#like bitch I wasn’t trashing you but I’m sure af gonna start now

[hairenya]

One of my colleagues and I are fighting (because she’s a bitch) and she framed it as wanting to be concerned with my teaching abilities which is hilarious because the student body absolutely adores me and hates her. Like motherfucker I am the Princess Diana of this middle school I will end your entire existence do not fuck with me.

[yakumtsaki]

Cyneswith rolls the want to dine out with her Methuselahian boy-toy and I’m hoping we can knock this love out during this date so we never have to see him again. Naturally the road to 20 simultaneous lovers is gonna have some duds, but did we really have to start with one?? Between Cyn’s gray hair turn on and Shajar’s fitness/fatness ones the chemistry mechanic is ruining my life this generation.

Yea that’s great, CADP, here’s an even more appropriate green face: 🤢🤢🤢

-I don’t get paid enough for this shit. 

Random Waiter sweetie, I’m so sorry. I’m sorry we’re romancing this old bitch in front of you, oh my god.

Mercifully CADP wastes no time falling in love with Cyneswith after this public woohoo witnessed by every townie within a 20 mile radius, and the date is a stunning success:

LMAO. Watch Cyneswith become a pillar of the community thanks to publicly banging the elderly, she truly can do no wrong. No wonder she’s the only child Jojo acknowledges. 

Beyond over for Don. 

Cyneswith returns home in the glowing triumph of her platinum plumbob. She literally hasn’t even made it to the front door yet-

-and CADP calls to ask her out again! Man, these drama professors are relentless, remember how half-alien prof stalked Gunther? Did this guy even go home or is he calling us right from the diner where we left him?? Whatever the case, hardest ‘Stay Here’ ever pressed, grandpa. 

-But I wanna go out with him again! 🌸

Yea well we don’t have time to be systematically dating these flops, Cyn, if you wanted in depth affairs you should have rolled a different LTW.

NICE. Another fine addition to our yard of wonders! We’re still not dating you, CADP, but when we’re throwing ragers on this thing, we’ll be thinking of you with some nostalgia and a lot of disgust. 

With Cyneswith platinum for the foreseeable future, I take a look at how everyone else is doing to ensure there aren’t any aspiration failures lurking. Ti-Ning and Frances are ultra-loved up and doing great-

-Angel rolls the want to get engaged to Wulf as well as the want TO INVITE OVER GUNTHER AKA HER TEENAGE FLING FROM 30 YEARS AGO, FFS ANGEL-

-and Don.. well he’s seen better days. The sad ‘go on a date’ want is killing me, I’ve considered it a given so far that he’s endgame for Cyn but they haven’t been interacting much lately, we’ll see how it goes, it might legit be over him.

The semester ends and with it Sophie’s insane 0 studying A+ streak, which is understandable since she literally almost died. Proud of Wulf and Don for bringing their grades up since they were both doing terribly, Don especially was flirting with academic probation last semester. I guess once your gf is no longer distracting you because she’s too busy cheating on you, you start hitting the books.

It’s a new dawn, it’s a new day, it’s a new life.. and Sophie autonomously goes to gossip with Shajar!!! I was so shocked I unironically took a screenshot of the little action queue window, but whatever, it’s a big deal! 

-Hey Shajar, you know who’s an even bigger turbocuck than you?? Ti-Ning! God I can’t stand that loser. 

-Haha couldn’t agree more, Sophie! 🖤 Not like I’d agree with anything you say, I have my own personality and opinions and everything!! Why are we talking about him like he’s not right here? I’m not questioning you, just curious! 🖤

-It’s my new bullying tactic! 

-It’s great! 

-Congratulations on your ever-evolving bullying techniques, Sophie! 🖤

-Congratulations on idolizing me! Maybe you’re only a cuck and not a turbocuck after all.

AAAAAAA THEY’RE PLAYING RED HANDS OMG OMG IS THIS FINALLY GONNA HAPPEN????

-Haha great punch, Sophie! I actually felt the nerve damage as it happened!

-Thanks, ever since my post-workout coma I’m stronger than ever!

OMG THEY FINALLY BECAME FRIENDS. Bro I still cannot believe Cyneswith not only befriended Sophie first but is LITERALLY BFFS WITH HER. UN.REAL. ANYWAY there’s only so much blue balling I can take from these two, it’s time to find out if there’s something there once and for all. But first, we need a slight adjustment so let’s head to the nearest mirror..

-OH BROTHER.

In the name of love, Shaj, come on!

-So, Sophie.. As I’m sure you can see, I’m blonde now. And I had to sign a contract promising I won’t sue for how terrible it makes me look, so I’m legally blonde. Now that that’s out of the way..

-..it’s Ti-Ning trashing time!

GODDAMMIT SHAJAR NO. NO MORE TI-NING TRASHING, NO MORE USELESS PLATONIC INTERACTIONS, IT’S GO TIME. Check her out, and let the chips fall where they may!!!

F I N A L L Y I                 L N                L A                A L                N L                I Y L L A N I F

OK. SO NOW WE KNOW. What you do from now on is up to you, first and last time I’m intervening but these two were driving me insane.

-And so after careful consideration, it became clear that blonde is truly my color! 

-Are you sure, Shaj? Because when I saw you upstairs you were sobbing and doing vomiting motions in front of the mirror.

-Aw Angel, that’s not a very nice thing to say! Don’t worry sis, I love your new look! In fact, I’m so proud of the way you look I want you right there next to me when I meet potential lovers! 💗

NOW THAT’S WHAT I LIKE TO SEE. I mean I wish I wasn’t seeing Shajar’s terrible blonde hair but Sophie’s blondeness turn on forced my hand. But the rest of this pic is what I like to see!

Despite recent developments, Sophie remains elusive af but I’m not butting in anymore, I’m returning to my go with the flow playstyle. So Sophie once again leaves us dick in hand and goes inside to.. you guessed it, socialize with Cyneswith. Shajar follows suit.. and..

....

................

.....................................

SHAJAR. YOU FINALLY STEPPED UP. I guess there’s only so much cucking from Cyneswith one person can take!!! If Sophie rejects this I’m literally gonna die-

-HELL YES OMG FINALLYYYYYYYYYYYYYY 

CYNESWITH ARE YOU KIDDING ME. BRO. LITERALLY THE BIGGEST COCKBLOCK TO EVER LIVE

And Shajar is now in love with Sophie, whereas Sophie isn’t even best friends with her yet, oh Shaj.. Well whatever, you’ll get there (I hope). ACR gets right down to business, let’s ignore Sophie thinking of Cyneswith, istg..

Boy, that escalated quickly. I mean we literally went from first kiss ever to woohoo with 0 other interactions in between but after all those years of incelitude who can blame Shajar.

And it’s official!!! ❤️ I’ve been convinced these two belong together ever since they were teens but I was also convinced Gunther belonged with Melody/Daniel belonged with Brittany/Jojo belonged with Frances and we remember how all 3 of those went so only time will tell.

In the meantime let’s marvel at how uneven this burgeoning relationship is thanks to Shajar unilaterally obsessing over Sophie for half her teenhood. But she finally got her! An inspirational tale about never giving up on your dreams even when your dreams prefer your sister. 

[stray-tori]

An Innocent Sin & the good gay flashback ft. my descent into madness

I wasn’t sure if I should post this but I mostly want it archived so here we go. This is from like,, September?

So. “An Innocent Sin” is a dumpster fire unlike anything I’ve ever seen. I don’t remember why I decided to read it. maybe I was crazy. Either way... I read it. It soon started to touch upon (very very outlandish) sexual abuse which I thought was interesting. (the angst, not so much some of the wack circumstances surrounding it)

ANYWAY. at some point... we have a flashback. And not just that. It has a gay character.

And it turns rly gay. which mind you, is still in a het smut manwha (that has a “gay” side couple, but still!)

And it destroyed me.

For those who want to read it because I genuinely think the flashback is a decent bit, it’s all the bonus chapters between chapter 77 and 78 I think. There’s a part before that too, but idk where exactly anymore. (It’s on lezhin! or your platform of choosing)

I don’t THINK you’ll need any other knowledge to get the flashback bit? but it’s been a while.

Below the cut (rip mobile users), you can read all of my amazing reactions (all of these were text messages, for context - but I took most of the replies and convos about other things out). Post is also tagged as long post. :))

(i’m serious, this is fucking long)

__________

Here I am. Liking the gay flashback character. Feck. Main dude is still straight but idk it's cute pff

This is a mess. The girl white hair likes, likes black hair, maybe, but thinks white hair is attractive

What just happened is sth I'd like to know too pff He's so cute tho omg. Watch me melt Can we stay in this flashback before everything got perverted af and before white hair gets assaulted all the time I would send an eyebrow emote if I could Context: he's asking he says it again

Ik it's not mutual but loookkk he's so sweet. He's kinda rude in present time, can't we stay in this flashback forever

I never asked for gay, never expected gay but I got gay

This story is trash why am I still reading it shdhhd

He caught his mom cheating. And now she's forcing him to watch??? What is thissss Well adoptive mom But still sudhdidu what Bitch how dare YOU exist

Save my babyyyy

Yay sister that's not yet a rapist to the rescueee

This flashback is actually just nicer in every way let's just stay here This is a super long flashback btw Idek anymore what triggered it

Okay I think I'm gonna make the sensible decision and let this dumpster fire rest and just go sleep

It was very wild. I kinda wanna see white hair get therapy but it has 90 chapters and I'm at like 30... So I'm very concerned this is gonna be very dragged out. Idek if it's even finished ahahsududi - but I do kinda wanna see where it goes and see more cute Noah (white hair) so. Here we are.

yeahhh like i was down for the sexual abuse angst but then the mother killed the adoptive son's mother bc the dad had a thing for her?? and it was someone a person studying with white hair knew and so he's investigating and I'm like how did this turn into a crime organisation kind of plot

hhhhhhh i... i appreciate these horny things also tackling abuse but it always kind of gives me weird vibes to have both, especially when its very horny. And when people are horny to people who've been abused. Idk but I'd assume... you might try NOT to tie them up if they're frequently bondaged during their assaults. I'm just.... disjdksdj hello?? am i weird?? why are they fine with it???

also this manwha is so wild, theres this murder mystery investigation thing and then theres just a couple doing honry stuff sprinkled in between and i'm like OKAY

they rescued a guy in their basement and he's understandably very traumatized and they're trying to question him cut to our main couple trying bondage which i still dont understand bECAUSE HE'S A RAPE VICITM WHY ARE YOU OKAY WITH THIS the ones questioning arent the main couple of course but idshkjds

like im glad he's somehow okay with all this horny stuff despite his trauma and im glad he can be happy and have a nice relationship but DO WE NEED THIS MUCH OF IT he's very cute tho

i like that even when i try other stuff lezhin recommends me it still has large amount of gay in it

[mei: i mean... that's pretty great, if you ask me]

I mean I agree, I'm enjoying the gay eheheh these tonal whiplashes there's not even that much white space between the panels fhjd nvm it just turned horny goddamn it can there be 1 chapter without fucking? okay, there were the flashbacks

WE ARE BACK IN FLASHBACKS but im not getting the gay relationship, sad

OH WAIT AM I GETTING GAY COMFORT bc thats very good too

OH NNOOO this turned sad very quickly

I'M SORRY IM SPAMMING BUT THIS IS JUST ANGSTY

I'M :((((

different species confirmed

I rly like them :((( I like the current girl too but it's just..... very horny with her. the flashbacks are nice [current tori edit: she’s very unloyal idk why i said I liked her] im weird HHHHH RIPPP 

someone help him he looks so saddddd

not sure if thats the most healthy relationship but I'LL TAKE IT

AWWW black hair's mom cooks mild food for them bc Noah can't eat spicy food :((( im soft

PFFF

I LOVE THE FLASHBACKS :(((

awww

i feel like theyve done much more bonding than noah's current relationship. I mean yes I think its cute when she comforts him, too, but they rarely do anything besides be horny together

OH OH THEY'RE KISSING

best buildup, honestly

the position is hornier than I'd like later here goes hope it stays cute

D-did someone just respect the word "stop"??? I am amazed

i think you might uh. have some trauma stuff too so yknow

Dohye is a little dramatic in his reassurance but it's all rly cute so I'm :(( I like them a lot pls stay like this getting invested in flashbacks is always like: ik it wont stay but pls stay like this

hELP

chapters ending in "i wanna touch him" is never good. I'm scared. Oh okay he didnt do anything. PHEW. He's already better than the girl, can't they just end up together lmao

[Noah was jealous]

w-why do you look so evil dohye haukdhjs

oh. oh no. the horny is starting. pls dont... just be cute forever

DOHYE NO YOU WERE SO DECENT WHY ARE YOU LYING ABOUT KOREAN TRADITIONS TO GET HIM TO DO STUFF HORNY STUFF TOO NO PLS STOP I JUST- WHEEE TvT the manwha is actually less visually horny in the flashbacks but im not sure if its bc its BL which isnt rly the genre of the manwha or if its bc they're still kids basically, which... I'd respect the latter, tho I'd prefer it to be like this constantly haha

okay. he's not respecting stop anymore, but it's also more of embarrassed nature more than "no i dont want this stop" so maybe i can forgive it. Still losing points, but he hugged him and it was sweet so HHHHHHHHHHH NOT SURE HOW I SHOULD JUDGE THIS SITUATION

They [Noah’s family] forbid him to visit his friends house I AM DEVASTATED

understandable they're a rapist, a fucked up murderer mother and a father with a thing for younger women so

tho he dont know any of that but yknow he's so pretty just fucking end me on the spot

hooo

they are boyfriends and ik from the future that his sister is gonna ruin it allll she has those drugs that make visual imaginations feel like they rly happened to the person (dont know if thats real but holy fuck its terrifying) and she's used it before to say that Noah assualted her. and im pretty sure shes gonna use it again bc there was a panel of Noah remembering Dohye being uhhhh intimate with her and thats why Noah began to hate him and im so sad im not ready for it. bc he's denied it in the future and i honestly couldnt see it happening even before that or she drugged Dohye, i guess thats a possibility too

[current tori: oh girl, it’s neither and it’s wack]

which if, btich you gonna die even more enough rambling, more reading. this makes me so sad but also spicy

on the manwha note, he thinks Noah doesnt like his family bc he's adopted and doesnt feel comfy which....... fair enough i suppose. and he's so cute im gonna melt just looK AT THIS 

SHUt UP, IM GONNA CRY

OH MY GODDDD he ate like ice and gum and all that, and Dohye assumed it was bc of the more spicy food and got rl worried, but he was just trying to get the smell out of his breath bc he wanted to kiss him ukhsdjs HOW CAN YOU BE SO CUTE HELLLOOOOOOOOO

look at them. LOOK AT mY BABIESSSS

how am i ever gonna care about the main couple again aww he-he wanted to go to the same highschool as him :((( im sad bc i know its not gonna happennnnnn

[mei: also at this point, you're literally never gonna care about them. i don't even know the main couple that well and i honestly don't care about them whatsoever.]

WAIT NO they're actually going to the same school awww ik it wont take long until sister fucks it up for them but for now theyre so sweet ohmygodddd

cant he move in with them, fuck his family honestly

dohye he's not a fucking pokemon iukhsdjs

oh. its. turning horny i am displeased with this development but i guess its natural for their relationship however COULD YOU DO IT AT HOME AND NOT IN SOME DUSTY SMALL ROOM how do ppl do this i like that the comments too are just "... is anyone still carng about the other girl?" sakjds

this is the best 3 panels in existence.

h-he just took your hand dohye idk what to tell you

[mei: "you blush at everything i do" god if that isn't me, idk what is]

awww its cute dohye is getting bonus points bc he invited Noah over while his mom wasnt home, they watched some sexual stuff and he DIDNT try to do anything what is this where can i get more of this

"well im not okay"

MY BABIESSSS 

they still didnt do much btw they're just kinda exploring and its honestly nice TvT I dont want this to ever endddd

[Dohye sees Noah’s sister and approaches her] N O

N OOOO

this is the starttttt of something.......... TERRIBLEEEE 

:((( babyyyy

I AM EMO

Noah was drugged im sure. hes having dreams and waking up in pain and the sister is asking doyhe over I DONT LIKE THISSSSSSS OH HE DECLINED

OKAY OKAY he saw him with her again but it was from behind and im not sure if it rly happened??? oh no this is terrible. Noah :((( poor child

i am so emo about this

[reminder he’s been abused TvT]

[the sister: “Don’t you want to know why?”]

i will. murder someone he called to ask her to delete his number btw what is this manwha but this is just gonna make it that more tragic when whatever happens that breaks them apart :(((

he's such a good bf but Noah just wont TELL him his side I'M SO SAD

I AM SO SAD

No

NO

It cant end im actually tearing up nooo you were so cuteeee and happpyyy

[*sister is telling dohye to come to the gym hall*]

what else is she gonna do she already teared [current tori: ahem... T O R E] them apart THAT'S NOT DOYhE. THATS NEVER HIM. OH MY GOD. is it a look alike??? damn, she's dedicated to just. ruining it, huh

I’M

I’M SO SAD

now he's switching SCHOOLS NO NOOOOO how will i ever find happiness againnnn NO they're misunderstanding further they're not talking properly i mean i get it but oh my god

I'M :((( 

NO NOOOO pls make up in the future at least omg he tried to clear it up tooo ahhh i dont even have hopes for them getting back together but i just i want them to clear it up im crying first manwha to make me cry and it's this dumpster fire ahaha maybe a little too bc it kinda hit a little close to home i guess but goddamnn ittttt they were so cuteee and so happy and AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

OH NO. Noahs getting drugged and assaulted. And he's realizing it happened before, he just forgot. I am. so sad it's not horny drawn either which i appreciate but MY HEART NO

N O DONT YOU DARE MAKE THIS WORSE

Im. gonna cry more 

Doyhe kept an eye on him im so emo :(( but he thought he was doing well enough and gave up.... Im im so sad no i want you to make up and get back together its all just a stupid........... MEHHHH will i ever find sth like this flashback again

[mei: p-probably not, no]

i am so devasted i dont even wanna go back to the main couple just fucking. i want this relationship back :(((( but i guess the investigation might end up somewhere so hhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhh the baker manwha had a similar flashback feeling so. i just gotta find more of that haha

BUT THIS WAS SO SAD??? im so emo

[Dohye got kidnapped // the flashback commentary stops here but I think my descend into madness is pretty funny too]

OH YEAH THAT HAPPENED. THE FLASHBACK WAS SO LONG I FORGOT. NOOOO SAVE HIM. JESUS CHRIST PLS JUST ONE GOOD THING

its. actually rly smart to have another, more focused on them flashback, before the arc where he gets kidnapped by the rapist murder household so. good job. from a meta perspective but also NO but also. maybe theres hope for them making up at least after all :(((

[main couple kissing] this is. very weird now. but im glad he has someone, he deserves it but dohyeeeee

and switching to sex, YET AGAIN now i wanna see this EVEN LESS THAN I DID BEFOREEEE it's even.... a threesome now with one of the other characters why are you like this why can't you be. like in the flashback i am so upset HAHHHHH WHEEEZEEEE

I am just stop fucking jesus christ PLEASE I DONT WANNA SEE IT ANYMOREEEEE

im just stop the horny pls just tell me who that new guy is and why doyhe likes him so much

[mei: this manwha is a fucking mess but at least we got your lovely commentary out of it]

dhsuksj thanks i feel honored at least i got cute BL out of it before everything went [back] to shit

[mei: THAT TOO]

[...]

tbh im getting kinda mad about doyhe... i dont... feel like he'd just fall instantly for a guy who looks like Noah... but eh not my character

i just want closure for dohye at this point, fuck everything else ... not literally pls theres already too much of that

pls get it together for like 1 chapter is the investigation even still happening i am so confused save dohye plEASE wait what i have less than 10 episodes left Dont tell me this shit isnt even wrapped up yet

[Dohye is having a breakdown over the Noah double not coming to see him anymore]

yeah i this... doesnt feel like Dohye... at all... Even when Noah was rejecting him he was just kind of... taking it with some humor and maybe he was a little desperate and risky sometimes but... oh well... i do want him to get better but... im having a hard time believeing this development??? he never seemed overly anxious or anything. but who knows what else they did to him. Sister can still go fuck off tho

[...]

i mean. i liked the flashbacks a lot honestly??? it stayed simple and focused on the dynamics and less trying to balance smut with murder plots

[dm partner: NO THAT'S WHAT I MEAN LIKE CLEARLY THE AUTHOR CAN MAKE A GOOD STORY SO I'M JUST... CONFUSED AS TO WHY THEY DIDN'T STICK WITH SOME SOFT, FLUFFY BL ROMANCE MANWHA AND DECIDED TO MAKE WHATEVER THIS IS INSTEAD ]

okay i dont care bc dohye is currently getting assaulted nobody asked for this why i just. this is terrible. he was... so sweet. he doesnt deserve this. nobody does of course but jesus christ pls someone save him at least its not horny visually, one saving grace

ah... the assult is back to being depicted horny-ly thank you for nothing

[... removed some general confusion about the plot]

YES. SOME SHIP FOOD.

i am. suffering i mean i cant stop but GOD

okay so apparantly. the sister. has just an arsenal of people who look like other people Dohye, then Noah... and even Noah's GF??? this is ridiculous??

one good message 

why 

did you feel the need to add that [actual tired rage]

im gonna die this manwha is gonna kill me im laughing but im suffering oh hes arrested great and thats the end and the last update was in january of this year

why AS IN NOAH IS ARRESTED nobody who actually did anything is arrested What is this why is this AHHH I at least wanted the complete-ness of finishing this but now I'M JUST SUFFERING

[ mei: I MEAN TO BE FAIR I'D BE SUFFERING TOO BC JUST... WHAT THE FUCK I HAVE?? MANY QUESTIONS?? AND MANY CONCERNS BC THIS MANWHA IS JUST... AN EXPERIENCE ]

its an experience allright WELL

_______________

yup that’s it.

in my head, in a twist of events Dohye and Noah make up and are actual endgame. Something like that must exist out there but I won’t ask because it’d destroy the surprise and ruin the point.

That’s it.

Have a nice day.

[drunklander]

Drunj!Der Yells About Outlander

Thoughts on Ep. 501

We’re back again for another season of men never having to demonstrate any personal growth on screen because the writers don’t feel like that’s important to show and instead force the audience to just forget everything that previously happened because look! The characters, who aren’t real and are just what we write them to be, are all cool now so why aren’t you? #BadFans

As a standalone episode/series premiere of a new show, this episode was really good! I enjoyed it a lot, with some obvious exceptions. As the season five premiere of a show with a long history? What the actual fuck, why do you keep doing this, writers?

In season one, Jamie beats Claire, never actually apologizes for it, and we’re expected to be like oh lol it’s cool now. No worries.

In season two, Jamie takes his pants off with some prostitutes while his pregnant wife is at home, blames it on his “mission,” and we’re expected to be like oh lol it’s cool now. No worries.

In season three, Jamie is an asshole and a half to Claire when she gives up literally everything (including their daughter) to come find him and knowingly marries the woman who tried to have Claire killed because of one dance with random children at a holiday party, and we’re expected to be like oh lol it’s cool now. No worries.

In season four, Roger is a rancid garbage heap to Bree all season and is only begrudgingly down to stay with her as if *he’s* the one who’s been wronged by her, and Jamie literally sends a guy into what he thinks is like certain death/slavery without getting any real information, and we’re expected to be like oh lol it’s cool now. No worries.

So watching this premiere, I was not at all shocked that there was a convenient time jump where everything was so handily worked out off screen and we’re all super cool now, and Jamie thinking Roger isn’t good enough for Bree is played for a joke instead of being THE ABSOLUTE TRUTH. #BreeDeservesBetter

Anywho, onward under the cut because I’m back on my drunken bullshit.

Ooo, a rape warning before the episode, starting off very on brand for you I see, show.

Fuck them very much, again, for including that very unnecessary story line in the first place.

I miss Scotland, y’all. Also, young Murtz can get ittt.

So can old Murtz.

#TeamMurtz

This bit though with wee Jamie made me feel feelings. Jamie and Murtagh’s relationship is literally one of my favorite parts of this whole damn show and saving Murtagh was the best adaptive choice these fuckwads made.

Unpopular opinion alert, but I actually really like the new credits music. I will always like season one’s the best, but this one is up there.

Also, am I a giant weirdo for being happy that even though they change stuff in the credits all the time, they keep in the shot of Claire’s legs running from the pilot? Idk why, but I’m like sentimentally attached to that shot.

Also, that is a fucking microscope I see in the credits, are we gettING SCIENCE!JIZZ?!??!?!?!

SCIENCE!JIZZ! SCIENCE!JIZZ! SCIENCE!JIZZ!

“Careful, or ye’ll lose yer head.” And we’d all be definitely super sad if that happened. Yep, can’t have that. #TeamCutthroatRazor

Jamie threateningly shaving and insulting Roger is the fandom minus the stans who for some inconceivable reason still like that fucker.

Seriously, fuck Roger. Jamie is apparently the only one who hasn’t gotten amnesia about how terrible he is. I guess it’s because Jamie has been really fucking terrible many times and like recognizes like.

I fucking love that Murtz made Bree’s ring. Makes it more meaningful than the random trinket Roger picks up at the Gathering Without End in the book. Like Claire’s Lallybroch key ring was more meaningful than the book!ring. Fuck the show for ditching the Lallybroch key ring because tHe BoOk RiNg Is WhAt FaNs LiKe. No. Stop. Bad choice.

The aerial shot going over the big house makes me hopeful that this season won’t be as fucking claustrophobic as last year. Because seriously, we can all tell you’re still in Scotland. Doing a whole season in basically closeups doesn’t make it seem any more North Carolina-y.

CLAIRE MAKING BREE’S DRESS AND GETTING TO BE THERE FOR HER DAUGHTER’S WEDDING WHEN SHE DIDN’T THINK SHE’D BE ABLE TO GIVES ME ALL THE FEELINGS! CLAIRE DESERVES ALL THE GOOD THINGS! I JUST LOVE CLAIRE A LOT OK! SORRY NOT AT ALL EVER FUCKING SORRY! #BeauchampBrigade5Eva

Bree’s dress is fucking gorgeous. I lowkey like it better than Claire’s.

Da!Jamie on his something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue quest is fucking adorable. He also never thought he’d get to see this one of his kids’ wedding so yay for him too.

“And we’re giving her away to a man who loves her.” “Oh.” “What? You doubt his love?” “Um, I’m sorry, did you SEE all last season?! Did everyone else get amnesia?!”

Also, bullshit about Roger being terrible aside, this right here, with Jamie and Claire actually talking to each other in an adorable and snuggly way. Like being all close and cuddly and shit. THIS IS MY SHIT. When we all bitch about wanting more Jamie and Claire couple stuff and the writers are all like “but the sex doesn’t advance the story” it’s like no you fuckwits, we don’t always mean sex! Sometimes we mean sex, because sex is important in their relationship (and sex does not necessarily equal nudity), but most of the time we mean SHOW US THAT THESE PEOPLE LOVE EACH OTHER WITH THE SMALL CUTE STUFF LIKE THIS! I’m *rull* curious to see how much more of stuff like this we get this season now that Balfe and Heughan are producers. Balfe especially, considering how dirty they did Claire last season...

DA!JAMIE AND ANOTHER OF HIS KIDDOS! Da!Jamie being sappy and sentimental at his kids’ weddings is 100% my jam.

HIS FACE WHEN BREE SAYS JE SUIS PREST MAKES ME FEEL ALL THE FEELINGSSS.

MOM AND DAD ARE AT THEIR LIL GIRL’S WEDDING AND MY SKIN IS CLEAR AND MY CROPS ARE THRIVING. Except that one weed over there in the groom’s place that just won’t go away.

I am so fucking glad they did away with the Gathering Without End. I swear to fuck 17% of a book that’s just like camping and periods and breast milk is aggressively not my jam.

Unfortunately the groom being a douchenozzle is not a legal reason to object to a wedding. But it really should be.

Fersali being all snuggly and cute during the vows is fucking precious. I love Fersali. Protect Fersali at all costs.

I’m ok with playing Jamie and Claire’s music over Bree and Roger’s wedding because like, this is the culmination of all the shit that Jamie and Claire went through together and I’m all for making stuff just about them, haha. But otherwise, weird choice to not give Bree and Roger their own theme?

Also, I get that it’s a better choice to have a character we already know and have established stakes with be here to do the red coat stuff, but loool at the thought of the fucking governor coming to this random backcountry wedding. Tryon, buddy, I get that Murtz is your white whale, but you look obsessed in a bad way, bruh.

GERMAIN!!! I FUCKING LOVE GERMAIN! I FUCKING LOVE THAT JAMIE TALKS SHIT ABOUT PRESBYTERIANS TO GERMAIN! GIVE ME ALL THE SASSY SMOLS!

“Some of us like to think before we act.” Oh fuck all the way off, Roger. ALL THE WAY OFF.

“There was me thinking that you were just trying to shut me up for a minute.” I mean, that was an added bonus, Rog.

Sophie has really gotten so much better at acting. She’s always such a goddamn delight on press tours and I’m like *rull* glad to see her growing into the role.

Lizzo/Flute Lady from the Wedding Band 2020

I 100% wanna chill with JQM and Fersali. This squad of cool kids seems aggressively more fun than the dancers.

Oh Isiah Morton. If only you could keep it in your pants.

I LOVE FERGUS WITH MY WHOLE HEART.

I LOVE MARSALI POSSIBLY EVEN MORE.

GODDAMN IT I JUST LOVE FERSALI SO FUCKING HARD.

Seriously, the sass and theatricality and sarcasm of Marsali Fraser. I stan. I fucking stan.

Also I 100% kept reciting “To sit in solemn silence...” through that whole scene. Once a theater kid, always a theater kid.

Don’t be a buzzkill, LJG. I love that posh nerd. Except when he’s being a fucking creeper about Jamie to Claire.

“Mistress, can I dance with the guy I thought raped you because he was such a twatwaffle?” “Sure, Lizzie, go for it! Because we’re all friends now.”

We’re just leaning in on the dad stuff this episode. The hot dads of Riverdale should form a gang with the hot dads of the Ridge just for kicks.

Obligatory fuck the writers for including Bree’s rape. Since they did though, good on them for showing her PTSD. Although fuck them for including such a graphic flashback. Much like the choices they made in the season one finale, it centers the rapist and the act more than the survivor.

Can this please be the only Fred reference this season? Also love to lightly joke about an emotionally abusive asshole who treated Claire like shit and used Bree as a weapon against her. Claire, being the bigger person she’s always been, will obvs not speak ill of Fred to Bree (unlike how Freddy boy undermined Claire in front of Bree), but Bree is now aware of just how shitty Fred was. Even if he wasn’t overtly shitty to her, her still being all lovey about him, knowing what he did to her mother, is lowkey super fucked up. “Well I know he was shitty to other people, but he never did anything to me” is never a good look.

Bree hugging Jemmy, oh man, I just wanna give her a hug and tell her everything’s gonna be ok.

Jocasta is still trash (there’s no such thing as a benevolent slave owner) but this Murcasta scene is a goddamn delight.

OK BUT NOW I NEED FAN ART OF MURTZ AS A FAIRY KING!

Roger singing to Bree is cute and all, but then using the music for the whole montage is cheesy af and I don’t think I like it.

Is that Arch and Murdina I spy there in the crowd?

Marsali is literally the most fertile woman in the Colonies.

Grannie and Granda trying to get it on veryyy quietly so they don’t wake Jemmy is fucking adorable as shit and I lowkey love it.

Awww, poor LJG. I ship Lord John with someone who actually loves him.

Ok I get Murcasta having to break up because of his regulator stuff, randomly introducing Duncan Innes is a fucking weird choice.

Maria Doyle Kennedy really was the fucking perfect casting choice.

Oh hey, Josiah Beardsley. I was hoping they’d cut out the whole thing with the Beardsleys and Lizzie, but honestly, I’ll take that silliness over Emo!Roger any day.

Good on Jocasta for being a clever MacKenzie, but fuck Roger for only doing the right thing when he’s insulted into it. TL;DR: Fuck Roger.

Is Gerald Forbes going to randomly turn into Neil Forbes at some point like he does in the book?

DOCTOR CLAIRE FOR THE WIN GIVE ME ALL THE DOCTOR CLAIRE.

Srsly, I am here for Jamie shitting on Roger at literally every opportunity. Preach, Jamie. Preach.

“I’ll leave you to yer patients. And to wage war with your wee invisible beasties.” Seriously though, this is my jam. This playful banter. For so much of the series, it’s been like do these two even like each other? Because the writers kept trying to make the show into something it wasn’t. Politics, war, characterization flipflops and assholery FoR tHe DrAmA. It was so hard to see why Claire would ever pick this guy. I’m very cautiously optimistic that more shit like this will be peppered in this year because dammit, this is why we’re all fucking here.

“Then ye must find yerself a lieutenant.” Can it be Marsali? Please? Can Marsali be Claire’s lieutenant?! Because cutting the whole Malva bullshit would be ideal. And Fersali gets so sidelined in the later books that I’d fucking LOVE the writers to make changes so they can be more centered with the rest of the fam. And I am fucking obsessed with Claire and Marsali’s relationship. Marsali is the most Claire Jr. character in this whole damn show and I WANT THEM TOGETHER IN FRONT OF MY EYEBALLS.

Roger pricks his index finger but smudges the blood on Jemmy’s head with his thumb. Not the takeaway of this scene at all. But since I don’t like Roger, that’s my bullet for it.

Also I love that they switched the whole raise a militia thing to a hunt for Murtz & Squad rather than needing to do it because some randos are somewhere doing a thing and then lol jk they left so you can all go home like it is in the book.

Totally called it that they were going to combine the two bonfires and that this was when the kilt was gonna make its triumphant return.

Also I fucking love that it’s the music from Je Suis Prest during the scene when Jamie puts his kilt back on.

And thank fuck they didn’t put any dialogue/voiceover in this scene when Claire sees Jamie. It’s so much more powerful without it.

Aaand we’re burning a cross. At least they were smart enough not to burn a Roman cross, but they’re still burning a cross instead of just doing a bonfire. The scene could be just as powerful had it been adapted to not have a burning cross. Fuck them, tbh.

Remember that time that fuckwit Roberts tried to be like oh we’re not *really* burning a cross so we’re not racist but we’re not gonna address it directly because lol out fanbase is fucking wicked conservative and also a fucking cult who will yell at us for changing anything.

Because seriously that twatwaffle really tried to pretend like a celtic cross isn’t a religious symbol so they’re not having a KKK rally in this white supremacist hellscape. FUCK THAT GUY FOR BOTH HIS SHITTY DECISIONS AND ALSO FOR ACTING LIKE WE’RE ALL FUCKING IDIOTS.

BuT hIsToRy AnD tHe BoOk! Fuck that. Do. Not. Burn. Crosses. But they showed a lynching last year for the sole purpose of showing the shocked white people, so of course they fucking burned a cross.

Jamie being both himself and Colum from the Gathering in season one at the same time is a fucking sight to see.

The look on Knox’s face is *chef’s kiss*. Bruh you don’t even *know* who you’re dealing with.

Aaand in a move that is not at all shocking, Roger hesitates *again*, when Jamie extends his hand to him. Fuck, and I cannot stress this enough, that guy. I get that he’s untrained and scared or whatever, but buddy you deal with that shit tomorrow. You don’t fucking leave Jamie hanging when he’s doing this big theatrical thing in an effort to fucking save his land and tenants. Ugh.

FERGUS, SON OF HIS NAME AND HIS HEART! Jamie and Claire’s first kid getting the props he fucking deserves. ILY SO MUCH FERGS!

Marsali’s face when Fergus goes to give his oath. Just the pride and love there. I JUST LOVE THEM SO FUCKING MUCH OK.

I appreciate the commitment to the shitty green screen of that titular Ridge, haha.

That is a *rull* phallic rock in your circle, Murtz.

BUT...ALWAYS TAKE A MURTAGH! *cries*

This is a real gut punch of a scene, tbh. It’s 100% the right thing to do, but damn, right in the fucking feels.

This episode, with my selective amnesia activated per the above lol, has me more hopeful for how a season might be than I’ve been in a while. But this feeling has consistently been crushed in the past. Here’s to hoping the show finally stops doing us dirty!

[seb-owns-these-tatas]

What’s wrong? (Tj Hammond) (Pt.1)

Characters: Bi!TJ Hammond x Asian!Female!Reader

Summary: You're an overseas worker and is in a relationship with TJ, but people can't seem to accept the differences between you both even by financially and background wise.

Warning: Kisses. Public making out. Mention of threesome but no lemon. Lmao. HOT, SEXY GIF'S which can make your phone fly. No angst yet. Annoying racist journalist. Mention of doing the birds and the bees but it wasn't written. Heehee!

Words: 4000+ (IT'S LONG AF. 😂 There’s a part 2 which will be posted soon if ya want?)

A/N: I always tend to write long ass oneshots for TJ Hammond. Is this a good thing or a bad thing? Because maybe I'm the only one enjoying this? Lmao. GO BE CRAZY WITH YOUR FEEDBACKS, TATER TOTS! IT’S TIME FOR SOME ASIAN FEMALE READERS!

Disclaimer: GIF'S and pictures used are not mine. Only the edits are and the oneshot of course. 😉 Credits to the owners of the GIFS.

"They're not gonna accept me, Teej." Your heart sank from the moment those words came out of your lips, it was like a curse that made your heart feel heavier with every beat. Those were just the mere, honest truth that was inevitable to come out.

You didn't want to beat behind the bush. From the moment TJ asked you to be his partner for the engagement party that was soon to happen for Douglas and Annie, the anxiety crept up your heart, jumping towards your head that made you speak the honest truth.

You knew deep down that your ethnicity and your background was making it difficult for you, for the both of you and for everyone.

TJ immediately sensed the disheartened change in your voice as he was mindlessly trying to help chop the vegetables needed, standing in front of the kitchen island. On the other hand, you were preparing the beef for the Stir fried noodles you opted to make, in request to the whiny Hammond boy living in yours and his apartment.

You felt gentle arms snake around your waist and instantly you knew whose arms were that from. Tj leaned down, his head beside yours as he adjusted to your five foot one height. You felt his lip on your cheek, peppering soft kisses till he reached your ear. "Am I hearing you right? Was that a whine I heard? As far as I know, I'm the whiny boyfriend here," Tj whispered and chuckled, feeling his hot breath fanning against your ear made you quietly gush in his arms.

"Thomas! Stop, You know I got the tickles there!"

Tj felt the need to be playful, in account to your saddened state. He continued blowing at your ear, "Oh, so now I'm only Thomas to you?" Chuckles and giggles rang around your apartment. Joyful laughters that was perfect to record and watch at any time of the day. Tj haven't been that happy since his recent breakup. From a political fool who he thought had loved him, but end up abusing and using the love he has been giving in the end.

Despite of his crestfallen, past relationship, you suddenly came along. He was utterly depressed and went back to being a druggie. After months have passed of being clean, the addiction came along after the heartbreak. Yet, it was stopped once again from the moment you came along. Basically, you were the rainbow after his rain and he ought to see the light from you forever glowing.

"Hey, hey," Tj pulled you away from your wandering, negative thoughts. Never forgetting to give your head a kiss, feeling the warmth spreading all over your body, "You gotta stop being a pessimist," He cocked his head, an eyebrow rising as he collected his thoughts, "Just..relax, everything's going to be fine I swear,"

You turned the gas range off, sighing and whipping around once you did, meeting a very soft, sweet looking Hammond boy whose eyes were the prettiest out of all the blues out there. Your lip was now in between your teeth, biting the flesh from overthinking what was bound to happen soon. "You always say that, and I'd rather expect the worst, Teej because you're in a relationship with me."

"What's wrong being in a relationship with you? I don't find anything wrong about it," He sassily shrugged, caressing your hip with his thumbs in utmost tenderness, "Anne's Asian, from a different ethnicity but they don't get to say their complaints or problems about it, Y/N."

You bit your lip harder, eyebrows furrowing from thinking too deep, "Anne's from a wealthy family, Tj. And I'm...I'm..from trash,"

"Which I was lucky to find because I have rummaged a diamond in the dumps," He chuckled, his laugh sounding angelic to you. You fought off a smile, the anxiety was still swallowing you whole, making everything more complicated for you. "It's not funny, you're just making my anxiety worse,"

Tj had to put more effort in distracting you, and so he tried harder. "Come on, Baby. Lighten up, nothing's gonna happen, it's going to be a boring day for us because the party was probably a way to bring those stormtroopers all together," He licked his lips, looking at you straight in the eyes with such shine that could make your heart go all putty. "Just be my plus one, be the good girl you are while we suffer this together, Deal?"

"I dunno, Teej. What do I get in return upon agreeing to this so called...deal of yours?" You purred, tracing the outline of his pectorials bulging out of his tight black shirt. A lopsided smile on your lips.

"Hmm," Tj playfully hummed, his head falling till he reached your ear, never forgetting to give it a tender bite, "Maybe some steamy shower with me, I suppose?" The naughty Hammond boy suggested with a tiny chuckle, his voice dropping an octave lower, even with a suggestive tone that reached down inside your pantaloons, making you squirm in his grasp. "That is..if you're up to it?"

"But--how about the food--" You stammered, finding it hard to say no.

"We could always start with the dessert first, Love." and you certainly didn't object after that.

                                                 ✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*

Tons of people with class that were worth a million dollars came lounging in. Small talks, and fake hi's were their main objective. Wealthy, power hunger crocodiles seem to sound appropriate for their understandable behaviors. Other people appeared to enjoy communicating with anyone whom they can see as wealthy and famous, making them look like a total gold digger or a social climber who likes to be friends with people whom are high-class.

Everything that was happening around you was making you shake your head in animosity. Another set of anxiety creeping you in. How did you even end up in Tj's home when everybody had given you the stink eye, jealous, thirsty women scanning your appearance and history from head to foot if that was even possible.

They were probably wondering how Tj was in a relationship with a substandard woman like you who lived in the eastern part of the world. Well, Sexuality-wise..They were certainly stunned to see the former first son gay icon renegade turned miraculously bisexual, acting all touchy-feely and having thoughts inside their judgemental minds as to why he kept staring at you, looking all lovestruck and whipped.

"Y/N!!! Sweetheart!" You jumped from the huge, beige couch as you lounged beside your boyfriend. A half empty Martini in hand. You could see Margareth, Tj's grandmother marching your way. Her hips swaying with her heels. Her smile never fading once she saw how you still kept your relationship with her complicated grand son, Thomas.

"Tj's keeping you all to himself! This kid can be selfish when he wants to," Margareth complained, her voice shaky and senile but a little bit too hyper for her age. She never forgot to playfully smack her grand son's head, "Aw! Nana!" Tj complained with a sweet smile drawn on his face. A smile that Margareth remembered when he was still a child back in the white house.

Finally, she thought. It was time she got her grand son back.

"Hey, Nana!" You chimed, a huge grin plastered on your face. Truthfully delighted to see somebody whom gave your heart that warm, familiar feeling. Margareth grabbed you in a hug once you stood up to hug her. Yet, you were too slow to be first. "Y/N," She murmured as she cut the hug. Staring right back at you with a sweet smile while she reached for your face. "I'm really happy you keep my grand son in check and completely elated like who he was back then," Nana muttered, taking glances back at Tj who was busy chatting with one of Elaine's friend.

"Please, don't leave him like how that asshole did, Y/N. I don't know what he'll do next when you do, sweetheart."

"I don't plan to, Nana." You gave a crooked smile, adding a giggle on the end. Your words repeating inside your mind like a mantra. Did you really not thought about that? Margareth smiled, lightly tapping your right cheek with a laugh. "Good," She grabbed another Margarita from one of the waiters who were strolling around, promptly sipping on it. "You're perfect for this family,"

You fit in the family. But, that was in Nana's humble perspective. What about Dougie? Elaine? Especially Bud's point of view? Do they accept you though?

The party went on. It wasn't late yet, though as the time went on, more familiar people came in and began to join in the party. As an awkward human being, you stood on the middle of the floor. All alone sipping on your second Martini. Tj asked you to give him a minute because he had to talk to someone and probably get something in God knows where. You immediately gave your approval, giving him a sweet, innocent, tiny kiss on the lips before practically shoving him away before it took much more than you intended to.

Loud chatters can be heard, controversial topics that reached your ear made you want to raise a brow because of their judgemental thoughts that should be kept locked inside their poisonous minds. 'You sure they ain't putting up an act to cover Tj's real sexuality?' 'I bet he's using her,' 'Or probably it's the other way around, girl.'

'She seems like a lonely bitch,'

You crossed your arms against your chest, the anger bubbling up till it reached your head. Giving you a minor, temporary headache. In your peripheral vision, you could see Tj from the bar, talking to Nana and her circle of friends, with a precious smile on his gorgeous face. It was all glitters and rainbows in his part.

On the other hand, yours were full of shit. You cussed inside the back of your mind. The thick-faced women giggled and they were quite close to you. They probably intended to let you hear their conversation, to stir you up and mess with your temper. Especially that journalists and reporters were around, waiting for something to happen so they could add it in their drafts.

You ignored them the best you can. Nonetheless, there was always one person who'll irk you and even try to stir up the kindness in you that could change into rage. You sipped on your cocktail drink while staring at the piano in curiosity. Does Tj know how to play? You mindlessly thought inside your mind. Oh, you were about to know and ask him about it. There was a lingering warm presence behind you, and you instantly smiled from ear to ear. Speak of the devil..

However, to your surprise a woman with blue eyes stood tall in front of you. Appearing to have this sense of pride that she was one successful woman. You could tell from head to toe and it made you feel so tiny and unworthy that you were welcomed to join in the party.

"Will you be so kind to answer these questions that I have for you? Ms..??" The lady humbly asked, an innocent smile that hid behind a wicked scheme she had in mind. You couldn't even believe her. How can she ask for an interview from a person whom she doesn't know his/her name?

What a fool indeed.

"Y/N." You kept a short answer, a tight smile on show as you sighed out loud which made the reporter raise a brow from your dissatisfaction. How dare you act annoyed when you should feel delighted to be interviewed even though you were one substandard woman whom Thomas Hammond obviously made his worst mistake. The woman thought through her fake smile planted on her thick, injected lips.

"So, let's start off with something simpler, Y/N." She paused, acting all modest with the fakest smile you have ever seen. "Tj's??"

If she wanted to appear stupid, then it was best to say the stupidest answers as well. You breathed in deep breaths. Take it with your big girl panties. You can do this. You can. "Supportive wife?" You spoke as a matter of fact. Snorting a little when you saw her jaw tighten.

The brunette woman couldn't help but snicker, sneaking a tiny roll of her eyes. "I don't see a ring," She snapped, laughing to herself and eyeing you from head to toe. "Or a collar?" She smirked when you kept your hands on your sides, fists completely tight, trying hard not to make a scene. No. Never stoop down to her level, Y/N.

"Hmm," She fixed the lapels of her black blazer, "Obviously, you're the girlfriend. I'm not an idiot, Ms. Y/N."

Your nerves was seriously ticking like a time bomb that was ready to explode. "Really? You seem to be a much bigger idiot than me when you asked for my name, but the truth is..I know you knew who I was," You breathed out harshly, not wanting to start and send off rude remarks that could have endless rebuttals. "If I'm an idiot then why do I own a big advertising company..Unlike you," Miss reporter held her head high with her tall height, eyeing you from head to toe again like it was her nasty habit. "I don't work at any Ching-chong restaurants that spits rice, noodles or kimchi's,"

Well, that made you face palm.

"Do you have any more racist comments that could honestly move me? Because that comment sucks so bad," You held a finger under your eye, trying to wipe away imaginary tears. "Cry me a river, woman."

Tj laughed a boisterous one from what grandma Mercedith just said. She was one of Nana's bestest friend and a sweetheart indeed. Margareth noticed that Y/N wasn't with her grandson, and so she questioned.

"Tj, where's Y/N?"

The latter smiled, those smiles that held teeth and was too picturesque not to ogle at. Nana couldn't help but lift her lips too. "Oh, over there." Tj gestured behind him, towards where the party was, never looking back. Margareth glanced where he was pointing to and saw that Y/N is being interrogated by the infamous reporter slash journalist slash owner of an almost bankrupt advertising company who had no good thing to do but make false hypothesis about every issue especially when it was about the Hammond family.

"Tj," Nana started, sounding disturbed. "If I were you, I won't go leaving Y/N in a place full of sharks wanting to munch on a bait," She pointed towards where Y/N and Rosalie Sparks where. They seem to be exchanging heated conversations because she could see how Y/N was keeping herself together. "The Sasquash is on the move, honey."

"What?" Tj turned their backs away from them. A stern frown appeared to be on show for the folks to see. Finally acknowledging what his Nana has been saying and there they were. His girlfriend and an annoying woman who was planning to offend and get something out of his girlfriend. What was new?

"How's it feel to be unaccepted in the Hammond family? Especially that we know Bud doesn't take a liking on you because of how incompetent you are and how pitiable your family is," Rosalie Spark's chatted like what she was saying are compliments that was meant to fill the heart. Though, it was filling it with dread and anger. "Rich people deserve to only be with rich people too," She clucked on her wine glass with her fancy gold ring, grinning in the process. "While the peasants deserve to stay in the dumps,"

You zipped your mouth. Never stoop down. Never. Silence is the best way to talk back because you knew you were educated, matured and old enough to know how immature she was acting.

"I'm honestly disgusted by Tj Hammond's tastes are in women," She continued, more like talking to herself because you weren't speaking. "Or he's probably just confused for the second time and is actually really..reallyyy into men," The bitch exaggerated.

"Because if I'm in a relationship with you or--" She held her mouth, supressing a giggle that made you want to throw a glass at her. "--to be unluckily sleeping with you, I'll just be gay for all my life, Y/N."

You could feel your eyes turning hotter as each second pass by. God, you were such a pathetic baby. Why had you even agreed to go the party? Obviously because Tj begged you to come with him.

Not a second has passed by when you felt a warm presence snake beside you, and it took you long enough to realize that it was finally your Tj by the looks of his black dress shirt and all black attire. An arm moved around you, clutching onto your waist and Tj felt you were shaking. Probably from anger because that's just who you are.

You'd rather stay quiet despite of how people attack you, you'd rather be kind to rude people than to offend them back and that's how Tj knew you were one of a kind. A special one.

Before you knew it, your heart skipped a beat from the moment he held your jaw with his hand. Ushering your face to look at him, and with one dip of his head he had you enthralled in his spell that could calm you down in the sweetest way. Tj kissed you, right in front of that annoying journalist to probably irritate the heck out of her. He locked your lips with his, teasingly lunging the tip of his tongue inside your parted lips as he closed his eyes. Acknowledging the effect you could only give to him.

You couldn't help but envelope your arms around his figure as you kiss him deep, biting on his lower lip that made you both smirk from how she was certainly already uncomfortable. Physical contact makes people feel awkward. Tj preed his eyes open, seeing the woman with a pathetic aggravated face that made him chuckle as you both kiss.

Oh, she wasn't going anywhere is she?

Tj gave her a grin, never forgetting to give your lip a tender bite that made your insides go mushy and another sweet kiss that made your heart twerk. He was yours and yours alone. Only yours.

"Tiger twat," Tj answered so smoothly with that hot smolder as he looked deep into your eyes. Completely enticed by your spirit with an innocent smile written on his face that wasn't too innocent in your line of vision. You could see the grin and irk threatening to be shown on his beautiful features. Here, you thought he was calling you a tiger twat when it was actually sent to the reporter slash journalist who looked guilty because she seemed to be entirely shook.

"Isn't that your nickname in DC?" He finally gave attention to the tall, angry Sasquash who happened to rudely interview you.

"News spread so fast, Rosalie."

Your loving boyfriend grinned, a mischievous glint in his eyes that made her pride and dignity shatter like fragile chinawares. "What's it like to have teeth down there?"

"Your girlfriend's a bitch," Her ego was wavering yet that didn't stop her from trying to have the last laugh. Rosalie hardly bit the insides of her cheeks, remembering the awful night when the famous Tj Hammond who was out and wasted in his club and miraculously happened to reject her amazing, stunning self.

Oh, did she had a petty little crush on him so that was why she was acting so hostile towards you.

"No," Tj shook his head, a wicked grin threatening to come out and a lot of nasty sentences that could get her to crumble. "You're the bitchest out of all the bitch, Rosalie." He chuckled, his arm retreating from your waist as you saw him took a step forward till he reached her ear, bending down to whisper whatever he needed to.

"Don't come attacking my woman when you're still salty about that night," Tj harshly whispered on her ear, his voice turning an octave lower but definitely more harsh, breath hot and fanning, making her toes curl with want and hunger. "I remembered it so well," He chuckled, a sinister one. "I remembered how you were trying to get in my pants, yet my gay self didn't happen to find you attractive nor worth to fuck for a threesome,"

"Besides, I wouldn't want my dick to get chewed by that dry, loose, wrinkly, smelly twat, Sparks."

And just like that, she huffed and was in the verge of crying her frustrations out once she stomped her foot as she retreated. Making Tj form a wide smile that could make your insides turn a twist. What did he say that made the woman act like a bratty crybaby?

"Thomas," You started, seeing Tj walk back to you, enveloping his arms around your waist, leaning down to give you another peck on the lips but you were quick to maneuver your head, making him chase your lips with his. "Thomas," You repeated more sternly but quietly this time. He looked like he was a little smashed. Was he? you hoped he hadn't sniffed anything that could dissapoint you. "Nobody has the right to talk to you like that," He shockingly spat out in aggravation, looking deep in thought as he gorgeously stared into your eyes.

"What did you say to her?"

He shook his head, licking his lips as he whispered. "Nothing. It's not important, Sugar." His eyes was now trained on your lips, looking like he wanted to devour it all night. You couldn't help but smile. "Are you drunk?"

Your Tj drank in all of your beautiful features. Seeming to be mesmerized by your soul. "No, I'm not. I promise," He took a breather, caressing your cheek with his thumb. "I just love you too much. I can't stand them treating you that way,"

"Now, kiss me." He hastily puckered, dipping his head down for the third time and you were quick to adorably cover his mouth like the conservative person you are. "Tj, we're in the middle of--"

Tj didn't hide the roll of his eyes, showing you how much of a kill joy you were. "Do you think I give a damn?" He spoke against your palms, sounding muffled. "Y/NNNNNN,"

You internally rolled your eyes. He was such a baby. Your big baby. "Fine,"

He kissed your palms, planting a loud kissy sound that made people glance your way, his eyes turning adorable crescent moons once you dropped your palms off his lips. "I love youuuu," Tj puckered for the fourth time before grabbing your face in his hands. Kissing the daylights out of you in the middle of an engagement party. Apparently, it was Dougie and Anne's party yet it seemed like you were both having the engagement.

SCREAM OUT FEEDBACKS IF YA WANT A PART 2 OF THIS ONE SHOT BECAUSE THIS HASSSS A SECOND PART TO IT!!!!

XOXO, TATA

[wildflowerwattpad0217]

Clary Fray Gets Married. (My First Story On Wattpad) My Reaction After 3 Years.

So This story is going to be deleted from Wattpad on 12/18/2020. Due to how messy the story is. But I don’t reccomend reading it. So if you want to read the mess before then here is the link:

Clary Fray Gets Married

Masterlist

One paragraph is a single chapter

So Maia just got killed and Sebastian is back. That's a cheesy line. How would they be able to invite you to the wedding if they thought you were dead. Not that they would anyway. Clary is sacrificing herself for everyone. All these misspellings though, well it was my first story on here and I never edited it and I wrote it on my phone. That was short af. Well my original word count was 500 but later in the story I am pretty sure I switched it to my current 2000.

The incest plotline though, *throws up* I was trying to continue the idea of Sebastian thinking that the bloodline had to be pure. And Clary's pregnant. Jace's pov, the language was the worst in this story. Clary pov. Sebastian wants to make another demon child. Trama. Sebastian is a vampire but a new breed. Mark of Cain?

So we are starting this chapter with Trama warnings. Jace is blood thirsty and I don't blame him. This is the cringest this I've ever written and that's saying a lot. Clary made a run to hurt him. It can't be that easy.

Sebastian told Jace that was pregnant. Jace just cut of his head and he's still alive? These 500 word chapter get annoying fast.

Threatening Alec for Magnus to put up wards. That's one way to do it ig. You want the Infernal Cup too? Now he only wants Jace and Clary there.

Not much happened in this chapter but Sebastian raided Clary's closet from the Insitute.

A protective Jocelyn tho. This language is not how I would write this today.

It's like every other word is F*ck. This is so cringey. This is supposed to be first person pov not whatever you wanna call that. So much flopping back and forth between povs and I didn't make the pov change very noticeable either.

Really you're taking his head off again? Well it gave you time to get away ig.

This conversation feels forced. It doesn't flow right.

Clary is insisting on getting married before Sebastian can screw it up any more.

Magnus calling Simon by his actual name??? How did Jace just pop up like that?

What the hell was going on it that small pov with Sebastian and Lilith? "...revealing his father in a new form." Valentine? Wtf? Yeah it is Valentine and he hates what his son did.

Jace and Clary are finally getting married.

Valentine it pissed at Sebastian. Clary thinks it's halirious that he's a downworlder now. Karma is a bitch. Clary really just stabbed him in throat after he offered to help you kill your brother and Lilith?

Now why is Sebastian so worked up over a missing necklace? And Jocelyn just found out about Valentine and she shookth.

Jace has a half sister? And Luke has a niece? I don't remember this plotline but this story was all over the place.

Who is Lilith gonna bring back now? Carmen Herondale, Jace's sister.

Sebastian and Carmen reunited.

Sebastian never wanted this for Carmen? She's made at him but not for the reason you think. He was going to propose to her the night she was killed? Valentine is the reason she's dead? Clary just killed him.

Carmen is a murderer? And she got away.

I didn't even realize Simon didn't go.

Carmen you touch Alex or Max I will kill you.

He gave her the wrong spell thankfully.

Tessa is dead? The author's note was not it.

Even in a shitty fanfic Max is adorable.

Carmen's adoptive mundane father was a gang leader in Paris? What kind of crack was I smoking while writing this?

Simon compared her to Assassin's Creed. Why did Clary just pass out?

So the kid is basically going to be a full blown angel. Interesting. And the last thing she remembers is taking the pregnancy test?

That is some Twilight shit right there.

Aww Alec wants to propose to Magnus.

Her pregnancy is getting intense.

That line is so cringey wtf. Sebastian is back?

So I kinda remember the person who originally raised Lilith but tbh I regret writing Carmen's charcther because the next few chapter don't make any sense.

Clary's eyes changed colors. I really don't remember writing half of this because I was going through some stuff at the time.

The unnecessary pov switch tho. Clary just made a new Rune.

Magnus may have found a way to make Shadowhunters immortal?

Why would you try a rune on a trash can?

So everyone one agreed to going immortal. That would suck. And there was a rune made with the oil based paint Clary used. This is confusing af. I am sorry to anyone who has ever read this.

Max calls Clary, Aunt Clary. Wtf does he have to be so cute?

More Max being adorable.

Alec and Magnus are engaged. This makes me happy. Sebastian projected himself into the Insitute?

New Character is introduced: Emily Starkweather. Hodge's daughter and Lydia Blackwell's half sister and she hates her.

I made Lydia Blackwell very homophobic because I made Emily bi sexual and that's why they hate each other. Emily is traitor. Sebastian loves her? And is cheating on Carmen with her. This is very confusing. Emily is gonna teach Izzy how to cook.

Raphael got her addicted to Yin Fen. I really mixed The show and the book together. This bitch is lying her ass off to them.

Sebastian and Emily are planning to get rid of Carmen.

She's planning on killing so many people and pinning it on them.

Emily has some Trama TM

She is going to kill her mother.

Lowkey think Jace is getting sus of her. Carmen is dead.

They just found out she's a traitor.

Joyce, Luke, Myrse and Robert are all dead wtf and the baby is coming.

Emily has a good reason to trust Sebastian tho. He did save her life.

Lilith thought she was dead? Who do u think rose you from Edom?

They don't know Carmen id dead yet? Alec ripped into Lydia. Compared her to Valentine. Big ope. Emily is the 3rd Angel experiment.

Emily and Sebastian  are planning on kidnapping Lydia. Emily's angel blood is Lucifer's wtf? Emily called her sister a Stupid Ass Bitch and I'm living for it. And she's been kidnapped.

Sebastian just turned her? Ew. The left-handed joke. They summoned Lucifer for some reason.

Emily is absolutely crazy.

So she did kill her mother... I didn't make that very clear. Jace and Alec want them to make Amends so that she doesn't murder Shadowhunters. Sweetie I think it's far too late for that. Lydia is officially dead. How could she be preggers if she's a vampire? And now her mother is still alive? Jocelyn, Luke, Maryse and Robert are alive still too? Emily's mom admitted to everything. I also started going to 2000 word chapters.

Lilith is acting like a bitch, kinda. They are attacking the clave. Lilith summoned a shit ton of demons. The end of the chapter is kinda intense tho.

Raphael? Wtf are you doing here? Hodge?  They are testing by mortal sword. This is kinda confusing. Why was this the most read story on my wattpad before Avenging Riverdale?

Flashback scene to when they first met.

Then there was a short chapter. About a prochey

Time skip. The baby is coming. A blue and a black eye? Sebastian's eyes flickered green? Magnus wants to figure how to bring out the Johnathan in him.

Emily plans on making Sebastian stays Sebastian.

That was a shitty chapter.

And I forgot I discountinted it... Sorry about that.

Overall I am happy I discountinted you. It is a horrible book and I am embarrassed by it to be honest. This is my first book on wattpad so I think it's pretty normal but it wasn't my first piece of fanfic. My first work was on Fanfic.net but has since been deleted by the website. I don't know why it wasn't bad at all it was more fluff than anything. But I have decided that I am going to post this and then I'm going to take down the story in a month. I failed to put trigger warnings, failed to edit (to be fair that was back when I did all of my writing on my phone before I had am actual laptop). But I did have some good ideas when it came to the traitor part and Sebastian finding love and I deem this story on crack. So my final rating is a 2/10.

[yasminsqueendom]

Antique the Vamp Geek Pt1 Ep14

CW: Blood consumption, homelessness, violence, starvation, and the usual

A/N: Tique finally gets a guest on her show. And it’s not pleasant

W/C: 3267

Hey guys. So ummm…..I finally got a guest to join me here at the station. I can’t say I’m too pleased. I think my listeners will understand why when I tell you who it is. 

You might say, I’m meeting my maker?

Give a…..warm...welcome to Jules. He turned me. 

Yeah….

Jules: Well, thank you for having me here today, Antique. I know it took a lot-

Antique: You don’t know, actually. You don’t have a fucking clue.

J: Listen…I know I can’t apologize enough for what I did to you. You’ve lost a lot because of my carelessness. You never deserved-

A: What part of “you don’t have a fucking clue” don’t you understand. You ruined my fucking life. And, yeah, I get that I was drunk and there were other guys that were all over me, too. But they all moved on. YOU knew your status, and you took a risk that might have ended my life, but just happened to fuck it up instead. 

J: And I’m so so-

A: Fuck your “sorry.” I allowed you to come here because you’ve been a vamp for over 15 years. You survived a time when no one knew about us, and are surviving when everyone knows about us. I have baby vamp listeners that need help. You wanna atone for your fucked up ways, help them.

J:......ok….. What do you wanna know? 

A: How were you turned? And untwist your face. The best place to start is the beginning. 

J: Alright. Damn. I used to be a drug addict. I shared needles. Probably was dying from some virus or another anyway. I never used protection when I did things for money or drugs. I never cared if I was sharing needles. Death didn’t mean a damn thing to me. I was all the way out there. The “War on Drugs” kept me in and out of jail, but that didn’t do anything to stop me. I was reckless.

Next thing I knew, everything was hurting. I had stuff coming out of every end of my body. I was a mess. I went to this chick’s house. She let me stay there sometimes. She paid me whenever I needed money, and I did whatever she wanted me to do. I had stored some clothes at her house. I got all changed and cleaned up. I threw my old clothes out. 

It was still night time. I didn’t realize right away what was happening. Vampires were still a myth back then. I couldn’t fathom it. I thought I just had some bad drugs. I was out of it, but I still had drugs flowing through my system. Adrenaline and fear kept me moving. I couldn’t completely shake my high though, so I passed out on the couch. I still threw up on her couch and her bathroom floor. She threw  me out after that. See, she thought I was dying and didn’t want my body in her house. I couldn’t blame her. I didn’t fight her when she told me to leave. 

I walked around outside, and waited for the sun to come up. Slowly, I started to realize that I was hot. You know exactly what feeling I’m talking about. Like my flesh was on fire. And it got worse as the sun moved over my head. Blisters started to form on me and everything. I know I looked like a monster. I was lucky no one called the cops on me. Getting locked up at that point would have killed me….

A: Sorry to interrupt, but I’m curious. You have no clue who turned you? Because you were exposed in so many different ways?

J: Yeah, basically.

A: Did you ever try to figure out who it was?

J: There was no point. It’s not like I could blast them on a radio show…

A: Don’t start with me, bitch nigga.

J: Chill the fuck out.

A: You can leave, if that’s how you feel.

J: Is that what you want?

A: I want you to shut the fuck up. But I promised I would do this for my baby vamp listeners, and you’re here. So by all means, go on.

J: Anyway, I couldn’t take it anymore. I went into a clinic, and asked to be seen. Obviously, I looked a mess, so the receptionist told me to leave. She just saw a crackhead, probably coming in to try to steal some fresh needles out of the rooms in the back. Again, I couldn’t blame her, but at this point I was aware enough to realize that the burning had stopped. I was starting to heal when I had to walk back out into the sun. 

A: So, just to give my listeners an idea. Jules is dark skin, he’s got plenty of melanin to spare. So, Jules, how long would you say it took for the burning to become visible on you?

J: Um, it took a couple of hours for the blisters to start. I felt the burning very slightly at first, then it got nearly unbearable after about 3 hours. The parts of my body that were covered by my clothes were darker, but not yet blistered. It didn’t take rocket science for me to figure out long sleeves, and hats. Sunglasses worked, too. Hoodies, and jackets. Long pants, dress socks, and boots. I basically looked shady af all the time. You think cops are bad now, there were a lot less cameras then. 

A: So when did you know you were for sure a vampire?

J: After I killed someone. And they bled…...and I couldn’t help myself. I was starving, and they certainly didn’t need their blood anymore.

A: Uh….context is key here.

J: Basically, it was a few months after I turned. I went to various soup kitchens, and ate out of trash cans, but it all tasted like shit. Food, and even things I drank, tasted like ass.

A: Wait, so you could taste them?

J: I just said….

A:I KNOW WHAT THE FUCK YOU SAID! I can’t taste anything. Food literally tastes like air in my mouth. But you’re saying that you can taste it. It just tastes awful?

J: Well, yes.

A: Asshole.

J: What did I do now?

A: Exist.

J:... Do you need a moment?

A: No, keep going.

J: Right, so I didn’t crave drugs anymore. That was probably the biggest shock, after realizing I was a vampire, but that came much later. At the time, I was thinking I had a new lease on life, but I had already burned all my bridges. My family wanted nothing to do with me. I had no money, and I had to lift some clothes and shoes until I could had a couple outfits to change. 

It didn’t take long for the thirst to kick in. It started really bad those first couple of days after I turned. I drank all the water, soda, booze, anything I would get my hands on. Nothing made it go away. Eventually, I started to get thinner. I was already skinny, being a former crackhead, but I really began to look like a skeleton. I thought that I had HIV or something. I thought maybe it was cancer. I started feeling reckless again. Shit, if I was gonna die, I might as well do what made me feel good. Fucking, and smoking. 

I went back to my old bullshit, but my highs never lasted. It just wasn’t hittin the same anymore. Fucking, though, that shit got more intense. I know now that it’s just the virus picking up on a chance to spread to someone else, but at the time, I just enjoyed it.

A: And got several more people infected, I’m sure. 

J: Listen..

A: If you really thought you had HIV, why the fuck would you go around trying to infect more people? HIV has a much higher rate of infection than sanguinilis. 

J: I didn’t know anything about that at the time. No one would help me. The clinics turned me away.  

A: I’m not just talking about vampirism. If you thought you had HIV, why would you put people’s lives at risk like that??

J: I didn’t care.

A: Well, that’s obvious.

J: Did you bring me here to judge me, or to get information.

A: So far, all I’ve gotten from you is a fucking sob story.

J: What do you want from me? I apologized to you, I came here knowing how you and everyone else would feel about me. I don’t know what else to do. 

A: Help baby vamps. They need help. You can’t make anything better for the people you’ve fucked over. You can help people who need it. 

J: I don’t have any money, or influence, or anything worth giving.

A: Just keep talking then. I’ll decide what has value and what doesn’t. My listeners will decide what’s bullshit, and what’s not. Why did you kill someone?

J: So, as i was saying, I was starving. I had just had smoked, so I was in the peak of my high. I started coming down shortly after, and I feel someone’s hands all on me. Now, I was under one of those highway passes, and there are always homeless people willing to share space, especially if it’s cold out. 

Anyway, I woke up, and felt the dude I was sharing with trying to rob me. I considered just laying there and letting him finish. But, I could feel this fire building up in my stomach. Eventually, my throat started to burn, and my mouth felt so dry. I had no control over my impulse, I swung and hit him hard on the side of his head. He fell, and I got on top of him and just kept hitting him until he stopped moving. His teeth were broken, his lips were bleeding. I’ll never forget. He was the first person I had ever killed on purpose. I can’t speak to those I didn’t mean to infect, but I know that I had every intention of killing that man. 

So, yeah, he was bleeding out. I was thirsty. I knew he was dead. We always know when death is around. But it made no difference. His brain was gone, and his heart was on it’s last few pumps. I started drinking. It felt amazing. No orgasm could compare. No high could come close. I had all I could ever want right there, pouring down my throat. I went back to sleep, with his corpse sitting right beside me. I could feel my heartbeat speeding up. I never really listened to my heartbeat before. I realized for the first time that my heart rate was slower than normal. 

And in that exact second, it clicked. I was a vampire. And it was nothing like what I had read about or heard about or seen in movies. I felt amazing and awful at the same time. I now knew why I couldn’t be out in the sun for too long, but I used to love the sun. We all have our favorite foods, and now I knew that I would never enjoy them again. I knew that I had seen my reflection, so at least that story wasn’t true. 

A: And you still turned me, knowing that this was possibly going to be my fate?

J: I…

A: Just don’t. And I’m gonna pretend like you didn’t just say that was the FIRST kill on purpose.

J: Ok.

A: What kind of symptoms do you feel when you are starving?

J: I feel paranoid mostly. Like everyone around me is going to attack me at any moment. Sometimes, I hear voices. I feel a strong urge to attack, although not necessarily with the purpose of biting them. It doesn’t always feel like thirst. Sometimes, I just feel rage. I can’t really describe it. I have come very close to starving several times now. Each time is different. Although, that hasn’t been an issue for me for years now thanks to my connections. 

A: And you intend to share that info with my listeners, right?

J: I honestly can’t say that I do. Maybe a few places to go looking, but they have to do the rest on their own. I’m not going to lose what I have to feed anyone else. Maybe you. You look like you need it.

A: Shut the fuck up. I’m fine.

J: Uh huh. 

A: You’re an asshole.

J: Is that why you want to know what happens next? You want a peek into your future. 

A: Don’t flatter yourself. This virus is the only thing we have in common, and I refuse to let you manipulate me any more. You’re here to be useful, and if you can’t be that, then leave. 

J: You want the rest of the story?

A: Just tell it and finish.

J: I answered the last question already.

A: What did you do after? How did you link up with people to help you?

J: I mean. Without giving away too much, there’s a market for everything. If you do enough research, you can find anything. After the first few years of struggling, I got hold of a computer. The internet has kept me fed. I could buy and sell things without even having to meet anyone face to face. It didn’t take long for me to get a consistent plug who could provide what I needed. 

I still struggle with consistency today though. The demand has gotten higher since more and more people have been trying to get access lately. 

A: By struggle, is it safe to assume that you mean you fed off of people you knew? Clearly, you’re not above taking what you want. Did you even ask them if they wanted you to do it.?

J: No, I didn’t. How was I supposed to say “Hey, I’m a vampire” and get what I needed out them? 

A: You could have disguised it as some weird kink?

J: Don’t be naive?

A: Don’t be a little bitch.

J: Did you want to know anything else?

A: This is a waste of time. Why did you come?

J: I wanted to see you. I wanted to apologize to your face. But, I’m not going to put myself at risk of starving to death, to feed your “baby” vamps. I struggled. You struggled. All of us that make it, have struggled. Those that can’t just have to deal with it.

A: You’ve been sending me all these creepy emails about the night that you turned me just to come here and say that?

J: Oh yeah, almost forgot to say. I never sent you anything like that. 

A: You’re a fucking liar.

J: No, actually. I don’t always tell the whole truth, but I never lie. 

A: That literally makes no fucking sense. 

J: I didn’t send you any weird emails about that night. Yeah, I listened to your show. There’s nothing else like it. I like you enough, but I moved on from that night pretty fast. You wouldn’t let it go, and I wanted to clear my name of some of the shit that you said. But, at the end of the day, I didn’t remember much about you. I felt bad about what I did, and since you gave me your number, I was able to call you the next day. 

A: Stop. You expect me to believe that bullshit. You would be the only person to remember what I had on. You said you liked the way I looked in my dress.

J: I don’t remember what you had on. You looked good. You tasted good. But I knew you were drunk. And I’m not a rapist.

A: No… you just infect people who don’t know any better. 

J: Listen. I haven’t been emailing you a got damn thing about the night. I didn’t even remember who you were until I heard you describe that night. I wanted to come forward. So, when you offered to bring someone on, I took you up on it.

A: Well, then who the fuck has been emailing me?

J: I don’t know.

A: I don’t believe you.

J: I don’t care.

A: Fuck you.

J: Last time you tried that we ended up here. 

A: Get out.

J: Fine. 

A: I need a drink.

J: You can’t get drunk.

A: Why are you still here?

J: I don’t know. I guess I feel bad. I guess I’m kinda like your vamp daddy or whatever?

A: Don’t ever say that shit out of your mouth again. I swear on everything I love, I will end your life.

J: You’re not strong enough. I can see you, unlike your baby vamps. You’re not strong enough.

A: I fucking hate you.

J: I know. 

A:.....So that’s all that I’ve got for y’all today. Please, guys stay hydrated. I’m tired and I need to get off the air for a while. It’s the end of my semester, and that means it’s the end of my time here at my school as well. I do have some other things lined up, and I will definitely be active, but I won’t be posting for a little while.

Just remember that I love you all, and please stay safe. Stay moisturized. And stay hydrated.

Love Tique

*AFTER THE SHOW*

J: Listen…

A: DON’t FUCKING SPEAK TO ME! 

J: Will you calm the fuck down for a minute?

A: What else could you possibly want from me? After all this, what else can you take from me?

J: Nothing ok. I’m trying to help you.

A: Helping me would have been calling me a fucking uber that night! Not biting me. There’s no way you got enough blood to consider it a real feeding. You had to have been preying on other girls that night, too. You better pray to whoever the fuck you believe in that I can’t whip your ass right now. 

J: Shut the fuck up for a second.

A:....

J: I told you, I’m trying to make this shit right, you’ve lost weight. I’m a vampire, I know the signs. You need to feed. You need to keep doing what you’re doing. Talking to others out there like us. Educating others. I think what you do is important. And yeah, I’m an asshole, but it’s in my best interests to keep you alive. So here…

A: What the fuck?

J: It’s a bag of blood.

A: I know what the hell it is.

J: Take it.

A: No.

J: I know your naive, but you’re not stupid. I don’t get the impression that you’re suicidal either. So what is the issue?

A: You are.

J: You need to feed. Dying is the only other option. I don’t want you to die. I’m responsible for you….

A: So that’s it huh? You feel guilty?

J: I don’t want to be here anymore than you want me here.

A: Hold the fuck up. You tryna say someone made you come here?

J: I’mma leave this bag here. Drink it, or don’t. I don’t care.

A: Answer my damn question!

J: I’ll get you some more. Drink that. 

A: Got dammit! I said answer me!

J: See you around, Tique.

A: You don’t get to call me that.

 Jules leaves. Antique caves. The world keeps turning.

[the--blackdahlia]

This Life Chapter 3

Title: This Life Chapter 3

Summary:  Dean Winchester is the Vice President of the motorcycle club The Hunters. After almost 7 years in prison, he's free. But things have changed and Dean has to figure out how to put things back together. Kind of a Sons of Anarchy AU. 

Warnings: Language, violence

AN: Shout out to my awesome beta @callme-kaz2y5-baby !

Chapter Song: Sabotage by Beastie Boys

Dean had never really been a morning person before. Prison had changed that some though, and Dean was up with the birds. He worked out then, push ups, sit ups, everything. He used to make use of the fitness room while he was on the inside. He always felt better in the mornings when he worked out. Especially because he wasn’t sure what kind of food they were serving sometimes.

After a workout, Dean searched for some food, but realized that everything had been tossed out while he was gone. Instead of eating, he headed straight back to the garage. He wasn’t surprised to see some of the guy’s already there, screwing around like guys do. Bobby wasn’t there yet, and the other guys sure did have fun messing with the prospect.

“What the hell are you fuckheads doing?” Dean asked, parking his bike and walking up to them.

“Just having some fun is all.” Cas said innocently. “Caleb and Jim are inside. We’re just waiting on Bobby.” Dean nodded and made his way inside. Cas and Benny followed. Garth was drinking some milk, talking to Ellen. Dean got a water and took a big drink of it as Bobby walked in.

“Good morning.” Bobby grumbled. He nodded at Ellen, who left to go man the office. The guys all went to the meeting room to start the day before working on cars. Ellen sent Jo off on errands so she wouldn’t be tempted to bother the boys while they were busy. They all set down to go over the daily fun stuff.

After going over deals and other things, just when everyone thought they were done, Caleb had something to say.

“Dean, is there any chance that Sam got mixed up with SAMCRO?” Caleb asked. Everyone turned to look at Dean then. Sometimes Dean wished that Caleb wasn’t the Sgt. at Arms so he could kick his ass.

“Sam is not that stupid. He knows better than to do anything with those assholes.” Dean told Caleb. “Sam wouldn’t go near them.”

“Sorry kiddo. I’m just trying to explore all the options.” Caleb said. “We’ve been looking into this for months.”

“And why didn’t you guys tell me while I was locked up?” Dean asked.

“Because we knew if we did, you’d be angry and get into a fight or something and you’d be in longer.” Jim explained. “And don’t you try to argue with me boy. We all know it’s the truth.”

“I took anger management. I think I can handle myself.” Dean said.

“You sure about that brother?” Benny said, peeking out the one window with the heavy curtains.

“Yes I’m sure.” Dean said, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Well, I see one angry little bitch that’s gonna say different.” Benny explained. “Lydia’s here.”

“Lydia? Shit!” Dean growled. “What does that girl not understand about ‘it’s over’?” He stood up. “I’ll be right back.” Dean marched out the meeting room and headed out to the front of the auto shop, where Lydia was lounging around.

“She won’t leave.” Jo said as Dean passed by.

“I’ll take care of it.” Dean said. “She giving your mom a hard time?”

“A bit, but mom’s tough.” Jo told him. Dean nodded and headed out to where Lydia was leaning against a car, sucking on a Tootsie Pop. She smiled as Dean came up and pulled down the top of her shirt to show off her cleavage.

“What are you doing here Lydia?” Dean asked. Lydia walked to him, running her hands down his vest, over the new Vice President patch.

“I heard you just got out and I thought you might need a little female comfort.” Dean gently pushed her away, but she was right back for more. “Come on Dean. We were so good together.”

“You’re insane Lydia. Go home.” Dean said. “I’m sure Emma misses her mom.”

“She’s your daughter too, you know!” Lydia said. Dean shook his head.

“I highly doubt that since you were fucking three other guys at the same time. Now. Go. Home.” Dean growled. Lydia stomped her feet.

“You’re a piece of shit Dean Winchester!” Lydia screamed. “I hope you rot in hell!”

“You first sweetheart!” Dean said, walking into the garage where some of the other guys were waiting. Lydia sped out then, honking her horn loudly and flipping him off as she drove away.

“Damn.” Cas said.

“That girl is crazy.” Garth added. Dean shrugged off his vest and tossed it into the locker where he kept his work shirts.

“Can we just get to work guys?” He asked. He put on the oil stained shirt and adjusted it so it fit just right. The guys looked at each other and followed suit. “And somebody get the goddamn honor student to start cleaning out those trashed out cars so we can send them off for scrap.” Dean said, motioning over two the couple clunkers they had got for next to nothing.

“On it.” Garth said, going to find Kevin. Dean started in on the brakes of a Honda that had been brought in the day before.

About twenty minutes later, between Cas and Garth’s karaoke and hearing Kevin complaining about all the condoms and trash in the cars, another bike pulled up into the lot. Dean looked up at the guy that sat there as Caleb went out to talk to him.

“Hey man, who’s that?” Dean asked, motioning to the guy. Benny looked over.

“That Gordon.” Benny said. “Freelancer. Cut isn’t as good as the rest of ours, but we were running short and John and Bobby thought it was a good idea.”

“Dad let a freelancer in?” Dean asked.

“Well, his top gun was in prison.” Benny pointed out. “And Sam wanted nothing to do with it, as you knew.” Dean nodded and watched Gordon. Caleb and him talked for a minute before Caleb walked off. Gordon looked over, making eye contact with Dean, before he put his helmet back on and drove off.

“What was all that about?” Dean asked as Caleb walked by.

“He just wanted to know if we had anything for him to do.” Caleb said. “Don’t worry. It’s taken care of.” Dean looked over at Benny, who just shrugged and went back to the car he was working on with Cas.

Time seemed to go by slow. Dean took a break to light up a smoke and loiter around the office while the others passed around a bottle.

“So, when you guys...you know...do you wear the vest?” Kevin asked. Caleb choked on his whiskey.

“Is this kid seriously asking is we fuck with the vests on?” He asked. Cas laughed.

“Kinda sounds that way man.” The sound of revving engines drew the attention of the guys standing around. They looked up as about eight bikes rode by. The guys all looked up as about eight bikes rode by. And soon, the sounds of gunshots rang out, bullets flying.

“Get down!” Dean yelled. Ellen and Jo dove under the heavy desk. Dean grabbed the gun that Ellen always kept under the counter, and started to give chase. But his bike wouldn’t be going anywhere. He fired a couple shots but the bikers were already out of range and the guys were gone as quick as they had arrived. “Son of a bitch!” Dean said, looking at his bike. “Everyone okay?”

“Yeah, yeah.” Garth groaned. “Who the fuck was that?” Benny was on the ground and pushed himself up.

“Were you hit?” Dean asked, noticing some blood on him.

“Nah brother. Something hit me though.” He looked down to see a smaller body laying there in a puddle of blood. “Oh shit!”

“What?” Cas asked.

“They got the prospect.”

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[whorderofthepheonix]

Sacredly Scarred: Chapter 20 || Erik Killmonger

A/N: *sighs* may or may not be the last chapter. idk. depends on y'all. Enjoy tho. 200+ if you want the next part (and if it takes forever, Imma take forever to post ch.21 lmfaoooo) PLEASE REBLOG INSTEAD OF COMMENT xx

Words: 2k

Warnings: Swearing, Mild Violence, Vomit Warning, Lil Itty Bitty Angst, Cliff Hanger af

Erik’s POV

I pounded on the apartment door, eager for someone to answer.

“Erik, relax,” Yenai gasped. “You seem... Impatient.”

“Sorry, I just... Really want tea,” I mumbled. The door swung open and I was ready to pounce.

“Yenai! Erik!” 1 greeted. She looked fine... Like no sign of any injury or anything. Just an oversized yellow sweater and some leggings. “We weren’t expecting you.”

“Sorry to just barge in like this but Erik really wanted to join us for tea,” Yenai apologized, “and he insisted we come now.”

“Well tea’s not till 4,” she looked down at her watch. “But by all means, come in and join us for brunch! We’re out on the balcony.”

“Glady,” I pushed past them and onto the balcony. The other twin was out there, nibbling  lightly on a piece of toast. She wore an identical outfit to her sister, but with a blue sweater.

“Hi Erik!” She greeted. Yenai and 1 came in soon after. “Yenai too? Are you guys joining us for brunch?”

“Yup,” I said sitting across from her.

“Splendid!” 2 clapped. “Dorota! We need 2 more plates out here please!”

“So, Yenai, I’m sorry I couldn’t talk yesterday,” 1 frowned. “We were at the Marc Jacobs fashion show. They usually confiscate phones but I snuck mine in.”

“Well, it was a good thing you were dealing with fashion because I’m working with Vogue!” Yenai squealed. The twins gasped.

“No!” 2 gasped.

“OMG how?” 1 asked.

“Remember that dress I made with the tribal prints?” They nodded. “Well they saw it and loved it and now they want to add it to the Fall collection!” The 3 of them screamed and held hands.

“Congratulations!” 2 grinned.

“Yeah, we’re totes happy for you!” 1 added.

“Thanks guys!” Yenai laughed as the maid placed plates of bagels and lox in front of us. The moment Yenai saw it, she gulped. “Um... Is this raw?”

“Smoked,” 2 declared. “But very, very lightly. I hate when it’s not chewy.” Yenai started heaving.

“You good baby?” I whispered.

“Um, yeah... It’s just the smell,” she gagged. “And the look... and... I’m just gonna use the restro-” She covered her mouth and ran back into the house.

“Is she okay?” 2 asked.

“Yeah, she just has really bad food poisoning,” I said folding my arms. “So Marc Jacobs, huh? What was that like?”

“Like all the rest,” 1 rolled her eyes. “Been to one, been to them all.” I looked behind me to make sure Yenai wasn’t in ear shot.

“Does Yenai know?” I asked. They looked at each other confused.

“Know what...? About the fashion show? We just told her,” 2 raised an eyebrow.

“Cut the shit!” I hissed. “You know damn well you weren’t at no fuckin’ fashion show last night!” 1 took out her phone and opened her snapchat.

“Look from 7:30 PM until 11:29 PM we were at the fashion show then we went to the after party,” she said. “Am I missing something?”

“Now, I’m confused...” 2 frowned. “Where did you think we were?” Maybe I got it wrong... Maybe it was just a coincidence... But I was sure it was them... I sat back in my chair and look a bite of my bagel.

“Forget it,” I sighed.

“Hey, I LOVE your watch!” 1 gasped. “Rolex Chronograph right? Our dad has the exact same one!”

“Yeah, he’s been collecting since before we were born!” 2 added. “Come, we’ll show you!” They both got up and I followed them through their bedroom and into one of the closest. A giant wall full of watches was right above a smaller case with more watches.

“There are 320,” 1 spoke. “We only take them out to wear as good luck or on Sundays to have Dorota clean them.”

“It is Sunday,” I pointed out.

“Oh fuck! It is!” 2 groaned. “I’ll get Dorota.”

“I’ll go check on Yenai,” 1 said. Then they both left the closet. I looked carefully at each watch. Ther were all accounted for. Well there goes that theory... I looked around the closer which was filled top to bottom with expensive jewelry and clothes. Just as I was about leave, one of the watches in the case caught my eye. I opened the case and picked it up. It looked almost identical to mine, it just had lower case letters instead of uppercase, like most Rolex’s do... I heard footsteps so I scurried to put back the watch, causing me to fumble and drop it on the floor. I bent down to pick it up from under the case, accidentally grabbing something else instead. A brown paper bag. I slowly opened it pulling out a bloodstained shirt and a clown mask. That’s when I heard a clicking sound from behind me and someone clearing their throat. I sighed and raised my hands in surrender, getting up and facing the door. 1 had a rifle pointed to me while 2 had her arms folded across her chest.

“Pardon me sir,” 1 smirked. “You have something that belongs to us. I’d like it back.”

“I fucking knew it,” I laughed. “So you two are the little fuckers who’ve been fucking with my assignments.”

“We haven’t been messing with anything,” 2 pointed out. “We get calls and we go. The same as you.”

“So I’m just supposed to believe that you two, fucking pris and perfect, are assassins?” I laughed.

“You’re damn right!” 1 snapped. “Now give me the fucking watch!” “Fuck no! You gave this to me and I didn’t kill ya ass!”

“You shot my sister!” 1 yelled.

“Twice!” 2 growled. “In the same spot!” “Well, I was letting you go and you threw a knife at me,” I shrugged.

“Enough fucking talking!” 1 hissed. “Hand over the watch. It was my dad’s favorite.”

“Hmm... No. Fuck you,” I dropped my hands.

“I mean it!” She shouted. “Or I’ll-”

“You’ll what?” I walked over to her. “Aside from killin’ niggas I also deal in weapons. You don’t think I know a paintball gun over an actual rifle?” She sucked her teeth and dropped it.

“Fine, whatever. I had to leave our weapons at the warehouse last night to get Ayana to the hospital,” she rolled her eyes. “Just... Please give me back the watch,” she begged. “Despite all the watches on the wall, that was the only one that belong to our dad...”

“Aight, I’ll give you back the watch, under one condition,” I smirked.

“Nigga, we are not having sex with you,” 2 crossed her arms.

“If it means getting the watch back, yes the fuck we are!” 1 glared at her.

“What the fuck? No! That’s not- Never mind,” I groaned. “I’ll give you back the watch if you agree to cut off whatever nigga you workin’ wit and work for me.”

“What?” They asked together.

“You serious?” 1 asked.

“Fuck yeah, I’m serious,” I nodded. “Y’all can fight. Plus we can use y’all for baiting niggas out.”

“He’s actually serious,” 2 gasped.

“How much money you make in a week?”

“I don’t know... 200 maybe 300 grand on a good week,” 1 shrugged.

“I once made 2 mil in one night,” I told them.

“Holy fuck!” 2 exclaimed. “2 million fucking dollars? Alyssa, do we even have to pretend to think about this?”

“Hell no!” 1 laughed extended he hand. “It’s a fucking deal!” I shook her hand and took the watch off my wrist giving it to her.

“We’re in business then,” I smirked. Then Yenai walked in, looking confused and scared.

“Um... What’s going on here?” She asked, warily.

“Nothing,” the three of us said in unison.

“Yeah, okay. I’ll pretend to believe that,” she rolled her eyes. “Girls I’m sorry, but I have really bad food poisoning and I can’t keep anything down. Erik can we go back upstairs?”

“Sure thing, baby girl,” I walked over and kiss her head. “Let’s go.”

***

I’ve had a weird feeling about Yenai since the day we had brunch with the twins. And it wasn’t just from her being sick. Like now, it was day 3 and she was STILL throwing up! She had to call in sick from work, which her boss eagerly gave her. Yenai guessed that she was still embarrassed from dinner the other night. That was the last real conversation me and Yenai had... THREE DAYS AGO! Everything else was all responses and simple questions. And when they weren’t responses or questions, they were bitchy remarks or constant nagging. I came from meeting with the Twins, whose names are apparently Ayana and Alyssa, and walked into the house.

“Baby, you home?” I called out. She walked out of the bathroom.

“Where else would I be, Erik?” She rolled her eyes. I bit the inside of my cheek to stop myself from replying rudely.

“The twins made you soup,” I offered putting the bowl on the counter. “They said it helps nausea.”

“You were down there again?” She scoffed. “You’ve literally been down to see them everyday since brunch!”

“Is that a problem?” I asked, folding my arms.

“If you previously hadn’t tried to fuck them then no, it wouldn’t be,” she snapped, taking the bowl of soup and throwing it in the trash.

“Yo, the FUCK is ya problem, Yenai?” I shouted as she retreated to the bedroom. I followed her and closed the door.

“My problem Erik, is that instead of staying here and making sure that I’M okay, you’re off galavanting with MY friends!” She shouted back.

“Well maybe I’d want to be around her more if you weren’t being such a bitch to me all the fuckin’ time!”

“Oh word?! I’m a bitch now? Riiiigggghhhhttttt! Copy!” She stormed into the closet and started grabbing her clothes off the hangers. I took a deep breath and leaned against the closet door.

“What are you doing?” I groaned.

“Since I’m such a fuckin’ bitch, there’s no use in me staying, right?” She shrugged, opening a duffle bag and stuffing the clothes in.

“So first of all, ya ass don’t got a place to go, so let’s cut that shit out aight?” I took the duffle from her. “Secondly, you gon just pack a bag and leave every time we get into an argument? You gon be doin’ a lot of packin’ and unpackin’ ma, I’ll tell you that.”

“Fuck you,” she spat pushing past me, going back into the bedroom. I grabbed her wrist. “Get the fuck off me.”

“Nah, you not goin’ nowhere till we deal with this shit, Yenai. I’m not bouta keep quiet everytime you snap at me or yell wit ya stank ass attitude. We gon sit down and talk like fuckin’ adults.”

“I have nothing to say-”

“The fuck you don’t!” I snorted. “You got allat mouth when I try to help you and now you got nothin’ to say. Nah.” I wrapped my arms around her. “Tell me what’s on ya mind, baby girl.”

“Get off me,” she whispered, her voice cracking.

“No. Talk to me,” I insisted. She looked at me with tears in her eyes. “DId I do something wrong?”

“No,” she sniffled, letting tears fall. “You didn’t... I’m sorry I’ve been such a bitch...”

“It’s aight... I’m not bouta force you to tell me what’s wrong, but we can’t keep goin’ like this, Yenai...” I sighed. “When you ready, you gon tell me right?” She shut her eyes and shook her head.

“I can’t! I can’t tell you!” She cried. “I’m scared...”

“Why can’t you tell me? What’s scaring you?” I asked cautiously. She kept shaking her head, sobbing.

“I can’t...”

“Yes, you can.”

“No, I can’t! I can’t! I can’t! I can’t!”

“Yenai-”

“No, Erik! Just stop! Please!”

“Baby, please talk to me-”

“Erik!’ “Why are you so scared?!”

“BECAUSE I THINK I’M PREGNANT, OKAY?!” She screamed. I heart stopped and my blood turned cold. “...I think I’m pregnant and I’m scared...” She whispered. “I’m so fucking scared...”

~~~

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[staliasjeronica]

Riverdale 3.02 Thoughts *Spoilers*

- Poor Archie... But omg Veronica in her Pop’s uniform, and the hot Riverdale dads all meeting up I’m in LOVE

- I’m so sorry you got the Midge treatment, Dilton... rarely seen and then the second you’re relevant you’re killed off. You didn’t deserve that

- So... after Betty has a seizure NO ONE stays with her to make sure she’s alright? Jesus she must be that annoying to be around lmao

- Wells Jaha got fucking RIPPED. Holy fuck. But if he ends up leaving the prison (somehow) with Archie, and not Joaquin, I will literally rip out my hair. ALSO Archie looks fucking amazing omg that outfit though... boys with sweatpants do something to me lol

- Oh no they’re suddenly going to make Veronica a bitch and look bad, and use the excuse of Archie being in jail to justify it... Veronica isn’t Betty, leave my queen alone she’s never been anything but nice to Cheryl, don’t make her randomly be mean now 🙄🙄

- Archie using his fake Serpent tattoo to get a seat at the Serpent table... was amazing bye

- JOAQUIN!!!! He totally is the Serpent King here isn’t he? What a fucking G. But if he has been here since riot night... he wouldn’t have been been there if he stayed. He probably stayed for Kevin (please go save him he’s about to sex it up Moose Mason 😷😷😷). Please don’t suddenly make him an annoying bitch ass because I’m my head he’s a sweetie pie.

- I know Archie’s a good guy but “I don’t need your protection that bad” we fucking know he’s going to need it in like five seconds...

- *ghoulies walk up, angry for him getting them in jail at the drag race* “look, guys, I don’t want any trouble” ARCHIE... I don’t think they’ll care. Also why does everyone want his shoes. I know it’s a prison thing I guess but like... Jesus.

- Evelyn Evernever is so fucking pretty and her voice?? I like it, I don’t know why

- Ew it’s Moose. SURPRISE KISS FROM KEVIN WAS SHOCKING BUT TOTALLY A KEVIN MOVE! But Moose if you slam him against that locker to shove him away from you again I will literally break Joaquin out of jail just to beat your ass to a pulp. Also, I thought Kevin knew he wasn’t ready and was going to wait so why is he suddenly trying to show PDA in school? Maybe he’s trying to make Moose give up on him so Kevin can be free lol

- “I don’t work here, I own it. And as of this moment, you’re not welcome here” Um hi we don’t want Veronica to turn into Betty, so can we not suddenly make her the mean girl again just because she’s not president in Archie’s spot? Thanks. Although “you cannot discriminate against someone because they’re better looking than you” UM VERONICA DID YOU JUST CALL THE QUEEN... TRASH? Cute little funny insult but why don’t you use this bitchy-ness on Betty, the only person who deserves it?

- Veronica and her mom still having a relationship makes me happy because before this I always figured that Hermione would be too afraid to not choose Hiram over her. But this makes me happy to see.

- Ethel. Queen Shannon Purser (despite the toxic role of Sierra Burgess)!!!! But I don’t miss her on here, I’m still mad about her throwing a milkshake at my queen Veronica (and Josie still has to apologize to her for making up that shit for the flier)

- oh look, Jughead finds out about something Betty kept from him... and it’s not going to make him get her ACTUAL help or trigger the other shit she’s kept and break them up... literally Jughead is actually almost likable and you just need that little bit to make him more realistic and likable. BUT FALICE, INSTEAD OF DOING THIS SEPERATELY, THEY ARE ALREADY TOGETHER. Bet they were doing something... sweaty and fun

- so... Betty is mad at her mom for telling her the truth? Jesus Betty can you be anymore of a dramatic bitch? Although I’m glad that she stopped Jughead and made them go home. For once let Betty deal with something without Jughead because she does stupid shit because of him

- Reggie 😍😍😍😍😍😍

- like... I wanna like Archie’s plan because that would mean Joaquin would play but... it sounds weird and stupid, but oh well. It’s better than anything Betty could pull out of her ass so

- “if that’s weird tea from the farm, I don’t want it” for once in your life can you just shut the actual fuck up betty Jesus Christ... although what a cute tender moment between Alice and Betty. For once.

- BETTY JUGHEAD ACTUALLY REALIZED THAT HE WAS WRONG TO BRING YOU INTO THIS SHIT AND YOU TELL HIM THAT HE WAS RIGHT TO? Maybe... just maybe... you need FUCKING HELP

- I was about to ask why Jughead hasn’t visited Archie in jail, but then I realized that Jughead became a little prick last season and attacked him all because he was on “Veronica’s side”

- “Moose, are you ashamed of me?” “No... I just... I’m with the guys.” He doesn’t deserve you Kevin! Maybe if someone would tell Kevin the love of his life is in Juvie he would go visit him and not Moose

- “that’s my girl” 😍😍😍😍😍😍

- I’m still not sure how I feel about the dancing at the jail though... like... those guys probably haven’t seen girls in forever and uhhhhh yeah. Also, wouldn’t they have to get in and whatnot to do all this with the guard’s permission because they look surprised. Like, I’d be thinking that this was a distraction for a jailbreak or something lol

- of COURSE the warden is a friend of Hiram’s...

- “as disrespectful as you’re being—“ she’s not being disrespectful Hiram shut the fuck up lmao she’s dancing and cheering on her boyfriend

- of COURSE the guards make it a riot.

- DON’T HURT JOAQUIN 😭😭😭

- Everytime Cheryl talks about her road trip with Toni, she basically remembers all the mind blowing sex that we sadly didn’t get to see OML

- “Ethel were here to help you but you have stop lying” coming from Betty... who lies about the smallest of things lmaooooooo let Jughead do the talking

- Ethel’s seizure looked... weird but okay. Tbh this is why I can’t be an actress— I would laugh so goddamn hard because I laugh at everything

- YES VERONICA WE LOVE A DEDICATED GIRLFRIEND

- Kevin... no. Moose isn’t fucking worth it!!! Moose looks so pissed at him too like... KEVIN ISN’T IT CLEAR THAT HE JUST WANTS A WARM MOUTH TO FUCK (I can’t ever not say those words when it could be applied thanks to Mickey Milkovich) HE DOESN’T WANT TO ACTUALLY DATE YOU

- Archie you don’t ask the bad guy about his plans when he could easily kill you and no one would bat an eye... WHAT THE FLYING FUCK DOES IT MEAN TO BE TAPPED OMFG

- if the parent’s secret is that they either started this shit (the game, somehow, the drug blue lips thing, or something like that) I’m gonna be so pissed because that’s stupid af

- Ben’s suicide was... wow. I mean I don’t know why they didn’t slowly approach him because clearly he wasn’t threatening to do it if they got closer, but still... Jesus Christ. Since that’s yet another traumatic event that Betty has witnessed can we PLEASE get her into therapy and away from Jughead so he can stop adding her into his stupid fucking crime-solving boner-inducing mysteries?

[assholemurphy]

i am incredibly sad that i only have like, 1 extra adderall left (i may have to find somewhere to buy more from, since i only get like, enough for the month with my prescription, the only reason i had extras this month is bc it took a week for me to be able to get my prescription filled, so i literally had to go a week w/o adderall and i don’t wanna do that again, ever, it was hell, esp bc i ran out of sudafed, too, that week) bc holy fucking shit am i awake. i’m getting so much done. i took a shower and then highlighted all of the units in my script, which is usually hard to focus on bc it’s so dull, and i got another 15 units done, so i’ve only got like 30 left and i’m still wide awake and focused AF. like, i’m p sure that colors have smells, but also, like, the world is so intense and amazing. i feel fucking fantastic. i kinda wanna go skydiving, but like, not until i get my hw done, ya know?

but i’ve got 30 more units to do, then i’ve gotta make a graph, but after that, i’m done with the project and can move on. depending on how i feel/what time it is when i get that done (bc if it’s past 3:30/4a, i can’t sleep, i’ve got to stay up bc if not, i won’t wake up in time for class, but also, if i still feel this awake, then there’s rly no point to sleeping bc i won’t be able to, anyway) i might sleep, or i might start working on my playwriting assignment (bc that’s due mon @ 2p and i’ve got to write 6 1-min monologues for my characters) and watch the first 30min of shrek: the musical (bc i gotta have that done by fri @ 9a bc we’re watching it in class and that’s where we’re picking up at since the audio wouldn’t work in class, so it’s hw to watch the first 30 of it, but we can watch all of it, if we want, idk if i will, i’ve got too much to do and if i watch all of it, then there’ll be no point of going to class bc i hate rewatching things bc i’ve got a damn near eidetic memory for movies/books and certain other things, depending on how much i’m paying attention, but almost always books/movies unless i find them boring and don’t care abt them, so it would be stupid to watch all of it and then be bored in class), then maybe read some of after the fall (the script i’m pulling my monologue from for acting i) and do the assignment that goes with that (bc it’s due tues @ 9:30a). after that i should do my therapy hw (we’re still working on stuck points and i’ve got like, 5 more sheets, maybe more, to fill out) bc that’ll be due at my next counselling appt, which i think is next week, i’ll have to call them, but it’ll take abt an hour and it’ll emotionally drain me.

i think that’s abt it for hw, tho, but all of that’ll take roughly 9 hours, which means i def won’t be able to do it all tonight, but i can get most of it done if i don’t sleep, which means i’ll have more time for sleep/writing/literally everything else on the weekend. i might even be lucky enough to be able to get drunk. maybe. i’d have to start drinking at like, 3p and stop at like, 6p for it to all be out of my system so i can get to bed by 2/3a. so that’s a maybe. but a nice maybe.

ofc, i’ve got non hw stuff to do, too. i’ve got to make a list of roommate requirements so i can start looking for a new one (i’ve also got to talk to goldilocks to see when she plans to move out, bc like hell am i moving out, all the bills except her half of the lease are in my name and most of the furniture (aside from her personal stuff and the coffee table) is mine and i don’t want to have to move ALL of it out and into a new place, plus it’s her decision to not be roommates, so it’s on her, not me, and i won’t budge, not this time). then i’ve got to get my study/organization binder made so things’ll be easier to keep track of. i’ve got to do some cleaning (taking out the trash, cleaning up my side of the living room (we didn’t divide it, it’s just where the couches are so we stick to our couches most of the time) and the coffee table). then laundry, gotta do laundry, i’m almost out of socks.

ofc, i might have to start on my part of the second part of the group project. i wanna design costumes for the play, if neither of the others is doing that, which i hope they aren’t, bc i don’t know enough abt any of the other elements of production to do something else. but if i have to, i can try to do sound, maybe, that’s my second choice. so, i may have to start on that this weekend. i’ll talk to hurricane bianca and tim the toolman taylor and see what they’re doing for it probs on fri if not tomorrow at rehearsal. then i can start on my part and get it finished ahead of time to prove i’m capable, when i’ve got my shit together and am not having a breakdown every week. then, after i talk to prof j abt what i’m supposed to do for the show (something with finding times for freeze frames and spotlights, which is fun, but i’m worried my comdic timing isn’t the same as everyone else’s bc i’m autistic, so my sense of humor is a bit skewed, ya know? but anyway, prof j specifically told goldilocks (who is stage manager, i’m one of two assistant stage managers) to have me do it, so i’m afraid i’m being set up to fail bc i know nothing abt theatre, rly, and i’m always paranoid abt these things, but i’m also kinda thinking it might be bc she actually thinks i can do it, which sounds unrealistic, but she’s not a mean person, so i’m willing to bet it’s that one. but i need to ask her what all she needs me to do, bc goldilocks has no clue, which was so fucking helpful, what a great stage manager she is (no, srsly, idk if i bitched abt this earlier or not, but she’s absolutely horrible at this shit so far and i can’t stand working under her bc i hate working under incompetent ppl bc i feel it makes me look incompetent, too, if the job isn’t done right, even if it’s not my fault bc i wasn’t in charge and i’m always, always terrified to look stupid or incapable in the eyes of others). so, i’ve got to ask prof j abt what all i need to do bc i’m p sure the advice given to me by the lighting tech (who is apparently a decent stage manager, tho i doubt it, truly, she doesn’t have the personality for it, she’s too pushy and it makes her hard to work with, but that might just be bc i don’t like her as a person, so i’m reserving judgement until i see her in the position) is wrong bc it makes no sense, is way too hard, doesn’t actually help with anything and gives me a headache (bc mapping out the goddamn blocking is impossible when the actors do diff things every fucking night, wtf??? do the same shit, you assholes! but it’s also useless bc it doesn’t tell anyone where the spotlights/freeze frames should be, and blocking isn’t my job, it’s the other asm’s (who i don’t have a nickname for, but will probs have before the end of rehearsal) so why she’s not doing it, idk???) so i’ll ask tomorrow.

so, i’m looking at 9 hours hw now, then 30 min of cleaning, 3 hours of other paperwork shit, and potentially 4 hours of hw and 2 hours of theatre stuff this weekend. which means i can get at least 10 hours of sleep per night and get some writing done, if i finish most of my hw now. i think that’s worth one sleepless night. it rly is. so, here’s to hoping for at least one day off this week.

but if i don’t sleep, i’ll probs crash after rehearsal tomorrow night, unless i can convince my friends to come over and hang out, since they won’t be here this weekend and i kinda need their help making the roommate requirement list bc otherwise it’s just gonna be like ‘can’t leave time on the microwave after they’re done using it’ and ‘must know how to use headphones when others are studying in the living room’ and ‘must not whine when i want to stay in my room and do work instead of being around them 24/7′ (tho, goldilocks doesn’t spend much time with me anymore, which is fine, i guess, but it’s a complete 180 from what she used to do and honestly, i’m offended bc i caved and started staying in the living room and now it just feels weird not being in the living room and idk what to do abt any of this). i need real things, too, like, big concerns that i’ll forget abt when writing it, and i need to know if my requirements are petty or things that aren’t specific to most ppl, just goldilocks. and it’d be nice to hang out with them and shit.

anyway, this is rly long and rambly, but i rly need to vent all of this shit somewhere, it helps me sort my brain out. i don’t actually expect anyone to read it and you can always blacklist my personal tag ‘iz says stuff’ if you don’t want this shit on your dash. but if you do read them, then you’re always welcome to come to my inbox and be like ‘quit bitching and get back to work, dumbass’ or something. 

[videograhams]

dating eddie miller would include / being in hoa headcanons

i wrote these so long ago lmao but for @thatfinalsibuna :)

THESE ARE TERRIBLE LMAO

he's a leo/cancer cusp.

he tries to keep sibuna from you for a really long time because he doesn't want to see you hurt/drag you into this.

him having a nice friendship from Patricia that you envy. you swear you can't stand the word yacker lmao.

he finds it kinda cute when ur angry/jealous but he'll always reassure you you're the only one.

Patricia does not seem to like you, you can’t really tell if shes jealous since she mostly ignores you. 

kt is probably your best friend. Joy is loyal to Patricia and Mara is always on school work so. But Fabian always says if Nina were here you two would be friends. It's nice to nice to know someone would like you lmao i was like 10 when i wrote this.

As for the guys, Jerome and you would hang out a ton. He's just funny and helps you get out of your comfort zone with funny pranks. He is also strangely good at giving advice. 

btw this makes eddie incredibly jealous. Like he legit gives Jerome the death stare all the time. let's b real u lowkey like the angry ur mine makeout sessions. 

Fabian confesses about sibuna to you. He wants you to know and he trusts you.

You can't keep quiet and have a late night talk with Jerome about it. You both feel so excluded. 

This eventually leads to jeroy having a huge fight bc she knew

You apologized to joy and she forgave you but still felt like they needed a break.

Jerome cries to you for legit the whole week.

Eddie can't stand this. You sitting with him and helping and all.

Eventually anubis pretty much hates you. Fabian feels horrible.

It's time for the dreaded sibuna talk with eddie lmao.

"Y/n- look- I was just trying to protect you. What don't you understand?" He gets really flustered knowing what's coming next.

HE CONFESSES ABOUT BEING THE OSIRIAN AMD TELLS U EVERYTHING THATS GOING ON WITH FROBISHER

Kt says sorry and everything is pretty normal.

So another dreaded talk comes.

"Eddie, I want to help you- and."

"Y/N! what don't you understand? Creepy dead guy from 100 years ago? Alive! The sinners-"

Things get really quiet and folds his finders together by his face and "I can't."

"I can't- I wouldn't be able to live with myself if you got- or."

He looks at u with those eyes "if anything happened to you."

He gets up and cups your hands in his "I can't risk you- okay please don't make me."

u give in and say you'll stay out 

"Thank you!! Just stay here okay,I love you-"

u two look at each-other and he awkwardly

"So see ya later, osirian" you mock

"Very funny" he snarks kisses ur forehead and goes to meet with sibuna

“Y/N COME HERE PLEASE.”

“WHAT DO YOU NEED JEROME.”  you walk into his room

"Did I just hear an I love you?" He gives that cheeky smirk

"He just blurted it out- I think it was an accident."

"Please that was no accident." He looks down and starts laughing

"I mean? I love you just like that? He's pathetic." He's lowkey depressed bc he's too shy to say it it to joy

Ugh "is that all Jerome"

"Yes yes u can go now" he shoos u with his hand

Jerome spreads to alfie and joy which goes to Patricia fabian then mara

Eddies embarrassed af first and legit in denial he said it "psh i would never we r in high school."  but then in front of everyone during dinner while they're making side comments and giggling "So what?" He's annoyed "it's true." He leans back gets flustered then walks to his room .

you try to talk to eddie but he makes an excuse to be alone. you pry but he's being a bitch

HES PARANOID DENBY OR SOMEONE WILL GRAB U "text me when you get to the house." "Let me walk you into class" 

"who were u talking to?"

 "Babe I'm just worried." 

He waits outside your class. "Il walk you back to the house." 

Doesn't go to sleep if he can kiss you goodnight. He legit always gets in trouble.

u guys have weird games like whoever wins a staring contest gets a sandwich from the loser type shit it's fun and cute.

you two trash talk people literally all the time in ur room, in public. Bonding sesh.

bonus stuff i found in my notes 

Late night talks and cuddles r always in his room which could potentially lead to something more but y'all bitches scared of victor lets be real

when u two decide ur ready he rents a hotel for one day on the weekend and it's cute omg.

"I meant what I said. "

"You know eddie, not sure if u know this but when you say something to other people it has to make sense." you chuckle

"Don't ruin the moment lemon."

"Lemon? Tf?

"You’re always so sour."

"Always as u were saying" you groan.

"Nope you ruined it." He looks away

“EDDIE I SWEAR.”

He laughs hysterically "you’re face, relax I'm gonna tell you"

"When I said I loved you."

"Really?"

"Yeah I mean well it wasn't a lie so"

You kiss him. "Then I love you too."

He smiles and u two cuddle and talk and make fun of how mushy and disgusting it is.

On graduation he starts, "okay lemon- I wanna"

"Literally never call me that"

"Would you stop ruining the moment"

"On this day- in two years il propose to you."

"Yeah right." you mock.

when your in college with him living in an apartment all while he's cooking dinner he just gets down on his knees and u nut.

He teases u all the time and but you get use to it

He gets really serious when it comes to you.

Yes. you two are not perfect. He fibs a lil and jealousy comes into the mix but you guys love each other and its meant to be.

not my gif.

[dorianfiftyshadesof-gray]

Commentary: Game of Thrones 7x03

-7x03 guys! let's see if I get a broken heart again, shall we? -"Previously on Game of Thrones" *inhales* -Fuck you Thrones! gotta remind me of this little bean dying! -I'm Euron Babejoy's biggest stan. Love that extra cuck -The gentle hum of HBO followed the mighty intenseness of the GoT theme. Love it -Remember when the Bolton sigil was on Winterfell. sad reacts only -hOLY FUCK WE'RE STARTING WITH JON AND TYRION AND DAENY I CANNOT BREATHE! -Missandei is like an air hostess on QANTAS rn -if Davos dies this season, we riot! -Tyrion asking of Sansa. This is what I wanted! -Cheeky bants between everyone's favourite character™ and Jonny Snow -Naw mate, you're a Targaryen -I love Melisandre. She's had such a subtle arc -Varys is acting like such a salty bitch oml -hERE WE GO!! -they're looking at each other this is too much! -soooo many titles... -Daeny fake smiling highkey -He's your granddaddy too Jonny Snow, well great-grandaddy..i think -Daeny is so strong and powerful bless -”believe in yourself”: Daenerys “Rastafarian” Targaryen 2017 -Daeny trying so hard to get Jon to bend the knee with her speeches. Like the Night King is coming for that ass and he doesn't give a flying dragon about who you are and what you think you deserve. -i need Davos as my friend. I need this level of support -i knew they wouldn't get along. -oh shit. Jonny Snow is gonna get locked up -What did Varys say, count me curious -Hey there Celine Theon! lookin like Rose from Titanic -EURON!!! MY PIRATE DADDY YEEEESSSSSS! -"This is making me hard" oh Euron you horny piece of trash you -then again, Yara is my Salt Queen and no one treats my Salt Queen that way -lol "what a twat" true -What's up with all these peasants wasting food like no tomorrow?? -I bet Cersei still isn't going to marry him -Euron just keeps on throwing shade at Jaime every chance he gets -Haha knew it. You get no wifey, Euron -"Advice?" *gives confused look* "Does she like it gentle or rough?" *JAIME TRIGGERED* "The finger in the bum" *JAIME EXPERIENCES A TRIGGERING HE'S NEVER EXPERIENCED BEFORE* -Jaime blinks so intensely the 7 kingdoms almost became 8 -I actually feel empathy for Cersei right now. She really did love Myrcella. Her love for her children is really her only redeeming quality. and I also love how Game of Thrones emphasises how important a mother’s love for her children is, especially a mother’s love for her daughter. -oh shit what's Cersei gonna do -oh shit Cersei did that! -having to sit and watch your daughter die in front of you is pretty harsh, but i think pretty deserved -we gonna see some gold star incest now? -when you say no but she wants the succ -i'd definitely give Jaime the succ. He's sweet sugar daddy -this is like the first time we've seen Cersei and Jaime this intimate. like just looking into each other's eyes. still don't ship it but it's something to think about. -Oh hey there Mycroft acting exactly like Mycroft -Lena Headey is incredible at this whole acting shinding aye -if I had a shot of vodka every time Jon Snow was looking into the distance brooding, i'd be dead from fucked up livers -Jon confirmed top tier brooder by Tyrion -Philosophical chats w/ Tyrion Lannister -Tyrion puts everything into perspective -"Are you trying to present your own statements as ancient wisdom?" me in exams -Lol named after her brother and his uncle -They're both so similar. Little stubborn babies -Let's see how SanSan is doing -Fuck off Baelish -Sansa is being such a wise Queen. I am very pleased with her progress -Once again, Fuck off Baelish -Sansa of the Sass™ -That's some okay advice, I'll give him that -ARE WE GONNA HAVE ANOTHER STARK REUNION!!!!??? -OH MY HEART -i'm crying. i'm gone! -Why is Bran looking calm af while mascara is dripping down my face -"I can't be the lord of Winterfell, I'm the three eyed raven." Bran sounds like he just got back from burning man. -Sansa is me about Bran's storyline like "!?!?!?!?!?" -Is he talking about her goddamn wedding to Ramsay (who i miss dearly partly cause i've recently rewatched Misfits and Iwan Rheon is such a gift) -Sansa getting a Vietnam flashback -Jorah the Explorer has healed pretty quick. He used to look like when you pull the cheese of your pizza and now looks all sexy and scarred. -Jorah the Explorer is an awful liar tbh -well Samwell is fucked -it seems as if everyone's paths have crossed again this season -Hell yeah Samwell! -Slughorn acting like a mum who's son did the wrong thing but was proud all the same -But the mum still doesn't reward the son -Daeny wants to get her dragons out *wink wink nudge nudge* -Please don't let Grey Worm die -Oh my god Tyrion you sewer legend! -*feels relief* Grey Worm didnt die -oml Grey Worm did the sexy taking off the helmet thing -Fucking Greyjoys! always here to crash someone's party -Jaime sure does look good on a horse. He's like the dude from the Old Spice ad! -Oh nice! Highgarden looks super beautiful! and it's probably going to be the last time we see it -"He really was a cunt, wasn't he" Olenna bless -has Jaime got some type of Stolkhome Sydrome? Jaime please listen to reason! -Olenna being all Oprah on Jaime's ass -NO! Olenna can't die! Please no! -Olenna just dropped the mic on Jaime like wtf! -So one of my faves is dead now. Thanks a lot dicks. Until next week

[jooniereflection]

(Spoilers) Shipping wars & is Touka abusive towards Kaneki?

*Tokyo Ghoul spoilers ahead*

I’ve talked about this in another plataforms (such as Reddit), but I feel the need to make a whole post about this subject in here. Since I’m giving my opinion (that is, by the way, supported by facts), I need to say that since I’ve got in touch with Tokyo Ghoul, both the manga and the anime, that I could see Kaneki and Touka getting together at some point of the story, and yeah I ship it, but I don’t think that it matters tbh. A lot of people liked what has been happening in recent chapters of TG:re (Touken having sex *cough*), and a lot of people hated it. For me it doesn’t matter if you ship it or not, but see that’s exactly the point in here: people read a manga, watch an anime or watch a TV show and everything they care about in the series is based on shipping and that gets kinda stupid, especially when “fans” start to hate on the artist (in this case, mangaka Ishida Sui), destroy merch, etc, just because their ship didn’t sail, or because the ship they hate is now canon. Don’t get me wrong, people can enjoy stuff in their own way, but at least don’t harm the author like this? And why are people making everything about shipping wars? And why are people mad because Kaneki turned out to be straight, when the whole story started with him going on a date with Rize, who happens to be a girl? And why are people saying Touka is abusive (and messing with her Tokyo Ghoul Wikia page, for example) just because they don’t like Touken to be canon? I’m not gonna lie: I loved chapter, why? Because regardless of me shipping Touken (because what I ship doesn’t fucking matter now), this is probably the first time Kaneki is happy since the WHOLE series; and as everyone knows his life was never good at all (especially because of his mother abuse). About Hidekane: Hide was (is, I want him to be alive as well), Kaneki’s best friend and probably the only person he has ever received love from in his whole life. He was with him since childhood and a very special person for him. But, once again, it is pretty obvious since the beginning of the series that Kaneki isn’t gay, and Hide also supported him going on a date with a girl (he even thought it was Touka at first lol), and I’m 100% sure Hide would be 100% for Kaneki right now. Although I don’t care if someone ships this or not, I think we also should try to understand that there is a difference between friendship and romantic relationships. There are m/f friendships too. Not every human interaction means a romantic relationship, keep that in mind.

About Touka and Kaneki’s relationship: I’ve seen people making biased statements saying Touka is abusive towards Kaneki, because she hit on him a few times. I highly believe it isn’t abusive and this is my point based on what I’ve read in the manga: First time we saw Touka hitting on Kaneki and being truly violent towards him was in the beginning, when they first met after Kaneki was turned into an One-Eyed Ghoul. He called her a monster, saying he wouldn’t eat human meat because he wasn’t one, she got mad because she wasn’t used with One-Eyed ghouls (can’t explain this any better sorry D:). Well, we can see where it went right? (Surely Touka wasn’t the only one who got violent with him when they first met, we got Nishiki, Tsukiyama, etc). Then she rejected him for a while when he joined Anteiku, but it isn’t like Kaneki liked her too the firsts times they were together, he even said she was kinda scary. Then they started to get into a better relationship, mainly when he helped her when Hinami’s mother was killed. The story goes on, and I think the next time we saw Touka hitting on Kaneki was when he went to Anteiku first time after he left (edit). She went after him and ended up being bitchy, calling him trash and hitting on him. I believe she was truly mean that time, but there is something that needs to be pointed out: in TG Touka was pretty mad, with an angry personality (just like Ayato did and something she changed in TG:re), she was indeed a bitch that time. But I also remember that she regreted acting bitchy with him, because she thought that after being a total bitch he wouldn’t be coming back to Anteiku at all. Personally, I see this as a growing character: fucking things up and regretting it in a second. She has flaws and made mistakes just like anyone else. Deep down she just wanted him to be back. She was hurt because he left her behind, and mirroring her personality, she raged over him. TG ends with Touka hoping Kaneki will come back, and as a consequence for that she builds :re, a home that he can come back anytime. She didn’t force him to get his memories back as Haise, even though he went to the café and she knew Haise was Kaneki. But she simply didn’t want to force it on him, she didn’t want to do it for her own happiness, and that’s why I think that statements saying she forced herself on him are also biased af. And then she hit on him again after the Cochlea raid… And I have to say that it isn’t abuse either. I’d call it tsundere behavior tbh… I’m not even get deep into this, I’ll just say that it happens in many manga / anime. I just wanna state that Touka was always there for him. Even though he left her behind (because he wanted to protect her), she built a home for him waiting for him to come back, trained him in the beginning even though they didn’t get along very well (something he mentioned somewhere in TG:re), showed deep concern when he was kidnapped by Aogiri and risked her life to rescue him. His mother abused him. His mother was agressive and left him alone. Touka hit on him a few times of course, but it is lame to just see it as abuse (and say it is the same as his mother's​ behavior) when there is so much more to be seen. I think people need to understand her behavior better. The sex scene was, well, beautiful. I’ve seen people explaining it better than me tbh so I’m gonna skip this because it wasn’t the point of this post anyway. I just wanna say that for me it was more than sex and more than romance. It was development for both of them. I think their relationship is very complex and not perfect at all. It is about two people who have walked a long road, two people who acted bad towards each other, two people who were apart for quite long time. But not an abusive relationship.

[brothalynchhung]

2018 overview

goddddd im so late lol i didnt forget about this blog I'm just active on my other account also I'm never uhhhh home and I'm so busy now god i feel like I'm losing myself and my youth hood from not updating here fml life got me fucked up

ANYWAYS 2018 was fucking crazy what the hell how did so much shit happen in one year

in the 2017 overview i talked about regretting and trying to make up time and ohhhh bitch.... looool

anyways lets start:

2018 immediately started with some bullshit

literally started 2018 turning up LMFAOOO

so it was a good start 

spent new years w old friends some shit ill never do again

hotel room bullshit, eating out, running around outside, late drives listening to early 2000s music

OMG the hotel jesus i remember now i started 2018 on that trash ass app

talking to weirdos

being liked by over 2000 people?

wow what fucking redemption from middle school and high school 

but like... i learned all men are fucking losers LMFAOO

had two weird ass “dates” aka not really since i dipped those things quick aFFF lmao

fuck my old dumb friends for encouraging me to do that shit lol

was funny tho so who cares

this time (january) last year i was

broke

depressed about gl, no job, hating school

i was sooo depressed like 2018 until june i was literally just depressed and borderline suicidal cuz not having a job and being broke as shit was stressing me out so much

i tried so hard to get a job anywhere but for some reason it wasn't working???

i met(?????) that bitch HB LMAFOOOOO

godddd that fucking 5 hours 3 am call

all that weird obsessing and calls we used to have LMFAO he was such a fucking hoe why did i even waste my time

AND I STILL HAVENT MET HIM IRL YET LMFAOFPJEWIOGHERUGHESU EXCEPT FOR THAT ONE TIME I SAW HIM AT CU AND EUIRHGEUISHRH INSANE

but yeah fuck him for calling me too thick but THANK YOU GOD THANK YOU SO MUCH

highly he was one the best things to happen to me in 2018?

he called me thick i got cheesed and 

I LOST 15+ POUNDS IN 2018 

honestly after years of saying ill lost weight ill lose weight I FINALLY FUCKING DID

god 2018 was honestly year of the grind

gym every single day

rip school gym LMFAOOO i lost all my weight there god bless

oh yeah i became vegetarian!! and now I'm vegan LMFAO plot twist?

JESUS REMEMBER WHEN HB SAID MY VOICE TURNED HIM ON I CRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYGERYISEGHUIEHEIOS LMFAOOOO FUCK HIM THANKS FOR INSPIRING ME TO LOSE WEIGHT AND BE SEXY SO I CAN STUNT ON ALL U UGLY ASS MEN

anyways he weirdly kept on trying to hit me up even after he called me too thick infront of the boys (to which they still defended me shout out boys) fucking loser... i shut him down lol

ntcntcjkjkntcjkntcjkjk lol

brockhaamptoonn

threw up from that night i got too drunk LMFAO what an experience never again

i turned up too much in 2018 -_____- i don't even like it wtf

was a lot of fun tho like thats what i wanted right? reclaim my time i lost in hs/early uni because those hoes we don't speak of

i really didnt do shit other than obsess over being broke depressed and missing gl in the beginning of 2018 sooo.. lets just... fast forward? god what a weird ass year

and going to the gym everyday

counting calories

i need to start doing that shit again cuz I'm actually terrified i might be 120 again after fucking dubai

my old ass friends who i basically used to make up for my regret and reclaim my youth from high school was basically all of the beginning of 2018 . yes thanks for the memories thanks for helping relive my past that i lost . thanks. ur appreciated it was fun

but fuck y'all cuz y'all never had anything in common with me and y'all r embarrassing and boring . i was the exciting and better one 

also fuck y'all for letting me down . after y'all fucked off i got successful 

when i obsessed over that ugly weird guy in my phi classes and then i saw him up close and he was UGHLYLYYK GHU AND WEIRD AF 

and he was on my tip crazy with his weird low key fetishing internally racist bullshit LMFAOOO

i think the fuck not

he's still in one of my classes now i gotta spend the whole semester avoiding him IFNWFUWifhqfuwighau

god

discovered my love for white rabbit

finally finished that lonely ass semester

went straight into summer school w/zainb

love her ass lol

wait was 2018 the year i ran into that weird at the mall who tried to kiss me withing 10 minutes of meeting me at bubble tea? LMFAOOO WHAT A FREAK GOD 

my fucking life fam istg

watching hxh ugh best time ever

got a job!!! 

GOT ANOTHER JOB!!!

TWO AT ONCE and one of them was so crazy good for my career 

to the point where I'm STILL in contact with them

seriously getting a job changed the year for me so much

got out of my bad depression starting making money

straight grind

work gym 

BOUGHT EVERYTHING I WANTED.

LITERALLY EVERYTHING

ALESIS . STUDIO SET UP . LOEWE BAG. AND MORE EVERYTHING I WANTED AND I LOST WEIGHT

like i accomplished everything????

its like the beginning of the 2018 year was me gearing up and mentally readying myself for when i fiINALLY GOT A JOB and then i accomplished everything i wanted

yo i was working 3 jobs and that catfish hip hop class 

LFMAOOOOO THAT HIP HOP COURSE OMGG LMFAOEJGUIE ICONIC

i killed that shit lmao😂

met that weird ugly kid that was talking all this bullshit about us being the same and him thinking he had a chance w me LMFAOOO okay sure there

all cuz of fucking r and her high school esque bullshit

honestly fuck her LMFAOO i don't wish her anything just fuck off after all the bullshit since middle school you put me thru 

her and her ugly ass bf i had to deal with god I'm so happy she's out of my life

used you to make up from lost time 😂 i don't need u anymore Im at peace with myself BYE 

i don't even feel sentimental when i was run or i need u like i finished the book and i closed that shit and i feel better like i got so much closure this year

sister got married suwhoooo 

weird encounter w dal? tf? girl bye you've been dead to me since 2012 LMFAOO

so much people i really don't give a fuck about

honestly in 2018 i just lost all my fucks and only focused on me 

it gonna stay like that

made so much new friends i cant even name them all 

love all my work friends club GANG

chilling w hec and crew gang gang

oh yeah that taurus bitch i got confused feelings over and wasted my time 

cut his annoying ugly weird ass off lol but whatever lost time reclaimed it was very 2011-13 esque

got rid of everything from my sunken period thank god

got rid of so much shit

the closure/transformation was real

anyways uhhh so yeah so then fall semester started just continued working and gaming 

 lowest i got was 113 but idk wat i am now :( I'm so scared i really don't want to be over 115 but I'm like always bloated so I can never check I'm so sad rn

cut off annoying friends fuck them i have new better ones and i love myself

jjkjkjkjknctncjtkcktn lol 

good music good book watched so much movies

I SAW BROCKHAMPTON JCOLE THE GORRILAZ THE INTERNET DELASOUL AND BLOOD ORANGE LIVE!!! BITCH WAT THE FUCK ALL IN ONE YEAR

toronto trip!! mil trip!!! all on my own fucking amazing

end of 2018 was so good omg 

ran into 2% jfc

drunk called 2% lMFAOOO god just said sorry for nothing lmao i just want gl I'm clinging on to anything

OH YEAH that ugly broke bitch who wasted my time and objectified me yeah fuck him 

if he didnt do that disrespectful ass shit i wouldn't have called 2% ugh god

never using that trash app ever again 

ended 2018 in dubai 

YSL LOEWE ALL ON ME???? YES BITCH 

didnt feel like a failure in dubai stunt on everyone

ended this year amazing

really looking forward to 2019

looking forward to losing weight -____________- still

looking forward to money

accomplishing goals

getting closer to gl

FINISHING FUCKING SCHOOL FINALLY 

just happiness.. 

I'm happy. 2019 I'm ready lets fucking go. gl lets go . I'm on my way

went from broke hopeless no job depressed to thriving beautiful UP TO 4 JOBS everyone can fuck off

[swearronchanel]

6.03 aka I’m still crying 2 hrs later

I have no intro, I did this in one watch but had to obviously edit my typing but well yea this episode crushed me. I’m still shook tbh ahh. Read away if you wish

oh shit I’m not ready

SISTER MJ💔💔😭

FREE SISTER MC

ugh omg I can’t, my hearts about to explode about my chest

The Somali mum is so pretty, Nadifa right?

Oh shit she tryna hide the mail

she’s staying we know that

Ahh the cute turner scene ☺️

SHELAGH MY BBY 😭😍 she looks so good & her little behive omg

“Angela and I don’t have a tendency towards hoarding” SAS MASTER FLEX OVER HERE LOVE IT

“I’m no Marie Antoinette, I will not eat cake..” BRB ALREADY CRYING UGH 😰😰

Look at Valarie actually working & being a nurse

oh shit she’s 9months whoops, she ain’t going no where

JFK on the radio!!

Trixie’s tense, I feel

“If we’re all heading for oblivion, we need to be prepared” Fred lol he’s prepared for it all

No more shock treatment yes 😭💔

damn it my chest hurts and I’m emotional

Shelagh’s bump in her uniform 😭💕

PHYLLIS’s FACE WHEN SHE PICKS UP THE DOLL LMAO I LOVE HER

“Very useful fashion features” so precious, are magazines her maternity wardrobe inspo? 😭

LMAO PHYLLIS “I’ve never needed an editorial to instruct me on how to put myself together and I’ve never had any complaints” SHE’s A GEM

LOL @ SHELAGH’s REACTION

Valarie shook

the reality of fgm ..

Sister MC 😰

DOCKERILL AND SISTER MJ OMG I LOVE IT

“How can I be confident your purpose is sincere?” RIGHT SISTER

“I’m very glad to hear it ” PHYLLIS AH, she’s here for it!! I might be too, i have to wait for next week

omg sister MC, she loves her habit 😰💕 why tf did they take it though??!

FREE SISTER MC 😭 YOU DO NOT FALL SHORT LOVE

“How brave for her” and you!😭

PHYLLIS AND TRIXIE >>

“I’m not sure I have the gumption” BBY 💕 you deserve the world!!!

“Failure isn’t fatal, but hesitation can be” Phyllis is so wise & a gift we don’t deserve

Fuck im crying again

WHO STOLE HER BIBLE !!?

ugh fuck Mr Kenley, we don’t like his bedside manner

Patrick doing research so quickly, I’m proud & Phyllis is woke, enlighten us all

VISIT SISTER MC & free her !!!

lol this little girl, stop touching shit

She’s cute though I guess

Ok Val saying the right thing

MY BBY SHELAGH looking adorable💕

TIM HAS A FRIEND! Lmao it seems like he has none because he’s always with his family. Maybe he’ll get a girlfriend next series haha

“It is you, lost to us no longer but here before us perfect and complete ” MY HEART IS FUCKING BROKEN OMG I AM A MESS

PROTECT ALL THE SISTERS 😭💕💕

YES SECURE HER DISCHARGE, ASAP

I’m crying??!!

PHYLLIS RUNNING THE CUBS

LMAO PHYLLIS YELLING AT FRED LOVE IT, SHE IS SO BADASS, A GEM

“My way of making amends” poor sister J it’s not your fault 💔

LMAO SISTER WINNIE FAKE DRIVING ALL WRONG IM DEAD

HER SCREAM HAHA

ugh looking at kenley makes me sick, go away

Sister MJ & SISTER J MAKING HER BED💕 AND THE BIBLE AND CANDY ON THE PILLOW OMGGG

Oh shit where’d nadifa go

SISTER MC IS COMING HOME 😭😭

oh shit that lady had her bible, let her keep it

aw she did

Oh no nadifa’s going into labor??  ah omg

SISTER MC IS HOME😰💖

“Simply by being here” I’m crying again

LOOK AT HER PRECIOUS SELF WHY WOULD THEY HURT HER

Cuban Missile crisis on the tv

Trixie giving sister MC special soap💔

“I’d rather you give her my love” omg 😭😭

Fred painting the windows 😂

“President Kennedy.. he could charm the birds out of the trees” hell yea he was charming, rip. I wonder if next series they’ll mention his assassination? & side note Natalie Portman better win that Oscar for Jackie tonight

Nadifa’s sister is named Deka, got it. She reminds me of one of my cousins

Val and Babs new bffs?

Oh shit she’s in labor for real

“No knife” omg

I’d be freaking TF OUT

AH SHIT SHE’s GONNA DELIVER THIS BABY

AHHH OMG IM SCREAMING

THE BABY IS OKAY, SHE’S OKAY OMG MY HEAD, MY CHEST, EVERYTHING HURTS

damn that was intense

Gold fucking star for Valarie though

“I longed for this baby Patrick, longed for it, prayed for it and now I’m wondering why my prayers were answered because I don’t know what sort of a world we’re bringing it into ” SHELAGH DONT CRY, Ima cry 😰💕

“We just have to hope and we’re good at that” UGH MORE TEARS, YES YOU GUYS ARE 😭💕💔

Delia making another 2 second appearance

“If God loves me and wants me to do this, why is he making it so hard” omg I’ve been tearing this whole episode

DAMN YOU CTM for hurting my hEART and making it better at the same time!

Who are all these extra nuns

Aw Nadifa, but her baby is precious  

Sister MJ & MC killing me 💔

“It is no bad thing to be lost in a fog or at sea..” 😭😭😰😰

“Nurse bubsy” um bitch we don’t need that attitude right now

“We’re all going to hell in a handcart” indeed

lol Trixie wasn’t having it though she gave babs the only side eye 😂😭

Shit sister MC reading the paper no

I can’t imagine living through this crisis?! But like my grandparents did

The world was shook. But we’re shook now?? the world is constantly falling apart 

Wait I love THIS SONG

DON’T FORGET WHO’S TAKING YOU HOME….SAVE THE LAST DANCE FOR MEEEEE💃🏼💃🏼💃🏼

tom x babs, Delia with the photo of Pats!, fred x violet aw cute montage 💕 💔

Trixie looking spectacular ugh goals

“You’d think the world would’ve learned by now..” YEA TRIXIE WE’RE STILL SAYING THAT IN 2017

“London is your oyster” lol that phrase is funny af idk why 😂

Cute Trixie and Christopher moment though 😭

Patrick and Sister MC! “I was once as lonely..” I’m a w r e c k 😭💔

Trixie in those black pyjamas I still want

SISTER MC AND TRIXIE 😭💔💕

“I generally find that if you can summon the courage to sit through the bleakest day, then in the end the weather will change” 😭I needed that Trixie

“Nothing worse than being wrongly dressed for an occasion” omg she’s gonna ditch the habit

Val you said before there was no normal

THE FLAT IS EMPTY JUST LIKE MY FUckING HEART & SOUL THANKS TO THIS DAMN PROGRAM(ME)

ANGELA’S BABY STUFF

“Maybe I never gave up hope”

They actually fucking kissed again rip to me

“Lots of memories” yes “they don’t belong to the house, they’re ours. They come with us” YEA AND WITH ME TOO AH

IM AN EMOTIONAL PIECE OF GARBAGE, excuse me while jump out the window and throw myself away with the rest of the trash😭😭😭💕💕

BET THEY BORROWED PHYLLIS’S ROOF RACK AGAIN

“A lady never tells” ok Trixie 😉😏👀

CRISIS AVERTED !!!

“We live to see another day” mood every day in america tbh

Phyllis running to the radio😂

“I feel like an absolute fool” “then we’re a fine pair” Pair of fools ugh I’m cryin I love u fools

NORTHFIELD

oh shit, is Sister Mary Cynthia really going to leave the order or just start over? 😭

I know you didn’t get the memo yet son but no liquor for trix😲

My Trixie 😭 look how far she’s come 😭💕and she’s going to tell him soon and I’ll be crying and gushing with pride

Chin chin

THEYRE CAMPING OUT AH, THEN CAMPING TRIP REFERENCE 

“We’re very lucky though, aren’t we” ugh MY HEART

SISTER MJ AND MC OMG 💔😭

my heart hurts. That’s all. Fuck I’m crying like real tears

Noo  Deka is going to be cut😰😰

yo Val calm tf down, it’s fucked up but you can’t be yelling like that

Nadifa standing up for herself 😭

I can’t deal 💔

“What would you like to be called while your with us?” “If you don’t mind, and if I’m allowed to choose, I’d just like to be called by my name.. which is Cynthia” 😭give Bryony an award😭

“There are so many secret wounds, so many types of hidden scar.” VANESSA YOU CANT LEAVE ME CRYING ON THAT NOTE

Nadifa didn’t circumcise her daughter !!!

“The soul, being stronger than we think, can surges all mutilations and the marks upon it make it perfect and complete” VANESSA IM C R Y I N AND IM D E A D

I hope You all prepare for my funeral, pls arrive well dressed, dios te bendiga 

Rest In Peace Gabby Rachel Nuñez, 1998-2017. Cause of death: too many feelings from call the midwife 💔💔

BONUS NEXT WEEK’S PREVIEW:

Susan Mullucks !! She’s so big

Boutta get prosthetic legs, my abuelo has one

“This isn’t funny Valarie” WHAT DUMB SHIT DID VAL SAY TO MY BBY SO I CAN SMACK HER

Trixie slaying though

I thought Mr Mullocks came around last series wtf?!

“Nurse Crane should stand down from duties until the situation is resolved” OMGGG NO

OMG NO SHE HIT THE ANTOINE KID WITH HER CAR NOOO

“If you caused harm to someone else would it not mask you question everything you life has come to stand for?” FUCK NEXT WEEK WILL BE JUST AS BAD FOR ME

PHYLLIS IS SOBBING, I AM SOBBING OMG IM NOT READY