMING CLOSE TO ME HEHE 🤭 LIKE SHE DOESN'T CARE ABOUT ME MUCH, BUT LATELY SHE'S BEEN TOO CLOSE TO ME AND ALWAYS WANNA BE WITH ME LOL, 3 DAYS BACK SHE AND I WALKED HOME TOGETHER, WHILE WE GRABBED SOME SNACKS, SPOKE ABT EACH OTHER AND ALL (I FELT LIKE BEING IN A SHOUJO MANGA 😩)

🪄 A NEW PHONE! THAT SAMSUNG GALAXY S22 😩

I MANIFESTED EVERYTHING WITHIN 3 DAYS 😭 I REALLY CAN'T BELIEVE MY EYES, JUST. 3. FUCKING. DAYS. GODDAMMIT.

HOW I DID IT:

JUST FULFILLED IT IN MY IMAGINATION

YEP, YOU HEARD THAT RIGHT. I LIVED IN THE 4D REALITY, I NEVER GAVE A SHIT ABOUT THE 3D AT ALL. OK LEMME BREAK IT DOWN FOR Y'ALL SO JUST PAY ATTENTION FROM HERE ONWARDS.

🪄 SUPPOSE SOMETHING UNDESIRABLE OR UNFAVORABLE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE HAPPENING IN YOUR 3D. WHO'S THE CAUSE FOR THAT? YOU. 'BUT I DIDN'T IMAGINE OR THINK OF THESE 😭' BABY, YOU'RE THE SOLE CAUSE, EFFECT, AND THE SOLUTION. THERE'S NO OTHER EXPLANATION TO THIS.

🪄 AS WE ALL KNOW, 3D IS A MIRROR. RIGHT? WHATEVER YOU THINK ABOUT, YOUR ASSUMPTIONS, YOUR THOUGHTS, YOUR FEELINGS, YOUR PERSPECTIVE EVERYTHING WILL BE REFLECTED. SO WHY NOT THINK THE WAY YOU WANT SO YOU CAN EXPERIENCE THE SAME? GET IT.

🪄 IF YOU WANT TO CHANGE THE 3D, CHANGE YOUR 4D FIRST. CHANGE YOUR PERSPECTIVE TO HOW YOUR DESIRED SELF WOULD SEE THE WORLD. KEEP DWELLING IN IT. IF THE 3D SHOWS UNFAVORABLE CIRCUMSTANCES, DON'T FUCKING GET TRIGGERED. GO BACK TO YOUR IMAGINATION AND DENY YOUR SENSES.

🪄 EVERYTIME YOU SEE SOMETHING ELSE IN THE 3D, GO 'BRUHH THIS IS MY OLD STORY, I ALREADY HAVE WHAT I WANT, THIS IS JUST FAKE' AND MOVE ON. DISTRACT YOURSELF. CUS THE 3D WORLD WHICH YOU SEE IS AN ILLUSION, IT'S NOT REAL. IT'S YOUR CREATION, WHY WOULD YOU TRY TO CONTROL WHAT YOU CREATED? IT'S ALREADY IN CONTROL. YOU ONLY GOTTA REALISE YOUR GODSELF. YOU ARE THE CREATOR, NOT THE CREATION. STOP FUCKING VICTIMIZING YOURSELF.

🪄 I GET IT THAT MOST OF THE PEOPLE ARE CONFUSED BETWEEN LAW OF ASSUMPTION AND NON DUALISM. EVEN I WAS, BUT SLOWLY I REALISED THAT WE'RE ALL NOTHING. WE'RE JUST LIVING IN OUR OWN CREATIONS. VICTIMIZING OURSELVES IN OUR OWN CREATIONS. IRONIC RIGHT?

🪄 THOSE THOUGHTS, ANXIETY, FEELINGS, EMOTIONS ARE ALL IN YOUR PHYSICAL REALM. YOUR MIND, YOUR BODY, YOUR EGO EVERYTHING IS NO REAL, WE ASSUME IT TO BE. WE'RE ARE SHAPELESS, FORMLESS, WE'RE NOTHING! AND EVERYTHING AT THE SAME TIME. CUS EVERYTHING COMES DOWN TO ONE THING, I AM.

🪄 K Y'ALL MIGHT BE SUPER CONFUSED, WHAT I'M TRYNA INFUSE IN YOUR BRAINS. SO WHAT YOU DO IS, LIVE IN YOUR 4D.HOW? IMAGINATION. NO MATTER WHAT YOU SEE IN YOUR 3D, GO BACK TO YOUR IMAGINATION, AFFIRM OR VISUALISE. ANYTHING IS FINE BTW. JUST STAY IN THE STATE OF WISH FULFILLED.

🪄 STOP RELYING ON METHODS, FUCK THEM. JUST BE. DON'T TRY TO CHANGE SOMETHING WHEN YOU ALREADY HAVE THEM. JUST STOP, SURRENDER, STOP FIGHTING, STOP TRYING SO HARD WHEN YOUR ALREADY IT. SO GO LIVE IN YOUR IMAGINATION, FULLY SURRENDER. DO THINGS WHICH YOU LIKE. GO LIVE YOUR LIFE. TAKE YOUR POWER BACK.

LIKE AREN'T YOU TIRED? TRAPPED IN YOUR OWN CREATIONS? YOU CREATED THEM, YOU HAVE THE POWER TO CHANGE WHATEVER. TELL ME HOW LONG ARE YOU GONNA LIVE THIS BULLSHIT LIFE? YOU'RE REALLY GETTING COMFORTABLE BEING UNCOMFORTABLE. SO LISTEN UP, DO WHAT YOU LOVE, AFFIRM, VISUALISE, OR DAYDREAM, ZONE OUT, WHATEVER. ALL I DID WAS DO THIS MEDITATION IN THE MORNING, WENT ABOUT MY DAY WATCHING JUJUTSU KAISEN LMAO. THEN RANDOMLY AFFIRM, LIVED IN MY 4D, NEVER PAYED ANY FUCKING ATTENTION TO MY 3D, CUS I'M GOD. I REALLY LOVE VISUALISING, SO I PUT ON A SONG AND START DAYDREAMING IN MY ROOM SMILING LIKE AN IDIOT. ALSO, I DID SATS BEFORE GOING TO BED. THAT'S IT. THAT'S ALL I DID FOR 3 FUCKING DAYS, AND GOT WHAT EVER I WANT. ALSO I MADE A CUSTOM TAPE TOO (IT'S A GENERAL SELF CONCEPT ONE) I LISTENED TO IT FOR 30 MINS AND JUST WENT ABOUT MY DAY THINKING I HAD WHATEVER I FUCKING DESIRE, CUS IT'S ALL MY CREATIONS AND I HAVE IT ALREADY. THERE'S NOTHING TO GET, IT'S ALREADY IN ME.

LUV YOU, BYE 💋

[thefantasyden]

Needy Trio

Needy boys! Seungmin, Felix and Jeongin that are so attached to you that Seungmin and Jeongin decided to share a room so you could stay over all the time.

Seungmin, Felix and Jeongin that rarely sleep in their own beds because they insist they sleep better cuddling you, and they don't mind if the four of you are squished in to one bed.

Seungmin that awkwardly curls up between your legs with his head on your tummy while the other two boys cuddle up on either side of you.

Felix who buries his face in your boobs when he's the only one sharing your bed because they're just so soft and so warm and it makes him feel so very cosy and loved.

Jeongin who wakes up in the middle of the night with you sandwiched between him and Felix and can't stop himself from kissing along your exposed shoulder cause you look so pretty and he doesn't think he'd ever get to touch you like that if you were awake.

Seungmin who only has dirty dreams when he's in your bed and doesn't realise he's humping your leg until he feels a light kick against his calf and hears you muttering "puppy, you're doing it again."

Felix and Jeongin that may or may not take advantage of how pliant you are when you're asleep by letting their hands wander over your warm skin, wide eyes meeting one another every time your breathing changes or a soft sigh leaves your lips.

Felix and Jeongin who whine out excuses when you scold them one night, perfectly aware of Jeongins teeth nipping lightly against your neck as Felix let's his own explore the expanse of your chest, not feeling nearly as sorry or embarrassed as they should have when they consider that you'd stop scolding Seungmin for the way he would grind lazily against your leg in the middle of the night. Why shouldn't they get the same amount of grace from you?

Seungmin who quietly shuts the door of the bathroom behind him when he finds you brushing your teeth, timidly apologising for what had been happening at night. His face is flushed red as he tries to explain that he doesn't know why these dreams keep happening, but he doesn't want you to stop letting him cuddle up to you when he's become so reliant on your presence, a deep sigh of relief sounding from within him when you shake your head, petting his hair lovingly and telling him that he's a good boy and you know it's not his fault.

Felix and Jeongin who pout at Seungmin when he tells them to apologise to you and instead opt for cooking you lunch because they aren't really sorry but they do want you to know they care.

Felix and Jeongin who whimper pathetically when you tell them that only Seungmin gets special treatment that night, their protest fading when you tell them that they "should have just asked if they needed your help."

Seungmin who pants helplessly against your neck that night when you press your thigh harder against his Crotch and tug your shirt up, his eyes watery and pleading at your whispers. "It's okay puppy. Do whatever you need to do to feel better, okay?"

Seungmin who doesn't want to cum because he doesn't want you to stop praising and cooing at him like this, but he can't help it when your hand reaches down to palm at his hard length and he cums all over your thigh.

Felix and Jeongin who beg Seungmin to tell them how he got you to touch him and are so annoyed when he says all he did was be nice to you because they find it so much more fun to poke at you.

[anantaru]

DAY 3 — BIMBOFICATION

kinktober 2023. — masterlist | ao3

kink. bimbofication — the process of transforming into an airheaded slut, perfectly happy to be used and degraded

𖧡 — including — ayato, childe

𖧡 — warnings — fem! reader, bimbofication, degrading, rough & messy, slight possessive reader but only a little + they're possessive of you too lmao, name calling (fucktoy, bitch in heat, cocksleeve), petnames (angel, baby), both parties are consenting

𖧡 — AYATO

"angel.. my precious angel."

ayato slips a finger inside you, the dark outline of his silhouette mountainous on top of you, holding you captive, and he doesn't do anything besides gnashing on your jawline, until listlessly working his way down to your neck, taking your breath away when he glides the digit in and out effortlessly, then adding the second, gently working himself on your hole, imprinting his touch and trails on your walls, watching eagerly how you're engulfing him in with your cunt.

without any resistance making itself visible from your side, you appear to be enjoying this, a little too much— at the same time, you're such an adorable, precious toy to him, always clinging yourself around his arm whenever he was in near sight of you, your smirking lips puckered up into a dirty smile with a glossy film of sparkly lipgloss sleeving the flesh, day-dreaming about having the yashiro commissioner's heavy, piercing cock jamming your insides.

in any case, with how quick things were proceeding now, you love how the heel of his palm repeatedly humps your clit, the blows of it stinging at the puffy flesh before you arch your back into his hand, giggling within a clouded sigh, you're so excited to have his attention, grinning from ear to ear.

the drive ayato had on you, controlling, delightful trembles inching over the length of your spine when he calls you his precious, perfect fucktoy— the only one, you made sure of that.

when he tells you how utterly proud he was of you taking him so very well, especially when he can witness your eyes rolling back at the second of your cunt becoming so warm and constricting, it brings you to tears when listening to such loving words, being praised in such, "unique" way, where one might say it's not praise in any way, but for you, it's nothing but the most sugary, most tasteful expressing of approval to you.

it's easy once you gave yourself over to him, meaning his status and his power and made yourself his property, to that of someone being responsible to satiate the mans needs, conquer the aching pain in his groin whenever he was too busy or clocked up to do so himself. and the pleasure he made you experience, fuck, it reached the pit of a forming bubble, when he reaches into your walls with his slender fingers, your cunt clamping at the contract with the whistling in your head placing black dots on your vision.

yes, certainly— you realize then, you wanted to be treated like that.

forgetting about what others may whisper and gossip behind your back, why would you care, they might be just jealous for all you know— and for whatever reason ayato keeps you close to him, if there was a somewhat, deeper, connection or emotion he began to develop for you— baring in mind that he was the exact opposite of an outgoing player that pursued any women, only having you to touch and trace, fuck and kiss, it could possibly happen that somewhere in between his puzzling, swishing lines of thinking, kamisato ayato can work up the courage to feel something serious in regards to you, something contrasting to viewing you as this convenient toy, his darling cocksleeve, always there for his immediate use.

𖧡 — CHILDE

childe shushes your helpless mewls softly when he laps his tongue around the warm insides of your mouth, his cock taking advantage of your soft, weeping pussy, and how you're proudly presenting it all to him— just for him, you're his, in all respects, and he has trained you well, looking at how your toes curl when you greet him with a hazy, beclouded grin as you vibrate at his shaft moving along your soaked walls before pressing his tip against your g-spot.

"ohh- my, baby." childe groans, lecherous eyes gazing at your erotic body, "you're so good to me, when you let me fuck you like a bitch in heat." and he dominantly holds you up by your trembling knees, parting your pussy to accommodate the thudding stir of his length splitting you without a single care in this world, and every time he pulls himself balls deep into your hole, you gush and slick him up, making a mess of his girth and upper thighs, whimpering all wetly and perceiving how your cheeks are not only stained by your tears, but also flustered by his unique, scandalous choice of words.

but you wanted it that way, truly, being a harbingers personal belong, his little plaything you may say, as he liked to address you as well, it was intoxicating to be as slutty as possible to get his attention.

you can't help yourself but giggle out bubbly whenever he buys you something special too, an expensive gift— handled with delicate, tactful care, opening the package to find a silken lingerie-set that childe had personally picked out for you, barely awaiting the day where he can rip it off your perfect body, assuring you he'll purchase a new one in no time.

how come, you aren't even more riled up by now? your pretty pussy was so reactive to his length, easily affected by the largeness of his girth parting you for good, you're wet all day from the constant day dreams, drooling about childe's cock all day long, or about his hands grabbing and massaging your soft skin, how you knew how much he liked whenever you presented your exposed tits to him, vigorously massaging the nipples before pressing them against his chest.

"you feel good, hm?" ajax whispers into your ear, on the teetering edge of filling your womb with his seed, rolling his strong hips in and out of you before curving one palm around your cheek to force you to meet his gaze— yet your eyes were barely open, but that smile, it made him both shiver and admire your beauty, an expression so radiant on your lips that it startled even a harbinger.

"fuck, you're a mess." he licks his lips, and you foggily nod your head when he voices it out loud, helplessly hiccuping his name whilst grabbing on his chest to make him cling onto you and never let you go, well, not until he made you cum— your pussy being pillowed over by his cock bulging into you, indulging in the sensation of your soft, doused cunt slapping back against his groin, all wanting and desperate.

in spite of appearance, childe was aware that you were precisely into this manner of being treating, but in a sense, so was he, deep down believing that he’d never feel any satisfaction that could even scratch on the one you placed on him.

©2023 anantaru's kinktober do not repost, copy, translate, modify

[giamee]

𝐅𝐀𝐃𝐄 𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐎 𝐘𝐎𝐔!

ཐི♡ཋྀ featuring -> luocha, blade, dan heng, jing yuan, gepard landau, welt yang

ཐི♡ཋྀ contains -> soulmate!au, no warnings just fluff (?) and maybe a bit suggestive for welt. ALSO LUOCHA'S IS SO ANGSTY AND FOR WHAT IDK IM SORRY

ཐི♡ཋྀ gia's notes -> ok so you know that soulmate au thing where the moles on ur body are where ur lover in a past life kissed you the most? yeah. i opened star rail for the first time in like 2 weeks today cos i rage quit after getting silver wolf while trying to build pity for luocha and then i did the story quest thingy and brainrot happened. sorry for being gone for so long. have this <3 (ppl who requested stuff two months ago i see you i hear you i'm just a slow writer)

☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★ LUOCHA has a particularly noticeable mole on the right side of his neck. with his high collar and serious expression, that remains another guarded secret of his that is privy to only his own searching eyes, a secret that raises colour in his cheeks at the insinuation of its placement.

having spent more time around the dead than the living these past few months, love and human connection is not exactly an occurence that can happen naturally within his profession.

and for the most part, that's alright.

yet there are some lonely nights where luocha finds his gloved fingertips grazing the dark spot on his neck, wishing that he could be graced with the same tenderness in this life that he had received in his previous one. if he closed his eyes and concentrated hard enough, he could almost feel the ghostly brush of a pair of lips against his cool skin, the feathery sensation sending a soft shiver down his spine, accompanied by the distant giggle of a past lover in his ear before it slips his grasp and he rolls onto his side in frustration.

that damned spot might as well be placed directly over his heart, considering the amount of influence it held over him.

he could only hope that his dreams tonight would reunite him with the figure that haunts his conscious mind too now, and continue his fruitless search to find them once again in his waking realm.

☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★ BLADE has moles on his chest and back littered amidst the scars that mar his porcelain skin. always a skeptic, the man has never been one to believe in the fanciful stories of soulmates destined to be, sneering in the face of such notions as fate, preferring to keep his head resolutely on his shoulders and feet planted on the ground.

and in some sense, he's right.

because when he met you, in this current life, you joined him in his rejection of a perfect other half. and then, slowly but surely, you had wormed your way into his heart, and his insistence on not having any such thing as a soulmate seems like such a flimsy rebuttal to the way you gaze at him in adoration, fingers trailing in your lips' wake as they brush over each individual mark on his chest.

he tries not to shiver when he feels your warm lips descend upon the skin of his back, your fingers tracing the faded marks that depict his life story with a silent promise that you'll be there for him, and to count every mark on his skin with tender care.

☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★ DAN HENG often finds himself staring in wonder at the moles which litter his arms. starting from his wrists, there is a dusting of them that creeps all the way up to his shoulders, placed upon his skin with such deliberate care that it's almost a foreign concept to him.

in the later hours of the night, he allows himself to muse over the possibility of a soulmate, a lover in a past life destined to find him again, trying to solve the mystery of their identity by peering at his arms as if their face is etched into them.

and when he meets you, he feels breathless all over again as your hands interlink with his own, clasping them so fervently that lightning practically runs up his spine as your lips reunite with his skin, once again staking their claim as you make your way from his wrists to the rest of his body.

☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★ JING YUAN bears his mark with pride, the distinct spot residing comfortly underneath his eye, attracting his attention to it every time he paises to study his reflection.

he wouldn't call himself a vain man, so he appraises that one mole before continuing on with his day, but it's not until you have his face cupped in your palms, and your eyes study his features with an intensity he had not felt until now, that you mention that he has two other moles on his face, albeit fainter.

and you make a point of reaffirming their existence at every chance you get, with you and jing yuan's morning routine involving your lips brushing against the faint mole on the apple of his cheek and bridge of his nose before landing a last one underneath his eye.

those only serve as a mere guidline, though, as you do not hesitate to pepper the rest of his unblemished face with kisses as your symbol of affection.

☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★ GEPARD does not know what to think of the moles that litter his collarbones. they're rather prominent, and if he lets himself think about them for too long, he'll start blushing.

even the thought of someone kissing him there makes his brain short circuit, so the sensation is definitely one that he will have to get used to with you.

the slightly sadistic part of you revels in the way his blushing face hides itself behind his hands when you kiss him on those marks, a muffled boyish giggle escaping his lips at the ticklish sensation of your lashes brushing against his skin when you lay your head against his chest.

you decide to place a few additional marks for his next life when you kiss the backs of his hands, until your lover relents and reveals his face to you once more, letting you place a final tender kiss to his lips.

☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★ WELT finds the little triangle of moles on his hipbone more humorous than anything. there's a certain intimacy to their placement that surpasses the more innocent and easily visible marks a person may have been granted by their soulmate, and he fonds himself wondering what kind of person his soulmate is for there to be the most frequent place they kiss.

and it's a pleasant surprise, really, as to how right it feels when you see those marks yourself and giggle, continuing their tradition by dropping a kiss to each in quick succession before grinning up at him with a smile so endearing that welt finds himself desperately committing the scene to memory.

𓏲 ࣪₊♡𓂃 IF YOU LIKED THIS, TRY: bound 2 fall in love!

honkai star rail masterlist ♡⸜(˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝

[hellcat8908]

A Solstice To Heal Azriel x Reader

This is Part Two to A Solstice To Forget

Warnings: slight previous trauma in the form of a nightmare

The snow crunched under Rhys's boots as he ran towards your body. You were cold to the touch, and he couldn't tell if you were breathing. He pressed his ear to your chest, feeling relieved to hear your heartbeat. It was barely audible and fairly weak, but it was still there. That was all the hope he needed before picking you up and winnowing you back to Velaris. Azriel took in the sight of you as Rhys ran towards your room.

Madja quickly set about trying to bring you back. The first thing she did was remove your wet clothes, taking note of the scars on your back as she checked you for injuries. The only condition she was able to treat you for was hypothermia from the cold. She wasn't able to determine what had caused you to collapse in the snow. The fire was going strong in the fireplace, and you were buried under blankets to bring your body temperature up. She stepped out once your heart beat became stronger and continued to improve. "She is resting, which is what she needs most. Her heartbeat is improving, which is a good sign." She says, updating Rhys and Azriel as they were waiting outside the room.

"Do you know how long before she'll regain consciousness?" Azriel asked. "I'm not sure. There is more to her condition besides hypothermia, and without knowing what it is, I can't give you accurate diagnoses of recovery time." Madja tells him sympathetically. "Do you know when she lost her wings?" Madja asks. Azriel and Rhys share a confused look. "Her wings? " Rhys says. "She never said anything about her wings." Rhys says as he goes over every conversation with you in his mind. Azriel doing the same and coming up empty with you, never mentioning them.

"The healer's who tended to her did an impressive job, but she still has the scars. They don't seem like an old injury if i had to guess, I'd say, the last few years." Madja said. "I've done everything I can for now. If her condition worsens, don't hesitate to send for me. "Try to keep her stress to a minimum once she's awake as we don't know what caused her initial collapse." Rhys and Azriel assure her they'll take care of you and call if they need her. Madja takes her leave. "How come she never told us?" Azriel asks. "Maybe she isn't ready to talk about it. Especially if it only happened within the last few years." Rhys said.

"Go home to Feyre and get some rest. I'll keep watching her and let you know if she wakes up." Azriel says. "Be sure to reach out if you need anything." Rhys says, giving Azriel's shoulder a reassuring squeeze. "I will." Azriel says before gently opening your and shutting it once he's inside. He pulls a chair from the corner of the room and sits beside the bed. He takes in your face, noticing the soft smile on your lips. He starts wondering what you're thinking about. He pulls an extra blanket over himself as he settles in to keep watch over you.

You were lost in the darkness before finding your way back into the light. You were standing beside the lake, feeling soft grass under your bare feet and the warmth of the sun on your face. Suddenly, you realized the warmth not just on your face but on your wings as well. You spread them wide, taking in the beauty of them as the sun shone on them. You quickly took off into the sky, soaring across it with the birds. You swooped down and dragged your fingers along the top of the water. You cherished the feeling of it.

Suddenly, storm clouds moved in with loud crashing of thunder and lightning. In an instant, you were crashing into the ground, your hands bloody as you held your wings. Your beautiful dream had quickly turned into a cruel nightmare. The thunder became your ex's laugh as he watched from the sky as your wings turned to ash in your hands. You fought to wake up, but the weight of your mind kept you under.

Azriel watched your face contort to pain and fear. He gently held your face as his thumbs brushed away your tears. "You're safe with me, I'll never let anyone hurt you again. Please come back to me, to us. We need you." He said softly, watching as you slowly relaxed into his touch. He continued to keep an eye on you, holding your hand. Eventually, the tiredness caught up with him, so his shadows watched over you while he slept.

You were sitting along the shoreline skipping stones like when you were a child. Your thoughts had turned to your found family and the look of hurt and fear on Azriel's face as you had run from the house of wind. You wish you could find him and apologize. You were thinking about how he went out of his way to try to include you but never forced you to feel obligated. He was patient with you, especially when you first started working with him. Suddenly, you felt a pull in your chest. Grasping at it, you find a golden thread leading off into the distance.

You stand and gently trail your fingers along the thread as you begin to follow it. The thread feels comforting and warm, driving you to find out where it leads. You pick up the pace, practically running towards what's on the other end of the thread. "Where are you taking me?" You ask out loud. It almost seems to answer "home." You stop and linger. "Home is not somewhere I wish to be ever again." You state. The thread seems to call you to keep going. You hesitate. A wave of comfort and longing glides along the thread, causing your feet to move again.

You come to the edge of the darkness and see a hazy image. You struggle to make it out. Your eyes squint, trying to bring it into focus. The thread leads to someone sleeping in a chair. Your eyes widen, not just someone, Azriel. Your heart pounds loudly in your ears as tears fall from your eyes. You firmly grasp the golden thread and tug on it. You watch as Azriel wakes up grasping his chest before his attention turns to you. You watch as he brushes the stray hairs from your sleeping face.

"I'm here, Angel. Just keep tugging on that bond. Let it lead you back to me. I have so many things I didn't get to tell you and so many memories I want to make with you." He continues to gently stroke your cheek with his thumb. "Everyone is worried about you and can't wait to see you." He continues. You feel a rush of love coming over at his words. You take the leap and hope Azriel is ready to catch you. Your eyes slowly flutter open as you blink from the bright sunlight coming through your window. Azriel's shadows quickly close the curtain for you. "Welcome back," Azriel says. "You gave us quite the scare."

"How long was I out?" You ask, your throat dry. "Overnight and most of the day." He answers as he hands you a glass of tea the house made for you. "What happened?" You ask as everything seems fuzzy. "You left, and Rhys found you unconcious at some burnt down village in the mountains." Your eyes flash with panic before you feel Azriel's hand on yours. "Angel, you need to try to remain calm." He says softly. "I'm sorry for pushing you to say goodbye to everyone, I didn't realize how you were feeling." He apologizes. "It wasn't saying goodbye to everyone that triggered this." You say motioning towards yourself.you notice you're practically naked under the blankets.

"Azriel, where are my clothes?" You ask, trying not to freak out. "Madja undressed you to get the soaked clothes off of you. "I'll step out so you can dress, I'm sorry I wasn't thinking." Azriel says. "Can you stay and maybe help me? Just pass me my undergarments first. He hands them to you after grabbing them from your dresser. You put them on under the blankets before stepping out of bed. "I just want a pair of leggings and a loose shirt." You tell him before he helps you step into the leggings. Then he helps you into a basic black shirt. "I need to tell everyone something. Do you think you can get them for me? Maybe we can gather in the dining room?"  You ask. "You need to rest. Resting is more important than anything else."

You let out a sigh, "a compromise, I'll rest for 30 minutes, then we gather everyone." You tell him confidently. "Two hours of rest." He counters. "One hour." You respond. "Deal," He says, "by the way, I would've gone 45 minutes." He says with a smirk. You glare at him, only causing his smile to widen. "Anyone ever tell you you're cute when you're mad?" He asks as you settle back under the blankets. "Aww, the spymaster thinks I'm cute." You tease. "Are we going to talk about this?" Azriel asks. "About you thinking I'm cute or that I'm your mate?" You ask nervously. "That we're mates."

"We'll have to eventually." You admit. "It didn't snap for me until today, before I woke up." He looks at you curiously. "It snapped while I was asleep or inconcious. It actually helped lead me back to here." You say feeling a bit embarrassed. "How long have you known about the bond?" You quickly change topic. "Since the day at the river house." He says, "I've always felt a pull towards you. I just couldn't explain it." He smiles as his thumb gently strokes the back of your hand. "Would you accept the bond?" He asks. "Yes." You answer without hesitation. "I want to wait til after you hear what I have to tell everyone before you make a decision, though." You continue.

"Nothing you say will change how I feel about you." He says confidently as he pulls your hand to his lips, pressing a kiss to the back of it. Your heart melts at the gesture. "I hope you're right." You say with a smile. "Alright, times up, start gathering everyone." You announce. He laughs. "You still have 10 more minutes of rest. Don't make me add more time to it." He says with a gentle laugh. "By the time everyone gets here, the 10 minutes will be up." You respond. "Angel, everyone is already here. They've been waiting since Rhys brought you home. Last night." He says as he brushes the stray strands of hair from your face.

"Azriel, please." You almost plead. "Am I such bad company you can't wait to see the others?" He asks, feigning fake offense. "You know I didn't mean it like that." You say as you squeeze his hand. "Alright, Rhys is moving everyone to the dining room for you." He says before offering a hand to help you out of bed. He keeps a hand hovering around you in case you need help as he walks with you towards the dining room. "Are you sure about this?" He asks as you hear the voices from the dining room. "Yes, I'm sure. I figured this was easier than telling everyone individually." You answer with some nervousness in your voice. "I'm right here if you need me." Azriel says, giving you a reassuring smile.

~☆~☆~☆~☆~☆~

@kalulakunundrum

@sh4nn

@lees-chaotic-brain

[romanoffsbish]

Kissing Booth

Natasha Romanoff x F!R (College AU)

Tired of your girlfriends on and off kind of love, you set off to see just how invested she is in keeping you | WC: 2,848

Warnings: Toxic-Ish themes | Jealous Nat | Blood

Smut: Public | Jean-Riding (R) | Oral (R) | Degradation (Slut)

18+ | Minors DNI

"Y/N Y/L/N's pledge to the campuses first ever, Mental Wellness Festival is: a one woman booth meant to stimulate your joy receptors; a smooch of serotonin. Fellas, swing on by and steal a kiss, from the palm of my hand, and enjoy your sweet treat. Ladies and They's lean in closer love, if you set the right price, you can take the grand prize—a kiss of your choosing; my lips taste like artificial cherry and melted chocolate if that's of any interest to you. All proceeds go to a fund set in place to create better avenues for those suffering to cope with their hefty course loads as they manage heavy thoughts too." Natasha read the words over and over again in her traumatized mind until her pure feelings came to a boil as she huffed and ripped the paper off of the wall of every place she'd found it.

———

It didn't matter though. Because even though she took them down within the same hour they'd gone up, when she stepped onto the quad lit up by stadium lights she saw that your booths line had wrapped around the diamond twice in the five minutes that it was open.

Her fists clenched briefly as she saw Wanda and Carol, her sorority sisters, eagerly stood in line. Then she shook her head with a near manic laugh. The redhead truly felt bad for the other people here who thought that you'd actually kiss them on their mouths. Foolish to even dream of it really, because you knew better than to let them taint your sweet lips with their lust.

Theirs was carnal; vile another way to express that they wouldn't care for you like she would. Hers was soul crushing, but in the euphoric sense, because you knew no matter what happened between you two, that you were never alone. Natasha might be away, or distant, but she'd never leave you to become another's prey.

Far too perfect for her to lose to her traitorous sisters. They'd be dealt with later, but right now, your (ex) girlfriend had to focus on creeping in the shadows. Watching to see just how far you'd push her buttons.

All Natasha needed was your patience for a month, not even the full thirty days honestly. It was only meant to be a break so that she could focus on her studies, the way her A+'s, and full marks had dropped to A-'s had scared her into thinking that space would help fix it.

It didn't, but she pretended it did because she could not psych herself out of sticking to her desired path. You clearly lacked the patience and respect only your mommy could teach you. The exams are literally next week, you've been so good up until this final stretch. Not bothering her with physical ambushes, or even texting her, which she actually scolded you for, to which you re-shared your location with her just to limit the contact you'd have to make with her through text.

That hurt her feelings a bit, but she refused to wallow in the mess that she'd made. Your feelings were hurt first, and the aftermath treated hers no kinder, and lord knows this wasn't the first time she's done this.

That was in high school, junior year, and you were distraught by the decision. Then Summer came with apologies, and forgiveness. Now, in your fourth and final year of undergrad, you're just used to it. For some reason she just kept getting away with it unscathed...

Until now at least.

The woman you craved watched you with dilated eyes that caught everything. She's only hiding to see who you flirt with, genuinely, and consequently putting them on her list of people whose life she must now ruin in relation to you. Her mind raced when you let an older woman peck your cheek, she had only given you $500, and yet you let the corners of your lips brush.

Natasha growled in place of a whimper, she couldn't get the infuriating image out of her mind, her eyes burned with frustration as she pictured you and the football captain's girlfriend leaving the field together.

The redhead wouldn't let that happen. Darcy Lewis, the gifted scientist, and lover to a Mr. Sam Wilson, would leave here sooner in a body bag than with you.

Natasha pictured shoving the overzealous woman off of a cliff, then she'd return so she could approach you as she dug in her deep crossbody fanny pack, to then slam her wad of cash into the full jar, pull you up into a bruising kiss, and lift the bowl as she kicked the table over, helping flip to the red closed sign for good.

It was $4,000 in hard cash, money she'd just pulled out this morning to get a cashiers check for rent and to pay her other bills; Natasha was pissed, you sure felt that in the way that she harshly nibbled on your lips, cracking open the silky smooth skin; bright red blood smeared your coffee stained teeth. Everyone's whispers of fury and shock were drowned out as your heart pounded wildly in your chest. Natasha hungrily sought out this elevated moment where she took a chance and recklessly guided your body around the corner until she could slam you up against a random concrete wall.

.... It paid off.

"Oh fuck," you huffed as your exposed upper back brushed against prickly vines, the crisp chill in the air instantly solidifying your blood against your skin. You could hardly care about the pain though as Natasha's thigh brushed against the bare cunt you'd sported beneath your skirt the entire night. That shiny metal chair was dripping with your essence as you saw your soulmate (ex-girlfriend) watching you with fury.

You were drenched, painfully needy, and screaming: "Natasha please—god I'm so fucking wet right now!"

"I know you are slut," she growled as her sharp canines grazed over the throbbing veins of your jugular. "I can feel your sticky mess through my jeans." You mewled at the rough press of your slick cunt to her pants, it had you seeing staticky stars. If she kept up a steady pace you were certain to be discovering galaxies. "Mmm, I need to cum mommy, need to cum so bad, please!"

"Yeah?" She scoffed, and you nodded frantically. "Well I need my money back, but instead I've donated it to do with these lips as I please so how about you shut it."

You didn't heed her warning, "Please, I'm sorry..."

"So fucking greedy," she growled, the glare she held as she pulled away from your neck sparked a thrill of fear to run straight to your core, your pretty eyes plead for reprieve, and naturally, the redhead gave in. "Go ahead slut, but make sure to let them hear you." Natasha's arms flexed as she expertly guided your core against the rough material of her jeans, and so you moaned out into the world her outwardly embarrassing title, letting everyone know they never stood a chance, it was a beautiful symphony to your on and off again lover that ended on a high note when she heard a familiar gush.

While you heavily panted, desperately breathing in the crisp night air that chilled your lungs into a hitch, she reveled in how the delicate rumble felt against her lips that were spread against the thin skin of your throat. Her tongue darted out, licking up the salty layer atop of your tacky skin, her teeth brushed back down, going the opposite way her tongue just had. The redheads goal of an endgame was etched into your exposed skin.

Your collarbones now decorated with her marks; ones that spoke of jealousy, and paired with a fragile love. You whimpered softly, the way her wet lips suckled on the already marked skin of your thudding pulse point bled off into the more painful side of things. Her wet tongue slid over the same spot in apology, then her lips founds yours after she kissed up the side of your neck.

Natasha's lips pressed against yours much softer than before, but you could tell she was frustrated with you. Which was fair, and matched as you stewed yourself, a part of you did feel guilty, but mostly, you felt broken.

But you weren't about to cry, no, you'd rather get mad.

It was what the naive asshole had earned. Natasha was great, a caring girlfriend who looked to you to smother with all of her love, the last six years together were a dream come true. A dream that faded into a nightmare whenever she becomes stressed, becoming someone you hardly recognize. She'd become dismissive, cold and quick to call for a blip; a break in your sacred union. Each time she said the same thing, "Just a bit of space is all I need, we'll be okay, mommy promises."

It was what she needed—never you, but she made it seem as if you'd happily agreed to her conditional love. As if letting you feel like her life could only improve if you were to leave it was something you took positively.

You were young, and carefree but not dumb enough to not know this wasn't healthy and maybe for your own petty thrill, you wanted to test her very limits. To see if she might just see what she risks losing, but you feel like all she got from this was more frustration. It only took a moment for her to huff that angrily against your chapped lips. "All I asked of you was for time Y/N."

You leaned your head back and pouted, eyes soft like a wounded puppy's. "We're better together Tasha."

Natasha sighed, "I know detka," she conceded with ease, her guilty face falling into the crook of your neck as she took in a calming breath. "I've been miserable without you honey, but we had to know that this could work. I'm going to have to travel for work, and I don't want to have to worry about you entertaining others."

"I'd never cheat," you hissed, "You asked for a break, that means we're no longer in a relationship Natasha."

"That's not what I meant and you know it Y/N," her nails dug into your sides. "Never have we ever ran a kissing booth during one, now stop being so difficult."

"I'm not being difficult Natasha, I'm doing charity work, and having a bit of fun as I do it." You shrugged and she frowned. "So breaking my heart is fun?"

You sighed softly, unwilling to unpack the hypocrisy of her words, "The only way this works out is if only your body leaves me in those times, but if you're saying random bouts of silence is the final answer th—." Nat cut you off, "You stopped texting Y/N, not me."

"Yeah, because you just wanted a 'good morning' and 'night' or an 'I'm home' after my classes got out, and you'd simply like it. Not even a 'morning love' or a 'glad you made it home safe' or an 'I love you.' in response."

"I needed to focus on school," she tried to defend, it was a pathetic excuse, and you both knew it. "Then you can do that Natasha, but I won't be waiting for you anymore, these breaks in affection are killing me."

"What? I-." You pressed your hands to her shoulders and attempted to push her away but she fiercely stood her ground. "What are you saying Y/N? Because I—."

"Need to let me go," you tiredly replied, "If I, um, if our relationship is too much of a problem for you on your journey to success then it's best we end this now."

Natasha's heart froze in her chest, the idea made her ill. "No!" Natasha fell to her knees, lips brushing over your abdomen before her hands lifted your skirt, and then her nose was nudging the wet skin of your thigh beside your cunt. "I'll do better honey, I swear to it." Her lips trembled, "No more breaks," her voice cracked and your heart sank. Your hands fell to the outline of her head that was buried beneath your skirt, her erratic breaths fanned across the sticky mess between your thighs and your body shivered. "Natasha, get up."

You felt the godly crafted curve of her nose nudge your clit as she shook her head, your mind was reeling with desperation, the same as her words. "I'm insane Y/N, clearly, because my reckless hypocrisy nearly lost me you, but I'm not so crazy that I'd actually let you go."

"Nat..." your muttering of her name cut off in a shaky breath as you felt her shake her head again, the thin twigs snapped as you threw your head back. "No," she murmured against the slick curve of your labia, a wet kiss made your hip jolt off the wall and slip more of her face between your folds. "You are my home Y/N."

Your heart stuttered as you heard her sniffle, her warm tears cascaded over the slick of your thighs and soaked into the cracks of your kneecaps. Hurting her wasn't something you relished in, but it was also necessary.

You knew that up until now things had been toxic, but you also knew your threat of dissolution wouldn't be dismissed. Natasha wouldn't let you go, she'd fell for you way back in middle school, she had the diary's in a locked drawer outlining your future together, the stars were aligned well before you knew, and they officially clicked when she made her move sophomore year.

After puberty gave her a much needed confidence boost she'd asked you out, using homecoming as an excuse, and you didn't hesitate to say yes. She kissed you after walking you home, her mind shifted when her lips pressed into yours, giving her a taste, and from that moment forward she has held on possessively.

Which is why you knew the moment your flyers went up that she would be all over you. A minute part of you lived for these raw moments where the insecurities her distance had created are edged out of your wary mind. Natasha wasn't a fan of breaking your heart either, but with who her parents are you can show her some grace, her expression was clearly a byproduct of their neglect.

Especially when she worked your body so perfectly. "Mmm, fuck," you gasped abruptly, mind exceptionally fuzzy as her despair had turned into the sloppiest head you'd ever received in your life. The noises were lewd, not even the school's festival could drown her out the more her tongue lavished away at your oozing cunt.

Natasha forgot what it was like to breathe for a long moment, her nose and mouth too busy working together to keep your mind fuzzy from pleasure. It was also her way of relishing the time she spent with your intimacy, fear clawing at her heart that this could be it.

The final time she was able to make you cry out her name, to make you feel this good, to love you as she always should. Her mind ran wild with the thought that you might've been scoping out your next lover tonight—could Wanda or Carol be better suited for you? No! She shook her head again and you came, crying out for her—you needed her, and her alone.

Natasha's nails dug into your ass, spreading your cheeks so that she could delve even further into your core with her tongue. Intent solely on drinking you dry, not that she ever really could, no matter how much she lapped away you never failed to become wet again. It was a vicious cycle that she endured with glee.

Your essence was something she always savored, but in this exact moment she found herself rushing to clean it up, her body now plagued with a persistent urge to cry.

Tears and slick intermixed on your thighs, creating their own slippery consistency that led to the redhead falling further into you as she tried to push herself up. You chuckled slightly before reaching a hand down to help her to her feet, the humor dying as soon as her face was leveled with yours. It was hard to feel joy when the love of your life looked so damn despaired.

"Oh Tasha," you coo'd, hands gentle as they cupped her  wet cheeks. "Please, don't leave me detka," she sobbed, her slick hands laid over yours, attempting to keep the comfort of your touch on her, even if it was forced. Fortunately, your intent was only to bring her closer as you pulled her face forward and into a sloppy kiss. The way she whimpered at the affection solidified your choice to stay and fight for the love you knew existed.

"Take me home baby, these lips are yours to keep."

[sweatervest-obsessed]

You're Keeping Me Down

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Reader (she/her)

WC: ~5.8k

TW: mentions of trauma, mentions of Maeve, kissing, previous relationships, swearing, alcohol, so much crying, bad decisions, girlbossing

A/N: ayo....angsty teehee. I hope y'all like it! It's a sequel to Dedicated to New Lovers and was inspired mainly by Sara Bareilles's Gravity, some Harry Styles, and other sad songs. I hope y'all enjoy it!! I really do love reading all of your comments, and tags, and feedback because it makes me so happy to know you guys are enjoying the writing!! <3

“You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them.” ~Maya Angelou

Something always brought you back to Doctor Spencer Reid. No matter how hard you tried, no matter how much you fought it, something about the universe could not keep you away from him for too long. 

It was like the two of you were attached at opposite ends of a string, always pulling you towards one another, ignoring whatever you had been feeling beforehand. 

There was nothing you could do to escape him. You had tried traversing the globe, studying in Greece and Turkey, or taking vacations in the most remote villages of China; you had even done a two-week expedition traveling to Antarctica. But somehow, some way, Spencer Reid stayed in the back of your mind. 

Sometimes, it was like he was right next to you. You could still feel him next to you in your bed, or if you were alone in your car, your hand was absently reaching toward the passenger seat, only to feel the leather and not his leg. 

Maybe it was because all of those stupid little facts he had spouted to you were resting in the back of your mind, popping up when you’d come across anything he would have told you about. 

It was something you missed. He would just ramble on about anything to you, watching the joy on his face as he continued to speak, so grateful to have an audience, to have someone who cared. But you’d have to remind yourself that Spencer chose her as his audience instead of you. 

Her. 

The guilt of Maeve’s death followed you around more than Spencer did. At first, it was anything to do with therapists. The thought of choosing someone to speak to outside of your circle was a betrayal you had felt, and you couldn’t bring yourself to do the same. Then it was your distrust of your friends, watching as they became less and less frequent in your life. 

Work was all-consuming. You knew this fact well. Being one of the top profilers in the FBI meant that news of your transfer went fast, and the job offers came even quicker. But you decided to take some time off to rediscover the girl you once knew, someone outside her job. 

The BAU was simply your life for the past eight years. You worked at the BAU, you dated inside of the BAU, and your friends were all within the BAU–It was honestly a joke that it all had decided to come crumbling down once you felt secure in your life, in your job, in your relationship. 

You had filed the paperwork that allowed you to take two months of paid leave, not to leave the department. Your social media suddenly became filled with images of Ancient Greek monuments, Italian Vineyards, the French and Swiss Alps, and cities you once only visited in your wildest dreams. 

Escaping reality was the best way to rediscover who you are. And so you tried.

When you returned from your two months, you had walked into the BAU bullpen and straight to Hotch’s office. Your skin was tanner, and your hair was a bit lighter from all of the sun. You were suddenly this confident woman again, but you weren’t who you were before, making you nearly unrecognizable. 

“Y/N, please come in.” 

You smiled warmly at Hotch, giving him a quick hug. 

“You look good. How were your travels?” 

You smiled and leaned against the wall, not wanting to sit since that meant you would be here longer than you wanted. 

“It was everything I needed it to be, Hotch .” You nodded to the file on his desk with your name on it. “I take it Garcia ‘accidentally’ discovered my file and decided to drop it off?” 

Hotch sighed and opened the file, looking over at you. “Of course she did. I thought you were just transferring after your leave; I didn’t know you were leaving the Bureau entirely.” 

You nodded, a sad smile making its way onto your face. 

Hotch looked at you, replicating the same sad smile. 

“I wanted to tell you in person since I didn’t want you to find out via paperwork, but I should have known to come to your office first and then file it instead of filing it on my way to your office.” 

A soft chuckle passed through Hotch’s lips as he nodded. “We’re going to miss you more than before, Y/N.” 

“I won't be gone forever, Hotch. You can’t get rid of me that easily.” 

“I know.” He rounded the desk, giving you a quick hug, arm on your shoulder. “You have my number.” 

You gave him a quick smile, nodding, “Don’t worry, Jack will still be getting weekly updates about my travels, and expect a box of goodies occasionally. I have to uphold my reigning title of the coolest aunt ever.” 

As you left Hotch’s office, you didn’t notice Spencer at the coffee station. You didn’t see as he watched you quickly drop a note off on Emily’s desk and another on Derek’s desk before stepping into the elevator for the last time for the next two years. 

You didn’t notice the heartbreak in his eyes, and you didn’t notice the fact that he had overheard as you told Hotch you weren’t coming back to the FBI at all. 

But somehow, you found yourself back in that same elevator, visitor badge clipped to the new dress you had received as a gift from a friend during your month-long stay in India last year. The fabric draped across your body, highlighting how beautiful your curves were, and the colors brought out this newfound radiance in your skin, your eyes, your smile...

Color was the newest development in your life. The BAU meant that everything was in professional shades of blue, black, white, or maybe a subdued purple or green if you felt risky. But suddenly, your wardrobe burst through the rainbow as you experimented with patterns and shades, basking in this newfound joy beyond the world of suits. 

Eighteen months of experimenting–with life, with colors, with places you called home, with love.

You had two brief “love affairs” as Garcia lovingly called them. One was only two weeks long, but the other was a few months. Yet both were missing something special and could barely converse with you. Maybe that was how Spencer felt. And the sex wasn’t all that great either.  

And yet, after Eighteen months, an award, four nominations, a cat, a mediocre short-term relationship, and one groundbreaking dissertation that led to a Ph.D. later, you found yourself back in that damned elevator. 

You inhaled sharply as you heard the tiny ding, doors opening up to a sight that made your stomach twist. It was truly bittersweet to be back, to visit the place that once carried everything in your life, and to have it be so foreign to you. 

But what was not so foreign was how one Derek Morgan looked up as the door opened and his eyes filled to the brim with light. 

“Well, well, well, look who it is.” He dropped his file on his desk and met you in the middle of the side aisle of the bullpen, pulling you into a bone-crushing hug. “My woman.” He muttered into your hair, giving you an extra squeeze before pulling away slightly. 

“What’s up, sexy.” You laughed, thrilled to hear he hadn’t changed too much while you were away. 

“I’m sexy? Have you seen yourself recently?” He laughed, and you gave him a twirl, eager to show off one of your favorite dresses. “And where did you get this? Wait, wait, let me guess.” 

You pursed your lips, failing to hide the smile that was beaming across your face. 

“Was it your time in Taiwan? No no…Pakistan?” 

“So close. India. Maybe next time, champ.” You patted his arm, turning your head at the gasp behind me. 

“Do my eyes deceive me, or is that Doctor Y/N Y/L/N, world traveler extraordinaire?” 

“JJ, you saw me three days ago.” 

JJ pulled you into a hug. “Yeah, over Facetime,” she grumbled, not even trying to pretend she was upset at the sight of you in person. “You seriously have to stop sending Henry so much stuff.” 

“Some of it is for the other one, too.” You muttered to her, knowing she wasn’t fully public with her pregnancy at the BAU just yet. 

“I’ll be right back, I promise, I just have to say hi to Hotch first.” You placed your hands on their arms, turning towards Hotch’s office. As you went to knock on the door, it opened, leaving you face to face with the only person you weren’t ready to confront just yet. 

“Hi.” He breathed out.

And fuck you, he looked so good. 

“Hi, Spencer.” 

You watched as a wave of emotion rippled across his face. His name almost tasted weird in your mouth, not something you’ve often said in the two years apart. 

“I’ll, um..” He moved to step out of the way, letting you maneuver into Hotch’s office. 

But you had also tried to move, causing you and Spencer to almost collide, causing his hand to barely grace your waist. A spark flew through your skin at the thought of his touch, causing goosebumps up and down your body. 

You both muttered an apology, eyes not leaving the other until you quickly moved into Hotch’s office, causing him to move back, still watching as you closed the door in his face.

While you spoke to Hotch, catching up, Spencer was down in the bullpen at his desk, barely even trying to move them away from the windows. 

JJ and Derek stood around his desk, looking from the office to Spencer and back again. 

“She’s back.” He said simply when Kate approached them, wondering why they were all standing around, staring at Hotch’s office. 

“Who?” Kate crossed her arms, looking between the agents, hoping for an answer.

Spencer said your name for the first time in a very long time. And it was almost as if his brain whirred to life, like some part of him had been dormant for a long time. 

“Doctor.” 

Spencer gave Derek a weird look. “What?” 

“It’s Doctor Y/N Y/L/N now, Pretty Boy.” 

Spencer let his mouth fall into a small oh, letting his mind sink deeper and deeper into the pit of you. 

When you had originally left, Spencer decided to try and ignore you. It didn’t work, but he wouldn’t seek you out purposefully. He never looked up your name and tried to steer clear of the conversations involving you. But he wondered why you had never mentioned wanting to get a doctorate beforehand. He would have remembered something like that. He should have remembered something like that. ______________________________________________________________

The thought of Spencer’s fingers on your waist was the only thing you could think about for the rest of the day. Your skin hadn’t stopped tingling, and suddenly you wanted to drown in his touch, let his hands roam over your body and— “Stop it.” You said out loud as you put in your earrings. 

Your mind wasn’t playing far. 

“What did you say, sweetheart?” 

“Nothing, just talking to myself!” You called back, sighing as you smoothed out the front of the dress you had changed into. 

The team had decided to throw you a welcome-back party that night, generously hosted by David Rossi. And since they had all wanted an excuse to get dressed up, you gave them that much, meaning you had to dawn heels and a touch of makeup to accentuate the features you wanted. It also meant you got to pull out another stunning dress you had bought. 

Celebrating your doctorate, which you completed a year early, you had flown to Milan with Emily Prentiss and decided to go shopping, which is how you ended up with the current dress you were wearing. 

It fits you in all the right places, showing off just enough cleavage to be tasteful but maybe tempt something a bit more. You wondered if Spencer would like—

“God, I forgot how hot you look in that dress.” 

“Emily Prentiss, I could kiss you on the mouth.” 

Emily laughed and looped her arm through yours, staring at the two of you in the mirror. 

“Thank you for flying in on such short notice.” You whispered, unable to take your eyes off of the reflection staring back at you.

“We can call the whole thing off right now…”

You shook your head and smiled at her. “It’s for me. And I really want some of Rossi’s cooking right about now. Especially now that I can compare my worldly experiences with the Italian Masterchef himself.” You laughed, causing Emily to laugh with you. 

“Let's get going, yeah?” 

The ride to Rossi’s house on the outskirts of Washington D.C. made for a relaxing drive, filled with updates from your best friend about each other’s lives, even though it had only been a month since you had seen each other last. 

“I think you’re being perfectly reasonable, hun.” 

“You’re saying that because all I do is cry these days,” you grumbled, kissing the head of the black cat in your lap. 

Emily laughed and took a sip of her wine. “Or maybe I just know that you need a change of scenery. You’ve dedicated your entire life to the BAU and now you need to explore the entire rest of the world.” 

“I think you just want to go to Greece with me.” 

“You know how much I love Mamma Mia….”

You cracked a smile and picked up your glass. “Maybe Em, I’m not sure…I just…”

Emily watched as you looked up, trying to keep the tears from your eyes. 

“I know he’s not worth the tears,” you mumbled, but you exhaled slowly. “It’ll just hit me sometimes.” 

She stayed quiet, watching as you slowly worked through whatever was happening in your head. 

“It’s like he’s right next to me sometimes. I…It’s like sometimes my own head is against me for not talking to him. I heard a song the other day, and I immediately turned to tell him something about it and–It’s like he’s ruling over my mind—” You huffed angrily. “I feel like I’m not making any sense–god.” You downed your wine and placed the glass on the table. “Maybe I’m just meant to wallow and drink wine and be completely useless for the rest of my life…past my prime, past my worth. I was so—I was so fucking sure he was the one…Like there's this strong attachment to my chest and I’m connected to him for eternity, regardless of whether he loves me or not.” 

Emily pulled you into her arms while you cried, rubbing your back. 

“You are so much more than him, hun. You will go out in the world, figure out who you are again, and stand so tall, just how you’re supposed to.”

“So tall.” Emily looked at you as she parked the car in Rossi’s driveway. 

“Just the way I’m supposed to be.” You whispered, looking over at her, smiling.  ______________________________________________________________

You’ve been to Rossi’s more times than you could ever admit, but it managed to take your breath away every single time. After his first wife had passed away, he had put in a garden near the edge of his backyard, providing beautiful color for you to look at from the porch. 

Somehow, you always had a half-full glass, managing to have someone always get you a new drink when you seemed low. 

You managed to talk to Jack and Henry, telling them all about the wonders of the world you had seen, then being pulled away by Garcia to discuss that brief love affair you had in Argentina, which then led to telling Derek about your time in England, studying for your doctorate. 

Gratefully, you excused yourself when Rossi announced that dinner had been served, leading you to the tables set up in the backyard, filled to the brim with all your favorite foods. He had simply done too much. 

Dinner was filled with smiles, laughs, and chatter about the ‘good ol days’ and the newer memories being made. You had become acquainted with Kate Callahan, Emily’s replacement. She seemed nice enough, but you both were hesitant of one another. 

Spencer was sitting across the table from you. The two of you would catch glances at one another, passing moments where you couldn’t help but notice the way the wind ruffled his hair or the way the garden’s fairy lights reflected in his eyes. 

“So, what brings you back to Washington,” Hotch asks you the question every person at the table has been dying to hear the answer to. 

“Oh! Well…” You blushed slightly and shrugged. “It’s not that big of a deal, but I was just offered a position at Georgetown as an adjunct professor. If I take it, I’ll teach classes for at least the next semester. That is if I like it more than King’s College in London..”

The table erupted into congratulations, ending with a toast from Rossi.

You all raised your glass in “Salut”, and took a sip from your drink, but you couldn't help but look at Spencer, who was already looking at you. 

Excusing yourself from the table, you went inside quickly, walking towards the kitchen sink. You ran your hands under the cool water before splashing it across your face. 

“Y/n…”

There it was. The moment you had been dreading. The two of you were alone, no one else to buffer you, no one else to take your arm and drag you to the dance floor. 

“Spencer.” You turned around, your body leaning against the sink. God, you felt so small, so unable to watch yourself. 

“That’s a–that’s a beautiful dress.” 

“Milan.” You mused, fiddling with the ring on your pinky finger, unable to look away from the man before you. 

“Ah.” 

The silence hurt. Watching the two of you must have been painful because you could feel it. You once told this man everything about yourself; he once knew how your day went by one singular sigh. He could have told you what you were in the mood to eat for breakfast just by how you woke up. 

But now, you didn’t even know what to say. 

“Georgetown.” 

You nodded and looked down at your nails, seeming that they felt like a safer bet to look at. “Yeah, uh…should be fun. Can I–” You looked up at him. “Can I ask you something?” 

Spencer’s head nodded, and you pursed your lips, looking out the window and watching as your friends and family all laughed together and ate together. 

“When I was…um.” You cleared your throat, willing away the tears that had instantly sprung to your eyes. “When I was packing up all my stuff two years ago…I found the…W-Was it for her or…” You braced yourself for impact. Waiting for him to respond. 

Spencer’s eyes glassed over, and his mouth formed a small oh. He fiddled with his ring finger and looked out past you through the window. He couldn’t bear to watch the travesty he was about to cause. 

“You.” 

“Oh.” Fuck this. Fuck. You had sobbed over finding it for three hours while packing and then  sobbed again as you moved out. Somehow, hearing it out loud was worse. 

He was going to propose to you.

Spencer Reid had wanted to marry you. And god, that hurt. He wanted to spend the rest of his life with you, and then he told you that he wasn’t in love with you anymore. 

You didn’t care if you were reserving a spot in hell for yourself by damning an already dead woman. Her death meant Spencer could feel an ounce of the grief you just dug up. A sliver of the pain. 

Suddenly, you felt his hand on your jaw, a thumb on your cheek, wiping away the tear that had escaped your eye. “I am so sorry.” He whispered. 

And that broke the damn. 

He pulled you into his arms, and you let him, surrounding yourself with Spencer. Letting the smell of his cologne wash over you, letting him squeeze you tightly like he used to so long ago. The feeling of his chest rising and falling gave you such comfort that your brain was screaming at you to run away from it. You had finally built all your walls back up; you felt as if you could finally exist, but here in his arms, the world was silent. 

In his arms, you felt fragile; you felt so small. All of the strength you had was gone. And it felt so fucking good to not have to be the strong one, the person with the brave face. 

“I’m so sorry.” 

His lips kissed your hair, arm running up and down your back, trying so desperately to bring back that sense of comfort he once could provide you. And it was fucking working. God, why was it working. Why did it feel good? Why couldn’t you pull away? 

“Spence…” You mumbled into his shirt, that had been stained by your tears. You shook your head. “I can’t…We can’t…”

He pulled away from you slightly, eyes saddened, and you couldn’t tell if it was because you were rejecting him or because he still loved you just as much as you loved him. 

“I love you.” 

You pulled away from the kiss, hand on his chest, smiling brightly at him. “What?”

It was the most beautiful you had ever looked, Spencer decided. 

Your lips were puffy from how much the two of you were kissing, hair messy from his hands running through it, eyes wide with just as much love repeated in his own. 

“I love you.” He repeated, smiling beyond measure.

“Say it again.” You mumbled, yanking him back down to your lips, kissing him again and again. 

“I love you so much, y/n y/l/n.” 

You pulled away, laughter filling up the entire room. Pure joy echoed and bounced off of the walls. 

Spencer bit his lip, pulling away slightly. You hadn’t set it back. 

“Spence…” You cupped both cheeks with your hand, thumb rubbing over his bottom lip. “I love you too.” 

Just saying it caused you to giggle, full of love and pure joy. 

Loving anyone else would have caused you to gag–it still does. 

But the memory makes you shudder, causing you to step out of his arms, quickly wiping away your tears or trying your best to. 

The thought of love made you want to rip your head off. It made you want to sink to the bottom of the ocean and never resurface. 

Spencer said your name, making you shake your head. 

“You don’t love me Spencer. You haven’t for a long time.” The admission caused a resurgence of tears, making him take a step towards you. “No, Spencer, no.” 

You shook your head again. “I-I can’t…you hurt me. You…you left me for someone you had never even met. She was–god.” 

“I never loved her the way I love you.” 

“No.” You whispered, chest heaving. “No, no. You can’t..fuck. Don’t say that shit–why would you say that shit to me.” 

“Because it's the truth.” He said softly, too calmly for you to just ignore it. 

“How can you stand there and say that to me? You don’t mean it—You can’t..” The past two year’s worth of therapy, of moving on, of becoming your own, came crumbling down because fuck, you didn’t know what to believe anymore. “How can you just…You don’t fucking mean it.” 

“I know you don’t believe me, but I–”

“Don’t believe you?” You laughed at that, tears mixing with the stabs in your chest, dropping past your mouth as it laughed and laughed and laughed. “Then why did you fucking leave me. Why–Why–Why did you tell me to move out and…God Spencer, why did you come here tonight.” 

You were almost hysterical at that point; all Spencer could do was watch. He couldn't touch you because every time he tried, you’d move away or lose some part of your mind even more. 

“What about me was so–so–so, so boring, so understimulating to you, so desperately ignorant that you told me you didn’t love me anymore, that you kicked me out of our home, that made you reconsider wanting to marry me. And you know, I get it, I do. You found someone on your level intellectually, I get it. But still, I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life–what did she have that I didn’t, huh? What about her made her more appealing to talk to than me? ” 

“She…”

“She what, Spencer.”

“I wasn’t–”

“No.” You were leaning back against the counter, trying to gain some semblance of yourself back from the spiral you were on. “Don’t lie to me. Don’t give me some ‘unworthy’ thought process because maybe you’re fucking eidetic memory doesn’t remember all of the conversations we used to have, but I fucking do. I couldn’t cut them out of my skin if I tried, and god did I try.” 

Spencer stared at you, dumbfounded. He didn’t know what to do; he couldn’t function. All he could do was watch the pieces of you shatter all over, reliving the exact moments you were, but instead of being able to make it right, all he could watch as you closed yourself off more and more. 

“Y-you tried?” 

“God, Spencer, did you even look at me during those months.” 

“I…” He just looked at you, really looked at you. “I couldn’t.”

You scoffed, wiping away the tears on your cheeks, and straightened out your dress. 

“The only fucking thing I know is that if I don’t walk away now, then I will hate myself for the rest of my life for letting you talk me back into loving you again. And the worst part is, I still do. I don’t think I could ever love anyone again because of how much love I have for you, after everything we had been through, but—”

He kissed you.

Or you kissed him. 

You weren’t sure. 

But all you knew was that his hands were on your waist, and your hands were on his cheeks, and his lips were touching yours, and everything felt so right within the world, and your body was against his and just–

“Fuck.” You quickly pulled away, both of you panting, staring at one another, unsure about what happened. 

You two just stared at one another for what felt like forever until you heard Emily call your name from the porch. You took another step away, back against the kitchen counter, smoothing your hair and crossing your arms. 

Emily walked in and eyed the two of you, misreading the tension as something more antagonistic from before than what had actually happened. 

“Uh, Rossi made you a cake…” She looked between the both of you, watching as you nodded at her, standing up fully. You followed behind her, sparing one last look at Spencer, who was just looking at where you were standing. 

______________________________________________________________

“Uh, hi, sorry, could you point me toward Agent Hotchner’s Office.” 

The person whose shoulder you tapped turned around and gave you one of the most beautiful smiles you had ever seen. 

“Well hello, gorg–”

“Derek. Don’t be rude.” The woman next to Derek had elbowed him in the ribs, preventing more HR training for the both of them. “Hi. You must be Y/n. I’m Penelope, and that’s Derek, don’t mind him.” She looped her arm through yours and started to lead you towards the little staircase on the side of the room. 

“Hotch’s office is right up here.” 

“I–Thank you, Penelope.” You smiled at her. 

“I’ve read your file.” She whispered, smiling back at you. “I’m really excited to work with you because you are one impressive woman, let me tell you.” 

You blushed slightly, about to respond, but Penelope had knocked on Hotch’s door, causing a voice to tell you to “come in.” 

“Welcome to the team.” She pulled away, leaving you to enter Aaron Hotchner’s office for the first of many times. 

You opened the door and smiled at the man at the desk. “Hi, I’m–”

“Y/n Y/l/n, You have a very impressive resume. Please, take a seat.” He stood to shake your hand, gesturing to the chair before his desk. You quickly scanned the photos along the walls, the books on his shelves. 

“Everyone knows who I am before I know who they are.” You laughed slightly, taking the seat. 

“Yes, well, We’re all very excited to have you join us here.” 

The memory of your first day hit you like a wave when Aaron pulled your seat out for you back at the table outside. You stalled for only a second, but it was long enough for any of the various profilers at the table to notice something was off. 

You smiled through the speeches, and you laughed at the jokes and cried at the sweetness of your friends, but you were somewhere far away, dreaming about the moments that led you up to where you were. 

“And that is why I am glad to have you back because clearly, the universe respects you enough to let us all come together to celebrate the return of our Y/n.” You raised your glass and cheer with Rossi, standing up to hug him. 

“Now.” You smiled at all of the faces that looked up at you. “Let us eat cake!!” 

The table erupted and while Rossi cut slices for each of you, you sat back down, listening to what Garcia was telling you, but your eyes kept darting to the person directly across from you. 

You could feel his eyes any time they were on you, and you knew they were fleeting glances, but it was just too much. 

“Want to take a walk with me through the rose garden?” 

You nodded, standing up and accepting Derek’s arm, letting him lead you towards the garden, enjoying the fresh air and the sudden weight off of your shoulders. You couldn’t feel his gaze anymore but you knew he was still looking at you. 

“What’s next on your list of adventures.” Derek looked at you, watching the millions of emotions race across your face before settling on a smile and a shrug. 

“I’m not sure yet. You know about Georgetown, but I don’t know about D.C. anymore….”

Derek nodded and pulled out the chair at the small wire table. It sat under a trellis filled with gorgeously bloomed roses and baby’s breath. The smell was almost overwhelmingly fragrant. 

You gratefully took it and watched as he went and sat across from you. 

“You looked like you got a bit overwhelmed back there.” 

“What happened to not profiling me like I asked?” 

Derek chuckled, “It’s not profiling if it’s written on your sleeve.” 

You sighed and looked out at some of the flowers. “I don't…”

He let you work through it in your mind, just glad to keep you company while you figured your shit out. 

Eventually, you spoke up. “It’s weird.” 

Derek hummed in agreement. 

“I don’t know. Just. I felt like I was doing so well, and I was becoming my own person, figuring out who I was, and then I come back here, and suddenly I’m back to being that twenty-two-year-old kid who breezed her way through the academy. It’s like I did everything in my power to end up where I did, and then the universe told me I fucked up and should have done something else.” 

“I don’t think you fucked up in the slightest. Do you know how many people you saved?”

You went to brush off his comment, but Derek didn’t let you get a word in. 

“I know your entire world got completely fucked over, but you were meant to be in BAU. You were supposed to be there. I cannot think of my life without you, I know Garcia can’t, and I know Emily would tear you a new one if you even brought up to her the possibility that you being in her life was a mistake.” 

“Yeah, and now I’m thirty, with a doctorate and a cat, and no idea what to do with my life.” 

“But you also just spent the last two years seeing the world–how many countries did you go to…”

You pursued your lips, trying to count in your head. A blush spread across your face as you mumbled the number. 

“Sorry, wanna repeat that for me?” 

“At least fifty…” 

“That’s what I thought.” A very proud look crossed Derek's face, smiling at you. 

You looked down at your left hand, fiddling with your ring finger. No matter how hard Derek tried, no matter how much you enjoyed his company and the way he was keeping your ego healthily inflated, you couldn’t stop thinking about the fact that you could have been married–you could have been happy. 

“He told me when he bought it.” 

Your eyes snapped to Derek’s, and he looked at you with such soft eyes. 

That was something you had always loved about Derek. No matter how much he cared for you, no matter how gently he was being, he never treated you like a piece of glass.

“He, uh, I was the only one he told.” 

You nodded, waiting for him to continue. 

“When did you find it?” 

“When I was moving my things out of the apartment.” 

“Damn…” 

“Yeah.” You laughed. It was colder than usual but still antagonistic at the whole situation. “I…um. I found it on the last day when I was cleaning out my bedside table. He knew I never went into the bottom drawer because I literally never kept anything in there, but I checked because, you know, I was asked to leave, and…there it was. It was just…It’s ironic, really, how perfect it was, too. They say that if a guy can’t get the ring right, then he’s not the one for you, but no one preps you on if it’s the perfect ring, perfect size, but you had just broken up two days before you found it…” 

Derek nodded, letting you ramble. 

“I feel like I’m being weighed down by a million different things, yet they’re all him.” 

“What are you going to do about it?”

“I have no fucking idea.” 

"Sometimes good things fall apart, so that better things can fall together." ~ Marilyn Monroe

Part 3

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Tags: @lilrios-world @gubzgirl @mynameisnotokay @hereforfun22-blog @yoursarahg @mega-kittyglitter-1 @onlyspence

[patriwoso]

A betrayal • Alexia Putellas

If someone asked from the outside, you'd say Barca was like a family.

Claudia was your sister, a twin. You were double trouble.

Patri was the older sister.

Alexia was the mom. Soccer mom. She made sure you and Claudia kept in line.

You teased Ana and said she was the grandmother, eventually agreeing to be the Aunt though.

Mapi and Ingrid were like Soccer moms too, although sometimes you'd argue Mapi was too childish and she was the baby of the family.

The family was tight. You had your groups within the team and they were close.

When Alexia and Aitana went to the World Cup, you felt betrayed. Confused and upset why they would go against what they'd said the whole time.

You lost some of your family for a few months. You didn't want to talk to them, acknowledge them.

Going to a senior world cup had been yours and Claudia's dream. Mapi and Patri had experienced it before but you were yet to reach that stage of your career.

The first few days were spent crying in Mapi's arms. You felt overwhelmed and upset that this was happening, it wasn't fair.

Alexia had tried to reach out to you but you chose not to reply. Watching the calls on the screen until they rang out. Her messages appearing amongst other notifications.

Hey small stuff. Miss you x

Y/N I'm sorry, I love you ❤️

Please call me. I want to talk to you Y/N/N.

You spent a few weeks with Patri and Pina on holiday in Mallorca, boat trips and tanning on the beach.

The nights were spent cuddled up together watching films, sharing popcorn and toffees.

"Claudi stop wriggling." You'd tug on the blanket, pulling back what she had taken away from you.

"I'm not!"

"That pair of you... your children!" Patri sighs.

And then preseason training started again.

You were with the Barca B team like usual, some of the internationals joining back once their time in Australia and New Zealand had come to an end.

August 20th came around too fast.

You had stayed at Pina's place that night, sharing a bed like you would in the youth age groups on away camps.

"You know whatever happens today we were right for staying home. We stuck by our morals and what we believe P." You tell her, laying in bed.

She didn't reply but let out a giggle when your stomach rumbled loud.

"Let's go out for breakfast."

-

The next morning wasn't quite the same. You lay in Mapi's arms crying. Ingrid rubbing your back softly.

"It's not fair" You sobbed, rubbing your teary eyes on you sleeve.

"I know, mi amor." She kissed the top of your head.

"She messaged me again yesterday." You whispered, pulling out your phone and showing her.

"Y/N! You haven't replied to her messages since July 2nd!" Mapi slaps your arm.

"And?!" You cry, keeping tucked under her arm, watching as she scrolls through the phone.

"Mi querida, you can't just shut her out completely." Ingrid tells you, tucking some hair behind you ear.

"You have to remember that this was also best for Alexia's rehab and injury... As much as we both hate her being there." Mapi tells you, a bit reluctantly. "Message her."

You snatch you phone back, hovering over the keyboard before typing out 'I love you Alexia. I'm sorry'.

The blue button is hit and you chuck you phone on the end of the sofa, not wanting to do anything more.

"Baby steps I suppose." Mapi sighs.

-

You stayed off of social media for a while, not replying to anymore of Alexia's messages. You decided the one reply was enough for now.

Seeing Spain win was hard. You knew the preseason tour was coming up so you had something to keep your mind off of it.

You hadn't expected Alexia to come to Mexico with the team, it being just a week after the world cup final.

You’d spoken to Claudia and Patri one night after training. They didn’t know how to act, you all loved Alexia but the betrayal hurt a lot.

-

“Just smile.” Ingrid’s arm wrapped around you. keeping you close by her side.

Alexia and Mapi had turned up to the preseason tour camp a day after the rest of the team.

“I don’t want to see her, Ingrid.” You drop your head to the side to lean on her, the taller women’s arm pulling you closer into her.

“You can’t avoid her forever. She’s Alexia, and your her favourite on this team. She’ll want to see you.”

“I am not her favourite…”

Ingrid chuckles. “You so are, the favouritism is ridiculous y/n/n. She’s a football mom to you and your her favourite football daughter.”

You keep yourself in Ingrid’s arms, she’s a good hugger and radiates a lot of comfort for you.

“Alexia and María have arrived, they’ll join us in a few moments.” Jona announces to you all as your stood around on the training field.

You start picking at your fingers, a nervous habit of yours.

Your mucking around with Jana and Claudia when you see Alexia and Mapi jogging around the pitch.

The coaching staff split you up into groups of 8, yourself ending up with 6 Barca B players and Marta.

“You alright, grandma?” You smile cheekily and Marta slaps you on the arm.

“Hey Alexia!” You head one of the younger girls say.

You spin around on your heels and see Alexia approach the group.

“Jona said to join you guys.” She smiles, making eye contact with you before you look away.

You look at the floor, the ball bag, anything except Alexia, hoping she’ll leave you alone.

Truth is that you miss her, the 2 and a half months away from her has been a torture as your so used to being with her all the time.

“Hey.” You see her boots appear in front of you.

You turn around and head to the water cooler, getting a bottle out and drinking from it, anything to keep away from Alexia.

You didn’t want to do this, but you didn’t want to face her either.

You’d managed the whole training session without direct conversation, you ignored her stares across the field and worked your way to Claudia and Patri when she approached you.

-

That evening, you gathered in the hotel lobby. A group of fans asking Alexia for pictures and autographs.

You felt uncomfortable watching it, standing besides Mapi and Ingrid again.

“I miss her.” You sigh, whispering softly under your breath.

“Talk to her.” Ingrid whispers back. “She’ll want you too.”

Alexia works herself away from the fans, trying to get back into the group.

She pushes in between you and Caroline, listening to Jona talk before he dismisses you all.

Before she can say anything, or walk away, you through your arms around her shoulders and bury your head into her neck.

Neither of you say anything, you don’t have to.

She rubs your back softly, holding you tight in her arms as if she was afraid you would run off and ignore her again.

“I’m sorry.” She mumbles.

“I missed you.” A few tears spill from your eyes, soaking her training top a little.

“I missed you too, small stuff. You’ve gotten taller.” She smiles, kissing your forehead and wiping your teary eyes.

“Ale I hate you so much right now” You shake you head, moving back away from her. “But i love you and I’ve missed you and I don’t want you to do that ever again please.” You tear up some more.

She nods, pulling you back into her arms again. “I love you.”

[undercoverpena]

3. heather purple

frankie morales x f!reader | chapter three of do me yourself

summary: a meet-cute in a hardware store? impossible, out of the question. except, that's exactly what happens. a need for screws leads you to a broad-shouldered, brown-eyed man who you're sure is about to change your day, never mind your life.

wordcount: 3.8k chapter warnings: [see masterlist for series warnings] meet cute, flirting. fluff. flirting in person and over IG. frankie calls you 'rainy' (paint related from chp.1) no other descriptions or name used, you do wear a top and jeans tho. minor worrying/nervousness. no use of y/n. an: i love them i love them i love them

prev chapter | frankie's ig

key: frankie is in bold, you are in italics

Nervous energy pulsates through you.

It first manifested as a rattle, an annoyance when your eyes opened this morning. Now, it had grown into moving things half an inch and constant tapping—on surfaces, on you, on walls. All restless, practically relentless—vibrating and thrumming.

Then, your teeth began lazily, grazing over your lower lip, eyes flicking to the clock—fingers adjusting your laptop on the counter for what feels like the tenth time in as many minutes.

With a catch of your thumb, your phone illuminates, another nervous-tic, another thing you've been doing for the last so many moments.

Even if you know he’s on his way, having told you as much.

Normally, you would find it easy to calm yourself through pacing, the flexing of your fingers, and deep, soothing breaths. But not this time.

This time, it lingers. A persistent knot in your stomach that refuses to unravel and instead attempts to bathe in giddiness—a sensation you’d never imagined, never mind expected.

Suddenly, with another fluttering jolt, you wish you could backtrack the messages you had sent. The ones that had invited him—jovially, before seriously.

Because despite spending several minutes leaning on your cool, kitchen counter, with a glass of water pressed to your neck, warmth is still radiating from your skin.

The thinnest layer of sweat still remains on the base of your spine, sticking; the same as it is around your head—no matter how often you dab it away.

Admittedly, it’s all self-inflicted. Caused by the fact you had tried on a thousand things within the last half an hour. All of the failures were discarded, shoved (all unceremoniously), at the bottom of your closet, the door shoved shut in frustration.

Nothing had felt right. Nothing had looked right.

A mess of worries and overthinking churning in your head, all caused by your friend's echoing voice as you stared at yourself in the mirror:

Do you think he’ll size up your new office and then size you up? Do you think this is a date? Do you think he’s expecting to see your bedroom? Because if you count the coffee, this is the third, which means—

At the time, it had been easy to laugh. Play it down—continue to wash your dishes and clean around the sink.

But, it’s when the goodbyes had been exchanged; when there were no more cups or plates to clean, and you found yourself alone with nothing but the sounds of suds swirling down the drain. That's when your mind began to wander. To weave patterns of concerns, begin concocting.

Do you think…Do you think?

Do you think?

Deep down, you know it doesn't matter. Less so as your hand brushes over your face, heavy sigh exhaled, because he'd be here soon.

In your home.

Frankie would be able to see the poor state of your “remodel” or “flip” or whatever term it is for when you buy a rundown thing and try and make it liveable. He'd be able to see exactly why you'd looked lost in the hardware store he works, because look at your home. The place where you rest, sleep and work.

You could come and see it for yourself, wouldn’t need to keep guessing what I’m dreaming up. Yeah? You sure? Well, it would be easier than me trying to explain the issues I’m faced with because until an hour ago I didn’t know what a wrench was called. What did you use to call it? Tightening-tighty. Fitting name. I thought so too—until your latest “helpful” video ruined it. At least you’re learning now how selfish I am. You are, but I’ll forgive you because you have a nice smile. Is the smile enough to upgrade me from DMs to a phone number? Oh, you are pushing it. Well, to keep on pushing and this is presumptuous, but I can come round tomorrow. After I’ve finished up at work. Luca is back with his mom. Yeah? Send me your address and I’ll be there, rainy. I’ll send you my number too, so you can call when you leave.

And you had.

Then, tomorrow had become today, and you’d found yourself trying to flood the worries from your half-a-job redecorating with cleaning.

Some of it alleviated by decluttering half-empty boxes from around the base of pale walls, but part of it added more issues to your plate because suddenly you wished you had more plants. More colour.

More anything.

Because it’s bare, a barren of nothing. There are marks on the floor not lifted from scrubbing and cracks in the wall that need filling.

Disappointment lands on your shoulders, weighed down with pinched regret—because you realise (once again, having lived in blissful ignorance) that there is so much to do.

Swallowing, you glance around, scents of wood polish and floor spray swirling. You glare at the many holes filled in by the previous owners. The ones not painted over just yet.

Because you hadn’t decided on a shade—no colour scheme having jumped out.

The place is all just pale, off-white or faded magnolia.

"Fuck."

The urge to crawl into a ball rises, a sickening feeling swirling.

Somehow, if the state of your home doesn’t scare him away, a small part of you knows it can find comfort that maybe your humour is enough to keep him around.

A thought that should relax you, but instead makes your stomach twist more. Because you're not actually sure you're that funny. A realisation that forces your palms to become tacky, the thinnest layer of sweat trying to appear there, as well as everywhere else.

Because you like him.

The knowledge of it pricking at you, making you bite the skin from your lip and pick at your nails; it makes you wiggle your toes inside your socks on the wooden floor and fight a smile at something funny he’d said last night.

And then you hear it.

Wheels. Tyres crunch gravel as a black pick-up pulls up outside your home. One you remember from outside the store, from parking several blocks down from yours.

He’s here.

He’s here. He’s here. He’s fucking here—

The thought rotating, spinning—like a whirlpool drenching you in more sweat and making your head dizzy all at once.

You can’t move, can’t unstick yourself from the floorboard you’re on. Watching. Transfixed. Both feeling joy that he has come (as he said he would) and filled with horror because it’s happening, it’s all fucking happening.

With each step he takes up your drive, you want to bolt from your place and hide in your bedroom. Pretend you’re not home. Pretend something came up.

But you can’t lie.

Guilt swallowing that immediate thought. Watching him get closer and closer, until his knuckles wrap on the door, the noise filling your barely-filled home.

Fuck.

You manage to move then. All quiet steps. Delicate in how you cross the room that’s become a poor attempt at a living room.

Wrapping your palm around the handle, you’re surprised at its sudden heaviness—all cold, so cool against your skin it almost makes you hiss. Almost slipping when you turn it, palm so slick with nervousness as your arm tries to vibrate in its socket.

Opening the door, you disguise it. Layer all your worries and unravelling under a mask. Smothering and burying it in a smile—practically instantaneously. As though it’s the easiest thing to do around him.

But then, it is.

Because even if the rest of your body is having some reaction to the idea he could be stepping inside, you find yourself unable to help but grin. Not able to help lighting up like fairy lights hanging in the darkest night.

And, in the milliseconds of the two of you standing there, you actually begin to feel better.

“Hi.”

“Hey,” you reply, grin growing, forcing your cheeks to hurt in a matter of beats.

And you know you should move, let him in. But, what does it mean if you do? That voice, the one growing louder, who speaks nothing but worse cases and negativity, begins to increase in pitch. Smothering the sound of birds and someone cutting their grass several houses down.

Because is he here to measure up, to give recommendations—or will he kiss you again like he did against your car? Will his mouth move to other places, hands busying themselves, peeling? Will he be disappointed by what lies underneath your comfortable t-shirt and—

“You gonna invite me in?”

Pausing, you lower your gaze to the floor, leaning against the door for a moment. Eyes catching spots of purple on his jeans, finding yourself staring, glancing at how they resemble petals scattered in a careless dance.

You know it likely was accidental, a mere mishap, but it looks pretty, intentional. Even if it's likely tarnished an overworn, maybe slightly beloved pair of jeans.

He says your name, forcing your head up. Speaking it all soft—so full of care and intention—it almost makes you swoon and crack. Almost makes you widen the door to let him inside.

“I’m embarrassed. It’s… it’s not even—“

“Hey, hey, look at me.” And you do, like nothing could be simpler. “I know you haven’t long moved in—and, you wouldn’t be askin’ for an opinion if it looked the best it ever could. Right?”

“Right.”

“So, let me in b… Rainy, please.”

You don’t miss it.

Even if you pretend you do.

It circling, playing. Imagination fuelled up and running the show now.

A thing which drowns the worries, holds its head under water as your brain begins to wonder what him calling you baby could sound like, be like.

Slowly, you lift your head from the door and step to the side to let him in.

Thankful you do, because you catch the scent of the hardware store—one you found you’ve actually really, really missed.

As though picking up on the thousand hints at how on edge you are, Frankie asks to see the dresser.

Makes a comment about needing to see if the paint covered, if butterscotch orange looked as good on wood as it did on walls.

You don’t argue, instead leading the way. Take him past your sofa and armchair right into the kitchen. As you do, he shares his day, weaves in bits on Harry—how he’s nothing but a torment, even if he says it with a grin.

“He asked about you.”

Thankful for the pot boiling, you pour him a cup of coffee, placing it down before clutching your own. Admiring the way he’s squatted down next to the dresser—fingers sliding over the edges.

“And, what did you tell him?”

Shrugging, Frankie looks over his shoulder—a smile there, evident, easily present. “Said I would ask when I saw you tonight—but, that I assumed you were good from how much you made me laugh last night.”

Heat burns your ears, almost making them match the temperature of your palms from being around the mug.

You think, search, and feel desperate for something to say, all aiming to fill the emptiness when you begin explaining what you’ve already done to your 'cheap find'.

Doing so with as many technical terms as you remember from videos—how you’d restored it, sanded it, etc, etc.

It’s only when he looks over his shoulder again, do you realise how not-weird this is. How it doesn’t feel wrong—relaxing at the realisation, the room and house following suit.

Resting the cup to your chest, you clear your throat, “You know, you’re the first person outside of my best friend that’s been here.”

Brows raising, lost under his hat and curls, his smile slides up further into one cheek. “That makes me special, right?”

“Oh, I think you know you’re special, Morales. I’ve read the comments under your videos.”

A bark of laughter leaves him, head shaking, attention turning back to the dresser as he runs his hand over the top.

“You’ve done good.”

Instantly, you grin. Folding your arms, remaining leaning against the side of the kitchen counter as you almost let a ‘yeah?’ escape, that you instead trade for: “You sound surprised.”

“You did imply you were hopeless.”

Shrugging, you watch him stand tall, fingers itching under the front of his hat as he leans against the wall.

“I am still hopeless.”

Shaking his head, he does nothing but grin—gifting you one full of warmth and sunshine. “I think you’ve just not had someone to show you, that’s all.”

“That going to be you?”

His tongue slides into his cheek, giving a half-shrug as he moves closer, pausing at the side of your kitchen counter. “If you want.”

“You don’t mind that I might have Pinterest boards?”

Chewing his cheek, he smirks as broad and as wide as his shoulders—as though it is difficult to contain. “You definitely have them. Wouldn’t believe you if you said you didn’t?”

Heat warms your cheek, and remains there—burning and pulsing as you avert your eyes briefly. “Maybe I have them.”

His laugh escapes quickly, almost loudly, booming and echoing like before. And you want him to do it again, needing to, as soon as it dies down to flood from him and land against the walls again.

But, instead, you take a large mouthful, placing the mug down. "Shall I show you my dream?"

Heading to show him the spare room, the one that you’re hoping to make into an office, his work boots sound out, echoing around the stripped-back hallway and bare flooring.

There's a comfortable quiet you don’t wish to allow to shift when you head down the hallway, beginning to explain. Hands moving, gesturing, sporadically glancing over your shoulder as he follows—finding his eyes don’t fall to the open boxes, but remain firmly on you.

It isn’t until you step inside the open doorway and he pauses at the do you (on command) continue talking. Slowly pointing to where you think you’d want things. Listing, nose-scrunching as you say how nice it would be to have floor-to-ceiling shelving, an armchair—a desk with space for work. A plant here, maybe one there.

How you want to move from your kitchen counter to in here for work—maybe put up a piece of art here, some nice curtains there. A real desk chair that’ll support your back.

You only stop when you look back and find him resting his forearm on the doorway, not looking anywhere around the room, just at you.

And it makes you pause. Mesmerised, by the way he rolls the pads of his fingers against his thumb, his forearm flexing and how the end of his t-shirt has slightly risen due to his leans. It undoes you, making you forget what room you're even standing in as your brain melts and you become rendered completely, fucking useless.

The spell doesn’t break until his arm drops, fingers push his hat up, eyes warming as he takes the space in. “You want to work near the window?”

Nodding, you move to the side, allowing him space, watching him as he takes his eyes off you, moves into the room and stares around. He sweeps his gaze, brows furrowing occasionally before he stops close to the window.

Sliding the pencil from the top of his ear, he pulls a pad of paper from his pocket. Jotting things down, sketching—eyes zig-zagging across the wall as he tries to mark whatever his thought is down. Mouth moving, occasionally hearing him working out numbers, before the sound is muffled by a scratch of the pencil.

You’re in awe. Just observing. Making no sense of what it is he’s drawing. Least of all what he’s thinking. But gosh, is he handsome when he does it.

More so, when that soft smile creeps back over his face at you watching him, and you worry (briefly) whether you’ve said it out loud.

“You’d have a nice view if your desk was here.”

“Got a nice one right now.”

Snorting, Frankie rolls his eyes, the corner of his mouth ticking up into his cheek. “How much do you hate yourself for saying that?”

“Only a smidge,” you say, finger and thumb close together.

Holding his stare, you find the softness of his smile has spread to his eyes, and you can't help but roll your eyes. "Fine. Maybe a little more than a smidge," you amend, your own smile mirroring his.

His laughter fills the room once again, and you can't help but join in. The two of you standing there, and all you want to do is pinch yourself. Not sure how this could be real; how he could be, how all of this could be. How the grin on your face is really there and he’s really here—

“I’m thinking,” he begins. Voice clearing, eyes looking around. “We could build you a floor-to-ceiling set of shelves here like you want—maybe add some cupboards. Could be a nice backdrop if you’re sitting there. Can have it pre-built, or I can help you measure it, build it? Probably need—“

You should be listening. Maybe even making notes.

Not flicking your eyes to his lips, watching the way his face furrows or his lip curls in between listing things.

“How?"

"How, what?"

Swallowing, you exhale. "Did you get so good at that?”

His lips slide into his cheek. “At what?”

Tilting your head, you purse your lip, drop your arm from his shoulder, gesturing, finding the words. “I just watched you like—measure, with your head. I think I heard your brain... calculating?”

He pauses, mouth remaining open, a twinkle shimmering in his eye as he scratches at the curls hanging under his hat. “Oh, I… um. I used to fly. I was in the U.S. Army. Delta Force—guess I got good at measuring, doing calculations in my head, had to, you know?”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“Is that… that why you don't like to sit still either?”

Rolling his lips, he tucks the back behind his ear, nodding, a sheepish smile adorning his face.

“Well,” you say, “You’re good at it.”

Swallowing, he licks his lips, gaze not leaving you. “You not wanting to ask anything?”

“Should I?”

Shrugging, he licks his lip. Dragging it along slowly. “Some would.”

You shake your head, meeting his gaze. “I’m not some, am I?”

He considers it, your answer. Turns it over.

But his response isn’t verbal; it’s a gentle tug on the belt loop on your jeans, pulling you close. Out of instinct, your arm drapes over his shoulder. Silently thankful for the outfit choice, for choosing a nice top and jeans. Especially as you stand staring at him, eyes taking him in as he does the same.

Your heart pounds loudly in this definitive pause. A chance provided to cast your eyes away, to ask him what else he's thinking.

But that’s not what you want—not what you need.

Not as you close the small gap. Not as you watch his stare, all heavy and scorching, and how it drops to your lips, following a similar path you had taken on his face only a second prior.

Kiss me, you think.

But you realise as his lips slide into one cheek, dimple deepening, that the words had flowed out instead. Stretched out, laid a red carpet from yours to his.

And it’s inescapable, the pull you feel when your mouth marries itself to his, when your palm remains flush with his cheek, being greeted by the tickling of the wiry hairs on his jaw.

When he licks into your mouth, you’re gone—thrown off course and falling freely, all willingly, not wanting to ever land and not at all in fear of the descent as you grip him for stability. Neither of you stop when his hat falls from atop his head, landing with a crack on the floor.

Because it might be odd to have missed a mouth before, but you have.

Suddenly feeling all is right now it’s back against yours, where you write a story against his lips and taste the words he wishes to say in return. The room is empty, quiet—no backdrop this time compared to the street before—and so you can’t mask your whimpers, and you can’t mistake the sound of him groaning when you move him back so his back meets the walls.

Distantly aware of his hands gripping your waist, keeping you close, mouth chasing yours as you begin to grin, begin to feel him mirroring it.

And then he stops.

Pulls back.

A look on his face that’s unreadable and scrunched.

“I…”

Shame fires inside of you, like a key in an ignition, roaring itself to life. “I’m so sorry, Frankie—I thought, I mean—“

His hand comes around your wrist, stopping you, halting you in your desired path to move from him. “Stop, baby. Please.”

Baby.

It's there again. But this time, fully spoken, not held back.

“I just… I just want to do this right, is all. I’m… fuck, I’m here to help you. Meant to be a professional. Don’t… I don’t want you to think I tricked you into letting me in so I could… you know.”

Heat rises, billowing out across your cheek and neck. “I don’t… I don’t think that.”

“No?”

Shaking your head, you smile. “No.”

His chest fills before he lets out a loud exhale, thumb slowly drawing a circle on your wrist. “Good. ‘Cause…” he shakes his head as he bites his lower lip. “I want to take you out for dinner.” Index joining his thumb, both doing a pattern, as he whispers your name, forcing your eyes to meet his. “I want to treat you right. I… I don’t want to have come from work and—you know?”

Nodding you move a little closer, palm sliding over his cheek. “I know.”

He grins, sliding his palm down flush with yours, before he loops his fingers in between yours. “Good.”

“Good,” you whisper.

Tightening your hold on his, almost swinging it.

“Think you should kiss me again, though.”

Laughing, his eyes crinkle, dimple appearing briefly—but then he does.

Thank you for helping me move and assess the stability of my dresser.

No problem, glad to be of help.

I had a really nice time with you, Frankie.

How much did it pain you that you couldn’t work that into tease?

I’m wounded, bleeding out as we speak.

You need me to come back? Hold your hand.

Not sure that’s all I’d want you to do if you came back.

Not sure I’d keep my word about doing this right if I did either.

Because I’m an incredible kisser?

Because I didn’t want to leave you at all.

Wish you hadn’t, honestly.

Don’t tell me this, I’ll get back in my truck and come back.

Oh, the dreadfulness if you did.

Did you just use the word dreadfulness?

I did, and I stand by it.

What you doing on Friday at 7pm?

What do you want me to be doing on Friday at 7pm?

I want you to be sat opposite me at a place in town, candle in the middle.

Guess I can move things around to play footsie.

I’m eternally grateful.

NEXT CHAPTER ->

[starillusion13]

KEEP IT A SECRET

Pairing: stepbrothers! Jeno and Jaemin x f!reader

W.C: 13k (I want them please)

Genre: SMUT, YANDERE, STEP-CEST

Warnings: possessive behavior, restraining hint, manhandling(?), pervert!nomin, dom!nomin, biting, tiny bit of blood, sucking, crying, a bit of pain during it, nipple play, clit and tit stimulation, oral( f. Rec), lot of lot of overstimulation( 😉), double penetration, praising and name calling, raw penetration( don’t do irl guyz💀)

Network: @k-vanity @cultofdionysusnet

Note: please I want to thanks to people for reading and reblogging. Reviews are always appreciated 😭. Applause to the ones who come up to me to interact and they know how friendly I am. Okay enough!

MINORS LETS BE INNOCENT AND NOT INTERACT! Okay?🔞

*under the cue*

Stepbrothers are same as brothers, Right? Just you need to maintain a step away from them from being too close to them if you somehow feel uncomfortable or unwanted, afterall they are not related to you by blood. Yes, that’s what you have lectured yourself before coming to this grand house where you are sitting with bored eyes staring at the screen. You don’t even remember why you have come to the living room and sat there in first place but now regretting as to why you remained in that place instead of going to your room to find something more useful than facing the idiots who just entered through the big wooden door.

Your step-brothers. Maintain that step.

Since the first day, you came here after your beloved mother married her childhood best friend, your life is literally pathetic. Your parents never had that lovely little family couple relation in between them and you somehow hoped them to get separate and when you were in highschool, they finally parted their ways much to your liking. Somewhere, in the corner of your mind, you still missed that fatherly love and your mother did notice it as she also felt alone when seeing others being happy with their partners. After two months, her best-friend started coming to your house more often to check on both of you and your mother gladly welcomed him each and every time. Once, you eavesdropped on their conversation when coming back from school and then realized their life story.

Basically, they are those childhood sweethearts and had so many dreams to spend their life together. Unfortunate events led them to move apart and during those times, you mother was being married to your father and her lover went overseas for future plannings and under family's peer pressure, he also got married there. They didn’t have contact with each other until they again met at a fancy restaurant with their own little families. Somehow, they talked about their situation and accepted their fate. They again back to being friends. He somehow noticed that your mother was not happy in her life but what could he do when he was the one who left her to her miseries. When you were in primary school, her friend left for the states with his wife again and then again, she was never able to meet him. You don’t remember much about them from your childhood memories but when you met with your mother’s friend after your father left you, the memories flashes across your mind.

Never in your high school life, you ever thought of them getting married. You could see how she used to share every detail of her life with her friend and you were glad that she could talk about her problems to someone with whom she feels safe and most comfortable. That time, you also noticed that how her friend was meeting all alone with your mother instead of bringing his wife along, you didn’t think about it much but gradually you came to know that his wife was no more due to mishap. That was the main reason for them to reunite again and could find comfort within each other’s warmth. You were literally so happy for them, if they were more verbal to their family about their relationship then they could have lived a more blessed life since long ago but its okay, everything happens for a reason and maybe this reason could lead them to a better life. Eventually, after your completion of school, they brought up the topic about their marriage and surprisingly, you agreed with it instantly. You were happy to get a father who actually showed the fatherly love towards you and also you were thankful to him to love your mother so much.        

But maybe for you, two devils escaped from the hell that day. Girl, you didn’t know that the man who was building a paradise for you and your mother can also bring two devils of hell into that paradise. After marriage, when you three shifted to a different country, you came to know that your two lovely step-brothers are also shifting there to settle down with your family. First, you thought about getting two little brothers because you didn’t know in the first hand that he had child rather two sons and you hoped to see them but the next when you came to know about their age and they are handling all the business schedules and meetings of their father’s company, your head hit hard. Well they are the heirs of all your step-father’s company but now you are also part of it and you didn’t know it yet but the first introduction with your step-brothers and getting to know about the inheritance was not like how you expected.

“So, you are the pretty heir and the third inheritor of this huge property?”

“I am?....I don’t know about this.”

“Really? But dad has prepared every document for you and you are unaware of it? This is strange. If you are not here for the property then what the hell are you doing in my house?”

“Excuse me but this is my house as well. I am your sister so I should be here.”

Don’t forget you are just a step-sister.

“Interesting.”

A great physique wearing a white t-shirt complimenting each bump of the muscles and an eyebrow slit making his dark look more intimidating. His gaze was burning on your exposed skin and the aura radiating from him was so daring as well. That day, you knew that it was best to ignore the older one in that household because you feel so weak in front of that powerful presence around you. Somehow, you hoped for the other one to be a bit handful and friendly but unfortunately, it didn’t go like that. One day when your parents were out and only Jeno was there, chilling in the wide living area, you noticed it and made your way back to the garden family zone which is your favorite spot but not likely today. You just wanted to relax yourself in your room after having long classes in the university but you didn’t want to face your so called brother all alone in that mansion so until your parents were coming back, you opted to kill time in the garden. It was pretty much okay unless the other devil appeared in front of you disturbing your peaceful time.

“What’s a pretty baby doing here?”

This boy and his name calling.

“That’s none of your concern.”

“It is my concern when you are doing every possible stuff to ignore my brother. It hurts my feelings when you are avoiding that handsome brother of mine who can get every girl around here or anywhere even you…”

“What the hell? Just go away and let me relax.”

“Uh ah…NO. I cant let my one and only dear sister to be here outside in the late evening. Its getting dark and anything can happen when the surrounding falls black and its only you and me making the white spot.”

You could feel him leaning towards you slowly with each word falling from his mouth while kneeling in front of you to match your level sitting on a low rock seat. You pushed him when he fell back and balanced himself on his two hands, laughing at your flustered face which you were trying your best to hide from him.

“What type of bullshit you are saying? Get the fuck away Jaemin.”

“And if I don’t?”

“I will shout and tell that….that you are…you….I..I was..”

“Is my dear sister lost? Are you lost babygirl?”

His smirk is wide enough to fuel your anger more and your fist tight on your lap, nails digging in your palm, making the skin reddish all around. He stared at you for a while and stood up, dusting his pants while he could still feel the glares from you to which he had no effect rather he chuckled on the fact.

“What are you upto?”

“Nothing. Just go inside and don’t stay out. Jeno is just a human like you and me so he wont be feeding on you in the dinner.”

You frowned on his words and he smiled to your confused face and walked away. Did he just call himself and me at a same level? No way. I mean we are human but we both can't be same. He is that shitty human like his brother and the way Jeno always have a dark expression, you doubt that he might feed on you. Does your mother trust your new brothers so much that she left you alone with them? Stomping your feet, you walked into the house to find both of your brothers sitting on the sofa and laughing at their phone screen, maybe again watching some weird stuffs. You glanced towards the stairs and ran towards it when the not so lovely of your brother spoke up.

“What were you doing outside?”

“Didn’t Jaemin tell you that I don’t want to face you? Yes. I was avoiding you.”

You didn’t dare to look back to them, you were just hoping to escape the place that moment and lock yourself inside the room until your parents come back.

“And why?”

You didn’t speak anything but could feel both of their stares boring onto your back so you took some slow steps.

“I asked you something. Without entertaining my questions, you are again going away. Does our baby need some punishments to behave well?”

Hearing the last sentence, you ran to your room without caring what would happen next but you just made your strong opinion on not unlocking the door unless one of your parents come upstairs.

You are always been called out with endearments by Jaemin. He is the biggest flirt in the household. He might be the one with soft, playful and flirty nature but his intentions are always transparent and your parents appreciate his clinginess towards you. ‘Jaemin loves his sister so much. I am so glad they are getting along so well with each other.’

Well, only you know how that tease actually shows his brotherly love to you. He always has that intimidating lustful eyes following your every movement around the house and whenever you catch him for it, he would just simply give you his teasing smile and winks at you before walking away with smug look.

Whereas his brother Jeno, well you just know about him that however possible you need to avoid that individual because you cant read him like Jaemin. He always has that dark expression with clenched jaws and piercing eyes. When Jaemin’s stare feels like tickles on your skin like a winter warmth, Jeno’s eyes burn on your skin like a blazing sun in summer. The cold replies to your every question and whenever your parents are in front, he would watch you as if every mishap in the world is caused by you. Every reason is you for his life problems. You still don’t know whether he is happy with your presence or not and moreover it is okay for him to introduce you as his sister to everyone. Jaemin happily shows everyone that you belong to his family and Jeno just agree with him by nodding his head slightly but they never mentioned the actual relationship that you are their ‘stepsister’.

It's always ‘she is one of us’ or ‘she is our family’ for them.

“How was your Gym workouts my sons?”

“it was good mom.” Jaemin brightly smiled to his step-mom.

“Yeah it was.”

“Why are you so down Jeno? Are you tired?”

“He is just sulky mom. He is mad because he is not getting the appreciation he needs from his favorite person, you know.”

“Gym crush?”

“No… it’s-“

“Jaemin. You are going to shut up right now.”

 If Jeno’s glare could burn Jaemin then he would have turned into ashes that instant but maybe his sweats saved him and his laugh echoed throughout the dinning room. Your attention got averted towards the noise coming from the presence of three lovely beings conversing among themselves.

“Y/n. come and eat with us, you will be late for the outing.”

Your mother has called you many times to have the lunch because later this evening, you will be going out with your friends but before that you need to complete some assignments and your mother wont let you do so without you having the lunch on time.

“mom, told you that I’m not hungry. I will be in my room and if you need me just call me downstairs.”

Standing on your feet, you collected your ipad and phone from the sofa and made your way towards the stairs. The brothers shared a knowing look before speaking up and halting your steps.

“You are not leaving now.”

“Why is it your concern jeno?”

“This is our concern Y/n. You are our sister and skipping meals is not good for your health. Eat now. I will help with your assignments later so come here.”

“Jaemin you don’t have to.”

“Look. Your brothers are always taking care of you and this is so nice that he will also be helping you with your works.”

“But mom-“

“Y/n, don’t be stubborn.”

“Fine.”

As it had to be. You had your lunch with them, having some conversations from here and there. Your mother happily listened to your every word like usual but surprisingly your brothers were also interested in the topics. Even, Jeno stated some opinions regarding some issues and this is the first time, you felt grateful about his presence. He is not the type to have family time and moreover having conversations with any one of you other than his brother, Jaemin. Well, this other one is always a nosy one in everyone’s business so it’s natural to have him in the dining family times. During the whole lunch, you could feel two burning stares on your skin, your brothers stealing glances of you and your mother is always unaware of all these.

When going back to your room, you could feel someone is following you upstairs and you are well aware of the person, who it might be. Well, as he has promised earlier, he would definitely help you in your assignments. You didn’t mind him following but something about his stares, making you uncomfortable in your place.

Entering your room, you quickly head towards the table to gather all your required stuffs for the work while he made himself comfortable on the edge of your bed. His hands caressing the bedsheet and humming to himself with closed eyes.

“Where are you going anyways?”

You didn’t pick up his question as you are busy typing some texts in your group chat when you feel someone snatches your phone away from your grip and held it higher.

“What the hell? Give it back to me Jaemin. You are here to help me not to irritate me.”

“I was asking you a question but you just ignored me and was busy on this useless thing.”

“I was texting someone and I’m sorry that I didn’t hear you.”

He glanced to the phone in his hand, which was still raised above and squinting his eyes, he is trying to read the messages. You could see his raised eyebrows and tongue poking his cheeks.

“You are going out with all boys?”

“That’s not your issue.”

“Did mom allow you?”

“Oh gosh. Why are you asking so many questions? Are you going to help me now or not? If not then get the fuck out of my room.”

“What help do you need exactly?”

“huh?”

You are standing on your toes to match his level to get back your phone but your feet touched the floor on hearing his words. You should not feel like this but his tone is different than before and it’s a bit more seductive and you could feel him closing the distance between you both. You step back with every proceeding of his step towards you. You bumped on the chair in front of the desk and your hands grabbed the top of it tightly in the back, you are totally trapped. He leans forward and caged you, hands gripping the desk behind.

  “Wha…what..do you need?”

He leans to your ears and his hot breath fanning over it when he whispered.

“That’s really up to you. How do you need me?”

“I need…help…in my assignment.”

“yeah and?”

He stares at your eyes in a way as if he is trying to hipnotize you.

“and?”

“Answer the rest of the questions I have asked you. Be a good girl. Will you?”

He repeated his questions while caressing your cheeks and somehow you were leaning to his touch even when you know whatever you both are doing is wrong. This is not how a brother and sister treat each other.

“I am going out with my old friends who are in this town and they want to meet with me so I will be back late at night.”

He stares at you for a few moments as if he is processing your words. Suddenly, he comes near to your face to match your eye level, staring so deeply as if he could read your past life and can possess your soul anytime. You can feel his lips just a breath away from yours and this is the first time, you are so much close to your brother, well just a reminder step-brother. Tugging your hairs slowly behind your ears, his fingers sliding over your cheeks to feel every little detail of the texture, you closed your eyes on the impact. Your heart beat increasing with every passing second and you can feel him smiling at your current state. You are hoping to end this situation quickly like you can push him or just like any other time, you can just reply him back savagely but somehow your body not reacting to do any of this rather accepting him and letting him to have his ways with you. Your thoughts got interrupted when you could feel something warm on your lips. His lips. He kissed you. It was a quick kiss as if a dream which flickered in the daylight. He steps back and brushes his hair with a smug look as if he has achieved his thing which he desired for so long.

The room is quiet. Really quiet or maybe you are suddenly deaf to your surroundings. Your bedroom is quite big but still its suffocating you at the moment as if the walls are closing in and the daylight fading out, making you a completely abandoned soul in this lively household.

But your mind is screaming that YOUR STEPBROTHER HAS JUST KISSED YOU.

“Earth to Y/N.”

You were so distracted that you didn’t notice how your fingers are touching your lips as if you are judging whether those are real or fake or if it yours in the first place. Looking over to the person, you can see him already has arranged everything for your work and smirking at you, sitting on the bed. As if nothing happened just few seconds back.

“….Jaemin…why….”

“Don’t you need my help anymore? You know I can help you in every possible way but till then lets focus on this. Come here.”

How can you just go near him again after what happened earlier? But him pretending like this as if he didn’t kiss his sister few minutes earlier and now like a big brother offering his help for homework for his little sister. With slow steps, you went near the side of the bed to which he pats the space beside him and hesitantly, you sit there.

One and a half hour has passed with you being stuck with him in your room doing your assignment. Every moment was torturing you as if every minute was passing like an hour with him. His every lingering touch was igniting a spike inside you like while him showing you how to solve a math problem and while peeking into the laptop, his palm resting over your exposed leg, your mind was focusing on everything except your work. You were trying your best to divert your mind from all the unholy thoughts that were going across your mind every second, but nothing was helping when his presence was so close to you.

“I know what you are thinking right now but only if you didn’t have to go out with your friends then we could have done something you know.”

“What?”

“You know what I meant?”

You just want to punch off that smirk from his face but you don’t want to create more memories of spending time with him for so long for the first time in your room so you just have to patiently handle the situation right now.

“Jaemin, the thing for which you were here is done so now you can go out because I have to get ready. Its not like you can help me in that.”

“I can.”

“Very funny.”

His smug look changes into a dark expression and you swear, him in this contrast look is something which scares you off the most even scarier than Jeno. That one has always that grumpy and intense look so you are used to it but when this flirt becomes like him, a shiver runs down your spine. His soft expressions always hide those bulky muscled body with veins on display on hands and necks. You never had a proper look of their abs but you hope to see the effects of the gym though. Like whenever, they swipe their hairs after having fun in the swimming pool, you would always stare at their muscles and face but you just divert your eyes whenever the abs come in display to you. Your fault to miss the free shows.

“Nothing is funny here baby. As I said I would help you means I will definitely. Now show me what you got baby.”

“Jaemin-“

He walks over to your closet and before you could protest, he slides open the door standing there with raised eyebrows and smiling face.

“You have quite a good collection of……everything.”

You hurriedly go in front of him and shut it close on his smirking face, eyes scanning your body to which you just glared him back. But well Jaemin didn’t budge to it, he goes to the next door and now it revealed the actual dress section not your lingerie and undies.

You observed his actions keenly to understand his motives. You can see him having his whole focus into your closet and you walk over to the bed to sit on it and watch him. Is it because of the kiss or for spending so much time with him that suddenly you are finding his whole existence as a blessing in your life?

His pretty eyelash making his eyes more attractive when they are focused on anything. His smooth skin with attractive nose and lips with that pretty smile. Did I just mention his smile pretty? Well not gonna lie however that smile irritates you but you find it really cute, a healing one. Your university friends have mentioned about your stepbrothers being so hot and handsome and they even pointed out that if they were in your place, they might have ended up dating them instead of maintaining the brother and sister image. But you are sure that those things are never going to happen between you and your stepbrothers maybe because you might find them attractive but its not like that’s the same from their end. Right?

“Take this. Give me a show and let me see in which one you will look the prettiest.”

“Are you serious right now?”

“100 percent.”

He is standing in front of you with few clothes in his hands and as far as you can see those are some skirt, shirt, tees, one denim jeans and two dresses. The way he is grinning at you as if he is an elementary school boy who got his long-awaited present. Wait. He got his present. What the hell I am thinking?

“There is no need of this. I can choose myself.”

Putting the clothes beside you, he holds your hand to pull you up on your feet and pats your cheek with both the hands, still having that smile on his face.

“Be a good girl or you wont be going out today. Alright?”

“You cant be serious.”

“Till the time I’m being nice to you just go with it or you have to regret it.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well I will not look while you are changing so after you have dressed yourself in one, ask me to turn around.”

“But-“

“What did I just say?”

“…okay…”

He went over to your desk and sat on the chair with one hand leaning over the desk and other hand handling the phone, keeping himself busy. You kept standing near the other side of the bed still staring at the clothes lying over your bed. Am I really going to do this? What did he mean by being nice and you have to regret? Shaking off your thoughts, you cautiously dressed yourself in the skirt and a matching shirt he has selected with it. His every little movement was making you freeze in your spot. Changing your dress in presence of your step-brother in closed room is really challenging even more when he kissed you earlier. You look over to the mirror and damn, he has a good sense in fashion. You smiled to your outfit and then remember that you have to ask him to turn around.

Gulping, you call out his name, “jae-Jaemin…I’m ready.”

He quickly swivels on the chair to face you and eyes directly made a strong contact with yours before scanning your outfit. His furrowed eyebrows and thoughtful expression making you to adjust your dress properly.

“No. Change it. Keep the shirt on but wear the jeans.”

Before turning around, he winks at you. Your glare was digging hole in the back of his head but it was useless as he would not budge with that little thing.

“Stop glaring at me and change. Do it fast. I’m sure, you don’t want to be late or like miss out today’s outing.”

He is still turning his back to you but you could feel his smug look mocking at you. Kicking your feet, you quickly changed your skirt with the pant. The previous look was giving off a sexy and cute look altogether but this one is suggesting tumblr fashion. Calling out his name again, he stands up and comes near to you. Your heart starts racing with the thought what happened when last time he came to you like this.

“stop there.”

But he didn’t.

“I said stop. Don’t come near to me.”

He again ignored and when he is just a feet away. His hand goes to the button of your pant. Your eyes go wide and hands reacting fast enough to hold his but he was faster than you. Swatting your hands away, he pulls the zipper up.

“What? Did you think I am going to do something to you? Aha not like this. Or maybe you thought…..” He leans to your ears, “ I will kiss you again.”

He steps back and precisely takes a look of your form. Nodding to himself, he pats your head and your confused expression made a chuckle out of him.

“That’s looking good on you. You are going out with all boys and I cant trust them. Maybe they can be your old friends but without having contacts with them for so long and you don’t know how would they behave later so better be like this.”

“It’s not like for them I need to dress up accordingly.”

“of course not. You can wear anything when either me and Jeno is there with you but not when you will be all alone.”

“Why is it okay with both of you?”

“I can fight with others for you. Jeno will do the same.”

Going over to the dressing table, you pulled out all the make up kit while talking with him and him admiring your every features as if you are his treasured person. Maybe you are.

“Jeno would rather sell me to them rather than fighting for me.’

“You are wrong there baby. Absolutely wrong. He would burn the world for you but never let any harm on you.”

“Anyways I will leave you here. Do your makeup and have fun tonight but not too much. Remember about what I have told you.”

You keep on staring at your reflection on the mirror with shiny edges after he shuts the door behind, leaving your room. His words clouding all over your mind and his actions playing repeatedly making you groan in frustration. All these types of situations are not usual between the relationship between a brother and a sister and whatever is going to happen later, you must face it with your confidence and true feelings. Patting your cheeks to get yourself off these overthinking and resume your makeup. It took almost one hour when you finished your makeup, its not like you were doing any heavy look but the problem was you were continuously getting distracted when the thought of Jaemin playing across your mind. Glancing at the clock, its almost six in the evening and you should probably leave right now to be there on time. Collecting all the necessary stuffs, you made your way downstairs. Adjusting your smart watch, a message popped up that few have arrived on the location and you need to be there soon.

“Are you ready? Let’s go.”

“Hm….wait!...you? Where are you going?”

“To the place you are going.”

“Why?”

Rolling his eyes, he slides his jacket and fishes his phone inside the pocket of his jeans. Frowning you, still staring at him as if why he is tagging along with you to the place. Before exiting the house, he finds you still standing at the same spot and staring back at him, he rolls his eyes before stepping towards you. Your panic arises watching him coming towards you, you tried to think some possible attempts to escape it but before you could do anything, he catches your wrist and drags you towards the door.

“Jeno…What are you doing?”

“Stop being dramatic. I’m just taking you to your friends.”

“I can go on my own. You… you don’t have to…take me there.”

Reaching near the garage, he takes you to his car. The person whose presence, you try to avoid with every possibility and now you will be riding a car with him. Jaemin has given you ride to and from college a lot of times and that’s how some thought that he was your boyfriend and even Jaemin always has that smug expression on hearing those comments. But you never went anywhere alone with Jeno and if your heart could burst today, it should by now because of the events unfolding after the lunch. Jeno is texting on his phone and your eyes following how his clenched jaws moving with veins popping at the side profile, on his neck disappearing behind the collar of the jackets. He caught you staring at him and that smirk made an appearance on his attractive and sharp face. But. Wait, he is really attractive, a lot more handsome than you have thought of him before. Any girl should drool over this man if he ever proposes them. Maybe you too if he was not your brother, well step-brother.

With slow steps as if he is the predator cornering his prey. Why suddenly they are like this today? I should probably stay at my friend’s house tonight. You try to open the door of the car but to your dismay, it got stuck, you shake it aggressively but it didn’t budge.

“It will break like this. It’s locked sweetheart.”

“Oh…”

You have not turned around but could feel his presence just behind you. Your back flushed against his front. His hands resting against the car, caging you in between, lips near your ears, hot breath tickling your lobe, goosebumps spreading all over your skin.

“Why you always ignoring me?”

You remained quiet. Fingers tangling with the strap of the sling bag in nervousness and his strong smell of cologne hitting your nose clouding your every attempt to push him and run away as you are going to be late.

His one hand grabs your jaw to turn your face to meet your eyes. His eyes blinks to your lips before raising up to meet yours which is covered with glittery makeup.

“I asked you something. You should answer it right?”

You nod to his raised eyebrows.

“Words sweetheart.”

His husky voice and him so close to your body is enough to make you weak in your knees.

“I am not ignoring you.”

“Don’t lie. I don’t like when you lie. Its very obvious how you always leave the scene whenever I come near you but still you are okay with Jaemin.”

“Jeno…I…I’m late…I need to go.”

“Dammit. Look, you are trying to avoid me again. You always have these excuses to avoid me. Why? Am I worse than jaemin?”

He turns you around, pushing you against the car, still caging you between his arms. Eyes daringly staring at you, veins more visible on his forehead and around his throat and neck. You got the chance to have a look of this handsome face so closely for the first time and you are already getting attracted to it even when your consciousness is screaming ‘he is your stepbrother.’

“He might be always sweet to you and shows his flirty side to you but mark my words, he is worse than me. You don’t know what he can do if he ever gets a chance to get you alone and fuck you. His mischievous innocent smile hides all his nasty thoughts and his devil side from you.”

“What are you saying jeno?”

“Don’t pretend that you don’t know how you always tease us when roaming around the house like a little slut you are. It’s good that Jaemin has decided your outfit otherwise who knows what you have worn to meet all those shitheads.”

“Excuse me, they are my friends.”

He steps back and pulls you towards him making you bump into his front. The sound from the car, indicating the unlock of your ride made a surprised squeal from you. Pulling the door open, he offers you to enter his car.

“Have a seat princess. We have a little way to go.”

Without wasting any time, you hurriedly go inside it and shut the door to which he chuckles on your little attempt. He strikingly walks towards the other side to enter the driver seat and as soon as he enters, he brushes his hair, looking in the rear mirror. Gulping, you cast a glance to him and well you find it really attractive whenever one of your brothers do this. Afterall both of them are just walking models.

As soon as you both make an eye contact in the mirror, he smirks and you look out of the window to avoid his gaze.

“How much you try, You are stuck with me inside this little space.”

Leaning towards you, supporting his hand on your seat and the other on the steering wheel.

“You have nowhere to go except appreciating my presence.”

“Jeno…what are you doing?”

He pulls the seat belt before you protest to his further attempts to do anything, fixing it properly, he sighs and smirks at you. As he goes back to do the same for him, you release a heavy breath to the thought that nothing happened like Jaemin.

You remained quiet the whole ride and did your best to keep yourself busy on the phone to avoid any conversation with him. But Jeno is not the one to keep it this way as finally he got the chance with you and that’s also all alone in his car. He kept you asking few questions and when you denied to reply him back, everytime he slides his hands up and down your thighs.

“Don’t be a bad girl, princess.”

The ride to your destination was quick as you all were going to meet in the nearest mall to hangout and have fun with catching up all the gossips you are missing out. He didn’t park the car because he has to go to the office to meet his dad after dropping you off at your place.

“Thanks…thanks for the ride…Jeno.”

Your hands reach over to the handle to push the door open but before the impact, he grips your wrist and pinned you down to your seat. Your eyes go wide when he is almost hovering on top of you, his eyes reading all your little changes in the expression.

“I can’t lose to Jaemin here.”

And with that, he crashes his lips onto yours. The afternoon kiss with the other one was a quick and soft but this one is rough but like he has the whole time of the universe for himself and slowly he is sucking your whole soul. You didn’t kiss back but you push him. Taking heavy breathes, you take a look yourself in the mirror but he grips your jaw and turns to face him. His other hand placing your hairs properly and then wipes the smudged lipstick stain from your face and rubbing it on his lips

“Now it’s perfect.”

He gives you his eye smile. Cute.

As soon as he turns around to open his door, you quickly got out of the car before he could speak up anything more.

The whole evening went with having a lot of delicious foods and having fun at karaoke and arcades. Well, you caught up on lots of funny rumors of your old classmates, many dating scandals and other spicy gossips. It was really great to catch up with your old friends. You were distracted from the thought of your brothers most of the time but everytime a scene comes across your mind, suddenly you would become quiet.

“Y/N, are you okay?”

“Of course.”

You all cant understand because it’s not like you are getting kissed by your brothers everyday. Also, by both of them on the same day.

And you just know, you have to keep all these as secrets from the parents because if they find out about it, you don’t know what would happen after and again you don’t want to ruin your mother’s happy life.

When it was already late at night, you texted your mother that you would be home soon and one of your friends might drop you off to your house and she agreed with it. Your father also texted you to be safe on your way. But two people were not happy with you being out for so long. You had numerous calls from your brothers but you just kept it in silent. It’s not like you haven’t received once. You had answered few of their calls and explained about your ride back home but they were stuck with one sentence.

“We will pick you up. Just tell us when we need to pick you up.”

But you dared to ignore their protest and still asked one of friends to drop you off at home.

Everyone waved off their goodbyes and it’s you and Jongho while going towards the parking area.

“it was really nice to see you after so many months.”

“Same here. I didn’t know that nerdy gummy bear is now a great man.”

“Well I am now and I can protect you as well.”

“Thank you.” You both giggled on his words.

“There wont be a need for you to protect her.”

Why? Cant atleast the night end peacefully? You both turned around to the voice and Jongho frown to see two unfamiliar faces glaring back at him.

“Who are you? Y/N, do you know them?”

“She is not likely to be answerable to your every question when we are here you know.”

And that sassy voice made his appearance out from the dark space of the parking lot. Hands folded in front and eyes sending daggers to your friend.

“Hello there mister. Myself Jaemin. A lot more handsome and sexy person than you.”

Before Jongho could protest anything, Jaemin grip your wrist and start dragging you towards the car where you could already see someone sitting in the driver’s space. He has not come alone. That means Jeno is also there. Turning your face, you send a reassuring smile that you are fine and you waved him goodbye and told him to have a safe ride back home. Unlike you.

“Jaemin, leave my hand. I can walk.”

He ignores your every word and proceeds to walk towards the car. He harshly opens the passenger seat door and pushes you inside. Without any complaint, you swiftly go inside and he shuts the door. He goes in the backseat when your focus falls on Jeno’s hand gripping the steering wheel tightly, knuckles turning white and veins popping attractively on his arms, he is not wearing the jacket from previously and shirt sleeves are folded.

“Why didn’t you pick up the calls?”

“I told you before that I could have gone back with Jongho.”

Jaemin interjects.

“so? Haven’t I told you before that I don’t trust your friends?”

“That’s your problem. I trust my friends.”

“You-“

Jeno darkly chuckles. “Jaemin, let it go. She doesn’t know that we know how to tame brats like her.”

“What?”

“Ah sure Jeno.”

That’s how you were bombarded with lot of questions during the ride back home about your whole day.

The following next week, you were doing your best to avoid being near to them. But they have the total opposite thing on their mind. Their motive was to follow you like the lost puppy the whole day. The worst thing was that they would make some worst excuses sometimes and not let you to leave for any kind of parties and meet ups. It was okay to go out for any day-out fun but not night. Surprisingly, your parents were also agreeing with them and appreciating the fact that how they were showing their concern for their only sister.

If only they knew, how they actually treat you.

With the passing of days, you can feel their eyes are more lingering on your body. Their intense pervert gaze to which you glare them back but one either blinks at you or the other smirks at you confidently. You were nothing less as you would also check them out whenever they are unaware of your presence and not to lie, you are getting attracted to them more with every passing time, you are getting more proper close up look of their bare face with raw and groggy voice each morning and sometimes when you come across with each other during midnight.

And then this day when suddenly, your parents have to leave for a vacation business trip for a couple of months and that means. THAT MEANS YOU WILL BE ALONE WITH YOUR BROTHERS THE WHOLE DAY. EVERY DAY. You begged your mother to take you with her but she waved you off telling how childish and stupid you sound like. You almost spilled out the actual reason but regained your composure to keep the secret.

So you made a plan to spend few days at your friends house and maybe you should plan out some more hangouts so you don’t have to face your brothers. And that’s how, you are making your way out of the house to meet your dearest friend but maybe that’s not how smooth your life is meant to be.

“Where do you think you are going?”

Only one more step and you would have been out of the house but not today. Gulping, you clutched the door handle tightly in your fist and turned around to face the owner of the voice. It’s not like the person is anyhow unfamiliar to you or someone you are scared of. Well, yeah the person who you want to avoid rather you should unless you want to be in a big trouble. Turning around on your heel, you kept your gaze on the floor, suddenly finding it the most beautiful and appreciable thing in your life. You could feel the approaching footsteps but not daring to look up because why will you when you are damn aware of the person before you. Your panic state didn’t go unnoticed by the approaching person. Now, you could smell the cologne of the man and the close proximity between you two was making your mind scream loudly inside. Two fingers brushing your cheeks sliding down to your chin and grabbed it, forcing you to look up. Due to the sudden impact, you closed your eyes, still could hear the chuckle left from his lips. Even when your eyes are closed, you could still feel the well built muscular body towering over you. Another hand brushed your hairs and tugged them behind your eyes. Your heart racing and mind screaming but you just wanted to run away from the current situation.

“Open your eyes baby.”

No. Please let me go out. You were mentally begging him to let you go but nothing was coming out of your throat and so you just gulped the lump. Not reacting to his words, he gripped your jaw tightly and you could feel his breath fanning over your lips. You tried to bend backwards but his other hand placed on your lower back pulled you closer towards him.

“Didn’t you hear what I said? Open your eyes. Let me see the pretty eyes of my baby.”

His voice was a lot more dominative than before and you didn’t want to make him mad so you slowly parted your eyelids. Eyes couldn’t focus on his face due to the fact that you were closing them so tightly previously and also this man being so close to you that lights couldn’t make up the image properly for your eyes. Flattering your eyelashes, you were then staring to those attractively seductive eyes as it could hipnotiza you. Anyone could have felt weak for these eyes and him in such situation including you but not when he being your brother. Well, correctly stepbrother. You were damn aware of the treatment that a step brother should have for his little sister but in your case, nothing was near to that fact check. You were literally living with two damn tease who constantly stir up every situation to flirting and teasing.

“Did you ask us before leaving?”

“I- I was just going to tell you.”

“Really? It doesn’t look like that. It was as if you were going somewhere else to avoid us tonight. Is there any reason?”

You were trying to voice out some words but the way his fingers were brushing over your lower lips. Oh gosh! It’s not helping your condition.

“Answer him.”

Okay! Time to leave now. The only thing I have to do is to push the man in front of me and quickly run out of the door before the other one can descend the stairs. Eyes dancing on their forms, mentally you counted to three and you pushed him. He got startled due to your sudden action but was quick to catch your hands.

“Step one more. You will regret it later so much.”

“Someone is being a stubborn today, you know.”

“Where was she going Jaemin?”

You could see him smirking on his brother’s question before replying to him, he winked at you with lips sending a flying kiss to you. The biggest tease in the household. You glared at him and when you looked at the other one, he was already glaring at you darkly with clenched jaw. But you were getting distracted how his biceps were well reflected under the bright lights because of his black sleeveless tee.

“I was asking her that before you made your entry on our private time. Jeno got no jam.”

“Shut up Jaemin. You are literally standing at the entrance in a massive hall and saying private time.”

“But there is no one around.”

“I am here. Well, getting back to her. It’s past curfew time and where is she going even all dolled up.”

Both of them expecting an answer from you, waiting for your reply but you chose to remain quiet. You tried to wiggle your hand out of his grip but he held it tighter and Jeno was satisfied with his brother’s act. You stared at the older one who had already seated himself comfortably on the sofa and staring back at you both, gesturing his brother to pull you towards him.

“I was just going somewhere.”

“Where?” Jeno asked with a lot more husky voice.

“T-to to meet someone.”

“Now?” Jaemin with a frown on his face turned towards you.

“Yeah….”

“Who?”

You looked towards Jeno before thinking twice as it would be safe to tell them or not but you chose death.

“My boyfriend.”

“Since when do you have one?”

“We are just going to meet today to get along with each other so he invited me to his house for a sleepover. He is my old friend.”

“And you thought without telling us, it would be fine for you to just sneak out of the house and have fun.”

“No Jeno look I-“

You didn’t notice when Jaemin went behind and wrapped his arms around you to hold you flushed to him. His nose snuggling into your wavy locks on your shoulder and neck.

Whispering ‘baby’ ‘pretty’ ‘princess’ in your ears, breathe tingling over. But the next thing he whispered made your eyes went wide.

“Tell him you can’t make it today.”

Jeno read your actions precisely and noticing how you pressed your legs together, his brother’s every little action was getting a reaction out from you. Honestly, he was enjoying the view more than he could describe but the moment your eyes went wide, the corner of his lips rose on knowing what was the possible reason behind that. Moreover, he found everything cute.

“Do it. Whatever he is telling you, work it.”

“No no I can’t.” Jaemin’s grip was strong and the way both of them hit the Gym, you were well aware that you couldn’t stand any chance in front of them.

“You can do this but you can’t go out.”

“Please.”

“Call him yourself or I’m going to do it. What do you want?”

Snatching your purse from the hand, he hurriedly rummages into it to find your phone. Found it, unlocking the phone, he went through all your contacts and text messages until he found out your precious friend. How come he knows my password?

Dialing the number, he kept the phone in front of you with speaker on. You could see your reflection with your stepbrother on that tiny screen. Suddenly the screen turned on, and someone spoke from the other side.

“Hello?”

“Hey! Jongho….”

Even when you were talking with your friend, you made a straight eye contact with those daring eyes of jeno in front of you holding your phone. Jaemin was still in his world, inhaling your body scent as if you were a drug that he was missing out all these days. Your voice cracked when you felt him leaving kisses over your exposed shoulder.

“When are you coming Y/N?”

Before you could reply, jeno mouthed you to say what they wanted to hear from you. He raised his eyebrows when you remained quiet.

“Sorry but I don’t think ......I can go today.”

“What happened? Is everything alright? Do I need to come over for help?”

“No no it’s just mild headache. You don’t have to worry much.”

Jeno came closer to you and tracing his fingers through your face before pressing them on your lips. You averted your eyes away.

Jaemin whispered in between biting your earlobe, “eyes on him baby.”

You somehow managed to do so until the third voice interrupted.

“Please take care and let me know if you need something.”

You replied with a low ‘hmm’ before he cut the line and tossing the phone on the sofa.

“Now leave me. Let me go.”

“Now where are you planning to go? Didn’t Jeno said earlier it’s already past curfew time?”

“Both of you have already ruined my night. Now Atleast let me go to my room. So, move!”

Both of them chuckled on your reply and you creased your eyebrows in confusion, wiggling under their hold and gaze. Finding your actions cute, they started laughing.

“Why are you laughing?”

“You said you can’t make it tonight so let us make that excuse valid. Right Jaemin?”

“Of course, Jeno.”

“What do you mean?”

“I can do this all night baby, Make a wish.” Jaemin licked and whispered in your ears, biting the earlobe before retreating his mouth.

Jeno leaned down to match your eye level.

“Let’s keep it a secret before you can unfold what’s coming in your way.”

“no. look. Jeno…Jaemin…I- I…”

“What?”

“baby…just follow us and you will love it for sure.”

You know whatever is going to happen is something that should not been like this but the way your body is already turned on is basically denying your thoughts to stop everything right on the spot. You followed them to their game room, that’s the only common room they share whenever they have game nights with their friends. You haven’t entered this room anytime before and exploring everything new today is really exciting you. Exploring their new self will be lot more exciting to you.

As soon as you and Jaemin entered the room, Jeno shut the door behind and that’s how you know, you have to block every other thoughts which screaming to you to back off but yet here you are challenging their offer. Well not offer but you want to see how far they can go. Are you so irresistible to them?

Jaemin took you to the middle of the room, throwing your purse away and cupping your face and neck with both of his hands and pulls you closer. Eyes scanning every detail of your face, admiring your beauty even when he sees you everyday but not like this when turned on and your body radiating heat on his bare palm. With few blinks of his eyes, he closes the distance between your lips. Well, that soft human is nowhere to be found but a hungry demon feasting on his last meal as the way his teeth sucking your lips. Teeth clashing with each other, hands gripping tightly on your neck leaving marks but you are not protesting against rather you accept the doing and kissing him back. You can feel a different set of handles fondling with your dress back zipper and within few seconds, the zip goes down, the dress still hanging on your body but hands snaking from behind around your waist.

You part your lips from Jaemin to take breath when jeno speak from behind you, face snuggling into your shoulders and collar bone, inhaling your scent.

“Can I?”

You don’t even know what he’s asking with the groan lacing with the question, yet you nod in compliance. Jaemin averts your attention towards him by turning your face in his hands, nose nudging against yours before he kisses you. His lips are soft and warm, and you’re genuinely enjoying  how excellent he is at kissing. You again got lost in him devouring you, hands around his neck as to bring him closer.

You’re not sure how long you’ve been kissing for, only until Jeno tugs on your hair and pulls you out of your trance. You whimper when you’re parted from Jaemin, who smirks at the noise, hands entangled with yours.

“Don’t be a jerk right now, Jaemin” Jeno growls, pulling your back to his front as he moves to your neck. You moan when his tongue licks a juicy stripe up your neck, hands roaming around your body, the heated body coming in contact with the cold air of the room making your whole body shiver under their warm touch. Jeno tugging your dress upwards, leaving your thighs bare and exposed to Jaemin whose eyes following every movement the dress is revealing more inch of your skin from underneath.

Jeno kisses you hungrily like a beast. Jaemin’s kiss was intense but this kiss is everything but soft. His grip on you and kiss, both are rough. He is holding you as if a slight loose in the grip will make you fade away and the same goes for the kiss. He doesn’t bite you rough but little gently, yet making you bleed slightly. Your whine and moans to his actions are like musics to his ears.

“Ah, you’re so fucking perfect,” Jeno hisses, fingers inching closer to your core. “Make you whimper under me all night and can listen to your moans all night.”

“I know we have all night and I can see her like this for the rest,” you hear Jaemin with his sassy voice. “But I want to have my donut with the jam in the middle.”

You were so distracted with Jeno attached to your neck and one hand playing with your clothed breasts that you didn’t notice his other hand slides your panty enough to get a proper access to your core and dips a finger inside which let out a loud moan from inside your throat. Both of them smirk in satisfaction.

Before he can slides a second finger in, Jaemin bent down to lace his mouth with your other left out breast. He pulls the dress down to free it from the cover and quickly takes the nipple between his teeth, sucking and pulling it softly but enough to make you whimper to the effect. You know you should not enjoy this whole thing but yet here you are feeling yourself floating in cloud 9.

“She feels good, her soft skin, her seductive scent is driving me crazy” Jeno speak in a low tone still audible to the whole room, lips trailing kisses all over your neck, shoulders and collarbone, biting in between, ripping soft screams and sobs out of you. “What do you think we should do, Jaemin ?”

“Everything,” he chuckles, tongue flicking over your nipple and other nipple being rolled around between the fingers of Jeno, tugging it slightly. “I want to have her in every way I have dreamed and thought every second whenever she walks around the house in tees without any bra.”

You fail to register his words as Jeno increase his pace inside you, fingers pumping in and out of your pussy along with the tortures going on to your nipples.

“Get her on the bed,” Jeno says. “I want her to see breaking down under me and let’s see how she will escape me like other days.”

Jaemin pulls you away from Jeno just to push you against the bed. You whine on losing contact in your heated mound. Your messed up body hits the well knitted soft bedsheet, surrounded by all the neon lights to create a gaming environment but today’s game is whole lot different from other days. It’s the game you have wanted to play with them. Always.

You feel a tap on your cheek and you glance up to see Jaemin sitting beside you, smiling with eyes filled with lust. His fingers brush your lips, “no matter how long I kiss you, I won’t get enough of you.”

You are distracted with the angel sitting beside you whose deeds are totally of a devil, your eyes following how he pecks your nose before attaching his mouth to your nipples and to the effect, you close your eyes tightly, feeling the moment intently.

You feel someone slide your panty down your legs but still keeping your heels on and dress fondled over your stomach. You feel harsh slap against your pussy and then when you look down to see Jeno eyeing your core hungrily and his look is enough to make you wet more, he eyes your arousal leaking out of you, groaning with the scene. Your attempt to close your legs got stuck when he holds tightly the thighs apart and darkly looks at you.

“Be a good girl for me, princess.”

You nod and grips the bedsheet and other hand in Jaemin’s hair , tugging them extracting groans of pain but him not stopping you from doing it.

“Shit!” Jeno curses when he licks a long stripe of your arousal and your back arches, pushing the chest to Jaemin’s mouth. He has that smug look on his face to have you like this and knows well how his brother is making you feel good. “you taste so heavenly, baby.”

Before you can register the words, Jeno again attaches his mouth to your heat and sucks it harshly, fingers digging into your skin leaving marks making it too obvious for others to know how you got those bruises. The abuse on your tits and mound is taking to your climax slowly. You can feel the coil tightening inside your stomach and Jaemin could feel it with your body movements

“My baby, you are mine,” Jaemin praising you continuously but the way he is constantly biting uour nipples and leaving marks all over the chest and throat is really contrasting his sweet voice. “Doing so good for us.”

‘How can that mouth do two opposite things together.”

You see white when Jeno wraps his mouth around your clit, sucking harshly at the nub. You hit the climax immediately as soon as he presses his palm above the stomach and Jaemin pulls your both the nipples. Jeno licks every last drop of your cum but didn’t intend to end the abuse.

“Stop it…jeno…”

Even when you cum, he didn’t stop but keep on licking the clit, overstimulating you and to which your back arches and the view is heavenly for Jaemin.

“Fuck, you’re so hot.”Jaemin hisses, admiring your chest going up and down with heavy breathings and pained expression due to overstimulation. While keeping his eyes on you, he slowly unbuckles his belt, pushing the pants and boxers down to expose his hard and thick cock. He smiles at your glazed eyes, pumping himself a few times and you know that this smile is hiding all the possible monstrous activities.

Jeno pushes two of his fingers and you nearly scream out his name with the feeling of his tongue still fucking you and in addition of his two fingers scissoring inside you.

Jaemin moves down his hand to your clit and starts to rub the bud. This is too much for you. His actions are going parallel with one hand rubbing the clit and other one rubbing the nipple in the same pace. The second orgasm with two of them abusing you came too fast and your whole body is covered with sweats and exhaustion but this is the only beginning.

Jaemin pushes Jeno aside while the latter laughed to see his brother’s impatience and well he would have been the same if it was otherwise.

“I want to taste you too but let me first fuck you and feel this tiny hole around my cock.”

“Are you going to wear a condom?” You ask in a weak tone.

Jaemin laughs. “We don’t need one, baby.”

“What?”

You both moan together when he pushes himself inside, stretching your cunt with his cock. You cry out at the brief feeling of pain before you feel Jeno placing his lips over yours. Jaemin’s deep voice is making you clench around his cock. Feeling it, he grabs your ass tightly, leaving red fingerprints.

“Doing so well for us, princess,” he murmurs against your mouth. “Such a pretty angel for me.”

“Not only yours but….but mine too.”

“Did I complain when you called her your baby so just shut up and fuck her.”

Pain shifts into pleasure as Jaemin presses his palm above your clit, fingers circling around the nub. You can feel his cock is driving up into your stomach and hitting it with the force of his thrusts. He continues to maintain his pace till he hits the desired spot to make you scream out his name.

“JAEMIN!”

“That’s it,” he chuckles, slapping your pussy and cock hitting into that spot over and over.

You feel Jeno’s breath ghosting over your ear. Jeno licking your ears and groaning while playing with your nipples letting the familiar neediness building inside you all over again and the coil might explode before reaching the climax. The licking sound into your ears and the wet sounds coming from the down where Jaemin hitting your g-spot is enough to make you feel like the most special and enchanted person to them. Well it’s not only your thought but you are like a dreamy angel to them while all spread out like this on the bed, everything exposed and on display only for them to devour on it.

You approach your third orgasm of the day when Jaemin hits the spot with a deep thrust , your body is overwhelmed as both of them giving all of their attention to you as you are like a goddess spread in front of them to whom they got access after so many attempts.Jaemin groans loudly when you clench around him, he soon reached his high and bends down to peck your lips still buried inside you. You nearly got pass out by the intensity of your orgasm and the feeling of him emptying his seeds inside of you. You’ve never had sex before with someone and your stepbrothers being your first is something so different to imagine. Jaemin feeling you up and without any protection is clouding your mind with different feelings but got interrupted by him.

“Shit,” Jaemin curses before smiling up at you and looking towards his brother . “Her pussy is so fucking good. I want to have her again.”

Your blissed out expression while whimpering his name and shaking uncontrollably under him when he was fucking you is still replaying in his mind. Your bouncing tits when he was pushing inside you with his faster pace and the pleasure filled face when you approached your high when he hit your sweet spot was enough for him.It is driving him crazy and not letting you go away from him and wanting to fuck you to the brim until you pass out like this.

“Let me have my turn now, Jaemin,” Jeno with annoyance in his voice reminds his brother, but he’s immediately shoved away by Jaemin.

“No please let me have one more round.”

“You had your fun. It’s my turn now. Move before I just lock you out of the room.”

“Fine,” Jaemin rolls his eyes before pulling himself out and getting off the bed to change the position with Jeno and you find Jeno again between your legs.

“I’ll take her ass later and you can’t deny it then.”

“Fine.”

“W-What?” You stammer. Later? What do they mean?

“Don’t worry, baby,” Jeno assures you. “It’ll feel good, you just have to trust us. You can be a good girl for us tonight right?”

“How can I trust?”

“Why?”

“I don’t know but my brothers fucking me already breaking the trust of us being siblings-“

“Shut up. We are not siblings. Only me and Jaemin are legal brothers and you are our step sister not our own blood. But ours. You are ours.”

“Yes Jeno is right. No one can take you away from us. Even if people point out us being step siblings, I will fucking cut their hands down.”

Jeno smirks, “maybe burn them alive.”

They leave you no room to protest as Jeno turns you around, face hitting the pillow and his strong grip pulling your ass up, aligning with the tip of his cock. When he freed himself from the boxers, you could feel the pain spread all over your body as you have never seen such big cock, it’s thicker than Jaemin’s and you don’t think it can fit inside you, letting aside in your ass where you never had slid a single finger and rest alone this cock.

“I-I don’t think I’m r-ready for this-“

“You are,” Jeno soothes. “Don’t worry.”

“No no please. I’m already tired and this is…I don’t think I can…stop it Jeno.”

You barely get a chance to stop him as Jaemin pinned your hand to your back which were trying to reach jeno to make him stop. Jaemin kisses your head to soothe you and ease the tensed body.

“Relax. Relax your muscles. You are perfectly made for us and by now we know what your body can take and upto how much.”

“Jaemin, first make her feel at ease or it will hurt her in a worst way.”

Jaemin hums softly in your ear. “You’re going to feel so good, my baby.”

You nod with eyes tight closed and Jaemin smiles while parting your head. Jeno spread and covered the hole with lube before sliding himself into you. As soon as Jeno entered to your back, you could feel a tear slide down your face when Jaemin wipes it off with a finger.

“You’re so fucking tight,”Jeno groans and his groggy voice letting out a moan from you. “Her ass is clenching around me and also sucking me in slowly..”

Your moans getting lost into the pillow and muffled noises could be heard when he is pounding inside you. Jaemin let go off tour hands when he feels you would no longer protest and the hands fell on both of your sides weakly. Jeno noticed it and a proud smile with a self satisfaction blooms inside him. They have totally wreck you under them inside their closed room. Your exhaustion visible on your face and seeing that Jeno increase his pace,

“Hang on for a little more, baby. I promise it’ll feel good.”

You gasp when Jeno’s cock hitting every inch of the hole and making your body squirm under him boosting his self esteem at your reactions. He gathers some of Jaemin’s cum leaking out of your entrance and rubs your clit.

“Such a pretty princess. You’re gonna feel good, baby, the way am loving to see tears straining and messing up with your make up ” he soothes you again and the way his pace is uneven you know he is near to his climax.

The stretch is so painful and tears continuously falling down your face at the feeling.

“So good, you’re doing so good.” Jeno praises.

Jaemin who’s presence was absent for a while spoke up.

“If I was not there to catch you while sneaking out of the house then you would have miss all these fun.”

Jeno’s hand sliding up and down your bare back to soothe your tensed muscles and also messaging the ass. With few thrusts, you both come undone.

Still buried deep inside, he leans down to leave feathery kisses on all over your back and praising in between. You feel someone removing your hairs from the face while patting your cheeks gently. You hum in response.

“Are you with us Y/N?”

“No more…please…I can’t.”

Jeno pulls himself out and Jaemin make you sit up and quickly changing your place from the bed on his lap. They rip away all the loosely hanging clothing from your body along with your heels.

“This one is last baby.”

“N-No,” you protest, body feeling completely exhausted. “I can’t. Please, I can’t.”

Jeno sits in front of you, cupping your face and pecking your forehead, nose and lips, “I told you to trust us. You will feel good and you are still being a good girl for us. It’ll be quick.”

While Jeno was distracting you, Jaemin’s lubed finger enters your hole to prepare and it’s still tight after being stretched out from Jeno. With a satisfied stretch, he signals Jeno to hold you down while he enters you and as soon as he slides himself inside, you scream out but Jeno shushes you with the kiss. This kiss is a gentle kiss unlike before and it is really distracting you from the pain which is slowly shifting into pleasure. Jaemin’s hand finds your pussy and dips a finger inside to collect your leaking cum. With few thrust when he has milked his fingers enough, he brings them to his lips to taste them and groans in pleasure.

“You were right Jeno. She is delicious.”

Not letting you to keep up with their conversation when Jeno slides himself to your entrance and you nearly sob due to them both filling you up at the same time. You have felt so full even when you have eaten food more than you can digest. This foreign feeling is not much painful but rather exciting you to know how does it feel when they start moving.

Them nodding to each other, starts moving. A burning sensation spread all over your body and slowly slowly shifting to tingling pleasures. Toes curling, fingers digging into the skin. Jaemin biting down your shoulders and Jeno nearly choking you with hands around your throat gently but not to make you uncomfortable.

They increase their pace with praises flowing like a waterfall from their lips to make you float at the top of this world. Your mouth hangs open and Jeno takes this chance to slide his thumb inside and press on your tongue. You invitingly suck his digit.

“Shit I can feel you, jeno.”

“Me too.” He reads your body and facial expressions before calling out to Jaemin, “I don’t think she will last enough. Do it fast.”

With some few more thrust, you come undone and rest yourself against the front of Jeno and Jaemin sliding his hands against your back. You whine due to overstimulation but soon they come and ride out their high.

Pulling out from you, you are totally exhausted and anytime, you would pass out. But still trying your best not to fall in slumber. Jaemin makes some space to lay you down properly in the middle of the bed and you hug his torso before he covers both of you with the blanket Jeno brings over to him.

Jaemin brushes away the hair from your face, gently turning your body so that all your tensed and constricted muscles feel at ease.

“My pretty baby,” he whispers and you smile in response. “Get some sleep. We will clean you and take care of everything.”

“What are we now?” You ask with hooded eyes and murmuring sound.

Jeno chuckles at you, finding your every action cute when you are sleepy. “Isn’t it obvious. You are ours now. You belong to us. only us. You can’t ignore us now.” He slides himself inside the blanket to your other side mimicking his brother’s pose. Both of their attention on the sleepy figure between them, admiring how you still manage to look the prettiest even in such a state of exhaustion.

“Keep it a secret from our parents.”

“We will see about that.”

“No but-“

“Shh,” Jaemin coos. “Get some rest.”

Will it be a secret forever? Can they really keep it a secret? What if everyone comes to know about you?

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Taglist: @mymoodwriting @justhere4kpop @vvshere @anyamaris @yeoobin @icchyi @jwnghyuns @piratequeen-queenofgames @dinonuguaegi @oreharuuu @eriny123 @jaehunnyy @jaeminnanaaa17 @stolasisyourparent @bockhyun @b-a-nshee-blog @kundann

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[misguidedasgardian]

Storm's End (5)

HOTD MASTERLIST

Pairing: Aemond Targaryen x Niece!Strong!Reader

Summary: your mother sends you to Storm’s End to rally Lord Borros Baratheon for your side, but your uncle arrived there before you

Warnings: Cursing, use of the word bastard, angst, heavy, canon level incest, thoughts about dying, fear of commiting s*icide, mentions of bedding, and more, dark fic, Aemond is unhinged, rape, non-con, minors engaging in sexual activities, face fucking, blood, violence, and other very dark things. Aemond is unhinged and Reader is broken

+18 MINORS DNI

Wordcount: 3.4 k

Notes: I think… Lucemond shippers are going to get a treat? jeje didn’t mean to, it just happened, never wrote anything like this 

I really wanted to end this in this chapter, but it grew monstrous, and yes, I will make two endings, they will be published together...

“You know? I had dreamed about this many times”, he said, his voice clear despite the stormy winds, “when I finally have you within reach, to slice up your face like you did me, all those years ago”

The winds blow his hair, his cape, and made him shiver, but he grabbed onto the pommel of the sword Daemon made him carry whenever he went out

“You are right”, he said, “Uncle, your trouble is with me, you anger, your hate, I owe you a debt”, he said shakily, the only thing on his mind was his sweet sister’s face. Aemond only smiled, a few feet away from him, “Let her go…”

Aemond chuckled darkly

“Well said bastard”

“Let my sister go, take me prisoner instead”, he said shakily, “its me you want”, he whined, he was shaking like a leaf, so much Aemond thought, amused, that he was going to soil his pants

But it was endearing

“I may have underestimate you nephew”, he said simply 

“I think you’d do the same thing…”

“Mmm”, now he was amused

“Take my eye, do what you have to do, slice my face, take both, take me whole to the Red Keep but… release my sister”, he said, with those big green eyes

“Why would I? she is certainly a more entertaining guest than you”, he muttered with sick smile

They had met in a small, lonely island on Blackwater bay, in a middle point between Dragonstone and King’s Landing 

“Like I said, it’s me who took your eye years ago, it’s because of me you are lacking an eye, it's because of me my mother asked you to be tortured, and is because of me your mother almost killed mine, I made everything worse, and is because of me you're hurting my sister…”

Aemond chuckled

“That’s not why I took her”, he whispered, Luke couldn’t hear him

“I am sorry Uncle, for what happened that night, and I know is easy to say it now, but I was sorry back then, and I am right now”

“That means little to me”, he said, fixing his composure, “what was your plan exactly?”, he asked, “you are in no position to make any demands, I could kill you, easily, what then?”

Lucerys stopped shaking, he straightened his posture, he let go of his sword

“I just wanted you to know uncle”

“That you are sorry?”, he mocked 

“Yes”

“I don’t give a shit about your apologies nephew, you are a bastard who tried to steal my brother’s birthright”

“I will not fight about this with you uncle”, he said, “release my sister and take me instead”

“Well, like I said, I’ve dreamt about this many times, and now that we are here, I don’t see why I should be bothered”, he said dismissively

If he killed Luke, you would just… die, even if you were still breathing, you would be dead in life

And that is not what he wanted

The winds blew even more stronger than before, whistling in the wind, a storm was coming

“Go home Lucerys”

“But… my sister”, he said, taking a step towards him

“I fuck your sister, every chance I get”, he said with a smirk, Luke began shaking again, “I have her locked up in your mother’s old chambers”, he moved uncomfortably

“Why her?”, he asked, “she had never done anything to you”

“She payed up your debt to me, you should be thankful”, he said simply, “you should spend every waking moment thanking her”

“I didn’t want her to”, he said, “I want to pay my debt, I want you to leave her alone!”, he demanded

“Too late for that, she is probably with my child in her belly”, Lucerys frowned

“It had only been a couple of weeks!”, he whined

“That is how it works”, he mocked

“Please!”, he was growing desperate, he was supposed to be relieved but he wasn’t.

He had made his peace, he had come here to die for his sister, only to bring her back to Dragonstone

He should have told Aemond to bring her along, to make sure she returns home 

“I have her”

“Take my eye!”, he said, grabbing a small dagger from his belt, he tried to take it himself, but his arm was shaking terribly, something primal, in the bottom of his being wouldn’t let him hurt himself

Aemond trotted towards him, and Lucerys didn't move 

Aemond grabbed his hand, that had the dagger, and with the other grabbed the back of his head, to prevent him from moving 

“I don’t want your eye”, he said. Lucerys felt chills when he saw his sapphire stone in its place, “because even with only one, I can see, I have your heart”, he said with a manic smile 

“Let her go”, he begged, “please”

“Being born second son is hard, you don’t know about this because you are in to inherit Driftmark”, he manipulated his nephews hand until the tip of the dagger was scratching his upper cheek, right under his eye, “I get nothing”, he growled, Lucerys whimpered, “But she… is the only thing I’ve ever wanted, that I’ve desired… so after all the shit that I have been through, I decided to take her”

“She doesn’t deserve it”, he said, “I do…”, he said, he looked into his uncle’s eye and calmed himself, he steadied his breaths and stopped shaking, preparation for the pain his uncle felt all those years ago, “do it, for her”, he said

It was true

Aemond had wished upon this day for many years

And now that it was here

He didn't know what to do

It didn't taste as good as he thought it would 

it was almost too easy

Lucerys was right there in his grasp 

“Like I said..”, he released him, pushing him away, Luke fell pitifully on the sand, “i don’t want your eye bastard, because I have your heart in the Red Keep”

Aemond didn't think the little bastard loved his sister as Targaryens do, as a man loves a woman, he knew he loved her like a real sister, and that made it better

Luke tried to stand up, but he placed his boot on his chest, keeping him pinned to the beach

“Go home and tell your mother I fuck your sister every night, I will keep her at court, pregnant with my bastards for everyone to see”, he said, “but she is well fed, and… healthy”, he relented, “not happy, but alive and well”

He looked at the dagger in his hand and dropped it by his feet

“Please, let her go”, he begged one more time, “she wants to go home…”

“I will see you on the battlefield, there I will not be so forgiving”, Aemond turned back and walked hastily towards Vaghar, who was watching it all with tired eyes

Lucerys watched as Aemond took to the skies without even giving him a scare, a second glance 

. . .

Aemond found you sitting on the bed hugging your legs to your chest, crying softly. 

In a rage, to hurt you, he had showed you the letter Lucerys had send, you had grabbed him, begged him, cried to him not to go, that his brother was sorry, that you were never going to beg him to be released again, that you were going to stay here willingly, that you were going to change your attitude, bend the knee to Aegon, you actually dropped to your knees and grabbed onto his legs 

He released himself from you and left the chambers with a sick smile on his face

You trashed your room, you cried and wailed until soldiers came inside and restrained you

A maester gave you milk of the poppy to calm you down, but nothing could ease your mind

Aemond was going to kill your brother

And there was nothing you could do about it

When he opened the door his eye landed precisely on you, and then he looked at the rest of the room, mainly destroyed, maids had taken the worst part of it, but still it was visibly depleted of your former belongings. 

You looked at him, frightened, crying, your face red.

“Did you murdered my baby brother?”, you asked, he shook his head

“No”, you took a long sigh of relief, “He went home”

“Why?”, you asked him, he didn’t even know how to answer that

“Why didn’t I kill my own flesh and blood?”, he asked, bitterly, “He begged me to take out his eye”, a single tear fell down your cheek

“Did you?”, you asked

“No”, he said simply, “he offered it to me in exchange of your release”

“And why didn't you?”, he took out his coat, and left it over the chair in front of the fire, he then lost his vest, and he continued to release himself from his clothes, to finally turn to you

You knew what he wanted, and you were exhausted, for being all day and good part of the night

“I don’t want to talk about this anymore, you know why”, he said, climbing onto the bed, completely naked, you believed it was the first time you saw him bare like this 

He took the sheets that shielded you, and he took out your nightdress, you let him

You’ve come to learn that if you fight it, it was worse

And you didn't want to hurt anymore

You laid back as you spread your legs for him, and closed your eyes, preparing yourself for the pain. But what you felt was warm hands caressing your thighs, one of them traveling up your body, caressing you softly

You didn't know why, but this frightened you more than his roughness

You felt like he was tricking you into thinking he was going to be nice, only to hurt you again

You whimpered in fear

“Shhh, relax”, he whispered, “is alright, relax”, he continued gently, caressing your skin, the skin he once grabbed roughly.

One of his fingers teased your entrance, he teased and teased until eventually you relaxed, his finger now coated with juices, only then he put another finger to work, easing you open.

Only when he felt squelching noises, he dimmed you ready, he caressed your thighs, coaxing them open for him 

He entered slowly, gently, foreign, you had never felt this tenderness, from him…. he held you against him, one hand on your side, the other traveled to your face

“Look at me”, he demanded, and you obeyed, looking up at him. His thumb caressed the apple of your cheek as he fucked you slowly

You couldn’t say you enjoyed it, because he was always so rough, you were still sore, but at least, it didn't hurt

You didn't know which one was worse 

He cummed inside you, like always, and then he didn't discard you, he laid there by your side, he grabbed you and accommodated you by his side. You fell asleep quickly, that night, for the first time since he had you, you didn't have any nightmares 

. . .

Lucerys had arrived back home to Dragonstone with his tears dried upon his cheeks, he had no more to cry

He was weak and small, but he was willing to make the ultimate sacrifice and not even that had been enough

He was intercepted by Daemon, that was furious 

“Where have you been?”, he barked, grabbing him by the arm, “we had been worried sick”

“I tried to get her back”, he said silently

“What?”, he growled

“I met with Aemond, to offer myself for her”

“You did what? Are you mad? this was reckless, what if he had killed you? Can you imagine what your mother would have suffered?”, he said, shaking him, like that way he could restore him to sanity

“He didn’t take the chance to blind me”, he said, “I told him I was giving myself away, in exchange for her, and he wouldn’t go for it”

“We have Otto”, he said with a pleased smile

“What?”, asked lucerys

“A ship from Corly’s fleet caught him, he was trying to cross the Narrow Sea to gain support from those triarchy cunts”, he said, “we have him”

“We can trade him”

“Damn right we can”, he said with a wide smile, “we have a gathering”. he said, “a summit, with the great houses, and those traitorous cunts, there, we will discuss your sister’s release for him”, it was an improvement that he was still alive, thought Luke 

. . .

“Let’s give them the little bastard and be done with it”, said Aegon

“No”, sentenced Aemond, “not her”

“Aemond, they have your grandfather”

“Let them keep him”

“Aemond!”, shrieked Alicent, “he is your grandfather”

“He is a cunt that whore you out to Viserys, manipulated you for years, made you believe Rhaenyra would kill us, only to place this whoremonger, drunk cunt on the throne”, he said, Alicent was so enraged she didn’t know what to say, “let them kill him”

Aegon laughed, approving of his brother’s words, Alicent just covered her mouth

“How could you say something like that? everything we have done has been to keep you all safe”

“We are in the most dangerous position”, he said simply, “he will throw us all into war, for his ambition, we could all die for it”, he said, “yes we could kill them also, but it is naive to think all of us will survive”, he said, “Rhaenyra has the numbers”

“We have dragons”

“They do too”, he said, “and an the most powerful armada of the seven Kingdoms”

“Aemond, you did it”, she said softly, “you… had her, dishonored her… showed to everyone what she is…it is done”

“I’ll decide when it's done”, he growled, Aegon slapped the table, wanting the attention

“I am the King!”, he said, “i’ll decide when it's done”

“She is with child”, Aemond said, Alicent paled

“Aemond”

“She is with my child in her belly”

“It's been less than a moon”, she said then, “you can’t be sure”

“I’m sure”

“I don’t care”, said Aegon, “she goes”, he said. Aemond raised from his seat enraged, “careful brother, or we might start thinking you care about her”, Aemond walked away from the room, enraged 

He found you reading, cuddling by the fire in the hearth of the room 

As you always did you trembled when you saw him, and he give you a satisfying smirk

“Your treacherous family has my grandfather”, he thought he was going to see relief in your eyes, but he only saw fear

“I’m sorry”

“You are going to be”, he said, taking off his vest and undoing his breeches, “get on your knees”

You stood up from your place, walked towards him and did as he said, kneeling in front of him, who had sat on the bed. 

Aemond released his hard cock

“Suck”, he was impatient, and angry, he didn't wait for you to make up your mind, he grabbed you by the back of the head, grabbing into your hair roughly, you whined, but he didn't care you opened your mouth and he stuck his cock in it, until you were choking and crying 

“Do you hate me yet?”, he teased, you shook your head, “auw, aren’t you sweet?”, he pushed until your nose touched the hairs on his groin, you whined, not being able to breathe. He grunted above you, you tried to look at him, and his eye were closed in pure pleasure. Droll fell from the corners of your lips, making your chin burn

It didn’t last long, still grabbing you by your hairs he pulled you up only to throw you to be the bed

“Lay back, spread your legs”, he commanded, and just like the night before, you obeyed him without fighting

He took his time to admire you, specially the brand he had drawn on your thigh, the A could be seen, clear as day, he caressed it with his thumb

“We have to take advantage, in a moon’s time we have a summit with the high lords, they are going to try and trade you for my grandfather”, he muttered 

He kneeled on the bed and he grabbed your hips, raising them and drawing you to him, and then he thrusted into you, making you whimper

“No need to prepare you this time”, he mocked, “I knew you were a wanton little whore”, a single tear fell from your eyes as he started pounding roughly into you

It was foreign, for him to cuddle you like he had been doing for the past nights

You didn’t even know how long it had been since he had you here, trapped in these chambers

“Do you hate me now?”, he insisted, you didn’t know why is was so important, the answer was the same

“I don’t hate you uncle”

“What do I need to do to you for you to hate me?”, he asked quietly

“Why would you want my hate?”, you asked, tired

Yes, why?

Perhaps to make himself feel better, perhaps if you all hated each other this would be much easier. Perhaps he was angry, because he had spend all these years hating the lot of you, and you didn't hate him back, he had barely been in your mind those years you were in Dragonstone 

He was desperate to coax some feeling into you

You had loved him, you had said so yourself

Had

You clearly didn’t love him now, so the next best thing he could do, was make you hate him

Because he had loved you to

Since he was a child and you a little girl, he loved you innocently, with a still pure heart. 

But then his mother and grandfather poisoned him, poisoned his mind, his heart, putting into his head that you were just a little bastards who was out for their inheritance, their birthrights, that you were a little whore even if you were a young girl, just like your mother, that you were there to manipulate, to whore yourself out to get what you wanted

So his sweet, innocent, healthy childish crush became a dark obsession, because he shouldn’t want you, he should hate you, and yet… He started desiring you with his whole being… It was wrong, he was a prince, a prince taught by the teaching of the New Gods, and you were a bastards born of filthy and impure desire

At that point you were already in Dragonstone, but Aemond never forgot about you

By the time he saw you again during Driftmark, he couldn’t hide it no longer, despite what he knew his mother was going to answer, because she was intended on making peace with Rhaenyra

But that cunt took you away from him, scared

How could you refuse him? him? a prince of the realm, a Targaryen Prince, not a bastard like his children

When he came to his senses, he felt a warm liquid on his chest, you were crying, and he was grabbing so hard into you he was bruising you

“I just want to know why you hate me and my brothers so much”, you whined

Deep down he knew it was wrong, he knew that you were not at fault…

But you flaunted it

You and your little bastard brothers flaunted your inheritance, your dragons, always laughing, forgetting practice, not taking it serious enough

And then that little bastard took his eye

After he rightfully claimed Vhagar

He took his eye and his own father wouldn't defend him against them.

He hated you because you were happy, and you had the love of the man who was supossed to love him the most

And he was wretched 

And yet he couldn’t answer, he didn't find it in himself to look until he found a clear answer

So he didn’t

You hugged him, hugged his torso, your face on his chest

“I don’t want you to hate us”, you whined

Perhaps they were just children, manipulated by their parents, their frustrations, anger and hate rubbed into them, passed onto them like a twisted disease 

“Why?”, he asked

“Because I’m scared of that hate”, you answered, “all that hate is going to get us all killed”, you whispered, “I don’t hate you uncle”, you said then

“Even though I killed your dragon?”

“I don’t hate you” 

“Even though I raped you bloody?”, he asked in an even tone, you shook your head, “and I called you a whore, and a bastard?”

“I don’t”

This cycle of hate had to end with you.

“You don’t want me dead?”, he asked

“No”, you whispered, “I just wish we could all be small again, and play together like we used to, we could have been good friends”, you said childishly

You had been so protected and guarded your entire life that you still held onto that childishness 

He chuckled

He had killed your dragon, drowned you, raped you, choked you, humiliated you, defiled you, and the only thing you wanted was for him not to hate you, to go back in time and start over, so you would all be friends

Oh you were so innocent 

So pure

“I don’t hate you Zaldrïtsos”, he said finally

He just enjoyed hurting you

He just enjoyed possessing you, it was much better, to take you by force... But he wanted you, you didn't want him back, but he had the power to take you by his own. It was exhilarating

But he didn't hate you

He wanted you so much that it hurt him

taglist

@lightdragonrayne @immyowndefender @aemondswifeisme @twobluejeans @toodlesxcuddles @sassysaxsolo @thearchitectoflove @maidmerrymint @floralsightings @daughterofthemoons-stuff @glendarollitkatharinesanders @ruhjkie @starkjedi @baconturtle @aleemendoza2425-blog @ahristata @dlwlrmas-world @yentroucnagol @hiraethrhapsody @alwaysholymilkshake @marihoneywk @belladonna00 @strangersunghoon @anehkael @t0uch-starved-h0e @hkmultifandom @letmehavemyfictionalmen @belcalis9503 @daddydaemonswife @daemontargaryenwhore @bash1018 @urmomsgirlfriend1 @ninastyless @strangersunghoon @bellstwd

[oleanderscorner]

Thick-skulled, thick-skinned.

Yan!Dr.Ratio x reader x Yan!Acheron

TW: Yandere content and all that comes with that (gore, violence, obsession, ect), biting, fighting and bickering between yans—viewer discretion is advised.

So these two seem like unlikely pairs right? But honestly I think they have the same time—the emotionally intelligent type!

Veritas gets to you first actually—he clocks you as a member of The Express and becomes intrigued as you’re calming down PomPom. It’s something that just barely catches his attention—honestly it would be but a footnote in his thousands of thoughts if it wasn’t for seeing you do so again with other people around this place…

All whilst making a fool of yourself.

See you may not know what you’re talking about in calming down say…a student of his from a bad exam grade that they aren’t used to—it’s clear from your approach that you don’t know the material but somehow you’re able to calm them down anyway so they can see where they went wrong themselves—at least partially so…

That’s when he realizes he has been watching your approach to people and finds it utterly fascinating and yet idiotic how you are.

Just as he does—you’re off to Penacony!

That’s where Acheron catches you…

See Acheron does not know how to open up their heart ever or again…and yet, in the same breath she cannot help but stare at your visage as if the warmth and gentle feel you have radiates off of you.

When she first catches why such a thing can come from your very image, she sees you navigating a conversation with a very upset looking girl—eventually leading to her calming down for a moment and becoming excited over something—likely a new toy or some sort of treat.

She can’t comprehend both how and why you did that—so she watches over you, then it becomes justifying continuing watching over you even when you think you’re alone or not interacting with others—after all she has to keep you safe and in case you do gain an interaction, and then she just never wants you to leave her sight just in case danger happens when she just isn’t there so she continues watching…until not even she realizes she is obsessed.

Too bad Ratio is just on her tail

—

You were making coffee in the little room you had confined yourself in for the day—of course you loved going out and enjoying the day within Golden Hour…but you needed a mental health day—your energy was getting the best of you.

See—it was getting harder to rest when it wasn’t entering this dream. Always feeling like eyes were upon you…even as you kept your eyes glued shut you just couldn’t seem to really sleep for very long. Sure you got an hour or two as finally your eyes being shut for so long forced your brain to let you sleep but it was hardly enough…

Perhaps that was simply what it was like here—honestly you were just surprised that you needed sleep in the first place with being in a dream most of your days. But at least the confines or a room in here were far better than that other room where your body decided to rest.

You had just taken a sip of this dreamy coffee when it felt like a jolt of your mind and soul had brought you out of water—and not just a pool either, like you were dragged from an ocean in but a split second.

You expected to see March or Himeko—maybe Welt even…but golden eyes stared back at you—you recognized this man, Dr.Ratio. He had once been but a figure of intimidation in your life as it seemed he found you as nothing more than a nuisance and perhaps even less—but slowly as he saw you more as a person and not as just a being in the situation, circumstance, and general vicinity he was in he had become somewhat your friend. He clearly needed someone to talk and rang to himself and you provided that—always such a good friend to help…even if sometimes he called you an idiot or an imbecile. He seemed hard-pressed about something and held your arm tight in his hand.

You would freak out, but your immediate reaction to do so had long been suppressed as you quickly assessed the situation. Something was wrong, and he was going to explain it whether or not you asked—so it was better to start making things calm now by getting the situation in order.

“Is anyone hurt? Is everything alright?”

His brow was furrowed as he made a “tsk” sound and quickly pulled you up as he walked you down the hall to explain. You were always too good at keeping calm even when someone was taking your body and dragging it off like it was nothing more than a pebble on a string.

“You haven’t been getting my messages, so I went to check up on you only to see a woman with a weapon exit your room before I could get down the hall. So, obviously for your safety, I’m seeing to it you are located elsewhere until the threat is found and neutralized.”

Panick set in as you listened to his words—he was straight forward and left no room for you to argue. But even still you tried.

“What about the others—“

A quick cut off like chalk hitting a blackboard—he was prepared for this question.

“They are being informed by others, worry not. I wouldn’t be so idiotic to leave them behind.”

You believed him as he continued to drag you out of the vicinity. All seemed well for a moment until a shade of purple whip close to you and you felt the driving force of someone else tug you back out of the man’s grip—the edge of a sword just barely in your view as most of your vision was blocked by a hand.

A familiar and yet unknown voice rang in your ear in an instant as arms held you tight…and yet so gently, like the chains of slumber as you barely wake up on a soft pillowy bed.

“What do you think you’re doing?”

—

Actually living with the two of them is quite a challenge.

After their initial fight, which you were carefully taken care of to be unconscious for, they came to an agreement to share you. So, they both had to move themselves and you to a secure living location.

You being so emotionally intelligent can be damaging as both can easily be turned against the other in this situation, so, to keep that from happening they have to convene once a week on what you told them, even if it was meant to be a secret.

Acheron is with you most of the day, honestly she’s silent but she will teach you self defense if you beg nicely enough. She will accompany you to perform daily tasks and be the one you confide in the most just as she latches to you for her own sanity. She’s far easier to talk to and handle as she will be less willing to tell Ratio everything so long as it doesn’t pose a danger to you or herself—and so long as you don’t ask to leave.

If you do she’s willing to let things slip to teach you a lesson.

However she could never herself physically harm you…

Until it’s late at night, when she’s holding your back to her chest and she’s having night terrors again. She needs something to remind her you’re there and you won’t leave her…

So she bites—hard enough to leave a mark for the morning and to leave a mark to trace her fingers over as a reminder that you’re there.

Just hopefully you don’t wake up screaming and wake Veritas.

Other than that she helps however she can—really, she’s a good cook so she tries to prepare dinner so Veritas isn’t the only one cooking and lunch is always prepared by her—although she does appreciate it if you do make a snack for the two of you to share during the day.

She also does most of the cleaning as she makes sure to guard and watch over you while doing so, really, she can’t have you being hurt by something accidentally breaking or getting sick from the abundance of cleaning chemicals to keep the place spotless, while surely making your bed and such is fine—why lift a finger when she can do it and make sure you aren’t hurt?

She will also take the really hard tests with you—just to make sure you don’t get a headache from everything…

Because goodness knows what would happen if you got hurt even a little…

Veritas on the other hand spends the most time with you in the morning and afternoon. Once he gets up you’re to get up with him and perform a light brain exercise of a standard Calculus I test while you have a nutritionally well-balanced breakfast that he has prepared. In fact, aside from lunch he prepares every meal—even if he doesn’t cook it himself.

He makes sure you read at least 2 books a day and write a summary on each and answer a series of vague questions that allow you to pick the books you read while also making sure you’re using your brain—after all, you can’t be stupid intellectually. He grades these in the afternoons over dinner, which has you doing some light Chemistry or Biology work.

Veritas may not be so easily softened, however he is desperate in his own way as he clings. He rambles on topics and if you get something wrong and come to him and let him explain it, even if he ends up calling you some amount of names you can see the glimmer in his eyes as he gets to talk about the subject. Although if you get too many wrong sometimes there is just a slight bit of extra annoyance.

He starts nearly every bickering fight with Archeron—especially if he doesn’t like her methods. Of course you should be cleaning those chemicals are safe—he can make an assignment about it and you should know how to work an oven and a stove without burning yourself, if not then that’s on you and not them.

He knows Acheron does the biting thing—and everytime he wakes up to it he dresses your wound and once you’re asleep he’ll bicker with her day and night over it. He doesn’t see it as good or ideal…but in the end he knows the arrangement is best. Afterall, he only was able to keep a stalemate due to his statues—and Archeron is a good guard when he’s away.

While they bicker often—it’s really not all that bad.

The times (other than some meals) you all do get together is bath time. You all take a bath together as Veritas insists on it—and honestly them taking care of you during this time of cleaning is just so relaxing…it’s probably the best time of the day. You let them ramble and rant while doing so as you whisper and encourage them and talk with them through the vents and tribulations of their day and such.

Although you’re starting to suspect they may also like eachother in this arrangement…and part of you is worried that if they work together more than this arrangement, they’ll be less inclined to consider your decisions on things when you already get so little…

Afterall darling, what’s two against one?

AN: A little OOC but I hope you all enjoyed!!! Truly an idea I’ve had for a bit now that I just needed to get into text. Lmk any requests!!

[ifonlyyuweremine]

Tough Love

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Smut with a plot nobody asked for.

Overview || Older man König being a dick but we’re trynna get that dick.

(Warnings) Smut, Age gap, soft sex, degradation?, poorly written, praise, size diff, bad grammar, daddy issues if you squint, crying, p in v, power imbalance, mirrors, desperation, covenant plot, semi-public sex, fingering, oral.

I don't know how many words it's just long. 18+

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Being in the military wasn’t easy; nobody had ever said it was. Long, grueling work hours, fixing trucks and tanks you didn’t even know how to operate.

Sleepless nights that left you catching sleep anywhere you could. Training that left your body sore and numb. Yet one man made your life in the force more complicated than necessary. Your Colonel was a man who haunted both your dreams and your hours in the daylight. Putting you through training that exceeded your limits.

He was pushing you to the brim of what you could achieve as a human. He was like a moth drawn to a flame, eyes trained on you. Always you. His rank kept an iron grip on your tongue; never had you wanted to curse out an officer like you did him. He was constantly muttering something in German around you, his voice a low-pitched grunt.

Not only was his training enough to make anyone shiver, but his size alone provoked a kind of unease. The closest thing to a superhuman that you’d ever seen; the fear of him keeping your lips sealed, making you swallow your words and follow his orders like a dog. After all, what was a couple more laps, sets, or chores compared to the punishments he could put you through?

Yet at the same time he ignited a fire inside you, one that bellowed deep within your stomach. Twisting and turning your organs with each step he took. As much as you despised him your subconscious mind had other ideas, ideas buried inside dreams, haunting your nights with his touch.

Rough calloused hands grazing on your skin, wedging between your legs. Breathy groans of relief flooding the shell of your ear. And god, his eyes. His eyes; oh how they would look at you, clouded over like perspiration on a window. Eyebrows knit together in pleasure, your hands cupping his face; tactile touch along his stubble and jaw.

You couldn’t stand it, waking up from those fantasia. Legs tangled inside the sheets of your bed, your chest heaving, and a burning feeling spread across your cheeks and down to your thighs.

Only for you to be torn apart from those fantasies of your Colonel into the harsh realities of daylight. However like all things, this was temporary was it not? A silly little fantasy blooming from your own masochism. It was bound to end.

Right?

————————————————————————

The gym was a good place to blow off steam, and so was the punching bag. A large sack of metal wrapped up in fabric just for your temper. Or lack thereof, holding everything in until it bubbles to the surface only to be released in quick bursts of energy.

Even if it was public and people could see you in all your glory, sweaty, gassed, and irritable. It didn't hinder your fists, rhythmically contacting with the rough, bright red fabric of the bag. Today was a better day; hardly anyone was there. They were keeping to themselves and then wandering back to their barrack. You stayed put. Immersing yourself in the numbness of your spent body.

It had been a collective of instances that had put you here. Firstly a rough start to th morning when you had split the mediocre breakfast onto yourself. Secondly after you had cleaned up there wasn’t much time left before drill runs so you opted out of eating. Big mistake.

People always say breakfast is the most important meal of the day; however, they say it because they mean it. You were irritable and tired, an incessant growling and podding of your stomach for everyone to hear. Your dill instructor also just so happened to be Colonel König. It was almost comical like the universe played an elaborate joke on you. And König being well, König made sure not to go easy on the drills. For being in the military and a colonel at that, he never yelled. He didn't need to, though; his normal voice was enough to command and make your blood run cold.

He eyed you down every step of the way through your drills. His cold blue eyes drilled into your own, and when that was all you could see of his face, make no mistake that those eyes didn't leave you even when he looked away.

You saw those eyes everywhere. His gaze clung to your psyche like sap from a tree. However, they were never as soft in the waking world. You preferred looking at him in your dreams; a spark of life that you couldn't see now when you looked at him.

After exhausting yourself with drills he pulled you aside, crossing his arms and looking down at you. His presence no less menacing than the day before.

“You are cutting back on training.”

It was direct, and straight to the point. Not like you expected anything else. You bit your tongue, “I've been present for each drill Colonel.” You replied plainly, keeping your voice flat.

“Then why are you struggling? Kleines mädchen (little girl), if you are keeping up with your other drill sergeants, you should be able to keep up with me, no?”

His accent rang in your ears, thick inflections rolling off his raspy voice. You swallowed, looking up at him, craning your neck to meet his icy gaze. “I don't know, Colonel, I'm trying, Sir. Believe me, I am.” You breathe, holding back a slew of profanities and excuses you knew he wouldn't accept behind your tongue.

He chuckled, cold and dry like his words. Eyes narrowing in on you, “You don't know?” he clicked his tongue, each one echoing through your eardrum.

“Das ist nicht gut (that is no good), [name] I train soldiers. Not fragile little mice. I know you are a capable young woman. So next time you come here, you train like a soldier. Is that acceptable, maus (mouse)?”

His words made your blood boil, and pursing your lips together you nodded. You nodded like a good soldier, “Yes Colonel.”

His eyes crinkled a little, not as if he was smiling but as if he was smirking. “Good. You're dismissed.” He murmured. You couldn't help how your eye twitched and your jaw clenched. Something that the giant man didn't miss.

You winced, repeatedly striking a metal bag for hours did end up coming back to bite you in the ass. Stepping back for a breath, the sound of your heavy breathing was the only sound you could hear besides the incessant ringing in your head. Running a hand through your hair, your scalp sweaty. Your whole body felt like it was on fire, you never understood how easily König got under your skin. His words cut deep, and it ignited something. A need to please.

You wanted him to like you, you wanted his snide comments and belittling remarks to stop. You wanted his praise, his pride, his approval. And you hated that you wanted it.

Everyone else seemed to like you, so why couldn't he? Why couldn't he see you were trying? How hard you had worked?

You punched the bag again and again. You grunted each time your fist hit the fabric. Wishing it was him, his body, his face, his eyes. You couldn't hear and couldn't think, wanting to dull your senses until you were dumbed down enough that you forgot what you were angry about.

“Enjoying yourself?”

You jumped a little, stumbling forward and looking over your shoulder. The hairs on the back of your stood up. You knew the voice, the rasp, the accent. Königs large figure met your eye, looming behind you like a statue. You panted.

“What?” You looked at him quizically, your body frozen like a deer in headlights.

He chuckled, walking closer to you. “You can punch that bag with such rigor yet you fall short during my drills.”

You breathed, an airy silence filled the open room. You could feel your heart beating, a soft thumping that filled the silence of the now empty gym. König didn’t wait for you to respond.

“Your stance is off; you’ll hurt your back and hands if you punch like that dummes mädchen (silly girl).” He hummed casually.

You blinked; it was this again. Your eyes narrowed up at him, your posture straightening. “Thanks, Colonel, but I don't want your input.” You breathe, feeling a sudden tension strike between you and the large man in front of you.

König shrugged, his gaze never leaving your eye. His stare was almost cockly, arrogant. Like he knew he made your skin crawl. If only he knew how much he made your skin crawl. “I was not inputting on your stance, I'm telling you that it's bad. And that you're going to fix it.” He said calmly.

You tensed a little. Was this man serious? You didn't know if one man could have a more significant power trip than he did. You bit your tongue, something you felt you did frequently when he was around you.

“Turn around.”

You obeyed. The quicker you get this over with, the better. Or maybe someone would walk into the gym to take König away. You could only hope as you turned around to face the punching bag, raising your arms to a stance.

The hairs on your neck stood as you felt a warm body press against your back. You felt it, his warmth, his breathing, his gear; it ignited something. That familiar low buzz from your lower body. Like vibrating a strange frequency between comfortability and unease. A large hand rested on the small of your back, pushing lightly, making your stomach turn.

“You're hunched over too much. No wonder you struggle with posture.” He chuckled, low and throaty. You felt the vibrations of his voice against the shell of your ear.

You swallowed, suddenly feeling your throat get dry. The jab at you didn't mean anything anymore with how you felt his large fingertips pressing against your spine. You involuntary arched your back a little, something that he didn't miss.

“Sensibles kleines ding, nicht wahr (sensitive little thing, aren't we)?”

König murmured; it was in German. You only ever caught bits and pieces of his speech. His other hand ghosted over your elbow, raising it. “You also need to raise your arms; it's no good fighting if someone can strike your head.”

You were slowly becoming hyperaware of everything around you. The sound of Königs breathing, his gear pressed against your neck, his hand on the small of your back. You memorized every detail of his touch; for such a large and dickish brute that he was, his touch was gentle.

“I know you despise me maus (mouse), but I am only ever looking out for your best interest.”

You faulted. He knew? You figured that lying wasn't going to do you good because you did despise him. You hated him. And yet you responded to his touch, even more so you leaned into it. You craved it so much that you dreamed of it. “What gave me away huh?” You breathed.

A low rumble came from his throat again. Raising your other arm, “You are… not very good at hiding emotions, ja (yes)? You tense your jaw and fists when you speak to me; I have noticed you bite your tongue a fair bit around me as well.”

Well, he got you there, but König continued. “Out of everyone here, though, you are the hardest to figure out. Even as you wear your emotions on your sleeve.”

You narrowed your eyes in confusion, letting his large hand guide your movements like a doll. “I don't know what you mean,” you asked.

His hand started to ghost down your arm and over to your jaw. König grabbed your face between his thumb and fingers, his large hand gripping your cheek effectively shutting you up. And you let him.

“You seem to hate me more than anyone, yet I can always feel your eyes on me. And the fact is if you hated me as you do, you wouldn't try so hard to improve; you wouldn't seek my approval.” He murmured.

Your stomach twisted into knots, and he held you like putty. Melting in his hands, “So tell me [name], do you want my approval?”

The buzzing continued; it rang in your ears, and it sent waves through your core. Your eyes were wide, and you could feel your heart pumping in your chest. You were like a deer in headlights; Königs grip on your jaw loosened to help you speak. Everything was quiet. The only sound was your heart racking through your ribs.

König was getting impatient with the silence, his other hand grabbing your hip and squeezing.

“Tell me the truth mädchen (girl).”

You nodded slowly. It was as if you were processing your answer as you nodded. Inhaling shakily, “I do.” you murmured.

“You do what [name]?” He corrected, forcing your head up.

“I want your approval.”

There it was, that obedience that he loved oh so much. If you were good at anything, it was following orders. His upper lip curved up. He laughed softly, squeezing your face In his hands. “See? Was that so hard, maus (mouse)?”

You didn't respond, feeling a twinge of shame. Your body was recoiling in on itself. Your lips formed a soft frown, and your eyes faltered as they were forced to meet him.

He caught this and shook his head, clicking his tongue, “No, no, none of that Schatz (Darling), you said you wanted my approval no?”

You nodded, swallowing your pride. “Gut (good), you listen, and you get my praise. So, can you listen liebling (love)?”

You nodded again, feeling a warmth pooling in your stomach, your cheeks reddening. König tightened his grip on your cheek, “Say it.”

“I'll listen, promise.” You manage out.

He smirked, Königs large hand trailing to the front of your abdomen. “Braves mädchen (good girl), I have no doubt you'll be a good listener. You're already an exceptional soldier, aren't you? While stubborn, yes, but you're an obedient little thing.”

Your stomach tightened, his words filling your ear like music. His hand felt warm as it ran along your shirt. He gripped your body and forcefully moved you to the side so the both of you faced the large mirror wall. Your cheeks flushed at seeing yourself in such a state, as well as seeing Konig's large form pressed against your back, staring at you through the mirror.

“Do you know why I am hard on you [name]?”

You thought for a moment, coming up empty-handed with an answer. “No, I don't know.” You breathe. His hand snaking to your belt.

König leaned down a little, his mouth beside the shell of your ear. You could feel his breath against you, and it drove you mad. “I want what's best for you, maus (mouse), but you rely on others too much. So, someone needed to toughen you up, no? It's just tough love engel (angle).”

Your breath hitched as his hand undid your belt. Königs other hand was still holding your face; it was as if time was moving slower. You watched his movements from the mirror's reflection, the way his eyes stared directly at you through the glass. His eyes weren't like in your dreams, but they didn't look like how they usually did either.

They were darker and more concentrated. Königs pupils dilated, and his irises a greyer hue.

“König, there could be someone around Sir-” You were hushed by the feeling of his fingers sliding over your pelvis, trailing against the fabric of your underwear.

He hummed and looked at you through the mirror, “There is no one. Trust me, engel (angel), just stay put and look pretty for me.” König murmured, his lips against your temple covered by his sniper hood. His middle and ring fingers start to move in slow, sultry circles around your covered bud.

You inhaled; it was shaky. Your stomach jumped as his fingers sent feverish currents of electricity through your body. Your thighs tense, and you blushed, trying to look anywhere but in front of you, knowing you would be greeted by the lewd sight of Königs fingers dancing around your panties. Your hand grabbed his arm for support, and he chuckled grabbing your face harder and forcing your jaw and eyes back to the mirror.

“Don't look away. You look away, and I stop,” He rasped. You looked at yourself, practically put on display for your higher officer. Hips jittering forward as the pad of his fingers brushed and circled over your clit.

König smiled and let go of your face, the same hand trailing down to your chest. He grasped your breast, his larger hand squeezing and prodding at it like a stress ball.

“So verdammt hübsch (so fucking pretty),” König put more pressure on his fingers, digging into your bud. Smiling as you whined quietly, “Look at you, so eager. You hate me, but you can't resist letting me play with this perfect cunt of yours.”

You hated that it was true; you hated him, but God did his fingers feel good. A slick spot started to develop around your panties, accompanied by your red face and heavy breathing. You were getting worked up by barely anything, yet it was better than anything you'd ever experienced. And König seemed to pick up on this rather quickly.

He raised an eyebrow and smirked, “Tell me, engel (Angel), tell me, have you ever let a man do this to you?”

You swallowed, watching through the mirror as his fingers slid up and down the fabric of your soaked panties. You shook your head, “No… I've fooled around with other guys, but nobody has ever done…” You trailed off, breath hitching again as his other hand pinches your nipple through the fabric of your clothes.

König hummed, “I figured so; you fool around with little boys liebste (sweetheart), not men. None of them know their way around. They don't know how to please you, do they?”

You whimper as he slips a finger down your panties, the pad of his middle finger coming in contact with your needy clit. Circling it, gathering your arousal with his strokes. You shake your head, looking at yourself. “No- they don't,” you choke out.

You looked like a skank in your mind, submitting so quickly to him—his hand down your underwear and one on your breast.

He smiled, “Good thing I'm not a little boy.”

Suddenly, he slipped one of his fingers into your eager little cunt. You choke out a surprised moan, your voice echoing off the walls of the empty gym. His finger was enormous; it almost hurt. And you shivered at the thought that just one of his fingers stretched you out.

“Scheiße (fuck), such a tight pussy.” He laughed lowly as he lazily drew his finger out and pushed it back in. He drank in how your gummy walls clenched and twitched around him. “M’gonna have to stretch you out.” He chuckled.

You grappled at his arm as he pumped his finger in and out. You squeezed your eyes shut and let out sweet whines and moans. König promptly withdrew his finger and flicked at your bud, causing a sharp pang of both pain and pleasure that shot your eyes open.

“Hey, what did I say? Eyes open while I work this pretty cunt open.” He ordered, and you whined. Your eyes pool with soft tears from the shock.

You nodded, and he slipped his finger back in, gently working in his ring finger. You squeaked, panting as you watched his fingers through the fabric of your panties. “König, s’too big-” you whined.

He shushed you and pressed a masked kiss to your temple, letting his second finger slide entirely in, scissoring you open. “Shh, it's not too big; trust me, engel (Angel), you're just not used to it yet.” He hushed, pumping his two fingers in at a steady pace.

You felt your thighs shaking a little, watching your reflection as he worked you open. König murmured words of praise into your ear as he did so.

“That's it [name], braves mädchen (good girl). Take it; take my fingers. Let me stretch this perfect cunt out.”

You let out a moan, feeling a burning pleasure building in your core. Your hips began to stutter, bucking into his hands. You covered your mouth with your hand, trying to muffle your moans and cries of pleasure.

König quickly took your hand away from your mouth, “No, no, don't you dare do that. Let me hear you, engel (Angel), let me hear those pretty fucking moans.”

You felt yourself coming undone, your thighs clamping down. A tightness was blooming in your stomach; you could barely hold yourself up as it was. Almost impaling yourself on Königs fingers.

“König, fuck- I can't, m’gonna cum.” You whimpered, your body tensing up.

At that, he forced his fingers deeper, finding that pillowy spot inside you as he curled his fingers, finding your g-spot. “Go ahead, schatz (darling), come for me. Look at me in that mirror; look at who's making you cum.”

You felt light for a moment, and König watched in satisfaction as your mouth formed that ‘o shape he loved so much.

Your legs quivered as it hit you, crashing down on you like a wave. It was too much, the pads of his fingers digging into your G-spot, his large fingers stretching your cunt out oh so nicely. You screamed, the noise bouncing off the walls. Your head thrown back into Königs chest.

That was the first time a man had made you come on his fingers alone.

You came back down into reality after a couple of long seconds. Almost falling due to your limp legs, luckily König held you up. Withdrawing his fingers from your spent cunt and holding your hips. He chuckled and pressed a kiss through his hood to your ear, neck, and temple.

“So good, took it so well, didn't you?” He whispered you looked messy. Your clothes are messy, and your eyes are glazed with the remanence of that hazy pleasure. Your own slick was dripping down your thighs. 

You teetered in his hands like jello. König looked down at you, “You're almost ready, I would say.”

Looking up at him confused, your eyes furrowed and eyebrows knit together. “Almost?” You repeated. Almost slurring your words.

He nodded, grabbing you by your hips and hoisting you up. Turning you around and walking towards the mirrored wall. “Yes, did you think you'd be ready after just my fingers?” He mused, lifting you so your legs were wrapped around his torso.

You blushed, feeling a little dense. “Well… yes?” You said feeling your back hit the wall.

König let out a throaty laugh, “Engel (Angel), I appreciate your eagerness, but I'm a large man, no? And your cunt could barely take my fingers; what makes you think you could take my cock?”

You looked away sheepishly, “Don't worry, this will feel good too. I'm not withholding anything from you that you need.” König hummed.

He slid off your pants and your dirty underwear, leaving your bottom half barren. Holding you by your thighs and your back pressed against the mirror, he looked at you. “Take off the top, and the bra too.”

You obeyed, sliding off your remaining clothing. After you were barren of your garments, he took you in. “Gott schau dich an (God look at you), the prettiest body I've ever seen” König breathed.

You felt your cheeks burning at his praise, this was wrong. You would be in deep if the both of you got caught, yet that look in his eyes made you crave more of him. Something real, he was real and he was in front of you.

“Promise to hold on ja (yes)? I won’t drop you.” He breathed, you looked at him in confusion.

“Hold on?”

Before you could do anything he hoisted you up again, throwing your thighs over his shoulder. The mirror behind you pressed against your back. You yelped, caught off guard.

You were high up, almost like a game of chicken. Your face burned as you saw your core inches away from his hood. König held you behind and your thighs, keeping you in place. “König, what are you doing?” you squeaked.

He looked up at you, his eyes crinkling. “I thought it was pretty obvious, no? I want my fill, too. Why not make this a pleasurable experience for the both of us?” He hummed, reaching up to his hood and lifting it past his nose.

His lips curved into a smile, a small scar carved into his upper lip. Königs jaw was sharp, peeks of stubble over his chin and jaw, some of it greying at the edges.

The stubble on his face pressed into your thighs, making it tickle. Your breath hitched, and you felt your stomach do a small flip; you could feel his breath on your core, and it made you shiver.

“Scheiße (fuck), can't wait to taste this perfect cunt.”

Before you could protest, he buried his face into your core. König licked a strip down your slit. Making you mewl, your thighs clenching around his head.

Due to your previous activity, you were already soaked. Königs mouth was covered in your arousal; he hummed as he pushed his tongue inside your swollen folds. The vibrations of his voice sent shockwaves through your spine.

You moaned, and your hands shot to his hood, grasping at the material on the top of his head. “Oh, oh fuck,” you whined, throwing your head back into the wall.

It felt too good. The feel of Königs mouth was like heaven; he moaned into your pussy while his fingers dug into the meat of your thighs and behind. He drew up for air before focusing his attention on your needy clit.

Your back arched in surprise, and you gasped out a lewd moan. Your fingers dug into the fabric of his hood as he sucked and pressed open-mouth kisses to your bud of nerves. It was a lot.

Hot tears pooled into the corners of your eyes from overstimulation. Your thighs clasping as his head, you tried to push his head away from your clit, but he was relentless.

König looked at you the entire time, watching eagerly to see each twitch, moan, and tear.

After another minute, he detached from your cunt. His breathing labored, and his chin covered in your slick. He groaned and pressed a kiss to your spent clit. “You taste so good, engel (angel), sweetest pussy I've had.”

You caught your breath, letting out a soft whimper, “don't stop, please.” you whine.

König raised an eyebrow and laughed, “So bedürftig (so needy).” He readjusted himself, making you bounce on his shoulder. He spit on your cunt and plunged his lips back into you. Moaning as his tongue slipped in and out of your clenching hole.

You yelped and whimpered, rolling your hips into his face. As you did, he tightened his hold on your thighs, “Mhfp- yes, just like that liebe (love), roll those pretty hips.” He groaned against your soaked folds.

You could feel that familiar coil tighten in your stomach. Staring to blabber and whine, your thighs fighting around his head.

As soon as König felt that you were on the brink of cumming he pulled his mouth away. You whimpered at the loss, bucking your hips needily at the loss of his touch. Looking down at him with a fucked out expression, eyebrows knit together in confusion. “Why’d you stop?” you whine.

König licked his lips, looking up at you. “Es tut mir leid Liebe (I’m sorry, love), but I can't wait.” He breathed with a grin.

Quickly, he grabbed your thighs and hoisted you down until you were even with him. He was holding your butt with one hand and unbuckling his belt with the other.

You didn't have the heart to complain at the loss of his mouth when you knew his cock was waiting.

König managed to unzip his pants and then pull down his boxers, taking his length into his hand. You swallowed.

It was big; he wasn't kidding when he said you needed that prep. Your eyes were locked on his hard cock pulsing in his hand. It had to be at least seven inches, maybe eight. The reddened mushroom tip was sticky with his precum. Your eyes trailed down, watching the vein that ran down to the base of his pelvis and his heavy balls.

König chuckled as he watched your eyes, completely enamored with his dick. König stroked himself a few times so he could fully harden, making you blush just watching it.

He smiled and kissed your temple softly, “Don't get shy on me now, engel (angel).” He rasped.

“That thing will not fit; it will split me open.” You breathed, and he laughed at that. “I'll make it fit.”

You looked at him, your eyes a mix of unease and need—a paradoxical combination that left even you confused about what you wanted. But the way he left your cunt wanting, you didn't think you could leave without it.

“Promise to go slow, okay?” you asked him. König nodded. “Promise hübsches mädchen (pretty girl).” He whispered back to you; he then slowly dragged his hard cock along your puffy cunt. Making you squirm as the tip collected your slick.

König then pushed the fat tip into you; immediately, you whined, and your hands dug into his shoulder. Your back pressed against the mirror, and your thighs tightened around his abdomen.

He slowly pushed his hips into you inch by inch. It was a mix between pain and pleasure, feeling a tightness in your cunt as König stretched out your gummy walls.

He looked up at you once you were halfway, “Gut fühlen (feeling good)? Can I keep going?”

You nodded and breathed out, “Yeah, keep going.” You whimpered.

Fuck, it all felt so good, his hands slotted at your back and thighs. His cock pushing into you at an agonizing pace. König hisses as he plunges himself fully into you, his hips pressed against yours. “Mein Gott (my god), that's it.” He groaned.

“Oh mein Gott, verdammt (oh my god, fuck), tightest pussy I've had.” König breathes, his hands squeezing the flesh of your hip and thigh. You felt full; his fleshy tip prodded against your sweet spot. This was different than his fingers or his mouth. This felt addictive, the way your cunt pulled him in, the way you melded into him like you were made for his cock.

You felt your head fall back against the mirror, sucking in breaths and moans each time he pulsed inside your cunt. “König, need you to move.” you gasped.

He nodded, lifting your hips and then dropping them down while bucking up into you at the same time, using you like a human fleshlight. You screamed.

He immediately set a pace, not slow, but not fast either. It was like he was testing the waters on how much you could take. And god, did you want everything. You wanted it more than air.

His cock slipped in and out of your pulsating cunt, a squelching noise sucking him back in every time he forced himself back in. The both of you were a mess, grunting and gasping for air. König slotted his face inside the crook of your neck so he could whisper his profanities into your ear while he speared you with his cock.

“Dir gefällt das, nicht wahr (you like this, don't you)? Come on, hübsches Mädchen (pretty girl). Tell me how much you love this dick.”

His hips rammed up into you, the tip of him pushing up into your cunt, making you yelp. You were barely processing what he said, “Feels so good, fuck you feel so good König.” You cry out.

This spurred him on further, his hands forcing you down at a much more brutal pace. König was splitting you open, and you couldn't be more willing to take it. You took it so well, wet cunt fluttering around him.

The sounds the both of you made echoed across the gym's walls. The grunts and moans, the wet slapping of his balls against your body, and the lewd noises of you soaking his dick in your own arousal.

The mirror that you were pressed up against was fogged in the shape of your ass and back. Yet you didn't care; all you could think about was the giant of a man desperately plunging his needy cock into your swollen pussy.

“God, do you know how long I've wanted to do this? Huh? To fuck you on my cock? Every damn time I looked at you, I wanted you.” He hissed, bucking his hips up into you.

You felt dizzy; you couldn't process his words. You were too fucked out. He noticed this and chucked, followed by a moan—his breath melding against the curve of your neck. “Dummes Mädchen (dumb girl), can't even think now, can you? Too drunk off this dick.” He grunted.

Your hands held his shoulders, nails digging into his clothes. “Making a mess of my fucking pants.” he breathed.

There it was again. You felt the familiar coil within your body. You were close, “König- gonna cum. Can't hold it,” you cried out. Your thighs were clenching around his abdomen. He nodded, “I know, scheiße (fuck), I know. Come on, do it for me; come on this cock.”

You screamed his name, a tidal wave of electricity running through your body. Your cunt fluttered around him, gushing perfectly around his cock. It was like you saw white, your eyes rolling back as he pounded through your orgasm. Your toes curling and your legs straightening out.

König moaned as you creamed around his dick. He felt it, too. His digits dug into your skin, “Engel (Angel), tell me where. Fuck tell me where you want it.” he gasped.

You almost didn't respond, almost in another world entirely, as his hips pounded into your spent cunt. You felt a thousand things at once, “I-Inside, I'm clean.” you choked out.

At that, he came, his hips stuttering, letting out a long breathy moan. He coated your pussy white, a warmth spreading through your hole. He lazily thrust a few more times before just staying put. Gasping for air as he twitched and slowly softened in your cunt.

The two of you stayed there for a few minutes, basking in the afterglow. Then König raised his head from your neck to look at you; his eyes were clouded through his hood. “Hey süßes mädchen (sweet girl), you with me?” he murmured. Holding your hips while he stayed inside, enjoying the warmth of your pussy.

You nodded lazily, your breathing still heavy. “Mhm, I'm with you.”

He nodded and looked at you, “Atta girl, took me so well, engel (angel).” you smiled at the praise feeling a low buzzing in your body that spread over you like a blanket. You let your head fall into his collarbone. “I can't feel my legs,” you giggled softly.

König held you a little tighter, “Like a good ‘I can't feel my legs’? Or a bad one?” He asked you and you hummed in response.

“Good, I think. But I'm not going to be able to walk.”

He grinned, “Well, that was kinda the idea, süßes mädchen (sweet girl).” You could only smile softly; you knew this was probably a wrong decision to do this again, but you couldn't care less at that moment. “I still hate you, by the way,” you murmured playfully into his collar. He chuckled, his fingers rubbing soothing circles around your hips.

“Look who's giving tough love now?” He mused.

Maybe that was all it was between you, tough love. Some unresolved tension that ate away at the both of you until it boiled over. But at that moment, you didn't mind. It was better not to think about that. For now, you just wanted to be.

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Hi, this is my first work. I'm not sure if I like it; it's rather bad. I haven't been on Tumblr that long, so I'm still getting everything sorted out. I'm not much of a writer, and I've never posted any works. If people like it, I'll probably write more, but otherwise, I don't see much of a point. This was kind of a one-off thing. But if you found it mildly entertaining, then I'm happy. And if you did make it this far, then thank you: much love, and happy holidays.

<3

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[vasito-de-leche]

;R1999 - Self-Aware AU

Headcanons about an Alternate Universe in which everyone knows they're living inside a videogame. However, Vertin is the only one aware of the entity inhabiting her own mind, the real conductor - the "Player".

this is one of my favorite AUs to slap on whatever media I'm into so here we are <3 not sure if anyone's done this already, but PLEASE PLEASE PRETTY PLEASE link me if you've seen any other ppl write for this AU! this one and any actor AUs are my absolute fave

this is just a word vomit introduction for fun, to get the basic ideas out of my head, so I can start writing for characters individually!

Okay, okay! First of all, some context for the AU before I go deranged overexplaining my HCs!

Aside from the "Storm", there is something else that haunts the people of this world: the fact that their lives are nothing but a simulacrum, part of a game.

The requirements to obtain this "self-awareness" is unknown. Those within the Foundation believe it's related to their respective "roles", that only the main and relevant characters are given the chance to fully open their eyes to the truth. Those within Manus Vindictae claim that one must be strong enough to break through the fog of complacency and their assigned scripts, to have their full potential unleashed and obtain true liberation. Either way, similar to the "Storm", this is a well-kept secret for a very good reason - everyone wants to have the upperhand.

There is one outlier to this whole system. Vertin is not only aware of the truth of this world, but also of her duty as the eyes and hands of the "Player". She must experience it all for their sake. Or rather, whatever she experiences will be the story that the Player will see.

This applies to her suitcase, the place where the Player's influence increases tenfold, bending everything and everyone to their will through her own body and voice. The longer one stays within her suitcase - or within her general vicinity - the easier it is for them to become self-aware.

How does one become "self-aware" and what does it entail?

The requirements and the catalyst for a character to become self-aware are still a mystery. But that's mostly because I specifically wanted to keep them as vague as possible, to allow some flexibility for NPCs and other characters outside of Vertin's suitcase.

The whole process of gaining sentience or self-awareness is mostly described as waking up from a nightmare, or a very, very realistic dream. It's like a switch, something that happens in a second without any warnings whatsoever.

I like to think that most of the people who wake up are easy to spot, because it's a jarring experience and panicking is the most normal reaction - but that they're often taken care of by the Foundation or recruited by Manus Vindictae.

The levels of awareness also depend heavily on each individual - some only know that nothing is truly real, that everything they've done up until that point was just a carefully scripted lie, the most basic realization. Others can understand the rules that govern this game and use them to their advantage, either through observation and study or just inherently.

Overall, the experience of being sentient varies as well, with some describing a disconnect from their body, while others feel exactly the opposite. Again, keeping it pretty vague so that people can fill in with their own ideas!

I'll talk about Vertin's case in detail when we get to her specific bullet point, but the same way the Player is able to experience the "story" through her eyes, she's able to see the same things they do - this includes the UI, the menus and everything you can interact with in-game.

Vertin as a character and a vessel for the Player.

The most common thing I've seen in self-aware AUs in my years of fandom is to turn the player stand-in (the main character that serves for the player to experience the story through and/or project onto, depending on the genre of the game) into an obstacle, one that keeps the characters from truly interacting with the Player, capital P.

The second most common thing I've seen is to simply ignore the existence of this player stand-in and replace it with the Player themself, either through isekai methods or thanks to the customization the game allows, etc etc.

When it comes to Vertin in this AU, I know I want her to retain her role as the center of everything, instead of being sidelined by the Player. She's THE Timekeeper, after all.

There's still some details I'm trying to iron out, like whether she's always been self-aware or if she became self-aware at some point during her childhood at the St. Pavlov Foundation. But I like to think that her relationship to the Player is a parallel to her immunity to the "Storm" - neither of these two things are inherently good nor bad. Surviving the "Storm" is helpful, sure, but it's painful for her. Having an entity like the "Player" haunting her is scary, sure, but it can be an advantage. It's a matter of how she utilizes the assets she was given, since her adaptability and determination are big aspects of her character. Vertin makes up for her mediocre arcane skills with unconventional plans and strategies.

But this isn't to say that Vertin isn't affected by the presence of the Player. Ironically, she's the one person whose freedom is limited. During battles, her skills and Tuning are available to you, they can also prove to be vital to win a fight, but in the end you're still the one calling the shots and choosing when her friends get to attack. You're the one choosing the layout of the Wilderness. You're the one picking which one of her friends deserves to become stronger.

In the last bullet point I mentioned that some characters can understand the rules of the game - Vertin is the most extreme case, as she can see the same UI as you do. She learns the way you like to fight your battles, your own strategies, she can see this and more.

Overall it's a very complex dynamic. It's not as easy as saying that she likes or dislikes you, that she considers you a friend or foe. You're part of her, you influence each other in many aspects and are stuck together for reasons she can't even fathom. While you may be able to read her thoughts most of the time, she becomes invisible once you enter the suitcase - the main menu of the game. Sure, the character you selected to greet you every day is actually talking to her, not you, but she's out of your view and therefore, out of our range. That's when Vertin wonders the sort of person that you are, if you care about her friends as much as she does. Are you playing just to be entertained? Are you invested in these events? Will you be there for her until the end of her story?

Another detail I like to think about is that Vertin is the only one who knows your name. Because at the very beginning, you were asked to input a name and she was there.

[screenshot was taken from this video, since it's the first one I could find that showed this specific part of the game lol]

Well, "your name" not quite right - she knows that whatever you wrote there is the name linked to your account, at least. And that's the name she knows you as.

Those who take residence in Vertin's suitcase or spend prolonged amounts of time with her, growing closer to her and all, end up becoming self-aware. This is a direct side-effect of your presence.

I like to think that characters who reach the 100% Bond can begin to sense the Player, to see the world in a similar way as Vertin does. Maybe even feel their presence EXACTLY like Vertin does whenever there's a battle. There is someone else on the other side of this screen, the fourth wall, who watches over them.

To some, it's hard to differentiate Vertin from the Player, as they just go hand in hand - but Sonetto, for example, has the easiest time telling the two apart.

On the subject of freedom and acting out of script.

The Foundation, Manus Vindictae, Laplace... It doesn't matter if they're self-aware and acting outside of what their script dictates, because they're missing one key ingredient: you. No one else but Vertin and her group knows about your existence, after all.

They don't know that the only story that matters is the one that Vertin is part of. The one that the Player gets to see and read and experience. And because the game gives you a very limited view into the lives of these characters, you don't know what neither Arcana nor Constantine do behind the scenes. You and Vertin don't see that, therefore, it never truly mattered.

Those most likely to start "acting out" are the troublemakers within Vertin's suitcase. Characters who are too curious for their own good, who are more susceptible to supernatural entities, who are just too impulsive - they would start to test the limits and see how far they can go, how much they can interact with the Player. Can the game be broken should they end up shattering the fourth wall? Is there a way for the Player to communicate with them? What will happen to Vertin?

I like to think that Vertin probably supports this, as she's rather curious herself, prone to questioning everything. She would also like to learn more about the Player, to truly tear into the game and see the full extent of your influence and her freedom.

Sometimes, Regulus and X will change their usual voicelines, just enough to be noticeable if one pays enough attention. Characters like Sotheby or Leilani might slip up and address the Player, rather than Vertin. Lilya, Pavia, Bkornblume have new animations and different expressions, ones you've never seen before - they stare ahead, as if searching for something, and then smirk or hum to themselves, deep in thought, like they realized something you're not privy of.

Sometimes, if you leave them as your selected assistant on the main menu, you can catch them muttering to themselves - idle quotes you never heard enough, about the outside world. Diggers does this the most, it's almost embarassing how easy it is to catch him talking nonsense, followed by Sonetto. If you leave Medicine Pocket alone for too long, you might come back to a screen covered in weird scratch marks.

On the subject of these characters being curious about the outside world and all, I think that a good chunk of them are generally content with the way things are?

We have to remember that in-universe, they're arcanists displaced from their respective eras. Their best chance at surviving is siding with Vertin, and if Vertin is content with the way things are, then there's no point in trying to disrupt what they have right now. They're curious enough to prod, but only as far as Vertin allows it.

And I think that's it for the word vomit!

There are some details I didn't know where to fit in, like the possibility of the fourth wall slowly dissipating the more time the Player invests in the game, leading to some characters being able to directly hear you if you talk while playing and whatnot. Or what would happen should someone outside of Vertin's suitcase figure out the existence of the Player, let alone interact with you in some way.

Or the concept of death being meaningless, unless it was pre-established by the game itself.

In Borderlands, there's this game mechanic where you can just be revived over and over and pay a percentage of your money as a fee, even though the canon that's established is that you play through the whole story without dying a SINGLE time - because the revival mechanics aren't canon. There's the divide between story and gameplay. That's pretty much the standard. But what about the deaths in battles in R1999? The amount of times I died to 1.3's UTTU's Flash Gathering is insane. How do self-aware characters feel about this, now that they know that they're bound to die over and over and be brought back because you have to do your Pneuma Analysis or reach the final stage of Limbo?

But that's pretty much it for now, I think I got most thoughts out of my system! Thank you for reading!

[babysfirstfic]

live now, think later

luke hughes x fem!reader

word count: 1.7k

summary: Luke desperately needs to blow off some steam. In a dingy bar, he finds just what he's looking for...

warnings: Brief allusions to sex, but nothing major. Yet. (18+)

a/n: This is my first ever fic! I would love to hear feedback if you have any. I plan for this to be chapter 1 of 3 (but we'll see what happens)! Shoutout to this Tate McRae song for directly inspiring the title and for subconsciously inspiring the plot.

There were few NHL rookies who had more eyes trained on them than Luke Hughes. Between the constant media attention he received from a young age and the pressure that came with his last name, Luke had always had a complicated relationship with his celebrity.

Don’t get it twisted, Luke was super grateful for all the advantages that came with having two all stars for brothers, and there was a part of him that enjoyed leaning into his status. 

On the ice, he welcomed the attention. He loved the chance to put on a show for the fans, reveling in the opportunities to make game-changing plays. Hockey was his craft; the minute he laced up his skates he was an artist, an author, a showman. A single goal could cause an entire stadium to rise to their feet, and the power he felt in those moments was indescribable.

Off the ice, though, it was a different story.

Luke prided himself on his maturity and his charm, his ability to keep his cool even while being peppered with questions and surrounded by cameras. He had years to perfect the art of the interview, expertly dodging personal inquiries and even cracking the occasional smile to make it seem like he didn’t absolutely despise answering the same inane questions over and over again. 

But one could only keep up appearances for so long. He found it exhausting to have to perform all the time. Though he understood it was a sacrifice he’d have to make now that he was living out his dreams, that didn’t make it any easier. 

After several months in the league, he craved a chance to be something other than “Luke Hughes, the hockey player”. He desperately needed to let loose and to make use of the other sides of his personality, the spicier sides, the sides that the cameras would never get to see. 

It was time for this Devil to earn his horns. 

Within the first few months of being in New Jersey, Luke quickly learned which bars would bend the rules for him. In his desperation to fit in with any teammate who didn’t share his DNA, he was willing to do pretty much anything to get in, buying fake IDs, signing jerseys, you name it. He felt it showed his teammates just how committed he was to building their relationships, on and off the ice. 

But tonight, his team couldn’t have been further from his mind. This time, he’d come alone. 

Luke had never had the time or energy for dating, but he thrived on quick hook ups and meaningless sex. No obligation for vulnerability or commitment, just fun. After the whirlwind that had been last year, he needed some fun, and tonight, he was willing to work for it. 

His bar of choice was dingy, a typical dive bar, complete with sticky floors and disgruntled employees, but the low key lighting and loud music allowed for the perfect cover. Luke felt a sense of safety in his anonymity, a feeling which was becoming increasingly rare. 

Waiting in a booth on the edge of the dimly lit room, he scanned the crowd, searching for a glimpse of excitement, someone to steal the blood from his brain and force it elsewhere. 

Suddenly, something, no someone caught his eye. It was you. 

In a glittery backless top with a loose, low cut and black pants that you filled out in all the right places, you were shaking your stuff on the dance floor. Your whole body bounced with every movement. Like a beacon in the night, the strobe lights illuminated your entirety, sending colourful fractals bouncing off in every direction. You were practically demanding Luke’s attention, and you didn’t even have to try. 

You had sensed his eyes on you immediately and couldn’t help but to return his gaze. He looked young but strangely sure of himself, carrying the recognizable swagger of a man who’s used to breaking the rules and getting away with it. Luke would call it confidence, but if you asked his brothers, they’d call it his raging youngest sibling syndrome. 

You were undeniably intrigued. Adding more hip movement to your dancing, you hoped that it would encourage him to join. This certainly was not your first rodeo. 

It worked. Slowly, he stood up from his booth and made his way onto the dance floor. You sensed a shift in his energy, like this was something out of the ordinary for him. “Nice to know he has a weakness,” you mused to yourself, just now noticing the flutter in your heart as he inched closer. 

Luke hated dancing, but something about you drew him in, like a ship of sailors drawn by the voices of sirens. Though he hoped he might meet a different fate; he hoped you might give him a happy ending. 

Eventually, he reached your spot on the dance floor. 

“Hey,” he spoke into your ear, leaning in close so that you could hear him above the music. You felt his breath tickle your neck, sending chills down your back and deep inside. 

“Hi,” you responded, keeping your cool in spite of the tides coming in beneath you. You didn’t know him, had never seen him before, yet everything within you yearned to be close to him, craved to feel his hand against your skin, begged to know him in every sense of the word. “Sheesh girl, you need to get out more,” you thought, smiling briefly to yourself.

Without wasting any time, you grabbed his hand and placed it on the small of your back, finally experiencing the brief release of skin-on-skin. You looked up at him, attempting to decipher the look on his face. He reciprocated your gaze, flashing his crooked smile, practically threatening to melt you right then and there. 

Seeing his smile mirrored on your face, he moved his other hand to match the first, pulling you in close. You nodded to express your approval and quickly fell back into your original rhythm, grinding and swaying your hips to the music. Sticking your hands in his back pockets, you led him through the motions, slowly undulating your bodies to the beat. 

Your eyes scanned up and down as you let yourself take him in. There was something about this boy; he completely captivated you. With his arms around you, you felt safe. He lacked the aggression and forcefulness you had unfortunately come to expect from situations such as these. He was clearly strong, but you caught him out of his comfort zone, so he was letting you take the lead, a role you took on gladly. 

After a couple minutes of finding the right rhythm, your bodies became one. The world melted away. Luke leaned in and began gently kissing your neck, stopping only to briefly nibble your ear. As your pelvises moved up and down to the beat, you began to feel the friction of something rising just below his belt. You responded in kind, sensing a growing heat and swelling between your legs. Neither of you had done this in a while and it was showing, your bodies overly excitable. But you didn’t mind; you were both getting exactly what you wanted. 

“I live a couple blocks from here,” you shouted above the crowd, doing everything in your power not to let out the moan that was threatening to escape your lips. “Maybe we could finish our dance there”. 

Knowing full well he couldn’t wait that long, Luke made a different suggestion. “There’s a hotel across the street. I have a room. Care to join me?” 

In the haze of the crowd and the music and the night, you found yourself moving off the dance floor, out of the bar, into the open air of Newark. 

Your entire body was pounding, throbbing with energy and excitement. Your hand was clasped in his, and only then, as you were making your way through the hotel lobby and down the hallway to the room, did you realize you didn’t even know his name. More importantly, you realized you didn’t care. In fact, it was better this way. No possibility of getting attached or contacting each other afterwards. A true one night stand. 

As you reached the room, Luke spun you around to face him, your back firmly placed against the door. “Are you sure you want to do this?” he asked, leaning close, finally allowing you to get a good look at his face in the light.  

Your gaze trailed down from his curls to his lips, before resting on his eyes. You noticed a slight sparkle in them, a glint, an invitation. This was your chance. “I’ve never been more sure,” you responded.

Lunging forward instinctively, you reached up, taking hold of his hair and guiding his lips towards yours. Your touch was confident, verging on forceful, a byproduct of the pent up energy that needed an outlet and had finally found one. 

Maybe you were a little too forceful. As your bodies collided, they also made contact with the door, sending a loud noise vibrating through the hallway. You briefly paused your moment of passion to laugh, your foreheads still touching, neither of you daring to fully pull away. 

“Someone’s a little eager,” Luke spoke against your lips, chuckling slightly before re-initiating the kiss. 

Just as it had in the bar, the world melted away, making you forget just how publicly you were displaying your affection. 

But you were both being reckless, and Luke knew it. He had been warned about pulling something like this, about bringing negative attention to himself or to the team. He was new and still needed to prove himself. Above all that, he had a squeaky clean reputation to uphold. He was trained to be tight-lipped to the media so that the focus was on his playing, not his personal life. Stunts like this could jeopardize everything he’d worked for, everything his parents sacrificed for. But god, you were making him forget all of that. There wasn’t a single thought in Luke’s mind that didn’t have to do with getting you out of your clothes and under his tongue...

[i-amyou]

Where do you wanna go?

What are you trying to reach? What do you think, lies beyond this dream, this illusion?

You wanna reach it, desperately. Right now, isn't it? Not in a minute, not in an hour, but right now.

This race to get somewhere isn't gonna take you anywhere, take it from someone who felt like you, hopeless with nowhere to go. Just wanting to reach that state of pure bliss everyone talked about, all the time.

"Maybe at night, maybe tomorrow...in a week, in a month..no, I don't wanna wait any longer. I want it now."

That cycle continued over and over, until one day. When I gave up, only to realise I've always been this bliss I've been seeking. It was funny, underwhelming, overwhelming all at the same time.

How can it be so easy? There's gotta be more to it, right? I understand. But as disappointing as it might sound, there is nothing more to it.

Is there even a single minute where you are not aware of just Being? Of existing. And no I'm not talking about the body you identify with.

You are aware, no matter what. Aware of joy, unconditional happiness, momentary sadness, struggles, and what not? You are always aware. Aware of being aware.

While you sleep, while you're seemingly awake, while you dream, you are aware.

And that Awareness is absolute. That awareness is what you are.

Your existence is such a simple and absolute thing, that you don't even look that way as long as you breathe. Always focused on the seeming external, as you keep seeking. When your BEING is all there is. It's that simple. Beyond This seemingly appearance of body and mind, you Exist. Always have. And will continue to do so.

No existence and no experience is separate from you.

There's no Here, no There. No up and no down. No in And no out. It's all happening within you, this momentary appearance of there being a person who's seemingly experiencing this, it's all within Oneness.

There's No one. No thing. No where. It's all " ".

Just THAT experiencing itself. THAT is the experience.

You don't have to go anywhere. You've always been what you are seeking. Not a single moment went by without your Awareness of it. When you lost yourself. When you lost sight of your true nature.

Take a deeper look, go within. It's all You. It's as easy as that. Enough wandering around, you just need to notice this simple thing right now.

You ARE. You can never not Be. And that's the only truth.