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#like of fucking course it was never about hating stan or about wanting to get away from him because of who he is as a person!
godsfavoritescientist · 10 months
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Building off of what I wrote in my fic "Sparks," I'm really compelled by the idea of Ford genuinely no longer being interested in sailing around in a boat with Stan by the time they were seniors in high school.
I like the idea of it not being just a symptom of the resentment that had been building between them, nor it being a dream of Ford's that only paled in comparison to west coast tech, but it being a genuine loss of interest on Ford's end. I think it complicates things even further in some really juicy ways.
Like, imagine going through high school slowly losing more and more interest in the dream you've shared with your twin and only friend ever since you were little kids. How do you break it to him? How do you explain it to him without making it sound like a rejection of him? Without it making him hate you?
How do you explain it without it feeling like a spit in the face to all the hard work he's put into a plan that started out as a way of him comforting you by telling you "it doesn't matter what people say about you, you're going to be an adventurer who sails away into the sunset and never has to hear their mockery ever again, and there will be babes and treasure and heroism, and then they'll all see how cool you really are!"
And all through high school you think to yourself, "he's going to move on to more realistic dreams any day now, and then I won't have to say anything about it!" But no matter how many times you mention something else he could do with his life that he seems interested in, or bring up the challenging logistics of traveling around long-term in a boat, he sounds just as committed to the childhood dream as ever, and completely oblivious to how apprehensive you sound.
So resentment grows, little by little. Because that's easier than confronting the soul-crushing levels of guilt that are building up inside of you, every time you don't take an opportunity to tell him you don't want to do the plan anymore. You don't have a single person in your life who modeled how to have difficult conversations for you. As far as you know, having this conversation with Stan would crush him into tiny little pieces and then he would hate you forever, and you can't stand the idea of losing the only friend you've ever had.
So tensions grow. A lack of interest turns into a bitter resentment that, if you were really being honest with yourself, is directed more at yourself than it is at Stan.
And then the falling-out happens, and it seems like you were proven right. Stan hates you now, and he's never going to forgive you for giving up on his dream. But two can play that game, so you try to hate him too. Because if you hate him too, then maybe it won't hurt as much that he never came back. That he never even turned up at school, or by the boat, or in through your bedroom window in the middle of the night. He knows what dad's like, and how he says impulsive exaggerated things when he's angry, and haven't you both dealt with his harsh words countless times before and been able to dust yourselves off and joke about it later? So why isn't he back at home, joking with you about how absurd your dad acted that night, being impossible and belligerent about ruining your dream, but at least now you're even, because you've ruined his dream too.
-
And now imagine you find out he risked the lives of everyone in existence to bring you back, right after you had accepted your fate was to die killing Bill. It would be terrifying and confusing and infuriating. If he cared so much, why didn't he do something to reconnect with you sooner? Why did he ignore you in favor of trying to make it big without you? Why didn't he take the infinitely safer and simpler action of reaching out to you without you having to track down his address and send a desperate plea for help? You were convinced that he didn't care enough to bother with you unless you had an important enough reason for him to come. But even then, he thought your plans were stupid. He didn't want anything to do with you, not even with the world at stake.
Did he save your life out of guilt? Does he pity you that much? It doesn't add up with what he did in the decade leading up to shoving you into the portal. And the dissonance between the version of him in your head that hates you, and the man who held out his arms to welcome you back to your home dimension, is so strong that you feel like you're being lied to again, like you're back in the depths of gaslighting and manipulation that Bill put you through, even though there's no way that's what Stan is trying to do... right? You can't figure it out, so you run away from it. You don't want to know the answer to whether or not Stan hates you, because you don't know which answer would hurt more, so you try to make him hate you more than ever, because at least then you would know for sure how he feels.
And in the end, after he sacrifices his memories for you, and for the world, things seem clearer. The layers upon layers of confusion and anger and hurt seem to have washed away like drawings in the sand, leaving behind the simple truth: that you two had an argument, and didn't move past it for forty years, and despite everything you put each other through, you both still want to re-connect.
So you sail away in a boat together.
And at first, it's wonderful. It's exactly what you want. It feels like an apology to Stan, and a thank-you for saving the world, and a once-in-a-lifetime chance to heal the rift between you two, and it's good to be back on earth, and you wonder why you ever doubted the dream you two once had.
But then, after the first long journey you spend on the sea together, when you get back home to dry land, Stan is already talking about planning your next adventure out on the open sea. He recaps every adventure you had on the first trip, over and over again, and he wants to chat with you all through the morning and long into the night, and you don't have the words to explain to yourself that you don't have enough social battery for this, and suddenly you're slipping back into the horrifyingly familiar feeling of Stan being overbearing and needing space from him and how could you think that? How could you think that about him after everything he's done for you and everything he's forgiven you for? But the longer this goes on, the more you realize that you still don't want to spend the rest of your life sailing around with Stan. It's great fun in moderation, but the idea of your whole life revolving around Stan and going on adventures with Stan and being in a boat with Stan with no time to be by yourself thinking about your own things and figuring out your own dreams makes your skin crawl with a claustrophobic kind of panic that you still don't know how to put into words forty years after the first time this feeling grabbed you by the throat and ruined your friendship with Stanley.
But the first time this happened, it nearly ruined his life forever. You can't let yourself feel this. You don't feel this. You're happy to spend the rest of your life fulfilling Stan's lifelong dream, and making up for the time you crushed his dream, and sure, maybe he crushed your dream once too, and maybe it would be nice for him to support your dreams like you're now doing for him, but you can't say that. He saved the universe, and it would be horrible and ungrateful and cruel for you to try to voice these feelings, especially when you don't know how to voice your feelings without it making other people feel like you twisted a knife into their gut. So you try to pretend the feeling isn't there.
You go out on a boat with Stan again. You planned out another incredible journey together, and this should be fun, and you should be happy about this, but the unspoken feeling you shoved as far down in yourself as it could possibly go is eating you alive. The worst part? Stan is starting to notice. You have never been good at hiding your emotions. The trick to it has always been to convince yourself you don't feel it at all, and not think about it, and that has always worked like a charm. But whenever the emotion claws its way back up to the forefront of your mind, you can tell Stan knows something is wrong. So you can't even give him the happy ending he deserves. You can't even convince him that you want to be here on the open seas forever with him, like he deserves. And you keep trying and trying to hide it, but Stan keeps asking in roundabout ways, like "You're being awfully quiet, sixer," and "whats that look on your face?" and eventually it comes exploding out of you like a shaken-up soda bottle dropped on its cap.
And then it's like you're back at home in New Jersey again, standing in the living room while dad grabs Stanley by the shirt. It all comes pouring out of you, in the worst possible way, with the worst possible phrasing, like a pandora's box of monstrousness, and Stan tries to fight back against the sting of your words, but you're made out of acid and you're burning through him and you can see it on his face, and there's never any coming back from this, not this time, you'll just have to either jump into the ocean or become a monster forever, so Stan can hate you more easily again, and-
-and at the end of the outburst, you're still on a boat in the middle of nowhere in the ocean with your brother, in dangerous waters, and you have things to do to keep the boat running smoothly.
You can't run away from him. He can't run away from you. You're stuck here for at least a couple more weeks, even if you turned around and sailed back towards shore right away.
-
And the thing that compels me so much here, despite how unbelievably angsty it all is, is that it sets up a situation wherein the Stans might end up forced to actually address the decades of resentment and confusion and wanting-to-reconnect-throughout-it-all that they thought they could gloss over and heal with enough time spent adventuring together on a boat. They might end up forced to actually address the crux of the issue that drove them apart in the first place: Ford wanting a little more space to feel like his own person, and to feel like he's able to have his own dreams, too.
It wouldn't happen easily, nor right away, but if they were stuck together on a little boat in the middle of nowhere surrounded by magical creatures they have to protect each other from in order to make it back home alive, then after they had one fight where they brought up all the things they silently agreed to never bring up again, it would probably happen many more times, and each time it would leave them both angrier at each other than ever, until eventually something honest slipped through amidst all the saying-anything-except-what-they-mean bickering. And once enough of these honest moments slipped through, then they would have a thread to tug on to start to unravel the gargantuan knot of their decades of unresolved conflicts.
And then, eventually, maybe Stan could learn that he can have a good friendship with his brother without needing to be glued to him at the hip, and Ford needing a certain amount of alone time doesn't mean he dislikes him or wants to abandon him, and Ford could learn that he can be honest and have a meaningful connection with someone without it driving them away and making them hate him.
#succumbed to the stan twins angst visions and wrote 2000 words about this#ford pines#ford meta#this turned into a character analysis that almost reads like a fic#godswriting#<- i need to change my writing tag to this#something bothers me a little bit about the solution to their conflict being 'ford appreciates stan more now so he is now fine with-#-boat adventures with stan'. to me it leaves the initial conflict of 'he doesnt want to do that anymore' unresolved#obviously you could easily argue that ford never stopped wanting to go on boat adventures with stan and he just couldnt justify it to-#-himself when compared to the opportunity at west coast tech. but that has one less layer of conflict#compared to the possibility that he truly was not interested in boat adventures anymore. ESPECIALLY if its a manifestation of him#feeling suffocated by the whole dynamic-twins-duo thing#its normal to start wanting a little bit more space especially at that age. to want to have space to figure out who you are#the healthy thing would have been them talking about it and figuring out a compromise. like 'when ford needs space he can spend a few hours#-alone without stan being worried the whole time that it means ford hates him' and 'we still spend x amount of time working on the boat and#-we still chat on the way to and from school every day and hang out at the beach on weekends'#like of fucking course it was never about hating stan or about wanting to get away from him because of who he is as a person!#he literally just wanted to have a little bit of breathing room to be his own separate person. he just didn't know how to put it into words#I really think the crux of it all was them not knowing how to navigate that balance between independence and identity while staying close#so ford misattributing/reducing that feeling to 'I dont have the exact same dream as stan anymore. why does he still have that dream. oh no#feels like a good way of giving that conflict a tangible aspect to it thats easy for the stans to point at and talk about as a way of-#-alluding to the REAL core of the conflict between them.#and of course the show never says 'they sail around the world for the rest of their lives 24/7' so it's not like it Actually Conflicts with#-my interpretation of the conflict and how it should be resolved. but since its the last thing we see happen between them when theyre given#their happy ending. I feel compelled to say 'hey I know them living in the shack together and traveling in a boat every single year sounds-#-really fun and like a satisfying ending but I think they should have a Little Bit more space from eachother than that. Hanging out almost-#-daily but not literally being in the same house and same boat for the rest of their lives. bc if stan was ok with ford asking for that-#-little bit of space and if ford didnt panic and isolate himself from everyone whenever he needs like one hour of alone time? that would-#-feel like a big piece of the puzzle fitting into place for their conflict resolution and growth as characters. to me#and I think they deserve to have all the tied-up-loose-ends and resolved-conflicts and character-growth in the world.
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victimsofyaoipoll · 8 months
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Round 3
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Propaganda Under Cut
Kairi
kairi is the third protagonist of the kingdom hearts series and the third member of the destiny trio, alongside fan favorites sora and riku. sora/riku shippers HATE kairi, and will go out of their way to discount her at every turn. the hate for her ranges from typical "she's a boring bitch" to fans of soriku making five-hour long video essays reassuring their fellow shippers that the big bad kairi won't show up in the next installment – to quote one video, "she's in a box. she's on the shelf. four walls, no door." kairi is the greatest bogeyman the soriku fandom has ever known, to the point where most of said video essays and fanon meta posts focus not on why sora and riku should get together, but rather on why they don't like kairi.
Literally has a 100+ page Google doc fan theory writing her out of the narrative and putting all of her (few) canonical accomplishments onto half of the popular m/m ship (soriku). Don't even get me started on how her memory was completely written out of the canon plot of re:coded. KH is a nightmare to explain so dude trust me she is THE victim of yaoi
She is so fundamental to the plot and themes and narratives of game and yet it is near impossible to find anything about her thats not ship bashing pre-mlm with the other two characters. I dont even care if she ends up with one of the main characters i just want fans to see her as a cool character to love or like, anything other than “annoying comphet girl.” You can write your mlm but pleaae stop inventing comphet where it doesnt exist. She does not even get to spend time with sora ever?? Why does everyone see her as a threat and a thing to destroy?? Let her have friends so help me
Misa Amane
she gets treated in-canon the way fandoms treat female characters that Threaten an m/m ship. it's like, "oh why don't you go sit in the corner and be pretty, misa, while the Men have intelligent conversation and pretend they aren't ten seconds from fucking each other, doesn't that sound nice?" it's infuriating. and MAYBE it's better now but i remember her getting treated the same way in fanfiction too, like we all need to do just as badly by our female secondary characters as fucking tsugumi ohba, but with the added insult of making her be alternately oblivious of the relationship between light and L or actively trying to sabotage it—incompetently, of course, because god forbid misa be allowed dignity or moments of cleverness.
she's one of the first characters I think of when I consider old school fandom misogyny. The annoying bitch and clingy crazy gf allegations were AFTER HER ASS. She's also a lot more intelligent than people gave her credit for, but most seem inclined to take the Very Biased word of our unreliable, narcissistic narrator and his homoerotic arch nemesis and claim that just because she's bubbly and into romance that she's also a complete moron. Which is blatantly untrue. Everyone was afraid of Misa girlbossing too hard. Killing people and devoting yourself to the deranged twink of your dreams even though you know he'll never love you back??? Having a hardcore goth aesthetic and being so Hot even literal Death Gods are into you?? God forbid women do ANYTHING!
Not only is she the victim of yaoi culture, she is the victim of early 2000s misogyny by an author that wanted to introduce a girl character because he knew his male rivals were getting too homoerotic. She is a goth bimbo icon who portrays what I think is one of the few callouts for stan culture and what parasocial relationships can do to both the stan and the idol. The fact that she is a toxic fan of Kira and also hot, funny, sociable is tragic in its own way, which I think the author did try to touch on but was too misogynistic too really get through. Of course, she was reduced to villain status by the fandom and anime alike because she got in the way of the supposed romance in their psychological horror anime.
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sinningforrory · 1 year
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stupid // stan uris smut
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a/n: hey everyone! it's been so long since i've posted and a lot of people have been sending me requests but since my first and only fic i've uploaded on here has gained 1,000 notes i thought i'd gift you guys this fic as a thank you. i'm gonna try and upload a lot more now because i appreciate so much the love my writing gets fr thank you guys so much. hope you enjoy and as always, reblogging really helps me out so if u enjoy, pls don't hesitate!
WARNINGS: dom!stan, submissive!bratty!reader, slight choking, mention of drugs (if you squint) SMUT, majorly NSFW minors please dni, thank you!
WORD COUNT: OVER 6K
SUMMARY: Your parents best friends' son. The picture perfect grade A student of the perfect suburban family. And a cocky douchebag. You hated him. But, since you both got into the same college, Stan has been making it clear that he definitely does not hate you...
Stanley. Even his name irked you. I mean, who in their right mind births a beautiful baby boy and names him Stanley. What a stupid name. It fits him though, that’s for sure. Stupid Stan with his stupid family and his stupid friends and his stupid studying. He was just so stupid that you wanted to bash his brains in any time he so much as breathed around your presence. 
Of course, he hadn’t necessarily done anything to warrant your intense hatred towards him. He just irritated you. You were Jewish too so you’d always see each other at the Synagogue and your parents were enamoured by Stan’s stupidness. They saw it as ‘perfection’ instead though. They were always bothering you about how you should ‘aim to be more like Stan’ or ‘Stan’s parents told me he got an A in this class. So why are you getting a D?’ He drove you insane. You weren’t Stan, you weren’t stupid like Stan so why couldn’t your parents just love you for you instead of comparing you to that stupid, stupid boy.
Due to your parents being very good friends with Stan’s family, you saw each other a lot more than you’d like. And every time you were there you took every opportunity to be nasty to Stan just to wear off some steam. But that made it even worse. It wouldn’t matter if he was a dick to you too. But no. He’s NICE to you. And you know he’s doing it on purpose to get on your nerves because every time he compliments your hair and sees you glaring knives into his eyes, he does a subtle smirk to himself as if he’s fucking won this silly little game you play. He knows he’s driving you insane and he’s proud of himself for it. What a fucking douche.  
It had always been this way. Stan irritates you, you’re a bitch to Stan, Stan eats it up, Stan irritates you, blah, blah, blah. It was an endless cycle of hate. 
However, something had flipped in Stan the summer before you both left for college. Luckily enough, you’d both managed to get into the exact same ivy league as each other so you would be stuck with Stan for the next four years. When you found out you immediately wanted to bash your head into a wall repeatedly until you woke up from this absolute nightmare that was Stanley Uris. 
The news that you had both gotten into an ivy league warranted a celebratory party for the both of you. The idea from your lovely mother, of course, and at said party, Stan was acting a lot stranger than normal. So strange to the point where you were currently hiding in the bathroom with your back against the door breathing heavily as if he was chasing after you and about to knock the door down with an axe.  
It started in the garden. You wore a white summer dress with tiny yellow flowers scattered among it. Stan was looking very punchable in cream khakis and a navy polo. Unbuttoned, of course, because he could never look TOO tidy. You stood by the refreshments, sipping a virgin pina colada when Stan strutted his way over with a teasing grin on his face, ready to ruin your relaxed mood. 
‘So, I guess we’re going to college together. It seems you really can’t escape me, can you, y/n?’ He leaned against the table next to you, taking a sip from his beer. You glared up at him, already infuriated by the fact that he was leaning down with you stood up straight next to him and he was still taller than you. 
‘Oh please, Stanley, don’t pretend to be so happy about this when we both know you are just as excited about this as me.’ 
He gasped in mock surprise before laughing softly at the frown on your face, ‘Oh, come on, princess, you know you love me. I guarantee that you would miss this adorable face as soon as you knew you couldn’t see me anymore.’ 
He smiled at you gently before moving his sunglasses up to rest on his curls and taking a sip of beer. 
You moved to stand in front of him, making a move to leave the refreshments and flee to your room (or anywhere away from Stan). ‘Bite me, Uris.’ 
‘If you insist, princess.’ He smirked at you and folded his arms over his chest, his muscles straining under his polo. 
Your eyes widened slightly, shock evident on your face at his words. He had always been overly saccharine with you but he had never flirted with you so boldly. Shaking yourself out of your daze, you scoffed before walking off with your pina colada into your kitchen for some snacks. 
5 minutes later, you were still stood in front of your fridge, supposedly searching for food but instead, you found yourself staring off into space. You could not scratch that smug image of Stan out of your brain, his words engraving themselves into your memory, messing with your mind. 
Worst of all, you found yourself repeatedly wondering why you liked what he had said to you. Pulling yourself together, you closed the fridge door but immediately jumped as you saw Stan standing right where the fridge door had been resting. 
‘You look a little lost, princess, is everything okay?’ He was stood so close to you that your chests were half an inch away from touching. You gazed into his eyes for half a second before realising what you were doing and coughed before putting some distance between the two of you. 
‘Uh-uhm, I’m fine thank you, Stanley. Just couldn’t find what I was craving.’ 
He nodded his head understandingly before taking a step forward so you were nearly chest to chest once again. ‘What exactly are you craving, y/n?’ 
He hadn’t meant to sound so enticing, or maybe he had, but the way he said that with his gravelly voice and his tiny smirk made your thighs involuntarily clench together. 
‘E-erm, just some guacamole dip. My mom always hides it from me though because she knows I’ll eat it all before the other guests can have any.’ You fiddled with the hem of your dress, avoiding eye contact with the boy in front of you. What had gotten into you, why was he making your confidence dissipate so easily and why were you suddenly acting like a nervous school-girl?
Stan’s eyebrows furrowed before an evil look took over his features. He was planning something, you could tell. And you didn’t like it. 
‘Oh, you mean.. this guacamole? The one on top of the fridge? That I can reach? But you can’t?’ 
Your eyes trailed along his veiny, muscular forearm before they met his slender, mocking hand where you found it gesturing towards... of course: the dip. 
Frustration filled you head to toe as you realised that Stan, once again, had the upper hand. Your jaw ticked as your eyes finally met Stan’s cocky, patronising eyes and you had to resist the urge to make those smug, brown orbs black and blue. 
‘It seems that you have something you need to ask me, darling. Because, let’s face it, we’re not gonna have a stare-off all day in front of this fridge. So, let’s hear it: “Oh, please, Stanley. I need you to get me that dip off the top of the fridge because I was born with incompetent height and I can’t do it without you, Stanley.”’ 
You crossed your arms over your chest as you listened, painfully, to Stan mock you with such arrogance you found it hard to resist whacking him with a frying pan. However, to Stan’s surprise, before he had the chance to continue making fun of you, there was no one standing in front of him anymore. 
Where had you gone? he thought. That’s unlike you, to admit defeat so easily. Where was your usual snarky bite back, attacking him on his ‘unusually long legs’? 
But before he could get too worried, there you were. Returning into the kitchen to fight back to Stan.... with a chair. 
Wordless and emotionless, you put the chair down in front of the fridge, stood on its seat and grabbed the dip, finally retreating from the kitchen, not before throwing Stan a victorious wink before you disappeared around the corner. 
Truth be told, you had no idea how to respond to Stan’s unusual behaviour so instead of arguing back like you would normally do, your mind blanked of insults completely and you did the next best thing that you could think of: beat him at his own game. 
It was obvious that something about Stan had changed since the last time you had spoken and Stan seemed to think he was one step ahead of you. What stupid Stan didn’t know was that you were nowhere near as Stupid as him and knew that the only way to irritate him like you used to was to give him a taste of his own medicine. 
Sure, you weren’t exactly completely against the idea of flirting with Stan for fun. He was obviously a good-looking guy; you knew because he would never let you forget it. And you would never pass up the opportunity to get a hot guy flustered. 
This was how Stan wanted to play? Fine. He’d better prepare to lose. 
It had been two weeks since this little game you and Stan were playing had begun and you couldn’t hold out much longer. The tension between the two of you had sky-rocketed and even the slightest twitch of a smirk in the corner of Stan’s mouth had your panties pooling with desire. 
You had an inkling that Stan was in the same boat as you were as your lingering caresses on his arm or leg when laughing with him and his family seemed to make him blush much easier than before. 
The point of why you were doing all of this was still vaguely swimming around in the back of your mind: do not be the first to give into your temptations. Don’t sleep with Stan. 
However, with Stan so perfectly positioned behind you so your butt met his bulge as he leaned over your petite frame to reach for a glass, you had to take deep breaths to remind yourself once again: don’t sleep with Stan. 
You gulped and took a deep breath of relief once he removed himself from his position behind you to lean on the counter next to you. His gaze burned into the side of your face and you met his eyes briefly just to find him with a cocky smirk plastered on him. 
Your blood boiled (with rage or desire, you didn’t know) but you looked away without giving even the slightest of a reaction. You could never let him know how much his actions affected you. 
It was that dreaded time of the week when you go over to the Uris family’s house for dinner and after eating a delicious meal cooked by Mrs Uris you did the routine of standing in the kitchen and drinking an iced tea with Stan whilst the adults got drunk in the living room. 
Usually, you and Stan would bicker pointlessly during this time of the evening, but tonight it was completely silent between the two of you with only lingering gazes and glares thrown from one to the other. The tension could be cut with a butter knife. 
However, your torment was put on pause as, suddenly, Mrs Uris appeared at the kitchen door. ‘Hello sweeties,’ she hiccoughed slightly, clearly tipsy. ‘I know that the kitchen is very beautiful but you are welcome to go up to Stan’s room if you want. Stan certainly won’t mind a beautiful girl like you to be up in his room, y/n.’ She winked as you blushed and Stan coughed out an embarrassed ‘Mom!’. 
She then made her departure, giggling to herself softly as she went. Stan then coughed to get your attention and gestured with a jerk of his head to the direction of his room, indirectly asking if you wanted to take up his mother on her offer. You shrugged before making your way up the stairs to Stan’s room. 
Stan’s room. What a place to behold. You hadn’t been up there since you were about 12 and had to work with Stan on a class project. It had changed a lot since then. Posters of bands that Stan listened to were plastered all over the walls and clothes were scattered all over the floor, and let’s not forget to mention the faint aroma of marijuana. 
Stan manoeuvred you out of the doorway, his fingers gracing your waist ever so slightly with his bulge pressed against your lower back as he shimmied past you. 
He jumped on his bed, his arms and legs in a starfish position on either side of him, and closed his eyes with a big sigh. 
You carefully sat yourself down next to him on the bed, feeling too hesitant to lie yourself down next to him. He leaned up against the bed frame with his hands behind his head as he studied your appearance precariously as ever. 
‘Why do you hate me?’.
The question took you by surprise. It was so out of the blue and even more so out of character for Stan to be so straight-forward. You blinked delicately before shrugging your shoulders at him. 
‘Do you want the honest answer or the answer that you want to hear from me?’ You pressed, speaking so quiet that it was almost a whisper. 
He glanced swiftly over you for a second before responding, ‘Honest.’ 
It wasn’t like you weren’t expecting Stan to want that answer but the fact that you had to admit it to yourself now, let alone to Stan, was enough to make you faint from nerves. 
You looked away from Stan and fiddled with your fingers as you spoke in hushed tones. ‘I envy you. You have better grades, better looks, better charisma, better music taste, better style... a better life. You are better than me in every way. And I despise you for it.’ 
A masked look of shock ghosted over Stan’s face before it was replaced once again with a stony expression. He sat up straight so that your knees were touching and he placed a hand on the centre of your thigh. 
You looked up at him and connected with his gorgeous hazel eyes. He ran his tongue quickly over his lips before his eyes locked onto yours. ‘Now, we both know that’s not true.’
It was as if your body was moving with a mind of its own. Slowly, you were leaning in towards Stan as if you were magnetised to him and to be too far would hurt you in unimaginable ways. ‘How do you mean?’ You breathily responded, your heart pulsing rapidly.
He was so close to you now that you felt his breath against your lips. ‘Because I envy you ten times more.’ And with that closing sentence you felt his lips crash immediately into yours. 
All the tension from the last few days swarmed around you both like a storm of arousal and need. His kiss was passionate and rough as he pressed his lips into yours with so much want but his hand on your leg was gentle and sweet as he caressed your inner thigh gently with his thumb. 
The constant nagging of your brain screaming at you ‘Don’t sleep with Stan’ was shoved into the back of your mind falling to deaf ears as Stan moved his hand ever so slightly higher up your leg, falling to play with the hem of your dress as he detached his lips from yours to suck on your collarbone with the obvious attempt of planting a hickey. 
Stan skillfully moved you both up to the headboard so that he could deepen the passion of your kiss and you quickly maneuvered yourself so that you were now straddling his lap. 
His growing erection pressed into your centre as he trailed his smooth hands down to the flesh of your hips, his lips dragging down your jaw to find solace in the crook of your neck.
You felt like you were on fire, Stan’s touch was magnetic and no matter how you’d been trying to resist him, it was impossible. You were addicted to how he made you feel. 
Neediness began to bubble through your tummy and you could tell Stan was feeling the same way as his hands were digging into your hips harder than before. Then, his hands began to carefully drag your hips across his hardness, slowly at first. 
You could feel every bump of his length through his thin sweatpants and your hands moved down his toned body to fiddle with the hem of his t-shirt. 
His hands began to move faster, dragging your thin panties over his hard, clothed dick. He detatched his lips from your neck when you began to let out tiny, little moans of pleasure, thankful for the little bits of stimulation Stan was feeding you. 
His eyes trailed down your body, admiring every single bump and curve: the strap of your dress falling off your shoulder, your soaking panties rubbing against him as his hands moulded perfectly with the fat of your hips. They then fell on your face, growing darker at the sight of your furrowed eyebrows, messy hair and plump, red lips from you biting down too hard on them. 
Likewise, you were admiring Stan, his sharp jawline clenching and unclenching every time you dragged yourself over his most sensitive spots, his hair uncharacteristically messy from your hands tugging on his curls. He noticed your movements speeding up and he flashed you a dangerous grin; a grin that would make even the biggest prude on the planet drop her panties to her knees. 
Acknowledging your shaky hands still fiddling with the hem of his t-shirt, he slowed the movement of your hips with his strong hands and dragged you painfully slow now, refusing to let you continue with the rapid pace you’d set before. 
“You want this off, baby?” referring to his t-shirt. You nodded shyly, hands still fiddling with the hem. 
“Want me to take it off for you? Are you too dumb to do it yourself?” He stared up at you with a patronising look on his face. You groaned annoyedly, but deep down your cunt throbbed with anticipation.
“Just take it off Stan, don’t be a dick.” You glared down at him but your glare immediately switched to a look of shock as Stan’s hands had stopped your hips moving completely now, denying you any release that you were desperately craving. 
Narrowing his eyes playfully, he tutted at your lack of control. “Now, that’s no way to ask for what we want is it, sweetheart?” The corner of his lips tugged up satisfactorily as he took in your menacing glare, but also your glossed over eyes indicating your desperation for his cock. 
‘Oh, how cute,’ Stan thought pityingly. ‘The poor, little slut’s already gone dumb and I haven’t even fucked her yet.’
You breathed through your nostrils fiercely before succumbing to the begging of your aching clit and gave Stan your best doe eyes before tugging pathetically at the hem of Stan’s crumpled shirt. ‘Please take it off Stan, I’ll do anything, please..’ You pressed down on his length for extra measure just to make sure he would give you what you needed. 
A low hum of appreciation mixed with a strangled groan of pleasure escaped Stan’s throat and he mulled it over for a few seconds with that irritating smirk plastered on his face before nodding, clearly satisfied with your begging before he lifted his slender fingers to his collar and removed his shirt - finally. 
You took a moment to appreciate the art that was Stanley Uris' abs and sighed contentedly. It seemed your hands had a mind of their own as you wasted no time in rubbing your hands up and down his beautiful torso, gliding over the valleys and hills of his defined muscles.
"Enjoying yourself there, princess?" Stan chimed, clearly cocky that you'd spent about 30 seconds just groping him absentmindedly.
Tearing your eyes away, you glanced up at Stanley's face, adorned with a shit-eating smirk, one of his hands resting behind his head, the other still gripping the fat of your hip, rubbing gentle circles into your flesh.
Slightly embarrassed but, nevertheless, growing quite needy now, you rolled your eyes.
Eyes narrowing at the evil spawn, you thought 'The ego of this man is absolutely atrocious. How dare he try and make fun of me for admiring his physique when if I decided to strip naked right now, his reaction would probably beat mine.'
And then it clicked.
Focusing back on Stanley's disgustingly smug face, you did something you'd never done for Stanley Uris in your entire life.
You gave him a real genuine smile.
The apples of your cheeks beamed down at him and your eyes sparkled lovingly at the boy who was now slightly confused and, albeit, a little bit scared.
Slowly, you leaned down over Stan so your breath tickled his nose and your lips brushed gently against his, just in time to see his cheeks tinge red and his eyes flutter closed, like a naïve teenage girl who was experiencing her first kiss.
Aw, how cute.
Finally, you pressed your lips to Stanley's, so softly Stan thought he might've been kissing a cloud, and just left them there, in a gentle peck, before sitting up again to admire the look of bliss on Stan's face.
His eyes were fluttering open again and his breathing was shallow but fast.
This was the real face of Stan; he had finally taken off his mask for you.
He was so pretty, obviously you knew that already, but you couldn't get lost in his beauty again or your plan wouldn't work.
Then, when he dazedly smiled up at you and made to pull your head down so he could kiss you again, you teasingly began to lift up the hem of your dress until it had been lifted over your head and discarded somewhere on Stan's bedroom floor.
There you sat, on Stanley's clothed, throbbing cock, in just your white silk panties, the little bow just oh so enticing, and your bare, perky breasts on display for Stanley's greedy eyes.
His lips parted ever so slightly as he not-so-discreetly took in a sharp intake of breath. His eyes roamed hungrily over your exposed chest, and you knew you had him when his needy little hands reached up to thumb your erect nipples.
Arrogantly, you smirked down at him, your sweet, loving smile erased. However, Stan failed to notice, too enamoured by your naked body, like a toddler in a candy store.
"Aw, you're like a needy, little puppy, aren't you Stanny?" Your heart beat fast as you finally dropped the sentence you'd been waiting to release since Stan's cocky demeanour had surfaced.
Stan froze as he realised what you had done and his jaw clenched automatically, clearly embarrassed that he had let you entice him just how he had you not even a few minutes ago.
Narrowed eyes were glaring into yours and your confident façade faltered slightly as you realised how deep in shit you were now.
He was gonna ruin you.
However, Stan didn't flip you over dominantly so he was on top of you, or rip your panties off in anger like you had expected him to.
Gradually, he eased himself up his headboard so his back was resting comfortably against it and so the two of you were eye-level, 'innocent' doe-eyes levelled with furious, narrowed eyes.
His hands gently gripped you hips and moved you a little further up his chest, so he could remove his sweatpants, so slow and so patient you were so confused.
He looked deadly, that's for sure. But you'd expected him to be rough with you, teach you a lesson for being so naughty. All in all, other than being clearly vexed, he was treating you like you were a china doll.
As soon as his sweatpants and boxers were discarded, he moved you back to your old spot on his lap and carefully caressed your hips, his thumbs hooking under the straps of your thong and pulling at the sides, fiddling with them gently while intently drilling into your eyes with his own.
"You wanna be in control, huh, sweetheart?" He muttered so quiet you could barely hear but so full of malice your heart immediately sped up.
You had no idea what to say. No, you didn't wanna be in control. You wanted Stan to bend and contort you into any position he wanted, you wanted him to fuck your cunt until you couldn't even form a coherent word, you wanted him to paint the canvas of your body purple, pink and black, in the form of hickeys, bruises and mascara stains.
And you knew he knew that.
You knew by the look on his face, the restraint in his jaw, the rage in his eyes that he definitely did not want that either.
So why was he doing this?
Just as your brows started to furrow in confusion, Stan's thumb had started to rub harsh but deliberate circles over your clothed clit and you let out a gasp.
He tilted his head to the side slightly, furrowing his brows in faux confusion. "Is that... not what you want, baby? You see, I'm just a needy little puppy, right?" He spat at you, evidently fuming but clearly enjoying seeing you in such a state.
You shook your head and dropped your it onto Stan's shoulder, moaning softly as he used one hand to hook your panties to the side while the other found your soaking wet hole and gently inserted two very long fingers.
But, immediately he removed them.
Your head shot up in irritation but you relaxed and hummed contentedly as you realised that Stan was finally lining himself up with your entrance.
You lifted yourself up slightly to make room for his 'oh my god that's scarily big why am i only just noticing this' cock, fluttered your eyelashes closed, and waited for the stretch of him pushing up into you... but it never came.
The first thing you saw when you opened your eyes was Stan's eyes, still level with yours, looking bored and his hands, once again, behind his head, biceps flexed and causing a big distraction for you.
He looked at you pointedly, but, realising you still didn't get it, rolled his eyes and motioned for you to sit on his cock.
At this point, you would've jumped off a cliff if Stan asked you to if it meant he would grant you some form of release, so you carefully began to lower yourself down onto his tree-trunk of a dick, the stretch of it stinging slightly but the depth of it stimulating you in all the right ways.
You let out a guttural moan as you sat on the base, his cock bottomed out inside of you. You gripped Stan's toned shoulders with force and wiggled about slightly, trying to adjust to this new, amazing feeling and, as you wiggled, you noticed a slight tremor in his mask as his jaw clenched and his eyebrows briefly furrowed in pleasure.
But, as quickly as it faltered, it reappeared and Stan's stoic, unimpressed gaze fell on you once again.
"Well?" He rasped, as if what he wanted was the most obvious thing in the world. "You're in control, right, babe? I'm not moving a muscle."
You knew immediately that he was not kidding, so you bottled up the impatience you had for this stupid, stubborn man and put your game face on.
You could get off without help from Stan, of course you could. You didn't need his touch when you could do a perfectly good job with your hips and your hands.
'Fine.' You thought, glaring at Stan with pure hatred in your eyes. 'Suit yourself.'
So you began to move up and down on Stanley's cock, feeling every vein and twitch as you dragged your walls all over his length, coating it in your slick.
You gripped Stan's flexed biceps, his arms unmoving from behind his head as his eyes flickered between watching your face slowly morph into a dreamy, fucked-out expression, soft, pretty moans escaping from your parted lips every time the tip of his cock would prod at your g-spot, and watching your glistening, stretched out cunt swallow up his length, each time producing more and more slick so every time you slammed back down on his base, you could hear a squelching noise.
The only sign Stan was giving away of him holding any emotion was the twitch of his jaw and brow growing more frequent as the speed of your bounces grew quicker and harsher.
Soon, your bounces grew erratic as you craved your release, the only noises in his room being your desperate whimpers of pleasure, the sound of your wetness, and skin slapping on skin, along with the occasional grunt of approval from Stan.
However, you started to grow tired and out of breath as it had been nearly 5 minutes of you bouncing up and down on Stan's length, with no help from him and your determination to beat Stan at his own game was overwhelmed by your desperation to cum, and you knew you had to admit defeat because you were never gonna cum if you carried on like this.
Reluctantly, you sank down onto Stan and stilled with him deep inside you as you breathed heavily and whimpered with the desperation to cum deep in your tummy, your clit throbbing, begging for release.
Stan's furrowed face quickly changed to that of faux sympathy as he moved his hands to rest on your waist, rubbing gentle circles into the skin. "Oh baby, are you tired? Do you need my help?" He asked, patronising you just a little bit further by stretching out 'need' just to annoy you.
You had no time to be annoyed, however, because you could feel your release creeping just that little bit further away from the loss of stimulation, so you nodded your head frantically, practically begging Stanley to help you with your pathetic little doe eyes, glossy and desperate.
"Please, Stanny, please I need it, I need you, just please make me cum." You whined, your lips ghosting his ear, and gently kissing his cheek just for good measure.
That was all Stan needed to hear as he grabbed your neck, squeezing gently as he brought your face back to his and kissed you harshly, bruising your lips with his teeth as he dragged your lip with him, pulling away, and then releasing it.
"See, that wasn't so hard was it!" He smiled gently at you, pecking your plump, red lips and squeezing your neck in approval, before he moved his hands back to your waist, his grip turning nasty and he lifted you up right to his tip, then plunging his hips upwards into yours.
You choked on your moan from the sheer force of his thrust but soon gained your voice back as he continued his rough, rapid thrusting up into your eager pussy, practically dripping, begging for a long overdue orgasm.
You collapsed your tired aching body on top of Stan, your head buried in his neck, muffling your high-pitched moans from the ears of your drunk parents downstairs.
Stan moved his hands down to your ass and gripped the flesh harshly and his thrusts were slamming repeatedly into a spot that made you clench fiercely down on him and shriek with overwhelming pleasure.
Stan groaned into your ear as you continually clenched around him, whispering filthy praises into your ear making your legs tremble and your stomach flip as your impending orgasm was getting closer and closer.
"Can you hear yourself, princess? Can you hear the noises your pretty pussy is making?" The squelching of your wetness was embarrassing to say the least and you could feel Stan smirking without even having to look at him.
As he kept hitting that same spot, you could feel yourself so close to the edge as your legs trembled and your moans grew louder and higher.
"I'm gonna- I'm gonna come, Stanny." You managed to babble out through your whimpers as you felt that overwhelming rush of pleasure build up deep inside you.
Stan lifted your head up and grabbed it with both of his hands whilst still thrusting repeatedly in and out of your sopping cunt, forcing you to look into his eyes.
He had a look of pure concentration adorning his face, brows furrowed, jaw clenched and hair messy, letting out little breathy moans of his own every now and then.
"That's it princess, I wanna see that pretty face when you come all over my cock." And the coil snapped.
You let out a scream of pleasure as your entire body jolted, your orgasm washing over you, your toes clenching and your pussy spasming around Stan's length.
You collapsed onto Stan once again, letting out tiny moans, clearly exhausted from the intensity of the orgasm Stanley had given you, and the spasming of your cunt had clearly not been lost on him as his relentless thrusting had begun to grow sloppy.
Stan was moaning quite loudly in your ear now, a death-grip on your ass cheeks as he fucked up into you, chasing his own high.
You knew he needed a little push so you sat up slightly so you could whisper in his ear breathy and raspy like someone who was recovering from one of the best orgasms they'd ever had in their life, "I want you to come inside me."
The words that make every man orgasm on the spot did not lose their effect on Stan as he let out a loud groan of ecstasy and his thrusts slowed until they came to a stop, clearly having done what you asked.
He dropped his forehead to yours and grabbed your hands, fiddling with them as you both caught your breath.
Holy shit.
You didn't know what to do as you both just lay there gathering your thoughts, attempting to comprehend what just happened.
However, you knew you couldn't stay in this post-orgasmic bubble forever so you gently lifted yourself off of Stan's softening dick and got up to look for your dress.
You were halted, however by a hand closing around your wrist.
Turning around, Stan was lazily grinning up at you with a look of victory on his face as he was dragging you to lie back down on the bed with him and you couldn't help but smile back at him, full of a mysterious feeling for the boy who was just so beautiful.
How could you say no?
Climbing back into bed with him, you both turned to face each other, him still grinning at you, and you studying each and every freckle and blemish on his skin, realising that you loved each and every one of them.
You loved them.
Oh my god.
You loved Stan.
Suddenly, you burst out laughing and Stan jumped slightly before a grin erupted back onto his face as he asked what was so funny.
You managed to get through your laughter, barely, the words that you never thought you'd say in your life. "I- I'm in love - with - with you." Before you immediately started giggling again uncontrollably.
Stan joined in on your laughter, his shoulders moving up and down from the force of his laughs as he breathed out "I'm in love with you too."
You both laid there giggling uncontrollably like a pair of middle schoolers, laughing at your own stupidity.
Once the laughter died down you smiled up at Stan and nuzzled yourself into his chest, planting a few soft kisses there as he pulled you in closer and buried his nose into your hair.
You were drawing shapes on his arms, daydreaming in the comfortable silence when you heard Stan mutter into your hair something inaudible.
You sat up gently looking at him quizzically for a second until you noticed the look of pure adoration on his face that was directed to you before he said gravelly and clearly exhausted, "I hate you so much." before he buries his face into your neck and peppered you with kisses.
You giggled and whispered, "I love you too, stupid."
425 notes · View notes
reareaotaku · 7 months
Note
Hello it's me Rachel. Listen um sorry for the bother you but can you make a yandere losers club headcanon movie it 2017 ?
It's no bother! Of course I can!
Yandere Losers Club Headcanons
Characters: Bill Denbrough, Eddie Kaspbrak, Richie Tozier, Stanley Uris, Beverly Marsh, Mike Hanlon, Ben Hanscom [Also, I looked up the Jewish stuff for Stanley, so if I got anything wrong lmk]
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Bill Denbrough
He gets really shy around you
Stutters a lot and he never really gets over it, no matter how he tries
You're way out of his league and he's surprised when you ask him out
But oh my god, you really want to date him
"Do you want to go out with me?"
He looks at you shocked, his mouth on the floor. At first, he thinks you're trying to pull a prank on him or making fun of him, but you're dead serious
"Oh- W-w-what?"
"Do you want to go out with.... me?" You gesture to yourself at the end, your confidence quickly fading in fear you were about to be rejected
"Uh-uh-uh, um...y-ye-yeah. I'd l-l-l-love to."
Now it's your turn to blush and you smile, "Great. That's great. So what now?"
"I don't know..."
It's a little awkward at first, but you both eventually get over it
His friends tease him, but Bill always brings up about how they're all single [It usually ends the teasing]
He always dresses up whenever he's going to see you
He just wants to look his best
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Eddie Kaspbrak
You meet at his favorite place, the pharmacy
He knew who you were and you vaguely knew who he was
He had a huge crush on you and when he saw you, he nearly shit bricks
He quickly put the stuff he was holding back on the shelf, while accidentally knocking stuff down
"Uh, you're Eddie, right?"
He awkwardly laughs, his face turning a light red, "Uh, yeah. Y/n?"
"Yeah. What are you doing?"
"Nothing!" He's quick and nearly yells it at you, causing you to flinch back. He instantly felt bad about it
You only knew two things about Eddie; He's a germaphobe and his mom is crazy
"You're that germaphobe, right?"
His eyes widen and he quickly shakes his head, "No! I'm not scared of germs. That's crazy," He laughs it off, moving his hand back and forth. He blushes when hearing you laugh and he looks away from you
"You're really cute. Do you want to hang out?"
"Hang out? You and me?"
"Yeah, there's actually a diner close by-"
"Of course. I mean yeah, that'd be cool"
You start hanging out more after that and Eddie is secretly losing his mind
You're hanging out with him
Wow- He feels like he's dreaming
When you ask him to be your boyfriend, he's sure that he's dead and in heaven
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Richie Tozier
You both fucking hate each other when you first met
You bully the hell out of each other, trying to get the last word
"Why are you late?"
"Sorry, I was fucking your mom."
"Well, I'm glad you could enjoy someone's mom since you don't have one"
He rolls his eyes, mocking you, because he has no insult to throw back without sounding like he was offended
Things change when he gets older and he realizes that he likes you
it started when he'd see things in his everyday life that reminded him of you
At first he was irritated and he wanted to destroy those things [Flowers, rocks, tree bark, a cloud, the way his food is placed, a game/game character, etc]
But then, he realized these things made him happy. You made him happy, even when he tried to fight it
He began to cherish these things and anything he could preserve and keep, he would
He has a shrine dedicated to those things. Nothing ever directly linked to you, but just things that make his mind go to you
Neither of you will ask the other out, because you two are two prideful- Actually, it'll be an accident when one of you confesses
You two will be fighting and one of you will comment about how the other is pretty/handsome as an insult and the other turns around and is like "You like me?" You'll be blushing and the person who insulted the other will deny it, but whoever was insulted will be like "I like you two."
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Stanley Uris
Stan is very mature for a boy his age and that's what attracts you to him
He doesn't really notice you at first, because he doesn't have time for dating and he's more worried about keeping his things in order
You try approaching him multiple times, but you usually get shrugged off
You can go to the temple and wait until after Prayer hall, Shacharit, or the morning blessings, but he'll probably spot you and avoid you. If you're not Jewish, you'll approach his father, the Rabbi, telling him about your interest in the culture
"You can't just be Jewish. You know that right? It's a long progress-"
"I'm okay with that. I'm interested in the culture, language, and history"
He's impressed with your knowledge and interest that he's willing to take you under his wing
Stanley then becomes jealous, because you're becoming closer with his father than he ever was
You get progressively better at speaking from The Torah
"There's this girl who keeps coming to the Temple. I've been avoiding-"
"Wait, there's a girl who's actively seeking you out and you're avoiding her??? Because???"
Stanley rolls his eyes, "It-"
"Is she ugly?"
"No-"
"Are you gay?"
"What? No-"
"Then why are you avoiding her?"
"It's stupid-"
"Spit it out."
"Well, she's not even Jewish, but my dad treats her like she's been going to the Temple her whole life. So, she learns a little Hebrew so what? Anyone can do that."
"Oh, you're jealous and have daddy issues. Got it"
His father acts kind of like your dad. Tries setting you up with a good guy so you'd be set for later in life. Get you incredible connections
When you'll finally get him alone, he busts. He yells at you and he realizes all his anger about his father out on you
Though, when he sees you cry, he quickly stops and he feels so bad
He didn't mean to make you cry. God he felt so bad
He quickly apologizes and this creates a friendship between you both
You can tell him any secret. He'll never tell a soul
You can depend on him for anything. You're the only thing his father likes about him
"Why can't you have Y/n's dedication? She wasn't even born into a Jewish family."
He complains to you about his father, and you're always open to listen to him
Though, he's scared of nearly everything, so you usually are the braver one in the relationship
You have to beg him to go anywhere with you, because he doesn't like being around people
He just sticks with you the entire time
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Beverly Marsh
She was very confident when approaching you, but it was fake
She's the type of person to lean on some boxes and then they fall over
She loves brushing and playing with your hair
She thinks it [your hair] is so pretty
She'll hum to you while she brushes it/plays with it
She asked you out. She was very bold about it
She goes after what she wants and she wants you
She'll make sure the moment is perfect
You're alone and the night is beautiful [Though nothing like you]. The wind is blowing just right and the light from one of the post is shinning your face like a halo
If you ever get into a fight with her, she'll avoid you for days/weeks
She doesn't want to, but it's a tactic she knows will get you crawling back
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Mike Hanlon
He puts your needs before his own
He's sweet and whenever you have a problem he's always there to listen
He's a smart kid and will always help you with your homework
And by help, I mean he'll do it for you
Hope you like band music, because that's his favorite type of music
He does have a tiny little issue where he lies to make you happy. He's scared of losing you and just wants to keep you close
He doesn't do it on purpose, it kind of just happens
When you find out, you're livid and he understands, but he doesn't apologize. He think he's doing the right thing
You can be mad at him, but you'll always get over it, because you can never be mad at him for long
He doesn't gaslight you on purpose, but he does do it sometimes
"So what, you don't love me anymore?"
"Of course I love you!"
"Well, you're sure not acting like it-"
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Ben Hanscom
He's really insecure about himself and his weight, thankfully you make him not feel like he's a pig
In fact, you don't mention it all; It's not something you notice
You always pick up when he's sad and always do whatever it takes to cheer him up
You try and help him cope with it healthy
Though, as he gets older, he starts to work out and you go with him. You don't want him to feel like everyone's staring at him or something
Whenever he's feeling like people are judging or staring you'll always divert attention to yourself, whether it's wearing something crazy or just making yourself look different and wild, you're willing to have people judge you as long as he doesn't feel judged [Does that make sense?]
He never judges you. In fact, he thinks you're way to good for him
Everything you do for him just makes him realize you're to good for him
If you're ever insecure, he's surprised
"What? You're like the prettiest person in the world! " He's absolutely flabbergasted
Absolutely adores you and follows you like a puppy
Practically attached to your hip
Bro's a little dependent on you ngl
219 notes · View notes
uhgood-girl · 7 months
Text
why jikook?
i've been asking myself this a lot recently bc well, why them? why not tkook? or ynmin? hell, jihope even, they're underrated as hell honestly, have you seen that hot tub video? hobi was ready to unhinge his jaw to swallow jimin whole (and who (jk) could blame him.)
but jikook, in a not joking way, hits different. they always have. it's been years at this point that i've been deep in this rabbit hole (within the larger bts rabbit hole, my god, how deep does it go) but i don't recall making the conscious decision to fall in.
maybe a little background?
i'm a fake love army. actually, if we're getting technical, i'm an outro tear army bc it was in the comments of the freshly released fake love music video that i saw someone recommend outro tear if i enjoyed fake love and then it was over for me. extremely not fake love at first listen, who's voice is second on this track? i NEED to know. i'm a yoongi/rapline bias to this day. fake love still fucks though, don't get me wrong, it's a never skip for me.
for that first year and then some, i consumed backlogged content like it was my day job. i am a prone to hyper-fixations hermit, basically, who was going to stop me? my therapist? nah, she picks her battles.
i watched everything i could get my grubby little hands on like someone would be testing me on it later. (shoutout qdeoks, you were so real) i didn't open stan twitter for the first time till probably the end of 2018, really just in time to be slapped in the face full force with the shitshow that was a hate campaign against these boys i was deeply invested in by then, the likes of which i had never experienced in an online space up to that point. it was a truly, truly wild era, don't ever let anyone tell you differently.
all that to say, i've been here for a hot minute and i developed my own first impressions on bts and the members as individuals in a vacuum. no one had to point jikook out to me, they stuck out on their own.
potentially relevant disclaimer before we continue: i am really really queer. i grew up in the united states conservative deep south and had to change high schools my sophomore year bc i was outed and then violently ostracized for being in a relationship with my same sex best friend at the time. it is safe to say i have a lot of feelings about and experience even when it comes to having to be low key (understatement lol) about who you love. i am not here just to make my barbies kiss.
actually, on that note, jikook wouldnt even be my chosen barbies out of bts. if we're in true fantasy delulu hours here, i would want yoonjin to be real. god, that would be the stuff, they're so old married as it is. peak romance.
i think the first place jikook ever truly caught my attention were the memories dvds. jimin has always been a sweet, bby angel taking care of all his members but i remember thinking that he seemed to pay a little extra, special attention to jungkook. and of course, why not, jk's the maknae after all. all of them have always been doting on him and deservedly so. but in those briefly shown really serious, quiet moments, jimin was often first in line. a spot very easy for him to obtain tbh as jk never seemed to be very far from him anyway. maybe if you've never in real time lived the satellite jeon accusations (hi pandemic army, bless you, i hope you make it to 2025 when we have them all back without restrictions) you might find them easier to dismiss but it was so consistent back then in all of the content being released. and once noticed, i don't know how anyone ever un-notices it. but i was in deep before i even realized the water was boiling.
should i talk about why not tkook? or ynmin, for me? i'm just pulling those as examples bc i know they're the popular contenders here but all joking in the beginning of this post aside, none of the other members interpersonal relationships, in any configuration (sadly, RIP yoonjin romance), have ever struck me as anything other than puppy crush/deep friendship/family. and that's not bc i don't think over half of those men aren't queer in some form or fashion because WHEW, that is an entirely different post and we simply do not have the time to unpack rn but it's not for lack of looking.
i started in a vacuum, but i have by no means stayed there, i walked in all of those front doors and sat down and said "convince me." i've got the time and lack of life, i am ready to be won over. what have i missed?
to this day i still regularly try and check my own confirmation bias, i'm obviously looking for jikook at this stage but i'm still ready on my toes if any of the others want to get crazy. (yoonjin i am rooting for you, we're all rooting for you)
and i'm not here to really persuade or sway anyone one way or another either. there are a 1000 other blogs on this site that can probably offer you better explanations, specific clips, and detailed break downs of moments throughout the years and even then people are going to see what they want to see. i just wanted to write some of my own thoughts down finally.
though...i guess if i had to point to any one single piece of "evidence" it would definitely be tried and true gcf tokyo? but if watching that the first time didn't ring through you like a gunshot, i def don't think there's anything i could say beyond that.
honestly, i think so much of "why jikook" for me boils down to the pit in the bottom of my stomach that i used to get when i first began to notice them. when i got past the initial warm fuzzies inspired by the sincerity of their interactions, my immediate second emotion was concern.
i remember the first time i heard some of the other boys make an offhand joke about them being a couple and i got anxious, fast. i thought hide, hide better, please be safe. i began to pay extra attention to the other members in general too when jikook would do things and felt like i could sometimes see a similar anxiety to my own in their expressions. for a long time, i just worried about them and where i saw other people rejoice in their more obvious moments, i was slow to celebrate.
despite my initial hesitation, it's now been about 5 years since the first time they ever made me double take. they're a few years younger than me but i feel like we've been growing up together. (parasocial? idk her.) they're less conspicuous these days, and for lots of obvious reasons, but i feel like overall, their confidence in themselves and each other is quite high. i know that's probably a funny thing to say in light of this last week especially, but i stand by it. i've seen this song and dance before. i have managed my own expectations in the past, taken full steps back only to be beaten anew over the head so many times with enough "coincidences" i felt borderline foolish to try and deny anything. jikook are truly some sort of neuro-spicy pattern recognition drug, i swear.
and i've never really gotten to talk about any of this with anyone before! i'm shy irl, and shy online apparently bc i have just been lurking around the outer lines of this circle this whole time like some creepy creep but i've decided i'm over it. fuck it. growth.gif. idk that i have anything important or new to contribute to the conversation but my god, no one else seems to let that stop them so i might as well take my turn on the soapbox, no?
so 📢 JIKOOK REAL (?) jikook sus. jikook make bandaged queer little heart go boom boom.
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yuikomorii · 4 months
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After thinking more deeply about it, people shouldn’t get mad when seeing the majority shipping AyaYui because they are the most perfect for each other…not always in the good way. They are both obsessive weirdos that are unable to communicate properly and end up doing so much dumb shit that not only hurts them but also the ones around them.
Now I’m not saying they are the most problematic characters in the game, but they just are such menaces for whoever is connected to them. They be wondering why Yui wouldn’t make such a good couple with Subaru and Azusa but the reason is that they’re exactly too soft for her. They just want a kind and motherly girl but Yui keeps putting them in uncomfortable situations, doesn’t respect their boundaries and is unable to comprehend their introversion. Ik she was in a dangerous situation at first but that’s over after the second game, isn’t it? They started dating so if that’s what she truly wanted, she has to take responsibility for that and bring her brain to work.
Now about Mr. Yours Truly, he wasn’t irredeemably bad in the first game but he was such an asshole, let’s be frank. After the first game, Yui started treating him poorly or, again , not paying attention to whatever he was going through but I just couldn’t feel bad for him. They both fucked eachother up so bad but in an equal way so I can’t say any of them is better than the other, like some of their individual fans do. I’m not saying this about the Admin but some Yui and Ayato stans must actually hate the characters and only love their fanon version of them. Just because they forgive their abusers and are friendly doesn’t make them the kindest character anyone has ever seen. They did too many bad things to be considered the kindest and I’m not gonna follow the “they went insane” excuse because I really don’t care. All characters are insane and broken but not all of them did as much shit as they did.
I’m not justifying anything from that dick but e.g. when Karlheinz commits a genocide to make ghouls, he is said to have abused his powers and is evil but when Yui commits a genocide because her cute Ayato-kun 〜 died and kills all living things on both worlds, that’s seen as romantic? Like that’s extremely evil and selfish of her too. Or when others complain about the vampires being possessive and jealous, when Yui is the same person that stabbed Shu and threw him in the dungeon afterwards out of jealousy and she also paralysed Ayato then used him as her pleasure slave only because he drank blood from other chicks. Again, I’m not excusing them but she’s just as worse when triggered enough. All the fanwars are stupid when the game only has characters that wouldn’t be perceived as mentally sane or innocent angels in real life.
// Uuh… you kinda worded it a bit too harshly but I do get where you come from.
The thing is Yui, Ayato, Azusa, Subaru and Yuma are characters described by Rejet as either pure or kind-hearted, yet this doesn’t mean they necessarily have to be saints sent from above 24/7. Good people can react horribly under stress, pressure or shock. Yes, they can do wrong stuff and treat others badly as a result, but this doesn’t mean they have a bad soul. Trauma is not the same from person to person and everyone reacts to it differently. It can turn good people into monsters depending on the severity of the circumstances and some might never come back to their original nature. And, even if they do, this will not excuse their actions, but as long as they try to change for the better and take accountability, I believe they deserve a second chance.
Rejet makes Yui go mad in some endings and After stories to demonstrate that she is capable of doing something as awful as the Diaboys if an event hits her hard enough, just like it did to them. And, to be honest, that's realistic. Of course, not the story, but the fact that every person, no matter how strong, has a breaking point.
Speaking of the genocide committed by Yui, the reason why it’s considered romantic is not the deed itself, but the fact Yui created an Ayato ghoul after exterminating everything, only because she wanted to be killed by the man she loved. I think this was the only time Yui seriously used her brain, and the fact she was crazy when doing that, makes it hilarious.
As for the Yandere endings, Yui does that to Shu in MB, if I recall correctly but it was so unexpected because she really didn’t get any vibes throughout the route, therefore I guess it was just random writing. In Ayato’s route, the obsessive tendencies were obvious when she started looking through Ayato’s swimsuit magazines and tried measuring her boobs to the ones of those girls. I was pretty sure she would pull a possessive move on him later on, lol.
Truth be told, I don't mind that in fictional couples as long as they're both obsessed with each other and it's not one-sided. Besides, it’s funny how even Ruki called Yui “Ayato obsessed” in CL.
As a DL fan, I understand that no character is a total green flag because they all display toxic behavior in regular circumstances, no matter if intentional or not. Nonetheless, that shouldn’t stop us from loving them. Some people prefer the softer aspects of DL, while others prefer the darker, but keep in mind that those who prefer talking well about their favs don't want to be always reminded of all the bad things they did, especially if those characters regret them or weren't in the best mental state at the time.
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I really REALLY hate those kinds of stupid “hot take” posts. I think they’re just garbage to purposely farm more discourse to cause infighting, but I’ve been holding this in for so long and I need to get it out of my system so here it goes.
Alastor fans are allowed to dislike Valentino. Valentino was made to be a dislikable Villain while Alastor BY VIV’S OWN WORDS is a chaotic neutral antihero based off of Dexter with a moral code. Of course people are gonna like Alastor more than Valentino. The antihero/vigilante is a very popular beloved trope. I mean just look at Magneto and Venom.
You guys claim to want more nuanced characters but when we try and tell you that Alastor is more nuanced BASED OFF OF EVIDENCE FROM THE CREATOR and little possible context clues in the show we get accused of “babying/woobifying him”(as if Val fans haven’t done that to Val). This isn’t a hit piece against all Val fans/simps btw. I may hate that moth, but you guys should be allowed like him without receiving hate and or death threats.
It’s not “hypocrisy” to dislike Valentino or the Vees and like Alastor for the reasons I said above and the four of them aren’t comparable. Yeah they share some traits but overall the only thing Alastor and the Vees have in common are the mistreatment of the souls they own. Like I said, Val fans shouldn’t be attacked for liking him but the thing is…if you’re gonna preach those words then do the same for Alastor fans/simps because we get attacked too.
(Again it’s not all Val stans but it sure it a lot of them. I’ve all so seen Val haters do it too.) Yall claim not to harass people over fictional characters yet will go under Alastor posts and or discussion threads and be like “Uhm actually him and Valentino are the same🤓☝️”.
“He’s worse than Val” “Why can’t we just have a good villain” “Just accept that Alastor is a villain stop babying him” when we’re just minding our own business. Not to mention people going under fanart of Angel! Alastor and being like “erm actually he’d never go to heaven🤪”.
Along with yall bullying the hell out of Alastor selfshippers/simps and using tumblr sexyman as an insult(which reaks of internalized misogyny btw because majority of Alastor simps are women + women are always the first to be made fun of when it comes to characters that Classify as tumblr sexymen being found attractive by them or any character you personally wouldn’t find attractive.)
And yall going around and keep calling Alastor ugly under posts about people gushing about him and i don’t mean lighthearted jokes either because i make fun of the back of his head sometimes too. And full blown harassment. When an Alastor fan provided evidence of Alastor being a more nuanced character which were clips from Viv’s streams, people in the comments and qrts were being extremely rude and dismissive. It got so bad that op deleted the og tweet.
Don’t go around and claim to be against cringe culture but then make fun of people for finding Alastor attractive. And for goodness sake STOP FUCKING CALLING HIM A SLAVE OWNER. And yes he owns souls but that doesn’t matter.
Alastor is canonically half black and its overall disgusting to slap the label “slave owner” onto him knowing damn well that he grew up in the Jim Crow era of America in the Deep South of Louisiana. His existence as a mixed black person back then was basically considered an abomination. With how terrible it was for black people back then, Alastor probably bore witness to a lot of messed up shit growing up and if that’s the case then it’s no wonder he’s so messed up in the head.
This type of behavior has been going on since the days where we only had the pilot and it’s only gotten worse since the show came out. As soon as I saw that scene with husk and Alastor in hell’s greatest dad I automatically knew what was coming. I’m not saying that Alastor Is a good person nor am I saying that what he did to husk was ok. But to go after/make fun of Alastor fans,purposely denying evidence of his character while in the same breath preach against bullying people over liking certain characters makes YOU the hypocrites. So much for anti-harassment. I’m tired. Bye.
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merakiui · 8 months
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VNSJSCJSKKGKSKWKF PUNK JADE????? as a jade stan i am CLAWING my walls istg
so we have himbo jock virgin floyd,, WE HAVE TO ELABORATE ON PUNK JADE CUZ THE THOUGHT OF HIM JUST MAKES MY WORLD SHAKE
seriously still kicking my legs at that tag omg the thought of punk jade fkkfjsjjc like those stereotypical wattpad bad boys but somehow he's a little more charming and... tolerable (to an extent), i guess...
he leans on lockers, probably rides a motorcycle his rich ass mafia father gifted him, and is definitely brooding and mysterious, but oh my god is it so attractive... you don't mind and it's as if you were put into a spell; especially after you realize you're tangled up in the sheets of his bed, your mind hazy and memories hardly legible <3 you realize he's just as bad as his brother but then again, he's soooo much better in bed, you don't mind in the slightest anymore !!! <33333
fjsjjfjdkrjv i'm just spilling my brain worms now jade has affected me once again
— (a new-ish follower named star hehe <3)
orz punk Jade is so fine omg,,,,,, he has so many piercings, a few very intricate tattoos here and there, and in my heart he kills it on the electric guitar. <3 he rizzes you up with just a few chords and you know his fingers do more than skillfully play chords. Omg omg and he has a split tongue!!!!!!! He always wears his hair in messy styles, uses hair gel to keep it spiky when he wants it to be, and maybe he smokes on occasion; perhaps even coerces you into smoking. >:) getting high with him is an experience omg,,,,,,, maybe you hotboxed with him in Floyd's van once and the two of you kissed a few times and you learned that he's so good at kissing???? So much better than Floyd, and you have to wonder how he's leagues better when Floyd's so social, loved (and feared) by all, popular enough to be with anyone he wants. Jade's just so alluring in a way that his twin isn't. Whereas Floyd's all broad shoulders and bulk and muscle, Jade's all lean muscle and willowy and agile.
You don't trust him to take you for an innocent ride on his motorcycle, so Jade suggests using Floyd's van for stuff. Floyd doesn't really care because he's so busy with sports; his van is already messy enough (he draws the line at cum stains, though. At least, cum stains that don't belong to Floyd himself lol). It's a little unfair that Jade's really good at sex because you want to experience all of this technique with Floyd (who has yet to make you cum with his dick, mind you). Jade just knows what tips you over the edge. He wrings orgasms out of you like he's trying to prove something, and maybe he is. You never really paid much mind to him because he was the "quiet twin," the one who, despite his notable fashion and style, didn't really draw your eye.
Jade just loves showing up in your life when you're trying to avoid him and his bad influence. He teases you about that all the time, playfully calls you good girl/boy/goody-goody when you insist you're only visiting his apartment to see Floyd. He has the stickiest, sleaziest smile on his face when he lets you in, speaking in that mocking drawl of his, "You know Floyd has practice at this time, right?" And god you want to punch him, kick him in his dick, tear his hair out. But you don't because you can't. Because he's addicting. Because he's good at fucking you and talking to you and being your friend and making sure you're safe and sound when you have a bad trip and asking if it feels good when he lays you down in Floyd's van and ruts into you like he has all the time in the world. You hate him, but then you don't because he's so much better than Floyd. And of course you still like Floyd, but he doesn't hit in the way Jade does.
You wake up in his bed more times than you can count, twisted up in the sheets or, more recently, in his arms, and Jade has such a fun time teasing you for it. But then he's so tender in the mornings, so soft and gentle, caressing your cheek or pressing kisses over the marks he left the night prior. The two of you are way more than friends, but neither of you say anything to make it official and so you're stuck in a situationship that feels so comfortable and enjoyable.
Omg and when he plays the guitar for you....... orz Jade is the worst thing to ever happen to you (or so you adamantly claim), but he's also the best because if it weren't for him you'd never form such a genuine connection with him. <3 also, he opened your third eye. You shouldn't settle for bad, sloppy sex with his brother when he can fuck you six ways from Sunday and leave you satisfied each time. He takes immense pride in this, too. Annoying, but you love him. You really, truly, honestly do.
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bengiyo · 4 months
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I Became the Main Role of a BL Drama Ep 3 (Finale) Stray Thoughts
Last time, Akafuji recognized that he has a crush on Aoyanagi for real, and Aoyanagi also recognized there may be something going on with him. The two lonely boys are trying to put on their best faces for the sake of the drama, but Akafuji is crushed by his own attraction, and Aoyanagi by his own doubts in himself as an actor. Aoyanagi rescued Kuromiya from an aggressive can, and we learned he's afraid of aggressive women. Kuromiya intervened, and Akafuji took Aoyanagi on a date. The two of them practiced kissing, but it was sad as fuck, and then the network cut the kiss from their show.
This curry looks pretty good.
Oh yes. Thank you voiceover for confirming they're both thinking about the kiss.
I'm glad Akafuji can still benefit from his stan knowledge, but now he's spiraling.
Welcome back, baby is a messy eater.
It definitely feels like they're having more fun separating themselves from the characters.
I will love Akafuji forever. He responded to being dumped for loving his hobby by loving it harder.
I would also stan Aoyanagi if he took me so seriously and then praised me for loving my stories.
I love when one confesses when they think the other is sleeping.
Aoyanagi has the best eyes of the year OMG.
I like the manager listening in to check on his charge.
Ope. Tendo-san called it falling in love.
I love the shot of the manager stepping over Hajime in the front as it's implied he's putting himself between Hajime and Akafuji.
Oh no. My boy is gonna be alone on his birthday again.
Oh, of course it was intended as a surprise party. I love Akafuji.
Aoyanagi is crying. I'm crying.
THE CARD IS EDIBLE.
Welcome back, The Heart Knows!
They cut a kiss from a friends to lovers BL with this much sexual tension?? Come on.
I'm glad the rest of the crew knows that Aoyanagi is a good actor who usually hits his marks.
They really had that boy spit on the 4th wall. Holy shit.
Fucking paparazzi holy shit.
Oh, I hate misunderstandings like this, but I get it.
Tendo-san, please fix this!
OH MY GOD. I'VE HAD TO GIVE FOR SO LONG AND I FINALLY GET TO RECEIVE. I had hoped the managers would be real and I was not expecting this!
Run, baby boy, RUN!!!
Holy shit, this indeed a stan's apartment.
He has the cutout!!
This is a completely acceptable stan reaction, and also a fantastic shot.
"I like you as myself" will never get old.
"I'm sorry for going on about myself. Anyway, what did you want to talk about?" Sorry to all other BL characters, but we have a new king.
I love this confession.
They planned to remove a kiss that was in the manga??? EVIL.
Aw, this was so close to perfect, but then they chickened out on a real kiss.
Final Verdict: 9.5, This Show Will Drown You in BL Goodness. If they had kissed properly, this would have a 10 and the new standard for all comedy BL follow. Instead, I will say that this show executes comedy with meta commentary about BL better than any other attempt before it (excepting A Man Who Defies the World of BL). Despite confirming the managers, the show chickened out on the mains and I will be docking it for that. Still, this show was excellently paced and will be my new default reaction image whenever someone insists that a Thai BL should be 12 episodes of meandering nonsense with no fucking idea where it's going or what story it's telling. This show executed a great arc in three movements. Everyone else, have several seats.
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tycarstairs · 3 months
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ok i need to talk about alastair for a (long) moment bc i love him.
this got a lot longer than i expected it to btw so ig it’s just for the alastair stans bc it’s basically just a character study lmao
first of all, there’s obviously this:
“I wanted you to have a childhood, a thing I never had. I wanted you to be able to love and respect your father as I never could. Every time he made a mess, who do you think had to clean it up? Who told you Father was ill or sleeping when he was drunk? Who went out and fetched him when he passed out in a gin palace and smuggled him in through the back door? Who learned at ten years old to refill the brandy bottles with water each morning so no one would notice the levels had sunk—?”
like he put so much energy into making sure cordelia could grow up loving and adoring her father in a way he was never able to. from age ten he was hiding his father’s alcoholism, even before he started at the academy.
“Alastair never acknowledging any of it, laughing it off, turning her attention in some other direction, always, so she did not dwell. So she would not have to.”
and then he got to the academy and had bullying and beatings added on top of all that.
“They … let’s just say that by the end of the first week, I had been made to understand my place in the hierarchy, and I had the bruises to remind me should I ever forget.”
like… does this excuse bullying? no, it doesn’t, but it does explain it, especially after he had taken all that for a year:
“After about a year of being knocked around,” Alastair went on, “I realized I could either become one of the bullies, or suffer for the rest of my school days.”
and as he says himself no, he didn’t beat anyone, didn’t get his hands bloody, but yes, he was a bully to save himself from the beatings.
and again, this does not excuse the bullying because of course that’s still bad. i just feel like a lot of people really fucking underestimate how much growing up with an alcoholic parent can affect you. especially when 1) you actually know about it, and 2) you’re the one who has to deal with it from age ten, and 3) they verbally attack you when they’re drunk (as we also saw when elias talked to james)
and then we get to this:
“Then you lot arrived, a bunch of boys from famous families, too well brought up to understand at first what went on far from home. Expecting the world would embrace you. That you would be treated well. As I never had been.” Alastair pushed back a lock of hair with a shaking hand. “I suppose I hated you because you were happy. Because you had each other—friends you could like and admire—and I had nothing like that. You had parents who loved each other.”
and does this excuse the way he treated them? again, no. but once again, it does explain it. alastair had dealt with so damn much since he was a kid so of course he’s gonna feel jealousy. alastair isn’t white, he’s never been able to go anywhere and expected that the world would embrace him as he put it, so that’s yet another thing he was more than likely jealous about.
and he knows what he did was wrong. he knows there’s no excuse, he knows they would all be well within their right to hate him for the rest of their lives if they wanted to, and i feel like so many people forget that?? alastair never expected to be forgiven for any of this.
and then we get to his sexuality and charles.
if i did the math right, alastair would’ve been either 16 or freshly 17 when he started dating a 23-year-old charles and to quote cc:
“it was a bad and unhealthy relationship, and i think the age gap is part of that.”
anyway, there’s one quote i’ve had in my mind ever since chog, and it’s when alastair asks charles, “If this is not what you came for, then why are you here?”
this implies that charles is only ever there for one thing. like, alastair is in love with this man and he wants to show that but charles isn’t letting him.
not to mention that charles is also dismissing alastair’s wishes:
“And I thought that you would agree to marry too.”
“That I would marry?” Alastair sprang to his feet. “I have told you over and over, Charles, even if I did not have you, I would never marry some poor woman and deceive her as to my love and regard.”
alastair having to tell charles over and over again that he’s not marrying a woman and charles still assuming that he will like… sir 🤨 he said no 🤨
anyway. then there’s to how he felt about his sexuality:
“Father’s weakness is not your weakness.”
The fire in the grate had nearly burned down. Alastair’s eyes were luminous in the dark. “I have my own weaknesses, as you well know.”
and after this when cordelia tells him that love isn’t a weakness, he responds with “isn’t it?”
like this man is comparing his own sexuality to the way his father treated him. you cannot tell me he was always okay with being gay because he so clearly was not, especially not with charles trying to keep him hidden and trying to make him marry a woman.
and after elias dies:
“I can’t mourn,” he said in a choked voice. “I cannot mourn my own father. What does that say about me?”
his relationship with his father was so ruined to the point where he couldn’t mourn him because he wasn’t able to love him in the way cordelia was, likely because he mourned his father already when he was 10.
and there’s also some of cordelia’s observations in choi:
Some months ago Cordelia had learned the emotional cost of Alastair’s interventions, the invisible scars he worked so diligently to conceal.”
the emotional costs being this:
“She knew Alastair was not always like this—she knew he could be kind, sweet, vulnerable even. She knew her father had broken his son’s heart a dozen different ways, and Alastair was doing the best he could with the pieces.”
like. elias has been breaking alastair’s heart over and over basically in every possible way since he was at least 10 so he’s really just doing what he can to stitch himself together at this point, the exact reason he put up walls.
“But it didn’t help for Alastair to behave like this, to retreat behind a cold facade as cutting as glass.
The way James retreated behind the Mask.”
alastair is basically just one big defense mechanism.
we also have thomas’ observations about alastair:
“There was only one other person Thomas had known with eyes like that. Not golden eyes, but dark, and so sad—he had always been drawn to that dichotomy, he thought, of the cruelty of Alastair’s words, and the sadness with which he said them. Sorrowful eyes and a vicious tongue. Tell me, he had always wanted to say, what broke your heart, and let such bitterness spill out?”
the answer to his question: elias.
elias broke alastair’s heart and left him to respond to everything with defense mechanisms.
alastair is such a complex character and he’s also one of my absolute favorites because of that. his relationship with his father is so realistic, and him distancing himself from everyone else because of his father is also so realistic. i just love this character with my whole heart ok
this is so long but istg i could write a whole essay about this man and ykw? maybe i will.
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lost-walmartbag · 6 months
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hiii!! do u have a potential post/finish date for first impressions pt4? ive been rereading the parts like every other day i cant get enough of ur writing omg.
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Warning: Swearing
Background: After dinner, Liane suggests you and Eric go out for the night.
Status: Ongoing
Previous part
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'Night out'
Dinner was tense, to say the least. Liane would either not speak or ask only Eric questions. She wouldn't even eat the potato salad you made and looked offended when Eric seemed to love it.
"Honestly babe this is great." He said with a soft smile.
You gave a simple nod feeling the cold glare Liane was shooting your way. Her food was honestly amazing but so filling and kinda greasy. You felt like if you ate more than the small portion you served yourself you'd gain half your body weight overnight.
"Your cooking is so good Ms. Cartman." You said trying your best to salvage the night, and foolishly hoping with that one comment she's immediately love you.
She gave a forced smile and nodded before turning back to Eric. "So honey you look like you lost a lot of weight are you eating alright?"
She was right, of course. Eric had lost a bit of weight since you first met him, it wasn't too much but it was noticeable. You've seen a picture of him as a kid and he was always chubby, but now he gained some muscle, and honestly? He looked amazing.
"Oh. Yeah, I'm eating ok. Y/N never really stops cooking." He said with a chuckle, seemingly not as nervous anymore. "And we go to the gym sometimes so yeah I guess I have."
Liane took in a sharp breath, her nostrils flared and her grip on her glass tightened. "Well isn't that wonderful? Seems like you changed a lot since you left me."
This made Eric gain all that nervous energy back. And you can see why. She said it like it was meant to harm him. Like her words were a knife and she was aiming for his stomach.
"Yeah, I guess so.." He said shifting in his seat.
"You haven't called since you left." Another stab. "Was starting to think you forgot about me."
She put her fork and knife down and gave a small smile. It was insincere, angry. But you weren't sure if Eric saw that. "So I'm glad you came.
"Y-Y/N wanted to meet you so I thought so yeah know...thought it was a good idea." He said looking at Liane but avoiding her eyes.
"Oh. Well, I guess I have you to thank, Y/N." She said darting her cold eyes to you, and you can tell it killed her a bit inside to say that. She turned back to Eric and gave a sickly sweet smile. "You two staying long?"
"Maybe just the night," Eric said, biting his lip.
"That just won't do!" She said with a shocked expression. Don't you want to see your friends again?" Liane said gathering the empty plates on the table. "In fact, why don't you go out tonight? I'm sure the boys would love to see you."
You got a sinking feeling in your stomach at her suggestion. God, if she hated you, how would his friends react?
"I-I don't know...I mean are they even still in town? I'm sure they're busy." Eric said trying to figure out how to say no without the words coming out of his mouth.
"I insist! Most of them are still in town. Stan visits every now and then. Kyle and Kenny work at the school. In fact, I bet they're all at the bar downtown as we speak." Liane said before turning to you and dropping her 'motherly' voice. "Y/N wouldn't mind going. Would you?"
You hated how much this woman scared you. "N-nope! Don't mind at all! L-let's go I'd love to meet everyone." You said, giving an unconvincing laugh.
Eric bounced his leg and nodded. "Okay...yeah let's go."
You and Eric stood up and speed walked out the door. Once you two were in the car you both let out a sigh of relief.
"I told you this was a bad idea." Eric said starting the car.
"Yeah well it would have helped if you told me she was fucking crazy!" You said running your hands down your face. "I feel like I aged twenty years. I started worrying about my morgage in there."
"Why do you think I never wanted you to meet her?"
"I don't know! I thought you were like planning to break up with me soon or something!" You said as he drove.
He slammed down on the break petal and turned to look at you. "Y/N are you kidding?" He said, clearly offended. "Y/N you are the only person in my life that I turn back to. I left everything here because I couldn't fucking stand it."
You felt your cheeks heat up as Eric looked at you with his blue and brown eyes. He cupped your cheeks and pressed his lips into a line. "I can stand you. You are the only person I never get tired of."
"You are the only thing that makes sense." He continues. "My mom says she loves me but doesn't want me to be happy. My friends fucking hate me but still keep me around. Y/N you mean everything you say. When you say you love me I don't even fucking question it. God you're so-"
He cut himself off and let out a small frustrated growl. He grabbed your cheeks and pressed his lips into yours. You melted into his touch and kissed back. One of his hands moved to the back of your head, his fingers tangling in your hair, gently tugging. You gasp softly and he takes the chance to slide his tongue into your mouth.
The kiss quickly heated up. Your hands move down to his arms trying to keep yourself grounded, feeling that if you let go you'd float away. Before you two could get enough there was a honk behind the car, reminding you both that you were parked in the middle of the road. Eric let out a frustrated growl and reluctantly pulled away from your lips.
"Asshole could just move around." He muttered as he continued driving.
You let out a small laugh and leaned your head against the window. You felt less nervous about the rest of the night but you couldn't get rid of that nagging feeling in your stomach. What would his friends be like? Why would Liane make you and Eric leave if she didn't want you around? What was she playing at?
"What are your friends like?" You asked softly.
"I wouldn't really call them friends." He said looking ahead at the semi-empty road. "I liked hanging around Kenny, he was pretty cool. Stan was fine but he was more Kyle's friend than me or Kenny's. And Kyle....Kyle and I didn't really like each other."
You look over at him wondering if you should ask what you're about to. "Why not?"
"It's a long story...not ready to talk about all that yet." He said with a sigh.
"Remember last time you weren't ready to talk about something?" You asked half-teasingly. "Had to have a weird dinner with your mom who clearly hates me."
"I know but I just...It'll take me some time so be patient yeah?" He said parking in front of a small bar.
"Yeah okay." You said with a sigh. "Now let's go meet your....childhood acquaintances?"
Eric grimaced and chuckled. "Maybe calling them friends is better."
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A/N: You guys can make me do literally anything you ask. I love seeing you guys enjoy my writing. But part 5 won't come for a bit, gotta give attention to my other stories. And I don't have a set schedule I just post when I post, but yeah if you guys love my writing and ever want an update on the next part just comment so it's a bit easier to give more updates. And if you don't wanna miss a part ask to be added to the taglist and I'll add you. I literally will not reject anyone who asks. a million people can ask and I will tag all of them. But yeah thank you sm for reading. Love ya'll bye bye.
Taglist: @jessiegerl @stephs-inluv @breadandbutter33
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ratfuzz · 8 months
Text
✫stan, eric and kenny with kitchen witch reader headcanons✫
a/n: kyle one!! finally got to other boys. there's a liiittle bit of suggestive theme and drug joke in kenny one. characters are aged up, reader is gender neutral
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stan marsh
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doesn't really care about you being a kitchen witch, be who you want to be, believe in what you want to believe
making him special coffee/tea every morning
he started to hate waking up early a bit less (or maybe it's just you being by his side)
he's a kisser, he's a hugger, so expect at least one kiss on a cheek while you cook (will not hug you when you do this without consent tho)
s o u p
make him soup
or make soup with him together, that's nice too
with something silly like veggies in shape of something or just chicken and star soup
you two sometimes fight about who's making breakfast today, but you know, this is not serious of course (either way you win even if he's the one cooking it for the most part)
helps you carve or burn sigils in spoons and things
i'd say he needs the same thing as kyle, something with anti-anxiety spell, but also something that generally will help him with sleep
eric cartman
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you probably picked him up by making something with a love spell (it would be funnier if it was blood love spell with espresso, but it would work better with a cake)
lmao, you didn't even have to put a spell on it, he's probably hooked just by your cooking
if you tell him about the fact that you're a witch he'd act like this all is total bullshit, but then ask if you can make something poisonous (of course you can, but it doesn't have to do anything with you been a kitchen witch) or with a curse ((don't fucking do it, though he loves you, it doesn't mean he will not turn you in to cops if something goes wrong i didn't tell you this))
prefers your pastry, but basically loves everything you make
likes looking at you while you cook (will not help you)
even more curious about sigils than kyle
but in the way that he doesn't really trust you (don't blame him, there's a lot of reasons for him to not trust people)
making sigils with eric, so he knows for sure meaning of them
tbh he's really impatient when it comes to you cooking, he doesn't understand why you prefer to take your time with cooking even if you can make it faster and doesn't listen when you explain
at least it looks like it
can bring up something you said later and it kind of surprises you
tries to be less bitchy with you later on
definitely asks you to make something for him with specific sigil for it
kenny mccormick
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if you will not make him kfc wings recreation, i will haunt you in your dreams
doesn't really have a preference in your cooking
kenny is most likely the only one of main 4 to remember everything you say about witchery (he's just generally a good listener i think)
would make some type of sigil for shits and giggles (maybe literally)
love spells with emphasis on better sex life aren't needed, lol, but he would totally ask you for this as part of roleplay
ate all your donuts with sugar powder and tried to get away with it by saying that powder on his clothes is cocaine
if you cook together, he will always be distracted by your beauty, sometimes it's better to just let him sit in the kitchen with you
really likes how aprons look on you
so yeah another reason to wear them
any kind spell will do, boy needs more nice things in his life
making forever weed brownies together <3
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a/n: honestly, i thought i will never write anything for kenny. wow. cool. we'll see, maybe i will make one with girls or butters/marjorine idkidk
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skylarbee · 7 months
Note
I just saw your recent post on AM stans hating on Milex stans… I need a catching up please. What about LV and Amanda (?) and Matt too? I rarely ever dive deep into bands and their members, I just like to appreciate their music.
Thank you ♡
! long post incoming and i want to point out that i don't plan on using this blog to discuss any of these people (only maybe very rarely) - i don't like them, i don't think they're good people, i don't want to argue with people who think otherwise, and i usually ignore whatever they're up to - my main focus will always be on milex/miles !
hi anon! <3 i have no idea how much you know already, or if you basically don't know anything related to these three, or any of them. i will say that i have no screenshots concerning the things that i mention, but searching their names up on tumblr and/or scrolling through blogs like @/shit-talk-turner and @/alexstorm will make things more clear.
this whole thing started when louise posted a screenshot yesterday of an am fan saying some dumb shit about her in the comments and bringing up alexa (i still can't believe she posted this). she posted this with some equally stupid words (i don't have the screenshot - you can find it on twitter/tumblr/ig/tiktok/wherever), and matt then reposted her story, jumping to protect her (maybe amanda did too, i don't know). then she managed to screenshot some nice comments and posted those too, saying that 'love always wins' or something similar, and that haters can kiss her ass (this definitely didn't come across as her craving and asking for some compliments; she definitely doesn't need people babying her in order for her to feel good about herself) - which reminded me of something similar that amanda said like a year ago, that they don't pay attention to the haters anyways, of course after posting a long paragraph paying attention to them (makes me laugh just to think about it).
there are so many other hysterical and foolish things she does, like posting pictures of a messy bed (look, i'm fucking alex turner!), selfies with suspicious rings, other pics hinting at alex's presence, calling paparazzis to take pictures of them on the beach, pretending to be jane birkin and alex to be serge gainsbourg, going off about how independent she is while living off of alex's money, somehow managing to make matt's and amanda's marriage about her (with amanda encouraging her), 'accidentally' always doing these when miles has important things going on, etc etc (the fact that her and miles never interacted in real life is also deeply concerning. alex, dear, you should always trust your best friend when they don't like your partner, they always end up being right - especially knowing that miles was always on really good terms with alex's exs). it's clear that she's deeply insecure and adores when the attention is on her and when people are talking about her, and if she goes for a long period without this, she just has to pull something that will get fans talking. she's trying so hard to fit in and be the sexy rockstar girlfriend that she just ends up looking stupid.
if you don't know the real reasons why some people don't like louise, i'm just gonna post some links about her that pretty much sum it all up:
https://www.tumblr.com/snarcticmonkeys/685972106927882240/can-you-recap-the-problematic-things-frencies?source=share
https://www.tumblr.com/snarcticmonkeys/685366553489866753/everybodys-got-something-to-hide-except-me-and-my?source=share
https://www.tumblr.com/snarcticmonkeys/685366736118235136/everybodys-got-something-to-hide-except-me-and-my?source=share
https://www.tumblr.com/snarcticmonkeys/685155230049075200/louise-the-fangirl?source=share
https://www.tumblr.com/snarcticmonkeys/685155226833059841/lyon-july-2018?source=share
https://www.tumblr.com/snarcticmonkeys/685095240693170176/deleted-posts?source=share
about amanda... now, if i remember correctly, amanda had a blog dedicated to her music, and people dug up some screenshots in which she replies to someone and uses the n-word, and then another post where she's being racist. these screenshots are somewhere in the depths of my phone and it would be impossible to find them, and regardless, these screenshots are so old that she could've well changed for the better since then.
the problem with her is the fact that she's having arguments in the comments with young fans (asking stuff like did they have brain tumours for breakfast and other ridiculous things...or was that louise?) and posts even more ridiculous stories in response to people bullying louise, and protecting her like she's a toddler who can't take care of herself. the pure arrogance and self-importance with which she communicates her ideas is just mental, she thinks that she's on the top of the world, and encourages louise to act the same way. it's baffling that two 40-ish women think that bullying 14 year olds will achieve anything other than encouraging other 'fans' to act the same way.
the thing about matt is just basically the fact that ever since he's been with amanda, he acts the same way as her. now, i know there's been some issue about some idiots commenting about his daughter, which made him deactivate his ig account, and i have absolutely no words for the people who dared to say anything about that poor, innocent, completely blameless child. but even before this, he turned to the same kind of arrogance as amanda and reposted all her stories concering louise. the way that they need to say over and over again what a good person louise is, how much alex loves her, how great their relationship is, how beautiful and kind and caring she is... makes you really question if she really is indeed all those things (especially if you opened those links i posted). more importantly, what exactly do they plan to achieve arguing with teenage girls? it's so childish, my god, they are only adding fuel to the fire. god knows what they're telling alex and also god knows what he thinks about it all.
there's something that i'm not 100% sure about, but i'm gonna say it in the hopes that someone will see this and will tell me if this is wrong or not: matt cheated on breana when both her parents died (this one is definitely true), and left her with 1 year old amelia, and fucked off to live with another woman (amanda denies being the woman in question, i have no idea). she was solo parenting for a while (breana said all these in a podcast), then matt woke up and decided that he wants something to do with his daughter after all, and ever since then he takes care of her too - good job love, you're still horrible though.
in short, l&a's insanely childish antics dragged matt into the whole thing too. they're constantly throwing hissy fits, in hopes to achieve god knows what, and then they feel proud of themselves for telling teenage girls off. which makes you think, what would happen if am would be 10 times more popular than they are know, and louise would get 10 times the hate she gets now? or even better, what would happen if louise would get the same amount of hate miles gets on the daily? she said in her screenshot that she knows that it's only a minority of the fandom that leave such mean comments - then what's the point of paying attention to it? all this just shows another reason why these two definitely don't like each other - miles has brains, the other one... well, i'm sorry. i tried my best to like them and look past their mistakes,but i just can't do it.
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noirvette · 11 months
Text
WE NEVER EXISTED
[band smau]
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[TWENTY]
masterlist.
prev. | next.
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"Jesus, what happened to you?" Stan asks, staring at the bandaid covering Kyle's cheek.
Kyle scratches the top of his head, "Kenny."
"Damn he got you good, personally I wouldn't let something like that slide, but.. you know to each their own." Clyde teased.
Kyle stares at Clyde blankly and he just shrugs.
"Anyways.. are you two good? Like Kenny being here is.. obviously less than ideal, how are you guys holding up?" Nichole questioned.
You shrug, "I'm.. personally okay, Kyle took care of it for me.. obviously," You gesture towards his face, "I don't think Kenny'll bother me for a while, if he does.. I'll call you guys."
Stan frowns, "Doesn't Kenny have keys to your apartment?"
You slap your hand against your forehead, "Fuck, dude you're right."
Nichole puts a hand on your shoulder reassuringly, "You can stay with me for the next while as you get those locks changed."
You smile at her, "Thanks Nicky, you're the best."
"Of course!"
Clyde makes a sudden noise of excitement. "We got your gifts Y/n! Here!" He exclaims, handing you the bag he was holding and you take it.
"Thanks Clyde, uhmmm.. should I open them now.. or..?"
Stan shakes his head, "It'd actually be better to open them later, we have places to be!"
"Oh you're just a hater, you just don't want to get one upped by Clyde Donovan."
"Uh.. being one upped by you is definitely not my concern, but whatever you say."
"Boys.. your gifts are infinitesimal compared to mine." Nichole boasts.
Stan and Clyde turn to each other before turning to Nichole and bursting out with laughter. You and Kyle even sit giggling at the situation.
"WHAT? What are you guys laughing at?" Nichole shrieks.
"INFINITESIMAL?" Stan exclaims.
Clyde holds his finger up, "Infinitesimal." He says with that nerd voice.
"Oh I hate you BOTH so much and YOU TWO," She turns to point a finger at you and Kyle, "You're just gonna sit there as they laugh and make fun of me?"
You tried suppressing your laugh, "I'm.. I'm sorry Nichole they're kinda right for this. Nobody says words like that."
Kyle nods his head along with what you're saying.
"You all... I hate you all so badly."
You chuckle, holding up Clyde's gift, "I'll open it later how about that Clyde?"
"Mmmhmm, that works, as long as mine's first."
"Of course."
You set Clyde's gift down on your coffee table and Nichole and Stan set theirs beside it. The group starts to head out the door and you and Kyle put your shoes on and follow after, "So.. where we all going today?"
Stan grins, "Bowling."
Clyde whoops and jumps excited, "OH! I'm gonna kick your guys' asses. Get ready!"
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"So.. Clyde what was that about whooping our asses?" Nichole smirks.
The tallied up score sat on the tv screen, Nichole had won with a score of 219, followed up by Stan at 201, Kyle at 183, and you managed to get 172. But Clyde came in last.. with a whopping 155.
"Don't.. I don't wanna hear it, Nichole." Clyde groaned, head in his hands.
Kyle pats Clyde's back, "You win some you lose some bro.. you just happened to lose."
"Oh thanks Kyle that reassures me soooooo much."
Kyle turns to the rest of you with wide eyes, mouthing an 'okay...' and Stan gets up, "That concludes our game.. you guys wanna look at what they got at the arcade part?"
"Absolutely!" Clyde springs up, "Now this.. is where I successfully win."
"Win at what?" You ask.
Clyde turns to you with a glint in his eye, "Everything.. my dear Y/n." and you roll your eyes.
Kyle going off to conclude the game with the workers and everyone else chatters about, following Stan towards the arcade games section of the bowling alley.
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You stand next to Stan, paying your points for a zombie shooter game.
"So..." Stan trails off, "How are you holding up?"
"What do you mean?" You eyebrows furrow, taking a quick glance at Stan as he goes through the level modes.
"Well.. I mean you're bouncing back relatively quickly you know?"
"Is..is that bad?"
Stan sighs, selecting a level, "It depends.. have you managed to fully process everything? Or have you only managed to fully absorb everything happening on a surface level?"
You stood there, shocked. One, the level of maturity coming from Stan was outrageous, nothing against him of course but you never thought he could be so perceptive, good on Wendy. He had a point though.. had you managed to fully process everything? You were doing fine.. you believed.
You weren't as depressed about the situation as you were. You were mainly angry and upset that Kenny had the gall to do that to you, that Red did that to you, but you realized that tears spent on him wasn't going to fix anything. You always had a strict policy of no forgiveness towards cheaters and once a cheater always a cheater, so you really disliked the idea of keeping Kenny on the forethought of your mind, you wouldn't give him that.
"Dude you're gonna die." Stan casually mentioned, dragging you out of your thoughts.
You perk up, immediately getting into kill zombie mode, "Why would you ask this as we play this game."
Stan's face reddens, "Yeah that's not.. my proudest moment, but I couldn't stop myself from asking you."
You headshot a zombie in game, "I appreciate it, I'm doing okay, promise.. I'm hurting a lot less than I think I would.. considering how long Kenny and I were together but.. I have a strict mind policy towards cheaters and that's minimal tears shed for those who cheat."
Stan tilts his head at that with a nod, "Word, that's a good policy to have."
"It's the best."
Stan and you continue to play the level up until the "pay points to continue" pops up, Stan groans, "Oh I hate cash grab games."
You shrug, "The price to pay for games that are actually fun."
Stan puts the toy gun back into the slot and as you do the same he turns to look at you, "You'd come to me.. right? If anything haywire happens? If not me literally anyone? Nichole? Kyle? I'd.. say Clyde but he might not be the best.."
You smile bittersweetly, "Of course Stan. I.. promise. I really do swear that.. if something hits me mentally, I'll come to you, or at least someone."
Stan breathes a sigh of relief, "Good.. Wendy's been dying to ask about you too by the way, she was nervous on reaching out because she wanted to give you enough space to cope through it too. I'll let her know you're good and that you'll.. reach out to her soon?"
You kick your heel into the carpet, "You can do that, I feel bad.. I've kinda left everyone on ghost for a bit."
"Yeah, you really know how to worry people.."
"Sorry.."
"Oh, I didn't mean it like.." Stan cringes at himself, "I am horrible at words, I didn't mean it like that, swear, that sounded awful oh God."
"Stan.. dude it's alright. I... got how you meant it."
Stan just nods and looks around the arcade arena, "Uhm.. you wanna play another game or..?"
You hum, "Yeah, let's play those racing games those are always fun to do right?."
"Oh hell yeah dude, let's go." Stan heads over to the motorcycle racing games, unfortunately for the both of you, Kyle and Clyde were already on it and the other was out of order.
"Sorry guys, you'll have to wait, I'm tryna kick Kyle's ass right now." Clyde shouted, unable to really hear himself due to the fans blowing right into his face.
Nichole, who was watching the two play look at you too, "Clyde's losing again."
"Again? This has got to be worst losing streak I've seen him have." You remarked.
"Mmmhmmm." Nichole hummed in agreement, "Sure is."
You take a look at both their screens, Kyle was way ahead of Clyde by the looks of it and by the look on his face he was determined to win. Clyde looks partly like he was desperate to win and that he was about to fall off the machine and give up.
Their game ends with Kyle winning and Clyde trying to finish with at least beating a few NPC characters, "Kyle, man, how did you get so good at these games?"
"Stan and I used to play these sort of games all the time growing up, arcade games was our thing."
You groan, "Does this mean I'm gonna lose against him?"
Kyle and Stan both chuckle, "Yup! The only person who's better than me at these games is Stan."
"Just my luck."
"Don't worry, Y/n, I'll go easy on ya." Stan winks.
Clyde finishes his lap and sits on the machine in despair, "I can't believe I lost... Nichole go against me in air hockey NOW, I need a win."
"Bitch, what part of you thinks you're gonna win against me in air hockey?" Nichole asks, bewildered.
Clyde hops off the machine, "I don't know but I know."
They walk over towards the air hockey table and you and Stan get on the motorcycle game and Kyle stays back to watch you two play.
"I'll let you choose the map." Stan says, using his points to start a new game.
"Watch me end up picking the hardest map.." You sigh, scrolling over the various maps to play before picking one that looked relatively easy.
The game starts and you both start off somewhat bad, Stan having not realized the game started and you not knowing half the controls.
The game's controls actually wasn't that bad, but trying to go around corners was a lot harder than doing it in Mario Kart, the constant tilt of the fake motorcycle made it difficult to find a proper balance.
You took a glance at Stan, who had a four person lead on you right now and grimaced when you saw how well he was doing.
"Here," Kyle stood behind you, leaning closer to your ear so you could hear him over the fans, "Scooch back a bit and distribute your weight to more where you're sitting rather than leaning too much forward."
You follow his instructions until your back meets his hand, indicating you're sitting where you should be, embarrassment floods your body and he continues helping you out, "Yeah there you go.. see? You want to keep your weight centralized on these things. That's the good thing about these arcade ones, you only have to keep your balance in the middle, rather than worrying about other things."
Stan notices out of the corner of his eye and briefly pauses, nearly ruining his lead on an NPC, "KYLE" he shouts, scaring the both of you, "Are you helping her? Oh my god you two are cheaters!"
Kyle backs away a bit, "Just a little.. she's up against you of all people Stan.. a little help doesn't hurt anybody."
"Just a little she's up against you of all people Stan." Stan mimics with a high pitch voice before clearing his throat and speaking again at his normal pitch, "Don't care, Y/n is doing is fine! Better than Clyde too, he was behind you by seven people, she just passed another NPC! See we have a three person difference now!"
Kyle crosses his arms and waits for the two of you to finish, "Yeah yeah, got it Stan."
The two of you finish your game in the same lineup, Stan first, and you in fourth. "See that was pretty good Y/n!" Stan compliments.
"Thanks," You hop off the machine, "Where'd the other two go again?"
"Air hockey." Kyle replied, checking his watch, "However.... the alley looks as if it's closing soon."
"Huh?" Stan turns to look at Kyle, "How'd you know?"
"It's 9:45 and the worker mentioned something about them closing at 10, we probably have time for like one more game before they close out the arcade."
"Mann... let's go get Clyde and Nichole."
The three of you head towards the intense ongoing game of air hockey, "You're still playing?" You inquire.
"Yup! I paid for 5 more minutes and I'm up four points and I intend on keeping that four point lead." Clyde says, his focus entirely on the game.
Nichole is well focused too, head and eyes following every movement of the puck flying around.
The puck flies towards Clyde's side and he jabs it quickly and it flies sliding into the goal of Nichole's side, "WOOHOOOOOO FIVE POINT LEAD BABY LETS GO!" Clyde punches the air in celebration.
"Oh don't celebrate yet, Donovan. We still got three minutes and I plan on destroying you in those three minutes." Nichole jeered, eyes narrowing on the puck, she hits it as soon as the air is felt against her skin, landing the puck cleanly into the goal of Clyde's side of the table.
"Oh what the hell, Nichole, that was a cheap shot!"
She shrugs, "Still got it in though."
The two continue on as the three of you watch and then soon the buzzer goes off, ending the game, Clyde having won.
"YES YES YES YES YES" Clyde exclaims, jumping around the table, "I DID IT I DID IT I DID IT!"
Nichole rolls her eyes, "We get it.. you did it.."
"You're just mad you lost against me at this."
"Oh shut it Clyde."
"Nuh uhh... you can't make me shut up you're a loserrrrr and winners make the rules."
"???? The hell are you on about?"
"Okayy.. let's go before we get kicked out, I can feel the workers' eyes boring into our skulls." Kyle stammers, ushering the group towards the door, mouthing a 'Sorry, so sorry' to the worker he passes.
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The group stood in front of your apartment door, keeping the conversation going as to prevent you from going inside by yourself.
"You're sure you wanna stay here for the night?" Nichole asks you, worry laced in her tone.
"I'm sure Nichole.. I promise nothing is gonna happen to me tonight."
"What about if we stay the night here? Hm? Can we do that?" Clyde pleads with you.
"You guys don't have any clothes over here! I.. where would you all even fit? My apartment isn't that big you guys."
"Stan and Kyle can cuddle together on the couch, boom done. I can take the floor, boom done. Nichole and you can sleep in your room, boom done." Clyde quickly states.
"Yeah, that would wo- Stan and Kyle do what..?" Stan sputtered eyebrow raised.
Clyde looks over at Stan with a bright smile on his face before turning back to you, "See! Problem solved!"
"What about the clothes..?" You pointed out.
"......If we get our clothes and meet back in less than an hour would you.. agree..?"
"...45 minutes."
The group cheers and run down your apartment hallway, "BE BACK SOON Y/N!!"
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TAGLIST: @captivq @kimiesstuff @bwljules @the-cooler-kira @1one1person1 @kenny-the-ken @neenieweenie @n0tangeliccc @frogindisguise @revzxn @ryenwritess @mirophobic @gonefiishiing @musiclovebot @bootsieboo @bonez4brainz @s0l4riss @1996kj @sweetadonisbutbetter @scinclaitnoir @okarigold
109 notes · View notes
p1-f1 · 9 months
Text
Happy Birthday.
`,°*•~*~-☆
Pairings: Eric Cartman x reader
Pronouns: none. No gender implied
Warnings: swearing. (Rushed, sorry.)
WC: 1.1k
Authors notes: made for @h-harleybaby !! Happy birthday my love!! I love you sosososoo much!! (Yes, I already announced my break, but I love my wife, duck you if you dont.) Everyone with Harley a great birthday!! She deserves it!!
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As you woke up in the morning, you heard that special alarm that reminded you it was your special day. Along with that, when you sat up, a sweet scent coming from the kitchen entered your nose.
Throwing on your best clothing, a cute outfit you had planned out over a few days, you walked to the kitchen, the cold floors sending a shiver down your spine.
There in the kitchen was the love of your life. In all of his adorable, chubby, and assholeness.
"I made you breakfast. Enjoy, bitch."
The brown haired boy sat the plate in front of you, and there were a few pancakes stacked perfectly with sweet white whipped cream on top. Eric may have been rude, but he meant well.
"Thank you, love."
He didn't respond, only kissed your head and sat next to you. I guess your birthday gift was having him watch you eat, because the boy wouldn't take his eyes off of you. (Or, your plate.)
A few minutes later, your head was rested on his shoulder, looking up at him with a sweet smile.
"What? What do you want?"
Eric said, an eyebrow raised.
"You remembered?"
"Yeah, course I would. You're a senior fucking citizen now. Happy one day closer to death."
The chubby boy stood up, walking to the sink with your plate.
"Thank you, bear."
That nickname you gave him always made him melt. (He'd never admit it. He's not a soft bitch in his words.)
"Stop calling me that, stupid."
Eric must have had plans for you on your special day, because once those dishes were done, you were rushed out of your apartment and down the street.
At least he dressed up for you. Or, tried. A nice t-shirt that didn't have a cuss or slur, black pants you swore he only wore for special occasions, and his adorable bracelet you bought with a small bat charm. Much like the plushie you owned.
"Did you make any plans for today?"
He asked, his arm around your shoulder.
"Just you."
The boy nodded, making a turn with you on his side. You weren't sure where you were headed, but you trusted Eric enough.
"My friends wanted to see you, or whatever. I told them to fuck off but Kahl said he already told Kinny to come over at one."
Eric scoffed as you giggled, thinking about that tone of voice he had when talking about his friends, it was like he hadn't changed since fourth grade.
"They did? That's sweet."
"Yeah, whatever, let's just get this over with."
"Okay, honey."
`,°*•~*~-☆
An hour later, you were sitting in Kyle and Stans shared kitchen, sipping on a small glass of soda (Faygo, to be specific.), while your boyfriend was judging you and Stan from the corner.
"I don't understand how you stay with him, Y/N."
"What? Eric? He's amazing! I don't understand how other people wouldn't want him."
The boy chuckled, shaking his head.
"I think that's just you."
"Nuh uh! I'm sure plenty of girls would want him!"
You said defensively, your hand pointing to the boy who was once distracted by Kenny's antics, but was now watching you.
"I'm not so sure about that."
"He-"
"And don't bring up Heidi, N/N."
"Whatever."
You could already feel your boyfriend's glare on the two of you, signaling it was time to get out of there or he'd be in a bad mood the rest of the day.
The cold Colorado air hit you as Eric opened the door, and waved bye to his friends, with you in tow.
"So, because you're like, my partner or whatever, I bought you some gifts. And don't make it a big deal do I'll hate you forever!"
A small giggle escaped your mouth at the thought of him shopping for you, knowing you were one of the only people he'd go into a shop for.
"Yeah? Thanks."
"Stop saying thank you. It's your birthday, goddamnit. You don't owe anyone anything. You're an old person."
"Eric, you're older than me."
"Shut up!"
"Okay, dear."
You couldn't help but giggle a tiny bit more, causing Eric to glare at you and loosen his grip around your waist. Your head found his shoulder, resting it there for the while as the two of you walked.
It's like he almost said something, but decided to save it. Save it for later, maybe? You couldn't help but wonder what it was.
The walk home would've been cold if not for Eric, his body radiating heat like no other with his adorable chubbiness you couldn't get enough of. He was like a teddy bear. Your teddy bear.
He opened the door for you, and shushed you before you could thank him. Giving a "what did I say" look before walking past you to his bedroom.
You quickly followed behind, but he closed the door on you. Pretty much slamming it in your face. Your head tilted, staring at the white door.
"Sorry."
Eric muttered from the other side, muffled from the paint and wood of the door. A minute later, it opened.
You almost teared up. Petals on the ground, leading to a small basket. Inside was a pack of bracelets, some to match, a few bottles of Faygo, a drink you had loved for a good while, and many other things like snacks and candy.
Your silence made him nervous. Eric pushed up his glasses as they were sliding down from him sweating, his cheeks and nose a light pink from embarrassment and worry you wouldn't like the gift he had spent so long on.
"Eric…"
The softness of your voice almost melted him, as his brown eyes met yours. Your face was of pure adoration. He was in love.
"I-"
"Shut up."
Eric knew what you were going to say, and he wanted to say it first. He cleaned up his bed, brushing off a few petals and pulling you down. You fell onto his chest, resting your head on the softness. With his hand on the back of your head, he spoke softly.
"I know I'm a total asshole and all, but uh… "
He hesitated.
"I love you."
If it weren't for the fact he was basically holding you down, you would have jumped up and down while squealing. The first time your boyfriend of five months had said "I love you" and you couldn't get enough of it. Though, you calmed yourself.
"I love you too."
He chuckles, pulling your small body further up him to press a soft peck to your lips.
"Happy birthday, Y/N."
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