crybaby
the salesman (squid game) x female reader
summary: a young woman finds herself being cut off from her father’s earnings after an accident which pushes her into the hands of a certain man who takes a liking to her.
warnings: 18+, dark fic, noncon/dubcon, innocent!reader, naive!reader, brat reader, dark!salesman, yandere, age gap but reader is of age, obsession, stalking, injured reader, smut, d/s, ddlg-ish, daddy kink, virgin!reader, porn with little plot kind of, crybaby!reader, dacryphilia, manipultion?, breeding kink kind of, creampie, confusing narration, possible mistakes and typos
word count: 5.4k
a/n: endless thanks to @crappedoutlungs for never getting tired of proofreading my shit
main masterlist
She couldn't believe what was happening to her. Her father would take drastic measures to punish her for one simple mistake, such as canceling all of her credit cards?
It's not like she purposely crashed the new Mercedes. It was an accident, and instead of being concerned about her health, they decided to renounce her? She couldn't even walk in a straight line, and they're throwing her out?
“We’re not making you leave, sweetie. We’re simply closing all of your accounts until you realize how valuable all this is. You can’t just buy a car and then crash it after three days,” her father explains but it goes straight out her other ear.
She cries in pain as she rises from her bed, slapping her father's hand away as he tries to assist her.
"You're acting as if I purposely crashed it! It wasn't my fault at all, daddy! I'm in pain! Why can't you see that? My leg is completely messed up!" She bounces around, clinging to her father, hoping for his pity once more. In hopes that he'll reverse the freezing of her bank accounts.
"That's why you need to learn a lesson," her father says as he moves her and places her on the bed. As her father continues to chastise her, she only reacts with a huff.
"Seeing you in pain kills me, so I'm stopping you from making another mistake. I don't want to hear about another accident involving you. Your bank accounts will be frozen until you learn to behave like an adult and stop acting recklessly." His words were final, and even if she wanted to complain more, she couldn't, so she walked out of her room before her father could.
She hopped pathetically out of her room, ignoring the way her father called for her. She dashed towards the garage and asked David, the driver, to take her to her friend Dani's house.
David nods once before assisting her inside and driving away, only stopping because of traffic. David answers his phone's incessant ringing and visibly gulps as the caller yells something at him. He turns to face the young woman in the back and gives her an apologetic look.
“Your father wants me to take you back.”
Before the driver can say anything else, she jumps out of the car and waddles towards the metro station, silently laughing as she enjoys the driver's exhausted expression. She felt like a child who was being chased by her father.
She slowly comes to a stop as she recalls her father. She despises the thought of her father despising her, so she huffs angrily as she walks towards the... She had no idea where she was going. She couldn't ask Dani how to get to her location by train because she didn't have her phone with her.
Just her luck, she comes across a man, perhaps ten years or more her senior, dressed up in an expensive suit and carrying a briefcase. Maybe she can borrow his phone from him. Does she even know Dani's phone number by heart?
It doesn’t matter. He looks trustworthy enough.
She walks towards the man but comes to a halt when she notices him raising an eyebrow at her. Embarrassment starts creeping up her spine.
She takes a deep breath before continuing to approach the man and briefly introducing herself and asking if she could borrow his phone.
"I'm sorry, but I can't do that," the guy says as he bows in respect before turning his back on the girl, but is stopped by her hand on his forearm.
“Why not?” She almost whined, clearing her throat before repeating the question clearly. “Why not, mister?”
"Lending a stranger my valuables isn't really a good idea," he said with a smirk.
She visibly scoffs at his words, clearly offended.
“W-what?” Her eyes flutter as she struggles to believe what the man has said. Did she strike him as a thief? She couldn’t even look him in the eyes anymore. She felt humiliated.
She ignored whatever the man said and turned around, limping out of the metro and deciding to take the bus instead. Hopefully, Dani was home, so she could just rant to her about her terrible day.
“He thought I was a thief!” The young woman exclaimed, laughing when Dani laughed at her outburst.
“He must have been living under a rock if he hasn’t heard about you… You did mention that he was old so it's possible that he’s never heard of your dad’s business before. Maybe he’s a scammer and his get-up was just a trick,” Dani’s eyes widen as the young woman considers her friend’s theories.
"He isn't that old... I'm not sure what I'd do if I didn't have you, Dani!" The young woman jokingly cried before hugging her friend.
"Forget about your father. And don't even think about the salesman from the station. I'm sure your father will calm down by tomorrow. I'm sure he'll welcome you with open arms as soon as you get home," Dani smiles before turning off the lights and heading to bed.
The young woman sighs and pulls the blanket over her head, allowing sleep to consume her.
The young woman's plan did not go as planned the next day. Her father called Dani to talk to her and he all but screamed and berated her once more. He chastised her for being stubborn and extended the freezing of her bank accounts. She cried, but her father only hung up on her.
"What do you intend to do now?" Dani inquired.
"I'm going home and then I'm leaving," the young woman says firmly and with a frown.
"Are you sure you know where you're going?" Dani trailed her as she walked out of the house and into the distance.
"No, but I'll call you later. But first, could you tell me how to use the metro station?" With a sheepish grin, she inquired.
Dani laughed and nodded.
The young woman sits on a bench waiting for the train, determined to return home and prove to her father that she doesn't need him. She regretted staying at Dani's for the entire day because the nearly empty train station terrified her, and the darkness outside didn't help.
She was terrified when she heard footsteps approaching her, so she kept her head down, hoping that whatever or whoever it was would simply vanish.
However, a familiar warm voice engulfed her ears.
"Excuse me, may I take a seat?" When the salesman from yesterday pointed to the seat next to her, she only nodded, taking her gaze away from him and frowning to herself. Why sit next to her when there were plenty of empty benches nearby?
"Would you like to play a game?" The salesman inquired softly.
“No thank you,” The young lady immediately responded, frowning when she heard the man quietly chuckle.
“It’s a simple game. Ddakji. Ever heard of it?” The man continued to speak.
“I’m sorry but what happened to stranger danger?” The young lady inquired, her voice quiet despite her desire to scream at the man who had insulted her the day before. She did, however, become shy in his presence.
She could feel the man staring at her, but she didn't dare to return his gaze.
"Would you please look at me while I speak to you?" His voice became stern all of a sudden, and she found herself obeying him and looking at him with her eyes wide open.
The salesman chuckled before whispering something in her ear, causing her body to warm up.
“Good girl.”
The woman gulped and kept staring at the man who was now opening the briefcase between them.
“It’s simple. Each time you win, I’ll give you a hundred grand. If I win, you give me the same amount of money. Does that sound fair?” He opens the case to show her the money as well as two papers.
When she didn't respond, she felt his fingers on her chin, tilting it up so she could look him in the eyes before tilting his head in question.
“I-I…” She nods, thinking about how this will help her show her father that she doesn't need him.
“I want to hear it, little girl,” the man smirks at her when he feels her face becoming hotter under her touch and takes it away from her face.
"I'll play," she says, reflecting on how simple the game is.
The man hums happily before showing her two papers, one red and the other blue.
“Pick a color,” he says, smiling when the younger woman takes the blue one away from his grasp.
"You can go first," the man says as he throws his paper to the ground.
"No, no, no. You can go first." The woman kneels to place her paper on the ground before picking up the red paper and handing it to the man who was smiling down at her.
He nods before rising to his feet and slamming his paper on top of the blue one, successfully flipping it.
He smirks at the girl who was staring at the papers with wide eyes before looking back at him with a nod.
"My turn," she says as she picks up her paper and throws it at the red one, which barely grazed it.
When he notices the girl chewing on her thumbnail, the man's arrogant smile turns into a fake frown.
"Is there something wrong?" He asks, feigning concern for the girl, but still removes her hand from her mouth to prevent her from nibbling on her thumb before standing tall again.
“I-I don’t have a hundred grand right now…” she says under her breath.
"Wait, what was that?" He asks again, despite the fact that he heard her the first time. He simply enjoys watching the girl be nervous.
The girl repeats her words louder this time, her eyes slightly teary as she looks at the man.
“How about you use your body to pay?”
That causes the young woman's eyes to widen.
“Wha--”
She was interrupted when the salesman slapped her on the left cheek. She was stunned and emotional, clearly having never experienced anything like this from anyone else. No one, not even her strict father.
The salesman observed the young woman as she held her left cheek with both hands as her once slightly teary eyes began to produce more tears until she was full-on crying, minus the sobs that she tried hard to suppress.
The salesman's heart clenches as he gazes at the woman's lovely face, and his pants begin to tighten around the crotch area.
"How about another round?" He tries to smile at her, to cheer her up, but the way she shakes her head no, scared of him, breaks his heart but makes his cock harder at the same time.
"I-I don't want to play anymore," she says, dropping the blue paper on the ground and limping away from him, which he only now notices.
He calls for her but it didn’t make her stop.
“I know about your father freezing your accounts. I know about you more than you think I do. I know you’ve got nowhere to go,” he smiles when she finally stops but frowns when he sees her face filled with tears and anger as she turns around.
“Are y-you stalking me now?” Her voice wavers, making him feel even worse.
"Not at all, little girl. I…” He closes his briefcase before reaching for the card in his front pocket, but he comes to a halt halfway through. He couldn't let her participate in the game. She wouldn't last a second in that place. She's far too delicate. She must be protected.
He approaches her, placing a comforting hand on her shoulder before squatting to be at eye level with her.
“I can help you,” he smiles.
The woman, who was overly emotional and in pain, only stared at him with hopeful eyes, so he continued to speak.
“I’ll help you, my little crybaby. I’ll make sure that your father will regret pushing you away. Wouldn’t you like that?” He speaks softly, caressing her face and brushing the back of her head as she leans in closer to his embrace.
“But you slapped me…” She murmurs beneath him.
His chest rumbles as he chuckles, but he comes to a halt before gently rubbing her back. At the very least, he got her attention.
“It was a mistake, and I will never do anything to upset you like this again. I promise.” He speaks, but she doesn't respond, instead, she continues to bask in his embrace.
“I will help you. I will be here for you and we’ll make your father regret everything. Is that what you want?” He tries once more.
"Yeah," she finally nods against his chest, making him smile triumphantly.
He draws her in closer before taking a whiff of her hair.
She’s so frail. So delicate. So sensitive. So ethereal. She does not deserve to be in pain. She needs to be protected.
He’ll protect her.
He’ll take good care of her. Only him and no one else.
The salesman assisted the woman out of the train and onto his home with care. It took almost everything he had not to just carry her all the way home because he didn't like the way she kept limping. But he liked how she leaned into him for support. He liked the idea of her putting her trust in him.
It makes him wonder what else she will entrust him with.
As the salesman assisted her in becoming acquainted with his home, the woman gazed around in awe. It was almost as big as her house, if not bigger. She smiles slightly at the prospect of doing better without her father. Her father expected her to apologize and suffer despite the fact that she had done nothing wrong. She is not going to apologize for something she did not do. At least not on purpose.
The young lady was brimming with pride and the salesman was well aware of it. He can't decide whether he likes that aspect of her or if he wants to tame it. He already admired her nervousness towards him. It makes him wonder if she'll be his actual good girl.
While he admired the woman, she admired his house. He could sense her discomfort at not knowing what to do next, so he decided to put her out of her misery.
"I'll take you to the room, and then I'll make something for dinner," he says, earning a nod from the girl as she follows him down the long corridors.
After being left in the room, the woman looks around, admiring the large bedroom and limping around to get a better look at everything.
She gulped as she entered the walk-in closet and saw an array of designer suits and designer shoes. It's the salesman's room. Why did he bring her here? Will they be sharing the same room?
She jumped when she heard his voice coming from the entrance, not realizing she'd been gawking at the closet for a long time now.
"Are you ready to eat?"
She looked at him with wide eyes, which he realized was an endearing expression on her face. She appeared to be completely innocent.
“Why am I staying in your room? I’m sure you have plenty of guest rooms...” Her voice had grown louder, no longer the shy girl he'd seen at the train station.
She observed as the salesman cocked his head to the side and mockingly pouted at her.
"I'm so sorry. Is the princess dissatisfied with this room?" His words, as well as the new nickname, cause her eyes to widen.
“You’re a brat, aren’t you?” When she tries to hide from his gaze, he walks closer to her, tilting her chin up with his fingers.
“If your father allowed you to talk down on him all the time, don’t expect me to do the same. You, my little princess, are in my home. If you want this to work, you must follow my instructions. Failure to do so will result in punishments.” He leans in closer, gazing deeply into her eyes as he enjoys her shaking form.
"And I don't think you like being punished, you crybaby," he smirked, wiping the tears away with his thumb as they began to fall down her cheeks.
“I-I’m not a crybaby!” She whimpered, more tears welling up at the humiliation she was receiving.
“Are you going to cry just because I called you a crybaby?” He cooed, laughing quietly when she shouted no at him before crying harder and desperately trying to wipe the ongoing tears.
He sighed and drew her into a hug, pressing her face against his chest and cooing at her until she calmed down.
After a while, he pulls away before squatting down and wiping away the rest of her tears.
"If you keep being a good girl, I won't have to punish you. Would you be able to do that for me, princess?" He smiles at her, urging her to respond, which she does with a nod.
"I'd like to hear it, princess," he says with another smile as he nods at her.
“I-I’ll be good,” she says shyly before humming when he hugs her.
“My good girl?” He asks again and smiled against her head when she nodded.
The salesman didn’t miss how the girl welcomed his touch with open arms whenever he shows her that he’s the one in control.
He'll have so much fun with his adorable little crybaby.
He gets to his feet and takes her with him, carrying her out of the closet and onto his bed, carefully placing her with a sigh.
He places a white shirt beside her on the bed before leaning down to kiss the top of her head.
"I'll get you some food," he says as he exits the room, leaving her alone.
She looks down at the shirt before pawing at it and realizing that it was one of his. Before she could unfold the shirt, he came back with a tray filled with various food.
She sat up excitedly, waiting for him to approach her, and smiled when she saw the appetizing dish that had been served to her.
She hears him chuckling but ignores it, reaching for the spoon only to have her hand slapped away.
She let out a yelp before looking at him with yet another pair of tearful eyes.
"Patience, my crybaby," he warns before pulling a white cloth from his pocket and hooking it like a bib on the front of her shirt.
She watches him as he takes the spoon she tried to take earlier, scoops some soup on it, and carefully blows on it before guiding it to her lips.
She looks at him strangely, not opening her mouth, but one hard look from him compelled her to comply.
That pleased him.
He observed her lips wrapping around the spoon and considered whether he should simply feed her some fruits with his own hand.
He made the decision to test the waters.
Taking one grape and placing it near her mouth, he licked his lips as he watched her try her hardest not to touch his fingers with her lips. He did, however, surprise her by shoving two fingers inside her mouth. He shot her a warning glance, daring her to bite him, but she didn't.
"Good girl," he smirked as he replaced those two fingers with his thumb and pressed his thumb against her tongue.
He groans as her tongue brushes against his thumb, and with her confused expression, he doubts she knows what she's doing to him.
How hard she’s making him.
He shoves his thumb further, making her gag and produce tears in her eyes.
"Such a crybaby," he cooed before removing his thumb from her mouth and slamming his lips against hers, his tongue replacing his thumb and lapping her tongue with hunger.
Eager to get a taste of her.
He basked in her whimpers and tried his best to taste every corner of her mouth before abruptly pulling away as his cock started to get so stiff that it started to hurt.
He takes her hand by the wrist and gives her a reassuring look before guiding it towards his crotch, making her feel how hard he is through his pants.
"Do you see what you're doing to me?" With a groan, he humps her hand, his jaw clenched in need.
"M-Mister," her small voice only makes him harder, and if he hadn't seen her face filled with tears mixed with that familiar innocence, he would've continued humping her hand.
He comes to a halt, never letting go of her hand, before kneeling on the bed and leaning close to her face.
“Have you never touched someone like this before?”
His face lights up when she shakes her head in disagreement.
"You truly are innocent," he says as he lets go of her hand and caresses her face with both palms.
“Tell me, princess…” He gives her a quick kiss before looking at her face.
"Are you getting wet for me?" he smirks, sliding a hand down her sweatpants, straight to her cunt, and sliding his lithe fingers through her soaking slit.
“Ohh!” He laughs as she closes her eyes in humiliation. He comforts her with his free hand back on her cheek as he shushed her against her lips.
“You’re so wet for me, princess. Are you going to let me take care of you?” He waits for an answer but never receives one.
He growls and pushes the tray off the bed, making a loud noise that causes the girl to open her eyes.
She stares at him with wide, fearful eyes, yelping when he pushes her shoulders so hard that she falls onto her back.
As he climbs over her body, his hand returns to her cunt, the other hand wiping the tears that had begun to fall down the side of her face.
"Has anyone ever touched you here, princess?" He licks his bottom lips as he watches her eyes flutter in pleasure, but she refuses to answer his question, which frustrates him.
When he feels her getting close, he abruptly pulls his hand away, eliciting a quiet whine from her that he would've chuckled at if he wasn't so frustrated with her lack of response to his questions.
“I asked you a question, princess. And I expect an answer!” He growls before yanking her sweatpants down, along with her panties.
“N-No! Nobody!” She screamed, and the salesman grinned, crawling up to press another kiss on her lips.
"Such a good girl," he mutters through the kiss, biting her bottom lip, which causes her hips to jolt against his, slamming into his painfully hard cock.
"Fuck!" he hisses, making the girl beneath him stiffen.
“If you keep doing that, I won’t be able to stop myself from fucking you hard, princess. And believe me when I say that I want to see you fall apart before I do that,” he says as he stares at her needy and curious eyes.
He chuckles at the prospect of her liking what he's doing to her and about to do to her.
“You’d want that, won’t you, princess? Would you like daddy to ruin this lovely pussy?” He slides a finger inside her, eliciting a loud whine from her, her hands harshly gripping his shoulders, attempting to ignore the minor pain from the intrusion.
The salesman clicks his tongue but has a concerned expression on his face.
“How will you handle my cock if you can’t even handle one finger, princess?” When she opens her eyes and looks at him with sad and shy eyes, he smiles.
He sighs as he leans in to kiss her on the nose.
“Don’t worry. Daddy will get you nice and ready before he ruins you with his cock, okay?” Not waiting for a response, he begins to pull the finger out before pushing it back in to produce more juice from her.
He adds another finger before scissoring her and attempting to open her up, her cries and heavy breathing filling his ears.
"If you keep crying like that, I might just fuck you right now," he glares at her cunt before moving his fingers faster, his thumb finding its way to her clit, making her body jolt and him grin with pride.
He focuses on her clit, and when he notices her legs shaking, he knows she's close.
He dives his head towards her neck, licking and sucking on a specific area while his fingers continue to satisfy her cunt. She's squirting under him after a few more strokes, her voice sounding like an angel singing only for him. The way her walls gripped his fingers made him excited, and the pulsing of her clit only increased his desire for her.
Her cries were silenced when he kissed her once more, his tongue lapping her own before pulling away when she moaned needily against him.
He quickly unbuttons his shirt before tossing it somewhere and then yanks his pants off as quickly as he can so he can kiss her lips again, moaning loudly at the taste of her. He grunts before crawling down so he was faced with her cunt.
"I need to taste you down here, princess," he whispers, his breath tickling her, making her clench her thighs around his head, which he stops with his firm hands, spreading her wide open, his hands gripping her tightly, making sure she can't move her thighs.
His tongue danced around her slit before going in to taste her juices. He pulls it out to circle around her clit, flattening it directly on it which makes her mewl above him. A few licks and sucking on her sensitive clit were enough to make her cum again, he smirked as he sat up, watching her face light up with ecstasy.
He quickly crawled back up to her lips, making her taste herself against his lips. His cock rests heavily on her thighs, eager to settle inside her cunt.
He grunts and moans against her lips while humping her thighs, causing her to cry.
“P-please…” Her hands were flat on his stomach, attempting to push him away, her face filled with fear and anxiety as he lines his cock against her cunt.
“I’ll make you feel good, princess. I won’t hurt you purposely,” he assures her, frowning when she shakes her head from side to side.
"Don't make me tie you down, princess," he says dangerously before kissing her cheek and smiling as he wipes her tears away.
"I promise I'll make you feel good," he says as he kisses her lips again before coating his cock with her juices. With dark and lustful eyes, he observes the way his cock slides against her lips.
He looks back at her with an apologetic look before giving her a reassuring pat on her thigh.
"It will hurt at first, but it will only last a second," he explains watching his cock pressing against her slit. He licks his lips as his head enters her with some resistance from her cunt.
He looks at her teary eyes before leaning down to kiss her lips, swallowing the scream she lets out when he pushes his cock all the way inside her. His hand finds its way to her hair, rubbing it comfortingly while the other rubs her side.
“I’m sorry, princess. I’m so sorry,” he says through the kiss, holding his position for a full minute before moving slowly to pull away, cringing slightly when she cries against his kiss. He pulls away from the kiss before kissing her neck, sucking at the hope of marking her and diverting attention away from the pain.
He pushes his cock in one stroke, eliciting a moan from her this time.
He smiles at her closed eyes, enjoying the sensation of her warm pulsing walls surrounding his cock.
He moves his lips from her neck to her chest, licking her nipple before moving the other, teasingly biting it, causing her to clench around his cock.
"Fuck, princess," he moans before thrusting into her faster, his gaze fixed on her face.
He braces himself as he continues to piston into her, hips slamming against hers, eager to hit her as deep as he can with each stroke.
He notices her eyes widening before her hands push against his chest.
“N-No, I...” She whimpers as he grabs both her wrists and places them on the headboard, trapping her as he continues to thrust into her.
“Cum on me, princess. Don’t you fucking dare hold it!” His voice booms, his hips slamming into hers even harder, eager to make her cum around him.
“Do it! Cum for daddy, princess!” They both scream in delight when she finally cums, crying in pleasure as her arms wrap around his torso, pulling him close while his hips continue to thrust into her cunt, motivated and needier at the way her pussy was creaming his cock.
He hears her whining beneath him, too sensitive for his cock, but he only shushes her, kissing her and praising her for being a good girl.
“Just a few more, princess,” he says softly, almost beggingly.
The girl observes him as he cries in pleasure, unable to pull out and cumming inside her. The warmth surprised her, and his constant thrust causes her to cum once more. When he feels her clenching around him again, the salesman groans, laughing heartily at how he was able to make her cum again.
His cock continues to twitch inside her, emptying his seed before collapsing beside her and pulling her against his chest.
"You've been such a good girl, princess," he says before kissing her on the forehead, her eyes already fluttering shut from exhaustion.
"T-thank you, daddy," she mumbles nonchalantly, but his cock, which is still inside her, jumps in delight.
“My good girl,” he smiles before letting himself fall asleep next to her.
The girl wakes up in a bathtub when she hears the man’s voice softly calling her.
“It’s your father,” he says, pointing at the smartphone in his hands.
"Would you like to tell him something, princess?" The man smirks at the haughty expression on the girl's face. She nods and gazes adoringly at the man as he kneels beside the tub and places the phone by her ear, bright eyes fixed on her.
“I don’t need you anymore, daddy. I’m not going home and I’m not apologizing for something that I didn’t do,” she ends with a huff, watching the man smirk at the phone before ending the call.
"Good girl," he says, his hands caressing her thighs beneath the pink water.
“How are you feeling? Did I go too hard on you?” He looks at her with concern in his eyes.
The girl shakes her head and smiles at him, her hand resting on top of his.
"Just a little sore, daddy," she whispers, giggling as his eyes darken.
"Let's get you ready for bed," he says as he pulls her up and out of the tub, his hands under her arms.
He takes his time drying her, the big towel feeling soft against her skin and she gulps at the way he took his time drying her private parts.
The girl admires his face when he buttons his shirt on her body.
“What are you looking at, brat?” He teases, smirking when she pouts, eyes threatening to make tears.
“I’m not a brat!”
"No, you aren't. You're a crybaby," he quips, amused by the way she frowns at him. He wipes the lines away from her face, kissing her nose repeatedly, which makes her giggle.
"You're my little crybaby, princess. And you're not going to leave me, are you?" He looks at her intimately, his heart pounding as he waits for her response.
"Never, daddy," she says as she pecks his lips. As she attempted to pull back, he drew her back, a hand behind her head to prevent her from fleeing.
He jumps into bed with her, turning their bodies until he's straddling her.
“It’s you and me forever,” he smiles when she nods in agreement at him.
The salesman admires the girl, his heart skipping a beat at the memory of his original plan for her. He was relieved that he had not allowed his girl to participate in the game. She didn't belong there. She belonged nowhere but with him. She's finally found her place.
She’s where she belongs now.
With him.
a/n: we might have not learned a lesson here but we did get ourselves a fine zaddy so ✌🏼
been kinda simping for this guy so I had to make a thirst trap for him :3 im not dead btw. but not too far from it too. university is killing ur girl :’) i’ve been thinking of writing a squid game au for a while now too like frontman!steve or whatever but ehh
also, i know i fucked up the ddakji game so pls try to ignore that 🥴
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