#like 21 and 32 are just. an insane difference in age in particular ways

[rotzaprachim]

new possible aspect of extended andor-erso family Dynamics include galen and lyra’s protracted awkward divorce (it starts to happen the moment that jyn is out of the house, either age, like, 6 or 18 you can decide) where galen for whom she’s like he only real human connection to the Outside World is like *this is Fine* *opens vodka bottle* meanwhile lyra keeps talking about living her Best Life. she’s actually finishing her geology master’s degree that got put on pause by galen, galen’s career, and jyn. she’s invested in a bunch of new-age hippy sweaters and scented candles and taken up hot yoga. she’s got the space!joy of sex and assorted manuals on the female orgasm sitting up on the bookshelf with all her baking books. she goes hillwalking for weeks at a time. she keeps bringing her collection of nubile younger lovers ‘round to family events and they are all her age or younger, which is to say, at least eleven years younger than galen 

[its-sixxers]

For the character ask. Multiples of 7 for Charmer or Multiples of 8 for Courier 6 or both if you’re feeling up to it.

Poppin’ this baby under a read more cuz I’m doing BOTH

Eleanora / Nora / “Charmer” / Sole Survivor

07. Is there a catchphrase or sound that they tend to make a lot (likely without being aware of it)? 

She does a weird little hum when she sighs a lot, and makes little noises when she hops over things and down to the ground and just... most physical things. She’s able to cut it out when sneaking about, at least.14. Do they live alone or with family? How do they feel about their family/roommates? 

Charmer surrounds herself with people - she and Deacon set up shop in Mercer safehouse (Hangman’s Alley), the apartment buildings on either side of which end up filling up with settlers and former Railroad agents after the Institute falls. Deacon and Shaun are her family that live in her apartment, though often some of the old guard (Desdemona, Drummer Boy, Tinker Tom, the Courier, Preston, Piper and Nat) come and stay over.She loves it. The people are what make the Commonwealth bearable for her, and she’s happy to have such a sense of safety and familiarity around them.21. What is one of your character’s biggest fears? How would they react when dealing with this fear? (Answered this in a different early ask prompt, but changing it a bit to reflect her post-game).Being alone. Well and truly alone. It’s what she had to deal with for the brief time she was out of the vault before coming across Dogmeat, and it’s the worst experience she could imagine. Having company and friends is the only thing that makes what happened to her bearable. If she was a born wastelander it might be fine, but the knowledge of what was and the great weight of what was lost with the war means that every day spent post-War is a challenge. Having to deal with it without a support structure would probably make her a pretty jaded and shitty person. If by some horrible happenstance she lost everyone she cared about? She’d lose it. Would probably end up Boone-tier for the death wish thing, except without the combat aptitude. Wouldn’t last long.28. If your character became a celebrity, what would they be famous for? 

Pre-War, probably winning an insane legal case. Post-War, taking out the Institute’s a pretty big achievement but most of her fame’s just from helping people out and word of mouth spreading.35. Is your character afraid of death? If they got to choose how to die, how would they want to go? She fears it a little in that it’s unknown and she also fears whatever pain may be included. As a parent and a partner, she’s also scared of what will happen to the people depending on her when she’s gone. If she got to choose, old age all the way, failing that, some way in which she could say goodbye and give people some closure, say the things that she still had to say.42. Is there anything in your character’s past that they regret, haunts them, or they wish they could change? Sometimes she wonders what would have happened if she never signed up for the Vault, if she, Nate and Shaun could survive in a world right after the bombs dropped. She thinks they could - knowing how she adapted to the Commonwealth and Nate’s military experience, if the radiation didn’t get them they’d make it.It’s a thought that bothers her on occasion, though she tries not to dwell on it as it’s something she can’t change and her life ended up turning out decently given the circumstances.49. (Done in a previous ask!)

Carmen / Courier Six08. (Answered in a previous ask!)16. Is your character the athletic type or more of a couch potato? What are some sports/games that they like?

Girl loves to keep moving, definitely the athletic type. Shooting contests, hiking, climbing, running - most things outdoorsy she enjoys. In a time before the War she’d probably be absolutely killer at baseball - she’s got a good eye and can run. 24. In their own words, how would your character describe what their lover is like?

Glory: “Someone told me once that the flame that burns twice as bright burns half as long. That was her. She wasn’t a light, she was like fire - whatever she set her mind to she’d take down, and she’d warm you just by being near. Felt like I could take on anything as long as she was there. Too bright for this fucking world, turns out.”

Boone: “The man’s like Lake Mead. Still waters, placid, boring on the surface - but those waters run deep. And cold. Have to throw a stone to make any waves, but a delicate hand can skip it. The few moments I saw the man in those depths were enough to ruin me. I don’t know if that man can exist anymore, but god, I thought it was worth trying to see.”

32. If your character’s lover offered to take them out on a dream date, what would they want to do?

Carmen’s a simple woman. With the right person, a night under the stars and some good sex is really all she needs. She hasn’t gotten it, so something that simple is almost mythologized in her mind.

40. Does your OC have any guilty pleasures they enjoy? Hobbies, past times, music, etc that they wouldn’t want known by others? 

She has a book of poetry by Keats that’s only half burned. Arcade gave it to her when she mentioned wishing she could use words as well as he did. Most literature from the Romantic movement appeals to her - the focus on nature and the spiritual resonates. It’s personal and something she doesn’t like to talk about or would think understand properly, so she keeps it quiet.48. Is there anything in particular that would ignite your character’s jealousy? Or does your character not get envious? It’s a little difficult to make the Courier jealous, since the people she looks for romantically are people that aren’t major flirts - or if they are, it’s targeted toward their partner and no one else. If her partner was actively trying to make her jealous, however, they’d just have to go after people who have what she lacks. Innocence, idealism, softness. Playing on her insecurities is the best way to fire her up. She desperately wishes she could be someone who wasn’t so fucked up, but life’s a bitch.Get to Know My Character asks

[nathanneedsausername]

2018 Film Retrospective

This is my retrospective of all the movies I saw in 2018. This is based on UK release dates so films such as The Favourite, Vice or Eighth Grade will not appear on this list despite technically being 2018 movies as I have not yet been able to see these yet. There are also many movies that I have missed in 2018.

I will still be updating this list throughout 2019 here: https://letterboxd.com/nathan_r_l/list/2018-from-best-to-worst-3/

If you want to see where these movies fall on this list as I see them.

So, anyway here from the worst of the year to my personal favourite are all the films I saw in 2018:

 37. The Queen and I (Dan Zeff):

I only saw this film a few days ago as of writing so it may seem a little harsh to call it the worst of the year as it hasn’t had any time to grow on me yet. Although I don’t see this getting any better with age. Sky intended this new David Walliams’s TV movie as a sort of Christmas present, but this must be one of the very few films I have ever seen that has actually made me angry. Nothing more than royalist propaganda that manages to completely miss the potential of the concept as well as missing the point of the sequence from Les Miserable that it decides to “pay homage too”.

36. Death on the Tyne (Ed Bye):

Not much to say here. Really it isn’t a surprise that UKTV made a bad comedy.

35. Fahrenheit 451 (Ramin Bahrani):

I promise that I saw more than just TV movies this year, it just so happens that most of them were really bad. All of the changes that were added to the story were stupid and when they actually tell the story it is painfully boring.

34. Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (J. A. Bayona):

Let’s be real, despite ranging in quality none of the Jurassic Park sequels have warranted their own existence. That being said Fallen Kingdom might be worth watching just to see how hilariously bad these films can get. Despite having the same director as The Orphanage and A Monster Calls no amount of good tracking shots can fix a script that is this ridiculous. The script comes across like two different ideas for new Jurassic Park movies were awkwardly stitched together when the best treatment for both would have been not to make either of them. Through in an incredibly stupid and unneeded twist and the most underwhelming Jeff Goldblum cameo in cinema history.

33. Grandpa’s Great Escape (Elliot Hegarty):

Oh, look another bad TV movie. Davis Walliams consistently finds himself attached to these boring BBC productions never quite capture the heart and care of his writing. Walliams is a good children’s author, but the small screen adaptations of his work always feel rushed and unfocused.

32. Venom (Ruben Fleischer):

The biggest disappointment of 2018. Venom is corny, bland and forgettable. According to IMDB, Zombieland director Ruben Fleischer is behind this mess but judging by Tom Hardy’s performance and the incomprehensible CGI finale no-one directed this.

31. Solo: A Star Wars Story (Ron Howard):

A soulless, lifeless film that stinks of studio interference. All of the cast feel as if they are just playing the type of character they are expected to (especially  Phoebe Waller-Bridge as L3-37). There are moments in this film where it feels like there is supposed to be a joke that has awkwardly been edited or written out after Lord and Miller left the project, these moments haunt the film and make me feel like this could have been great, but alas. 

30. Death Wish (Eli Roth):

At this point it might be time to consider that Eli Roth might be making bad movies on purpose. I went into Death Wish expecting something needlessly graphic and entertainingly violent and stupid but that’s not what this is. For the most part the gun violence in this film is pretty tame and the dialogue is far to generic and boring to be funny. There is one scene in a garage that showcases what usually makes Roth’s films memorable, but it comes too late to bring this movie into guilty pleasure territory. I do believe that Roth is a good filmmaker but the more he releases these mindless, generic thrillers the harder it is to defend him.

29. The Meg (Jon Turteltaub):

Half of this movie is a self-aware special effects movie that is genuinely entertaining. The other half is a boring and cliché. It should be good but never quite manages to keep up any momentum that it builds.

28. Tomb Raider (Roar Uthaug):

Technically better than the 2001 Lara Croft film although I know which one I would rather watch. Some interesting set pieces and homages to the newer tomb Raider games mixed with bland dialogue and an uninteresting plot.

27. Deadpool 2 (David Leitch):

Not as funny as the first movie but has better action. Deadpool 2 is mixed bag, the satire falls short when the movie insists on upping the stakes and having its audience feel emotionally connected to the story. David Leitch is a good action director and I look forward to seeing what he does next, but I can’t say that I’m all to exited about the next instalments in the Deadpool franchise.

26. Tag (Jeff Tomsic):

I don’t think that this film deserves the hate it seems to have gotten. Tag is a pretty funny movie with memorable characters and good camera work. It’s a little corny and the ending gets way to soppy but it’s a good film to watch with a group of friends if not just for some good Hannibal Buress quotes.

25. Click & Collect (Ben Palmer):

Hey, a TV movie that didn’t suck! Airing on BBC 1 on Christmas Eve this is an example of cringe comedy done well, the plot doesn’t always make sense but that doesn’t stop the comedy from really working.

24. Outlaw King (David Mackenzie):

A pretty good historical drama about Robert the Bruce. That’s all this is really a serviceable movie about an interesting topic. Not bad by any means all though a little forgettable, the performances and fight choreography are great but the writing lacks any real direction.

23. Aquaman (James Wan):

A list of other movies scenes from Aquaman made me think of:

Ratatouille

Splash

Raiders of the Lost Arc

Lara Croft: Tomb Raider

Black Panther

Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace

Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring

Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

How to Train Your Dragon 2

Wonder Woman

Full review coming next

22. Ant-Man and the Wasp (Peyton Reed):

Not as funny or engaging as 2015’s Ant-Man. This is a decent blockbuster with some good special effects and funny moments. A lower tier Marvel film for sure that gets completely overshadowed by the other two movies that the studio brought out in 2018 but still a fun watch.

21. Ocean’s Eight (Gary Ross):

About as good as Ocean’s 13. All of the hallmarks of the Ocean’s trilogy are present. The last 15 minuets begin to over explain what we have already seen and the name of the movie spoils and reveal at the end of the movie. A well-directed heist movie none-the-less that should be enjoyable for any Ocean’s fan

20. Ready Player One (Steven Spielberg):

This movie is at its best when it is at its most Spielberg. There is a really great car chase and a plot that revolves around kids standing against authority. It goes on for way to long and some of the references are on the nose. It certainly needs to be cut down but it’s a movie worth seeing if you know your pop-culture.

19. Searching (Aneesh Chaganty):

By far the best example of found-footage to be released in years. Having the entire film appear from the perspective of computer screens and phone calls makes the experience feel far more real and personal as if you are right there figuring out the mystery with the character. The story itself separated from its gimmick has been seen before and the twist is a bit of a reach but with its unique style it feels completely fresh. If you hated Unfriended there is a high chance that you will love this.

18. My Dinner with Hervé (Sacha Gervasi):

A HBO movie featuring a fantastic performance from Peter Dinklage. The life story of French actor Hervé Villechaize is told through a crazy interview based on the one that the actor had with the director in the early 90’s. It’s a small film but one that has been made with a lot of passion from its director and star. Absolutely look this one out if you can.

17. Isle of Dogs (Wes Anderson):

Wes Anderson is responsible for some of my favourite films of all time. While his latest may not be his best work to date it is a beautiful and insanely well-crafted film full of life and wonder. Anderson has a particular style and this movie sums up exactly what makes that style work so well with every shot working perfectly.

16. Black Mirror: Bandersnatch (David Slade):

It’s hard to tell at this point whether or not this will start a new craze for choose your own adventure movies the way that Avatar started a craze for 3D. Honestly I don’t think Charlie Brooker has left anywhere to really be explored with the this concept as he dives head first into a meta-narrative all about free-will. Certainly, an ambitious endeavour for the crew of Black Mirror that has taken over the cinematic discussion for a little while. I saw this with a group of friends trying to uncover as much of the story as we could in one sitting and I highly recommend that experience if you haven’t seen/played this yet.

15. Black Panther (Ryan Coogler): 

A Marvel movie that appears to have nudged its way into Oscar conversations, regardless of whether or not I think that it deserves that acclaim this is a great film. Black Panther has some of the smartest writing of any MCU movie and one of the best villains to ever appear in a superhero movie. This is a film that will be talked about for years because of what it means for representation, it also helps that it is a really good movie.

14. Game Night (John Francis, Jonathan M. Goldstein):

The biggest surprise of the year is that the two guys behind 2015’s awful Vacation reboot managed to make one of the funniest and well-made comedies of 2018. The camerawork in this film is brilliant, one long take in particular has to be one of my favourite scenes of the year. The plot takes some logical jumps but who cares when the film is this good.

13. A Quiet Place (John Kransinski):

Sure, it doesn’t all make sense when you analyse it but watching A Quiet Place on the big screen is one of the tensest experiences I have ever had. When the credits rolled after the first time I saw this film I noticed that for the past 90 minuets, that’s the sign of some effective tension.

12. First Man (Damien Chazelle):

Chazelle has proven himself to be one of the best directors working today. While I may not love his latest as much as his previous work on La La Land and Whiplash it has to be said that First Man is a solid base hit for a great filmmaker. The third act of this film features some of the best special effects of the year mixed with one of the most emotional sequences of the year. Gosling and Foy are both brilliant and both deserve nominations as does Chazelle.

11. Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri (Martin McDonagh):

Slightly twisted and very enjoyable Three Billboards is a strange film. McDonagh is able to find humour in the darkest of places but never undermines the serious nature of the subject matter.

10. Incredibles 2 (Brad Bird):

Going into the top 10 it feels important to restate that these rankings are based purely on my own personal opinions on each film. Incredibles 2 is objectively not as good as the 2004 original, but it doesn’t have to be, this is a very fun movie featuring some great animation, fantastically directed action sequences that only Brad Bird could pull off and do I even have to mention the Jack-Jack scenes? Brad Bird is one of the greatest filmmakers to ever work in animation and this feels like his victory lap, not his best film but absolutely one that showcases just how great he is.

9. The Shape of Water (Guillermo del Toro):

Best picture winner, The Shape of Water deserves all the acclaim that it has gotten. This “adult fairy-tale” features a wonderful score, fantastic performances, beautiful set-design and characteristically excellent direction from one of the world’s greatest directors! Everyone has already lumped praise on this film and so I am not left with too much else to say other than see this film.

8. The Zen Diaries of Garry Shandling (Judd Apatow):

I hear that 2018 was a great year for documentaries, I wouldn't know because I only saw this one but if Three Identical Strangers and Won’t you be my Neighbour are better than this then I need to see them. Judd Apatow looks into the life of his friend and fellow comedian Garry Shandling only 2 years after his tragic death. His approach leaves no stone unturned as he dives head first into the late comedian’s mind using his own diaries and interviews with his closest friends and collaborators. As a stand-up comedy fan it is absolutely fascinating to get a look the real life of an often misunderstood legend like Shandling for it to be as neatly put together and wonderfully entertaining as this is a welcome bonus.

7. Avengers: Infinity War (Joe Russo, Anthony Russo):

For the technical achievement alone Infinity War deserves a place in my top 10. The Russo brothers managed to pull off a stunt that just a year ago I was ready to call impossible, bringing together 10 years worth of character arcs and plot points while still making an enjoyable film. Even though it has been 9 months I still don’t know what to say about this film and my lack of words may be the best compliment I can give it.

6. Mission: Impossible – Fallout (Christopher McQuarrie):

If you asked me in June I would have said that the Mission: Impossible franchise had peaked with Brad Bird’s Ghost Protocol in 2014, I also would have been dead wrong. Fallout is not just the best film in the franchise but an absolute high point in action cinema. Seeing this on the big screen was one of the most visceral and intense movie going experiences I have ever had, every stunt is a nail-biter and the whole time I was on the edge of my seat.   

5. Thoroughbreds (Cory Finley):

This is the movie that I saw alone and have yet to properly have a conversation with someone about. This film slipped under almost everyone’s radar and then disappeared. I am telling you now find this movie it is a fantastic, quaint little film with the power to make you uncomfortable and make you laugh at the same time. Olivia Cooke and Anya Taylor Joy are both brilliant and the ending has one of my best moments of the year with a single long shot and the power of suggestion. If you missed it, which you probably did, go look it out. 

4. BlacKkKlansman (Spike Lee):

Loud, funny, unapologetic, stylish and controversial. Those are the five words that describe all of Spike Lee’s best movies and BlacKkKlansman is no exception. With multiple Oscar worthy performances, a great score and a screenplay that shows Spike at his angriest and smartest in a long time, this film will get under some peoples skin, as great cinema should. 

3. I, Toyna (Craig Gillespie):

Every now and then a movie comes along that perfectly sums up why I love this art form, I Tonya is one of those movies. Deeply impactfull on an emotional level while remaining hyper stylised, Gillespie manages to make the audience feel sympathy for characters that would be the villains in any other story by taking you on an emotional roller coaster through the life of Tonya Harding that leaves the viewer feeling just as broken as the titular character by the conclusion.

This film is so good I watched it twice in two days.

2. Lady Bird (Greta Gerwig):

I fell hard for this film. Greta Gerwig’s painfully honest look at growing up feels like watching a selection of incredibly well shot home movies from a real person. The real achievement of Gerwig’s directorial debut is how it manages to feel relatable even if you aren’t in the same situation as the protagonist. When the credits role it’s hard to feel slightly disappointed that you can’t keep watching what is going to happen to this character next and when the only criticism you have is that you didn't want it to end, the film must have been pretty good.

1. Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse (Bob Persichetti, Peter Ramsey, Rodney Rothman):

I’m just as surprised as you are.

Somehow and for whatever reason this is the movie that resonated with me the most in 2018, this is the film I see myself going back to the most. Sometimes the best film is the most entertaining one, this film had me hooked instantly and kept me in a near trance-like state during its run-time. In don’t have anything to profound to say about this film it’s just really a great film that everyone can enjoy. If this is still playing near you and you haven’t seen it yet, go check it out you won’t be disappointed.

[deadcactuswalking]

REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 10th February 2019

Nothing happened, at all.

Top 10

For its third week, Ariana Grande is at the top spot of the UK Singles Chart with her single “7 rings”, from the recently released thank u, next album – which I personally think was pretty mediocre. Regardless, I don’t see this going anywhere, especially since nothing happened.

“Sweet but Psycho” is staying still, with Ava Max’s song still at number-two.

Similarly at number-three, “Dancing with a Stranger” by Sam Smith and Normani doesn’t move from last week.

Neither does Calvin Harris’ and Rag ‘n’ Bone Man’s “Giant” for that matter at number-four.

Finally, some movement – up two spots is Mabel’s “Don’t Call Me Up”, at number-five.

This means “Wow.” by Post Malone is down a spot to number-six.

Now, our first new arrival, as Billie Eilish debuts at number-seven with “bury a friend”, becoming her first top 10 hit in the UK, and her second Top 40. We’ll talk more about it later, but I’m impressed by how she’s been able to debut this high; definitely shows that new album will do big numbers.

“Nothing Breaks Like a Heart” by Mark Ronson and Miley Cyrus falls down two spaces to number-eight.

At number-nine, up a spot from last week is Lewis Capaldi’s “Someone You Loved”

Also down two spaces is Post Malone and Swae Lee’s Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse soundtrack cut, “Sunflower”, now at #10, slowly making its way off the charts.

FEATURED SINGLE: “Kids Turned Out Fine” – A$AP Rocky

Now, to interrupt your regularly scheduled programming is Featured Single, the segment where we look at a great song that is getting a single push of some kind but isn’t charting and spread some light on it briefly. Now this song in particular just got a really high-budget music video that combined some of its elements with Rocky’s other song “Changes”, which is all flashy but otherwise kind of unremarkable – but the song itself is great. There’s a catchy, psychedelic guitar sample that starts it all off, showered by scattered vocal samples and seemingly field recordings of playgrounds, before it switches to a slick trap beat that Rocky croons over, before everything slowly gets pitched down and slowed down as he mentions the drugs on his mind as a teenager, who is curious about venturing into substance use without caring about the consequences, and man, does it feel like it. This is psychedelic and confusing, once Rocky starts spitting and the bass actually appears, it just kind of explodes with only distorted guitar to accompany it, before a couple random “Yeah! Yeah!” ad-libs that cut it back to the beat as it was, and the verse continues normally as if nothing happened. Yeah, the album this is from, TESTING, is kind of like that, all of the time. Some of my favourite songs are trippy, chaotic messes, with moments like that random Diddy skit on “Tony Tone” about how he said something while her kids were listening that was vulgar, I suppose, that just cuts the song entirely and the transitions aren’t smooth, it’s just a miniscule interlude that takes place for no reason other than experimentation, and honestly despite lacking substance (Ironically), I love this song (Even though it is just vibe and nothing else, really) and how smooth it is in its controlled chaos, definitely one of the calmer moments on TESTING, but I can never see it being a hit, ever, despite how nothing happened. I think “Brotha Man” with French Montana, Snoop Dogg and Frank Ocean could have a better chance, perhaps “OG Beeper” with BlocBoy JB at a stretch. So let’s just get to the Climbers, Fallers and such.

Climbers

Did I mention nothing happened? This week was so dry and slow that Pinkfong rebounded with “Baby Shark”, up another five spaces to #19. That’s sad. It is alongside Kehlani and Ty Dolla $ign though, as “Nights Like This” is up 10 spaces from last week to #30, which is good because this is a pretty great song from two great artists, one of which I’m pretty sure is also serving 15 years in prison for cocaine possession. Yeah, okay, let’s get to the fallers.

Fallers

Now there’s a couple more here, to an extent. As expected, J. Cole’s “MIDDLE CHILD” is down five spaces to #14 – without a music video I don’t think this is a great lead single, sorry, Cole, I am excited for your next album but this song’s pretty boring. “Lost in the Fire” by Gesaffelstein and the Weeknd is down five spaces to #24, next to former #1 “thank u, next” by Ariana Grande down six spaces to #28 (This will rebound though, the album’s out now), while “18HUNNA” by Headie One and Dave is down nine spaces to #32. That’s it, though.

Dropouts

“Baby” by Clean Bandit, Marina and Luis Fonsi is out from #29 (That’s been kind of a flop overall, I’m just surprised it lasted this long), while other than that, we have “Comfortable” by Yungen and Dappy out from #32, “Think About Us” by Little Mix featuring Ty Dolla $ign out from #34 and 15 years in prison for cocaine possession, “Psych Out!” by AJ Tracey out from #36 (I guess the album didn’t do all too well?), “Mo Bamba” by Sheck Wes out from #37, and surprisingly due to recent circumstances, “Advice” by Cadet and Deno Driz out from #39. Rest in peace to Cadet – tragic he died so young in a car accident, and just in his prime time to release more material, sucks that his life was cut short at this point in time, and we only have limited music from the guy, he was only 25. On a lighter note:

Returning Entries

Actually, this isn’t a lighter note at all, this song sucks. “Grace” by Lewis Capaldi is back at #40 (Who cares?). Maybe the new arrivals will be better, there’s four of them so there’s got to be something good there.

NEW ARRIVALS

#39 – “i’m so tired...” – LAUV and Troye Sivan

So, uh, LAUV’s back with another song, huh? I thought he’d end up a complete one-hit wonder but I suppose he’s attempting that second hit, and you know what, I’m not complaining, I loved his last one (More on that when I post my best list; it’s concerningly high). Troye Sivan is okay, I guess, none of his stuff except perhaps “My My My!” has really grown on me all too much though. Sigh, what do these boring pop dudes have to say? That they’re sick of love songs? That all these fairy tales are full of it? That if they hear one more stupid love song, they’ll be sick? That they’re at a payphone trying to call home? Yeah, alright, enough playing around. This is LAUV’s first ever Top 40 hit in the UK (Congratulations) and Troye Sivan’s fourth, and is it good? Well, I can agree with the title’s message on the surface, I guess. Not that I’m tired of love songs, I’m just tired. The song itself? I mean, it is generic, but it’s quicker-paced than his last hit, and it seems to have some more energy, but that guitar strumming just kind of gets on my nerves, same with that mind-numbingly repetitive hook. There is a lot of genuine groove in the production though, especially the janky percussion, and Troye Sivan’s melodies are sonically sound. I can see this growing on me like LAUV has succeeded in before, but I could equally see myself hating this after hearing it more than five times (Because you know the radio will play the most bottom of the barrel stuff after the rise of trap-rap). It’s okay, I guess. Next.

#36 – “a lot” – 21 Savage featuring J. Cole

It’s about time this appeared, and I know exactly why. Back in late December, 21 Savage dropped his album as pretty much a Christmas present, with i am > i was being slightly inconsistent but there’s still a lot of quality there, and fun to be had, especially with the powerful opening track. Now that there’s a music video and now that 21 Savage has been detained by ICE for overstaying his Visa (Apparently he’s actually from the UK, but he’s been freed now), I can only see this rising from now on, and that’s good because it was going to be my Featured Single for this week if it didn’t appear. This song is fantastic, all three versions of it. It starts with a few different 21 Savages just repeating ad-libs while that great soul sample croons in the background of the trap skitters, “I love you for so many reasons, I love you for all seasons”. The bass hits behind 21’s insanely catchy hook with that multi-tracked, “A lot” playing after every line, until 21’s verse, which gets fittingly, broken down, for an unidentified sample to repeat, “I break it on down”, with random vocal samples and sound effects playing in between. While 21’s meaningful subject matter is arguably more important, and the section is totally filler, I love those little touches that show the layers of the production. 21 is essentially playing the underdog who’s seen and been through traumatic gang violence and experiences with women, who has still succeeded. But then you hear J. Cole drunkenly and tiredly say, “Yeah”, before going on a ramble about how 21 Savage had his kids in the studio or something, I don’t know, and then he goes off.

Some n****s make millions, other n****s make memes

Yeah, it may seem like I hate J. Cole’s guts from how all his charting stuff is really boring and always gets negative reviews from me, but he’s definitely one of the best rappers out when he really wants to bother. This whole verse is essentially a complete ramble, but he did warn us, although he does keep a general theme in his rapid flow and charismatic yet calm delivery, which is how the new-wave rappers and overall new-wave black society in the modern Internet age should have more guidance, and now that the older legends in that society are getting older and more mature, much like 21, he feels they should have more responsibility and that he feels bad for the even newer, younger wave of SoundCloud rappers who will regret all their decisions, including 6ix9ine, who I may add he doesn’t defend – he just feels bad for him as he knows at some point, Tekashi’s going to look back at what he did and ask himself, “Was it worth it getting myself into prison for essentially life?” I wonder if Ty Dolla $ign is thinking that while he’s serving 15 years for cocaine possession. 21’s alternate verse on the physical, live and music video versions also discusses people getting blocked at the border, and that families in ghettos still don’t even seem to have a right to clean water and are constantly stuck in financial situations and struggles with no way to escape, and it honestly seems like an anthem for 21, who’s gone through all this, with his verses combined probably being better than Cole’s, honestly. This song is like six minutes (At least the best version of the song is) so I’m surprised it’s gone this far, but it deserves it. Check this out if you haven’t already.

#15 – “All I Ever Wanted” – Fredo featuring Dave

Now, back to some British stuff. Fredo and Dave are close friends, and honestly the chocolate frog and its mundanely-named partner are people I initially was just confused by, and you can tell during my review of “Funky Friday” months ago, which is a song I know oddly admire and adore for all its odd quirks. I didn’t think it was anything special at the time, but it’s slowly become one of my favourite songs of the past year. After listening to more stuff, though, as more from both has crept up on the charts, I’ve started to love them both, and seeing as this is the only song to enter the top 40 from the three Fredo album tracks entering on the top 100 this week from his album Third Avenue (That I’ll check out immediately after this episode), this is of course the one that left the most impressions on listeners. I’m really into British rap, especially the trap and the more low-key, soul and R&B stuff (Check out Tom Misch, he has some beautiful songs like “Good to be Home” and “Movie”, in fact the Free Form official Spotify playlist has some fantastic British hip hop, listen to some of it if you can and give these guys support), so hopefully this’ll be good, and, yeah, it is. It starts with a glittering piano and twinkling leads that are cheap but definitely symphonic and almost video game-like, with producer tags ham-fistedly appearing as the bass slowly creeps ominously. In fact, the whole song is really ominous as even when the hi-hats come in, there’s no real bounce and Fredo just yells at us. It’s pretty intimidating, and when the beat finally drops, we have that classic stock “Oh!” sound you hear in songs like “Leave Me Alone” by Flipp Dinero, “Dilemma” by Nelly and “3500” by Travis Scott, but here it has so much reverb that any other voice than Fredo’s troubled gang mindset feels distant. Dave is great here, referencing... Lil Baby of all people, with a more stable and serious flow, mentioning the people close to him who he’s lost to both prison and death, in a really long and fantastic verse. The emotionless vibe of this track makes it so much more full of emotion, and although it sounds slightly dated in its production, this is a dark and menacing yet almost sombre banger, pretty similar to one of Dave’s other songs, “Hangman”, and definitely deserves to be Dave’s sixth top 40 hit and Fredo’s fourth.

#7 – “bury a friend” – Billie Eilish

I’ve heard two other songs from Billie Eilish in full, and I love both of them; “when the party’s over” is a genius piece of songwriting from her brother Finneas, and “lovely” is a beautiful ballad with Khalid. Those were slow, minimalistic piano-lead songs, though, so what happens when she lends her voice to, uh... industrial funk? Yeah, this one is bouncier and this one is more danceable, and that’s why it debuted this high, especially with Eilish’s hype at an all time high right now, not because some British rapper cameos in literally less than one second at the start of the song. His name is Crooks, and I figured he would have an uncredited rap verse when I saw it had additional vocals from him,  but it’s literally just him whispering, “Billie”, and a couple ad-libs. Eh, okay, but how does the music stack up? It’s brilliant, of course. With Kanye’s “Black Skinhead” as a point of reference, the minimalistic 808s and claps only accompany Billie’s multi-tracked and pitch-shifted vocals, before the verse starts and sound effects are scattered everywhere, with pained shrieks, glass shattering and moans adding to the lyrics. Seriously, I love little details where musical elements actually relate to the lyrics directly, but then that bass hits slowly and that one 808 just keeps going on with a shrill synth, and then it just ends entirely, pretty abruptly. This song is eerie and honestly pretty scary, and Crooks’ ad-libs and backing vocals contribute to that greatly. Eilish’s sing-songy melodies make it even weirder, even, making the song feel like a possessed toy box. That intense moment where it’s just that ear-piercing synth and the 808 is such an interesting musical moment, man, this is pop brilliance. It’s creepy art pop not designed to be an indie darling, but designed for the radio (This is insanely catchy as well) and that hits a soft spot for me. The best art is made for mass consumption. That new album’s coming in March by the way, and I’m incredibly excited.

Conclusion

That was a really freaking good week, actually, so I’m only having to force Worst of the Week out on LAUV and Troye Sivan for “i’m so tired...” (The song’s not even close to bad, it’s just my only option), with Best of the Week going to Billie Eilish again for “bury a friend”. Tied Honourable Mentions go to the equally amazing yet only somewhat flawed songs, with 21 Savage, J. Cole, Fredo and Dave all picking them up for “a lot” and “All I Ever Wanted”, respectively. See ya next week, but it won’t top this.

[hairstyle1453-blog]

60 Popular Haircuts & Hairstyles For Women Over 60

New Post has been published on http://girlsbesthairstyle.com/60-popular-haircuts-hairstyles-women-60/

60 Popular Haircuts & Hairstyles For Women Over 60

60 Popular Haircuts & Hairstyles For Women Over 60

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As you age the type of style that you want to have will likely change. The important thing to remember is that you have a lot of options that can help you look and feel younger. We are lucky to live in a time when age is truly just a number. Here are 60 hairstyles and haircuts for women over 60 to consider when you book your next visit to the stylist.

1. Asymmetrical Pixie

This hip and stylish cut is idea for busy ladies, and it does a lot to take years off the face. Pixie cuts come in a lot of different styles so be sure to let your stylist know that you want it quite a bit longer in the front if going with this particular look.

2. Before & After

We show this picture because it shows just how dramatic change you can get a cut and style. This lady looks at least ten years younger in little time. A light makeup application completed this look, and the model is almost unrecognizable from her before picture.

3. Blunt Razor Bob

This rounded bob with bangs sets off the eyes and frames a gorgeous smile. A bonus is that you have enough length for an updo.

4. Classic Updo

Long hair sometimes needs to be tucked away, and this look shows that you can look elegant at the same time. There are a lot of hair accessories that can make an updo a lot easier to get when you are in a hurry.

5. The Emmy Lou Layers

Emmy Lou Harris is a fashion and music icon. Her shaggy silvery cut truly brings out her beauty. This is a cut that can be done by any stylist with no hassle, and it grows out well if you want more length at times or just don’t get to the stylist often.

6. The Fonda

Jane Fonda knows how to rock this textured short highlighted cut. This style will help get you through the work week without a lot of time spent on styling.

7. Grey Highlight Curls

A curly vintage look is classy, and we love the variation of color in this look.

8. Long Straight Low Pony

A low ponytail keeps hair back, and we love the natural flow of this mostly straight look. Braiding the hair is another pretty way to get a different look.

9. Dark Grey Tips Long Grey Waves

Big hair can be a lot of fun. This look is truly age-defying and fun. A great look for those with thicker hair and that like some edge to their style.

10. Major Chin Length Curls

Big well defined highlighted curls look simply elegant all the time.

11. Jenner Pixie

Kris Jenner knows a thing or two about hair and this well-done pixie does a lot for her face.

12. Kinky Natural Curls

Letting hair have some natural gray and white in it over the years can really set it off as you can see from this kinky curly look.

13. Long Fab White Blonde

This style is almost a titanium color and the slight curl at the bottom shows off the fantastic volume.

14. Long Silky Soft Gray

These layers are something you can just get lost in.

15. Natural Long Center Part

A basic yet gorgeous all the same look.

16. Long White Curly Elegance

The Hollywood bombshell look can be had at any age.

17. Lots of Layers Blunt Cut

Soft layers and bangs will frame your face in elegant style.

18. Marcel Wave

This is another old Hollywood look that is fabulous when worn by older ladies that want glamor.

19. Messy Layered Shoulder Length Curls

If you have a lot of natural waves it is sometimes best to just go with it and let your beauty shine.

20. Christie Brinkley’s Long Side Sweep

It is hard to believe that Christie is over 60.

21. Helen Mirren’s Bob

If you are over 60, it pays to keep up with Helen Mirren if only for her great hairstyle choices.

22. Ombre Layers

This well-done ombre shows that older ladies can rock this trend with no problems.

23. Tousled Very Short Pixie

The pixie doesn’t require a lot of maintenance, and it looks great on any face shape.

24. Razor Cut Red Pixie

A deep burgundy pixie cut with an edge looks good on a lot of women.

25. Faith Hill’s Bob

Faith Hill has never been afraid of short hair that we love this mid-length layered bob and bangs on her.

26. Tapered At Nape Heavily Razored Bob

This cut has a bit more length to it than a lot of similar looks. The jagged lines create a youthful look for ladies over 60.

27. Round Asymmetrical Bob

A rounded short cut makes your smile truly shine. Rounded bobs are popular because they hug the face so closely.

28. Hip Bob

The overall look of this cut is super hip style. We love the sunglasses too! If you need to this style easily transitions to an updo.

29. Grey Curly Ombre

The curl pattern of this look and the contrast between brown and gray is lovely.

30. Opal Undercut

Opal hair is something those that are naturally gray or white haired should consider bringing their look up to date. Undercuts keep thick hair manageable.

31. Short Bob With Bangs

A good bob for those with thinning hair.

32. Short Blunt Bang Ear Length Bob

This superior face framing chin length cut with bangs does a good job being stylish yet manageable.

33. Super Thick Bob & Bangs

Very thick hair does well with a blunt cut bob like this one.

34. Heavily Layered Platinum Bob

This look is easy to style and stunning, and you get it all in one cute little cut! Just 5 minutes of styling in the morning is about all you need.

35. Shaggy Bob

Diane Keaton always seems to be wearing a cute bob these days. Here flared out layers are simply fun and pretty at the same time.

36. Rounded Sleek Bob

Sleek chin length hair that turns in to frame the face makes for a pretty youthful style.

37. Super Short Two Tone Red & Blonde Cut

This red and blonde look is hip and fun yet very flattering.

38. Tousled Side Swept Longer Pixie

It is hard not to love this longer and more textured take on the pixie cut.

39. Very Short Round Highlights

This Bob does well for ladies with fine hair.

40. Sally Fields

Sally knows that a bob cut frames her face and makes her look a lot younger than her years.

41. Sharon Osbourne Hot Red Pixie

If you like the style that takes it to another level than look no further than Sharon. If red is not your color, then consider a deep black blue or dark burgundy color.

42. Short Texture & Volume

A cute little side sweeps for those that want to keep it simple.

43. Shoulder Length Choppy Layers & Blunt Bangs

The location of the layers sets off the beauty of the face. An occasional trim is all you need to keep this style up besides a good weekly conditioner.

44. Shaggy Layers & Feathered Bangs

Layers and bangs seem to be essential for a lot of stylish looks.

45. Stacked Side Swept Pixie Cut

This pixie cut combines more than one color of blonde for an outgoing look that is easy to manage.

46. Tousled Little Shaggy Bob With Bangs

The waves and shaggy texture of this cut combine with the bangs for a flattering and youthful cut.

47. Shoulder Length Violet Grey Lob

This color is just amazing. You can have a lot of fun with a more pastel look when it comes to your bob. Soft pink, violet, blue, and yellow tone are all possibilities.

48. Side Swept Soft Basic Bob

Soft contours and naturally gray hair are stunning together. This brings out gorgeous eyes and skin.

49. Just Above The Shoulders Side Sweep

This professional yet classy cut is long enough to give you the option of an updo or a half up style. If you are out in the working world still, this is a go-to look.

50. Long Layers & Side Swept Bangs

A classy side sweep and long layers make an ethereal look for long hair fans.

51. Soft Just Above The Shoulders Bob

This is a sweet yet sassy little bob that frames the face beautifully.

52. Short Spiky

Short and spiky cuts can be a lot of fun, and they are simple to maintain. For added drama, you can get some highlights added in. Styling is as simple as a little bit of hair balm or wax.

53. Stacked Layers & Highlights

This stacked bob has a lot of texture and sophistication. The asymmetrical lines are hip and stylish.

54. Ms. Welch Long Highlight Layers

Raquel Welch defies her age with impeccable style with this long and layered look. Ms. Welch has a lot of styles that are captured in her best-selling wig collection.

55. Tucked Bob

A cute tucked behind the ears bob is all a lot of ladies need for a great new style.

56. Face Framing Razor Bob With Bangs

This look means you will never have to worry about having a look that doesn’t have a lot of texture and drama to it. Gorgeous highlights and well-cut bangs emphasize pretty eyes.

57. Very Long Silver Waves

Just because you are over 60 doesn’t mean you cannot have long luxurious hair. Just be aware of the importance of conditioning regularly and getting ends trimmed to avoid a scraggly appearance.

58.Wavy Swept Away Chin Skimming Cut

A classy bob with waves and highlights should always be considered for your next look.

59. Platinum & Red Asymmetrical Bob

This is a bob that is so much fun. A rock n roll inspired streaky look is gorgeous on older ladies if the right colors are used.

60. Silver Super Volume Silver Sheen Light Curl Bob

Silver hair is downright gorgeous when done well. This Bob has an insane amount of volume and the wavy swept over bangs make one think of old Hollywood.

Find and save ideas about Hair ideas on girlsbesthairstyle.com | See more ideas about Hair dos, Easy prom hairstyles and Easy winter hairstyles.

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[i-am-an-accidental-hipster]

other generations angry about millennials killing industries.

but seriously, those industries often deserve to be killed.

lets look at the list, shall we?

(i am drawing from this list right here: http://mashable.com/2017/07/31/things-millennials-have-killed/#hwO45tc0RZqb )

1. Beer: well, i guess the prohibitionists would be happy with us

2. J. Crew: (i didn’t even know the brand existed. i buy everything from salvation army, because i can’t afford new or expensive clothing)

3. Department stores: seriously, why would i go there? the entire point of such a place is to bombard you with so may advertisements and options that you feel compelled to buy what you can’t afford. I can get what i need from the internet, thank you.

4. Motorcycles: They are unsafe and impractical. i know this will rub motorcycle users the wrong way, but the fact of the matter is, they have very little in terms of safety features, cars don’t tend to see you in the road (the gorilla effect), and they don’t have enough carrying capacity to justify their use. also, the particular article it linked to said Harley-Davidson is complaining, and i say screw you, none of your stupid motorcycles have mufflers i don’t want to hear you from half way across the planet.

5. Diamonds: literally just pretty rocks, made out of one of the most common elements on the planet. their price is vastly inflated artificially by those who sell them. if i want to impress or attract a girl, i am most certainly NOT going to waste my cash on something useless to her. it’s hard enough to earn money as it is without spending it on freaking diamonds.

6. Golf: WHO THE HELL CARES ABOUT GOLF!?! it’s not even really that fun. Miniature golf can be fun on occasion, but mostly because of the set pieces. but regular golf? also, if you wanted anyone to actually pity the golf industry, maybe you shouldn’t keep TAKING LAND FROM PEOPLE WHO COULD USE IT MUCH BETTER

7. Bar Soap: meh. it’s just easier to use other kinds of soap. no hard feelings

8. college football: i am not wasting my money to watch a bunch of idiots throw a poor excuse for a “ball” and repeatedly smack into each other.

9. Lunch (?): ok, i don’t actually know what this one is about, or even how one would go about measuring this. and the article seemed to be broken, so i couldn’t find out. Do they mean less people are attending restaurants for lunch? because if that is the case, my parents literally told me to do exactly that, because making lunches at home is cheaper, and not much is added to the experience having lunch elsewhere. so yeah, i don’t think the problem is millennials here.

10. McDonalds: Ew. Next

11. Vacations: ok, so apparently this is about how millennials don’t take as many vacations because they are spending to much time working, making baby boomers and other generations feel guilty about vacationing? ok, for one thing, if you are feeling guilty about vacationing because some guys in their 20s aren’t doing it, maybe the guilt is actually coming from a different source. secondly, WE. ARE. NOT. RETIRED. heck, many of us were only recently able to get a job because the previous generations SCREWED UP THE ECONOMY. so no, we aren’t taking vacations as much as you, because WE CAN’T FREAKING AFFORD TO FALL INTO DEBT, IDIOTS

12. Paper Napkins: shouldn’t this be a good thing? like, yay we aren’t wasting paper needlessly any more? yay save the trees? i dunno

13. cars: expensive. Expensive to buy. expensive to rent. expensive gas. if i live in a place with public transportation (which i do), you can be sure as hell i am using THAT (which i am) rather than a car (which i am not)

14. crowdfunding: um, i may be wrong, but didn’t we start that? i think we have a right to destroy what we created.

15. wine: no, wine is always going to be around. as long as there are Catholics, there will be wine.

16. Wine corks: those things are freaking deadly. look it up.

17. toyota scion: never heard of it. next

18. fabric softener: i heard it ruins clothes, and my clothes are plenty soft already. also, my mom never used it, so why should i?

19: marriage: OK NOW IF YOU WANT MILLENNIALS TO LIKE MARRY EACH OTHER MAYBE YOU SHOULD MODEL HEALTHY MARRIAGES YOURSELVES. seriously. basically every friend i have has had at least one either abusive or neglectful parent, and many of their parents are divorced. if you wanted us to value marriage, maybe you should have gotten your FUCKING SHIT TOGETHER BEFORE YOU GOT MARRIED. my mom married a guy because “he made me laugh”, only to find out he was an evangelical atheist who kept trying to convert her from Catholicism for the next 20 years. it ended up screwing up literrally everything. because of him, my mom banned freaking Harry Potter from the household because they had a year and a half long fight over it. I even gave my dad a solution that would allow it into the house (i would “proofread” every book before giving it to my sisters), but NOOOO he had to WIN the STUPID ARGUMENT. he could NOT JUST LET IT GO. so yeah, i am not surprised that my generation doesn’t want to get fucking married. the only reason why i am still considering it is because part of me just wants to prove i can be a better husband and father than my dad.

20. McWrap: again, ew. next

21. Handshakes: i don’t know about everyone else, but as an autistic touching people is FUCKING WEIRD.

22. Canadian tourism industry: what. i didn’t realize that was a thing.

23. light yogurt: just because we can’t afford it doesn’t mean we don’t like it. i personally like light yogurt. it is just too expensive.

24. gambling: we are not idiots. we know we aren’t going to win anything. we never do

25. hotels. well, given that most of us can’t afford to travel, this is not surprising at all.

26. relationships: see 19

27: marmalade: such an unpleasant word. i’m not eating that

28. running: i live in southern california. i am not running around outside, thank you.

29. cereal: i don’t eat breakfast. it’s enough work to just roll out of bed and stubble to the bus stop.

30. anti-aging industry: anyone who is complaining about this clearly needs to read Tuck Everlasting, or The Forests of Silence, or Tolkien's story of the Fall of Numenor, or The Farthest Shore. Immortality sucks, man. i don’t want it.

31. Buffalo wild wings: yeah, i totally want to fill my stomach with THAT greasy mess.

32. focus groups: ???how???

33. travel marketing: still can’t afford to travel, man.

34. working: nah, you just won’t hire us

35. credit: we aren’t idiots, we know banks will try to screw us over

36. trees: so apparently this is because we won’t give up books for a kindle. WELL EXCUSE US FOR NOT KILLING THE BOOK INDUSTRY>

37. The American Dream: i think by now it has become clear who did that.

38. America: *hint* it’s not us, it’s those idiots who bought houses they couldn’t afford, and then through a tantrum when the banks charged interest on their loans, causing an economic collapse. also wallstreet. fuck those guys

39. Democracy: so, this is about how we don’t protest any more. you know why we don’t? because we have found that every single time we do, somebody goes “damn millennials and their radical ideas. it was ok when we did it in the 60s, but not now”. you want us to rally and protest, but only for the things YOU want to see.

40. Home Depot: meh. lowes is better.

41. Self-Pity: well, this is a gross misinterpretation of statistics. we feel bad for ourselves because YOU ALL FUCKING SCREWED US OVER

42. the 2016 election: that was not our fault. who did you give us to choose from? lets see, most of them were either highly intelligent but under-qualified, or extremely qualified but also untrustworthy, or downright insane. in the end, it was down to three candidates: a misogynist clown, a snake, and a guy who wanted to give everyone free college education. Y’all chose the snake and the clown. just saying.

43. consumerism: duh

44. suits: who cares

45. dinner dates: my experience working at a bakery might indicate otherwise.

46. movies: so we can’t afford to attend. sue us

47. sex: we are having less sex because we aren’t idiots and we know what sex does and we have better things to do than to drop everything to raise a family while we are still going to college. by now there are enough stories floating around of condoms that just failed to work, and frankly i do not want to be responsible for any girlfriend i might have getting an abortion because we both know we can’t afford to have a child. so guess what? abstinence

48. gyms: why would you pay to go to a place and sweat? you can walk outside to do that.

49. serendipity: nah, you killed it. see 19

50. loyalty programs: dude, if another hotel is cheaper or better, i’m using that one

51. loyalty in general: ok, false. we just want to survive, ok? also, loyalty must be earned. if my company is treating me poorly, or is treating my customers poorly, than yeah, i’m not going to be loyal to it.

52. taking risks: *sigh* so, this is false, clearly false. i can barely make my self say the cursed acronym, but *inhale* YOLO

53. patriotism: no, we just aren’t fanatics. we are loyal to our country so long as it continues to serve our interests. and if you dare tell me that that is not patriotic, read the gosh dang declaration of independence.

54. cruises: MONEY. also, it’s literally just a casino on a boat.

55. applebee’s: money. the article even admits it. so how is it our fault?

56. fashion: fuck fashion. give girls fucking pant pockets you perverts

57. hangout sitcoms: i can’t imagine anything more boring to watch

58. the big mac: it’s not even that big

59. stiletto: i don’t know what that is

60. romance: see 19

61. 9-to-5 workday: again, JUST FREAKING HIRE US (i actually have a job now, and am enjoying it immensely, and would work more hours if there were more available, but my employers, being the nice people that they are, have actually maxed out the number of people they can employ affordably. there are so many people who need a job in my city, and my employers are trying to employ as many as they can, particularly millennials and recent immigrants. it’s the other businesses around that are making it hard for us to get jobs.)

62. the NFL: see 8

63. gen X retirement: *sigh* IF YOU WANTED YOUR RETIREMENT MONEY MAYBE YOU SHOULD HAVE MADE SURE YOU COULD AFFORD THE INTEREST FOR THE LOAN ON THAT FUCKING HOUSE

64. the Olympics: how?

65: brunch: are we supposed to be hobbits now? you want us to have second breakfast?

66. the EU: i don’t really understand this one. it seems to say that millennials ruined the EU by liking it too much?

67. baby names: I’M NAMING MY KIDS ALBERTUS MAGNUS AND URIEL ANGELO AND THERE IS NOTHING YOU CAN DO TO STOP ME MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

68. banks: this article actually gets it right, you can read it in the title. we are ruining banks, and it is the fault of the banks. REVENGE!!!

69. Oil: i can’t afford it. next

70. everything: this article actually sums up just about everything i just said