#lmao 'accidental necromancer soap and ghost roach au's au' kinda

[natelia-aldelliz]

Imagine if Soap started seeing the ghosts of Tommy, Beth, Joseph, and maybe Simon’s mom? Like he has no idea who these people are but they are just like, ‘Oh my god…. That’s Simon’s boy’ and start hanging around

-Anon 🎧

Sadly in the official version of this AU, if they've ever been ghosts they have since moved on and disappeared, but this would be funny as an alternate universe of this alternate universe lmao

So I've written this, it's not really what you said but it's what came to me, maybe I'll write more later, as like a side story or something

"Who are you?"

Soap wakes up with a startle. There's a child standing next to the bed, frowning down at him. A dead child. For some reason he had almost forgotten that sometimes ghosts just come up to him on their own. Children especially, as if they were more discerning of his abilities than adults.

"Huh, hi, I'm Soap," he whispers back to not wake up Simon. Bug isn't anywhere to be seen, but that's not really unusual. His new found abilities to sleep don't work every night, and watching people sleep gets pretty boring. He's probably just roaming around the base.

The child frowns harder. He can't be more than four, with wavy dark blond hair and brown eyes, wearing a super-hero pyjama, blood dripping from the bullet wounds on his chest.

Fuckin hell... It never gets easier.

"You're not Uncle's boyfriend," the child pouts at him with all the might of a toddler.

"Uuuh," Soap hesitates, long enough for the arm around his stomach to tighten its grip, a clear sign that Simon is waking up.

"Wha's goin on?" The older man mumbles against his neck.

"There's a child," Soap answers, "I'm trying to understand what he wants."

"Hmm. Where's Bug?"

"I don't know-"

"Uncle Simon!" The child interrupts him gleefully, now beaming, his frown apparently completely forgotten.

Soap freezes. This man can't catch a break. How does he even go about this? A light thump coming from the door, followed by a "ow!" interrupts his panicking. The door opens right after and Roach comes in, rubbing at his forehead.

"Guys I know none of us know what's happening but I'm gonna need you to start researching, I can't keep becoming material randomly, it hurts and it's embarrassing when I'm spying on people - oh god."

"Uncle Bug!" The child yells again, bouncing on his heels.

Simon's breath quickens slightly behind him, probably still not used to seeing his dead lover, even after a couple weeks of this, which honestly Soap thinks is fair, before he tenses up.

"What are you both not telling me," he demands, sitting up in the bed.

"Are you a friend of my uncle, then?" The child turns back to Soap with less of a frown.

"Uh, no," Bug saves him from answering. "Well, yes, actually, but he's also his boyfriend, like me."

The little boy looks pensive, trying to understand. Simon grabs Soap's arm and turns him around, forcing him to look up at him.

"Johnny, talk to me." His voice is so gentle still, especially when he says his name, but Soap knows it's not a request. It's his officer's voice.

"Maybe ye should ask Bug...?" He tries.

"Bug isn't as easy to break as you."

And he's right. All it takes is for his eyebrows to start pointing up pleadingly and it's over. He's weak, what can he say.

"The child," he sighs, "he's calling ye Uncle Simon. He's basically a toddler, five at most, blond, with-"

"-Brown eyes," Simon interrupts him, looking like he was stabbed. "I know, I only have one nephew."