#like i mainly want to be in uni bc its not work. its not this stupid job and these stupid emails

[calamitys-child]

Wait, I saw ur bookshelf read flags tags can u recommend some books on horror and gender? I'd love to read more about horror but I don't know where to start

ABSOLUTELY I CAN!

Men, Women, and Chainsaws by Carol J. Clover - I just finished rereading this one and it's so good man, it's the foundation of ideas of the Final Girl in slasher films and talks a lot about identification with characters blurring gender lines especially in horror. Some of the concepts and language used are kinda dated, it was first published in 1982 as an article (Her Body, Himself) then expanded into a book, but it broadly really holds up and its a super strong foundational gender horror text

Gender, Genre, and Excess by Laura Mulvey - this one's a short read and it's fantastic in the way it categorises films as 'body genres'; the idea of specific film genres, including horror, being specifically constructed to evoke a bodily response, and the way these genres thus act as foils to each other

When The Final Girl Is Not A Girl by Jeremy Maron - builds on Clover's work and takes the "girl" component out, focusing on female killers and male survivors in slashers

Is The Rectum A Grave? by Leo Bersani - less focused on film texts and kind of a hard read but it makes some really good points about the potential for queer people to take the horror that cishet people have of us and use that as empowerment, the idea of reframing "penetrated/penetrating" as "swallowing/swallowed"

Queer Theory's Evil Twin by Susan Stryker - on that note, Stryker is a fantastic writer who does this piece on how monsters in horror films are potentially wish fulfillment for trans people and how queer studies generally seems afraid of trans studies specifically

Skin Shows by J. Halberstam (they publish under 2 different names but it's always a J initial) - SO GOOD. SO good. I got a copy for my birthday bc I miss my uni access to it so much. Loads of in depth discussion about trans visuals and constructed bodies in horror media

Monsters in the Closet by Harry M. Benshoff - I feel like the title is enough of a pitch for this one tbh. Focuses mainly on cis non-heterosexual depiction in horror

Like and Lycanthropy by Tim Stafford - if an academic article could be my best friend its this one. THE transgender werewolf text of all time, discourse on empowerment/disempowerment vs assimilation/non- or anti-assimilation. I kiss it on the papery lips every day

This is all just off the top of my head, and just academic/nonfiction; if you want fiction I can recommend a few of those, and if you want more stuff I have an essay I wrote linked in my pinned which has a way more comprehensive resource list at the bottom :D I love love love queer horror I am always delighted to talk about it

[littlegreenplumbob]

People you'd like to get to know better - tag!

i got tagged in a tag by @calicosimgirl 😁😁 which is insane to me bc i consider myself just a little tumblr stalker who occasionally posts piccys of my sims. tysm💚 this is my first tag as im extremely new to actually frequently using tumblr so idk how to do these things so i really hope im right with how i do this

Last song you listened to:

safety pin by 5sos. i am obsessed with those guys<33 ive seen them live in concert once and i cant wait to do it again:)

also! blissful ignorance by foxhaunt. im seeing them at a gig in manchester next month after seeing them around on tiktok and this song? it just perfectly scratches my brain in all the right ways

Favourite colour(s):

green!!!! my irl nickname is littlegreengirl, i have green hair and the majority of my clothes are green. i just think its funky. i also wear a lot of black so i guess that too

Currently watching:

superstore! cant believe i never watched it before. and also the new disney+ percy jackson. i also love bad education, b99 and futurama. i am a chronic watch-till-youre-sick-of-it so anything ive seen before that i can just whack on and know its funny.

Last movie you watched:

percy jackson sea of monsters. ive been rereading the books and reigniting my passion, what can i say (even though i have thallasophobia weirdly)

Sweet/spicy/savoury:

savoury. bc i dont think there is anything better than gherkins 🤩🤩

Last thing you googled:

i think it was ‘average amount of teeth’ bc i was on facetime with my best friend and we fell into a rabbit hole of how many teeth people have. if youre wondering, i have 24 (and that is the least amount of teeth out of everyone ive asked???)

Currently working on:

i havent played my nsb save in a while since im back home from uni atm. i go bsck on sunday so im sure i will be back into sim mode the second i step foot on mancunian ground. ive been really interested in posting lookbooks as well, as soon as i figure out how to take ok quality photos and sort out my cc. but if youre talking physically working, im at work on my break rn and i have been slaying at making those big macs.

i fear i have exposed a lot of myself to some people who do not need to know this much about me. but i guess thats the point!!!! i think tags are very fun and if anyone wants to tag me in future ones, hell yea! lets see what other weird things i can google inbetween now and then

im not sure who else to tag as i mainly only follow cc creators haha - pls dont feel any pressure to respond or anything but id like to make friends on here:)

@mooneonthings @simfestation @fayethegray

[onlyswan]

Hiii Art!! How have you been and how's your work/studies whatever it is that you do. Good? Eh? Well mine's kinda on a dry and wet mode rn lol.

Mind if I rant here?

I have 2wk worth of exams coming up and I have no motivation to study. I honestly regret taking up the course im studying for. I mainly took it up because its lucrative and helpful in today's economy. But honestly I should have just pursued 14yo Lyfie's dream to become a nurse. It wouldve been so much more rewarding🥲🥲🥲.

Anyways despite that im just praying my gpa doesnt go down the drain, and im gulity right now because i wasted the whole day doing nothimg even though i told myself to go study. I couldnt do it. I just......well i knew what i was doing was bad but everytime i looked at my notes i felt as if i knew them all, and in the end achieved nothing. Sigh i hate myself for how repetitve this unhealthy cycle has become. Parental pressure isnt helping either. I try ranting and they say its just momentary tiredness and it would go away soon and then further guilt me into wasting time :((((.

Wow that became long. Im so sorry for litterally trauma dumping on you, especially if tou had a long day. It would be the last thing you'd wanna worry about 😂😂😂

Anyways i wanted to ask you about your writing, both as a fellow fic author and as loyal reader of yours. What inspires you to write?

(I.e set time aside to write your fics and even feel motivated to open up that document? I have so many plot bunnies, headcanons and fic ideas, but no matter how enticing, everytime i try opening up my google docs, that burst of excited energy saps away. Urgh its so frustrating!!😠)

And for your fics, we had possible teases of engagement btwn jk and oc and even f2l hopelessly pining jk and oc. So i was wondering will we ever get a confession scene 👀👀👀?

I rmbr when jk ssid somewhr in an interview where he would love to lift his partner up and kiss them and my mind went str to the in which couple lol knowing your writing and since its jk its gonna be so cute cheesy and gonna involve tears 😇.

Funny enough i also know that both oc and jk are heavy on respecting e/o be it space or privacy, and when i heard Twice MISAMO's Do Not Touch song which was about consent and it was potryaed beautifully compared to art masterpeices, it got me thinking about their initial stages of skin ship or how they got comfortable around e/o physically or even their first time. Idk im just so invested in this universe lol 😭😂

Hmmm, but thats it for now. I'll reach out to you soon!!! :D

-Lyf

hiii lyf <3 work is draining and some customers are rude but my co-workers are fun to be with so it’s alright 🥲 uni also started this week and it’s nerve wracking but also soooo exciting !! i’m just gonna need some time to adjust to this new life + schedule 😬

i’m so sorry to hear that beloved :( i’m sure with the given the circumstances that you chose what you thought would be best for you at that time and i think it’s important that you recognize that too !! 🫂 and yesyes studying is so freaking difficult especially when you don’t feel motivated >:( for me personally time management has been pretty helpful. i love schedules ^^ sometimes i do house chores first to get my brain into work mode too and i give myself little rewards during break times (which are sooo important) or after studying hehe like snacks or screen time !! please look after yourself and your health. 🥺

dw i’m mostly fine with you guys ranting about stuff like school !! because same !! but i’m just putting it out there that when it’s abt triggering stuff i have to restrain myself 🥲 i don’t reply to those because it really affects me badly mentally too :(

hmmm when it comes to inspiration to write 🤔 like i said i do love schedules hehe i open a draft every night before bed + in my notes i also save words/phrases/scenarios that pop in my mind throughout the day but couldn’t write yet :D but i don’t really get to write everyday bcs i’m too tired or nothing just comes out. sometimes i only write one sentence or one paragraph then pass out lol. on a good day i finish one scene and maybe start writing the next too !! a jungkook weverse live will always 100% give me a big rush of motivation tho 🤭

and i doooo want to explore the earlier stages of oc and jungkook’s relationship 🥹🥹🥹 i have many many plans !! but i just want them to be perfect so it might take me a while </3 this is still a long journey if y’all are up for it hehe thank you so much for being invested in our little iw universe !! 🥰 it truly means the world to me that i get to enjoy my passion like this :") ilysm lyf 🫂

[straykats]

anyways hi guys i love u all here are some thoughts ive had

on ocean vuong and my own writing. i'm revisiting vuong's works for an assignment (bc i suddenly have the opportunity to centre an entire project around it the way that i want to hehe) and i think i'm realising how much he's influenced ymy writing fr? obviously not like. the stuff i post/ed here but the stuff i've done for my writing classes. i've acknowledged his work/s as inspiration, but mainly in the 'his use of the vietnamese language...' way but i think my writing style in general leans towards his as well.. and idk how i feel about that? i'm not saying i write exactly like him or as well as him (god no) but the tone? but i do want to believe that i've written in That Tone and Style before (im pretty sure i have, even before reading on earth) but im scared that im 'copying' his style. idk. i really do love the voice he uses when he writes, the way he poses questions and presents ideas. yes i would love for my writing to affect people the way his has affected mine. but i don't.. i want to still have my own thing, that isn't mine just because the reader hasn't read vuong's works? and ig its all about pov and interpretation at the end of the day - it all lays in the hands (eyes? mind?) of the reader/audience how something is interpretted, irrespective of creator intent - but i'm stil lconscious of it. idk. hm. smth to consider when i write later this week ig.

on my own writing (in general). i think i really do lack so much faith in myself. the feedback i've gotten back for my writing assignments have honestly all been beyond what i ever thought i could get (?????? fckin full marks last sem???? and this sem, a HD even though i gave it so little thight????) but i still don't think. i'm like. capable of pursuig writing in any capacity. i know one way to kind of 'venture out there' and find out how i fare 'in the real world' is to apply to comps and lit mags and stuff but i just. ahhhbhdsvhsvsvs when i think outside of the uni context i just don't think i have it in me but again, i realise i just need to kind of start applying to and entering stuff but ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

on crushes and relationships. sometimes i have like. Thoughts. like just passing 'oh i hope they think of me' or 'oh i hope they (only) do this to/with me' etcetc and i'm like. oh okay maybe this is what a crush is???? because in school it was more of a. like. the people i was conscious of were people i was being teased about, so i was conscious of them and had similar thoughts but not.. the way i do now? like. i was just worried that the other person would feel a certain way about something, or would only do something with me, would treat me differently etc and then people would notice and then the teasing and the rumours etc would get worse. but now im like. just thinking it myself. no anxieties other than 'oh is this weird' 'what if this is a crush? what if i actually have a crush on my friend/s????' (yes plural okay wait i'm getting to that soon) and idk like. the whole realm of 'romantic or platonic?' is not an unfamiliar one. but it being familiar does not mean i have an answer sigh. anyways. why plural friends??? (and additinoal question, which i wont explore here, but whats the general opinion on having multiple crushes? is that a thing? i know polyamory is a thing, but im not looking for or want a poly relo. is it even possible to have multiple romantic crushes at once? does that mean theyre NOT romantic? anyways. moving on.)

the one male friend who i am very conscious of having these thoughts about: we're not exactly childhood friends, but we were friends in childhood..? as in, we went to the same school. forced friendship kinda vibes. friends the way the majority of people in a primary schooler's class is their friend. but then i moved schools and ended up keeping in contact with him (amongst other primary school friends) and then we had serious/personal convos? and then we stopped talking for 5-8 years (memory sucks okay sorry) and then. now we work together and long story short we do share a friendgroup? but i'm not super close with him and idk if thats just how he is but ANYWAYS like do i just want us to be closer friends bc i ??? idk like i do wanna be closer friends w him uh guys this is actually EMBARRASSING

my best friend: okay look im more accepting of the fact that i do not (currently?) actually have a romantic crush on her but also like. what if i do and i just dont realise it and one day i realise it but its too late bc she'll be engaged fr (she has a boyfriend rn and i'm chill w it? sometimes i think smth about them and im like ??? wait huh is this jealousy or smth??? but then im like no its literally not) but yeah idk its 1am rn and my head isnt working so tldr; im pretty sure i dont have a romantic crush on her but i also do wish our friendship was more phsyically affectionate, the way some of my other female friendships are? and i think thats what confuses me? she's aware she's not a physical person (even w her bf) and we're aware that i am NVJKNVKS hm idk im making sense in my head but i dont think i am in writing

anyways them two^ do be the main ???? but im also like. what if im just wanting a different type of friendship yknow. like how much do i want. at what point is it no longer wanting a closer/different friendship, and is actually wanting a romantic friendship? how does one 'develop' romantic feelings??? im so confused man i wish there was a diagnostic criteria for these types of things. i cuold write a whole thing about rom/platonic relationships and confusion. maybe the confusion is a sign in itself (maybe im aro? but the idea of an (intentional and sconiously) romantic relationship is so neat and comforting and i??? but what if---- what if i just lobotomise myself fr feelings are so confusing

on the home situation [cw: fam neg, divorce, mental health?] mum got a house and she wants me to move in with her, if not both myself and my brother. dads kinda being a dick about this whole thing, but i also understand that with the way it happened, hes probably got a lot going on mentally. i don't like.. i don't like being able to understand and think about others the way i do. i become too conscious of the (possible) reasons why someone is acting the way they are. i get too empathetic and understanding and i don't know how to draw lines and do things with myself as a priority. i can't make choices that put my safety and wellbeing first, because i understand why everyone wants what they want and why they need what they want. i might even be extrapolating and overthinking things to the point that theyre not even half truths anymore. i'm so scared to make choices and hurt people because i've grown up with such strong fears that all sorts of bad things will happen if i do this or that, if i make someone feel a certain way. and theres a conscious part of my brain thats like. well. conscious that i need to Snap Out Of It and realise that i cant keep thinking and living like this and i need to prioritise myself at somepoint. idk i have a lot to say about this but i think it would need a sep post on its own. and better analysis of content post-writing to identify relevant warnings. hm. anyways. times do be tough.

on stationary, desk set ups, and productivity. this bits just for funsies but ive recently been kinda obsessed w the spiral notebooks that u can like. refill/replace paper etc and i think theyre so neat so i got a bunch of different paper packs and also folders or whatever BUT ive been too scared to use them? last week i tried to start like. daily planning and semi-journalling and i drew up september in calendar format or whatever and then a daily task thing w time schedules etcetc (trust okay the vision was visioning) and i knew i probably wouldnt be able to this daily but i could at least do it some days and try and get into a pattern but anyways yeah have not looked at it since KFJJKFNJSKNFSK. but i'm using the paper/folder thing now for project development (assignment) and i also want to have one dedicated to references etc (like an annotated bibliography kinda thing) bc a lot of the work i do centers around similar concepts so old material stays handy yknow but i always end up having to pull up old assignments and trying to remember what was in each reference. anyways. problem for later. i also got the logitech casa pop-up desk thing and i'm enjoying it v much. also got a desk lamp thing from amazon and its ocming tmrw and i'm hoping getting better lighting at my desk will make me more productive (i tend to be more productive working at the kitchen table, but its not ideal bc dads in the living room doing karaoke ....

[menalez]

I'm a Brit and watching from the sidelines in horror at the US prospect of picking between two genocide maintainers, anti migration, racist, rich men both with a past of violence to women (structurally and interpersonally) who operationally both function to maintain and expand American imperial interests.

Then I look at my own country and we have two parties. One- creates poverty from neoliberal and right economic policies. They massage a wealth divide. They notoriously glass cliff woman and racial minority politicians, supports genocide and actively wishes to continue falsifying its imperial legacy and shirks their geopolitical role in creating immigration issues and pursuing inflammatory rhetoric that centralises hegemonic interests.

My other choice is another party who is saying this is all bad, let's get the tories out! Then use fluffy language to try to differentiate the way they aim to maintain the structures and factors that allow for all the strife we face but with no critical analysis of how we ended up in the situation. They want the same socioeconomic systems, want to also kick you in the face but with a softer boot.

I also have to play tactical voting so I'd vote green party as they align most to my economic and environmental interests and best choice for refugees, but on social issues like gender, royals, military they're still not far enough left. But England's crappy overton window this is a minority position. If I was still in my uni consistency I'd be voting green (interesting how they call it when students are home 🙃) but last election was a shit show minority seat and we've had a wanker tory MP who I badly want to vote out. This guy is bottom of the barrel, his alternate labour candidate is very much hearts and minds liberal wash but he is the only other opponent who can unseat him.

But I fucking hate Sir Keir Starmer, affectionately named Keith Starmer, Kiddy Starver, who loves racist criminal systems, won't take a firm stand on safe refugee routes and people are drowning, loves capitalism and cap doffing. I also despise the labour party and the whole British political system and its culture wars.

We all love scoffing at America but here we have the same issues, they just have a different polish.

Sorry for the blog, love your content! You make me a better feminist

the UK does operate similarly in the sense that the two parties that are typically in power are either labour or tories. but honestly i don’t think it’s AS bad in the sense that at least tories & labour do have some visible differences. meanwhile the differences between democrats & republicans at this point seem to mainly be how they present themselves, bc in practice they’re pretty much aligned on most fronts.

personally i think the UK’s system is more hopeful bc in general i do feel like there is less corruption and more fairness in the system but also i havent seen labour in power for an extremely long time (when i googled it, it seems the last time there was a labour PM was early 2010…) and UKIP grew in power + the UK seriously shot themselves in the foot with brexit + tories have been effectively making the UK worse. so perhaps that’s just naïveté on my part. but at least from what i’ve seen, the same hopeless mindset americans have doesn’t seem to persist among the brits… then again maybe the brits are seeing their govt thru rose-coloured glasses as u have stated so,, maybe that’s why.

idk much about the stuff u mentioned on labour not being particularly good tho. i know they also put in policies that were bad for working class ppl, but idk much else beyond that. also i know they’re frequently accused of being antisemitic tho i’m unsure how true that is

[boolger]

i was tagged by the sweet @rosieblogstuff !!<3 anyone who wants to answer this too, consider this your tag 🫡💖

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

I have 53! Somehow, haha. Once I'm done w thesis, it will grow for sure!

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

608,326 words! 😳 i stresswrite

3. What fandoms do you write for?

right now its only Macgyver(2016) and Call of Duty! I've made a marvel crossover, but not anything else. Once I'm done with uni and actually have the time to write and see shows without feeling like I should be doing other stuff, I will definitely write for more! I want to write something for stuff like Knives out, Phantom of the Opera, Star wars -- but mainly a ton of Macgyver and call of duty, lol

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? well, they've changed quite recently, since i jumped headfirst into the COD fandom and was welcomed very nicely! So, right now, theyre:

Adventures of 141's bunny (1,502 kudos😳😳)- Call of Duty

Mami's omega (448 kudos) - Call of Duty

The Heron Club (363 kudos) - Call of Duty

Warm water (150 kudos) - Macgyver

A pregnant night (144 kudos) - Macgyver

Im very grateful for each single kudos !!💖🥰

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes, or I try now! It was easier when I was only in the macgyver fandom, since it is much smaller, but now in the Call of Duty fandom, i'm afraid I simply cannot keep up! So if I don’t reply to your comment, I’m sorry, I’m not trying to be rude or anything!👉👈

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

phew, that is one good question, because I honestly don't know. I have a tendency to end things either happy and hopeful like, or dark and like, with the vibe of things just being uncertain but not necersarily angsty? Lmk if im wrong lmao. I think the closest is in A dog needs a garden, but then again, its not really angsty - at least not to the characters. just... dark.🤷‍♀️

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

hm. I mean, in my two fics Sir and his good boy and my baby’s got a gun (that I struggle to read myself now bc while I do have a soft spot for them, I hate my writing lol.) I make poor Mac go through a lot of shit, and they both end up on a happy or hopeful note- so those two, I guess? For now, heh.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

mmm, not really. When I do get some questionable comments, I either just answer in a jokingly manner or ignore it. I think I've only deleted one comment, lol. 💀

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

hah, YES. what don't I write. Despite being ace and not really being interested in sex irl, I sure do write a lot of smutty smut. I mostly write kinky stuff, a lot of BDSM ones. A lot of darker stuff too. I mean, out of 53 fics I think maybe 13 ish of them doesn’t have smut in them? So yeah, I write a bunch of smut.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Well, I've only written three (so far) lol. Two of them was just... Angus Macgyver and Jack Dalton having a threesome with a character from a different fandom, LMAO. I've written them having a threesome with Bucky Barnes from marvel and then one with Simon Ghost Riley from Call of Duty. The craziest one technically isn’t a crossover lmao, more just the fact that I made twilight vampires canon in a Macgyver fic I wrote once 💀😂 it’s called this is the skin of a killer, Jack and yes, I find it funny and stupid myself.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I hope not, lol. So no, at least not that I know of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Uh, no, again, not that I know of, lmao.👀

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Mmm, not technically, no. I don't talk often with a lot of fanfic writers, (im shy and idk how to become friends with people) but I do have 2 wonderful sweet friends I met through the macgyver fandom, whom i'm very grateful for and love lots. (They adopted my imposter ass who hadn’t even seen the show) They have managed to deal w my annoying ass for like... almost 2 years, I think and somehow isn't scared away yet. So, what I was going with that is, no, i've not co-written anything, but they do spar a lot with me and we discuss ideas and such, hehe. They've def helped me with a lot of fics.

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

That is one good question that I honestly don't know the answer of. I'm pretty open to most ships, as long as they're written well in the fic or the show. (and legal. and not *ncest or pseudo *ncest.)

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

don't call me out like this, I have a lot of WIPS. But honestly? Probably Wet footprints on the wooden floor (Macgyver). A part of me wants to, but its been like 1,5year or so, i think. At this point I would probably just delete it, then rewrite the entire thing and post it again, lol, because I do like the concept.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I don't know, actually. I like to think I write somewhat interesting plots whenever I'm trying not to just write pure smut. But eh, idk. I think I have an okay sense of humor too? but I am also biased.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Weird sentences! English isn't my first language, Danish is! and the structure of a sentence can be very different in Danish, so sometimes my English sentences ends up weird bc they're translated, lol. I'm working on it and I have definitely become better ver since writing my first fanfic, lol.🤷‍♀️

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I like to read it, but I struggle with writing it! It's hard, especially when you dont speak a certain language. I sometimes go with google translate, but I've tried just writing it like this when its in another language, lol. so ye, fun but hard.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Eh, i mean, I wrote a fanfic or two when I was like 15 or something, but I cannot, for the life of me, remember what for. probably marvel or twilight or something😂

If we go with the boolger account time-line, then it's Macgyver!

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

don't make me choose between my babies. So I shall cheat the system and mention some of my fav.

The many deaths of a phoenix(macgyver), since I like the plot ideas lol, even though I feel stuck with it atm.

Lovers in the garden of Eden (macgyver) (dead dove dont eat) which is def fucked up, not the worst kind I've written but still. It has a special place in my dark, f'ed up heart. 🖤

Do you think I'm broken? (macgyver) bc I tried to voice a lot of my own gender struggles through it lol.

and finally, i am a lil proud of So long as I'm your favorite toy(COD) heh.

[dokiyeom]

HELLO ?? i bias soul , haerin & kevin 2 ?? for tbz it's kevin jacob changmin chanhee & sunwoo sigh they are all so dreamy i love them 💔💔

I'll probs watch it then!! omg creative writing/english lit major?? that's so cool! those minors are super cool too i hope u get accepted in every one of the schools 🙏 & tbh it's great that u want to explore diff options because i agree that its kinda difficult to like know what way we want to go or what sector we like 😓

meeee mmmh ive applied to 10 schools/majors because that's the most we can do here and i mainly applied for LEA which is like applicated languages w/ english & a 2nd language and i chose Korean. so 4 schools for that major (5 if u count the school that offers a double major LEA korean + management 🤕) & then also a few schools for info communication & a few others for science of languages + media communications so BASICALLY ! something centered about languages but mainly english + korean ..

they are all over the country though so i hope i get accepted near where i live but i don't have much faith because the school near (LEA english korean one) had an admission rate of 2-8% 😹 BUT ITS OK that's how uni works alala

we r actually connected it’s literally confirmed by our biases omg,, && hi hello give me ur thoughts after watching the performance !!!! and thank u 🙏🙏 tbh i don’t have tons of expectations for college decisions bc i live in a p competitive area + this yr college admissions is soso insanely competitive ugh,, but mainly bc during soph & jr yr my mental health was absolutely abhorrent && my academic performance vv much reflected that LMAO so on paper i’m not a great candidate,, but i’m hopeful that some of my personal essays save my application fjdjdj

and omg wait that’s such a cool major ?? are u looking to do something in translating or communications ? like smt abroad :00 but omg that acceptance rate is so low,,, praying for u dori

[ririsingstar]

akira

Hi it’s been a loong week. All I did this week was to sleep eat work play a bit and repeat. It’s exhausting and kinda boring to sit all day long in front of my workstation facing two screen monitors with a keyboard below. I am really exhausted and I am missing the fresh air and the damp atmosphere with a bit of sunlit splashing and wooing quietly in front of my face. 

My back really aches and my butt hurts for the long day sitting. I am waiting patiently for the end of poverty day 15 days from now, my salary. I am wishing for this work for a very very long time and that thought calms me sometimes bcs at last I finally got it. 

I’ve been having a lot of lack of sleep too. Sometimes I am thinking of quitting uni, bcs I’d never wanted to be part of the indoctrination since day 1. But well, escaping reality is a bit hard, especially if you got people who treasures it a lot. And if you also got people who are strictly following and adhering to the rules of the society. 

I sometimes want to go far far away. Away from evrything. Away from worldly matters, but I guess I can’t do it at the moment because they are all I have ever since. I sometimes want to go to an unknown place with just me or a company who solely wants the same thing, freedom,

Freedom could mean a lot of things, but I want to be free of society in certain. I want to live my life unplanned, not systemized like a hermit. But ofcourse along with things I love like technology but ironically within a forest. OR perhaps on the side of a forest along the ocean sides or lake sidess. 

I just have this deep neeed of any body of water like I was once part of it. I am like fish that suffocates if I am away from it. It is like my oxygen. 

I am mainly focusing on my plans right now like building a gaming set so I could stream and buying a new high end phone for me so I could play better. 

I am also looking forward for an improvement of course of me and my team whom I just met but cherish a lot. They are the most beautiful and wonderful people that I just knew.

I am also epnding a lot of time to kdramas especially Alchemy of Souls. It was like It really upholds on its title and got mu stole stuck on their wonderful creation. I love it.

And that’s all for my week. I hope you a happy new year <33.

[steampoweredskeleton]

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Ignpre

[deangirldisease]

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[planetwaving]

okay so um francis @by-thunder gave a brainworm with his tags abt a mamma mia monkees musical so. here's my ideas for

Monkee Mia (working title)

first of all this would have to be a fusion/crossover w some of the og mamma mia characters just bc there is Not enough recurring monkees characters to fill all the roles :')

SO

Micky as Donna -

i think he fits well as the wild character who was getting it on w all three of the others on some greek island . also because i love projecting wanted the story to make sense, micky is trans <3 i can't decide whether he was out when his kid was conceived and the Fathers knew, or if he's come out since and now its like surprise !!! that masc girl you got with 20 years ago is a guy now (and you still find him hot)

Mike as Sam -

basically mike is engaged and getting married too young to try n ignore the fact that he's gay, and obviously it's not going to be a very happy future for mike (or his fiance). and then he meets micky - so quick sidetrack here, i can't think of a way mike would get to greece? on his own? so either the whole story is actually just set in LA or cali wherever instead of greece OR micky gets w mike in california and then soon after goes to greece (this could work for the whole 'i came back 2 weeks later and you were gone' thing) - okay so yeah they have like a few weeks or aonth together? and they fall in love ofc, but then micky finds out about mike's fiance (phone call or letter or the classic finding a photo) and they fight and mike goes back (to texas? to his fiance anyways) and then yeah the whole 'i broke it off w my fiance and came back for you but you were already gone' thing - however that works out

Peter as Bill -

idk most of my reasoning here is that he's also a scandinavian hippy who would 100% just travel around in a boat if he could... he meets micky (if we're doing greece then they meet in greece and peter has a boat like bill does; if just cali then i think he's more of a roaming surfer) at like. the beach i guess, they have a fling for a couple noghts and then part amicably - i think peter's moving onto somewhere else, and they split as friends :)

Davy as Harry -

again my justification here is mainly that i can easily equate the characters - davy as a timid little queer-coded english guy isnt that hard to imagine lmao. anyways instead of how in the movie harry basically sleeps with donna to try n convince himself that ge's straight, this is davy having like. his first gay experience. i think if we do greece then they meet in greece bc davy's doing the whole english boy does the Med thing for like a gap year or whatever, and if we do cali then he's visiting the west coast from new england where he's doing broadway or uni or smth. either way they have like a one night stand, and davy afterwards somehow manages to briefly bump into peter - not knowing who he is of course but i think maybe pete helps him sort some stuff out (they probably meet in a bar or something)

uhhh in terms of the main storyline with the fathers showing up to the wedding, i'm just gonna leave sophie and skye as they are and have their same storyline lol .... that is not the focus here. obviously Sophie's dynamic w each of them will be different to the og dads:

i think mike is the one who teaches her some guitar and is all like omg... youre so quick to learn... and they have that cute little bond w him being a biiit awk over the whole 'micky's kid' thing but he gets over it eventually

peter teaches her about either the boat or surfing and they just have a super chill vibe.. he shows her some photos of him & mick in the hippy days (more later on time period setting)

davy & sophie go into hysterics over what a nutter micky was for just getting it on with this rando he found moping arnd the beach (and talk abt his awakening etc?) and they're besties from there i reckon

okay so about time period setting:

as much as the original mamma mia is iconic for being in like a timeless little greek town, i think it's important to have the time period when all of them met (and sophie was conceived) be the late 60s, bc well. thats when the show characters existed & were young. that doesnt mean it would be specifically set in the late 80s or whatever bc again - timeless greek island (unless we do the beach of course which . idk what would happen w that id just not refer to current events) but yeah . summer of love etc <3

if i did end up writing this i'd probably change sophie's character up a liiittle just to make her more matched with what micky's kid would be like, but probably not skye bc he's a bit 2D anyways (would def change the names but idk what to)

i'd keep tanya&rosie as micky's friends bc theyre honestly perfect as is, and would include them in flashbacks pre much the same as in mm:hwga (rosie would fancy peter etc)

me and my friend had the atrocious idea of calling their trio 'micky and the minnies' instead of donna and the dynamos, which i would definitely not do but i DO think they should still have their singing group bc !!!! micky can sing boy !!!!! and i love the idea of him doing the whole glam rock glitter thing for sophie's hen party <3

anyways yeah plot pretty much stays the same, sophie & sky end up travelling instead of getting married, i dont think mike would outright propose to micky (ambiguous setting is suddenly a bit questionable once you start thinking abt gay marriage/recognition of trans people etc) but they def get together in a more private moment that same day.. im not saying peter/rosie endgame if anything it's tanya/rosie endgame and peter/davy endgame even if both are ambiguous bc i believe thats how the og movie shoulda worked out anyways >:)

this is absolutely batshit wild all over the place. and i think i need to actually write this AU now.... but lmk if you guys have any further thoughts !!

[cassyapper]

ok i saw josuke career discussion and i have to mssg in bc ive been microwaving josuke in my brain for several months n i could SCREAM abt this

so cop josuke. i dont like it either. i think he loves his grandpa but i always imagined them having their issues, since jos is not exactly a model kid. and also (imo) morioh is a small town so jos would have p shit luck getting employed by the same cops he was constantly getting in trouble w/viewed suspiciously by. i just dont see him being super fond of cops. PLUS even if he did start working w them i think he’d chafe under the authority n be too rebellious to last

doctor/nurse jos is also popular and i respect it!! personally i dont see it, mainly bc josuke has shit grades at school n i dont think he’d b passionate enough abt medicine to pull it together n get into uni. BUT i can def see him feeling obligated to study medicine so he can use his powers to help more ppl. in general, i think hes the kinda person to take the weight of the world on his shoulders n feel responsible to protect/help everyone he possibly can. but its for that reason that medical work would b terrible for his mental health, bc theres so many ppl u cant save. and working in a hospital where he’d see tons of ill people, smthn he’s helpless to cure, would prob affect him hard

my personal hc for josuke is him doing smthn related to fashion. either design or styling. im surprised i havent seen this hc before, actually, bc from the lottery episode it seems like he has a big interest in fashion, n he’d have some design/sewing experience from modding his school uniform. he wouldn’t b too stifled by bureaucracy or need to study intensely, and he could possibly work from home to have a more laidback life. plus, if he went the stylist route, it’d b a way for him to help ppl without having the burden of their lives in his hands. im biased abt this headcanon bc i wanna go into fashion (lol) but yeah!! i wanted to share it. i also think before settling on that, he’d b hesitant bc he’d feel obligated to do smthn where he could save lives, and he might work w SPW for a bit but that’d make him realise he doesnt want to seek out a stressful death-filled life

mechanic josuke is also a rly based take, and i think the “helping ppl without being burdened by it” is true of that job too!! plus since jos is p devious he’d get a laugh out of charging ppl $200 for work that quite literally took one second

OH MY GOD ANON THIS IS SUCH A GOOD TAKE HOW DID I NEVER COME UP WITH THIS BEFORE IT WAS STARING US RIGHT IN THE FACE??? you are the only josuke understander im bowing down to you

GOD. FASHION JOSUKE WOULD BE SOOO GOOD FUCK. i think he’d do mechanic as a day job just to make sure he has a stable income as he makes it in the business/as he takes some classes and since like u said he can fix almost anything in like 2 seconds, he has a lot of time to hone his craft in-between clients and just. IMG. IM GOING TO GO CRAZY THIS IS SO GOOD. please im gonna cry. youre so big brained

[siarven]

Hi! I have a question about Dream's Shadow, if that's cool. (Or multiple, I guess.) What's been your favorite part of writing it so far? What inspired you to create the story initially? Are there any (non-spoilery) things you're excited to get to? It's a very cool WIP!

lskdjfdls i am so sorry for the incredibly late response, i saw your ask, went !!!!!!! but it was late and then it was marked as read and i forgot about it again :c thank you so much for your interest and the ask!!! i really appreciate it, even if my brain is stupid sometimes

ANYWAYS

my fave part of writing it has been all the worldbuilding in later drafts, and also just ... having seen how it develops, really? how i refine the world and society and dig in a little deeper in some areas, or how characters have changed through the drafts, or who the characters have become :'3 i've been working on it (on and off) since nanowrimo 2014 and it's come so far and it's changed so much, kinda just like me ... and it's really cool to see that in the story and the worldbuilding and the characters too? :'3 i really don't like editing all that much, but rewriting is Fine Actually, and i love rewriting scenes in a way that makes them Sparkle afterwards, or giving them the certain Something that makes it hurt so much more hehehe (especially on rereads)

so basically, i guess what i love about it is how much it shows me how i have grown as a person <3 but strictly speaking, writing wise.. i don't know, i love every part of the actual writing, i love shaping the words and brainstorming and dialogue and description and creating the worlds and the characters :'3 just not editing. but we are working on that. XD

initial inspiration ... it's so basic, actually? but it's also sort of a spoiler, so i will leave out that part xD it was literally just this kinda very basic "image" of a parent sitting at the bed of their child, who's in a coma after a car accident, and the ghost of the child has their hand on the parent's shoulder, and it's mainly a story about grief, in a sort of bittersweet-sad-beautiful way. And at some point the ghost-child figures out that they can create dreams for their parents, and that they can fly bc they're a ghost, and there was a demon, and the family cat could see (and help) them.

(One day i want to go back to that original concept, it feels like something that might work as a graphic novel?)

At that point i wasn't a very good writer yet though, so I could never have pulled it off in a way where it wasn't boring. So the second draft shifted it into its own fantasy universe, the characters changed a bit, it escalated somewhat.... and now it's still a story about grief and ben is still a ghost and the parents are still grieving and the cat can still see him... so the heart is still there, but it's also sort of shifted, because now it's ava's story too, and it's grown a lot around this initial seed :D

that's another thing i really love about writing. because you take a seed and then the story grows out of it, and who knows if it's a flower or a tree by the end?

Things i am excited to get to ...

So, i am in the 6th draft now. a friend finished her beta read in ... july? i think? and i haven't gone back to it since then due to various reasons (but mainly uni and No Time To Write). previously i'd hoped that i could finally leave it be structurally, and just do line edits and stuff (my beloathed kjdjfd). turns out the first act is still too slow and needs some reworking. and all reworking i'd done previously hadn't done the trick, so i guess shifting things a bit isn't enough!

but thankfully my wonderful friends @ettawritesnstudies (and @thehollowbetween and @lady-redshield-writeswith research) helped me figure out some stuff with how i can solve the issues, maybe. and what i'm most excited about is that this will include the addition of early days sound recording technology now, and possibly also early stages photography (like daguerreotypes maybe?), because it fits into the world and story and plot so seamlessly as though i'd planned it from the start (particularly with the mcs' mother being an engineer/inventor)!

so basically there are some scenes now that offer a view into the past of my characters through really old recordings that degrade as you listen to them, because i have gotten very :hypereyes: at that kind of tech and the wonderful(ly evil) things i can do with it. :3

I am VERY excited about diving deeper into the research and then figuring out how to rework the story, and then actually writing the sixth draft for nanowrimo this year :D

So... sorry for the ramble, thank you so much for the ask and your interest, and i hope you have a wonderful day :D

[you-will-return]

For once, I'm actually doing what I said I'd do in a timely manner.

So this will be jacket post part two: electric boogaloo, bc I didn't want the other one to get too long.

Anyway so yesterday I finished all the sewing (you'll see what I mean) and on Wednesday I finished the painting at Maxi's place (who btw came over and helped me finish my uni stuff so everybody go thank Maxi bc otherwise I'd still be sitting here crying over my shitty printer.... anyways)

Let's get to it

Here we have the front of the jacket (I'll show the collar area in more detail in a sec). On the right pocket I added my LOTSAD pin (yes, I still think the abbreviation is funny), originally I wanted to put the Blind Channel one there but then I realized 'sewing inside of a pocket sucks ass, as does sewing through two layers of jean fabric at once', so here we are. The sewing doesn't look very clean but fuck it (it's just rock'n'roll, okay I'll shut up). Maxi told me 'It would've looked better if you had cross stitched it' to which i replied 'Honey, I'm just glad that it's on there'. Anywho underneath the ghost, between the buttons I added the word(s) 'care fully' (which can be read as one or two words and I kinda like that. It's a Mitski reference but also I just love playing with language).

Here we have the LOTSAD pin (and shitty sewing job) in more detail and as you can see I finally added the GIANTS pin above the Get Up coward.

The Joonas smiley got some company. Tbh sewing the beads on like this was so much easier than trying to sew on the pins.

More beads!!! I decided to make the rays two-colored bc why not? And I know the bead placement is a bit on the nose, but eh who cares? Also I added the birds last minute bc freedom and the sea and all that (in my heart they're evil lil seagulls).

(This is nothing new but I just wanted to show it to y'all colored in)

From bottom to top: The knife (!!) is finally colored in and I couldn't be happier. Imagine walking by someone and then boom KNIFE!! (I hope you can tell how much I love this stupid bloody knife). Above this I added one of my favourite songs off of the new album. But yeah it has a star in the middle, bc they're burning (again lost an arm and a leg on the creativity). And you might notice that these beads are different, and that's bc I did this arrangement at home, where I had a greater variety available :)

My favourite part of the jacket, still. It's so simple and yet it just works. Again, I know that you've seen this before but I just wanted to show it outlined and coloured in :)

Now for the back:

Top to bottom: since my collar is usually down, I put the Watching Over Me mainly here for myself, but it's for good reason. This lyric really means a lot to me on a personal level and it's from the first MCR song I ever listened to (so it's double special), so no one but me (and you guys now haha) has to see it or know it's there, but I still wanted it to be included. Secondly: the Bad Idea back piece is done!!! Yaay!! And the roses don't look like colored in 8s anymore (double yay!!). I'll admit it looks pretty edgy (what about this jacket doesn't) but I really enjoyed painting it. I think I might have also done it out of spite for my 9th grade English teacher, who, after I had done a presentation abt MCR, told me:"Nice presentation. But Anna, all that blood and gore? Is that really necessary?" Yes, yes it is ma'am.

Lastly: the rest of the back. Yeah I kinda just went ham with the beads and pins, but it was fun (for the most part). Bottom to top: The 747 is finally colored in, bc of its position it's kinda reminiscent of an incomplete license plate but if you knew my history with this number, you'd agree that it makes this just that much more fitting.

Above it the Blind Channel beads, kind of as a summary of everything above them.

Then we have Balboa (why is there a heart bead? Bc Maxi had some lying around and I thought it looked pretty). I really like this song and I would give a lot for that skeleton Breakdowns for Breakfast t-shirt.

Above Balboa we have a part of glory for the greedy. No deeper reason for why it's here just 'mwah'. This was the first bead arrangement I sewed on btw and lemme tell you it was a struggle.

Talking about struggle we have the Don't Fix Me pin arrangement that made me want to throw myself into a river. I struggled so much with this but I ended up really liking it. Pink + edgy??? Fuck yeah, that's what I live for. I know the song itself is not everyone's favourite, but I've been listening to it on repeat ever since it came out so lol

Lastly we have the Left To Die beads (yes alive or only burning, again, that song has been living in my head rent free ever since I first listened to the album and not just bc of the jupiter line haha). When I first heard the chorus I was like 'huh' and then i thought about it some more and I was like 'hUH?!?', anywho needless to say this lyric hits me every single time (:

Soooo.... that's the jacket. Edgy, wonky and with a certain.... diy-charm.

Hope you enjoyed this journey and its outcome as much as I did.

Bonus: The diy saftey pin necklace (by me) and saftey pin earrings (by Maxi), that I'll probs wear at the concert. Alongside a Revenge bracelet that I wanted to sew onto the jacket but sadly didn't know where to put.

[softlystarstruck]

Fic Writer Interview

tagged by: @mostlymaudlin and @amywaterwings (y’all each tagged me on a different blog and. neither was this one but this is where i post all my writing stuff so jgjfhgjdk)

name: bee 🐝

fandoms: drarry, snowbaz, lowkey i will always be here for spirk even though i don’t write it anymore

most popular multi-chapter fic: all of my current posted fics are one shots! by hits it’s strike the match (set me ablaze) and by kudos it’s knead, then let rise

actual worst part of writing: time. not in the way you probably think i mean- i LOVE taking the time to write, i love putting in my headphones and sitting down for hours and simply writing. however i wish i could fold that experience down into the very small pockets of time i ACTUALLY have to write in between school and work and general life. so the worst part of writing is i want to spend so much time doing it but they are hours i do not have 😂

best part of writing: this one is hard- i think the feeling of accomplishment that comes with finishing a fic? no matter how long it is, i always feel so proud when i send a fic off into the world because i MADE that, i put my time and my effort and my heart into it. i have a really hard time keeping my focus on creative projects, so when i go onto my ao3 and see how many things ive written i feel so proud of myself for putting my mind to something and seeing it all the way through :) in the writing process itself i think its seeing the world through a characters eyes and having to push the boundaries of my own thinking in order to do so!

do you outline: on the whole, no! but i write mainly short pieces and i write those linearly. i am working on a longer piece rn that has an outline, and i think im going to keep doing outlines for fics that i know will be long from the start

fic ideas you probably won't get to but wouldn't it be nice: oof here we go baby. i have SO many ideas but some just rattle vaguely around in my brain like marbles in a cup. for drarry- stardust au, a whole bunch of half baked eighth year ideas, draco working at a magical craft store, dad fic, a hanahaki fic. for snowbaz i wanna write a uni au where they meet at a tabletop rpg club, and an au where simon never made it to watford for some reason and baz passes out in a london tube carriage bc of how strong simons magic is. but idk if ill ever get to those because, refer to self my callout below

callouts @ me: my wip graveyard is sprawling. all-encompassing. never ending. i have wips that are longer than any published fic i have and they simply languish in my google drive. im just so bad about starting stories and then not finishing them 😂

best writing traits: [dial up sound] idk does …. tenderness count? i just think im good at writing soft moments and thats something to be proud of. i myself have spent a lot of my life very jaded so i am now big on radical softness, and i really try to put that into my fics in a way that makes sense for the characters. i also feel like im pretty good at building specific atmospheres, and telling a complex story in a short amount of words

spicy opinions: none of my opinions are spicy 😂 uhhhh i do think anyone can write about experiences that aren’t their own as long as they make sure they are informed. but thats it really

tagging: okay time to spread this like wildfire into the drarry writing community hehe crack open your writer brains and let me see your brilliance! tagging:

@tackytigerfic @americanmoths @hogwartsfirebolt @onbeinganangel @calypsotempete @the-starryknight @fw00shy @ohdrarry @lou-isfake @bubble-gumhead @moonstruckwytch @drarrymybeloved @amortentiaboys @avenueofesc @orange-peony and anyone else who wants to!

[mrkis]

i hate the goodgirl/badboy trope bc it’s so overdone and unrelatable/unrealistic at times 😭😭 what adult acts the way goodgirlmc does?? homegirl in her 20s at uni, petty judging frat boy strangers, party scenes and people who get around or are popluar like it’s hs or a crime. has never touched alcohol and lives on her own in poverty before being dragged to her first ever college party by someone mega popular?? or mc has ”a past” n she lives the opposite as she was before. bro pls 💀💀 sometimes i just want an mc that is equally as seductive and lively as the boy but doesn’t have to be a cliche rich fuckgirl 😭 but im looking forward to ur fic bc ur talented and anything for you im so sorry i started ranting. i got in a mood about fanfiction in general and how every mc is written. i hate cliches but you make them work ur a wizard <3 (also i hate jenomiwoo and think its more realistic for you to be uncaring abt ur first love after a point and maturing and realize that they were toxic/not in love/wack but it helped you grow after) miwoo x rational calm gf agenda ‼️

i love a lil bit of bad guy/good girl tropes!!! they used to be my favourites but now i'm a whore for e2l!!! anyways!! sure, some good girls in fics are a bit??? out of touch?? with everything i think is ok, i guess you get some girls that don't really like to party, never touched alcohol, judging people (mainly frat boys like you said) and whatnot. i know a few of those people in my area so i'm pretty used to it!!! although, with jeno's mc, she just.. doesn't like it, yk? she's tried it, she's done it. not for her! just wants to do her studies. could possibly maybe have a cheeky glass of wine at home or something, but it just.. doesn't do it for her, yk?? she's not interested in it, and thats ok!!!

and thank you for liking works!!! i hope you'll end up liking 'why you?' when its eventually written :)