#libraries 4eva

[bitterblackberry]

i’m rereading library wars: love & war and theres a chapter where weekly new world has to censor the word barber, and it’s crazy, because when i was a preteen i thought this was ridiculous. but you take one look at tiktok or instagram or whatever and people are censoring everything from shit to lesbian to knife to european like it’s insane but library wars really isnt nearly as far off reality as i felt it was jeez

ms. orikuchi mentions that as a reporter its just become second nature for her to censor herself to avoid takedowns and it makes me think about how you see twt & tiktok users come over here and theyre saying stuff like g@y or k111 even though you dont need to here. its second nature and thats really freaky. everyones so obsessed with being marketable to advertisers that they take away completely normal words

[evapo-rated]

TIMMY FAILURE FANS HMU RN!!!

The 3 remaining Timmy Failure fans better come up to me and infodump on me (/lh /j)

I only got to read book 0, my bestie bagel informed me that it was actually made after the whole series and after the movie was made, YES IM GOING BACK TO THE LIBRARY TO READ MORE THEYRE MISSING THE FIRST ONE

Also shoutout to the bestie 4EVA bagel cause he introduced me to this tiny lil guy (he is 11 years old like Nate) love ya 💖💖💖

BTW IT WAS REALLY FUNNY and also randomly just throws you into a 🥺🥺🥺 moment it has some heart throbbing moments

[yakultii]

books I bought today: it’s been so long since I bought a book in general bc massive (stagnant) reading slump excluding academic text and also libraries 4eva but today I felt like spending money I don’t have in the hope I’d feel a little more alive (spoiler no life) but anyway fell in love w the dymocks worker person for 2.5 seconds but I’m over it now

1. the second sex by Simone de Beauvoir (thiccc ass book which honestly I’ve already read a fair chunk of in random orders as parts of my studies over the past 3yrs but just in case I’ve missed any bits I’ll be reading the whole hard copy book to waste time ig)

2. eilieen by ottessa moshfegh (idk wot ppl think ab this cos I’m not on booktok or anything anymore due to deleting the app off my phone atm and tbh my year of rest and relaxation while nothing groundbreaking was so me but like the romanticised version I wish I was with a happy ending idk Eileen looks slightly dark which will hopefully get me outta my slump for half a second but also not yet bc I’m sleep deprived atm for silly silly reasons but maybe in the next week or so idk lemme know if you’ve read this one

[gil-estel]

2 and 19? for the books asks

2. Did you reread anything? What?

I did a lot of rereading this year, actually! There were a number of series I enjoyed enough to like. Immediately reread as soon as I finished. I read (and then immediately reread) all the books in The Locked Tomb (Muir, 2019) and The Murderbot Diaries (Wells, 2017) (both of which it's crazy to me that I only read this year????). I also went back and reread The Last Sun (Edwards, 2018) after I finished the rest of the books in the series.

19. Did you use your library?

hoopla + libby my bffs 4eva ❤️❤️❤️

[heyholmesletsgo]

this or that

Tagged by @peridot-tears, thank you!

apple juice or orange juice | breakfast in bed or dinner in a blanket fort | peanut butter or butterscotch | rain or snow | park or mall | guitar or violin | flip flops or sneakers | big cats or bears | ocean or lake | bonfire or picnic | draw or write | oak or mahogany | runecasting or cartomancy | key chains or postcards | iced tea or hot coffee | desktop or laptop | patio or garden | funny quotes or inspirational quotes | hearts or stars | backpack or duffel bag | orchard or ranch | baby bunnies or baby ducks | pastels or earth tones | new york city or los angeles | secret stairs or secret tunnel | street magician or escape artist | the good neighbours or gnomes | comedy or mystery | purple or green | daisies or dandelions | crayon or chalk | sunglasses tinted blue or sunglasses tinted yellow | bracelets or rings | question mark or exclamation point

I tag: @jamiesugah @gimmethehobbit @32variations @silverstark

[jennanydots]

im a huge cats the musical and ds9 fan please tell me everything about the AU

hehehe thank u for enabling me I will do so ! (pls bear in mind that in building this around elecetera I have largely disregarded the canon relationships in ds9 simply because I think it is more fun that way and also I LOVE to talk so this is so god damn long)

this started with the thought that electra and etcetera doing the nojay consortium plot would be unbearably cute, so of course Etcetera is cast as Nog (excitable accidental mischief maker who grows into a brave little champ and joins starfleet!) and Electra is cast as Jake (still silly but much more levelheaded/quieter than her counterpart, a worrier, and grows into a writer! a little reference to my own hc of electra as a library cat).

"why would pollicles steal your homework?" "[head tilt] because they don't have ethics?" PRECIOUS

so then building out from there you get Bombalurina as Benjamin (which I think is REALLY cool also visually I think she suits that part and I think it's such a cool thought to cast her as captain and emissary over anyone else. I love her I'm gay). and then obviously you need Demeter as Kasidy (the obvious choice for dem would be kira but I think this is much more fun for her. hot and in charge cargo ship captain! (and of course this makes her Bomba's gf :3 and Jemima their as-yet-unborn baby who I'm not technically meant to know about cause I haven't finished ds9 yet but hey) aslo. just really super hot. I'm gay. got stuck thinking about int tour dem in kasidy's boiler suit lookin outfits and ceased functioning.). as I mentioned I also cast Munkustrap as Jennifer just cause u know. makes sense. and obvs Deuteronomy as Joseph Sisko! (honestly my favourite characterisation of deut always has that little flavour of grandpa sisko I love him)

then on Etcetera!Nog's side of this family tree we have Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer taking over hybridised roles of Quark and Rom! (neither of them are her parents they're her older siblings/cousins/idk but she's theirs to raise. I've kind of been mixing and matching what narrative roles each of them take so it's sort of a. they run the bar together, jerrie is the one to become an engineer, teazer is the one to date the Leeta, they take bits and pieces of each of the ferengis plots u kno). speaking of, Victoria is cast as Leeta (because victeazer 4eva but also beautiful but kind and deceptively intelligent is literally her. also that shot of cet and vic hugging from 98 but it's rom/leeta stepmom moment Yes). also I love Ishka and originally I cast Jenny as her because YES but now that role goes to Skimbleshanks just for the utter nonsense! (I know moogie's plot is mostly about stuff that can't be reflected to skimble but I'm again thinking more of the relationship to etcetera here and I think this gives the best dynamic! also teazer as the mommas boy and jerrie with the rough relationship Yeah)

this is getting ridiculously long so I'll try to be more brief with the rest! Tugger as Kira (bomba's right hand man!), Mistoffelees as Jadzia (bestie!), Cassandra as Julian (Electra and Cass's roadtrips to disaster!), Asparagus as Worf (look at me and tell me that humour/grumpiness isn't familiar), Alonzo as Odo (elecetera hijinks to cause him to sigh grumpily as Much as possible), Jennyanydots as Miles O'Brien (this one feels kind of out of left field but 1. I love her as cettie's mentor and 2. I would LOVE to see her in the kind of irritated distress obrien lives in. I adore her let me put her in the torture machine just a little), and of couuuuurse Jellylorum as Keiko! (mentor to electra! deeply sweet and caring but also strict and kind and oooooh!), which means Tumble and Pouncival fall into Molly and Kirayoshi's places (makes them even littler than elecetera as revenge for [thing productions do that irritates me that I won't get into here cause we're having fun]), Tantomile and Coricopat as Morn (but instead of silence to the viewers and annoying chatter offscreen it's eerie staring to the viewers and referenced ominious statements they make offscreen. this is deeply funny to me), then Macavity as Dukat obviously (boos and hisses), Grizabella as Lwaxana (beloved), finally Plato as Alexander (my favourite star trek character the ds9 writers Don't understand him like I understand him but this makes so much sense), and Bustopher as the klingon chef!!!!!

this became a very long post!!!! I hope you enjoyed it!!!! please think about electra teaching etcetera to read in secret.

[lianabrooks]

If You Give A Skeleton A 3D Printer

IF YOU GIVE A SKELETON A 3D PRINTER is officially out and in stores near you! You can order the print copy from your local mom n' pop store, request it at the library, or get the ebook. Any way you do it, go grab this silly book about a skeleton who has gone a little bit bananas.

CONTAINS: 💀 Seriously Silly Short Stories 💀 Nonbinary Skeletal Hijinks 💀 Geek Life 4Eva    💀 Reddit Advice 💀 Pudding

Print Ebook Free Review Copy Goodreads

WHAT THE SKELETON DID IN THE DARK (Story #1)

Internet, so helpful!

It took three tries but I broke into the library at night and I’ve been spending all my midnights researching 3D printing material that feels like skin. It’s not great, but I think I can get the squish right.

Let’s see... does Thingiverse have muscles? No? Why not??

Oh, right, I’m the only immortal skeleton wandering around St Louis, probably anywhere. How would I even know? How do you even start that conversation? “Hi, so... are you just an undying skeleton in a suit too?”

I don’t see that going well. Okay... 3D scans of muscles... oddly enough, Google is less helpful here. I’m probably on a watch list now.

3D scans of famous statues... ooo! Do I want to be David or Venus de Milo? Hmmm. What was I when I was alive? I was... alive. Yup, remember that. I think I broke my leg once, pretty sure, there’s a line there that I have to glue up sometimes. I had an actual brain once too, but I guess some things soak into the bones and something don’t.

Maybe I’ll print one of each?

Did you know the David statue was 17 feet tall? I did not.

Venus is 6′8″. Eat your heart out Gwendoline Christie*!

Okay... now... order the stretchable printing filament, I figure I can use the MacGregor’s shed, it has electricity and Mr. MacGregor hasn’t used the workshop since he broke his hip two years ago. Can I use wood glue on my new muscles or do I need to buy a special glue.

Is there bone glue?

Would I be able to get bone glue at the vet’s office?

I hate going to the hospital, it’s always so awkward. I sat down once and wound up hanging in an office for a week before they wheeled me into a place where I could grab something and escape. I still have the eye-loop screw thingy in my head.

Speaking of which, a wig. I need a wig. And makeup. Apparently I’m a girl now.

Right. Do I need boobs?

No, the internet says my secondary sexual characteristics do not determine my gender. Good to know.

Wait, I have boobs. Do I need a bra? ... I’m thinking NO. Bras are expensive.

Okay... muscles, super glue, 3D printer, wig, makeup... clothes? Um... yes. I probably need those. They probably won’t let a naked person into the planning office even if she looks like Venus de Milo (or Gwendoline Christie). Fine. Clothes.

What size am I? Size zero!

Ahahaha! I crack myself up.

I better buy more glue.

There we go. In three weeks I will have a new fleshy mass over my bony self and I can march into the planning office and demand my pond be left alone. My pond will be saved and I can go back to reading whatever falls to the bottom of the pond and sneaking out on Halloween.

They’re putting some new houses up across the road, I should go lay in the dirt with an arrowhead and see if I can get this area declared a piece of historic importance. I wonder if they could do a DNA test to see what I was when I still had skin. That’d be a hoot.

Ah, humans. such fun. But, you know what they say, Si non unum, terrent eos***!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*Gwen, if you read this, don’t be mad. I love you. I watched you in Game Of Thrones through someone’s window**. Let’s be shopping buddies!

** I’m not a creeper, it’s just hard to get people to invite you inside when you’re a skeleton that smells like decayed leaves at the bottom of the lake.

*** If you can’t be one of them, terrify them.

---------------------------- Want more from me? Website Patreon Twitter Facebook Instagram Goodreads Pinterest Buy All My Books Here Buy Me A Ko-Fi Here

[bepoets]

Top 5 tv shows when you were little? top 5 favorite movies when you were little? top 5 favorite books when you were little? (concept of little is up to you)

- top 5 tv shows when I was little I went for like real little like kindergarten and younger.

1. Between the Lions, it was a show on PBS I think? It took place in the New York public library and then like in books it was very educational and holds my entire heart

2. The Many Adventures of Winnie The Pooh. We had the entire series on VHS and I watched them religiously.

3. Sesame Street, forever and always

4. Reading Rainbow, BUTTERFLY IN THE SKY I CAN FLY TWICE AS HIGH TAKE A LOOK ITS IN A BOOK READING RAINBOW. The best theme song Ever in the history of the Universe what a bop I mean damn.

5. Barney because that’s a classic okay it just is. Also the Barney show at universal is the best show they have in both parks Barney 4eva

- top 5 favorite movies when you were little

1. The Adventures of Elmo in Grouchland. This was the first movie I saw in theatres and I had it on VHS and I think eventually we got it on DVD???? We still quote this movie in my household to this day

2. Country Mouse and City Mouse. This may have been a show??? I could not tell you I have no clue but I always thought of them as movies? The Christmas one was the best.

3. State Fair (1945). I was introduced to movie musicals at like birth. This one was my favorite I watched it all the time.

4. The King and I (1956). When I was like 4? My mom would sing shall we dance and she’d pick me up and we’d dance around the living room

5. Bye Bye Birdie (1963). Small child Brooklyn liked Elmo, animated mice, and old fashioned movie musicals and that’s it.

- top 5 favorite books when you were little. I don’t know how many I’ll remember so I will try

1. I had a book about the 12 Dancing Princesses that I loved to death I read it like every night.

2. We had this big giant book that had a collection of Winnie The Pooh Stories and I had every single story MEMORIZED. and they were LONG and my mom and dad when they were tired would try and like summarize or skip pages and I’d call them out on it.

Okay those are the only 2 books I can remember from the small child age range I was going with so it’s those two and nothing else 😂

[marcnutz]

Hold y’alls horses cause here we mcfuckin go

SOOOOOOOO I now know where to place Delta Rune in this whole shebang...

Problem is I have 2 theories. SO ILL POST BOTH SEPERATLY!!

But for now you will get this one, but it’s super spoilery so ill put all the huge details under the cut, but for a tl:dr (of theory 1):

Delta Rune is in an alternate universe where the roles of humans and monsters switched, with humans being banished to the underground and monsters staying above ground. 

Now for the good stuff!!!

(PS I thought of most of this in math class because Logs are boring)

 Yes I know I sound crazy but here me out I have hella evidence. I’ll organize it into subsections about specific details.

Chara/Kris: 

So, in Undertale, as yall should know, Chara is the adopted human child of Asgore and Toriel who “accidentally” almost kills Asgore by poisoning him. In the Genocide route its VERY obvious that Chara has hella problems and is supposedly a true representation of you, the player. Now at the beginning of Delta Rune you are asked what to name your “vessel” then it asks what YOUR name is. And continues to use that name for your save data while in the Darkworld, despite Kris still being called Kris. This further links to this character being YOU and a representation of YOUR soul. Now, Kris is obviously feared, and in Undertale, as Frisk, they aren't so much feared, but more as they NEED to be killed so the monsters can be let free. But in Delta Rune there is FEAR, even the teachers are afraid  them, even the Reindeer girl’s dad (I cant remember her name) talks about how his daughter is afraid of ‘humans under her bed”. It's obvious that the monsters are afraid of Kris, despite this fear not being present in Undertale. Hell, 90% of them want to be their friend from the  get-go. Now, going back to Chara’s… stabby problems. If you’ve played to the end of Delta Rune...… Yeeeeeeeaaaaaahhhh. Kris locks up their soul, signally they feel NOTHING and care for no one, and pulls out a knife, exactly like Chara. 

Kris and Chara are obviously supposed to be the same “character”, because it’s you. And whatever would you go to, Chara will follow 8)

(Also they look the exact same but that's a little obvious) 

Undyne and Alphys:

Here i’ll just be explaining the differences and less of a analysis. 

So, if you go to the library and look on the bulletin board, you see a review for Mew Mew Kissy Cutie 2, and it talks about how amazing it is and how much better it is than Mew Mew 1 and it’s signed by an “Yellow tailed dinosaur”. Now if you remember, in Undertale Alphys writes a review on the underground twitter ranting about how awful Mew Mew 2 is. Now, if Delta Rune were a true sequel, I doubt her mind would change just because she’s on the surface. 

Now, if you talk to Cop Undyne and ask her about Alphys, she has 0 idea who you’re talking about, and if you remember from the end of Undertale pacifist route, Undyne and Alphys are still going strong together, so I highly doubt the broke up. (Delta Rune also hints that Alphys may have a slight crush on Asgore)

Anyways that's all I have on these 2 (#1 OTP 4eva)

Toriel 

So, this part is to prove that it’s not a prequel. In Undertale, Toriel says “I’ve always wanted to be a teacher.” WANTED. Not “I was”, this shows that she wants to be a teacher, but isn't (and wasn’t) one. 

Now in Delta Rune, Toriel IS a teacher, so if it was a prequel, she would have no reason to say “Wanted to be” (And no, it couldn't be from just some forgotten dialog, because if you check Toby Fox’s twitter, you see he’s been working on Delta Rune since before even Undertale came out, so this HAD to be meaningful.

The Delta Rune and Religion

This one is short and sweet, in Undertale, the delta rune is a prophecy, and in Delta Rune, its a religious symbol (comparable to the cross). Now, its entirely possible that it could have been formed into a religion after reaching the above ground, but it’s unlikely, and the only reason I could see this be would be the little fairy thing at the top representing a savior angel (or angel or death).

Also, fun fact: The delta rune symbol at Toriel and Kris’ house has the triangles inverted, with the first and last upside down, and the middle triangle facing up. Idk what this means, but it might come into play during chapter 2.

“This World”

In Undertale, every choice you make matters, that's how the world works, your choices follow you. But in Delta Rune, Susie says at the beginning, “The choices you make in THIS WORLD don’t matter”. This signals that the world in Delta Rune isn't the same one as the one in Undertale. 

Anagrams 

Last point, and the one most people know already. Delta Rune is filled with anagrmas (where you take a world or phrase and make it into a different word or phrase). The most obvious one would be turning Delta Rune into Undertale.  

D E L T A   R U N E

3  4 8 6 7    5 1 2  9

Put those in numeric order and you've got Undertale.

There’s also Ralsei, which is an anagram for Asriel.

R A L S E I

3 1  6 2 5 4

(There’ s probably more, but I just haven't noticed them yet)

This most likely symbolizes how the pieces of the worlds are the same (Monsters, humans, characters, surface, and underground) but its changed into something new.

Wow this took me awhile to write. I may or may not write my other theory sometime this weekend, but this one makes a LOT more sense and I like it a lot better than the other one. 

But we’ll see how this holds up when Chapter 2 comes out. (Hopefully not another 3 years)

[bitterblackberry]

i’ve been re-reading library wars: love & war again!!!! it’s so majorly adorable!!! i read it for the first time when i was like nine & i loved it so much and reread it so many times ahhhhhh its so so good i love it so muchhhh >>

[dillydedalus]

2018 in books, half-time

this is some stuff about books i read so far this year and what i thought of them

also check here for a full list of what i’ve read so far, to be updated.... sometimes... when i think of it

best books so far

published this year: frankenstein in baghdad by ahmed saadawi (4/5*) (english translation at least, it’s originally from 2013 i think). tbh it’s also the only book published this year i read so far but it is really good so.

read this year: my sole 5* books this year so far are andrzej szczypiorski’s the beautiful mrs seidenman (I LOVE THIS BOOK PLS READ IT & PREPARE TO CRY ABOUT THE POLISH RESISTANCE & then talk to me about it. “a joke god tells the world called poland”) and shirley jackson’s we have always lived in the castle which was a reread but it’s perfect so WHATEVER

SOME other favs: exit west, street of crocodiles by bruno schulz, the flamethrowers by rachel kushner, the house of mirth by edith wharton (gerty/lily 4eva), the sea, the sea by iris murdoch

disappointments, just the worst etc.

i uh. REALLY didn’t like little fires everywhere. i didn’t have super-high hopes for it but i thought the topics of a superficially progressive community being confronted with their own racism & trans-racial adoption would be interesting but i found these to be really half-baked and the characters are just insufferable, especially the ones you are supposed to like (they are so SPECIAL and DIFFERENT and TALENTED guys!!!) and mia’s art is pretty cringe.

also, life of pi, which i read for uni, is mostly meh, a bit drawn out and kitschy but the tiger is cool but then at the end it hits you with that smug bullshit about how you prefer the story you just spent 300+ pages with to the one that is told over like. 2.5 pages AND THAT’S WHY YOU SHOULD BELIEVE IN GOD which is like... shut the fuck up yann martel

new releases that i want to read this year

tfw u preorder a book that’s not supposed to be out for another week and amazon forgets and sends it to you immediately anyway: naomi novik’s spinning silver. i adored uprooted with all my heart so my hopes are HIGH #dontletmedown

tommy orange’s there there

the winds of winter. I WANT TO BELIEVE & i will speak it into existence

the merry spinster. i love daniel ortberg and this year seems like a good year for fairy-tale retellings (@self bloody chamber when???)

the monster baru cormorant: in the first book baru did some things that i’m genuinely not sure she (or the book) can come back from so i’m excited (?) to see where this goes

biggest surprises

lmao i kinda expected to hate or at least be really bored with middlemarch because i don’t always vibe with those really long victorian novels. it’s good tho & i love dorothea with all my heart and also rosamond who is The Worst but really awesome at being The Worst

the short synopsis of the sea the sea sounds pretty boring which is why i always kind of avoided it but it is so good and fucking wild! i really didn’t know anything except ‘old theatre dude buys house by the sea & writes his memoirs’ and then every 30 pages the book just throws a curveball at you it’s great

the berlin library system FINALLY getting overdrive so i can read books on my phone at work lmao #bossmakesadollarimakeadime

best short stories

(i like short stories but the collections are usually a bit of a mixed bag so they rarely make it on the favs list)

“the tiger’s bride” by angela carter - see below

“the weirdoes” and “a better place” by ottessa moshfegh (homesick for another world): ottessa moshfegh writes awful, gross and unhinged people really well and these two were my faves

“arabella” by agnes owens: i found the complete collection of her stories to be so bleak and dreary that it got kinda boring but this one is dark-humour gem

“the husband stitch” by carmen maria machado (her body and other parties): i was overall a bit disappointed with this collection (tho i did have really high expectations so the disappointment is relative) but this one is just perfect. cw for BEING A WOMAN WHICH IS AWFUL

“the screwfly solution” by james tiptree jr. (her smoke rose up forever): this story fucked me the fuck up. it’s good but uh cw for.... femicide basically it’s a fun read

resolutions, challenges etc.

goodreads challenge: 53/90 books

my resolutions: read more german books (not going well at all lol), read more books in translation (going okay-ish), graphic novels (doing okay), books set in the MENA region (okay-ish), books set in scotland (not good), general diversity (going really well)

read some of the books.... i already have & have had forever.... instead of buying new books (guess how this is going)

best uni reading “THE TIGER’S BRIDE” BY ANGELA CARTER bc i too want to marry a sexy tigermonster! who doesn’t! exit west is really good too but to be fair i’d already read it before that seminar

themes that kept coming up for some reason

tigers! just tigers everywhere. humanoid tigers that are maybe kinda sexy, tigers on a boat that may be a symbol for blabla SHUT UP YANN JUST LET RICHARD PARKER BE A TIGER WHO DOES TIGER STUFF, to the unseen demonic forces whose name you cannot speak for fear in the sundarbans (the hungry tide) to... i’m sure there’s more tigers & i will take this as a sign that i should get a cat. or two. 

you know that abduction as romance trope video that’s going around right now? guess whose trash ass loves that trope. 

border crossing & that sort of thing. to be fair that’s the topic of one of my seminars but it also happened all the time elsewhere so we’re counting it

[snowbaz-fanfiction-library]

Meet The Admins: Katie

Url: my (dead) main is @goldfishsunglasses and my (sort on) carry on blog is @velvetnoodle

Age: 25!

5 facts about yourself:

my right pupil looks like a keyhole due to a birth defect

i have blue hair

i refuse to drink brown soda of any kind (blech)

i live in texas

i want to be a librarian 

First Fandom? teen titans! starfirexrobin 4eva

When did you start reading/writing fanfiction? i starting reading fic at the tender age of 11 (aaaaall the way back in 2003 x.x) and starting writing in august of 2015 :D

When did you first read Carry On? ahaha funny story i actually bought the audiobook the day the book came out but didn’t listen to it for aaaaages :p and then i finally read the book in august of 2016 and now i’m trash

What is your favorite Carry On quote? “I know I usually come down here to tell you that I’m sorry. But I think today I want to tell you that I’m going to be all right” (Carry On, pg. 501)

What is something you think everyone should do at least once in their lives?

travel on their own!

What could you give a 40 minute presentation on with no preparation?

fandom culture (lord knows i rant about it enough lmao)

Can you do the macarena?

yes! 

i’m so happy to see my library dreams coming true!! when i created this blog back in november i had no idea how amazing it could be and i’m so excited for y’all to see it tomorrow!!

don’t forget to vote here for the au you want us to write! (details)

[resmarted]

we are eight years old when we have our first lovers’ quarrel. for being second graders, we are very darla and alfalfa, sitting together in the sandbox during our recess period because it is considered something for little kids and we are supposed to be too old for it now. we aren’t. it’s the only place we can seem to be alone, and that’s where all the trouble starts. my friends are sick of me trading them out for a girl, and i’m never sure if their jealousy is over you or me, mainly because we are all nerds and it’s weird if anyone even talks to us let alone a girl. we talk about all kinds of stuff though. you tell me what you dreamt of the night before and i dig piles of sand for you to sculpt things out of, and then we discuss what we had for lunch earlier. we don’t eat lunch together, that’s just too much. i sit with my friends and you with yours and we both hang out by the monkey bars with all our other friends at first, but slowly migrate to the sandbox and that’s when the ooh’s and ahh’s and kissy noises start. we think nothing of it at first, but the tension builds over time. one day i can be heard from across the blacktop screaming, no you’re mean! i slam a rock down when i say it in a frustrated angst and sand blows up into your eyes. you start to cry but i drop to my knees like no no, i’m so sorry, stop. i didn’t mean to, i’m so sorry! hold still and look at me and try not to blink. you do begrudgingly and suddenly i am blowing softly into them and asking if it’s helping. it’s too late though and the teacher on yard duty has been alerted, and before we know it both of our parents have been called in and i’m being suspended and have to see a therapist about my anger issues. i keep saying i didn’t hit her, it wasn’t even on purpose, but it doesn’t matter because it was an act of aggression and now i’m a problem child. you’re too scared to say anything because your parents are there and we are all in the principal’s office and the room is swelling up with pressure, everyone’s eyes are on you. i can’t even remember what we fought about, but i think it had to do with how my friends wanted to hang out that day and i figured just this once i could throw them a bone. i’ve barely seen them since our love blossomed from being randomly paired as fingerpainting buddies. ever since we’ve been inseparable and i was just trying to be fair, you know? my parents tell me to leave you alone and yours forbid you to talk to me. the teachers all know now to keep an eye on us and everyone’s watching us now, for real. we stop talking or acknowledging each other, but we deal with it in fucked up ways, like when your friends convinced you act like you were grossed out by me or when mine would suggest i still wasn’t over you and i would respond by acting like you were just another science experiment. we both bottle our feelings up until seventh grade when we are caught holding hands and kissing at a birthday party, which causes a whole new ruckus when you’ve barely recovered from the first one years earlier. by high school you have become a really surly goth girl, nothing like you were with the abercrombie crowd you were once so loyal to. in all the unlikely scenarios to happen, i became somewhat of a jock once i learned to take my aggression out with a baseball bat and eventually football. one day during junior year i get into a fight with my cheerleader girlfriend, someone whose name you once wrote next to friends 4eva on your trapperkeeper in white-out, was supposed to be my ride that day. i hadn’t taken the school bus in years and almost decided to just walk home, but then i saw you get on. something came over me and i jumped in as soon as they were about to shut the doors. you were looking out your window in a daze, music blasting into your ears, and i walk directly to the back to slide in beside you. you don’t even notice me until the bus starts moving and the first thing you do is shoot me a very angry browed stare. i start to say something but you pull your earphones off and just go, what? i try to say how’s it going and you say no i mean what are you doing here? i say there were no other seats, but there are plenty of seats. this bus doesn’t even go anywhere near my house and we both know it. you say something really vicious like the angry little chihuahua you’ve become, something like, i didn’t know your nose could detach this far from kelly’s asshole, and i can only laugh and say that’s a good one. i’m not as smart or as witty as you, i’m actually terrified of you on most days. i ask if your parents still hate me and you scoff like, why do you even care? i care. i have always cared. i’m the worst thing that’s ever happened to you as far as they’re concerned, and you laugh like yeah that makes three of us. i follow you out to your stop and you look at me like i’m a crazy person before calmly walking ahead. and maybe i am a crazy person, this is a crazy person thing to do, i live nowhere near you and was banned from your life years ago. but here i am chasing after you like it’s another game of tag, except i’m following you home, uninvited and unperplexed. i just want to know why you hate me, or that’s what i say anyway. i want to know everything about you and to find a sandbox for us to dig in together and just erase all the bad parts of our impalpable history. i want to see what’s under your black nylons and what your tiny hand with the chipped black nails would look like in my beast paw. you turn around and say that you don’t hate me, in this way like i’m supposed to know. you grasp at your forehead in this frustrated way like you’re trying to explain where babies come from to a child, and these little wisps of bangs fly out from under a black beanie in the process. look i know your dad doesn’t like me and i’m not the wholesome image of the strapping young man that he expects to be in your life but, and you stop me. what? since when do you want to be in my life? ever since you let kelly give you a blowie at the spring formal you two have been inseparable. i look at you like i’m surprised you even know anything about me, and i am. look, i know kelly was your friend, and you let out a loud scream-grunt into the air. the fucked up part is that i only started talking to kelly in hopes it would get me closer to you, that maybe she would bring you up in conversation and give me hints about your life and who you are. all she did was complain and soon the friendship crumbled and after losing all hope i settled for a vapid drama queen that was just someone to kill time with. i can see your black lace bra through your white blouse, and you’ve got this black sweater and these black boots and i want to know why you’ve drained yourself of color but can’t stop staring at the way your mouth moves and how hard your stare is when you rant at me. i don’t even know what you’re saying anymore and the whole world stops when i lean in to kiss you and you grab onto my face, clawing like the little black cat that you are, and kissing me back with a force i have never felt before. you pull back and smack the shit out of me, my face beating red when you go there, is that what you wanted? we’re in a quiet suburb and everyone is inside watch tv when i drop to my knees in the middle of the street and say yes, and a million more, it’s worth every slap to me. you sneak me into your backyard and the garden your mother grew protects us from being seen when i taste you until midnight and your fingernails clench into the soil. you wear your same goth clothes the next day to school but with my letterman jacket and everyone oohs and ahhs. someone makes a shitty comment about how i’m trading a barbie like kelly for dracula’s daughter and i nearly go postal, grabbing him by the collar and slamming him against the nearest locker. i ask him to repeat what he said and he gives me that shit eating grin that i hate so i grab him by the throat. it isn’t until i hear your little voice speak up beside me like, please don’t. and so i don’t. i let him go and walk away, grabbing your hand with proudest posture. we eat lunch together alone and everyone around us gossips about it the same way they’ve done time and time again. i don’t give any fucks. you give a few fucks, but your shyness is slowly replaced with a flirtatious kind of vibrancy. we make out on the steps outside the library, my grabby hands and your thighs, god those thighs. you have been my forbidden lover since the beginning of time now and all i want to do is to feel and squeeze and touch and grab and god don’t go yet, i haven’t even felt up your boobs, your blouse still has all the buttons done. you start going to my games and i go to concerts with you for bands with names like fragile monsters and fully loaded impostors, and we manage to keep it from your parents for an entire year. when they find out, they’re too tired to even be mad about it at this point. in a surprising twist they see you as someone who is adult enough to make her own decisions and there must be something drawing us back together again and again like this. i actually end up becoming friends with your dad, the most sensational part of all. he’s glad that i got you to open up more to color again and i don’t tell him that i actually love when you dress like the craft and that is basically a form of lingerie at this point, because i don’t want to give the guy a heart attack. same goes for when he asks about the scratch mark on my face, i play it off as something that happened at practice but really i just don’t want to be like actually i was eating your daughter’s pussy so good that in a euphoric spasm it made her involuntarily claw half my face off and i fucking loved it. i fucking love you.

[thesaviourblog]

¯\_(ツ)_/¯O N E 🍎 name: Sydney-Anne nickname: Siddles, Squid, Syd (I hate that one) zodiac sign: Leo height: 5'11 orientation: hetero ethnicity: Irish/English (actually born there- why do Americans insist on saying they're German/Irish/whatever Americans when it's like their....great great grandfather who was born there?) favorite fruit: Mandarins favorite season: Winter favorite book: Handmaids Tale (Margaret Atwood) Kingmaker Trilogy (Toby Clements) favorite flower: Anything small and simple favorite scent: bleach (I'm a freak) favorite animal: Dolphins coffee, tea, or hot cocoa? None. I only drink water. average hours of sleep: 5 cats or dogs: Doggos favorite fictional character(s): Probably Emma Swan just because she's also a foster kid. Or Katherine Beckett because she always inspired me to kick ass. dream trip: Back home to Ireland. when was your blog created? Hmmmm idk what do you post about? RP and CS do you get asks on a regular basis? Actually, yes- I just don't get around to answering most of them. aesthetic: lol no favorite band/artist: Miley, Celine Dion 4eva fictional characters I’d date: Killian Jones, Cooper Freedman. Hogwarts house: Hufflepuff T W O 🍏 countries I’ve lived in: NZ, Ireland, England, USA favorite fandom: Honestly, most fandoms are ugh....but the Private Practice one was always good when it was thriving. languages you speak: English, French, Maori favorite film of 2016: Room last article you read: Why the internet is frothing over 2017 Steve Carrell shuffle your music library and put your first three songs here: It's all going to be Celine last thing you bought online: Law and Order SVU how would your friends describe you? (Just text my friend for this) Giving, humble, hard working, funny, confident, wise (bff OMG) how would your enemies describe you? Annoying for sure who would you take a bullet for? Anyone TBH tagged by: myself Tagging: @jollyrogerjones @storybrookecygnet

[anebebebooks]

Rani Patel In Full Effect

Sonia Patel

2017 William C. Morris Award Finalist

Almost seventeen, Rani Patel appears to be a kick-ass Indian girl breaking cultural norms as a hip-hop performer in full effect. But in truth, she's a nerdy flat-chested nobody who lives with her Gujarati immigrant parents on the remote Hawaiian island of Moloka'i, isolated from her high school peers by the unsettling norms of Indian culture where "husband is God." Her parents' traditionally arranged marriage is a sham. Her dad turns to her for all his needs—even the intimate ones. When Rani catches him two-timing with a woman barely older than herself, she feels like a widow and, like widows in India are often made to do, she shaves off her hair. Her sexy bald head and hard-driving rhyming skills attract the attention of Mark, the hot older customer who frequents her parents' store and is closer in age to her dad than to her. Mark makes the moves on her and Rani goes with it. He leads Rani into 4eva Flowin', an underground hip hop crew—and into other things she's never done. Rani ignores the red flags. Her naive choices look like they will undo her but ultimately give her the chance to discover her strengths and restore the things she thought she'd lost, including her mother.

Sonia Patel is a psychiatrist who works with children and adults. She was trained at Stanford University and the University of Hawaii. She lives and practices in Hawaii. Rani Patel In Full Effect is her first young adult novel. BookExpo America Editor's Buzz Selection 2016 Kirkus Reviews Best Teen Books 2016 New York Public Library 50 Best Teen Books 2016 Book Page Top 10 Best Teen Book 2016 Texas Library Associations Top 10 Teen Books 2017 Multnomah County Library Best Books 2016 The Volumes Bookcafe Staff's Best 20 of 2016 2017 Amelia Bloomer List Recommended Feminist Literature For Birth Through 18