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cadaverre · 9 months

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Private school queens

(Help omg i literally hate my school sm)

omg you too?? it sucks so bad fr

(stop it’s religious and everyone is rich and i bring up my scholarship and they’re like oh cool how did u get it and it’s like man idk i’m poor and they’re like oh… also why is there a uniform and everyone wears that stupid perfume and it’s like GODDAMN I ALREADY HAVE ALLERGIES IN THE SUMMER YOURE MAKING IT SO MUCH WORSE)

#sorry i hate it #but it has the programs i want…#and it’s so good #like academics wise #and i feel so privileged being able to complain like #asks #beautiful mutuals #molly 🌅

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opens-up-4-nobody · 21 hours

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hey um not to be parasociall but how did the meeting with your advisor go???? also would it be possible for you to switch advisors/program or something so you can change your research interests if that's the issue? Im a doctoral student as well so I get how tricky that stuff can be depending on your program.... Anyway I hope things better for you xoxo

Lol, ur fine! It went alright

#basically i just told him ive been paralyzed from working on my project out of fear from what happened when i had a breakdown in april #which is true but is still an incomplete picture of whats happening. and he was like yeah thats understandable. let me kno what i can do to #help. so that was good. tho he did look a bit deer in headlights lol #and ive started reading project relevant papers again and i understand what theyre saying which is good #i feel like im behind where i should b but im also like: ok right i do actually think this is interesting. evolution is sick as fuck #but i wouldnt want to switch advisors bc hes like one of 2 bacteria ppl in the department #i would have to go to a different school to do what i want with eps. either like a industry focused lab interested in slime as #like a thickener. which sounds boring. or go back to my old boss who is desert ecology focused #its just a matter of: do i really want to b an Evolutionary microbiologist? a very academic job? or do i want a job that's just a job?#and like maybe to stay with cyanos i would have to leave and then go back to school to focus on toxic algal blooms #then i could probably get water quality jobs. but like would that b fulfilling? idk. it just sucks #bc i fit in so well with my lab interest wise. its just a matter of whether or not i want my Job to b my whole life #unrelated

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call-me-pup2 · 3 months

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Won't lie I am a little worried that if I decide to start posting on my 0F again in a few more months that some of my new followers here will be mean about it ;-;

I don't want people that don't support sexworkers on here anyway but doesn't mean I still wouldn't be sad to loose followers for it

#as of right now im still undecided but some days i want to do it again #im also working on things to help my confidence so at least im actively doing something you know?#but i still feel like i cant wont be able to make the sort of stuff i really want to in space i have now #hmm maybe i should plot the type of content i could make in this space while i ponder #im a little silly though since in my head im going to officially decide in october but thats also my business month job wise #very on brand of me though to make myself even more busy than i already would be #im just hoping that by october ill feel more 'me' again confidence wise with my appearance #plz ignore the spelling mistakes i type too quick and i cant edit the tags without deleting the whole thing and im just a pup #it also honestly make me feel like shit when people bring up my spelling #i spent basically my whole academic life getting in trouble for it #so im either going to have to just stop yapping here or yous lot are going to have to politely ignore the mistakes

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astriiformes · 2 months

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Suddenly having a crisis about grad school again. Help.

#i'm passionate about history of science but i'm not sure what it's going to do for me employability-wise #and kind of feel like it's not going to get me a job where i really feel like i'm having a significant impact on the world #which is kind of critical for me #not to mention i'm not sure what i ought to focus on #and admittedly i am maybe already thinking about hsci as a means to an end to afford additional training in archives or etc #because i know the odds of a good academic job are slim #but it feels a little dumb and reckless as a result #i don't know. maybe it's the summer depression talking but i feel really awful about the future in a way i haven't for a while

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averlym · 1 year

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HI I DIDNT KNOW YOU WERE INTO ADAMANDI HOLY SHIT. Can’t believe so few people know about this masterpiece of a musical

:OOOOO hai i agree it is criminally (haha yknow bc there are crimes..) underrated!! and really brilliant!!! discovered it literally midway through the week and akdfjgsjhdsjhjgdf

have a doodle of the saints :3

#this is kinda because on someone's insta i saw one of the saints doing a peace sign dksajh have smth silly #adamandi #ask me stuff???#realising i have to put my tags at the beginning before rambles or tumblr won't catch it #i am into adamandi. now. this is terrible timing because exam season but hMM the academic grindset really resonates now huh #the moment i caught myself in the ao3 tag i was like ''oh.''#i have so many thoughts. so many many thoughts. im so insane about this musical actually. also the fandom so far seems so nice #also yeah! the number of people who know about it is quite small huh.. it makes me kinda feel like im infiltrating the group... ?#late to the party as ever. but it's. so so good. such a musical ever the brainrot is real #also the way the creators themselves are active on tumblr :OO rly cool. ngl the tags they left under my posts had me #giggling screaming kicking my feet etcetera... and bc apparently i thrive off positive reinforcement that sparked the whole cut fruit art..#i am itching to know about the track thing with portia. also portrix real the lesbians keep winning!! also also i may have spent half a day #internet stalking ><. secret pinterest boards where :O #anyway thank you for the ask anon idk how to answer concisely but yes. adamandi. oh my god.#miscellany: can we appreciate ambrose's high notes.. also i was on wiki reading about ''apollonian vs dionysian'' it's insane #on yet another note. im entering my lin era rn i think. what a time. where can i run so true + vincent's surname my beloved. forest imagery #side note? tiny little detail i'd love to do smth about in the future: in word to the wise there's smth about “appraising your rings” and i #the one who pulls the strings beatrix mentions “bought my classmates rings” like. kjdfhsgjkhd???? thinks.#.. but new fav musical unlocked is all #between this and watt i am maybe into my murder musical era. confession that i don't do horror much because i have an overactive imaginatio #but like those two hit the spot. and i think organic imagery.. blood visuals.. is very cool// and the moment you start looking at literal #life and death situations then the dramaticness especially comes in and that's fun!! // also i read smth today about tragedy making you #appreciate irl stuff more. like ''wow thats messed up im sure glad that isnt me i love life''. and lowkey?? yeah

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myimaginationplain · 4 months

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imagine: professor utonium mentoring dexter vs professor membrane mentoring mandark

#dexter & mandark are the only two kids in their district to qualify for some young scholar program & arr bussed off to take classes from #their assigned mentor once or twice a week.#dexter is at odds with himself about it at first. on one hand he's glad that his intelligence is finally being appreciated & nurtured in #some official capacity. let alone by a mind as lauded as the creator of the powerpuff girls. but on the other hand he would prefer to just #move on up to taking college courses entirely rather than have to go through this half measure. & he also gets a little disillusioned with #utonium when he realizes 1) that pretty much everything utonium is famous for was invented by accident including the ppg #& 2) outside of the ppg utonium hasn't achieved much more than dexter himself already has #meanwhile mandark practically kisses the ground that membrane walks on because he's so glad someone in his life recognize's his potential #& membrane sort of sees mandark as the son he wishes dib could be. he's never very open or affectionate about it though because y'know.#it's membrane #he never talks about his kids & sees them so rarely that mandark didn't even realize he had children of his own until like 3½ months into it #whereas utonium cannot shut up about his girls. nor would dexter want him to since they seem to be the most interesting thing about the man #utonium realizes pretty quickly that dexter doesn't need academic guidance so much as he needs social interaction with 1) people who won't #bully or belittle him for being who he is & 2) children his own age. so he starts subtlety encouraging his daughters to meet & befriend him.#I imagine that they come to visit him during his office hours regularly anyways so this happens pretty naturally.#also I think that even though utonium & membrane would definitely respect one another & collaborate well in a professional sense they don't #really mesh personality wise. utonium finds membrane to be far too cold & callous.#membrane thinks that utonium is basically a baby man who doesn't hold himself the way an accomplished man of science should.#ppg #powerpuff girls #the powerpuff girls #dexter's laboratory #dexter's lab #invader zim #headcanon #au #professor utonium #professor membrane #dexter mcpherson #(why is that his fanon last name again? where did that come from)

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slav-every-day · 6 months

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#being a humanities major is pretty funny sometimes #cause today was one of the most stressful days of my academic career work-wise #and pretty much #if you were watching me from the outside #I looked like I was looking at words on a computer for about 7-10 hours #cause I was #I dunno I just feel like stem can look so much more intimidating #but my reading and writing were not good friends today #slav #slav every day #voltron

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theultracharmingladynoire · 8 months

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I can do this

#I don't really think there's any context to this except at the moment I am kind of in my lowest point academic wise and I want to try mybest #And give my best despite all the procrastinating I am doing #I need to go back to where I was like four years earlier academic wise #I have to. I have to do this so I can be happier in teh future. Hopefully.#I have to believe in myself even when others don't <- extremely corny now that I say it. But. I have to.#N rambles

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dudeshusband · 10 months

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tbh. i feel like "smart" is all i've ever been to people.

#typewriter dings #also i'm afraid that's my only true talent #absorbing information #sounding academic #once i leave school i have nothing going for me #and i know that from experience #i'm slow (speed wise). i'm not notably kind #i'm not that creative #professors like smart students. everybody else doesn't.#and i'm not about to invent anything

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la-galaxie-langblr · 3 months

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I've known it deep down for a long time but I need to get better at managing my mental health, especially at uni

#like wdym for for a whole semester i had near weekly panic attacks and i just!!!! shrugged it off!!!!!!!!#“oh well thursdays are like this” THEY DIDN'T HAVE TO BE THAT'S NOT NORMAL #just because it's normal *for me* does not mean it should be normal #“yeah i average 1-2 panic attacks a month” GIRLIE NO WHY ARE YOU SO CASUAL ABOUT THIS YOU ARE ABLE TO DO SMTH ABOUT IT #i have a lot more going on responsibility and academic wise in 2nd year and i Cannot be doing that again #rest assured i have way more happy memories than bad ones of first year but my housemates don't need to be concerned about me screaming #crying throwing up spasming even when i get a bad panic attack #i appreciate their help ofc but i need to take care of and responsibility for myself yknow #anyways here ends my saturday night musings #ellis exclaims

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starburns · 4 months

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the impact watching community nbc in 7th grade had for me. definitely a little easier to remind myself that you're not too late and it's not that bad.

#LIKE.#everytime i feel left behind or i feel like ive failed #academically or life wise #i just find it easier to remind mtself lol. like jeff kr britta or annie etc etc #and that wherever i end up i can still make the best of it there #esepcially acsdemic wise even if i dont get into the best oossibke college with the smartest peoole alive #i think id be pretty ok with bad colleges too. annie was #waisa haiiiii boss #yappings

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bambisnc · 6 months

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⪩.⪨

#yin yaps ₊˚. 𖦹.♡︎🪼#okay so updates maybe the class im in rn is a bit tough academic wise and yk i barely know anyone #+ idr like the girl i sit w (shes a mutual friend) shes p ehh BUT theres this one other like group of people 2 of whose names start w a btw #who i think r into kpop !!#so im def coping well #and my newest obsession is peraltiago if ppl were curious <3 #+ the whole siren situation is so. idek i'll make a separate post for that

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faaun · 6 months

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omg i FEEL you about the asd articles... i'm cuttently studying psychology and THIS makes me wanna go and pursue a job in research after graduating :')

yeah !! you should! i study a very interdisciplinary degree and out of all the fields I study in (ML/phil/psych/neuro) psychology has the most inconsistent, outright harmful, sometimes misinformed-at-best info sprinkled into publications and even lectures and it's a genuine source of frustration ! we need def need more researchers committed to accuracy and fairness and eliminating stigmas, biases, etc. :)

#i think one issue is in many other fields once a better theory crops up or old perspectives are somehow refuted it takes far less time #for new publications and teachings within the field to update. like it takes a while but it happens #meanwhile in psych you have articles and lectures franksteined from older positions that have been frankensteined from even older research #which includes several conflicting presuppositions and sometimes even entirely unfounded assumptions etc etc and it does make u wonder how #the fuck stuff like that gets published in the century of our lord y2k onwards. like yeah yeah were going thru a replication crisis and #meta-research wise we have an issue where quite substantial research is not integrated into the field bc their citations metric never #took off etc etc but even given All That i think this is disproportionately an issue which at least partially is due to irresponsibility on #behalf of already established researchers. some things ive seen published in elsevier journals shouldnt have been there.#i shouldn't have seen a clipart photo of an evil puppet master with horns on an academic slide about ASPD in a room full of 100s of ppl #led by our well-established lecturers. smth needs to change fr.#but fr what do i know im just an undergrad idk 🤷‍♀️ it does come w the territory of being a field the existence of which relies on second #or third order extrapolations + interpretations lifted from first order evidence ig? idk #asks #anon #Ψ </3

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marinsawakening · 1 year

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Nothing more obnoxious than people who look at any piece of genre fiction and deem it young adult. Then you try to explain it's for adults and they go "well it's for adults who never grew up". Like buddy genre fiction is a huge market you cannot 'no true scottsman' your way out of this and claim the only true adults are those who like Proper Literature. "Where do you think a book store would put that book huh 😏" In the sci-fi section. Which you'd know if you ever went there.

#This post is about my dad btw #Whenever I see those posts going 'ok but book snobs aren't REAL they are fabricated by Big YA to shame ppl who like literature' I'm like #I know him personally and I see him every week #I massively respect my dad's literary opinions because he has an extensive academic literary background #And a clear grasp on near every aspect of books and storytelling #Except I also periodically want to beat him over the head with his copy of Ulysses #My posts #Writing wise

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storiesofthestreetmp3 · 11 months

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Oh yeah post-date Maybe im aroace it's hitting

#i think it also may be. completely overloading myself in every single way like academics-wise schedule-wise emotion-wise .#and i jsut don't have the capacity to handle this at this time.

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opens-up-4-nobody · 2 years

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...

#the thing abt me is that if u complement me in an academic context i will melt #me walking into every interview: fuck this school. i dont wanna go there. im sad. on one is gonna want me. i can hardly function. fuck this #me walking out of every interview: fuck. the project is cool and they said nice things abt me 😭#fuck. the guy from the lab i interviewed with basically said if u wanna be here i can make it happen. i like ur style and i think ur a #super good candidate 😭 and he quoted my wanky writing bc i got a bit flowery and idealistic lol #and hes on the admissions committee so he was like: yea i can support u if u want just let me kno #and fucking hell the project is cool. but the thing is i think id have to be less of a sad sac bc i think he expects a lot and is hands off #but it is a big institution with a lot of creative ppl and theyre good abt supporting interdisciplinary work #so like the opportunities there would be pretty fucking great i think. hhhhhh god. theres no way i could take the uk one now #fuck. wtf am i gonna do abt that? do i bow out now before ive committed so they have a shot with another person #or is it too late for that bc they already put my name forward to the committee #god dammit. this was the one i was supposed to b like yea no shot am i getting this. and now im like fucking considering it like #the opportunities.... but id have to live in new jersey... it would b closer to home i guess. id b back on east coast time #and i could work with Yellowstone organisms. and i bet the classes r pretty fucking rad education wise #god. decisions. im gonna play Choices by the Hoosiers like a million times #thats what i did wjen i was deciding to go for undergrad. and then i didnt even decide. i was just like... well i dont wanna go to the #place all my classmates r going. i will go 3hrs away. then 12hrs by plane for my masters #fuck. at least it went well. everyone was nice and the 2nd guy i talked to was like:#even if u dont go here. email me if u end up working with zinc and i can help. and i was like 😭#i got a bit rambly with him but whatever he was 15min late so we're even lol #i was way too nervous. but it was ok. but also i dont understand wtf other incoming phd students r like??#like they say im a good candidate and ive got good background and im like ??? what sort of losers r u looking at if u think im good?#i just think maybe what i wanna do is unique and very specific so im like not trying to do just anything. i have standards lol #and apparently im more coherent than i give myself credit for. i talk good sometimes and i have enthusiasm when i dont feel like im dying #god. i was not expecting this. i dont belong at a school working with tech startups like wtf. i come from a place of slightly trash #universities lol. well my undergrad uni wasnt so bad... well i mean the city is the butt of a lot of ohio related jokes tho. im looking at #u klinger. fucking mean streets of toledo. whatever the school im at now is worse. couldnt even keep my boss here smh #anyway what the fuck. and i got a lotta writing done today what the fuck #me being competent???? unheard of. god. imagine if i had my shit together. i could kill god. algae and other scientists would fear me #unrelated

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