#kp let me leave challenge

[priapussdick]

not me almost sobbing while watching barcode cry coz Jeff left boc.

[waitmyturtles]

Turtles Catches Up With Old GMMTV: KinnPorsche, and Analyzing the KP Cultural Zeitgeist Edition (Part 1)

[What’s going on here? After joining Tumblr and discovering Thai BLs through KinnPorsche in 2022, I began watching GMMTV’s new offerings -- and realized that I had a lot of history to catch up on, to appreciate the more recent works that I was delving into. From tropes to BL frameworks, what we’re watching now hails from somewhere, and I’m learning about Thai BL's history through what I’m calling the Old GMMTV Challenge (OGMMTVC). Starting with recommendations from @absolutebl on their post regarding how GMMTV is correcting for its mistakes with its shows today, I’ve made an expansive list to get me through a condensed history of essential/classic/significant Thai BLs produced by GMMTV and many other BL studios. My watchlist, pasted below, lists what I’ve watched and what’s upcoming, along with the reviews I’ve written so far. Today, in a two-part series, I offer my thoughts on KinnPorsche, my very first Thai BL, and the impact that I think KP has had on the Thai BL industry since 2022.]

Hot damn! It has been a MINUTE since my last OGMMTVC review, so I'm glad to be back. I've been very much looking forward to writing my thoughts about my recent KinnPorsche rewatch: I enjoyed this ENTIRE process, especially in regards to watching KinnPorsche in the context and chronology of past Thai BLs, and man, did I ever see KP WAYYYYY differently than the first time I watched it.

Why's that? Welp -- *KinnPorsche was my first-ever Thai BL*. (Not my first BL drama ever; that award goes to the GOAT, Kinou Nani Tabeta?/What Did You Eat Yesterday?)

But when I joined Tumblr officially in July 2022, just about a year and a half ago (in the heat of passionately obsessing over Old Fashion Cupcake), my dash was awash, AWASH, in KP posts. AWASH.

I had no idea what the fuck the algorithm was telling me.

I went into KinnPorsche knowing absolutely NOTHING about Thai BL tropes, the history of the genre, the actors in the roles, what made KP so innovative by way of its storyline, NADA. Dudes -- I'm half-Malaysian, and I had never even watched a show from the Southeast Asian region, let alone Thailand, and I was unaware of how prolific the Thai drama industry was (at least compared to the Korean drama machine).

When I first watched KinnPorsche, my perspective was that I had watched a pretty good show, and I was left surprised back then in particular by the No Homophobia Bubble (well, almost no homophobia, Big) that I now know is so much more common in Thai BLs than I realized.

It was through KinnPorsche that I discovered Thai BLs, and it was subsequently through Bad Buddy that I realized that I NEEDED to understand the development of this national genre -- so back to the history annals I went, through my OGMMTVC project, starting from 2014's Love Sick, and here we are at this moment of the timeline, the hot hot late spring and summer of 2022, enjoying the ✨vibbbeeezz✨ between Mile Phakphum and Apo Nattawin, and leaving me wondering why there was a national shirt button shortage in the midst of a Thai mafia crime drama. I'm glad I have history on my side now as I think about KinnPorsche as a standalone drama, and as I also think about the impact it has had on the Thai BL genre and fandoms prior to its premiere, up to today's moment in time.

I took my time to draft this piece partly because I was busy watching Be On Cloud's second and latest serial drama in Dead Friend Forever. I think BOC is doing something very interesting by way of their acting and contracted scripting choices, which I want to ponder by way of the context and aftermath of KP's airing. As such, while I had intended to write just one post about KP, I have a bunch of thoughts that'll spill over to tomorrow. So here we go, a quick overall outline for the lovers for today and tomorrow on my ruminating thoughts:

1) My critical thoughts on KinnPorsche as a standalone drama in the context of the history of previous Thai BLs, 2) My thoughts on how new arrivals to the wider Thai BL fandom shaped the perception of KP vis à vis older Thai BLs, 3) How I think KP has impacted how other studios approach, market, and write Thai BLs now, and 4) A quick passing thought on BOC's own continued influence on the Thai BL genre and industry since 2022, particularly by way of Dead Friend Forever.

I'm going to concentrate on numbers 1 and 2 in this piece, and they're actually going to be a touch conflated, because I want to lean into a now-obvious fact that the BL Elder community knew all along about KP when it first aired in 2022: there was not much that was new about what KinnPorsche was doing. (This is not necessarily a bad thing, as I’ll get into below.)

When I was a newbie on Tumblr, and the algorithm was feeding my dash, I remember seeing posts about how Be On Cloud, the studio behind KP, was doing things differently than the rest of the Thai BL field -- I recall posts about the studio hiring the best acting coaches, how the cinematography was nothing like what we had seen in other shows, and how Be On Cloud was committed to creating safe environments for its actors, particularly Apo Nattawin, who had reportedly faced discrimination in his past acting career, reportedly leading him to leave the Thai drama industry for a number of years.

While some very early Thai BL studios were known to not have the safest or friendliest environments (the filming of What The Duck comes to mind by way of this lore), by the time of KP's airing, GMMTV had strongly established itself as the leader of Thai BL productions, and other players, including New Siwaj and Cheewin Thanamin, had produced quite the number of dramas under each of their respective studio outfits. The industry, by 2020 and 2021, when KP was in its development origins, wasn't new anymore. Acting coaches, such as Aof Noppharnach, were now also regularly writing, directing, and producing original shows, and major BL studios had introduced workshopping as a regular step to production. On the artistic end, studios and writers had established expected artistic tropes -- 2018's Love By Chance is the first example that comes to my mind of when the Thai BL genre crystallized in a structurally derivative piece of art by way of containing and using prior trope references and dynamics.

Be On Cloud, in picking up the KinnPorsche script from Filmania during the pandemic (I use these posts here and here for my non-primary sources of KP lore) clearly knew it had something innovative on its hands by way of producing the genre's first mafia-based BL romance.

But 2020's Manner of Death had already introduced crime and mystery to BL, and 2021's Not Me continued a multi-genre perspective somewhat successfully around romance. And regarding sex and heat: KinnPorsche didn't do that first, either. MaxTul brought it first in 2017's Together With Me, and MAME has owned this corner since 2018's Love By Chance and 2019's TharnType. (Props to MaxTul for being in both Together With Me and Manner of Death; MileApo owe those dudes some beers.) By way of cinematography, which KP does extremely well: we had already begun seeing prestige cinematography in 2020's I Told Sunset About You, and 2021's I Promised You The Moon and A Tale of Thousand Stars.

It was natural, I think, for much of the KP fandom to think that KP was innovative in a lot of these categories, because, like me -- KP was our first-ever Thai BL. By way of money clearly spent on the show, the directorial purview of the show, the utterly gorgeous cinematography (man, that nighttime pull-away shot when the guys are in the roof pool, oof, why couldn't I find a gif), a new fan might think, geez, this has never been done before! But it had, and not just in Thailand, but for years prior in Japan, and more recently in Korea.

This is ALL not to say that KinnPorsche “suffered” because of what I'm uncovering by way of KP's misunderstood innovation. I think a perception of KP being entirely “new” in the BL field has contributed to its lore and enduring influential status. On this rewatch, I appreciated the mafia-based storyline as a support system to the central KinnPorsche romance. Yok being centered as an important mentor to Porsche, played by the inimitable Sprite Patteerat, was refreshing to see. Porsche accepting his bisexuality, especially with Yok's support, without the typical BL head-spinning queer revelation, was a welcome element to the show. And, frankly -- I had, on my first watch, missed, of course, the clear references to Thai BLs of the past in this show, references that I really loved seeing this time around.

From the old school, we got Kob Songsit, the OG BL dad, no longer Tong's dad in the seminal movie, The Love of Siam, nor Dean's dad in Until We Meet Again. This BL veteran is now a damn dad don, weapons and all.

We've also got Na Naphat, who played important side characters in IPYTM and UWMA. We have former BL lead guys in Jeff Satur and Perth Nakhun. We've got guitars and singing, we have underwater smooching, we have a cute-cute first date. We arguably have questionable kabedon in Kinn's and Porsche's first intimate moments. We have cooking for your lover, we have feeding your lover, we have the towel-drying of the hair. KP, by 2022, keeps up with Idol Factory's Secret Crush On You in prominently featuring a femme-presenting side character in Tankhun, PHENOMENALLY ACTED by Tong Thanayut, who we had seen previously in TharnType.

KP was, in part, directed by Pepzi Banchorn, who served as an assistant director on 2019's Dark Blue Kiss and 2021-22's Bad Buddy, and had a quick guest spot in 2022's The Warp Effect. KP was also, in part, directed by Khom Kongkiat, who played Uncle Tong in Bad Buddy, and subsequently directed The Promise in 2023. AND, finally, one of the KP screenwriters is Bee Pongsate, who has co-written so much flippin' BL: Last Twilight, Bad Buddy, Dangerous Romance (😬), Vice Versa, My School President, A Tale of Thousand Stars, 2gether and Still 2gether, and that's not even scratching the list -- you get it.

KP's supporting cast and crew was simply stacked with BL vets, who clearly knew the scene, and who helped to support Mile Phakphum's rookie acting and Apo Nattawin's return to the screen. I'd posit that this group of people knew EXACTLY what references they were putting into KinnPorsche, from actors to tropes, and also knew when, where, and how to innovate around those references to still make this show unique.

Certainly, KP's approach to sex and heat -- by way of Kinn's and Porsche's first drunken encounters (hi again, MaxTul), the uncut intimate scenes between them, and Vegas's and Pete's union by way of, well, semi-torture and/or kink -- was bold enough to be overall quite notable. But again: Thai BLs had been pushing that envelope for years past, and it has continued to do so in shows like MAME's Love In the Air and GMMTV's Only Friends.

In other words: after this rewatch, with the history of the older Thai BLs I've watched under my belt, I don't see KinnPorsche as firstly innovative. But I appreciate the show differently now, in particular for how very obvious it worked to include past Thai BL references in its production, and I actually gained a different appreciation for it.

I also want to made a quick tangential note about Apo and Tong specifically by way of innovation. Dr. Thomas Baudinette, a long-time BL fan and academic researcher on Thai and Japanese queer media, notes in his book, Boys Love Media in Thailand, that an ideal trajectory for a Thai BL actor is to debut in BLs in order to transition to more popular primetime het Thai dramas, as Gulf Kanuwat of TharnType, and Ohm Thitiwat and Kao Noppakao of UWMA and Lovely Writer, respectively, are notably doing at the moment. Apo Nattawin did this the other way around: he had established his career in het lakorns, most notably in 2015’s major hit drama, Sut Khaen Saen Rak, and subsequently left the Thai drama industry after reportedly being discriminated against for his skin tone and fashion choices. And his way back to the industry was through BLs. Taking the lore of Mile Phakphum recruiting Apo for KP out of the picture for a moment: I think this indicates a shift in how BLs are increasingly perceived in Thailand, and even globally, as being a career-worthy genre of content on its own for actors. (Apo's exploding fashion career is proof of this.) And BOC has now recruited another lakorn vet in Jes Jespipat for its third upcoming drama, 4 Minutes.

As well, Tong Thanayut’s very public coming out after the conclusion of KP’s airing is notable for how Be On Cloud has continued to center Tong in its productions after that fact, most notably in 2023’s film, Man Suang, while other out BL actors are not as lucky by way of guaranteeing and attracting future work.

I have a lot more to say about KinnPorsche's and Be On Cloud's impact on the current Thai BL industry, and how I think that impact has affected the marketing and creation of more recent shows like 2023's Only Friends, and 2023-24's Playboyy. But this first post has gotten long, and I actually haven't written much about the actual show itself, HA. So let me say this:

I think it's notable that the first shows that played around with themes outside of romance, like 2020's Manner of Death, and 2021's Not Me, were not perfect shows. We see now how multi-genre BLs are just exploding, what with Dead Friend Forever and the upcoming slew of vampire BLs that are going to drop (and let's not forget the first omegaverse BL drama in Pit Babe -- or should we forget it, I dunno). Not all of these shows are perfect, but the genre has only been around for a decade. There's a lot of time, and a tremendous amount of interest and funding, that upcoming shows can leverage to become better, especially these multi-genre shows that we're seeing more of.

KinnPorsche as well, was not a perfect show. I have some thoughts particularly on VegasPete to offer tomorrow, and I think, overall, that KP could have easily been a shorter series with more impact.

But I'll still give the show some of its flowers, because I think, unlike MoD and Not Me, that KinnPorsche did a better job of centering the Kinn and Porsche romance for dramatic effect, particularly by leveraging comedy. Were there many moments of hibbly-jibblies? Oh, totally. Dudes, also, Kinn fucking forgot about Pete! Pete coming back to the house and reminiscing about Vegas while holding his neck? Eeeeyikes, no thanx. There were a number of these weird bumps that I think could be explained by way of intentional camp (which I think KP did pretty well), but I do believe the show could have been tighter with more editing.

But, I gotta admit: I had a great time re-watching KP. That says something. Was it the heat that tiddled my dopamine cycles? Probably, somewhat. (No shame in my game.) Or -- a more reasonable theory, ha, is that Apo, as a veteran actor, demonstrated more range than I originally remembered. He can really do comedy well, and he timed his comedy perfectly for the absurdities that peppered KP through the series (the bread crawl, the constant throwing of hands, the jumping-on-Kinn when the ghost of Pete showed up, oh shit we're in the forest now, etc). Apo and Tong, in particular, stayed true to the bit many times during the show, and I think the series benefitted greatly from their collective comedic talent and timing -- which I thought was nicely refreshing for the genre.

With that, I'll have more ruminating tomorrow about the show itself, about how I think the impact that KP and BOC have had on the genre after KP's airing, and other thoughts about the cultural moment that KP demarcated when it aired -- see you tomorrow!

[MORE MORE MORE KP tomorrow! And I'll have more thoughts about the watchlist then. But for now, here's the classic OGMMTVC list for you to chew on!

1) The Love of Siam (2007) (movie) (review here) 2) My Bromance (2014) (movie) (review here) 3) Love Sick and Love Sick 2 (2014 and 2015) (review here) 4) Gay OK Bangkok Season 1 (2016) (a non-BL queer series directed by Jojo Tichakorn and written by Aof Noppharnach) (review here) 5) Make It Right (2016) (review here) 6) SOTUS (2016-2017) (review here) 7) Gay OK Bangkok Season 2 (2017) (a non-BL queer series directed by Jojo Tichakorn and written by Aof Noppharnach) (review here) 8) Make It Right 2 (2017) (review here) 9) Together With Me (2017) (review here) 10) SOTUS S/Our Skyy x SOTUS (2017-2018) (review here) 11) Love By Chance (2018) (review here) 12) Kiss Me Again: PeteKao cuts (2018) (no review) 13) He’s Coming To Me (2019) (review here) 14) Dark Blue Kiss (2019) and Our Skyy x Kiss Me Again (2018) (review here) 15) TharnType (2019-2020) (review here) 16) Senior Secret Love: Puppy Honey (OffGun BL cuts) (2016 and 2017) (no review) 17) Theory of Love (2019) (review here) 18) 3 Will Be Free (2019) (a non-BL and an important harbinger of things to come in 2019 and beyond re: Jojo Tichakorn pushing queer content in non-BLs) (review here) 19) Dew the Movie (2019) (review here) 20) Until We Meet Again (2019-2020) (review here) (and notes on my UWMA rewatch here) 21) 2gether (2020) and Still 2gether (2020) (review here) 22) I Told Sunset About You (2020) (review here) 23) YYY (2020, out of chronological order) (review here) 24) Manner of Death (2020-2021) (review here) 25) A Tale of Thousand Stars (2021) (review here) 26) A Tale of Thousand Stars (2021) OGMMTVC Fastest Rewatch Known To Humankind For The Sake Of Rewatching Our Skyy 2 x BBS x ATOTS (re-review here) 27) Lovely Writer (2021) (review here) 28) Last Twilight in Phuket (2021) (the mini-special before IPYTM) (review here) 29) I Promised You the Moon (2021) (review here) 30) Not Me (2021-2022) (review here) 31) Bad Buddy (2021-2022) (thesis here) 32) 55:15 Never Too Late (2021-2022) (not a BL, but a GMMTV drama that features a macro BL storyline about shipper culture and the BL industry) (review here) 33) Bad Buddy (2021-2022) and Our Skyy 2 x BBS x ATOTS (2023) OGMMTVC Rewatch (Links to the BBS OGMMTVC Meta Series are here: preamble here, part 1, part 2, part 3a, part 3b, and part 4) 34) Secret Crush On You (2022) (review here) 35) KinnPorsche (2022) (tag here)  36) KinnPorsche (2022) OGMMTVC Fastest Rewatch Known To Humankind For the Sake of Re-Analyzing the KP Cultural Zeitgeist

...interrupting the OGMMTVC list here to watch War of Y (2022) (watching) in chronology to decide if it gets listed...

37) The Eclipse (2022) (tag here) 38) The Eclipse OGMMTVC Rewatch to Reexamine “Genre BLs” and Internalized/Externalized Homophobia in GMMTV Shows  39) GAP (2022-2023) (Thailand’s first GL) 40) My School President (2022-2023) and Our Skyy 2 x My School President (2023) 41) Moonlight Chicken (2023) (tag here) 42) Bed Friend (2023) (tag here) 43 La Pluie (2023) (review coming) 44) Be My Favorite (2023) (tag here) (I’m including this for BMF’s sophisticated commentary on Krist’s career past as a BL icon) 45) Wedding Plan (2023) (Recommended as an important trajectory in the course of MAME’s work and influence from TharnType) 46) Only Friends (2023) (tag here) (not technically a BL, but it certainly became one in the end) 47) Last Twilight (2023-24) (tag here) (on the list as Thailand’s first major BL to center disability, successfully or otherwise) 48) Cherry Magic Thailand (2023-24) (tag here) (on the list as the first major Japanese-to-Thai drama adaptation, featuring the comeback of TayNew) 49) Ossan’s Love Returns (2024) (adding for the EarthMix cameo and the eventual Thai remake) 50) Dead Friend Forever (2024) (thoughts here) 51) 23.5 (tag here) (2024)]

[ac1numa]

@deathruined, stefan salavatore asked to katherine pierce : " do I really have that much of an effect on you? "

kp. " stefan, you've always had a way of getting under my skin, whether i admit it or not. your presence has a way of stirring things up, even in this undead existence of mine. " chocolate-hues lock with his green ones as a smirk appears on her red painted lips. " maybe it's your unwavering goodness or the way you challenge me. whatever it is, i can't deny that you leave an impact on me. but don't let it go to your head; it doesn't mean i've gone all mushy inside. it's just the unpredictable dance of our complicated connection. you know how it goes. "

[aellynera]

Restrained (Santiago “Pope” Garcia x Reader)

RESTRAINED

(i just do what my brain tells me to, guys. it wouldn’t shut up until i wrote this.)

Word Count: 2660

Summary: Santiago issues a challenge. Purely innocent of course. But to be fair, those should not have been in the supply closet.

Warnings: Little bit o’ language.

(with prompts: “do it. i dare you.”; “how about a hug, hm?”; “is this your first time?”)

Santiago Garcia walked back into the munitions room with two more canvas duffel bags and threw them on the small counter. “Hey, got more bags.”

“Thanks,” you replied, turning around to grab one. You almost bumped into him in the close quarters. “You load ammo, I’ll check and load the weapons?”

He nodded in agreement, grabbed the other bag and started packing it. You worked in a comfortable silence.

It was more of a closet than a room, really, but it had all the fun toys you needed for your next mission. So here you were in over 100 degree heat, in a teeny room, getting things ready to go. You puffed a piece of stray hair off your forehead and wondered if the temperature in the small room wasn’t just being caused by the brilliant sunshine outside.

You side-eyed your partner, noting (not for the first time) that it wasn’t fair for him to look that good in fatigue pants, dark grey tank, and combat boots. The thin sheen of sweat on his brow as he worked only added to the effect. You felt the tips of your ears start to color and turned back to concentrate on the rack of artillery in front of you.

Pope was giving you some side-eye too, but he was equally subtle about it. You were dressed the same as he was, only your tank was olive green and he thought you wore it better. He turned his attention back to the ammo crates next to him.

You had worked together for two years, after both being assigned to operations in Colombia. One semi-drunken night not long after you’d arrived at base, you had bonded with the group you fondly called The Boys, Pope in particular. You just had an easy-going back-and-forth, he was easy to talk to, and you’d had some similar experiences in both your families that helped to deepen your connection. You considered him your best friend; he felt the same.

The Boys, much to your annoyance, had a bet going on how long it would take you and Pope to get together. It was no secret they all thought you would make the perfect couple, or at least the perfect hookup. Both of you laughed it off. It was not a time to even consider having a relationship, much less with your best friend.

Not that you hadn’t actually considered it. More than once. Okay, maybe a lot. And neither of you would even consider that the other might have done the same. You were best friends.

Suddenly his short, sharp laugh broke the silence. “What in the hell?”

You looked over and saw him holding up something silver. Definitely not a weapon or ammo. You squinted, huffing that damn piece of hair out of your eyes again.

“Are those...handcuffs?”

Pope sounded a mix between amused and surprised. “Um, yeah.”

“Santi,” you tilted your head. “Why do you have a pair of handcuffs?”

He shrugged. “I don’t know. They were just here in the ammo crate.”

“That’s incredibly odd,” you chuckled. “Why would we have any use for handcuffs?”

Pope laughed full-on at that. You reached over and swatted at him. “That’s not what I meant, you ass. I know what handcuffs are for.” Okay, so you really were trying to get your work done, but you couldn’t help joking with him. It was just what you did.

He looked at the handcuffs in his hand, then up at you. One side of his mouth lifted in a smirk and he raised an eyebrow. 

You took a step back and pursed your lips. You knew that look. That look was never good. That look meant trouble and shenanigans when you were not inside a munitions closet, and probably meant exactly the same thing inside one, knowing how Santiago worked. And you knew how he worked. He might be a master tactician and an exceptional soldier, but his sense of humor and penchant for mischief was definitely off-kilter and somewhat juvenile at times. You could almost see the thoughts forming in his head.

“Seriously, Pope? We need to finish packing this shit up and get it loaded. We leave in two hours. Put the cuffs down and get back to it,” you said sternly.

He paused a second, but his expression didn’t change. “What if…”

Your heart suddenly vaulted up into your throat. The room was getting warmer.

“What if we make a bet? I bet you can’t finish packing that bag in less than five minutes if you’re cuffed.”

Now your heart was almost oozing out of your ears. You put on the blankest expression you could muster. “I’m sorry...what?”

“You can’t pack that bag in less than five minutes while you’re cuffed,” Pope repeated, more of a challenge this time. He took a step closer.

“What’s the wager?” you asked, trying to sound normal. It was...sort of working.

Pope thought for a moment. He pulled his bottom lip with his teeth as he did so. “Okay, if you win, then I pick up your KP for a month. If I win...I take you into town for dinner and dancing next time we have leave.”

Your jaw dropped. You weren’t sure which was more unsettling right now: the fact that you were almost one hundred percent certain you could actually do it, how much shit you could give Pope for having to cover KP, or the fact that your best friend wanted to put handcuffs on you and watch you try. Or maybe it was that you were one hundred percent sure you were going to let him. And on top of all that...did he just ask you out on a date? By challenging you to do tricks while handcuffed? Well, if that’s the game he wanted to play...before you could stop yourself, the words flew out of your mouth.

“Do it...I dare you.”

A strangled sound echoed throughout the room as Pope nearly choked on his tongue. He did not expect you to actually agree. But he quickly recovered and in an instant he had closed the few steps between you and slapped one of the rings around your right wrist. He was about to put the other one on you but you grabbed his hand. You had just thought of something.

Your eyes narrowed. “Do you even have the key for these?”

He shrugged and you noticed that mischievous flash spark in his eyes again. “Nope. But don’t worry, honey, I can pick the lock.”

He almost had time to catch the matching glint in your eyes before you moved your hand in a flash, grabbed the metal ring, and locked the second cuff around his wrist.

“You do not play fair,” he snapped, eyes glued to your now-joined wrists.

You couldn’t help the wry grin that broke out on your face. “You’re the one who wanted to put these on me and have me pack a weapons cache!”

He bobbed his head from side to side slightly and smirked back. “Fine, fine, points to you. But, um, how are we getting out of this now?”

“Pope! You said you could pick the lock!”

“I can,” he shot back, “but the tools I need to do it are over there and we have one small problem.”

As if being handcuffed to your extremely attractive best friend in a supply closet wasn’t a problem.

He lifted his left wrist and grabbed the support pole that was between you.

Oh. That small problem. The pole basically split the worktable in two, and it was only about an inch away from the wall. Which was fine except you hadn’t noticed the handcuffs had somehow gotten threaded behind the pole before you attached yourself to Pope. There was no way for either of you to maneuver around the pole, and the tools were definitely out of reach. Just out of reach, of course. You had been so distracted by him and his newly-acquired apparatus and you silently cursed yourself and Pope for this major oversight.

You were stuck.

“Damn it, Pope!”

“It’s not my fault!”

“How did you even get the cuffs around the pole?!”

“This wouldn’t have happened if you hadn’t cuffed me!”

“This would have happened at all if you weren’t so...so…”

“So...what?” 

Before you knew what happened, you were only inches apart from each other. The room was definitely getting warmer. A lot warmer. Both of you stared at each other, breathing hard and not speaking for what seemed like forever.

Your eye contact broke first. You couldn’t look at him anymore. You were too close, too sweaty, too nervous, too fucking handcuffed to Santiago Garcia.

“Hey,” he said suddenly, as he placed his index finger under your chin so you looked back up at him. His eyes had lost the up-to-trouble spark, and now he looked like he might be worried that you might actually be mad at him. But, being Pope, he only let that show for a second. “Is this your first time?”

“My...what?” your lips curled in confusion and you just...stared...at him.

“Is this your first time in handcuffs?” He tried to keep a straight face. He really did. But it was so hot in the room and the ridiculousness of the situation had really started to dawn on him. So did the idea that this was a chance he did not want to waste. His face refused to cooperate and the bastard was laughing.

You punched him in the shoulder with your free hand, a bit harder than you intended.

“Ow!” he yelped as you muttered “Sorry” and tried to look away again. He didn’t let you.

Pope raised an eyebrow and you couldn’t help it, you started to smile back. Might as well keep playing the game. You could still win. “No,” you replied.

“No?” There was no way Pope could hide the amusement in his voice now. Not just amusement, he thought. Definitely not just amusement.

“Nope,” you sighed as you reached your free hand up towards the strap of his tank. “Just the first time in handcuffs with you.” The inflection in your response made it abundantly clear that...oh god, your brain screamed at itself. What were you doing.

“Mmhmm,” Pope hummed as he pulled you as close as possible, what with two of your hands stuck around a pole. His eyes darkened and you thought his voice sounded more raspy but at this point your brain wasn’t exactly firing on all cylinders so you just kept your stare focused on his. And also his lips.

He looked at your lips, too. Despite the way your nerves were suddenly misfiring, you were very aware that Pope stared at your lips. He did that damn thing where he stuck the tip of his tongue out over his bottom lip and then pulled his lip with his teeth.

You shuddered ever so slightly.

You were now even more aware that his lips were centimeters from yours.

“How about a hug, hm?” he practically whispered, that stupid grin still on his face. His hand moved to brush that rogue strand of hair off your sweaty face.

“Just a hug?” you whispered back.

Your breath hitched and you both felt your hearts beat faster and faster and the room got even hotter and you swore the walls were actually shrinking as made the barest movement towards each other…

“Oh! That’s where I left those! I’ve been looking for them everywhere.” Frankie’s voice rang out in the room.

You and Pope quickly pulled away from each other and swung your heads to the doorway in surprise. Frankie stood there, hands in his pockets. He looked between the two of you.

“Aren’t you supposed to be packing for a mission?” he asked, nonchalance radiating off him.

Pope ran his free hand over his jaw. “Frankie. What are you talking about?”

“My handcuffs. I’ve been looking for them.” Frankie made it sound like it was the most obvious explanation in the world.

You and Pope exchanged a confused look and Pope sighed. “Why do you have handcuffs and why were they in...you know what? Never mind. I don’t even want to know.”

Frankie wagged his finger between you and Pope. It seemed like he had just noticed your predicament. “I’m not sure I want to know either.”

You rolled your eyes. Of all the people who had to show up. “Fish, trust me when I say I don’t want to know either, and never mind how this happened, but...”

Frankie giggled. You ignored it and continued. “Anyway, do you happen to, I don’t know, maybe have the goddamn key?”

“Of course I have the key,” Frankie replied, as if it was perfectly normal to lose a set of handcuffs and also just happen to have the key in his back pocket. He pulled the key out and walked over. “How long have you two been stuck like this, anyway?”

“Doesn’t matter,” Pope replied, stealing a glance at you. Not long enough.

“Can you just let us go so we can get back to prep?” you asked sweetly, stealing a glance at Pope. Not long enough.

“Yeah, yeah, sure,” Frankie said and unlocked the cuffs first from you, then from Pope. He put the cuffs and keys in his back pocket and passed a suspicious look between the two of you. “You know, you really should stop fucking around in the munitions closet.”

You pinched the bridge of your nose.

Pope closed his eyes. “Frankie, you had a pair of handcuffs in here.”

“Didn’t say anything about me and the munitions closet.” He ducked Pope’s hand and ran out of the room. His laughter cackled down the hallway as he went and you heard him shout, “Benny! You’re never gonna guess what just happened and you owe me $10, fucker!”

Pope looked up at the ceiling like he was praying for strength. 

You turned back to the abandoned weapons bag and started to pack it up again. Pope turned back to the ammo bag and did the same. You worked in an awkward silence for several minutes, until you zipped up your bag and turned towards the door.

“I could have done it in less than four.”

Pope didn’t turn his head to look at you, but the corners of the eye you could see crinkled deeply. “I know you could have.”

“Were you going to...” A light bulb went off in your head. “You were going to cuff me to the pole the whole time, just so you could win the bet, weren’t you.” Your lips twitched as you leaned on the door and fixed him with a stare. Was Pope blushing? He would probably argue that it was just really, really hot in this little room...but you knew better.

He didn’t say anything. He didn’t look at you. He just cleared his throat and kept packing the bag.

“Santiago Garcia, you could have just asked me. I would have said yes.”

He looked up quickly. “Really?” That was the answer he had hoped for. It was not the answer he actually expected, but definitely hoped. 

“Really. There’s that cantina down by the water. I want enyucado when we get back,” you gave him a sweet smile before you turned and left the room to pack your bag into the transport.

A moment later, you head poked back into the doorway. “Oh, and Santi?”

“Yeah?” he asked, a somewhat dumbfounded grin still on his face.

“If you wanted to have me in handcuffs that badly...I would have said yes to that too.”

Santiago’s jaw hit the floor as he watched your retreating form. He finished packing his bag in a daze and followed a few moments later. Oh, he was definitely going to take you up on that offer.

~end~

[disisphlebotinum]

Meryem - Episode 3

I don't feel things anymore.

We left off with Meryem, her home, my hopes, and my dreams all in flames.

I love that the bird got free. Killing the bird would have caused me to rage quit so hard.

Thank goodness. I need Savas to save her. I mean, Douchebag started everything, but Savas started the fire.

Damn. Poor Douchebag’s girlfriend who sacrifices everything for him just to get cheated on didn’t die in the fire.

Damn Darin. Back at it with the random tantrum.

Not in a sexual way, but in a life way, Darin and Baba’s relationship makes me uncomfortable.

Baba and Azade from KP are OTP. Fight me.

Oh damn, did Savas just catch up?! A girl who runs into a fire without a second thought for a bird probably isn’t going to just leave a person on the side of the road.

I really like the dynamic between Savas and Brother. I promise I will learn his name later. I don’t have the imdb page pulled up right now and apparently I’m too lazy.

I feel like Douchebag would probably take a crack at Meryem like he did her father if Savas hadn’t walked in.

Let’s play the get Douchebag off my screen challenge. No losers, all winners.

Pretty sure that officer just picked up a prostitute.

I hope Meryem running into the burning building burns itself on the back of Savas’s eyeballs.

So they threaten to kill each other, then fuck. But the couples I ship are never allowed to fuck. What is wrong with this?! Why can’t we see not shitty people be happy?!

I do like Darin’s hair this episode.

Lmao. Savas told his dad he was a bad father and the dude couldn’t argue.

Brother should not have been flirting like that.

LOL. Fucker got caught!

In another show, Darin and Savas could have worked. You know… if she didn’t leave his pregnant fiance in the middle of the road on a rainy night… Also, if Ayca wasn’t in it. I do kind of see how she might be able to lie to herself about their friendship though.

I WANT THIS DOUCHEBAG TO STOP HARASSING MERYEM. HE HAS FUCKING DONE ENOUGH DAMAGE!

Him having the nerve to call anyone boring when he has that mustache on his face.

They really had to take everything from Meryem, huh.

Am I allowed to skip Baba’s scenes? I really don’t care.

Wait… Meryem’s uncle is Baba’s enemy?

Lol. Savas said “Fuck his flight”

People are extremely casually rough with women in ways I really don’t like in this series so far. I’ve seen a man grab a woman by her hair more than once. I’m not cool with that. Knock it off please.

Savas is right. You would think Baba would at least give a shit about the fact that his grandchild was killed.

I wish Meryem’s dad could talk. She’s so cute and trying so hard. It’s breaking my heart.

I NEED LESS OF THESE ASSHOLES ON MY SCREEN PLEASE!

Unless Baba is going to murder Douchebag and I start stanning the man, I don’t need to see their faces anymore.

Can he exist without being a shithead towards a woman?

We need more brothers like Savas and Abi. (real name next episode)

Savas eavedropping made me start paying attention again. Him bursting in the room made me wake up.

Woah. All of a sudden people are fucking busting out kicks and fighting.

Savas is kidnapping Meryem!

How fucking dare this show go from Savas and Meryem and chaos to this boring bullshit between two bastards!

To be honest, I stopped paying attention. Something about money. I hate it them both.

Now we’re in a high speed chase and I have to keep looking at Art Life! WHAT THE FUCK!

Like I care how the Dipshits are handling the news of the case! LET ME SEE THE DAMN CASE!

I might be in love with Abi.

I love that they are saying Fuck. Even if it is bleeped out.

I am I love with Abi. If he dies. I will die.

I do love that Douchebag is watching his whole plan fall apart. Like he’s hanging out with Savas’s dad while it’s on a timer to come crashing down the moment people start having conversations.

Yay, first clue for Meryem to piece things together.

Savas locking Meryem in the house is weird.

Because people can’t break windows?! Grab a chair and knock out a window?!

I LOVE ABI!

Just need to point out that what I find interesting in fiction is not an indication of things I like in real life or things that I think would be okay in the real world. Angry Savas is super hot! Like the way he just threatened to tie her up was not something I should have found as attractive as I did.

DOUCHEBAG PUT HIS HANDS ON ABI! IF THIS DOES NOT END IN HIS MURDER THEN I GET TO SUE!

Their chemistry is too much for me right now. Savas and Meryem have a charged energy and I need to get to the fun parts. This is all sad and they are too good at being sad.

That bit with the door was good. I need Meryem to realize he saved her. Like, I kind of thought she noticed his arm before.

I would like to spend less time in Turkish jails and prisons please.

I would totally be fine with Meryem running away to save herself from a dangerous situation, but I’m pretty sure she is going for help. I mean, the dude threw his phone out the window and she doesn’t have one. She’s going to have to foot it either way.

Can we take bets on Douchebag and Darin banging by the end of the series?

I don’t like how beat up Abi is. I have nothing but thoughts I should keep to myself from here on out on the subject.

I knew Meryem would help him one way or another.

I appreciate that Savas basically knows Meryem did not kill his family as a fact even if she will not confirm it for him yet. The moment Meryem does, my life gets better though.

Finally! I needed Meryem to realize he saved her from the fire before the end of the episode.

I really need a break from people convincing Meryem that bad things are good for her and her falling for it. She is set up in every way all the damn time and she ain't a bad person. We need a break!

Wait... so did the bird die?

[qwsadhfkcgfufd]

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[poemsbypresmei]

A day before I turned 19, I wrote a letter to myself. A year and a day later, I opened it. This is that letter:

July 28, 2019

Dear Kyla Presmei,

Happy 20th Birthday! Time flies, doesn’t it? Don’t be confused by the dates. In case you forgot, this is both your 18-year-old (and soon to be 19-year-old self) wishing you love, joy, and happiness - wherever you are.

When you read this, you’d probably be in college now. Whatever school and program you’re in, I hope you’ll find your passion and calling in there. Just keep on moving forward, okay? I know the journey to be where you are now wasn’t easy. We both had to undergo difficulties and challenges to grow and become who we are today. So, when it feels too much, remember where you’ve been and how far you’ve come. Your family will always be here for you. God will always be here for you. I will be too.

I hope you’d see or think of me fondly, despite all of the flaws I’m sure you’re very aware of. After all, we wouldn’t be who we are without the Kyla’s, the Presmei’s, the KP’s, and the Nene’s in the past. I know it’s still a struggle to love me, to love us, and to embrace our being completely and openly. I’ve struggled with insecurities, self-doubt, and self-loathing. I cried myself to sleep wondering the purpose and meaning of my existence.

Let me tell you something I realized just in the last hours of my existence: you don’t need to have everything figured out. You don’t need to fear failure because failure is not the opposite of success; it is an integral part of it. It’s okay to admit to yourself that you’re imperfect, and you’re only human, and yet, you’re a beautiful, wonderful being full of compassion, sincerity, and love. It’s okay to be both.

Kyla Presmei, thank you for being strong for both of us. Thank you for continuing to be kind, even when life makes it more difficult. When you did something good; when you made a difference in the lives of others and no one knows, I do. More importantly, He does. Thank you for trying your best to be an obedient, loving, understanding daughter. Your friends may not tell you this, but know they’re blessed to have you.

I write this letter because I know you know few rarely do. There are words and wishes you wish to hear from others, but you never receive them. I would argue that perhaps, there is no better person to console and understand your innermost thoughts than yourself.

So, Kyla, if you’re still here, I want you to know I believe in you. Even when you’re at your lowest point, and you’ve sat front row watching all your mistakes and wrong decisions play in real-time, I trust in you. You have the capacity to leave a lasting impression in this world. Let me help you realize it.

Before I wrap up this letter, I’d like to share with you some reminders and well-wishes that transpired within this year to make you feel nostalgic/loved/inspired:

· Your 18th Debut Celebration was one of the best, unforgettable nights of our life. Many cried. Your family and close friends were there in attendance. You sang your original songs “Regina” and “Stand Up.”

· Grade 11 took you (technically) two years but hey, we made it! HUMSS in [redacted Senior High School] was particularly interesting. The first semester was an adjustment period after six months of uncertainty. You made new friends and learned so many things. You’re in a much lively and happier place than before. DL too!

· Writing workshops brought you to the hot seat. You emerged a better writer out of it.

· Your set of close friends are [redacted names to protect their privacy]. I hope there’ll be more (not less), and I hope you’re still on good terms with them.

· Avengers Endgame was awesome.

· Kerygma Conference was eye-opening.

· Your last day as an 18-year-old girl was spent cooking spaghetti (for the first time), and other dishes, and spending time with your parents in [redacted place]. You ate a buffet courtesy of [redacted name of person] (whom you just met!)

There’s more I could have included but have forgotten due to sleepiness (Yeah).

But Kyla, at the end of the day, I hope you’re a happier, more fulfilled person. The right people will come at the right time. The right opportunity will reveal itself when you need it most. And remember:

You’re so much more than warm and kind-hearted, you’re a beautiful person. And for that, I celebrate you on your birthday. (Hallmark; “Between You and Me”)

Again, Happy Birthday.

I love you.

Yours truly,

KP @ 18/19

[onlycags]

Issız Adam (The Man With No Owner)

Word Count: 3,507 Description: Was looking through a list of Turkish nicknames and came across this one and had an idea. A little (ie: tons) of angst thrown in with a little confession/smut at the end. Enjoy xx

- - -

“What about that one, Issız Adam?” You ask Çağlar, pointing toward the girl at the bar who’s just taken a seat. From the back, she looks like she’s his type - ‘breathing’ and, of course, ‘consenting’ eventually if he does take her home - and you bite back the sting of jealousy that threatens to bubble up to the surface, focusing instead on making sure Çağlar knows exactly who you’re gesturing to. You’re slightly drunk and leaning into him, the smell of his cologne burning your nostrils in a way that’s intoxicating and has you wanting to hold onto him and never let him go, but you resist the urge. This is Çağlar, after all: your best friend and womanizer of the century as of late, it seems. 

“Mm, she’s pretty, Tatlı Cadı,” Çağlar muses, his gaze raking over the girl from afar as he takes a slow sip of his beer. His stomach dips as his mouth forms the nickname he’d given you ages ago, loving the way the words slide across his lips. She’s nothing like you, is on the tip of his tongue, but he doesn’t voice the words that he’s certain you’d take the wrong way. The worst would be if he were to voice his feelings like he has before, getting brushed off with a teasing grin and a kiss on his cheek as you reply back ‘I love you, too, Çağlar’ as though the words mean nothing. You were always doing that, saying loving words or touching him in ways he’d deem ‘intimate’ but somehow weren’t with you, and it was eating him alive.

He’d been trying to fuck you out of his thoughts for months now, going home with any and every girl he could find when he was in the mood. Some days, he fucked girls who could be your twin; other times, it was girls who looked nothing like you. You wouldn’t ever leave his head, though, and there were times he would accidentally call girls by your name; the guilt eating him alive far more than their anger at being called another girl’s name. 

You’re pressed into his side, still listing off the reasons Çağlar should go flirt with her. Your flowery perfume is the scent he dreams about but knows he will never have in his bed. Right now, it was you or this girl and Çağlar drained his beer, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand as he set the pint glass on the table and walked determinedly over to the girl at the bar. You watched him go, your eyes glued to the muscles of his back - he was wearing a black Henley that hugged all his muscles in all the right places and made your brain go a bit loopy.

Çağlar was always charming, turning on his bright gap-toothed smile that had every girl you know swooning and you watched this girl at the bar fall under his spell, too. This wasn’t the first time Çağlar had picked a girl up from the bar and left you all alone and it wouldn't be the last; you sent him a ‘have fun’ text that if you were honest you didn’t mean, and headed back home alone to your place.

You woke up alone on Saturday morning, not for the first time. Your head pounded with the hangover you’d given yourself after you’d gone home and drank the six-pack that sat in your fridge and you hated your past self for not leaving out water or pills. “Fuck!” You hissed, dragging yourself into the kitchen to grab something to dull the headache and proceeded to trudge to the shower, hoping the warm water would soothe your aching joints. 

“How’d it go last night?” You asked Çağlar as you answered his FaceTime call almost two hours later, freshly showered and hangover-headache-free.

“Well, she didn’t hate me when I didn’t remember her name in the morning and I didn’t even have to kick her out,” came his smirking reply. 

You laughed and shook your head. “Did she at least leave satisfied, Issız Adam?”

Çağlar pretended to be offended, his voice taking on a ‘duh’ tone as he said, “It’s me, Tatlı Cadı. Of course she did.”

“Oh, God!” Your shoulders shook with laughter and you pressed your palm to your forehead and tried to bury your face in one hand while still holding your phone and FaceTiming Çağlar. “Nothing like a good pre-match fuck for good luck, eh?” 

“Exactly.”

The two of you continued to talk for a bit, confirming plans for the match at the KP later that night - Çağlar had left your ticket at the box office as usual, but you weren’t sure what your plans were for after the match.

You ended the call, both of your hearts heavy with something neither of you thought you could ever have. 

***

You watched Çağlar play, your heart hammering in your chest as he raced around the pitch to defend against Arsenal. It was always stressful, especially when he ended up in a one-v-one challenge with Lacazette as the Arsenal forward took off on a breakaway and Çağlar was the only one near.

Vardy put one in the back of the net in the 80th minute, a scoreless match until then. You were on your feet with the rest of the crowd, cheering on your team with your eyes glued to your best friend. 

When the match was over, you were on the pitch with other players’ friends and family. You hugged Çağlar tightly, hating how hyperaware you were of his body pressed against yours. You always wore his jersey to matches but his name and number had never felt burned into your back like it did now. 

“We’re going out to celebrate,” Cengiz said, a bright smile on his face as he ambled over to you and Çağlar. “Care to join us?”

“Sure,” you said, leaning in to Çağlar who put his arm around your shoulders. “I’ve gotta see Issız Adam’s post-match pick-up skills live and in person.”

“Anything for you, Tatlı Cadı,” Çağlar said, barely resisting the urge to press a kiss to the top of your head. Your stomach dipped at the nickname and you wanted more than anything to be the one he was flirting with at the pub.

An hour later, you were drinking a pint while sandwiched between Çağlar and Harvey Barnes. Harvey was celebrating his assist, tipsy and smiley. He’d been flirting with you all night and you couldn’t deny that you were flirting back. It felt good to talk and laugh and drink and not feel like your heart was going to burst out of its chest with every word you spoke.

Çağlar, on the other hand, was murderous. He’d watched Harvey flirt with you, seeing red whenever you laughed at Harvey’s joke or put a hand on his arm. At one point, you’d pointed out a girl at another table who kept looking at Çağlar; he’d gone over and flirted a bit but she was nowhere near what he wanted tonight, so he’d come back, only to witness Harvey leaning in to whisper something in your ear.

You giggled at whatever Harvey had said, pausing when you saw Çağlar looming over you. You couldn’t stop the shy smile that graced your lips as you tucked a lock of hair behind your ear and asked, “Well? You gonna take her home, Issız Adam?”

Çağlar shook his head. “No. And stop calling me that.”

You laughed, the sound grating on Çağlar’s already-frayed nerves. “Then stop taking every girl with a pulse home and I won’t have to.” The sentence was meant to be teasing, but you couldn’t stop the hint of jealousy that tinged your tone. 

At that moment, Harvey placed a hand on your arm - a gesture that Çağlar didn’t miss. “Do you want to get out of here?” Harvey asked, his voice low, but Çağlar heard his question as though his teammate had shouted it. 

You smiled and nodded and Çağlar’s chest tightened and he saw red for a moment. He didn’t know what to do, rapidly losing his cool. Çağlar didn’t want to get possessive with you or make a scene but it would break him if you went home with Harvey. You seemed to sense that Çağlar was upset about something, stopping Harvey. “Wait for me in the car, Harvey?” You put a hand on Harvey’s cheek and Çağlar clenched his jaw.

Once Harvey was out of the bar, you stood up abruptly and stalked out to the patio area. “What the hell is your problem, Çağlar?!” You hissed, finally turning on him now that it was just the two of you. 

Çağlar didn't speak for a moment, trying to find his words. When he did, his voice was wrecked. “Don’t go home with him.”

You scoffed and rolled your eyes as you crossed your arms. “And just why not, Issız Adam? What gives you the right to go home with people and not me?”

Çağlar got in your face, pressing you between him and the railing. “It’s just different,” was his response.

“That’s all you’ve got?” You challenged, your breathing picking up. “‘It’s just different’ is your only excuse?!”

“Tell me you want to go home with Harvey and I’ll let you go,” Çağlar growled, his hands on your hips. 

“Or? There’s got to be another option here, Çağlar.” You swallowed hard, your gaze searching his. Your voice was barely above a whisper as you asked, “What if I don’t want to go home with Harvey? What if...what if I want to go home with someone else?” Your body was alight with energy and you were more alive than you’d felt in ages, but you needed to hear him say the words you’d wanted him to say for months now. 

“Sikme,” he cursed in Turkish, and a thrill raced through you at hearing him speak his native language that was directed at you. Fuck.

“Çağlar,” you admonished, taking his face in his hands, trying not to cry as you pleaded with him, “If there’s something you’d like to say to me, you should say it now.”

Çağlar struggled, weighing his options. He wasn’t sure if his words would be well-received and he didn’t want you to think he was just saying this to get you to not leave with Harvey. He let out a loud sigh, squeezing his eyes shut. His body relaxed and you put a hand on his bicep as you stepped out of his hold. You thought you were going to cry, but you held yourself together. Çağlar called out your name right before you were about to cross the threshold back into the bar and you stopped and turned around.

“Yes, Çağlar?” You asked, breathless with hope.

“Have fun.”

***

Harvey could tell something was off, but he didn’t try to get you to talk. “Can you just, um, take me home?” You asked, trying to hold onto your last bit of sanity so you didn’t start crying. 

“Yeah, I can do that,” Harvey said softly, letting you give him directions back to your place. “Some other time, eh?”

“Yeah.” You gave him a small smile that he returned and a half-hour later, you were at your place, your nerves raw and shot. 

***

Training the next morning was full of teasing, the guys giving Harvey shit for getting to take you home the night before. The only one not joining in was Çağlar, his stance and overall mood sour. He barely acknowledged Harvey unless it was on the pitch, waiting until it was just him and Harvey in the changing room after training. 

“So, how was she?” Çağlar asked, unable to keep the sneer out of his voice.

“Cags, look, mate-”

Before Harvey could say another word, Çağlar had him slammed up against the wall, one arm across Harvey’s chest. “Did you fuck her?! Did you fuck my girl?!”

“N-No!” Harvey stuttered, shaking his head rapidly. “I didn’t know the two of you were together, I swear!”

Çağlar sighed, shaking his head. “We’re not,” he said, his voice tortured. “But I’d like to be.”

Harvey softened his tone at Çağlar’s confession. “Nothing happened, Cags, I swear. She was pretty shaken up when she got in the car and she asked me to take her home. I didn’t even kiss her good night. I promise.”

Çağlar stepped back, sighing as he ran a hand through his hair. Without another word, he turned and stormed out of the changing rooms, determined to make things right.

The knock at your door was unwelcome and you sighed angrily as you got up from your comfortable spot on the couch to go answer it. You gasped in surprise as you saw Çağlar on the other end of your door, your heart racing. “Çağlar?” You asked as you opened the door, the butterflies erupting in your stomach as he stormed in, looking angry. “What’s wrong?”

“Did you sleep with Harvey last night?” Çağlar asked, his gaze piercing you. 

“No, I didn’t,” you whispered, stepping towards him. “I couldn’t sleep with him.”

“Why not?”

You stopped so there were only centimetres between you and Çağlar. With a shaking hand, you reached out and placed a hand on his chest. His heart was beating rapidly underneath your fingertips and you couldn’t stop the way your breath audibly hitched at the feeling. “Why do you care, Issız Adam?”

“Tatlı Cadı,” he growled, pinning you against the wall, “I told you not to call me that anymore.”

“Why?” You retorted, breathless. “It’s the truth, isn’t it? The man without an owner? That’s you - you can’t deny it.”

“What if I already have an owner but she doesn’t know she owns my heart?” His breathing was ragged and his expression was so tortured you thought he was going to cry. He dropped his head in the crook of your neck, his lips barely brushing the skin on your collarbone as he spoke again. “I’ve been trying for months to fuck you out of my system. You’re in my head, Tatlı Cadı, and I can’t get you out.” Goosebumps broke out on your skin at his nickname and you shivered. “Fuck, you smell so good,” he whispered, inhaling. “I’ve been dreaming about what it’d be like to wake up with that scent on my sheets.”

His name was a broken two syllables on your tongue. Instinctively, your hand that was still on his chest slid up to wrap around the back of his neck and your other hand went to his side. “Please don’t say that unless you really mean it,” you murmured as Çağlar lifted his head to look at you. 

“I mean it,” he said, resting his forehead against yours as he swallowed hard. “I wanted to tell you last night but I was scared that you wouldn’t believe me, that you would think that I was only saying it so you wouldn’t leave with Harvey last night.”

“I’ve been jealous,” you confessed, your fingers playing absently with the hair on his neck. “I’ve watched you fuck every girl who wasn’t me for months and every time you left with someone and I went home alone, wishing you’d been leaving with me. When Harvey wanted me to go home with him last night, I couldn’t say no. Why should I believe what you’re saying now?”

“I’m done talking,” Çağlar rasped, taking your face in his hands. “I can leave or I can stay and kiss you - your choice.”

“Kiss me, Çağlar. Please.”

“Nasıl istersen, Tatlı Cadı.” As you wish, sweet witch.

Time stopped the moment Çağlar’s lips met yours. You’d both wanted this for so long, your mouths meeting in a clash that left you wanting more. Çağlar’s hands were everywhere on your body, exploring it in ways he’d only dreamed of until now. Your own hands were reaching for the hem of his t-shirt and Çağlar let out a moan as your fingertips brushed across his skin. Çağlar broke the kiss so you could take off his shirt and toss it on the ground; your own shirt following seconds later. Çağlar trailed kisses down your neck, one hand unhooking your bra and the other cupping your bare breasts when he was done. 

“So beautiful,” he murmured, pressing kisses to the tops of each one before taking one pert nipple in his mouth. You let out a needy whine, arching your back to give him better access as both your hands tangled in his hair. 

“Çağlar!” Your whimpers mixed in with the sounds of him sucking and kissing your tits, the sensations going straight to your clit and soaking your panties. “Please!”

“Gonna take my time with you, Tatlı Cadı,” Çağlar promised in-between kisses, walking you to your bedroom. “I’ve had months to fantasize about what I wanna do with you and I intend to take my time.” He laid you down on the bed, covering your torso with kisses as he made his way down to the waistband of your shorts. He hooked his fingers in the sides, taking your panties down with them. You thrashed about on the bed, your fingers fisting into the sheets as the cool air hit your dripping pussy. Çağlar fixed his gaze on your pussy like you were breakfast and he was starving. He stopped to pull the bobble off his wrist and tie back his hair, licking his lips as he settled back between your legs. “You gonna let me taste you?”

“Y-Yes, Çağlar,” you said, nodding your head. That was all it took and Çağlar’s mouth was on your pussy, his fingers digging into the flesh of your ass as he pulled you toward him and buried his face in your cunt. Your toes curled and your back arched as Çağlar licked and sucked your juices, making you feel good. 

Çağlar couldn’t believe he had you like this; hearing you moan his name was better than he’d ever dreamt of. Four fingers tugged at his hair, the painful sensations only adding to his pleasure as he plunged two fingers inside your dripping pussy. 

Your first orgasm was intense, Çağlar’s name on your lips as you bucked your hips and humped his face. He looked up at you as you caught your breath, his teasing smirk that much hotter with his face coated in your juices. You leaned back on your elbows, giving him a look as you reached for him. “Kiss me.” The taste of your pussy was intoxicating and you reached down to grasp Çağlar’s shaft, giving him a few pumps. He moaned in your mouth and you couldn’t help the smile that graced your lips. 

“Let me return the favour,” you whispered, trailing kisses down his collarbone and sternum, putting your hands on his body wherever you could. 

A groan ripped from Çağlar’s lips as you started to work him over. Your pride swelled at the knowledge that you were the one making him feel this good, reveling in the way his fingers tangled in your hair and he moaned your name. 

Çağlar knew when he was about to cum, staving off his orgasm and pulling out of your mouth. You gave him an indignant look, but Çağlar was quick to react, turning you over on your stomach and grabbing your hips. Without another word, he was sinking into you, both of you letting out a moan at the feeling of him finally inside you. He pumped in and out of you slowly, letting you get used to his size and girth and the way your pussy stretched to accommodate him. 

“Fuck, you feel so good,” he hissed, biting down on your shoulder. You whimpered, the onslaught of sensations overwhelming you and it wasn’t much longer until you were cumming again, this time around his cock. Çağlar sagged against you when he was done, his cum coating your inner walls. 

The two of you cuddled in bed after he’d pulled out of you and cleaned you up, Çağlar whispering sweet nothings to you in Turkish that you couldn’t really understand but sent shivers down your spine. 

“I’ve wanted this for so long,”  he murmured out of the blue, pressing a kiss into your hair.

“Me, too,” you sighed, snuggling closer as you hooked your leg over his hip. You lightly kissed the centre of his chest, an action so minute you didn’t think much of it - it was as if you’d been doing it forever - loving the way you could finally show your affection for him so outwardly. “You’re not gonna make me kick you out in the morning or forget my name, are you?” You asked, trying to joke but it didn't quite land, the insecurity making your voice wobble. 

Çağlar squeezed you tightly, tilting your chin up so that he was forcing you to look at him. “Absolutely not. You’re the one that I want, Tatlı Cadı. Sadece sen.” Only you.

[kprciffdw]

Ratchet and Kim Possible Chronicles: The Solanian Revolution-Finale

They arrived at the Planet Koros. As soon as they landed, they spotted the Biobliterator. Kim: "Look! There it is!" Ratchet: "Yeah, that's it, alright." Ron: "So…how are we going to bring down that evil machine?" Ratchet: "Good question, Ron. None of my weapons would even put a dent in that thing." Clank: "Hm…perhaps a much larger form of weaponry will get the job done." Ron: "And where are we going to find that?"

Clank looked around for a bit, he then spotted a massive Ion Cannon. Clank: "How about that?"

Ratchet, Kim and Ron looked over and spotted that cannon as well. Kim: "Uh…that'll do." Clank: "If you could get me inside the command center, I can override the targeting system and take control of that Ion Cannon." Kim: "Sounds like a plan." Ratchet: "Come on, let's hurry before that Biobliterator leaves for Veldin."

The entire group rushed off. They scurried through the entire area as fast as they could, fighting through one robot hoard after another. There was no doubt that the area was heavily guarded. The fight was intense, they knew that their enemies were really going all out, but so were they. There were always new surprises around every corner, they couldn't let their guard down, even for a second. They kept going until they were able to reach the massive cannon. There, Clank gained access to the cannon's controls. Directly next to him was a screen displaying Nefarious' transmission. Dr. Nefarious: "Agent Clank?"

Clank aimed for the Biobliterator. Dr. Nefarious: "What's going on here? What are you doing?" Ron: "Go for it, Clank!" Clank: "After all those Holo-films, there is one thing you should know by now: do not mess with Agent Clank."

And with that, Clank shot at the Biobliterator and blew it up completely. Nefarious shouted out in anger. Ron: "Alright, Clank!" Kim: "Way to go!" Ratchet: "That's the way to do it!" Clank: "Incoming call from the Phoenix."

Displayed on the monitor was Sasha. Sasha: "Nice shooting, Clank. There's no telling how many people you just saved." Kim: "All in a day's work." Sasha: "But it's still not over." Ron: "Aw, man! We're still not done yet?" Kim: "Of course, just when you think it's this easy, a much harder challenge comes around." Ron: "That entire run through was easy!?" Kim: "Obviously not, but blowing up the Biobliterator was." Ron: "Oh! Right, yeah, that was the easy part." Sasha: "Al just finished decoding the data disk. Nefarious secretly constructed a second Biobliterator, a new model that's even more dangerous than the one you just destroyed."

Just then, the Kimmunicator went off. Kim pulled it out. Wade: "I'm afraid it gets even worse. After finding out about that Biobliterator, I was able to locate it and scan its power. From what I was able to find, it's very powerful, those devices that I built will have very little immunity to that massive machine." Ratchet: "Where is it, Wade?" Sasha: "Nefarious has a master control center on Planet Mylon. Wade was able to confirm it being there, guarded by an entire robot army." Kim: "And here I thought the stakes were raised to the max on this planet." Wade: "I have also confirmed that Nefarious is also there from the tracking device you guys had placed on him." Ratchet: "Then we had better get moving." Sasha: "Be careful, guys. This time, they know you're coming." Kim: "Doesn't matter; we're so ready for them."

They left the cannon and rushed back towards the ship as fast as they could then left for Mylon.

They arrived at the Planet Mylon. They landed and got out of the ship then looked out at the entire facility. Ratchet: "This is it, guy; the final confrontation. Are you ready?" Kim: "Oh, I know I am." Ron: "So am I." Clank: "Yes, let us put a stop to this once and for all." Ratchet: "OK, then, let's go."

They ran out towards the facility as fast as they could. Along the way, they ran into lots of robotic Tyhrranoids. They were indeed a lot tougher than their organic former and then some. A few times, they needed to use Wade's newly modified Holo-Tyhrranoid to get through.

It was a tough fight through and through which indeed lasted throughout the entire area, perhaps their toughest fight yet, which is to be expected. This time, they really needed to work together. It was truly a matter of deciding the fate of the Solona Galaxy and there really was no room for errors.

They were eventually able to reach Nefarious and the Biobliterator, but he warped out before they even had the chance to react. Ratchet: "(grunt) Dang it! We're too late!"

The Biobliterator flew off. Dr. Nefarious: "(laugh) Dah! Lawrence! Get this thing off of me!" Kim: "We have to go after him."

Just then, one of the drop ships arrived and opened up. Sasha transmitted to them. Kim: "Sasha!" Sasha: "Get in!"

The group ran into the drop ship, it flew off. It took them to a far off small group of islands. As they were arriving, the drop ship opened up. They spotted the Biobliterator below them. Al: "There it is! Nefarious already initiated the launch sequence. If that thing gets into space, Veldin won't stand a chance!" Ratchet: "That's not gonna happen!" Kim: "Not if we have anything to say about this!" Ron: "So…are we going to land or do we have to…"

Kim grabbed Ron by his shirt collar and jumped out of the drop ship along with Ratchet. They were free-falling all the way down, with Ron screaming all the way.

They managed to descend to where they stood before Nefarious. He took notice of them immediately. Dr. Nefarious: "What!? You guys again!?" Kim: "It's over, Nefarious, we're putting an end to your evil plans right here, right now!" Ratchet: "That's right!" Dr. Nefarious: "(growl) You miserable brats! You will pay for your insolence!"

Just then, Ratchet pulled out his wrench and tossed it at Nefarious, he dodged it and it struck a control console, destroying it. Ratchet: "Sorry, Nefarious, your flight's been canceled."

Nefarious screamed in anger and was shocked again by the shock emitter. He reached out from behind him, grabbed it and with great force, was able to remove it then tossed it at the group. They were able to dodge, except for Ron. It almost hit him but Rufus was able to catch it. Rufus: "Ta-da!" Kim: "That's fine. We don't need that thing anymore, anyway. We're bringing you down right here." Ratchet: "Although Wade did enjoy hearing you scream and gripe every single time the shock emitter went off."

Nefarious tried to call for Lawrence again but all he got was a voicemail. So he proceeded to fight the entire group himself. The fight was short and seemed a bit too easy. After the brief fight, Nefarious fell to his knees. Dr. Nefarious: "I am defeated! I have no choice but to throw myself of your mercy." Kim: "Wow, that was easy." Ratchet: "Huh, who knew? I mean, uh, that's right, Nefarious! Your reign of terror is finally…"

But then, Nefarious lifted himself off the ground and flew away. Dr. Nefarious: "Suckers!"

The group was caught off guard. Ratchet growled in anger. Kim: "Figures. It's hardly ever this easy."

Ron ran after Nefarious. Ron: "Get back here, Nefarious!" Rufus: "Nefarious!" Kim: "Ron!"

Kim ran off, Ratchet followed. Ratchet: "Save me some of the action, Ron!"

They chased Nefarious out into a massive field. They fought several more robots as they continued their fight against Nefarious. The mad robot shot out a devastating laser at them several times during the fight. They soon ran over a massive bridge towards another island as they continued to chase him down. They fought more robots as they ran across. Soon enough, the Galactic Rangers arrived to help out with the fight. The group seemed very pleased to see them, but they knew they had to keep going.

They were eventually able to catch up with Nefarious. He brought forth one devastating assault after another. He was seriously not going easy on him, but the group also put forth a really tough fight. Within a good amount of time, they were able to bring him down.

After being brought down by the group, he called for Lawrence again, who came this time. He ordered Lawrence to "begin the transformation" and with one click of a remote, the Biobliterator transformed into a massive mecha. The group stood by, surprised as this was occurring. Nefarious and Lawrence warped into the mech and began shooting at the group. Just then, Qwark came flying in on his shuttle, much to everyone's surprise. Kim: "Qwark?" Ron: "I don't believe it! Qwark actually came!" Ratchet: "We're not going to be able to defeat that thing on the ground. It's time to take to the skies." Kim: "You go ahead, Ron and I will handle the rest of these robots from here." Ron: "We are?" Ratchet: "OK. Kim? Be careful." Kim: "You, too, Ratchet. Return to us safely." Ratchet: "I will."

He got into a craft and took to the skies. 

He and Qwark worked together to take down the mech. It was indeed a very tough battle and the mech was very, very durable. It took them a while of shooting at the mech, but they were able to bring it down. Nefarious, grief-ridden from being defeated, had Lawrence warp him out before the Biobliterator exploded.

After the fight, Ratchet returned to the ground and reunited with Kim and Ron. They celebrated their victory together. Qwark watched them from above and then flew off. They looked up at Qwark and watched as he was flying away. Ron: "I can't believe Qwark came out of hiding and helped us to beat that thing." Kim: "I know. That's…very shocking." Ratchet: "Thanks, Qwark. You did more than I expected you to."

Later on, Ratchet, Clank and all of their friends attended a star-studded premiere of the latest Secret Agent Clank film. Kim and Ron, however, sat out of it because they refused to see another holo-film until Ratchet is to be placed on a better role. Instead, they sat together someplace nearby. Ron: "This has been some adventure, hasn't it, KP?" Kim: "I'll say it has. We get to go back into space, visit another galaxy, meet all kinds of strange, new aliens and most of all, see Ratchet again." Ron: "Yeah…so…KP…about you and Ratchet. I was wondering something." Kim: "What? What about me and Ratchet?" Ron: "Do you still…you know…like him?" Kim: "Of course I like him. He's a great guy. He's fearless, quick on his feet, an excellent pilot, a really good mechanic and a really great fighter. I've never met anyone like him before. He's…all around amazing." Ron: "Yes, all of that is true, but do you still…really like him, like as in really, really like him?" Kim: "Ron, what are you getting at? I don't know why…wait a minute, are you asking me if…I'm still in love with him? Like seriously? Ron, I already told you, we talked about this. We decided to not have a serious relationship with each other." Ron: "But why not? The both of you had a good thing going on. Why the sudden change? It is because you think it's wrong to be dating a space alien or someone who's a completely different species from you? Is that it?"

Kim sat by and hesitated for a bit, she then turned her head away and looked down. Kim: "It's just…it just…seems strange for me to be going out with someone who isn't a human being. Yes, I like him and we care about each other a lot but…I just don't want to be seen as a weirdo for dating a space alien." Ron: "So what? Why should you even care about people that see you as a weirdo for that? They don't know you and Ratchet for who you guys really are. You still have feelings for him! I know that! You can still be with him regardless of what either of you are. Don't let anyone stand in the way of that!"

Kim looked back at him for a few moments, then looked away again. Kim: "I…I'm just not sure…I can…besides…he…he's probably let go of his feelings for me…so…I should move on…"

Ron looked at her, sad.

Later afterwards, Ratchet and Clank had dinner with Kim, Ron, Wade and the Possibles in the ISSF to celebrate the victory against Dr. Nefarious. They ate, chatted, laughed and had an over all good time. The twins and Wade spent more time observing Clank. He seemed much less uncomfortable with them as he began to enjoy being with them. They were able to stop observing him as some amazing, alien robot that had intrigued them so much and start seeing him as a friend. Ratchet spent some time chatting with Kim and her parents for a good bit of time. They were then planning to return to Earth. Ratchet and Clank said their goodbyes before leaving to go back to the Phoenix. From the starship, Ratchet watched as the ISSF left the galaxy and returned to Earth. He had a huge smile on his face as he continued looking out the window. Ratchet: "See you again…Kimberly."

                                                   The End

[jcmorrigan]

NINE FAVORITE TELEVISION SHOWS IN POSTERS

Got tagged by @gavillain​ again for favorite shows in posters, and this one, the challenge was narrowing them down. I can’t even name HMs because there are too fucking many but anyway, here’s a rundown

1. I think RWBY is my biggest consistent favorite. It grabbed my attention right away upon debut and is only growing stronger and stronger. Listen, if I don’t just throw a bitch tantrum and stop liking something the moment it kills off my favorite villain, you KNOW it’s good stuff, and my boi was dead five volumes ago. Anyway, if you’ll pardon me, I have to go sob in the corner over Qrow and Clover for another thirty minutes, THEY DESERVED SO MUCH BETTERRRRRRR

2. Big Hero 6 is the only other long-running current show that I can really say I’ve committed to whole hog. It’s EXACTLY my brand, which is weird in this day and age. It seems like as things shuffle the idea of “villain of the week” to the back, this is the one series that’s just like “No, let’s give our plucky heroes development by pitting them against a rotating deck of familiar foes.” But really, I can’t just say this without explaining that it feels like a revival of...

3. The more I go on, the more I realize that even if I don’t talk about it, Kim Possible changed me as a human being. My early relationship with villains was...weird. Too long of a story for here. But KP offered me a constant plate of fun baddies I could enjoy without strings. You can tell by now I’m also one for wacky comedy and bold young heroes learning about themselves as they save the world, and those can both be traced right back here.

4. The Huntsman put his blade to my throat and demanded I include American Dragon: Jake Long here. But no, as a young mythology buff, I was captivated by this show’s wide catalog of multicultural magical creatures and creative ways to implement fantasy elements and high stakes into yet another high school coming-of-age comedy.

5. Okay I’m CHEATING because Epithet Erased isn’t technically a show-show but I wanted to include it. Despite certain DRAMA I’VE HAD in this fandom (only ask if you REALLY want to know), I keep coming back to this cast and wanting to declare them all my children. Let Giovanni adopt Molly 2k21. Let Mera have a prison break 2k21. Let me marry Giovanni 2krightfuckingnow. Also this is the kind of off-the-wall humor that I can’t even deal with (”Please, call me Indus. Mr. Barrier is my Epithet!”).

6. BUT IF YOU WANNA TALK ABOUT LOVE-HATE RELATIONSHIPS - My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic took a huge dive after S4, and as for the fanbase...uh...we’ll just...we’ll just leave that one alone because it’s way too much to unpack. But even if I did go through several years’ worth of feeling sour on Discord because of That Redemption Arc, he still remains one of my ultimate favorite villains. The girls are a road map for how I want my perfect hero team. And the entire setting is just filled with so much magic and color.

7. Storm Hawks might be one of the fastest binges I’ve ever done in my life because I had to have more. This turned out to be a mistake because the ep “Payback” was extremely triggering and never fucking got followed up on and I just blazed through without processing, but I’ve since made my peace with it. It’s got more unconventional fantasy/sci-fi worldbuilding, and though every stock trope you can imagine is here, that’s what makes it a good comfort series. Sometimes you don’t have to reinvent the wheel; you just need to see the bumbling comedic egomaniac learn humility in a series of madcap shenanigans with pirates. Also: STORK, MY DUDES

8. Mozenrath. Mozenrath, Mozenrath. Mozenrath Mozenrath Mozenrath; Mozenrath. Ayam Aghoul.

9. I intentionally put Gotham last because I wanted you all to read through eight posters of brightly-colored animated series and then crash into it. But the thing is, and I wanna do a longer meta post on this someday, even though Gotham has a noir aesthetic and heavy subject matter, it’s a series for adults that doesn’t forget what we loved about superhero shows as kids. Flamboyant villains of the week, heroes who really try their best, a dash of zany character-driven humor, relationships filled with heart, epic villain team-ups, over-the-top climaxes. Even though this series had its weak points, such as the Galavan arc and all the stuff surrounding Ra’s (though that latter one is more of a matter of opinion), I feel like it ended so strong that it stands out almost as a perfect series to me. In a world where our favorite long-running series just seem to refuse to resolve in a satisfying manner, THIS IS THE ONE that ties up all the plots in the end - the will-they-or-won’t-they straight couple ties the knot, the gay villains go as gay as they can possibly be under contract and FINALLY make peace with each other, the character I thought was absolutely the weakest in S1 managed to loop from sucky hero to badass villain to sassy antihero, you get ONE OF *THOSE* ENDINGS WHERE THE MAIN HEROES AND MAIN VILLAINS TEAM UP TO HOLD THE LINE AGAINST A BIGGER THREAT, I just - I’m not over it and I won’t be. Though the fact that not a single S4 poster I found had the entire J-Squad on it? BOO, YOU WHORES

Tagging no one. Do if you want

[sharperthewriter]

Chapter 16 of SFV

Chapter 16 - Day 2: The Hailstorm

(still Nov. 19, 10:45pm)

The Stoppable-mobile pulled back to the hotel as the gravy-soaked Kim parked it in the parking spot and putting it in gear.

"Ron, we are going to leave early tomorrow." Kim said, hiding her frustrations on how Day 1 of the vacation went.

"How early are we talking about, KS?" Ron asked.

"We are talking super early, like, at 8am. So I want everyone to be up by 5:30am." Kim instructed her family. "Is that clear?"

"Yes, ma'am!" came the unison reply from the other three Stoppable family members. Rufus also nodded his head.

"What about Mary and Canna?" Ron asked, pointing to the camper.

"I will have to keep a close eye on them, especially Canna." Kim said as she unbuckled her seat belt. She got out of the van, followed by Ron, Rufus, and the kids.

As they closed the doors to the Stoppable-mobile. Ron was then reminded of something.

"Oh, Kim! I forgot that I dropped my set of keys in the car." he said while walking back to the van.

Kim then remembered that the driver's door lock was rendered useless due to the fact that she used her GJ-issue laser lipstick on the vehicle earlier to rescue Justin.

Turning behind, Kim exclaimed, "Ron! Don't open the car! You might activate the..."

And as Ron opened the door, loud noises emitted from the Stoppable-mobile.

"...car alarm!" Kim groaned at Ron's forgetfulness. He had activated the worst part of the vehicle.

The alarm was so loud that it even awoke some of the other hotel guests who were sleeping.

"Can you shut the damn thing up?" one female guest asked. "It's annoying!"

"I'm trying to sleep here!" exclaimed a male guest from the second floor.

Kim replied to the guests while covering her ears. The other Stoppables, plus Mary and Canna, also did the same. Canna was also chewing on tobacco and spitting it out in her empty water bottle.

"Don't worry! I'll get to it!"

She took a baseball bat that they packed for Justin to play with at the Lipskys and started to beat on the hood, for that was where the alarm was it. This motion caused the right strap of her leather overalls to slip from her shoulder again

"Shut the hell up, you stupid damn alarm!" Kim shouted, hammering at least five dents in the hood and in the quarter fender before it finally stopped. A distant thunder was heard.

"Thank you!" the redhead exclaimed, taking a deep breath. Seeing that the right strap has slipped off again, Kim decided not to fight it and unhooked the overalls strap instead.

"Now...if you don't mind, I'm going to get the lemon squares that Ron made for the Thanksgiving dinner for the Lipskys into the suite's fridge." Kim replied, getting Nana's most important, and treasured, heirloom from the van and into her hotel room. There were 16 lemon squares total that she had brought in.

"I got the keys, KS!" Ron exclaimed while grabbing his keys and closed the door to the van.

"Now...let's all get back to sleep and have a peaceful sleepy night!" she then insisted to the guests. They all turned out their lights.

Thunder also began to rumble , closer to their area.

(11:30pm)

After taking a shower, Kim was now finally out of her gravy-colored overalls and shirt and now in her husband's Middleton High football jersey that barely covered her breasts and Club Banana boxers. She only had panties underneath the boxers and was wearing her glasses. This was considered her usual night wear.

The kids, in the meantime, were asleep on the pullout couch as was Rufus.

She was also playing on her tablet while watching an old episode of the Dr. Zone Files on the TV. It was the episode where Time Ape was captured by the Statues of Windsor, where one looked at them, they would become frozen forever.

This was when she got out her KP Kimmunicator Pendant to get with Wade. The now 22-year old tech whiz of Team Delta at Global Justice appeared in a hologram form.

"Hey, Kim!" he said with a smile, "It's getting kinda late here."

"Hey, Wade! I know." Kim said with a smile, "How's Ken holding down the fort?" She was speaking of one of her fellow team-mates on the Team Delta squad, Ken Trepid.

"Him? He's doing fine! Stopped a few robberies with the help of Slam." Wade replied with a smile. How's the first day of the Stoppable vacation?"

Kim groaned, "Ugh...here's my verdict on this sitch!" She then gave a thumbs down.

"Stoppable Vacation Curse got in the way?" she asked.

"So far, Ron almost accidentally locked Justin in the van...again..., we had bird poop on the van, plus the quote-en-quote fun times with the Bumblebees thing of me ripping my overalls, and us getting banned from the local Smarty-mart here due to crazy vegans that we have as relatives!" Kim explained all of the incidents they've had on Day 1 of the trip.

"Not a very good start, huh?" Wade replied with compassion, "Hopefully, things'll get better! I'll catch you up in a couple of days."

"Okay, Wade, get some rest now." Kim suggested.

"Oh, and one other thing and don't tell anyone this but...I got a special surprise for Joss when we get to the Lipskys." Wade said with a whisper, "But don't let her know about it!"

"Lips are so zipped!" Kim said while zipping her lips with her fingers.

"Night, Kim!" Wade said as the hologram of him disappeared.

Ron, in his pajamas and bunny slippers, looked out the window.

"This doesn't look good, KS." he said.

"What is it this time, Ron?" Kim asked, rolling her eyes.

"The storm's on the horizon!" Ron replied, "You might wanna check the NWS."

Kim checked the NWS on her tablet. There was a lot of orange and red headed towards North Platte.

"Ewwww..." she remarked, "...you're right on that front."

"Should we warn the kids?" Ron asked.

"Yeah, I think we should if a Severe Thuderstorm Warning or, God forbid, a Tornado Warning is issued!" Kim said,. "Alexa is much more scared of even regular thunderstorms than Justin is. So I'd hate to see how she fares with this sitch of a storm."

"I understand, KS." Ron replied before switching to the other important thing. "What are we going to do for breakfast though?"

Kim simply pulled out the hotel info and said, "The hotel has a restaurant on the premises that opens up at 6. We can eat the buffet there and then check out at 8. Simple!"

"You make everything sound so easy!" Ron replied, cracking a smile.

"I do, Ron!" Kim giggled. She also got out her planner and stylus pen. "Now...how should I wear my overalls for tomorrow?"

"Which ones are you going to wear?" Ron questioned Kim's denim fashion sense.

"The Club Banana flare ones." Kim replied.

"What is the difference between those and the baggy ones you packed?" Ron asked.

"Two reasons, Ron." Kim said. "The first is that they have the zippers on the side instead of the side buttons and the second is that, if I do wear them with the bib down, which I certainly will, they won't fall down on me as long as the zippers stay up unlike the baggy ones which require a belt."

"I'd say to go with the one-strap up approach." Ron replied.

"And then..." he smirked, playfully lowering his wife's boxers, "...go for both!"

"And I have the perfect way to style a button-down shirt to go along with it!" Kim replied with a grin.

"What about the Oh Boyz Concert?" Ron asked.

"Oh that? I'm definitely going with a belt for that one!" Kim said. "That's the one I planned to wear the manipulated buckles one."

"Good thing that I didn't get the lowest score in the Oh-Boyz challenge!" Ron chortled.

"Jason is gonna be the unlucky one who has to stare at Tara's bare ass for that moment once they get on the stage." Kim grinned.

"The poor, poor sap!" Ron snorted at the fate of his ex-Mad Dog football team-mate.

Kim looked at the alarm clock and it read 11:50pm.

"We gotta get to bed now, Ron." she said, resting her head on the pillow. "We got a long drive ahead of us tomorrow."

"Way ahaead of ya, Kim!" Ron replied, doing the same.

Kim turned out the lights and both the hero duo...and husband and wife...closed their eyes and went to sleep.

(12:45am)

A sudden thud was heard from the ceiling above. And then another...and another...and another! The thunder was booming loudly and lightning flashed from their window.

This woke Ron up from his sleep. Kim, however, was still deeply asleep.

"Huh...what's going on here?" he asked half-groggily. Ron's eyes were half-asleep. "Has Mr. Barkin been turned into a gill monster?"

Rufus was also stirred awake by the storm. At the time, he was the only one that was fully alert and awake. He was chittering loudly in fear to his owner.

"Rufus...the Bueno Nacho dining room is closed at this time." Ron muttered, "Can't you go back to sleep?"

Rufus grunted and pointed to a blaring message on his smart phone. He pointed to the obvious red glaring message on it.

Ron grabbed his smartphone and, all of a sudden, his eyes were wide awake.

"KS! KS! Wake up now!" he exclaimed, rushing to his wife's side of the hotel bed.

"Ron...why are you up?" Kim uttered, "It's almost 1 in the morning...go to bed?"

"How can I go to bed when we got a TORNADO WARNING!" Ron screamed the last two words.

Kim was jolted awake by what her husband said and exclaimed, "Oh my God! Ron! We have to The kids!

The thunder and hail was getting to be louder and louder. Justin and Alexa rushed into their parents room.

"Mommy! Daddy!" Alexa exclaimed in tears, "The thunder monster is out there!"

"I'm totally scared!" Justin whimpered.

"Everyone! To the bathroom!" Kim exclaimed, pointing at the bathroom, the only interior area of their hotel room without any windows.

Ron grabbed his smartphone and he, his wife, Rufus, and the Stoppable kids all scurried into the hotel bathroom.

He tapped his phone on the Tornado Warning issued for the NWS.

"The NWS has issued a Tornado Warning for the counties of Lincoln and Perkins counties until 1:45am. At 12:29am, a severe thunderstorm capable of producing a tornado was spotted about 10 miles south of North Platte moving northeast at 40 mph. This storm is also capable of producing baseball-sized hail..."

"Wait..." Kim gasped. "...baseball-sized hail?!"

"That's what the report said, KS." Ron said while pointing to the report.

"Oh great..." Kim muttered, "We're going to have to check on the damage of the Stoppable-mobile once all this stuff passes."

All the Stoppables could do was to sigh in despair as the sheets of rain and hail continued to pound against the hotel, and against their poor 20-year plus old minivan.

It wasn't until around 2:30am that the storm finally subsided and the Stoppable family can finally return to their beds.

[indescribablechoices]

stay the course

Pairing: Damien Nazario x MC (Kai Park), discussions of past Hayden x MC and suggestive beginnings of Damien x MC x Hayden

Word Count: 1686

Listening Suggestion: Walking The Wire - Imagine Dragons

Fic Tag List: @brightpinkpeppercorn @kennaxval

Synopsis: On the flight from Tokyo to San Francisco, Damien and Hayden take a moment to talk and clear the air for the first time since everything happened with Eros. Bonding and fluff ensue. (this is written with Kai who broke up with Hayden in Berlin and immediately got with Damien, and then my ass fell in love with Hayden in book two so we’re rolling with it)

“Mind if I…?”

Damien glanced up at the sound of Hayden’s voice, removing the headphones to the terrible action movie he’d been watching, “Uh, sure.”

Hayden slid into the empty seat beside him, “Kai’s sat in my seat with Sloane. They’re apparently premiering Tender Nothings on this flight and they wanted to watch it together.” A smile played on his mouth, “She didn’t want to leave you on your own so I promised I’d keep an eye on you.”

Damien laughed softly to himself, “She never changes.”

“No she doesn’t,” Hayden said, almost wistfully, “Look, can we… talk?”

“Isn’t that what we’re already doing?” Damien’s eyebrow raised slightly and Hayden gave him a look.

“We haven’t had a chance to actually talk since… well…”

“That night in Nadia’s apartment,” Damien said.

Hayden gave a nod, “Yeah pretty much. And a lot has changed since then.”

“I’ll say,” Damien said quietly then let out a sigh, his expression turning serious, “You’re right. A lot has changed, and not just with the whole Eros situation. I… I never intended to come between you and Kai.”

“I know,” Hayden said, “She told me what happened that night, with your file. That couldn’t have been easy having it come out like that… Though none of us apart from Kai were surprised.”

“What?”

A soft chuckle left Hayden’s mouth, “I’m not blind, Damien. I knew the first night I met you that you had feelings for her. Everyone could see it, apart from her.”

“Well, shit,” Damien sighed, “I thought I was at least subtle about it.”

Hayden offered him a smile, “You weren’t. But I didn’t think any less of you for it. I wasn’t even jealous of your relationship until…”

“Until Berlin?” Damien offered.

Hayden nodded slightly, “The flight to Berlin mostly. I was so stuck in my headspace about finding out what I was that I couldn’t be there for her, but you could, and you were. You held her, and comforted her, and made sure she was okay.”

“I think everyone can give you a pass for that evening, that was some heavy stuff you were getting your head around,” he pointed out.

“Maybe, but no matter what’s been thrown our way, you’ve always been able to look after her. I know she doesn’t need looking after, the woman’s a force of damn nature,” a comment which made them both crack a smile, “But she needs you, Damien, in a way she’ll never need me.”

“Hayden…” Damien said quietly, but Hayden kept speaking.

“Ever since she lost you she… She hasn’t been the same. Her sole and complete focus was you. Finding you, getting you home; back to her. She was inconsolable the first few days. She’d convinced herself that you had died when we destroyed the Eros facility. She thought that she’d killed you, and then to have Dames there following us around like a ghost… Then she found out you were alive, and it was all that drove her. Nadia and I had to force her to eat and sleep to make sure that she kept her strength up.”

Damien shook his head to himself, “She wouldn’t be Peanut if she wasn’t so damn stubborn… But thank you, Hayden, for taking care of her.”

“Of course.”

“No, I mean it. I can’t imagine any of this has been easy for you, and you’ve been nothing but a good man about it all. Being stuck in that cell, not knowing what was really going on or who else made it or whether I’d ever be free, the only thing that kept me going was the knowledge that you would keep her safe.”

“Always,” Hayden said softly.

Damien met his eyes, “You still love her, don’t you?” Hayden glanced away, only looking back when he felt Damien’s hand on his arm, “Look, I’m not accusing you of anything. I just want to know where things stand.”

Hayden let out a slow breath and relaxed a little back into his seat, “Yeah, I still love her. I think I always will. I was made for her, but ever since that first night; none of it has ever felt programmed. She’s the only real thing I have, and if that is only ever as friendship; then that’s okay. I just want her to be happy, even if it’s not with me.”

Damien nodded slightly, feeling every word of Hayden’s deep in his soul. He had used pretty much the exact same justification to stay with Kai, even though every time he saw her with someone else it pained him.

“Well,” Damien said, sitting up a little in his seat to try and break the almost tense silence that had begun to settle between them, “For whatever it’s worth, I know Kai’s not the only one who’s glad to have you around. You’re a good guy.”

A smile played on Hayden’s mouth, “Yeah? You going soft on me, Nazario?”

Damien gave a laugh, “You wish; I was talking about Sloane.”

“Sure,” Hayden smiled, “And for whatever it’s worth, it’s good to have you back… and not just for Kai.”

Their eyes met for a moment and there was a shared moment of respect and the beginnings of an actual friendship.

They spoke for a little while longer about the plan once they arrived in San Francisco before Damien offered Hayden one of his earphones and the pair of them leaned in to watch the end of the action movie Damien had been watching; laughing and joking together over how terrible it was.

“Y’know, there’s something I’ve always been meaning to ask you,” Hayden said as the credits began to roll.

“Shoot.”

“Why do you call Kai ‘Peanut’?”

A grin spread across Damien’s face, “She never told you?”

“I asked her, but she said it was embarrassing and told me to never speak of it again.”

Damien began to laugh quietly, “Well, long story short; Kai has this strange obsession with this peanut brand she discovered when she and Nadia went to London a few years back called KP. She gets them imported every few months in a bulk buy box, then she’s got them stashed all over her apartment. I found them one night and I’ve been teasing her relentlessly ever since. And-”

“She’s small like a peanut as well,” Hayden finished with a matching smile.

“Exactly.”

His smile only grew when he saw one of the air hostesses making her way down the aisle, “I’ve got an idea… How much cash have you got on you?”

***

A few rows down, Kai was completely engrossed in Tender Nothings, only whispering a few odd comments to Sloane about how well Bailey Johnson was doing for her first movie and how amazing the chemistry was between her and Matt Rodriguez.

“Excuse me, miss?”

Kai glanced around to see one of the air hostesses looking at her, “Hi?”

“Are you Miss Kai Park?” she asked.

“I am… Sorry, me and my friend switched seats so we could watch a movie, do we…?” Kai trailed off as the woman shook her head with a smile.

“No that’s no trouble, I have the snacks you ordered,” she said.

“Snacks?” Kai frowned, and before she could say another word, the hostess turned to her cart and began unloading handfuls of bags of peanuts onto Kai’s tray table, then onto Sloane’s. Sloane started collecting some of them into her lap as they began to overflow onto the floor.

Kai’s mouth flapped in confusion as the hostess allowed herself a little laugh before leaning in to say quieter, “You friends two rows back asked me how many complementary peanuts they were allowed, and then paid for forty more packs to send to you. They told me they’re your favourite snack and wanted to cheer you up after your bad trip to Tokyo… Excuse me for saying this, but I’m not sure which one of them is your boyfriend, but either way; you’re a very lucky woman to have two guys who care that much about you.”

“Yeah, I guess I am,” Kai said quietly, a dumbfounded smile on her face as she pushed her cart away.

She kneeled up on her seat, looking over the top of Nadia and Steve who were behind her to where Damien and Hayden were sat the row behind again, their heads poking up over the top to watch her. She heard them crack up laughing as she flashed them her middle finger, calling to them, “They’re not even the right brand, assholes.”

“Close enough, Peanut,” Damien beamed, ducking quickly back into his seat when Kai launched a packet at him.

***

After their flight landed and they headed through the airport to hire a car, Kai caught up to Damien properly.

“Did you like your present?” he asked, putting an arm around her to hold her close as they walked.

She nudged him with her hip, “The guys at customs looked at me like I was a madwoman.”

He chuckled, “Well, it’ll be worth it to keep you happy for the next few weeks. I know they’re not the brand you like, but hopefully they’ll do until we can find you somewhere more permanent to get yours delivered.”

“Oh,” she said quietly, realising the heartfelt message behind the gesture, “Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me, thank Hayden; it was his idea,” he nodded over to where Hayden was walking with Sloane, Dipper safely tucked in her carry case.

“Really?” her eyebrows went up a little and she felt her chest swell with affection.

“Yeah. We had a really good talk on the plane, and he wanted to do something to make you happy; no matter what happens over the next few weeks,” he told her, glancing at her as he watched her gaze remain settled on Hayden, noticing the soft smile on her face, “He’s a good guy.”

“Yeah,” she said softly, “He is.”

Together they headed out into the San Francisco sunshine to face their next challenges with Eros, a new but not unwelcome feeling settling in both of their hearts.

[linernotesandseasons]

My 18 Favorite Albums of 2018

Well...Here it is again! 2018 was a...YEAR. One of the toughest I’ve had so far. But full of hard work, growth, challenges, & little victories. Here are some of the albums that soundtracked it. 18 releases that I loved & supported. Songs that helped me make it through. For the seventh year in a row...My favorite albums. Listed here in no particular order (unless you know/enjoy the english alphabet). Top 5 are probably Monae, Rainbow Kitten Surprise, Field Report, McEntire, & Liza Anne, in that order. Music marks time & space. These are the ones for this year. Enjoy! 

AMERICAN TRAPPIST   /   Tentanda Via

       We start our 2018 journey in a comfortingly familiar place with the second official full length album from Toms River, New Jersey’s American Trappist. His self-titled debut made my 2016 favs list and his old band River City Extension (top 5 reunion tour wish list for sure!) were second to Fun. on my list way back in 2012. Safe to say Joe Michelini is one my favorite songwriters of the last 10 years. Lucky for us, 2018 found Michelini writing equal parts depressing & uplifting boardwalk rock & roll for/from the underdog/underground. Tentanda Via (Latin for “the way must be tried”) is a blast of an album; full of horns, drums (both jazzy & rock & roll-y!), inspired piano, & Michelini at the helm sounding altogether confident in his existential breakdowns. To me this reads like a coming-of-age album at heart (the way must be tried!), but a deeper, wiser sort of unraveling. A mid-30′s rock opus about learning to live with yourself. Learning how to make yourself better. These songs are inspiring and mix more than a little Springsteen ethos (maybe it’s the horns?!) with some late 90′s/early 2000′s emo/indie/alternative etc...

The straightforward rockers “Death Wish” & “Nobody’s Gonna Get My Soul” bookend the nine track album with surprisingly nimble & crunchy electric riffs and off-the-charts energy! In between, the mid tempo drive of “Getting Even” & “Don’t Get In” lets Michelini’s emotional writing really shine. The words jump out of the songs, full of passion, desperation, & an urgency that makes me glad people are still making records like this. There’s also a unholy, weird interlude that you have to hear to believe called “Unfresh Dirtwolf.” American Trappist is a band that came from the ashes of another band. A band that seems reluctant to tour West of...Ohio. A band that stays under the radar. Michelini has been writing some of my favorite songs for awhile & it feels good growing older together. Here’s hoping for a new one of these every other (or just every?!) year for me to belt along to with the windows down in my Subaru. Joe, if you’re listening out East, don’t stop. This is why I love music. 

       “Driving through my hometown I feel the peace of the Lord / Ride up behind me on a blind dream from my childhood / Looking back again, it’s hard to understand / Getting older, I guess I do / Waiting on some waking dream like it might find you...”

BLACK BELT EAGLE SCOUT   /   Mother of My Children

       I bought Black Belt Eagle Scout’s debut album at Twist & Shout Records the day it came out. I think I loved the cover art and the idea of Katherine Paul’s solemnly solo rock album, recorded in the dead of Winter in rural Washington, sounding like just what I wanted in my headphones to face the Fall. Then (as so often happens) I got a text a month later from my partner at 12:27am that read simply...

“I’m okay. Going to bed meow. Listen to Black Belt Eagle Scout.” 

From there we took Mother of My Children on a snowy road trip to Durango, Colorado. Crisscrossing mountain passes through snowstorms, & visiting Mesa Verde National Park, we let Paul’s earnest, determined, & emotional songs, sweep us into the gray. All this to say that this album has already marked some pretty specific time & place for me. There is a starkness to these songs, a simplicity that makes the songwriting stand alone. Where lesser lyricists would be revealed as phonies (or simply bad) Katherine Paul’s stark, powerful words are illuminated by her minimalist production. With a rhythmically mournful 80′s/90′s emo touch (for more modern emo fans I might even hear a little Manchester Orchestra) Paul doesn’t pull any punches. The guitar gets delightfully heavy on the outro to six minute epic opener “Soft Stud” and then twirls & spirals with the drums in the entrancingly sad “I Don’t Have You in My Life.” This is an important album for Paul to have written and there is a great power in her words. Oh also... she plays every instrument on the album!?! Guitar, bass, drums, vibraphone, keyboard, organ, various percussion, & all vocals. Very Vagabon. Very Caroline Rose (spoiler alert!)! With our world on fire, and full of threats (from our own government) to native lands & native people, it’s increasingly important to listen to and hear/heed the words and writings of people like Paul; a radical, indigenous, queer, feminist from Oregon. Thanks for speaking out KP. Listen to Black Belt Eagle Scout. 

       “Do you ever notice what surrounds you? When it’s all bright & tucked under / Do you ever notice what’s around you? When it’s all right under our skin...”

CAMP COPE   /   How To Socialise & Make Friends

       Camp Cope is a GREAT band name. Camp Cope is a REALLY GREAT band. Camp Cope has a wit & an attitude that is so punk rock, so genuine, & How To Socialise & Make Friends is a powerful album. Hailing from Melbourne, Australia, Camp Cope rides a practiced garage-y sound and lead singer & lyricist Georgia Mac’s passionate howl and impressive writing. As someone who grew up on early 2000′s pop-punk, emo, & alternative (something I guess I probably regret more often than celebrate. Because toxic masculinity & white male fragility) there is something so bittersweetly nostalgic in these chord progressions, the earnest electric strums, the yell-sing vocals, that takes me back to high school. Georgia Mac has a way with words, sliding them in & out, over cascading, steady strums, & then sometimes building them up to a frantic yelling. These are songs that sound as if they had to come out, had to be sung this way, like no one else could write or sing them. With an equally muscular rhythm section, “The Opener” attacks music industry sexism head on (if you haven’t seen Camp Cope live, it is chill inducing hearing a whole room belt along to every word) with a bass riff that could fly a jetliner. The three members interact so well together musically and everything from the driving “UFO Lighter” to the lilting “Sagan, Indiana” sounds tightly rehearsed. Equally passionate in their social media presence and their willingness to engage and fight for social justice issues, Camp Cope represents the future. Bands like this are changing the game right now and it’s exciting to hear it in real time. 

When I close my eyes for a second, as the title tracks rings out and the gorgeously, lightly sad “The Face of God” ambles in, I’m 17 again. I’m driving for the first time, crying at the moon by myself or laughing with my friends. I’m a freshman in college, skipping my Friday classes (and braving mountain passes!) headed west, headed home. Then I snap awake and I’m 32, it’s Winter here and Georgia bellows “Just get it all out, put it in a song. Just get it all out, write another song!” Thanks Camp Cope. This album is special. 

       “It’s another all-male tour preaching equality / It’s another straight, cis man who knows more about this than me / It’s another man telling us we’re missing a frequency / SHOW ‘EM KELLY / It’s another man telling us we can’t fill up the room / It’s another man telling us to book a smaller venue / Nah, hey, cmon girls we’re only thinking about you / Well, see how far we’ve come not listening to you / ‘Yeah just get a female opener, that’ll fill the quota’...”

CAROLINE ROSE   /   Loner

       It took Caroline Rose four years from her weirdly rootsy-riffy debut album to find her true self, but Loner sounds every bit like an artist comfortable in their own skin & confident in their craft. Dialing up the synths, fuzz, and brilliantly tongue-in-cheek lyrics, Rose touches on all the big topics: drugs, death, sex (ism), and money! with a casual, conversational songwriting maturity that belies her 28 year old sophomore-ness. Favorites include “Jeannie Becomes a Mom” (check out that bouncy organ!), the steady build & twisty, head-turning songwriting of “Getting To Me,” & the electro warp & wend of “To Die Today.” I was finally convinced into falling for this album when my partner played it three times (or was it six?) back-to-back-to-back on a rainy Summer Sunday afternoon drive from Granby, CO back into Denver. Something about the pacing; the complex, yet immediate song structures that leave you wanting more. These are songs of tested confidence. But shining through it all, Rose is a wild card. A red clad rockstar with a palpable spirit, not afraid to wear her heart on her sleeve & laugh a little along the way. Loner is full of dance jams for the cool kids & the loners. At its core it preaches acceptance, and teaches us to love ourselves & love each other for who we are. Go Caroline! See you in a month in LA! 

       “Waitress sets the tables, two & four & six / Laying placemats, knife, fork, spoon, upon napkin / All the counter people, she knows us all by name / A counter people fission, everywhere we are the same... / & so you line ‘em up, a single cell, another one gone / Ostracon vase with your name on the line...”

FIELD REPORT   /   Summertime Songs

       At some point during this year I begin to realize how important beloved songwriters releasing new works is always going to be to me, I was falling (& re-falling) for new works from long time favs Calexico, Gregory Alan Isakov, Florence & The Machine, & of course Phosphorescent. But somehow it was Field Report’s third release Summertime Songs that stuck and became perhaps the most meaningful of all. I fell in love with Field Report in the midst of a hard, hard winter (2012 I think). Their sophomore album Marigolden has been a constant companion since 2014. I first heard this set of songs (the ones that comprise Summertime) in the June of 2017, sweating in the familiar Eau Claire, Wisconsin heat. Hearing a set of 100% new, unreleased material is exciting and also kind of a risk. After the set I wrote that the new tunes “Sound like June. Like wet cement & flash floods. Like swollen rivers & mosquitos full of hard fought human blood. Like growing older & having kids. Intimate details stretched over skittery, percussive thunderclouds. Like grabbing an electric fence. Digging in &...replanting.” I was 100% in it. On a high in Wisconsin & falling deeper in love with music. Then Field Report went mostly silent & we had to wait till early 2018 to get the recorded versions. Adding even more drums (Shane Leonard deserves a shout-out here as a killer pocket player!) some electronic effects, and ramping up on the arm-out-the-rolled-down-window singalongs definitely serves Chris Porterfield (did you know the name Field Report is just an anagram of his last name?!) well. Whoever it was who asked him “why don’t you try Summertime songs” was on the right track. His songwriting is as electric as always on this set of heartbreakers & as usual he follows a lot the same threads. His lyrics here are visceral, wordy, & wise, & i can feel the songs growing up with me. Sometimes I lead, sometimes they lead me, but we always seem to find each other exactly when we need to. 

       “Time is a bird with a mean, hooked beak / & he’s just waiting around to work on you & on me... / Shotgun wedding, black on blue / The river’s swelling like a bruise...”

H.C. McENTIRE   /   Lionheart

       Heather McEntire has been carving out a name for herself in the North Carolina music scene for years fronting old-school punk band Bellefea & more recently, the much loved Mount Moriah. But way way back in January, Lionheart roared in under her own name; all ferocious & tender, confident & wild. A true southern record, Lionheart is vocal & lyric forward. From the Sunday morning hymn swell of opener “A Lamb, A Dove,” to the driving swing of “Baby’s Got the Blues,” & the late night, red wine country of “When You Come For Me.” McEntire enlists all her talented musical friends on this effort. There are co-writes with the legendary Kathleen Hanna of Bikini Kill (whom McEntire credits with helping her find her individual voice), bgvs from Amy Ray (Indigo Girls), Angel Olsen, & Tift Merrit, & inspired guitar work from William Tyler & Durham favorite Phil Cook!

Through it all, McEntire stays true to the thread that made Mount Moriah’s “How To Dance” one of my 2016 favs. Lionheart exudes the smells & scenery of North Carolina and reads like a map at times, referencing points from Stoney Creek to the Green River Gorge. Some of my favorite songs written over the last five years (or ever) have a very strong (& often specific) idea of place. If country music is going to representative of the country that I want to live in, it’s going to be sung by people like Heather McEntire.  A powerful queer southern woman; vulnerable & brave, a true Lionheart. 

       “You’ll find me in the hollow, dosing anything that might / Make the map look any smaller, give me a dog in the fight / So call it off or call it God, call it anything you like / Do you see it in my eyes? / A levee on the rise, do you see it? / The tellin’ ain’t told gently, so pay your tab & pay your dues / The dogwood & the chicory & a silent wood stove flue / Your baby’s got the blues just like you...”

iZCALLi   /   IV

       I was late to the party on Izcalli (a band from my own city!) and when I found them, it was magical, I think they were playing an opening set for Jessica Hernandez & The Deltas at Lost Lake and I probably stumbled in late from PS Lounge or Tommy’s Thai to shredding electric guitar & ska, latin funk, & pure Led Zepplin Rock & Roll. Frontman Miguel Avina was howling & stomping in Freddy Mercury-meets-Mariachi white pants, his long curly hair everywhere, all energy. I was immediately hooked. Calling them my favorite local band and finally getting to put them on this end of the year list. Izcalli joins some pretty good “local band” company here on linernotes&seasons. From Nina De Freitas’ EP last year; Yawpers, Covenhoven, & Rateliff in 2015, to Isakov & Covenhoven in 2013 & The Lumineers all the way back in 2012! Izcalli has been playing around Denver for 13 years and have slowly built up enough of a following to headline the Bluebird Theater last year. Their fourth album (aptly titled IV) comes out swinging and showcases plenty of heavy power chord riffs, violin, horn, & songs in both English & Spanish. Their heavier, more classic rock influenced songs (”Lightning Red” & “Eso Velocidad”) absolutely explode with fiery lead guitar and inspired drumming. When they dial it back and let their Mexican influences show through, like on the eerily crunchy, violin led “Quite de Mas” and the woozy saxophone breakdown of “Solo Se Morir,” they showcase depth and a real songwriting ability. There is an almost Muse-like thunder to the monstrous organ riff of “A New Lie” and closer “Si Estoy Contigo” sends everybody out dancing. With influences from all over (most notably their homeland Mexico City) & a live show that’s not to be missed, Izcalli embodies everything I think of when I think of a true Denver band. 

       “A frozen heart in me turned out to be my one way home / I swear I’ll leave, I’ll drive myself down to Mexico...”

JANELLE MONAE   /   Dirty Computer

       Dirty Computer is my favorite album of 2018. Much like my favorite album last year (Lorde’s Melodrama) no one was as simultaneously honest & excavating in their personal songwriting; while still writing such absolutely shredding club bangers, as Janelle Monae. Dirty Computer acts as a coming out party of sorts for the 32 year Kansas City-ian, although, to be fair, her first two albums had already scored her Grammy nominations and the stamp of approval from Prince, Eryakah Badu, & Michelle Obama. Her debut The ArchAndroid and her followup The Electric Lady, found her creating elaborate alter egos, protest songs, and complex, critically acclaimed song cycles about life as a black woman in America. With Dirty Computer she is able to hold multiple titles at once. Schizophrenically on top of her game, tying all her alter egos together with stellar production, monster vocals, and some of the best, most interesting pop songs since...well...maybe since Prince. From the Brian Wilson assisted eerie sci-fi sweetness of stage setting opener “Dirty Computer,” she lets loose on some of her most fun, live-a-little anthems “Crazy, Classic Life,” and “Take a Byte.” Deeply personal, political, & inspiring “Django Jane” is stunning, & sets the stage for mega back-to-back singles “Pynk” & “Make You Feel.” Songs of my (and everybody else’s) Summer for sure. “I Got The Juice,” is light & bouncy, & personal favorite “I Like That” is rebellious & rides an immediately memorable instrumental into one helluva vocal take from Monae. She makes a political statement in closing with the anthem “Americans,” (anybody else think this one especially sounds like a lost Prince track?) but her strength is her ability to be both personal & political; a true diva with a purpose. These songs are Janelle creating and sounding exactly how she wants, pushing the limits of what a superstar can do, Her show at the Paramount in July was a highlight for me, and Dirty Computer is hands down my album of the year. 

       “Box office numbers & they doin’ outstanding, running out of space in my damn bandwagon / Remember when they use to said I look too mannish? / Black girl magic yall can’t stand it...”

LIZA ANNE   /   Fine But Dying

       In a year where I seemed to gravitate to albums & songs about living in, and growing through, mental health issues; Liza Anne’s blistering (and epically titled!) Fine But Dying was definitely a top five album for me. A gifted songwriter, Dying finds Anne finally letting it out with a heavy band, a light touch, & a deep dive into the insecurities & struggles that seemed to be (gulp) some of the same ones I was going through this year. Songs about conversations, relationships (both romantic & platonic), and most importantly, about examining & improving yourself. No one on this list unpacks, observes, and mines their own heart & mind as well or as deeply as Anne does across these 11 tracks. When she really cuts loose, like in the ballistic breakdown of “Kid Gloves,” the fuzzy crunch of “Get By,” or the spiraling, swirling (& also epically titled!) “I Love You, But I Need Another Year” she shines. Fine But Dying is wise beyond its years and a no-holds-barred, place-in-time look at mental health & how we should all be addressing our issues & working things out. Her show at Globe Hall here in Denver back in April was cathartic, thoughtful, & one of my favorite of this year for sure. Yay for fearless songwriters, Yay for rock & roll. Fuck yeah Liza Anne!

       “I ran once, took my flight across the ocean / I thought if I could make my way across the sea I’d find a place / Now I’m swallowed up by a city that doesn’t give a fuck / To whether I am up on time / Or whether if I am, well...alive / & I’m so good - getting too good at hiding / Too good at keeping to myself that I’m spiraling...”

MESHELL NDEGEOCELLO   /   Ventriloquism

       I think it was “Atomic Dog 2017″ that first caught my ear at some point last year. I didn’t know Meshell Ndegeocello, but I knew that what I was hearing was classic. The off-kilter guitar strums slithering into that bass drop, finally settling into a steady groove, that melody appearing (seemingly out of nowhere) into a rolling, & instantly recognizable chorus. Next thing I know I’m googling George Clinton and off into an 80′s funk youtube rabbit hole. A covers album to stand up to any other covers album, Ndegeocello has a masterpiece on her hands in both song selection & creativity. In a year where she turned 50, the sneakily titled Ventriloquism is her 12th studio album, Inspired by listening to oldies radio on car rides to her childhood home, influenced by Prince & Neil Young; Ventriloquism is a super smooth revamp of 80s & 90s R&B. What Ndegeocello does so seamlessly on Ventriloquism is take these songs and make them flow as a part of a whole. There is light in the darkness here. There are threads of continuation here. An appreciation for those who came before, those who paved the way. Ndegeocello is a true artist and these reinterpretations not only nod to classic songs & artists, but dig out their own little important niche in 2019. 

       “Sometimes it snows in April / Sometimes I feel so bad, so bad / Sometimes I wish life was never ending / & all the good things they say, never last / Springtime was always my favorite time of year / A time for lovers holding hands in the rain...”

MIYA FOLICK   /   Premonitions

       Every year I wait till the last minute (and beyond!) to finish this list. I write it up in November & December, agonizing & filling out what I think are my favorite albums (18 this time!) of the year. I enjoy whittling the list down to a manageable number, but I also enjoy reading everyone else’s lists; finding new finds & hearing what other people liked. Then, sometime in the middle of December, I am knocked out by something I missed over all the year of listening & reading. This year it is MIYA FOLICK! I was given a wintry new year’s mix of goodbye 2018 (and F*** you!) tunes from my partner (which I will probably post & write about sometime as soon as I finish posting this because it is goooood), and track 9 of that spotify mix. Bouncy horns, a killer beat, & lyrics that cut right to me but leave me smiling. Rhyming “self home” with “cellphone”?! Singing about leaving the party?! Yesssss!. This is for me! On deeper listens, Premonitions is a goddamn masterpiece. Starting slowly & melodically, openers “Thingamajig” and the title track are captivating, then it unexpectedly explodes into 80′s dance bangers about half way through. Most of the album is deeply personal and self examining, finding Folick digging into to her own weaknesses & fears, without always settling on answers. She is vulnerable yet grand; part Lorde, part Florence, part Stevie NIcks, part Regina Spektor...All Miya. At its core, Premonitions celebrates life, celebrates the little victories. If you want to know/hear what that sounds like, maybe I should let you read from Miya’s bandcamp page...

       “Premonitions begins with ‘Thingamajig’ -- something you can't quite recall the name of, but you know exactly what it means and what it feels like. Like the pull of desire that comes with not quite remembering fully. The magnetism of something just on the tip of your tongue. I wanted the album to feel like that thing.

I think a lot about about memory-making as an act of creation, the words we use to describe a memory give shape to and sometimes mutate the memory itself. I believe that the way we choose to describe the events of our lives is not only a means of creative fulfillment, but an absolutely vital part of creating the world we want to live in. When we are dishonest in the present, we create a dishonest future. When we are honest in the present, we create a more honest future. I wanted this album to be the vehicle for a hopeful, truthful, generous, and loving world. I tried not to posture or pretend. I wrote about my life as I've seen it and how I'd like to see it, as both memory and premonition.

The producers, Justin Raisen and Yves Rothman, and I spent months collecting organic sounds to fill the world of this record. We threw away everything that felt false and tried to keep the soul of each song alive. I hope Premonitions gives you comfort and joy. I hope it feels like all the mysterious details of your lives, all your massive and mundane glories. I hope it reminds you that there is beauty in the details. Rainbows in your sprinklers. Drinking water from a hose. The way it felt to make a friend for the first time. Locking yourself in a bathroom to avoid everyone. Dancing until your shins burn. Leaving your phone in an Uber and making your best friend drive you an hour away to knock on a stranger's door after locating it on Find My Phone. Losing a friend. Losing yourself. Remembering...”

MT. JOY   /   Mt. Joy

I had almost finished making this list and nearly forgot about an album that marked a month-plus in the Spring when I listened to almost nothing else! Philly by way of LA’s Mt. Joy debut with an album that blends sunny California folk & smoothed out east coast pop-emo, into easy listening, easy singing indie rock. Named after a mountain in Valley Forge National Park (SE Pennsylvania); Mt. Joy’s songs similarly find geographic touch points across the US, making this a true road trip record. Multiple California references (San Fran, Mulholland, Hollywood, the ocean), make their way down to New Orleans, and end up on the east coast (”blood on the streets in Baltimore” & “the beaches of Chincoteague”). Without breaking any new musical ground, Mt. Joy sounds comfortable & confident, and their songs play bigger & stickier than your average radio friendly pop-saturated-folk. When the title track hits its festival ready build (”you can’t stop us, feel like Ziggy Stardust”) you’ll have a hard time not rolling down your window and singing along. “Way up over Mt, Joy. Where everyone’s free now. To move how they feel now.”

       “Your life will change straight out of the blue / The clouds in your mind just passing through / Image the horses when you set ‘em free / Go tear down the beaches of Chincoteague...”

NONAME   /   Room 25 (& Song 31)

       Room 25 kicks in innocently enough: smoothly humming wordless voices, steady drums, & jazzy piano flourishes. Like a lazy Sunday morning. Noname (Chicago’s 27 year old Fatimah Warner) introduces herself with a laid back, matter-of-fact, stream of consciousness “maybe this is the album you listen to in your car when you’re driving home late at night, really questioning every god, religion...” But then she says something that should make you pay attention. 

“Nah. Actually this is for me.” 

That creative confidence. That freedom, defines the rest of her album. No matter how much critical acclaim Room 25 racks up (I saw this album on a ton of end of the year lists!), no matter how downright fun & laugh out loud funny her breakneck rhymes are, this one is for Noname. I mean, you can still download (aka OWN...like for your ipod!) the whole album on bandcamp FOR FREE! Following in Chance’s footsteps, it’s free mp3s for people like meeee! Raised in Chicago’s slam poetry scene, she dabbles here in downtempo, smoothed out, futuristic jazz & soul. All the while she is unapologetically herself. Her words tripping over each other, too many thoughts, too much energy, too much passion to hold in. A clear blockbuster talent. One of my favorite new finds from last year’s Eaux Claires festival, her late afternoon set up on the hill was radiant & joyful. The artwork I used here is from her early 2019 single “Song 31,” as she has pledged to change the official Room 25 cover art, due to assault charges leveled in October against the artist who did the original cover. “I do not and will not support abusers, and I will always stand up for victims & believe their stories.” Noname said, and she has been proven to be as vocal in her personal life as she is on tape. As she says in the uplifting “Ace...” 

“Globalization is scary, and fuckin’ is fantastic” And yall still thought a bitch couldn’t rap huh?...

       “When labels ask me to sign, say ‘my name don’t exist’ / So many names don’t exist / Moved into Inglewood & the trauma came with the rent / Only worldly possession I have is life / Only room that I died in was 25... 

Medicine’s overtaxed, no name look like you / No name for private corporations to send emails to / Cuz when we walk into heaven, nobody’s name gonna’ exist / Just boundless movement for joy, nakedness, radiance...”

RAINBOW KITTEN SURPRISE   /   How To: Friend, Love, Freefall

       Rainbow Kitten Surprise made one of my five favorite albums this year (and probably the one that I sang along to in the car more than any other!) Imagine Modest Mouse growing up in North Carolina, in the 2010′s, writing smart, anti-lumineers-imagine dragons tunes, and going on to play arenas & rock clubs alike. This Boone, NC (pop. 17,000) five piece crank out catchy pop rock tunes; equal parts funky basslines, ooohs & ahhhs, and deceptively clever lyrics about religion, the south, and relationships both platonic & romantic. Huge single “Fever Pitch” rides rolling drums, background whoops, and finds charismatic frontman Sam Melo languidly recounting his religious upbringing and sing-rapping about getting to know you better. Other standouts include the acoustic blues (and Aha-Shake-era-Kings of Leon reminiscent!) “Painkillers,” the “Moon & Antarctica” rattletrap sing-song of “Possum Queen,” and the laugh-out-loud funny breakneck alternative pace of “Matchbox.” But it is song of the year contender “Hide” where Melo lays bare his feelings about growing up gay in a deeply religious south, when you get a peek at what Surprises these Rainbow Kittens are capable of. What starts as a bouncy love number takes a turn into some deep songwriting with “I’m running from a place where they don’t make people like me, I keep the car running, I keep my bags packed. I don’t wanna’ leave, just don’t wanna’ leave last.” This is Fruit Bats’ “Soon-to-be Ghost Town” written by someone who’s lived it. RKS packages it all up as emotional anthems, dancey-catchy choruse that stick, & an album that-while serious, is so damn fun to sing along to. They’ll be at Red Rocks next Summer so come hop on the bandwagon and get to know your new favorite band!

       “You’re a master of passive-aggressive magic tricks like “that’s not the card that I would’ve picked, but it’s your life to live like how you’d like to live...’”

SUN JUNE   /   Years

       Sun June’s debut record Years is an album that I never expected to be on this list, but one that pushed its way into my heart, ears, and mind a lot over the early Summer. I kept comparing it to Leif Vollebekk’s gorgeously haunting 2017 release Twin Solitude that made it on last year's list in that it managed to be rhythmically funky & interesting while being mostly SO quiet. Even the more “upbeat” numbers; from the gorgeously, golden swing of “Young,” to the steady backbeat of “Baby Blue” keep their composure meticulously. The writing is transfixing on Years and the band is so tight, with every member adding just the right amount of soft sound. I tried to explain it to somebody as music you have to “squint to hear.” It sounds good in the background, all sweet & rolling. But better up close, turned up in headphones. All together & bright. This is an album I would listen to sleepily, on my way home from work, driving Colfax in the first light of dawn at 5 in the morning. Sun June’s lack of an internet presence is refreshing (is there ANYWHERE I can find the lyrics for this album??!!), I think they’re from Texas, and I don’t think they’ve even played a show in Colorado yet! Regardless, Years is tied together with a quietly tight rhythm section, and Laura Colwell’s wispy vocals, grabbing at the edges of my brain, calmy insisting “Four in the morning, I could get used to this...”

       “I was almost always leaving / Looking for the reason / Bedside hospital daylight / I go with the Southern mountains / Down the 405, I’m coming tell me you don’t deserve this / I was young...”

TIERRA WHACK   /   Whack World

       I love me a good concept album, but even I would’ve thought that the idea of 15 one minute songs(complete with video accompaniment) making up an entire album, would be a tough sell. Whack World makes good on an innovative concept, delivering something breezy, catchy, & lasting, and making Tierra Whack one of my favorite new finds of 2018! My little sister showed her to me on a “Get-your-ass-to-the-gym” playlist and “Fruit Salad” was immediately stuck in my head for weeks. Mostly down-tempo, Whack is clearly a witty lyricist and creative mind, and at 23, a game changer in the music scene. Also an effortlessly cool, musical, badass. With almost no choruses, this is an album you can listen to over and over (and throw any tracks in mixes) without any clear singles. The bouncy gospel-tinged “Pet Cemetery” has hand claps & dog barks, and is followed immediately by the laugh-out-loud vocals of “Fuck Off.” Whack never takes herself too seriously (so many off the wall and laugh out loud funny vocals!) and the Philly native shows that one minute songs can turn a lot of heads and end up on a lot of end of the year best album lists! Whack World!

       “Crispy clean and crisp & clean / For the dough I go nuts like Krispy Kreme / Music is in my Billie genes / Can’t no one ever come between yeah / Don’t worry about me I’m doing good, I’m doing great, alright...”

TYPHOON   /   Offerings

       It seemed like a lifetime since Typhoon released their sophomore knockout, masterpiece album White Lighter back in 2013. I’ve grown a lifetime since, experienced everything since. In the first few weeks of January 2018, out of the darkness, out of the silence: came something darker, weirder, but still magical and at its core, celebratory. Typhoon is one of my all-time favorite bands, one of my favorite live shows, and frontman Kyle Morton writes about memory & loss, life & death, better than anybody in the game. With Offerings they have dropped the peppy horns, slimmed down to (only!) seven members, and zeroed in on the heavy, spiraling folk-rock that hearkens back a little to Bright Eyes or The Decemberists, Broken Social Scene or Arcade Fire. As a loose concept album, Offerings explores in four movements (Floodplans, Flood, Reckoning, & Afterparty) what happens to a mind stripped of memory. Or (side quest/plot/twist) a world willfully forgetting its history. From the hushed chanting that explodes into huge string swells, drums, and shouts of opener “Wake” to the rhythmic, glowing build of the 8 minute “Empricist,” to the mystical picking and ruminating of “Algernon” the first movement could almost stand as an album of its own. The rest of the album unravels at equal parts slow reflection (”Mansion” & “Beachtowel”) and sweeping indie rock (”Remember” & “Darker”). Although a lengthy (and at times not easy) listen, I think Offerings will go down as one of the most ambitious rock records of the last few years. 

       “& so the light fades / It’s still your birthday / So blow out your past lives like they’re candles on a cake...”

VALLEY MAKER   /   Rhododendron

       There is a mysticism buried somewhere in the emotive vocals & break-in-the-clouds writing of North Carolina by way of Washington State’s Valley Maker. Austin Crane is the singular voice behind the Valley Maker project, painting time & space on a dark, slippery canvas, and hiding complex truths in the rhythmic tides of Rhododendron. This ground has been tread before; by countless folk singers & prophets, wailing of death, dark magic, & the myriad mysteries of time, but Valley Maker understand their place in the linear and bring a modern take to ancient stories. Part War on Drugs-highway-drone (check the double yellow rattle of “Light on the Ground”), part Ben Howard’s-foggy-British-countryside (”Beautiful Birds Flying”), Crane writes songs that stick. They claw and seep their way into skin, into veins, and haunt in a way that echoes of the past. This is songwriting as a conduit. These stories are Crane’s, but they are older; tales told since religion begin. From the first lines of the roiling, dark sky opener (”time is just a game I play / it’s written on the ocean’s waves / circling beyond my brain / something I could not contain.”) to the uncertain give & take of the earthy “Seven Signs” (”I’m cutting in line but I haven’t decided...”) the writing is equal to the musicianship Crane and his backing band clearly have in spades. With Chaz Bear (Toro Y Moi) providing stellar percussion and Amy FItchette (who I was lucky enough to see sing with VM at the Doug Fir in Portland) lending absolutely haunting, otherworldly harmonies, Crane has depth beyond his strange tunings and bleep & bloop electric forests. Through it all there is a steady rhythm to the darkness and like in “Baby, In Your Kingdom” when he tops a wonderfully simple, acoustic walk-down with “Baby are you satisfied? Take a decade, take a lifetime, I know we’re always on a one way street...” there is a timeless beauty even in the mystery. Oh, and saxophone. Rhododendron has some great saxophone. 

       “Baby in the next life / I can touch you, I can ride the light / Goddamn I wan’t where I thought I’d be / 29. Burn the world around me & I hide / Baby in your kingdom / Sink my roots in, I’m a tall tree / I know, wind is gonna blow again / I know, when I am with you...I am known...”

[ifanfictiondreamerworld]

Kim Possible: The Extremely Secret Files-Part 13

They continued their way through other areas of the resort, fighting off more robots and bad guys. Along the way, the Kimmunicator went off. Kim answered it. Kim: "Wade, what's the sitch?" Wade: "Kim, you and Ratchet need to take part in the resort's arena." Ratchet: "We're already on our way there, Wade." Wade: "No, I mean you really have to take part in it and win no matter what." Ratchet: "Um…OK? You seem very eager to have us participate in these games. Why?" Wade: "I just checked the prizes for these battles and one of them is a piece of Dr. Possible's space shuttle." Kim: "What?" Ratchet: "No wonder you're so zealous about this." Kim: "If that's true, then we have to get over there right away."

She tucked away the Kimmunicator and then grabbed Ratchet by the hand. Kim: "Come on, we have to hurry."

They ran for the entrance to the arena as fast as they could. Upon their entry, they were greeted by a vicious "welcome" in addition to an announcer that doesn't know either of their names. Regardless, they were both ready to fight. The first of their challenges was the very tough, with countless foes coming at them from every corner and with many rounds that seem to have come one after another with no end in sight, but they were able to hold their own during these battles and fought through all of them. At the very end of the battles, Kim and Ratchet won their prizes: one for each of them. Ratchet receives a very useful gadget and Kim receives another piece of her dad's shuttle. With all of the much needed prizes won, they left the arena.

Immediately afterwards, the Kimmunicator went off. She answered it. Kim: "What is it?" Wade: "Kim, it's Ron. He asks to speak with you now." Kim: "Put him on."

Wade displayed Ron on the Kimmunicator. Ron: "KP! Ratchet! Clank was stolen!" Ratchet: "What!? Ron! What happened? How did this happen?" Ron: "I was about to order 2 Nacos for me and Rufus when all of a sudden, Clank went missing! I searched all over the penthouse trying to find him but then I received this message that both of you really need to see!"

Displayed on the Kimmunicator was a footage of the Thief holding Clank hostage, threatening Ratchet and his friends to leave the galaxy by electrocuting Clank. Ratchet: "Oh no! Clank!" Ron: "You guys have got to come here quick! Who knows what else that Thief guy will do to Clank?!" Kim: "Don't worry, Ron. We'll be there as soon as we can. Just stay where you are."

She tucked the Kimmunicator away. Kim: "Let's get over there now!" Ratchet: "You took the words out of my mouth, Kimberly."

They rushed back to the ship and left for Megapolis.

They arrived at the Planet Endako and landed in Megapolis. They jumped out of the ship immediately after they landed. Kim: "Let's go find Ron." Ratchet: "OK."

They rushed into the city at full speed. As they rushed through the city, they fought through many robots that came at them and tried to attack them. They managed to clobber every robot that came their way. Further into the city, they were taken by surprised from what appeared to be a large thug in a chopper. Thug: "Peek-a-boo!"

The thug flew off. Kim: "Who was that?" Ratchet: "I don't know, but I would like to find out. Let's go."

They continued after the thug. They kept on rushing off, fighting more robots along the way. Soon enough, they reached a balcony where they came face to face with the thug in the chopper. Kim: "Oh!" Thug: "Greetings, morons. Since my employees did such a lousy job of takin' care of yous twos, I thought I'd come and handle things myself." Kim: "You're the leader of those squads of boneheads? If your men are as terrible as the name of your company, then it's no wonder they were unable to even come close to bringing us down."

Ratchet laughed at her remark. Thug: "No one bad-mouths the name Thug-4-Less or my squads of men! You and fuzz ball are goings down, Missy Redhead!" Ratchet: "Missy Redhead? That's the dumbest name I have ever heard." Kim: "Well, at least he didn't say "seriously" like that other bonehead back at home who calls me red."

They fought against the thug leader. It was a rough battle, especially with the thug leader blasting and destroying everything on the balcony and attempted to destroy the actual balcony with them on it. But they were able to defeat him before he was able to do that. His chopper began to fall. Thug: "Don't think this is overs! I'll remembers yous twos!"

They watched as he fell many stories to the ground. Kim: "Glad that's over with. Let's meet up with Ron. I only hope he's still at the penthouse, even more so then earlier; safe and sound." Ratchet: "So do I."

They continued their trek through the city. They were eventually they were able to reach the penthouse. There, they met up with Ron. He was very, very relieved to see them again. Ron: "KP! Ratchet! Thank goodness you were able to get here!" Kim: "We got here as fast as we could. Are you OK, Ron?" Ron: "I'm fine, but I'm not the one you should be worrying about! Clank should be much more of a concern to you! I can't believe I let that Thief take him from under my nose like that. I've only known him for such short time and yet I felt as though I have been such a terrible friend to not have prevented this from happening. I should have never left him alone to order Nacos!" Rufus: "(cry) Clank!" Kim: "Don't worry, Ron. There really wasn't anything you could have done to prevent this. We're here now, so let's go find him together."

Ratchet took a few sniffs of the place and almost gagged. Ratchet: "Ew, what is that horrible stench? It almost smells like unappetizing and non-nutritional food-like substances." Kim: "That would be from Ron's favorite kind of food. Really, Ron? Even in another galaxy, you somehow manage to find a way to order Bueno Nacho?" Ron: "Hey, the food isn't Bueno Nacho; it's something that's almost like that and that's good enough. Right, Rufus?" Rufus: "Oh, yeah! Very good!" Ratchet: "It's still rancid." Kim: "Come on, let's go find Clank." Ron: "I'm right behind you, KP."

They left the penthouse and continued on their way.

Read more

[patriotsnet]

Can Republicans Take Back The House

New Post has been published on https://www.patriotsnet.com/can-republicans-take-back-the-house/

Can Republicans Take Back The House

The Gop Has Yet To Land A Single Top Recruit To Run For The Senate Anywhere In The Country

Representative Kevin McCarthy discusses if Republicans can take back the House in 2020

The surest way that Republicans can stop whatever legislative agenda President Biden has in mind after the 2022 midterm elections is to win a majority in the US Senate.

Even more than the House, a simple majority in the Senate could let Republicans gum up everything from gun control legislation to Supreme Court nominations.

On paper, it seems easy enough. Republicans need to win just a single seat in order to flip the 50-50 Senate and possibilities for doing so are all over the map. Given that midterm elections often benefit the party out of power, and Democrats control two out of three levers of the federal government, Republicans wouldnât be overly optimistic in assuming Mitch McConnell might soon rule the Senate again.

But here is the thing about the GOPâs chances: At this early stage, they are having problems getting good candidates to sign up. And while the historical trends look good for Republicans you canât win something with nothing.

Republicans have yet to land a single top recruit to run for the Senate anywhere in the country â even in places where they have an opportunity to flip a seat â and a good candidate could make all the difference.

In Nevada, Republicans are pinning their hopes on getting former state attorney general Adam Laxalt in the race to challenge Masto, who won in 2016 by just 3 percentage points. So far, Laxalt has not announced plans to run and he comes with baggage: he lost a bid for governor in 2018.

House Republicans Voice Optimism On Winning Back The House Following Special Election Victories

Coming on the heels of two special election wins, House Republicans are feeling a new sense of optimism about their odds of taking back control of the lower chamber, with National Republican Congressional Committee Chairman Tom EmmerThomas Earl EmmerCrypto industry seeks to build momentum after losing Senate fightTrump-backed Mike Carey wins GOP primary in Ohio special electionJuan Williams: Biden’s child tax credit is a game-changerMORE saying he feels the House is more than just in play.;

While independent political forecasters have largely projected that Republicans face a steep uphill climb to win back the majority citing the number of retirements, the number of seats that flipped in the midterms and the fact that Democrats have a cash advantage top GOP lawmakers say Rep. Mike Garcia’s victory over Democrat Christy Smith in a competitive swing district indicates political analysts may be underestimating the partys momentum.;

The Garcia election in Los Angeles I think was a wake-up call to all the skeptics out there that in the middle of all of these difficult challenges, a Republican just flipped a seat in the suburbs of L.A., and that hasnt been done in 22 years, House Minority Whip Steve ScaliseStephen Joseph ScaliseLouisiana delegation asks for additional relief funding after IdaFEMA has funds to cover disasters for nowWatch live: Scalise holds news conference on Afghanistan MORE told The Hill.;

Al Weaver contributed.

Gerrymandering Texas Could Help Republicans Take Back The House In 2022

HOUSTON Fort Bend County was a sleepy suburban outpost of Houston when KP George arrived in the late 1990s, dominated by conservative politics and represented in Congress by Republican Party star Tom DeLay.

Twenty years later, the areas population has more than doubled in size, driven by fast-growing Asian, Latino and Black communities that in 2019 helped elect George an immigrant from southern India as Fort Bends first non-white county judge.

The wave of left-leaning voters that elevated George and other Democrats to local office in recent years may also help the area land a new congressional district. Texas gained two House seats in the 2020 U.S. Census, driven by a population boom in the Houston and Dallas-Fort Worth metropolitan regions, among other parts of the state.

But the Republican-controlled state legislature will be in charge of drawing the new districts, leaving Democrats on the sidelines, worried they may not benefit from the regions changing demographics.

You feel like youre not being counted, George said. My county is benefitting from people like me. But when it comes to the seat at the table , we dont have it.

Redistricting is a byzantine process that plays out behind closed doors, but the stakes are high. New congressional and state legislative lines will remain in place for the next decade, giving the parties that benefit most from redistricting considerable clout in policymaking and upcoming elections.

Also Check: Who Won The House Republicans Or Democrats

Democrats And Republicans Vote Straight In Line With Their Parties

Every Republican voted no Wednesday as the Democratic-led U.S. House passed the $1.9 trillion legislation. No Senate Republican voted for the bill when it;came before that chamber;Saturday.

During weeks of debate,;Republicans said the bulk of the spending would go;to an array of items unrelated to COVID-19 from Amtrak railroad service to arts and humanities programs.

Former President Donald Trump issued a short statement after the bill’s passage Wednesday, taking credit for development of COVID-19 vaccines in what could be a glimpse into Republican talking points.;

If I wasnt President, you wouldnt be getting that beautiful shot for 5 years, at best, and probably wouldnt be getting it at all. I hope everyone remembers! Trump said.

The bill; to Americans, extends unemployment benefits, addresses child poverty and health care programs;and speeds up programs to supply COVID-19 vaccinations and school reopenings; all items Democrats frequently tout.

Chris Taylor, a spokesperson for the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee, said “the;American people will remember that House Republicans voted against cutting childhood poverty in half” and “getting stimulus checks into the hands of struggling Americans,” among;other benefits.

“House Republicans left American families out to dry,” he said. “The people won’t forget that.”;

Its Not All Bad News For Democrats

While it was unquestionably a good night for Republicans, Democrats still held onto most of the seats they won in 2018 and will continue to be the majority party in the House. Thats in part because they retained most of the suburban districts they picked up in 2018.

Of the 233 seats that Democrats held coming into the election,2 186 of them were in districts that were predominantly or partly suburban in nature, according to density categorizations by Bloombergs CityLab. Thus far, Democrats have lost seven of those seats, but they captured one GOP-held suburban seat around Atlanta. And thanks to redistricting, theyve also won two formerly Republican seats around Greensboro and Raleigh in North Carolina, which reflect the partys strength in more populous areas.

Because of their relative success in the suburbs, Democrats kept many seats in places President Trump won in 2016. Coming into the election, Democrats held 30 seats in districts Trump carried in 2016, and they wouldve lost their majority if theyd lost more than half of them . But theyve won 18 of them so far and picked up one from the GOP . In fact, more than half of Republicans gains have come in seats representing places that Trump won by a pretty sizable margin in 2016. Well have to wait a bit before data can tell us how congressional districts voted in 2020,3 but for now it seems many Republican gains were made by picking off the lowest-hanging fruit.

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The Justice Department Puts States On Notice About Election Audits And Voting Changes

“If they’re going to try to rely on rigging this game, because they don’t have a plan for the future and they can’t talk to the voters about their ideas and their vision, well, I think that makes me proud to be a Democrat.”

Maloney also posits that GOP turnout will be depressed in an election that doesn’t feature former President Donald Trump himself.

“There’s no evidence that this toxic Trump message will motivate voters without Trump on the ballot,” he says. “If the other side is making one big mistake, I think that might be it, which is a doubling down on this toxic Trump message of division and anger and racism and yet there’s no evidence they can pull out voters with the message without the messenger.”

He points to Texas Republican Jake Ellzey as a recent example. Ellzey was sworn in to the House on Friday, days after winning a special election that saw him defeat a Trump-backed candidate.

Maloney underscores: “It seems like the Trump endorsement’s not what it used to be.”

Here are more highlights from his conversation with NPR’s Susan Davis.

On polarization in Congress:

On the Republican Party:

On his own reelection in 2022:

I Do Not Buy That A Social Media Ban Hurts Trumps 2024 Aspirations: Nate Silver

sarah: Yeah, Democrats might not have their worst Senate map in 2022, but it will by no means be easy, and how they fare will have a lot to do with the national environment. And as we touched on earlier, Bidens overall approval rating will also make a big difference in Democrats midterm chances.

nrakich: Yeah, if the national environment is even a bit Republican-leaning, that could be enough to allow solid Republican recruits to flip even Nevada and New Hampshire. And then it wouldnt even matter if Democrats win Pennsylvania and Wisconsin.

One thing is for sure, though whichever party wins the Senate will have only a narrow majority, so I think were stuck in this era of moderates like Sens. Joe Manchin and Lisa Murkowski controlling every bills fate for at least a while longer.;

sarah: Lets talk about big picture strategy, then, and where that leaves us moving forward. Its still early and far too easy to prescribe election narratives that arent grounded in anything, but one gambit the Republican Party seems to be making at this point is that attacking the Democratic Party for being too progressive or woke will help them win.

What do we make of that playbook headed into 2022? Likewise, as the party in charge, what are Democrats planning for?

With that being said, the GOPs strategies could still gin up turnout among its base, in particular, but its hard to separate that from general dissatisfaction with Biden.

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Rising Violent Crime Is Likely To Present A Political Challenge For Democrats In 2022

But there are roadblocks to fully enacting Democrats’ agenda. Their thin majorities in both chambers of Congress mean nearly all Democrats have to get on board with every agenda item in order to push through major legislative priorities. And without adjusting or eliminating the legislative filibuster in the Senate, Democrats need 10 Republicans to join them for various legislation a near-impossible task.

Will 2022 Be A Good Year For Republicans

Can the GOP take back the House? Kevin McCarthy weighs in

A FiveThirtyEight Chat

Welcome to FiveThirtyEights politics chat. The transcript below has been lightly edited.

sarah : Were still more than a year away from the 2022 midterm elections, which means it will be a while before we should take those general election polls too seriously. But with a number of elections underway in 2021, not to mention a number of special elections, its worth kicking off the conversation around what we do and dont know about Republicans and Democrats odds headed into the midterms.

Lets start big picture. The longstanding conventional wisdom is that midterm elections generally go well for the party thats not in the White House. Case in point: Since 1946, the presidents party has lost, on average, 27 House seats.

What are our initial thoughts? Is the starting assumption that Republicans should have a good year in 2022?

alex : Yes, and heres why: 2022 will be the first federal election after the House map are redrawn. And because Democrats fell short of their 2020 expectations in state legislative races, Republicans have the opportunity to redraw congressional maps that are much more clearly in their favor. On top of that, Republicans are already campaigning on the cost and magnitude of President Bidens policy plans to inspire a backlash from voters.

geoffrey.skelley :Simply put, as that chart above shows, the expectation is that Democrats, as the party in the White House, will lose seats in the House.;

nrakich : What they said!

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Possible 2010 Or 2014 Midterm Repeat

Big bets on policy also don’t necessarily pay off at the ballot box, a lesson Democrats learned a decade ago when they passed the Affordable Care Act. President Barack Obama’s domestic policy achievement also helped decimate congressional Democratic majorities in the 2010 and 2014 midterm elections.

It’s just one reason why Republicans feel good about their chances in 2022, along with structural advantages like the redistricting process, where House districts are redrawn every decade to reflect population changes. Republicans control the process in more states and are better positioned to gain seats.

“This deck is already stacked, because they’ve been gerrymandering these districts,” Maloney says. “And now they’re trying to do even more of it and add to that with these Jim Crow-style voter suppression laws throughout the country.”

He maintains that efforts among Republican-led state legislatures to enact more voting restrictions show the party has a losing policy hand for the midterm elections.

Jim Jordan: Biden Has Not Done One Thing Right Gop Will Take Back House In 2022

OPINION: This article contains commentary which reflects the authors opinion

Ohio GOP Rep. Jim Jordan says that Joe Biden has not done one thing right and that he thinks Bidens incompetence will cost Democrats next year.

During an interview on FNCs FOX News Primetime, Jordan said Republicans will take back control of the U.S. House of Representatives in the 2022 midterm elections.Guest host Tammy Bruce said, What is your message to the American people as we deal with the unfolding disaster of the Biden administration?Jorden said, Well, yeah, defend anyone who gets attacked. These people running for school board because they

Read the rest of this story here: conservativebrief.com

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JD Rucker EIC

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Republicans Winning Money Race As They Seek To Take Over House In 2022

By Alex Rogers and Manu Raju, CNN

The National Republican Congressional Committee announced Wednesday that it had raised $45.4 million in the second quarter of 2021, the most it has ever raised in three months of a non-election year, as Republicans seek to take over the House in 2022.

This story has been updated with additional developments Wednesday.

Republicans Are Well Positioned To Take The House In 2022

Although we dont yet know the winners of some House races, we can already look ahead to the 2022 midterms and see a fairly straightforward path for the GOP to capture the House. Midterm elections historically go well for the party thats not in the White House, and the out-of-power party is especially likely to do well in the House, since every seat is up for election .

Since the end of World War II, the presidential party has lost an average of 27 House seats in midterm elections, as the chart below shows. No matter how many seats Democrats end up with after 2020s election at this point, they will probably end up somewhere in the low 220s a loss of that magnitude would easily be enough for Republicans to retake the House.

The recent history of midterms in a Democratic presidents first term seems especially promising for the GOP, too. Following Bill Clintons election in 1992, Democrats lost more than 50 seats in 1994, and after Barack Obama won the presidency in 2008, Democrats lost more than 60 seats.

If Democrats had added five to 10 seats this year, they could have survived a 20-seat loss in the midterms. Instead, Republicans will probably need to win fewer than 10 seats to gain a slender majority in 2022.

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Top Republicans Think Taking Back House And Senate Would Force Biden To Center

Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell says if Republicans can win back control of Congress in the 2022 midterms, it would force President Joe Biden into a political corner.

Speaking at an event in his home state of Kentucky, McConnell says Americans will have a big decision to make come midterms when control of the House and Senate will be up for grabs.

Do they really want a moderate administration or not? If the House and Senate were to return to Republican hands that doesnt mean nothing will get done, McConnell said.

What I want you to know is if I become majority leader again its not for stopping everything. Its for stopping the worst. Its for stopping things that fundamentally push the country into a direction that at least my party feels is not a good idea for the country. I could make sure Biden makes his promise to be a moderate, he added.

Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell suggested Monday that he would block a Supreme Court nominee in 2024 if Republicans regain control of the Senate after the 2022 midterm elections.

— USA TODAY

One of the things McConnell would be guaranteed to block from Biden would be a Supreme Court nomination, much like he did with former President Barack Obama and his last nominee, Merrick Garland.;

The Democrats hold a slim lead of nine seats in the House with all 435 seats up for grabs.

[365-money-diary]

DAYS 15-21

DAY FIFTEEN [JAN 15]

8:40 AM - Wake up feeling sore AF. I should’ve stretched after playing, but I obviously didn’t. I also feel like my stomach didn’t eat itself from the inside out while I was sleeping so that’s nice too. Make a chemex and get to work.

10:00 AM - eat plant yogurt.

11:00 AM - eat a few carrots and a clementine.

12:30 PM - make a greek salad for lunch with a La Croix - this is the last of the salad ingredients until Thursday essentially. Shed a singular tear.

3:00 PM - I am a tiny bit hungry. Eat a piece of rye toast.

4:14 PM - I wanted to start working out 45 minutes ago ugh. OK here we go. The hour goes by a lot faster than I expected which is nice. Rinse off and cook an early dinner – Reubens and potatoes.

8:00 PM - I wanted to drink alcohol but I’m too full from dinner to even enjoy it. Heat up chamomile tea instead. I want to work on my blog but K wants to hang instead and I’m in no position to deny the closeness. We play some Mario Kart, watch 30 for 30 about BC and the mob, and turn in early.

DAY FIFTEEN TOTAL: $0

DAY SIXTEEN

8:30 AM - Make chemex and eat a clementine. My sister (S) asked me and my brother (B) to listen to a 20 minute session on the app Mined about codependency. I take a stab at it and get some good notes. 

10:00 AM - Landscaper is going to show up any second so I move my car and pick up dog poop. Text with S more about my cousin’s virtual baby shower tomorrow and go in on some cute stuff from PBKids. Total is $64.05 and she venmos me $32. $32.05

11:15 AM - I actually have a lot of stuff I need to do this weekend though right now I’m too annoyed at my neighbor to focus. Long story short – he has been wanting our dead grapefruit tree for like 6 months and keeps asking if he can cut it down. I said sure. But then he asked our landscaper to do it for him? It’s weird. I mostly don’t care because it’s gone, but the nerve he had to insert himself is wild. $120

12:00 PM - Make Tofu tacos for breakfast and make a to-do list of stuff I want to accomplish today. (post cauliflower leek soup, put away records, barre throw away things my mom has forced me to take out of her house over the years, wipe doors)

6:00 PM - Eat 2 rice cakes. I only manage to get the cauliflower leek soup up, put away the records, and throw away the stuff mom gave me. I think today ended up being a little bit overwhelming emotionally with the landscaper plus the codependency session so I’m kind of burnt. 

7:00 PM - Make pad thai for dinner. Can’t stop snacking on Swedish fish. Drink an old fashioned while K and I watch Night Stalker. Realize part way through that the reason I keep eating Swedish Fish is because something feels off. I fall asleep around 11:30 knowing it’s my blood pressure and that if it doesn’t fix over night I’ll get right to it in the morning.

DAY SIXTEEN TOTAL: $152.35

DAY SEVENTEEN

8:00 AM - Wake up feeling like I’ve been hit by a bus. Ugh. I’ve been struggling with an iron deficiency for a while and have it mostly fixed but I still have occasional days where my blood pressure really gives me issues. 

9:00 AM - Peel myself out of bed and drink some soy sauce. Sounds disgusting but sodium is the only thing that truly helps AND it works fast. Drink a chemex and a boat load of water. Work on posting the cauliflower leek soup

10:00 AM - S calls and I take a walk to chat. I’m still feeling really down from the blood pressure but I know walking will help. It’s actually really nice to get outside. I should do this again later tonight.

11:00 AM - More soy sauce, more water, more coffee. Have a good direction for where I want to go today. Just taking it one task at a time based on how I feel and granting myself the grace.

12:30 PM - Feel good enough to start moving which is great because once I can get over the initial fog with this blood pressure stuff, moving is what keeps me feeling better. Wipe down the doors and then attend a virtual baby shower for my cousin E. 

3:00 PM - Make broccoli fried rice for lunch. I prefer the cauliflower but the store was out of it. I feel like this broccoli stuff would taste great with some kind of cilantro hummus situation but that’ll be for another day I suppose.

3:30 PM - Back to cleaning! The bathrooms are always terrible and today is no exception. It’s always hard to tell if I even make progress because everything is white and the grout is stained orange. Give up after an hour and a half.

6:30 PM - Tag team folding a couple loads of laundry with K while we watch NBA. This week ends bittersweet for my fantasy team. He beat me in one but I’m in first place in the other. Officially 3-1 and 4-0.

8:00 PM - Eat leftover pad thai for dinner.

DAY SEVENTEEN TOTAL: $0

DAY EIGHTEEN

8:30 AM - Wake up feeling like I was hit by a smartcar, so a little better! Today is MLK day and I’m grateful for the extra day off. Make a Chemex, drink some soy sauce, and watch an episode of The Challenge. Pure barre charge comes thru. $15

9:30 AM - Get started on dusting the entire house. It’s been a few weeks since I’ve done this due to lack of Swiffer 360 dusters. It takes forever but honestly our house hasn’t looked this good in years. Swap out the lightbulbs in the bathrooms and the bedroom, shower, and eat a plant yogurt.

11:30 AM - Have a sibling zoom call with S&B I walk while we chat and it’s honestly really nice to get outside. 

1:30 PM - Start shooting my recipe for lasagna rollups. Eat a cup of cauliflower leek soup and a few pretzel rods while I cook. It takes a while but I think they turn out great.

4:00 PM - Eat a lasagna roll and watch an episode of The Challenge. I haven’t worked out in 400 years (read: yesterday and the day before.) and it’s low key killing me, so I suit up and do the thing.

6:00 PM - That was mildly painful. Low cal burn, couldn’t focus to save my life - new moves so lots of pausing during transitions. Oh well. At least I did it.

7:00 PM - Eat two more lasagna rolls for dinner. K and I watch Terrorism Close Calls and I drink a vodka + vanilla seltzer + orange peel.

DAY EIGHTEEN TOTAL: $15

DAY NINETEEN

8:30 AM - It’s appraisal day. Ugh. So excited to get this over with. Make a chemex and open my work stuff. I have a lot to do but have a feeling I won’t be able to concentrate very well until after the appraisal is over. On a nice note - I am feeling leaps and bounds better from yesterday and the day before. 

10:00 AM - Eat a plant yogurt and finish out the rest of my coffee. Meet with my teammates about an outstanding task and then do the random stuff around the house to prep for my appointment.

12:00 PM - Here goes nothing! K and I leave the house with KP and walk her around the block a few times until the appraisal is done. As much as I feel like my anxiety should be gone, it’s not. I think particularly because today is really busy with work. K and I hang out outside on our laptops for a bit to let the house air out before going back inside.

1:00 PM - Eat broccoli fried rice for lunch with a Polar seltzer. Snack on a pretzel rod and some Swedish Fish while it heats.

3:00 PM - Eat the last of the cauliflower leek soup and a few carrots.

5:30 PM - Make a nuun and do a barre live stream. My focus today is so much better but my cal burn is abysmal again. Rinse off and heat up lasagna rolls for dinner. Snack on Swedish Fish while they heat. I really wish I had wine right now because I can feel my body could use the extra help blood pressure-wise but I won’t get my alcohol delivery until Thursday. Sigh.

8:00 PM - Idk whats up but my body is asking for more food so I eat tortilla crumbs and salsa and some dark chocolate. Make vegan ham brine for seitan. Realize I’m out of liquid smoke and buy a 6 pack from Amazon. $15.37

9:30 PM - It’s official, this iron thing is killing me. Ugh. Now I know. I’ll be more conscientious of my supplements, I promise! Finish editing photos of Thousand Island Dressing, watch The Challenge and call it a day.

DAY NINETEEN TOTAL: $15.37

DAY TWENTY

8:30 AM - Still feeling off from iron. This is seriously the worst it’s been in MONTHS. Worst part - it takes 4 weeks for you to produce new blood cells so I can only assume this will happen again since there was a substantial gap in my supplementing.

9:00 AM - Make a chemex, prep the seitan ham dough and bake. I chat with Google support for an account I’m having problems with. The person’s name is Swastika. Feels like a bad omen for inauguration day. Eat 2 clementines and pretzel rod.

12:20 PM - Starving. Decide on Lasagna roll ups for lunch with a Polar. 

2:00 PM - Finish my work for the day. I have on my list of things to do that I want to test this orange spice bread for the blog.

3:00 PM - Spice bread in the oven. Do a round of dishes to prep for tonight’s grocery run. It doesn’t come out great and I eat two slices.

5:15 PM - Do a barre live stream and it goes really well. Super focused, super strong, super sweaty. One more class to go for the challenge this month! Rinse off and continue prepping the kitchen and do the final bake on the ham. 

7:05 PM - Ensue grocery madness. Incoming of onions, bananas, lemons, limes, bell peppers, cucumbers, cheese, cheeze, tortilla chips, tomatoes, dark chocolate, green beans, broccoli, jalapeños, low carb tortillas, bread, oranges, potatoes, cilantro, chickpeas, romaine, celery, clementines, spring mix, frozen burritos, apples, oat milk, tofu, soyrizo, brussels sprouts, eggs, grapes, frozen peas, vegan sour cream, taco seasoning, tomato paste, chipotle peppers in adobo sauce, corn, black beans, avocados, mushrooms, snap peas, pineapple, vegan mayo, carrots, rice noodles, seltzer, beets, cauliflower, parsley, pumpkin seeds, thyme, plant yogurt, garlic, riced broccoli, white rice, gf pretzels, micro arugula, & black olives. $327.69

8:15 PM It takes over an hour, but everything is washed and put away! Make air fried broccoli with miso butter and veggie sandwiches for dinner. 

9:00 PM - Make a crappy drink with flavored vodka. The only thing I have in my house is shooters left over from my sister’s bachelorette party. She’s now divorced if that gives you any idea of how long this stuff has been sitting around. More alcohol comes tomorrow at least! Eat a few Swedish fish.

9:30 PM - Play Mario Kart, watch The Challenge, and call it a night.

DAY TWENTY TOTAL: $327.69

DAY TWENTY-ONE

8:30 AM - Chemex and work. Alcohol is coming sometime this AM from my friend J who has a wholesale hookup. Much like everything else in the pandemic, I just buy in bulk. It’s easier that way!

10:30 AM - Eat a slice of orange spice bread for breakfast. It’s definitely growing on me but I think I need to adjust a few things before shooting/posting. J drops off my booze order. I got 2 crates of wine (24 bottles total), a bottle of bourbon, rye, mezcal, rum, and st. germaine. She says it was $400 but I pay her more. $450

11:00 AM - Start prepping chile de arbol salsa & stuff for this week’s salad - spring mix, roasted tofu with taco seasoning, avo, chipotle ranch dressing, cilantro, green onion, black beans, tomatoes and corn. YUM. Eat salad with a La Croix. 

3:00 PM - I get the appraisal back! My house came in at $390k. (I bought it for $245k) OMG! Eat a celebratory slice of orange bread.

6:45 PM - Finish class 15/15 for the barre challenge. 11 more months to go. hah! Rinse off, roast potatoes for veggie sandwiches. Pour a celebratory glass of wine. 

8:30 PM - Pour another half glass. What a week! End up going on a walk with K & KP which was really nice. I need to get out more. This weekend I will. Stay tuned. ~*~*~

DAY TWENTY-ONE TOTAL: $450