#late but here i am

[ilaanized]

My two sh’s are the best girls in the world. I love them to life and beyond. They’ve always managed to put a smile to my face no matter the circumstances or situation. There’s so much I can talk to them without hesitation or having a doubt in my mind that I’m doing something wrong by saying so; and that means everything to me. Allah has a time for everything and even though I wished I knew them way before - although shah shah and I knew each other before we’ve not gotten as close as we are now and I cherish every bit of it, basically my best friend here, my one and only soulmate. And, Shrey is a little sister that I’ve never had. My baboi, my shonapakhi, my dovie. Always wanted a sibling and she filled that space for me, one that could never be replaced. @isapphire 🕊️ @shayx3 🦢.

My begum; urf Rani, is the guardian angel who never fails to check up on me. There’s always something I’ll say on my account and moments after would come her response asking me if I’m okay. The amount of appreciation I feel is unmatched. Everyone has ups and downs in their friendships and how we care about each other shows that we could pull through it again and over. I’m so grateful to have someone like you to call my friend. @papill0nsgf 🦕.

I know we don’t talk much but you’ve been the first to interact with me here and checked up on me as well. I absolutely adore your aesthetics and I hope to talk more with you @chaeflm 🌷.

You, I’m glad we got to talk again. I’ve missed you and thank you for talking everything out with me. @uremoboys 🪐.

We lost our old convo and our daily mewlings cause my account decided to deactivate on me </3 miss you and we should talk more @hoonieq can’t tag you either 🥹.

@strluv @yunnjie @juyokiss @shn-ryjn @shuacelest @yejiimg @isachxrm @osfprk @hoonietoons I haven’t got to speak to you all yet, but I hope we could get to talk more 🥺💗.

Happy Valentine’s Day to all you, sweethearts! Hope you’re all enjoying or have enjoyed your day so far.

[lovetositinsilence]

a moment for themselves

[puncertainty]

you know that one team member who takes all the credit but does none of the work

[hinamie]

long way home

[ruporas]

trigunned the hades or hadesed the trigun (id in alt)

[shima-draws]

Drops this here and pretends like I'm not over a week late to @oprarepairweek 😳

Day 4 is clothing swap!! You can't tell me that Law would NOT lose his mind fanboying if he ever got to wear the Germa 66 raid suit, come on. LMAO

[krysmcscience]

Call this the Whoopsie AU (it's barely an AU)

I mean. Narinder never explicitly SAID the Lamb would stay dead... :3c He probably should have been more specific. >:3c

Part Two:

Well. The Lamb tried, but...sorry, Nari, the crown hates you now. Shouldn't have been so quick to lend it out, I guess. :D

Aaaand Part Three:

'Isn't he just adorable?' -The Lamb, probably, while their followers smile and nod and internally scream at the brand new hellcat they now have to share living space with...

Anyway, nothing says 'Dead To Me' like following a person around to loudly remind them of how dead they are to you. Right? Right. Narinder's got this all figured out. <:]

[inkskinned]

at some point it's just like. do they even fucking like the thing they're asking AI to make? "oh we'll just use AI for all the scripts" "we'll just use AI for art" "no worries AI can write this book" "oh, AI could easily design this"

like... it's so clear they've never stood in the middle of an art museum and felt like crying, looking at a piece that somehow cuts into your marrow even though the artist and you are separated by space and time. they've never looked at a poem - once, twice, three times - just because the words feel like a fired gun, something too-close, clanging behind your eyes. they've never gotten to the end of the movie and had to arrive, blinking, back into their body, laughing a little because they were holding their breath without realizing.

"oh AI can mimic style" "AI can mimic emotion" "AI can mimic you and your job is almost gone, kid."

... how do i explain to you - you can make AI that does a perfect job of imitating me. you could disseminate it through the entire world and make so much money, using my works and my ideas and my everything.

and i'd still keep writing.

i don't know there's a word for it. in high school, we become aware that the way we feel about our artform is a cliche - it's like breathing. over and over, artists all feel the same thing. "i write because i need to" and "my music is how i speak" and "i make art because it's either that or i stop existing." it is such a common experience, the violence and immediacy we mean behind it is like breathing to me - comes out like a useless understatement. it's a cliche because we all feel it, not because the experience isn't actually persistent. so many of us have this ... fluttering urgency behind our ribs.

i'm not doing it for the money. for a star on the ground in some city i've never visited. i am doing it because when i was seven i started taking notebooks with me on walks. i am doing it because in second grade i wrote a poem and stood up in front of my whole class to read it out while i shook with nerves. i am doing it because i spent high school scribbling all my feelings down. i am doing it for the 16 year old me and the 18 year old me and the today-me, how we can never put the pen down. you can take me down to a subatomic layer, eviscerate me - and never find the source of it; it is of me. when i was 19 i named this blog inkskinned because i was dramatic and lonely and it felt like the only thing that was actually permanently-true about me was that this is what is inside of me, that the words come up over everything, coat everything, bloom their little twilight arias into every nook and corner and alley

"we're gonna replace you". that is okay. you think that i am writing to fill a space. that someone said JOB OPENING: Writer Needed, and i wrote to answer. you think one raindrop replaces another, and i think they're both just falling. you think art has a place, that is simply arrives on walls when it is needed, that is only ever on demand, perfect, easily requested. you see "audience spending" and "marketability" and "multi-line merch opportunity"

and i see a kid drowning. i am writing to make her a boat. i am writing because what used to be a river raft has long become a fully-rigged ship. i am writing because you can fucking rip this out of my cold dead clammy hands and i will still come back as a ghost and i will still be penning poems about it.

it isn't even love. the word we use the most i think is "passion". devotion, obsession, necessity. my favorite little fact about the magic of artists - "abracadabra" means i create as i speak. we make because it sluices out of us. because we look down and our hands are somehow already busy. because it was the first thing we knew and it is our backbone and heartbreak and everything. because we have given up well-paying jobs and a "real life" and the approval of our parents. we create because - the cliche again. it's like breathing. we create because we must.

you create because you're greedy.

[slfcare]

one day you’ll yearn for the person you are now, to tell them, "hey, look, it turned out to be okay" and "i’m so grateful you’ve held on" and "things just worked out somehow". you’ll want to hold their hand and give them the wisdom that the future is actually better, and you know it because you’re living it. but you can’t reach through time like that. the only way to bridge the gap between the you of today and the you who’s doing better, is to hold onto the hope that they exist. 

[maimais]

happy 5th anniversary fire emblem three houses!!!🎉 thank you changing my brain chemistry forever

[llitchilitchi]

Slovak Miku!

[arsenicflame]

Bonus round! Do you use a queue tag?

[bytesyzd]

dark angel module mikuuuuuu!!!!

[tshortik]

Cryptic visions of space and time...

[aslaanjade]

#walking with your bf be like...

[yooboobies]

Does it ever drive you crazy Just how fast the night changes? | for @jung-koook ♡

{cr. 0613data, ouranxingg}