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Ellen: it's been an awfully big adventure

December 7th, 2012

I don’t know how to start this, other then diving right in so….I’ll dive.

It is with a sad face I have to report that I am leaving Los Campesinos!. The show on the 15th of December in London will be my last, and I shall spend it struggling not to cry. Please don’t point out my tears if you come along. Simply pretend it is eye sweat.

Over the last seven years I have been blessed, not by God, because he doesn’t exist, but with opportunities and a life I will not fully appreciate until I am about forty-five. I will look back at old photos of the band, with our smooth skin and questionable hair, and go “fuck me. That was mental.”

The past and present members of Los Campesinos! have been my family for the last seven years and seen me at my lowest, my highest, my most angry, sad, happy, broken, fixed, grown up and immature. They have seen me fail, succeed, let myself and them down, learn the hard way, but they have also seen me grow. And they have always had my back, and I hope, I sincerely hope, I have done my best to have theirs.

There is not a terribly exciting reason for me leaving, (so please start some exciting rumours), I am just going to try something new. Fulfil my ambitions of becoming a failed writer and developing a opium habit. It’s all going to be very retro. I leave with the upmost love and support from the band, but I have requested my replacement not be too cool.

I would say I am sad to go, but that is too simple a word for the variety of emotions I have swimming around my head right now. I am sad, but mostly I am drowning in warm and happy flashbacks, vinaigrette images of us all laughing in the van on long drives across America. Joe Puleo, tour manager, at the front telling a story, Jason playing quizmaster and hosting a game of “Guess the Song,” from an app he has downloaded, and we all scream out responses. Rob taking photos of the scenery on his lomo, Neil watching gangster epics on his laptop, and maybe later on this long long drive Paul and Tom will play Tiger Woods Golf whilst I work out how long I can hold my bladder for before requesting we stop. I was the most frequenter pee needer on long drives. I am not ashamed of this. I owned it.

I felt warm and safe on those drives, listening to everyone tell stories, share experiences, make each other laugh. I am lucky to have shared a hotel room with so many exceptional ladies over the years, Aleks, Harriet and especially Kim, who shared my fear of the cold, love of porridge and put up with my ability to make a mess in any room in under 5 seconds. Starting and ending the day together, we did some good chatting.

I have seen a lot of this world, and I didn’t have to go on a gap year to do it. I have travelled across the breadth and depth of the US and the UK and I have seen a lot of different faces, and sampled a lot of backstage humus.I have seen a lot of graffitied backstage cocks.

I have met and worked with countless wonderful, interesting and horrifically talented people inside the industry, inside the venues, inside the recording studie and inside our practice space. (I won’t gush too much about how talented the people in the band are, you might get diabetes from my sincerity, but it has been a pleasure and a privilege to play the music that Tom writes.)

Also fans. Fans are awesome. You made it possible for us record an album in Seattle. To play a show outside of Wales. To play in a baseball stadium in Japan. A haunted restaurant in Santa Cruz. a handful of US universities and see Mexico! I saw Mexico! You girls and guys are truly humbling, and I hope I never took you for granted too much. I probably did. Thank you for knowing the words, for bringing cakes, and books, and t-shirts, and comics, and buying us drinks and for waiting and driving miles and cheering and clapping. For reading or watching or listening to anything we have ever done. Thanks. You kept us going and will continue to be the life blood of the Los Campesinos! family.

I was trawling through old photos trying to find the best one to represent a start and an ending, but I got lost in old memories and the process of ageing.

(God we looked young, look at our skin! Look at our clothes! Cardigans and ripped up Distillers t shirts, oh I still have that.)

I have eons of photos of the band at the start, at rehearsals, house parties, with experimental hair, (mine black, Gareth long and wispy, Neil’s fringe nearly covering his eyes and Tom always wearing his hat) and at our first shows. I remember when we first started, our summer of label romance where everyone wanted to take us out for a pub meal, and all we ever did was go out in Cardiff drinking and dancing. We said we would change our last names to Campesinos! if we ever played in the states, but we tempted fate, and we never changed out names but we did get to go to America a lot.

I sometimes wonder what alternative universe me would be doing if she didn’t go to that first rehearsal in Ollie’s bedroom. I think she is picking her nose right now in a bath of baked beans, bored and crazy because she spent all day in an office sitting next to a woman who told her about the time she slept with a navy seal. No one cares Brenda.

So 500 plus gigs, millions of air miles, gallons of backstage whisky and wine, a tonne of sweaty cheese and pita bread, a litre of tears shed on stage, hundreds of “don’t fuck up,” panics, hundreds of fuck ups, hundreds of “this is blowing my mind” moments whilst starring into a sea of unfamiliar and impassioned faces, break ups and ill advised hook ups later (don’t date musicians, like ever, we’re all mental,) I realise I have seen all the travel lodges, service stations, and states of America (apart from Alaska) and I have tasted more Marks and Spencer’s meals then I thought possible. I’ve been with some of the finest people I know doing a very unnatural thing, which is both the best and the worst experience and often at the same time, but never the same any given year. And we have done it fucking well. The best we can.

God I’m being dramatic, but I can’t help it, I was a middle child.

So some more self-indulgence.

I want to thank some people for being ace. John Goodmanson – a brilliant producer and a lesson in style and grace under pressure. Joe Puleo – the best tour manager, you never feel anything but safe in his company. Kelly Pickard – inspiration, mentor, wisest woman. Paul Rattcliff- The loyalist soundman whom gives so much. Kev and Alun and Mark Bowen, Wichita, Ben and Vicky, Gareth Dobson, anyone we have toured with or supported or who I have met along the way, everyone I forgot. I haven’t forgot, I am thinking about you.

My mum, because she told me I could be anything and do anything except get my tongue pierced. And I did that anyway, and she still wasn’t mad at me.

And the band.. Kim, Jason, Gareth, Tom, Neil and Rob who I will miss sharing experiences with that no one will understand, I love you guys. Like, loads. From our first Sweet Dreams, until our last, thanks.

Okay, too long, too emo. Bye bye.

Ellen x

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“I always work off the motto of, ‘if you think you’re working hard, there’s always someone else who’s working harder’… there is nothing easy about the sport or music industries, and you have to work so hard to be successful.” - Niall Horan

On The Loose: released official fourth single from Flicker, including a radio edit, lyric video (rip), official video, behind the scenes video, Basic Tape remix, Slenderbodies remix, acoustic version, acoustic video, and vertical video So Long: performed unreleased song on piano throughout Flicker World Tour dates Mirrors EP: released on vinyl for Record Store Day 2018 Seeing Blind: released acoustic video, live video, and radio single in Australia Finally Free: released song for Smallfoot soundtrack and live video recorded at the Greek Theatre, Los Angeles Flicker (song): released as a radio single in the Netherlands Flicker featuring the RTÉ Concert Orchestra: released live album in Ireland, featuring nine songs including an official live version of previously unreleased song So Long

81 tour dates: across Europe, the Asia-Pacific, and the Americas, playing arenas, amphitheatres, state/regional fairs, and large theatres Featured opening acts & special guests: including Wild Youth (Killarney), Julia Michaels (Europe), RuthAnne (Dublin), Lewis Capaldi (Glasgow), Hailee Steinfeld (London), Maren Morris (NZ, Australia, the Americas), Jayda (Manila), Ming Bridges (Singapore), Sugar Me (Tokyo) Setlist: featured 14-15 original songs and 3-4 covers Regular covers: Dancing in the Dark (Bruce Springsteen), Crying in the Club (Camila Cabello), Drag Me Down and Fool’s Gold (One Direction) Covers for select tour dates: Dancing in the Moonlight (Thin Lizzy - Dublin night 1), Where the Street’s Have No Name (U2 - Dublin night 2), Won’t Back Down (Tom Petty - Greek Theatre LA, Red Rocks & others), New York State of Mind (Billy Joel - Jones Beach Theater, Long Island), Life in the Fast Lane (Eagles - final September tour dates) Filmed Red Rocks show: for potential future release Top 50 worldwide tours of 2018: selling more than 445,000 tickets

BBC Biggest Weekend: played a six-song set on the second day of the festival in Swansea Reputation Tour: special guest for Taylor Swift’s first night at Wembley Stadium, performing Slow Hands together RTÉ Concert Orchestra special: performed nine songs from the Flicker album for broadcast in Ireland, later broadcast in France & South Africa Sounds Like Friday Night: performed acoustic version of On The Loose & interview  New York State Fair: played the headline show on the final day of the fair Official livestream: of Flicker World Tour Amsterdam show, in partnership with Live Nation, for a global streaming audience Late Late Show: performed Slow Hands on London episode Virtual reality concert: made London Flicker Sessions show available on MelodyVR platform

Sounds Like Friday Night: interview on BBC RTE: interview with Eoghan McDermott, as part of RTE Concert Orchestra Special The Project: interview on Australian TV The Voice Australia: guest mentor with Delta Goodrem Today Show: interview on Australian TV Sunrise: interview on Australian TV Studio 10: interview on Australian TV Late Late Show: guest on London show, brief appearance on show in October

TalkSport: co-hosted breakfast radio show in January & September Dubai Desert Classic: played in Pro-Am with Rory McIlroy and a competition winner, and participated in a golf clinic, helping two of his Modest! Golf clients gain entry to the pro event US Golf Masters: ambassador for Drive, Chip & Putt competition Ladies golf: signed Maguire sisters to Modest! Golf, announced Ladies event for NI Open in 2019 Ryder Cup: played in celebrity match & Team Europe ambassador BMW PGA Championship: played in Pro-Am with the winner of a BBC Children in Need charity auction Sky Sports British Masters: played in Pro-Am Interviews: ESPN, SkySports, BBC Radio 5, Golf Channel, Bunkered, Ladies European Tour, The Irish Times, Golf Magic, among others LUFC: provoked an infamous Twitter clapback from Leeds United Modest! Golf: supported four players who have secured tour cards for 2019

Irish referendum: supported the yes vote to legalise abortion March for Our Lives: supported cousin’s participation in march for gun control US politics: publicly denounced Trump (again) US mid-term elections: urged US citizens to vote

Horan & Rose: hosted the second edition of the charity gala & golf event, upping the total money raised for charity to £1.5 million to date Charity t-shirt: released second charity t-shirt raising funds for Cancer Research UK and the Kate & Justin Rose Foundation Rays of Sunshine: hosted teens at Flicker World Tour London soundcheck & show, donated Jingle Bell Ball Santa shirt for charity raffle Charity auctions: donated items for multiple fundraisers, including a signed guitar & VIP concert experience for a Grammy auction raising $4,500 for Musicares Foundation; signed boots to a Small Steps charity auction, raising £1,130; signed artwork; signed guitar to Cystic Fibrosis Foundation auction, raising €4,000 Anti-bullying Week: supported efforts to stop cyber-bullying on Twitter Instituto Projeto Neymar Jr: supported Brazilian football superstar’s work providing education for kids in Praia Grande, Brazil World Cancer Day: supported Cancer Research UK’s Unity Band initiative LauraLynn Hospice: spent time with kids in hospice care before Flicker World Tour Dublin show

BBC Radio 1 Breakfast Show with Nick Grimshaw: how real are these Niall Horan ‘facts’?, can Niall Horan remember his own lyrics? BBC Radio 1 Biggest Weekend: when Niall Horan met Shawn Mendes BBC Radio 1 Biggest Weekend with Matt & Mollie: Niall Horan answers questions he’s never been asked before EW: Niall Horan listens to Dua Lipa, Springsteen and more on tour - check out his exclusive playlist Billboard Pop Shop podcast: Niall Horan on new song 'Finally Free,' 'disappearing' after tour to work on next album & 8 Years of One Direction MORE FM: Niall Horan talks about his “intimate” connection with NZ The Edge afternoons with Jono, Ben & Sharon: Niall Horan talks about being mates with Dan Carter The Edge 30: Niall Horan says NZ is his favourite country to perform in Nova 969 Smallzy’s Surgery: could new Niall Horan music be on the way? Nova 969 Smallzy's Surgery: Smallzy’s backstage tour with Niall Horan Nova 969 Fitzy & Wippa: exclusive chat On Air with Ryan Seacrest: Niall Horan recalls best Flicker World Tour moments so far FUN 107 The Michael Rock Show: Niall Horan surprising secret to great hair Walk 97.5 Christina Kay: interview Coup de Main: interview - Niall Horan on his upcoming NZ show, recording live, and honesty in writing ‘Flicker’  Coup de Main cover story: interview - eye to eye with Niall Horan GQ Italia cover story: Niall Horan: my life after One Direction George Ezra & Friends the podcast: Series 2, Episode 1 Zeit Leo: "I get restless very quickly." Singer Niall Horan has a slight obsessive-compulsive disorder. How music helps him, he tells here.

GQ Italia: Music Issue cover shoot Paul Smith: guest at Paris fashion show and spent time with the designer in his studio Revista GQ: Niall Horan is, right now, the only person who knows how to wear a shirt with undershirt as it’s done in 2018 Fashion Bean: best-dressed men of the week

US RIAA certifications: Slow Hands 3 x platinum, This Town 2 x platinum UK Official Charts certifications: Flicker x gold Australia ARIA certifications: Slow Hands 5 x platinum, Flicker x gold Canada Gold/Platinum certifications: Slow Hands 5 x platinum, Too Much To Ask x platinum Chile certification: Flicker x platinum Songwriting awards: BMI London Pop Awards Song for Slow Hands, BMI Los Angeles Award Winning Songs for Slow Hands & This Town  Spotify milestone: Flicker surpassed 1 billion streams in June 2018 Billboard #1s: achieved his 9th solo Billboard chart number 1, with Too Much To Ask reaching #1 on the Dance Club Songs Chart Billboard Year-End 2018: achieved album, song, radio, social and artist entries on the year-end charts US radio: On the Loose became Niall's fourth Top 20 single on Hot AC radio, and fourth single to chart on Mainstream Pop, Hot AC & AC radio formats, reaching #22 on pop radio Hollywood Music in Media Awards: Finally Free nominated for Original Song - Animated Film RTE Choice Music Prize: Slow Hands nominated for Irish Song of the Year iHeartRadio Awards 2018: winner of Best New Pop Artist & Best Lyrics (Slow Hands)

April: using soundchecks to come up with ideas October: wrote a tune on the piano November: ‘3 days into making tunes and it’s feeling good !!!!!’, ‘exciting watching ideas come to life in the studio’, in the studio with Julian Bunetta & John Ryan in Los Angeles I / II / III / IV, RuthAnne Cunningham tells CelebMix she will be writing with Niall for NH2 December: ‘exciting week of writing’, writing session with Jamie Scott, Mike Needle & Dan Bryer in London, ‘very much in writing mode’

Everyone loved Niall: and Niall loved everyone, but especially Hailee Steinfeld, whom he quietly dated while avoiding the media circus which often surrounds celeb relationships.

Soundcheck Q&A and Meet & Greets: made fan engagement a central part of his Flicker World Tour experience Golf events: made time for fans who came out to see him play at pro-am events Maintained boundaries: called out fans for taking creep shots & obnoxious behaviour Calmed audiences: and looked out for the wellbeing of fans at his shows, especially in Latin America Twitter & Instagram: read and responded to fan tweets and questions with a mixture of sincerity, gratitude, brutal honesty, and humour Jade: made one young fan’s night (/life) by inviting her up on stage to dance at the Allentown Fair show

Baby Marit: melted hearts everywhere offering reassurance to two new dads

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Can I ask for a small fic of MSR shopping for clothes? (fluffy stuff) :)

This ended up more NSFW than fluffy…sorry! Tagging @today-in-ficNever Too Late

It’s brooding grey andwind-whipped in the main road but Mulder is striding ahead. Clearly, thisstreetscape hasn’t changed that much in the thirty years since he’d last troddenthese cobbled pavements.

           “Really, Mulder?” she says, elbowingpast the slow-moving crowds before her. She can just see the top of his hair,disappearing into the wide entrance of Marks & Spencer.

           He’s holding a basket over his armand waiting for her next to a mannequin wearing a green striped polo tee andbeige chinos. “What do you think, Scully?”

           “I think that the day you take upgolf, is the day I’ll believe in aliens.”

           His mouth opens with a pop but she’snot going to wait for his smartass response. “Why are we here, Mulder? In thisshop? I mean, I’ve heard it’s revered by the Brits and sells sandwiches andmiddle class clothes. So, what gives? I thought you’d be taking me to Harrodsand Liberty and quaint little olde worlde tea shoppes.”

           They’re standing on the escalatorand he’s holding her elbow. The whole store reeks of wholesome, of familyvalues, of running through meadows of daisies. She catches sight of them in themirrored walls on the way up. She’s wearing her hair back in a low ponytail andwearing a fitted rain jacket in a delicate shade of blue, and he’s wearingthose skinnier jeans, darker denim and his new well-cut winter jacket incharcoal. They look like a fucking Marks & Spencer model couple. If therewas a golden retriever between them, the deal would be done. By the time, he’sdragged her to the lingerie section, she’s ripped the tie out of her hair and slungher jacket into his basket. Her figure-hugging maroon cable-knit and slim fitblack jeans look much more experienced government agent, than Football Mum orwhatever is the British equivalent of saccharine parent.

           “Again, Mulder, why are we here?”

           He’s grinning now, looking around atthe rows of underwear. “For these little beauties, Scully.”

           Sighing, she studies the garments infront of her. “Bras and panties? Really, Mulder? You couldn’t just have boughta couple of those magazines you used to like? I mean, I’m a little bit olderand more accommodating these days, maybe if you’d asked, I might have sat withyou to read through them.”

           “Accommodating, Scully? Anyway,these are not just knickers and bras,” he says and she smothers a giggle at hisuse of the local terminology. “These are Marks & Sparks knickers and bras.Everybody in the UK wears them. Think of it as a rite of passage.” He walksaround the back of the shelves. “I’ll tell you what, Scully. You just stay hereand I’ll select some items.”

           “Hey,” she says, trying not to yellas they pass a pair of older ladies with blue rinses and brown leather handbagspropped on their forearms. “What did you just pick up?”

           He swings the basket away from her. “It’smy treat, Scully.”

           “Why won’t you show me what you’vechosen? They better not be red lace thongs and see-through bras. And what sizedid you buy? They’re all different here. How do you know…”

           But he’s already gone and she squeezesher fists together and turns her grimace into a smile at the two old ladies asthey walk past again.

           “Nice rear he’s got, dear,” thefirst one says, smiling at her. “And still got all his hair. He’s a keeper.”They’re watching Mulder retreat.

           “If only we were thirty yearsyounger, Aileen,” the other one says, winking. “We could have done some damageto that one.”

She pours the wine andlays out the cutlery. For all of Marks & Spencer’s primness and reputation,it did offer a fine selection of ready meals and the smell of the balti andnaan is piquant, making her mouth water.

           “Mulder? What’s taking you so long?”He’s been in the bedroom for too long to be healthy.

           He reaches an arm out to grab herand says, “just humour me, Scully. I’ve laid out the clothes on the bed. Putthem on and then when you’re ready, knock on the door.”

           She can hear him bumping around inthe living room but she’s already two glasses of Prosecco down and she decidesto indulge him. Rain splatters the window as she knocks.

           “Mulder?”

           “Oh, hi,” he says. “Come on in.” He’sholding a candle and he’s wearing a smile with his a soft grey tee-shirt undera pale denim shirt.

           It takes a moment to sink in, butthe blast of rain at the door jogs her memory. She turns her back on him andlets the red robe sink to the floor. She pushes out her backside and twists herheard over her shoulder. “What are they?”

           The flickering flame of the candleis so close to her skin that she feels the heat. He runs it up and down herback and looks up at her. “You know what, Scully? When you knocked at my doorthat first case, I thought you were coming on to me. You dropped that robe andyou were wearing that underwear, so plain but so sexy, and I thought to myself,well, this is a surprise.” He stands and pulls the hair from her shoulder,kissing the nexus of her neck and shoulder with reverence.

           “Would you have slept with me?Senior agent that you were?”

           He doesn’t stop kissing for a whileand she feels her nipples peak. “Yes. I didn’t think you’d last one case. I didmy best to piss you off enough that you would beg for a reassignment.”

           “And fucking me would have pissed meoff?”

           He hooks his thumbs under the sidesof her bra cups and brushes her tender nipples. “Probably. I would haveselfishly taken everything I wanted and not bothered with making you happy. Iwas an asshole back then.”

           She turns and lets him bury his nosein her cleavage. “Still are sometimes, Mulder.” Her head flops back and shefeels the tickle of her hair against her back. The robe is pooled at theirfeet, lush red. The satin of the bra cup shines in the candlelight. He’s takingoff the panties and kissing her lower stomach. “Is it too late to make up for myassholery, Scully?” His lips are pushing into her centre and she’s running herhands through his hair, holding him there.

           “It’s never too late, Mulder.”

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Title: Hooking Him Series: How to Catch an Alpha #3

Author: Aurora Rose Reynolds Publisher: Montlake Romance

Genre: Contemporary Romance Release Date: June 16, 2020

Blurb

Anna McAlister needs a new life. But that doesn’t mean she needs a new man. After leaving her fiancé and Chicago behind, she promises herself no dating until she finds what she’s looking for. But meeting one seriously hot and determined detective has her questioning herself.

Calvin Miller is that detective, and he’s been burned by women in the past. It’s easy for him to sleep alone and focus on his work, but the moment he lays eyes on Anna, he starts imagining sexy nights with her wrapped in his sheets. Maybe it’s time to get back out there.

But just as the attraction between them begins to sizzle, Anna’s past shows up to create trouble. And to make matters worse, a string of murders forces Calvin to juggle his new relationship and his career. His worst fear? That the two are somehow connected.

Can they find love together, or will her past and his duty sink their hopes?

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Excerpt

Suggestion 1

FIRST IMPRESSIONS ARE EVERYTHING. DIDN’T YOUR MAMA TEACH YOU THAT?

ANNA

“Are you happy?” my friend Lucy asks, and I instinctively tighten my fingers around my cell phone as I put my bare feet up on the wooden rail in front of me. I’ve lived most of my life in the city, surrounded by skyscrapers and the constant sound of chatter and traffic, with air clogged with the scents of food and exhaust. Now, sitting on the back deck of my studio apartment in a small coastal town in South Carolina, with the ocean mere feet away, the sun warming my skin, and a slight breeze playing in my hair, I wonder how I survived in Chicago for so long.

“I’m getting there,” I answer, smiling as I watch a young family laughing and playing in the surf nearby.

“Even living in a small studio apartment and working at a bakery?” She sounds skeptical, and I remind myself she just doesn’t understand. Like everyone else back in Chicago, she doesn’t get why I’d choose to go from making over $60,000 a year, living in a beautiful penthouse apartment, planning a wedding to a good man—who also happens to be gorgeous—to moving to a town where I know almost no one. Where I’m renting an apartment the size of my old bathroom and working a job that pays in a month what I used to make in a week.

“Even living in an apartment and working at the bakery,” I reply, keeping my tone neutral before adding quietly, “I do miss you, though.” It’s not a lie: Lucy has been in my life since I can remember. Our parents were friends, so we practically grew up together.

“I still don’t get it,” she says with a sigh, and my heart sinks. I keep hoping she will, but as the months pass, it’s becoming more and more clear that she won’t. None of my friends or family do. They don’t understand that I didn’t just wake up one day and decide to give everything up. Every day for years, I woke up and looked at myself in the mirror, disliking the materialistic, shallow woman I was becoming. Until one day I decided to do something about it.

“I should let you go. I’m sure you have stuff to do, and I promised Edie that I’d go with her to bingo.”

“Bingo? You’re playing bingo?” She laughs.

I can’t help the smile that tips up my lips. “Yeah, it’s actually kind of fun.”

“If you say so,” she says, sounding distracted, and then a moment later, a distinctive male voice in the background asks her something, and I know it’s Lance, my ex-fiancé, who’s a partner at her firm. “Sorry, I gotta go, Anna.”

“No problem,” I tell her, feeling nauseous. “Bye.” I hang up before she has a chance to reply and then sit forward, dropping my head into my hands as I think back to the look on Lance’s face when I gave him back his ring and told him that we were over. He didn’t say a word and walked away, looking devastated. The hardest part about leaving Chicago wasn’t the lifestyle I was giving up; it was losing him. Even though I wasn’t in love with him, he was my friend. For the five years we were in a relationship, he was a constant in my life, someone I depended on for support, and he was one of the few people who understood the dysfunctional relationship I had with my parents and encouraged me to take a step back from them when they hurt me with their carelessness.

Not wanting to spend the day dwelling on something that would leave me depressed, I pull in a deep breath, expecting to inhale the fresh sea air, but my nose wrinkles when the distinct scent of pot hits me. I open my eyes, get up from my lounger, and stop midway across the deck when a big puff of smoke floats up from the porch below. I walk quietly to the edge and look over the rail, wondering if someone from the beach has decided to hide out and get high. But then I shake my head when I see Dixie and Pearl, my landlady Edie’s best friends, who are in their seventies, standing at her back door and sharing what looks like a joint: an object that seems out of place, given their grandmotherly appearance. Both women are dressed like they’re about to go golfing, in their pastel polo shirts and khaki capris, all capped by white hair that’s styled, like always, in an array of curls.

“Isn’t weed illegal?”

Both women jump, and Dixie, who’s holding the joint, tosses it away, yelling “Oh shit!” while Pearl screams, searching until she finds me on the deck above.

“Anna!” Pearl says, glaring. “You scared the dickens out of me.”

“Dickens,” Dixie says with a giggle as the back door opens.

“What on earth is going on out here?” Edie asks, stepping outside wearing a white linen outfit with her short hair feathered back from a gracefully aging face.

“Anna tried to give us heart attacks,” Pearl says accusingly, pointing up at me, and Edie tips her head back, smiling when she spots me.

Edie was the first person I met when I moved to South Carolina. She had an apartment for rent in her house, and when I answered the ad, she invited me over to view the space. I fell in love with it because it was right on the beach, but after spending an hour with her, I also wanted the apartment because it would give me an excuse to spend time with her. I didn’t understand why I was so drawn to her at first, but something about being in her presence made me feel hopeful. Then one night, over wine, she opened up about her past and told me about her ex-husband, who she was with for more than twenty years before she found the courage to leave him. And when she did, she found a way to be happy, even when he and her family were all sure she would come back with her tail tucked between her legs. I guess her story gave me the hope to fight for my own happiness.

“They’re smoking weed,” I inform her, waving my hand at both women.

“I have glaucoma.” Pearl plants her hands on her hips.

“Really?” I ask, and her eyes narrow on mine in challenge.

“It’s time for us to go anyway,” Edie announces.

“Found it!” Dixie shouts, and Pearl breaks her stare-down with me to turn to her friend, who holds up the joint like it’s a trophy.

“Anna.” My eyes move to Edie. “Meet us at the car. I want to get to the bingo hall before Carol so she doesn’t take our table.”

“That woman is annoying,” Dixie mutters.

“She’s such a show-off,” Pearl says, taking the joint from Dixie and wrapping what’s left of it in a tissue she pulls from her bra. “Who cares that you have five grandkids when they don’t even like you?”

“Right!” Dixie agrees while opening the door for Pearl to go inside before her.

“Meet us in the driveway,” Edie says, and I narrow my eyes on hers. “What?”

“I notice you’re not saying anything about them smoking pot. Did you smoke with them?”

“Not today.” She winks, then disappears inside. I watch the door close behind her, unsure if she’s joking. She, Pearl, and Dixie might all be older than me, but you’d never know by the way they act and the things they say.

“Well, today should be interesting,” I sigh to myself before going into my apartment and shutting the door. I walk between my bed and the open kitchen to the closet and slide my feet into a pair of flip-flops before grabbing a plaid button-down shirt and tying it around my waist. I learned the first time Edie dragged me to the bingo hall that they keep the room a degree above freezing—something that wouldn’t have been bad if I hadn’t dressed for the heat and humidity outside. I stop and grab my keys, along with my purse, then lock up before taking the stairs down to the driveway, where Edie, Dixie, and Pearl are waiting.

“I can drive.” I hold up the keys to my Ford, and they all turn in my direction.

“Where’s the rest of your shorts?” Pearl asks, and I look down at my denim cutoffs, which are short but not any shorter than what girls wear nowadays. Still, they’re shorter than anything I would’ve worn a year ago.

“Oh, stop. If you had legs like hers, you’d show them off too,” Edie scolds, and I glance up, catching her shaking her head at her friend before she looks at me. “Anna, you drive like an old lady. You’re riding shotgun. Get in.” She presses a button on her keys, and the doors unlock.

“I don’t drive like an old lady,” I say to defend myself as I open the door to her red BMW convertible and pull the seat forward for Pearl and Dixie to get in the back.

“The last time I rode with you, you drove thirty in a fifty.”

“It was a construction zone. I was following the rules.”

“It was after eight at night. They weren’t even working.”

“Whatever.” I push the seat back into place and get in. I reach for my seat belt as she starts the engine and lowers the roof. As soon as the top locks into place, she backs out of the driveway, and I’m reaching out for the handle on the door when I hear her laugh.

“Relax, child. I’ve never gotten in an accident.”

“Really?” I glance at her quickly, not wanting to take my eyes off the road, even though I’m not the one driving.

“Well . . . maybe I should say I have never gotten into an accident that was my fault.”

“That sounds a little more believable,” I reply, then pull in a sharp breath as she turns onto the on-ramp for the highway and presses her foot more firmly on the gas. I hold my breath as she merges into traffic and then squeeze my eyes closed as she zooms forward to pass in front of a semi. I feel the car start to slow and open my eyes. I release the breath I’ve been holding as we take the next exit and stop at a red light. When the light turns green, my fingers tighten on the handle of the door, turning my knuckles white as she takes a right and presses the gas once more. I start to pray when she hugs the bumper of the car in front of us, and then my heart drops into my stomach when I hear the distinctive sound of police sirens.

“Oh shit,” comes from the back seat as Edie pulls over and places the car in park. I look over my shoulder and watch Pearl reach into her shirt, pull out a white tissue, and shove it under the seat in front of her.

Oh my God. “Was that your joint?” I shout, and Pearl glares at me.

“Just be cool. This isn’t a big deal.” Edie wraps her hand around my upper leg, and I focus on her and nod, not feeling cool at all. My leg starts to bounce as we wait for the officer to get out of his car, and by the time he gets to Edie’s window, it’s jumping like crazy.

“Edie.”

A deep voice greets us, and I turn my head, noticing first the long, masculine fingers wrapped around the top of the door, then dark jeans, a black belt with a badge attached, and a form-fitting blue button-down that’s tucked in, making it clear the guy is fit. I slowly lift my head as I take in his broad shoulders, and my heart starts to pound for a different reason when I reach his face. Holy wow, even with his eyes covered with a pair of silver aviators that look amazing on him, he’s still heart-stoppingly gorgeous. I stare at him, unsure if it’s his dark hair, sharp jaw, or full lips that have me entranced. All I know is it’s a good thing he has those glasses on. I don’t think I could handle seeing all of him at one time.

“Calvin, how’s your mom?” Pearl asks sweetly from the back seat, and he turns his head just slightly to look at her while I keep my eyes on him. Calvin—that name fits him. It makes me think of those old Calvin Klein ads with Marky Mark that my friends and I used to drool over.

“She’s good.”

“Tell her I say hello.”

“Will do.” He dips his chin before shifting his attention back to Edie. “Do you know why I pulled you over?”

“I have no idea,” Edie says. Then she asks, “Was I speeding?”

“You weren’t speeding. But I followed you onto the highway and off, and I’m a little concerned with your lack of turn signals and the way you tend to test the boundaries of your brakes when driving behind someone.”

“My car has great brakes,” she informs him with a smile.

“That might be, but I doubt you’d feel that way if the person you followed so closely had to hit their brakes and you, in turn, hit them.”

“You’re absolutely right.” She places her hand on her chest, looking surprised. “I never thought of that.”

“I’m sure.” His jaw tics, making my fingers, still on the handle, clench. “If I see you driving like that again, Edie, I’ll give you a ticket. And you and I both know you can’t have any more points on your license.”

Points? She already has points on her license?

“How many tickets have you gotten?” I blurt, and all eyes rest on me, including a pair covered with a silver tint.

“I still have my license,” Edie tells me.

“One more ticket and you won’t,” Calvin adds.

“One more ticket” meaning she’s gotten a few? “I knew I should have ignored my need to respect my elders and demanded to drive. First, Pearl and Dixie smoking a—”

“Pardon?” Calvin rumbles, cutting off the word joint, and my eyes widen. Oh crap. My mouth goes dry. I wave my hand in his direction and shake my head once more. “They were smoking a cigarette. Even at their age, they should know those things kill.” I can’t see his eyes, but I still feel them bore into mine. I shift in my seat but try to keep my expression neutral. “I’ll make sure Edie’s more careful when she’s behind the wheel.”

He acknowledges my statement with a grunt and comes out of his bent position, which forces me to tip my head back. “This is your last warning.” He taps Edie’s door before he walks back toward his car. I turn to watch him, thinking even from behind, his broad shoulders and slim waist are attractive.

“I can’t believe you were going to tell him that we were smoking a joint,” Pearl hisses.

“She didn’t and she covered for us,” Dixie mutters. “I don’t blame her for getting weird. He’s handsome, and that happens when you’re talking to a handsome man.”

“Do you think he’s handsome?” Edie asks me, and I look over at her, noting a calculating look in her eyes.

Damn.

“Of course she thinks he’s attractive. She’s female,” Pearl says from the back seat.

“Well?” Edie asks.

“Um . . .” I shift under her stare. “He’s okay.”

“Okay?” Dixie snorts. “That man is not just okay, darling, and if you think that, you need to be checked by a doctor to confirm you actually have a pulse.”

“Whatever. Shouldn’t we go? Aren’t you the one who didn’t want to be late to bingo?”

“Fine, you win this one,” Edie says after a long moment, and then she puts the shifter in drive, flips on her turn signal, and checks her mirror. The moment she starts to pull away from the side of the road and into traffic, the car is jolted to the right, and the sounds of metal crunching and scraping fill the air.

With wide eyes and my heart pounding, I turn and meet a pair of mesmerizing blue eyes belonging to Calvin. Holy cow, we just sideswiped a cop! I drag my eyes off his and focus on Edie. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine. Are you?” Her eyes scan me from head to toe.

“I’m good.” I look over my shoulder and see Calvin backing up behind us, then look at the two wide-eyed women in the back seat. “Are you two all right?”

“I’m okay,” Pearl says shakily.

“Just a little shook up, but I’m okay,” Dixie replies.

“I’m going to make sure Calvin is all right.” I unhook my belt and open my door.

With my legs shaking, I walk around the back of the car, but I stop short when I see Calvin bent over and looking in the open trunk of his cruiser. Without even a glance in my direction, he booms, “Get back into the vehicle.”

“But—”

“Back in the vehicle.” He doesn’t move except to turn his head, and his eyes come to me. “It’s not safe for you to be out here.”

“I just wanted to make sure you were okay,” I tell him, and he comes out of his bent position and walks toward me slowly.

I should back away. I want to back away, but I hold my ground until he reaches out and wraps his hand around my upper arm.

“What are you doing?” I look at where he’s holding me and automatically try to tug free, but he doesn’t let go. Instead, he starts walking, forcing me to go with him. When we reach the passenger side of the car, he opens the door and urges me to sit.

“Stay,” he orders, and I blink up at him in disbelief.

“I’m not a dog you can just order to do something,” I hiss, tucking my feet into the car.

“Yeah, I know. My dog actually listens.” He slams the door and walks away, leaving me fuming.

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AUDIO / PAPERBACK

Author Bio

Aurora Rose Reynolds is a New York Times, USA Today and Wall Street Journal bestselling author whose wildly popular series include Until, Until Him, Until Her, Underground Kings and Shooting Stars.

Her writing career started in an attempt to get the outrageously alpha men who resided in her head to leave her alone and has blossomed into an opportunity to share her stories with readers all over the world.

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