#leaving Robin to comfort Nancy when Vecna tries to get her.

[sattlersquarry]

orange juice (steve harrington x fem!reader)

Summary: (Post Season 4 AU) Steve's world changes in the worst way when he loses you. He struggles to move on...but he learns he might not have to when he miraculously gets a second chance with you.

Word Count: ~8k

Warnings: 18+ PLEASE!!!! for language, death, grief, alcoholism, mentions of sex, mention of alcohol poisoning, and an allusion to a suicide attempt (in a miscommunication!!!! no one actually tried). the reader is presumed dead after the events of season 4. lots of angst and hurt/comfort with a happy ending bc if I ever wrote something without a happy ending my identity has been stolen. inspired by "orange juice" by noah kahan with some other references to his music sprinkled throughout.

a/n: i've been bouncing between this and bloom for the past few months and they are two very different fics tonally, but i hope you enjoy. please let me know if i missed any warnings because this one is kind of heavy.

🍊🍊🍊

ORANGE JUICE

MAY 1986

A ringing phone rouses Steve from a restless sleep.

A near-empty bottle of gin rests on the floor by his bed. He doesn’t remember drinking it, nor does he remember anything else from last night.

It’s been two months since you died. Steve’s not taking it well. 

That horrible day, Steve, Nancy, and Robin ran from the Creel House and found Eddie and Dustin sobbing over you, your eyes lifeless and the wounds on your abdomen weeping.

I’m so s-sorry, Steve, Dustin had said through sobs. W-we tried to save her!

An aftershock of the initial gate-opening earthquake caused panic amongst their group. Steve wanted to carry your body back to the real world for a proper burial, but there was no time before the aftershock got much too intense. Dustin and Robin refused to leave the Upside Down without him. He wasn’t going to let them get hurt, so despite the fact it broke his soul in half to do so, he allowed his friends to drag him back to the gate in the Upside Down’s version of the Munson trailer, leaving you behind.

When the dust settled and reality set in that Steve was going to have to move on without you, grief overtook him. He turned to alcohol as a welcome distraction. He’s been consistently ignoring Robin’s desperate pleas for him to talk to a professional, to drink less, to try and really process his pain.

Steve should listen, but he won’t. Instead, he’ll grieve. He’ll wallow. He’d rather wither away into nothing than work on bettering himself, because you died and that’s not fair. To you, to him. To everyone who loves you.

Steve groans, a deep rumbling thing from deep in chest, as he stretches and rubs sleep out of his eyes. He blindly reaches for the phone on his nightstand.

“Hello?” he mumbles.

“Steve, hey.”

Steve sits up like a rocket at the tremble in Robin’s voice.

“Robin? Is everything okay?”

“Uh, kind of. I mean, yes! But no. Sorry, I just—can you come to Hopper’s?”

“What is it?” Steve asks. He staggers to his feet, getting tangled in the phone cord. “Is it Vecna? Shit, who did he take?”

“No one!” Robin says, voice way too high to be believable. “Please just come over when you can.”

Steve drives over to their basecamp at Hopper’s cabin, a million bad scenarios racing through his head. What if Vecna cursed Dustin? Or Nancy, or any of the others?

What if somehow he got El, and the Hawkins’ team was really doomed?

It takes Steve almost forty minutes to get to Hopper’s, due to earthquake damage and military roadblocks all over town. He raises his hand to knock on the door, but it swings open before he can.

Joyce smiles at him, but her eyes are mournful.

“Hi, Steve,” she says warmly. “Please, come inside.”

This isn’t what Steve expected. Hopper, El, Will, Jonathan, Nancy, and Robin are sitting on various chairs and couches in the cabin’s main room. Usually, it’s frantic around here: everyone running around with mixtapes, weapons, and crudely drawn maps of the town with markings where the most frequent monster attacks are. It’s never this still.

When Steve and Joyce walk in, everyone looks at him, sympathy in their eyes.

Steve’s first thought: Shit, is this an intervention?

Before he can ask, Hopper says: “The gates are closed, Steve.”

Steve’s mouth twists into a frown, heart pounding in his chest. That wasn’t the plan.

“Wait, what? How?”

“We’re not sure,” Joyce says. “But Will—”

“I can’t feel Vecna anymore,” Will explains. “And El checked this morning, and she found Vecna in the Void and…”

“He’s gone,” El says quietly. “Dead. Finally.”

Steve sinks onto a couch cushion. That should be good news. Steve should be celebrating, toasting to the death of the bastard that ruined his life and took you away by way of the demobats. But—

“We were supposed to go back,” Steve says. The back of his throat burns when he swallows hard, trying to choke down the sensation of nausea that’s either from his hangover or his panic. Or both. “We were going to go back and get Y/N’s body.”

“I’m sorry, Steve,” Jonathan says, looking down at his feet.

Steve whirls to Hopper, eyes blazing with a flash of anger that never seems to leave him these days.

“You promised!” he yells. “You promised that we’d go back for her!”

“I know,” Hopper says, keeping his voice even. “But something—or someone—killed Vecna in the Upside Down and the gates closed. The fight is done. It’s over.”

Steve’s lip wobbles. He won’t cry in front of them. He won’t. But his head spins.

“What am I going to tell her parents?” Steve says, voice cracking.

“You don’t have to do it alone, Steve,” Nancy says. She reaches a hand to touch his shoulder and Steve bats it away. “Steve—”

“This is such bullshit,” Steve snaps, turning to Hopper again. “If you had let me go back down there before, I could have brought her body back. We could’ve given her a proper funeral. Given her parents closure! But you made me wait!”

“It was the right choice,” Hopper says firmly. “I didn’t want to invoke another Vecna attack on Hawkins until we were ready to fight.”

“Maybe there’s a gate that we missed and—”

“We checked the gates this morning,” Robin says softly. “They’re all closed.”

“I’m sorry, Steve,” Joyce says. “But it’s over.”

Steve doesn’t say anything else. He storms out of the cabin, ignoring Robin’s pleas to come back, to not be alone right now. Steve drives back home, not without stopping at the liquor store first and loading up on various spirits to numb the pain.

Over the next week, you go from declared missing to officially declared dead. Steve can’t let on to your parents that he had known for months, and Hopper doesn’t want him to tell them the truth about Vecna, demobats, and the Upside Down. It kills Steve to lie to their faces, to attend the funeral where they bury an empty casket, knowing what he knows. Knowing that your body is trapped in another dimension. Dead and alone.

🍊🍊🍊

NOVEMBER 1986

“Y/N wouldn’t want this.”

Robin’s words echo in Steve’s mind hours after she’s fallen asleep in the uncomfortable armchair next to his hospital bed.

An overindulgence forced Steve to spend his Thanksgiving in a hospital—not that he had any plans with his family to get ruined anyway. Although he had been invited to Thanksgiving with the Buckleys, Wheelers, Hopper-Byerses, Sinclairs, Hendersons, Mayfields, and Munsons, Steve declined every invitation. He resigned himself to a holiday alone without you, got heavy handed with a bottle of whiskey, and passed out in the neighbor’s lawn.

When he awoke, he was in the hospital. Joyce and Robin were there, the former fretting over him and the latter chewing him out for being such a dingus and scaring her so badly on a holiday.

Like a broken record in his head of the worst song Steve’s ever heard: Y/N wouldn’t want this. Y/N wouldn’t want this. Y/N wouldn’t want this.

Robin didn’t say it to be mean. She said it to get him to wake up. To cool it with the drinking, because if he kept going at the rate he was going, he’d meet a worse fate than a pumped stomach.

Joyce quietly reenters the room and smiles.

“Oh, you’re still up!” she says. “I thought for sure you’d try to get some sleep.”

Steve shrugs.

“I can’t stop thinking about all the ways I’ve screwed up.”

Joyce settles on the chair next to Robin’s, ignoring the sleeping girl’s loud snores.

“When I can’t stop replaying the past in my mind,” Joyce says, “I try to think about my future instead. What are my aspirations and goals? What can I do differently to achieve them?”

Steve chews his bottom lip.

“Is it bad if I have no goals?” he says, feeling quite sorry for himself.

“Why do you think that is?” Joyce asks gently.

Steve shrugs again, before rubbing his eyes.

“Shit, I don’t know. Maybe because I’ve spent the past 3 years on edge thinking I’m going to get killed at any minute?”

Steve barks out a hollow laugh. “Or maybe it’s because 2 years ago I met someone who turned my life completely around, and she did get killed, and I wasn’t there to save her or be with her when she died. And I couldn’t give her or her parents a proper end and every time I close my eyes, I see her laying there. And I don’t know what my future looks like without her. I don’t even think I want one.”

Steve hates crying in front of other people. But when Joyce wraps an arm around his shoulders, he breaks down.

“It’s going to be all right, Steve,” she says. She squeezes him a little tighter. “I know it’s hard moving on from loss, but you do have a future. You have so many people that love you and are going to help you figure it out. And Y/N would want you to keep going. She’d want you to go off and do wonderful things.”

Joyce was right. If roles were reversed, Steve would want you to keep going without him. Not waste away and drink yourself into a coma.

Steve’s life is changing. And despite everything, things might be looking up.

🍊🍊🍊

FEBRUARY 1987

There is a beautiful girl in Steve’s bed and she’s touching him all the ways he likes to be touched—but he can’t even enjoy it because she’s not you.

He tries to clear his mind of all distraction. The girl with him—Molly—is very, very hot. And the feeling of her hands all over him should be sufficient to keep him focused on the moment. But his mind keeps wandering to you.

You were the last person he was truly intimate with. Sure, he’s kissed girls at parties. But that’s different than what’s happening now. Different than being in bed with Molly and her wandering hands, her gentle touches, her salacious whispers.

Steve thinks maybe he’s finally done it. Found a girl that can help him move on from you, the girl to help him feel whole again. To not feel so alone.

But then, overcome with sensation, Steve makes the worst possible faux pas in bed: he moans the wrong name.

Molly ceases kissing him.

“What did you just call me?” she asks, sitting up suddenly with narrowed eyes.

Steve sits up as well, resting against his headboard and floundering for a response that won’t make him sound like a douchebag.

“I just, uh, well—”

“Who is she?” Molly asks. She widens her eyes in horror. “Oh my god, are you seeing someone else? Am I ‘the other woman’?!”

“It’s nothing like that,” Steve rushes to assure her. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to. I just got caught up in the moment.”

“Caught up in the moment thinking of someone else when I was about to blow you!” Molly snaps. She stomps off the bed and grumbles as she pulls her jeans and sweatshirt back on.

“Wait, hold on!” Steve says. He struggles to put a pair of sweatpants on, hopping around frantically one-footed to pull them up as Molly grabs her purse and yanks open Steve’s bedroom door. “Please don’t leave, Y/N—ah, Molly!”

“Unbelievable!” Molly scoffs as she stomps down the staircase of the townhome Steve shares with three other students at the University of Indiana.

Molly gets to the front door but stops, whipping around to face Steve as he catches up to her.

“Who is she?” she demands. “An ex-girlfriend?”

“In a sense, yeah, but—”

“If you’re still so hung up on her, maybe you should ask her to blow you instead!”

Steve thinks about being an asshole. About letting the anger that simmers in his bloodstream 24/7 rear its ugly head. About snapping at Molly, telling her that yeah, totally, he’d love to get a blowjob from a corpse stuck in an alternate dimension.

But then Molly would feel bad and give him the pitying look Steve hates. So instead, he says, “Yeah, I’ll do that. See you in class.”

Molly huffs before giving Steve’s cheek a sharp smack! He doesn’t wince. Upset at his lack of reaction, Molly storms out.

Just as well. Remembering how the love of his life is dead is a real mood killer.

Steve rubs his forehead and heads to the kitchen. He eyes the six pack in the fridge. He hasn’t touched alcohol in three months. The temptation causes his hand to graze a beer can, but he quickly pivots to a cartoon of orange juice.

He chugs the drink before stalking up the steps to his room. Steve drops to his knees and blindly reaches in the dusty space under his bed. He grips the corner of a box and drags it to the middle of the floor.

Once opened, two black button eyes stare back up at Steve. It’s Lambchop, a stuffed animal lamb that your parents gave him. After your parents held a small funeral and buried that empty casket, they gave Steve this box of your things.

Lambchop here was her favorite toy, your mother had said at the time, eyes glistening with tears. She always hoped to pass it on to her own children one day. I think she’d want you to have it.

Steve thanked your mother and father, gave his condolences, went home, drank enough whiskey to fell a horse, and passed out.

Shaking himself out of the memory, Steve climbs onto the bed and places the lamb on the pillow next to him. It’s one of few connections to you that he has left, so he’ll cherish it, even if it’s a little silly.

What Steve doesn’t realize is that in another dimension, the very person he’s yearning for lays in the version of her bedroom created by the Upside Down, holds a dirty version of Lambchop, and yearns for Steve right back.

🍊🍊🍊

MAY 1987

You and Steve used to have your futures mapped out: start at U of I together in fall of ’86. Move in together after your freshman year of college. Get engaged by fall of ’89, married in fall of ’90, and have two kids by ’95. Spend the rest of your lives together, happy and healthy, with the horrors of Hawkins far behind you.

That was before Steve’s world changed in the worst way. Before you died in the Upside Down, when you drew the bats away from the gate. You were a hero, trying to keep them from flying into your version of Hawkins and destroying it.

Steve struggled for a long time. He’s still struggling, but in a slightly better place.

He’s sober six months now. He thinks of you often, but he tries to focus less on how he desperately misses you and more on how you wouldn’t want him to spend the rest of his life miserable and drunk.

But he does miss you so, so desperately. And he would give anything to have you back.

It hurts being reminded of you, so Steve stays away from Hawkins. But he can’t say no when Mrs. Henderson invites him to Dustin’s sweet sixteen birthday party, so he makes the trek back.

“Steve!” Mrs. Henderson coos, opening the front door with a beaming smile. “Welcome!”

“Hi, Mrs. Henderson,” Steve says. She pulls him into a hug and he adds, “It’s good to see you.”

“It’s so lovely to see you too!” Mrs. Henderson says. She leads Steve through the house. “Please, come in! You can put Dusty-Bun’s gift on the dining room table. I have strawberry wine in the kitchen—ah, and orange juice, or lemonade. It’s yours if you want it!”

Mrs. Henderson pivoted to juice awfully fast. She must have found out about Steve’s Thanksgiving Break bender. Steve tamps down the feeling of shame worming its way through his mind and body, instead offering her another small smile before turning to the dining room to drop off Dustin’s gift.

Dustin and the rest of the Hellfire Club are in the den, playing a one-shot campaign that Eddie planned. When Dustin sees Steve, his face lights up.

“Steve! You made it!” he says, rushing over and giving him a bear hug.

“Hey buddy,” Steve says, hugging him back. “Happy birthday, Henderson.”

Dustin grins, and it lifts Steve’s mood immensely.

Mike, Lucas, Will, El, Max, and Erica greet him next, along with Eddie and his Corroded Coffin buddies. Eddie can barely look Steve in the eye, guilt from not being able to save you eating away at him. Steve’s told him multiple times not to feel bad about it—he knows Eddie and Dustin tried their best.

“Want to join the campaign?” Dustin asks Steve.

“Oh, I don’t know how to play,” Steve says. “I’ll just watch, okay bud?”

A short while later, Robin arrives. Once the campaign ends, Mrs. Henderson brings out the cake, and then gifts are opened.

“He looks really happy, huh?” Robin whispers to Steve, nudging him gently with her elbow.

Steve nods with a smile. Dustin took your death really hard—the two of you had been close ever since you helped him, Steve, Lucas, and Max fight the demodogs in the junkyard. Seeing Dustin smiling and laughing with his closest friends on his birthday makes Steve really, really happy.

Still, Steve’s heart aches. You should be here. You should be smiling as Dustin opens his gifts. You should be getting cake frosting on your nose, playing along with the campaign although you have no clue what’s going on.

Ice grips Steve’s chest. He gets a flashback of you lying on the cold ground, unmoving, and—

“You okay?” Robin whispers, brow furrowed. How the hell can she tell that he’s upset? It’s frightening how observant she is.

“Fine,” Steve says, throat tightening. He’s not. But he isn’t going to let his grief ruin Dustin’s big day.

At the end of the night, Dustin asks Steve when he’ll be back to visit again.

“My summer classes end in August,” Steve says. “I’ll come by then. Maybe we can hit the pool?”

Dustin seems disappointed that it’ll be a while before he sees Steve again, but he doesn’t push.

However, Steve ends up coming back to Hawkins much sooner. Three weeks after Dustin’s birthday party, Eleven calls Steve and tells him something that makes his heart stop:

“Steve, it’s about Y/N.” 

🍊🍊🍊

Steve is a frantic mess.

He sits in the Byers-Hopper basement, knee bouncing as he intently watches El try to find you in the Void again.

El had told him that she’d sometimes look for you in the Void, hoping to give him some semblance of closure. However, she claims that a few hours ago, she finally found you for the first time and saw you not as a corpse, but fully alive. It’s a hope that Steve didn’t dare hold onto before, not until now.

As soon as she called, Steve got in his car and drove to Hawkins, going ten over the speed limit the whole time. He picked up Robin and Nancy along the way to El, Will, and Jonathan’s, and (unfortunately) Mike tagged along.

“Do you see her?” Steve asks, voice cracking.

“No talking, please,” El says, tightening her blindfold.

Steve purses his lips. Will gives him an apologetic smile and Robin squeezes his arm to offer a semblance of comfort. Jonathan looks between Steve and El, an uneasy expression on his face.

“I see her,” El whispers after a few minutes.

Nancy gasps. Mike’s eyes widen. Steve staggers to his feet.

“She’s okay?” Steve asks. “Where is she?!”

“I can’t tell,” El says. “But she’s holding a small, white fuzzy animal. Wait, is it dead?”

“Lambchop,” Steve says.

“Come again?” Nancy asks.

“Lambchop is her favorite stuffed animal,” Steve explains. His heart pounds in his chest at the realization that holy shit, you really are alive. “She must be in the Upside Down version of her house.”

“Y/N!” El calls. “Y/N!”

After a few more minutes of calling to you, El pulls off the blindfold and wipes her nosebleed away.

“She can’t hear me,” El says with a sigh.

“Maybe because the gates are closed,” Nancy offers.

“But if you open another gate,” Steve says, “we can get back through and find her. Right?”

“Hold on a minute,” Jonathan says, holding a hand up like a traffic cop. “Is that such a good idea?”

Steve narrows his eyes.

“Is it such a good idea to save my girlfriend’s life? Yeah, I think so, Byers.”

“Steve,” Robin whispers. “It’s okay. Just relax.”

“Relax?” Steve says, voice rising in volume with every word. “Relax?! You want me to relax? What about this fucked-up situation is relaxing! My girlfriend has been stuck in literal hell for over a fucking year! We’re going to rescue her, no matter what!”

“But opening a new gate could have major repercussions!” Mike protests.

“Screw the repercussions,” Steve snaps, glowering. “We can’t just leave Y/N down there to rot!”

“None of us want to do that, Steve,” Nancy says, keeping her voice level and calm. “But what if this is a trick from Vecna?”

“It’s not,” Will says. “If it was, I would feel his presence. I don’t anymore.”

“Boom!” Robin says, snapping her fingers. “If our human monster detector doesn’t sense any bad vibes, then we should be good to proceed.”

“Maybe we should ask El what she wants to do before we make any plans to open new gates,” Jonathan points out.

“Exactly,” Mike says. “El, what do you want to do?”

El looks down at her lap, before looking up. She locks eyes with Steve.

“I’ll do it. I’ll open the gate.”

Relief floods Steve’s whole being. He feels lighter. More hopeful than he has in a long time. But it all comes crashing down when—

“That’s not happening.”

The group turns to see Hopper and Joyce on the basement steps. Joyce looks worried, face twisted into a frown. Hopper looks angry, with his brow furrowed.

“But Dad—” El says.

“No buts,” Hopper says. “You are forbidden to open a new gate. You hear me?”

Joyce places a hand on her husband’s shoulder and says, “Now, Hop…”

Steve interrupts, walking over to the older man with a wild, panicked look in his eyes. “Hopper, please. Y/N is still alive in the Upside Down. We just need one gate so I can go through and bring her back. Please.” Hopper fixes Steve with a sorrowful stare, the smallest bit of guilt etched on his features. Still, he remains steadfast.

“I’m sorry, kid,” Hopper says. “I’m not putting my daughter at risk. She won’t do it.”

El, Robin, and Will all try to convince Hopper otherwise, their arguments overlapping into a cacophony. Nancy, Mike, and Jonathan share uneasy looks.

Steve can’t listen to this anymore. He quietly excuses himself, darting past Hopper up the steps and stepping into the backyard.

He sinks on the porch stoop and stares off into the quiet, cool night. He understands Hopper’s reasoning, but he doesn’t have to like it. He’s spent over a year mourning you, only to discover he might be able to get you back—for that hope to be dashed as quickly as it blossomed.

Steve picks a point in the tree line and focuses on it, putting all his energy into watching it so he doesn’t break down or cause any more of a scene than he already has.

He hears the squeak of the back door and Robin’s tentative, “Hey, how you doing?”

Steve shrugs absentmindedly, continuing to stare. Robin lowers herself onto the stoop next to him.

For a few blissful minutes, she doesn’t speak. She just rests her head on his shoulder and lets him stew in silence.

The spell is broken when she blurts out, “You’re not going to break your sobriety, are you?”

“Jesus Christ, Robin,” Steve grumbles, nudging her slightly so she’ll sit up. “You don’t have to ask that every time I’m in a bad mood.”

“Sorry,” she says. She picks at her fingernails. “Sorry. I just worry about you, you know?”

“I know,” Steve says softly. “I worry about you too.”

“Me?” Robin says. “No, no. I’m fine.”

Steve eyes the way her hands fidget. Before he can say anything, she blurts out, “I just don’t want a repeat of Thanksgiving. I mean, you almost died of alcohol poisoning. They pumped your stomach!”

“I know. I was there.”

“No!” Robin snaps, sounding awfully harsh despite the tears welling in her eyes. It breaks Steve’s heart to see. “You were unconscious! And it was the scariest thing that’s ever happened to me, including all the torture and monsters, because I thought I was going to lose another best friend. I already lost Y/N. I can’t lose you too.”

She sniffles and Steve pulls her in for a hug. He can’t stop a few stray tears from falling down his own face as well.

“You won’t lose me,” Steve says, voice thick. “I promise, Robin. I’m not going to do that again. Okay?”

“Okay,” she mumbles, hugging him tighter. “I love you, dingus.”

“I love you, Rob.”

“That’s not fair,” Robin says, pulling away and wiping her tears on her sleeve. “You have to call me a mean nickname back or I just look like an asshole.”

Steve barks out a laugh and shakes his head.

“You are an asshole.”

“Perfect,” Robin says with a small smile. “Now we’re equally jerks. Just the way I like it.”

The back door opens and Will steps out.

“Hopper changed his mind!” he says with a grin.

Hope pumps like blood through Steve’s cold, shrunken heart. He’s going to see you again. Fuck, he’s going to see you again.

🍊🍊🍊

The next day, the group stands in the basement once more, this time making their plan for a rescue mission. Mike squealed to Eddie, Dustin, Lucas, and Max about what’s going on, and they all showed up wanting to help too.

“Not happening!” Hopper barks, a fierce look on his face. “New rule: you have to be 18 to come along.”

Eddie pumps his fist in victory, thrilled that he gets to come and try to make things right after losing you the first time. The younger teens grumble.

“But El is going!” Dustin complains.

“El is going to stay in the Lab with Joyce,” Hopper says. “She’ll open the gate for us and wait.”

“I can keep the gate open for one hour,” El says.

“That’s plenty of time to find Y/N!” Robin says brightly. “We already know she’s probably at her house.”

“And she lives close to Hawkins Lab,” Jonathan says, pointing to a map of Hawkins. “So we’ll be in and out.”

“It’ll be easy!” Eddie says.

“Don’t jinx it,” Hopper warns.

Nancy turns to Steve and pats his shoulder.

“You feeling good about this?” she asks quietly.

He nods. Although, truthfully, he’s terrified. If they come all this way, only for him to lose you again…he’s not sure he’d be able to handle that.

🍊🍊🍊

The Upside Down is not what Steve remembers.

The alternate dimension used to be dank and cold, like an endless winter’s night. Now with Vecna gone, it’s brighter, with a yellow sky and actual green foliage, not the moldy, dry shit from before. It seems less dangerous than last time.

No matter how much it’s changed, the thought that you’ve been here alone for over a year makes Steve’s blood run ice cold.

“This way!” Hopper barks, tracing his finger on his map of Hawkins and leading the group toward your house.

Jonathan and Nancy walk side-by-side with Hopper, glancing around at the tree lines constantly for any sign of danger. Eddie and Robin hang back, Steve walking slightly in front of them. He hears them whispering about something, but when he turns his head to try and listen, they quiet down.

He’s not an idiot. He knows what they’re worrying about: if they can’t find you, will Steve have another breakdown? Go on another bender? Would Steve even survive it?

Steve’s been wondering the same things himself. But for now, he stays positive, his optimism increasing tenfold when the six of them turn onto your street.

He can’t help but pick up speed, jogging past Hopper and causing the older man to snap, “Hey, stay behind me!”

Steve ignores his protests, shouting your name and pushing through the front door of your house.

He’s been here many, many times. He’s walked the pathway from your front door to your bedroom over and over again. Steve walks that path for the first time in over a year, charging up the steps and tuning out the concerned warnings from his friends.

He bursts into your bedroom, calling your name. He doesn’t see you, but maybe you hid when you heard the front door open. So he checks the closet, the ensuite bathroom, under the bed, to no avail.

Steve’s eyes sweep the space for any clues of your whereabouts. Most of the room seems untouched, except for your bed, where the sheets are rumpled and a grimy Lambchop the Stuffed Lamb sits primly on your pillow with her soft hooves crossed over her lap.

Steve picks up the toy, heart stuttering at the sight. You were sleeping here last night. You must have been. But where are you now?

“Steve!” Robin calls from down the hall, bringing him back to the present. “We found something!”

Steve gently places Lambchop back on the pillow—arranging her the way you always do, because anything else seems disrespectful—and heads back downstairs.

Hopper, Jonathan, Nancy, Eddie, and Robin are crowded around the kitchen table. On it is a sheet of paper with a rudimentary sketch of the town.

“Check it out,” Jonathan says. He traces his finger across the drawn lines. “It’s a record of where the gates originally opened.”

Sure enough, there are big stars drawn over Hawkins Lab, Eddie’s trailer, the road by the trailer park, Lover’s Lake, and the Creel House.

“That’s why she’s not here,” Nancy says. “She’s out searching for an opening.”

“We don’t have long,” Hopper barks, glancing at his watch with a grimace. “El can only keep the gate open for an hour. We have forty-one minutes to get back to the Lab.”

“We could split off into teams,” Nancy says. “Jonathan and I can go to Lover’s Lake.”

“Steve and I will hit the trailer park and the highway,” Robin adds. “Eddie and Hop, you can go to the Creel House.”

“We find Y/N,” Hopper says, “and we head back to the Lab. No wasting time. We move fast, we stay vigilant. Got it?”

The younger adults all nod and agree to stay on their walkies in case anyone needs to get in touch. Then, they split off to their destinations.

As Steve and Robin sprint toward the trailer park, Steve can’t stop panic from enveloping him head to toe. What if they’re too late? What if you’re dead—again? What if you don’t remember him somehow. What if—

“Look!” Robin says, throwing out an arm to stop Steve in his tracks. He skids to a stop and sees where she’s pointing.

Behind the closed curtains of the Munson trailer is the beam of a flashlight moving around. Steve’s heartbeat quickens.

“Okay,” she whispers as the duo slinks toward the trailer. “We need to think about this carefully, and make a plan to—wait, Steve!”

He charges into the trailer.

A figure flinches and whips around, hunting knife raised. Steve almost falls to his knees in shock at the sight. It’s really happening.

“Steve?” you whisper, voice cracking. He stands in front of you, hands raised and eyes flicking between your face and your knife. The corners of his eyes burn, tears starting to form.

He says your name, and the look on your face cracks his heart into seventeen pieces. He starts to step toward you, but—

“You’re not real,” you say quietly. “You can’t be.”

“No, I’m real!” Steve says. “It’s me, Y/N. It’s Steve. We’re here to take you home.”

You step back, still pointing your weapon at him.

“Don’t come any closer!” you shout.

“Okay, okay!” Steve says. He steps back, slowly.

“Steve!” Robin shouts from outside. “What’s going on in—”

“Stay outside, Robin!” Steve yells, voice wavering as he eyes your knife.

“But—”

Steve swiftly locks the trailer door without turning away from you.

The two of you ignore Robin’s knocks and protests. Eventually, she gives up, and Steve hears the crackle of her walkie-talkie.

“You can’t be Steve,” you say, shaking your head frantically.

“I am,” Steve begs. “And I’ve missed you so much—”

“You can’t be Steve because there’s no way into the Upside Down!” you say. He notices your arm start to shake. “Trust me, I’ve checked and checked and checked and there’s no gates anymore. And since my Steve isn’t a corpse at the Creel House, I know Vecna didn’t kill him and he’s back in the real world. If you’re not Steve, who the hell are you?”

Steve swallows hard. The back of his throat tastes acidic and he feels desperation wrench its way through every cell in his body. When he imagined his reunion with you, he didn’t anticipate this conversation.

“El reopened a gate for us,” Steve explains patiently. “We thought you were dead. But El looked for you and saw you were still alive, so we came to rescue you.” He glances at his watch and his brows furrow. “But we don’t have a lot of time. We need to head back to the Lab because she can’t keep it open forever.”

“How can I trust you?” you say. “How do I know you aren’t a trick?!”

“I’m really me, I promise,” Steve says. He hesitates before stepping closer to you once more. This time, you don’t move away. “We’re safe now, because Vecna’s dead.”

“I know. I killed him.”

Steve’s eyes widen a fraction.

“You what?”

“I had to,” you say. You shrug and look a little delirious. How much sleep have you gotten in the last year, Steve wonders. “Vecna brought me back. He would've flayed me and sent me to spy on and kill all of you if I didn’t kill him first.”

Steve almost falls over. The haunting fact that you had to fight Vecna alone makes his stomach turn.

The pained look on Steve’s face seems to shake something deep down in you. Any resolve you had crumbles. You heave out a sob, dropping the knife to the ground. Your knees buckle.

In seconds, Steve wraps you in his arms as you sink to the ground.

You cry, limp in his hold. Steve cries too, choking on encouraging words and apologies and everything he’s wanted to say to you since March 1986, when he thought he’d never speak to you again.

The door rattles. You startle and Steve holds you a little tighter.

“HARRINGTON!” Hopper barks. “Get a move on!”

“We have to go,” Steve says, urgent yet gentle. “We can talk more when we’re home. Okay?”

You nod, standing on unsteady legs.

Steve squeezes your hand before leading you out the door.

The whole rescue squad is out there, and you look wholly overwhelmed at seeing everyone after so long alone.

“No time for pleasantries,” Hopper says. “We’ve got less than twenty minutes to get through that gate.”

“Or it’s a slumber party at Y/N’s,” Eddie jokes. He playfully knocks his shoulder against yours and you gasp at the sudden contact. “Oh, sorry—”

“RUN!” Hopper yells, clapping his hands.

Everyone bolts toward the Lab. Steve and you run side-by-side, hands intertwined.

Shock envelops Steve’s senses, but he keeps running. The one thing racing through his mind is to get you back to safety.

The Lab’s gate is not the gaping maw it once was. It’s about the height of a minivan door, but its width is quite smaller—and slowly but surely shrinking.

El and Joyce stand on the gate’s other side, looking relieved to see everyone.

“Hurry!” Joyce says, waving you forward first. You hesitate, but Steve says, “We’re right behind you. Go on.”

You crawl through the gate and stumble to your feet on the right side of the universe. Steve would normally let everyone else go in front of him, but he wastes no time following behind you. Next comes Robin, then Jonathan and Nancy. Eddie and Hopper bring up the rear.

As soon as Hopper’s crawled through the gate, El drops her hand and it sews itself up—for the final time.

Steve and the others swarm you, all speaking too fast and asking a million questions. Joyce opens a first-aid kid and tries to sit you down and asses your various cuts and bruises. They hurt Steve to see.

“Look at her! She needs more than bandaids and alcohol wipes,” Eddie says, nodding in your direction.

“He’s right,” Jonathan says. “Mom, we need to take her to the hospital—”

“No!” you say. You stumble toward the staircase. “I need to go home. I need to see my parents, let them know I’m alive. How long have I been down there? I’ve been keeping track, and it has to be at least ten weeks, right?”

Steve places a hand on your shoulder. You look at him, eyes wild. “Y/N,” he says softly, “it’s been 15 months.”

That seems to be your final straw. Steve catches you as you pass out.

🍊🍊🍊

SIX HOURS LATER

While you get checked over by Dr. Owens and his people, Steve paces the hospital waiting room. Robin chews her thumbnail and watches the doors to the ER. Nancy and Jonathan bend their heads together and whisper, and Eddie attempts to distract Dustin and the other teenagers by juggling snacks from the vending machine.

After you fainted, Steve didn’t want to leave your side, but Hopper said everyone except himself and Joyce had to go home.

If our entire merry band shows up at Hawkins Mercy Hospital with a presumed-dead girl, it’ll look too damn suspicious, Hopper had said. Go home. Clean up. Wait three hours, and then you can come check on her. We’ll keep you updated.

In exactly 180 minutes, Steve and the others charge into the ER asking the nurse on duty about you.

“She’s still being looked over,” the nurse tells them. “Her parents and the Chief are with her now. You can wait over there and we’ll call you when she’s able to have visitors.”

Another 180 minutes go by. Now, everyone’s getting antsy. Steve has half a mind to charge into the ER and find you himself.

“Simmer down, Steve,” Robin says, noticing the way he’s squeezing the lilac teddy bear he bought you at the gift shop. “You’re choking the life out of that thing.”

“Why haven’t we heard anything from Hopper?” Steve asks. He checks his pager for the fiftieth time. “He said he’d keep us updated.”

“She’s probably going through a psych eval or something,” Max says.

“Or an interrogation,” Mike says darkly. “Maybe they think she had something to do with the murders last year.”

“Shut up, Mike!” Nancy hisses.

Steve curses and pinches his nose. Last year, a cruel man named Colonel Sullivan swept into Hawkins, searching for the real culprit behind Vecna’s kills after Eddie was proven innocent (thanks to a bogus alibi cooked up by Owens’ team). Steve was one of the unlucky few questioned, due to his connection as Jason’s former basketball captain. The thought of you, disoriented from so long in that shithole, handcuffed to a hospital bed while Sullivan grills you makes him see red.

Another sinking realization hits Steve: he’s changed since last year. What if you don’t like him anymore, once you realize how much of a mess he became when he lost you?

Hopper emerges through a set of double doors. Steve’s charging over to him in seconds, the rest of his friends piling behind and all talking at once.

Hopper holds up his hands to silence the group.

“Owens wants to run some more tests,” Hopper says. “They’re checking for contaminants in her bloodstream. You all can see her soon.”

He points at Steve. “Except she’s asking for you right now. You ready?”

Steve nods and squeezes your new teddy bear again. He gives Robin a panicked look, and she gives him a quick hug.

“Go get her,” Robin says with an encouraging smile.

Steve smiles back before following Hopper down the hall. Joyce stands outside your hospital room and smiles when she sees Hopper and Steve approach. Steve freezes.

Through the plane of glass in the door, he sees you with your parents. All three of you are crying.

“I don’t want to interrupt,” Steve says, backing away from the door. Before he can fully chicken out, Hopper bursts in and says, “Hey, look who came by.”

You and your parents look up. At the sight of him, your mother and father beam.

“Hello, Steve!” your mother says, sweeping him into a hug. “Can you believe she’s back?!”

“It’s a goddamn miracle,” your dad says, wiping tears on his sleeve. “We’ve been praying for this for so long.”

“Let’s leave these two alone to catch up,” Joyce says. “Grace, Roger, why don’t we pick up some food for Y/N?”

Your parents agree and step out with Joyce and Hopper. When it’s just you and Steve, all either of you can do is stare at each other with awkward smiles.

You clear your throat and point to the teddy bear.

“Is that little guy for me?”

“Yes!” Steve says. “Uh, sorry.”

He hands it to you. When your fingers brush, it feels electric. Still, after so long apart—no matter how much he’s dreamed of what it would be like if he somehow saw you again—everything feels stiff. You’re the love of his life and he can’t think of one thing to say.

“How have you been?” you ask quietly, seemingly just as uncomfortable as Steve.

Steve can’t help but laugh and says, “Terrible. I mean, shit. I know what you went through is way worse—”

“I don’t want to talk about what I went through,” you say sharply. Steve recoils and you wince. “I’m sorry, Steve. I just—I’ve been through this like five times with Owens’ guys, and over a cover story two more times with the cops. I don’t want to talk about me. I want to hear about you. What’s been going on?”

Steve wants to know more about what happened. About how you killed Vecna. About how you survived. But he doesn’t. He would never push you to discuss anything you didn’t want to, but he hopes that one day you’ll feel ready to open up to him.

Right now, you want to hear about his life. Where to begin. Steve thinks of sugar-coating the truth but doesn’t when he admits: “For starters, I almost died last year.”

You gasp and sit up a little straighter.

“What? Oh my god, what happened?”

“I’m fine now,” Steve says, waving away your concerns.

“Was it Vecna?”

“No, nothing like that. I really missed you, and I was in a bad place.”

You swallow hard, eyes turning glassy.

“Oh, Steve. Please don’t tell me you tried to—”

“No!” he says quickly. “It was alcohol poisoning. I drank too much being too lonely on Thanksgiving. Had to get my stomach pumped. It wasn’t all bad, though. Robin and I watched ‘A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving’ on the hospital room TV and Joyce snuck in some pie for me.”

You ignore his attempts and lightening the mood and wave him even closer to you. He cautiously approaches and intertwines your fingers when you reach for his hand.

“I’m so sorry,” you whisper. “I feel like it’s my fault—”

“Stop it.”

“Steve…”

“No!” Steve says. He shakes his head vehemently. “Don’t think like that. I just…struggled without you. But it’s not your fault that I’m a basket case.”

“You’re not a basket case,” you say. You squeeze his hand. “You’re the hero that crossed dimensions to come rescue me.”

You kiss his palm before scooching over on the hospital bed. You pat the spot next to you.

“What if your parents come back?” Steve asks.

“I’m not trying to hook up right now,” you say with an eye roll. “I just want you to lay with me.”

Steve is happy to oblige. He settles next to you. You rest your head on his shoulder and hug the teddy bear he brought you.

“So, you didn’t move on?” you ask quietly after a few minutes of peaceful silence. “Find a new girlfriend?”

“What?!” Steve asks, looking down at you, jaw dropped. “You really think I found someone else?”

You nod, fidgeting with the bow around your bear’s neck.

“15 months is a long time,” you whisper. “I don’t want to stand in the way if you're with someone else.”

“I couldn’t,” Steve says. He rests a hand on your knee cautiously. When you don’t flinch or move away, he keeps it there. “Y/N, I don’t want anyone else. I only want you, if you’ll still have me.”

You look up at him, noses practically brushing. The close proximity makes Steve’s cheeks flush rosy pink.

“You mean that?” you ask.

Steve nods. It seems to placate you, because in seconds, you’re lifting your chin to kiss him.

It’s a soft, gentle thing. An innocent brush of lips, like the kisses you shared very early in your relationship. Not the passionate “welcome home” kiss that Steve wants to give you, but he understands if you need to take things slow. He’ll move as slow as you need.

For the first time in months, Steve feels hopeful about his future again. Steve’s world is changing once more, in all the right ways.

🍊🍊🍊

EPILOGUE

You and Steve have your futures mapped out: after six months of physical and emotional healing, move in with Steve and join him at U of I in spring of ’88. Get engaged and subsequently married sometime within five years. No kids—at least, not biological ones, because your time in the Upside Down has caused lasting physiological effects that you don’t want to pass on to children. Maybe you’ll adopt a kid, or some dogs.

It's less of a map and more of an amorphous outline of what you two want to happen. All you two know for sure is that you never want to be apart that long ever again.

Steve’s heart and soul have changed, but they belong to you, and yours to him. Always.

🍊🍊🍊

a/n please lmk what you thought 🧡

tag list; @hollandweather @starry-eyed-steve @aloneinthehellfire @tvandfanfic @a-dealwith-god @stevebabey @keerysquinn @spoookysix @inkluvs

[sheisjoeschateau]

"Oh, so we DO love Steve..." | PART III

⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆ SERIES MASTERLIST ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆

Steve Harrington x Bauman!fem!reader enemies to lovers, heavy angst, hurt/comfort, upside down mayhem, S2-S4, post S4 universe hot-take, end-of-the-world / dystopian setting, ugly fights turned smut (...but with hella plot). 18+

CHAPTER WARNINGS: mega plot-driven smut ahead in this part of the story. you've been warned. MINORS, DNI. 18+

***

Despite everything, you and Steve both get through battling Vecna. You both grin and bear it. You both set aside your differences when the moment calls for it.

Just like you have before. Many times.

And in the midst of it all, you can't help but wonder about your uncle. How he's doing. If he's somewhere in his bunker still, hopefully drinking less (ideally, not at all) and keeping up his phone calls with Joyce. You'd told her to keep tabs on him, and you also told your uncle to keep tabs on her. They needed each other. You had the kids and the teens, but they needed each other. And sure, your uncle has you. Always. But you have to work, and babysit, and hang around a guy who hates your guts because the circumstances won't permit otherwise.

Eddie and Robin really stick up for you. They do. They really like you. Steve can’t stand it.

Even Nancy doesn’t mind you. Honestly, she’s scared of you more than anything. Steve doesn’t care.

The kids love you. Steve won’t make them hate you. He never would. But he won’t endorse their kind sentiments about you either.

More groups are formed, along with more plans. Scary, life-threatening plans.

You stay behind with Dustin and Eddie, knowing that Steve is quietly a basket case over the concept leaving Dustin alone without having him there to protect him from all this shit, the way he has before. With the demodogs, the Russians, and everything up to this point. That kid is his brother. His son.

It’s the only time that Steve tells you thank you.

And he sincerely means it.

By the grace of some unspeakable force, you manage to not only keep Dustin alive...but also Eddie. The bats have done their damage, and you've got some damage yourself. Though not nearly as bad as Eddie. You can withstand yours with adrenaline and the sheer need to protect one of your kids and get this metalhead back to the real world so that he can get proper medical attention.

When Steve and the girls all get back to the three of you there, after all the shit hits the fan - you, Steve, Nancy, Robin and Dustin all manage to get Eddie back across the gate and get him majorly patched up. Thanks to Dr. Owens.

You keep Eddie hidden at Murray's bunker. You're shocked to find it empty, your worry growing more every single minute. But Steve tries to assure you that your uncle is likely fine, probably just out to eat or something. However... even he knows that is not true. Murray does not go anywhere.

"Bauman," he's saying to you, softly. So softly. Softer than he's ever spoken to you once. "He's gonna be okay. I promise. We're here, alright?"

Two days later, Jonathan and his Cali crew all show up. Nancy and him are reunited.

And you watch Steve break.

He doesn’t let it show, not really. But you see it. Both you and Robin do. You let her comfort him. He needs his best friend, much more than he needs you. Especially in this situation. You are undoubtedly the last source of comfort for him in this specific instance.

You reunite with your Uncle Murray, who has returned with Joyce and — to your surprise — a very much alive Hopper.  It’s a beautiful reunion, as you all hug tightly. 

You all fucking lived, bitch.

Given the new flurry of debris-snow-shit in the air, you all end up having to take shelter.

Steve volunteers his house, given that his parents fled to their vacation home and he told them he wasn’t going. They ditch him, so he has the house all to himself. This time, he doesn’t have to be alone though.  He has his real family.

You all move into the Harrington House. Lord knows it’s big enough. But it’s also really tight, for two people who can’t stand each other unless there’s a really ugly monster guy waltzing around that needs to be killed along with his multi-species army of little uglies.

Given the close quarters, on top of the fact that you all can’t leave the house much unless it’s for supplies, you and Steve have no choice but to coexist.

He still resents you, especially seeing Nancy and Jonathan are now getting along again and seem to be doing better. But it's much more subdued now, and you both find a way to talk. Which happens mainly because of you, initiating.

You learn more about Steve's home life, given the pictures everywhere throughout the house. They're all pretty stiff, lacking warmth. You figured that Steve was a pretty lonely trust fund baby, and being that you're a lonely child you can relate to the loneliness that comes with that. Not the trust fund part. Just the only-child-syndrome part, which you know perfectly well forces you to either become very well acquainted with yourself...or hate yourself even more. Steve clearing did not lean into becoming his own source of reliability and companionship, the way that you did. And it made you understand him better. It made you understand why he needed to be around the likes of Carol and Tommy H. He did not know how to be alone with himself.

"I think my dad and I don't even like the same beer," Steve scoffs, allowing himself a humorless chuckle. You don't laugh with him, instead giving him a soft look. An apology with your eyes.

"And my mom, she just...I dunno. Sometimes, I wonder why she never left him."

You let Steve reveal as little or as much as he wants to. It just depends on the day.

The two of you watch out for the kids. You both go with them to visit Max in the hospital. You even initiate finding a way to get her to stay there while in a coma, thanks to enlisting the help of your uncle to help enlist the help of Dr. Owens. The kids love you for that.

Steve doesn’t love you… But he appreciates you.

A lot. He's beginning to find appreciation for you, for a lot of things.

Your uncle clocks the very niche tension between the two of you, now that you’re all under the same roof and he’s given no choice but to.

And damn, it makes him curious. He is, after all, the witch doctor of love…

Nevertheless, Murray takes his time choosing when to strike.

As you and Steve both help nurse Eddie back to health, and read to Max in her coma (which leads to both of you just simply talking), and make the kids laugh together, and even make conversation with Nancy and Jonathan (…it’s very double date ish) Murray watches his niece — and mannnnnn, is he amuuuuuused.

One night, you and Steve stay up to share some drinks with the adults. It’s the first time that the two of you actually make each other really laugh, heartily. The drinks help.

That’s sort of Murray’s plan. Vodka is, after all, the holy grail.

Even Eddie joins, along with Robin. But Steve sits next to you. Not his best friend, or the new friend he’s made in the metalhead. Nope, he sits his perfect, hunky ass that makes all the ladies drool right next to little ole you.

And damn, do you both laugh.

Murray’s never seen you laugh that hard with anyone in his life. He wonders if you’ve ever laughed that way at all. 

And the way that Harrington looks at you?  Especially when you’re not looking… Holy shit. 

And the way you look at him the same way... makes Murray grin ear to ear like a mischievous kid with the plan to wreak havoc.

Hopper and Joyce are so settled into their relationship, and Jonathan seems to be winning back the love of Nancy. Eddie and Robin are so single it hurts, but it's legendary too. And you? Steve? Well, you guys are mortal enemies. And yet somehow, sitting here in the Harrington's living room with glasses of chilled vodka, belly-laughing over anything -- you and Steve exude more chemistry than all of them combined.

So when everyone goes to bed, and Murray catches you alone, he grills you. Not like the others. Nah, you’re family. He’ll cut you some slack.

…not much, though.

It sobers you right up.

"Do not tell me for one second that you don't think he's gorgeous," your uncle is saying in a low voice. You're both standing in his bedroom, having fetched him a tall glass of water which turned out just be a way to fucking lure you into his witchdoctor trap.

"I love you Uncle Murray. I really do. But this theory? -- is not one of your other bullseye's."

"Face it, kiddo," your uncle is smirking. "Your uncle's never wrong. You're just never the one on the other end of his lectures when he's making astute observations. You're always contributing to it. But this time? You're the leading lady, darling."

"False."

"You like Steve."

"Murray...!"

"You like Steve..."

You try to tell your uncle that everything he is saying is nonsense. Steve hates you. He absolutely hates you. Loathes and despises you, and plans to do so until you’re all particles of dust. 

“Plus, he is so fucking annoying and whiny and entitled and has zero self respect unless it’s up against someone who calls him out for his shit,” you tell your uncle, gesturing to yourself on the last part. “Steve Harrington is a cocky guy who would just rather suffer in his own misery than ever see or lean into being this...this incredible man that he's...capable of being, the role model he has become to those kids, who love him, they love the human most deserving of being put first —”

.................

…oh fuck.

The silence is deafening. Murray’s smirk and all-knowing glare only adds to your being aware of what you just said to him, and admitted to yourself, out loud.

“Oh…oh so we do love Steve.”

Your uncle’s words are the cherry on top of the cake you just baked, and didn’t know you had the ingredients to make.

You don’t sleep that night.

***

The next morning, you and Steve both sit with Max.

"Wondering what she wrote in yours?"

Steve is nodding at the stack of letters on the bedside table. You all left them there, promising yourselves not to open them. Because she will wake up.

Lucas took it hard, Max dying. You'd been there to hold him, comfort him, along with Steve. You both watched him burst into tears numerous times, sometimes sobbing uncontrollably, despite the fact that she was somehow still here. It broke both your hearts, but you both got through it with him. Together.

And while the other kids were taking it hard too...so fucking hard...it was Steve who carried the most guilt. Remorse, anguish and guilt.

"I failed my kid," Steve had told you at the hospital once. You looked at him with a furrowed brow and concerned eyes.

"Steve, no you didn't."

His voice shook, eyes drowning in nightmarish thoughts. "I wasn't there for her. I wasn't -- wasn't..."

"You could never fail those kids. Not even if you tried."

He didn't believe you. But he wanted to. You had squeezed his hand that day, sitting in the waiting room. And to your surprise, not only did he let you...but he squeezed it back, letting your hands rest that way for an hour as you fell asleep in the seats before being woken up.

And now, sitting in one of his guest rooms while Max lay asleep in the coma still, you can see that guilt in him is spreading.

Steve is holding the letter that she gave to him, and you ask him if he’s wanting to read it.

Steve snorts. "God, you kidding? She'll wake up just to kill me before going right back to sleep."

You smirk, biting back a real laugh. “True.”

But Steve looks conflicted. He fiddles with the letter in his hands, wanting to tear it open. You know that he does.

“…want me to read it out loud to you instead? She can kill me in your place.”

Steve chuckles at that.

...but he doesn’t say no.

In fact, after biting his lip for a minute and thinking, he finds himself nodding. Yes. Please, read it to me, he’s thinking.

So you do.

You take the letter and read it to him. You read him the words that only a little sister could write to a big brother who she loves and wishes she will grow up to be like. You read him words that make him light up like a Christmas tree, yet cause him a painful ache deep within his bones. You read him a letter of love that no one ever took the time to write, let alone express, to him his entire life.

Steve fights tears. He bites them back, successfully. You’re the last person he ever wants to see him vulnerable. Hell, he can’t even see himself like that without judging his own self harshly. He can only imagine that you will, too.

He doesn’t know, though, that not only would you never judge him for that. But selfishly, you wish he would feel safe with you. Or God, someone at least. Just not Nancy.  Someone who deserves him wholeheartedly.

"Steve," you speak softly.

He's staring into space, zoned out. But then, he finally looks over at you. He sees the kindness in him, and it almost takes his breath away. The way that you look at him...he just never thought you could...that you could --

"You're all of these things. Everything she wrote in this? You're all of it. And then some. You're the hero all those kids dream of being when they grow up. You're their favorite person. The one they trust, go to for everything. Even if you don't think that they do, they do."

He listens, unable to move. Speak. Breathe.

"You are...a great person, Steve Harrington."

***

That night, there’s a knock on your door. You’ve been given the guest room upstairs with no bunk mate. Unlike most of the people in the house. But given that Joyce and Hopper are together now, and El sleeps in Max’s room to keep watch, the four younger boys share a room with Eddie, Nancy is with Jonathan, Erica sleeps at her own house and Robin shares Steve’s room since she splits her time here and at home — you and Murray got the solo rooms.

Steve is now grateful for those sleeping arrangements tonight.

Because when you open the door, he’s on the other side. He looks sad, conflicted and lost. Like his mind is racing at a million miles an hour, yet can’t think of anything to say. He’s tongue tied, just staring at you expectantly…

What is he expecting?

“What’s wrong?” you ask. “Is it Max?”

Something about your question makes Steve brows pinch together. Like it’s suddenly confusing him even more. But he doesn’t speak.

You wait patiently. But truth be told, you are anxious as fuck. Because damn, he’s pretty. He is so stupid pretty. And fuck it’s annoying. His lips are just the right shape in a pout, and it’s really fucking annoy —

His lips are crashing into yours before you can even finish dissecting them.

Steve is kissing you like life depends on it. Gentle at first, but eager. Determined.

And when you both pulls back -- you don’t hesitate for more than a solid 2-3 seconds, your eyes shocked while his eyes silently ask, is this okay?

Your lips crashing back against his answers — yes.

Steve is a hurricane of both madness and all things serene in the ways that he touches your body. He explores your skin with his lips and hands, as if he has all the time in the world. The curve of your jaw and neck. The jut of your collarbones. The feel of your clavicle, which leads him to the shape of your tits and nipples. He cherishes your body, hungrily exploring it. It’s heated, hot and heavy. He licks a stripe down your abdomen to the waistband of your sweatpants. The way his brown irises look up at you, all round and doe eyed, makes the back of your throat groan with need. It’s not loud or brash, nor is it strained and quiet. It’s soft but certain. Steve melts at it, his fingers curling one by one around the band of your sweatpants, his eyes still asking — please?

You’re nodding without even having to hear a word out of him. And Steve pulls.

Euphoria is the feeling of Steve’s tongue exploring your folds. It’s the sound of him sighing into your portal in pure pleasure, and the way he sucks your clit with fervency yet flicks it with supple patience. His hands knead into your thighs, one of them reaching to squeeze your hips so that he can pull himself up to you and let you taste yourself on his tongue. He wraps an arm underneath your waist, hooking you to him, asking in the breathiest of whimpers, “Please let me, angel.”

He’s getting a fistful of your hair into one of his big hands, adoring the way that you squeak a yelp. You suck on his tongue, hard, and it’s enough to drive him mad. He pins himself against you, grinding. But you sit up, keeping your bodies glued together and now using your teeth to tug on his lip and paralyze him in pure ecstasy. You take the opportunity to slide your teeth and tongue down his jaw and neck, trailing pecks and kisses along the way, and the throaty whimper he lets out makes you see stars behind your hooded eyes as you drag your tongue down his chest. The wet stripe you’re leaving glides down to his toned abdomen’s bunny trail, and as you curl your fingers around his sweatpants, you pause… letting your lips press the most fluttery of kisses to each of his scars.

Steve can’t help the shudders, sighs and whimpers that escape his lips, along with your name. It’s raw, uncensored.  He clutches your hand, which you extend up to him in a greedy grab as you slowly work his pants down with your other hand. You hook your fingers onto his chin, forcing him to let go of your hand in his and look down at you. He does, and it’s game over. You watch him and never break eye contact as you use both hands to push down his briefs…

…and thank God for that — because otherwise, you would see just what you’re up against as far as pleasuring him goes.

You feel the tip of his hard length tap your chin, and you scoot farther down into the mattress — on your knees like a perfect angel. Your tongue plays with its head, tasting the tang of his pre-cum, and Steve is shaking so hard he can’t stand it. He clenches his jaw, gritting out blissful curses through his teeth. “Fuck, baby, fuck.”

You take in the intense length of him, pleasuring him until he is touching the back of your throat and nearly gagging you senseless, and the mess he is up above you — it sends your mind into a tailspin. He has never looked so pretty, eyes squeezed shut except when he’s glancing back down at you with more fondness and adoration than you ever thought possible from not only a man who hates you…but any man at all.

And when Steve is just about to cum, he begins to beg. “P-please. Wait, please.”

His hands urgently cup your jaw, forcing you to look back up at him and cease your sickeningly perfect work. He pulls, and you follow. He drinks you in with his gaze, staring into your soul, as if he’s trying to figure you out. He stares and stares, his thumbs stroking your cheeks, his brown eyes searching yours like you are the most beautiful mystery he has ever needed to solve. He looks as though he might ask you something. Say something...

But he dives in to kiss you again before he lets himself.

His hand wraps around the bend of one of your knees, tugging it up so that he can hook your leg around his waist. Then he does it to the other. And before you know it, you’re straddling him.

“Fuck, Bauman, please,” Steve Harrington groans into your mouth. Then softer, murmuring against your lips as he kisses them endlessly, “please let me, please.”

And you know what he is asking. You know what he wants. You don’t have to even think twice. Lifting yourself up, lining him with your entrance, he stretches you out and the euphoric sting of it sucks the air right out of you. And Steve.

Steve is winded by the feeling of how tight your walls are, and by just how right it feels to be inside of you. You both fit. Like a perfect match.

At this point, you’re both a frenzy of fucking. You ride him – slow, hard, fast, all of it. Steve keens into your mouth, then your neck as he buries his face there — completely overwhelmed. You hold his head there, comfortingly and securely, and so fucking perfectly as your fingers tug at the ends of his perfect hair.

“I’ve got you, baby,” your voice shakes in a breathy whisper, just for him. “Let it all go.”

And Steve does. His fingers dig into the curve of your back, pulling you impossibly closer to him as he presses the loud growl of his climax into your bare shoulder. He releases himself into you, hot and loaded, and you drip just as much onto him as he just shot into you.

As if that wasn’t enough to send you reeling — enough to make you see angels and devils and god — it’s the way that Steve shudders against you, catching his breath…and then pulls back to look at you…that renders you speechless.

His hairline leaks sweat, his face beaded with it. His eyelids are hooded, the dark brown irises dazed and daring to meet your gaze. His lips are parted perfectly — and the way he looks up at you with his tousled hair, somehow still perfect after it’s been pulled and messed with, is the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen. Steve Harrington is so fucking beautiful.  He’s an all-American boy, yet a Greek god.

The way that Steve gently brings your forehead to his, breathing against you, closing his eyes at the contact — you find yourself timidly nuzzling the tip of your nose to his. And you feel him smile against you, opening your eyes just enough to steal a peek — and that’s when you feel a deep ache in your heart and soul that might as well kill you.

Because now you realize. That is love. 

Steve is love.

But you let it die inside of you tonight, not wanting to make this moment end any sooner than it has to. Instead, you let Steve entangle his limbs with yours, not daring to ask if he wants to stay. Because if you do, he’ll likely leave. He’ll realize that being in bed with you is the last place that he wants to be, and that he’s made a mistake. He’ll go back to hating you, more than he already does, and it will be the death of you. So instead, you just let it ride out however it’s supposed to.

You try not to count the minutes as Steve absentmindedly traces circles with his fingertips on your skin. Your hip bones, your shoulder blades, your spine. You tell yourself to forget that time and its limits exist as you stroke the hair at the nape of Steve’s neck, your temple against his forearm, his outer arm draped over you. You tell yourself that this is it. This is heaven. This is eternity. You tell yourself even if you wake up and it’s just a dream, you’ll remember it for as long as you live. Because on the other side of death is this, and it will never end.

You let that ease your mind as he presses his lips to your forehead and you no longer fight sleep.

So when you do wake up…and find that Steve is still there…you’re shocked. But you stay that way until he wakes. He looks at you in awestruck wonder. Not confusion or regret. Just…wonder.

He props himself up on an elbow, still looking at you, deep in thought. All you can do is stare back, wishing you knew what the hell he was thinking but not daring to ask. It wasn’t worth risking this.  You stay that way for a little while.

He finally breathes a sigh, whispering, “Kids will be up soon.”

You give him a soft smile and gentle nod. You can already see Dustin waking up to go knock down Steve’s door, and that’s…not gonna end well if he finds out that Steve is walking out of your room instead.

Steve contemplates god-knows-what for another long moment before pressing a quick kiss into your hairline as he rises.

You watch him stand and dress himself, your heart throbbing at the way he looks in the early morning light streaming through the windows. His body is god-like. Tall, lean and athletic. His skin has the most beautiful constellation of moles that put the entire galaxy of stars to shame. And you ache at the thought of never being able to touch them again.

He gives you a soft grin after he throws his t-shirt back on, and before you know it he’s gone.

You lay there staring at nothing, feeling yourself leak a couple of silent tears and wondering why. You find yourself afraid to get up and face whatever new reality lies ahead of you on the other side of that door. 

***

thanks for reading :) comment to be added to my tag list for this series.

tags: @erastourvip @xprloki @get0ut0fmyr00m @eddiemuns0nl0ver @marrowfrog00

[runninriot]

Even Heroes Fail Sometimes

written for @steddieangstyaugust day 17

prompt: "keep breathing, please" | wc: 4.657 | rated: M | cw: blood and injuries | tags: canon divergence, vecna is defeated, hurt/comfort, confessions, angst with happy ending | complete fic on ao3

Thirty-five, thirty-six, thirty-seven,-

Thirty-eight seconds since Eddie last opened his eyes.

Steve doesn’t know why he’s counting. Maybe he just needs something to do, something to distract himself from the horrors with. From the frightening noises of the Upside Down slowly falling apart and the smell. He’s got blood sticking to every part of his body, some is his, some is not. Most of it is Eddie’s, gushing out of too many wounds.

    Fifty-seven, fifty-eight, fifty-nine,-

Steve keeps counting.

Maybe the doctors will need to know how long he’s been unconscious when they get him to the hospital.

Because they will get him there, no matter what Eddie said.

    ‘Jus’ leave me ‘ere. You- you’re better off without me.’

They would never leave him behind, they couldn’t. Steve couldn’t. Because Dustin needs Eddie. Needs to know that at least they tried.

No matter how hopeless it seems.

No matter how slim the chances are that he’ll make it.

They have to try.

    Sixty-three, sixty-four, sixty-

   “S’eve?”

He’s never been happier to hear his name, to hear Eddie’s voice, despite how broken he sounds.

   “I’m here, Eddie. I got you. Just- hang in there. We’re almost there.”

Technically, it isn’t even a lie; the gate is already in sight, gleaming and moving, frayed edges blazing like flames.

They’re so close, just a few more steps. Eddie doesn’t need to know that the hardest part is yet to come.

   “’m not gonna make it, Stevie.” Eddie’s voice is so weak, so small compared to what he usually sounds like.

This is wrong. This is not how it’s supposed to be.

   “Bullshit!” Steve protests, forcing his legs to keep going, forcing his arms not to loosen their grip around Eddie’s mangled body.

This is not the time to give up, not when they’re almost out the gate. They just have to make it to the other side where Nance is waiting with the caravan to get them to safety.

   “Even heroes fail sometimes,” Eddie whispers and Steve can hear that he’s smiling.

Why is he smiling?

   “We’re not gonna fail! We’re gonna make it and you will be fine! We’ll get you to the hospital and they’ll-“

   “Thank you, S’evie. F- for tryin’”

Eddie’s body goes limp in his arms.

    Three, four, five-

He’s unconscious again, that’s all.

He’s not dead. Eddie is not dead. Steve can feel that he’s still breathing. That’s not just his imagination, right?

   “Come on, Eddie! Keep breathing, please!”

Steve tries not to panic but it’s hard not to. With Eddie hanging motionless over his shoulder, he can’t see his face, and there’s no time to stop and take a look at his wounds. They’ve got to keep moving.

Steve feels like his heart is trying to break through his ribcage and his lungs feel like they’re about to collapse. Everything hurts. His own wounds sting and itch, and his muscles tremble from overstrain.

    Please, Eddie. Please don’t die.

---

Steve doesn’t remember how they made it through in time before the gate closed behind them. But they did, all of them.

Poor Robin seems to be in shock. She’s in the front seat next to Nancy, hasn’t said a word since they got out.

Nancy is trying her best to concentrate on the road, doing everything to keep a straight face while Dustin is crying and screaming at her to ‘Drive faster!’

The boy is completely out of his mind, probably in pain – his leg really didn’t look good – and he must be so scared, so worried about his bleeding friend in the back.

Steve hovers over Eddie’s lifeless body, helplessly pressing pieces of cloth against the worst of his wounds. There’s blood everywhere and he still hasn’t opened his eyes again.

   “Come on, Eddie. You can do it. I know you can.”

Steve has lost count, has lost every feeling for time and space, can only focus on the shallow up and down movement of Eddie’s chest.

He’s weak but he is still breathing, still holding on.

That’s good, right? Means he’s still got some fight left in him. That maybe, despite all the fucked-up shit going on, he’s still got something worth living for.

   “You can’t die, Eddie. Dustin needs you.”

    I need you.

   “Alright, Steve, get ready! We’re here!”

The caravan comes to an abrupt halt with the tires screeching as Nancy steps hard on the breaks.

And then, chaos unfolds.

   “Help! We need help!”

It’s good to hear Robin’s voice even if it pains him how broken she sounds, how he can hear the tremble in each word – he knows she’s only barely holding on, knows her good enough to know she’s near tears, on the verge of letting it all out.

But she’s a fighter, Robin is.

His best friend in the world is so brave and so, so strong when it counts. You’d think her clumsy, rambly nature is an act when you see her on the battle field.

She shouldn’t have to be strong. None of them should. They’re fucking kids, for fuck’s sake! All of them. Dustin and his little friends, obviously. But also him, Robin, Nance, Jonathan, Eddie – they’re hardly what you can call young adults and yet, they’re forced to fight like fucking soldiers in a war against powers none of them can even understand.

But it’s what they do.

What most of them have been doing for years now.

They’ve lost so much already and every time evil comes back to haunt them, the losses become greater, harder to deal with.

They’ve lost people they knew, people they loved – not again.

Not this time.

They will not lose Eddie.

---

continue reading here

[rogueddie]

In the end, it seems inevitable. Something that is too obvious, too predictable, yet so perfectly him. Because if there was ever a way that Steve would want to go, if there was anything last thing that Steve would want to be remembered for, it would be this. It would be an act of good, an act of love. Something that shows his care, shows how important this rag-tag team is. How dear he holds them to his heart.

Robin had stumbled. It was just a slight fumble, an easy mistake. It left her open to attack, for a split second. Not even half a moment, she had been open and vulnerable.

Vecna had seen. He had been looking for an opening to strike, desperate to retaliate, but unable with the continued onslaught. They worked so well as a team, synchronized in their attacks on all fronts. From El in his mind, the kids attacking his monsters, the adults attacking the body. It was a fight he was doomed to loose, no matter what he tried- he was already so weak from their last attack, then the attempts to attack first and drain his own energy.

But Robin stumbled.

Steve was always aware of her, at all times. They had become dangerously dependent after the gates first connected. They weren’t attached at the hip anymore, they were fully conjoined. There was nothing she could do, no where she could go, without Steve knowing. Her awareness of him was just as intense.

So when Robin stumbled, Steve noticed. When Vecna zeroed in on her, Steve noticed. He didn’t hesitate.

It was only three steps. He was there, shielding her, before his gun even hit the ground.

“Steve!” Robin screamed behind him.

He was tempted to sarcastically scold her for nearly blowing out his ears. But there was ice in his chest. He couldn’t feel his legs and it sent him stumbling back into her. She tried to catch him under his arms but his weight sent them both tumbling to the floor.

Thankfully, her screams didn’t distract the others. They kept up the attack, not pausing for a second. No one even risked a glance, everyone too aware of how much they need to win this. Steve can wait.

Not according to Robin, though. Her entire body shakes behind him, fingers clawing at him in an attempt to hold him closer, pressing on the would as much as she can. She screams for help, begs and sobs, only becoming more hysterical when Steve tries to reassure her.

“It’s ok, Robs,” he tries. He tries to lift an arm, tries to pat hers. But he’s so numb. It’s something he’s glad for, it’s much better than the pain. He can’t feel his arms enough to truly lift them.

It only panics Robin. She tucks her face into his neck, leaving him wet with her tears as she rocks them. She’s still screaming, though it’s more hysterical sobs than words now.

He isn’t sure how long they stay like that before silence finally rings out.

He does his best to turn his head, relieved to see everyone else still standing. Vecna looks… disgusting. More like cheese left to rot in the sun than a man or a monster. Steves face scrunches up in disgust at the thought that he looks squishy.

“Oh, god, Steve!” Nancy gasps.

Heads finally turn to them. Steve offers them a weak smile.

Joyce is the one who goes to him first. Her hands join Robins, trying to stop the blood, trying to hold him together. She’s trying to offer him words of comfort and reassurance, even though she’s crying. Even though he can see how little hope she has. Her hands are shaking as much as Robins.

“Joyce,” Hopper says, voice gruff. He tries to say something else, but even he is choked up.

“I know,” is her reply. Her voice cracks. She only glances at him, but they understand each other. They know exactly what the other is trying to say without needing to say it.

It’s a lovely thing to see, Steve ponders. A little bit like his relationship with Robin. A connection so deep and ingrained that they can crawl inside the others head. And yet they still love each other, with such obvious devotion. Steve feels lucky that he gets to see another example of it.

“Just hang in there,” Jonathan says. He crouches down, puts a hand the shoulder that Robin is occupying. “We’re- we’re gonna get help. You’re gonna be ok.”

“Nah,” Steve is surprised at how even he sounds, so light, almost sounding content. “I’m gonna stay here. It’s comfortable. But we won right? He’s dead. We should- we should be celebrating.”

There’s some commotion, heads turning towards the door. Hopper and Nancy run out of his line of sight. There’s a lot of raised voices. It’s very confusing, Steve struggling to really hear what they’re saying. His head feels fuzzy. But… he immediately recognizes one of the voices.

“Dustin?” He asks, blinking around confused.

The commotion gets worse for a moment, Hopper yelling. He sounds desperate.

Dustin steps into view though, standing and just looking at him for a moment. He falls to his knees hard enough that even Steve winces at the thud, his hands reaching out to grasp at Steves top. “No, no, no! You promised, you can’t-!”

“You need to be more careful with your knees, dude,” Steve scolds, doing his best to glare. “You’re gonna do some real permanent damage at this rate.”

“Shut up,” Dustin sobs, exasperation bleeding through. “God, you’re such a mom.”

Steve starts laughing, but the motion makes pain shoot through him. He has to squeeze his eyes shut, groaning, impatiently waiting for the numbness to return.

“No, no, please, just- just hang on,” Dustin pleads. “Hang on, we’re gonna get you help and you’ll be fine. You’re gonna be fine, ok? Come on, Steve-”

He’s gently pushed aside by Max, guided by Lucas. She keeps a hand on his arm, white eyes somehow knowing exactly where he is with the now familiarly terrifying accuracy. “Hey, Steve.”

“Hey, red.” He’d picked up the nickname from Eddie. It somehow stuck with him. It always brought a smile to her face.

“You know how much we all love you, right?” Her hands tighten for a moment. She has to pause, taking a deep breath. “Because we do. I know it started as a joke but you really are like our mom. Just as overbearing and annoying.” She pauses, Lucas whispering that Steve is grinning, biting back laughter. “But we know you do that shit because you care about us. It’s… what I said in that letter. I wanted you to know that… even though we joke about it… we do love you.”

“Thanks, Max.”

“That goes for us too,” Nancy tacks on, gesturing to herself and Jonathan. “We haven’t had it… easy, but-”

“We do love you,” Jonathan finishes. He grabs her hand, offering her as much support as he can. He ducks his head, awkward, when he notices that the action makes Steve smile. “You’re a good guy. I’m just… sorry it took me longer to realize.”

Flashing blue and red blares through the wood panels covering the window.

“Hold on,” Dustin reminds Steve as he hurries to his feet. “I’ll get them, I’ll bring them in.”

He hurries out, Jonathan quickly going with him. Despite the certainty that others are still there, hovering just out of sight, it feels like he’s left with Joyce, Robin, Nancy, Max and Lucas. He kind of wishes Dustin was there, but it’s good for him to feel useful. He’ll need to know, later, that he really did do all that he could. He’ll need to know that there really wasn’t anything else he could do. No what ifs, not like he had with Eddie.

“Robin?” Steve asks.

“Y-yeah, Stevie?”

“Talk to her, yeah? For me?”

She laughs. It sounds more like a sob. “Really? You wanna do this right now?”

“Well, yeah. Now you have to. I’m guilt tripping you, Bobbie.”

“Asshole,” she laughs more genuine, holds him a little tighter. “Just for that? I will and when it goes wrong, like I know it will? I’m going to spit on your grave.”

“That’s not very threatening,” he turns best he can, grinning at her. “What if I’m into that?”

“Gross, dude! Don’t make me think about that when you’re dying in my arms!”

He closes his eyes, grinning wider. He’s not worried when he finds them too heavy to open again. “Why not? This is… the best time.”

“I hate you.”

“Yeah. I love you too.”

He’d people say that actually dying is like falling asleep. In fiction, they make it sound so simple and easy. He expected that, to feel like he just… slips away. He doesn’t know where he expects to go, but somewhere.

He’s confused when people start to panic. He’s aware of Robin shaking him, trying to wake him up, pleading with him. He can hear Lucas pointing out that he isn’t breathing. He knows that the emergency workers find their way to them then, through the mess and rubble, and they do everything they can to resuscitate him. He knows that those things happen.

But it doesn’t feel like him. He feels disconnected. Nothing he does to try and move or talk work. He feels afloat, drifting. It’s so dark. Robins voice, already strangely muffled, quietens. It doesn’t matter how hard he tries to hold onto the sound, onto her voice. It slides through his fingers like water.

He had hoped that death would be more peaceful.

He wakes up.

It’s so bright, disorientating. There’s voice around him, in the distance, but he can’t see anyone. He can’t see anything. He tries to crouch, to feel along the floor, but there’s nothing. He isn’t even sure he’s feeling ground beneath him. All he has is the sense that he’s touching the bottom of something.

“Hello?” He calls. He tries to stand, throwing his arms out when he nearly loses his balance. “Hello?! Robin? Hey! Can anyone hear me?” He spins, looking around desperately. “Hey?!”

He’s not sure how long he yells. His throat doesn’t get sore, his voice doesn’t get hoarse and he doesn’t feel tired. He isn’t sure if a minute or an hour passes. There is nothing. He doesn’t even feel tired.

He sits, hugs his knees close.

Maybe he needs to wait for something, he wonders. A guide or something. Someone who will show him where he needs to go. A guide to the real afterlife. A guide out of purgatory.

He refuses to accept this nothingness as the end. He closes his eyes, determined to wait. Determined that, when he does open his eyes, there will be a way out. A way to something better. A way to somewhere better. A way to heaven.

It feels almost like a jolt goes through him. The sensation of ears popping as an airplane lifts, but in his entire being.

He lifts his head, freezing when he looks around Eddies trailer.

It doesn’t look like it did when he was there last. Everything is intact. It’s warm, the low yellow lights giving the small spaces a cozy feel. There’s no tear into the Upside Down, no vines and no mess from investigators trying to find clues of Eddies whereabouts. It’s clean in a way that is unfamiliar to Steve.

There’s music.

Steve slowly climbs to his feet, creeping towards the hall. The music is coming from Eddies room. The door is shut, light illuminating the edges. A shadow disturbs the light, someone moving inside.

For a moment, he stares. It feels like a lump is stuck in his throat. The hope burning in his heart almost painful.

“Eddie?” He eventually calls out.

There’s a thud from inside the room. More soon follow. The door is flung open, Eddie standing there for a long moment. He looks just like he did when he was alive and well. An Iron Maiden shirt, ripped jeans and wild hair. His face isn't sunken with stress and hunger. Beautiful.

His eyes are wide, his expression frozen in confusion and concern.

“Steve?” He chokes out. “No. No, no, no.” He stumbles over, grabs his shoulders. He looks at Steve like he’s the one seeing a ghost. “What happened? What- oh god, no, Dustin, is he-?”

“He’s ok,” Steve interrupts. Clarity is a weird thing for him, everything slowly sinking in. “They all are. We won. Vecnas dead.”

“So are you.”

“They can live without me.” He shrugs, tries to look casual. “I was just the babysitter. They don’t need me.”

“You’re an idiot,” Eddie gently smacks the back of his head. “When Henderson gets here, in like eighty years, I’m telling him you said that.”

“Where is here, exactly?”

“Fuck if I know. Some sort of afterlife. I woke up in a void, wished I could go home and then I was here. I was hoping I’d be lonely for longer.” He glares at Steve when he says that last part, narrowing his eyes. “Which you have ruined, thank you very much.”

“So it takes you where you wish to go?” Steve clarifies. He laughs when Eddie nods.

“What? Where were you wishing to go, Harrington?”

“Heaven.”

Eddie barks a laugh, gesturing for Steve to follow him to his bedroom. “I think someone fucked up your order.”

Steve watches him flop down onto his bed, grinning. He doesn’t stop moving, one leg bouncing, one of his hands already playing with his hair. He raises an eyebrow, impatient.

Alive.

"I think they got it just right.”

“Keep talking like that and I might just kiss you.”

“Promise?”

Eddie throws a pillow at him. “You’re a tease, you know that?”

He laughs, throwing the pillow right back, diving down after it. They wrestle for the pillow for a while, eventually calling a truce. Eddies face is flushed. He gives one last half-hearted smack with the pillow, earning a giggle from Steve.

“How long do you think you'll stay here?” Eddie eventually asks. “I’ve been to the old Cunningham place a few times. Chrissys doing better.”

“As long as you'll have me. I've got no where to be."

Eddie cautiously reaches out for his hand, smiling a little pleased when Steve entwines their fingers. "With little ol' me?"

"Yeah," Steve turns to look at him, smiling. "Knew you less than a week and I was already missing you more than my parents. You're stuck with me until you throw me out."

"What if I never throw you out? What if I want you to stay here?"

"Then I'll stay here."

"What, for the rest of eternity?"

"Oh, for sure." He lifts their hands up, making sure Eddie is looking him in the eyes when he kisses his hand. He bites back a smirk when Eddie flushes. "Eternity sounds lovely. Exactly what I wished for."

[thegreencanary]

It’s Always Been You

Based on this request

Pairing: Billy Hargrove x Fem! Reader (you + Y/N)

Summary: You come home from college during holidays and to see your friends again. .Reconnecting with the core group that you connected with during the Upside Down trauma. Steve hosts a party for you and you get a little rowdy, Billy has always been there for you; this time something else happens.

TW: cursing and drinking. That’s about it. It’s pretty tame!

A/N: this is my work, I don’t give anyone permission to use it for anything or claim it as their own.

The sound of passing cars lulled you into an easy sleep as you got comfortable in the bus seat. Two more hours and you’d be back in Hawkins with your best friends. The only good thing about that pimple of a city: Nancy, Robin, Steve, Eddie, Jonathan, a bunch of weird kids and of course…Billy. The thought of your high school crush made you smile, you two had stayed in touch when you left for school, but seeing him again was a different level of excitement. He’d joined Hawkins High during your junior year in high school and at first; you despised him. His cocky attitude and the amount of girlfriends he plowed through disgusted you. BUT, he came with Max who became close friends with your best friends brother, then all the Vecna craziness broke out and somehow you got roped into a tight knit friend group with Billy. The real change in your friendship happened after Starcourt.

Pulled from your thoughts, the bus stopped and you could hear yelling at the us stop. Groggily you looked out the window but pure happiness and excitement filled your body as you saw your friends outside with signs, yelling for you. Steve and Robin were making fools of themselves but you ran to them as soon as your feet hit the pavement. Comforting arms wrapped around you and you felt like you could finally relax.

“Welcome home!!!!” Steve grunted out as he squeezed you and moved back and forth. Robin hit your arm playfully.

“That’s for leaving us for your fancy school.” She smiled and hugged you. “This is for coming back to visit.”

Grabbing your bags from the bus, you quickly loaded into Steve’s car and the three of you talked and laughed all the way back to his house. His parents were on some European trip or something so he just had you stay with him. Upon opening the door to his house, you heard a resounding “SURPRISE!” as a smaller body smashed into you. Maxine, she’d ran to you and gave you a tight hug; soon followed by the rest of the kids and then your friends.

“I missed you guys too.” A chuckle escaped your lips as you tried to stay standing from the overwhelming amount of people around you.

“Jesus Christ! Let her put her shit down at least, you are gonna suffocate her.”

There it was. That beautiful voice, you tried to see him, but Some of the guys too tall and blocking your view. Suddenly, you felt someone slip your backpack off and move your bags out of your grip. Strong, tanned arms wrapped around your shoulders and a familiar chin rested on your head. Billy.

“Hello to you too Billy.” You blushed softly, trying to laugh off his nice way of getting everyone off of you. The smell of cigarettes and motor oil filled the air around you. His smile could be felt from the top of your head.

“Welcome back short stack.” He squeezed you gently, then after just a few moments too long, (or not long enough) he let you go and grabbed your bags.

“Harrington! I’m putting her in your parents room!”

He called out to Steve who was grabbing some stuff out of his trunk. Max still hadn’t left your side and she had a brightness to her blue eyes. There was a soft spot in you for her and you wrapped on arm around her shoulder.

“Been keeping everyone in line?” You asked. They’d all went back to setting up stuff like balloons and streamers.

“Of course.” She smiled back. “Come on, Billy and I are staying here and there are some things I want to show you in my room.” The younger red head pulled you away from everyone.

“What’s the big set up for?” You asked as you passed the kitchen with a boat load of food and beer.

“Steve’s throwing a party for you tonight.”

Great. You’d hope to get a little sleep, but your friends were a rowdy bunch. Nancy was known for getting a little too drunk a little too fast; but Jonathan usually kept an eye out for her. Steve, you and Robin usually became the parents as Billy would get hammered and Eddy would get blitzed. You weren’t thrilled at the idea that the kids were gonna be around but Max could sense the hesitation so she spoke up.

“Don’t worry. We’re all going over to Hoppers tonight. El said to say hi, she’s busy with her dad doing super power shit.”

That was good. You relaxed a bit more and followed Max to the guest room.

———

You’d managed to sneak away from everyone and finally you got to your room. It was wonderful to see everyone again, but the silence was needed to prepare for the party. Plopping down on the bed you exhaled and closed your eyes. There was a comfortable nature to Steve’s home, and you’d joked before about how he should open a home for wayward kids; since everyone always found a safe place with him. The thought of Max and Billy staying there too was nice, but it meant Neil was worse than ever. Billy had kept you updated on their lives but he never spoke about Neil unless it was really bad. Last time Billy wrote to you (Which he would never admit to writing you letters, but he did every month) he mentioned moving out and getting his own place…maybe Steve’s place was just a temporary set up.

“You look like shit.”

Opening your eyes you smiled to find baby blue eyes staring down at you. He was being playful, but you still sat up and tried to adjust your hair and outfit.

“I was on a bus for hours, how did you think I was going to look?”

He sat next to you and pulled you back down so you both were laying down. The blush on your cheeks only heated up.

“It’s good to have you back. I can’t stand these idiots.” You laughed, nudging him softly.

“I’m just like those idiots.”

“Not even close.”

There was a comfortable silence that settled between you two. This was a side of Billy that only you got to see, the calm man that lie behind the troubled sea that was his heart. He’d worked on his anger and his friendships but you always saw past his facades.

“You doin’ okay? School and shit going good?” His arm was wrapped around your shoulder and you nuzzled your head into his chest. It was very intimate but you two had moments like this in the past; you both just never addressed it.

“Mmhmm. How’s the shop?” Billy had started work at the town auto shop, and from what she knew of it; he was doing great.

“Good. Finally got a place for Max and I. We’re just crashing here until its ready. It’s not much, a trailer in Eddie’s neighborhood… but it’s mine.”

You sat up and looked at him, a different feeling settling in the air.

“I’m so proud of you Billy.”

A beat passed, then there was a knock at your door.

“Y/N! Are you ready? People are starting to show up! Do you need help with anything?”

Nancy. God Bless her for checking on you because you were about to kiss Billy and you couldn’t ruin that friendship. He rolled his eyes and got up, almost ripping the door off.

“She’s all yours Wheeler.”

Nancy rolled her eyes but came in, as Billy walked out he looked back and winked at you.

————————

Hair done, outfit on and makeup finished. Looking in the mirror you checked to make sure the ripped Band Tee didn’t show too much off, because the black leather shorts were a little too short but Nancy insisted they looked good. She paraded you out into the party and there were A LOT of people. Some just cheering because they were drunk and didn’t care why the party was happening, just that it was. Others you actually knew and you caught up with them a little as drinks and shots were placed in your hand in a revolving order.

Billy was outside, you could hear the keg stand chants, Robin was on the couch with a girl named Vickie, Eddie and Jonathan were probably out getting high and Nancy was circulating. You were, put nicely, smashed. There was no reason to hold back, you weren’t driving, you were in a safe place and your friends were all around.

Standing on a table, with some outside help from a few guys, you yelled over the music.

“Thank yeeew all for comin! LEts PARTY!” Someone cranked up the music and you started dancing on the table, and the cheering got louder than the keg stand cheers. That got Billy’s attention.

He came in to find you, someone who wasn’t too keen on being the center of attention, on a table; dancing like no one was watching. At first he just chuckled and laughed, but the guys who had helped you up were a little too close for his liking. He inched closer, but the moment one of the guys put his hand on your leg, Billy moved. Pushing people out of the way, he got to the table and threw you over his shoulder.

“Awww boo!” You giggled as he carried you up to the room you were staying in.

“Billy!!!! I was having funnnn.” You playfully hit his back before he put you on the bed.

“Oooo kinky!” A giggle left your lips as you took another sip of the beer that didn’t leave your hand even through Billy manhandling you.

“Alright princess, you’ve had enough for tonight.” He took your beer and you pouted.

“Party poooper! This princess wants to keep going!” You reached out for the beer but he stopped you, and the two of you were very close.

“Hi handsOme.” A drunken smile bloomed on your face and the glaze over your eyes began to set in. Yep, totally drunk. Billy just laughed and shook his head, placing a soft kiss on your forehead.

“You’ll thank me tomorrow.” Again, there was something else that settled in the air, but this time you were more confident. Liquid courage and all that fun shit.

“I’m gonna kiss you.” You giggled and got closer. An expression you hadn’t seen crossed Billy’s face and you paused…oh no.

“Oh…oh no I fucked up. Shit!!!” You immediately pulled away and scooted your back against the headboard. Pulling your knees to your chest, you began to rock back and forth. Did you just screw up your best friendship? Did you read all the signs wrong? Was he going to hate you?

“Shit.” Billy groaned and stood up. “Y/N, I would love to kiss you, but not like this. Get some rest baby. We’ll talk tomorrow.”

Baby, that was a new one. You looked up at him worried, but he winked and you relaxed. The room was spinning, maybe rest was a good idea. The loud party didn’t even bother you. Dozing off quickly you didn’t even notice Billy lock the door for your safety on his way out.

————-

Getting hit by a semi carrying other semi’s felt ten thousand times better than the hangover that hit you in the morning. Groaning you pulled yourself into the bathroom, looking in the mirror you shuddered. You also looked like you got hit by a semi. Taking a deep breath you hopped into the shower and tried to wash off the night before.

A soft knock got your attention as you got out. Keeping just your towel on you tried to open the door only to realize it was locked. Unlocking it, you found Billy before you with breakfast.

“God Bless you.” You smiled and took the food. He was quiet, looking at you in a towel. Billy needed to compose himself before speaking, he didn’t expect you to open the door so… freely. What if it was someone who passed out in the living room? That thought pulled him into the room and he shut the door so no one else could see you.

“Here.”

He handed you some ibuprofen and you smiled.

“You are the best Billy. How did you did this every weekend??” Downing the pills with some water he watched you and just chuckled.

“Practice babe.”

That threw you for a little bit of a loop but it sounded familiar.

“What happened last night? I remember talking to Vanessa but it gets a little fuzzy after that.”

Billy grabbed a few poloriads Nancy took out of his back pocket. You went red in the face.

“I WAS TABLE DANCING??” Groaning, you sunk to the floor with your food, nibbling on pancakes as you looked through the photos.

“WHy did anyone let me get on Bruce’s shoulders??” Bruce was your class clown and he apparently piggy backed you around according to Nancy’s photos. Billy scoffed.

“I sure as shit didn’t. You don’t remember anything?” There was a vulnerability to his voice that made you look up at him curiously.

“Oh no, what did I do?”

He sat next to you, resting his head on the edge of the bed. It was obvious he was trying to decide if he should tell you or not.

“You almost kissed me.”

Deer in headlights, that was a good way to explain your expression. Burying your face in your hands, the common symptom of puking while your hungover began to surface.

“Fuck I’m so sorry Billy. I don’t get drunk I didn’t know that’s what I would do. Shit, I’m really sorry.”

For some reason, you felt Billy relax next to you.

“So you don’t get drunk at school?” The image of you dancing on tables away from his protective gaze and you offering to kiss strangers had haunted him the whole night. Of course you could do whatever you wanted, the two of you were just friends, but he didn’t want that.

“Of course not, I don’t feel safe to drink that much at school. I don’t know people there like I do here. I don’t have you to keep me safe.”

You looked at the photo of him carrying you away, he always was there for you. Maybe it was because you helped save his life in Starcourt, or maybe it was because he truly cared about you.

“Why don’t you come back?”

His voice was quiet. That question hit you hard, and you rubbed your forehead.

“Billy it’s not that easy, with school and…”

“No, I know. It was a dumb question. I just…I don’t like you not being here. I need to make sure you’re okay. Phone calls and letters aren’t enough. I…get worried if you don’t answer the phone or if I miss a letter.”

This was a new Billy. He’d been open with you before but never like this. He wasn’t looking at you so you gently put a hand on his face and nudged it to look at you.

“Hey, I’m okay. All that is over with. It’s safe now. I’m okay.”

He closed his eyes and leaned into your touch. You two had playfully gotten close before but this was real and really intimate.

“Billy?”

He opened his eyes and looked at you, but it was for a split second before his lips were on yours. The kiss caught you off guard but after a moment, you returned it. Moving to straddle him you wrapped your arms around his neck while his hands settled on your hips. You lost time in his kiss and it was the safest you’d ever felt.

Finally the two of you separated, when he squeezed your hips softly. Any more and the two of you wouldn’t be able to stop.

“I’ve been wanting to do that for a long time.” He smirked as he rested his forehead on yours.

“Me too.”

“Come on, you need to eat…tell anyone about me being sappy and I’ll break up with you.”

He slightly joked.

“Oh so were dating now?”

You giggled and tried to get off of him, but he didn’t let you go just yet.

“Y/N, I’ve thought of you as my girlfriend ever since the summer before you left. You’re it baby. I don’t need anyone else.”

You kissed him softly, then got off of him.

“I’m yours Billy Hargrove.”

“Good.”

————————————-

The End!

Constructive criticism is welcome! DM’s are open! I hope this was to y’all’s liking! I got a little carried away sorry about that! I almost made it into two parts but I decided against it.

Thank you for reading!!!

[steviewashere]

It would've been so cool if during the scene when Steve hears Dustin "in the walls" of the Wheeler's house, he's the only one who could hear it.

Like he tries to tell the others that Dustin's there or his voice is there. But in reality, it's Steve being lured in by Vecna.

And Dustin's voice goes from normal talking to something panicked. A danger is lurking kind of panicked. And Steve's protective instincts kick in and he can't turn that part of him off. He's just stuck in fight mode for too long. Getting jumpy and putting himself in front of the others. Nancy, Robin, and Eddie think it's weird, but get more and more concerned the more that time passes and Steve is...panicked beyond belief, gasping and hiccuping at every sound, spinning in place, arms up and blocking, eyes wide and searching, silently listening and uncharacteristically serious. He gets to the point where all he can hear around him is the screaming for help from the party members. And the only thing that gets him resolved is a tape playing and somebody holding onto him, urging him to relax.

The moment he thinks it's safe to take his headphones off (because he thinks the screaming and the urgent voices have stopped) Vecna gets him in his hold. And oddly, the only way that gets Steve away from Vecna and back to regular Hawkins, is the genuine urgent pleading of his friends, begging for him to come back to them. To fight Vecna's control and to follow their voices. (Whereas before, the panicked words were coming from everywhere with no sign of stopping, no real instruction as to where the disembodied voices were coming from.)

Also, Steve would definitely offer himself as bait in the Creel house. Imagine he gets Vecna'd and the other person there with him is Robin. And he dies in his best friend's arms. But this time, Robin realizes his death is very real. She knows what holding a limp and bleeding and broken body is like. She knows what it's like being present for the death of Steve Harrington. And all she can think, besides the obvious that her best friend is dead, is that she didn't sign up for this. (But she'd do it all over again if it meant that Steve didn't die in the end.)

Obviously, he wouldn't die. But imagine the angst. Imagine him coming back to himself in the hospital. He comes back different, not wrong, but different. He's no longer playful. Doesn't want to talk. Always staring, unfocused and frightened. Doesn't even care that his key feature, his hair, has been shaved down from how unruly it got during his time in the hospital. He's a shadow of himself. Lingering in what Vecna inflicted onto him. Not placing himself as an outcast, constantly outside of the group. In fact, he's practically too intertwined with everybody. Too much in people's space. Fitting himself between gaps. Needing to be close. Needing to be alert. Barely sleeps. And if he does, it isn't for long, awoken by voices. Has to call everybody, hear their voices soft and natural. Doesn't seek out romantic relationships because he knows he won't be able to explain what happened to him. He's overprotective and awfully afraid. Can't sit in silences because he imagines his friend's screams.

And even when he dates Eddie (because I'm going to make this Steddie, bite me), he is content to just listen to Eddie ramble. On and on. Doesn't allow him to stop. Will ask questions if only to keep the silence at bay. Needs to be close in his sleep. Needs the constant touch and the constant affection. Needs to be reassured. Won't leave Robin's side either. At work or in social functions. She relies on him and he relies on her. They often have late night phone calls that stretch on for hours. Steve in his kitchen, hunched over the phone at his island, repeating over and over that he's alive and reasonably okay. And Robin on the other side, comforting him that everybody is safe and that she's not in danger and nobody is going to need him this late at night. Eddie getting out of bed to Steve slumped and asleep at the counter, phone still tight in his grip. Lugging him to the couch to sleep. Sitting nearby, on the floor or at Steve's feet. One hand on his ankle or his wrist or on his shaved scalp.

Just Steve growing dependent on everybody. Instead of them being dependent on him. And also being tremendously traumatized. And just...abnormal.

Anyway. Maybe I'll write this. If not, here's an idea lol.

[aloneinthehellfire]

Chapter Three: Bad Dreams

The Pariahs That Saved The World [Masterlist]

Word Count: 3.4k

Warnings: mentions of death, lots of angst

[A/N: I even surprised myself at the ending of this. Whatever my original plan for this series was has now been thrown out of the window just because I can never write without the angst-]

Bad Dreams

“Creepy.” You comment, staring up at the house in front of you.

“Can say that again.” Steve sighs, hands on his hips as he joins you.

“Creepy.” You repeat, smirking while you walk away with his irritated gaze on your back.

The Creel House stood tall despite its worn down exterior, the blackening wood and peeling paint only adding to the horrors you’ve heard of this place. Everything had been boarded up, blocking people from coming and going as they please. You’re just surprised they had never torn down the place.

Nancy and Steve grabbed some of Mr Wheeler’s borrowed tools and start working on the door, trying to tug out the nails holding it in place. You stand with your arms folded beside Robin, sending worried glances at Max every so often. You couldn’t help it, and you hoped she couldn’t feel your anxiety.

“I mean, what exactly are we looking for in this shithole?” Steve groans, discarding a nail on the ground.

“We’re not sure.” Nancy says and you clear your throat.

“This house is important to Vecna.” You speak up and you feel Robin’s eyes on you, making you feel hotter than you should. “Max wouldn’t have seen it in that mind world if it wasn’t.”

“Great.” Steve grumbles.

“Maybe it holds the key to where Vecna is. Why he’s back… Why he killed the Creels.” Dustin suggests, shrugging. “And how to stop him before he comes back for Max.”

“We don’t think he’s in here, do we?” Lucas voices and Max tightens her lips.

“Guess we’ll find out.”

With an agreed nod, Steve and Nancy pull back the board and let it thump onto the ground, the force whisking away leaves on the porch. Robin notices Max’s widened eyes and looks at the revealed door, viewing a stained glass window of a blue rose. Just like in her drawings.

The door rattles when Steve tries to open it, shoulders dropping in defeat.

“It’s locked.” He says and you snort, earning his glare. “Should I knock, see if anybody’s home?”

“Maybe Vecna is out grocery shopping.” You offer, trying to lessen the obviously tense mood of the whole situation. “Could always see if there’s another entrance…”

The comfort of Robin’s presence disappears from your side and you turn to see her grabbing something from the ground.

“No need.” She announces, holding up a discarded brick and smirking at you. “I found a key.”

“Innovative.” You smile, your eyes lingering a moment too long on eachother before you clear your throat and step aside, allowing her to launch the brick through the stained glass window.

You all could hear the brick rattling in an echo on the other side of the door before Steve slips his arm through the man-made hole and twists the door open, an eerie creak playing tricks with your mind.

Steve lets out a low whistle as you follow Nancy through, your boots crunching on sprinkled shards. It was dark in here, the dust forming a thick cloud even in the air as you squint. You feel Robin’s shoulder bump against yours and you look over to see her motioning to her flashlight. You nod, sticking by her side as everyone else piles in.

“Looks like someone forgot to pay their electric bill.” Lucas quips, standing back from the failed attempt at turning on a lamp.

Everyone immediately switches on their flashlights, leaving Steve puzzled.

“Where’d everyone get those?” He frowns and Dustin sends him a look.

“Do you need to be told everything? You’re not a child.”

“Thank you.” Steve deadpans, noticing your mouth opening slightly. “Don’t say another word.”

“I wasn’t gonna say anything.” You defend and he shakes his head. Robin hides a smirk, revelling in the fact that someone other than her could make him fidget like that.

“Uh-huh. Sure.”

“Back pocket.” Dustin hands his backpack over with a sigh, letting Steve pull out a spare flashlight and dump it on the ground when he was done.

You, Robin, and Nancy head into the first room you see, their flashlights sweeping over the place. Ratted curtains, dusty frames and untouched furniture told Robin this used to be a lounge, her eyes focusing on the old books scattered across the place. A family once used this space for leisure, and now they were dead.

“They just left everything.” Nancy frowns.

“I guess a triple homicide isn’t good for resale value.” Robin says and you feel your heartbeat quicken.

Four years ago, you had been investigating this place, the family, the murders, unsure of what you were going to discover. So much had been redacted and forgotten, making you think that maybe it was just another freak accident, that maybe the father did kill his family out of insanity. But part of you couldn’t believe that. You wanted to know the truth. Now that you did… you wished you had never started researching in the first place. For four years, you’ve been letting yourself be haunted by this place and its stories. You weren’t ready to know what made things go bump in the night.

“Hey, guys?” Max’s voice calls out from the hallway. She was stood in front of a grandfather clock, it’s age well past any working function. “You all see that, right?”

You all murmur in agreement and you frown, staring at the face with intensity. You had seen this before. In a record somewhere, presumably, but you couldn’t remember Victor mentioning anything about a clock. Why was this important?

“Is this what you saw? In your visions?” Nancy asks and Max nods, gulping.

“I mean, it’s… just a clock. Right?” Robin tries to calm her, gently moving past and wiping a hand across the dusty glass. “Like a normal old clock.”

“A normal old clock that wasn’t there before.” You mutter to yourself and Nancy looks at you expectedly. You only shake your head, unsure of how you could even explain anything you didn’t even know.

“Why is this wizard obsessed with clocks?” Steve shakes his head. “Maybe he’s, like, a clockmaker or something?”

“Think you cracked the case, Steve.” Dustin spits sarcastically.

“All I know is… the answers are here. Somewhere.” Nancy looks at you again, brows furrowed. “Right?”

“Nance-” You whisper, but she’s already turning away.

“Okay, everyone stay in groups of no less than two. Robin, Y/n, upstairs.” She commands and Robin salutes in agreement, stepping down from the clock and stopping by your side when she notices you haven’t moved.

Your eyes were still fixated on the clock and Robin places a hand on your arm.

“You okay?”

“Huh?” You peel your eyes away from the hands that remained frozen in time and blink at her. “Yeah. Yeah, let’s go.”

When you reach the top of the staircase, you still feel Robin’s eyes on you, making you turn back to meet her. There’s a soft frown on her face until it drops completely when she realises she’s been caught, coughing.

“What?” You say with a breathy laugh and she avoids your eyes, head down.

Shit. Fuck. Shit. Fuck. Robin feels like her entire body is flushing red just under your gaze. Why was she staring? Could she not be normal? She literally met you not even two days ago and she was already out of her mind trying to make you like her. As a friend, of course. It’s not safe to make assumptions like that in this town. Between you and Vickie, she was having the worst spring break of her life.

“Robin?” You call out to her again and she takes a deep breath, straightening up.

“Guys.” Nancy’s head pokes out of the doorway, gesturing for you both to join her. Robin exhales in relief and immediately walks away, leaving you a little dumbfounded.

“She does that.” Steve comments as he and Dustin come up the staircase behind you, a hand on his hip as he shakes his head at Robin’s retreating form. “Kind of reminds me of someone.”

“Who?” You frown and he stares at you for a moment too long, making your lips purse in annoyance.

“Bingo.” He says before Dustin eventually drags him away.

Robin’s flashlight illuminates a desk in a bedroom, the surface covered in cobwebs and dust. She tries to study the small things scattered across it; some books, perfume, a box. It kind of reminded her of Nancy’s room a little bit. The light shone onto the edge and her breath catches, brows furrowing. This part wasn’t as dusty as the rest.

“So,” Nancy comes back through the adjoining room she was investigating, smiling at Robin. “You and Y/n are…”

“What?” Robin almost drops her flashlight, muttering an excuse about Nancy making her jump. “Are, uh… are what?”

“Friends, I assume.” Nancy shakes her head like it was obvious, “You seem to be getting along.”

“Oh.” She nods, forcing herself to act casual as she inspects the shelves. “Yeah. I mean, she’s nice. I don’t really know her that well, though. And it’s only been like, what, a day? Obviously not enough time to know eachother but she’s cool, not like too cool for us kind of cool but cool like… yeah, she’s nice.”

Nancy hums, her smile growing when you walk into the room.

“What did I miss?” You ask, barely glancing at the room around you. Robin turns her head in your direction, looking at how you stood right next to the bed.

“Nothing.” Nancy sighs, looking around her one last time. “Maybe we’re approaching this the wrong way? I mean, the answers aren’t gonna be in plain sight.”

A massive crash echoes out from down the hall and Nancy’s eyes widen before she goes to investigate.

“Nice room, right?” Robin says and you blink, an unnatural head movement making you look around.

“Yeah, I guess. Could use a cleaner.” You add and she smiles, hearing Steve’s voice mutter something about a black widow. You mouth it at her in curiosity and she shrugs, following you to the noise.

“I got it.” Nancy says, picking something out of Steve’s hair as he lets out a breathy ‘thank you’.

“If there’s a spider nesting in there, you’re never gonna find it until it lays eggs and the babies spill out.” Robin says as you round the corner, making you laugh.

“What’s wrong with you?” Steve sighs in frustration and Robin chuckles. “Robin, seriously. She’s got problems.”

“Yeah.” Nancy agrees in a whisper and you roll your eyes. Some little part of you hated the way they talked about Robin.

“Did you get the spider?” You question her and she nods, “Shame. It might be the only thing that will ever be attracted by the amount of products you put into that hair.”

“Wha-” Steve turns in surprise, shaking his head. “Have you got a problem with me or something?”

“Ooh.” You blink, crossing your arms. “I don’t have the time in the day to even begin answering that.”

“Hey, you wanted to be here.” Steve frowns, both of you ignoring Nancy’s attempt at defusing the situation. “It’s not like I dragged you into this, why are you taking it out on me?”

“I have never once blamed you.” You scoff, “You’ve been nothing but shitty towards me since I got here.”

“Oh, and you’ve been a peach?” He challenges, making you narrow your eyes. “What is your problem with me?”

“Uh, guys? You’re both very pretty, how about we calm down?” Robin interjects this time, slightly taken aback by how furious you looked. Your eyes soften when you turn to her, however, losing that angry spark.

“Robin’s right, this isn’t the time.” Nancy says softly and your lips tighten.

“Right.” You slowly nod, a sad laugh leaving your lips. “We wouldn’t want emotions getting in the way.”

Robin watches as both of their faces drop, Nancy’s eyes widening while Steve started looking very uncomfortable. She knew about your dad, about how he had died like so many other people last year. But this didn’t look like guilt on their faces. It was regret.

“I think I saw another staircase, so…” You vaguely gesture behind you before taking off.

Robin hesitates for a moment before following you, rushing to your side. As soon as you hear her footsteps approach, you sigh.

“You don’t have to-”

“You need a light.” She says, flicking on her flashlight. “I also think you might need a friend.”

When you both turned the corner to the staircase you had in mind, you didn’t ascend them. Instead, you plop yourself down on one of the lower steps and put your head in your hands, feeling Robin’s comfort settle beside you.

For once in her life, Robin doesn’t speak first. She doesn’t try to fill the awkward silence with her forced ramble of words because she doesn’t feel like she has to. So, when you lift your head and take a deep breath, she knows she’s finally made the right choice.

“Last year…” You begin, turning your head towards her but never meeting her eyes. “I had to make a lot of decisions. A lot of them were easy, but… I swore to myself that I wouldn’t let anyone I love get hurt.”

“Your dad?” Robin asks quietly and you let out a breathy laugh, looking at her.

“I didn’t really have a good relationship with him.” You admit and she nods along, looking back at you like she knew exactly what you meant. “He worked at the Post. Um… I had been working there for a while after I graduated. I managed to get Nancy and Jonathan jobs there, too. He was one of the… he got flayed.”

“Shit.” Robin sighs and you nod. Nancy had only told her he died last year. She had no idea it was because of that thing.

“When he showed up at the hospital, I got… scared. All I wanted to do was run away.” Your face scrunches and she can tell you’re holding something back from her. “Um, Nancy and Jonathan convinced me to stay, told me they needed me there. And I ended up getting hurt. It’s not… I don’t blame them. It was my decision. They just… it’s hard to explain.”

“So you went to college.” Robin nods along and you smile at her. “I would’ve done the same. If I was even out of high school yet. God, I completely forgot about that part.”

“Spring break, right?” You smirk at her and she laughs, clapping her hands.

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure everyone else is in, like, Spain or something. But what could ever compare to hunting down an evil wizard from an alternate dimension?”

“Honestly, they’re missing out.” You joke and, for a moment, you completely forgot about why you were sat here with her in the first place. But then that anger creeps in again, caged emotions you’ve been tucking away into the back of your mind threatening to break free. “I think… I think it was a bad idea for me to come.”

“What?” Robin’s head whips up, eyebrows scrunching together beneath her bangs. “No, we- we need you here.”

“Do you?” You ask, scrunching your face again. “Everything you guys know right now, that’s all I have to offer you. I wanna be here for Max, I really do, but I don’t think it’s a good idea for me to be here when I obviously can’t-”

You gesture to the direction of where you had left Steve and Nancy, sighing. Robin was quiet and you started to think that maybe she was agreeing with you. You were only causing arguments and living in your feelings from the past, dishing out the blame like it wasn’t your choice to stay at that hospital.

“I think you know more than you’re telling us.”

Your wide eyes find Robin’s, her own still remained soft and inquisitive, studying your reaction.

“I don’t-”

“You knew where this staircase was.” She stops you, looking behind her at where it trailed up, “Except, you couldn’t have just noticed this here. We couldn’t see it from the main staircase, and Nancy never led us over in this direction.”

You hear Lucas’ voice call for everyone and you stand up, clearing your throat. “We should-”

“I kept seeing cleaner spaces everywhere.” Robin stands and holds out her arm to block you from leaving. “The bedroom, I- I saw a spot that wasn’t as dusty as the others, like someone more recent than the Creels had been in there. And when you walked in, you didn’t even try and look around, like you had seen it all before.”

Your breath hitches in your throat and Robin’s eyes widen.

“Because you have been here before.” She frowns at you, and she’s never seen you look so small. “Y/n. Have you been here before?”

“Guys?” Steve’s voice calls out from below as you struggle to answer her. His feet come bounding up the steps, peering around the corner to find you both staring at one another. “Hey, hope I’m not interrupting or whatever, but we’ve got company.”

When Robin doesn’t answer, he raises his hands in surrender and backs away. “Whatever, just be ready.”

“He’s here.” You whisper out when Steve was out of earshot, your begging eyes set on Robin. “Robin, we can’t be here, it’s not safe.”

She starts to shake her head, feeling like her heartbeat was thrumming in her ears. “What-”

The flashlight in her hand starts flickering wildly, a rush of footsteps echoing out from the hallway. Nancy mentions something about following Vecna, the lights leading them up the staircase and straight past you both, assuming you’d be following.

“What’s up there?” She asks, her voice almost inaudible.

“The attic.” You say, shaking your head as if you were surprised you even knew it. “Robin, I don’t-”

“Have you been lying to us?” She questions, chest heaving. “Did you know what was going on this whole time?”

“No!” You grab onto her jacket when she moves towards the stairs. “No, Robin, please, you have to believe me. I had no idea who Vecna was, I didn’t know any of this was going to happen! I- I don’t-”

“You don’t, what?” She challenges, staring at you like she was afraid. “How do you know what’s up there, how did you know about the bedroom-”

“Because I dreamt about it!” You finally blurt, a tear slipping down your cheek. She looks startled, frozen in place, and you take the chance to finally explain yourself. “Four years ago, I had a really vivid dream about a house, about murders. I- I thought it was just another nightmare, but something didn’t feel right about it so I researched and that’s when I found out about the Creel massacre. That’s why I started researching it in the first place. I wanted to know why I was seeing it. When I couldn’t find any photos of the place, I broke in here. I told myself it was just for research, but I… I started looking everywhere, and I couldn’t find it- I couldn’t…”

“Find what?” She almost slips on a step as she moves back towards you, a fearful look in her eye.

“The clock.” You say, wiping your tear. “I remember seeing a clock in my dream, and it wasn’t here. Not before, not when I looked. But then Max found it, and I- I don’t know what’s happening, I can’t- I can’t explain any of it but I just have this really bad feeling that we shouldn’t be here, we shouldn’t-”

The light in Robin’s hand starts beaming brighter, making her drop it out of shock. It rolled across the ground, hitting the bottom step of the staircase and then, without warning, it shattered completely.

You both jump, Robin’s hand grabbing your arm as she looks away. You can both hear the murmurs from the attic, telling you this was happening to everyone. And, for some reason, you felt numb. Completely numb.

When Robin finally shakes away her fear, she lifts her head, closer to you now than before. There was a trickle stain of a tear running down your cheek, your bottom lip red from where you would gnaw on it constantly when you were stressed. There was so much about you she didn’t know, so much you probably would never tell anyone else.

“I promise.” You start, bringing your eyes to meet hers. “I will tell you everything. But you can’t tell anyone else. Please.”

Fuck, Robin thought, staring back into your eyes. How could she say no to you?

taglist: @kryztalglear / @dejerw / @officerrrfriendly / @a-simpfortessa-lesbriean / @spacedoutdaydreamer / @endurexxsurvive / @em16cor / @gray-cheese / @chaosofmanyfandoms / @kitdjarin1

[thefreakandthehair]

@eddiemonth prompt, oct 9th: Cowboy | Wanted Dead or Alive - Bon Jovi | Cavalier a/n: steddie, post-canon fix it, brief mention of canonical harassment, brief allusion to survivor's guilt. un-betaed because I’m challenging myself to write these in under an hour. read on ao3 | link to masterpost on ao3

The sun rises over a leveled Hawkins, bright streaks of sunlight illuminating the cracks and crevices that spider through the town. Fractals that remind Eddie Munson of what’s occurred over the past week since the world first split open. 

A week of chaos, of death, of fear. A week of discovering that monsters are real, and that while the ones beneath their feet are terrifying, the ones that hunt Eddie above ground are somehow worse. 

The people who still think he’s a murderer, despite being publicly cleared, are far worse than Vecna. They taunt Wayne, deface his posters with things like Dead or Alive on his missing posters, show up at his work to torment him. 

It’s why eventually, they have to tell Wayne that he’s dead. Eddie hates it, the idea of leaving Wayne in the dark, but he knows that Nancy’s right and it’s the best way to keep everyone safe. Dustin offers to deliver the news complete with his favorite, now-bloodied, guitar pick chain.

He’s just a kid, Eddie thinks, hiding in Steve’s basement for the time being, his wounds healing slowly. 

Dustin’s just a kid, and he sobs when he tells Wayne not because Eddie’s actually dead, but because Wayne is devastated and Dustin has to lie. 

Months pass, and Eddie is still considered missing despite everyone’s story that he was swallowed up saving Dustin from a crevice that’d opened beneath their feet. 

No body, no absolution. Not for Eddie. 

“We can’t keep him holed up here,” Steve groans, running a hand through his hair as he sits on the couch between Eddie and Robin. “It’s not fair.” 

“What do you suppose we do then, Steve? The town still…” Nancy grimaces and trails off. 

“Yeah, they want me dead, sure. Let ‘em take a crack at it.” Eddie says, monotone and cavalier. “That sounded bad, but seriously, what kind of life is this? Steve’s basement’s fine, but what’s the plan? I just stay here for the rest of my life, hiding? I’d rather be–”

Steve turns and levels him with a glare that needs no words. They’ve talked about this, time after time, that making comments about preferring to be dead are a personal insult to the people who love him, who fought tooth and nail to save him the way he saved them. 

He cuts himself off, shakes his head. “What else can we do?” 

Dustin is in the corner with the other kids, talking amongst themselves, until Lucas speaks up. 

“Someone who knows what’s actually going on has to get him away, outta town. Start over.” 

The older teens share a glance, Jonathan and Argyle shrugging in tandem. “California’s pretty far. We’re not going back but, we could set you up with some good people out there.” 

“He can’t just go alone though, he’s barely healed!” Robin reminds the group of Eddie’s extensive injuries, healed on the surface but not all the way through. They may never be healed all the way through. 

Eddie sighs and drops his head into his hands, elbows propped on his knees. He tries to disguise the way his shoulders shake, tries to bite back the helpless, hopeless sobs that threaten to rip through his rib cage. He doesn’t want to cry in front of his friends, and the few times he’s broken down in front of Steve, it’s pulled painfully at the tendons in his chest. 

He feels Robin rub his back and Steve rests a hand on his thigh, thumbing small circles into the fabric of his sweatpants. Well, they were once Steve’s but he can’t even go back to the trailer to salvage what he can of his things. He can’t even go get Sweetheart, not that he thinks he’ll ever be comfortable playing her again. 

“What if I go with him?” Steve suggests, quietly enough that Eddie’s the only one to hear him clearly. 

“What?” Dustin questions, stepping forward with the rest of the kids. 

“I said, what if I go with him? I know what’s going on, my body’s recovered, and let’s call a spade a spade here, I’m the only one without parents around to question where I went. So, what if I go with Eddie to California?”

Eddie’s chest pulls for different reasons— this time, with hope and gratitude, with love and affection. 

“Steve, I’m not asking you to do that,” he whispers, turning to face him individually. “You have a whole life here.” 

“We’ll come visit, and he can come back to visit, too. And eventually, you’ll be declared dead here. You can start over.” Robin slings an arm over Eddie’s shoulders and squeezes him, a rare show of physical intimacy. Her voice is melancholic at best, but the more the group discusses the option, the more it seems like the only option. 

At least for now. 

At least while Eddie remains a wanted man. 

They waste no time packing up the Pizzamobile, offered as a gift to travel across the country with the provision that Steve return it to Surfer Boy when they reach California. 

Eddie and Steve refuse to say goodbye, because it’s not. Robin promises that all of her college applications are now going to California schools, and she hugs Steve and Eddie tight enough that if love could click Eddie’s injuries back in place, he’d be healed immediately. 

As they get on the road, Steve at the helm and Eddie sitting passenger, Eddie finds that Argyle has a vast cassette collection. 

“Little soundtrack, Stevie?” Eddie wiggles the tape between his fingers and pops it into the tape deck. 

The song starts and after the first verse, Eddie just stares out the windshield, thinking. 

When he was a kid, outlaws and cowboys were glamorized. Always on the run, nothing to tether them to one place, living alone out on the road. But now it’s Eddie who feels like the outlaw, running from his own innocence, and he can’t find a shred of glamor in that.

“You’re thinking awfully loud over there, Munson.” Steve does it again, rests a hand on Eddie’s thigh as he drives one-handed, and Eddie feels that same glimmer of hope come alive again. 

Eddie shrugs and rests his head back against the seat, cracked pleather against his neck. 

“All good over here, big boy.”  They drive in silence save for Bon Jovi’s Wanted Dead or Alive and Eddie watches the sunset over the wide expanse of promising highway ahead of them.

[ronancexists]

Things I would like to see in Stranger Things 5:

- Since Robin has done quite a few doodles on her red converse, I like to think she's quite good at drawing, so that can be a way for her to start up a conversation with Will

- And then Will confides in Robin about being gay and being in love with Mike because he had a feeling that she was like him and Robin confirming she was indeed like him and becoming his gay mentor (like you don't understand I NEED ROBIN AND WILL TO HAVE A CONVO ABOUT BEING GAY)

- Will (finally!) tells the party that he's gay (and Byler becomes a thing) but not before Robin comes out to the party in order to make Will feel more comfortable and to show him that they will accept him because that's totally something she would do as his gay mentor

- More Steve and Robin being "Platonic with a Capital P" cause we didn't get enough in st4

- Hopper and Joyce trying to corral the kids and control the situation as best as they can

- Joyce being a mother figure to Robin like she is with the rest of the kids and Robin becoming better acquainted with El, Jonathan, and ESPECIALLY Will because she didn't really get a chance to get to know the California crew before they packed up and moved so ya

- El traveling into Vecna's/Henry's/One's mind in order to be able to wake Max up and free her from his control because he said his victims stay with him in his mind so like 👀

- Max wakes up after El successfully rescues her from Vecna/Henry/One but she is severely incapacitated, like she's probably blind in one or both eyes and is going to need assistance walking for the rest of her life and is going to be stuck in the hospital for a few more weeks (possibly months)

- How and when the Upside Down was created

- What Will's connection to Vecna/Henry/One and the Upside Down really entails and how that could affect both him and The Party during this final stretch

- Vecna/Henry/One, the Demogorgons, the Demodogs, the Demobats, the Mindflayer, and the Upside Down along with whatever other monsters are down there get destroyed once and for all because I don't think shutting the gates is gonna do it this time

- Kali comes back to help El defeat Vecna/Henry/One

- Murray tries to figure Steve and Robin out but he can't because he's never seen anything like the two of them and it frustrates him to no end

- Then when he tries to psychoanalyze Robin she does it right back to him because she's a freaking genius and everyone is in awe of her because they've never seen Murray speechless before

- KAREN WHEELER DESERVES TO KNOW THE TRUTH ABOUT EVERYTHING THAT'S BEEN GOING ON IN HAWKINS!!!!!!!!

- And I hate to say it but if Steve dies Robin dies too because despite the fact that she is my favorite character (close seconds are Nancy and Will) Steve is her platonic soulmate and they are codependent on one another and one just simply cannot survive without the other

- Like it would absolutely break my heart to have to see Robin try to live without her dingus of a best friend and to have to see Steve try to live without his wing woman of a bestie so if one dies both of them die

- Lucas defending Max's unconscious body with Erica from whatever creatures from the Upside Down want to try and take and/or kill her

- Mike and El break up because El realizes she needs to be her own person and because Mike is in love with Will

- Dustin is even more protective and stubborn about Steve heading into danger because of what happened to Eddie and he absolutely refuses to leave his side through the entire season

- RONANCE RONANCE RONANCE RONANCE (i know it's probably not gonna be canon but a girl can dream)

- Robin finally getting an onscreen kiss with her girlfriend or a girl she really likes (cough cough Nancy cough cough) (sorry Vickie but I feel like ur just too similar to Robin)

- And if Steve doesn't die (hopefully🤞) then please please please DO NOT have Steve and Nancy get back together after she breaks up with Jonathan when she finds out he lied to her about Emerson along with everything else that's been piling up between them

- Instead Nancy decides she's better off not being in a relationship (or better yet she gets together with Robin) and focuses on what she's absolutely sure she wants which is getting her journalism degree at Emerson (and Robin decides to go there too if they become a thing 😊)

- Because Nancy Wheeler is a smart, strong, fierce, badass, independent woman and she does not need to be kept in a cage by becoming a housewife who gives birth to SIX KIDS

- NANCY WHEELER DOES NOT WANT SIX KIDS

- I REPEAT, NANCY WHEELER DOES NOT WANT SIX KIDS

- Steve and Robin move in together and attend a community college together (Steve's either getting a teaching degree or a child psychology degree while Robin is doing something with linguistics) or they follow Nancy to Boston because Robin and Nancy are absolutely smitten with one another :)

- Meeting Steve and Robin's respective parents

Ok I think that's all for now 😅

[thisapplepielife]

All Across the Universe: Chapter One

Rating: Eventual E | CW: Temporary Character Death, Canon-Typical Violence | Tags: Post-Stranger Things 4 Vol. 2, Canon Divergence, Eddie Munson Lives, Time Travel Fix-It, Blundering Through History, Platonic Stobin, Revolving Door of Characters, Mixed Media

limitless undying love, which shines around me like a million suns, it calls me on and on across the universe, Across the Universe, The Beatles

1987

Steve is comfortable on his back, laying against the trunk of his car, looking up at the night sky, when he sees a shooting star rush across the vastness of space. It was right there in front of him a second ago, and then gone in the blink of an eye. 

Like it maybe never existed at all.

It was pretty, the few moments he got to spend looking at it, and he wishes Robin could have seen it.

Hell, he wishes Eddie could have seen it. 

The last thing Eddie saw was that awful, bat-infested, red sky of the Upside Down, and that’s a fucking shame. Steve quickly thinks: I wish we'd had more time. I wish you'd gotten a different ending, a different life. I wish I could have fixed this.��

But he can't fix this. They didn't have more time. And Eddie barely got to live at all. They came up with a plan on the fly, a little too unprepared, and Eddie didn’t come home at the end of the night. And as much as Steve hates it, regrets it. That can't be undone. 

Steve can never unsee Eddie's body on the ground, can never unsee Dustin crouched over him, protectively. Dustin tried. Steve tried. Nancy tried. Robin tried. Nothing they did was gonna change it. 

Eddie was just gone, and they couldn’t fix that.

They were too late.

And it can't be fixed that the gates started closing before they figured out a way to bring him back through. To bring his body home. It's a regret Steve lives with every damn day. You don't leave a man behind, and he did exactly that. Against his will, maybe, but it still happened on his watch and he feels like that's on him. 

Robin was screaming, pulling on him. Trying desperately to drag him along with her, trying to get him to let go of Eddie's body. He didn't want to give up, and he was barely hearing Robin, or Nancy, as they were both yelling at him to come on, right now. Nancy kept turning her head, screaming at him, as she helped walk a limping Dustin towards the trailer. Steve thinks that Robin may not have been able to get him to stop trying to lift Eddie, if they hadn’t used Dustin as the reason he had to go, had to move. Now.

Something was happening, and it felt like the beginning of an earthquake. Small tremors, rolling under their feet. Steve stood, barely able to keep his balance. Taking one last look at Eddie, in apology. In sorrow. 

In regret, for what would never be. For Eddie. For any of them. 

Eddie had cut the sheet, and now Dustin needed help getting back up and through the gate, and the girls couldn’t do it alone. So, Steve went. Followed them, helped. Found a step stool and pushed each of them up through the gate, and back into the real world. 

He'd turned, and looked towards the door, considering. 

And Robin had been standing there, above him, crying. Begging him to just come through. Hand stretched out, holding the remnants of tied together sheets for him to grab. He stepped down one rung on the ladder, and she had shrieked at the same time the ground buckled, groaning, as it got ready to give way, and he grabbed a hold of the sheet, and pulled himself through. 

They crawled out of the trailer in the real world, just as it started to split, getting devoured by the fiery earth below. 

And that was that. 

They had a war to fight, to win.

And they did.

Vecna is gone, but so is Eddie. 

And now the shooting star is long gone, too. 

Steve looks at the stars left behind, just like him. 

But maybe Eddie did see it, somewhere. Steve's learned that nothing is impossible. Not now. Things happen that can't be explained. Walls open in bedrooms and monsters crawl out. There can be tunnels underground, well-worn paths just for monsters to travel deep beneath your feet. 

And there can be a gate at the bottom of a lake that greedily sucks you under, and spits you back out into hell.

Weird shit happens in this world, that's just a fact.

So, there's no reason he couldn't believe that Eddie saw that shooting star, somewhere else, in space and time. 

But Steve doesn't believe that, not really, but for a brief moment he can pretend he does. He really wants to believe that somewhere, in some other universe, Eddie was looking up at the same night sky. One that wasn’t red, wasn’t bleeding with the color of devastation, of evil. One that was full of bright, beautiful stars. Full of potential. Of a life yet unlived, undreamed, with endless possibilities laid out before him.

Eddie was only twenty years old. He hadn't really lived life, not yet. Hadn't got the chance to see the world, to see that there are things beyond the narrow-minded confines of Hawkins, Indiana. 

Steve's twenty now, too. Almost twenty-one. His birthday came and went, with little fanfare. No longer a teenager. He's caught up to Eddie, and very soon, he'll surpass him. 

He swallows, trying to shove the emotion of that realization down.

It's been a hard year, harder than any of the others. 

Because Steve’s become fixated, canonizing this man he barely knew. Robin has tried, desperately, to get him to stop obsessing. To let the guilt subside. He doesn't know Eddie Munson. Not really. And now he never will. 

And that's a whole bunch of horseshit. 

He feels a strange pulling in his stomach, and before can even sit up, he pops out of existence. 

they tumble blindly, as they make their way across the universe Across the Universe, The Beatles

Continue reading on AO3.

[likecastle]

Ronance Femslash February - hurt/comfort

Today’s ficlet is for the anon who said, “I know this is super vague but for prompts, literally anything ronance hurt/comfort??“ I haven’t written a lot of hurt/comfort, so this was definitely a fun challenge. Thank you!

I’m accepting Ronance prompts all month for Femslash February. Anon asks are totally fine, and you’re welcome to send more than one prompt. Don’t be shy! Please, keep them coming! You can find previous prompts I’ve filled here.

Putting part of this behind a cut because it got long! Content warning for a non-life-threatening injury.

Robin has just enough time to regret that she and Nancy decided to split up before the stairs are collapsing under her.

She doesn’t go far—she’d almost reached the basement when the steps gave way—but even so she’s pitched straight down into the hollow space below the stairs, and she hears herself hit the ground more than she feels. For the first minute or so, it’s just numb, winded shock, and more bits of wood raining down on her from above.

She lies there, too stunned to move or even really breathe, and tries to remember what she knows about spinal injuries—which is not much, actually, beyond some vague awareness that you’re not supposed to move someone who’s hurt their back. She can’t just lie here, though. She’s got to get up, but she can’t really make her limbs work and that’s probably just the shock, she tells herself, but what if it’s not? She can’t just lie here, she can’t. What if a demodog comes sniffing around, or one of those things Vecna’s been sending out lately shows up? She really doesn’t think she can handle being torn limb from limb by some kind of hive-mind zombie wearing the face of Mrs. O’Donnell or her mailman or whatever. Worse yet, she’s pretty sure she wouldn’t be able to live with herself if one of those monsters hurt Nancy because Robin couldn’t keep her shit together.

By the time she’s got her breath back, it’s coming thin and high, right on the edge of panic, but she tries to hold it at bay. The numbness has ebbed into an overall sting of an impact, her whole body buzzing as her nerves try to sort out what’s happened. But she can push through this sort of pain, at least, and she manages to roll onto her side. It’s not actually that bad. Everything hurts, but more because all the signals her body is sending her are turned up to eleven right now. She can do this, she’s got to, because she can’t leave Nancy alone.

She gets onto her knees, and thinks she can probably manage to pull herself out of the hole she’s fallen into. She didn’t even fall that far, thank god. But the moment she gets her feet under her, her left ankle flares in screaming pain and she collapses again.

Robin lies there hoping she didn’t break a bone, because they don’t have the supplies right now to deal with a bad break, and she’ll never walk right again if they don’t set it properly, and, god, if the bone broke through the skin, she’s not even going to have to worry about sepsis setting in because she’ll die the minute she sees her own insides on the outsides, she just knows it.

“Keep it together,” she mutters to herself in a shaking voice. Nancy would never just lie here panicking. Nancy would probably splint her ankle and keep going like nothing was the matter. Nancy—

And that’s when it occurs to her that she can radio Nancy. She almost cries with relief—or maybe it’s pain from twisting around to tug her walkie-talkie from the side pocket of her backpack.

“Hey, uh, Straight Shooter?” she croaks into the radio. “This is Tumbleweed requesting assistance, over.”

A moment later, the walkie crackles to life and Robin’s breath catches in her throat. “Where are you? Over.”

“Basement, over.”

Nancy doesn’t answer, but a moment later Robin hears the screen door in the kitchen slam open, and Nancy’s booted feet running toward the door to the basement.

“Careful on the stairs,” Robin calls up. “They collapsed out from under me.”

“Shit,” Nancy breathes, and Robin laughs weakly. “OK, I’m coming down.”

Robin holds her breath as she listens to Nancy easing her way down the stairs. “Please don’t fall, please don’t fall,” she whispers under her breath. When Nancy reaches the last stable step and stands there peering down at her, Robin can’t resist saying, “Ta-da!” She even does little jazz hands to complete the effect.

Nancy doesn’t seem amused by her attempt to lighten the mood. In fact, she looks furious and a little wild—pissed at Robin, probably, for getting herself into this jam. “Are you hurt?”

“My ankle,” Robin reports, trying to keep her voice steady for Nancy’s sake, but she knows she’s not doing a very good job. “I think—when I fell—” She stops, because if she keeps talking, she’s going to start crying, and she definitely can’t handle that.

“OK,” Nancy says with a grim nod. “Hang on.” Slowly, gingerly, she lowers herself down into the empty space below the stairs. The wood groans under her weight, slight as she is, and Robin holds her breath until both of Nancy’s feet are firmly on the ground.

The next instant, Nancy is kneeling beside her, checking her over with careful hands, asking, “Does this hurt?” and “What about this?” and “Can you feel that?” When she gets to Robin’s ankle, she prods gently at her boot, and Robin can’t help the sob that rises up out of her.

Nancy clasps Robin’s hand, and the pressure of her cool fingers around Robin’s own is better reassurance than anything she could possibly say. Robin doesn’t want her to let go. “We have to get your boot off,” Nancy tells her. “It’s probably going to hurt.”

Robin nods, because what else can she do? Robin doesn’t want to watch as Nancy unlaces her boot, but some part of her can’t look away from the swift, efficient working of her fingers as she undoes the laces and eases the boot off Robin’s swollen foot.

After that, Robin has to stop paying attention to what’s going on below her kneecaps. She can’t watch, and it hurts too much to think about anything else, so she just kind of endures waves of pain in the dark behind her screwed-shut eyelids. It’s not until Nancy’s hand closes around her own again that she dares to open her eyes.

“Do I get to pick out a toy from the gumball machine, doc?” Robin asks, searching Nancy’s face for some sign of how bad it is.

“You’ll be fine,” Nancy says, cutting right through Robin’s nonsense, as usual. “Just a bad sprain, I think. I’m going to radio Steve and Dustin to come help get us out of here.”

Robin closes her eyes, this time more so Nancy won’t see the tears of relief that are already welling up. She must notice, though, because her fingers tighten around Robin’s hand again, which should help, but only makes the tears come faster. She doesn’t really listen to what Nancy’s saying into her walkie, or what reply Steve and Dustin make, just tries to keep her breathing even and not embarrass herself any further in front of Nancy.

“They’re on their way,” Nancy says. Then, after a pause, she adds, “You really scared me, you know.”

Robin laughs, scrubbing at her eyes with her free hand. “Sorry, next time I fall through some rotting floorboards, I’ll try not to be so dramatic about it.”

“No,” Nancy says sharply, irritation clear in her voice, but she stops herself. “What I mean is,” she continues more slowly, obviously making a deliberate effort to keep her voice gentle, “it really scared me, when I thought you were hurt, or—worse.”

“Yeah, well,” Robin says with another incredulous laugh, and she can feel the threat of hysteria simmering in her chest, if she can’t keep a lid on it. “Me, too.”

“Would you shut up?” Nancy snaps. Her grip on Robin’s hand goes tight, almost tight enough to surpass the overall ache of the rest of her body. “What I’m trying to say—if you’d just let me talk for five seconds—is that I sort of don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“. . . Oh.” Robin dares to glance up at Nancy just in time to catch her rolling her eyes. “Only sort of?”

Nancy visibly restrains herself from smacking Robin in the shoulder, her face scrunched up into this expression of impish annoyance that Robin finds unspeakably charming. “Totally, OK? Is that what you want to hear? I’d be completely, utterly lost without you, so don’t do this to me again, you absolute disaster!”

“Yeah,” Robin says softly, squeezing Robin’s hand back as hard as she can. “That’s exactly what I wanted to hear.”

[familyvideowithsteve]

façade, pt. four : the four chimes - steve harrington x fem!reader

This material may not be copied, reproduced, displayed, modified. This is my work, do not steal it, do not republish it.

summary: it’s killing vecna hours (and pining/jealousy time in and out of the upside down) and the beggining of a conclusion of steve’s complicated relationship with her

warnings:  STRICTLY 18+ MDI, she/her pronouns with no physical description, violence, blood, fire, vecna, the upside down and the monsters, self degrading thoughts, mental breakdowns, pining, not that detailed sexy times (bathtub fingering, cunnilingus, unprotected sex), steddie x reader confusion if you squint, overall just a lot pain and angst with a comfortable ending

word count: 16,5k

prompts: “anonymous asked : ‘promise me you’ll still be here when i wake up’ with steve harrington” & “ anonymous asked : 'if you cry, i’ll cry ─ and that won’t be fun for anyone.’ with eddie munson”

a/n :  updated version from june '23 / don't forget to tap that reblog button, it makes you look cool

façade, the sequel | series playlist

“Steve, she’s not waking up!,” she almost screamed in panic as she shook Nancy, holding her arms in her hands, her voice filled and her eyes widened in worry. She looked at Steve, in despair. 

  From Eddie’s living room in the Upside Down he stood under the gate, “We can’t leave her here, guys, hurry! We need some music quickly!” 

  They heard quick movements, Erica, Eddie and Robin yelling.  Steve looked down, and shared worried eyes with her, until he walked back to her, she moved away, her hands on her scalp, almost ripping her hair out in frustration. 

Steve got closer to Nancy, his fingers on her cheeks,  he was trying to stir her away from whatever this was. 

 “Nancy, c’mon come back to us, now!”

His hands moved from her cheeks from her shoulders, just like she had earlier, he tried to shake her, whispered her name so low only the three of them could hear.  In a minuscule moment she could see a single tear run down his cheek, his eyes met her rapidly as she put her hand on his shoulder. 

  “Eddie doesn’t have anything she listens to, I know it, trust me. We need to think of something else, quickly.”

 “Okay, what?” 

 Steve put himself at Nancy’s level, his eyes staring at her rolled back white eyes, repeating her name in a shaky voice as his hands frenetically shook her arms. 

She was pacing behind him, thinking, thinking and thinking, rubbing her eyes in frustration. 

  “Something’s wrong, it’s not like when Max was in there too,” Steve whispered softly, his body retreating back a bit, a frown on his face, he was opening his mouth to continue but Nancy suddenly came back to reality in a gasp, big frightened eyes. She was out of breath, and lost balance in Steve’s arms. 

  He whispered words of comfort as he laid her on the ground delicately.  She closed her eyes and caught her breath, while she was in the back, watching closely the two.. it seemed.. intimate, she frowned but brushed it off quickly, it wasn’t the time, nor the place. 

  Her frightened eyes and the stiffness of her body was concerning to her, what could she possibly have seen that could be so terrible ? What happened ? 

Nancy got up, she muttered something she didn’t get, and went for the rope, Steve helping her. 

  When she landed on the mattress, Steve let out a shaky breath of relief, and turned to her but she cut him off when he opened his mouth, “You go first, don’t fight me on this, please,” she whispered as she avoided his eyes. 

  He frowned, but obliged, he didn’t want to make a fuss, so he stepped towards the rope, and pulled himself up, grunting from the pain he felt from his bandaged sides, the scabs detaching in bits as he made an effort to pull his body up. 

  He landed on the mattress in a swift motion, a small wince stuck in his closed mouth. 

When it was clear she gripped the rope in her hands, and with a loud exhale she pulled herself up, and gosh did it hurt.   

  She hung onto the rope tightly, and pulled herself up, ignoring the pain, the soreness and aching of her muscles. She felt the gravity of the Upside Down pulling her down when she went through the gate. 

Hawkins' gravity was also pulling her down but she was upside down, in the middle of it she literally felt torn between the two places’ gravity. 

  Yeah, that shit could mess up with anyone's head. 

  She let go of the rope and let herself fall on the mattress.

"Shit," she muttered as she fell on her ass in a swift motion, "that's kinda fun," she said through a smile. 

  Eddie and Steve both got down, a smile on the metalhead's lips as their hands enrolled under her armpits, and pulled her towards them.

  "Thank you boys," she whispered as they let her detach herself from them once on her feet.

  Dustin hadn't fully realised it, but his former babysitter, from when he was around nine, was in Eddie's living room, with all of them, involved in the Upside Down business, except her, who, from his point of view, had come from nowhere. 

  "Nancy, are you okay?" she walked to her when she saw her livid face, clearly she was still in her trance, reliving her nightmare.

  "Yeah, I just–... I need a minute," Nancy whispered, a sympathetic smile appeared quickly on her lips, then it was replaced by a sombre frown. 

  "Hang on a minute, what are you doing here? Coming from there?" Dustin asked with a frown on his face, his pointer finger directed at her. 

  "Huh, it's–complicated. I got myself stuck in the Upside Down for three days, then found them and the rest is history." 

  "I'm sorry, what? How?" 

  "I went through one of the gates, on the way in Hawkins, um, where Fred was killed, and.. well, I found them when they got stranded too. It's a really long story Dustin and I'm afraid we may not have time for that right now." 

  He agreed, everyone chose not to note that they knew each other before, it wasn’t that important.  But, everyone did agree on leaving Eddie’s trailer for Max’s. 

  The silence was getting thick, uncomfortable, only Nance spoke, explaining what she saw in her trance per Steve’s request. 

  The destruction of Hawkins, the literal End of the World, the original gates destroying the earth to form four branches of the gate, big enough to let monsters pass through easily, everywhere in the city. Families torn apart, dead. Fire, pain, so much blood. 

  It almost gave her a new wave of nausea, all this chaos was like the Upside Down but multiplied. It was such a nightmare.   A terrible, dreadful nightmare. And while Nancy was determined to end it all and go back, Steve was protesting, Dustin was topping Nancy’s idea, to which, Robin added some more protests. 

  Soon enough the living room was full of four voices, she silently grew more tired of it, that was until she realised her word mattered, just like anyone else’s and she was on nobody’s side.

  “Excuse me, Nancy, but no. There’s no way. We barely made it alive. It’s suicide; we did not just survived to tempt Death once again. No. I survived there for three days. I got myself strangled, bitten off, hunted down and not to do it again. I haven’t add a proper shower, meal and sleep in almost four fucking days. So, marinate your idea, think it through, but we’re not doing that today.” 

  The teens’ faces had gone from all emotions while she talked, Dustin was the most surprised of the lot, he hadn’t expected his former babysitter to have this kind of temper, she was definitely a good addition to the group, he thought.

  “We all need some rest, and it’s the middle of the night, let’s shower, eat, sleep and tomorrow morning we’ll be in a better mindset to kill Vecna. Meanwhile, Max, is it?⎼  Can keep holding onto Kate Bush for one more night, what do you think?,” She said as she turned slightly towards the redhead, then Nancy, awaiting her response. 

  “You’re not wrong… it’s midnight, we can’t do anything,” she paused, thoughtful, until she gave in, “Okay, but we’re not leaving anyone alone.” 

  “How are we doing that? My car is at your place and your’s is nearing the forest to the lake! And whose house are we barging in?” Steve exclaimed, clearly not on board with the situation. 

  “Mine, my parents are never home, and my car’s not far; easy. I can drive again to get the second group,” she thought aloud, Nancy nodded, they both left with Dustin, Eddie and Erica towards her car through the woods behind the trailer park. Where Fred had gone. 

  Quickly they reached the car and she realised she lost the keys in the Upside Down, that is until Eddie showed one of his hidden talents, he picked the lock and jump-started the car, and they drove off to her parents’ house, that, once again Eddie had to pick the lock. She told them to make themselves at home, they would orient themselves pretty well around the house. 

  She drove back to the trailer park, it was so calm, so silent, she never would have guessed she would be dealing with interdimensional monsters and psionic powers, like, those things normally where in the books she read and the movies she watched; like Alien. 

  She arrived quicker than she realised, deep in her thoughts, she picked up Steve, who claimed shotgun, Robin, Max and Lucas. The drive back was so silent, but it wasn’t uncomfortable, they could hear Max's walkman playing Running Up That Hill by Kate Bush.

  Once she arrived at her house she opened the door to her living room, which was transformed into a giant sleepover party, blankets, cushions, pillows, sleeping bags, enough for all of them to sleep in the living room.

  She smiled at Dustin, Erica and Nancy who had organised the living room. 

She went to her room and her parents’, taking clothes to sleep in for everyone, she heard the shower running in the main bathroom, she also took enough towels for the fourth remaining.

  Downstairs, she handed clothes and towels to the young adults, and proposed to Nancy her own bathroom, she agreed without a word, thankful. 

The kids all took their turns changing in the restroom into sleeping clothes, while she tepped towards Steve,  “Can you help me make us something to eat?” 

  “I’m a terrible cook.” 

  “So am I, I’m just making sandwiches.”

  Leaving the living room together, they saw Eddie getting down the stairs, his damp black hair falling on his shoulders, Robin ran upstairs screaming in the process that she went into the bathroom. 

  They washed their hands and their arms thoroughly in the kitchen, until the water was clear, and gosh was it nasty to see the colour of the water and the soap. With cleaner hands they made the sandwiches, more than needed for the next morning too. 

  It was silent between the two, working alongside the other, their skin almost touching, never saying a word; Steve wanted to say something, anything, but he couldn’t think of anything, 

He watched her as she sliced the condiment and the meat, he just wanted to embrace her, feel her warmth around him, but he felt intimidated. Self-conscious. 

  When she turned her head around Steve had just stopped watching her, she felt sad, he had a desperate look on his face, slicing away the sandwiches in two. She softly exhaled, and kept herself busy on the task in front of her. 

  They handed each kid a plate and a water bottle, and soon enough Nancy and Robin were both coming downstairs, damp hair falling along their shoulders, they were given a plate and some water, and Steve and her walked upstairs silently . 

  He was about to close the door of the main bathroom when he felt resistance, her head appeared in the corner of the door, “Sorry, I just..⎼ I have some medical supplies in my parents’ bedroom, for your wounds, you want some help for that after you shower?” 

  “Um.. that would be great, yeah, thanks.” 

  “Okay, meet me in my bedroom when you’re done,” and she left without a last look, off to her own bathroom. 

  She didn’t waste a minute to get undressed, she felt so nasty, and looking at her body in the small mirror gave her the heebie-jeebies, all the dirt covered most of her bruises, small cuts, with dried blood. 

She kept the cloth around the wounds on her side, hoping that the water would help remove it without bleeding again. She heard through the vents that Steve had started the water and she forbade herself to think of him, naked, in that shower cubicle. 

  The hot water against her skin was a godsend, truly the best feeling ever, it ran down her face, along her body, it felt so soothing. She first started to wash her hair, getting rid of the dirt, the weird particles, the dried blood, she shampooed two times. 

  At her feet the water was almost black, the clearer it got with more soap and shampoo. She couldn’t believe the quantity of dirt she was covered with. 

She decided to get rid of the cloth when it felt heavy, soaking wet, and the scab underneath, soft. 

  She untied the knot of the makeshift bandage, and slowly peeled it off with some of the softened scab, she winced and let out a pained moan. She threw the bandage on the cold tiles, fresh blood running on her leg to the water. 

  She cut the water and stepped out, hurried to grab a gauze she had prepared to stop the bleeding, she took slow and steady breath as she put pressure on it, her eyes accidentally drifted to the mirror, and she looked at what her body now looked like. 

  She felt the bruises from the aching of their muscles, the soreness of her skin, small cuts almost everywhere, and the wound on her side, she was torn between pride and disgust. 

  Pride because she had survived alone, without any knowledge of the place, the creatures, and she made it, but she also felt disgust because her relationship with her body was complicated. 

  Trying to appreciate her reflection on the mirror was hard, some days were easy, some other days it was.. truly impossible.  And now seeing what the Upside Down had left on her.. it gave her more reasons to feel hatred to herself. She knew how contradictory she sounded.

  Her thoughts were abruptly stopped when she heard Steve’s water come to a stop, he had finished. 

The wound was no longer bleeding so she dried herself off, her hair was damp and she left it that way, having no motivation to do her hair routine. 

  She put on underwear, sweatpants, only her breasts were covered by a sports bra; she also had to bandage up her wound. 

  She left her bathroom and went to her dresser to look for a warm sweater, while the door knocked and Steve got in silently, his eyes on the ground and one hand covering a part of his eyes. She grabbed the piece of clothing close to her stomach, hiding everything, including the wound. 

  “You can look, I’m decent,” she giggled lightly at the young man, watching a small smile appear on his lips. 

  “Just wanted to make sure of it, do we go to your parents’ bedroom?” 

  “Yeah, all the medical supplies are there. My father decided to ‘be prepared incase of something weird happening’.. what happened to Barbara and the ‘fire’ sent him into a survival mode.. not that I’m complaining, it’s turning out to be pretty useful,” she said as she walked to the room. 

  She told him to sit on the bed, and lie down, while she looked for the hidden box of medical supplies in her parents’ closet. It had everything useful in case of emergency, and maybe a bit too much stuff for civilians, but he worked in pharmaceutics, he had some advantages. 

  She cleaned his wounds with physiological saline, removed some of the old scabs, disinfected it, wrapped them up in clean dressings and bandaged it all up across his waist, all in complete silence, or with gentle apologies whenever she hurt him.  Focus written on her face, he couldn’t stop staring at her, she was so precise and attentive. 

  “Where did you learn all of this?” he whispered softly, as he watched her work around his waist. 

  “I did tell you I was in Indianapolis for Community College, but what I left out is I’m in a paramedical course, I’m trying to enter the nursing course; I want to be a nurse.” 

  “I’m sure you’ll be a great nurse.” 

  “We’ll see.. let’s survive first, yeah?” She gave him a small smile, indicating to him to get up, “All done, you can go eat.” 

  He rose from the bed but stayed seated, his eyes on her wound on her side, “Let me help you.” 

  “I can do it, don’t worry.” 

  “I know you can. I want to help you,” he said as their eyes locked, he was so sincere, he meant what he said, and she was sure he still cared about her, he couldn’t be more gentle with her, waiting for her agreement, “just tell me what to do.” 

  “Okay,” she whispered, and approached her body towards him. She guided him step by step, wincing silently, ignoring the way his eyes drifted towards her face here and there, her hands would cling to his wrists sometimes when she winced in pain, stopping almost immediately as she realised. 

  Just like him, he had to remove some part of the old scab, which hurt, but he muttered soft apologies each time, soft apologetic eyes sent her way.. 

  Wound disinfected, wrapped up and bandaged; his fingertips tenderly longed on the bruises above her waist and the bandage, the pads of his fingers tickling her skin, goosebumps rising under his hand. 

  His eyes looked up to her, in the most delicate voice, he said, “I think we should talk.” 

  “We should..⎼ and we will, I promise you, once we come back from this insanity, we’ll talk things through..⎼ just..⎼ I want to eat and to sleep, I’m..⎼ I’m sorry it’s..⎼ I’ve spent four days in that hell and I just want to be…⎼ okay.” 

  “The promise we will talk things through is enough for me. You’re right, we should really eat and sleep, especially you.. c'mon, we have a murder to commit tomorrow,” She giggled at the joke, a tired smile on her lips. 

  He handed her her sweater, which she put on slowly, very conscious about the wound. He grabbed her hand, and they walked downstairs together hand in hand. 

  Getting comfortable in the camping mattress they had put on the floor she felt so relieved to eat something like it was out of a dream. 

  Dustin had asked more details about her walkabouts in the Upside Down, so she told them everything in detail but omitting the breakdowns, she felt.. weak to have been crying so much in there. She wasn’t strong enough for it. 

It made them all feel both sorry for her but impressed in her ability to survive there without any knowledge.

  Everyone was fast asleep, tangled in their blankets. She was deep in the arms of Morpheus, from his sleeping bag Steve watched her closely.

 Sincerely happy that she could rest peacefully, before their second take in the Upside Down, he swore to himself he wouldn't let anything happen to her, before he dozed off himself.

The windows were covered in mist, the room was so warm she almost felt her own body melting in the hot water.  The soft smell of the scented candles burning not far, the room was lit only by the candles, it created an amorous atmosphere. 

She could almost feel at peace, like she could sleep in his arms in this hot bath. 

That is until she felt one warm hand traveling on her stomach, a lingering pair of lips gently pecking at her neck. 

  Goosebumps rose on her skin as his fingertips were traveling further down her body, his other hand pressing more on her waist to hold her down against his nude body.

  It was the beginning of December, it was extremely cold outside, Steve's parents were, as usual, absent, and his house had a giant master bathroom. With a bathtub.

  Her train of thoughts were disrupted when his fingertips were drawing slow patterns on the most sensitive nubble of nerves in between her legs, his other hand moved from her waist to her low abdomen, hand flat, he put a slight pressure. 

  She had closed her eyes, her head tilted back on his shoulder, her lips halfway open to let out a breath. 

His lips had the pleasure of attacking her neck, and her shoulder. 

  His eyes never left her face, observing very closely her lips, the frown on her eyebrows disappearing to become one of relief.   Her hands gripped at his arms, her nails digging slowly as the pleasure was building up in a tight knot in her abdomen.

  Her left leg moved, almost blocking the way, his hand held her thigh from the inside and forcefully moved it a bit, widening her legs more for him,”You're not there yet, I know it,” his raspy voice murmured to her ear.

  It sent shivers to her core, breathing in deeply, when his hand pushed her thigh apart completely over his own leg, his hand meeting the soft nubble of nerves to pump a finger in her, slowly.

  Her breath quickened, her nails digging deeper in his arms. 

She was a quiet mess, and he wanted her so badly to be more loud but he didn't want to pressure her.

  The combination of his fingers –plural– pumping in her and the fingertips playing with her sent her to her own cloud nine.  His rhythm was so slow, it was excruciating, but oh so good. 

  Her head completely thrown back on his shoulder, she looked at him through orgasm-drunk eyes. Her lips swollen at her persistence to keep the moans quiet by biting her lip. 

  When the knot seemed to grow even more tighter, she felt it so close, that suddenly it was like an explosion in her lower abdomen.  Her body was in complete disharmony as she started shaking, breathless, her eyes and thighs closed shut, his hands surrounded her thigh and her waist as she rode her high, engulfed in Steve's neck. 

  Her hands were holding onto him tightly, her breath hitting his skin in an erratic pattern, he 

held her tighter, pecking here and there at her warm skin, until his lips met hers in a kiss, he couldn’t stop kissing her, he would never be able to stop, the touch of her lips gave him such a craving to have more of her. 

  She rose from her sleeping bag in a cold sweat, panting for breath, she felt her body getting hotter as the images lingered in her mind, embarrassed that she would think like this, dream like this.

Looking around her she saw everyone was still asleep, hidden in their warm blankets, Steve cuddled in his sleeping bag, his hair was a complete mess but she always loved to watch him sleep.

She walked to her kitchen and got herself a cup of water, staring at the sunrise through the window. 

  The contrast between life without the Upside Down and with it was new to her, like seeing the world in a new set of glass, the colours lost their shine, their life, it all felt like it was doomed, like they were set to lose before they even got to act on it. She went back to sleep, this time with no dreams.

Everyone had woken up after ten, and by the time they all had gotten ready and ate something, they had agreed on needing a bigger car for everyone to fit in.

  The young adults –Eddie was wearing a bandana to cover his mouth and sunglasses, were going to the trailer park to get Eddie's idea –which he wouldn't say what it was. And then they would get the kids back.

  Messy, but necessary, the situation wasn’t optimal but they did what they had to do. 

  Eddie kept on insisting on not telling his idea until the quintet found themselves in a stolen trailer driven by Steve. 

  "Seriously Munson, I hate you so much sometimes," she said, her eyes shooting up daggers in the metalhead direction seated in front of her, the brightest smile on his face at her.

  Rolling her eyes at him but with a joyful smile she got up to take the walkie talkie and warned the kids they were close.  When everyone was reunited in the caravan, Steve started driving off to the store, avoiding the roadways. 

  Everyone was pretty focused on the road, retreated in groups of two, talking here and there.

Her, on the other hand, was deep in her thoughts about the events that would soon take place.

  This Vecna guy had to know something was planning itself since he couldn't get Max, and he hadn't cursed another teen, he wanted her and he wasn't letting her go..  Not to forget Nancy's vision.

She had a really bad feeling about it.

  Only the young adults –minus Eddie– with Max were in War Zone, all members of the Hellfire Club couldn't get in in case Jason and his psychotic friends were there, and they quickly found out they were.

  Nancy was looking for two rifles and ammunition, Steve and Robin kerosene to make Molotov cocktails, Max and her were seeking out knives and nails to make spikes, and whatever clothes they could find to create some sort of protection.

  “You're the girl Steve was seeing last year, are you? Like, his ‘serious seeing girl’?”

  “His what?”

  “He was seeing someone last year, he never told us her name, only that it was serious and.. that he really loved her this time.., so I called her ‘serious seeing girl’, Dustin said it wasn't an original surname but it was you, wasn't it? I've seen how he was with you yesterday.. and how he looks at you.”

  “Um, yeah, we.. we weren't official but we definitely were something..”

  Max was putting different types of vests in the cart, now observing the knives, she pulled one out of its sheath, staring at the blade under the light, she looked at her reflection through the blade.

  “Why didn't it work? If..⎼ if you don't mind me asking." 

  As she thought of an answer, Max realised it grew quiet between the two, so she turned around, and realised she was deep in her thoughts before she looked back at her, “A lot of reasons. But all from love.. it's..⎼ yeah we were something but we're not anymore..⎼ but Max, don't give up on you and Lucas. I've seen the little smiles.” 

  The redhead smiled at her, she gently caressed her back in support, but turned towards the knives, “Let’s get the sharpest ones, shall we,” she murmured as she looked at the redhead, knife in hand. 

Her and Steve both felt a sense of urgency when they saw Nancy face to face with Jason, they both shared a look, she asked Max to join Steve as she stepped towards Jason, he had grabbed the aim of the rifle Nancy held in her hands, she had asked him two times to let go, he still hadn’t. 

  She crept up behind him, “She asked you to let go,” she muttered through her teeth, her hand holding tightly the handle of her knife against his back, taunting to pierce it through his skin. 

  He had been caught by surprise, his hand left the aim and Nancy took a step back, “That’s a good boy, Jason, now you better leave, and leave us the fuck alone, I see you around and I swear to God I’ll gladly shut you up for good.” 

  He turned around, frowned as he didn’t recognize who she was, she knew who he was, he didn’t, the privilege of being a nobody in highschool; he took a minute to stare at her, and she grew impatient, “Did I stutter?”  He was gone in minutes, under their death glare, his gun forgotten on the counter. 

  She grabbed another knife, and they all went to checkout, dividing the cost between them, they cautiously left towards the trailer, hidden behind an alley, and Steve drove them to an unoccupied field by the forest on the way to Hawkins. 

  Everyone got in groups and got busy, Dustin and Eddie were making their shields spiked in nails for the bats, Erica and Lucas made the spears, Steve and Robin the Molotov cocktails, and Nancy, Max and her were arranging the rifles, sawing off the aim. 

  She had stayed silent since the store, Nancy’s presence next to her had made her realise that she went through a lot without even realising it, she had completely shut herself off when Barbara disappeared and Nancy was so strange to her then, now she knew, and she felt so bad for all of it. 

  Nancy had finished sawing off her rifle when she handed the tool to her, sensing something was wrong by the look on her face, Nancy whispered her name, catching her attention, “You’re okay?” 

  She derailed from her train of thoughts and looked at Nancy, “Yeah, uh..⎼ it’s..⎼ I should have been there from the beginning. I knew Barb too, she was a friend, you were too, I..⎼ I gave up on you so easily and you were fighting this off, I..⎼ I’m so sorry Nancy.” 

  “I was never mad at you for it, you know, it made it easier, actually, I couldn’t bear lying to everyone who wasn’t involved..⎼ Shutting yourself off from it..⎼ it guaranteed your safety and it was an explanation or a lie I didn’t have to do. I preferred it that way… I still missed you though." 

  She let out a shaky giggle out of nervousness, teary eyed as she stepped closer to Nancy, "I'm by your side now, I'm with you." 

  "You are. And I couldn't hope for a better fighter by my side," Nancy made the final step to embrace her old friend in her arms.

  Max felt a bit out of place, until the two detangled themselves from one another, she offered a gentle smile to the redhead, and took Nancy's place, Max held her gun in place.

  They talked lightly while Steve had his eyes on everyone, concerned, seeing Nancy and she had reconciled made him hope they would to, even if they were on speaking terms again, thanks to the Upside Down, and the promise they held to talk he still felt completely unsure of their future. 

  Hers’ and himself but his worry extended to everyone else, he began to feel sad and despair, he couldn’t save everyone and he didn't want anyone to be hurt, or dead, they had already gone through enough, but this time it all felt so serious, so deadly, more grave than before. 

  Robin was on the exact same wavelengths, just by looking at his face she could tell he was worried, concerned, that he had this horrible feeling in his chest that they would lose and that they couldn’t do shit about it.

   “We still have to try, don’t we?” she asked in a low voice, her hand automatically stopped pouring the kerosene in the bottles, Steve turned to her voice. 

  “Even if we have this gnawing feeling, we have to, who’s going to anyway?” 

  “Even if we don’t come out alive.. so.. to killing Vecna?” She asked her bottle in the air, Steve quickly got rid of the can of kerosene to grab a bottle, and cheered his bottle with her’s. 

  “Slash One.” 

  “Slash Henry.”

  Their bottles clinked at the same time she had finished sawing off the aim of her rifle, blowing out the excess dust she turned to Max when she heard her voice, “Is that a felony?” 

She first looked at the redhead then her eyes met Nancy’s, “It probably is, but, we have an excellent excuse : we have a son of a bitch to kill.” 

Everyone was equipped, dressed for the Upside Down or their task in the Creel house.  The plan was set on three teams.

   Max, Erica and Lucas would be in the house, waiting to bait Vecna, using Max, which none of them were happy with, but they didn't have any other choice.

  Dustin and Eddie were to distract the bats to clear the house so that Nancy, Robin, her and Steve could get in without danger and do their best at killing Vecna.

  They all went through the phases of the plan multiple times, mostly to reassure Nancy, until they drove to the house and let Max, Erica and Lucas go.

But not without a weapon.

  She had given them the extra knives she had picked from the store, handed them both to Lucas and Max, 

“I think everyone can agree with me on this. You’re the bait Max, but you still need to be able to defend yourselves. Use it.” 

  The pair looked at each other then at her, then at Steve behind her, nodding, “It’s just a precaution, but she’s right.” 

  “Yeah, Jason and his friends are a threat, a very possible one, who knows, they could come around here, or not, just, don’t be afraid to stab someone, it’s okay. Do you have a walkie, for when we’re done?” Nancy then added, appearing behind her. 

  They didn’t have one so Nancy gave them one, made sure the frequency was the right one and that they had enough battery, “Be safe,” she said as she handed them the walkie. 

  “You too,” Lucas responded as he took the walkie, he felt the weight on his shoulder and his chest heavier under the responsibility. Max and him felt the seriousness of the situation way too much, its graveness.. they wished they could live normal teenage lives, without the weight of saving the world on their chests. 

  But it’s a feeling they all could feel, and no matter what they could say, nothing would make it better because they couldn’t say anything, even the newcomers in the band, Eddie and her, could feel that shift in their lives. 

  With a timid smile Max closed the door of the trailer and watched them leave. Even with Lucas and Erica by her side, she felt incredibly alone in front of the house, she felt so small, intimated in front of it. 

  Breathing in, she stepped towards the front door, Lucas shared a glance with his sister, uneasy, but followed her closely. He felt like they were walking on a trap and he hated it. 

  He hated so much that he couldn’t take her place, he could only sit and watch, he hated that he was on the bench. He felt useless, and so lost. 

  He knew he couldn’t afford to think like that, not when Max was baiting Vecna, Eddie and Dustin were also baiting the bats, and four young adults were risking it all to kill Vecna, nothing could appease him. 

He had to wait and see. Watch out for the right to pull her out of Vecna’s touch.

The Upside Down team arrived not far from where Fred had been taken, not far from the trailer park, they hid the trailer in the woods, and walked in the darkness towards Eddie’s trailer. 

  Steve went through the gate first, everyone passed through with the equipment, she preferred to ignore the weird, longing looks between Nancy and Steve when she went through. 

   Stepping outside of the trailer in the Upside Down they felt the thick atmosphere, the particles floating around them. 

As the suicide squad –Eddie's surname to the group, obviously– was walking towards the woods Steve abruptly stopped and walked back to Eddie and Dustin.

  It was inaudible until the girls got closer, they heard the end of their conversation, Eddie was telling Steve to make Vecna pay, then his eyes fell on Nancy and her, side by side.

  “Ladies, may my kindest regards flow through your deadly bullets," Eddie exclaimed through his theatrical voice, an hesitant smile on his lips. 

  "May the most metal concert ever be the best one yet in an alternate dimension," she responded with a smile and they separated their ways.

  Dustin and Eddie began to turn the trailer into a fortress, together they carried his amplifier to the roof, his guitar resting in its original place, like she stood on a podium. 

  They were prepared for the most metal concert ever. 

The suicide squad group –the surname was growing on them– was wandering through the woods, carefully avoiding the vines, flashlights in hands in a line, Robin first, then Nancy, Steve and to close the walk, her demotivated walk.

  It was all silent, only their footsteps marching on the leaves were heard, Robin kept looking around her anxiously while Steve and Nancy were looking in front of them, she preferred to ignore any nearby sounds.

  Getting back in the Upside Down made her hypervigilant, she held onto hope that a creature wouldn't find them, she didn't want to relive her misadventures with the bats. 

  It made her extremely paranoid, and jumpy, suddenly everyone stopped walking, Robin shared her thought that they were lost and immediately it made her  on edge.

  Even if Steve and Nancy told her they couldn't be, she went off running, completely unwary of the vines. 

They continued walking, and she realised the red thunderbolts were flashing in the sky a lot more than when she was there alone the first time.

  She stopped walking abruptly when a red thunderbolt struck through the sky, the shadow of the enormous monster revealed in the red light.

  She gasped silently, her flashlight dropping to the floor as the head turned to their direction, it was all shadow, but she felt a goosebump travelling her body. Paralyzed on her spot.

  It took her a few minutes, and leaves cracking to zone her out of her trance. She kneeled down to grab her flashlight, getting up she stumbled upon another unpleasant sight.

  Steve and Nancy were standing face to face, a longing-ish set of eyes looking at Nancy, a thin but true smile on his lips. A smile she knew so much, so contagious it used to make her grin.

  It got her frowning, she didn't want to fall under any fast conclusions but it was so easy and it made her blood boil of jealousy and anger, and how could she be so stupid, thinking that he wanted to talk to arrange things between them? So that they officially could be a couple? 

  The heart eyes she saw in Steve’s eyes were enough to make her hold back on that promise, she wouldn’t let herself be used a third time, and not to Steve fucking Harrington. 

  She saw Robin running back to them, she started walking beside the pair now opening the walk, her fist held onto her flashlight so tightly, tensed. Just by the way she stomped on the ground they could sense a major mood shift.  

  They quickly arrived by the house and hid in the small playground in front of it, where some red particles looking thing floated, Erica was there. They signalled their arrival, and she warned Lucas to begin Max’s bait. 

  They waited Erica's signal on Eddie and Dustin's distraction, in the distance they could hear Eddie’s amplifier playing the first notes, and she recognized Metallica’s newest “Master of Puppets”, she smiled a bit, remembering she had spent some time with the metalhead as he attempted to play it. 

  Except for the sex friends thing, they loved to hang out and hearing him play the guitar was always a delightful sight, “Most metal ever,” she whispered under her breath, it almost brought some more calm in her, hearing the song. 

  In reality she didn’t know if it was Eddie or the stress setting in, but when they started heading towards the house her anger subsided, mostly trying to concentrate on the incoming task, praying internally that she wouldn’t miss the target on him, she was new at this. 

  When Steve opened the door, the sight of the vines crawling absolutely everywhere got her out of her anxious spiral, and on to another one, they barely had any space to walk, they would have to play fucking Twister in the Upside Down! 

  “This is the fucking worst, are you kidding me,” she muttered quietly, her eyes widened. 

  “I second that, remember when I said I have poor movement coordination skills. This definitely applies,” Robin nervously added in a whisper. 

  “It’s gonna be okay, just, pay attention and don’t rush, you’re gonna do great,” Nancy murmured back as she turned to look at Robin and her.

  Steve went first, hopping on uncovered vine spots on the ground, Robin followed, then the two remaining, the sight was maddening, they looked like acrobats on a queue.

  They reached the stairs, still tip-toeing in any possible corner they could set foot onto, cautious as to where they put their hands on the handrail, also covered in crawling vines. 

  Finally reaching the top Steve handed their rifles, he took out his axe and immediately after they were going to step towards the attic’s door the earth started to shake, the four of them tried so hard to hold onto each other to not fall and let their presence be known. 

  It failed because as soon as the earthquake stopped a vine crawled around Robin’s ankle, she flew to the wall, her arms already attached so she wouldn’t move, she tried to speak but her throat was already wrapped in a vine. 

  They rushed to her side and tried to rid her of the vines, but it all happened so quickly, the three of them were also gripped by vines, tied to the walls, already suffocating, their weapons on the ground. 

  They were in an urgent need of oxygen, their hearts beating crazily in their ribcage. 

There was nothing they could do.

Absolutely nothing.

  Her eyes were looking at her gun on the ground completely out of her reach, she closed her eyes in frustration and despair.

  She knew it, she knew they wouldn't succeed and that it was all a giant mistake. 

The more they tried to move their arms and legs, the more the vine tightened up around their throat.

  She didn't realise a tear escaped her eye at their upcoming deaths, her eyes fell upon Steve's features, and she hated that it would end like this. 

  She wished so much she hadn't taken her car that day, that she hadn't stopped her car next to a gate, and got caught up in all of this.

  Her vision started to get blurry and the edges darkened, she was starting to lose some sense of reality, she felt herself leave slowly because they weren't killing them yet. 

  They were suffocating but they still had one ounce of air in their lungs, gasping for more.

It felt like hours went when in reality it was minutes.

  And suddenly, out of nowhere, they felt the vines loosening their hold on them, completely dropping them on the ground, gasping loudly, desperately trying to get more air.

  They coughed, they could hear a whistle through their vocal cords but they didn't give up, they rose on their feet, grabbing their guns on the way.

  Steve briefly looked at her, her red eyes, the bruise around her throat was even more prominent, it hurt her throat to talk so she stayed quiet and charged the gun in sync with Nancy. 

  “C'mon,” whispered the latter, rifle in hands, determined to make it all end once for all.

She opened the door to the attic, and without a sound they all stepped inside.

  Vecna laid there, above the ground, vines seemingly attached to his back. He seemed to be in some trance, just like Dustin had said.

  The skin looked burned by the fire and putrefaction. His features were undistinguishable, only the inhuman traits were left out. He looked like he was made out of a nightmare himself, which could probably be true.

  It caused fear, a paralysing sort of terror, goosebumps rising along their skin. Nancy and her shared a look, raising their guns to make the bottom rest against their chest to have a comfortable aim. 

  They walked silently each on a side, Nancy on Robin's and her on Steve's, giving them enough space to throw the Molotov cocktails but still would be able to walk towards Vecna when they would fire.

  Meanwhile Robin put out her backpack on the ground, her and Steve both took a bottle, he shared a look with them, awaiting any reactions.   In the anxious silence Steve lit up his bottle and threw it at him, aiming perfectly as they had to make a step back from the fire exploding on Vecna.

  The vines attached to his back burned, retreated back from his body like they felt the pain, hive mind. 

Vecna’s eyes opened and the image of his face was burning in the back of her mind, his whole existence was the beginning of a very horrific nightmare. 

  He stepped forward, engulfed in fire, but it didn’t faze him, on the contrary he was determined and enraged to stop them. Robin threw another inflamed bottle at him, he screamed in rage, stepping forward. 

  In sync, they both started their guns, firing at the same time, the bullets made him retreat, the impact hit at full force, they also felt the fire back on their chests but they continued. 

The eyes they met in front of them were full of hatred, rage, starving for vengeance and violence.

  They stepped closer, and with each step they fired, completely in the moment, even forgetting the presence of each other, only Vecna mattered, he was in front of them and he didn’t have any time to do anything because they kept shooting at him. 

  With the fire back of the gun he was propelled through the window, and out into the front of the house, still in flames. 

They looked at eachother then at Robin and Steve, they rushed to the front porch, where his body was nowhere to be found, a frown appeared on their faces as they took a step forward.  

  The ground appeared to have some burning spot, as well as the shadow of his burning body on the ground, “You think he’s dead?” Robin murmured, her voice broke the silence and made the girls jump in surprise. 

  “He’s gotta be, right? You two were mercilessly shooting at him, he has to be dead.” 

  “But why is his body not there?” Nancy retorted at Steve, like everyone was so confused but it’s not like they could look around, their charger was empty and they only had one Molotov cocktail left, so the fight would be unfair. 

  “We’re not gonna look around for him, are we? We don’t have any bullets left and that creature in the sky gives me the heebie-jeebies,” she whispered as she pointed at it, it hadn’t gone closer, but it seemed like it was observing them, watching their every move from afar.

  They followed what her finger pointed at and she saw Nancy’s face turn livid, like she knew what it was, “Nancy, what is that?”

  “It’s the Mind Flayer, right?” Steve murmured as he turned to Nancy, and she nodded, “Do you also have the feeling that it’s looking at us?,” he continued as he looked back at it, the four of them were completely in a trance for a couple seconds, until Nancy turned around. 

  “C’mon, let’s go back to Eddie’s trailer. The quicker we leave, the better, the way he’s not moving but kind of looking at us makes me uncomfortable, like there’s something happening.” 

  The quartet left and walked their way back through the woods, while they hoped that everything had gone to plan, they were also very conscious that it probably hadn’t, one thing was sure, Max hadn’t died, because if she did the four gates would have opened an enormous one through the town. 

  They also were unsure of Vecna’s fate, if he really was dead or not, and something in the way the Mind Flayer was observing them made them thought he wasn’t dead, he had escaped, and the second round would be more difficult, harder than the first round, deadlier, scarier and they really didn’t looked forward to that. 

  Lost in their thoughts, facing the morbid silence of the Upside Down they arrived quicker than they thought and immediately reality caught up with them, Dustin was on his knees on the ground, weeping, his face turned to them at the sounds of footsteps. 

  Their feet moved on their own and when she realised Eddie was in Dustin’s arms, eyes opened, but not blinking, she realised he was dead, and she rushed towards them, “What happened?” 

  “We..⎼ we were surrounded by bats and when we ran to leave he cut the rope when he was on his way in, he left, said he would get you some more time.., I..⎼ I don’t know what to do, he just.. he stopped breathing when I heard you come in.” Dustin talked in sobs, his hands shaking holding Eddie’s side, his chest moving in waves as he cried more. 

  She got on the floor, and quickly asked Dustin to help her, he let go of Eddie’s side, he listened to her instructions carefully, freed his airways as she started to do CPR on him.

  The heel of her hand on his sternum began a rhythm of one heartbeat per one to two seconds, counting under her breath until she reached thirty and she breathed two times in his mouth. 

  Nancy got next to her, telling her she could take her place when she needed, mentally counting she asked Nancy to apply pressure on some wounds that could contribute to making him lose more blood than needed while she worked on performing a cardiac massage on him. 

  Steve and Robin were completely frozen in place as they observed the scene before their eyes, there was nothing they could do except keep their distance and remain quiet, and it seemed like hours went on when really it didn’t, she had done CPR on him for approximately five to seven minutes when Eddie took a breathe in, his eyes blinked. 

  Everyone gasped in shock, “Are you okay, how are you feeling?,” she asked, his face turned to her and she tried to take away his blood on her mouth from mouth-to-mouth, smudged it all across her lips and cheeks. 

  “Like somebody who played Monster of Puppets for a really ungrateful crowd,” he replied, his voice breaking at the end.

  She laughed a bit and smiled, he still had his sense of humour, that was a good sign, but she was also conscious that they had to move him fast, she really didn’t want to do CPR on him again. 

She rapidly explained to everyone what her idea was, and they all agreed, so they started moving. 

  Dustin was leaving with Robin and Nancy through the gate in Eddie’s trailer while Steve and she carried Eddie through the short part of the forest to get to the gate on the road. It would be easier to get him to Hawkins that way as they wouldn’t have to pull him, it would be impossible. 

  Nancy, Robin and Dustin would get the caravan, get Eddie, Steve and her, then get Max, Erica and Lucas to her house. Obviously Eddie couldn’t go to a hospital, and if she was correct, she had everything to help him, his wounds were extremely similar to Steve’s and her’. 

  The gate on the road was closer than they had expected, making sure no creatures were around. They carried Eddie to the ground, she made sure he stayed conscious by getting him to talk. 

Through the gate they heard the caravan. 

  She went first, her legs dangling through the other side she crawled on the ground and lied upside down in the gate, grabbing under Eddie's armpits to get him through, stopping mid way to actually sit on the ground and pull Eddie against her.

  Steve quickly followed and together they put him in the van on the banquette in the back, Dustin remained at his side kept him awake while he explained what happened to Max as he heard Erica yell code red when they got back in Eddie’s trailer, remaking a rope with some sheet. 

  Nancy drove them to the Creel’s house quickly, where they found Erica almost running to the middle of the road. She looked frightened, but relieved that they were there.

  Erica explained what happened, how Lucas had used the knives to make Jason leave, pretending to be in a psychotic sort of episode, using that to his advantage but it got him to miss the cues on Max’s trance. Fortunately, their attack on Vecna and Eleven’s assault in her mind slowed down so only her legs were broken. 

  Final point was that they needed to get Max to the hospital. Her legs were completely broken, she was alive but in severe pain.  

  They had to think quickly, there were no nearby phones and they couldn't just abandon them and leave unsupervised for an unknown matter of time. 

  Carrying Max was impossible because of the pain and the severely broken legs. They had to transport her differently, and that's when she remembered. 

  Her car was in Eddie's trailer park, which was twenty minutes away from the Creel house on foot.  Looking for the spare car keys in the trailer she handed them to Steve.

  “Near Eddie's trailer park, find my car, come back. You can pull down the backseats for more space, you'll take Max and Dustin to the hospital okay?” He nodded and sprinted off.

  With the help of Dustin and Nancy they made a makeshift stretcher using sheets and broomsticks they hunted down. The sheet was tied tightly around the handle of the broomsticks, and boom, they had a stretcher.

  Getting back in the attic they put the stretcher next to her, “Okay, Max, it's going to be super painful, but Lucas and I will hold your legs, Robin and Nancy will support your upper body. We'll get you to the hospital okay?”

  She cried more in pain and nodded, on three they all supported her body to sit her on the stretcher, she helped using her arms, and slowly they got her down the stairs and into the living room, waiting for Steve.  

  He arrived quickly, he had sprinted through the forest, glad he was still athletic. 

  Putting down the seats in the back they carried Max on her stretcher and transported her to the car, Lucas and Dustin sat next to her, and Erica was sitting on the front seat, next to Steve, he paused in front of the trailer and turned to her

  “Is the walkie gonna work all the way to the hospital? I gotta tell you all about what the doctors say.” 

  They turned to Dustin, who had turned the window down when he saw them talk, “I don’t know, the hospital is pretty far..”

  “You still have my house number, right?” 

  “Yeah, yeah I know it. I’ll call you there, I’ll let you know what's going on, and when we're able, we’ll go back to your house.”

  The two vehicles left at the same time and parted ways quickly, arriving by her house, Nancy and her carried Eddie inside as Robin opened the doors.

  She preferred on transporting Eddie upstairs, in her room, the mattress was comfortable for them and Eddie, they laid him down on her bed. He could easily be hidden upstairs.

  She asked Nancy and Robin to get rid of the clothes on him and keep him awake. While she ran to her parents’ room to get the medical supplies, she thoroughly washed her hands in her bathroom.

  Eddie was awake but felt weakier, she could see the gravity of his wounds, he was bitten on both his thighs, on each side of his abdomen, around his shoulder and around his throat. Some of his injuries were only superficial, but others were… worrying her. 

  Especially his thighs and his left side, Nancy had done her best to compress the skin to stop the bleeding, but as soon as she took out the cloth, it started again. 

  She used unused sponges and bandages to stop the bleeding on his thighs, and applied pressure on his left side. 

  Her mind and body was working in an automatic mode, having done a few days in first aid, she knew what to do, up to a certain point of course. 

  Robin's voice broke her out of her focus, “Shouldn't we get him to a hospital, this seems pretty serious and we're not qualified, we need a doctor, or a nurse, I don't know, but this–” 

  “Robin, I can handle it. Look around the kitchen for bowls, fill them with water. In the main bathroom you'll find washcloths, towels and gentle soap, please get those,” She interrupted, her hands tightly holding onto his side, feeling the thickness of the blood on her fingertips.

  Robin stayed static for a couple more seconds, with Nancy's eyes on her she rushed to the kitchen, they could hear the sounds coming from the next room.

  When Robin came back with what she needed, she asked Nancy to take her place on his side, to keep the pressure as strong as she could.

  She worked first around his throat, the wound was superficial, the bleeding had stopped on its own, she cleaned it up, applied a tulle gras to speed up the recovery, covered it up in a dressing. 

  She moved towards his right side, and as she took another bowl to clean the wound, she could see Robin pacing in the room, murmuring things that none of them could hear.

  She watched her pacing up and down, her hands intertwined in her hair, it added stress to see her so agitated. 

  “Robin, can you stop, please? I understand it makes you uncomfortable, and anxious but getting him to the hospital is not possible, there's a literal witch-hunt for him. I've managed to bring him back, I'm not sending him away to get killed by a bunch of maniacs who take the Second Amendment way too seriously,” She calmly told her, but continued, “Can you help us please?”

  Robin was.. shocked, stunned actually, but her eyes were pleading, she radiated calmness and anticipation, like she answered well to stress, anxiety around her, like it fueled her in a moment like this. 

And in all honesty, Robin couldn't be more wrong.

  Robin stepped closer and asked what she could do, to which she responded she could lift his legs up, to facilitate his blood circulation back to his heart.

  Instead of being silent and nourishing Robin's anxiety, she explained everything she did, all the steps she did, what she used, under Nancy's curious eyes.

  The bleeding had stopped on Eddie's thighs, the process was the same for them, but she finished with his side left, she took Nancy's turn on applying pressure, talking a little bit with Eddie to maintain his consciousness.

  Nancy had gone to empty a bowl and give her a new one, she slowly got rid of the bloody sponge, the bleeding had diminished, only the smaller vessels were bleeding out, which was something she could work with.

  She let out a breath, a bit loudly, her hands wiped her forehead in frustration, one glance at Eddie, to see his eyes blinking, looking at his chest, she saw the very slow rise of his breaths.

  She observed the bleeding slowly, thinking of what to do,  and as she took the bowl to clean the wound, she turned to Nancy in front of her, “Nancy, I'm gonna need some hemostatic gauze or dressings, can you look for those, please?”

  She was already gone looking in the bin, while she applied pressure with her bare hands, she had used all of the gauze with Steve, herself, Eddie. She hoped Nancy would find what she needed because she didn't know what she would do without it.

  She started to feel the adrenaline had run off, it's like her entire body was working in autopilot in the emergency but it started fading. She sensed she reached her limit, but preferred to hide it away, hide behind a façade.

  Nancy's small scream of joy when she found it broke her out of her trance, she thanked her, and got to work, cleaned the wound, dried the skin around and applied quickly the hemostatic gauze as it bled through his side and covered with a larger dressing. 

  She looked at Eddie, who turned his head towards her, and smiled, the wrinkles by his eyes, the shine in those whiskey brown eyes, it was more than enough to make her smile too.

  “How are you feeling?” 

  “Tired, so tired, I'm– I feel cold." 

  She told Robin to put pillows behind his legs and together they pulled the blankets on him, she told him he could rest, she would check on him periodically.

  They headed downstairs, with everything they had used, threw some in the garbage and put the washcloths, towels and everything else in the washing machine. 

  It's only then she realised her hands, wrists and forearms were bloody, she felt stuck on her feet watching the blood, like her brain was stuck processing it.

  It's Nancy's hand on her shoulder that surprised her, jumping and gasping as she turned around, “How do you feel?” 

  She looked at Nancy first, then at her hands, her nose had picked up on the iron-y smell, the thickness of it slimming on her fingertips, “I don't know.” 

  Nancy's hands fell on her arms, she turned her gently so she was facing her, “Sit down for a bit, I'll tell Robin she can take a shower, I'll make us something to eat.”

  “I'm not hungry, I'm– Take a shower too, we'll eat after.” 

  She frowned, but her eyes never faltered from her, “Are you sure?”

  She nodded slowly, didn't hesitate to wait for Nancy's approval to leave towards the front door to take the walkie in the trailer.

  She waited, hearing the two shower heads to activate it and call for Steve, in the darkness and coldness of the living room, “Steve?” 

  Nothing but the night surrounding her, the quietness, the dark, anxious thoughts. 

  “Steve?” her voice broke in the talkie, hoping so much she would hear him, she awaited his voice, its raspiness, but she only received the buzzing of the device. Maybe it didn’t reach the hospital.

  She exhaled, grabbed the walkie and walked upstairs. She sat down on a chair near the end of her bed, watching Eddie sleep, she could see the small movements of his breathing rhythm.

  She could only hear the droplets of water falling in the bathrooms, absorbed by the darkness of the night, she was lost in her thoughts, the events of the night playing in the back of her mind, thinking of what ifs. 

  She didn’t realise how much time she spent lost in her thoughts, Nancy’s hand on her shoulder broke the chain of thoughts, jumping in surprise. Thanking the brunette when she told she could shower, too. 

  She looked for comfortable and warm clothes, and before she vanished in the main bathroom, voluntarily choosing not to shower in her bathroom, directly linked to her bedroom, she turned to Nancy and told her to make herself at home. 

  With the door locked she turned the water, undressed herself, her eyes avoiding the mirror as she undid the dressing around her side. 

She looked at the wound, then at its reflection, at the curves around her hips, she felt the soreness of her muscles and her skin, the purple and red tones of the bruises almost covered her body. 

  She ignored her naked body, her eyes deviating around her features, but she couldn’t ignore her hands, arms, and her face. Dried blood on her forehead, cheeks, lips, chin, her hands, wrists and forearms covered in Eddie’s dry blood.

  What she felt made it so complicated for her to comprehend what went through her head, the violence of the previous days was crawling its way in the back of her mind and she didn’t know who she was anymore, she felt uncomfortable in her skin and in her head. 

  Hatred, towards herself, that she let herself be involved in this by stepping by that gate, that they couldn’t kill Vecna, that she let herself be so vulnerable in the Upside Down, the breakdowns, she felt shame. Nothing mattered anymore, everything prior to the events down there, it didn’t matter, the jealousy, sleeping around pretending to feel no insecurity and in control. 

  She stopped looking at her reflection, instead she took a midsize towel and put it around the mirror, stuck by clothespins. 

In the shower she scrubbed ardently for the blood to be washed away, down the drain, she stayed a few extra minutes under the water, letting the droplets of water run down her body. 

  She let herself slide down the shower door, the water hitting her body as she rested in complete silence, numb, like the water would help her forget the previous night. 

  When the tears stopped and she felt calmer she turned the water down, and dried herself off, dressing in warm, comfortable clothes, she walked towards her room, put the dirty clothes in the laundry basket. 

Eddie was asleep, deep breaths levelled up his abdomen. 

  Silently she looked for a dressing and a bandage in the box of medical supplies, she went to her bathroom, turned on the light, she covered the top of the mirror, she hid her face’s reflection, avoiding her eyes’s reflection looking at her.

  Using the small available space she covered her wound with a tulle gras, a dressing and bandaged her abdomen. All under Eddie’s discrete eyes, he wasn’t that deep asleep after all.

  She exhaled and let the towel fall on the mirror’s length, Eddie closed his eyes and heard her turn the lights off, walking back to the room. 

She walked downstairs, where she met Nancy and Robin, they had prepared things to eat for everyone when the rest of the group would get back from the hospital. With a tired thank you she took two plates along with two water bottles and left towards the stairs, she stopped and turned to the girls.

  “Sleep where you want, yeah? I’ll stay with Eddie, you can take my parents’ room or use the mattresses from last night, warn me when Steve gets back or calls..” she smiled at them, an exhausted smile but she lowered her head, and walked in silence her way upstairs.

  She put the plates on her bedside table, found some Tylenol for Eddie, and proceeded to kneel next to him. With a slow caress on his arm she woke him up, his eyes opened slowly, immediately falling on her, he smiled a little bit at her. 

  “How’re you feeling?” 

  “Exhausted, I feel like sleeping for six months.”

  She giggled softly, kept her eyes at his level, “I have food, water and painkillers, are you feeling up to eating a little bit?” 

  He nodded, she helped him sit down against the headset, by placing her arms under his armpits, and held him up, he winced in pain, she kept muttering apologies in the process. 

  She sat by his side, legs crossed on the duvet, he took the painkillers, and quietly they ate together, slowly. 

When they were done she helped him lie down, the painkillers had barely started working, but lying down next to him, he looked up to her as she brought the pillow closest to him.

  He intertwined their fingers together, their eyes stuck on one another’s, “You saved me. You saved my life, and I..⎼ I don’t know how to thank you,” his raspy voice broke into his whisper. 

  She offered him a timid smile, tightened their fingers for a second, “You don’t have to. You’re my best friend, it’s..⎼ I had to help you, do everything that I could..⎼ it’s..⎼ You know when I saw you there, lying on the ground in Dustin’s arms, lifeless, my brain just entered automatic mode and I had one thing in mind: save you.” 

  She paused, took a breath, her eyes derived for a second from him, his fingertips gently stroked her hand, “I had to try and get you back.  I mean, how could I not? If there was a single chance, ever, of course I would take it, and I would do it again, anytime. I can’t lose you,” her voice failed her as the emotion took over. 

  The fear of losing him had started appearing then, her brain was so fogged on the technical aspect of the situation that she hadn’t had any time to process anything, it was hitting her in the face at full force that she could have lost him, she already imagined his funeral, wearing all black, seeing the coffin falling six feet under. 

  She saw again all the blood, the way his body had stopped breathing, his eyes were just so.. glassy. 

“You were dead. You weren’t breathing, your heart had stopped. I couldn’t allow for it to happen and not try, I wouldn’t have been able to live with myself,” she whispered, afraid her voice would betray her, but a couple of seconds after she broke into sobs.

  The tears were of fear, exhaustion, she needed to let go, couldn’t let it weigh down on her shoulders. 

Through red eyes she saw Eddie’s hand had left her fingers to wipe away the pearly tears on her cheek, himself tearful, one second away from crying,  “If you cry, I’ll cry⎼ and that won’t be fun for anyone,” 

  “After the night we’ve spent, I think we’re allowed to let the tears go,” her voice broke through the sobs, she scooted closer to Eddie, her head on the pillow closest to him, her forehead made contact on his own, and with closed eyes they breathed to calm down. 

  When she opened her eyes she retreated her head a bit, taking in his face, his eyes felt like it burned her skin, like only his eyes were enough to set her on fire.

  He looked at her but it's like he saw right through her, and what she was going to do, he leaned his face a little on the side, his nose a little closer to her's. 

  Looking down at his lips, so inviting, so tempting, their rosy plumpness, her eyes looked up to his', and in a one swift move she put her hand on his cheek and leaned closer to him, until her lips collided with his.

  She discovered how it finally felt like to kiss him, so much time spent together, so many nights spent entangled in bed and she hadn't kissed him, not once, because of a boundary she had set to protect her heart and her mind.

  And she realises now how stupid this boundary was, at least with him, because it's Eddie, who gives the appearance of taking nothing seriously, and he does, but not as much as everyone thinks.

  He's taken for granted, always seen as a monster who preaches Satan, when in fact, he was a dork, a geek who played guitar in an amateur music band, and played a game of fantasy. He smoked because like everyone else he wasn't perfect and he was fine with that. She was too.

  She realised how silly she's been with him as his lips pushed on her delicately. Her fingers travelled to the nape of his neck, she pulled lightly, earning a shy moan from him.

  They both knew it would never get further than this again, he didn't want to cross her boundaries and force a choice out of her out of pity or whatever.

He got to kiss her, though, felt like a win in life.

  Their lips detached, they felt in their bones that it would be the last intimate moment, but that's exactly why she kissed him. 

  She had no idea where she stood with Steve, she didn't want to even think about that now, so in that moment, she let all her guards down, and gave herself what she had wanted in those three months but was so afraid to take : a kiss from Eddie Munson.

  His head fell back on the pillow, face still tilted toward her, a smile ghosting his lips, “Best friends?” he whispered as his fingers made their way back to hers’, he tightened their intertwined fingers.

Her eyes travelled from his lips to his eyes, diving into those soft, brown pupils, she couldn’t help but smile, “Of course, you’re not getting rid of me so easily, Munson.” 

  Her head hit the pillow next to his shoulder, her body leaned towards him, the room fell in a quiet atmosphere, Eddie had fallen asleep rapidly, his soft breath was the only thing she could hear and slowly she let herself fall asleep to a calm sleep. 

  Deep asleep, she didn’t realise right away the front door had been opened, the voices speaking downstairs, nor the steps of the stairs creaking by the weight of people walking up. 

She woke up violently when she realised there was some movement in the house, immediately thinking of Steve, and the teenagers. 

  She slowly got up so she wouldn’t wake Eddie, and walked downstairs quietly, as she got down she heard muffled voices, whispers, and Steve in Nancy’s arms, she paused, trying to not let it go to her head.

They were friends. They’re friends and friends embrace each other, kiss each other, apparently, it would be petty and stupid to let this get under her skin and not appropriate because it's not a priority. 

  She closed her eyes, and breathed in slowly, then walked down the rest of the stairs.

  The two detached as they heard movement, and she joined them in the living room, “What happened? What time is it?” 

  “It’s a little past seven, Max has been hospitalised, for now they’re only sure about external injuries, severely broken legs, they need to do more tests on her, but her mother’s insurance won’t cover it and I have no idea what to do. Dustin has been looked over, he has a sprained ankle, he has a splint and brace. Their parents were called, the police were there, they wanted to question us and for the older ones in the group they wanted to summon us in,” he had talked so fast, rambling on that she could barely catch any of it, but she did. 

  Instinctively she walked closer to him and put both her hands on his shoulders, “Breathe, Steve, breathe. We’ll.. find something, right? We’ll find something to say. We’ll hide Eddie in my house, it’s gonna be fine,” she really wanted to be reassured but she had trouble even convincing herself. 

  His eyes were watery, his brow furrowed, he was short of breath, hands on his hips, she recognized he was in distress, just by the way he looked at her, it pulled at her heartstrings to see him like that, instinctively she brought him towards her, her arms circled his waist, her chin on his shoulder.

  His hands shyly circled around her shoulders, he held her tightly, his fingertips shaking a little bit, “We’re going to find something, we’re not abandoning anyone okay, we need to stick together, close ranks.” 

  Nancy behind her nodded, until her eyes fell on someone coming down the stairs, they detached, but she took his hand and held it tightly, they saw Dustin coming down with his brace, he looked so exhausted.

Her other hand instinctively went up on his back, he gave her a tired smile. 

  She let Steve, Lucas and Erica freshen up in the main bathroom, Nancy went back to sleep with Robin in her parents’ room while she remade the beds on the floor, while Lucas, Erica and Dustin were eating in the kitchen, she saw Steve coming down and Erica going up. 

  She handed the final plate to Steve as she leaned on the counter, he whispered a small thank you, and ate in silence as Dustin and Lucas seemed far in their thoughts, “You guys should sleep a little, we’ll think everything through after some rest, alright?” 

  Absentmindedly, Lucas nodded, his head turned to Steve and her, “You really think we’ll find a way to help Max and Eddie without getting into some problems? The stakes are.. so absurd now.. it didn’t seem so ‘end of the world’ type of threat when all of this began. We just wanted to find Will.” 

  Even if she wasn’t around when all of this began, she could understand what he meant, and she had to admit he was right, the way everything happened every year seemed like it always got so worse.

  “I know I’m new to this, we don’t know each other, but trust me on this, Lucas, we will do everything we can to sort this out. We’ll help Max, if we have to rob a bank we will, but we will find something. And as for Eddie.. We’ll hide him until everything feels safer, and we’ll talk to the police. We’ll handle this.” 

  “What if we don’t?” 

  “We’ll try our hardest, everything we can.” 

  He nodded, but he wasn’t convinced. She couldn’t blame him, they had gone through hell multiple times, they found their way back before, but maybe this time was the point of no return. 

Erica came back down and followed Dustin to lie down, her brother stepped upstairs, Steve and her stood shoulder to shoulder doing the dishes, she cleaned and rinsed it as Steve dried it quietly. 

  With a slight pull on his hand they left to sleep. The house was quiet as everyone was asleep. 

A couple hours later, everyone was up, and while they ate they all worked on their statements for the police, keeping the same version of the story, making sure nothing was left out. The teenagers all preferred to be with them in the police station, even if only the older ones were summoned. 

  Eddie was staying in her house for now, he could barely get up, he was exhausted, but Nancy thought of getting him a walkie so they could stay in contact while he was alone in the house, leaving water and meds by his side.

 The four of them had made sure to hide the bruises around their throats with makeup, that one would be extremely difficult to explain without justifying it with some weird kinda games. They didn’t want to go there.

  The day at the police station was excruciating, they went one by one, and delivered the same deposition, almost word for word, explaining that the murders weren’t Eddie’s doing, that he was known around for playing Dungeons and Dragons, a fantasy game. 

Paranoids had taken him for an escape goat because he fit perfectly, on the outside only.

  Max's condition in the hospital resulted from an attack from Jason and she had been forced down the two levels of stairs from the attic, where they had planned to play D&D in Creel’s house, at night, that Eddie wasn’t there and she didn’t have any news from him since the twentieth. 

  The four versions were the same, and the sheriff let them go.  It was close to six in the afternoon, they drove back to the forest to get Nancy's car, the two cars followed each other as they parked in front of her house.

  They all agreed to share that same version to their parents, then Nancy left, taking everyone except her to drive back to her house, where she knew Lucas's parents and Dustin's mom would be. 

  Steve took Robin home, and drove back to his house. 

He felt uncomfortable in the quietness and emptiness of it, he felt dread, completely impulsively he took a Duffel bag and stuffed some clothes and toiletries in there. Enough for a week at least.

  Nancy was calmly explaining the events of the previous days to their parents, staying true to what they had said at the police station. 

  Even if their parents felt like they were irresponsible, they were glad everyone was safe, that's when Lucas broke through and talked about Max. 

  She wasn't okay, the cost of her stay in the hospital would be crushing her mother who was struggling a lot. It wasn't right, it was unfair. 

 But they stayed quiet.

 She had checked on Eddie, who was fast asleep in her room, until he would get up she decided on cleaning up her house.

It was like a storm had gone through it. And she terribly needed the distraction.

  Sorting out the camping mattresses and sleeping bags in her garage, she kept thinking of Max and how they could help her, of how she would be able to keep taking care of Eddie's injuries, hers' and God she forgot Steve's, with little to no material.

  The dressings, the tulle gras and the hemostatic gauze she used was on prescription, it's not something she could buy like gauze and the rest of it. 

  The ringing of the front door echoed in her house and made her jump in surprise, “Oh God, what is it now.”

  She was stunned to find Steve on her front door, a Duffel bag in hand, for the first time she couldn’t decipher his face, she couldn’t tell what emotion rode his face, tension started to build up as he didn’t say anything. His eyes started to wander on the ground, and there she could see it: embarrassment. 

  “Steve, are you okay?” 

  His eyes closed for a second, and opened to look at her, as his mouth opened to say something they felt the earth move beneath their feet, it started off small but in a matter of seconds gained more force, it was even more violent than the earthquake in the Upside Down. 

  They tried to maintain balance but they failed, stumbling forward, her face was going to hit the pavement but Steve prevented that by grabbing her sides while falling on his side on the grass and tightly holding onto one another’s as they felt the world tear itself violently under their bodies.

  The sun had set only minutes ago, it began to be darker so all that could be seen was the reddish orange light reflecting the teared paths on the grounds, and the roads. 

  The path was clear, one look from the sky and anyone could see it took inspiration from the cardinal points, each path in one way.

  It went from the outside of the Hawkins to its centre, with a final explosion when the paths met, and the earth calmed down. 

  Four paths, four murders. It had to be Vecna. 

  To Nancy it was crystal clear, as she tightly held Dustin and her mother’s arm, in her living room, where minutes ago she was still explaining to their parents what had happened in the last couple of days, and it was so limpid. 

  “Are you okay?” Steve murmured once he felt stable, it had stopped, his hands detached on her arms, but his fingers lingered on her skin. 

  She nodded, her arms moved and she sat up between Steve spread out legs, her hands flat next to his thighs for stability, her head turned to look at him, “Are you? You must have been hit on your side, right?” 

  “I’m fine,” he whispered as he sat back up too, her back against his chest.

  They both thought the same thing, their memories of the day prior resurfaced, Vecna’s plan. 

They were right, he wasn’t dead, and when she turned back around with wide eyes, Steve grew the same worry; Max. Had he managed to get her? 

  “We have to get to Nancy, we should head to the hospital.. Uh, okay, put your bag inside, I’ll check on Eddie and we walk to Nancy’s house, c’mon.” 

  They got back on their feet and rushed inside the house, she warned Eddie about what was going on, he asked them to be careful and to stay in touch, she met Steve by her front door and together they walked towards Nancy’s house, three houses from her’s. 

  Nancy was outside, along with Dustin and Lucas walking to her car, they understood each other immediately, and they hopped in the car, driving to the hospital.

They observed the consequences through the windows, the road was split in half, with an entrance to the Upside Down right in the centre of it, along the road. 

  They didn’t know yet how the city looked, downtown, that the public library had been destroyed because of the major explosion, where the paths had met.

They could see the vines in between the two parts of the road, it reflected some reddish pink light, they were right, Vecna’s plan had worked, the rift between the Upside Down and Hawkins is now open. 

  When they got to the hospital the roads weren’t blocked by traffic yet, it was pretty smooth except for driving on the side of the road to avoid the gigantic rift. The hospital was a bit farther in town and wasn’t destroyed by the earthquake, that was a good sign. 

  It also gave them the information that Max wasn’t the one murdered by Vecna, or the hospital would have been destroyed. Who was it, then? And where?

  With two visitors only, Lucas and Dustin went to see her as Steve, Nancy and her waited in the waiting area on the floor, they were quiet, sat soundlessly, Steve’s leg started bouncing.

  She had closed her eyes, her hands covering her eyes in frustration and anticipation, until she felt the vibrations of Steve's leg, her eyes glared at his leg, then at him.

  She put her hand on his thigh, it made him stop his movements, his face turned to her and their eyes connected. He intertwined their fingers together, patiently waiting for Lucas and Dustin's return.

  Nancy talked to a doctor about Max's condition, and even though they tried their hardest to listen, her and Steve couldn't seem to focus on it.  There was a lot surrounding them, and the most dangerous of it all: Vecna wasn’t dead, he had survived, it seemed like their efforts were for nothing. Max’s sacrifice was for nothing, Eddie’s too.

  Max's mother arrived shortly after Lucas and Dustin left to get Nancy, Steve and her, not caring about the visitors’ rule, the lady at the desk wasn’t even there to worry about it, perhaps the aftermath of the gates breaking through was coming to the hospital.

As they walked towards her room, she felt uneasy, out of place, in front of the door, ajar, she pulled on Steve's hand.

  “Wait, it's..– I'll wait for you in the waiting area. I shouldn't be here, I'm intruding, I don't know her like you guys do, it doesn't make sense for me to be there,” her uneasiness spoke for her, distress on her face.

  “You– you saved her on your own, we were the helpers, you deserve your place as much as we do.

 I promise to you she will appreciate your presence,” he murmured to her as he made a few steps closer to her, she could feel his breath on her face.

  She searched in his eyes, and all she found was assurance. 

He pulled on her hand and together they entered her room.

  Max's legs were in casts, she had IVs running down, she was also attached to a monitor beeping along her heartbeat. 

  She smiled faintly, tired, Lucas stood beside her alongside her mother. Dustin had sat down, his brace next to him.

  She watched Max and her mom interact, and saw she cared for her daughter. The woman was exhausted by the two jobs she had but by the smile she offered her daughter she could see she was so relieved.

  She hadn't realised she had zoned out for a few minutes, lost in her thoughts, Max's mother reminded her that she hadn't seen her parents in a long time, and that she wished her parents would be more like her. 

  Steve repeated her name, and with a pull on her hand, she was back with them, “Sorry, what?”

  Steve's head turned towards the adult, who was looking her way, “Max said you and Lucas were to thank for saving her, I don't know how to tha–”

  “Oh no no, Lucas was the bravest, he saved her when he protected her from Jason, he was in a serious psychotic episode, he could have gotten hurt too. I barely did anything.”

  “Still, I want to thank you both, she wouldn't be here without you.”

  “Please, it was nothing, it– Of course we helped her, I mean, how could we not? Also.. I think we would like to help you with the bill, we know your insurance won’t cover most of it, we could organize something to collect some money? I don’t know, I just.. I want to help.” 

  Mrs Mayfield smiled, watery eyes, she couldn’t help but walk towards her and embrace her, her hands shaking on her shoulders. She was taken aback, at first but gently put her hand on her back. 

She detached her arms and went to hug Lucas in a hurry. 

She kept murmuring thank yous.

They talked rapidly to Max, and gave her some time with her mother. While they left, Nancy suggested that they try to find the fourth path, they drove downtown and they saw how everything was destroyed, rampants were slowly crawling their way up to the buildings, around the gate on the road.

  They followed one path, but got directed towards the trailer park, they reversed back downtown, they found a route that didn’t seem familiar to them, it led to Benny’s Burger old place, now squatted by the basketball team.

Lucas knew who it was, because it could only be one person, who had gone completely off the rails and was the perfect prey for Vecna; Jason. 

  They didn’t need to exit the vehicle, the place was completely destroyed, Lucas explained what he believed. They felt partly relieved that he wouldn’t be after them again, but the dangerousness of the situation quickly surpassed the relief.

  The real End of the World was coming. 

Eddie was asleep in her room, Steve was in her living room, lying on the couch, he couldn’t sleep.

The light of the moon shone through the window, and he was lost in his thoughts, hand tucked under his head on the pillow.

  He had quit thinking of Vecna and what they would do, he was clueless, he felt he was always three feet from everyone, always so late to pick up on anything, always the last to understand anything. 

Like his father had always told him.  He wasn’t there very often but when he was he always made sure to let his son know he was a failure. 

  He turned on his side, grabbing the blanket to cover his neck, now facing the coffee table, the TV. 

His eyes travelled to the staircase, and his thoughts shifted to her;

  The three of them had eaten in her room quietly, Eddie managed to sit down on his own, they had explained in small sentences what had happened, but the two sounded and looked completely defeated.

  Shortly after she changed the dressings on Eddie’s wounds, then Steve’s, and hers’, with the medical supplies Nancy and Steve had helped her steal in a closed pharmacy after they had driven Lucas and Dustin home.

  She had worked on their wounds in complete silence, deep in her thoughts, under Steve’s careful and curious eyes when she did Eddie’s, the two young men had shared a couple questioning eye contacts. Puzzled by her silence. And when she did Steve, he was as silent as her in the main bathroom, just looking at her, until she was finished and he hadn’t realised she was done. 

  They had gone to sleep without a sound, Eddie was tired from sitting up on his own, he drifted off to sleep quickly. She  stood next to him, couldn’t sleep either, staring into the night through the window. 

She heard Eddie’s slow breathing, but somehow couldn’t sleep. She turned on her back, facing the ceiling, she exhaled loudly.

  She sat up, and quietly walked down the stairs, she tried to not make any sound, so as to not wake Steve. 

She prepared a cup with some honey, the tea bag as she waited for the water to boil. 

 Steve had seen her walk down to the kitchen silently, he had an internal debate whether or not to join her. 

 She poured the boiling water in her cup, her spoon stirred mindlessly the honey, Steve had an impression she was so deep in her thoughts she hadn’t realised he was there. 

His hand slowly approached her shoulder, and when his fingertips softly brushed over her skin her head turned to him.

He could see her tired eyes, like himself she was overthinking and couldn’t stop the train of thoughts in her head. He understood the feelings she had, because he felt the same, unsure, confused, numb of everything, not even trusting her own mind. 

She couldn't tell what she felt, because she didn't know anything. It was the first time ever she felt like she didn't know, or understood anything she felt, or knew. 

Steve's hands wrapped around her shoulders, her side against his, she turned herself in front of him, her forehead falling on his shoulder, his hands drifting to her waist, he intertwined his fingers on the low of her back as she softly pulled him towards her by his waist.

She knotted his shirt in her fists, in a desperate manoeuvre to never let him go. 

“I know you want us to have the talk I promised we would have.. but I'm so tired.. so.. drained. I feel like I don't know myself anymore, it's been.. the last couple of days have completely changed me and I don't know. I just.. I don't know,” she started, turning the side of her face so her nose could hide in his neck.

“The reason I left you that night was.. because I anxiously grew worried to have you involved in all of this, not because I thought you wouldn't be.. capable of handling this or anything like that, but because I know the weight the secrets of the Upside Down holds on you. It's heavy on your chest and the more you go through with this the more it damages everything. I didn't want you to suffer like we are, like I am.”

She held onto him tighter, her fists almost pulling at the material in his back, “I understand. I know that what you're saying are not lies, because I feel it too. I feel that in pending doom over our heads. It eats your brain slowly with anxiety, and now, when I remember the look on your face from then you..– Everything that triggered me then – still triggers me now – was because of the Upside Down and I'm so sorry I thought you would ever try to play me when you've shown me what was and what could be.”

She paused, mainly to try and breath, shaky breaths left her lips as she tried to let out what she felt for him, it overwhelmed her, having so much to say, to apologise for, to admit. 

“You were a constant thing in my life and I need it back, I can't believe I would be so sure that you're still the same asshole from highschool. I've spent months sleeping around, believing it would stop the insecurities, fill whatever emptiness I feel, all because of something that's from a Sci-fi movie. I've wasted so much unnecessary energy being jealous of Nancy, having sex with my best friend–” she kept rambling but Steve stopped listening.

One of his hands detached itself from her back to cup her chin, he leaned his head down and in one swift move, he shut her overwhelming talk with the plumpness of his lips.

She didn't respond at first, letting her brain process the information that he was kissing her, until she realised he was kissing her! 

She leaned closer, and pressed harder on his lips, one of her hands moving to his cheek softly, they quickly separated, foreheads touching.

 “Promise me you'll still be here when I wake up tomorrow,” she whispered before she put her lips back on his in a fervent kiss.

“I'll be here with you every day of my life, in the morning, the afternoon, the night.. I can't get enough of you,” he muttered through his breath as he tried to catch his breath.

  “Just what I needed to hear,” she murmured, her hands were on both his cheeks as their lips attached, she tried to make them move towards the living room.

 Their clothes rapidly found their place on the floor, he had kissed his way up her tight in anticipation, feeling the goosebumps, watching her every breath.

 The soft whimpers and moans escaping her mouth, watching her chasing up her pleasure on top of him, it's a sight he thought he wouldn't witness ever again.

But he loved to see her chase pleasure, and on top of him, she had pinned him down with her hands, their fingers laced together, small encouragement left his lips in whispers as her hips moved against his.

She had made an expected movement, where he was deeper, felt more of her, and it drove him crazy.

She had completely leaned on him, her breasts fully squished against his chest, she pulled him in a kiss.

 Her fingers detached from his hands to move through his hair, his hands found their adored place on her hips, painfully slowly she moved her hips and he broke their kiss, a moan leaving his lips.

 She smirked against his lips and left kisses at his neck as she moved ever so slowly, herself feeling whole with him, she felt it build up on the low of the stomach, the knots were tightening.

 She was trembling in pleasure when the knots released themselves, and him too, her lips still in the crook of his neck she was breathless, leaving little pecks here and there.

 His warmth was burning but she felt so good in his embrace, like a cocoon.

It felt ethereal what they felt for one another, the content they felt, the goodness it brought to have one another.

 If it wasn't for the sword of Damocles on their heads.

If it wasn't for Vecna and his army, the life ending threat, it would be perfect.

 It would be perfect.

-> façade, the sequel

[lesbiannancytruther]

flayed robin au...post apocalypse..😏😏

this is a bit broad so im sorry if it isnt exactly what ur looking for!!

also this is my first thing i've ever done in this style so go easy on me </3

Nancy Wheeler was not new to the Upside Down. Not new to the dim light, the rotting smell, the persistent slime that clung to her skin and soaked the roots of her hair. She didn't think she could forget any of it if she tried.

When she, Robin, and Steve had pulled their way out of dark mirrored realm and were met with sunlight, she humored the fact that maybe, hopelessly, this was it. Never again. Nancy Wheeler would never again breath the stinking air that weighed down her lungs and weakened her iron will.

It was just too good to be true.

Standing on that hill, where she was surrounded by people who felt so... distant. They weren't there when she experienced the new memories that made her head ache in a way she didn't know was possible. That's where she felt any fleeting hope crumble to nothing.

Breathing that air, that toxic cloud, she shouldn't have been surprised that everything went to shit directly after.

What was left of Hawkins fell apart. In the hurry to escape the violent weather that racked the small towns with destructive winds and lightning that flashed blood red, random civilians found themselves in the woods, just outside of town, where they were left vulnerable when the monsters followed shortly after.

In the months that followed, Nancy learned to slaughter every kind of creature that lurked in the murk of the Upside Down, reliving old trauma after old trauma in her desperate fight to survive.

She figured she'd have lost the better parts of her if Robin hadn't trucked through the apocalypse, not without heavy complaining and slightly concerning commentary, albeit, but she figured Robin's unwavering humor was part of what kept her sane.

Robin was so strong, not that Nancy ever doubted this fact, but it was to the point where every day she felt new awe for Robin's lasting humor and compassion. There were points where Nancy tried to get Robin to open up, to talk about what must be bothering her in all of this mess, tried to forget about herself and her problems to help someone who helped her by just being herself, but she knew it wasn't often enough.

That's why she blames herself, why she's chosen to lead the charge to fixing this.

Maybe she should give herself more credit, after all, every day she fights for her life, every once in awhile she receives wounds that leave permanent scars. Her hair is permanently singed at the tips from the constant fires she lights and spreads. Who could blame her for not being there? For not noticing the signs? Robin drifting away, flickering in and out in weird ways? Nancy figured that one day she'd just wandered off and gotten scaped up, that it was the trauma just catching up to her.

Not that she was flayed. Not that she might be broken beyond repair.

Nancy wasn't sure why she thought Vecna would be one for originality, of course he would try to recreate the Mind Flayer, of course he'd target someone on the inside, someone vulnerable.

Of course she was destined to lose someone else. Of course she wasn't able to protect them.

Nancy is forced to recall some of the memories she did her best to bury. Will's screams as they burned the monster out, the feeling of thrusting the white hot poker into his side to stop him from strangling his own mother. Terrible memories. Necessary memories.

It's her idea to act as bait. Robin seems to have taken on the role that Billy did, all that time ago, and she likes to target Nancy specifically to relay messages. To make her ache. She can't tell if it's because Robin is still in there, trying to tell her something, or if this is Vecna's unique and cruel revenge for lighting him up in his home territory.

Nancy thinks the worst part of this is that Robin still acts sort of like herself. She's meaner, she berates Nancy for things she once comforted her about, but she has the same endearing snark. The same mannerisms. It tells Nancy that Robin is still in there, she just needs help rising to the surface. The failed sauna experiment of last summer would not fail with Nancy in charge. Not with Robin on the line.

Nancy would almost call Robin's behavior flirty, she calls her "priss" and "princess" with a sneer on her face, she touches her, way more than she used to. Robin'll twist her curls with ring clad fingers, grab her shoulders and breathe threats into her ear, one time she even kissed her hand.

The final straw is when the monster that has a grip on the girl she's grown to care an immeasurable amount about crosses a line she didn't even know was there.

"You're so self-absorbed that you didn't even know how I felt about you. Typical for a serial heartbreaker, huh Wheeler?"

This strikes... a chord. No matter how distracted Nancy was in the apocalypse, struggling to survive, there were always the quiet moments where she was left with herself. Her own thoughts. Her worst enemy.

She broke up with Jonathan because she felt they'd grown irreparably apart. She was different, changed, she didn't even know what she wanted anymore. He was the same, he could not follow her anymore. She shut the budding hurt feelings from Steve down as quickly as she could, made it known how she felt. Made it known that they could never work again.

At first she thought that the affection she felt for Robin was a fate-granted punishment, that she was doomed to love another person in a complicated way, another person for her to lose.

And yet, she realized that her love for Robin was the opposite of complicated, that she loved Robin so purely and unapologetically, that it was how she treated that love that made it complicated.

Eventually she had to confront what made it complicated. She wasn't stupid, she knew what it meant, it was just... really hard for her to learn how to accept it.

It's that same love that pushes her towards this plan. She was evicting that fucking monster.

It's face to face with Robin Buckley in a ring of fire, who hisses and spits insults at her in a venomous and inherently un-Robin tone, that Nancy allows herself to feel hope. She will be triumphant, with blazing torch in hand, she will not let herself fail. Not now, with those she's survived with the past months around the fire, keeping the ground ablaze, making the circle smaller and smaller.

They're only a foot apart when Nancy lunges, binding a writhing Robin with her arms, whispering.

"Please Birdie, please come back. We have so much to talk about."

She doesn't think she'll ever forget how Robin looked in those moments, how Robin's curled fingers shredded the sweat-soaked skin of her exposed arms, cutting her deep. How Robin felt in her arms, the blackened veins, her expression contorted in agony as black smoke poured from her and into the air, flinching constantly from the flames. Horrifically familiar.

She's never held onto someone so tight, she doesn't think.

It's later, much later, where they lay side by side on a cot, looking at each other, that they exchange apologies.

It took Robin awhile to recover, with her pulse dropping so low and her body so limp after the presence of the Mind Flayer left her that Nancy was sure she'd lost her, forever. Nancy takes on caring for Robin, and just... talks to her, while she sleeps. Tells her all the things she missed, how much she missed her.

It's so much harder for Nancy to talk to Robin now that she's conscious, now that she's looking at her. Harder than it used to be. Maybe it's because she's accepted her feelings, after all this time.

"I'm so sorry for not seeing the signs. For not noticing until... it was too late."

"Come on, Nance, that wasn't your fault. It wasn't anyone's fault."

"You don't get it. I was so... caught up... If I was just there when it got you-"

"Nance. I know what you're doing. Don't. Matter of fact, I'm sorry."

"For what!? You were possessed!"

"Yeah, but the things I said-"

"Nope. Not letting you do this."

"Nance, I-"

She wasn't expecting to silence Robin's desperate attempts at apologizing with a kiss.

Robin isn't expecting it either.

Nancy pulls away, already about to apologize, talk about how stupid she was for thinking what Flayed Robin said was true, when Robin pulls her back, and she's submerged in something other than despair for the first time in too long.

lmk what u think <3 im always open to prompts lol

[eddies-hid3out]

I watched Silence of the Lambs the other day, which then led to me rewatching Mind Hunter so now I have a brain worm that won't leave me alone. I'll never write it because I can't get it coherent enough in my mind, so I'm throwing the bare bones out there! It's a bit of a lengthy ramble, I'll put it below the cut.

Eddie lives au where Vecna didn't succeed in 86 so Hawkins didn't go to shit, and when he finally resurfaces he has to start from scratch.

Eddie lives, but he isn't cleared of the crimes. All the big wigs who could make sure he's declared innocent agree that he's the perfect scapegoat to hide the upside down. He's found guilty. They spin the narrative that he became obsessed with the Victor Creel murders, he studied them and used them as inspiration for his ritual killings. The fact that Nancy and Robin visited Victor is twisted and used as evidence against him. So he's shut away in Pennhurst, even if he does talk about what he went through no one will believe him, because who believes the guy in the nuthouse? Roughly a decade passes and Eddie has gotten used to the monotony of his new life. It sucks and he's bored but he finds comfort in the fact that there's been no more killings. At least him rotting away is worth something because he finally got to help, to be useful.

Until someone is found. A girl in her teens who has been left broken and bloody, and in walks you. FBI agent (BAU) in your late 20s/early 30s, a little young to be where you are but you're good at reading people and fantastic when interviewing killers to get insight. So it's only natural when word of copycat killings in Hawkins reaches you, you go out there to talk to the previous copycat, Eddie Munson.

Eddie's doesn't give you much when you first meet him, he plays into the whole satanic panic thing but it only takes one interview for you to know that he's innocent. You keep visiting with him, you want the truth of what happened but more than that you want to get to know him. You speak to his friends, ask them about 1986, ask Nancy and Robin why they were visiting Victor if it wasn't because of Eddie. They're hard to get a hold of and don't give you much but you know they're hiding something.

And Eddie, he tries so hard not to like you. You're just the latest in a long line of authority figures to come waltzing into his life and it's never ended well before so why should now be any different? But you're kind, and easy to talk to. You treat him like a human, and something deep in his gut tells him that you are different. That maybe he could tell you the truth and you'd not only believe him but help him too.

[smithsibsceo]

PAUSE. kas!robin???? i’m interested im intrigued i am ready for the heartbreak….(pls tell me more i’d love to hear abt it!! <3)

AHH YES SORRY FOR THE LATE REPLY I FELL ASLEEP AND THEN FORHOT ABOUT IT BAHAHHAA!!! SO.

its set in s4 vol2, in a universe where nancy and robin go to hold of the bats and steve and eddie go defeat vecna (they all want to keep the kids as far away from the upside down as they can). now, things go a little differently. the bats begin to come through the vents in eddie's trailer, and nancy, being nancy, is like right. no ones dying today. not on my watch. so she cuts the rope, leaves robin calling after her, and goes to hold off the bats. they start attacking her, yes, but she has her gun. mild wounds appear, mostly on her back, but shes smart, and she knows what shes doing, so they all stay mild.

but then she hears robin.

then she sees robin.

she comes galloping out of the trailer, a tangle of limbs, screaming nancy's name as if her life depends on it.

nancy's heart drops.

because this wasnt part of the plan. robin was supposed to stay nice and safe whilst nancy shouldve taken the hits, shouldve pulled the shortest straw. and she was always planning on coming back to robin in the end.

then robin screams, and screams some more, and then nancy opens her mouth and does the same because now the bats are on robin.

nancy goes ballistic.

shes shooting blindly left and right, but all thats ringing in her ears is robin's pleas. every time she thinks shes done it, thinks the bats are all down, ten more come from each direction, sinking their claws into her flesh.

after around five minutes, she does it.

bat carcasses litter the ground. the ones that are still twitching she stomps on, hears their final breathes leave them.

far away, bleeding and bare, lies robin.

nancy chokes back a sob.

she runs over to the girl, cradles her in her arms. nearly collapses in relief as she realises shes still breathing.

robins death scene is along the lines of eddie's. nancy tries to comfort her, tries to convince her it'll be okay, that steve and eddie'll be coming soon and they can get her to a hospital, but robin just hums. nancy tries to lift her up but robin whimpers (and the wounds on her own back are starting to sting like a bitch, not that she would ever admit that), and grips onto nancy's arm, weakly. says no, no hospital, it's too late. says its not worth it, my times up.

says i love you, nancy wheeler, and i always will.

and nancys like love = platonic bc shes a girl 👍 got it.

she dont got it.

robin seems to see it in her eyes, sees that she thinks robin views nancy as just a friend, and grips tighter around nancys forearm.

says no nancy. i love you.

oh, thinks nancy. oh.

because she realises, after all this time, that she feels the same way.

and she wants to open her mouth, wants to beg the girl dying in her arms to just explain a little more. but before she can do that robin wheezes again, and chokes out something else.

she asks for steve. asks when he'll be there (but nancy knows there wont be time. and she think robin does too). tells nancy to make sure he takes care of himself, and he doesnt blame himself for what happened. make sure he knows she loves him more than anything.

nancy shakes. she's holding down sobs, making sure she doesnt jolt robin with her twitching limbs. she nods. she says yes, of course. of course.

then robin starts to cry. and soon nancy does too.

robin croaks about steve, about the kids, about her, her voice damp with tears. and nancy holds her, steady in her lap. she positions herself so shes draped over robin, and wraps her arms under her - a hug, sort of. in a little makeshift way.

nancy burrows her head into the crook of robins shoulder, coated in blood. she holds her tighter, can feel the girls strength escaping.

dont go, she croaks, muffled. dont leave us.

im sorry, says robin.

its not fair, she whispers in retaliation. i hate it.

anything nancy wheeler hates should be running for its life, jokes robin. youre incredible.

come back to me, nancy pleads.

youre incredible.

robin goes limp in her arms.

AND THEN. OOH BOY. THEN.

cut to around ten minutes later. steve and eddie come back from killing vecna (which ends the same way it did in canon). nancy's still sitting with robin's body, just staring straight ahead, shaking like crazy. eddie sees them first. nancy and him lock eyes, and nancy shakes her head. shakes her head as in dont let steve see.

dont break him again.

but its too late.

steve lets out a cry, a choked sob that so clearly was meant to be much more. long story short, he breaks down. he's screaming, crying, scratching at eddie when he tries to restrain him. he crawls over to robins body, gently cradles her out from nancy's lap and into his arms, screaming. robins head lolls back in his embrace, and her unstaring eyes meet nancy's. its only for a split second, before steve repositions his hands so he can properly hold robin. but she sees.

nancy cant move, cant do anything but follow steve with her eyes. again, shes shaking like a leaf in the wind, like shes about to fly off at any moment.

steve keeps whispering no, no, no. no, no. no. his whispers turn into screams, which turn into sobs, and he pulls robins body further into his arms, drapes his larger frame around hers, and breaks. eddie's distressed, keeps trying to gently pull him back, into an embrace, but steve wont have it. he screams, claws, kicks eddie, spits in his face even, at one point.

it takes nancy to even get him to look up.

she tells him what robin said. tells him how much he meant to her. tells him she loved him more than anything.

but she still left me, he whispers.

nancy pulls him into a hug. he doesn't fight back, but he still wails. they sit there, shaking and crying in a tangle of limbs for around two minutes, before steve pulls away and goes back to hugging robin's body, pressing kisses to her cold forehead and begging for her to wake up.

ANYWAYS - they have to leave robin's body. nancy's already injured and cant stop shaking long enough to be able to even clench her fists, and eddie has to focus on getting steve out, because he's in no condition to do that himself. steve throws a fit obviously, doesn't want to leave her, ad eventually ends up having a panic attack, which is when eddie and nancy gently escort him and themselves back through the gate.

now, the rest of the group's story follows canon. max still dies for a minute before el saves her, and still ends up in a coma. nancy and eddie find lucas and erica holding her, wailing as the paramedics arrive (erica asks for robin in a shaky voice, fiddling with the hem of her dress in the way eleven year olds do, and eddie's heart breaks).

then theyre in the hospital. nancy and eddie've managed to get steve to at least stop sobbing and screaming, and he sits, shaking, in a hospital chair, staring blankly at the wall with a very anxious looking dustin hovering beside him.

eddie asks about robin. asks what happened.

nancy snaps. she cant help it. it always went like this - something terrible would happen, something bad, and nancy would bottle up all of her feelings until she was bent of shape. barks out an 'i dont want to talk about it' before dropping her head to her chest and breathing out. she apologises, after a few seconds. eddie understands. he's very good at that, nancy realises.

they get the update about max, gain the knowledge that shes alive, but in a coma. nancy holds lucas as he cries, feeling as if the situation is all too familiar. but she doesn't break. not yet. because she has to stay strong for her family.

the day passes. lucas and erica decide they'll stay the night in max's room. eddie helps nancy get steve settled in his house (which - nancy isn't comfortable leaving him alone in that state, but it's not like she can take him home to her parents). nancy goes home. she doesn't hug her mother. her dad is asleep.

she goes straight up to her room, and screams. she screams and screams and screams. she tears a poster (the tom cruise one) off her wall, and rips it up, feels the fragmented edges of the paper underneath her skin. she grabs her pillows sitting neatly on her bed and throws them against the wall, watches them thud against the plaster. with a sweeping motion of her arm, her ceramic piggy bank is pushed from her desk onto the floor, and she stomps on it. over and over and over again, still screaming. she can feel the shards underneath her shoe, can feel them breaking more and more with each blow of her foot. there are tears streaming down her face, and she lets out a cracked sob, that turns into another scream. she can feel it rushing out of her throat, feels the way it scratches at the back of her neck till shes hoarse.

it takes ten minutes of that until her cries die down. she doesnt sleep that night - doesnt sleep for many after that either - and instead sits on her carpet, runs her fingers through it's thick strands, and shakes.

miles away, underneath nancy's world, underneath hawkins, It opens it's eyes. It sits up. It is given a choise, and It takes it.

Robin Buckley went into that gate, and a month later, Kas comes out.

AHHHHHHHHHH THIS WAS MEANT TO BE JUST A QUICK SUMMARY OF THE FIRST CHAPTER WTF WHY DID IT TURN INTO AN ESSAY. AND YEAH. HOPEFULLY THIS WILL BE TURNED INTO AN ACTUAL MULTI-CHAPTER FIC (FIRST CHAPTER IS IN THE WORKS AS WE SPEAK) BUT YEAH - COMPLETELY NANCY WHEELER, RONANCE, PLATONIC STOBIN CENTERED (i put steve and nancy througb the ringer in this, sorry). BECAUSE IT WILL HOPEFULLY BE A FIC, I WON'T TELL YOU THE MASSIVE PLOT TWIST/CHANGE/IDEA THINGY FOR THE END SO TEHRE'S NO SPOILERS BUT MY GOD - ITS FUCKING ANGSTY.

thannk you so much for the asks guys, you have no idea how much they mean to me <3333333 hope you enjoyed my long ass ramble!!!!!!!!

[tirednerd2012]

I wish Steve and Jonathan had deeper writing for growing up , like how I wish Nancy and Jonathan had deeper writing that way too.

Like give me Steve and Jonathan who would hang out in the woods together because their houses were so close. They would see each other almost every day, happily hanging out. Steve, who notices how shit Lonnie is early on, always finds a way to get Jonathan out of the house- is also happy and unbothered if will is there.

Drifting away when Jonathan has to start working and they both are in middle school- steve starts gaining popularity because he’s playing on the basketball team. The insults he used in season 1 are harsher in that perspective, because he knows how much those comments hurt. That’s why he chose them.

Then having a heart to heart in like season 3 or maybe even in the future when they’re trying to get Vecna. If this is the au where Jonathan is his victim, everyone rotates making sure he’s okay before their plan of attack. They’re sitting together and it’s kinda still tense between them. But Steve, kinda pulling a Jonathan with bringing up a memory for a conversation starter is like “..remember when we both got stuck in a tree when we were kids after betting who’d climb higher?” Jonathan just glanced over confused. Then Steve finishes the story, gets both of them laughing alittle. And starts apologizing, saying he regrets being so awful because Jonathan was his best friend for so long during a lot of rough shit. But he threw it away just to act like an asshole. He admits he would like to get close again, if that’s okay. After Vecna is defeated.

Jonathan is abit skeptical, but slowly relaxes when he sees how genuine Steve is being. And he knows Steve changed alot. He’s seen it with the kids, with Robin. Etc. so he says he’d like that too, it would nice to be close again.

Okay but why does this make season 1 hurt even more. Jonathan and Steve are close friends growing up until they drift apart due to Steve gaining popularity and Jonathan starting to feel unwanted by his friend. But before that, they were close. They would meet in the woods outside of their houses and Steve was the first one to realize Jonathan wasn't being truthful about Lonnie. He would see his friend meet with him covered in bruises and Will was always with him, because while he insisted that it was Will who wanted to be around, which wasn't untrue, Jonathan couldn't stand the thought of leaving Will alone with Lonnie. There was never as much of a scratch on Will when Jonathan was around. But Steve didn't mind because he liked being around the Byers brothers. As he and his own father start arguing more, Jonathan listens and stands by him when Steve feels like there's no one.

The two would get into all sorts of mischief when they hang out in the woods, and Will even tries taking pictures on Jonathan's basic camera of the two. But when middle school comes around, they start drifting apart. Steve loves the attention he gets from basketball and the approval of his father that comes with it, and it starts to lead to him and Jonathan no longer being friends due to Jonathan being viewed as the creep and loser, even at such a young age. And while Steve always regrets it, he doesn't know how to turn things around so he drives it even further until he starts hanging around Tommy H and Carol who actively bully Jonathan when he's around and Steve does nothing about it, driving them apart completely.

Then Will goes missing. And Steve knows that has to kill Jonathan and when Tommy H makes the comment about Jonathan killing Will, he hits his shoulder and tells him to shut up. Nancy, whose little brother is best friends with Will, tries to comfort Jonathan and while Steve is immediately jealous, he believes her when she says she is sure Will is fine. He has to be, right? It's Will. Smart, resourceful, kind Will. Nancy starts to avoid him in order to help Jonathan look for Will and Barb. He sneaks to her window and sees Jonathan and Nancy together and he's pissed. But then Will's death is announced.

Steve's so mad that he doesn't even feel that he is mourning for the loss of a kid he once knew. Tommy suggests they paint the theater sign and Steve just goes along with. Obviously the confrontation happens and Steve picks at Jonathan more so than Nancy because he feels betrayed. He points out everything about Lonnie, knowing how much it would hurt him, but Jonathan kept walking. He saw the pause when he brought Joyce into it, but then he brings Will into it. He tells Jonathan he's not surprised Will is gone, that Will was a disgrace, knowing that would get to Jonathan more than anything. He had witnessed firsthand for years how much Jonathan adored that kid and it's the day after his funeral. The fight happens and Jonathan is still arrested.

It's this and his feelings for Nancy that cause Steve to snap. He told someone who helped him through a lot of shit that his little brother basically deserved to die, the day after his funeral. He goes to Jonathan's house to apologize because he feels horrible. Then he ends up helping with the fight and he wants to attempt to make things right, but by the end of it, Nancy is back with him, distant sure, but back with him, and Jonathan is with Will. He walks into the hospital room after everyone's left and Joyce went to talk to the doctors, hoping to find Jonathan, but finds the two boys asleep, Will in the bed and Jonathan in the chair right beside him, holding Will's hand. It doesn't look like either of them slept much throughout that week and he leaves, wanting to give them space.

Then Jonathan and Nancy end up together and Steve insists it's fine, because he wants both of them to be happy and he recognizes he has a long path of redemption. He becomes close with Dustin and starts to realize the stress the kids can have but also understands why Jonathan loves them so much. Then he grows close with Robin. Jonathan and the Byers move away, which sucks because Steve never completely made it right, but he's happy that they get to go somewhere they can leave all of this behind them and start healing.

The next time he sees Jonathan, he is the next Vecna victim. Will and Nancy are an absolute mess about how to fix this and save him, Jonathan is quiet, El is angry, Mike is distant, the other party members are worried and now there is another member of the group (Argyle, Steve thinks that's his name), a nervous mess about it, too. He and Jonathan step outside of the cabin while the others are going over a plan. Will and Nancy are so invested into the plan, a way to save the person they each love most, that they don't see Jonathan needing some air and stepping out. Steve decides to follow just in case.

Then he brings up how they used to climb trees and how Steve almost broke his arm when they were trying to get down. Jonathan is confused as Steve sits beside him and he recalls how Jonathan caught his arm and helped him on another branch so he didn't. And Jonathan is skeptical but he knows how hard Steve is trying to be a better person so he listens, and says he remembers. Steve apologizes for "ruining it all by being an asshole" but Jonathan says he wasn't exactly perfect in the friendship either, that he could have fought for their friendship instead of just letting everything happen. They both made a lot of mistakes along the way and they're each just trying to be better people for it. Jonathan also notes how Steve is with the kids and Robin, and that he is a good person. And Steve says how he always wanted to make things right, just never got the chance. Jonathan says they're alright, and that they have been since Steve helped save Will.

Then there's silence and Jonathan asks Steve for a favor. Of course, Steve wants to make things right and he feels like helping will solidify their friendship again. He explains that he knows he will most likely die at the hands of Vecna, and when Steve tries to tell him that won't happen, Jonathan asks to let him finish. He knows he might die, and he's okay with it, but he also know Nancy and Will won't leave him in a fight, even if their own lives depended on it. So he asks Steve, if it comes to it, to get them out of there, to keep them safe. He's seen the lengths Steve is willing to go through for the group, and he trusts Steve with Will, which Steve knows is a big deal. "I just want them to be okay, to move on after all of this is over." So Steve agrees that he will do what he needs to in order to keep them safe, but he's also going to do everything he can to save Jonathan, too. Then he says after all of this is over, he'd like to be friends again and Jonathan responds with that they already are. But it would be nice to be close again.

Steve is the one, alongside Argyle, to bring the Byers-Hopper family food while they stay in the hospital after Jonathan is put in a coma. He's there during the fight when Vecna takes over Jonathan's body, and tries to keep everyone safe, but when "Jonathan" brings up how Steve turned his back on him, he hesitates, and is knocked out in the fight.