#like the Angelus parts

[liam-summers]

I violently reject the entire narrative that Cordelia knew and understood Angel better than anyone else and that Angel knew and understood Cordelia better than anyone else. This is literally not true in any season of either show.

[gu6chan]

the brief mention that 1.3 leonard could still be feeling some deep lingering grief over his brothers' deaths still never fails to fascinate me tbh like, does he think of the standards he must have lost since their passing and feel guilt? or does he see them in every child he abuses??? does he keep his grief to himself or does he find it a useful anecdote to what must be a countless number of families dealing with loss??? does the green dragon know? does he confide in it????? since leonard seems to be aware of what arioch lost to the union, just how aware is/was she in what HE lost???????? did they have a role in each other's loss? is THAT where their beef came from??????? im going to merge into a wall

[oveliagirlhaditright]

Also, apparently Buffy was actually affected by Angelus' "I came to say goodbye. You're the only thing in this dimension I will miss," line, but acted to hide it.

ANGEL There's time enough. I wanted to say goodbye first. You are the one thing in this dimension I will miss.

BUFFY (suppressing emotion) This is a beautiful moment we're having here. Can we just fight, please?

[vampirologist]

this passage from the textbook in my deviance soc class….. I used the concept of the replacement self in my angel essay as I feel like it really elaborates part of the relationship between angel and angelus

[battlekidx2]

I'm making this post purely to shout out some incredibly talented fanfic writers from the Hazbin Hotel fandom and my favorite works of theirs.

Did anyone ask me for this? No. Will I post it anyway? Absolutely. The writers in this fandom are too good.

The first fanfic writer I want to shout out is @prince-liest (ao3 link)

I absolutely love their get cared for idiot (Alastor) series (not the official name but they called it that in one of their asks jokingly so it's now the default in my head).

Knock, Knock! It's Your Worst Fucking Nightmare! (this fic gets it!!!! This is what I meant when I said Alastor is growing a heart and part of him is raging against it. He still has ulterior motives and a massive amount of pride and part of him feels like that growing fondness is getting in the way, but he can't stop it. I need to stop before this becomes a long ramble. I've written a couple thousand words on this idea, but this fic is just a better use of your time than any meta I could ever write and way more entertaining :D )

Happily Ever After, and Other Shit Nepotism Can't Buy

The Last Bus Stop in Hell, Now Boarding (Please look at the tags for content warning. Angel and Alastor body swap story.)

They're amazing at balancing on that razor's edge with Alastor where there's a heart in there (really deep) and he's unintentionally growing attached to the hazbin crew, but he doesn't lose his edge. He's still manipulative and an asshole and can easily be the scariest guy in any room. He's in hell for a reason. A+ characterization at all times.

They're so good at writing the complicated dynamics he has with the residents, especially Charlie, and I enjoy how they expand on Alastor's potential dynamic with Angel Dust.

Anything they write from Lucifer's POV is gold too! My favorites are:

Take Two and Leave a Voicemail!

The Care and Keeping of Homo Angelus

I am also 100% here for their Aro!Alastor agenda and I'm enjoying their fic I Love Her, I Love Her Not so far!

The second person I want to shout out is @grayintogreen (ao3 link)

Their series Red Roses and Dead Things consistently gut punches me.

Just like Princeliest, they are also fantastic at balancing on that razor's edge with Alastor. A+ characterization for everyone and I love how they write HuskerDust. It's so soft, especially in the aftermath fic for Learn that Even Death May Die called If My Love Is Tomorrow, I've Forgotten Yesterday (that fic hurt in the best way).

The way they explore the aftermath of Learn that Even Death May Die is incredibly impactful. They capture the unique grief that comes from the reality that there are some things you won't get closure for so well that it's painful.

I can't say enough good things about their series. Genuinely go read it.

I found @lediz-watches (ao3 link) before the first season of Hazbin Hotel dropped (I've been a fan of the hellaverse for a few years now and have been enthralled with the Hazbin Hotel pilot since I first watched it in 2020) and I really enjoy their fics.

My favorite is Suffering Kindness. I love the Charlie and Alastor dynamic they explore in this story. I think I'm just a sucker for the Charlie and Alastor dynamic in general, but this fic hits all the right notes for me. (written pre-season 1 but man is it good. 100% recommend)

LeDiz also has a lot of one-shots/collections of one-shots that are very fun.

The Cure for Inexorable Boredom

Dollface (one-shots about Alastor theories. My favorite is the 3rd one. So fascinating!)

Choice Words (one of the few explorations of Alastor and Vaggie's dynamic that I've found in the fandom)

Don't Say It

I have to shout out @ckret2 (ao3 link) and their phenomenal fic You’ve Got a Face for Radio. This is such an amazing aroace!Alastor fic. (Embarrassingly it was this fic that made me realize I was most likely aroace myself. I’d had fleeting moments of suspecting it but it wasn’t until I saw my experiences laid out in a character explicitly written to be aroace that I put the puzzle pieces together. -_- some of these passages were too relatable.) I cannot express how much I love this fic.

I also like their fics Dumpster Baby and Bitter Grapes.

I have one last writer I want to mention because this is getting really long (whoops). The last one is tiredoflofteranditsshit and their Assume He Has a Heart series (because my favorite character and how I interpret them was not obvious enough already with the fics/authors I've recommended. I had to make it more obvious).

These fics are massive (17k and 26k words) and so much fun. Definitely worth the read. Yet another series that follows up season 1 and explores Alastor’s growing connections and how he lies to himself and pushes against it. Love this series and there’s a lot to sink your teeth into :D

[writingwithcolor]

Romani character portrayals in fanfiction

Rroma Dick Grayson, batman fanfiction

endoftheworldhere asked:

I wanted to write a fanfiction about what Dick Grayson’s life would have been like if he wasn’t adopted by Batman. It was going to have him dealing with the bad parts of Gotham City and interacting with various criminals and rouges, But I was worried that could come off as stereotypical or racist since he’s been portrayed as at least part Romani and I wanted to include some connections to his heritage as a way he clings his parents after they died so traumatically. Any advice?

The thing about Dick Greyson is that he was retconned into being part Romani, and the writers did so in a very stereotypical way. A lot of Romani people have talked about this, especially on Tumblr, and opinions do vary about how he should be written. Many think it’s best to ignore his “heritage” and just write him as white, while others disagree and think that his heritage is important representation and should be written, but more respectfully.

I honestly don’t know my personal opinion on this, but I will say that there is a huge stereotype about Romani people being criminals. If you do plan to write him as part Romani, make sure to avoid these tropes. Otherwise, I would just nix his Romani heritage.

-Mod Tess

Romani woman, curses and Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Anonymous asked:

I'm struggling a bit with a piece of fan work right now, and I was hoping you could weigh in. In Buffy season two, there's a character named Jenny, who we first meet as a techno-pagan computer science teacher, who helps Buffy and co deal with fighting demons and stuff. Only the thing is, she's Rromani. She's there to make sure a family curse stays on a vampire who killed someone beloved to them a century ago (mostly to protect people from him if Angel/Angelus gets uncursed), which everyone gets mad at her for not telling them when he loses his soul and goes on rampage.  Ordinarily, it's not hard to write her, because until that arc, she's a fun character who happens to be a Rroma woman, and as other characters use magic, that doesn't stand out. But the whole curse thing, and the depiction of her family we're given, (and the way a canon redemption arc for Angelus I can't stand starts with him getting a soul as a punishment for killing a Rroma woman in 1898), and the everyone being mad about deception all just feels like many negative stereotypes.  What would be your thoughts on depicting Jenny, and on what to keep in mind trying to rewrite how she was shown in the show. [Ask redacted for length]

Let me just start out by saying that I am not very familiar with Buffy, so thank you for the context. I think your best bet here would be to drop the curse plot line altogether, as that’s a huge stereotype about Romani people. I think it’s ok to have her do magic, as long as other characters also do, and although I do think the vampire stuff is also a stereotype (a lot of vampire lore is supposedly taken from some Romani folklore, and Romani people are often associated with vampires in pop culture), I think it’s fine given the context of the show.

-Mod Tess

[evieelyzabethh]

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐕𝐨𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐃𝐚𝐦𝐧𝐞𝐝

pairing(s): spike x demon!reader

summary: watching the man you love fawn over someone else is always hard, especially when you know you could love him better.

warnings: angst with a happy ending, later seasons Spike, soft Spike, the reader is a demon so old that no one knows your name and they call you Honey.

Spike was an actor, but William was a poet. This was easy to tell when watching Spike act as if he wasn't in love with Buffy. William would've written her a sonnet, presented her with a rose and some ridiculously expensive necklace. The image of a stone glittering around her neck would've inspired dozens of lines of prose, enough to keep her image alive in those fateful moments when she wasn't there to be looked upon. Spike looked. He watched. He stalked. It was his bad boy persona, the leather jacket hiding the heart that still beat out of his chest. Some things never changed.

This new apocalypse had changed something, though, that and the fact that Buffy had now come back from the dead a second time. You thought it would make her more formidable. A cockroach. Through apocalypse after apocalypse, thick and thin, even death, she was never really gone. Whether she was crawling, suffering, or drowning, she always came back. You liked Buffy, you were friends, or whatever she called the unhumans she hung around who wasn't dating her or one of her friends.

She kept you at an arms width ever since she found you back before her first death. In a bottle or a vase, something old and dusty that tipped over in the library and through smoke you materialized. You didn't remember much; you didn't remember anything. The collection of you took days, like assembling some million and one pieced puzzle. Pieces were lost along the way, Giles bet that somewhere between your brain being assembled and your bones hardening that your memory slipped through the cracks of the old hardwood flooring and was lost to the Hell Mouth beneath. He also said that if the memory was so heavy it sank, it wasn't worth remembering anyways.

This being said, it made since that she wasn't immediately open to letting you in and you were fine with that. You didn't know how to exist otherwise. Feelings were also lost on you, along with your name, and breathing, and speaking. You read a lot, after being placed in Giles' care, you only ever were in the school library or his personal library in his apartment, and being born again, you now had a broken vocabulary of unnatural and old English.

It was Willow who named you Honey. She told you hot tea helped with the healing vocal cords and that honey would hopefully act as a sticky cement so they would stay together. Lots of honey was what you consumed until your presence became synonymous with honey and then that became your name. Remembering to breath came soon after, it made your human company that much more relaxed around you. That and the fact that because you were so broken, you weren't deemed a threat.

Feelings came crashing after the fact.

Angelus' return took a toll on Buffy and Spikes appearance began your ascension. You had read classics before; Giles didn't exactly keep copies of Dr. Seuss or even Baum. It was all Bronte, Shelly, or Austen. Writers who taught you that humans love and to love is human and you didn't understand at all not until

"And who might you be, love?"

What are you wasn't the question and he called you "love". Could you be called love, was that something you could be. With how much honey you consumed, you probably were part honey, but even outside of that, when the humans introduce themselves, they say "I am..." so you said "I am Honey" to fit in.

But he called you Love.

You didn't doubt Willow, but you wondered if being Honey was a mistake, if being love was an option. To be love would mean to have love and how did one do that.

"I am Honey." you replied. 3 words that didn't even scratch the surface of what you wanted to say. Maybe speech was more lost on you than you thought.

A lot of time had passed since then. A few apocalypses, a more modern and appropriate speech pattern, plenty of feelings and more importantly, the knowledge that feelings couldn't be shared.

Being so far removed from everyone else made it easy to notice things that they didn't. You noticed her push him away. You had heard him confess. You had become friends after a while, and there were many moments when you would be in his crypt talking to him in between bottles of wine and blood, pigs' blood after he became aware of his feelings. He told you about her, he raved about her bravery, he retold her jokes. The affect she had on him was palpable, impossible to ignore. His lips spoke of Buffy, he cried tears that reflected Buffy, even when he looked at you, he was looking for pieces of Buffy. That was the only explanation for why he would look at you for so long. You weren't a genius, you weren't even a poet, but you knew better than to delude yourself. And yet

He looked at you.

He watched you. He saw you. He perceived you; and it was so beautiful.

He also told you of Dru. She would have moments of clarity when she would revert to the ghost of who she was before Angelus drove her insane. Moments when she would look at the stars, not because she was seeing things, but because she was looking at them. Like the haze of one thousand years had cleared and she was looking at the stars, not shiny shards of glass wedged in a rocky ceiling. She stopped echoing wishes, and she made them. He even told you her favorite wish. She wanted a pretty dress to go to a pretty ball. It was so normal and human. She wanted to exist and be a girl in her own time again, like it used to be. Maybe she also wanted to be human.

Sometimes, if you found the strength in you to stomach it, you liked to think he looked at you like how she used to look at the stars. Like Buffy was his pipe dream and you were what he really wanted.

It wasn't a stretch of the imagination. She was a slayer, and he was a vampire. She is a pipe dream. She was the false stars of shattered glass, she was dangerous to him, she would hurt him. She has hurt him.

Every time he told her he loved her, she told him no. A step worse than rejection, she denied he even could love her. Demons weren't capable of love; he was experiencing obsession. He wanted to own her, to take her, ravish her and leave her a husk of who she used to be then toss her when the infatuation faded. He didn't need to, she already was. Death did that to her, she didn't need Spike to finish the job. And obsession. If what Spike felt towards her was obsession, then what the hell was she feeling.

This all lead to today. An old show playing on the boxy television, sitting on a newly stolen couch, occasionally passing a bowl of popcorn between the two of you. The show was a cheesy vampire comedy where the main character had finally cornered the terrifying "Dracula" and staked him with a cartoonishly large stake. "Blood squirted everywhere, coating the main character with what was probably corn syrup, chocolate syrup, and red food dye.

"That is totally unrealistic. Us vampires don't bleed, and he would've seen that stake from a mile away." he said while tossing a handful of popcorn at the screen.

"I doubt they had a way to turn him to dust back in like the 40's." he scoffed at your nonchalance.

"This is ridiculous. Us vampires need better representation on the telly, they're makin' us look like bumbling idiots." you can' help but laugh at his dramatics. In his rage, his hair had fallen out of place. It wasn't gelled like it usually was, a mistake he'll probably rectify in a few hours when the sun goes down.

"I didn't know you took such pride in being a vampire." He dramatically jumps to face you, a disgusted look on his face.

"Of bloody course I do. Why on Earth would I want to be human."

"Maybe Buffy would like you if you were human." For anyone else it would've been a low blow, but he lets you slide. That and the fact that beneath the mocking tone you took, you didn't laugh at it all that much.

"Would you want to be human, love?" There it is again. You should be used to it by now, but you still every time you hear it from him. Maybe because when it comes from him you want it. You had been on dates with other guys, some of whom confessed to you. The Scoobies told you they loved you multiple times before, even better, they all meant it and the feeling is mutual. Why is it still so much different with him.

"I don't know, I think it could be nice. I think life would be easier." He smiled.

"Why? You're not a vampire, you can frolic in the sun as much as you'd like." you shake your head.

"That's not it." What could it be? Spike wasn't often confused, as a matter of fact he was extremely self-assured, but he couldn't figure out what you were missing out on. He'd much rather be in you position than to remember every sin he's ever committed. You got the immortality and the powers with none of the guilt that comes with it.

"If I was human, I wouldn't be nearly as confused. I'd know more, I guess."

"But what if you never lost your memory? Knowing things wouldn't be an issue." If only knowing your name was the knowledge you were seeking.

"Knowing things wouldn't be an issue but there are some uniquely human things I can't experience because I'm not a human."

"Like what?" Being human at one point was interesting, it was so ingrained in Spike he couldn't imagine what it would be like for feelings to not be second nature. He never needed to understand them, feeling them was more than enough.

"I don't know because I'm not human. I don't know what I'm missing, but I'm missing something." Quit beating around the bush.

"What if you didn't need to be human and it just fell out?"

"What is so bad about being human that it fell out."

"Trust me, as a former human myself, there is plenty to hate about being human. They're puny and pathetic." He pulled a pack of cigarettes from the couch along then struck a match against a loose plank of wood. Bringing it to his lips, he inhaled the smoke and blew it away from your face, but the breeze from an open (broken) window whisked it towards your face anyway.

"But is that because you were human, or because you are you?" His gaze hardened at how quick the answer came.

"You think I was pathetic?" The fallen embers came onto his pants, but he paid them no mind.

"You think you used to be pathetic." Though this was true, a part of him felt offended. Even stranger, he didn't know which part.

"Because I was. I was human and emotional and a bloody mess, because I was human. Demons don't feel anything which is far better than feeling and getting hurt."

"But you aren't demon enough to know what it means to feel nothing!" You weren't a demon to him, though. It would've been easy for him to forget that you weren't one of those pesky humans had it not been for your distinctly not human scent. It was like whisky, rich and old and expensive. Too expensive to break open and drink because it grew more valuable with time. He'd do anything for you not to go to waste.

"And if you want to feel so badly, you can't possibly be that much of a demon!" To waste you would for you to be human. They're too fragile. They die. Spike longed to be a demon because at his core, he was a coward. He didn't want to die. Judging by how much you yearned to be human, you feared loneliness more.

"Why do you love Buffy so much." Ah, the point.

Spike was many things. A bastard, one of those British nancy boys, a coward, a freak. A thing he prided himself the most on was his intellect. He was insightful, he could be emotionally intelligent when he wanted to be. This was the important part.

A part of him knew his best friend loved him. A part he profusely ignored because he was only emotionally intelligent when he wanted to be. He could admit that he was intellectual and intelligent and at times wise, he believed those to be self-evident truths, cornerstones of his Spikeism. He's the brooding, yet insightful, bad boy with a heart of gold who does the right thing when it conveniences him. He's an actor and this was the character he's had centuries to build, and he'd be damned it cracked because then he'd be proving that he was never anything more than William "The Bloody Bad Poet".

Maybe self-hatred was the root of it. The inescapable need- no instinct, to kick himself in the ass at any possible opportunity, was why he ignored you. It had to be some sick penchant for pain, or the belief that he wasn't deserving of good things, because if you were nothing else, you were good to him which meant you deserved better than him.

But altruism doesn't fit into the paradigm of Spike. Altruism is William's thing which made this so much more horrifying. William loved you. Spike loving you meant nothing because he didn't really mean it. The stage kisses and the dramatized sex scenes were suffocatingly filled with false passion, more passion than humanly possible. Spike loved hard, William loved deeply, and both loved you. It couldn't be undone, but it could be forgotten.

"I don't know." Those 3 words didn't even begin to scratch the surface of why he "loved" her.

"But all I know of love comes from you, I learned it from you, and you don't know why you love her?" You wanted to cry, and you hated it. If you could take it back, you would. You wished you had shut your mouth and watched the stupid show that was still playing as you had this argument.

"Love isn't something you explain." He put distance between the two of you, standing up and walking away from the couch in search for a bottle of alcohol. He wasn't planning on you following him, following closer than the tail of his leather duster.

You threw the alcohol before his hand even grazed it, smashing it against the concrete walls of his crypt. Positioning yourself between himself and the makeshift table that used to be a grave, you stood your ground. Blinking back tears because the second water hit that cement you were done for.

"Then show me. That's how I learned before." He clenched then unclenched his jaw. Buffy was all over him, but you were inside of him. The air he breathed, the blood in his veins, the force making his heart beat was you and it always had been. "Show me."

He was scared.

"What if you don't understand." He was stalling. For too long he hadn't been allowed to have anything. Dru was never his because Angelus had ingrained his way into her very being. Buffy was never realistic, and even if she was, she was human. One day she'd die, and he'd move on long before that date anyways. You were so attainable, and you were willing to be his. What if he fucked up. He has, right in front of him, sharing breaths mere inches from each other, everything he had ever wanted, and he didn't even have to fight for it. Handed to him on a silver platter was the key to the universe, but he could find a way to fuck it up. He always did.

"You don't know that." He held your head in his hands, rubbing his thumb over your cheek. His world in the palm of his hands. What if he dropped it.

"You love me?"

"I didn't even know what love was before I met you." You whispered it and he shattered. He kissed you, as if he could pull the sound from your lips so that your confession him that could replay forever in his mind. Like he was sealing some sort of promise so you couldn't take it back.

"I love you." He said in between kisses. "I love you so much it hurts." He kissed you on the forehead." I love you so much it makes me feel alive again." He kissed you on your right cheek, "Longed for you like the sun and cherished you like the stars, I love you.", then on the left.

He looked you in the eyes before kissing you again. As if he wouldn't be there to say it again, as if you could somehow forget it, he said it once more.

"I love you."

[spikedru]

crucially i think drusilla is the only one of the whirlwind who truly deeply cares abt all of its members like darla only really cares abt angelus and even then she would leave him to die as a part of their foreplay and she tolerates drusilla as the only other woman in the group. angel only cares abt darla like drusilla is a toy to him and spike is the stupid runt who isnt being a vampire right and spike only cares abt drusilla he would throw a party if angelus died and prob thinks of darla w the same detached ambilvalence she gives him

[ravelqueen]

One thing that is actually super interesting - character wise is how stark the difference between Angel and Angelus is when compared to Spike and be-souled Spike.

Angelus and Angel might as well be two completely different people - the way they act, react and conceptualise the world around them is honestly completely opposite.

Meanwhile, besouled Spike is a lot more aware of his past actions and isn't interested in killing humans for sport etc, but in the way he interacts with the world around him, he's actually still very similar - he's snarky and sarcastic, romantic yet cynical etc.

It's extra funny when you consider that probably this was never supposed to be a Deep Philosophical Ponderance Of The Nature Of A Soul

In my opinion this came out of happenstance: a writing choice forced on the Buffy team, based on when in the narrative it happened.

Angelus was always set up to be this enormous threat, this absolute monster tormenting Buffy, while Angel was supposed to be this fairytale first romance of a wonderful older boyfriend - the dichotomy was probably decided upon before /in season 1.

Spike on the other hand was never planned to get a soul - he wasn't even supposed to stick around longer than the 2nd season! However, the ensoulment made sense with the progression of the story/character if the writers wanted to adhere to the rules of the universe they set up namely:

Vampires are Evil Demons, inhabiting the body of the human before them, and most importantly they are irredeemable and incapable of true human affection. This is extremely important lore in that universe, because Buffy kills a lot of vampires - in the later seasons they aren't even really a major threat and more background ash. If you suddenly introduce the idea that Actually vampires can be fully redeemed, your main characters has been just murdering Possibly Good People willy-nilly for several seasons

Unfortunately, at this point in the narrative, Spike might as well have been ensouled already - he was acting altruistically, out of love (self-reported) and was mostly just helping our heroes, with motivations unrelated to villainous impulses

So really the writers had to give him a motivation to go and get his soul (the writing choices on how he gets there Being Bad notwithstanding).

HOWEVER, they really really couldn't pull the same move with Spike that they did with Angel re: his 180 degree personality switch simply because the audience liked non-soul Spike. They enjoyed the personality and character that had been crafted for the last 5 seasons, so changing him too much would have with almost complete certainty been met with negative reactions .

Which is why I assume they decided to simply soften parts of his personality, make him stop wanting to kill humans and called it a day on his other less-than-cuddly personality traits.

Which leads us to question on why two people in the same circumstances turned out so wildly different ESPECIALLY since William seemed Basically Alright when he's human.

Does that mean that Angel is fundamentally a worse person, only held back by the morality of his soul? Or that he was fundamentally a much more virtuous man and therefore the loss of his goodness had a larger impact, as removing those parts took away more of what he used to be?

That William was a lot more acerbic and mean deep down and therefore not too different? Or that actually William lost way less of his morality/capacity for empathy when he turned because Something and that led him to doing less awful things that would lead to a personality change??

Those are such interesting questions that somehow the show never addresses (as far as I know? comics people?) aside from Angel Being Mad that Spike got over his angst so quickly and it's just hilarious to me that if I'm right this basically was never meant to be that deep and simply just a byproduct of What The Fuck To Do With Spike

[raisedbythetv89]

THEY'RE THE SAME DO YOU UNDERSTAND!!!! 😭

Both innocent, big hearted, gifted, young women - targeted, terrorized, and traumatized by angel/angelus (his method of systemically destroying young women's innocence and sanity gets less extreme as angel but he's the same predatory, selfish, sociopathic, creep with and without the soul)

I like to think the dreams were the tiny human part of dru that still mourns her family and her human self trying to warn/save buffy who she saw so much of herself in. Both what happened to her because of angelus and her lost potential because she was killed

I also like to think she subconsciously pushed Spike away and sent him to Buffy because Dru knew Buffy would need him the way she needed him to heal her after Angel

[bleedingichorhearts]

𝕬𝖓𝖌𝖊𝖑𝖚𝖘 𝕷𝖆𝖕𝖘𝖚𝖘

𝕬𝖚𝖙𝖍𝖔𝖗: Who doesn’t want a Spartan? Also thank you @kit-williams for practically being my mentor. This can also be found in my “ᴛᴀɢ ʟɪꜱᴛ ᴀᴘᴘʟɪᴄᴀᴛɪᴏɴ” if you would like to be tagged.

TW: Google Translation, Violence?

I woke up with a start, catching the hand that dared to reach for my face. Eyes boring into the person's soul while they tried to yanked their hand away.

Another, different hand caught my offending wrist. Their hand, stronger, bolder, and rougher. Pinning my hand back against the bed while his icy blue eyes; barely hidden by the shadow of his mask, stared down at me.

It left me frozen for a moment, staring into the icy depths of his eyes. A certain devotion in them that left my skin prickling.

He was a towering man with warm olive skin, and dawned in bronze armor with an almost unseeable face glaring down at me. Oh he was definitely a sight to see when waking up.

Jumping into ‘flight or fight,’ I gave a right hook to his helmet with my other hand. A crack echoing out as the soldier stumbled back, surprised while I pulled myself on top of him like a koala, trying to take off his red cloak. The previous person shouted out, and rambled in a language I didn’t understand. Irritating me as I struggled to get this moody man’s damn cloak.

He kept moving in circles. Tipping over things as he tried in every possible way to get me off his back. His hand sometimes wrapped around a limb, but not at a good enough angle to throw me off properly.

Damn it, man built like a goddamn mountain! Just let me take your cloak, and we will be good. Just stay still a little while longer- damn it! Fine!

Reaching up, I grabbed a wooden beam above me, and hung there for a second. Waiting for the soldier to recover.

The man stumbled, his head snapping up to look at me. Eyes absolutely furious. Quickly, I used my legs to wrap around his helmet when he came forward, his hands coming up to my thighs trying to dislodge me.

Putting most of my body weight down on him. I grabbed a hold of his helmet and leaned to the side, going full dead weight on him as we both fell to the stone ground. A loud clunk, and thud going off from our fallen body’s. A grunt coming from the soldier.

Successfully taking the cloak off from him. I didn’t account for his hand pressing into my ribs, a groan leaving my lips. Legs loosening around his helmet as he quickly pulled himself away.

Scrambling to get up on my own feet again, not intending to be pinned down by a chiseled man that I have no doubt that would keep me pinned underneath him. I made haste for the nearest window and jumped out of it.

“Angelus lapsus!” I heard the soldier shout when I jumped from the window. My feet landed harshly onto a wooden roof that broke beneath me at the sudden weight.

Straw surrounded me as my breath left my lungs. My mouth gaping open as I couldn’t breathe, like I forgot how too. My body, trying to curl up on itself to protect the most vital parts of itself.

Slowly shuffling around on the ground. Chuff-like sounds came from me as I struggled to regain my breath. I felt incredibly itchy, dirty even. To be in a bundle of hay, much less a stable of sorts.

Grabbing onto a wooden fence. I pulled myself up on it. My hand beginning to pulse when I slugged that bronze helmet of the soldier. Probably breaking a finger or two by just doing that.

With huff, I looked up at the soldier who looked down at me from the window I jumped from. His shadow only being seen as he quickly moved away from the window.

Using the slight time advantage, I wrapped the cloak in my hands around my shoulders. Hopefully covering me just enough that no one will get suspicious. Especially in the morning.

I wasn’t a fool to know I was in a different timeline. The bronze warrior, the different languages spoken, and the way the houses are made, and decorated are very different from the modern era. Smelled a lot cleaner too.

Flipping up the makeshift hood I’ve made from the cloak. The cloak smelled like it had a musky mint scent that hung to it, and it was a rather clean cloak too. There weren't any tears or stains on it. Was it a brand new cloak? Or was the soldier a clean person?

Stumbling my way out of the stable. I made my way through the streets of this…town? City? In hopes to get out of it quickly. I don’t belong here. I don’t belong in this timeline. Who knows what the people of this time would do if they found out I was not from here?

Another wheeze left my mouth while I cradled my aching hand to my chest. My other hand rested on the corner of a house to stabilize myself.

I could feel that some of my ribs had broken as I touched them lightly with my hand. It’s light pressure on both sides not helping the pain as I felt around for the broken ribs.

I don’t even remember having an event that developed into broken ribs. All I remember is taking a well needed rest, and now I’m here? That didn’t make any sense, why would I end up here in all of the places? In all of the worlds? In all of the timelines?

“Angelus lapsus!” The same soldier yelled, his voice sounded deeper, demanding up close. A spear lodging into the stone in front of me. My nerves jumped at the sound of it being thrown.

Looking back to where the man stood on top of a stone staircase. I gave him my own glare while I straightened up to look at him. His eyes not backing down from mine when I put my hand on the wood of his lodged spear.

Taking the spear from the stone. I gathered enough strength to throw it backup to him. His body moving swiftly sideways, catching the damn spear with ease. His stoic eyes never left mine as I realized this man had a lot of experience.

A spike of unease shot through my nerves. This wasn’t a man I could just kill. He was a man that I had to fight, or lose to, and neither of those options seemed worth it right now.

“Angelus lapsus. Veni huc.” The bronze man spoke again. His form suddenly felt unimaginable to stand 15 feet from. He was much taller than a few moments ago.

Taking a step back when he took one forward. His shadow nearly engulfed my own figure. We both watched each other carefully. Unsure what the other would do.

Would they dash for it? Rush me? Throw me into a wall? Pin me down? Throw their spear again? Just what exactly will the other one do?

His next step chose the decision for me as I turned back around to run away from the soldier, making a dash for it. No way in hell was I gonna try to tackle a man built like a mountain. The dude was at least 7 feet tall! I thought Spartans were 5 '9 on average?

The bronze man shouted out again in his language, that I still have yet to understand what the hell he is saying to me.

What type of language is he speaking to me? It wasn’t Greek. It was more of an ancient language, perhaps Latin? Was I in an Ancient Greek timeline?

I mean, that part could have been more obvious of how the soldier looked. He had the bronze armor of the Spartans and the red cloak they chose as their banner color.

Turning down a tight alleyway I could hear woven baskets falling over that the Spartan tripped over, a growl coming out of his mouth. Urging me to be just a little bit faster than I was despite having some broken ribs that make it painful to run, even twist.

Turning down another alleyway in hopes to avoid his sights. I ended up in a dreadful dead end. A very tall shadow slowly casting over my smaller form.

“Angelus lapsus.” The man’s monotone voice came out again, sending a shiver up my spine when I turned back to look at him. There was something about him that made him feel off. Something I can’t place.

Jumping back, a yelp came from my mouth as he threw his spear into the wall next to me again. Its point very well longed into the wall this time as I looked between him, and the spear before using it to my advantage.

Jumping onto the spear and climbing on top of the dead end wall, nearly tipping over to the other side. A curse of his language came off his tongue from behind me.

Using the wall a bit longer to hopefully get farther away from the Spartan. I slid off the wall when I thought it was safe before zigzagging my way through the ancient city that used to be in shambles. Getting lost a couple of times myself with all the corners I’ve turned.

Pausing to take a look around my surroundings. I wanted to find the best way to run away from this Spartan that seemed to make it his personal mission to collect me. To possibly bring me back where I woke up from.

However, not seeing anything in sight, not even a dock, my only available option was to find a way out of this city and make my way through the surrounding area. From what I assume would be a forest.

Making my way through the quiet night of the city I felt like I could feel an infinite set of eyes on my back since the Spartan had pursued me. My shoulders, heavy with anxiety.

Oh, how am I gonna find my way back to my own timeline in a primitive place like this? There was nothing here for me to figure out on how to get back. Was there even a way to get back?

I sighed and shook my head, slowly going through the city more with at least something to keep me going, and that’s to keep away from the Spartan.

The Spartan, who is only a couple roads down. His eyes staring down my form before slowly pursuing once more.

“Angelus lapsus, ego te capiam.”

ℕ𝕖𝕩𝕥 ℂ𝕙𝕒𝕡𝕥𝕖𝕣: 𝐀𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐥𝐮𝐬 𝐋𝐚𝐩𝐬𝐮𝐬 II

[oveliagirlhaditright]

I'm super late talking about the Kingdom Hearts VR Experience, I know. I was a bad fan and only skimmed a video of it when it originally came out. But I finally watched all of it and I love how you get different camera angles of scenes we've seen before with it! That might be useful for video editing.

[calisources]

THE ONE WITH THE FACE OF AN ANGEL. all sentences and quotes were taken from Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel the Series. all lines are by Angel and his soulless self, Angelus, so be warned a few of these are explicit or allude to sexual acts or have double meaning. change names, pronouns and locations (and ages) as you see fit.

That Slayer...she's a pistol.

I wanna torture you. I used to love it, and it's been such a long time. I mean, the last time I tortured someone, they didn't even have chainsaws.

Hey! Who's a guy gotta kill to get a drink around here?!

How sweet that virgin tasted, the fresh smell of a newborn's neck. My first nun - now that's a great story.

As for you, you luscious thing. I mean, you were going to let me out of that cage, so, let's see. I'll give you, what, a ten second start.

Don't be jealous, kitten. She's just the warm-up. I'll save the good stuff for you.

Angel,I love you,but I can't be with you...you ate babies...chicks.

The rumors are true. Angel has left the building, and I am back.

What won't I miss? The moralizing. Soul's already in the ether, boyo. I can smell it.

Tell you what. I'll torture ya for a few unbelievably long hours, and you can tell me if this is the lifestyle for you.

Passion rules us all. And we obey. What other choice do we have? Passion is the source of our finest moments.

If we could live without passion, maybe we'd know some kind of peace. But we would be hollow. Empty rooms, shuttered and dank.

Kill you? Why would I kill you when I can live off you for a month?

I don't want to share my feelings.I don't want to open up. I want to find the guy who killed Tina and look him in the eye.

Are you mad at me for being around too much or not being around enough?

I don't need strength. I just need the sun to rise.

I hated the girls back then.especially the noble women...they were just incredibly dull.

They have no taste for the undead. Not that a sting would do me any damage, it's just... tonight's special.

There's a lot I don't understand. I do know it's important to keep fighting. I learned that from you.

My people, before I was changed, they exchanged this as a sign of devotion. It's a claddagh ring.

Wear it with the heart pointing towards you. It means you belong to somebody.

I'm sorry. I wanted to take you out somewhere fun. It's been a long time since I've been to the movies. They've changed.

How can we be together if the cost is your life, or the lives of others? I know. I couldn't tell you. I wasn't sure - if I could do it if I woke up with you one more morning.

Don't mistake me. I do love the ladies. It's just lately... I've been wondering... what it'd be like... to share the slaughter of innocents... with another man.

Don't... I don't think that makes me some kind of a deviant, hmm? Do you?

Sorry about the chains. It's not that I don't trust you, it's... Actually, it is that I don't trust you.

I can walk like a man but I'm not one.

I'm weak. I've never been anything else.

I wanted to lose myself in you. I know it will cost me my soul, and part of me didn't care. It's not the demon in me that needs killing, Buffy, it's the man.

For a hundred years I offered ugly death to everyone I met, and I did it with a song in my heart.

You're a wreck! She's stronger than any Slayer you've ever faced. Force won't get it done. You gotta work from the inside. To kill this girl... you have to love her.

Let me guess, you summoned back the true Angelus because you need a new boy toy.

Oh, my cure? No, thanks. Been there, done that, and deja vu just isn't what it used to be.

The elders conjured the most perfect punishment for me. They restored my soul.

When you become a vampire, the demon takes your body, but it doesn't get your soul; that's gone. No conscience, no remorse, it's an easy way to live.

You have no idea what it's like to have done the things I've done...and care. I haven't fed on a human being since that day.

See? Whenever we fight you always bring up the vampire thing.

Gave her the puppy dog "I'm all tortured" act. Keeps her off my back when I feed.

Listen, if we date, you and I both know one thing's going to lead to another.

This isn't some fairy tale. When I kiss you, you don't wake up from a deep sleep and live happily ever after.

I did a lot of unconscionable things when I became a vampire. Drusilla was the worst. She was ... an obsession of mine. She was pure, sweet, and chaste.

Killed everybody she loved. Visited every mental torture on her I could devise. She eventually fled to a convent, and on the day she took her holy orders, I turned her into a demon.

She made me feel like a human being. That's not the kind of thing you just forgive.

Spike, boy you never did learn your history.

If I was blind, I would see you.

A demon isn't a man. I was a man once.

Because I wanted to! Because I want you so badly! I want to take comfort in you.

Am I a thing worth saving, huh?! Am I a righteous man? The world wants me gone!

I watched you, I saw you called, it was a bright afternoon out in front of your school. You walked down the steps and ... I loved you.

Because I could see your heart. You held it before you for everyone to see, and I was worried that it would get bruised or torn. And more than anything in my life, I wanted to keep it safe.

I can stay in town as long as you want me.

I never was much for preachers.

God, I missed watching this.

I’ll start working on the second front. Try not to use it.

Hm. You smell so good. So warm. I miss that.

You're wrong. You don't know what it is you're asking me to do.

Oh, what's the matter? Look a little nervous.

They always mistake me for the character I play. They never see the real me!

When you kill them. Some just stand there frozen while others.. . 

This was about saving somebody's soul. That's what I do here and you're not a part of it.

That's great, it's nice you moved on; I can't. You found someone new; I'm not allowed to, remember?

I see you again, it cuts me up inside, and the person I share that with is me.

You don't know me anymore, so don't come down here with your great new life and expect me to do things your way. Go home.

Buttering me up. Getting me all relaxed, hm? Not the most innovative interrogation technique, but... OK, I'll play.

Well, now that's a question. Not a great question. Not even an insightful question. 

So much for stand by your man. Then again, you probably like her on her knees.

The more you piss me off, the longer I'll keep you alive.

Oh, something tells me she's a screamer.

Hey, you remember that time you tried to get Angel to kill you because you felt all weepy over being such a bad little girl. Huh? Do you still feel that way? Do you still wanna die?

Well, it's not really the kind of message you tell. It sort of involves finding the bodies of all your friends.

I don't need to see movies to get worked up. Just being around you does that just fine. It feels nice, just to feel.

You still my girl?

I know what you're thinking. Maybe there's some good deep down inside of me that remembers and loves you, if only you could reach me.

You know what I just can't believe, all of our time together and we never tried chains.

Dream on, schoolgirl. Your boyfriend is dead and you're all gonna join him.

[coraniaid]

In Season 2's Becoming, after being outed as the Slayer to her mother, Buffy delivers a monologue in which she insists she never wanted to be a Slayer ("do you think I choose to be like this? do you have any idea how lonely it is, how dangerous?") and that she wishes she could be doing almost anything else with her life ("God, even studying") but she doesn't have a choice ("I have to save the world, again"). Indeed by the end of the episode that obligation to put her own desires aside and do whatever's necessary to save the world will force her to send the man she loves to hell. Being a Slayer explicitly costs her everything she cares about ("I've got nothing left to lose", as she tells Whistler even before killing Angel).

So, obviously, large sections of the Buffy fandom on here have decided that this means Buffy loves being a Slayer and has fully accepted it as a part of who she is, that she has no rational reason to resent Giles at all, and that she only leaves town at the end of the episode (leaving a note behind for her mother and not telling anybody else) because her mother doesn't accept her and "kicks her out of the house" (an empty threat that Buffy takes so literally she's back in her bedroom packing for LA before the episode ends).

.... I mean, you do see how at odds with the text this reading is, right? However much you want Joyce to be the singular villain here, she's really not.

Buffy: "I never wanted to be a Slayer and in fact being a Slayer has made me miserable and I'm going to run away and change my name and hide from my Watcher so I don't have to be the Slayer anymore"

The fandom, incessantly: "hoho, Joyce blames Giles for Buffy running away, how ridiculous".

(Yes, there is a popular metaphorical reading of the show in which Buffy being "the Slayer" should be understood as Buffy being bi or trans or otherwise queer. And yes, in this reading Joyce's reaction to finding out the truth about her daughter-- already not great! -- becomes particularly terrible.

But that specific metaphorical reading is the not the One True Way of understanding the show. It's not something to which every single thing that happens on screen can be reduced. It's simply one interpretation among many and, in some episodes -- like this one! -- it works less well than it does at other times.

In the actual text of the show, Buffy has just told her mother that she's a reluctant child solider recruited into an impossibly dangerous conflict by a man who Joyce barely knows. A man who has insisted Buffy keep this all secret from her mother and lied to her face about it for months (Giles wouldn't even let Joyce know about vampires after a vampire trying to hurt Buffy attacked her in her own home! He didn't let her know about Angelus!)

Of course Joyce is upset about this! Of course she blames Giles! You know who else often blames Giles for Buffy having to be a Slayer? You know who started this season with a nightmare in which Giles tried to murder Buffy? Buffy herself.)

[myboyknows]

Blood Vengeance

So today in the Fanged Four Discord server, we were talking about ship/group names, and I had a realization that I've never had before in the twenty years that I've been writing Spangel fanfic.

Spike: What do you have in mind?

Angel: I think it's time the Immortal found out exactly who he's dealing with. I think it's time for blood vengeance.

Angel: Blood vengeance. Look, I'm sure we're on the list. Is there anything under blood vengeance?

I love everything about this scene, of course, but the more I thought about it this morning, the more I was like... Angel is referring to himself and Spike here, together, by the name Blood Vengeance. As if that's how they're collectively known, the two of them. As if that's what people call them (or maybe what people call them specifically when they're out for revenge). Like some kind of super group made up of just Angel and Spike: you've got the X-Men, the Avengers, the Justice League, the Power Rangers, the Suicide Squad, and Blood Vengeance.

And it's not just that he refers to them this way, but that he's literally asking if they're on Morty's invitation list this way. This is a list of real people's names! And he's checking to see if they're on it together under the single title of Blood Vengeance!

I know that none of the ship names we use in this fandom are actually mentioned in canon; we do the common smooshname thing for our ships, which is fine. But it's really interesting to me that aside from names like The Oracles, The Furies, and The Gorch Brothers - who are all siblings - Blood Vengeance is the only (???) group of two characters who canonically seem to have a name that means both of them together, that they actually use to refer to themselves in the specific context of names, as on an invitation list. Literally a ship name built right into the show. It's kind of a shame that the scene occurs right near the end of canon, after the name Spangel was already established for the ship. Because I think it would be so fun for their ship name to be a thing they actually - at least sometimes - call themselves.

But also, after Angel has them check the list for Blood Vengeance, there's the best part:

Spike: Maybe it's under Angelus.

THEY LITERALLY CHECKED FOR BLOOD VENGEANCE FIRST! BEFORE THEIR ACTUAL NAMES.

I'm constantly finding new things about AtS to love, but I think this is going to be my favorite thing for a little while. It just makes me happy.

[iwillrememberyoumarathon]

I Will Remember You Fic Marathon 2023: Masterlist

Thank you to our amazing Buffy/Angel writers and artists for an event that exceeded all of our expectations! Here are the incredible 41 stories and 15 artworks that made up this year's revamped marathon:

Day 1: daughter by bonniesfire (@lalosalamcnca) Day 2: Yours, Always by @buffy-targaryen Day 3: Breaking Up Is Hard To Do by NicHawkins Day 4: After School Special by a2zmom Day 5: Insatiable by MadeInGold (@reallyreal-madeingold) Day 6: Isn’t It Lovely? (To Die At The Hand of The One You Love) by TemperanceCain Day 7: Amaranthine by Lalaith_Quetzalli (@lalaithquetzallicaresi) Day 8: Wake-Up Call by MamaBewear Day 9: Blush by @aboutafox Day 10: The kitchen won’t collapse if men are cooking! by Liana_Medea

Day 11: Alone by Lalaith_Quetzalli Day 12: The Monster Stomp by a2zmom Day 13: The Circle by KairosImprimatur (@kairosimperative) Day 14: love thy neighbour by bonniesfire (@lalosalamcnca) Day 15: Fool Me Twice by @oveliagirlhaditright Day 16: I Know Those Eyes/This Man Is Dead by Greensword101  Day 17: Of Prophecies and True Love’s Kiss by @ultramarineorchid Day 18: The Red Gate by @bluestarsandclouds Day 19: Overexcited by AmorousGreen (@calenlily) Day 20: Angelus’s Mercy: Part Two by MCorey1317 Day 21: Being Known by Kean (@keanherself) Day 22: Not Like Before by @buffy-targaryen Day 23: I Can’t Remember by MeTheMermaid (@casenpoint) Day 24: Side Mission by @taaroko Day 25: The Chosen Princess and the Shadow Knight by KairosImprimatur (@kairosimperative) Day 26: the girl and the ash by claddaghrings (@bangelism) Day 27: Our Little Family by twinkielove6 Day 28: Can It Be Right to Give What I Can Give? by @asoulofstars & blackdragonhellfire Day 29: An Aspect Of by GraceNM Day 30: Six Times Angel Lost Buffy And One Time He Didn’t by @aboutafox

Day 31: Two Hot Whiskeys by Liana_Medea Day 32: It's Just That I Stayed (Too Long) by @buffy-targaryen Day 33: Two Steps Back by a2zmom Day 34: Schism by KairosImprimatur (@kairosimperative) Day 35: Always by Lalaith_Quetzalli (@lalaithquetzallicaresi) Day 36: On Little Cat Feet by a2zmom Day 37: Freaky Things by @oveliagirlhaditright Day 38: Counterfeit Innocence by @calenlily Day 39: Reverence by Scribes1015 Day 40: Slayer, Interrupted (A Post-Reunion Trilogy Story) by MCorey1317 Day 41: In My Veins by @taaroko

Artworks

1. Sarah Michelle Gellar & David Boreanaz: Bangel stanning over the years. - gifset by @liam-summers 2. Buffy/Angel for “I Will Remember You” Month 2023 - video by @oveliagirlhaditright 3. Forever and Always - video by @bluestarsandclouds 4. She Promised - gif + wallpaper by @lalaithquetzallicaresi 5. Bangelus - Nine Inch Nails - gifset by @marie-moreaus 6. Moments - video by @bluestarsandclouds 7. Buffy and Angel art with chalk brushes - drawing by @kairosimperative 8. Bangel — I Will Remember You - gifset by @marie-moreaus 9. “So, no touching…” / “We stay in touch…” - photoedit by @oveliagirlhaditright 10. Buffy and Angel - Maybe If I Tell Myself Enough - video by @broke-me-into-pieces 11. Buffy and Angel - An Evening I Will Not Forget - video by @bluestarsandclouds 12. AtS 1.08 ♥ I Will Remember You - anniversary gifset by @liam-summers 13. “to live in this world you must be able to do three things…” - gifset by @lalosalamcnca 14. Buffy and Angelus in Innocence - digital painting by @artsying-ifer 15. buffy and angel | work song - video by @bangelism