#ketsugi chie

[britishassistant]

But I Like One Piece (20)

They all turn to stare at him.

“Dear? How do you know that?” Okaa-san says.

Otou-san shakes his head and sits down heavily on the stairs. “The manufacturer for those weapons is in Yukigakure. Just like the incriminating ryo left at the scene of that theft.”

Oh.

Oh sweet Merry.

She mutters, “Shika said—when we were talking about the theft, he said it had to be an inside job, because an outsider couldn’t know anything. But if they were like me—if they’d read the comic based on Konoha in their past life, they would know. They’d know almost everything even if they never set foot here.”

She swallows, throat suddenly dry. “If it was plot-relevant, then they’d know more about what was valuable and how it was defended than people who’d lived here their whole lives. They’d even know the weaknesses of the ninja sent after them, if those ninja were major characters.”

Otou-san nods. “And if he or she needed to finance the manufacture of those weapons, what could be easier than to steal something from here and sell it to another hidden village?”

She sits down heavily on the stairs.

Her heart’s pounding too fast. The side of her head is throbbing in time with the beat.

“Well.” Okaa-san coughs. “That’s mildly terrifying.”

She lets out a humorless chuckle at the understatement.

Horror wars with elation in her brain. Elation at the knowledge that she isn’t alone here.

Horror at the idea of someone knowing everything about this place and deciding to use that knowledge for their own gain. If robbing Konoha wasn’t low for them, would they stoop to manipulating Naruto, Sakura, Uchiha? To hurting them to get their way, change a narrative they don’t like?

“But Iruka-sensei said Yukigakure gave us those guns for less money than they gave them to other villages.” Naruto says suddenly. “Maybe that’s the not-Mayu’s way of making it up to us?”

“You think villains who would commit such an unyouthful action would be capable of feeling guilt?” Lee says doubtfully. “Shouldn’t we tell Gai-sensei about this?”

“We can.” Otou-san sighs. “But I’m not sure how helpful it would be. Nara-san said Yamanaka-san knew about the Yuki connection between both the theft and these “guns”. For all we know, the price reduction could be a concession negotiated between the Hokage and the thief, and we just have a morsel of knowledge about that deal which would endanger Mayu more than it would help the village.”

She fidgets, tracing the scar on her lower lip.

Lee’s brows are furrowed, his mouth pulled down in a frown.

Okaa-san reaches out and smooths a hand over his hair. “Why don’t we get Ichiraku’s and sleep on it? I think Sanji would agree we’ll all make better decisions with some ramen in our bellies.”

Naruto springs to his feet. “Yeah! Ramen’ll fix everything, believe it! C’mon, I’m hungry, let’s go, let’s go!”

It doesn’t quite fix everything, she reflects later as she descales and fillets the pike for the offerings tomorrow. There’s still another reincarnated person who robbed the village, had her father take the fall for their crime, and is now mass-producing the very weapon that killed her past self, which they can do next to nothing about.

But ramen smoothed out the crease in Lee’s brow when they all agreed it was better to tell Gai-sensei than not. It lightened the mood and made everything this day had thrown at them seem a little less important in light of the celebrations planned for tomorrow.

Their small garden is now even smaller thanks to the a large wooden structure that sits next to the back fence.

It’s a bit like a cross between a shed and a greenhouse, if it only had three walls and no doors or windows. The roof is curved and the walls are sturdy, to protect the shrines inside from the elements.

There’s a length of thick white rope fastened with red twine inside the front gable, which is meant to ensure that the shrines are protected from malicious spirits.

Each one of the shrines has a small building that is sealed automatically once the shrine has been assembled, keeping a small object for the deity to inhabit safely locked away from prying eyes. There’s a small recess before this structure, for offerings to be placed, and a little column that puts them above the eye level of a kneeling person.

They’d debated setting aside a space for the shrines in the living room inside the house, to ensure they could be protected and cared for. But she kept getting impulses of outside, of wind and rain, freedom, that eventually they decided it was better than keeping them cooped up inside.

Plus this way, Luffy can’t raid the fridge as easily.

She’s already found certain small cuts of cooked meat have gone missing. If he’s anything like the manga, then she’s not giving him the chance to clean out the entire fridge.

They’ve been working on constructing it and the shrines on weekends and in the mornings during training. According to Gai-sensei, it’s excellent practice for C-rank missions.

Now all that’s left is to paint the structure and the ten shrines housed within.

Working out what to set out as offerings for tomorrow had been a challenge and a half.

For the most part, the Strawhats can be grouped into small sections of what they will and won’t eat.

Nami and Chopper are fruit lovers. Sanji, Zoro, Brook and Usopp are partial to seafood. Luffy, Franky, and Robin are happy with beef and other land-based meats.

However, Zoro, Sanji and Brook like varieties of seafood that are difficult to get in Konoha— octopus, lobster and prawns are expensive and hard to find, while sea king meat just doesn’t exist here. At least Zoro is happy enough with a traditional plate-2-bowls meal with rice.

Robin prefers sandwiches, and she’s not quite sure if the burgers Franky loves fit into that criteria. Chopper can’t stand spicy or bitter foods, but Zoro and Robin dislike sweets.

She’s just thankful that Luffy, Nami Usopp, and Merry are so easy to feed. Pike’s one of the few fish that Konoha doesn’t need to import, so it and tangerines relatively inexpensive.

There’s no chance of combining all their preferences into one dish. Her head hurts just imagining the clash of flavors.

So she had to somehow come up with a way of creating a meal that would (hopefully) make each of the pirates she idolizes happy.

No pressure.

Chouji ended up being her savior in this respect.

And maybe Uchiha did as well, but only a teeny tiny bit.

She’d been brainstorming different versions of meals she could try making that would satisfy everyone, but kept coming up short.

The added tension from Sakura’s friendly-again-but-still-not-quite-sitting-back-at-their-table thing at this time wasn’t exactly helping her think either.

“I’ve got cola, coffee, tea, heck even sake, but still no idea on what to pair any of them with.” She complained, tapping her pencil against the list in front of her.

Chouji had leaned over, a thoughtful look on his face. “Why not make them lunchboxes? That way you can make lots of things in smaller amounts and personalize each lunchbox for each of them.”

“Hm. That is a good idea.” She gnawed on her lower lip. “Only downside is working out when I can cook what and how much time the preparation of each portion is going so everything in the bentos is relatively fresh for when it’s offered... how much d’you think eleven more lunchboxes would cost?”

She’d just begun sketching out lines for a tentative timetable when Uchiha complained, “Why do you think you’ve gotta do everything on your own?”

She looked up, a little offended. “I’m not praying for help with this, are you mad? That’d be like asking someone to bake their own birthday cake.”

“What Sasuke means,” Chouji intervened. “Is that we could always split the work three-ways between us, and bring it to your house on the day?”

She blinked. “You...you guys would help me like that?”

Chouji smiled, then made a squeak of surprise when she lunged over the table to hug him tightly. “Thank you.”

“I have lunchboxes to spare.” Uchiha drawled. “Plus someone’s got to make sure you don’t mess up.”

She had then let Chouji go so she could boot Uchiha in the shin.

As a result of this arrangement, when she wakes up on The Day, all she has to worry about is preparing the pasta for Sanji, Nami and Usopp’s lunchboxes after training with Gai-sensei.

She’s almost worried that her timining be a little delayed because Gai-sensei grabs her in a bone-creaking hug when she arrives at training and spends about three minutes weeping over how youthful she is.

He then makes them run fifty times around the village balancing the paint pots they’ll be using later to ensure that the paint is agitated enough “so its most YOUTHFUL colors will shine through!!”

They nearly lose the purple when Naruto fumbles slightly over a root.

She bolts down her food at breakfast.

She puts on more rice again in preparation for the sesame onigiri, and pulls out a pot to fill with water that’s set to boil and a pan to gently heat some oil on the stove.

She smashes a clove of garlic and drops it in when the oil has begun to smoke gently, deseeding and dicing up some chilis and tossing them in as well for flavor.

She can’t help her grin when the heady spicy-savory scent fills the air, finely chopping capers and anchovies to toss in once she’s fished out the smashed garlic.

The scent mellows somewhat when the diced pike hits the pan as well, and she pushes it around until the fish is almost-but-not-quite cooked through.

Then in with a generous glug of wine and the heat is turned down to a gentle simmer to let the alcohol cook off.

Just in time for the rice to have cooked and cooled enough to begin mixing with yellow and black sesame seeds and begin forming into ten onigiri.

They don’t have any fillings other than the sesame, because they’re designed to take the edge off the stronger flavors of the pasta (her) and the takoyaki (Chouji), as well as serve as a substitute for a sesame topped bun accompanying the hamburger steaks (Uchiha).

The others begin to arrive at around ten.

Sakura and the Harunos arrive first alongside Ino and her dad.

She shouts a hello as Naruto and Lee lead Ino and Sakura through the kitchen to the back garden, nails orange with peeled tangerine.

Ino darts forward and steals two slices, chortling in response to her indignant “Oi!” and passing one to Sakura, who grins as she nibbles on their way out.

Yamanaka-san is totally at home chatting with Gai-sensei and Otou-san, but he snickers when Nara-san immediately gravitates towards him when he arrives. Shikamaru gives her a nod as he follows the adults outside and she puts the pasta on to boil.

She’s set aside two extra tangerines for when Shino and his father arrive. After all, she, Chouji and Uchiha are making enough to feed eleven deities and many many people, so shouldn’t their insects also be able to eat as well?

Shino’s dad stares at her inscrutably when she explains her reasoning, before accepting the fruit with a nod and a “thank you” barely audible over a loud buzzing.

Shino shifts from one foot to the other during this exchange before gently tugging his father’s sleeve. It occurs to her as she drains the pot-full pasta and adds the sauce alongside a cup of boiling water to emulsify everything that this might be the closest she’s ever seen him to being embarrassed.

Chouji and his dad arrive as she’s sprinkling in some parsley as a finishing touch.

They’re both carrying huge containers full of takoyaki and cooked spring greens, and she spares a small moment to be envious of all the amazing things Chouji’s family can afford to do.

Then she launches Chouji another hug to thank him for all his help once he’s set his cargo down.

He squeaks like he did last time and Akimichi-san laughs loudly, for some reason.

Iruka-sensei and Uchiha arrive with eleven lunchboxes, two dogs, Kiba and his mum, and Hinata in tow.

Uchiha keeps sneaking what appear to be morsels of meat to Akamaru and Kuromaru.

There’s also a pale-eyed frowning boy who Iruka-sensei introduces as Hyuuga Neji, Hinata’s cousin who’d been sent along to act as her chaperone.

The boy sniffs disdainfully when they greet him and goes to stand in a corner of the garden near Mebuki, completely ignoring Lee when he waves to him.

She doesn’t think she likes Hinata’s cousin very much.

The lunchboxes Uchiha brought are black lacquer decorated with gold and red tomoe, much fancier than anything she’d been expecting.

When questioned, he just shrugs and says, “It’s just old stuff from New Year’s. It’s just taking up space at home, so it’s better off here.”

She knows better than to say anything like “sorry”, so she just pats his shoulder and says “No, that compartment’s too small for the onigiri, put it in this one.”

“That’s way too big, it looks tiny in that one.” Uchiha snaps, but with a bit less bite than usual.

Iruka-sensei looks mildly overwhelmed by all the people in the back garden. Okaa-san comes along, hands him a drink, pats his shoulder and says “They’re in my house,” in a sympathetic tone.

Iruka-sensei gives her a pitying look and knocks the sake back in one go.

Adults here can be weird.

Finally they’ve finished serving and she calls out “Food’s up!”

The adults come in to help take the larger platters of food outside, a huge plate of pasta, several smaller hamburger steaks in the style of what they’d call “sliders” in her world, and mound upon mound of takoyaki and spring greens and tangerines.

There’s a clamor outside as people begin getting their portions.

She, Chouji and Uchiha are each balancing either three or four lunchboxes per person as they take them outside.

Sakura is helping Kiba paint a pattern of cherry blossoms across Chopper’s already vibrantly pink shrine. Evidence of her handiwork on Robin’s shrine is clear is the decoration of swirling petals and the streaks of matching purple paint all over her forehead.

Ino and Naruto obviously have had a battle over the orange judging by the splashes on their hands and clothing. On the plus side Nami and Luffy’s shrines are looking particularly colorful.

Shikamaru and Hinata are splotched with green, light blue and black-and-white. Lee is smudged with brown, cyan and white paint and beaming proudly.

Shino has yellow paint on the end of his nose and is looking at the detailed illustrations of insects on the sides with pride.

The only shrines that aren’t quite done are Sanji’s, which has a blue overcoat but no decoration, and Zoro’s which doesn’t have half its roof painted yet.

“We were waiting,” Naruto says, holding out two buckets of green paint and blue respectively, “For you guys to add your bits.”

She beams at him.

Of course, Uchiha has to ruin it by immediately grabbing the green.

“What?” He says, offloading his three lunchboxes onto Kiba. “I’ll give it back once I’m finished with it.”

Ino rolls her eyes and shoulders her paintbrush, adding another orange splotch to her outfit. “Ugh. I’ll help Mayu-chan, it’s better to get it done quickly. Let’s go before the food gets cold.”

Orange, red, and yellow fish on the blue background are much more vibrant and eye-catching than green, though Uchiha does “help” by flicking the paintbrush at her while she’s distracted.

In thanks, she smears yellow on the back of his neck.

After the extra decorations are finished, Lee, Sakura and Kiba redistribute the lunchboxes to make their offerings.

The only problem is there’s eleven of them and ten lunchboxes.

“You all go ahead.” She steps back. “I’ll do the next bit.”

Each one of them place the pirate lunchboxes down in front of the shrines and step back.

For some reason, she feels like traditional prayers and chants appropriated from the sage guy won’t really be all that welcoming to them.

But then, what? What could help them feel at home at these shrines, so far from the sea?

Her gaze falls on Brook’s shrine.

Oh.

Oh, well it’s obvious when it’s put like that, isn’t it?

She just hopes she remembers the words correctly. She doesn’t want to butcher them on accident.

“Yohohoho, yohohoho~ Yohohoho, yohohoho~”

Her voice sounds frail and quiet, and she can feel everyone’s eyes on her. Still, she stumbles through the last two refrains of yohohoho’s to the first verse.

“Binksu no sake wo, todokei ni yuku yo, umikaze, kimakase, namimakase~ Shio no mukou de, yuhi wo sawagu, sora nya, wao kaku tori no uta~”

Naruto joins in on the next verse, singing along slightly out of tune and mixing up some of the words.

His cheeks look as flushed as hers feel, and it’s hard not to giggle when they catch each other’s eyes. Somehow they both manage to keep singing.

Gai-sensei and Lee boisterously shout DON alongside them as they join as well, Gai-sensei’s voice strong and sure, while Lee’s volume makes up for any deficiencies in wording. She almost can’t hear Okaa-san’s melodious voice and Otou-san’s decidedly tone-deaf one join in on the second set of Yohohoho’s over their noise.

Sakura and Ino’s voices are both high-pitched, but they carry the tune well enough. So does Kiba, though he’s pitching up to a falsetto for some reason. Hinata’s voice is soft, but she’s genuinely singing, unlike Shikamaru and Sasuke who’re mumbling through all the bits apart from the yohohoho’s. Shino is monotone if precise and enthusiastic, while Chouji has a surprising set of pipes on him.

Akamaru is just howling to the beat. And with that accompaniment, how could anyone stop themselves from singing along?

It feels like more people than could possibly fit into their house and garden are bellowing Bink’s Sake together by the time they’ve reached the third set of Yohohoho’s.

It can’t exactly be called “harmonious”. Everyone’s a little out of tune, a little off beat.

But the mixing of all the voices of her family and friends feels so right, it makes her voice stronger, lets her sing louder.

She opens her eyes and nearly chokes on the next note.

Hovering in front of the brightly painted shrines, slightly faded but gaining color and substance with every passing moment, They stand.

Merry appears in all her glory, as if in mid- sail. Brook is playing his violin, a foot tapping to the beat. Franky is winding up for his SUPA pose, grinning broadly. Robin is resting a hand on Chopper’s hat. Chopper himself is peeking at them the wrong way round from Robin’s leg.

Sanji’s tapping out his cigarette with a grin and giving a small salute. Usopp is waving to them, like a captain would to his 8,000 followers. Nami’s blowing a kiss as if to adoring fans.

Zoro...is climbing over the garden fence and jogging to take his place in front his shrine next to the others. Nami shoots him a Look while Luffy laughs at him, sitting in mid air and clapping his feet together.

The Captain of the Straw Hat Pirates then turns to her and gives her a wide grin.

She blinks away tears as he and his crew fade away with the last notes of the song.

The food in the lunchboxes is gone.

The food on Naruto’s plate is also gone.

In fact, all the food in the immediate vicinity appears to be gone.

It’s just that Naruto looks down at his plate and yells in indignation first.

She lets out a wet laugh. “Darn it Luffy.”

[britishassistant]

But I Like One Piece (19)

She opens her eyes.

There are insects on her face.

Oh Luffy, there are so many insects on her face.

It’s only years of practice and the knowledge of how upset Shino will be with her that prevents her from swatting wildly.

“Why are there insects on my face.” She mumbles, moving her lips as little as possible and lifting a hand to her cheek so some of them can scuttle off and onto her fingers.

She doesn’t want any falling into her mouth on accident.

“Because my kikaichū are capable of injecting small doses of chakra into your system, which restores your reserves and helps return the body to homeostasis.” Shino extends his hand and the remaining insects begin flitting off her face back up his sleeves.

Her confusion must show on her face, because he sighs. “Chakra injections to help you wake up.”

“Oh. Thank you.”

Shino inclines his head as he retracts his arm, all insects safely retrieved.

She struggles to sit up. One side of her head throbs a little.

“How are you feeling, Ketsugi-chan?” Iruka-sensei asks. “Do you feel dizzy or nauseous at all?”

She shakes her head. “No, Iruka-sensei.”

He purses his lips and tilts her head to the side, before pulling a small flashlight out of his jacket pocket and shining it in her eyes. “No bumps, and your pupils seem normal...what caused you to collapse, Ketsugi-chan? Can you remember?”

Her breath stutters in her throat at the thought.

“I don’t. Like them. The g— them. Those.”

Iruka-sensei blinks. “The weapons? They upset you?”

She nods mutely.

“Seriously?” Uchiha mutters. “First chakra and now this?”

“Sasuke-kun!” Iruka-sensei scolds, though his tone is slightly exasperated. “Well, if you feel bad again, be sure to let me know, okay Ketsugi-chan?”

Her mind won’t stop racing, even after they return to the classroom.

How, how, how, how can those—those things be here?!

This world is supposed be a ninja story, where people use taijutsu and chakra and kunai and katana to fight.

She’s pretty certain none of the flame wars in her past life ever talked about any characters bringing shitty g-firearms to the mix.

And not just any firearms either.

Nothing like the older models found in One Piece and museums of her old world, where the bullet and gunpowder needed to be inserted separately into the barrel of the g— of the weapon before firing.

The existence of that older type of weapon here might make a small amount of sense at least.

No, those were high-tech, modern firearms, the kind with cartridges that are inserted at the bottom of the handle, with bullets that have gunpowder built into the casing, that are pointed so they can pierce—

She only narrowly keeps herself from retching.

Naruto keeps shooting her worried glances as the day goes on.

He’s resorted to scribbling what happened?? on the edges of her notebook by the time the last lesson of the day draws to a close.

She does her best to placate him with weak smiles and shaking her head discreetly, but that seems to have the opposite effect judging by the way his brows furrow.

Shikamaru keeps staring at her as well.

However, it’s not the same as the concerned looks that Chouji, Ino, Hinata, Sakura, Shino and even Kiba keep giving her.

He’s staring at her like he knows something isn’t right.

Like he suspects something.

She does her best to avoid his gaze when they leave the classroom.

Lee meets them outside the Academy.

His greeting trails off as Naruto grabs his hand and drags the pair of them over to the tree swingset.

“Naruto-kun, what’s going on?” He asks, brows furrowing.

“Mayu passed out when she saw the weapons from Yuki.” Naruto accuses, arms crossed over his chest and brows furrowed. “And don’t say it’s nothing, ‘cause you’re still pale and shaky. Not even chakra has ever done that to you, believe it.”

She glances down at her trembling hands. She squeezes them together to try and make the tremors stop.

“Mayu-chan.” She looks up when Lee claps his hands on her shoulders, staring her dead in the eyes. “Are you okay?”

She starts to nod.

Lee raises an eyebrow.

She doesn’t end up shaking her head but it’s a near thing.

“I’m—” She cuts herself off. “I’m not alright, but. It’s not something I ca-need to talk about. Can we just go?”

Naruto’s brow furrows even further and he makes a face. It’s the same face he made when confronting Ami over bullying Sakura, or confiding his worries about Uchiha’s diet in her. It’s his “I’m not happy and going to do something about it” face.

Lee’s frowning too, now gripping her hands tight. “You can talk to us about anything, Mayu-chan. You know that, right?”

Unseen stares from the surrounding trees bore into her as she nods. She very carefully does not look up.

She flounders for something, anything to make them understand.

“It’s a Tamara thing.” She hisses quietly.

It takes them a moment, but then sweet, merciful understanding flashes across Naruto and Lee’s faces, the pair of them stiffening like they’ve been pricked with pins.

“Ah! Is that so!” Lee’s laugh is too loud, too boisterous to anyone who knows him well. She prays to Robin that the masks don’t. “Well thank Luffy it’s nothing to worry about, right Naruto-kun?”

“Y-Yeah!” Naruto agrees, hesitating a fraction of a second too long for comfort. “You shoulda told us that’s all it was earlier, Mayu-chan, I was worried over nothing, believe it!”

She feels an eyebrow twitch, but tries to contort her expression into an apologetic smile. “Sorry, it’s just a little embarrassing, you know,” She fakes a laugh. “Girl problems and all that.”

“I see! Girl problems! Of course!” Lee says, clearly not understanding at all.

She takes a moment to wonder what exactly the boys do while the girls are in kunoichi classes.

Naruto loops an arm around her shoulders. “Yosh! Let’s get home then! Oka— Mayu’s okaa-san will be waiting for us, believe it!”

“Well said Naruto-kun!” Lee loops an arm around her other shoulder. “Yosh! Onwards!”

The three of them frogmarch home, chattering loudly about nothing.

They could not be more conspicuous if they were dressed in animal costumes and singing a musical number.

The unseen stares following them now have an added side of judgement which she does not appreciate.

She’s already racing upstairs to grab her coats and yukata when they all tumble through the front door.

“Welcome ba—” Okaa-san gives her an odd look when she clatters back down the stairs, clothes in her arms. “—Mayu? What’s going on?”

“We’re home Chie-oba-san! Nothing happened at all!” Lee proclaims in the same breath as Naruto blurts, “Mayu passed out!”

Okaa-san blinks, then grabs her shoulder as she makes for the front door. “Not your nice yukata, young lady, I just finished ironing it again. Go get your towel instead. Then you’re all going to sit down here and tell me exactly what happened calmly. Understand?”

“Yes, okaa-san.” They chorus meekly

Naruto calls dibs on telling his side of the story first.

She begins to regret letting him a few moments after he opens his mouth and launches into an embellished retelling of how she made a wheezing noise at the mere sight of the weapons and dropped to the ground like a broken mast, startling everyone and interrupting Uchiha.

He’s tearing up as he continues, “An’, an’ Mayu just wouldn’t wake up, no matter what, even when I shook her an’ everythin’ believe it, an’ Iruka-sensei yelled at me because he said I mighta’ hurt you worse, an’ then Shino did his bug thing an’ you woke up but you were still so pale an’ shaky an’ scared but you wouldn’ say anything, an’, an’—”

Okaa-san pulls him into a hug as he trails off into frustrated hiccoughs, rubbing his back soothingly.

Lee’s grip on her hand is so tight it’s beginning to hurt a bit.

“Well, Mayu?” Okaa-san says, voice slightly strained. “Was that what happened?”

“K-kind of?” She shifts forward so she can give Naruto a one-armed hug. “Sorry I scared you, I was just...just really, really freaked out. I never meant to scare you too.”

“...s’okay.” He mutters into her hair. “Dun’ do it ‘gain, kay?”

She nuzzles into his shoulder, “I’ll try. Promise.”

Lee gives a cough behind her. “So...what alarmed you about those weapons, Mayu-chan?”

She stiffens, drawing back out of the hug.

“They— they aren’t right.” Her head throbs. “Maybe if it was earlier, a prototype model, maybe. But that kind of g—of weapon shouldn’t be here, shouldn’t even exist.”

Okaa-san’s brow furrows. “What do you mean by that?”

“I mean it shouldn’t exist!” She snaps. “This place prizes ch-chakra too much for their existence to make sense! You lot place a premium on throwing projectiles and close combat because chakra allows you to compensate. The existence of those kind of g— of firearm doesn’t make any sense, because there’s not a need for that kind here like there was in my world, it just, it just doesn’t make any sense, why is it here, why is it here?!”

Her breathing is ragged.

Her head hurts.

Everything’s so blurry she can barely see.

“Mayu-chan?” Lee’s voice sounds very small. “Does that mean those weapons are from your world?”

“I don’t wanna get shot again.” She chokes out. “I don—I—it hurt so much last time.”

Lee hugs like he’s trying to both squeeze the pain out of her and shield her from it ever returning.

It’s almost painful how tight his arms are around her shoulders, but it does help ground her somewhat.

Then there’s softness pressing against her side and Okaa-san’s arm is curling around Lee’s shoulders to pull them both to her, burying her face in the crown of Mayu’s head.

Naruto reaches over and threads his fingers with hers from where he’s curled into Okaa-san’s other side, squeezing as hard as he can.

They stay like that for a long time.

They startle when the front door snags on her winter coat when it opens.

“I’m baaa-ah? Darling, is the door broken?” Otou-san asks, poking his head through the small gap at the threshold.

“Welcome home Jirou-oji-san!” Lee waves.

“Otou-san! It’s coat and stair time!” Naruto yells. “You gotta come in right now, believe it!”

“Hang on, I need to get the door unstuck first!” Otou-san replies. “Hm...maybe if I unscrewed the hinges...”

Okaa-san gives a weak chuckle. “Mayu-chan, go pick up your coat before it rips or your father dismantles the front door.”

Otou-san smiles at her when she opens the door properly, coat in hand. “I’m home, Mayu.”

“Welcome back, Otou-san.”

The smile drops slightly when he gets a good look at her, and he reaches out to brush a thumb over her temple. “Ouch. How’d this happen?”

She winces slightly at the pressure. “I fainted at the Academy. It’s...a long story.”

Otou-san gives her a searching look, then turns that stare on the interior of the front hall, where her raincoat and towel block the entrances to the kitchen and the living room.

He closes the front door behind him and lays her winter coat back at the bottom of the threshold. “Well, I’d better hear it sooner rather than later, hadn’t I?”

She’s a little proud that she’s able to say, “I freaked out at the sight of the weapon that killed me in my past life” on the third try without blubbering.

Much.

Okaa-san drums her fingers on her arm. “How can you be sure that these weapons are from your world? After all, your world had katana and kunai and other weapons that are found here— maybe it’s just that our technology is beginning to catch up to yours.”

She shrugs in Otou-san’s hug. “I’d believe that if they weren’t so...so modern. This world relies on c-chakra a lot, which makes bladed weapons and thrown projectiles much more viable than they are in mine. We haven’t even been taught about the existence of g-firearms at the Academy before today. Yet, despite that, those things are just as if not more advanced than the ones from my world, with no precedent.”

“Yeah!” Naruto nods decisively. “What’s a preceden?”

“It’s when certain things have to happen first for something to exist.” Okaa-san explains. “Like you need to have eggs if you want to make omelette rice.”

Otou-san hums. “You’ve never spoken to anyone else about your past life, have you Mayu?”

She shakes her head. “Only you lot and Gai-sensei. And I wouldn’t tell anyone about...those things.”

“Where is Gai-sensei, anyway?” Naruto asks.

“He has a mission today.” Okaa-san says. “He dropped by earlier to say he would be back in time for training tomorrow morning.”

Lee nods, smile small and happy.

Then he leans against Okaa-san, arms crossed. “So if the guns are from Mayu’s past life, but Mayu-chan didn’t have anything to do with their creation, how did they get from that world to here?”

She purses her lips. She’d like to know that herself.

Naruto closes his eyes and tilts his head from side to side, like a dog trying to listen to something. “Hmmm...a wizard...no, a mindreader...Iwa nin...hmm...Mayu’s evil twin...magic teleporting frog...”

She snorts and opens her mouth—

Then freezes.

“Naruto, what did you just say?”

Naruto blinks. “Magic teleporting frog?”

“Wh-no! Before that!” She says, mind whirring a million miles a minute.

There’s a moment as Naruto’s lips work soundlessly, going back through what he said.

Then his eyes widen and he rears back. “What the heck?! Mayu—you—you have an evil twin and never told me?!”

“You think I would’ve noticed if that was the case.” Okaa-san mutters.

“Kaa-san!” She yelps, flustered. “And no I don’t have an evil twin—that’s not the point!”

“What is it?” Lee leans around Okaa-san to stare curiously at her.

“It’s just an idea, I don’t have any proof for it or anything,” She gently digs her teeth into her lower lip. “But when Naruto said ‘evil twin’, it made me think what if—what if there is someone out there who was like me? What if I’m not the only one who was reborn into this world from mine?”

The room goes still.

“If such a person did exist, why would they do this?” Otou-san asks carefully. “Why manufacture and export these weapons, if there’s no real need for them here?”

She shrugs. “Money? Power, maybe? I-I don’t know, I have no idea. It’s just— nothing else makes sense, does it?”

There’s a sharp rap at the front door.

They all freeze.

“Dear. Gai said he wouldn’t be back from his mission today until tomorrow morning, didn’t he.” Okaa-san says.

Otou-san stands, one hand on his bokken. “Yes. He did.”

He moves towards the door, while Okaa-sama pushes them behind her, hissing, “Go upstairs to the door of our bedroom. Do not come down until we call you.”

After a moment, her towel and coats are lobbed up after them.

The zip on her winter coat smacks her in the lip.

She pulls it off her head in time to hear her father faintly say, “...Nara-sama! What an unexpected surprise!”

“Geez, Nara-sama’s such a drag. Nara-san will do just fine.” The lazy drawl floats up to them as Naruto leans forward to try and get a glimpse of Shikamaru’s dad, towel wrapped around his shoulders like a cape.

“Thank you very much, Nara-san. Would you like to come in?” Okaa-sama asks as Lee fidgets with the zipper on her raincoat.

“Nah, we’ll be quick. Shikamaru here just wanted to check with your kid, see if this whole shrine thing tomorrow is still going on.”

“Oh! Well we haven’t discussed that with her yet, so we’ll call her down.” She only gets a brief moment to panic before Okaa-san is raising her voice. “Mayu-chan! It’s one of your friends from the Academy for you!”

She shoves the coat behind her and traipses down the stairs.

“Hello Nara-san,” She says, a fake smile plastered across her face. “Hey Shika.”

“Yo.” Shikamaru replies.

His eyes still have that assessing quality from earlier.

He knows nothing, she tells herself. He hasn’t figured out you’re reincarnated, he doesn’t know there’s anything to figure out, please, please Sanji don’t let him figure anything out.

“So,” Shikamaru says suddenly, startling her. “How’s the head? It’d be troublesome if you woke up tomorrow too hurt to fix up the shrines.”

She touches the bruised area. “It’s a little sore, but I should be fine for tomorrow!”

“Are you sure, Mayu?” Okaa-san squeezes her shoulders. “We could always reschedule for next weekend if you aren’t up for it.”

“But Okaaa-saaan,” There’s a series of thumps as Naruto slides down the stairs one step at a time. “We’ve been waiting ages for this! Oh, hi Shika!”

“Hey Naruto.” Shikamaru raises a hand.

“I’m sure,” She nods her head. “Plus I think they’re eager for the shrines to finally be done too.”

Okaa-san’s expression goes tight and unamused, like it always does when they interact with her without it being an emergency, or Mayu asking permission first.

It’s not quite fair because Mayu suspects they can’t really help it, and it’s not really anything too direct, just flashes of emotion that are a little too intense to be her own.

She’s just glad they’re excited about the shrines too.

Then Shikamaru says, almost too casually, “The guns really spooked you earlier, huh?”

She can’t help it. She flinches.

Otou-san lays a hand over one of Okaa-san’s on her shoulder. “Ah, that...we were just discussing it with Mayu. We’re sorry for any worry her behavior caused, but...well...”

“But what?” Nara-san asks, one eyebrow raised.

Otou-san looks down, face twisted as if contemplating a difficult memory. “We don’t...enjoy talking about the journey from our homeland to Konohagakure. The...trials...we all had to weather. We’re just thankful we all made it here in one piece.”

Okaa-san nods and returns Otou-san’s doting smile, pretending to discreetly dab away tears with the sleeves of her kimono.

Shikamaru’s eyes widen slightly and he shifts, scratching his cheek and looking away.

It’s all she can do to not gape at the scene.

Are they—are they insinuating that her reaction to those things stems from their escape from Iron to hide her reincarnation? To the Jounin Squad Leader of Konoha and his son, no less?

She gives silent thanks to Franky and Robin.

She has the best parents in this world. The best.

“So the fact that the manufacturer of these weapons is based in Yukigakure comes as no surprise to you?” Nara-san says.

Otou-san jolts behind her.

Then after a moment, he sags, scrubbing one hand over his face. “You know, it really doesn’t. Does Yamanaka-san know?”

“He knows.” Nara-san nods, seemingly disinterested. He does a much better job of faking it compared to Shikamaru.

She glances back and forth between them, but there’s nothing on either man’s face that gives away any meaning to these non-sequiturs.

At least Shikamaru’s calculating look isn’t directed at her anymore.

Instead, he squints at Naruto. “Why are you wearing a towel?”

“Uh.” Naruto says, eyes darting to her.

Usopp help.

“We...were deconstructing a pillow fort! In my room.” She lies.

“A pillow what?” Shikamaru asks, eyes...oddly bright.

“A pillow fort! It’s where you take a whole load of pillows and blankets and towels and stuff and you create a fort using chairs and tables, or a chair and your bed if you have a raised one.” She explains.

Shikamaru nods, like this is only logical, though his expression has gotten even more weirdly intense for some reason. “Is that so? What do you do once you’ve built it?”

She shrugs. “It depends. You can just hang out in it and tell stories? Or nap?”

A slow, almost vicious smile spreads across Shikamaru’s face. He turns it upwards towards his father, who’s gone a worrying shade of grey and is staring at her like she’s pronounced a curse on his clan.

“Why.” Nara-san says, tone despairing. “Why would you tell him something like that exists?”

She shuffles so she’s partially hidden behind Otou-san. “...Sorry.”

Nara-san sighs, tugging gently on Shikamaru’s ponytail. “C’mon you. Let’s get going before you get any more ideas.”

“Actually, Nara-san, I have a quick question.” Okaa-san steps forward. “Would it—would it be acceptable for me to write to my relatives in Water Country? Perhaps inviting one or two of them over?”

She blinks up at her mother. She knows she has relatives in Water, but this is the first she’s heard about potentially meeting them.

Nara-san cocks his head to the side. “Writing a letter isn’t a crime. Inviting them here, to this village, for a visit...that’s more dicey.”

Okaa-san nods, chewing on her lower lip. “I suspected as much. Is that the same for all of Fire Country, or...? Ideally, we wouldn’t want to travel very far from Konoha.”

“Ideally.” Nara-san sighs again. “There are some villages nearby that might suit your needs. For now, I’d just put in a request for mail delivery at the mission desk. They can help you with any questions you have from there.”

“Thank you very much, Nara-san.” Okaa-san bows at the waist. “I hope you and Shikamaru-kun have a pleasant afternoon.”

“You too.” Nara-san bobs his head and takes Shikamaru by the shoulder. “C'mon, say goodbye.”

“See ya.” Shikamaru says, inclining his head like his father before the pair of them begin to walk away.

“See you tomorrow, Shika!” Naruto calls.

“Remember to wear clothes you don’t mind getting paint on!” She yells after him.

Shikamaru raises a hand in acknowledgement, before turning back to say something to his father.

Otou-san lets out a heavy sigh once the door is closed. “Right. Lee, could you bring the coats down with you?”

Lee obligingly comes down the stairs with both coats in his arms. “Are your relatives coming to stay, Chie-oba-san?”

“Maybe not to stay.” Okaa-san says. “But hopefully my brother Ikei and cousin Mei will get to meet you all.”

“All? You mean me, an’ Lee an’ Gai-sensei get to come with?” Naruto pipes up as he finishes setting down the towel, a huge grin spreading across his face.

Okaa-san beams and gathers the two of them into a hug. “Of course. I can’t let them leave without introducing them to three of my four favorite boys, can I?”

Lee’s eyes are shining and Naruto’s grinning and giggling. Otou-san leans over Okaa-san’s shoulder, pouting playfully. “Then what am I?”

“You’re the fourth favorite, of course.” Okaa-san teases, planting a kiss on Otou-san’s cheek.

Her mother turns and shoots her a small smile. “I also thought we could ask them it they’d met anyone who behaves...well, like you do. We’re a large merchant family spread all over, so it’s not unlikely that one of them has met someone in your circumstances without knowing it.”

“It’s not a bad idea, considering there’s likely one in Yukigakure.” Otou-san says glumly.

[britishassistant]

When I Took You In (1)

(Snake Summoner Mayu AU, because I have no control over my brain.)

It is bitterly cold in the mountains.

Ikuchi should not be here. She should be nesting down in a warm cave, belly fat and full, sleeping til the spring.

But the summoner has commanded she undertake this mission. It is a task beneath the summoner’s dignity, but the client is willing to pay good coin for its completion.

Enter the samurai nest. Find the hatchling of the client’s kin. Kill it.

She had been selected for her pale scales, her small size, her venom.

The summoner had remarked these made her perfect for infiltrating the snowy mountains the nest was hidden in with a cruel smile.

Manda is all too willing to swallow even small snakes like her who refuse or question the summoner’s commands.

She does not wish to be eaten yet.

So she slithers through another snowdrift, desperately praying to the Sage that she won’t freeze before she even arrives.

She stopped being able to see a while ago.

Her tongue feels like it will snap clean off if she tastes the icy air too frequently.

Only the faintest sensation of vibrations keeps her from curling in on herself to preserve whatever smidgeon of warmth she has left.

Only that makes her push her frozen muscles to keep going, heading towards rather than away as her instincts feebly hiss.

Where there are vibrations, there are humans.

Where there are humans, there is heat.

She will not freeze if there is heat.

She will not die on this Sage-forsaken mountain. She will not.

She forces herself to crawl forwards.

Ikuchi is so so cold.

She stiffly twines herself up and around something not-alive, slithering cautiously over new terrain with tiny bumps in it.

There is no snow anymore, thank the Sage, but it is still so so cold.

She cannot even taste anything anymore.

Her head bumps into something else. She noses it carefully.

Not-alive. Safe to climb.

She sluggishly heaves herself up the not-alive thing.

There are faint vibrations coming from above her. She needs to get to the vibrations. She’ll die if she can’t get to them.

If she could just heave herself over the edge of this not-alive thing—

Heat.

Lovely, warm, delicious heat.

She twines eagerly around the source, burrowing her head under where it is hottest, letting out a hiss of contentment as the cold burns out of her blood.

Aaaah.

The heat source rises and falls rhythmically, a gentle thud-thud-thud vibration filling her senses.

She shuts her eyes and lets herself drift in the warmth.

She is jostled awake when the heat source lets out a snuffly noise and wriggles slightly before settling.

As the heat source has saved her from dying an ignoble death via cold, she graciously decides not to bite it to stop it from moving.

Instead she retracts her head from the warmest spot to get a good feel for what exactly her new warmth generator is.

Her tongue flickers out over soft, faintly downy skin, over small features that scrunch up at the inspection before smoothing back out in sleep.

It’s a human hatchling. A very young one at that, barely a few days out of the egg at her best guess. Or was it weeks for humans? Or maybe months?

Humans are strange, Ikuchi reflects.

They’re so vulnerable for so long early in life, it’s a miracle that any of them even survive to adulthood.

That’s probably why the adult humans that are running around are so hardy. The summoner is proof enough of that.

Though other adult humans calling for the deaths of hatchlings, like the client, probably don’t help survival rates much.

Wait.

The client.

The mission.

Ikuchi pokes her head over the edge of the hatchling’s resting place and tastes the air.

A bigger human, also asleep.

Stuffy cloth.

Tatami mats.

Sharp metal. Lots and lots of sharp metal.

She retreats back down and noses over the hatchling, searching its cloth coverings until she finds what she was hoping she wouldn’t.

A stylized bird with wings raised, its beak piercing its own breast to draw blood.

The symbol of the client and his kin. The kin whose hatchling she’s supposed to kill.

Well.

Hm.

She settles her head back down in the warmest spot, burrowing under where the hatchling’s head meets its body and tries to think.

It’s...regrettable that the hatchling is what saved her from an icy death. But she has a job to do. A mission to complete.

It’s not like she particularly wants to do it. No, no, if she had it her way, she’d gladly bite the summoner and the client for good measure. Teach them for sending her to die in the cold for worthless bits of round metal.

But she has to complete the mission. Manda will eat her for failing the summoner otherwise.

All it will take is one tiny little bite. The hatchling will only suffer for a few moments.

...Okay, more like several minutes. It’s not like it’s her fault the venom will take longer because the hatchling is so big. She’s not a constrictor!

She flicks her tongue out irritably.

One bite.

Just one bite is all it would take.

Then she could be back in the caves with her brothers and sisters and never have to think about warm hatchlings and their weak, pathetic, pitiful death throes ever again.

The hatchling above her makes a little cooing noise and shifts above her, covering more of her coils in warmth as it squirms.

It even considerately takes some of its weight off of where she was beginning to feel a bit squashed.

She finds it distinctly annoying that this tiny human she’s supposed to kill has done more for her than her own summoner.

At this rate, she’d rather throw her lot in with it instead of continuing to—

Wait.

She pokes her head up again, considering the hatchling.

...Below average chakra reserves. But those should increase as it grows, right?

And she could help guide its growth.

Make it a much better summoner than her current one, or even his student.

Perhaps most importantly, she knows the Great Snake Sage will not let Manda eat her if she is contracted to another summoner.

He had thrown a tantrum when the summoner’s student had turned on him, but the Sage had not let him eat those snakes contracted to the student. She will be safe from his wrath.

In the caves at least. If they meet on the field of battle, she’ll be fair game.

But even one safe haven from Manda is better than none.

The scroll is heavy and difficult to unravel for a snake her size.

Still, she gets it open and props it up against the wall of the hatchling’s resting place.

After ensuring that the right segment is where she needs it to be, she twists around to look at the tiny human,

The hatchling looks back at her.

Its dark grey eyes do not focus on her, moving with the restless blindness of the very young.

“I am Ikuchi of Ryuichi Cave.” She hisses softly. “By your blood on this contract, we will become bonded. Do you accept?”

The hatchling gurgles.

Close enough.

She carefully pricks the hatchling’s finger with her lower fangs.

It wouldn’t do to poison her summoner.

Not yet anyway.

The hatchling whines, wiggling weakly as if that would make the pain stop. Blood beads on the appendage, bright red and hot.

She coils her tail around the tiny, soft wrist, and guides it to drag against the blank space on the parchment.

A rush of chakra.

A sensation not unlike a successful shed, useless dead scales sloughing away for gleaming new ones to take their place.

Ikuchi hisses in pleasure.

Ah. Her summoner is crying.

Squalling really, red-faced and snotty-nosed, thoroughly miserable.

The bleeding on its hand hasn’t stopped. It looks like it might have gotten worse, actually.

Ikuchi racks her brain for what little she knows about human physiology and healing.

Did the bastard summoner say it was saliva or excrement that slowed bleeding?

A shadow falls over the resting place.

She coils back on the chest of her summoner, ready to strike at the intruder. Did the client already send another assassin, despite paying the bastard summoner? Was betrayal planned from the beginning?

The adult human above them has its teeth bared in threat, eyes furious yet frightened.

“Get the hell away from my daughter.” It snarls, drawing a short blade from its midsection.

What?

Oh.

It’s trying to defend its hatchling.

Ikuchi reluctantly slithers off of her summoner’s chest and does her best to look small and unassuming.

The human scoops up her summoner in a flash, one hand cradling its head while the other bares the blade, ready to strike at any moment. It’s an instinct she approves of, even if it is completely pointless in this particular instance.

She curls up in the warm spot her summoner left behind, and announces, “I intend no permanent harm to the hatchling. It is contracted to me, and in my best interests to protect it.”

The human’s face creases in confusion, before its eyes land on the contract scroll.

Color drains from its face.

Huh. Ikuchi hadn’t known humans other than the bastard summoner could look like that. Maybe it was indicative of an emotion the bastard summoner felt all the time.

“Jirou!” The adult human’s shout is nearing a scream, eyes never leaving Ikuchi for a moment. “Jirou, get in here right now!”

[britishassistant]

I'm rereading but I like one piece, and I just remembered that both of mayu's parents are crushing on gai sensei oml

Thank you for the ask, dear anon!

They are crushing on him SO HARD, you don't even KNOW

The crush hasn't lessened as Lee, Mayu and Naruto have grown older. If anything, it’s increased in intensity as he’s basically become a co-parent to the pair of them, and so it gets easier for Jirou and Chie to daydream about him just staying forever instead of leaving in the evenings.

The three of them living together and raising Mayu, Lee and Naruto together and perhaps addding to the family in the future— that’s Jirou and Chie’s ultimate dream.

[britishassistant]

But I Like One Piece (16)

Surprisingly, Lee wraps his head around the idea of reincarnation from another world the easiest.

“It’s like when children at the Orphanage are adopted.” He explains blithely. “The parents who take them away give them new names, so you can’t ask to visit or see how Shinpachi is doing anymore, but the person who was known as Shinpachi still exists. He just has a new life with a new name somewhere far away.”

There’s a moment of contemplative and slightly horrified silence.

“Huh.” She says. “I-I guess it is kinda like that. I am Mayu, I just...remember being someone else before that. Somewhere very, very different.”

“Mayu—” Her mother pinches the bridge of her nose. “How-how do you know that this—this other world even exists?”

Well, she’d known they’d need proof to believe her, one way or another. Hopefully this will be complex enough that it should suffice.

She takes a deep breath.

«It’s the eye of the tiger, it’s the will of the fight, risin’ up to the challenge of our rival. And the last known survivor stalks his prey in the night, and he’s watching us all with the eeeeeyyyyyyeee—of the tiger.»

Naruto grins. “Hey, it’s the singy thing!”

Lee gives a little round of applause. “You have a very nice voice, Mayu-chan!”

She tries not to blush and fails miserably.

Gai-sensei nods. “A most youthful tune, Mayu-chan. But do the sounds have any meaning?”

“Wait just a moment.”

All eyes turn to her father, whose head is hanging down, hair bracketing his eyes.

“Those sounds...aren’t they...”

She feels a drop of sweat slide down the back of her neck. Otou-san is the second son of a samurai clan after all; it’s no surprise that he can recognize a foreign language just by hear—

“They’re the noises you used to make when you were a little baby!!” Her father yells, pointing a dramatic finger at her.

“NO!!” She yells back, cheeks aflame. “Well, actually, yes, they kinda were, but they weren’t just baby noises!!”

Okaa-san gasps, pressing a hand to her cheek. “Dear, I can’t believe I couldn’t remember! You were so sweet, Mayu-chan, always going ‘aa dun uda’sta oo’.”

“That’s because I was trying to say «I don’t understand you»!” She groans, covering her eyes. “I didn’t understand this language back then! I just wanted to know what was going on!”

“Hey, hey, Mayu’s Tou-san,” Naruto says, eyes sparkling with mischief. “What was Mayu’s first word?”

Her father exhales and strokes his chin while looking off into the distance with a nostalgic twinkle in his eye. “Well, let’s see. She would’ve been about twenty months old or so—”

“IS NOW REALLY THE TIME FOR THIS STORY?!” She cuts in desperately. “I’m trying to prove the existence of another world by showing that I know a language that no one in this world has ever heard of and is far too insane for anyone with a brain to have made up!”

“Insane?” Says Lee, tilting his head in confusion.

“English is the pirate of languages.” She mutters darkly. “It goes around and beats up other languages and steals their words.”

“Is there anything about your past life that’s not related to pirates?!” Okaa-san asks, exasperation evident in her tone.

“I like pirates.” She says, hurt.

Her mother shoots her an unamused look. “Ketsugi Mayu...”

She holds up her hands in surrender. “Pirates were kinda mythical in my past life by the time I was alive. There were historical ones, but people romanticized them a lot. Like ninja.”

“What?! How dare they, that’s really rude, believe it!” Naruto fumes, crossing his arms. “...Kaa-san, what’s rom-an-ti-sized mean anyway?”

“It means they make up stories about them to make them seem...nicer.” Okaa-san explains. “Usually by pretending they aren’t as violent as they really are.”

“Oh.” Naruto thinks about this. “That’s dumb. Ninja are already cool, they don’t need to be nice.”

“Pirates are cooler.” She says.

“They are not—”

“Don’t start.” Her mother says in her scary week-long-ban-from-cooking voice.

“Yes Okaa-san.” They chorus.

“But wait.” Lee’s now frowning. “If the only ninja are historical, then how did countries in your past life defend themselves?”

“With armies of soldiers. Normal ones.” She replies. “ Though those might be replaced by flying robot drones by now. There used to be ninja in Japan—may still be even if only in name—but there wasn’t anything like chakra in my past life, so we developed technologically to fight each other instead. Now the world’s kinda in a stalemate peace because we’ve developed so far that the planet will become unable to support human life if we ever go all out.”

Lee stares at her, then drops his head, fists trembling in his lap.

Gai-sensei presses a hand to his shoulder. “Lee.”

She grows alarmed as tears begin to drip off of her friend’s face. Oh shit, she hadn’t meant to insult his dream. “Hey, Lee—”

“Mayu-chan.” His voice is surprisingly steady. “Did you mean everything you said? You aren’t making anything up?”

She hesitates but shakes her head, mouth twisting in consternation. “Yes. I did mean it. Lee, I’m sorry—”

Suddenly his arms shoot up in the air, fists still clenched. When he raises his head, his tears are sliding around a wide and dazzling grin.

“There’s a world of ninja without chakra.” He whispers, tone awed. “They don’t need chakra to become strong. To become ninja.”

Gai-sensei beams back and ruffles Lee’s hair into a haystack. “Of course! A youthful spirit and the willingness to work hard are what truly make a ninja!”

“And our Lee has that in spades.” Okaa-san says fondly, smoothing some of the now-haystack back into place. “You’ll be a fine ninja, I’m sure of it.”

Lee sniffs noisily. “Gai-sensei, Chie-oba-san...!”

“Yeah!” Naruto throws his arm over Lee’s shoulders. “An’ then you an’ me an’ Mayu-chan are gonna be on a kickass ninja team together, believe it!”

“I’m gonna be a pirate.” She interjects staunchly.

Naruto pouts at her for a moment, before he brightens again. “Fine then! Sakura-chan can be our third teammate, and Mayu’ll be the pirate mascot!”

“Sakura-chan?” Lee cries eagerly.

“Pirate mascot?!” She echoes indignantly.

Naruto sticks his tongue out at her triumphantly while her father and Gai-sensei turn away to muffle what sounds suspiciously like laughter.

She folds her arms and scowls at the stair in front of her while her mother pats her head consolingly.

Otou-san manages to get his chuckles under control enough to place a hand upon her and Lee’s shoulders. “We’ll always be very proud of you all, whether you’re a pirate mascot—” He fails to hide his snickering under her disapproving gaze, “—or a ninja. We just want you to be happy.”

“Jirou-oji-san!” Lee sniffs, eyes refilling with tears.

It takes another five minutes to get Lee and Gai-sensei to stop crying and hugging everyone in reach.

This is only exacerbated by the fact that her parents lose all rational sense and begin blushing and stuttering helplessly when they’re caught in Gai-sensei’s embrace.

Once everyone’s calmed down a bit, Naruto turns to her again. “So if this world was a story in your past life, does that mean you know the future, or any super cool jutsus?”

“No.” She says. “Because I never read that comic. I only ever read One Piece and argued with idiots who tried to say that that comic was better, which it obviously wasn’t.”

Her mother rolls her eyes at her as she lies, “I don’t even remember what that series was called, or any of the characters from it.”

Naruto narrows his eyes at her. “Then how’d you know you were here?” He fires back.

She stares at him as placidly as possible. He’s her best friend in this world—practically her brother in all but name. Lee is too, and Gai-sensei may as well be a third parent by this point.

She’s afraid of dying again, but she thinks that if it were for this family right here, her family, she’d face it with the kind of smile that only a D could muster.

She refuses to sentence Naruto to a miserable life of second-guessing and unearned guilt over things that he couldn’t possibly control.

Not this time.

Usopp, Nami and Robin give her the conviction to make this lie believable.

“The Hokage Monument.” She tells them smoothly. “It was in the background of almost every panel that idiots who liked the comic would try to show me. I didn’t remember where I recognized it from until I was about four years old though.”

Naruto doesn’t quite look convinced at first, but his expression becomes more accepting as he mulls it over.

Lee, bless him, just nods along trustingly.

Okaa-san tilts her head and stares at her with unnerving scrutiny.

Otou-san touches her mother’s arm, an eyebrow raised in concern, only for his wife to shake her head almost absent-mindedly.

Gai-sensei’s nose twitches.

She holds her breath.

His face breaks out into his usual beam. “I see! So the Will of Fire blazes strongly even in other worlds!”

She exhales, sending a mental thank you to the Rational Trio. “Yes. Any other questions?”

“Did you have a family in your past life?” Lee asks.

She flinches.

“Ah.” Lee’s smile is sad and understanding. “It’s okay if you didn’t—”

“I know it is.” She cuts in, grin feeling stilted. “It’s just—they weren’t anything to special. My Dad was a businessman and pretty strict. My Mum was a housewife and very spiritual. Kinda boring overall.”

Lee nods again, though he looks a little confused.

Okaa-san and Otou-san look...hurt.

She wants to hug them, but there’s a little part of her that whispers that doing so would be a betrayal. She forces herself to turn to a nicer topic.

“I did have a little brother, Harp.” She smiles to herself. “He’s a good kid, you guys would’ve loved him. He’s wizard at doing presentations and performances and things like that, really makes it easy to understand and believe what he’s saying, you know? He’s gonna be a famous actor when he grows up, or a politician, some really great speaker once—”

She freezes. “Shit.”

“Language!” Okaa-san says, but she barely hears her, knuckles white as her nails dig into her knees.

“I didn’t make a will.” She rasps. “I never made—and now they’ll get it all. They’ll take everything, and he’ll still be trapped.”

“Who will take everything?” Otou-san says, steely-eyed and serious. “Mayu, was someone you were related to threatening your family?”

She shakes her head. “Not—not threatening, exactly. S’just.” She makes an abortive movement with her hands. “Living with Mum and Dad was...not good. For me or Harp. They never got on with each other, and both of them were disappointed in us in their own way—anyway.”

“No, why were they disappointed?” Okaa-san says, eyes blazing. “I want to know what they thought was wrong with my little girl.”

“Okaa-san—” She tries to say, flattery and embarrassment warring inside her.

“Nothing’s wrong with Mayu-chan!” Lee interrupts, little chest puffed out. “She’s fine the way she is!”

“Lee—”

“Except that she does curry too spicy.” Naruto cuts in. “And argues with the Academy teachers a lot. But that’s not disappointing, believe it!”

She’s torn between the overwhelming desire to kick him in the shins and give him a great big hug.

Gai-sensei gives what, for him, counts as a discrete cough. “While I’m sure we can agree that Mayu-chan is one of the farthest things from disappointing there is, I believe you were in the process of explaining your dilemma?”

“Right.” She tries to will her cheeks to stop burning.

“Well, I had some money saved up so I could try to get Harp out—hire a good lawyer and see if, while Mum and Dad’s divorce was finalized, I could win custody so he’d get to live with me.”

“What’s divorce?” Lee asks.

“It’s when two people who are married decide they don’t want to be married anymore.” She explains. “So they go to a court of law to make it so they officially aren’t, and each person gets part of what they both owned.”

Naruto gasps, like the idea is somehow shocking to him. To be fair to him, the adults look equally scandalized, so she guesses that’s not exactly a common practice here. “You can do that?! But why? I thought married people were supposed to love each other forever.”

“Usually they do.” She says wearily. “But sometimes people fall out of love, or one person is hurt by the other, or both misunderstand the person they got married to. Dad thought a woman like my Mum would be very business-focused like he wanted. Mum thought a man like my Dad would be very spiritually enlightened like she wanted.”

Naruto looks confused but considering, so she moves on.

“Anyway, I had a lot of money saved up, but because I died without leaving anything that said how I wanted it to be used, Mum and Dad will take all of it, or at least argue over who should get the most of it in the divorce.” She clenches her fists. “And Harp’ll never see a penny.”

“Mayu-chan.” Naruto’s voice wavers slightly. “Did you not love your parents?”

For an awful moment, she’s struck by the paralyzing urge to say “No”.

Then the horror and guilt settle in her gut again like undercooked food and make her feel like she’s going to choke on bile.

“Wh—of course I loved them!” She sputters indignantly. “They were my Mum and Dad. You’ve got to love your Mum and Dad.”

“It’s okay if you didn’t!” Naruto holds up his hands placatingly. “They just don’t sound very nice! You said that they said you were a disappointment! And you didn’t want your little brother to be with them!”

He and Lee are staring at her wide-eyed, as if waiting for her to snap at them again. The same way Naruto and Kiba look around Sakura these days.

She takes a deep breath and tries to make her voice softer, gentler. “I’m sorry for yelling. It’s just, sometimes, you can love someone and know when they’re not very good at something, or in a position that they and other people aren’t happy they’re in. I did love my Mum and Dad, but they are the last people in that world I’d trust with a kid. It wasn’t their fault, but I thought if I could get Harp out, let him grow up happy—”

She shakes her head, worrying the scar on her lower lip.

She’d promised him she’d get him out.

She’d promised.

“How old were you?” Her father asks, voice low. “When...?”

She can’t bring herself to look at him, but he sounds weary down to his very bones.

“I was twenty years old.” She says to the stair in front of her.

“Is that.” Her mother hesitates for a moment. “Is that an old age to die at? Among the people of that world.”

She makes a face. “Nah. I’d been an adult for two years in the eyes of the law, but most people in my past life could expect to live until their lates eighties or nineties before dying of natural causes.”

She hears Gai-sensei whisper “late eighties or nineties” to himself in a tone filled with something like wonder.

It’s that wonder which spurs her to look up and say, “In fact, if you manage to live to your hundredth birthday, the Queen sends you a card wishing you a happy birthday and congratulating you. I had a friend whose great grandma got one.”

Only Gai-sensei looks as amazed by this information as she’d hoped they’d all be. Lee’s trying to muster up the same enthusiasm as their teacher, but he can’t quite. Naruto looks more confused than anything.

Otou-san and Okaa-san are just staring at her like they don’t recognize her.

It hurts too much to hold their gaze.

“How’d you die?” Naruto asks. “Were you fighting a bad guy?”

She rubs the back of her neck. “Not really. A man broke into the flat. I grabbed a knife. He freaked out and his gun went off. He said it was an accident.”

She hisses the last word with all the venom it deserves.

She doesn’t understand anymore why the One Piece anime tried to censor Belle-mere’s death by changing it from a headshot to a bullet to the chest.

A headshot is quick and painless, at least.

She’s so caught up in her own memories that she doesn’t hear her father’s question. “Pardon?”

“What was your name?” Otou-san’s voice is soft and understanding, even though his eyes are pitying.

“...The girl who died was called Tamara Kaur. Her friends called her Tammy or Tim-Tam for short.” She says, a mournful grin on her face. “My name is Ketsugi Mayu. I’ll be in your care, if you’ll have me.”

The quiet that follows this statement, half joke and half plea, is enough to make whatever hopes she was still desperately clinging to crumble like a sandcastle in the face of the tide.

There aren’t many more questions after that.

Aside from the pointed conversation that began with “so if the person Naruto mentioned really was a comic character, then who was the home invader?” and ended with her exasperated mother asking “What do you mean, you ‘accidentally created divinity’?”

She winces. “Kinda that? I just, I was praying to them for normal stuff, and then that day I prayed for help with cutting the lamb and ended up with an entire meal I didn’t remember cooking.”

Okaa-san stares at her for a long moment before burying her head in her hands. She makes a noise Mayu thinks might be a sob.

Otou-san pats her back awkwardly and shoots her what she thinks is meant to be a reassuring smile. “Your Kaa-san’s fine. She just...needs a moment.”

“So it was Sanji?” Naruto whispers to her.

She nods rapidly.

Naruto’s face splits into a grin so wide his eyes almost close. “Awesome.”

“I know.” She whispers back, hardly able to keep from smiling herself.

Okaa-san sends her to turn off all the taps and hang her clothes back up upstairs.

She supposes she has wasted enough water for one day.

She blinks in the mid-afternoon sun when she opens the door to her bedroom, ignoring the masks that are all but pressed against the shut window more out of habit at this point.

She feels too drained to even feel alarmed by their proximity to her home. Talking about her Mum and Dad always did that to her, even when she was in the same world as them.

A phantom hunger pang pierces her stomach.

She shudders at the memory. Oh Luffy, she hopes Harp got out quickly, that he didn’t have to grow up on meals that were either pigswill or denied to him entirely.

He’d be...what, eighteen, nineteen by now?

Reading about Sanji and the adventures of the Straw Hats used to help her get through those punishments.

She sends a prayer to them now that Harp didn’t have to learn how to do that himself.

Otou-san, Okaa-san, and Gai-sensei are discussing something in low, serious voices when she comes back downstairs.

They quiet down for a bit when she steps between Lee and Naruto to get to the kitchen.

When she returns to the hallway, Gai-sensei pats her shoulder with a little too much force, shooting her a megawatt beam and a thumbs up.

“Do not worry, Jirou-san, Chie-san! I am certain that there will be no cause for concern for yourselves or Mayu-chan!”

Otou-san heaves a sigh. “We have every faith in you. It’s just—”

Okaa-san lays a hand on Gai-sensei’s arm. “Please, Gai.”

He solemnly takes her hand in one of his own, reaching out to grab her father’s arm with the other. “Everything will be as it always is. I swear it to you.”

The adults’ eyes seem to glisten as they stare at each other.

She glances at Naruto and Lee, eyebrow raised.

Naruto gives a quizzical shrug. Lee’s almost vibrating as he stares at their parents, eyes wide.

She hates to break up the moment, but there’s an elephant in the room that needs addressing.

She coughs a little. “Um, Okaa-sama, Otou-sama?”

Her parents look over at her, shoulders stiffening.

She worries the scar on her lower lip. “I, ah, just wanted to say, that if you need some time to-to process what I’ve told you, and you don’t want me a-around for it, I can get out of the house, go somewhere else for as long as you need me to—”

Otou-san and Okaa-san stare at her, expressions of pure horror on their faces.

Shit, has she really overstepped by that much? “O-or if you don’t want me to come back, I could always try to find o-other living arrangements for myself—”

“YOU FOOL!”

The slap to the back of her head isn’t nearly as painful as most of the blows she’s weathered during training, but the sheer surprise of the attack has her clutching it and looking up in bewilderment.

Gai-sensei looks madder than she’s ever seen him.

“...Or I could leave the village entirely?” She meekly suggests, unsure of what to say to appease her teacher’s anger.

“And when did anyone ever say they wanted you to leave?!” Gai-sensei booms.

What?

She blinks in confusion. “But I’m not who you thought I was, I have—”

“Are you Ketsugi Mayu?” Her mother asks, voice drier than an over-baked cake.

“Yes—”

“And do you enjoying cooking and feeding people?” Okaa-san walks towards her and leans down.

“Well, yes, but—”

“And you have an obsession with pirates that leads you to act without thinking a lot?” Her mother reaches out and grabs her cheeks.

“It’s not an obsession—” She feebly tries to argue through pursed lips.

“Then you are my daughter.” Okaa-san says. “And you are going to stay right here where I can see you, and we are going to lay down some ground rules about contacting strange deities, do you hear me young lady?!”

She’s so alarmed by the sight of angry tears gathering in her mother’s eyes that she just nods her head as best as she can in this grip.

Okaa-san lets out a little sob and then she’s being enveloped in a crushing hug by both of her parents.

Otou-san murmurs, “Our family stays together, damn what anyone may think. Even if we have enemies on all sides, the Ketsugi clan will weather any blows. Didn’t we already tell you that?”

Then she feels Lee and Naruto’s little arms squeezing her from behind, and the gentle weight that means Gai-sensei has joined the hug too.

“Please don’t go Mayu.” Naruto says, sounding small and scared. “Please.”

She can’t help it when she starts bawling like a little kid again.

[britishassistant]

The Parentals.

A sketch of Ketsugi Chie and Ketsugi Jirou from But I Like One Piece.

Chie was the eldest daughter of a promient shipping merchant family in Kiri and currently works as a server in a teahouse. Jirou was the second son of the Ketsugi clan of Iron, and is now a low level accountant. Their marriage was arranged, but they managed to bond and fall in love over their mutual interests in swordplay and martial arts.

They have acquired three children through various means, and are both secretly in love with the sensei they think is their eldest’s long-lost father, much to their youngest’s chagrin.

But will he ever return their feelings??

Ketsugi Mayu refused to answer when reached for comment.

[britishassistant]

Inktober and OCtober Day 10: Family

A picture of Mayu’s family at this point in time.

Naruto has a loving family supporting him, which is as good a birthday present as any!

[britishassistant]

The Villainous Paranoiac Goes To Jail and Ninja Afterlife

Two innocent children get sent to Night Raven College

A set of scenarios about three of my ocs unwittingly trading places for two days, non-canon to any of my AUs

Swap 1:

Yuu—> Konohagakure

Yuu wakes up with a tantō to the throat.

Chie: Tell me where my daughter is and I’ll make your death quick

Yuu promptly freaks the fuck out

Through a combination of panicked yelling and tears the Prefect manages to convey to the Ketsugi that if there was a kidnapping, Yuu is both uninvolved and as much as of a victim as their precious daughter

Gai confirms that the strange teenager not only has no chakra, but clearly has little to no combat training despite his(?) athleticism, meaning Mayu-chan could easily overpower an assailant of this size, especially one this undernourished!

Yuu tries not to be offended and to avoid staring at Gai and Lee’s eyebrows they’re so big

Promptly shrieks when Kami!Sanji materializes to confirm that the Paranoiac had nothing to do with Mayu’s disappearance as far as the other gods can tell

Yuu becomes convinced that this place is the afterlife

The sad part is that Chie and Jirou can’t actually say much to the contrary, because??? Their daughter remembers dying before she came here?? Also there are active deities just floating around so.

Actually tears up at the homemade meals the Ketsugi provide

Before being sick as a dog later because food infused with chakra? Does not agree with a person without a chakra regulatory system

Surprisingly patient with Lee and any questions he has the purity of Jack and Deuce is strong in this one

Bit more long-suffering towards Naruto and his rendition of Wonderwall. Sunshine child too bright, introvert Yuu can’t handle it

Keeps writing down everything everyone says

This makes ANBU and ROOT very twitchy

The Paranoiac is quietly slated for “interview” at T&I the next day

Yuu crashes on the Ketsugi couch none the wiser

Mayu—> Nanba

Mayu wakes up to confused screaming and profanity.

It’s Hani.

It’s very rare for screaming not to be because of Hani

All he knows is one child was in this bed last night, and now’s there’s a different one dressed like it came straight out of Ninja Kamikaze???

Mayu for her part is both very alarmed to be waking up in a prison cell with two strange men and very glad she has her bokken with her

Kiji comes in to find his beautiful inmates being menaced by a twelve year old with a wooden sword

The twelve year old is winning

Once Mayu has ascertained that they aren’t enemy ninja and she’s somehow in her old world (?) she becomes much more cooperative with the guards

She’s very worried about how she’s going to get back to her family in Konoha

Also wondering if she should try to contact her former little brother Harp (who knows if she’ll ever get the chance again?)

These worries are not assuaged when the Warden informs her that there’s no records proving “Tamara Kaur” ever existed

For lack of any relations who they can contact to take the child off their hands, and because they have no idea how she successfully infiltrated the most secure prison in the world and replaced one of the inmates, the Warden decides to keep Mayu in Nanba’s holding cells until further notice

Guess who finds the samurai child while breaking out?

Nico, Uno, and Rock are amazed at the existence of a real live Japanese Samurai! With a katana and everything!!

Jyugo just asks straight out if Mayu’s an actor too

Mayu is very bemused by everything, but they seem friendly! The one with the mohawk likes food too!

Plus the blonde one is British! Just like she used to be!

Uno is very confused about how a twelve year old somehow lost her citizenship

Break Mayu out to get food together

They get caught the moment they set foot in the cafeteria and scolded very harshly

Mayu has trouble sleeping in a cell cot that night

Nana—> Night Raven College

Nana’s first instinct on waking up in a strange bed next to a monster is to assume he’s been kidnapped and attempt to subdue his captors

Which means Grim wakes up to an attempted smothering

The ghosts hear muffled screaming and rush in only to get salt and iron filings to the face. Nana actually has them all on the run when Crowley bursts in

Instantly becomes a confused and lost child in front of the headmaster and dorm heads

Only Grim and the ghosts know the truth, and their complaints are overlooked due to them “scaring the poor boy”

No one has any idea what to do with a thirteen year old magicless kid. It was hard enough with Yuu, and the Prefect was at least sixteen and could attend classes!

Nana adapts quickly to the idea of being in this new world— he’s just sad he couldn’t say goodbye to Kiji, Hani-senpai and Trois-senpai before leaving Nanba

Immediately resolves to leave NRC at the earliest possible convenience when he gets a good look at the Theory Wall— he can’t even read Japanese but that amount of crazy that it signifies always spells trouble

Is confused by all the pictures of Disney villains on the Theory Wall, but decides it’s not worth the trouble to ask about

Actually uses the beauty products Vil left for Yuu correctly

Gets semi-adopted into Pomefiore after asking Vil where the high quality products came from

Grim and the ghosts aren’t sorry to see the little brat go

Vil carts him around to test his potential in the performance arts

Epel tries to be a good senpai for the kid, and tells him he doesn’t have to just go along with Vil

Nana appreciates the effort, but does find this kind of thing more fun than being on his own he’s homesick for his cell

Rook enjoys seeing the child freeze up minutely whenever he asks about the prison attire and the large “7” tattoo on the back of the boy’s head

Nana likes Rook less and less with every pointed question the vice dorm leader makes

Can’t sleep in the big cushy Pomefiore bed and so curls up on the floor with a pillow instead

Swap 2:

Yuu—> Nanba

What why is Yuu in jail now

The prefect was supposed to be back home/in Ramshackle Dorm, why is Yuu in jail now—

Yuu is stressed and overdue for Grim snuggles

Paranoiac is also not thrilled about being stuck in Building Three— it’s like Pomefiore on steroids

At least Epel and Vil don’t steal and obsess over the underwear of their “fans”

Rook...the jury’s still out. But probably not. Probably

Maybe

Hopefully

Much less cooperative than Mayu.

Questions about the Prefect’s family name are met with a stony glare. “It’s Yuu. Just Yuu. How many times do I have to repeat myself?”

Can’t answer any questions about Mayu or her current whereabouts despite admitting to knowing of the girl, but does posit a theory about the three of them transmigrating and swapping places based on the information gained in Konoha

Gets offended and even less cooperative when the interrogating guard calls the hypothesis “crazy”

Not intimidated by Hajime or the other guards in the slightest. Yuu’s classmates are far more likely to inflict lasting bodily harm and it’s hard for even the worst human glare to measure up to Floyd or Leona on a bad day

The Warden scares the Prefect though

Doesn’t stop Yuu from requesting a lawyer or other legal counsel before submitting to further questioning

The Paranoiac is a Japanese citizen and has made a point to know what the applicable legal rights for this situation are

Yuu ends up in the holding cells

Guess who hasn’t learned their lesson while breaking out?

Uno takes one look at Yuu

“Ah Jyugo, this one has your energy”

Nico loudly asks if the Prefect is from an isekai and died and reincarnated in Nanba??! Do they die over and over again and revive to beat bad guys?? Do they have an amazing cheat skill?? Are they a spider?? Can they shoot a beam??

Yuu just thinks. Ah. So this is what would happen if Kalim and Idia somehow had a kid

Don’t break the Prefect out, but Jyugo comes back later and deposits something through the bars

“This is Kuu. He’s a guard, but he’s also really good when you’re lonely. You look like you could use the company”

Yuu blinks and holds out a hand for the black cat with a guard cap to sniff

Crashing in a cell cot is uncomfortable, but hey, at least there’s a cat to pet

Mayu—> Night Raven College

Why is there a tanuki in her bed?

Grim isn’t waking up by being murdered but being poked with a stick by another smol child isn’t much better

Mayu is Concerned by the Theory Wall

“Is— is the person who lives here okay?”

Grim: Hell if I know

Mayu’s even more Concerned when she opens the fridge and sees it’s bare

>:|

Sanji wouldn’t let these people go hungry, so she’s not going to either!

Searches until she finds the Prefect’s grocery money and marches with Grim to Mr. S’s Mystery Shop

Everyone is confused by the presence of a new preteen on campus after the last one vanished from Pomefiore during the night

Mayu’s used to haggling with market people who would rather see her starve than even sell her the worst of their produce, so she’s easily able to barter Sam down to a third of the price for the groceries she wants to buy

Sam’s more amused by the guts of this tiny samurai devil than anything

Mayu and Grim drag all the food back by themselves with a few students following from a distance out of curiosity

They all soon enter Ramshackle once the smells of cooking begin to emerge from the dorm

Silver first followed because the child has a sword and is now helping to knead dough

Epel arrived because he had questions about where Nana had gone, but Mayu is genuinely clueless so now he’s peeling apples for lack of anything better to do

Mayu soon has several “helpers” for making bread and other easy-to-preserve and mix-and-match bulk meals to fill the Ramshackle fridge, though she soon has to send Grim out for more ingredients when her helpers begin getting hungry

The night ends with a feast that can rival the quality of food served at Kalim’s parties

Mayu finds one of Yuu’s blank notebooks and writes down some easy recipes the Prefect can use for all the food now in the fridge and pantry, with emphasis on fish based dishes

The ghosts and Grim enjoy having Mayu much more than Nana

Mayu still has trouble sleeping in the big Ramshackle bed that night

Nana—> Konohagakure

Well this isn’t Nanba or Night Raven College

Welp. Time to go then.

Nana is halfway out of Konoha before anyone notices

Gai does notice because a strange kid in a prison jumpsuit swiftly scurrying to the exit sticks out like a sore thumb in the early morning

ANBU’s search for the vanished Yuu is the only reason Nana isn’t stopped by them

Nana tries to run

Nothing can outrun the Beautiful Green Beast of Konoha

Nana is now more than slightly traumatized

Gets carted off to early morning training with Naruto and Lee

Is initially more interested in plotting yet another escape attempt until Lee mentions Yuu and NRC—then he’s curious about what information he can glean about the two other members of this triad

Especially interested in the concept of reincarnating into another world or being brought there by an outside force rather than moving between worlds freely

Eats an almost alarming amount for his size at breakfast that morning and leaves nothing on his plate

Unfailingly well-mannered to his hosts

Offers more information about Mayu’s past world in payment for eating the Ketsugi’s food and waking up in their home after they refuse to let him pay them back using manual labor

Asks them to tell him what they already know so he can work out what knowledge gaps to fill in

Nana: ...Why are you singing Wonderwall?

Takes it upon himself to teach Lee and Naruto more English so they can at least form basic sentences

It’s an uphill battle because predicates and participles are hard

A supportive and encouraging if slightly inept teacher

Soon realizes Chie somehow knows all the swearwords and glares at him for trying to teach them to the boys

Also falls ill from eating chakra-infested food

Gets twitchier as the day goes on and asks to leave the village several times, insisting he can’t impose on their hospitality any longer

Only agrees to sleep on the couch once Jirou subtly implies that at least people will notice and go looking if he goes missing from their house compared to if he disappeared from a tree miles away from Konoha

Can’t sleep on the couch due to jumping at noises during the night, ends up curling up on the floor next to it

[britishassistant]

But I Like One Piece (1)

She was twenty when she died.

She’d just graduated with a double first in Literature and Preservation from Exeter. She’d been accepted into a prestigious master’s school in London.

She’d moved into a basement flat with her best friend and a couple of his friends. She’d been glad to escape her childhood house, where her mum and dad traded vicious words over who was getting how much in the divorce.

She’d promised her brother she’d get him out too, once she had a stable place that the courts would approve of. She had been due to interview for a job at a big bookstore chain next week.

And then someone had broken in while her flatmates were out. She shouldn’t have grabbed the knife. That just made the armed man freak out.

The last thing she remembered was a bang, and the blubbered words “I didn’t mean to!”

She wakes up as a baby.

She waves her arms around and cries as an unfamiliar lady with brown hair and brown eyes bends down over her crib, hushing her with more urgency than is really warranted.

Rain hammers down outside and thunder rumbles directly overhead.

Then a man with blue hair and grey eyes arrives. He stinks of copper, and that makes her wail harder.

The man and woman confer, words too fast for her to understand.

Then the man gently presses a cloth which smells chemical and awful to her face, hushing and looking at her with sad eyes while the woman strokes her head.

She struggles, but eventually swirling red circles dance before her eyes and she succumbs to sleep.

She grows, and learns that she is not anywhere remotely like her home anymore.

She looks in mirrors and sees grey eyes like the man’s, brown hair like the woman’s, hair too straight, eyes too angular, skin too pale.

Her new name is Ketsugi Mayu. The woman’s name is Ketsugi Chie, the man’s is Ketsugi Jirou.

They live in a little house, on the outskirts of a village that’s nothing like the village she previously grew up in. It’s too big, too bustling, with large compounds with symbols decorating the exteriors and brightly painted buildings, flat roofs alternating with asian-style pagodas.

Faces carved into a mountainside like a bastardization of Mount Rushmore. Huge trees everywhere, though she couldn’t tell you the type. She never was any good at biology.

Her “parents” escaped to this village from the rainy place before. Both of them work, but the woman takes her with her, or comes back first.

She gets the feeling their neighbors don’t like them very much.

Despite the electricity for lights and plumbing and cooking, there are not electronic communication devices, not like she knew them. Photography, but no video or animation.

Calculators and computers are unheard of, abacus and notebooks in their place.

The food is good though. Fresh and flavorsome, with meals that are usually served in what she mentally called “plate-2-bowls” style, a bowl of rice, a bowl of soup, and a meat or vegetable dish in the center.

The woman she is supposed to call her “mother” scolded her for ages the first time she dumped the rice out of the bowl onto the plate and tried to eat it that way.

The man she is supposed to call her “father” just laughed and said how lucky they were to have a daughter who would eat everything given to her.

And she did. Even if she doesn’t like the flavors, she eats it all and leaves no scraps.

One Piece taught her that those who waste food are scum, after all. She’ll never learn how the series ended now, so she does her best to live up to the ideals of her favorite characters in its place.

She probably should’ve seen it coming in the end.

The story she was read at bedtime was called “The Tale of the Utterly Gutsy Shinobi”. There were constantly people dressed in dark clothes jumping across the roofs.

There were stalls in the market that sold throwing knives and stars and japanese swords.

But she didn’t realize exactly what world she’d been reincarnated into until she sees a little boy around her age, with blonde hair and blue eyes and three familiar lines like whisker marks across each cheek.

He’s racing away from a severe woman dripping with orange paint, cackling even as she screams, “GET BACK HERE NARUTO, YOU LITTLE DEMON!!”

She’s four, so she promptly bursts into tears and remains in a strop for the rest of the week.

Naruto doesn’t have food.

It’s dumb and doesn’t involve her and she shouldn’t care because she never even read this series because it was stupid and sexist and dumb and pirates will always be better than ninjas no matter what stupid morons on the internet who have no interpersonal relationships say—

But Naruto doesn’t have food.

She saw the food vendors at the market slap away his money, yell at him for trying to steal from them, chase him away from their stalls with rotten produce.

And he goes away empty handed.

Every. Damn. Time.

Sanji wouldn’t let him go empty handed.

Fuck.

She buys three lunch boxes and an “easy cook recipes” book from a lady who coos at her.

She buys extra rice and ingredients so that she doesn’t use up her “family’s” food.

She decides on a sweeter, more protein-focused meal for breakfast, and presses rashers of bacon and scrambled eggs between slices of crusty bread, filling the compartments with orange slices and strawberries and a plain yogurt.

For lunch she tries and fails to recreate Ketsugi Chie’s perfectly triangular rice balls filled with salmon, but consoles herself that the cucumber and seaweed salad turned out okay, To make up for it, she sticks a packet of gummies in the dessert bit.

She shadowed him the evening before, and so wakes up obscenely early, tugging on the clothes she wore yesterday.

She deposits the food outside his door, checks the sticky notes with “BREAKFAST” and “LUNCH” on them are secure.

Then she raps on the door with all the power her little fists can muster and bolts.

She’s about halfway down the street when she hears the overexcited whoops and fights to keep a smile off her face.

That night, when she comes bearing a thermos filled with miso soup and a box with rice, baked salmon with mushrooms, and dango, the other two are stacked neatly outside the door, licked clean.

She deposits dinner, grabs the other boxes, knocks again, and bolts so she can make curfew.

Here’s her routine.

She goes to bed and falls asleep instantly after preparing that boy’s breakfast and lunch.

She wakes up early and runs through the village while the streets are still asleep and deposits his food, collecting his dinner box and the feedback sheet, knocks and goes, avoiding any traps he’s set up to try and catch her on his endless quest for her identity.

They’re harmless, more intended to snare rather than hurt, and she’s gotten good at dodging.

She gets home in time for her “parents” to wake up, washes up the box while they shower, and goes upstairs to get ready for the day.

Ketsugi Jirou makes her run through katas before breakfast. Sometimes he lets her practice with the wooden sword he carries, and laughs when she falls over, kissing her bruises.

Ketsugi Chie serves breakfast and corrects her table manners and posture. After Jirou has kissed them both and left, she is given lessons in calligraphy and etiquette.

Sometimes Ketsugi Chie takes her along to her job at a tearoom, and she has to observe as her “mother” elegantly serves the patrons and makes polite conversation.

Sometimes she’s left to clean the house and study the books on the history of her family. There are many, but more are missing, references they have no source for.

At lunchtime, she reviews the feedback sheet, making notes of what worked and what didn’t.

She’s supposed to play outside after lunch, so she runs laps. Once Ketsugi Chie’s shift is over, the woman either collects her from home or goes with her straight to the market for food.

She begins making Naruto’s portion the moment groceries are put away, serves it hot and runs it over. She picks up the empty lunch boxes and paper, deposits the dinner, knocks, and runs away.

She eats dinner with her “mother” and “father”. Jirou quizzes her on what she’s learned.

After dinner she washes up the dishes and makes tomorrow’s lunch and breakfast while her parents tell her a bedtime story.

Then she cleans up after herself, and goes to bed, falling asleep instantly.

It’d be nice if this could last.

So of course, the next time she deposits breakfast and lunch, an adult dressed in black with a white mask tackles her to the ground.

She barely avoids spilling the food, clutching it to her chest with one arm as the other is twisted viciously behind her back.

She screams, tries to kick out, but her legs are too little, she can’t hurt the bastard—

The lunchboxes creak ominously under her.

“Who sent you?!” The adult hisses—there’s no way that’s not a man, not with that baritone— “Drop the henge and tell me, or I’ll—”

Something twangs.

A mass of rope drops onto them, followed by chalk dust.

“HAH!” Comes a much higher-pitched yell. “I told you I’d get ‘em, believe it, I told—wait, what the heck?! Jiji, mask-guy’s hurtin’ my friend!”

The click of a cane and the sound of an old man’s voice. “Hound-san.”

The pressure on her arm lessens and the adult gets up, though he doesn’t let go of her. She wheezes, feeling her eyes watering now she can breathe properly.

She hiccups once. Twice. Bursts into floods of noisy tears.

A blurry figure of orange comes into her view. “Hey, hey don’t cry, don’t cry! It’s okay, mask-guy won’t hurt you anymore, Jiji won’t let him, believe it! Yo-you’re the one bringin’ me the food, right? It tastes really good, believe it! M-my name’s Naruto, wh-what’s y-yours? Plea-please don’t—”

The blur of orange begins crying as well.

“Oh dear.” The old man sighs.

The old man takes them to the tower in the center of the village, drawing curious stares at the sight of two wailing children, one bleached white by chalk dust, following him.

The tower is scary. It reminds her of government buildings, with lots of people in green or grey jackets or white masks moving from one place to the next like fire ants, ready to turn and bite intruders to their nest at a moment’s notice.

She doesn’t work out who the queen ant is until the old man sits behind the big desk in the room at the top of the tower, and another mask brings her and Naruto water at his gesture.

“Now, let’s get to the bottom of this, shall we?” Says the old man, smiling genteelly.

A shiver goes down her spine.

The questions should be easy. What’s her name, how old is she, where does she live, who are her parents, where do they work, does she have any siblings, what are her hobbies.

But her tongue is stuck to the top of her mouth and when she tries to speak, she just makes a pathetic little croaking sound, no matter how much water she swallows.

The man who hurt her gets more and more tense with every failed answer.

The old man just looks sadder, like she’s failing a test, like he’s going to let the mask hurt her again—

Naruto asks, “Can you make ramen?”

She swallows. “I—I’ve never had it. I don’t know the ingredients. Is, is it like miso?”

“It’s WAY better than miso, believe it!” Naruto yells. “It’s got noodles and green onions and fish cakes and pork and tofu and chicken and fish and seaweed, and sometimes the broth can taste like miso but better and sometimes it can be spicy and Ichiraku’s is the best, and I’ll take you there so you can have some, believe it!”

She frowns. “How can it have pork and chicken and fish? That doesn’t work. Those meats go with different flavors—like chicken katsu and pork katsu are served with different toppings.”

He blows a raspberry. “They’re not all in the same bowl at one time! There’s different types.”

Her mind ticks over the possibilities. “...So a dashi broth for miso could work? What type of flour are the noodles?”

He shrugs. “I’unno. There’s different types?”

“Of course there are!” And she tells him about wheat vs buckwheat vs rye vs rice flour, and how flour mixed with water can serve as food in a pinch but isn’t sustainable for him because he’s malnourished—

“I’m not mal-no-ished, believe it!” Naruto protests.

She scoffs. “Don’t be stupid. Look, try to touch your thumb and pointer finger around your wrist.”

He looks at her warily, but does as she says easily. There’s enough space between his hand and his wrist that she could wriggle her little finger in there, if she tried.

“See?” She says, holding up her own wrist where her thumb can’t quite reach her finger. “You’re too skinny, because you don’t eat enough. You need to bulk up, and eat to get your vitamins, or you’ll grow up weak and feeble.”

The boy pouts. “S’not my fault the stupid jerkwads in the market won’t sell to me.” He grumbles.

“No, it isn’t.” She replies. “But they sell to me. And those who let people go hungry are scum.”

There’s a wounded noise. She looks up at the forgotten adults, tensing again.

The masked man has vanished. The old man just looks tired, but also...happy?

The old man walks her and Naruto home, and she glimpses many more white masks in the trees. The idea that any one could hurt her at any time has her trembling, fists clenched.

“What’s your name, anyway?” Naruto asks, clutching his lunchboxes close.

“Mayu.” She replies after a moment’s hesitation. “Ketsugi Mayu. I’m five and ten months.”

“I’m Uzumaki Naruto and I’m six, believe it!” He cheers. “Imma be the Hokage one day and take over from Jiji, believe it!”

She frowns up at the old man. “What’s a hokage?”

He laughs. “It’s the ninja entrusted with the safety of the village and all those within. The Hokage specifically is the leader of this Village Hidden in the Leaves, Konoha.”

She looks around.

“This place is way too big to be a village, no matter how you look at it.”

Her parents burst out the door just as they arrive at her house, her father clutching his bokken, her mother still in nightclothes.

They blanch when they see her, the woman reaching out with an abortive hand.

The Hokage bows to them. “Ketsugi-san.” He says. “May I congratulate you on raising such a fine daughter?”

Ketsugi Jirou bows hesitantly back, eyes not leaving her. He has to press a hand to Chie’s shoulder to get her to do the same. “You honor us, Hokage-sama.”

The Hokage smiles and gently pushes her. She totters forward and is swiftly captured in a crushing hug, both adults muttering “Mayu, Mayu.” Like she’ll disappear if they let go.

Her eyes begin watering again, because she’s escaped. She’s safe. For now.

“Otou-sama.” She whimpers. “Okaa-sama.”

She mentally apologizes to her parents in her past life, and the brother she left behind. In their memory, her new family will remain “Otou” and “Okaa”, never “Mummy” and “Daddy”.

“OI, MAYU-CHAN!!”

She half-turns in the hug, sees Naruto and the Hokage some distance away.

“COME GET RAMEN WITH ME TOMORROW!! ICHIRAKU'S IS THE BEST, BELIEVE IT!!” He yells, with far too much volume.

She sniffles. There’s something wrong with Naruto. He lives alone and borderline starves, but the ruler of this village visits him enough that he calls the man “jiji”. People in the street call him “demon” and “monster” openly, but the masked man attacked her for approaching him.

The smart thing to do would be turn him down politely. Thank you, but no thank you. She’s his food provider, she’s not under any obligation to be his friend.

So, of course, she yells back, “EAT YOUR FOOD AND I'LL BE THERE!”

He pumps his fist and whoops, cheering loudly as the Hokage smiles and guides him away.

Mayu Ketsugi and her parents tense as the accusing, silent stares pierce them.

The neighbors never liked them much anyway.

[britishassistant]

But I Like One Piece (9)

It takes her a long time to get Okaa-sama back inside.

There’s masks watching from the trees as she closes the door, and she can spot more through all the windows, glimpses of white against dark leaves.

She closes the door and locks it.

Then she draws the blinds on all of the windows, as though that will act as a barrier somehow.

Her mother is still weeping softly downstairs.

She slides down a wall, trying to choke back sobs herself. She can’t do this. Not now. She needs to think, to plan, not—not cry like a helpless little eight year old.

She is mentally twenty, she needs to act like it.

She pinches her arms, hard, until the tears in her eyes are from the pain instead.

Think, Ketsugi. How can you convince the authorities of Otou-sama’s innocence without getting yourself and Okaa-sama locked up as well?

The easiest way would be to catch the real culprit.

But she has no idea what actually happened yet, let alone who could’ve done it. If she tries to start snooping around the crime scene for clues, she’ll probably be caught and imprisoned for suspicious behavior. And then Okaa-sama would be all alone, so that’s out.

She could go on strike.

Not a hunger one, but she could sit outside the Hokage’s office with a cardboard sign? Naruto, Lee, Chouji and Sakura would sit with her, she’s sure. Maybe even all of their lunchtime group.

And then the masks will take them, like they’d taken Naruto and Lee, all of her friends vanishing in swirls of leaves, never to be seen again—

She has to bite down on her knee, teeth digging into the flesh awkwardly, to keep herself from screaming.

She briefly entertains a fantasy of going around and beating masks up until they tell her where Otou-sama is, and then staging a dramatic rescue complete with a dynamic entry and exit.

No, she decides, swallowing the metallic taste in her mouth. She’s nowhere near strong enough for that, no matter how much she’s improved under Gai-sensei’s and her father’s training. The masks would just hurt her again.

So if she can’t find the true culprit, or peacefully protest his imprisonment, or rescue Otou-sama by force, what can she do?

She gnaws at her lower lip.

...There really isn’t anything, is there?

Everything she can think of would end up with them imprisoned as well, or worse. Konoha’s not like her last life, with laws and foundations and charities against illegal incarceration. They don’t even have a police force anymore, since all the Uchiha were the police and all the Uchiha are dead.

Things like bail or lawyers or civil rights are probably about as substantial as a pipe dream here.

That must be why Okaa-sama’s crying so much.

Because she knows that the people who took Otou-sama have all the power here, and anything they try to do to get him back could mean he’s forced to stay captive for longer instead, to punish them for disobedience.

All they can do is keep their heads down and try not to show any aggression or resentment and hope obedience translates into loyalty and innocence in the eyes of the right people.

They’re just immigrants after all. They have no power in a village that doesn’t want them here.

She troops downstairs, knee stinging with the movement.

She takes the portion on the plate out of the oven, and switches the oven off. She gently puts it onto a smaller plate and covers it in foil, waiting for it to cool before she puts it into the fridge. She washes off the big plate and puts it back in the cupboard where it lives.

She does not consider giving the meal to someone else or eating it herself. Otou-sama is coming back. It’ll...just take him a little while, that’s all.

She goes back upstairs and brushes her teeth and puts on her little nightie.

By the time she comes back down, the food’s cooled enough to safely be put in the fridge.

She lingers in the doorway of the living room. “Okaa-sama?”

Her mother lifts her head from her arms. Her eyes are swollen and red, and her thick brown hair is disheveled. “Hm?”

“Can I sleep with you in the big bed tonight?” She asks, ears burning, painfully aware that she hasn’t done so since she was two and would wake up screaming from dreams about her old family and best friend and robbers with itchy trigger fingers.

“Oh sweetheart.” Her mother murmurs. “Of course. Just let Okaa-san get ready for bed, alright?”

“Okay.” She says. She goes back upstairs.

She sits and rubs spit into the little teethmarks on her knee, so the sluggishly bleeding punctures will scab over and she won’t get blood on her parents’ sheets.

They’ve stopped bleeding and she’s crawled under the covers and dozing by the time Okaa-sama finally comes upstairs and begins washing up for bed.

Her mother hugs her close in bed, her hair dampening under the onslaught of silent weeping.

Hey Franky, Usopp, Sanji and Luffy. She prays silently. I know this is a lot to ask, but please, please, please. Let Otou-sama come home safe. Me and Okaa-sama can’t do anything, so please. Help us by doing what we can’t.

“Psst!”

She rolls over in bed, eyes feeling too heavy to open.

“Psst! Little girl! What was it...Ketsugi Mayu-san!”

She wrinkles her nose, blinking and rubbing the sleep out of one eye.

There’s a turtle on her pillow. It’s little, and green with yellow swirls on it’s shell.

But still. Turtle.

“Y’r a t’rtle.” She slurs.

The turtle looks very indignant (can turtles do that?) and straightens its head. “I.” It whispers, in a very self-important tone. “Am a tortoise.”

“Y’r a t’rt’se.” She corrects agreeably. Then pauses. “Didj’ou jus’ talk?”

“Yes I did. Honestly girl, haven’t you ever seen a summons before?” The tortoise complains.

“Whassa summons?” She asks, rubbing her other eye.

The tortoise mutters something that sounds a little unkind about civilian families. “You can call this one Jimichi. I have come from Gai-sama, bearing a message for Ketsugi Mayu-san.”

Okaa-sama shifts restlessly behind her.

She looks behind her at her mother, and then back to the tortoise. “May I pick you up, Jimichi-san?”

Jimichi-san looks like he’s about to protest when Okaa-sama lets out a soft little sob in her sleep. “Ooh—alright then, just this once, mind!”

She carries the tortoise into her bedroom and sets him down on her bed, kneeling in front of him.

“Are you hungry, Jimichi-san? Would you like some water or anything?”

The tortoise looks considering, before shaking his little wrinkly head. “No, thank you. I will be fine, so long as I complete my mission.”

She sits back on her heels to listen, trying to ignore the little pinpricks of pain in her knee.

“Gai-sama wishes to tell you he will be out of the village for the next week or so—he is currently in pursuit of the thieves who broke into Hokage Tower earlier today. He conveys his regards to Ketsugi Jirou and Chie, and expects you to keep up your most youthful training with Uzumaki Naruto-kun and Rock Lee-kun.” The tortoise took a breath.

“Are Naruto and Lee alright, Jimichi-san?” She bursts out, hardly able to control herself.

The tortoise shoots her a withering look. “How should I know? Yūcho and Katsu were sent to talk to them, not me.”

“Oh. I’m sorry. I-I just haven’t seen them since the mask took them away a-aft-after—” She swallows, and makes herself continue even if her voice sounds small. “—After he said my father was being held in Interrogation.”

There’s a quiet inhale.

“Has your father been doing anything that warrants this suspicion?” Jimichi-san asks.

She frowns. “Of course not. If he were going to do it, Otou-sama would’ve talked it over Okaa-sama and come up with a plan to get her and me and Naruto out if he got caught—he loves her too much not to. And both of them are too much in love with Gai-sensei to hurt the village he loves like this.”

“What.” Jimichi-san squeaks.

There’s a soft snap from the tree in next door’s garden. Maybe a stray cat?

“I know.” She whispers, barely stifling giggles. “It’s so embarrassing—at breakfast t-they always pine over hi-his e-eve-every w-wo—”

Ah. She’s crying. She rubs furiously at her face, but it’s not stopping, why won’t it stop—

“Oh—blow.” Jimichi-san sighs. “...if I find out what happened to Uzumaki Naruto and Rock Lee, will you stop making this racket?”

She sniffs miserably. “‘M sorry.”

He gives a disdainful huff before retracting into his shell.

There’s two puffs of smoke, and then there’s a yellow tortoise with blue swirls on its shell and a purple one with red swirls on her bed.

“Jimi, dude, what gives?” The yellow one says.

“I am not your ‘dude’, Yūcho!” Jimichi-san hisses. “My name is Jimichi! And keep your voice down, you numbskull!”

“Awright, awright, don’t get’cha panties in a twist, jeez.” Yūcho-san says without lowering his voice very much at all. “‘Sup little dude?”

“Hello.” She replies, biting her lower lip to keep from laughing. Don’t think about Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, don’t think about Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, don’t—

“U-um.” The purple one whispers. “Why are we here, Jimichi-san? Was there a problem with delivering your message?”

“Wh-of course there wasn’t!” Jimichi-san blusters. “My message was delivered with all due promptness and clarity, wasn’t it, Ketsugi-san?”

“Yes Jimichi-san.” She nods. “I’m Ketsugi Mayu. It’s nice to meet you, Yūcho-san, Katsu-san.”

The purple one—Katsu-san— startles a little. “Eh, nice to meet you too. Um.”

“Oh fuck.” Yūcho-san stares at her. “You’re the one who’s dad is de—”

Jimichi-san somehow rockets himself across her duvet to slam into Yūcho-san and send him spinning like a top. “Don’t you dare use those words in front of a little girl, you idiot!!”

She gapes as Yūcho-san gradually slows and begins groaning complaints, not quite sure what to do or how to stop it if this somehow turns into a tortoise-brawl on top of her bed.

Don’t think about Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

Jimichi-san stands. “Honestly. Ketsugi-san asked me to call you here because she was worried about Uzumaki Naruto-kun and Rock Lee-kun, and here you are, wasting her time. Now, did you two deliver your messages successfully to your recipients or didn’t you?”

“Of course I did, dude!” Yūcho-san protests. “Blondie was in his apartment and got the message loud and clear!”

“Um, I also was able to locate Lee-san at the Orphanage.” Kastu-san volunteers softly. “He was deep in thought, but was not actively distressed.”

She sighs. Well, she’ll take what she can get. “Thank you for your help, Yūcho-san, Katsu-san, Jimichi-san.” She bows at the waist.

“Ah, i-it’s no problem.” Katsu-san stutters, while Yūcho-san cheers, “Hey, happy to help!”

Jimichi-san lets out a little huff. “Well, you just keep your head down and your nose clean, alright? You’ll be no good to anyone if you’re in trouble too. Now run along back to bed, go on.”

She stands and bows to them again. The three tortoises all vanish in puffs of smoke.

It feels awful, trying to get up at her normal time the next morning.

She rubs the sleep from her swollen eyes, and tucks the blanket back in around her mother. Okaa-sama hadn’t even stirred during the night. Little furrows still crease her brow in sleep.

She kisses the crown of her mother’s head, and leaves the house as quietly as she can.

She keeps her eyes on her shoes and doesn’t look up at where she can feel the masks watching her.

Naruto hasn’t set up any traps this morning. She knocks on his door, the sound jarring in the quiet of dawn.

His eyes are bloodshot and red, making the blue look even bluer.

“I wan’ ‘Tou-san.” He mumbles.

She reaches out and hugs him tight, pretending she doesn’t feel his shoulders shaking as she strokes his back.

“I know.” She murmurs. “I want him too.”

Even Lee is subdued compared to his usual exuberance.

He’s trying his best. He takes both of them by the shoulders and says, “Don’t worry! Gai-sensei will definitely find the culprit soon and free your father from his most unyouthful imprisonment!”

Naruto’s face crumples even more at that for some reason, so she does her best to smile back at Lee for the both of them. “Yeah. Thanks, Lee.”

Since Lee’s the oldest and the most like Gai-sensei in temperament, it’s unanimously decided that he will be the one to lead the group’s exercises.

He’s not as hard a task-master as Gai-sensei, dropping the number of laps they have to do around Konoha by five every time Naruto yawns. They end up doing only one hundred of the original one hundred and fifty.

They’re running through the basic kata for what will eventually be a Dynamic Entry once their leg muscles are built up enough when it hits her.

She stops dead.

Unfortunately, her momentum doesn’t, so she wavers on her toes before her leg buckles and she crashes to the ground.

“Mayu-chan!”

“I’m okay!” She unfolds herself and sits up, looking into two pairs of worried eyes. “I’m fine—just remembered something and got distracted is all.”

“What is it?” Lee asks as Naruto plops down beside her.

She opens her mouth, and closes it. She looks away, ears and neck burning with embarrassment.

“I—” Her voice cracks, and she has to swallow. “I...may have forgotten to make us lunch last night?”

Lee decides that the best thing to do is run another lap of Konoha before going back to her house to make lunch together.

She readily agrees. She doesn’t think she could stand it if she had to work in a silent kitchen. Not today.

There are more people up and about now.

It may just be paranoia, but she could swear that many of them were whispering and pointing at her.

She keeps her eyes down and does her best to ignore this as she ignores the masks.

The house is still dark when she lets them in. Well, Okaa-sama does need her sleep.

They decide to make something quick and easy for lunch.

They have plenty of bacon, and some spring greens left over from yesterday’s miso soup. So while she parboils and shocks the vegetables, Lee stirs the bacon around in the pan, and Naruto puts what may be a little too much honey mustard on slices of bread.

Okaa-sama comes down sometime during when she’s patting the spring greens dry.

Her mother won’t stop touching, whether it’s ruffling Lee’s hair, giving her kisses on the cheek, or hugging Naruto.

Naruto latches onto Okaa-sama like an octopus with his arms and legs. Her mother promptly heaves him up to sit on her hip, showing no sign of strain at carrying around an eight year old boy, and begins to prepare breakfast around them.

By the time the sandwiches are assembled and put into the lunchboxes with sides of cherry tomatoes and pudding cups for dessert, there’s barely enough time to run through the basic strikes her father was teaching her.

Lee’s enthusiasm about her training is...well-intentioned if ill-advised.

“No, I’m not going to hit you with the bokken! It’ll really hurt!” She argues.

“Do not worry, Mayu-chan! I am sure that I will be able to block adequately so I am not injured!” Lee says cheerfully, giving her a thumbs up.

“I’m telling you, even blocking this will give you bruises!!” She yells back, exasperated. “Okaa-sama! Tell him!”

Okaa-sama smiles at them as Naruto giggles weakly, hitching him higher. “I think Mayu-chan is right about this, Lee-kun. Come on in both of you, breakfast is ready.”

The Academy is buzzing with rumors

Apparently what happened yesterday was a theft—though whether anything got taken or not or if the theft was combined with an attempt on the Hokage’s life is hotly debated.

The thief—or thieves’—target was apparently a scroll of some kind, which apparently contained some insanely strong, killer jutsu from the Nidaime’s time. Or the secret to eternal life. Or the Shodaime’s ultimate bloodline ability. Or all the money in Konoha’s treasury.

For some reason everyone pulls a face when one of the civilian kids volunteers the last option.

There’s also plenty of argument about who the culprits are. A lot of people think it was the Demolition Squad from Iwa, given the huge explosion. Others say it wasn’t flashy enough to be Iwa, that it had to be missing-nin from Suna. Still more say that there’s no way it’d be Suna, that the only people strong enough to get through Konoha’s defenses were the Seven Swordsmen of Kiri.

One or two say it might’ve been Uchiha Itachi, come back to test his strength against the Hokage, but glares from their lunchtime group quickly shut that up.

There’s a general consensus that it had to be an inside job though. That the culprits, whoever they were, needed somebody in Konoha to know where their prize was and how to get to it.

“But we saw that blonde guy yesterday.” Kiba insists. “It’s obvious that was one of the thieves!”

“That doesn’t discount the possibility of there being someone in Konoha who helped them.” Shikamaru drawls. “After all, how could an outsider who’s never lived here know anything?”

Something niggles in her brain, but she focuses on eating her sandwich.

Ino sighs. “Daddy’s had to do so much overtime at his work because of this stupid thing.”

She narrowly avoids flinching, and asks, “What does this have to do with your dad doing overtime at the flower shop?”

Theres’s a silence.

“What?” Ino says, confusion written all over her face.

She shrugs. She doesn’t think she said anything weird...

“Mayu.” Shikamaru says slowly. “What is it you think Ino’s family does?”

She takes another bite that tastes like cardboard and carefully thinks over her answer. “...Flower shop ninja?”

Ino snorts and Hinata begins giggling quietly, while Sakura stares at her. She shifts in her seat.

“Right.” Shikamaru says, squinting at her. “Okay. And Chouji’s family? Or Kiba’s.”

Oh, she knows these. “Chef ninja and dog ninja.” She replies confidently.

Chouji shrugs, nods, and bites into an onigiri while Kiba cheers, pulling Akamaru off his head for cuddles and doggy kisses.

“My family?” Sasuke cuts in, bags under his eyes. He looks like crap.

She meets his gaze head on. “Police ninja.” Then she puts the other half of her sandwich and her cherry tomatoes into his lunchbox.

He looks down at it, grunts, and bites into the sandwich. Then makes a face. “Too much mustard.”

“Blame Naruto.” She says, grinning at the boy in question’s mildly irritated “Hey!”

“Mine, Shino’s and Hinata’s families?” Shikamaru asks, head now cradled in his hands.

She frowns. “Insect ninja...” She points at Shino, who inclines his head, “I have no idea about Hinata...Sleepy ninja?”

Ino and Kiba promptly crack up. Even Chouji chuckles a bit.

Shikamaru’s head drops through his hands and thunks on the table. “How have you lived in Konoha your whole life and still know nothing?!”

“I know some things!” She argues, flushing in embarrassment. “It’s just—knowing what food you like is more important than where you come from, right?”

There’s a moment of silence as everyone stares at her.

Then Hinata goes red as Chouji hums next to her, a quiet, happy sound, and Shikamaru mutters “Troublesome,” under his breath as everyone focuses back on eating.